#i never finalized a design for him thats why it looks like this
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itgetzweird08 · 7 months ago
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“You shouldn’t be up this late”
Bakugo’s voice whispered, filling the silence in the dorm kitchen. He was right, and usually you weren’t. You valued your sleep, often being one of the first in the class to call it a night. But tonight was different. Your thoughts, your heart, were restless. Despite following your nighttime routine, which was curated specifically to help you wind down and rest, you still found yourself tossing and turning. Not even your ocean sounds could help you drift to sleep. Thats why when Bakugo spoke, you sighed heavily and let your shoulders droop.
“Yeah. I know.”
He took a few steps toward you, leaning against the countertop. “So what’s got you awake?” You shrugged at him, watching the water in the electric kettle begin to form small bubbles. “Dunno…just can’t sleep I guess.” You looked over to him, taking soft note of his tired eyes and disheveled hair. “And you? You aren’t usually awake at this time either.” He shrugged right back at you. “Dunno…can’t sleep I guess” he echoed your words, and it made you smile just a bit.
You both knew why the other was awake, or at least you both had some inkling. Between how the ambush attack played out and Midoriya running away, neither of you have had time to really process all of what has gone on. You haven’t had time to think about how your lives had been flipped one eighty. But since Midoriya was back safe and sound, and there was no real information on the League or their next move, everything was at a standstill. That meant your brain was finally coming up to speed on what had gone on recently…and it was overwhelming. It felt like your mind was in over drive, thinking so many thoughts at once that it was causing you to lose sleep.
“…There’s a lot of water in this kettle. Would you like some tea?” Bakugo didn’t answer, just walked over to the mug cabinet and grabbed both of your designated mugs. Yours had your hero insignia, and he had his. It was Nezu’s Christmas gift for all of the hero course students. Bakugo opened the tea drawer, grabbing you each a packet of sleepytime zen tea before walking back over to you. You worked in silence then, enjoying each other’s company as you made your own cups.
Your relationship with Bakugo was unique. You admired him, even when he was a bit of an asshole at the beginning of the school year. You’ve enjoyed watching him grow and working beside him as a teammate. You were inspired by his tenacity and drive. You liked how smart and witty he was, and how he could be funny even when he didn’t realize it. It also didn’t hurt that he was actually pretty cute. And all of the same things went for you in his eyes. He admired your kindness and your courage. He was inspired by the way you had such a big heart but you were no push over, standing up to him when he got too rough with his words or during training. In his eyes, it was like you were one of the only people to give him a chance, getting to know him past his rough exterior. You two had gotten closer during the year, training and studying together sometimes. You began to sit next to him for lunch, stealing small pieces of chicken from his plate while he stole beef from yours. You were the only one with that privilege. Eventually, you became this unlabeled, unspoken thing. You didn’t have to confess your feelings because he knew, and you knew how he felt about you even if he’s never admitted it.
You softly sipped your tea, allowing the warm liquid to run down your throat and causing you to sigh. He stirred his own cup, watching the spoon go around and around. Technically, there was nothing else for you two to do in the kitchen. Technically, you could’ve parted ways right here and drank your own cups in your rooms. But you couldn’t bear to leave him. Deep down, you both didn’t want to be alone tonight.
“Bakugo?” He looked up as you said his name. “Could I sleep over in your room tonight? I don’t think I want to be alone”
All he did was scoff, pick up his mug and began walking towards the staircase. When he realized you weren’t following, he scowled and turned to look at you.
“Let’s go brat. I’m missing out on my beauty sleep”
Part two
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Ps: im starting to do requests! So if you have an idea for me, go ahead and put it in my asks <3
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alluringnectar · 6 months ago
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my baby
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pairings; loser!ellie williams x cheerleader! reader
cw; interalized homophobia, angst, tribbing, fingering (r! recieving), fluff, bullying (kinda), making out, slur, petnames like “baby & princess” , not proof read yet!
wc; 17k
life has never been better, you were handed the world at the age of 6. you never had to worry about having no friends, or not having the latest designer bag, and certainly not having everybody wrapped around your finger. you were a cheerleader & from that only, everyone respected you. you dedicated yourself into looks: always on diets, hitting the gyms, getting your nails done, having the most expensive makeup and so much more. you were the most outgoing girl known to mankind, never missing a rager or party. your friend groups were mainly other cheerleaders, and the jocks on the football team. they were assholes, but you didn’t care because so were you.
you never once paid attention in class, especially english. clicking your pen and having your eyes everywhere but the board. you snap out of your daze when your teacher announces that there will be a partner project, and she would assign the groups. you hear your name, and you pray that you get one of your friends but instead you hear the name ellie williams.
“you cannot be fucking serious” you mutter under your breath, looking at ellie whose a row infront of you.
“what was that?” the teacher asked you. “nothing.” you mock her tone, earning a laugh from your classmates.
“alright then everybody get to your partners we don’t have all day!” she claps her hands, urging everyone to switch their seats.
you stay in your seat, motioning ellie to
come where you are. why would you have to move? ellie rolled her eyes, not having the best impression of you either. “look,” ellie says “i wouldn’t have picked you either.” you scoff, “great to know we’re on the same page!” you look at her green eyes, and the way she flutters her eyelash. you were about to say something until you felt a tap on your shoulder.
it was a jock, and you end up talking to him for the rest of the period, not caring to look back at ellie, who was doing all the work. “another prissy bitch.” ellie thinks to herself.
as soon as the bell rings, ellie packs her stuff and leaves as soon as she could. she sees her friends, dina and jesse, and she sighs in relief. “you would not believe who i got paired up with.” dina and jesse both furrow their brows in unison. “a CHEERLEADER! i swear this world is against me, i already know im gonna have to do this project with myself.” dina replies, “yikes , you have it unlucky. i would NOT wanna be you.” jesse laughs and that makes ellie roll her eyes & reply “thanks dina that makes me feel a million times better.” “well jesse and I have to get going, good luck with her!” dina yells while grabbing jesse by the hand and dragging him through the hallways. ellie sighs and puts her back against the locker.
you put your bag down, and flop down on your bed chewing on some protein bars after practice. you grab your laptop and check your grade book. and thats when you see it. you’re gonna fail english class. “shit shit shit!” you tell yourself, pacing around your room in circles. you couldn’t give to shits if you were failing english, but what you did care about is being on academic probation. if you’re put on academic probation, you won’t be able to cheer. you can’t let that happen. so you grabbed your phone, and started texting everyone for ellie’s number. when you finally receive a message with her number, you smile and immediately text her.
“heyyy”
“who is this?”
“your partner in english.”
“why are you texting me?”
“do you wanna come over tomorrow to work on it?”
“is this a joke?”
“ why would i be? i have practice, so is 7:30 good?”
“yeah, ill be there just give me the address.”
it’s the next day and you come from practice drenched in sweat. you go into the shower, making sure its cold so you can relax. as you get out, you put on a robe and some uggs slipper and you hear the bell ring.
you walk over to answer, the fact ellie was supposed to come over completely slipped your mind. you open the door, and you see ellie.
“shit! is it 7:30 already?”
ellie takes full notice you’re in nothing but a robe and she blushes.
“yeah.”
“fuck im so sorry- practice had me exhausted-“
ellie reassures you, telling you it was okay because she found it kinda cute that your hair was wet and your lips were plump.
“here ellie, you can come inside, just stay in my room, i’ll get changed and i’ll be there in a sec.
ellie nods, and sinks down into your bed. she takes a moment to take in everything in your room. she took note of the way your walls were stripped pink and white to the little ballerina jewelry box that looked antique.
you walk into your room handing her some snacks. “do you want some?” “sure.”
ellie says. & now shes starting to think you’re not a total bitch.
this time, you ended up getting no work done but for a different reason. you spent your time gossiping to ellie, about who slept with who, or who did what. you never realized how pretty ellie truly was. her freckles decorated her face like how constellations decorate the sky. you look down into her lips, and ellie stops talking about whatever she was. ellie and you spend a brief moment just gazing into each other’s eyes.
you both get flustered and she breaks the silence by saying “um- do you have a hair tie?” “yeah of course here” and you hand her one.
you look at the time and gasp, it’s almost 11:30. were you guys really talking for that long? “ellie, do you wanna sleep over? or i can walk yo-“ “no, ill sleep over it’s fine.” you nod. grabbing blankets for her, “you can sleep on my bed i’ll sleep on my couch.” ellie scoffs “no fucking way, i’m not taking your bed, i can have the couch.”
and due to both of your guys’ stubbornness, you are laying next to eachother, in the same bed staring at the ceiling. you look over and you see ellie has fallen asleep. she looked so beautiful and her front hair pieces fell on her face, capturing her beautiful. you move your hand to tuck it but then you get this wave of disgust. not to her, but to yourself.
what the fuck am i doing? I can’t like girls. am i stupid? i’m not gonna be seen as some dyke on the cheerleader team. my reputation would be ruined.
you ended up falling asleep teary eyed, scared to accept if these feelings are really true and maybe they’ll go away.
it’s almost summer, and the feelings are still lingering and infact they are stronger than before. after acing the project, you still
continued to hang out with ellie. you and her hung out every friday, and it became a ritual. you were starting to fall in love with her, and you knew there was no way out. everytime your asshole friends said anything about her that was negative, you jumped to defend her name like a knight. “you know the project deadline was months ago, while do you still hangout with her.” slightly irritated you snap, “she isn’t even bad once you get to know her, she’s funny and sweet.”
it wasn’t any different for ellie either, expect she was 100% convinced you were straight. you never once spoke of your sexuality to her, and for any matter guys in general but why would you like her? she grew up playing with worms, while you grew up going on constant vacations. but even though she thought it would never happen, she asked the universe for this one thing. she prayed to a lord she didn’t even believe in, hoping he will for once listen to her.
God works in mysterious ways because you’re sitting in ellie’s room drinking vodka blasting music. it’s odd how vodka can make somebody so honest. ellie was rambling about a story with an ex she had named cat, and drama between the two. she developed a habit of gossiping, probably from you. to make sure you’re still listening, she asks you. “how about you, any boy trouble?” its silent, and you look at her and start sobbing. ellie’s heart drops down to her stomach and instantly grabs you, pulling you close to her. “hey was it something i said? im sorry-“ “no!” you manage to yell out between your broken sobs. “i don’t think i like guys.” “what?” ellie says, shocked from what she heard.
“when i look at you, it’s not the same for any guy. sure i’ve made out with guys, but not even that gives me the same feeling of when im talking to you. i want it to be you so bad, ellie.” you hiccup, tears staining your eyes. “but this is all new for me, and i hate myself for being this way, i had everything anyone could ask for and it feels like im throwing it all away.”
ellie’s mind is going in all directions, the fact you like her. the fact shes finally getting her prayers answered. she pushes it to the side, because what you need is comfort. ellie holds you tight. so tight, you cannot wiggle out of her grasp. “hey baby, it all works out at the end, your existence isn’t a sin, people who truly love you, will accept you for who you are. and you don’t have to figure things out right now, take your time.” ellie replies, hovering her hand over your face to wipe your tears.
you’re looking up at her, inching your face closer to hers. she leans in, capturing your lips in a kiss. you’re eager for more, so you grab her hair from behind and sloppily slid your mouth inside. ellie pulls away from the kiss, to get air, saliva connecting you guys to each other.
“hey els?” you say softly, having your knees tucked in.
“yeah?”
“since school is ending, there’s gonna be a rager. do you wanna come?”
ellie smiles at you, accepting your offer.
“i’ll be there.”
it’s the day of the rager, and ellie’s at her house with dina and jesse on her bed. “are you sure you really wannq go?” dina asks. ellie’s throwing her clothes everywhere, looking for an outfit to wear. “yeah,” jesse adds on “she doesn’t look like somebody who would hang out with you, what if this is all a prank?” ellie stops to look at them. “guys, i know you’re concerned but trust me on this, okay?” they nod their heads. “whatever happens, you can always tell us okay? whatever you choose to do , we’re with you.” ellie smiles and pulls them into a group hug. she’s wearing a wife pleaser, red flannel, and some jeans. shes tying her converse, she walks out the door, saying “wish me luck!”
she arrives at the house, and the music is so loud she can hear it from where she’s at. nervously she turns to twist the door knob and instantly she goes looking for you. she’s happy today after what happen yesterday, and she’s thinking to herself nothing can change her mood. until she saw you. you had a red solo cup in your hand. you were with a jock, who made it pretty clear he wanted you. was ellie a joke? was everything you said to her nothing after all? her friends were right. clenched fists, she turns to head out of the party, rushing to her car trying not to cry.
the jock wouldn’t take no for an answer, you’ve made it clear you’re not interested in him. “don’t be like that, i see the way you look at me.” you scrunch up your nose in disgust. “well you must be fucking blind.” and thats when you see in the corner of your eye, ellie. “fuck!” you murmur to yourself. ellie is already going towards the exist. as she’s walking down the steps of the porch. you scream, “wait! it’s not what it looks like, i swear-“
“do you think im a fucking joke? you made me feel like a fool.”
“ellie i swear nothing happened i was-“
“were you telling him your pranked worked? were you laughing about me? it’s done. i hope you had your fun.”
ellie is about to turn your back on you.
“ellie im in love with you!” you yell. loud enough
that people from the outside were looking at what was happening.
ellie looks around, “you’re drunk.”
“yes im drunk but that doesn’t change the fact im in love with you. the man that was talking to me. i was telling him to leave me alone. i only have eyes for you ellie! anybody who knows me has to get to know you first!” you breath starts to hitch, knowing you’re about to cry and how people are listening but you no longer care.
“i use to cry, praying that God took these feelings away. now im praying to God for letting me meet you. God knew I needed you Ellie.”
ellie stands there in disbelief, she doesn’t know what to say but her heart is about to explode. she runs to you, takes your hand and takes sits you in the passenger seat. closing the door, she starts the car and starts driving. she looks over at you, and you’re already staring at her. she places a hand on your thigh, and caresses it. “you’re perfect in every way, ways im not. i couldn’t believe somebody as amazing as you would want me, and im sorry.”
you smile, and place your hand on top of hers, “it’s okay, we were both pretty caught up” you giggle.
she would fight the world to hear that giggle again.
she pulls up to your driveway, and shes about to drive off but you ask her to stay the night. and how could she say no to that pretty face of yours?
it’s all dark, but you hold her hand and she follows you into your room. you play some music on your record player.
“do you like mazzy star els?”
“i dont listen to her much, but her voice is pretty.”
you walk up to her, and hold her by the waist. ellie looks down at you and pressed her lips onto yours. you close your eyes, melting into the kiss. you start getting hungrier for more, and you open your mouth to let her tongue slip into yours. the kisses start getting needier, and she walks you until your laying back on your bed. you straddle her waist, and she puts a hand up your dress causing you to whine.
“you’re okay with this right?”
“of course els, please hurry.”
“please what?”
you look away from her gaze, shyly, you fiddle with the seams of ellies wife pleaser and whisper to her , “please touch me, it can only be you.” and with that, ellie is slipping your dress off. kissing your collarbone all the way down to the welts of your breast. she takes off your matching set of panties and bra. and her cold hands on pinching your nipples make your back arch into her touch. she sucks on your nipples, flicking her tongue on it back and forth earning whimpers from you each and every time.
“n-need you els..” you stutter. “im not going anywhere baby.” she chuckles, her breath on your beast making you close your eyes in pleasure. “im gonna touch you now okay? tell me when to stop.” she slides her fingers between your folds.
“already so wet for me princess” and as she hovers to your face to kiss you, her front pieces of her hair are touching your own face. you’re sloppily making out with her, moaning into her mouth.
then she puts two of her fingers in, feeling you instantly clench around them. you start moaning louder and louder “ellie! ellie faster!” and she listens to you, curling her fingers even faster before hitting you in the g spot. your thighs start shaking. and your grabbing onto ellie’s fore arm, clawing it for any way to feel relief.
your moans reach an all time high and you know you’re almost there. im- im about to cum els!” and she starts sucking on your neck, “let it out for me baby, you deserve it come on.” and you reach your climax, sweating and panting. she takes her fingers out of you and sucks them. “you taste so good, everything about you is so sweet.”
still fucked out, you murmured incoherent sentences. “i wanna feel you against me els, please, please.” and ellie looks at you, grabbing your waist to pull you up. you looked at her in this love dovey expression and her heart skips a beat. “can i take this off?” you ask and she gulps and nods. you take off her flannel. then wife pleaser. then her jeans. leaving her in underwear and her sports bra, which now you’re taking off her underwear.
as for the most part both of you are naked, you place your cunt onto hers. you grind against her lightly. both of you whimpering sweet nothings. “i love you els i love you i love you” as you both of you are sweating, holding onto eachother, kissing as you slide on her and feel both of your holes clenching around nothing. “you’re doing so good f’ me” ellie blabbers. both of you are starting to reach your orgasms as you both moan in a higher octave, clawing at each others back, and feeling yourself twitch.
“i think im gonna cum i think-“ “come with me, be a good girl for me please.” she tells you needly, but you can’t even tease her because you want this just as much, if not more. both of you reach your climax, beads of sweat running down each of your fore heads. you disconnect yourself from her cunt. both of your arousals sticking to each other in a way your bodies seem like they’re made to mold into each other’s.
you collapse onto the back of your bed. ellie crawls to lay on your chest. kissing you over and over again, as a way to praise you. you giggle and run your hands through her hair, massaging her scalp.
“shouldn’t we clean up ellie?” you inquire, and you feel her breath on you again as she says “i wanna stay like this.” you nod and you bring blankets over you guys.
“im in love with you too.” ellie tells you.
“i think you showed me already.” you laughed.
“so are we girlfriends?” ellie asks you, looking up at you.
you kiss ellie, and tell her “if you go to every one of my practices.”
safe to say there was never a practice ellie didn’t go to.
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midnightwriter21 · 1 year ago
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Hello :) please could I request headcanons of the hashira having a crush on a hashira!reader who’s very motherly to the younger demon slayers but shy and secretly craving affection from the other hashira 💙💙
demon slayer hcs: motherly hashira!reader x the hashira pt 1
characters: fem!reader x giyuu, rengoku, tengen, shinobu, kamaboko squad (mentioned)
AN: some of these are platonic instead of romantic.
pt. 2 with mitsuri, obanai, sanemi, and muichiro is HERE
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stop because i love this
you don't talk to the other hashira much
but its not because you don't like them!
they're just a little intimidating
and you want them to like you so bad
but what if you accidentally embarrass yourself in front of them
would be my biggest fear tbh
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GIYUU
this guy is just as shy as you are
awkward asf too
but seeing as you're one of the few hashira that are kind to him..
he really likes you
also really appreciates the way you take care of the younger slayers
especially the Kamado siblings
i mean he did literally put his life on the line for those two
you guys don't talk much when in each others company
really its more of a dead silence lmao
like thats a surprise at all lol
but he enjoys being in your presence
he thinks you have a very calming aura around you
and he never feels any hostility from you
if you guys are paired up on a mission?
my guy is glued to u
no way is a demon going to hurt someone as pure and kindhearted as u
not on giyuu's watch
even tho he's goin to be protective of u during missions
he knows that despite your sweet nature, ur a hell of a fighter
respects you sm
thinks of you as his only true friend within the corps
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RENGOKU
i can never get enough of him i swear
he absolutely adores you
goes out of his way to talk to you every chance he gets
ur all the way on the other side of the butterfly estate?
sunshine boy is hunting you down
ur on a mission a few miles away from his estate?
he's alrdy otw
also very oblivious
you get shy when he starts talking to you
maybe you start blushing
"oh are you sick? your face is all red. i hope you don't have a fever..."
and hes putting his hand on ur forehead to check ur temperature
if he touched me id faint
admires how you genuinely care for the younger slayers
the way you encourage them to get stronger
the way you help them train
the way you make sure they're eating and drinking enough
you remind him of his mother
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TENGEN
when him & his wives finally have children..
ur designated babysitter 100%
being the sound hashira he has a great sense of hearing
so he hears your interactions with the younger slayers
you're not afraid to talk to the kids
you comfort them. laugh with them, scold them, etc.
wonders why you act so differently in the presence of the hashira
makes it his mission to make you comfortable around him
u don't have to worry abt affection when tengen is concerned lol
compliments you 24/7
"you look very flashy today!"
"you are a great teacher!"
"You should become my 4th wife!"
no bc that lmfao ^
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SHINOBU
you two are very familiar with each other
it's very often that you're dragging inosuke or genya by the ear to the infirmary to be treated
mostly inosuke
so she is well aware of how motherly u can be
she's a regular witness to the many scoldings given out to the younger slayers
you also asked her to train you in basic first aid
your red face and stuttered words were so cute she acted like she couldn't understand you
just so you would repeat it
loves to tease you
nothing too bad!
and never mean!
just thinks you're so adorable
really appreciates when shes sent on missions and you help out in the infirmary
wants to be better friends with you
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n0phis · 2 years ago
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my finger hurts so bad i have a blister now BUT
FULL L’MANBURG LINEUP BAY BEEEEEEE
worm curseworm helped immeasurably with the headcanons and details! they r responsible for most of the wicked sick stuff here!!!! worm curseworm supremacy
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buckle in. this is gonna b a long one
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wilbur: does his best to keep his meticulous but he kept wiping his fucking hands on his pants while brewing and got Ingredience(tm) on them that wont come out. he wanted to add that kinda like… hierarchy shit to the sleeves but also was going off a vague memory of what he thought ranks look like and kinda bullshitted it all (why are the pips and chevrons combined man)
tommy: the one who sewed all this shit, he had a coat like wilburs but being Tommy (see; pants) absolutely wrecked it through roughhousing and Existing and finally pitched it. he made a replacement that was a little less fancy and more like tubbos but with SO much more red because it’s ‘sick as fuck wilbur shut the fuck up’.
eret: looks the most similar to wilbur’s (due to his maturity compared to tubbo/tommy/fundy and the amount of trust wilbur placed in him) save for a few things like the boots, collar, and length of the undercoat. INCREDIBLY pristine save for a slightly damaged lapel and concrete dust on the sleeves from working on the wall (since they were able to avoid a lot of the fighting). up until their betrayal, their ability to stay as regal and clean as they did was almost taken as a threat to everyone’s perception of wilbur as the leader of the revolution
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tubbo: dirty as fuck, torn as fuck from various escapades in caves and while gardening; he never wore other clothes for menial labour and shit hes goofy. loose on him with a very crumpled collar and lots of stitches for minor tears in the fabric.
fundy: he has little boy shoes he has little boy shoes his outfit is somewhat infantilizing canonically so thats a fun little nod to it! he is just as Rambunctious as tubbo and tommy but makes a much stronger effort to clean his clothes because he is very afraid of his father’s judgement. there are *very* slight dirt stains as a result that just will not come out. while his uniform was being made, he asked if he could get his more similar to his father rather than tubbo/tommy, hence the short tail while everything else looks like wilbur’s. ALSO loose on him, moreso at the start to give him room to grow into it
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niki & jack: they joined after the l’manburg war and so theirs are very fresh, with a slightly altered design (red underside vs gold, inverted colours on the sash and pants/shirt/collar) compared to the prior default and marginally more saturated colours as a sign of how crisp and new they are. straight lines to keep the sleeves visually interesting without signifying a wartime rank. both are fairly well fitted as tommy has honed his skills and has tubbo and niki to help
WHOOF. there we go!
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onejellyfishplease · 6 months ago
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@allmightyscroll-swag came up with an au idea of what if the turtles were Lou Jitsu (he never became Splinter in this au) and Big Mama's bio children.
So I was immediately inspired to draw some half human half Jorōgumo designs!
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Mikey (he/him) looks mostly human from the waist up, aside from the 4 eyes with yellow sclera (and the extra spider arms ig) But from the waist down hes alll spider baby!! Hes pretty half and half, at least compared to his siblings, though he cant produce any webs nor foes he have a poisonous bite he is still incredibly mystically powerful!
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Now onto the twins!! (he/him for Leo and he/they for Donnie)
Theyre much more human presenting than the other two. And look like mirror images of each other. On their more spidery side (the one with the multiple red eyes) they both have patterns that go down the entire length of that side of their body. They both also have light purple hair, just a few shades darker than the hair Big Mama has in her human form, though Leo dyes his.
They both can produce webbing, but not in the same way big mama can make hers, in that they cant spew it as an attack, but can produce it as a steady thread (theyre both awesome at sewing) from the roof of their mouths. They also both have a venomous bite.
They can basically pretend to be human if they cover the more spidery side if their face with hair (thats why they have it grown so long) And hide their extra arms in a hoodie or something.
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And finally we have Raph!! (he/she)
Clearly hes the most spider-like of his siblings, and his appearance often scares even yokai at first, and is often mistaken of an Oni. But have no doubt, she gives the BEST hugs ever!! He can spew webs just like Big Mama too, though her bite isnt as poisonous as the twin's, but has a stronger bite force.
Also this lad is BIG, almost as tall as big mama already! probably because hes afab, and female spiders are usually bigger than male spiders.
And of course, we need a family photo to finish this off:
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volturiprincess · 4 months ago
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You Kill Me (Pt 2.)
Caius Volturi x vamp female reader
Summary: The confrontation after part one. Warnings: Angst, foul language, mentions of sexual harassment, Caius' sinister side peeks (I think thats all?) A/N: FINALLY! Man it took a while but I mean I got writer's block with this one. I really wanted to dive a bit deep with this and I added a couple back and forth POV between reader and Caius (I almost added a Marcus POV but I changed my mind). Thank you to everyone who has been patient with this one-shot, I hope I did not disappoint. But as always...Enjoy💙 Word Count: 6k+ (My longest one so far)
(Here's Part 1)
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(This. Was. His. Era. Again Jamie did him justice🥰)
Recap….
We stood in silence, I wanted to say something but I didn't know what exactly. I must have been too deep in thought because when I looked up he was gone…..
Oh gosh. What have I done? Why didn't I just say something to him, anything really could have worked at that moment and maybe I would not of hurted him. I never wanted to hurt him in anyway, he’s my mate for fucks sake. Even if I'm still getting used to the idea of having him as my mate, or just being around vampire civilization again, I would never want to harm him. When I pushed him away the hurt his eyes reflected, hit me.
Why am I being so difficult with him? You would think finding your mate just clicks for one and everything in your life finally makes sense, you get a sense of being even but no I decided to just make this once in lifetime experience so complicated. I have been in communication with Carlisle of course via letters, and when I tell him about me and Caius, I can already picture him shaking his head in disappointment each time he reads my letters. He understands why I'm being like this but he finds it totallyunnecessary for me to act like this toward my own mate, he keeps telling me you only get one in this lifetime. 
I decided to head outside to the gardens, where I usually spend my alone time until I see Marcus there. It seems he was expecting me. 
“Hello Marcus, fancy seeing you here”
“I would say the same thing but we have matters to discuss, dear”
I guess Caius got to him already, even if Marcus never shows any sort of emotions, right now he's giving me the same look Carlisle would give me when I did something absurd. He motions for me to sit with him, which I join him instantly.
“I am already going to assume you know what I'm about to say?”
“I have a hunch of an idea”
I couldn't look at him because the look he's giving me was pure disappointment, I felt like a child being scolded by their parents. I know that feeling all too familiar, I was the ‘wild card' apparently compared to my brother when we were younger, father had a knack to always scold me even when it's something as little as forgetting to put away a cup. Carlisle had it easier compared to me, I was molded to be this lady that society would approve of, I was designed to be the perfect wife according to my father. Mother would have never wanted me to be raised like this, she was the one who encouraged me to read, she was even the one who taught me how until she passed away when me and Carlisle were 5. 
“Let’s start this off simple, how are you feeling?”
That is a very good question, how the fuck do I feel? Sure I feel confused, that's all I have been feeling since I found out about being mated to Caius but I mean I feel disgusted. I feel disgusted with myself, I heard stories over the years that the Volturi were supposedly these power hungry coven who are just ruthless but now I feel like I'm the true villain here. What kind of sick person– err vampire in this case– turns their back on someone who has been nothing but loving and patient with them? Caius, even if he has  been interesting with his tactics of showing affection, has only been patient with me, and how do I return the favor? I push him away and basically stomp on his heart.
“Terrible”
“Elaborate on that”
I really do feel like a kid currently.
“I feel terrible because I broke Caius heart” 
“And how?”
And now I feel like I'm in a therapy session.
“For months I turn away from our mate bond and refuse to give in, he does not deserve that, actually screw that he does not deserve a mate who just shuts him away for no reason”
“Oh but there is a reason to your uncalled behavior”
“Isn't there always a reason for everything?”
“Yes, which is why I'm asking you why are you being like this?”
“I dont know”
Of course I know why, I'm scared to give into the bond, what if I’m not good enough for him. What if I fuck up or something and he decides I'm not worth, that I'm not worthy in being his mate. I know you can't pick who your mate is or anything but he could do so much better than me, a person worthy enough to be his queen. Other than the fear, I'm angry. I've been forced to be here forever and don't even have the chance to see my brother. I miss him, he was all I had left of my family and now I have to be away from him. And my past trauma is always lingering.
“I doubt that”
“Marcus, no disrespect to you, but why are you invested in me and Caius? I know he's your brother and all but…why?”
I saw him look off to the distance, almost like I do on a daily basis when I'm reflecting on thoughts or events throughout the day. But I could see his expression change, instead of the disappointed look he had not that long ago, he looked gloomy which was his usual expression before I started to talk to him. 
“I told you about my…” I saw him take an unnecessary gulp ”late wife…Didyme,right?”
“Yes you did, she sounded like a lovely being, I would of loved to of meet her”
“She was, I mean she is. What i'm trying to say is I don't want to you or Caius to end up like me, I have had my brother in my life for so long and to see him finally find his mate, makes me surprisingly happy, I might not show it but internally I have a bit of peace”
Oh the guilt I have right now is no joke, the way he is speaking makes me worry more about the situation I created with his soul brother. The day he told me about Didyme was when I healed her favorite flower, he only told me a bit about her, her personality, features, how her smile could brighten any room, how with just a touch his worries and sadness would be like if it never existed. He truly loved her and the way he is barely going through life does make me sympathize for him big time. I actually make sure to check up on him at least once a day, from just asking him about the latest book he has read to just asking him to oversee my work in the garden, it's not much but I can see a bit of change in his eyes. 
“But I also do not want to see you suffer, I don't know what you are trying to accomplish with this behavior but you have become an important person to me. I view you as a sister I never had, makes me a bit envious of Carlisle since he has the honor to call you his actual sister.”
“Marcus I don't know what to say, I'll be honest with you but I view you as my brother as well, I see a bit of Carlisle in you”
“We are getting off topic but I appreciate your honesty dear, the point of this conversation is to come to your senses and accept Caius as your mate, I can see your bond with him weaken, you are doing nothing to nurture it, he was kind of trying but not in an effective way, in a way you two are acting like children, now if you will excuse me, I have matters to attend to”
He took off before I could even close my mouth at his revelation. He does make a point, I need to stop this ridiculous behavior I've been having and be willing to accept Caius as a mate. 
Caius POV
Humiliated. Disappointed. Defeated. Embarrassed. Furious. And Shameful. Who does she think she is? Was it perhaps my fault for pushing her and just throwing myself at her with that kiss? What was I thinking in doing such an action on her? I would never act like that or think to do it, I am a gentleman, I might not show it but I have never had no intentions to be this way. I still blame her. She is the one who has made me a whole different being. My brother has told me once you find your mate, everything just clicks, they are your equal side and they supposedly make you a better person. He’s wrong, since the minute I saw her I knew she would be trouble, I knew she would not be the right fit for me. 
How could she push me away like I was not worth anything. I have feelings. Wait? Do I? I never understood the purpose of expressing feelings. We feed on humans, I have no sympathy for them only that they keep my thirst down. But when I saw her, I felt the world stop, my main focus was on her and only her, not only because of her beauty but the aura she gave. I for once felt my unbeaten heart beat, I felt like I was suffocating from her scent, but at the same time I felt at ease. I still do not understand her purpose of being difficult with me, if I didn't spend our longest time together arguing with her I would've gotten answers to my questions.  
Maybe it is my fault as well, I have not been there for her. Marcus advised me to spend time with her to actually get to know her. He also warned me that I should be easy with her, she will never be able to see her family unless they come here. But what do I do instead? I basically seduced her with my charm and thought that would be enough to seal the bond. What an idiot I can be, but at the same time I at least tried to give into the bond, unlike her. She would just turn away from me and act like I was some low life, like a pest in a common sense. Who gave her the right to treat me in such a way? Maybe her brother was the one who influenced her to be this way with me? I knew that vegetarian vampire had it out for me, it only makes sense since he left, he probably knew she was my mate this whole time. 
She's such a child to top it off. Running away from a bond that is grander than any bond to existence, and yet she turns away from it like a coward. Just like her brother, always going on and off from having mortals or not. In the time she has been here, she is still not drinking human blood. I thought by now she would have converted to our diet but it would seem I was wrong. Another thing to add to my list of changes; being wrong. I have always been right and if someone goes against me then they will end up being sorry. She’s changing me more than I care to ever want.
Y/N POV
It's been a month since I last saw him, even before I would at least catch glimpses of him or he would approach me. He’s nowhere, I even asked some of the guards if they have seen him but I was met with disappointment. Not even Aro or Marcus have been any help, well I haven't actually talked to Aro yet, he still creeps me out. My mind has been rehearsing over and over in what I will say to Caius, it's all I can really think of.  And to think it's only a month, it has felt like an eternity, considering I have been around for a while now, it cannot compare to this month alone. I think I am finally losing it, I believe I am going mental now. The way my mind is being filled with endless thoughts and worries is really pushing me into a not so pretty mindset. I want to cry but I know I am unable to, I want to scream but what will that solve? I want to run away but Demetri would just track me down in an instant. I want to drown myself in books to at least distract my mind but I know whatever I read it would only be twisted and I would be thrown back to thinking about him. 
I even stopped  hunting, I haven't had not one ounce of blood since the last day I saw him. Why do I deserve to satisfy my thirst when I hurt my mate? Oh my mate, how much I am longing to be in his arms right now, telling him how sorry I am. To tell him what an idiot I have been this past half year, to tell him my fears of not being worthy of him, to tell him it's me and not him no matter how foolish that sounds. It's the truth there is nothing wrong with him, not even his anger issues bother me, on the contrary I love how he is not afraid to show his intense emotions out. Oh? I said the L word, well it's no issue to me because I think I do love him. How fucked up is that really? It took for him to stop coming up to me to finally realize I do have love for him.
I have been spending this whole month, when I was not looking for Caius, pacing in my room growing more and more mad. Not the emotion mad but like mentally losing it. But I think I am also mad, I mean I am trying to make it up to him but he won't even give me a chance. It's frustrating really. Oh no. Is this how Caius was when he was trying to seal the bond but I just turned away from him? Now I am really feeling the pain and guilt, this torment is just so painful for anyone to face. I made him go through this, I really am a monster.
I fell to my knees in defeat as I buried my face into my hands, the venom started to fill my eyes. All my walls started to crash down on me and I could feel myself almost physically hyperventilate as I was trying to remember to calm myself. I felt my old human self creep up. In my human years I would have my breakdowns after each lecture my father would give me. His talks about me being the ideal respectful woman would get to me too much.
His preaching never got easier, he even would force me to attend his social gatherings with other men so I could be viewed as an available choice as a wife. When my dad was not having an eye on me, those men would stare at me shamelessly, it made me feel gross and caused me to have a desire to be alone. Another reason why I avoided any type of civilization when me and Carlisle went our separate ways. 
Maybe that’s another reason why I was also being harsh toward Caius, I feared he was going to be like those men. It didn't  help his case to be proven wrong when he kissed me or the way he seduced me endless times. I need to talk to him. 
Caius POV
I feel foolish avoiding my own problems. I tend to get to the bottom of things but in this case it's different. How can I solve this? Wouldn’t it make sense for her to come up to me and apologize for her childish acts? The way she wouldn't even look me in the eye when I talked to her? Or how she would respond to me with a snarky remark? Gosh I think I love her attitude, even if she did hurt my feelings by rejecting me, I think I fell for her more each time I would approach her. But when she pushed me away, I noticed her attitude was true. Why would she want to be with a vampire who has the title of the ‘ruthless one’ out of the three? I never cared for what others think about me but with her, everything suddenly mattered. I wanted her to accept me for me.
My reputation means everything to me, I am the one who does not show mercy and I am the one to not give second chances. As for her, I would give her endless chances if it means she gets to be mine, only she can get her way with me. I would not let anyone know how her rejection has hit me, I would rather let my anger take over me to let others know she has no effect on me. Why is loving someone so hard? Love for me was always something I viewed as a weakness, look at me for merlin sake, I feel like being locked up in a room and refusing to be out and about. 
It is what I have been doing this past month, I been in my art room staring at a blank canvas. My muse, my inspiration, and my desire to create a masterpiece has left me. Before her I would decorate my walls with weekly original art from whatever came to my mind. And yet when she turned away, my yearning vanished like I drop my helpless dead meal fall to the ground after I drained them. 
A while ago I was painting her, I happened to decide to work outside on a little platform reserved for me only and I happened to spot her in the gardens. I never revealed myself to her but I had a perfect view of her staring off into the distance, the right lighting was even hitting her and the scenery around her was every artist's dream come true. 
I only got to sketch the background because I wanted to spend more time on just her. How she was posing unaware of my eyes on her, how her lips were slightly parted, how the wind picked up her hair slightly after each breeze. How her eyes held so much emotion while her other facial features stayed relaxed. She was and still is breathtaking to me. I could spend hours drawing different sketches of her if she were to let me, I even got an idea of a new statue to add in the gardens, it would be of her.
She’s like a reincarnation of Aphrodite, no I am mistaken she is more bewitching than the goddess herself. How have I gone a millennium's without witnessing such beauty in my life? I need her, she’s my missing muse. 
Y/N POV
When I was finally mentally composed enough I walked down one of the many hallways to head to the throne room. I have a feeling he might be there, I don't know where else he could be and nobody has told me about his whereabouts. I arrive hoping to see him there but only Marcus and Aro along with some of the guards who are within the shadows are there. I want to yell at them but I compose myself. 
“Aro, Marcus, where is he?”
Aro who as always tends to act unaware of things unless it is of interest to him decides to mess with me.
“Where’s who?”
“Look I have kept my patience for a while, but if you dare to test me today I will gladly knock you out again but this time it will be a month”
The hidden guards stepped out from the shadows after my little threat, already recognizing them I knew I could take them down. I was lucky that Jane and Alec were not around because my chances of winning would be low. 
“Why should we tell you where he is? Haven't you hurted him enough? I seen his thoughts I know the suffering you have put him through since your arrival”
I wanted to rip his head off so bad. How dare he meddle into mine and Caius' life? Soul brother or not, what me and Caius go through is our own business. I know he makes some sense about the suffering and pain but I have gone through my own pain also. Marcus settled a hand on Aro shoulder before I could think about attacking him
“Aro it is not our business to intercept into our brother and his mate's issues, my dear y/n he is in his art studio. Felix? Demetri? Would you mind taking her to his studio?”
They were both by my side and led me away. Good thing these two were taking me away, they are the only ones who would manage to stop me from attacking. It was a quick sprint and they nodded toward two large mahogany doors, it looked like it was indeed doors to an art room. It also seemed handcrafted, I had never seen such gorgeous details on a door before. I opened the door slowly to do a small peek into the room to see if he was there. He was there on a stool with a loose button up shirt that was open at the throat and he had some casual black slacks. His hair was a bit messy even and yet he was the most striking being I have ever seen in my lifetime. 
His gaze snapped at me as I was closing the door, his irises were matching his pupil from his lack of feeding. His eyes also matched mine, since I was also pushing away the need to feed. He watched my every move like a cat watches a mouse before pouncing on it.
“What do you want?”
“I-I I want to talk to you”
“Is that so? Took you a month to come to some senses did it?”
Well that hurt, I already knew he was going to be a bit sharp with his words yet that line hit me a bit hard.
Maybe this was a bad idea, maybe I still need time to be able to calmly talk to him. No, no keep yourself together y/n, I need to do this for not only my sake but for Caius.
“Well go on with it, I don't have all day”
“Look if you are going to start having an attitude with me then maybe we need to wait another day then to talk”
“I am not with attitude, I am just trying to get to the point, I don't like to dance around issues”
I took an unnecessary gulp like Carlisle would do when he would break bad news to me.
“I love you”
The pencil he had his hand fell to the ground and that was the only noise that was heard after my words. 
“I know you're probably thinking, how cruel can I be to say that after everything that has happened between us but it's the truth. It's always had love for you within me but I was scared to open that door, you see I wish we could turn back time and I could explain to you everything that has been going through my mind before that fateful day. I wanted to tell you something but you left before I could and-”
“Then explain to me why you have acted like a child”
His voice lost its sharpness, instead it was soft, the same softness his eyes reflected currently. I wanted to melt on the spot by how sweet he looked.
“Before I was turned, my father would display me like some doll to show others of my availability as a wife, when he was not looking the men he was presenting me to would basically undress me with there eyes, some of them would be brave enough and leave lingering touches on me after I would shake their hands, the only males in my life I trusted after that was Carlisle, even in my time when we were apart I was never near civilization, I feared for the day I would have to be around others.” He stood up from his stool but he stayed at a distance from me still.
“When I saw you I thought it was time to heal completely from my trauma, but with the way you would approach me it gave me slight flashbacks from the past, and it made me recoil from you a bit, but at the same time I wanted to be by your side. What didn't even help my case was I had a fear of not being enough for you. How can a vampire like me who has such fears be worthy of a king like you? You deserve someone who doesn't still feel an ick when she’s around others for too long. I felt if we were to talk sooner then we wouldn't be in this position but no you just did a quick and go, made me feel unworthy of your time even”
I wanted to say more but I decided to give Caius a space to talk also, I wrapped my arms around myself for comfort and looked away from him. I feel exposed and anxious just standing here in silence, waiting for him to say something. Please say something already.
“I was not expecting you to even start this with those words”
I knew it was strange to say that but I mean I wanted to reassure him I do have feelings for him.
“I think you make a great point in we should of had a civil conversation at the start of this to avoid our current issues, I-I apologize for my behavior, it was uncalled for and inappropriate of me to try to nurture our bond by seducing you in such a way, you should of been treated like a queen with respect and love. But you are wrong of not deserving me, on the contrary I feel like it's the opposite, you deserve someone better than me, after all the shit I put you through without knowing what you been through, Marcus advised me to be there for you and yet I was hardly there”
I felt my eyes fill with venom again but I was still not looking at him so he was not aware of how I was reacting to his declaration. 
“But at the same time I thought it was a bit foolish of you to try to back away from me, you should know from now on that when it comes to you, you can tell me whatever you want, no matter how harsh or straight forward your words might get, I can take it, you are my mate after all. I never want you to feel uncomfortable around me or feel the need to distance yourself from me either because I cannot bare being separated from you, incase you haven’t noticed I haven't been feeding lately either, much like I can see from your once glowing amber eyes that I manage to fall for, but back on topic we can work on your healing process together, no matter how long it takes we do have forever after all”
I looked up at him finally to be met with eyes filled with venom too. Not really having control over my mind or body I ran to him to pull him into a deep hug. His arms not thinking twice wrapped around me like if it were second nature to him. At that moment it felt as if our issues never existed and we were happy once again, so this is how Marcus felt with Didyme, now I understand why he was so worried for us. I would rather kill every being who dared to harm Caius in any way, than to see him suffer anymore than he needs. We fit perfectly into each other, it felt like we were molded into one another, it felt like home. I'm finally home in the arms of a man I can trust and…love. 
I looked up at him and gave his cheek a kiss. I was going to kiss his lips but decided to pull a Caius in this situation with a simple “Com tempo”. He smiled lazily at me at the sudden realization that I used the same two words he said to me a while back. 
“I'm willing to go into this bond fully, no more avoiding you because that only causes more harm for us. I don't want to be separated from you either because with all honesty the moment I saw your eyes I was enchanted by you, for a moment I saw a whole future with you and even though I was recoiling from you after each encounter with you, I couldn't help but fall for you a bit each time. Even that kiss made my stomach weirdly flip” 
He caressed my cheek with his thumb while his other arm was wrapped snugly around my waist as we was listening to me. Whereas my hands rested on his chest, I was trying very hard not to look at his exposed chest and or his collarbone, because even this small exposure of skin looked like art. 
“I vow to never become one of those filthy sorry excuses of men, if I could I would hunt them down one by one and drain them completely. No one will harm you, I would certainly never dream of creating such misery for you. But why don't we take some time to spend together and just get everything out. Hmm?”
“I would love that Caius”
He leaned in to give my forehead a tenderful kiss that would have woken Sleeping Beauty herself up. 
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Epilogue 
‘Dear Carlisle, 
As I write to you, me and Caius have come to be in a better position. We are spending more time together and we have brought up any miscommunication we failed to address from the beginning and solved them up one by one. We are at a point where I feel like we have known each other since the beginning of time. I never felt more at home since before mother passed. Caius really is my other half, we even spend hours in his art room, drawing whatever. He tends to create masterpieces of me being his muse. I even included a painting to this package I am sending of the painting I did from my garden here in Volterra.
I feel more comfortable around the others even, that ick I would tell you about is finally gone and I could spend hours with the guards who I have grown close to. I can never forget to tell you how whenever I talk to Marcus, I see a piece of you in him, I miss you so much but this is the closest I have to having you near me. I hope you and Esme plus the kids are doing well enough. Maybe soon enough we'll see each other, and tell Alice I forgive her, I now know her true intentions and I thank her”
Love y/n”
As Carlisle finished reading out loud the letter to Esme he smiled at the part of seeing his sister soon. But he did not forget to mention to Esme a ‘Finally” after realizing his sister is finally happy with her mate.
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hearts4werka · 3 months ago
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Starry Kiss
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Summary: you’ve always had a crush on your childhood best friend Chris but always thought your feelings were one-sided since he always had girls all over him and he could have anyone he wanted. One day you hosted a sleepover for your friends as well as Chris, night soon came and you two were the only ones awake and you go stargazing in the starry night where you confess your feelings to him and he responds with a genuine kiss you’ve always wanted to experience… Genre: FLUFF, childhood best friends, stargazing, sleepover, high school sweethearts, starry night, love confession, best friends to lovers, unexpected kiss & possibly more! Warnings: None! Just cutesy sweetheart best friends finally getting together!
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Me and Chris have been childhood best friends and I've always had a small crush on him but never thought my feelings were one-sided since he always had girls all over him and once I even had to help him with his first crush who became his first girlfriend who later turned out to be using him.
The poor guy was devastated after that and I had to be his personal therapist for almost two weeks after he got over her and found a new girl to thirst over, it ended up not being me.
I never was good at expressing my emotions since no one never asked unless it was evident something was wrong, only ever Chris saw through the fake smile I would put on everyday to hide the real emotions I would feel, that's one of the many reasons why I have a fat crush on him since childhood.
After school we walk together to my house or his then I would vent to him and show him the real me no one else saw besides him. We could talk and laugh together for hours on end, I always tried to somehow give him blank hints but too scared to actually confess since Im afrain of ruining our friendship I love so much and will cherish all of our moments together fondly.
| - 🍂 - |
One day I decided to host a sleepover for my friend group, including Chris and some of his guy friends since I know he wouldn't survive being around all of my girlfriends so of course I made an acception for him.
And I’m sure my friends won’t mind.
Chris was the first person to get there since he came in early to help me with preparing all of the stuff that needs to be set up.
While setting up the designated place to sleep we got into a small pillow fight…
• Before Everyone Arrived…
When I was arranging the pillows with Chris’s help, I suddenly felt something soft hit my back and chuckling behind me. Slowly turning for dramatic effect I see Chris burst out laughing and I know he threw the pillow at me.
His laughter is soon muffled by a pillow hitting his face, I soon followed with the chuckles and choked out through the laughter filling the air.
“Thats what you get!”
He immediately went into action and started to throw more pillows at me and I followed behind, throwing pillows at him that were in my reach. We soon started a pillow fight.
I grabbed one of the longer and bigger pillows, he looked at me and put his hand out like eleven while laughing.
“Don’t you even dare!” He speaks between chuckles as I take the risk and hit him with the big pillow in my hand.
“Oh you’re gonna regret doing that”
Suddenly he tackles me to the floor, ending up on top of me with both of us laughing and pillows flying all around, he drops down onto the floor next to me as we continue to laugh at the whole playful situation.
I would be lying if the altercation didn’t fluster me even in the slightest.
| - 🍂 - |
7:45 PM
As the time of the deadline for everyone to finally arrive, me and Chris are waiting by sitting on the couch a bit too close, my head laying down on his shoulder and a simple hand wrapped around my waist and pulling me closer to him.
The whole time I'm trying to hide the slight pink hue growing on my cheeks, its not the first time we sit in such position that could be taken as an intimate one.
My friends often tease me and say to just confess to him like its thats easy. I dont want to ruin our friendship as it could be the last type of friendship we get like this.
While we wait for the others to arrive, the doorbell finally rings indicating they have just arrived, I shoot up onto my feet and to the front door.
Chris follows behind as I open the door, on the other side there’s two girls, my best friend Kayla and Natalie, one guy whos Chris's standing with bags in hand, all being my friends.
I greet them and quickly let them inside, leading them upstairs into the guests bedroom where we’ll be all sleeping since there’s more room there for all of us.
They all put their bags away and we start the fun part of the sleepover...
| - 🍂 - |
10:54 PM
After a little adventure around the night town only illuminated by old street lamps and a snack trip to the store for a small horror marathon we finally got back to my house.
I place the bag of snacks on the coffee table in the living room as all of us gathered inside of the room to start the horror marathon.
All of us take a seat on the couch, the guys sit on one side of the couch and the girls in the other. Me and Chris are in the middle separating the gender groups created.
Grabbing the remote I open the first streaming service I land on, which landed on classic Netflix.
I begin to scroll through the ‘horror’ section, everyone talking among themselves and suggesting what we should watch first before we finally decide on ‘Fear Street’ which is a horror series with 3 movies.
We get comfortable in our spots and I play the movie, some grab snacks and some grab drinks and then the movie starts…
| - 🍂 - |
• After a Horror Movie Marathon
1:31 AM
After watching a god knows how much hours worth of horror movies everyone was finally starting to feel sleepy except for me and Chris for some reason.
“I’m tired…” Kayla yawns, making sluggish moves to get up from her spot on the couch. Everyone else agrees they’re also feeling tired and suggest we should already go to bed.
“Yeah we should go to bed already” Natalie suggests, slowly starting to get up as well to head to our designated sleeping place.
We all follow suite but when I try to get up, Chris decides it would be a funny idea to randomly throw we over his shoulder and carry me to our sleeping place.
I let out a quiet yelp as he throws me over his shoulder, his little giggles echoing through the room as the group looks at us a bit surprised but used to us acting like this with each other.
Trying to protest for him to put me down, sending small hits to his back as he continues to carry me and walk up the stairs with the group until we make it to the room.
He finally puts me down and I shoot him a playful glare which only fuels the stupid grin on his face, we enter the room after everyone and close the door behind us.
We make sure to not step on anyone before both of us got to our sleeping spot for the night and lay down, pulling the duvet over my body as the warmth of it surrounds my body but even with the warm feeling, I find myself not quite being able to fall asleep.
I pretend to sleep, closing my eyes to trick my brain into making me fall asleep but I just lay there conscious with my eyes closed and little did I know that Chris was having the same problem…
| - 🍂 - |
• Two Hours Later
3:09 AM
After a few hours I’m still laying there and staring at the ceiling while everyone’s shallow breathing fills the rooms air and hits my ears in a smooth melody.
A sudden quiet whisper and slight nudge on the shoulder taps me out of my small trance and I look towards the source of the noise.
“Hey, you awake?” I feel Chris’s warm breath hit my cold skin and send a small shiver running down my spine as he speaks.
“No, what’s up?” Answering his question I sit up on my bed and make some room for him to sit down as well so he doesn’t have to keep kneeling down on the hard wooden floor.
“I can’t quite fall asleep for some reason.” He confesses, taking the seat infront of me on the bed. It making a small indent and elevating my own seating from his weight overpowering mine.
“Me neither.” I agree, looking around the room I glance over at the window where the source of the moonlight that’s illuminating the room is coming from.
Noticing the especially starry night sky tonight I remember I was reading an article about that there was supposed to be a starry night.
I suddenly get an idea, since we can’t sleep and I wanted to go star gazing tonight anyway and might as well drag Chris along with me.
“It’s a pretty starry night tonight” I state the obvious before looking back at him and adding, “Wanna go star gazing?”
He glanced between me and the night sky and chuckles quietly then nods his head in agreement. “Yeah, sure”
A soft smile spreads across my face as he agrees and the thought of sitting on a hill with a perfect view of the starry night sky just enters my mind as I imagine the scenery.
We quietly get up from my bed and I grab a blanket on the way out of the room, slowly closing the door behind us than make our way towards the front door to sneak out of the dark house.
On our way down the stairs, Chris suddenly almost trips over something in the dark. Silently cursing under his breath as he out of reflex grabs the my arm and the railing, holding on for dear life to not face plant down the stairs.
I’m trying my hardest to not burst out laughing at his terrified expression at almost falling to his death and making a lot of noise when we’re supposed to be quiet.
Quickly making our way to the front door and almost exiting in a hurry to not wake the others up, I start to lead him to the spot I was thinking of that will have the best view of the sky.
“You gotta place in mind already, princess?” He finally asks in a hushed voice, leaning his head down to make me hear him better. The little nickname he always calls me whenever he wants to gauge a reaction out of me.
“You don’t remember? We used to always go there as kids!” I remind him also in a hushed voice as we walk under the beautiful night sky up a medium hill.
Seeing how his eyes widen in realization as the childhood memories flood both of our minds at once, a small smile growing on my face at the cute moments we’ve had there together.
“Ohh, yeah now I remember” He realizes, scratching the back of his neck in slight embarrassment for not remembering to which I give him a reassuring pat on the back.
We start to go down memory lane of all of the special moments we’ve shared over the past years of our constantly blooming friendship, knowing we’ll never be dumb little kids together anymore just makes my heart ache as I would love to go back in time and relive all of those memories.
Some memories brought laughter, sadness or embarrassment. When we finally made it onto the top of the hill, we were immediately met with an a amazing view of the starry night sky.
My lips fall in an inaudible gasp at how beautiful the scenery is, I look over at Chris and he’s in the same state of awe as I am.
The way the moonlight illuminates his facial features and his long brown strands ghosting over his forehead and slightly above his eyes makes my head go into a slight spiral.
Shaking my head and looking away from him to not cause a too much of a blush on my face than the slight staring has already caused.
A sudden idea comes to my mind, it’s the perfect time and place to confess my longing love for him. It may sound like a typical love story but who knows, he could still say no.
With that thought in my overthinking mind, I start to doubt my idea and bash it. It’s the right place but might not be the right time.
He notices me being lost in thought, my eyes darting over all of the stars on the sky as if I was tracing every possible pattern with them.
His face suddenly is placed infront of my vision, snapping me from the small world my mind had put me in and back to reality.
“Hey, you good?” He asks with concern lacing his tone, a shade of worry shading his features in the moonlight as his brows furrow.
I shake my head, a small embarrassed chuckle escaping past my lips to try and laugh off the situation to make it seem I’m fine. “Yeah I’m fine, just zoned out for a minute”
Him not fully believing me but just brushes off the worry for now, he casually drapes a hand over my shoulder in an almost comforting matter.
Leaning my head on his shoulder we start to walk around the hill to find our spot, soon enough we succeed at our search and lay our backs down on the grass.
We watch the stars, pointing out the constellations we notice the starts aligning to create. It was truly a beautiful sight to witness.
As we observe the starts, I try to get the courage to ask him the question I’ve been dreading to ask him for far too long now that I can’t keep it bottled inside anymore.
I sit up so suddenly a feeling of dizziness washes over me, he follows behind me and the same look of worry comes back to cast a shadow over his features.
“Are you sure you’re fine? Why did you sit up so suddenly?” He questions with concern now thick in his tone, raising an eyebrow at my current actions.
Taking a deep breath before the word vomit begins without my permission and I can’t get it to stop no matter how hard my brain screams at me to stop.
“I can’t keep this hidden anymore, sorry in advance but…” I pause for a second, contemplating my decision before my mouth grows a mind of its own and decides for me.
“I’m in love with you. And I-I am for years now but I was always scared to admit it because of all of the girlfriends you’ve had that were way prettier than I could ever be, I’m so sorry for keeping this from you when we promised to not keep secrets from each other and tell each other everything that’s on our mind…”
After my small ramble I grow out of breath and my breathing grows slightly heavy, looking up at him I see his expression is unreadable so my apologetic instinct switches on.
“I’m really sorry, I know you probably don’t feel the same way and might hate me after this. I’m sorry if this could ruin our friendship in any way and I don’t want it to, I’m so fucking so-“
My words suddenly get cut off by Chris grabbing ahold of my jaw and smashing his lips on mine, instantly shutting my moving mouth up.
I’m at a loss of all words that I wanted to speak in that moment, my mind becomes blurry as I melt completely into the kiss and slowly start to kiss him back.
The kiss feels magical, like taken out of a fairytale. Finally finding my Prince Charming or sharing a kiss that’ll save me and erase all of the problems I’ve ever encountered in my life.
When we finally pull away from each other, I look at him in complete shock but a hint of relief in my features is only visible if you look for it hard enough.
“Why did you do that?” I question, feeling confused by his actions since I was sure I would get rejected by him but am so glad I didn’t.
“To stop you from rambling all night long” He confesses the reason behind the unexpected kiss, a smile growing on his face as a reaction to my confused expression.
“I thought you would get weirded out and reject me.” I as well confess to the reason I’m so confused right now, the relief slowly becoming more noticeable on my face.
“It doesn’t matter now what I could have done, so don’t worry about that now” He answers, the smile growing on his face. His hand reaches and lands on my cheek, caressing it with his thumb in an almost loving way that makes a smile of my own form on my lips.
“You’re way to calm about this right now, it’s concerning” I slip out with a hint of joking in my voice to lighten the tense air surrounding us, we share a laugh together before his lips land on mine again. Both of us smilling into the kiss as we fall back onto the ground and share another passionate kiss under the starry night, almost like a starry kiss…
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@hearts4wertka
authors note: i’m so sorry that writing and posting fics has taken me a bit longer than expected but I don’t really have motivation or the drive to write so my head has been a bit empty lately, anyway thank you guys so much for the feedback on any of my fics I seriously really appreciate it and I love every single one of you! 💋
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gamblersdoll · 9 months ago
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PUT MY NAME ON IT, NOW IT DESIGNER 4
cw: pure smut, maybe heavy for some, fluff at the end.
“hak–!” you yelped, feeling the sting on your ass.
currently, you laid across his lap, naked and your ass bare. it was pretty red, almost bruised and practically hot. and it was in the same spot you were in. even though hakari was sitting back, practically manspreading, he had a wide lap.
“count the number or ill restart.” he threatened, rubbing your poor abused ass cheeks. you were given 25 slaps… and only on ten. that fucker knows he has thick and heavy hands.
“ten…” you said, how pitiful.
another slap, had you biting your lip and whimpering. “eleven!” you yelped again, feeling him rubbing his hand on your cheeks, giving you some form of relief. “baby please!”
“baby please.” he mocked back, slapping your ass again. “cmon babydoll, keep up.” he said, mockingly.
“twelve!!” you whined, squirming and kicking your feet slightly. only causing hakari to grow annoyed and yank you back, dragging his thick fingers up and down your puffy and soaked slit, exhaling as he felt his cock finally get a little thicker, too.
“fuck , mama…” he whispered in your ear, adding another digit to rub your slit. “pussy is practically droolin for me, huh?” he said tauntingly.
“is too much.. spanking too much..” you said, feeling and knowing that you have to wear loose clothes now, because your ass would be raw.
hakari flipped you on his lap, holding you while he kissed your cheeks stained with sweat and tears while rubbing circles on your puffy clit. it made your hips buck against his fingers.
“poor baby needing her pussy finger fucked, huh? how do you ask?” he said, making you look at him. he plunged a finger into your precious pussy, feeling how warm and juicy you were, you really hadnt had any action in a year? fuck he could tell why you always acted out, that bitch boy boyfriend couldnt put it on you.
“please..” you said, only able to muster that. how pathetic, because you were just talking big girl shit a couple minutes ago, what happened to that? you never knew. all you did know was that your was was raw and tingling , and hakari is like a personal oven at four hundred degrees right now.
“ill let it slide.” and he curled his fingers, only moving the tips of his fingers like he beckons your g spot to come to him. “so what are we gunna stop doin now..?” he whispered in your ear, feeling his body heat get even hotter.
“fuckfuckfuckfu-“ you said repeatedly, eyes threatening to roll back but only snapping back to hakari when he speaks. “not to- oh shit..– not to talk back– ha fuck!” you moaned out, legs trying to close back together until hakari separates them. he was always so big and strong, he just made you feel weak with him.
“yeah, baby. was talking all big and bad, and now look at you.” he said, with a hint of sass and rolling his eyes. he kisses on your neck, sucking so slightly and his fingers were vicious, faster than they were before. he felt something familiar , like he knew it was his fever coming hard, those fevers as if he was going to land a huge loan and win even bigger.
“i cumin! i cumin—!” you chanted, holding onto his beefy arm, hiding your face in it, trying to close your legs but for no avail, just to have hakari slam them open—
JACKPOT!
you came with a cry, body convulsing and the arch of your back could make him feral, feeling your walls spasm on his fingers as he rubbed your clit in circles and sucked on your neglected tits. you finally caught your breath after some cooing and praises from him, along the lines of “good fuckin girls” or “thats my girl, thats it.”
you tried to close your legs, until he slotted himself between you as you lay on your back.
“uh uh, i ain done with this pussy yet.” he said, freeing his cock and him hissing at the cool air. he rubbed your hips, to at least ease your body before he fucked you. your body was so fuckin pretty, he just doesn’t understand how you havent been touched in a year.
he kisses your plump lips, biting so softly and low growls coming from him. he kisses your neck, down to your collarbone, to your chest and your mounds.. your stomach, and your little tummy where your poor uterus was. he puts his forehead against yours, as he slides the fat of his cock in.
holy fuck did you not forget that.
you both had a small moan, remembering when you both were younger and fucked on the daily, at most three to four times a day. he wasnt even in all the way.
“pussy remembers who fucks it the best, already clamping down on my cock and im barely all the way in.” he snickered , looking down at you. “you wan me to show you where it is, mama?” you nodded.
“okay babydoll, this right here…” he slightly pulls his hips back, and slams it back into you, watching you throw your head back and moan so loud. “is your cervix.” he says, thrusting slower and moans a bit, trying to not get too crazy with it since he basically had to take your virginity back. “fuck you feel too good..” he whines.
“fuckohmygoddaddy–“ you whimper, gripping his shoulder with your nails and biting your lip, barely able to keep your thighs apart. you feel hakari kiss on your neck, groaning whenever he thrusts faster and hits that gummy spot. “oh shit..!”
“there you go.. take all that dick im givin you..” he said, moving your attention back to him. he looks you in your eyes as he thrusts, trying to maintain eye contact. only for him to fail and roll his eyes back. “huuuuuhhh fuck!” he groans out, pressing his forehead against yours and have some combination of thrusting and grinding together, drawing a whine from you.
“kin!—“ you moan out, coming on his cock, rolling your eyes back as your toes curl. the convulsions of your pretty pussy pushes hakari more to his climax, his hips thrusting into you faster with vigorous motion and him growing desperate was apparent.
“fucken fuck!” he shouts, pulling out and jerking himself until he feels his seed spurt out on your tummy, a little on your breasts, and just barely your chin.
you were barely conscious at this point, only just regaining consciousness and feeling a warm rag on your soft tummy, causing you to flinch.
“relax.. its just me ma.” he says, cleaning your body and wiping your pussy down ever so gently. youre so glad you taught him how to wipe you. “imma get you some clothes and im gunna take you to get some food.” he says, already half dressed.
you nod, getting a sip of your now room temperature water and sipping it. “ can we also go to wally world?” and both of you start grinning.
“oh shit!” you whisper, running into aisle h after you were just in l. walmart was your wally world, and you both always act a damn fool.
“y/n!” hakari laughs, trying his best to hold it in and holding you. “oh youre a fuckin moron.” he laughs, kissing your forehead several times. both of you being in the toy slash athletic department, looking at whatever to play when you made it back to your apartment.
you pick up a random toy, looks electronic and it somehow turns on, startling you and you throw it back and it makes a loud “CLANK!” hakari bursts into a laughing fit, as you walk away, pretending you dont know what just happened. hakari comes up behind you, hugging you from behind as he towers over you and kisses you.
“get off!” you say, because hes a giant and youre little, and hes heavy. you giggle, holding him back.
“not in a million years, babydoll.” he says, using his finger to tilt your head up and kiss you. “lets get some banquet and call it a night?” he says, raising an eyebrow. you know exactly what hes talkng about, causing you to swat at him.
“fuckin up my day!” you say, mocking that one tiktok sound and you both made it home by at least eleven fourteen at night, crashing on the couch.
hope you guys enjoyed this one… i opened up a can of worms.
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illumalux · 8 months ago
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Life Series Victors as Tarot Cards
A presentation on why we’ve got it all wrong when it comes to grouping life series victors.
This post will continue on with the implication that ZombieCleo is a Victor, simply because she is. She won real life, therefore she's a victor. Argue with the wall.
Now, I see your celestial trio of the first three winners. This should never change. This feels the most apt, it centers perfectly, and each of the things it represents are present in multiple different categories. Obviously in space, as everyone has adapted to, but also in a Minecraft world, and what I see as more important: in a tarot deck.
Think about it this way.
The Watchers, in whatever form you think they (or we) take, are collecting these Victors. Each one means a different thing, survived a different landscape. While I understand the celestial motif of the first three Victors, and how it fits into their characters, I would argue that many others are far too grounded for that.
It’s a collection, remember? What is better for assembling a set than a deck of cards? Especially ones that meddle in Fate, something the Watchers seem to adore.
So here are the cards each Victor represents, with card meaning and my defense as well. This will go in chronological order of the seasons.
Before I continue, I just want to give a disclaimer. Every tarot deck has a slightly different explanation for what each card means. The definitions I use are a mix of three of my decks and the official Rider-Waite-Smith deck's explanation, so if there are inconsistencies with what your deck says or what you know, please don't come for me.
Grian, Third Life:
XIX. The Sun
Beyond the obvious desert motifs (a whole extra post in and of itself), the Sun is representative of not only Grian's gameplay, but also how the Watchers (those collecting this deck) feel about him. Grian is one of them, so he naturally starts out in their good graces, with a greater level of respect.
Rider-Waite-Smith defines the card as one of success. Of course the Watchers will gloat when their baby wins. Even if he wasn't meant to, it did inevitably mean that throughout his game, Grian was inarguably one of the largest sources of negative emotions, second only to the Red Army. Again. Extra post on its own. When he won, it saved anyone the satisfaction that might negate their negativity, alongside the delicious outpouring of grief that was the final duel of Third Life.
Reversed, the Sun is a card of depression. As I just touched on, one of the most defining moments of Grian's game was his final victory. When the ending came down to himself or his greatest ally, he went about it in the way that caused probably the most pain to both parties involved. It pushed him to the very brink, ending in him defining his own ending just moments after winning.
Scott, Last Life:
XVII. The Star
Even ignoring the starborne origins and headcanons, as well as the crown of stars included in his skin (Void below, these posts write themselves) this one looks like a super simple explanation, but actually requires me pointing out something that may not be obvious to some Watchers: Scott, in every game and Iteration has made it a point to rebel against the rules in whatever way he can. I could go into full detail, but thats a lot of words and I don't need anyoen to get bored. (Void, this series and side tangents that require other posts)
In third life, a game about death and destruction, and the originator of factions, Scott took a very different route: he got married and built a house in a flower field. When grief finally found him, he refused to give the Watchers any satisfaction, literally crystalizing his grief into a part of his character design (and one that would remain for two to three more seasons, depending on your thoughts on the coral pieces). In Last Life, he is the singular person in all five seasons (technically two, but shhh this is more dramatic) to withstand the Boogeyman curse, something the Watchers installed purposefully to make people kill allies. Double Life, obviously, as Scott rejecting the soulmate the Watchers gave him. Limited life, in which kills gave more time, Scott did not die a single time without giving life freely, either to an ally or a temporary ally.
That got long. Anyways. Scott's game has always been one of hope, spreading positivity and refusing to be pushed around by the Watchers. And that's exactly what the Star means. Upright, this is a card about hope and perseverence, pushing through challenges, which is exactly what Scott does. He refuses to let the Watchers' actions upset him and continues to play the game for his friends and for the future and nothing else.
Even reversed it still fits. Reversed, the Star means loss or abandonment. I've already used up too much time on Scott here, so I'll let you pick your favorite instance of that.
Pearl, Double Life:
XVIII. The Moon
This one is far and away the easiest. Like the previous two Victors, Pearl's story connected her with her symbol even before she won. But blood moons and wolf packs aside (as that's a whole different post for a whole different day) when you take a look at the definitions provided, it becomes even clearer.
The Moon is a card of transformation and change, as well as revealing one's inner self. Rider-Waite-Smith attributes hidden enemies, darkness, and terror with The Moon. While I'll happily analyze every single one of Pearl's actions as the Scarlet Pearl, I think this one is plenty self explanatory. After her rejection early on in the game, she immediately isolates herself and latches onto the night motifs, leaning in to what everyone expects her to be.
The reversed meanings also explain Pearl's arc in Double Life perfectly: confusion, mixed messages, and disbelief. This perfectly encapsulates Pearl's feelings at the very beginning of the game via her rejection by Scott and subsequent abandonment by Martyn in an attempt to get back into Cleo's good graces. Her instinctual reaction is one of shock, not understanding why Scott would choose to pick a soulmate when she was right in front of him.
Martyn, Limited Life:
XVI. The Tower
One of my favorite cards, the Tower is instantly recognizable. While most of my analyses aren't about how the card looks, I feel like it's important to share this time around. The most common image consists of a tower and one or both of two elements: lightning, and people falling. As a card, it represents sudden change, destruction, and chaos.
If anyone here is not yet convinced that I'm correct, please go rewatch Martyn's last LimLife episode, then come back and argue.
You're back? Great. We agree? No? Fine, I'll explain.
This fixates mainly on his winning game, but I'll touch on the rest of his games as well. LimLife ended with a huge betrayal on Martyn's part, one characterized by being so insanely sudden. (Of course it's the Watchers meddling. But the Tower isn't always about your own choices being your downfall.) He quite literally snapped as if hit by lightning (see description of the card), and this spells the beginning of the end for him.
Similarly, in all of his other games, Martyn finds himself with one pivotal moment that spells his downfall. The Red King, Betrayal at the Southlands (and honestly his worst move in DL was abandoning Pearl to try and beg for Cleo's forgiveness).
Funny enough, the reversed meaning of this card is almost a perfect match. I don't think this needs too much more explaining.
Scar, Secret Life:
X. The Wheel of Fortune
I adore Scar in these games. Every single season seems absolutely plagued by chaos. The worst season, obviously, was the one in which he gained his crown. Poor guy was just trying to make friends, and it seemed like every new secret was the exact opposite of what he wanted.
The Wheel is just what it sounds like: it's the card of luck, destiny, and fate. I won't add a new paragraph for the reversed meaning here either, as it means the exact same thing as upright, but with negative connotations in the form of bad luck and misfortune.
Scar is plagued by the whims of luck left and right. It seems like, more than any other player, Scar is unable (whether by others, fate, Watchers, what have you) to take full control of his own story and take actions that he wants to take, instead limited to where the current takes him.
But in the end, that chaos is what gives him his win. The lack of alliances and freedom that the game forced on him was what eventually lead him to be unmoored and able to volley his pain wherever he wanted, leading to a mostly painless win.
Cleo, Real Life:
XIII. Death
A little on the nose, I know, but which of these choices aren't? For a series entirely based on improv, there are a stupid amount of coincidences present.
Now, I know this is far and away the shortest series, so I'm going to analyse Cleo as a player across all of her seasons, not just her winning game. Sorry Real Life. You should have been longer.
While the meaning of the Death card may seem obvious, it's twofold in actuality. In some historical decks, even, the card is instead named Rebirth. I know how ironic that is that the zombie is the one who stands for death and rebirth, but again. Blame the stupid narrative, not the poor me trying to make sense of it.
In what my lovely mutual Honor called "phoenix behavior", I'm going to focus specifically on her deaths and rebirths, specifically BigB's betrayal in LastLife. Cleo takes her death hard, as anyone might. But her rebirth comes with change. The minute she respawns, it's with a different understanding of the world around her. She immediately embraces the change that has been given to her, burning down the Fairy Fort and ditching her alliance for a new one.
The reverse captures Cleo as a character over her seasons better than anyone on this list. While the upright meaning of the card is change, reversed it signifies stagnancy, obsession, and immobility. This can be seen almost perfectly with her thoughts on alliances. Scott remains forever in her good books, even over the course fo multiple seasons, simply because he has never wronged her. Even when they aren't direct allies,she still cooperates with him whenever, simply because she retains her previous feelings about him. The same can be said for BigB, but in the opposite direction. From the moment of the betrayal onwards, she refuses to trust him, going so far as to warn Pearl away from allying with him in LimLife.
Bonus: Jimmy Solidarity, the Canary
XII. The Hanged Man
But Moon! you shout, throwing your complimentary bucket of popcorn at me. Jimmy isn't a Victor! He's the exact opposite!
Yep.
That's why he's so soggy and why he goes on this list. You wanna argue that he doesn't have the same lore impact as a Victor? Too bad. Can't hear you. Jimmy gets his own card.
Initially, I was kinda sad that I already used the Tower, because that's the portent of doom and gloom or whatever, perfect for a canary. But then I spied an even better, even more Jimmy card.
The Hanged Man is the card of sacrifice. While I could go on a whole rant about the Fool's journey and how it is represented in the Life Series, that is Extra Tumblr Post Number IDK Anymore. Instead, today I'm going to stick to the basics. To specify sacrifice, the card doesn't just mean giving up. It signifies self sacrifice specifically. And what is Jimmy if not a semi-willing first sacrifice to get the chaos rolling?
How many times has he gone out to stop his friends from being the one who has to herald the change? The canary knows that he will sing the final notes, but so long as he can ensure the miners don't have to, he will descend once more.
Conclusion:
Now. Did I spend more time on this post than I ever did on an English Lit essay? Maybe. But as much as I love the space motifs this fandom has, I fundamentally disagree when we get to the latter winners. Come on, guys. Tarot decks are right here.
If I missed anything, or I misrepresented a player's game, please tell me. I can't be everywhere at once, and I'm always happy to learn more about some of the players I don't watch as regularly.
Anyways, this was way more fun to write than I expected. If anyone wants to see me give cards to the rest of the players who have yet to win, or an analysis of anything a mentioned in my tangents, please let me know.
Special thanks to @honorsongs who kept me company through this whole process and gave me many a suggestion when I lost my train of thought.
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sideblogdotjpeg · 3 months ago
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hi everyone im really really normal isnt it really cool and normal that sol held onto this little metal name plate like it was the most precious thing he owned and carried it around with him all the time, even as a synth knight soldier, a little metal plate that had his name "solum" and was the only thing that tied him to who he is and where he comes from. "this is the only thing i had when i came to the waterpark, just this word". just one half of the plate. how did he know "bufo" was his last name? how did he know that metal plate was his? how did he know? when sol almost dies in king of dragons he dreams of a swamp that hes never been to. and its cool and normal that sol carries fragments of a person hes never been around with him forever, a history and a family and a context of what he is he doesnt even understand, that is and isnt his
and isnt it really cool and normal that sol was an abandoned and forgotten nobody in the waterpark, and then he was brought to launchpad and told he *was* somebody, he was an extension of another person, its boy wizard *and* frog pal, "familiars always smell like he person they work with", and then "the gloves are not the same i dont know whats going on what am i what am i", and then "humanoid animals are often viewed as cute by other humanoids and could be used to perpetuate mothership propaganda", and then "why clone me im just a frog im nobody", and. the memories of childhood and sense of identity that launchpad and the synth knight program offered him crumbled down overnight. hes not a synth knight and he was never a frog pal and if hes not mothership than what is he outside of that? except the kicker is that he *was* mothership, more than anyone else; "theres always the consideration that you were made in a mothership lab". that he is just an extension and a copy of somebody else.
and its so cool and normal that sol, from the very beginning, an unnamed desire that alexandrite tapped into, that almost lost him to the network, "you... could find my family? ... i have a few things id like to say to them for sure". sol finds out hes a clone and one of the first things he says was "i think that mightve been the closest thing to a dad ill ever have". brad and bron. sol wants to know swag so bad, he wants to impress him, he wants swag to like him. he practices in front of a mirror meeting him. when they finally meet face to face all sol can say is "i hate the fact that you exist". and still he fights so hard for swag. swag exists and sol is two of a kind now. sol doesnt know what he is anymore. sol sees flashes of clones at the edges of his vision. this is as close to a family as he can get. and swag was a wanderer who wanted to see the world outside his home, but sol was always looking *for* his home. sol fought for swag, but at the end of the day. swag daniels the ship of theseus. "what happens to the people who were trying to transport that got replaced by alexandrite? where does that matter go? / it disappears". "youll always be a part of me, you *are* me, how can i let you go?". sol bufos spore network, a representation of who he is, someone defined by his connections and bonds to other people. and thats the thing that ends up saving that last fragment of swag who survived, and kept on fighting to stay as the original sol bufo. swag still never got to take sol to moonstone .
anyway. cool and fun. sol bufo frog with the most twisted and mangled sense of self in the whole entire world. sol bufo who thinks of himself in terms of other people, who was by design an extension of someone else. sol who fought so hard for the family he just found out he has, and loses it in an instant. sol bufo who keeps on asking "who am i". "no matter what, you are solum bufo. and you are a good frog"
so. im normal about it
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livvidaloca · 1 year ago
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what!? liv made human designs for the watterson family again!? yes, she did, and here’s her train of thought for these under the cut:
so, these are actually for my fic that i’m writing on ao3 in which gumball finds himself transported to another universe in which everyone is a human after the events of the inquisition. this is why there’s very few animal traits on any of them, or magically colored anime hair. i wanted them to look like people who could exist and walk around.
in this, nicole is blasian and richard is a white latino (with frankie being white non-latino and jojo being latina). (also these headcanons were based on a lot of convos with some of my friends back in the day, i don’t remember anyone’s reasonings for these but they’ve been true for so long in my brain) gumball and anais are mixed, and i tried to nod to gumball taking more after nicole and anais taking more after richard without making them carbon copies. and then darwin of course is black thats just canon
as for their designs themselves, i’ll start with nicole. i tried to make her look decently muscular (although the simplistic style i used doesn’t exactly show it off). her blue bandana and shoes are obviously a nod to her canon design, so she doesn’t look like an entirely different character. as for her hairstyle i looked into relatively low-maintenance styles, since she’s a busy woman! and her hair is starting to gray from all that STRESS!
richard’s design is the most straightforward, yet it took me the longest because i was never satisfied with how it was turning out. i’m still not sure if i’m crazy about it. all i know is that i was dead set on making him bald, since there’s literally a whole episode about that. I didn’t commit all the way because the design without any hair was making me lose my mind. i gave him some freckles as a nod to his whiskers because they’re a lot more prominent than nicole’s (which is why she doesn’t have any). this also translated to gumball’s design. also, how could i ignore the obvious choice and not give him pink bunny slippers!? it fits him so well!
gumball was fairly easy for me, because i kinda always have human designs for him in mind. i always give him those blue sneakers because duh, and i always give him dyed-blue hair that he visibly doesn’t maintain. i always had this human-version-only headcanon that gumball BEGGED to dye his hair for the longest time, and nicole finally allowed it on the condition that he’d keep up with it on his own. he didn’t. classic gumball
darwin’s design is also usually an easy one for me. big orange hoodie, green shorts and sneakers. this time i also made the decision to have his hair tied up to resemble his little fin. it’s not really visible with their clothes and stuff blocking the original sketch, but i also tried to make his legs a little bit lankier than gumball’s, just to make them appear longer like they are in the show.
as for anais, i always have trouble nailing the design without it looking like a completely different character. i cant dye her hair pink, because she’s supposed to be four, but i also can’t give her pink shoes, because she’s of course the only one who actually has shoes! then i remembered ribbons and my day was saved. still not sure if i’m completely sold on her design yet, though. i think she looks a little older than four.
anyways, i’m planning on doing other designs like these with other characters! let me know if you’re interested. as for that fic, here’s the link:
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judec4ptor · 6 months ago
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happy pride everybody!! i made a redesign of the clone high characters (consider this a redesign of these designs as well)
EDIT: I FORGOT ABOUT ABE'S BEARD!!!! SO THERE IT IS, THAT'S WHY IN THE CLOSE-UP IT'S NOT THERE, SORRY FOR THAT!!!
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five hours of drawing and drawing for this... sigh...
below are headcanons and perhaps some explanations of the redesign⬇️ :>
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Joan... it's hard to give her a headcanon about her sexuality but i think shes questioning!!
joan has a precious stone in her necklace, harriet gave it to her as a gift for her friendship!!!
her bracelet was given by frida (maybe harriet and frida like to give things to their friends idk)
and thats it !!
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JFK!! hes bisexual lmfao!! for me, he started to question himself after the chapter where joan pretends to be a boy, and then in the present he already realized that... well, he liked both
I gave him a sweatshirt, since in most series, movies, etc, jocks wear them ;p
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harriet!! she (like joan) is questioning her sexuality lmfao
i gave her a vest because... well, there's no explanation, I just thought it would look good on her
and yes, i made her a little chubbier because that's my headcanon lololo!!!!
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confucius!! hes a transman and pansexual :)
not much to add beyond his slightly different clothes and hair
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cleo... she is a lesbian, as I believe her relationships with men never worked out and were only for interest, while with frida it is different
my headcanon is that in the 2000's she used to straighten her hair, and nowadays she leaves it curly :3
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abe... oh abe i love him!! (in season 3 he was meh sorry) he is a closet bisexual (he has a lot to think about) and uh has a weird friendship/enemies with topher
as you can see, he shares a bracelet with someone... but with who??🤔🤔
EDIT: OH GOD I JUST REMEMBERED THAT ABE HAS A RACCOON TAIL!!
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FRIDA!!! shes a lesbian and (maybe) she is within the non-binary spectrum
I can't add much either, in the original image you can see that I changed her clothes a bit lfmao!! the paint stains on her pants are now patches, as I think she tore a lot of her pants because of her skateboard tricks
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AND FINALLY THE LAST ONE... TOPHER!! hes gay (duh)
in the first season of the reboot he is in denial, in the new season I feel that he has more accepted his sexuality
I can't add much either hehe!! i just change his clothes and stuff
and yes, he shares a bracelet with abe :3 (they have been wearing that bracelet since before THAT, but they do not want to take it off)
and thats it😭😭
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ganondoodle · 5 months ago
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(elden ring DLC spoilers)
i fucking love Radahn so much, what i wouldnt give to meet ACTUAL him, he just gets toyed with and exploited so cruelly, you never really get to know him or what he wants im hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh so normal :)
like i know theres little to go by with typical fromsoft lore and stuff but agreeing to marry miquelly feels so ... not radahn like, why would he have fought malenia and then even after gettign the rot refuse to die if he wanted that .... also didnt he believe in the golden order?? miquella wanted to replace it basically????-
even his 'new' design feels like some idealized version of him that miquella dreamed up, theres significant differences in whats left of radahn in the main game and i feel like even that is an important detail (the braids ... i braids are IMPORTANT IM TELLING YOU-) like it .... to some degrees looks ..almost cheap, like an action figure (what the hell are all those sword things on his belt?? he has his two giant blades that dont go in that??? he would never use a different one?? whats it doing here??) (also the fact that leonard is missing .... like sure we like to over emphasize some character quirks but i also feel like thats and important thing- leonard clearly meant alot to him and he had him still with him when he was fighting malenia and stayed together even after rotting away)
what really REALLY makes me so very "normal" about everything is that radahn remains voiceless and has no say in anythign the entire time we meet him, hes either a zombie or a literally flesh puppet constructed by his own half brother (out of another family member, which clearly shows bc hes using blood magic and got horns growing)- aside from very few quotes on some items we never get to know him, we dont know what he wanted, he gets dragged into this and is then like some animated statue, theres no emotion in his face, even less sound he makes when fighting, even, in my opinion, his animation in the final DLC fight seem OFF to me- it looks stiff how hes moving whenever hes not actively attacking
(also miquella and what he wants is constantly talked about, but while its all about radahn in a way . we never hear anything from radahns side, its never even questioned. as far as i know, like !!!!! argh!!!)
(edit: also also the fact that in this puppet version of the design changes arent just the armor, his skin is different color too, even in the trailer when he fights malenia- BEFORE the rot- he seemed sort of ashy- greyish dark, even if hard to tell with color tint- his hair much longer in og now much shorter and in braids, his armor less practical and more show offy, he doesnt have a bow, even his swords look different, AND MOST IMPORTANTLY his weird anatomy he seems to have in og that i think is from renalla is gone too- AND yes i know his body is constructed from moghs there- which makes this all so much worse bc almost all that was him is stripped away and twisted into what miquella wants from him, second phase its almost all light attacks tooo- ok im stopping this now)
i know it might seem like im just making excuses bc i cant handle my favorite character agreeing to marry his own half brother- BUT I DONT CARE- HE DIDNT WANT IT- WE DONT KNOW WHAT HE WANTS- WE NEVER GET TO ASK HIM- HE NEVER GETS TO SPEAK AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASDJKBHKFJBGSKBVGFHDKBFKABKBA
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fearthedancer · 1 year ago
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Ok can i be completely honest right now? This fandom has a huge issue. A huge whitewashing issue.
Now before you say: "Oh but legos dont have races! Thats why theyre yellow!!" You dont only need skin color to imply a characters ethnic background. You can also do that with the characters other features like hair, eyes, lips or even stuff like their name. And thats exactly what dreamzzz does.
The most common characters i see whitewashed are Zoey and Logan. I absolutely NEVER see Zoey drawn black, even tho 1. She has twists (which some people draw them as just a side shave) and 2. Her last name is Okoro, indicating she could be igbo.
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As with Logan it goes a bit deeper than that. As the issue takes two forms: 1. When its him being drawn white and 2. When its him being drawn asian, but extremely pale.
First, him being drawn white is obviously an issue because he is canonically asian. His last name is Chan (a surname with chinese origin), he is voiced by Vincent Tong and he is designed to look visibly asian.
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(And before anyone says its eyeliner i found another character with the exact same eye print)
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People often draw him slightly tan with eurocentric features and call him asian. Who the fuck are you deceiving.
Now with the pale issue: this is also an issue i see around in the ninjago fandom. East asian characters liked by the fandom are drawn to appeal to the beauty standards while the ones hated by the fandom are drawn like actual east asian people. Altough Logan is the only east asian character in the show that we currently know of, this does apply to him. And him being pale wouldnt even make sense! He is a soccer and baseball player! That kid plays in the sun for hours!
And Logan isnt even the only asian character that constantly gets whitewashed. Take a look at fanart of Nova! If i didnt tell you, you probaly wouldnt even know shes south asian! In her insomniac club shorts its revealed her last name is Patel, an indian surname btw, yet i dont see ANYONE give a fuck cause i only see white Nova everywhere.
And yes! Mateo and Izzy are also victims of this aswell! Mateo's locs are never drawn right and i see people draw him like 1 shade darker than the others and call him black 😭. Izzie is white washed aswell and sometimes, only her and NOT MATEO?? HUH??? They are siblings 😭😭
Anyways, the moment the fandom actually learns how to depict the characters, we will finally be free.
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lizaluvsthis · 1 year ago
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HERES MY OWN SMG3 DESIGN FOR COFFE N BOMBS AU!
(I hope you guys love it)
I tried my best to think of his design- heres what you need to know :)
Also thanks to @shygirl4991 we're working on with the Coffee bomb au :>
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From my most basic concept design some of the colors were changed and the other designs were different for Three's model design to have. It's difficult when you work on your own designs for that, nevertheless the final was just right.
Basic Designs:
Blood red colored hat with the signature logo of coffee n bombs in the top hat (it glows in the dark but it's red)
He wears a lilac color buttoned up dress shirt
The cuffs from the gloves are supposed to be dark purple, with a roman numeral III that has the color red. And his main gloves are supposed to be grey color than just white
The sleeves of the dress shirt are supposed to be rolled up
His left wrist is seen to have a black covered bandage for some reason (if you know? You know.)
It was supposed to be a spiked bracelet than a watch
He is supposed to have those tiny burn marks from his cheek, and small slice of those visible scars from his neck and his left ear.
Final designs:
He canonically wears a bun and makes Smg4 think that he doesnt have long hair (he never shows it to him) thats why everytime he puts a hat on
The rope color is blue (its Smg4's color but four doesnt know that)
He has the logo design printed on top of his hat (you can barely see it) that logo also glows in the dark
His white gloves glow in the dark instead of his roman numeral III
He has a scar from his right eye, he got it during the event from WOTFI 2021 (smg0's possession to axol)
His necktie is black (three dark grey purple stripes from the end) with also a skull (signature from the usual hat he wears) the skull glows in the dark as well
His shoe design were hard to put on.. anyway- it has Terrence's bowtie from the side of his shoes
NOT TO MENTION HE ALSO HAS MATCHING 3 BEANS WITH SMG4!!!
HELP IM SORRY HE LOOKS LIKE PURPLE GUY FROM FNAF T.T
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uninformedartist · 1 year ago
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So just finished watching the ep so review. Spoils ahead:
So the episode was ok to me, solid 6/10 one of the better episodes which since this was supposed to be an "extravagant" ep why does it got better quality than the main eps, idk Viv has her moments like this ep and other eps its a train wreck in writing ect.
Mammon worked on my nerves, from design to his movements, personality ALL of him was annoying, which props for an annoying Villian but its Villian I never want to see back again and he's hinted for some sort of return.
Side tangent: Mammon is like the how many-ith Villian to get a return ep/hint at one. It was 1st cherubs, then dorks, then stella/ice twink, striker/crimson now Mammon & according to the leaked storyboards a ghost guy that tries to talk IMP into off-ing themselves... its a flipping lot and cherubs & dorks seem to be forgotten dispite dorks knowing & having hard evidence they exist, flip Viv chill it with your Villian of the week cos its way too many now.
Anyway, Blitz didn't need to be in this ep besides the flashback. Ozzie got him to talk Fizz out of being Mammon's puppet but ultimately Ozzie spoke him out of it & gave him courage to quit/confront Mammon. Even Blitz being a bodyguard/killing people for Fizz could've been any imp. Blitz is starting to feel like Steven from SU, in every ep even tho the ep doesn't need him/ the episode surrounds topics a wee child shouldn't be in (i.e Lapis trauma dumping on Steven & he a child isn't really equipped to handle that situation).
My fave part of this ep was Ozzie and Fizz. Ya'll I legit prayed Viv wouldn't mess these two up and my prayers were answered. Absolutely a joy these two were. Fizz especially what a darling. Loved that small scenes with him and the deaf imp child, l dont know sign language but it looked genuine animated and was just sweet moments.
From their interactions, Fizz's panic attacks/self doubt felt & were genuine... I felt that as someone that has panic attacks from high stress on my studies/life. It was just handled well. Fizz feeling less than and needing to prove himself from 1. his past 2. his appearance, that accident affected his self image/worth so much (why I felt him forgiving Blitz was too hastily done but I digress) & 3. him doing this Mammon contest still to gain/earn Ozzie's love for him cos Fizz believes Ozzie only sticks around because of this fame Mammon gave Fizz. Ozzie finally saying what he loves about Fizz was lovely, wanted that in the 1st ep but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. Their song was... I didn't like it BUT the message in it was beautiful. Lastly Fizz saying fuck you to Mammon from the courage/strength Ozzie gave him was a nice send off... also Ozzie saying he loves Fizz ah ngl that made me smile agh I just love them. I want to see them more than the Stolitz show but thats only a wish. Props Viv, you get 1 brownie point not messing this up.
Last findings, the ep was bloated as hell my soul Viv please stop cramming so much in an ep, this one is 30 mins long & yet still felt bloated. Pacing was a motherfuka damn it was bad & the swearing was jarring (its a Viv written ep I don't expect any less but still gonna point it out) and the comedy wasn't so prominent in this ep, Blitz/Mammon gave some comic relief but in the best and worst ways:
The way the VA delivered this line "to be fucked" made me laugh, the line is cringy but the delivery lol gold
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Aand Blitz, my soul shut the fuck up & get out this ep. Last ep & this one he said something so agonizingly cringe I pulled my face
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The world of HB is legit American hell or earth just painted red since Fizz named all these places in America just "hellified" where his fans come from.
And very last, congratulations Salem glad you got the cathartic send off you deserve from working under Viv, truly fuck you "Mammon" indeed :) also glad they credited you this time.
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