#i needed to draw something to get out of art block
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happy solvermas
#cause t. no actually if christ is the son of god and the solver is god then it'd be like uzimas#quick sketch i pulled out of my ass yesterday to see if i could get myself out of art block/burnout/whatever ive got going on#v was added after cause i had no idea how to work her into the scene#implied nuziv or something look man im just desperate about this ship#and i dont know how to draw fluff or whatever#im so bad at romance i dont know how to express it#but i've been desperately trying to draw nuziv for the past months#i think this is actually like some of my best linework yet im really satisfied with everything right now#been a long time since i've felt that#turns out the “stop overthinking every pixel of the expressions and just draw the approximation the audience will get the jist” approach wo#ks#something something n is the star of their life. tree light chrismtas#it is taking. All of my restraint right now#to not be So Mean to all of you#You Don't Even Know#I Could Do Something. I Might Still.#art#murder drones#murder drones uzi#uzi doorman#murder drones n#serial designation n#murder drones v#serial designation v#murder drones cyn#i need liam to explain whether cyn and the solver are the same person already so i can tag them appropriately its driving me nuts#oh yeah cyn got a plush core to chew on by the way#the idea of giving her a chew toy was rolling around in my head and i think its a very funny visual so here we are
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looo at my lawyer dawg im going to jail
#this is soooo bad Omg sorry#i needed to draw something to get out of art block#rwby#ruby rose#neon katt#neon red rwby#my art
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Class got canceled so I drew while zoning out to music with the extra free time
#ralsei#deltarune#ms paint#doodles#when my art block hits hard enough sometimes i just need to put the fancy programs away#forget about large projects#and just scribble#i draw the same ralsei over and over and i realize that#but its something i can draw while my brain is being stretched thin in other areas right now#that being said i do try to do something new every time i draw him so i dont get tired of him#i took what i learned from doing maomaos eyes the other day and applied it here#turns out all that you need to fix uncanny anatomical issues is a little perspective... literally#and then the glasses highlights covered all of that fun linework up lmao#haha you'll just have to trust that its under there
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Worstguy evar
#oc#original character#sketch#doodle#pareidolia tag#oc: freddie#kind of in an art block momence rn (crying)#dis was made out of desparation to draw Something yesterday at least. Ermmm#illustration#i need to get back in the GROOVE!!!!!!!!#ive been writing scenes with freddie lately and he is just so worst but i love writing guys who are worst. its very fun
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been missing death note lately
close ups under the cut!
#num draws#death note#death note mikami#death note l#death note misa#l lawliet#misa amane#teru mikami#death note fanart#fanart#digital art#was gonna add light but i didnt like the drawing so he got scrapped oopsies#idk why mikami’s pic is so large#i tried something new? i liked it#trying to get out of art block#so here we are!#theyre all a bit wonky but im honestly pretty happy#for someone who has been into death note for years i only just started drawing any of the characters 💀#i miss death note#i need to rewatch
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front/back of a bookmark i made for my program's bookmark design competition
#top 3 get 25 bucks and i need all the money i can get in this expensiveass city tbh lol#if nothing else tho it hopefully(???) got me out of my art block funk#if you Really tried ig you could guesstimate what school this is for. but that'd be weird. don't be weird#my art#grad school#artists on tumblr#mlis#the theme i was going for was sorta like 'information getting passed down through different eras of technology' something like that#last person is a semi-self portrait of my 'working in the rare books archives vault' days. good times.#also my drawing tablet literally died when i was 80 percent done with this. most of the coloring was like me doing finger painting JESUS
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an encounter between two newly anthro’d wc ocs
+ just my emo girl
#kiwifae draws#my ocs#goshawk#snowcap#technically#warrior cats#this is the first piece i’ve drawn in actual months#i needed something new and apparently anthros was the key to actually have fun drawing for the first time in a long time#furry art#cat furry#hey if you see this and like this i’d really appreciate a like/reblog#a compliment would literally make my day#not to beg for attention but lately i’ve been posting and getting literally zero response and while i ultimately do art for my own joy#it’s also. really fucking discouraging to put something out and have absolutely no one even interact when i know how many ppl it goes out t#even a like makes me smile. and even one reblog helps spread my art#just knowing ppl are at least seeing the work i put a lot of effort into is really nice and support definitely helps with my art block#luv y’all 💕
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DECEMBER 20TH!!
#anabeth chase#percy jackson#pjo#I haven't even watched the trailer yet but then the next thing I know I started sketching THEM#sorry grover next time my dude 🙏#my art#I just needed to draw something other than jjk... or anime to get me out of art block
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i usually dread rendering backgrounds sooo much but something snapped inside of me after looking at beautifully painted stucky fanart that i locked in immediately... 😭🔥
#𝜗𝜚 rambles#and NOW i'm nervous to draw the actual person... 😭#HELP... i guess i really just needed to draw something not human to get out of my art block 😭😭😭
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I hate my mood swings wtf is wrong with me 😭
#I'm going through something man but if you asked me what it is i wouldn't even be able to tell#i just feel like garbageeeee#idk i feel like all my passion for everything is gone -_-#if it turns out it was just art block im suing#but i feel so bad I can't draw n i hate everything i just need to sleep it's so late ugh#idk whenever i get like this i never remember what it's like to even be happy idk man i know i was fine even today#but i don't remember -_-#ughghgggghg#vent#👍
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I swear why are half the things i like/fandoms im in made of mostly younger people while the other half are mostly older people? what are the zoggin odds with that?
How it feels being 20 in a fandom with a bunch of 30-40 somethings.
VS how it feels being 20 in a fandom with a bunch of 14-17 somethings.
like am do i just have extremely odd luck with things i like or is this just what being 20 is like?
#I go browse homestuck twitter and find out an artist I like is turning 16. I go to warhammer twitter and see a meme poster I enjoy is almost#three times my age.#like how do you get a person to somehow feel too old to be in a one fandom yet too young to be in the another?#i know this sounds stupid but it happens every time i like something#world of warcraft has people who have been playing this game for as long as i have been alive#despite aging with the game minecraft is primarily youngsters#team fortress 2 is somehow both too young and too old a fanbase#i've long since reconciled with the fact pretty much everything i like is over a decade old but why cant i just like something with a ->#similar age base? like it would be nice to interact with people that like similar things i like on a consistent basis.#I don't want to buzz around my 2 friends ears trying to not talk too much about my interests. Don't get me wrong I love those two gits but-#its not like i can complain about those childish gits who kept blocking the good fishing nodes in world of warcraft#I cant share my homestuck art and make references to characters that they don't know#I like making references! references make up roughly 1/3rd my jokes! Heck they make up my zogging dialogue too!#HECK I SAY ZOG AND GIT BECAUSE I AM A BLOODY STUPID MIMIC! I'M NOT EVEN BRITISH I LIVE IN MASSACHUSETTS!#YET EVERY TIME I GET A NEW “main interest” OR WHATEVER I END UP TAKING IN ZOGGIN SPEECH PATTERNS FROM THE DANG THINGS!#I ONCE MUTTERED “merde” WHEN THINGS WENT WRONG FOR LIKE OVER A YEAR BECAUSE SPY SAID IT AND ONLY STOPPED WHEN MY BILINGUAL AND FRENCH TAKIN#FATHER AND BROTHER RESPECTIVELY TOLD ME IT MEANT SHIT#I SAY “SLAPS ME ON THE KNEE” AND “SUCKS ON ICE” BECAUSE OF A MAIN INTEREST!#MY POSTURE GOT BETTER SOLELY BECAUSE I DID NOTHING BUT LEVEL A ZANDALARI HUNTER UNTIL LEVEL 120.#WHEN LAUGHING A MODERATE AMOUNT I DO THE /LOL ORC EMOTE. WHEN CHUCKLING I PUT MY HAND ON MY MOUTH LIKE SHIVER FROM SPLATOON BLOODY 3!!!#I HAVE BEEN UNINTENTIONALLY MIMICKING THINGS I LIKE FOR YEARS! I BOB MY HEAD AND WALK DIGITIGRADE BECAUSE I HEARD BIRDS/DINOSAURS DO IT TO-#BALANCE WHEN WALKING. AND THE ONLY REASON I SUCKED AT RUNNING WAS BECAUSE WHEN I WAS YOUNGER I WATCHED A SCENE OF ICE AGE WHERE SID WAS WAL#ING AND MIMICKED HOW HE WALKED FOOT -> FOOT INSTEAD OF HEEL -> TOE HEEL -> TOE#AND NOW I GUESS I'M JUST WAITING FOR WHAT ILL GET FROM HOMESTUCK HUH#ugh if you can't tell this is a midnight brainrot post. i may be awake and on my computer but this still has the energy of that kind of pos#saturday warhammer and the following wendys browsing for ya folks.#midnight brainrot#Man i needed to get those off my chest#not like anyone reads these midnight brainrot posts anyways#oh yeah gotta tag art and paint.net so i can easily find these drawings later if i need them
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#. having some struggles with art lately#like I'm struggling with Making The Art y'know??#it's not art block because i HAVE the ideas and the desire to draw but i just. can't#i don't know if it's stress or my bones shifting weird or just being tired or what but Something is keeping me from drawing what i want#when i do draw something it doesn't turn out looking good and other times i can't force myself to draw at all#which really sucks because I'm on a time limit for a lot of art!#I've been trying to work on Artfight for ages‚ a zine I've been waiting MONTHS for applications to open‚ making stickers for my DnD group!#all of those have very specific time limits and i just! can't! get! myself! to! draw!!!!!!#i might delete this later i just needed. some way to vent it out#this didn't turn out how i wanted either but that's sorta the point lol#idk. just feeling really stressed out about it i guess#vent#vent art#three eyed cats in my living room
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GAAHAHHHHH
#venting in the tags#maybe its just past darkness and the Bad Thoughts which i shouldnt listen to are clouding my brain too much#but i feel so fucking weird and inadequate over everything rn#im unable to work on drawings as i usually would have and its kinda plaguing everything which it should like yeah i love drawing but#i cant let just one aspect of me ruin everything. right? the fact that i havent been able to draw as well as i usually can should make me#feel sick to the stomach and unsure about everything i do but it happening and i hate it.#plus i got the ipad id saved up from the comms to buy and its fun and nice and all and maybe i just need more practice with it but i feel#like im not able to draw on it even more? and i spent the whole day trying to get used to it but its just not as good?? and then when i went#back to the no screen wacom i couldnt get a hang of it becuase idek its just not happening#and also the fucking art block wants me dead i swear i want to draw so bad and i have so many ideas but the moment i start anything its just#crumbles down into nothingness and i hate everything i do and gods fuck i want to cry but i can because there are people at home and#usually im a big 'crybaby' when im at home but i dont fucjing wanna be like that anymore like i can handly my shit myself im fine.#i dont need to just fuckinf cry abiut it becuase thats not gonna fox anything but also i feel like crying might just make me feel better#but then id have to hear shit from my family and i know theyre just teasing in a /pos way but i dont wanna fucking deal with that#plus my brother iust talking to him os annoying sometimes like he talks about things so condescendingly and fucking hel dude shut#the fuck up i dont need you telling me that my art is something people can 'just do' and the fact that i was able to get the ipad#'basically for free since i got that money from the little drawings i make' as if they dont fucking mean anything to you like#shut the fucking fuck up dude i worked hard on those and even though i dont like my own shit sometimes i still fucking work hard on those#fuck you you bitch#i think a lot of things are just piling up and i need to sleep#tomorrow will be a new dawn and a fresh start and maybe ill hate myself less#ps. note to anyone reading the tags#im fine i just needed to yell out and express my frustration a bit. some sleep will help surely.
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we have an especially bad migraine where I noticed us getting aura (mostly being pissed off and upset in a specific way) for several hours before it started and we've taken pain meds but I'm not sure they've actually helped. they have definitely given us side effects though and I feel very spaced out and nauseous and generally shit.
we've also had way worse ADHD symptoms for the last few days to the point of being pretty much unable to focus on anything besides like 2 things we've hyperfixated on. we've had so much trouble starting tasks and keep struggling to hold a train of thought or focus long enough to even figure out what we need to do each day despite having all our Habitica dailies to tell us.
our brain is all over the place and I'm not really sure what to do with it or what would help but it's just occurred to me that sometimes our ADHD gets really bad in the buildup to some of our worst migraines and now I'm just hoping that both the migraine and other shit ease off soon because I'd like to be able to function
#personal#thoughts#🍬 post#vent post#posts made on pain meds#I've spent like 6 hours drawing today because we fixated on one piece of art that I originally started as a joke#but I probably had other tasks to do and I don't know what any of them were and I tried very hard to at least make a list or something#but just could not hold a coherent train of thought and got really overwhelmed every time I tried to think of stuff I needed to do#so I gave up after a while because I realised my options were to keep trying and failing and just get upset and start dissociating#and end up doing absolutely nothing while feeling really bad#or just go ahead and draw for as long as I can handle because our brain's fixated on it and at least I'd be doing something#and it's also nice to actually be able to work on art for any length of time after having such bad art block so far this year#oh I did also shower shortly after we woke up which was our main big task of the day I think so that's something to be proud of#our tourette's has been bad and that made it surprisingly difficult and it was kind of stressful and exhausting but we did it#it's also just occurred to me that our tourette's and ADHD and a few other issues have all flared up together#followed by a particularly bad migraine which is a pattern we keep noticing and first noticed back in December#and all these issues are known to involve dopamine but I can't figure out what exactly is going on#when it happens we also start getting sensory overload way more easily
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#venting in this blog as it has less than 100 followers but#it makes me so sad to see some corners of the tolkien fandom feel like#they have to resort to AI “art” to depict their characters#ive observed some used to pay for loads of commissions and now its all AI#i get that its free and that people would rather not draw if they feel they dont have the talent for it#its a chore for me too sometimes i get it!!#and then they post it on various art and fic sites and im like#shaking them by their shoulders pleading for them to stop#if you need to use it for help with character design when your hand isnt skilled enough to like#siiighhh i get that ok fine#but then just use it as a reference and try your hand at it#i complain sometimes when im doing art but it really is a thing of beauty and inner peace when you can make something with#your own hand#even if its bad to some peoples eyes! but then you gain the valuable skill of blocking out the haters
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you can probably easily tie my mental state at any given moment to how much ive drawn in that same period
#in this case. not at all since the year started and god it feels awful#i miss drawing........ no matter how much i really want to nothing rly comes out its getting dire#i cant tell if its art block or burnout or a bit of both but its really doing a number on me#even that animatic i made an effort to start i didnt get past one section im in agony#and i need to start prepping my portfolio for college apps also..........#its really been a new kind of downright terrible lately im really getting tired of crying myself to sleep every other night#grasping at straws and constantly distracting myself with manga or sudoku and thats been going absolutely swell#ngapain gw masih hidup juga ya#gk mau mati tapi dari kemarin juga udah ngerasa kayak zombi aja hidup begini#sighhhhhhhhhhh#duck rants about something
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