#i need testosterone
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fuck... even though i got my injection at the right time i feel angry and like ive been stabbed in the guts. its hard to walk
#why does this happen#i shouldn't be bleeding if im supposedly not injured#tw period#surely this is just a bizarre mutation that happened at some point in human history#no animal benefits from bleeding everywhere and being in too much pain to move#and when it happens to me...#it feels unnatural#this should not happen#my body is violating me#im trapped in a womans body#everytime this happens i barely get out alive#tw suicide#before my medication for it#it was just a monthly suicide attempt#i have panic attacks every time#its not worth living if my body is going to force me into womanhood#i know im a man#but i still feel trapped in this body#i need surgery#i need testosterone#i need a male body#oh god my chest is swollen too#i feel mutilated by puberty#thats the only word to describe how i feel
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HEHEHE HOWS IT FEEL TO BE THE MOST HIMBO OUT OF ALL US ????/aff
SCREAMING CRYING 😭
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hhnngg....i wan...t.....testosterone........ooöuugh..
#uvoidrants#ftm#i NEED testosterone#ok so 10 pounds of testosterone#18 poungs of mints#n 7 tranmds gener stripers#but make sure none of em are white i cant see the t on them if they r
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Daisuke having a high pitched voice gives me gender europhia
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I want to be a bear sooooo bad
Let me be a bear
I would look sooo good, pretty and hairy and strong and chubby and hot. But I'm literally 155cm tall and hairless, and people just think I'm a fat girl (not like there is anything wrong with that, but I'm not one). I just want to go into a gay bar and make people sweat a bit because my luscious tummy hair is showing from my crop top, and I look like I could bench press them. Is that too much to ask for
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wanna sleep but in too much pain aughhhhhhh. i deserve to be tucked in and kissed on the forehead. maybe even given a snack.
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forgot what it felt like to sit back and watch your body slip away from you via dysphoria... my voice is already softening and i can access almost all my original falsetto
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in the mood to steal testosterone just because I don’t wanna hear my voice anymore. Fucking hate speaking
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[ID: Drawings of Martin Blackwood from The Magnus Archives on gray backgrounds. He is a fat white man with freckles, dull red hair with white streaks, and a matching beard. His eyes are a pale gray.
The first image is two headshots of him making a disappointed expression. He is wearing round glasses and a white collared shirt. The first drawing shows him with his hair down in a mullet style, bangs falling over his eyes, and the second shows his hair slicked back with only a couple strands hanging down.
The second image is a full-body drawing of him in a three-piece suit. It is a very dull blue. He is also wearing matching shoes and a pale gray tie, and his glasses are drawn gold. He also has a gold chain hanging from his vest pocket. He is standing with one hand in his pocket, the other adjusting his jacket. His hair is slicked back, and he is looking over his shoulder with a neutral expression.
The last image is just Martin's eyes over the seasons. Seasons 1-3 (one drawing) are a rich brown, and his eyebrows are bright red. The expression is wide and friendly. Season 4's pair is a pale gray with pupils frosted over, and the eyebrows are the duller red. The expression is tired. Season 5's are the rich brown with bright red brows, but with a ring of gray around just the pupil of the eye. The expression is annoyed, eyes rolling. end ID]
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finally finished the lonely martos. enjoy his hairline
#fg's art#the magnus archives#tma#martin blackwood#i feel like i need to recede it More especially in the middle#he jokes that testosterone gave him all that body hair but it had to take it from his hairline#also the hairline isn't. strictly a lonely thing btw. he's been like this the whole time#it's not a symbol of his deterioration it's just How He Is
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The interesting thing about medically transitioning is how you might just be treated with the wrong framework.
When I get my hormone levels checked, for instance, they check it against the wrong type of person, so everything is flagged. Did you know that testosterone encourages hemoglobin production? Well, my hemoglobin is perfectly in line with male levels, but my levels are checked for the wrong endocrine system. Before I realized this, I was really confused as to why my hemoglobin was two grams over the range given, and was confused as to why that happened, and worried about if I should be worried about that. But it was a normal consequence of my testosterone levels, which are also flagged though they are well-within the range that is typical for my age and health categories.
The way we treat and measure for trans people and trans patients will affect the treatment and education they receive. There are ways in which hormones especially can influence how one's body operates, and with that in mind, you also have to change the way you interact with a trans person. With my testosterone levels, if you were to measure them against the incorrect endocrine system, you would fail to treat me in reality - that being the way my body has changed and maintained homeostasis since being on T.
#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#mtf#nonbinary#trans medicine#i still need to get my levels checked but i've been busy#but since going on T they have been very satisfactory#like even going 'they should go on assigned sex' wouldn't work for somebody like me.#like. i am still on testosterone. and it's changed me and my body. therefore the way i am treated and measured ought to reflect that#hemoglobin is a fun word to say though. try it. say it. out loud. say it (are you afraid.)#i use myself again as an example because i think that experience perfectly encapsulates my frustrations
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Okay but why does Viktor look like an Ultrakill Mannequin?
#Trans Masc vs Trans Fem#arcane#viktor arcane#arcane season 2 spoilers#arcane s2 spoilers#arcane spoilers#arcane season 2#Ultrakill#pickle posts#Testosterone isnt enough I need to become Viktor
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i love you testosterone i love you voice cracks i love you bass notes i love you loud laugh i love you fuzzy mustache i love you whispy patchy beard i love you bushy eyebrows i love you hairy stomach i love you knuckle and hand hair i love you boy smell i love you bottom growth i love you new orgasms i love you big nose i love you square jaw i love you squishy stomach i love you thighs that touch i love you stretch marks i love you acne i love you acne scars i love you body heat i love you appetite i love you mood stability i love you balanced hormone cycle i love you puberty awkwardness i love you uncertainty i love you adjustment i love you transformation i love you change i love you maturation i love you growth i love you freedom i love you euphoria i love you comfort i love you familiarity i love you recognition i love you second chances i love you masculinization i love you embodied manhood i love you testosterone
#in case anyone needed a reminder that testosterone is magic and no one gets to talk shit about it around me#and to be clear all of these are very specific to my personal experience being on t#these are all things that t either gave me or increased/exaggerated in me#just my own personal love letter to the last 10 months#i was going to make a more typical post for this account#but i was scrolling through some tags i use to find posts on here#and so many of the posts were people shitting on us not people who care about us#every time i go into those tags there seems to be more and more negativity toward us from people who dont want us to talk about our lives#i was even looking in positivity tags and finding assholes#and im tired of thinking about negative things now so instead you get this#transmasc positivity#trans man positivity#testosterone positivity
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the day my body hair stops getting thicker i will be ending it all btw
#testosterone please. i need more#i’m hairy but i want to be furry and i think my chest hair has a ways to go
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v1 gives the most painful t shot ever, asked to leave hell
continuation of this sketch
#ultrakill#gabriel ultrakill#v1 ultrakill#ultrakill v1#ultrakill gabriel#ultrakill fanart#ultrakill art#gabv1el#v1/gabriel#cw syringe#artists on tumblr#radio's art#my art#i need a robot partner that gives me my testosterone#(projects onto these idiots)#hello lgbt community#im really not happy with the proportions of his chest but i could not spend more time on this stupid lil sketch
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