#i must find where they are coming from
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Someday I will manipulate tumblr into revealing the Edgar Allan Poe meme community, but for now I can only hear them through the floorboards or scratching at the inside of sealed tombs.
#y'all are so funny#why do you hide your face from me#every so often an amontillado or telltale heart reference crosses my dash#i must find where they are coming from#memes#funny#edgar allan poe#the raven#the cask of amontillado#the tell tale heart
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What would you do if you saw an alternate version of yourself cry?
#HUGHUGHUGHUGHUG-!!#Simon deserves a fcking hug aight#but also i just really wanted to draw em sad looking XD#but i also really want them to hug so#fionna and cake#adventure time#simon petrikov#the winter king#winter king#winterkov#but the platonic kind#edit: WHERE DID YOU ALL COME FROM?! HOW DID U FIND ME-#Well thanks for making this get to 300 even getting 200 was hard for me XD#y'all must really like them hugs
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the relationship between the chantry and the mortalitasi in nevarra is SO fucking funny. the carefully politic and civil syncretism of it all. the ‘I’ll refrain from scratching your back to bloody shreds if you refrain from scratching mine :)’. left hand politely averting its eyes from whatever the fuck the right hand is doing merrily up to its elbow in entrails because it usually knows what it’s doing I guess. speak softly, and have an army of the restless dead ready to go banapants horrorshow bonkers if you don’t get to tend to them. We Receive: being able to keep doing our goth thing mostly unimpeded. You receive: us not raising the great majority to protest your unwelcome meddling. render unto the chantry what is the chantry's and unto the watchers what is theirs (or, with all possible courtesy you understand, else…)
#dragon age#nevarra#mortalitasi#a watcher's work is never done#The maker may take the souls but someone still has to care for the graves#the necropolis is such a trump card for the nevarran mages when you think about it -- try to annul the mortalitasi?#soon you'll have some VERY unpleasant things starting to come up from underground and no one who knows how to deal with it#that place has grown and been built upon itself for like a thousand years at this point hope you're good with surprises with no guide#it's not grey wardens in a blight levels of immunity granted but it's up there. thedas realpolitik hits different idk what to tell you#the idea that the ‘higher dead’ are the original souls lingering after death must be getting spicily close to heresy right#even more so than the mortalitasi usually get I mean#Poor Cassandra. Imagine being born a jock among goth nerds no wonder the religion got to her#if her parents had lived she could have been a hotheated dashing noble getting in righteous duels but instead. her uncle. alas.#I jest but I really am so interested in seeing more of nevarra to understand even more of where she's coming from originally#I'm visiting my wife's folks for the first time I'm really excited :) (I do think my adaar would find it fascinating actually so. sry cass)
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i think its some of damiens responsiblity to think what kinda relationship he cultivaded with his fans. and why is centering his need for explaning, defending and further protecting his self/image is his knee jerk reaction. unless you do those things a social media break is just another way of image management. plus it wont feel better when you come back and you are still centering your image which causes you too act defensive/childish. you cant support things thru acts of fear and nervousness and not expact them to crumble! i know people joked abour his virtue signalling in the past, and they are jokes, but its a curious thing people notice that around him enough to point that out. i hope he can actually look into that part of himself with a more honest critical lense.also these twitch stream where he wants this magicaly ''positive'' enviroment where people can ''escape'' is just unrealistic at best. this is a livestream where people rush on each other to talk to you. its by nature feeding into these things im afraidi positivity is not the warm blanket you think it is, its more of a trap lol
#some thoughts#blocking fans in general is a very emotional but stupid move lol(to me) as a somewhat public figure he must understand that block feature i#practically useless to him other than get his frustration out maybe for a minute? then what?#it only creates a snowball effect.#idk its feels counterproductive altho i can still understand where the frustration is coming from#stan twitter can be nasty. getting cussed by 17 year old with no emotional regulation and too much time lol#anyways this is absolutely not about him having the perfect response/apology.. that'll happen and idc about pr managing his reactions lol#also personally i dont find the joke much of a big deal. its whatever. lazy lowblow at worst#he just needs to be realistic about his internet presence and how it interacts with his defensive/nervous personality#and in grand scheme of things the way he interacts with ''activism''.. its not for him/about him.#at the end this reaction is a part of him! he can do what he will with that#hope he has people around him that can be critical about his intentions/reactions without it being taken as a personal attack
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I had to get it out of my mind so obviously it has no context
#I lied there is a story here#I wondered where 'Art' came from and I said oh it must be some shit like Arthur#But then I also thought mmm that's not funny so I named it Artemis#and I thought it would be hilarious that Patrick would find out at some point in his teenage years and it would tease him lmao#God why are they so hard to draw and stylize I'm dyiiiing#That's why my style is so inconsistent here I apologize for that I'm still getting used to it#HERE COMES THE NORMAL TAGS#my style#sketch#my art sucks#challengers#art donaldson#patrick zweig#challengers movie#challengers fanart#traditional drawing
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i nearly anon'd the thorki non-con fic out of SHAME but in two weeks it's become my third most clicked-on fic of the year, behind only a multichapter fic and a bit of angsty sifki porn lololol
#this is about 560 hits btw which i know is not much for bigger fandoms and it's just that i tend to be in some weird niche but gosh!#i'd written thorki before but it wasn't e-rated so if the non-con tag really did work against it then wow no wonder ppl write this pairing!#you ever been to reddit where someone posts about how their latest fic only got 20k hits in a week and you're like “WTF”?#and it turns out they're in some hugely popular fandom and that's the least read fic for that pairing on the entire site by a mile.#that's like glimpsing a parallel universe. what a strange place. why would any fic ever have more than 1000 hits omg!#and 1000 would be for if you wrote something Surprisingly Popular. like e-rated thorki non-con apparently is.#meanwhile 'cockroboros' may only have 35 hits but every one of those 35 people agrees that i was right to write that thing!!#and me and the other 86 people who wanted to see missy interact with jamie moriarty are besties now <3#SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I TURN THE NUMBERS BACK ON OH NOOOOOO THIS WAY LIES MADNESS!!!#the sifki one had a bump recently which i must assume came from one of those 'recced it in a discord but never said a word' incidents.#those are increasingly common and i hope i am not alone in finding them ever so slightly creepy#if you're going to look at me you need to at least pat me on the head to cancel out the anxiety of that damn it!#*flashes back to when i hid that one ten'n'donna fic because nobody would tell me where all the readers were coming from*#fic related#anyway i think it's important to mention i wrote thorki non-con fic in case anyone following me thinks i am Unproblematic in some way.
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not mine, found on pinterest
#I think this is from someone named rocket raccoon on wattpad#couldn't find the og#but lmao#this reminds me of that fic where karen decides she hates birds and turns on instant kill for every bird#and eventually this means she comes to the conclusion that sam The Falcon wilson must die#hilarious fic highly recommend#spider-man#peter parker#karen the ai#get it karen!
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In the event which I consider to be highly likely, as I don't expect people to read my tag rambles, especially not in gifsets (I have the hugely unhealthy habit of putting important meta in there more often than I'd like), I thought I should iterate it here too:
It's so important to me that people know that Kafka (or well, from how I read her) is neat, with which I mean that she's tidy, she's neat. You won't catch a happy Kafka if there's even a speck of blood on her clothes, nor will she be thrilled if there's blood on her person directly. Is this inevitable, considering what she does? Certainly, but have you heard how disappointed she is at even one mere stain? The sigh, the disappointment, and then the little audible vocal equivalent of a little footstomp. Yeah, this woman is neat, there's no question in my mind about it. You can talk to her post-fight, but if there's a stain anywhere on her attire, please know that you simply won't have her attention, and you will hear complaints like in that VO on repeat. You just, you just won't.
#[ mini study. ] she must have sought something extraordinary. everything she does comes at a great cost.#[ i know i've seen a thousand artworks on twitter with her like that and i understand the aesthetic. i get where it comes from. ]#[ i also know that people find that for some reason inherently sexy (god i hate this word; why do i hate it?) but-- she doesn't. ]#[ god; and then i'm reminded that blade is usually covered in blood? yeah. /yeah/. ]#[ thanks lauri. thank you for this. this absolutely calms kafka down in my head. ]#[ she's borderline pouting about it in my head. ]#[ but also to specify-- because i /know/ kafka has... many /cough/ opinions about blade fighting. but pls know there's a... ]#[ difference between being very likely at least semi-aroused by someone fighting. that doesn't automatically mean she's aroused by... ]#[ blood. like literally. fighting doesn't automatically equal killing. which does not automatically mean baths of blood; ladies and gents.#[ i should write on that once. ]
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fell back alseep for a few hrs this morning and had a dream about Scrangle looking for Ingo in the present day after learning about the Subway Masters 😭 they ran into Emmet and Emmet was like "You're too late. Ingo is not here & he has not been here for 3 and a half years" and Scrangle's response was just "Then I'll find him!" wtf....what if i exploded
#new dynamic i failed to consider where scrangle and emmet dont get along#because emmet is trying to be realistic after years of heartbreak and disappointment looking for his brother#meanwhile scrangle has the mindset of NO LAWS OF THIS WORLD CAN HOLD ME AND I HAVE TIME TRAVELED AT LEAST ONCE ALREADY. INGO HERE I COME#scrangle#dream journal#ough. Scrangle being very determined to find Ingo when they learn he exists in the present day bc it gives them hope--#-- that their other friends from hisui exist in the present too. wherever ingo is everyone else must be right?#and then scrangle will know where all their friends are for sure....... 😭
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I really am so sad I don't like isat. The themeing was very good
#isat critical#like the ''we must be prepared for the destruction change will bring'' shit came back so hard at the end#specifically with loop context/destroying themself to become a star. to become loop#and the fact that when siffrin deviated from the script. finally changed the way he performed his play (act 5)#that's when it broke#and he had to ''destroy'' his friends to do it. In a way. When all he knew how to do was fight/snapped#and it's like. of COURSE loop is how siffrin was able to escape. Because escaping the loop meant siffrin had to save/love themself#value their own life and not just their friend's#to realize that they couldn't do it on their own. that they needed their friends to help them out of it. they needed support#that being loved was more than saying the right thing or doing the right quest#isat is so strong structurally/thematically/plot-wise and I personally despise it comedically/character/dialogue writing-wise#and the whole game is dialogue. like isat is the most conflicting experience I've had in a while#Where I hate actually reading the dialogue and I don't like the character writing but I love thinking about it's themes. like hello#that sucks i'd rather have it just be one or the other#*aaravos voice* you must live life in the grey#Like the king and siffrin foil is my beloved. And I absolutely adore how the King's story was ended.#But I dislike siffrin as a character and I also hate most of the game's execution#like every emotional beat is made anticlimactic by the lack of subtext and the constant repetition#(literally laughed out loud at ''my house my country my HOME!'' like we said the same thing 3 times babe. the whole game is like this)#isat has a huge case of ''we wanted conflict but didn't give characters any real flaws to be able to do it''#idk. Everyone repeated over and over that they don't touch siffrin because he's uncomfortable with it. Over and over.#And yet he's still like. ''It's because Isa finds you disgusting'' Huh. Idk if we did the work for Siffrin to come to that conclusion#Like literally Isa never does anything to even imply that. All he's ever done is sing Sif's praises. makes me feel crazy#Like ''oh he views everyone else as just a character!! a pawn!'' except no he doesn't. he barely did in act 5#and even in act 5 he's horrified at how he treated odile. like. we did not commit to that. I got sad lukewarm flowey#Do not even get me started on odile's ''I think it's so cute you trapped yourself in time and went crazy because you love us''. Girl#Like no we can. We can commit. Siffrin did bad things and going crazy was bad. Odile wasn't wrong to be upset.#Like why not 'That was terrible of you to say. But I won't leave you—you still love people who make mistakes- because what else is there?'#like we got so close with the worst loop being the permanent loop. Siffrin is still loved no matter what. But idk. Felt brushed off#oh isat...you strange being...
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Ok I didn’t like apocalypse very much at all I think everything in it feels unearned it makes no fucking sense like I cannot imagine being someone coming from demon bird and then skipping like 2 volumes worth of story content to get here and none of the creative liberties they take really are in service to much of anything by way of the themes of the story and they don’t get explored much anyhow. In addition none of the animation was anywhere near as interesting or good as the previous two ovas. Midman apocalypse of mid
However there was a cute Akira face . So it was fine I guess
#maybe I’m just hating. i didn’t like it though#i don’t really like the angle they took with miki either ehh . ehhhhhhh. it was eh. I’m disappointed#i knew it was the one that has a reputation for being like The Violent One which must just come from ppl who haven’t read the manga bc#i didn’t find it to be exceptionally more violent than the end of the manga except for that like I said it’s unearned because there is no#lead up to it so it kind of felt like. capital e edgy. yknow? yknow ?#except for that one scene where he eats the kid though LOL#anyways as I always say . But What Do I Know#maybe I just need to think about it more#nah i read it again i was being a bit harsh I think it. maybe it coulda been something. but it wasn't . it's more like that I think
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Theory with no coherent proof on my part: brenner only visibly ages rapidly when a portal is open.
#brenner 'dies' very early on after rhe portal opens in s1 so we dont see the effects#but in s4 he looks considerably older.#then in s5 he apparently has a whole bald cap - portal that opened at the end of s4 has been open for approx 1.5 years#theres the tie in to the ptsd/trauma metaphor with the UD representing repressed memories#or repressed memories aka 'lost time' in someone memory#the whole thing where ppl with traumatic childhoods cant remember their childhoods very well and it comes back sooner or later#i wonder if there is a supernatural tie into that in st? like when a portal opens to the UD all that 'lost time' suddenly is allowed back#into the light aka out of the subconscious and into the conscious re flashbacks and memory retrieval#i dont believe NINA at all beyond the flashbacks el has before brenner got involved#bc it seems to me that brenner possibly took advtg of els vulnerable state to possibly manipulate her memory retrieval#which irl has been a long time point of controversy which is psychologists convinving patients that they have memories of trauma#they dont actually have. which idk how valid that is but brenner is a psychologist so if anyone he could find a way#also when the 'lost time' comes back to the surface brenner ages bc of those time loops begin to unravel. the real years brenner has lived#take its toll rather than him de aging as time loops back again to the beginning#very dr who of him. or at least every time he dies its another time loop thats created except from our perspective as the audience we#wouldnt know. because we are only watching from a set linear timeline (1983-1986) and we dont see the time line resetting itself#since all the timelines are similar enough with only small differences ('easter eggs')#tying this into the wheelers- their name literally means 'creator/operator of wheels' aka time loops. so are they The Source?#with the subtext surrounding 'truths' and 'lies' in ST i dont necessarily believe all timeloops are created equal#one must be the 'true' timeline while the others must be 'lies'. aka lonnie saying how people sometimes make things up 'to cope'#that and the heavy subtext behind hawkins being a cursed town. not necessarily anywhere else in the US#and how you can only open portals in hawkins per alexei#makes me thinks these arent legitimate timeloops. like time isnt physically looping back and rerunning events bc otherwise it wouldnt only#affect one small town in indiana. also we dont see the UD/the MF be able to affect time itself but rather ppls perception of time aka#mind control and memories. meaning that could it be time isnt actually looping but rather everyone in hawkins has their memories wiped and#recreated every time there is an inciting incident (which is unknown)#^this doesnt really explain how brenner is able to revive every time he dies unless brenner is actually an admin of this system and lives#'outside' the time loop. so. brenner is a video game character actually whos actual player is blissfully safe from harm outside of the the#computer screen#isnt this just the plot of the matrix. with 'the source' (the central computing core aka the wheelers?) and keymakers etc etc
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#its sort of funny. i think my medication is working pretty well. i feel stable in a way i never really have before#is it the dopamine stablizer or is it my ion channels? whos to say. it doesn't matter. but it also doesnt change some things#the ways i think and react negativly to change. but it makes it easier to deal with. i still experience this strange dispaire on the#weekends or anytime im not working. i think the oddest thing is thst i dont think ive ever been this consistenly sad#not in a depressed sort of way. just a passing thoughts make me tear up sort of way. it doesnt feel out of control. it just feels like a#prelude to grief i guess. bc my mum is still in the hospital and its so hard to kno what that means from halfway across the country#my sisters are both home right now. they both live within 3hrs of where we grew up. one sister lives in the city my mom goes to for#treatment. so they have the opportunity to see her more than me. i dunno if they do tho. we dont really talk. i dont kno if they're as sad#as i am. if im overreacting bc i cant physically see what's happening. what the feeling is in the room. not that she would probably complain#shes the suffer in silence type. my dad keeps texting us pics of our shitty lil sunroom that hes redoing#to make my mum a lil sanctuary. he must be sad too. its his wife. hes staying with her in the hospital rn. i dunno its so weird#when i talk to my counselor she assumes i find out info thru calls or talk to my sisters abt it and i gotta b like nah we dont really talk#i get my info thru text. i havent talked to my parents on the phone in like a month. i dunno we just dont talk. so i dont kno how to reach#out and be like yo so whats up? shoulf i plan on coming home this summer for a bit?? like???#this is the disadvantage of leaving thr place where you grew up. probably when i finish my phd i should move closer to home#somewhere in the Appalachian mountains maybe. somewere in the eastern deciduous forrest. somewhere with thunderstorms.#but thats years from now. who knows what ill b doing. for now im just sad and tired and i dont quite kno what to do in the short or long#term bc im feeling the weight of my mental limitations rather intensely. but maybe im just being self limiting#whatever. i dont have a dead mum yet. shes not even on hospice care. things are just uncertain and dont look so hot#i just dont see how it can get better from here when chemo gave her secondary blood cancer and shes still full of tumors#i dont think im being that dramatic. it just objectively seems not great for survival#unrelated
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Osha as a shielded daughter of a high ranked official in court, keeping secrets that he has twin daughters instead of one (It was also a secret that their mother was a witch)
Her and mae switching places as "Mae-ho", with mae being great in field combat and osha with combat tactics
everything went out of order when the king's most trusted general and right hand man, Qimir, arranged a coup
chaos ensues while massacres are everywhere
She loses her family, separated from her sister, hiding from authorities, trying to survive and when she thought she was far away from danger
Qimir tracks her.
#truly a “if no one is doing it I WILL” category#Unhinged Qimir overturning the whole kingdom in search for Verosha is very canon Qimir isn't it?#being a witch is illegal here and so is being twin witches so crime on crime#osha literally swifts past qimir a few times and he's enamoured#he deducted that they were 2 people playing “Mae-ho Aniseya” and goddamn was he right#Don't worry the kingdom was under a tyrant rule so sooner or later it will fall#QIMIR'S “I HAVE CROSSED OCEANS OF TIME TO FIND YOU OSHA SO COME OUT FROM WHERE YOU ARE HIDING”#vs. Osha's “I DON'T FUCKING EVEN KNOW YOU LET ME GO YOU FREAK”#anyway mae was discovered and under qimir's protection but in return she must locate osha#this is how qimir tracked her btw
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Fighting the first movie tooth and nail trying to figure out how it all goes down.
I am not winning 😞
#between au#dreamworks trolls#main issue is that poppy and branch DON'T KNOW EACH OTHER prior to poppy arriving at bergentown#so the true colors scene DOESN'T WORK the way it does in canon#but i need branch to sing again dammit‚ his whole arc in this movie is taking his ''i am a BERGEN i am NOT A TROLL'' mentality#and shaking it vigorously until he comes to understand that he's both and neither and that's okay#like i know what i want for AFTER the events of the movie (pop village and bergentown as allies‚ trollstice & chef dead & gone)#but i need to know how to GET THERE IN THE CONFINES OF THE MOVIE (chef finds trolls‚ trollstice almost happens#poppy negotiates peace between their kingdoms like the girlboss she is)#just branch BEING THERE in the scene where chef shoves creek into gristle's mouth could change everything so so much#bc would creek still be yoinked and shoved into gristle's mouth??? would he still get the chance to show his true colors?????#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#possible idea is to retcon the timeline so that gristle senior is still there in the movie‚ but slowly dying from illness while his son#is acting king and falling apart under the pressure#but then i still need to figure out how the fuck poppy's role fits into that#there's just. gdmt branch why must you make everything so much more complicated#branch and his complexity addiction smh
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Recent game related things .. hrmm...
#I do like the inconsistency of the first map. that is actually something older but that I re-found and added to my Game Reference stuff#so that when characters reference where they're from I can be accurate. I like that the whole map is kind of shifted up that way. Where the#actual south part doesnt even count as the south since its Too Far and Scary lol. and if you say you're from 'the north' thats basically#like.. one single continent. Though some people do make distinctions like 'north midlands' or etc. still. I like the ways that common#language isn't always precisely accurate like that. and thinking about why a culture would classify things a certain way or etc. etc.#The inventory page is so funny to me because it's literally just the BASe like.. sample layout just to make sure it works properly with 0#actual design into it. just colored rectangles thrown together in MS paint. but what if I like... left it like that.. what if all the other#art in the game and UI is like stylized and fully matching BUT the inventory/journal/etc. screens I just left as plain colored blocks#with random misalignments and black spots and etc gjhbhjj... It looks unfinished in a Funny Contrast way to me.#the wordcounts are just like... my past few days of writing.. I am still not getting 2200 words a day done or whatever I needed. I'm lucky#if it's even half of that .... tee hee.. :3c I do also keep having appointments and other things going on but..grrr...#The full map of the area is probably not necessary but I thought it would be more realisitc if people were able to reference things. Like i#you have people all living in a city area probably at some point someone might mention a neighboring city or some landmark nearby#or etc. so I thought having at least the basic names of what's around for reference would be sensible. A side character mentioning#'oh yeah I don't live here full time I just travel from Marisene sometimes' or whatever makes it seem more like a Real#Fleshed Out Place than people just making vague references like 'the river' or 'i come from a city nearby' or 'i went to a place somewhere#around here' or 'the other city' or etc. lol.. Especially since global cities/global areas are weird as they operate almost like an#independent country within their walls. so it's like a micro country inside of another country usually. just plopped down in some agreed#upon plot of land that won't be too disruptive to the main country around it. That could get very complex depending on the cultural and#political backdrop of where they're placed (though obviously they try to choose the 'easiest' areas possible for it). Asen is a very mild#country without much history of conflict or anything so it's fine. But still interesting that Sifeh and the entire branched out global area#border three other districts of Asen. Which means like 3 times the local representitives you'l have to negotiate with for some major change#or anything. I think one of the 'random characters you can find around the world and have short discussions with just to make the area#feel more populated and real even though theyre not actual important npcs' is going to be a guy who actually serves on the council that#handles running the global areas and he's like.. some perpetually exhausted middle aged elf running around with a clipboard or whatever#ANYWAY...... hrgh... still trying to write when I can....#I WISH so badly that I had the scope for a simple character creation menu and all character interactions would allot for the background#of your player character. And also to have a simple day night cycle where places in the world you explore/people you talk to during the day#have new options or dialogue at night.. BUT alas... I already am so behind on everything as is lol.. aughhh... T o T#As the worlds number one Needless Detail And Complexity Enjoyer i must dilligently prevent myself from adding additional complexity
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