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dragon-fuccer · 4 months ago

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Hi!!! If u're reading this u're probably the author of this absolutely amazing fic ✨

And if u're not, go read it;!! It's so good u won't regret it<33

First some fanart jumpscare !!! (I hope u're ok w it bc I haven't asked for permission 😭)

It's just how I imagine Jack to look with a few smaller headcannons based on the fic, and there will be more fic related doodles soon, so prepare for that >;D (ofc as long as u're ok with it!!)

Second, the thing I lured ya here with, aka mine n my bfs ocs, art and description for ya to use in the fic if u want to ^^

TYSM for this offer, both me and my bf feel hella honored and it actually gave us a ton of motivation to actually expand on these two!

Tws : body horror, brief description of violence n death, mentioned suicide and brief description of murder

Smokey belongs to my bf and Something is mine !

Normal text is all written by me and green text was written by him ^^

Art and design by my dearly beloved:

Smokey

Real name : Victor Wilson

Age : around 26 yo

possible victor lore

used to be victor by marble hornets standards known as smokey

a dropout uni student with raging nicotine addiction (smokey did not retain any uni info but vic used to be psych student (projecting much lol))

prolly watched marble hornets with friends for fun and against better judgement decided to give a visit to rosswood park thinking its a film project in the beginning

turns out its not and they spotted the lanky guy

smokey the horror movie enthusiast wants out at that point before shize goes down but its late and they r deep in the forest so comes to conclusion they r all p much dead at this point

peeps want to go hunt for the lanky man cus cool and internet views

my guy is like f that yall r following basic horror lore of everyone dies im not playin like that and straight up says hes not going and hed rather go and sleep in the burned down psych ward

he gets called a wimp but decides if hes gonna die hes not dying an idiot and decides to vidtape everything on his mid tier phone camera

not sure what happens to the rest but they do their meet cute w slendy and prolly with time like half of em ends up in the arko e way or another

smokey manages most of the night fine but like luck would have it still end up meeting the guy

does not go well

wakes up in the burned down hospital not remembering the last unknown time and broken phone beyond repair

decides oho this is bad lets go back to uni and never talk abt it

meets with most friends back at uni but like 2 of em r missing and they just pretend nothing happened, friend group dissolves

after that he starts slowly having memory gaps, waking up in other places

all comes to head when it turns out he missed 5 months of uni after he wakes up back in rosswood really far from home and skinnier than ever and suddenly no more uni student

after that victor surfaces less and less till hes just kinda gone at that point

Smokey first shows up the night victor goes with friends to rosewood

in the beginning surfaces confused unsure who they are and what is their purpose

with time smokey goes through both phone and computer of vics

binges whole marble hornets in one sitting and decides he has a personal vendetta against the operator

since then they work on somehow stoping it (and terribly fails given the lack of information) leading to continuous trips back to rosewood and sleepovers in the rubble of the ex psych ward

figuring out the nicotine addiction takes a bit of time and leads to pretty nasty withdrawal symptoms as well as a very wrecked dorm room (he does find the cigarettes tho and is smart enough to connect the dots (smart cookie, here have a star sticker))

smokey learns asl and isolates themself a lot in the months of operator research

he still maintains two personas to some extends which is one the masked smokey who uses mostly asl and rarely speaks (to some extent also a tactic against being caught by police) and times when he goes without mask on library searches and grocery shoppings

smokey starts a yt channel dedicated to catching the operator and ending it which attracts at best some people commenting on obvious marble hornets ripoff and few cents into his wallet

with passing time they do start finding victims in order to keep themselves alive n appease the the big slinky leading to series of alleged suicides then turned to series of murders

he starts off with two of his ex friends who go back to rosewood and start showing symptoms he learned from mh

When they commit murder they hide in the trunk of the car and basically hotbox the whole thing due to smoking making the victim whoozy and confused, moving on they connect a pipe (like garden hose or whatevs) to the exhaustion pipe and suffocate their victims with the car smoke

the thing that tips off the police is the nicotine in the system of every victim and an account of almost to be one that got stalked by smokey who upon being discovered (also while smoking and which earned him the name) decided to bolt

since then he continues on just about the same, aka researching the operator, finding new victims and surviving untill they meet Something

His hoodie is dark green, the mask is greyish from the grime n dirt, the big cross on it is black so are his pants and hair

Something

Real name : Rae Dyer

Age : 23 before transformation, currently unknown

Something used to be a cryptid fan. They worked at a radio station and had a small night show where they played old rock and often rambled about the latest creature they heard about. While out, looking for a new creature to maybe see, they stumbled upon the Slenderman and became obsessed to document it somehow, quickly spiraling out of control and slowly, bit by bit became a creature themselves.

Something doesn't remember much from it's past life. It used to just wander, guided by the static in it's head towards it's victims, always terrified itself but not knowing why. After Smokey found it, they started wandering together. At first they had serious communication issues - Something only able to speak in tap code and Smokey mainly using ASL - but with time they learned to speak with each other, and now they can understand the other almost without words.

Something doesn't really eat, it survives on fear and between itself and Smokey, it always has more than enough of it. It does steal food for Smokey tho, cigarettes as well, usually leaving them in whatever ruined building he decided to stay in for the night. Something got also addicted to nicotine by just being around Smokey so much, leading to separation anxiety fueled by withdrawal when they're apart.

Something cannot speak, and can only communicate using tap code. When it's particularly worried or scared it does emit a small noise, that sounds like a particularly breathy whine, and more commonly when it tries to speak, quiet spider like ticking can be heard coming from it's mouths.

It usually walks hunched over, used to having to duck under branches, entryways, etc bc of it's height.

Something has pale skin reminiscent of porcelain, and is usually wearing a v neck sweater with a white undershirt and jeans or other pants. It's hair is very thin and scarce, floating around it's head down to it's lower back

Also a tiny doodle bonus of how I imagine these two showing up on Jacks doorstep xjbxbcbcb

We think the most probable case of them showing up would be Smokey getting bonked on a mission (probably by a car or a would be victim) and Something bringing them over to Jacks cabin to get pached up, tho feel free to do something else ya might think fits =w=

Again, thank you so much for the offer, we're both so honored to have the opportunity to show these two off and maybe if you're so inclined getting them a chapter in ur amazing fic<3

If u have any questions you need answered Abt the two don't hesitate to ask them as well! ^^

-Kai n Bean

#eyeless jack #creepypasta #fanfic rec #fanfic #creepypasta oc

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kylejsugarman · 1 year ago

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according to fandom wiki tmw is jesse birthday… what would he and demi and baby do to celebrate?

I KNOW not to be like is excited for a fictional character's bday but like.....he is a special guy :') i think his birthday would always feel a little weird for him just because like he never ever expected to live this long, so every year that passes is just like "oh. im still here. this doesn't feel right but it's what i have to deal with", and he subsequently isn't going to make like a huge deal about it, but there has to be a little celebrating!! that's demi's sweetheart and baby's best friend!! if the weather's fair, they'll probably take the dogs on a long walk through the park to enjoy the outdoors, then grab some lunch. jesse knows his wife and daughter well enough to Know that they'll give in to Birthday Instincts, but he still tries to act surprised when baby finally cracks and says "i have to give u ur present Now". she's been trying to learn how to knit recently and gives him socks and (an admittedly short, she started running out of time) scarf that she's made to keep him warm. she and demi also made peanut butter + chocolate cupcakes and even though neither of them are stars in the kitchen, they turned out pretty good, if not a little fucked up looking ("this cupcake's been to war," he says solemnly). demi gets him some fun stuff (newest "burnout paradise" game, some shading pencils and a new sketchbook) as well as a succulent that she's been cultivating. she doesn't know A Ton, but she knows that jesse previously lived near the desert and thought maybe he'd like a flowering cactus. it gives him a weirdly nostalgic feeling, almost but not quite homesickness because as much as he tries to forget his first life, he does sometimes miss the little details of his old home. he doesn't know how to communicate to demi that it's a really special gift, but he can kiss her and something in her hug tells him that she has An Idea. the rest of the day is just chill, which is what he wants, and that night, he's able to survive the uneasy thoughts about surviving and guilt and danger because he knows that he must be doing Something right here

#anonymous #ask #syd squeaks #im so normal. im SO SO normal seriously.#jesse pinkman #demi ayuluk #baby ayuluk

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curryfury13 · 8 months ago

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Hello again!!

It's time for the next retrospective of my very first fan-fiction, True Friends. Truth be told, I've been having the time of my life doing these and I hope you've been enjoying it as well!

Today we're going through chapters 4 and 5!

As a quick reminder, you can click on the banners to read the chapters in full. Otherwise, I'll be giving a commentary about them. I'll talk about the good, the bad, and the things I've learned along the way.

Thanks so much for reading! Let's get started.

Oh ho ho! Guys, it has begun! Past me has started to realize how much fun it is to be on Destiny Islands. No more are we in a rush to leave and get into the game. The pacing comes to a weird bump here that can't decide if it wants to stay or go.

This is also where we learn that Hinata can fight. Or really, we learn she has a really strange problem. When she sees weapons on display, she just grabs them and does a random routine with them... As people do...? Totally normal, human response. Right?

Oh Hinata, I did you dirty.

I was wracking my head to explain how all these kids on this island knew how to fight. I have kids. They don't know how to fight with wooden swords. They pretend they do, but they aren't good! Don't tell them I said that.

There was a rewrite of True Friends I toyed around with, where Riku carved all the weapons out of wood as a hobby. And it was a sort of passion of his that passed around through the rest of the kids as they all get their own personalized weapons. Maybe that could work, but it took too much work to really keep up on and still didn't explain where the fighting skills came from. So I settled with the sparring class. But that still doesn't completely make sense. That is dangerous stuff! What school has a sparring class? Did I miss that elective in school?

Please people. Tell me your secrets. How do these teenagers know how to fight so well? In my story, Hinata got specialized training for specific purposes. It makes sense for her. Doesn't make tons of sense on the island, but... woah, I am going off on a rambling rant aren't I?

If I ever do a full rewrite, I will find a reason. A believable reason for them to know how to fight. Mark my words!

I will leave this chapter with the author's note I left there back then:

***Author's Note- I wanted to share something silly with all of you. My husband was editing my story as I was making dinner last night, and when I came back to read over his corrections he added a nice little tid-bit for me. I don't know if you all will appreciate it like I did, but I thought it was hilarious:

"Okay everyone," Mr. Zhao looked over the entire group of students, "You know how this works, since it's a Monday I want each of you to choose a sparring partner and your weapon and practice! Remember, today is rocket day! Each of you grab a launcher, and do your best not to get blown to bits! Anyone who explodes gets an F!"

Riku nodded, he was well familiar with rocket day and had been patiently awaiting its arrival. Today, Sora was getting an F.

Thanks for reading! ***

This was one of many of my husband's amazingly hilarious inserts. He always made me laugh while editing my stories, never criticized how corny or cheesy anything was. He's an incredible writer, but never tore me down. Just kept telling me to keep going. I wanted to share this little gem, even as a retrospective.

I love how this chapter title insinuates things have taken a long time to get here. Literally nothing has taken a moment to breathe since the story started.

I realized just now I rag on this story for both going too fast and for slowing down too much during it's time in Destiny Islands. I think what gets to me is how so little happens during the time on the islands. It's time that could be used better. And that is going to be a running theme for a lot of the series!

The chapters have been relatively short. The details are curt and to the point, but the actions don't lead to much. That said, I remember getting oh so giddy when Riku first grabbed Hinata's hand. Oh the butterflies were real!

They were being open with each other and it was raining! I was so into this scene when I wrote it. I remember reading it over and over again afterwards, as if it were some form of love letter.

And that's not even mentioning their first spar fight! This was a moment my husband and I discussed. It was important to me that I showed that Hinata wasn't as powerful as Riku. I didn't want to have an overpowered character. She was competent, but not so competent that she could wipe the floor with other characters. And that's something I've always kept true for her. She and Riku still spar with each other, and now she's able to win a round or two every here and there. They're always going to be similar power levels.

#kingdom hearts #true friends

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bunbeeplays · 8 months ago

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The Lemon Legacy: Generation 1, Chapter 34 - A Wedding With Pizzazz, Part 2

Miko: We’re not supposed to see each other until we walk down the aisle!

Penny: When have I ever cared about tradition? You’re more important to me than some lame superstition. You look absolutely stunning.

Miko: I mean, you do too, of course.

Miko: You’re wearing white. Why?

Penny: I know for a fact you’re not a virgin either, hon.

Miko: No no, I just mean… you hate wearing white.

Penny: Did you expect me to wear a dress made of peacock feathers on our wedding day? … Actually, don’t answer that.

Penny: I know I dress a little wild on the daily, but today is about celebrating us, Mimi. I wanted to match my beautiful wife.

Miko: Oh, sweetie.

Penny: We’re a team. A united front. We both get to shine today, and for the rest of our lives.

Penny: I don’t ever want to hear you doubt how much I love you ever again, do you understand me?

Miko: I-I…

Penny: I have lived a blessed, amazing, fabulous life, and the best damn thing that ever happened in it was meeting you. You’re the most kind, selfless, and positive person I have ever met. You’ve celebrated my highs and picked me up during my lows. You were there for me when all my fake ass Simstagram friends never were. If I kept listing what I see in you we’ll miss the whole damn wedding.

Penny: I love you, Miko. And you know when I love something, I love it to the max. I’m the one who asked you to marry me, y’know. You’re never getting rid of me. Deal with it.

Miko: I love you too, baby.

Miko: Oh Watcher, I feel like a mess

Penny: A beautiful mess.

Miko: I’ll go see if the makeup artist can help me freshen up.

Penny: I'll be right behind you in a second, Mimi.

Ophelia: How much did you hear?

Penny: Enough. Thank you for being there for Miko. She struggles with her self-esteem a lot, and that PlumBright piece didn't help. Despite everything that’s happened, it’s nice to know there are still decent Sims out there. Needless to say, the band will be getting a big tip tonight.

Ophelia: I didn’t come find Miko or say that stuff because I was worried I wouldn't get paid or tipped.

Penny: I know. That’s why you’re getting it.

Penny: Let’s keep in touch. You have my personal number, but I'll send you my business contact info later. I like you, and that’s a rare thing to actually mean in my line of work. I don’t have a ton of music connections but you’ll be the first person I call when someone asks.

Ophelia: That's so sweet, thank you!

Penny: You got dragged because of me, I owe you something.

Ophelia: Hey, friends stick by each other through thick and thin. And like the article said, I'm your talentless friend!

Penny: What more could a tacky, self-obsessed girl ask for?

It's not so lovey-dovey up in the Laurents' office.

Tiff: You can’t blame me for Ty’s work!

Hilary: There’s no way he would have known most of that without you telling him.

Tiff: Anyone could tell that those women are total disasters!

Hilary: Enough! Your disrespect has been tolerated for far too long, but you will not disrespect my clients and their privacy. Penny and Miko no longer feel comfortable having you participate in the wedding, and I don’t feel comfortable having you as an employee. You’re fired.

Tiff: You can’t be serious!

Hilary: You have been given several chances to curb your attitude. You failed every single time. Security will escort you off site.

Tiff: Forget it. I’m out of here. You’ll regret this, Hilary.

Hilary: Goodbye, Tiffany.

As Ophelia walks back inside to ready herself before her performance at the reception, she's unfortunate enough to run into Tiff, who can't even be escorted away by security with any humility.

Tiff: I hope you’re happy. You and your friends may have won the battle, but this war is far from over.

Ophelia: This wasn’t a battle. You’ve been the only one fighting and you fought so hard you gave yourself a black eye!

Tiff: You’ll see! YOU'LL ALL SEE!

Hilary: I apologize for my former employee’s behavior. I hate to ask this of you, but would you be willing to fill in on the violin? Anaya will cover Tiff’s portion, you would just accompany with Alice.

Ophelia: I know the song. I’ve got this.

The violin trio starts the processional song, along with Moses on the piano. It's go-time.

Penny: Last chance to bail.

Miko: And give up having the last name Pizzazz? You're dreaming, sweetie.

Penny: That's my girl.

It's now or never. Let's do this!

You may now kiss the bride!

Penny and Miko Pizzazz walk back up the aisle, feeling more in love than ever before. The hate, the panic, the chaos of the past 24 hours didn't matter.

This feeling is what they'll remember in their elder years.

#The Sims #The Sims 4 #The Sims 4 Legacy #The Lemon Legacy #TS4 #The Sims 4 gameplay #sims 4 #generation 1 #ophelia #moses #miko #penny #tiff #hilary

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lovemesomesurveys · 2 years ago

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When was the last time you wore a mask, and what kind of mask was it? A few weeks ago when I went to my doctor appointment. It was just the common blue mask. Masks aren’t required anymore, but I still wear mine whenever I go somewhere and have no issue doing so.

Do you say "couch" or "sofa"? 🛋️ I say couch.

Have you found any gray hairs yet? if so, how old were you when you found your first one? I swear they started popping up the second I turned 30. I’m 33 now and haven’t had my hair dyed in a few years, in fact it’s all my natural color now cause I chopped my hair super short a couple years ago, and there’s several gray hairs currently. D: I blame the heavy amount of stress I’ve been through due to health stuff and the health stuff itself. I honestly never thought I’d be one to gray early like this. I have a bad habit of plucking them out and I’ve heard you shouldn’t do that but it drives me nuts. I’m allowing my hair to grow more before I finally get dye it again. I can’t wait.

Do you think you will dye your hair when you go gray, or will you let it be natural? Like I said, I’m definitely going to dye my hair again.

Have you ever met anyone named Eden? No.

Which name do you like better: Eden or Aiden? Eden.

What is your favorite type of meat to eat? 🥩 Chicken and turkey. With the turkey I’m referring more so to like sliced thin deli turkey for sandwiches. I like turkey we have on Thanksgiving, but it’s not my favorite.

When was the last time you felt jealous of someone? Meh, for the first time in a very long time I’ve felt a little jealous of some people I mod with on TikTok for someone. It’s so dumb but sometimes it feels so cliquey and I feel left out and blah I’m too old for this.

What are three thing you think of when you hear the word "India"? 🇮🇳 *shrug*

Are there any bar stools in your home? No.

When was the last time you sat on a bar stool? I have no idea.

Have you ever been to a spa? 🧖♀️ Nope.

What is one thing you hate? My health situation. I really feel like I’m missing out on so much and life is just passing me by. Meanwhile, the rest of.the world goes on and people continue to live their lives.

Have you ever sprained your ankle? No.

Do you own an artist's palette? 🎨 if so, when was the last time you used it? Nope.

When was the last time you attended a religious ceremony? ⛪️ Physically, it was back in December of 2015. Otherwise, I’ve watched several sermons via live stream the past few years.

If applicable, what is one trend you started when you were in school? I’ve never been a trendsetter.

Have you ever done a craft project using a soup can? Possibly.

Have you ever had a Sony product just stop working? *shrug* Also possible.

What is your favorite type of tree? 🌳 Pine trees.

Have you ever had a spaniel for a pet? No.

Do you like the word "iota"? Sure.

What celebrities were you obsessed with when you were younger? Oh, I was totally the pre-teen/teen who had her walls plastered with posters of various celebrities popular at that time in the early to mid 2000s. Aaron Carter was my first celebrity crush, so I had a ton of his posters. Of course I was obsessed with the Jonas Brothers, so they took over a good amount of space on my wall. There was Jesse McCartney. Justin Timberlake. Various other celebrities.

Would you rather sing or play an instrument? if you'd rather play an instrument, which instrument would you prefer to play? That sucks cause I’d love to be able to sing and play the piano.

Were you named after someone, and if so, who? No.

Did you ever play with a yoyo as a kid? 🪀 >> I tried but they always just annoyed me in the end. << Same.

Who is your current favorite celebrity? Alexander Skarsgard is my love, of course, but I also like Sebastian Stan, Pedro Pascal, and Oscar Isaac. I’m a fan of Jenna Ortega as well.

What is one thing you aren't able to do currently, but you wish you could? I can’t travel or go anywhere, really, right now. The only places I can go are to doctor appointments via medical transportation on a gurney. :/ I can’t wait until I’m able to function somewhat normal and go places again. Just to the fucking grocery store would be nice. I really can’t wait to go to the beach.

What is one thing you think tastes good with granola? The only granola I eat is granola bars. And not those rock hard ones either, I’m talkin’ Quaker Oats chocolate chip or some other fun flavor.

When was the last time you ate a granola bar? That being said, it’s been awhile since I’ve had one. I used to have them all the time. They made good snacks.

Do you prefer jelly or jam? 🥪 I think I’ve mainly only had jelly, but I’m not opposed to jam. Whichever.

Have you ever met anyone named Cameo? No.

What was the last thing you sent in the mail? I have no idea. I haven’t sent something in the mail in a super long time.

What is your favorite thing to do on the ice? >> I don't do anything on ice. <<<

Have you ever visited any of the Great Lakes? No.

Have you ever swam in any of the Great Lakes? if so, which of the Great Lakes have you visited? >> I can't swim, so no. the lake I live near is Michigan. <<< I can’t swim either nor have I been to any of the Great Lakes.

What were you almost named? I’m not sure.

What was the name of the first dog you had as a pet? His name was Scruffy.

Do you any of your family members have birthdays on a holiday, and if so, which one(s)? No.

When was the last time you attended a kegger? 🍾 Never.

What was the last thing you wrote down? I don’t recall.

What is your favorite type of bird? 🦜 I don’t have one.

Do you think of yourself as young or old? how old are you? I always say I’m old, but I’m only 33 lol. It’s weird like I do feel old in some ways, especially physically, and in the sense where I think like omg I’m almost 40. I also feel like a bitter old woman who has just been beat down by life for so long. But then I also feel like I’m emotionally younger and a child at heart in some ways. I feel like I’ve been stunted because of health issues. I don’t feel like someone almost in their mid 30s. Whatever that’s supposed to feel like, right? It’s confusing.

Do you enjoy doing crossword puzzles? Sometimes. I had a crossword app I was hooked on for a bit. I like doing word searches more, though.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

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thedovahcat · 10 months ago

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Gorillas and the New Year (Plus Price Increases)

Wow we made it to the end of 2023! Somehow...! Barely maybe for some of us.

For me it's been a lot of climbing out of the rat bucket I found myself in last year and the first half of this year. Maybe a little beyond that. I feel like now with college on the horizon, I'm just starting to be able to reach the rim of said bucket. It's been very hard and challenging, but honestly, probably necessary if I was ever going to start breaking any unhealthy cycles in preparation for my new upcoming school years.

This is the last chance I get to actually form some kind of career, something I didn't think I'd ever care about because I was always so willing to throw in the towel, and for a multitude of reasons. I've talked about it before in other posts, my lack of confidence that I was ever smart enough or like...good enough for anything beyond art... and this isn't a dig at art. But I've just had this whole self discovery thing all year where I'm realizing a career in art is not for me. I've been doing this for ten years now, maybe a little less but let's round up, and it's taken me all this time to realize as much. Unfortunately, I just had to go through it in order to realize as much, but it wasn't all bad. I made a ton of friends through it, I got my first full time job from it and gained much, I was able to buy my first car with it, a whole lot of firsts happened because of my skill in art. Not that it's like...spectacular or anything but I'm pretty proud of how far I've come. I don't know where I'll end up with my style, as I want to keep drawing as a hobby, but it's fun seeing it evolve year after year slowly into something I really dig.

Got a little off topic, but yes. So there's been that whole battle, along with the other side of it where I still worry if I'll be able to succeed in this Computer Science path I've chosen. I've met a lot of nay-sayers and doomspeakers about it, but I suppose that's the way it is with near everything. After all, -I've- turned into a doom speaker about an artistic career too. It's hard not to keep that to myself sometimes, only because I just don't want people to end up in the same dead end hole as I have where you can't advance your job anywhere, and you don't have a degree so people are even less willing... Gosh I feel like I've ended up turning into my parents in a way, they're the same. Harsh but fueled by concern. I come off that way a lot unintentionally and I feel bad about it. So I'm trying to combat. It's ...well it's going. It's my whole personality at this point lol.

So there's been those angles, there's been a lot of social changes in my life in regards to who I put my time into and what and where. It's gone pretty good on that front. I'm setting boundaries harder than I ever was before, and even then I'm still a bit shaky on things, but I've got what I call an obsessive mind, so if I don't do anything to help myself, then I'll be ruminating on shit I don't like for the rest of my college years, and perhaps life. And that's definitely not what I need right now. I gotta bring my A game to this and really put my neck out there if I want to succeed like a normal person lol (or whoever those go-getters are called. Something I am definitely not by heart.)

Started playing D&D 5e for the first time with my friends and honestly that's been like the top point of my year. I've been wanting to play for so long but things just never panned out or were a good time for it, and I was scared by all the numbers. I have gotten over my fear of numbers for now by scoring so well on that placement test earlier this year, so lol! Whatever it takes. I just really miss having some kind of group thing to look forward to weekly or maybe every 2 weeks, or whatever the case. Feels good when you feel like you belong somewhere, or people are looking forward to the same stuff you are. Always nice.

And I've started some new RP storylines with people I've known a long time, and unearthed some old ones that had been on hiatus for yeaarss, so that's also been really nice and exciting as well! Sure we're not all glued to the screen 24/7 anymore like when we were younger, but just a little fiction break in between life stuff happening is so welcome. I've been having a super hard time getting this 'escaping-life-through-fiction' thing I have under control, and I won't say that it is.... but it's considerably shifted into RL has taken priority over computer. Which, yes, good. Not that I ever had a problem with -that-. I knew it would be like this when I wasn't working. When I -am- working again though, I won't be so worried. I'll always care more about my irl job than silly things going on online, which is the goal I'd like to reach eventually.

Commissions were really really good this year, I tallied it all up, and even though it only came out to me being able to pay for a semester and 2/3rds, I'm still really really happy so many people have come back over and over to buy from me. It all feels worth it, my art journey. And I'm very much happy to continue it, for my own sake and for your sake! I love seeing your characters and I am very happy ya'll trust me enough with them time and time again. Despite all I've said, I'd be more than happy to offer commissions to people and draw for myself for quite some time yet.

...You're probably still holding your breath about the prices huh?

Sadly, as with anything, now that I have college to think about and, at the moment I can't really mentally handle a real job and school at the same time, I'm going to keep running commissions to do in between my school work (alongside rather). They might come out a little slower, but that's how it'll have to be a while.

At most I want to increase the sketch prices by $5 for each category (bust, half, full), and see how that does until the middle of the year. If it's all well and dandy, I will increase them again by another $5. Originally I wanted to bump it up ten all across the board, but I feel that's too much of a spike compared to what people are used to. Not to mention I'd have to raise the prices of all my other items, which will also see an increase come middle of the year. This plan isn't solid yet so don't hold me to it. I will make the necessary announcements when it's time!

Anyway, I wanted to thank everyone this year for just overall being there and helpin' me out tremendously when I needed it. The efforts are not taken lightly or forgotten, and likewise once I am able, I can't wait to be able to help all of you in the same way ya'll have helped me. Really, aside from financial and life stability lol I honestly miss having a job cuz it allowed me to spoil so many people. I really really miss that. So I'm working hard to get there again.

For now, here's to 2024! Come what may. We'll make it to the end some way or another, so buckle up.

#math and gorillas

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hazzabeeforlou · 2 years ago

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Hi, I’m Toni.

Got a slew of new followers and I’ve been almost inactive the last half a year (at least) so wanted to do an update/intro so you know who I am LOL and so my long suffering fandom besties know what the fuck’s been going on (if anyone still cares rip sorry it’s been forever)

Currently writing this from my sick bed of ear cellulitis? That I got from wearing my mask? It would literally only happen to me. Had to go to urgent care and get a butt shot of antibiotics so it didn’t, you know, spread to my bloodstream :)

Anyways I say that to say that I probably got sick in the first place because I’m incredibly run down right now. The classical music world (im a professional musician) FINALLY opened up again, and to meet gig demands I only work my pandemic retail job once a week. I have been traveling the last four weekends in a ROW, which, due to my chronic pain (which has seen SOME improvement over the last year!!) makes me super duper exhausted and I have to admit tik tok has been getting most of my brain numbing time.

Life post-happy drugs has been tough. I’ve seen improvement in the areas I wanted to, physically, but mentally god. Drugs were nice. Anywho, I’ve done a ton of witchy/ancestral connecting/herbalist kinda things the last six months, and I now have an alter and a spiritual practice that has really brought me a lot of growth and meaning. It’s hard healing from your past when you’re still living IN it… and there’s no improvement with my parents. They’re still homophobic as hell and Republican as fuck, despite screaming matches. The threats of physical violence prevent me from confronting my dad any further. I’ve kind of given up hoping they will ever change.

It’s funny though, I would classify this year as the year I started to “feel” things, and of course that happened physically post the drugs, but also emotionally once I started to let myself FEEL emotions, god what a train wreck. Who knew humans could CRY so much? That emotional revelation led to the probably overdue realization that I’m likely Autistic and high masking, and have been suffering from that classic 30’s wall that “gifted girl high masking autistic children” eventually hit wherein they are no longer able to just push through and ignore. That’s been tough.

Writing has always been how I process and understand emotions, and now that I’ve started to actually FEEL them, it hasn’t become as essential to my functioning as it had been the last six or so years. I miss it, and I plan on finishing all my projects I left behind… as I’ve said many time The Garden part 3 IS coming I promise lol. But! Hopefully. And no promises. But I have the most delightful Christmas fic tucked into my head that I would love to publish this year, if I can find the time to get it on paper.

Okay as for fandom… I did a “growth thing” earlier this year and deleted all the bbygate stuff I’d been saving for the inevitable end. I just can’t anymore. All the photoshop, the blatant exploitation of it all… yeah I think the best option is just not to care. If they’re gonna drag this out for the rest of my life then I’m going to ignore the shit out of it. Speaking of ignoring, I also noped out of the H and O nonsense. God. What a MESS. I liked HH, truly, but the fave for me was Matilda. To be honest with you all, I listened until I grew naturally full of the album and I moved on with my life, it wasn’t world changing to me the way FL was. HOWEVER. FITF? Lord save me i didn’t even know it was coming out and it hit me like a ton of bricks. I’m fucking obsessed. I’m planning a MP. I genuinely think it’s Louis’ finest work and I can’t get enough of it. Every time I listen I like it MORE. I theorize it’s going to be a slow blooming album that smacks everyone’s expectations in the face. I’m so fucking proud of Louis. I bawled real ugly tears at Common People.

And lastly as always, I believe the boys were in love but I make no claims about their lives now. I enjoy the hints and speculation and love larrying along, but I think they’ve established these personas that are bulletproof to fan speculation these days, and I feel that’s how they truly want it. And that’s cool, won’t stop me from writing Larry because it was the truest gayest baby Star crossed lovers story out there and still makes the best fan fic.

Apologies for the novel but nice to meet you if you’re new HI I’M TRYING TO BE BACK to my old chums, and feel free as always to talk to me, my ask box is always open ❤️

#mine #personal #hiiiiii guys

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sissytobitch10seconds · 1 year ago

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All the Things Yet to Come Are the Things That Have Passed

Fandom: The Umbrella Academy

Summary: Viktor wished it could be Five with his whole heart and soul, but he missed his siblings so dearly that he doesn't really mind that it's them.

Warnings: Pregnancy, pregnant trans character, medical inaccuracies, starved characters, and general PTSD

Word Count: 6,103

Ship(s): Five Hargreeves/Viktor Hargreeves

Archive link!

A/N: It's the second to last fic! This is another small step forward in their healing process so while not a ton of stuff happens here it was very cathartic for me to write. While I will admit that I do enjoy putting my characters in really hard Situations, I love writing them healing for it almost as much. Thank you all for reading, I appreciate it so much! Stay sissy and bitchy everyone <3

Days were a lot easier to count when he was no longer trapped inside of the apocalypse. Viktor was still confined to a single room for the time being since Grace didn’t know what would happen if he tried to venture from the bed, but he felt safe there so he wasn’t complaining. He liked being able to tilt his head up and see not only his own vitals, but that of his baby. He could also turn to the side and see that Five was still there and still very much alive and okay. He was recovering slowly as well, which only made sense given how much of his power he had used to get them back to where they could really have a life.

It was nice to finally have some time to rest in a place that was clean and well-kept after living in the apocalypse for years on end. He’d even been able to have a bath with running, warm water and a washcloth that wasn’t threadbare and falling apart. He didn’t remember the last time that he had been fully submerged in water instead of just cleaning what needed to be.

Something that he had noticed on the harder nights when he was unable to sleep was that the house was a lot louder than he thought it was as a child. Five had helped him uncover his powers and learn how to use them when they first ended up in the wasteland, but it had just been them when they were there. Now Viktor was able to compare what it was like to hear things where he previously couldn’t before. The house ached and groaned as the wind pushed against the sides, tree branches scraping against the windows on the third floor and attic, the sound of people sleeping and mumbling as they drifted off.

When he was a child he had always been able to hear more than the standard person did but he had never been around actual ordinary people to be able to tell that. He thought that he had just had a talent for music even if he had no powers, but as it turned out, the medicine that Reginald had given him what just stunting his powers back enough that he wasn’t able to hear every minute detail like he could now. He had excelled when he was playing the violin because he was able to pick up on the tiny changes that a lot of other people didn’t, though.

Being back in the house that he had grown up in was both comforting and disconcerting. For a while, he had assumed that it wasn’t something that was ever going to happen for him and Five. They had been trying to so long to get back to a place where they belonged but to no avail. Now they were back, somewhere where it was safe for them to grow their little family, and it felt surreal.

The past couple of days had been very quiet as Grace tried to make sure that he slept as much as possible. She was very dedicated to the idea that rest like that was what was going to help both him and Five be able to recuperate rom the massive power dump that they had. He was inclined to believe her since she had been caring for seven super powered children since they were all four.

Every day he began to feel better and brighter, like the life was being dripped back into him through the IV in his arm and the feeding tube down his throat. He was uncomfortable because of it and the lack of movement that his body was unused to, but overall it was a wonderful thing to watch himself get better.

Eight days after his arrival, Luther knocked on the door to the infirmary and then swayed back and forth nervously. Viktor pried open his eyes from where he had been pretending to sleep to appease Grace. “You can come in, you know. I get that we look kind of scary after everything that we’ve been through but Five and I don’t bite,” he glanced over to his husband as he said that. Five had both used more of his powers and wasn’t at risk when being put under by a sedative, so he had been out cold since they had gotten back. Grace had explained that a sedative strong enough to keep Viktor asleep would affect the baby, which was something none of them wanted to risk.

“I just didn’t want to disturb you if you didn’t want me in here,” Luther explained. “We didn’t really have the best relationship before you left and you’ve been through a lot, so you don’t need any extra stress.”

“It’s okay, Luther,” Viktor assured him again. “I haven’t been around people other than my husband for the last decade but I can tell that you’ve changed. You’re welcome to come and sit with me. I could use the company of someone that’s not asleep.”

“Right,” Luther flushed and gave Viktor and awkward little smile. He crossed the floor and then lowered himself down into the armchair that was angled towards the beds for visitors that were going to be sleeping in the infirmary. It was something that Grace had included when they were children because of their stubbornness at wanting to be with their best friends and siblings. “I, uh, a lot has changed since you left. Including me.”

Viktor shifted so that he was sitting up properly and holding his stomach in his hands. “What happened? I know you can’t tell me everything, but it seems like even the house is different.”

The taller superpowered man thought about it for a moment, his eyes taking on a far-away look as he sifted through all of his memories. “Well, not long after you and Five disappeared, Diego left.”

“Where did he go?” Viktor asked worriedly. He had yet to see the marksman and while he and Diego hadn’t been the closest, the latter preferring to spend his time fighting with Luther or hanging out with Klaus, Viktor still cared deeply for his brother. Some of his fondest memories were of them working on music together when they were allowed to have their hour of extracurriculars of their choice.

“He joined the police academy for a while. Allison and I theorized that it had something to do with him wanting to help people but not being in Dad’s pocket. He left after less than a year after he joined it,” Luther explained.

“What happened after that?” Viktor asked. Knowing that his brother had left the Academy was reassuring, he wanted all of his siblings to be able to escape the strict control of the man that had abused them their entire lives.

That question took a little longer to answer than Viktor was necessarily comfortable with. “I don’t know,” Luther shrugged. “We never really kept in touch and at that point Dad had already sent me to a university so that I could study. I kept me going on missions all the way until he died and it was only after he was gone that I realized how wong he was for doing that.”

A warmth spread through Viktor’s chest. He knew that his siblings weren’t likely to keep in touch with each other when they were finally free to go their separate ways, there wasn’t much that bonded them together back then, but it seemed like they had been keeping track of each other enough to know that the others were okay. Even though they were all different people and they hadn’t been allowed to develop their personalities until they were away from Reginald, they had been raised together and thus belonged together in at least a small way.

“What about the others?”

“Well, Allison left on our birthday. She said that she was going to go to Hollywood to become a famous movie star. She was always talking about it, but she did it more after you all left. I think that it might have been her way of coping with the fact that you were gone. It hit us all pretty hard when we realized you weren’t come back,” Luther admitted.

“Did she make it? She was always the most melodramatic when we did those little plays,” Viktor smiled fondly. He and Five had reenacted a couple of the scenes from their assignments in between keeping themselves alive in their wasteland. It was something that had kept them close to their siblings while they were trying their hardest to get back to them.

“She did,” Luther nodded. “Her first big movie came out a year after she left and then she just kept making more. I think she got married recently too, to an actor named Patrick.”

Viktor smiled. “That’s wonderful. What about Ben?”

“You could just ask me, you know,” Ben said from the doorway.

Luther jerked in his chair and looked like he was about to leave, but the other ex-hero quickly motioned for him to sit back down. “I know that our last couple years in the Academy weren’t great, but we’re still family, Luther. You can be hanging out with Viktor at the same time as me, as long as he’s also okay with it.”

“I missed you all so much that I want all of you around me all the time. Not literally, I think I would get pretty fed up with not being able to hear my own thoughts or be alone with my husband, but I did missed you a lot,” he laughed. Despite all the time that had passed and the confidence that he had gained from being off his medication, he was still awkward and social cues were still very difficult.

Ben laughed as he walked over. He grabbed another one of the crappy chairs that were stacked in the corner of the infirmary from back in their school days, when they learned about medical procedures as they were performed on their siblings. “How are you feeling today, Vik?”

“Better,” the other nodded. “I think every day I’m beginning to get healthier. I can eat more than I did when I first arrived and Mom said that I’ve already gained two pounds. Hopefully most of that is going to Baby.”

That softened the air around them as both of his brothers were reminded of the tiny, unborn life that Viktor was harboring inside of him. “I still think it’s crazy that you and Five are actually going to be parents in a couple of months,” Ben commented.

“I know, it’s been hard for me to process too and I’m the one that’s actually pregnant,” Viktor laughed. It felt good to do that again. Ben had been fairly close with him and Five before they had left, so there was extra comfort when it came to hanging out with that particular brother.

They lapsed into silence for a moment as no one really knew what to say. Then Ben shifted in his chair, “So when you first got back we reached out to Allison and Klaus, they said that they would be flying back to come and visit you. I don’t know how long they’re going to stay.”

“Klaus and Allison are living with each other?” Viktor asked. He hadn’t been able to ask Luther about that particular member of his family before they had been interrupted.

Ben nodded. “He moved out there with her two years ago. He decided that if he was going to be able to get clean then he had to do it in a place devoid of all the memories he had before and where he didn’t know any of the drug dealers. He went to a rehab facility out in LA and has been doing really well since. I think he’s training to be a dance instructor at the moment, but the career ideas keep changing.”

Viktor had only been around for the beginning of Klaus’ substance abuse issues, they had started when they were all thirteen but had gotten radically worse a month after their fifteen birthday, but he was immensely proud of his brother for being able to do something so hard. “I’m gonna be happy to see them. Hopefully Five will be awake by the time that they get here.”

“Speaking of awake,” a voice from the doorway startled everyone other than Viktor. He had heard their mother approaching from when she had been down in the kitchen, a side effect of having to live paranoid of violent survivors and breaking buildings for the majority of his adult life. Grace tutted, shaking her head affectionately as she walked over to her children. “I’m very happy to see you all getting along with each other, but Ben and Luther are going to have to come back and visit another time. Viktor needs his rest so that baby of his can come to us strong and healthy.”

“Of course, Mom,” Luther replied as he got up. He stopped and awkwardly smiled at his brother before he finished his departure. “I’ll come and talk to you when you’re feeling up for visitors again, if you’d like.”

“I would like that,” Viktor smiled. He had barely known Luther, and had only seen the hard, protective outside of him when they lived together, so he was excited to get the chance now that things were different. Before they had a chance to say anything else, both of the brothers were ushered out of the room and Viktor was once again left alone with his husband.

---

Another week passed before something new finally happened. He was still having near daily ultrasound and doppler checks to make sure that the baby was still growing well inside of him. Nothing much had changed and the baby was steadily improving in health, but after so much anxiety about possibly losing them Viktor wanted to be sure as often as he could be.

He had also been growing in strength, which was most likely contributing to the health of his unborn child. He had gotten most of the monitors removed, but he still consistently had to be hooked up to an IV to administer fluids whenever he was feeling low and the feeding tube to give him some extra nutrients. He had begun to move around more, spending a lot of his days in the chair in the corner of the room instead of his hospital bed. He had also been showering himself instead of allowing Grace to give him a sponge bath. The first time that he had showered was something that he would never forget, and he had never felt cleaner when he cuddled up in his bed.

His newfound freedom when it came to mobility allowed him to nestle up in Five’s bed whenever he was feeling lonely. Luther and Ben still visited him from time to time to chat with him, especially after they convinced Grace to let them take their dinners up in the infirmary to keep Viktor company while he ate. Despite the company that he had from two of his siblings, he still felt isolated when his companion wasn’t by his side as Five had been for almost a decade.

Viktor was settled down in the chair of the corner and had been all morning. He had a book spread open on the arm of the chair and he was reading it out loud, his other hand resting firmly on his stomach. He had a blanket tossed over his legs to keep out the vague chill of the infirmary since he was still having difficulty regulating his own body temperature.

“Knock, knock,” Ben interrupted as he walked up to the door.

The other man didn’t mind at all, since he was starting to get bored of his activity anyway. If the baby had been moving or was actually there and he could see some kind of reaction, reading out loud would have been a much better thing to pass the time. Seeing as they were still soundly asleep inside of him, however, it was mostly just tiring his voice and making him frustrated when he stumbled over the words. “Just in time. I’m starting to go stir crazy in here,” he chuckled.

“Well, I have good news about that. Mom thinks that some movement would do you some good. As long as your joints aren’t hurting you too bad we can go for a walk in the gardens. Luther’s worked really hard on them since Dad died and they’re absolutely beautiful now,” Ben explained.

Memories of what the grounds had looked like back in the days of the Umbrella Academy came rushing back to Viktor. The grass had been cut so short in the few places that it was allowed to grow that it was basically like sitting on dirt. There was a singular massive oak tree towards the back gate of the house that none of them were allowed to go near. There had been no flowers, no shrubs, and instead of a path they had a race track that looped around the garden for when they had to run laps.

He wasn’t sure how he felt about leaving Five alone in the room, just in case he woke up. When he voiced this concern to Ben, he was half expecting to be met with rolled eyes and dismissal. Instead, his brother just walked over and gently took his hand. “I know that you’re worried. But Mom has him under pretty heavy sedation and she’s not going to be bringing him out of it for a while. There is a non-zero chance that he will wake up, that’s true. But if he does, then Mom or Luther will inform us immediately and I’ll use the Horror to carry you back up here through the window so you can be with him.”

Viktor fidgeted for a moment as he thought about the offer. He didn’t want to leave his husband but he was also desperate to get outside into the fresh air. The window in the infirmary had been opened a couple of times during his recovery, but Grace had been worried enough about them getting cold that she didn’t do it often.

“Alright, if you really promise,” Viktor nodded.

Ben extended his hand out towards the other man with his pinky outstretched, “I promise.”

Viktor laughed as he hooked his finger around Ben’s. He knew that his siblings were always going to be bigger than him because even when they were all very young he had been the smallest. Doing the last of his growing in a place where he didn’t have steady nutrients hadn’t helped in the slightest, but he was reminded of it based on the difference in their hands immediately.

After the decision had been made, Ben went downstairs and got Grace. She helped him into a pair of sweatpants, a t-shirt that stretched over his quickly growing stomach, and a jacket to keep away the chill. Their mother also had a wheelchair for him to sit in if he got too tired and so he could make his way through the house easier. She wanted him to walk outside to get some sun and proper fresh air, so she wasn't going to let him tire out by just getting down to the back door.

Ben was there by his side as he allowed Grace to push him out of the recovery room and down the hallway. The infirmary was on the first floor, which was specifically done so that it was beside both of the kitchens. He felt anxiety rising in his chest when his husband was removed from his view by the walls of their home. He had been asleep and unable to speak with Five since they had gotten back and when they were in the wasteland they hadn’t been exactly joined at the hip, but it was still disconcerting for him to be so far away from his partner after they had been through so much together.

He reassured himself by rolling what Ben had said over and over in his head. If something happened, Five was in the best hands that he could be and Viktor would be back in a second. It was a good idea for them to spend some time apart from each other so that they could get back to the life that they had promised they were going to have. They were always going to be one of those couples that was far too attached to each other, but they had always dreamed of having careers and education outside of Grace and Reginald. It was something that they were going to pursue after the baby came, but it also meant they couldn’t be in the same room as the other at all times.

Once they got to the edge of the garden, Viktor placed one hand on his stomach and the other on the arm of the wheelchair. Ben stood next to him as he slowly pushed himself up into a standing position, his hand out and ready to help his brother should he need it. As soon as he was standing, Grace left them to go attend to some of the household chores and keep an eye on Five like she had promised Viktor she would.

Ben looped his arm together with Viktor’s and the two of them began to walk through the opulent gardens that had taken the training space in the backyard. A lot had changed since Viktor was last back there. The running path was gone and had been replaced by an even stone walkway that weaved through an artful arrangement of blooming flowers and neatly trimmed shrubs.

“The air is so clear here,” Viktor commented softly. He tilted his head up so that he could see the crisp robin’s egg blue of the sky, which was only broken up by a couple of fluffy white clouds. He knew that it wouldn’t stay like that for long given where they lived, but it was a soothing to see anyway.

“Was it not where you and Five came from?” Ben asked carefully, trying hard to make suer that he didn’t trigger his brother.

“No, everything was covered in the dust and the air was full of all sorts of stuff. Something horrible had happened there, Ben. It made it so hard to live,” Viktor sighed.

The conversation dropped after that because it was clear that neither of them wanted to continue talking about the atrocities that Viktor had been through at the current moment. They were slowly walking down the stone-lined path to make their way through the garden.

They rounded the corner to see that three other people, who Viktor had somehow missed when they first left the house, were sitting there. He turned towards Ben with a perplexed look before he tried to figure out who was waiting for them around the bend before they got there. A smile split across his face when he saw the rest of his siblings, his heart fluttering like mad in his chest. He hadn’t realized just how much he had missed all the others until he was finally back and in front of them.

“Viktor?” Allison asked as she got tugged out of trying to mediate the conversation between Diego and Klaus. She got up from the bench that she had been sitting on and then reached slowly out to him, as if to ask if it was okay to check and make sure that he was real.

The other superhero barely even thought about whether or not he wanted to be touched as he grasped her hand and then tugged her closer to him. “Hey Allie,” he whispered as he then wrapped his arms around her fully to bring her in for a near bone-crushing hug.

“I thought that we were never going to get you back. When Ben called us I almost didn’t believe him, Klaus was the one to remind me that Ben would never do something like joke about you two coming home,” Allison murmured into her brother’s hair. Viktor had recently had Grace cut it so that it was at a manageable length he actually enjoyed. When he was in the wasteland, but he and Five had let their hair grow as long as it needed to and then lopped it off when they felt like they would hurt the other or themself by doing so.

She pulled away from him so that she could mop the tears off of her face with the side of her hand. “I’m sorry for crying on your shoulder. Do you want to sit down?” she asked as she gestured her hand towards the bench that she had been sitting on.

Viktor glanced over to Ben who gave him a small nod. He hadn’t been there to hear absolutely everything that Grace had said about his care, so he was trusting his brother to be able to help him manage it. Ben had always been more into the medical side of helping their mother in the infirmary anyway, Viktor had just wanted to be helpful.

Carefully, he walked over to the bench and then lowered himself down onto it. His bones were very fragile from having to suffer through his teenage years with barely any nutrients, so they weren’t tolerating the stress that came with having to spread what little they already had for a baby very well. He was in low amounts of pain pretty steadily throughout the day but it was nothing that he couldn’t handle now that he knew his mini-family inside of his family was safe.

The next person to hug him was Klaus, who threw his arms over his brother’s shoulders lazily to bring them closer together. “I’m glad that you’re back, V. Having to be the only trans person in the entire Academy was just too much for little old me.”

Viktor laughed, he had forgotten how good it felt to do that as often as he had been. “I think that you were able to handle all the attention that brought just fine. You never shied away from Dad when he was yelling at you to stop being feminine the way I did for being masculine.”

“Yeah but Mom said that medication had you all fucked up in the head on purpose. I relate to that too,” Klaus said, his face softening affectionately.

He wanted to steer the conversation away from that as quickly as he could. Ben walked over to the other side of the path and sat down on the cement blocks that separated the gravel from the grass and woodchips. Allison was standing restlessly by him, clearly having something to say but not being able to express it properly. She looked a lot more like herself than she had when Viktor had been looking at the pictures of her that Ben had brought him a few days ago. She was wearing a pair of brown chinos with a button-up shirt that she had tied the bottom corners of to make it a pseudo crop top. She had some of her hair in a bun on the top of her head, which had been her favorite way to wear it when they were allowed to do their own.

Viktor turned his head so that he was looking at the last person. He and Diego had always had a strained relationship, more than the one that he had with Luther. Diego had been struggling with the idea of being inferior to anyone but he also had a massive heart that was overflowing with empathy. He had tried to befriend Viktor several times in the quiet of the in-between moments when no one was looking at them, but he always threw himself in the opposite direction when he felt any kind of scrutiny tossed his way.

“Hey, Di,” he said softly as he looked over Klaus and directly at his last brother.

“Hey,” Diego replied awkwardly. “I’m glad you’re back too. E-especially with th-the,” he paused and his mouth twisted. Even after all the time that had passed, Viktor was still able to recognize it as the expression he made when he knew that his stutter was acting up.

“Me too,” Viktor placed his hand protectively over his stomach. “Five and I always knew we wanted kids, but we wanted to raise them in this time instead of the one that we came from. It’s like the universe was telling us that we were going to get what we wanted even if I wish that I had been in better health before I got pregnant.”

Allison listened intently. “My husband and I have been thinking about having a baby of our own. Klaus said that we have to find him a place to move to before that happens though,” she rolled her eyes affectionately at her brother.

“Dear sister, I have to deal with enough shrieking and screaming from beings that only I can see, I don’t also need it from one that everyone can,” Klaus huffed out in explanation. “Congrats on starting your own little family, Vik.”

It turned out that the only thing he needed to slot back into a space in the family was to reunite with his siblings once. Klaus and Allison were both staying at the Academy for the time being, having promised Viktor that they would be there until Five woke up. Diego still lived in The City like Ben and Luther did, so he came and visited but wasn’t actually staying in the building. Each of the siblings had been visiting Viktor and doing things with him to keep him from getting cabin fever.

Allison would sit with him in the living room and show him some of her favorite movies. She refused to let him watch any of hers, obviously embarrassed at the idea of the people that knew her most intimately seeing some of her earlier films. She would always make them a bowl of popcorn, going so far as to bring Viktor a little bowl of chocolate sauce to dip his in, and they would cuddle together on the couch. It was nice to hear sounds and see a television playing something other than the news in a house where Reginald would have never allowed that before.

Luther came and talked with him about what had happened in the past and some of the things that were happening to him now. It was clear he didn’t know what he was supposed to be doing with his brother and was trying his best. Eventually he settled on bringing some of the foods that he was learning how to cook up to the infirmary for them to share. They promised that as soon as Viktor was feeling well enough that he could be on his feet for more than half an hour at a time, they’d make something together.

Ben continued to visit Viktor and take him out to the gardens for walks. They went on one at two in the afternoon every day that the weather was good. They took the same winding path through the gardens and talked about the books that they were both reading. Viktor had recently developed some insomnia, which was very common for pregnant people entering the third trimester. He fought the panic that always waited for him in the deep parts of the night by starting what was essentially a book club with his brother.

Klaus was the one that really shocked him. He brought in hoards of knitting supplies and then began to teach Viktor how to make homemade clothes for the baby. Viktor hadn’t even thought that far into the future, too obsessed with the idea of health and safety to realize what the day-to-day logistics of raising a child would be. Klaus gave Viktor all the drama that Luther had been too oblivious to see or too shy to tell him during their talks.

Diego didn’t come and visit him for the first couple days after he had met up with all of the siblings again. Given that their relationship had been very strained when they were younger, it only made sense that he would be hesitant to come where he might not be wanted. He got bold after a little while and eventually visited with Viktor for what must have been six hours. For the most part, he’d just come and sit with the other man in silence while they both napped. Eventually he brought his guitar and began to help Viktor play a different instrument than his violin, one that he could play around his baby bump while sitting on the hospital bed.

---

Another two weeks passed while Grace was weening Five off of the sedation that he had been on while he recovered from his injuries. Much like Viktor, his body had also begun to respond positively to the nutrients that was being fed to them through the feeding tubes and his skin looked less sallow. It would take time and him actually being able to physically eat enough for his muscle to replenish back to what it had been when he was fourteen and healthy.

Viktor was sitting on the huge recliner in the corner of the room with a book opened on his lap. He was stroking his stomach while reading allowed to the baby inside, feeling a few fluttering movements from within. The baby had yet to move in a way that anyone else would have been able to feel, but Viktor could feel every tiny movement since the child was inside of him.

He glanced up as his brain convinced him that he was hearing something, that there was some other noise in the room around him instead of filtering from elsewhere in the house. He knew that it was ridiculous, he had been unable to hear anything from his husband in what had to have been months since they returned back to where they belonged. The breath was stolen from his lungs when he saw the hazel-green eyes that he had fallen so deeply in love with looking sleepily back at him.

“Five?”

“Hey,” he smiled like this wasn’t the best thing that had happened to Viktor since getting to hear their child’s heartbeat.

The pregnant man shut his book and let it tumble down to the floor as he struggled up to his feet and over to the other hospital bed. He hefted himself up with a smooth motion, the excitement and adrenaline preventing him from feeling the aches and pains that had been plaguing him since he got pregnant. “I can’t believe that you’re awake,” he whispered as he cupped his husband’s face in both of his hands.

“I thought that I could hear you talking and I wanted to see what you were reading. You always used to read out loud whenever I was having trouble sleeping,” Five murmured. He reached up and weakly turned his head to the side so that he could kiss at Viktor’s palm.

“I was reading to our baby, Five,” he replied. “They’re okay. You did it, you got us back to where we belonged safely.”

“I did?” his eyes widened almost comically fast.

Tears had long since begun to rush down his face and drip onto the blanket, but neither of them cared. They had never truly been separated, but Viktor had desperately missed the company of his husband amongst the visits of his siblings. “Mom gave me an ultrasound, I listened to their heartbeat and I got to see them. They’re growing so strong in there, they have ten fingers and ten toes,” he sniffled. They hadn’t been able to get that definitively, of course, but there was enough definition in the grainy black and white image that Viktor was fairly certain of his claim.

“They’re going to be okay?” Five asked. He looked down to the rounded bump on his husband’s front before he tilted his head back up to Viktor.

The other couldn’t say anything, just wordlessly nodding before he leaned down and stole another kiss. “We’re going to be okay, Five. The three of us aren’t alone anymore. We have Mom to take care of our injuries just like we did before we left and all of our siblings still really love us. We’re going to be able to raise our family after all.”

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roguetonorth · 2 years ago

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Through the dark

Requested by: @jbbuckybbarnes - #1. "Stay." & #10. "Is that a drawing of me?"

pairing: din djarin x reader

warnings: tons of fluff, the helmet comes off, kissing, and all the soft stuff we love so much <3

summary: You hadn't seen din, but when his features become familiar to your touch, your imagination wonders what laid under the helmet; though the last thing you expected was him to find that out.

word count: 3.486k

a/n: i have no idea what this is but there's so much fluff it barely makes sense

• masterlist • send me a request! •

First, he gave you his name.

Then, the first time he kissed you, it was through beskar.

But the first time you saw him, it was in the dark.

And you saw him with your touch, with your heart.

Your palm met his skin, soft, warm and welcoming skin. Little curls swallowed your fingertips at the nape of his neck. And you felt Din's pulse run as wild as your own under your touch.

Soft pants of breath tickle where they meet your wrist, setting your chest aflame and seeding a wave of haze through your veins. Peaceful silence dangled between you and Din as he let you map out his features at your own pace, his eyes ever locked with yours despite the lack of light. You held back for a few moments, scared of somehow pushing him, yet too afraid of missing the moment you found yourself in.

Before you realized gravity pulled your thumb to brush against the length of his jaw, strong and curvy angled, the stubble your digit ran over made you smile. You stroke his neck, struggling against patience, wanting to know more of what you thought you’d never have. Your mandalorian stripped bare of his beskar for you, the protection of the dark as the only dome for his creed. He had trusted you wholeheartedly and you wanted to show him he could keep on doing so.

Feeling your hesitancy, Din chuckled softly, the sound rumbled deep in chest as he brought your hand to cup his cheek. He shivered when your fingers found the spot below his eye. Your warmth was overwhelming in contrast with the cold heavy feeling of the beskar— the only welcome touch he’d had in ever too long. Even as you repressed your touch, meeting his skin ever so lightly, it was as if you had the entire galaxy right there.

Din leaned further into your touch, until you felt short lashes as you brushed carefully over his eye. Little wrinkles framed the corner of them and they were a little bit hooded, you realized as he blinked beneath the pad of your finger. His brows lost its concerned furrow as your thumb traced them. He did frown a lot as you had thought, the evidence of it remaining there even as he leaned further into your touch, amused even. Though not even forever would be enough for you to absorb all of this, you moved on to his nose, tracing its delicate yet firm curve. Bridge to tip carved in your brain as you pictured it to be the most remarkable feature of his. Then your fingertip found its way to his lips. Dry and plush, the bow of it spaced and curvy. They met your thumb in a tiny motion, your mouth fell agape both from the kiss he pressed upon your thumb and because of the scruff that adorned his upper lip. And you bit the stupidest smile ever to yourself.

Though it was hard to make out something in the dark, you felt like his cheeks had grown red.

Time carried on leisurely— it could have been an age and it could’ve been a second. Right there, as din pulled you closer, leaning to rest his back on the wall of your now shared cot, you were sure you were the closest to heaven you’d ever be. You accepted his arms on your back, finding a way to be as close to him as possible without making yourself embarrassed. You sat next to his form, still facing him, the awe you found yourself in so strong your brain was still short-circuiting. Din, though, was still silent, lost in the moment just as you were. It was only when you lifted another hand to his face that you noticed he’d been holding it, causing you to chase your breath once again. You ignored the heat creeping to your cheeks upon the realization of his gaze burning through you to lift your intertwined hands to hover over his face. As your skin meets his for the second time, it feels natural.

You take his face in your hands to bring him back to reality. And you were so close to him. Strands of fluffy hair fell over his forehead as you leaned in the furthest you dared, leaving a reverent kiss between his brows, "You, Din," you whispered to him, brushing the unruly curls back into place, "You’re my star."

"Yours?" he whispered back, tenderness sparking through his tone as he let out a breathless little chuckle.

"Umhm," you hummed positively as you nuzzled into his neck, hand cradling his hair.

And this time it was Din's turn to smile to himself.

The next morning you felt fluttery as a summer breeze. The flashbacks of him wrapped in secrecy within your being even as sleep left your system. As you shifted from your spot in the cot, It took you some minutes to realize if that had really happened or if it had been a fever dream— until you felt comforting warmth in the sheets that could only be Din's.

Then, you saw him in the hull, sitting on a crate, addressing his vambraces to his wrists, and when his helmet tilted up to look at you, you felt like something had shifted between the both of you.

You had always cared for him, and him for you. You saw the way he was kind, brave and everything else. He was something you wished but thought could never have. You felt like he shared such thoughts. Though you wouldn't care to admit, the greatest of your fears in this moment was that Din regretted letting you get so close, letting you know him.

You approached him silently, and he didn't say anything either. His mind was running a thousand miles on everything you could have thought of him amidst the dark. Was he like you expected? Well you hadn't exactly seen him. But it actually did feel like you did. Din hadn’t received such affection ever since he was a child. And he was sure it didn’t make a difference for him— But then he met you. Maker, he’d started craving it.

Since the beginning he knew you were different. It started off with some mutual liking, but then he started feeling shy. Every smile, every brush of hands and every glance you’d give him was enough to have his chest warming. Right now, as you offered him a small smile and placed a hand on his shoulder, you had him feeling a whole new way.

The hardest thing he’d been through was to fight sleep with his arms around you. But if he was to be honest, he hadn’t gotten any rest at all. Din of all things was also an overthinker, and every possible reaction you could’ve had upon actually seeing him —which you hadn’t— trundled to his mind.

And he thought about you seeing the real him more often than he thought he should.

Of course you had been curious naturally, but you never had asked him about the helmet. You had never wondered too much about what he looked like underneath it, above all because you respected him. So It didn't feel right. And now that you had that precious bit of him, though you wished to have more, you couldn’t be happier.

You didn’t think seeing or touching him would change something between the both of you as you loved him in any and every way. But now, after he had given you more of him than you thought he would, Din felt a little bit more real. A little bit more yours.

Rising up from the crate to grab his stuff, he stopped in front of you. And you held a sweet smile on your face as you took a grab of his arms to bring him closer. Din mirrored your actions, bracing himself with a hand on your side. The pace of his heart was almost settling when you pulled him for a hug, which he embraced eagerly.

You felt him unconsciously leaning into your touch.

“Everything’s alright?” you ask, pulling away just enough to stare at him, trying to somehow catch a glimpse of the softness hidden by the dark visor.

He draws in a breath as if he was going to say something, but decides just to nod at you instead before moving his arms to pull you closer again. “I have to go,” he says almost inaudibly, more of a reminder to himself than to you.

“I know. I'll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you, cyare.” You feel him give you a kiss in your temple, with warm lips you could only long to have against your own. The motion is soft and tender; it almost feels like you're melting onto him. “a lot.”

You searched his eyes again and you could feel din staring at you the same way you did. You didn't know where you gained the courage from, but before you knew you placed a peck to his helmet, where you thought his mouth would be.

"Come back.”

The next thing you heard crept to your mind hours after he left the ship; his shaked, timid voice, the beskar barrier failing to hide the shift in his tone as he gave you a tiny nod in his flustered manner. "always."

—

The following nights were somewhat difficult.

It had been one night. One night embraced and drowned in your mandalorian's scent and warmth and not having him for the next one was maddening. And you found yourself longing for the darkness of his bunk each day more. That night, submerged in the dark you didn't have the stoic, intimidating mandalorian who threw bounties in carbonite you’d heard of in the streets of Nevarro. You had din— a gentle, tender lover whose presence had become your anchor in such a stormy galaxy way before than you overstepped the line of being friends.

And in the dark, with din, not even the light of all of the stars could light up your heart brighter than he did. You had dreamt of that moment before it happened, and you kept dreaming of it after it did. Even in your sleep, you couldn't get enough of tracing every feature of him. And you felt pretty much like drawing a map of territory you had claimed your own.

He'd been gone on his journey for days now, and besides the child’s coos, when the silence within the crest had grown loud as ever, that thought came back to your mind.

You were familiar to his skin. you knew every line of his under the pads of your fingers, you missed him like your loving memories had just been a dream, and you had just woken up.

It was a little odd to try to picture him like that, though it was more like translating. You already knew him, and the idea materialized to action when he was gone, and your only distraction was to relive the memories you'd kept sacred locked within your very soul. Though you didn't know exactly how he looked like, you were sure din was the sweetest creature you’d ever lay your eyes on. If you ever did.

It started naturally. You had your sketchbook in your hands, and you were human. Although it took a bit of work, you put all of those memories into that page, every line of his you could remember translated into lines of coal.

Of course you knew the treacherous situation you were getting yourself into. Wondering about what din looked like under the helmet, and further than that, leaving evidence of it in your sketchbook. You didn’t think it would put up much of a problem anyway.

Replaying your favorite moment with him made you dizzy. Those moments he'd let himself be soft with you. But especially the night his helmet was nowhere near—It kept you trapped under a spell, one so good that worked even when all you got of him were mere daydreams. You didn't even hear the ship's ramp lowering as your mind focused solely on two tasks.

At first, din was confused when he stepped up the ramp and found you nowhere in sight as he scanned the hull. You must’ve been up to something, he concluded, stripping out of his weaponry while he stared at the ladder, waiting for any kind of movement.

If he was to be honest, he was a little bit disappointed you weren’t the first thing he saw as he entered the ship.

It had been a long hunt. He might have some wounds to be patched, though he hadn’t stopped to pay mind to them just yet. Din waited a little longer, pacing in the hull trying to decide whether he should go after you or not. Then, with a long suffering sigh he decided to go look for you in your quarters. You were definitely up to something, he thought to himself.

You jumped when you heard little pats against metal.

With your heart pulsing in your ears, realizing the noise was din coming up the ladder, you teared the page you were working on from your sketchbook the quickest you could, putting it in the nearest book you found struggled to get all your material hidden beneath your pillow before you closed your book over the drawing, rising from the bed to find shelter for it.

The second the doors slid open and the sight of him blessed your eyes, your hand loosened and the book fell onto your feet with a thud.

You quickly bent down to grab it as you felt the heat rising to your cheeks, turning around to put the book in place. You just forgot to mind the edge teared piece of paper floating to din’s feet the moment you did so.

You only noticed the tragically comic scene after you stared back at him, following the direction of his visor with wide eyes. his glare fixed in the ground. The drawing next to his feet.

Din was frozen like an statue. he- was it? there was no way- right? You couldn't- you wouldn't-

"Is that a drawing of me?" Din blurted out before he even realized.

First things first, he wasn’t supposed to see that drawing. Second, if he did, he wasn’t going to question it. And last, both were happening. You stammered, opening your mouth to answer but nothing came out.

You gazed at the t of his visor for what felt like an eternity awkwardly as ever, thinking of some excuse for that. But the truth was that you hadn’t any. Your mind went blank. You weren’t prepared for this. All you knew was that you had no idea how you got into this situation and how to get out of it.

It was only then that his words hit you. And you stuttered a gasp, “d-does it look like you?”

He remained silent, staring at the drawing. It did. You had always seen him. Though he also knew you’d understand if he decided not to deny or confirm it.

But you were wrecking him. Standing there with your face contorted in a look somewhere between regret and anxiety, he embraced the thought he had been fighting for longer than he thought it was right to— the thought he had every time he looked into your eyes.

This was nothing like din had planned it to be. And had he planned it. He still had two more fobs. He'd do it after the third, longest and hardest hunt. He would come back to you on the ship and he’d give you all of him. This, because he wanted it so badly, but courage would fail him every time he’d think about it.

You wrecked him, you ruined his plans and still, the feeling that grew in his chest was the best he ever had. All din wanted right now was to let you see for yourself his reaction, which you seemed scared of; but all the feelings he kept from you as he sustained the silence were obvious in the foolish smile din held beneath his beskar.

A shaken sigh fell from your lips as you casted your gaze everywhere but to the mandalorian. Despite you being used to reading him even through the dark, that silence was doing no good to you. You were already bracing yourself for the thick tension that would follow you for months, or maybe even the worst; the end. And it would be your fault.

As your cheeks burned torrid as well as the nervous tears you held back, a different kind of heat crept to your skin when you found his visor turned in your direction.

Din’s hand was hesitantly holding the lip of his helm as he was going to lift it off. “Din, no—,” You trailed off, panic suddenly fogging your brain, “I'll—.” Following your instincts you didn’t let yourself finish the thought as you sought to leave your bunk. That was when he stepped in your way, blocking the door with his broad frame.

“Stay.”

You oblige, freezing in front of him, your heart pounding in your throat before you found the courage to force your words through it. “I don’t— you don’t… have to do this, I wasn’t—, listen, I know I shouldn’t have-”

“Do you not want to look?” Din cut your lisped words softly.

“No! I mean, kriff, din. I do. it’s just… you shouldn’t. It feels like I'm pushing you and that’s not how this is supposed to happen. I'm thankful for every bit of you I got to have. You don’t have to do this until you truly want it.”

Though his voice comes out small, there’s just pure honesty in it. “I’ve wanted it for a long time, now.”

Din watches your gaze lit up, your mouth falling open in a breathless gasp before you stop to give yourself a moment to process what you’ve just heard.

“Only if you're fully and completely sure, din."

And was he.

You could never not be mesmerized. As the edge of his helmet revealed him, bit by bit, the warmth within your chest grew to be overwhelming. You knew what din’s decision meant, how hard it was and everything he was waiving off for you. Little did you know, he never thought it would be so easy to let go of everything he held onto his entire life. Little less would he think that it would feel so right.

Your gaze trails down to where the dim light of your bunk touches his scar-littered skin. His lips —which you had touched and longed to kiss ever since— framed by the amusing short stubble he kept, to the curve of his nose.

It’s only then that your gaze meets his for the first time ever as he lifts off the helmet completely from his head.

And Din’s eyes looked as kind as you knew his heart was.

As their warm brown shade gleamed back at you lovingly behind its little fleck of light, —though you knew it from the start— you realized you were right. You’d always known his features suited the duality of who your mandalorian was; a contrast of soft and sharp. Din Djarin actually was the most enchanting, intensely beautiful thing you’d ever lay eyes on. And something, whatever it was, just as intense drew you closer to him in a way that you’d thought he could hear the moment all remaining air you had was drawn from you wholly.

“Does it look like me?” Din quietly broke the silence, his voice, softer than it usually sounded through the modulator of his helmet, made your stomach swirl.

“No art could ever capture how beautiful you are, Din.” You shook your head, smiling widely at the sight of the man you adored so much grinning back at you for the first time of many. “Both here,” you placed your palm on his beskar covered chest, where his heart galloped underneath it. “And here.” you added, settling your hand above his cheek.

There was silence as the both of you savored that moment, your eyes never leaving din’s. He smiled wider, touching your foreheads together. “I could kiss you right now.”

“Shouldn’t you have had, already?”

“Yeah.” He nodded with a smile you could almost feel, a gloved hand settling upon your cheek.

And then Din kissed you. Not in your dreams, not through beskar— he really kissed you. It was a little bit tentative, his lips shallow and lingering before sealing them slowly and fully just as passionately against yours.

And just as everything about Din, the kiss felt as sweet and real as the love you shared, whether it was through the dark or burning bright as the stars.

#i love him #din djarin #the mandalorian #din djarin x reader #din djarin fanfiction #din djarin fluff #din djarin x reader fluff #din djarin x you #the mandalorian fanfiction #the mandalorian x you #the mandalorian x reader #mando fic #fanfic #star wars #pedro pascal

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cynettic · 3 years ago

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Experiment Gone Wrong ( genshin x reader )

Summary - Albedo messes up an experiment, you end up with cat ears. What would the Genshin characters' reactions be if they saw their s/o with them?

Pairings - Reader x Diluc/Kaeya/Zhongli/Beidou/Childe

Warnings - Nonee

A/N - Ugh, start of the week :(

Diluc

Diluc wouldn’t know how to react.

He’d been worried because of Albedo’s accidental experiment. Scared that somehow you’d gotten hurt, but he wasn’t expecting this.

He’d probably stand there frozen for a little bit before beginning to ask you questions, he’s obviously still worried and as much as he hates to deny it, he finds the cat ears incredibly cute.

Not that he’d ever tell you.

Once getting the gist of what happened, he might ask to touch them, yknow, out of curiosity and worry.

And just cause they’re really fluffy and he wants to touch them.

He would be soft of course, running his fingers through the back of it and rubbing his thumb against it just to realize how thin and fragile they really are.

And ofc they’re sensitive af.

So you slap his hand away, voice coming to a high pitched screech when you tell him that even as delicate as he is, they’re sensitive.

He’d probably feel really bad after.

But still want to touch them.

If they stay for a while until Albedo finds the cure, he would definitely convince you to let him touch them every so often. His touch is always so gentle, and he likes seeing the expression you make 😏

Kaeya

Oh god Kaeya…

He would definitely see this as a way to tease you even more, especially if they’re sensitive.

The first time he saw you with them, like Diluc he’d probably be shocked for a bit. This wasn’t what he expected for Albedo’s mess up of an experiment.

He wasn’t complaining tho-

Kaeya would tell you how cute they looked, flattering and flustering you at the same time. He’d ask you if he could touch them, and if you told him you weren’t comfortable with it, he’d understand. If you said it was fine… well, prepare yourself for the teasing that comes along with it.

He will pay special attention to them, and like Diluc his touch is soft as he runs his fingers or kisses them when you cuddle. Additional points for him to see your reactions.

He’d definitely be super careful though.

Without much info of the surprise ears on your head, he doesn’t want to accidentally make a mistake or cause you any pain. So even if he seems confident with his actions, he’s definitely on high alert with them.

But otherwise, it’s like his new little obsession.

Every time the two of you are together, he’ll be playing with them. Even if it’s just treading his fingers through your hair and pinching them between his fingers, or pressing endless kisses when you’re leaning up against him or trying to get some sleep.

He might bribe Albedo to hold off on the remedy for a bit if the alchemist ends up finding it soon enough :)

Would call you kitten the entirety of the time.

Stuff like, “My kitty cat~” and any flirtatious nickname that has the word kitten or cat in it.

Zhongli

Super confused.

In all the time that Zhongli has lived, he’s never seen a scenario like this. Typically, he will have knowledge of experience with anything that comes his way, but this is something and new.

In the centuries and millennia’s that he’s existed (bruh idk how long-) he’s never seen anything like it.

Kudos to Albedo for that-

So he doesn’t know what to do.

He’d definitely ask you a ton of questions about them, and unlike the other boys, he wouldn’t touch them. He knows that like other felines, their ears are extremely sensitive, so he doesn’t want to risk making you uncomfortable or cause you any pain.

If he does touch them, it’s just kisses. He doesn’t want to touch them with his hands in case that makes you feel uneasy. He doesn’t to pet you like a cat.

Whenever he’s telling his stories and you’re sitting on his lap, he won’t hesitate to press his lips against the corners of your ears, an act of affection that gets you flustered every time.

Zhongli doesn’t want you to be insecure about them, so he will make the time you have with cat ears enjoyable, spoiling you with more kisses than often.

Beidou

Would laugh.

Cat ears? Not what she expected that’s for sure. She’d tell you they suit you before feeling them with her fingers, a bit rougher than the other boys.

Compliments them constantly, how fluffy they are, what they remind her of, how they suit you.

“Ha- they look adorable on you-! What? Don’t give me that look, I’m being honest!”

Might mention it to her crew, and then you’ll have a ton of people surrounding you and asking to touch them.

Beidou wouldn’t let them touch them tho-

Those ears are especially reserved for her 😏

She would ruffle your hair, patting you on the head and telling you that you remind her of a cat. If you told her they were sensitive, she’d laugh it off but probably make a mental note to be softer with them.

Plays with them all the time when you cuddle, and would lowkey be sad if Albedo found the remedy for the experiment. She wouldn’t tell you though, and she loves you either way. The cat ears were just adorable on you~

Childe

Oh boy…

Might take a little while to convince the boy to touch them softly because they were sensitive, and he’d definitely be rough the first few times when patting your head and feeling around the ears.

Does not mind your embarrassment.

Probably finds it funny.

He will teasingly use it against you, and if you both ever end up having arguments during the time you have the cat ears, he’ll just stop mid sentence to pet them.

“What can I say? They’re too cute to resist~”

Might be a little annoying cause he doesn’t fully take you serious with them. And with your flustered or angry reactions, he’ll just laugh and say you really do look like a cat.

His cute kitty~

He’s a curious boy- so rather than kissing the ears or petting them like the rest of the characters did, he will spend his overall time just feeling around them. Pinching the corners, seeing how you react, asking you if it hurts. It doesn’t, unless he’s being a bit too rough, but you don’t complain. His gloves feel really nice against the fluffy ears :)

Would act like a little kid after they get taken away, pouting and saying that he liked them. Would definitely end up giving you more head kisses after the entire experience though, mentioning sometimes how he misses them.

#genshin #genshin impact #genshin impact headcanons #genshin impact oneshot #childe x reader #genshin childe #genshin diluc #diluc x reader #genshin zhongli #zhongli x reader #kaeya ragnvindr #genshin kaeya #kaeya x reader #beidou #genshin beidou #beidou x reader #fluff #genshin fluff #cynshealthysfw

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bonkie-barnes · 3 years ago

Text

Spoons

natasha romanoff x gn!reader

word count: 2.1k

warnings: chronic illness, mention of medicine, self deprecating thoughts

A/N: this is me 1000% projecting about my guilt that comes with my chronic illnesses. they're kicking my ass rn. this is a vent fic, but if you resonate with this at all, i hope you enjoy :)

- - -

Beep. Beep. Beep.

The alarm clock on Natasha’s bedside table has been going off for a full minute already. You merely roll over and cover your head with Natasha’s pillow. It smells like her.

You have absolutely no energy to get up, let alone reach across the bed to turn the alarm off. Your head feels heavy and your body aches something terrible.

The list of chores you have to do around the house today sits uncomfortably in the back of your mind. The list of friends who have texted you about making plans to hang out sits there too. The idea of staying in bed all day sounds more and more appealing by the second. You know this because the alarm is still blaring into the otherwise peaceful morning air.

Just as you’re gathering the strength to sit up and turn the alarm off, Natasha walks in. She looks at her watch and her brow furrows in confusion.

“What are you doing, sleepyhead?” she asks you with a little smirk. There is concern in her eyes, though she masks it well.

You’re both fully aware the alarm has been going off for seven minutes straight now.

“Just tired, love. You know how much work it takes to reach over,” you say in a joking manner, hopeful that you can get past this without worrying her too much.

Natasha eyes you suspiciously for a second before giving in.

“How was your workout?” you ask her sincerely.

As she starts rambling about her morning activities, you feel a sense of shame. You’ve barely managed to wake up in the time it’s taken her to complete a full workout routine. Hell, you couldn’t even find it in you to turn the alarm off.

You finally focus on her rant as it comes to an end. Natasha is looking at you expectantly. Shit. She’s asked you a question.

“Huh?” you grunt.

She chuckles before answering, “I asked if you were ever going to get up and get in the shower, stinky.”

You put on a fake smile but fail to meet her eyes, the shame eating you up. It has been a few days since your last shower, but it’s just so hard to find the strength and energy to get up and stand in one place for more than a minute or two.

If Natasha notices the far away look in your eyes and the grimace on your mouth, she doesn’t say anything.

After one of the quickest and most unproductive showers you’ve ever taken, you find Natasha waiting for you in the kitchen. She’s taken it upon herself to make breakfast for you both.

You kiss her cheek and thank her as you sit down at the table. The warm cup of coffee she sets down in front of you is a godsend. The warmth emitting from the cup helps to diminish the pain in your knuckles, if only slightly. You send up a silent prayer to whomever might be listening that the caffeine will help with the fatigue today instead of making you sick.

Natasha sits down in the chair next to you with her own plate. She runs her eyes over you in a scrutinizing manner. She wants to think you don’t notice, but you do.

Clearing your throat in hopes to take her focus off you, you ask about her plans for the day.

“Oh, you know, mostly just busy work. I have a ton of paperwork to get through,” she tells you through an exaggerated sigh. “What about you?”

The list of chores screams at you again. “Mostly just some things around the house. Grocery shopping, laundry, boring shit like that.”

Natasha hums around a sip of her coffee. It surprised you just how much cream and sugar she takes in hers. It’s just one of the many unpredictable things about her that made you fall in love.

“Super exciting. I hate to miss out,” she teases you.

You crack a smile to appease her. Inside, though, you realize just how little she understands. These errands seem so simple to her, when to you, they are the most daunting of tasks.

You’re brought out of your thoughts by Natasha standing up to take her plate to the sink. She comes back to kiss your cheek and let you know she’s going to go get ready, before walking out of the room.

You suspect the amount of housework you’ll get done today will be minimal, so you decide to at least make Natasha some lunch. Maybe it will lessen the disappointment she feels when she comes home to see everything exactly as it was when she left, you think.

Your plan is halted as you’re making her sandwich. The stupid cover on the peanut butter jar is stuck. You can’t open it for the life of you. The guilt comes in like a tidal wave. You can’t even do something as simple as make lunch for her, your brain supplies for you.

Natasha returns from getting ready to see you standing in the kitchen with a glare on your tired face.

“What’d the peanut butter do to you this time,” she jokes.

“I can’t.” Tears well up in your eyes.

She comes up to wrap you in a hug from behind. She softly asks, “What can’t you do?”

“I can’t open the jar,” you mutter softly, feeling overwhelmingly embarrassed.

“It’s okay, love. Let me help,” she tells you delicately before kissing the spot under your ear. She can tell this is affecting you more than usual and wishes for nothing more than to be able to take away your distress.

You mutter a thank you before continuing to make her sandwich. You pack everything into a bag and write a small note to finish it off. You know Natasha loves the little messages you leave her periodically, and nothing will stop you from trying to make her as happy as you can.

Goodbyes are said as you both wander closer to the door. Natasha makes sure to hold you longer and tighter than usual. You don’t comment on that.

The silence that encompasses the room as soon as the love of your life leaves is suffocating. You can feel the exhaustion from purely getting up and getting ready creeping up on you. Logically, you know that you shouldn’t overexert yourself, but the shame is eating you up. Already on a roll, might as well keep on going, you think to yourself.

You go back to your mental to-do list and debate what to start with. The grocery store doesn’t sound terrible. Some sun would do you some good. It’s been a few days since you’ve seen the world that exists outside of your house.

Wandering back to the bedroom to get your phone and shoes, you try to push the fatigue from your mind. In your attempt to block out the tiredness, you fail to recognize the ever-present pain in your joints increasing. It’s only when you sit down and bend over to put your shoes on that you register the feeling. Your hips ache severely; so much so, that you can’t hold your position long enough to get your shoe on your foot.

This seems to be the straw that breaks the camel’s back, seeing as you immediately burst into tears. The pain mixed with your inability to do basic, everyday activities completely overwhelms you as you break down.

There’s absolutely no chance that you’re going to complete this task, let alone all the other ones on your list. You let out a sigh as you stand up and shuffle to your room, phone and shoes forgotten in the living room.

You let the weight of your emotions crush you as you climb into bed and under the covers, your wife’s pillow clutched closely to your chest.

Your tears cease to stop, even as you succumb to the sleep you so desperately wished to hold onto this morning.

- - -

Natasha comes home to an eerily silent house. On any typical day, she would come home to the noise of your favorite show or music softly playing, whether it be from a speaker or from your guitar. Your shared house consistently was filled with life and sound. It was one of her favorite parts of her day; coming home to you in your own element, laughing or singing. You are her home.

This newfound silence has her exceptionally worried. Even on your bad days, there was at least a laugh track coming from the TV or the smell of hot chocolate coming from the kitchen. Now, there’s absolutely nothing. For a split second, Natasha thinks that you may never have come back from the grocery. Her heart rate spikes. The sight of your phone on the coffee table and your shoes strewn haphazardly on the floor puts those worries to rest.

“Darling?” she calls from the entryway. There is no response. She carefully removes her boots and coat before moving through every room in the house, calling out for you softly in each.

She makes her way to the bedroom, lightly knocking on the door as she lets herself in. She sees the rise and fall of your chest and is filled with a sense of relief she didn't know she needed.

"Love? Are you awake?"

You grumble out an answer that could be understood as a 'yes'.

Natasha carefully sits down on the side of the bed that you are facing.

"Can you tell me what's going on?" she requests softly, in fear of upsetting the quiet environment of the bedroom and making things worse.

The tears that started up again when you wife called out the first time get even heavier somehow.

"Oh love, come here."

She carefully gathers you in her arms and rests your head on her chest.

"Does this have anything to do with the peanut butter jar this morning?"

You nod. One of your favorite things about your wife is her ability to observe and understand what you're going through.

"I just can't do anything today. Everything hurts and I'm so, so tired," you whisper, followed by a heartbreaking sob.

"It's okay love. Please don't cry," Natasha whispers back.

"But it's not! It's not okay!" You sit up from her chest to let out your rant. "You've done so much today and I could barely wake up. You work so hard and I should be able to do stuff around the house so you can come home and not have to worry about anything," you finish with a sigh.

Your wife puts her hand under your chin, forcing you to look in her direction. "Love, look at me. Believe me when I say that I don't care about the state of the laundry or if the pantry has been stocked. All I care about is you. All I want is for you to be okay. It's killing me that you feel like this and I can't do anything to take it away from you. What I can do, though, is tell you just how proud I am of you. You are the strongest person I know, and I work with the Avengers."

You giggled at that. Natasha smiles at your small second of happiness.

"Are you sure? Because I was going to get so much done today and I was trying to-"

Natasha cuts you off with a soft kiss.

"My love. Listen to me. All I care about is your health and happiness. If staying in bed and catching up on sleep is what you needed today, then that's all I expect from you. I never want you to hurt yourself trying to do more than you can. We all have limits. It’s okay to need a break some days. I love you and I am so very, very proud of you."

With a long look into her eyes, all you find is love and adoration directed towards you. There's no disgust or disappointment as you had anticipated.

"I love you too," you utter quietly.

Natasha smiles and leaves a long kiss on your forehead. "What if we got some pain killers and some food in you? We can even put on your favorite movie. Does that sound good?"

You nod. Natasha gets up to get you some medicine and to order some food, while you get your favorite movie loaded on the TV.

Later that night, when both your stomachs are full and your wife is obnoxiously singing along to the songs in the movie just to make you laugh, you realize just how loved you are.

You don't know how tomorrow will treat you, or the day after that. What you do know, however, is that Natasha will always be there to support and love you. Your pain level and ability to function is always an uncertainty, but your wife's love will never be.

- - -

A/N: as always, i try to keep it gender neutral. if you find a mistake, please let me know! feedback is appreciated! to all my chronic illness buddies out there: i love you, you've got this :)

taglist: @007giu

#natasha romanoff x gender neutral reader #natasha romanoff x gn!reader #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff #black widow #black widow x reader #marvel #marvel imagine #my fic #natasha romanoff x reader

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floraltypes · 3 years ago

Note

lots of innocent and not so innocent touches

With Dwayne Pride if you wright for him if you don't just Gibbs please <3

who - leroy jethro gibbs x reader

an - i’m sorry! i haven’t seen ncis new orleans, so i probably couldn’t write dwayne very well … hope this is okay, for some reason i had trouble writing it :/

please continue to send in asks !!

unedited :/

Blankets surrounded your body, your leg ontop of another while light snores left your mouth. Hair was messed up and a hand was slowly moving to stroke your cheek. The curtains allowed peaks of the sunlight to peak through in your bedroom. A man lying beside you in his sweatpants and old tee.

The grey haired, older, man kept his eyes on your peacefully sleeping face, truly enjoying whatever dream you were imagining. He made no move to remove your leg from the top of his, but did make a move to place his fingers above your face, lightly pushing some stray baby hairs away.

A part of him silently cursed to himself, wishing that he had learned how to work his phone better, then being able to snap a photo of this calming moment for his own purposes.

Gibbs wouldn’t admit it to you, but these moments were more important to him than working on a boat, or the thrill after finally catching a bastard. There was something so domestic, so calming, with these times spent together. Time for him to think to himself, and also have the one he loves so much be so close.

Time to think about the past, and wonder how he got lucky enough for it to land here. Though, he may have lost a lot, and they would never be forgotten, he was grateful for another opportunity at pure happiness.

But his time to enjoy the peacefulness soon ended with a ring of a cellphone, causing you to stir a bit in your sleep. You eventually opened your eyes, staring up at the man who now had the hand that was formally on your face, resting on your chest.

“What’s that?” You questioned, trying to sit up and rub your eyes. “Can you get it?”

“It’s your cellphone,” He answered, missing the warmth of your leg, now having it be moved to lay on the mattress itself.

“Mmk,” You mumbled, reaching over to your side table and grabbing it. Flipping the screen up, you moved it to your ear. “L/n,” You tried to make your morning voice sound more as your own.

“If it isn’t little Y/n!” A cheerful voice spoke loudly on the other line. “Ya miss me?”

“No. What do you need?” You rolled your eyes, getting off of the bed, Gibbs eyes traveling your body as you walked to your dresser, picking out a outfit. “Mhm, okay,” You nodded to yourself. “I’ll be there, text me the address. Oh. Never mind then. Bye.”

Gibbs got out of the bed, going to stand beside you. He silently observed as you rolled your eyes once again, opening another drawer, he snaked his arms around your waist and pulled you into his chest, a small kiss on the inside of your neck.

“Who’s that?”

“A old coworker.” You opened your underwear drawer, picking a pair for the day.

“Purple,” Gibbs commented, as you dropped the blue pair back into the others, reaching for the one he chose.

“Gosh, it’s like we really are married,” You laughed to yourself, looking back at his straight face. “Sorry, you would know too much about that. But that’s not my point, there is a dead marine there and that means we’ve got work.”

“You didn’t seem to happy to hear from him,” Gibbs unwrapped his arms as you moved to your closet, picking out a dress shirt.

“I wasn’t. He’s annoying and almost cost me my job at the time. But, it’s our job, we have to go, so grab your clothes in the bottom drawers,” You turned around and pointed at the dresser that held some of his items, now finding what you needed and beginning to change.

———————-

“If you are all interested to know… I spent the morning watching a old TV show airing about a classic comedic couple who travels the world with their adopted son,” Tony announced to no one in particular, sitting at his desk as the others sat at theirs.

Ziva had her arms crossed, leaning back in her chair a bit. McGee sat in his, rubbing his eyes and looking down at his phone.

“What did you do this morning, McGee?” Ziva looked over to McGee, watching as his eyebrows furrowed.

“Trying to work on my new writing.. but for my character, uh, Miranda, I need a good backstory for her, people are really grasping onto her character from the former story. I’ve read some things saying they think she’ll get with Gibbs, I mean Libbs!”

“Interesting,” Ziva tsked. “I read the story and your Miranda character, who is obviously Y/n, and I don’t see it.”

“You know nothing about romance, Ziva,” Tony waltzed over, his own coffee in hand and his face near hers. “I think no one expects you to think about who would get together. But, no, I don’t see Gibbs getting with someone like L/n who is very, you know-”

“I’m what, DiNozzo?” You walked in, moving straight to your desk as you placed your bag down.

“Amazing! I meant, you’re so great that someone like Gib-” Tony looked at Ziva’s eyes widen. “He’s right behind me, isn’t he?”

“Someone like me, now what’s that, DiNozzo?” Gibbs questioned.

“Uh-” Gibbs smacked the back of DiNozzos head, moving over to his own desk.

“Dead sailor, body is already getting examined by Ducky and some visitors are coming to drop off some of the evidence.” Gibbs informed everyone.

“They think this sailor had something to do with a past robbery and murder, a cold case,” You clarified.

“L/n!” A guy smiled widely, another girl following in pursuit behind him as he walked to you with his arms wide open. “It’s been too long,” He quickly hugged you, tightening his grip around your shoulders and moving his hands to cup your face. “You still look as beautiful as ever!”

“Y/n, is that your boyfriend?” Ziva inquired.

“He looks a little out of her leagu-” You shot DiNozzo a look. “Or not?”

“Ah no,” The man laughed. “Old coworkers, that is Lila and I’m Carson, nice to meet you guys.”

“If your old coworkers, you must have a ton of embarrassing stories about Y/n!” DiNozzo beamed, moving closer to Carson.

“Uh, a few,” He responded. “We only worked together for a year or two, some, but not a ton.”

“Some will do.”

“DiNozzo, we aren’t here to make friends we are here to solve a murder,” Gibbs shot him a look and hit the back of his head.

“Right, sorry, boss.” DiNozzo put his head down like a sad puppy dog and made his way back to his desk. The two visitors looked at the scene that had just happened oddly.

“We brought all of our evidence, not much, but something,” Lila announced, placing the box on the table now and taking some of it out. “Should we get started?”

“I’ll show you to Abby, she is our forensic analysts and will probably want to take a look at this stuff for herself,” McGee told Lila, putting the evidence back in the box and letting her grab it, soon walking towards the elevator.

“You think I could check out the body?” Carson asked you. “It might be good to see what he looked like more and talk with your doctor.”

“That makes sense, I’ll show you to him,” You smiled at your old coworker and took another way to Ducky’s area.

The both of you chatted on the way down, catching up with how things differ since you worked there and a bit about your new workplace here.

“I really thought you would be Jeremy, the one who called me. I was a bit worried,” You laughed, walking into Autopsy with Carson as Ducky moved near you.

“Hello, dear, who’s this?” Ducky questioned, Jimmy moved near his boss.

“Hey, Ducky, this is Carson. Carson, this is Doctor Mallard. He is a old coworker of mine, Ducky,” You told the older man. “That’s Jimmy, he is Ducky’s assistant.”

Ducky began to explain how the man had died, pointing out various things on the body and even putting in a few past experiences of his own into the conversation.

Soon the four of you had heard the doors open, turning around to catch the view of your boyfriend entering into the room and moving to stand right in between you and Carson.

“I just want to hear some of the explanation myself, you can continue, Ducky,” Gibbs commented, all of your eyes turning back onto Ducky who was back to talking.

You felt a warm, larger hand travel to the middle of your back, a thumb softly pressing into the fabric that covered your skin. You turned your head slightly to make eye contact with Gibbs, but he just continued to stare forward ignoring it.

It was like a goosebump went up your spine, yet it wasn’t not encouraged. It was a bit of a energetic feeling, so you rejoiced in the innocent touch, a sign he was there.

Eventually, Ducky was done with his long explanation and you were back to heading upstairs with Carson and Gibbs to do more research regarding the deadman and cold case.

“So, Y/n, I was thinking we could go out to lunch or something soon to really catch up, outside of work,” Carson mentioned while you three were on the elevator ride up.

You were surprised at his somewhat boldness to announce this in front of your boss (and boyfriend), but he was always a very open person, kind and open.

“That doesn’t sound too bad,” You replied.

“We are busy most afternoons.” Gibbs added. “So, if you plan it at some ridiculous time don’t expect my agent to be able to make it.”

The doors soon chimed open and Carson quickly left, making a bee line straight to Lila. Gibbs let you leave first, placing another palm against your back to secretly lead you back to where the desks were, even though you knew where you were going.

———————

The rest of the day was spent with much more working diligently. You all had made some progress but not enough, and you could tell it was really getting to Gibbs. He dismissed everyone and told them to come back in the early hours in the morning.

Gibbs had told you that he was going to stay and work on this some more, so you told him you would stay as well and order some food. Once Carson had heard that, he decided that he would do the same.

A hour later, three burgers arrive and you hand them out to the two other men, soon taking a bite into yours. A bit of the condiment had spewed onto the corners of your mouth, but your hunger caught up with you, continuing to avoid the feeling for a moment and just eat.

Carson caught the look of your messiness, breaking off into a small laugh, and you joining, him then making a joke about how this used to be a regular for you. Gibbs got up from his seat with a napkin and bent over a bit to wipe it away from your mouth.

It was certainly a small gesture, but had caught you and Carson off guard, the both of you quieting. You just stared back at him while he continued to eat with a pride grin on his lips, looking over the papers.

It seemed like a blessing from the sky when Gibbs had finally connected the pieces. Everyone was called back in to look over what he found and to excite a plan on how to continue. You all were able to get the murderer into custody and with old evidence and Ducky’s help you were able to identify he was the killer. With Abby’s help you were able to put him at the scene where your old coworkers cold case took place.

It was a relieving feeling that the case was solved and over. It was easy to tell that your current coworkers were also happy with the fact that your old ones were leaving for good. Having unfamiliar people in a familiar place is always a weird feeling for everyone.

You watched as everyone packed up their things to head home from the tiring few days of work. Standing up, you grabbed your bag and moved to Gibbs desk, chatting with him until Carson came over.

“It was nice working with you again,” He commented, you turned around to face him.

“It was. We make a good team.”

“We really do. I was wondering about that, uh, date?”

“Hm,” That had slipped your mind, and almost did once more when you felt a brush of a hand against your bottom, turning around to make eyes at your boyfriend. “Sorry, I actually have a boyfriend. But if you mean the lunch date to catch up, then I’d love to.”

“The second one,” He nodded, his cheeks brightening a bit at the dejection but also confirmation.

“Great,” You grinned, writing down your phone number and handing it to him. “Talk soon, bye.”

“Goodbye.”

You watched as Carson entered the elevator and soon disappeared, the office area looking very empty with the lights darkened a bit and only you and Gibbs being in the area.

“Glad he’s gone,” Gibbs laughed.

“I figured,” You laughed alongside with him. “I could tell by your touchiness at work, are you trying to let everyone know?”

“If I was, I would do something bolder. Didn’t Ducky ever tell you I used to be like DiNozzo?”

“Yeah, that would be a interesting time to see.”

“I think if I was that same man, we might’ve had sex right o-”

“Let’s get home, now,” You both soon left the workplace, hand in hand, laughing along at stories of the younger Gibbs and his flirty persona.

#gibbs x reader #leroy jethro gibbs #leroy x reader #leroy jethro gibbs x reader #ncis fanfiction #ncis fic #ncis x reader #ncis #ncis reader insert #gibbs x y/n #gibbs x you #gibbs #anthony dinozzo #ducky mallard #abby sciuto #timothy mcgee #ziva david #jimmy palmer

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