#i miss my therapist ugh
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connanro · 1 year ago
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sometimes i'm like “oh yeah i'm SUCH a catch. women DEFINITELY want me.” and then other times i remember that i have seventeen hundred problems, most of which are arguably my own fault, and am single for a reason (the reason being a woman didn’t want me that much lol)
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anonfromtheflight · 11 months ago
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Heeeeeey!
Thank you so much for the messages I got wondering if I was alright. I am! I just have the worst luck ever!
But at least I'm in good health? And alive. That's a win too. I'm just convinced more than ever that nothing good will ever happen to me without something horrible happening right after 😓
So I made it back to Santiago from home on Sunday night and all was well. But I got robbed on Monday! After work, rght outside a subway station! And not only the asshole took my cellphone, he punched me in the face to make me drop it!! 😒 I almost never take my phone out in public for security reasons but when my boss called, I answered because I thought I had left something important at work. But when I hung up while I was leaving the subway station, before I could put my phone back in my pocket, a huge dude came to towards me, punched me in the face and then left with my phone! 😩
It wasn't even a nice phone, it was basic af and I had it for three years, but it had my stuff and UGHHHH I had to go to the police and then to the hospital to get my face checked because my cheek swelled right away. At least he avoided my glasses? Oh and I had to block my phone number with the mobile company, my bank account because of the bank app and another banking app i use.
To make things worse, I left my tablet back at my mom's by mistake last weekend so I had no electronic device with my info to block my stuff myself. I had to ask my sister to do it and to post a message on instagram in case my friends got any weird messages and to let people know I wouldn't be available. And that if someone talked to them via whatsapp, it wasn't me.
I didn't think about her doing the same for me here, I didn't think anyone would notice or care oops, sorry for that 😬
AND UUUUGHHH I CAN'T BELIEVE I MISSED THE S3 RELEASE DATE ANNOUNCEMENT!!! At least I can enjoy the theories and gifs now 😑 I also can't believe I missed a WHOLE week of OMR beauty content with Omar looking gorgeous and downright sinful wtf
Now I'm back home because tomorrow I have to go vote, got my tablet back and blocked absolutely everything. At least since I sold my soul to google, I don't have to try to remember my passwords lol and could basically wipe everything from my phone remotely.
But yeah, I'm okay! I'm only sporting an ugly bruise on my face that makes me look like I'm part of the lamest fight club in existence.
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bunnihearted · 4 months ago
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#no but i actually hate that i made this blog to vent freely bc i have no other place to talk abt anything or my feelings or thoughts#and im a very isolated person and a shut in and i dont have a job or go to school successfully and i dont know anyone#like blah blah. i have struggled and im drowning in them all. like why the fuck cant ppl just comprehend that we all have different views o#life and the world? like 'wallowing' is .. i have heavy anxiety which is completely untreated and it gives me real bad suicidal ideation#if me complaining on a blog that im btw not forcing anyone to read helps me to stay alive and get my pain out... why does that matter to#other ppl?????? like why does other ppl get so mad seeing someone they dont know vent??#also this goes for everyone but u can literally have no idea abt all of a person's life#esp on here where all u see is like my text posts where i vent abt how i FEEL. bc i want to. ??? i want to do that so i do#u dont know the context u dont know my experiences or what has happened in my life or context#u dont know what has transpired between me and other ppl i vent abt#like u know fuck all. u dont have the right to pass judgement onto a stranger that doesnt even know u exist#and even if i complain on here bc i dont have a real life but i want to#u have no idea what im doing with the rest of my time???? im making lists im trying to look up info abt school and programs#im trying to read abt my mental health issues and im doing mindfulness and im going to the gym#i am trying!!! and u dont have any idea what i do or how i try and u dont have any right to judge me bc all u see is one part that is me#complaining bc this is what i use this blog for. genuinely i do not get why this is even a big deal or why anyone would follow or read smth#makes them irritated???????#idk.. i dont wanna disable anons and stuff (bc funnily enough no one ever says this stuff with their url 🤨) bc i dont wanna miss out on the#stuff but it is infuriating that i have nowhere to go no friends no therapist etc etc to talk#and this is all i have bc i want to vent !!!!!!! and then i have to be like ok now other ppl i dont even know#and who dont actually give a fuck abt me are gonna judge me and tell me im living incorrectly#and ive never gotten more such things than now? why do y'all hate that i vent abt losing out on my 1st love#and feeling heartbroken?????? what the fuck? that has nothing to do with anyone else but me? like genuinely wtf#i just wanna vent bc i feel like im drowning but now i feel like i cant bc ppl just judge and like ugh
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mewhenifreakit · 2 months ago
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curled up by the fire, tail waggin
#long day puppies in my phone long day#so so tired i dont have class tmr cos lecture not there so i get to sleep in yay but i wake up early anyways woah just dont Have to be up#going to try meet a friend because i feel like i havent seen anyon outside of college in months even tho its been 2 weeks#this old friend if mine kinda lowkey ditched me when he got a bucnh of new friends like 2 yesrs ago and hes been reaching out a lot to try#hangout and like hm im hurt abiut how he dropped me and he like genrally wasnt a great friend anyways:/ but i feel bad being kike i cant#hang but i also amnt even lyin genuinely cant hang i havent seen my best friend in so long i only see college and my home and therapist once#but also like ugh i dont like this guy i need him to not be beggin me to hang he could be reslly mean like too often but he was nice ..ugh#i wish there was a chill bot harsh way to cut domeone out like i dont hate u i just dont love u soz#and i love my friends so so deeply like i only have time for my besties who i would est whole if i could pike the way people talk about#their blorbo from my shows is how i feel talking about my friends like i want to squish them and poke em n kiss em their my little loves#so if i dont even like someone idk like i dont have time for people j dont love or who dont give a shit about me#hashtag being autistic and my 3 close friends are all also auttistic genuinly the 3 of them got diagnosed in the past 4 yesrs..dominos#i miss my friends wailing college too busy i miss my babies#n i feel really bad for not wanting to hang with this guy who litersllybdidnt care if i lived or died like a year ago#but now is all about me strangely#anyways hm will possible rant more ive had such a long day and nowmim currles on pillows in a bjg hoodie and its so good
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barkingangelbaby · 5 months ago
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venting so much i ran out of tags lmao
#i think im hallucinating ?????#i have my headphones on (listening to boyfeel on repeat n choppin up some paper)#and keep feeling / seeing shadows in my peripheral vision#im probably just dehydrated and having bad floaters but i dont like it :)#today has also been bad dramatically awful#life isn't serious there's no reason to feel this heavy#oop very emo thoughts incoming#life can't be meaningful or ill miss my parents too much but can't be meaningless or im living without them for nothing#im just. struggling very hard this year. idk#i had so much health bullshit going on for months that i put off going to a psych n now im so busy that it feels bad taking time off for it#and im also scared of getting on meds bc the idea of being dependent on something that i might not have access to is.. auuughhh#idk dude my adhd has been debilitating lately and i feel so stuck and sometimes i think i have ocd bc my compulsions are so fucking bad and#all my mental bullshit with my breathing has slowly been driving me wild and peaks my anxiety#and sometimes i worry abt being bipolar bc my mom's mom is and my mom's best friend told me she thought my mom might have been#bc the way my moods are so low or so high is exhausting it feels like i haven't had a “normal” day in so long#but also atp when im happy i feel manic bc idk how to healthily experience happiness anymore#idfk y'all !!!! im also very nonverbal these days#ugh and still going back n forth on telling my therapist ive been suicidal again bc i dont want him to have to report me or anything idk#a few months ago i made a joke about offing myself and he got rly serious n said he'd have to take action if im serious so im leaning no#like. i wouldnt actually kill myself. i just don't want to exist sometimes in this life#its just been very very very very very very very very very very very very very very hard lately without my parents or grandma#and even after all these years it's still heartwrenching to think about continuing to live this life without them#like. i just want to make them laugh. i just want to feel their arms around me in a warm hug. i just want to dance to their favorite songs.#i don't want to think of them and see their dead bodies anymore. i want to remember them healthy and smiling.#i would take care of them again in every lifetime but fuck dude. i just want to remember their good days instead of the end. can i please#please fucking invision them at their best. i want to remember the dad that played baseball and video games and whose laugh filled the room#i want to remember my grandma who was so sassy but kind. whose button nose crinkled when she smiled. who taught me to happily be dramatic#i don't want to remember them being frail. i want to forget the frustration i saw in their eyes. i want to forget seeing them struggle#(insert sadness about not remembering my mom at all)#just. fuck dude. my life is simple and i am safe so i shouldn't complain. but things feel so fucking hard sometimes. i feel so heartbroken
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one-abuse-survivor · 1 year ago
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Been feeling really fucking triggered for hours and I don't know how to deal with anything at the moment. Ugh. Why so many bad moments lately???
Also I recently (re-)realised that I keep randomly humming a song that I haven't heard in literal years. It was the only song my mother knew how to play on the piano and practised constantly. I haven't lived with her in over 5 years, though, and yet it's on loop inside my head at some point of practically every single fucking day of my life. Which doesn't have anything to do with why I'm triggered right now, but it's like. Why?!???!!?!?!?!!??!!
Brain stabbies bad bad bad bad bad bad I just want my mind to stop :((
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ten-million-things · 2 months ago
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coalburiedinwarmashes · 7 months ago
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First week working in the best place ever completed🤩
#so grateful for the 30 euro I found in my wallet and the half day Friday#yapping#clonturk art coming up to the submission of the leaving cert booklets what was I thinking get me out of there but also it’s so exciting woah#I feel exhausted and hateful… and yet. full of love and joy#grateful for coira and emma dn and nicole and rían who is the only one I believe doesn’t hate me#guys it’s kind of the best thing ever when u sugest something and the child’s eyes like genuinely light up and they’re like that’s#cool idea thank you and then like ugh they’re so much more willing to listen to you then woah I hope every child in the world lives a life#full of love and has some adult who cares to listen woah ugh especial love the queer kids who think it’s cool I have blue hair#but 6 hours straight standing and walking no sitting down ever is the worst#and hearing that the 6th years were talking shit also not fun but also so get it like of art worst ever I’d also hate if someone came in#trying to talk to me even if they were trying to help I’d have killed them so maybe I should be grateful#they’re all so cool tho shou out Bea and Sean especially#shout out Nathan the faggiest person I may ever have the pleasure of meeting#shout out my brothers friends who r chill and one of them up is doing a cool snake turtle sculpture sick#shout out Alice woah I should put full name damn but shout out everyone every I love them all#so freaking tired everyday and I come home and I can pt rest at all because constantly trying to get this house together like painting#cleaning radiators moving shit furniture is so heavy when ur core strength is gone from just standing all day#I miss my room and my kitchen boooooo change booooooooooo#my therapist is being very nice to me tho
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neverendingford · 8 months ago
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#tag talk#hey bitches. she's afk so mom said it's my turn with the body. feels good to be back. I hate half of you parasites and I'm blocking some#same with Instagram. bunch of fucking drones posting shitty memes and sending the most unfunny jokes possible. blocking most of you there#started the process of sorting some things out with her girlfriend because damn some things are unacceptable and you've gotta say something.#she gets to do the soft and useless damage control later I guess I don't fucking care. I'm not going to let us get disrespected like that.#she lets it slide but I'm done taking shit.#sent an angry email to our therapist last night as well because fucking hell how can you be so incompetent at your fucking job.#Jesus h Christ didn't you study this in school or something? yeah we've gone through multiple therapists sorry that makes you insecure???#you're not the first and from the looks of things you're not going to be the last either.#saw the psychiatrist this morning and bipolar confirmed I guess. we'll see whether the new meds make much of a difference.#I kind of don't want them to though. I like being out and finally able to sort our shit out.#feels good to finally message people and tell them how I feel. I don't get a voice much anymore#and ugh I hate having long hair so much but I have to keep it because she needs it so I'll put up with it for her sake but damn I miss short#short hair was genuinely so fucking good and the hassle of long hair is so stupidly intensive but gender dysphoria so whatever I guess#anyway bye you mouth breathers I'm off to go get this stupid-ass body showered#I hate having a penis too though. that's one thing we can both agree on. it's so stupid and it hangs out and the shape is so stupid#God should take constructive criticism and also mean criticism because I have some opinions about how shitty his design is#anyway. bye idiots#Fade is such a fucking good band they were such a good pick for the Deadman Wonderland op
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be-good-to-bugs · 1 year ago
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i dont WANT to have a headache
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vole-mon-amour · 1 year ago
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Can I just please have friends that I don't feel with like I'm too much? That I can share a lot of stuff with and not being told to take a pause or whatever because it's too much information?
I just need *one* close/closest friend. Maybe that's the problem, cause I don't have another one to turn to? But I can't fucking handle a lot of communication with different people. I can't.
I don't fucking get it.
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rosieobuttcheeks · 1 year ago
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I asked on fb (in queer exchange boston so my bad i guess) for therapists specializing in autism and literally everyone has recommended therapists who focus primarily on trans & gender care which is Not what i need (again my mistake) but literally i refuse to work with therapists who do gender affirming care because I’ve had too many of them force the focus of my care to gender shit (which i dont care about and didnt ask) and its just really exhausting and frustrating like why are my only options around here My Roommate Sock The Therapist and Rebecca Who’s Never Experienced Hardship In Her Life
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motheyes · 2 years ago
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i’m trying to think of stuff i need to work through
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Fucking hell i miss her so much
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haologram · 23 days ago
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Don't Hate, Litigate! ⚖️ MASTERLIST.
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Let's say...you're in a bit of a pinch. Maybe your wife wants to divorce you, or you've (allegedly) been involved in third-degree murder. You are entitled to an attorney - whether or not it's a good attorney is out of our control.
⚖️ Read your court report below! ↳ Off The Record: Some of these court reports contain graphic details of NSFW activities. If you're not comfortable reading these details, please look for the 🚨 to avoid said reports.
⚖️ Don't miss your court date! Sign up for our taglist here! ↳ Off The Record: The posting period for this collaboration is from October 25th, 2024 to January 25th, 2024. Please keep this in mind while you sign up for the taglist!
⚖️ A Note From The Judge: Thank you to all the lovely people invovled in making this happen. I am eternally proud of each and every one of you. This being said, I cannot believe I brewed this in less than 1hr about this because of that "AEGYO IN COURT!" tweet. Special thanks to Cam (highvern) for helping me develop this FOUR MONTHS AGO. Anyway, thank you all for making my first Seventeen collab incredible. I love you!
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Don't Hate, Litigate! - Choi Seungcheol. [🚨]
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⚖️ Court Reporter: Altair ( @haologram ) ⚖️ Submitted Evidence: Choi Seungcheol is smart - he is, he's gone through all of life's curveballs with his head held high and his girlfriend by his side. However, when six of the major curveballs just so happen to be the bar exam, he's not sure he can win. ⚖️ Witnesses: Paralegal!Choi Seungcheol x Law Student!Reader ⚖️ Exhibits: High School Sweethearts AU, DILF!Cheol. Angst, Fluff, Smut. ⚖️ Read Court Report Here!
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Family Practice - Yoon Jeonghan. [🚨]
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⚖️ Court Reporter: Cam ( @highvern ) ⚖️ Submitted Evidence: After separating from your high school sweetheart Jeonghan years ago, you're finally ready to start dating again. But he certainly isn't. ⚖️ Witnesses: Ex-Husband!Divorce Lawyer!Yoon Jeonghan x Ex-Wife!Couples Therapist!Reader ⚖️ Exhibits: Exes to Lovers/Second Chance Romance. Smut, Angst, Comedy. ⚖️ Read Court Report Here!
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Unveiling Hearts: The Law of Attraction - Joshua Hong. [🚨]
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⚖️ Court Reporter: Bee ( @idyllic-ghost ) ⚖️ Submitted Evidence: Two former law school rivals are forced to confront their past and present when they end up working together at the same firm. As old tensions resurface, their professional and personal lives become entangled, leading to unexpected challenges. Through rivalry and collaboration, they navigate the complexities of their relationship and careers, discovering that some connections are meant to be re-examined. ⚖️ Witnesses: Lawyer!Joshua Hong x Lawyer!Fem!Reader ⚖️ Exhibits: Rivals to Lovers, Coworkers to Lovers, Lawyer AU. Romance, Smut, Fluff, Angst. ⚖️ Read Court Report Here!
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How To Cancel Your Faustian Bargain - Wen Junhui. [🚨]
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⚖️ Court Reporter: Jewel ( @ugh-yoongi ) ⚖️ Submitted Evidence: As the devil, you’re more than happy to grant favors in exchange for someone’s soul, and you’re known for having the most iron-clad contracts around. Which is why Wen Junhui—the scene’s newest contract attorney hell-bent on returning all those souls you’ve acquired—is really starting to piss you off. ⚖️ Witnesses: Contract Attorney!Wen Junhui x Devil!Fem!Reader ⚖️ Exhibits: Enemies to Lovers, Lawyer AU. Crack, Fluff, Smut, ⚖️ Read Court Report Here!
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Elevatory - Kwon Soonyoung.
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⚖️ Court Reporter: Hana ( @wqnwoos ) ⚖️ Submitted Evidence: You were once in love with Kwon Soonyoung, and it’s incredibly hard to avoid that fact when he works literally two offices down from you. It’s even harder to avoid when you’re stuck in a broken elevator with him for hours, and he seems determined to dissect everything that went wrong three years ago. ⚖️ Witnesses: Lawyer!Kwon Soonyoung x Fem!Reader ⚖️ Exhibits: Exes AU, Coworkers AU. Angst, Fluff. ⚖️ Read Court Report Here!
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Legalities and Such - Jeon Wonwoo. [🚨]
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⚖️ Court Reporter: Yannie ( @wonuwoe ) ⚖️ Submitted Evidence: Wonwoo deliberately kept his distance from you, his best friend's little sister. Changkyun might be easygoing, but a secret Wonwoo found out during high school was enough for him to ignore your existence throughout university and law school. All that changes when Changkyun enlists his help that forces you both to work together for his sake; where Wonwoo finds himself wondering if he can still find the person he once rejected all those years ago. ⚖️ Witnesses: Lawyer!Jeon Wonwoo x COO!Fem!Reader ⚖️ Exhibits: Lawyer AU, Brother's Best Friend AU. Drama, Smut, Angst. ⚖️ Read Court Report Here!
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Killer Courtship - Lee Jihoon. [🚨]
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⚖️ Court Reporter: Nana ( @bitchlessdino ) ⚖️ Submitted Evidence: If you were lucky enough in love, you'd end the doomed engagement before it stirs up in inevitable divorce. If you were unlucky, however, you'd end up going to your divorce attorney ex for a different marriage you're trying to get out of. Bonus points if you're a murder suspect. ⚖️ Witnesses: Divorce Lawyer!Lee Jihoon x Ex-Fiancée!Fem!Reader ⚖️ Exhibits: Exes to Lovers, Second Chance Romance, Murder Mystery AU. Romance, Smut, Fluff, Angst. ⚖️ Read Court Report Here!
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Recess- Lee Seokmin. [🚨]
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⚖️ Court Reporter: Sky ( @drunk-on-dk ) ⚖️ Submitted Evidence: The day Seokmin passed the bar exam before you did was the beginning of your revenge story. He was always the less serious one, less studious, and, unfortunately for you, he won’t ever let you live it down. One day, when Seokmin is assigned a complex case, you are chosen as his co-counsel, and you can’t help but feel that tinge of annoyance you felt years ago. ⚖️ Witnesses: Attorney!Lee Seokmin x Attorney!Fem!Reader ⚖️ Exhibits: Lawyer AU, Coworkers to Lovers AU, Opposites Attract. Fluff, Angst, Smut. ⚖️ Read Court Report Here!
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The Accidents - Kim Mingyu. [🚨]
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⚖️ Court Reporter: Mitchie ( @seokgyuu ) ⚖️ Submitted Evidence: Mingyu loves being a lawyer. Feels like that job is made for him. At least until you join the company he works at and turn his life upside down by being… extremely clumsy. With every accident happening to you at work, Mingyu is convinced you‘re only on this earth to torment him. It doesn‘t help his case at all that you just so happen to be the cutest thing he‘s ever seen. ⚖️ Witnesses: Lawyer!Kim Mingyu x Fem!Reader ⚖️ Exhibits: Coworkers to Lovers, Romantic Comedy AU. Smut. ⚖️ Read Court Report Here!
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The Devil's Advocate - Xu Minghao. [🚨]
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⚖️ Court Reporter: Altair ( @haologram ) ⚖️ Submitted Evidence: Minghao is never going to be the first to admit he's unhappy in his loveless marriage. He married for convenience, sure, but he still cares about his wife and would never go out of his way to hurt her in any manner. That is, until you've suddenly begun catching his attention. ⚖️ Witnesses: Divorce Lawyer!Xu Minghao x Intern!Fem!Reader ⚖️ Exhibits: Coworkers to Lovers, Loveless Marriage AU. Angst, Romance, Smut. ⚖️ Read Court Report Here!
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Beyond The Yellow Tape - Boo Seungkwan. [🚨]
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⚖️ Court Reporter: Cam ( @dddino-saur ) ⚖️ Submitted Evidence: If there is one thing Y/N is good at, it’s unraveling a mystery. When her job as the writer behind an anonymous column for the crime magazine - Beyond The Yellow Tape - leads to her being assigned the coverage of a high profile murder trial, the very trial her best friend and roommate is the acting prosecuting attorney on, her secret becomes harder to keep hidden. Will the truth and things that have gone left unsaid be a line drawn in the sand? ⚖️ Witnesses: Criminal Attorney!Boo Seungkwan x Journalist!Fem!Reader ⚖️ Exhibits: Friends/Roommates to Lovers, Lawyer AU. Angst, Fluff, Suggestive. ⚖️ Read Court Report Here!
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Eyes That See The Truth - Hansol Vernon Chwe. [🚨]
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⚖️ Court Reporter: Nabi ( @jenoslutie ) ⚖️ Submitted Evidence: Things are never really easy for you, trials and tribulations may as well be on your resume. When things get too easy and you take 'young, wild and free' a little too far, you're faced with yet another nasty breakup and a custody battle. And to make matters worse? The person who has to fight for you (and strip you of all your money) just so happens to be your ex-boyfriend. ⚖️ Witnesses: Lawyer!Vernon Chwe x Ex!Reader ⚖️ Exhibits: Exes to Lovers AU, Single Parent AU. Angst, Smut, RomCom. ⚖️ Read Court Report Here!
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Risk Another Goodbye - Lee Chan. [🚨]
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⚖️ Court Reporter: Jess ( @the-boy-meets-evil ) ⚖️ Submitted Evidence: You're exactly where you want to be in your career. You're at a firm that feels perfect. Or it was. Enter: Lee Chan. It's been 3 years since you've seen the ex that broke your heart and now he's going to be working alongside you. ⚖️ Witnesses: Lawyer!Lee Chan x Lawyer!Reader ⚖️ Exhibits: Lawyer AU, Exes to Rivals/Coworkers to ???. Angst, Fluff, Smut. ⚖️ Read Court Report Here!
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HAOLOGRAM © 2024 [AS WELL AS EVERYONE ELSE MENTIONED ABOVE] || no translations, reposting or modifications are allowed. do not claim as your own. viewer discretion is advised. your media consumption is your responsibility.
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weirdtenderlove · 2 years ago
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fun sibling thing my sister invited me to her new apartment:D(i miss her cat i’m excited to see the goof again too)
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