#i miss my early days in the fandom were i enjoyed the popular characters and followed the popular opinion 😔 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

bougiebutchbitch · 1 year ago

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https://www.tumblr.com/avelera/733616528394715136/i-feel-like-one-unexpected-side-effect-in-the

Can I ask your opinion on this post I saw? Just really enjoy your critical input on things. It’s okay if you don’t answer this, I’m not trying to demand spoons you don’t have <3 thanks for reading

Hm! I think it's an interesting post for sure. And I think it's a valid vent to make, from someone who's obviously been in fandom for a very long time!

But I do think it misses A Lot Of Things Out in order to make its point.

I do agree with their point about how fandoms prefer 'potential' ships to the actuality. But. The exact same preference for 'ship bait' is common with loads of popular ships, regardless of whether they're queer or not. Mulder/Scully works so well because they never get together. There's a reason why House/Cuddy was teased for so many seasons before it became canon (and why they broke up pretty damn quickly after becoming established). Ditto with Garcia/Morgan in Criminal Minds, who flirt constantly but never progress to romantic interest.

The preference of viewers for 'will they/won't they' narratives is certainly not unique to queer media, and it is, in fact, well known and accepted across show writing? It's not just fans of queer ships who are lured in by the premise of 'ooooooh are they gonna kiss'.

I'm certainly not so keen on the subtle inference of this post (and the less-subtle inference of the comments) that queer people should Sit Down, Shut Up, And Just Be Grateful because a few years ago, there was so little canon queer rep. Like... That is exactly how progress stagnates. Do other queer people really think we should be happy with scraps tossed to us by studio executives, and thank them for daring to write about queer relationships in the first place?

Um. No?

Keep writing meta. Keep writing criticism. Keep pushing for better and better rep, and don't let anyone tell you 'it was worse in my day, so you should be thankful now'. That sort of subtle conservatism is really damaging, especially when it comes from within the queer community.

And just... Saying that Izzy was 'never even canonically established as queer' when he confessed his love for Edward, had a clearly established Toxic Past Romantic Relationship with him, was said by his crew to be in a "toxic relationship" with him, had a whole arc about accepting his queerness that ended in him dressing in drag and singing La Vie En Rose while his ex and his new boyfriend fucked, and had ridiculous amounts of gay tension with numerous men in the show, just because he never kissed a man on screen is....

Um.

Well, it's certainly A Take, I guess. But. Uh. Buddy. I think you may need to rewatch the show. The baseline for engaging in discussion of queer media should really be recognising that a character can be thoroughly established as queer without them kissing another guy.

And just on a more personal note: I and many other queer fans loved the Good Omens ending because it was perfectly in-character. From the start of the season, we were shown that these two characters love each other, and that is a love that has developed over centuries - but they also have a fundamentally opposing relationship with authority (Heaven in Aziraphale's case, Heaven and Hell in Crowley's). We are shown the chief conflict between them from very early on, and this crescendoes to create a dramatic, bittersweet, brutal, perfectly in-character finale.

OFMD could not be more different.

Most of the criticism of Ed/Stede in S2 is wholly from a storytelling perspective. Yes, it's a canonical central queer relationship; that's great. But like.... the development of that relationship was all over the place. They moved too quick. They agreed to slow down. They immediately had sex after this.

In itself, that's interesting!! That shows a lot about their characters! There's the potential for growth and progression here! Hell, I was happy when they broke up because they had different life goals, because it felt as if they had been building towards that point all season. I wanted them to be a happy endgame, yes, but I expected all that divergent character growth wouldn't be thrown away; that we would get Ed perhaps retiring while Stede stayed at sea, with the suggestion that they're in a long-distance relationship, or that when Stede is ready, he will join Ed. That could have worked really well!

Buuuuuuut.

Instead, Stede gave up on his life goals that have driven his character from the very start with literally 0 build up or in-character reasoning. They settled down together, after an entire season (two seasons, in fact....) of a show demonstrating how and why that wouldn't work. And we're supposed to view it as a 'happy ever after'.

In short: the problem is not nearly as simple as 'queer fans aren't satisfied with a queer relationship'. The problem is with the plot, the pacing, and (predominantly) the character writing. If Ed or Stede were a woman, I doubt anyone would feel differently.

Ed and Stede both went on a self-discovery arc, but that self-discovery was entirely 180'd for both of them in the final episode with only clumsy foreshadowing (mentioning the inn in the early episodes is.... not the sort of solid character development you need to lay if you want to make a character like Stede change the direction of their life so utterly!).

#more thots #may be a little blegh because I am a little blegh today

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flutishly · 2 years ago

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No spoilers for Headless: A Sleepy Hollow Story

Confession: I waited several weeks to watch Headless. I’ve been a fan of Shipwrecked Comedy for a very long time, but from Poe Party and on, I felt like I was fundamentally missing something that other fans seemed to have when I just wanted to enjoy the content. So, Headless waited.

But after a few weeks, I was curious. There were gifs, of course, and there was fan content, and none of it seemed to make any sense (as it should be, among the greatest of fandoms). And I remembered just how much Shipwrecked are excellent at their best, producing hilarious content. I watched the first episode, and was... not necessarily underwhelmed, but not captivated either. I told myself I’d keep watching eventually, but at whatever pace ended up happening. There was over a week between when I saw the first episode and the second. Another week until the third. Five more days until the fourth episode. The show finished its run.

I didn’t quite see spoilers, but I got the impression from the little bit that I absorbed that something cool had happened with the finale. Despite my lukewarm reception until this point (I was enjoying some of the humor, but again felt like I wasn’t getting the story, or like I was missing something), I decided to keep watching. “The Chaos in Court” was probably my least favorite episode, but I picked up the pace at this point and binged three episodes in a row. Things started falling into place. The plot moved forward, the threads were coming together, and I felt like I could finally grasp what story Headless was trying to tell. The show’s structure of having a “guest head of the week” began to feel valuable and not just like a silly gimmick to bring in different (popular?) actors.

The final two episodes nailed it for me - against my initial misgivings, Headless really is a great show. No, not all of its jokes land entirely, and yes, there’s a sometimes-tiring imbalance in the directing (despite excellent independent acting across the board, something in how actors interact didn’t always work for me), but seeing everything come together was nothing short of a joy. I laughed, I gasped, I grinned at my own successful guesses, and I felt the tug on my heartstrings in the best possible way.

I have not gone back to rewatch the early episodes. I haven’t felt any particular need to, because the show does a great job of re-contextualizing its own narrative within the story. The finale’s great twists work well because so much is said upfront or revealed with time (though it of course still left open some questions for the viewers). The ending is satisfying. How many stories can claim that?

More than that: The ending feels deserving of the show’s run. With one or two exceptions, Headless is precisely paced, making excellent use of its mostly 10-15 minute episodes. Headless is that rare webseries that also feels like it couldn’t really be on any other medium. It’s very much a show and not a movie, but it’s a show that isn’t aiming for the standard half hour TV comedy slot. Nor do these videos ever feel like they should be 2-8 minutes long, in the style of older webseries or vlogs. The fact that the episodes do still have breathing room in terms of their length also helps; a plot-heavy episode like “The Distractions at Dinner” wouldn’t have felt nearly as light on its feet as it did if not for its longer length, ironically. And while some episodes feel just a tad too gag-heavy (again, ”The Chaos at Court”... I don’t like cringe humor), they mostly roll along pleasantly. The fact that there’s also the parallel, not-remotely-plot-necessary Unsolved Babesteries episodes that are an extraordinary waste of time (if an amusing one... in moderation) only emphasizes how tight Headless’ storytelling is.

Ultimately, I liked Headless. I liked it a lot. I liked how things came together. I liked how the characters grew over this relatively short time-frame. I liked how things gained a deeper meaning as the story progressed. And yeah, it also made me laugh and smile and maybe blink away a tear or two. The writing ranges from “okay, this is a little too much for me” to “WOW, this is excellent”. Many of the actors are phenomenal in their nuances (or lack thereof, in some cases), with particular comedic asides that had me gasping for air. I can’t say the show is particularly thought-provoking in the classic sense, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t have depth. It doesn’t do much with its ultimate moral question (a missed opportunity, I think!), but at the same time... does it need to? It’s a webseries comedy adaptation of Sleepy Hollow!

If - like me - you’re on the fence about Headless, here’s my takeaway: Watch it. The show is entertaining, well-made, and rewarding. And it’s been stuck in my head for the three weeks since I finished watching it. I might just end up rewatching it sooner than I planned... hmm...

#headless: a sleepy hollow story #headless series #webseries #review #season analyses #commentary

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benwvatt · 2 years ago

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my 2022 writing year in review!

Thank you so much to @feeisamarshmallow for the tag!

1. Number of stories posted to Ao3: 32 separate stories! I was very fortunate to have a productive, joyful writing year, and I also started writing shorter stories rather than longer ones this year.

2. Word count this year: 74,396

3. Fandoms I wrote for: Avatar: The Last Airbender, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, Gilmore Girls, Grey’s Anatomy, Heartstopper, Murdoch Mysteries, Severance, Supergirl, The Fault in Our Stars, The Martian, Virgin River

4. Pairings: Aang/Katara, Sokka/Zuko, Jake Peralta/Amy Santiago, Rory Gilmore/Logan Huntzberger, Charlie Spring/Nick Nelson, William Murdoch/Julia Ogden, Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, Hazel Grace Lancaster/Augustus Waters, and Beth Johanssen/Chris Beck.

5. Stories with the most:

Kudos: i’ve been around the globe, found a diamond wrapped in gold (but it doesn’t shine like you) which is my Supercorp friendship bracelet story! I just finished it and I was so happy to be able to give it a satisfying, cute ending.

Bookmarks: same thing as above! this was a really popular story :)

Comment threads: to know you like the back of my hand, which is my collection of a dozen one-shots I wrote for Supercorp.

Word count: same thing as above! this fic was my longest this year, at 9,100 words total.

6. Work I’m most proud of (and why): I’m going to go with memories painted in much brighter ink, the Heartstopper fic I wrote about Nick and Charlie dealing with their negative relationships with Harry, who decides to apologize to them both for being a bully and a bad friend. That fic is also tied with please remind me to forget you for the story I’m most proud of (this one is my Murdoch Mysteries story about William and Julia reconciling after she marries the wrong guy.)

They were both really interesting missing-moments stories that included letters (I’m a big fan of epistolary communication! letters are so intimate and personal!) and I don’t think most other writers would have published something like this. It felt exciting and special to focus on these parts of canon and expand them, exploring the characters’ curiosity and heartbreak at the same time.

7. Work I’m least proud of (and why): Definitely i strung you a halo of stars, which is a collection of 4 stories I wrote for Supercorptober. I was really anxious and stressed when I wrote these stories, and I felt like I kind of had to “keep up” because it’s a fandom holiday and we had daily challenges. The writing became more about maximizing word count rather than enjoying writing, which is why I only did Supercorptober for about 5 days before quitting. I was just too busy and uninterested in the end.

8. Share or describe a favorite review you received: Oh, I have so many! @nostradamus0 is kind enough to leave screaming reviews on many things I write (thank you for that, friend) and I also got a lot of really lovely reviews on Supercorp stories I wrote about parental trauma or forgetting your native language or struggling with anxiety.

I really like to write hurt/comfort and fluff combined, and it was so nice to see that my stories were able to comfort other readers who were also dealing with stress and hurt.

Aaaaand I got so many lovely reviews on the fics I wrote for Kataang or Heartstopper. I love being able to write things that entertain and make people happy. I’m quite good with banter (it’s my main thing and the easiest thing for me to write) and I insert it wherever possible.

9. A time when writing was really, really hard: Supercorptober! I was pushing myself to do a monthly challenge when I had schoolwork and other stuff to deal with, and it just didn’t work out for me. I’m glad I quit so early. Quitting is good and quitters deserve hugs and chocolate. If you can’t sustain something, taking a step back and interrogating why is a good idea.

10. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: Helly R from Severance. She is amazing. I would die for her. I wrote about her in my reputation precedes me, a ficlet about her character growth, and I can’t say anything more without spoilers. Severance is the best tv show I’ve ever seen. I don’t usually like thrillers/horror but Severance is light on both and it’s just so GOOD at exploring the ways that capitalism will devour you from the inside out.

11. A favorite excerpt of your writing:

this is a scene from (whoever said I would find someone new) must’ve never met you, a Supercorp fic set at a southern bar where Supercorp have broken up in the beginning and they get back together by the end.

I really loved writing Lena’s experience at this bar, The Great Beyond, and creating OCs who are all friendly and loving. I’m also just ... weirdly excited to write the OCs falling in love with each other because they are all gay? And I love a good queer southern love story.

Fuck. She should’ve just turned into bed early instead of driving out here to the bar, The Great Beyond, to say hey and good evenin’ to the regulars. Tim probably groaned when he saw her. Marcie in the corner cheered gently when she walked in. Lena always dances with her when it’s eleven and they don’t wanna go home yet. And then there’s Lucas, about to get his first tattoo, and Connor who keeps his guitar in the backseat. Just in case he figures out the bridge of the song he’s been writing since last year, y’know. He and Tim came up with the chorus together.

Connor won’t tell you he plays but he can sing you a story, rock you to sleep, take you on an old-timer’s tour of dreamland. Lena’s been before. She’s seen the milestones and skipped them across the pond. The road on the way there’s a little rocky, but it’s nothing she can’t handle.

Ashley sits front and center, welcoming the warm glow of orange light. Steph tilts back in her chair and offers once again to braid Ashley’s hair, or perhaps Lena’s. Steph had been laid off from the beauty salon last month. No luck since.

Lena said yes once, on a Saturday when she found an old receipt from the time she and Kara went and got ice cream at Braum’s, and Steph wiped her tears away with a ratty napkin before twisting Lena’s hair into a Celtic knot.

“No, I’m Irish,” Lena blurted, “and I dunno if I’m a Celt-”

Steph laughed. “Who’ll ever know ‘cept for you?”

12. How did you grow as a writer this year: I started writing for different fandoms instead of being strict with myself about “the core fandoms” that I had to stick to! I wrote shorter stories (like, 1500 words or less) because I liked it and I didn’t have time to do a big multichap fic. I branched out. I had fun while writing. I wrote meta for Grey’s Anatomy and Virgin River. I quit writing for The Resident because that show took a SERIOUS downturn in quality recently, and I don’t ever want to watch it again (if you know, you know.)

This was a good year and I had so much fun writing shorter stories, and different stories for various tiny fandoms.

13. How do you hope to grow next year: I want to get better at not defining success through the number of hits/words/comments/etc. a story has. Stories are allowed to exist just as they are. Less popular stories aren’t “bad” or “not worth my time.”

I also hope to finish up some of my unfinished multichap stories, and mayyyybe write more for B99 (I only wrote 1 B99 story this year, and it was meta rather than fiction, which is a big change from previous years when I wrote a lot of peraltiago fic.) AND I want to keep writing whatever I want, even if that means writing for new fandoms that I’ve never tried before.

I like writing things out of love I’m not a good visual artist; I’m not good with textiles or gifs or drawing, and I often wish that I could translate the images in my head to art on a page. But fic is one of the ways that I like to give back to fandom, collaborate with fandom, meet people in fandom. I love that I can have a fleeting idea and publish a story about it in the next 12 hours.

14. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc):

@nostradamus0. It’s not even a question. He is lovely, and lets me scream at him about Kataang even though he’s never seen ATLA, and I can send him excerpts of my stories anytime.

15. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: EVERYTHING from real life shows up in my writing.

must’ve never met you was inspired by neotraditional country music of the 2010s/2020s (it’s great! it’s making a comeback!!!)

many of my supercorp fics are inspired by my cats and my narwhal painting (technically, it’s a poster of whales, but there’s a narwhal in there) and my desperate desire to have a lamp shaped like a jellyfish.

I constantly write scenes where people bake because I get frantic if I don’t bake for several days. Oh, and I also constantly write scenes where people daydream and write letters/letters and cherish the softness of their homes because I’m a gentle person.

16. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: Uh, overusing italics is a really bad idea because it ruins the flow of your sentences. Getting a good flow often involves reading your work in your head so you can imagine the ups and downs of the words.

Writing takes time and you’re allowed to be frustrated that you’re not “better.” Give yourself time and space. Write as often or as rarely as you want.

Write down fic titles and AU ideas in a list in Google Docs because you may want them later. Don’t be afraid to be silly or gloomy or whatever; this is your blank page! Your words are the ink!!!!

Reading other people’s work, whether a published book or a fic or stuff like poetry, is a great way to get better at writing. Offering to be someone else’s beta reader, such as on AO3, is often a great way to make friends and learn more about writing. Oh, and try not to judge your writing too harshly. You still have so many good things waiting for you.

17. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: hmmmmmm I do have 2 peraltiago AUs (the you’ve got mail AU and the Jake-is-undercover AU) that I want to finish sometime in the future.

I also have several ATLA stories that are random memory-tangle-ideas (the Aang-Spiderman AU, the Katara is undercover as both a Kyoshi Warrior and the Painted Lady AU, the Kataang Mulan AU, the Zukka turtleduck petting zoo AU, the Zuko-emotional-support-dragon story) that I hope to write eventually! Or, at least, they will stay good dreams.

18. Tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read:

@nostradamus0, @chocomd, @flameohotwife, @dearestpartnerofgreatness

and anyone else who wants to participate! If you see this, you are free to do this tag if you like! <3

#benwvatt #fanfic #ao3 #tumblr #supercorp #supergirl #Lena x Kara #writing

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girlfailure-anita · 2 months ago

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Dear Festividder... (Festivids 2024)

Thank you most kindly for creating a video for me! I really appreciate your time and effort :)

General: I am such a shipper, but watch just about anything for a fandom. From crack to character studies to AUs to friendship/family vids. I have omnivorous taste. In fact, one thing I miss from early YouTube days were the trailer AUs, where the audio for a movie would be the basis of the vid (examples: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zXzMFMhi3tg or https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TTV6ubfQJcI ). That was such a marvel to me as a teen and really inspired my love of vidding.

Music/Audio: If it fits the tone of the video, then it is the right one. Anything old or new, popular or niche, original or cover. It doesn’t even have to be music, as seen above. If it inspires the work, please feel free to use it. I have discovered countless songs bc of fanvids and I love works from genres I rarely stray into.

I have one caveat: If you want to utilize the dialogue of the fandom/content in your work, I do prefer instrumental pieces. I’m just really sensitive to when lyrics and dialogue overlap, even when there are subtitles, and find it difficult to discern between them otherwise.

Individual Fandoms

Willow (2022)- Wow, I love women. The show getting cancelled was one thing, but removing it from the streaming service was truly evil. Just about anything related to this fandom would do, but I prefer the characters Dove/Elora, Kit and Jade. If you wanna make any shipping content (some f/f? 👀👀👀), I’d be down.

Road to Avonlea (TV Show)- If you feel up to vidding this show, I would accept anything, though I have always been more of a Izzy/Felix girl. And it would be nice to see something that wasn’t Gus and Felicity... But if that is what speaks to you, create to your heart's content!

Spy (2015) [SAFETY]- I worked at a movie theatre when this came out and saw the end before seeing the beginning. Because of that, I am full in on Susan Cooper/Rick Ford, though any ship would do. I really enjoy the music from this film as well (Mika, Verka Serduchka, Gin Wigmore, etc) so if it was utilized in the creation process, it would be super cute!

Stardew Valley (Video Game)- I kinda just put this here because I could. I know this would be especially difficult to vid, but just about anything with any farmer/bachelor/bachelorette/townsfolk. If you wanna be more specific though, I enjoy Harvey, Leah, and Willy the most. You could even include mods if you want. Possibly getting to see the opportunities in vidding is why this is here.

Annihilation (2018 Garland) [SAFETY]- An incredible film with a lot of interesting characters and techniques that could be explored through a vid. I really enjoyed the five women’s relationship/dynamic, but anything is on the table for this: from something more mellow to playing into the body-horror.

Pushing Daisies- Kristen Chenoweth as Olive was certainly my favourite part of this show, but I found the characters and atmosphere incredibly charming. I think something beyond Chuck/Ned shipping would be nice to see, especially because I didn’t really care for them as a couple. I was always holding out hope for Olive/Ned. That said, I really liked Chuck as an individual and was excited to see her personal story lines taking off beyond Ned. Also Lee Pace as Ned was such a performance! Anyways-- Please feel free to make something that speaks to you. Because if you enjoy making it, I will enjoy watching it :)

#festivids 2024

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spooky-raccoon · 8 months ago

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Early in the clown fandom, Rufo the Clown had taken stage for some of us and people got to see and know of the other horror clowns in the genre.

And other wonderful writers in the genre.

Rufo, amongst other popular characters such as his rival Jonathan Crowley, was created by the man, James A. Moore. I am very happy to say I got to know James a bit when one day he took a peak into the fandom world and had seen his murderous clown had a good number of fans. Fans who were creating in all sorts of ways.

James loved nothing more than to see people write. To tell a story. To see their work come to life. He had such a delight seeing everything that was made.

In the unfortunate news, James passed away March 27th from his battle with cancer.

I would love nothing more than for more love and passion for creativity to be shared and spread out. If you can, find his work and support it. He wrote over 50+ stories not only for horror but mystery, Sci fi, and even aided in comics and tabletop games. He had many books of collaborative pieces with other authors and friends.

James and his work meant very much to me. I had gotten into writing from the Pennywise fandom, but when James told me he liked my work, that's what kept me going. To know the man I admired and writing gave me chills had enjoyed words I created, which has lit such a spark in me that I will make sure never goes out. He had inspired so many, and I hope he will continue to inspire for future generations of authors.

James, you will be dearly missed. I wish there had been a chance for us to meet, especially waltzing into the horror cons you'd go to as your clown, Rufo. I know I wouldn't have been a very tall Rufo, but that's the hoot of it. Maybe one day I will still be down the years from now. We just have to wait longer to get to meet.

Rest easy, my friend. Gray skies are gonna clear up ❤️🎪🩵

#james a moore #rufo the clown #rufo #jonathan crowley #one bad week #serenity falls #smile no more #the seven forges #horror author #death #there is so much i wish i could change #theres a scream in my chest and my heard hurts from the crying #i hope youre resting well now james #you are so loved and missed

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lostcauses-noregrets · 2 years ago

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Hi Lost!

I've been in the eruri fandom relatively recently, yet I found myself very much in what you and someone else said on Twitter about not feeling connected to the new turn taken by the fandom. While I still enjoy the amazing fanworks, sometimes it's hard to find people who share my vision of the dynamics and characterisation of these two characters.

My question is: how do you think it has changed from a few years ago?

Unfortunately, I didn't live through the 'golden age' of the time when Erwin was still alive in the manga/anime, but having read a considerable amount of fanfiction (especially the good old ones), I couldn't help but notice a huge change in the interpretation of the characters, especially on Twitter. I'm pretty sure that the popularity of certain headcanons is a result of the "Twitter dynamics", since I noticed it happen in other fandoms as well - sometimes it was necessary to take a step back and enjoy my characters and ships in a small corner to not ruin my love for them.

Sorry to bother you (and sorry for my English!), I'm very curious to know your opinion!

Anon asked:

Hello Lost! I noticed the talk on twitter regarding the Eruri fandom having changed and I would love to get your insight on this. I’m one of the newer fans (only a year) so my perspective isn’t as broad. I do personally have noticed sides of the fandom where their traits are represented differently, but I felt like the overall perception is Eruri being a very healthy, loving and balanced ship. Just the perfect one really <3 I love your works and hope you don’t feel alienated!

I hope you don’t mind me answering these two asks together, because they’re both referring to a slightly throw away comment I made in response to a friend on twitter yesterday about how the current popular interpretation of the characters is very different from the one I fell in love with.

Before I go any further, this absolutely isn’t about policing anyone’s interpretation of the characters. There is no “right” or “wrong” way to write Erwin and Levi’s characters, fandom is all about transformative works. Everyone is free to read and write whatever they want and I would absolutely encourage them to do so. The Eruri fandom is a big diverse space, and it’s been amazing to see the new influx of fans over the last couple of years. I’m sure we’ll be welcoming even more when the final season of the anime starts airing.

Understandably though, the fandom’s perception(s) of the characters has changed and evolved over time as the canon storylines developed. Once the manga ended though, and plot lines and character arcs were resolved (more or less), characters were freed from the canon storyline and characterisation to some extent. Fandom has always been about transformation so it’s to be expected that popular fanon characterization will drift from canon over time once the source material has ended. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, it just means that the popularity of different tropes can differ wildly depending on the point that you join a particular fandom. For example it wasn’t uncommon for Erwin to be portrayed as cold, ruthless and manipulative in the early days of the fandom, which is hardly surprising because there wasn’t a great deal to go on. Once Isayama really started exploring his character from the Uprising Arc onwards, he tended to be portrayed much more sympathetically and with greater depth. More recently, ruthless manipulative Erwin tropes have had a resurgence of popularity in Marley set fics. I’m not a huge fan of this trope because it kinda gives me dejavu, but I can appreciate why other fans enjoy exploring it. It’s just not for me.

If change is inevitable in fandom, so is nostalgia. Whenever you join an active fandom, there’s always a bit of a feeling that you’ve missed out on the glory days. At the same time, as the fandom moves on, you’re likely to find yourself harking back to your own glory days. I think this is also why there is a tendency to feel that a fandom is “dying” when in actual fact it’s usually just changing.

From my perspective, I came to the SnK in late 2015 and followed the manga and related canon content from about chapter 78 onwards, so Midnight Sun and the serum bowl was one of the defining moments of the fandom for me. It irrevocably coloured my perception of Erwin and Levi’s relationship with each other, and also their relationship to the Shiganshina Trio. Though I would never want to live through that pain again, I can’t help having a fondness for fics that were written around that time. I also freely confess to being very picky, and a bit stuck in my ways when it comes to the fic I read and write. I tend to read fics I love over and over again, which is one of the reasons I’ve always felt I’m the absolute worst person to be doing fic recs!

Anyway, thank you both for your kind asks, you're both very sweet. I have no doubt that the Eruri fandom will continue changing and evolving, and I hope you enjoy your time here with this amazing ship. Whether I’m in step or out of step with the popular tropes of the day doesn’t greatly matter, I’m just going to be here doing my thing for a little while longer at least.

PS @stand-on-the-horizon I forgot to add, I think you're absolutely right about the effect of "Twitter dymanics" on the ubiquity of certain character tropes. And I also agree 1000% that fandom is best experienced by finding a small group of weirdos who enjoy the same characterisation, kinks and tropes as you and hanging out with them.

#asks #fandom #eruri #snk

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sepublic · 3 years ago

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TOH deserves better

Y’know what?

Now that I’ve… Had time to really focus and think and process about the news for The Owl House and its shortened Season 3, now that I’ve really dealt with other things in my life, I’m…

I’m angry. I’m genuinely MAD…

The Owl House has always been a comfort show for me! It’s a show I’ve loved, its characters and worldbuilding and mystery is fascinating to me and it’s inspired me! When Season 1 ended... I was excited. I was prepared. I braced myself for the story that Dana Terrace and the writers intended to tell us. I knew we had at LEAST two more full seasons to go, based on Dana’s comment about a third season.

Season 2 would’ve been a safe season in a sense. A season where we’re in the middle of the action, where we can get onto things that have been planned and set up; But at the same time, it’s not the final season! It’s not the end. There would’ve been an entire, full season, twenty or something episodes after that. I could’ve sat back and enjoyed Season 2 in all its entirety, as another phase of the story set in the middle, and when it was all said and done, I could speculate and hope and wish and think about this final third season; Assuming we wouldn’t even get a fourth!

But no… NO, Season 3 is literally just. THREE episodes, each twice the normal length, so like six episodes; But still, it’s obvious with how it’s formatted into a trio that Season 3 will be less a season, and more the final battle and climax of the show, the culmination of everything else! Which means for all intents and purposes… Season 2 IS the final season of the show. That everything we want to see, we hope to see; It can only happen in Season 2, because Season 3 is the final battle in a sense.

Warning: A LOT of text and upset ramblings below!!!

And that deeply angers me. I’ve done the calculations and there are fourteen episodes we’re missing out on, due to Season 3 being cut down. Fourteen episodes to do any wide variety of things; To focus on side characters, to flesh out lore and plot. To extend and focus on character arcs, to introduce and establish things; Fourteen episodes to introduce, develop, and finish various arcs and smaller plots! There’s SO much to do in fourteen episodes, especially in regards to relationships, and even representation as we talk about Luz and Amity and everyone else!

And out of NOWHERE, out of the blue- We don’t get that! Dana Terrace herself admitted on Twitter that she left in December to focus on the news. I’m not entirely sure on how production works, but I imagine she and the crew were working on Season 2A when they got this news… Which means they’re going to have to COMPLETELY rehaul and rehash their plans for Season 2B as a result. They’re going to have to hastily pull together and rush the arcs they had planned out, so it can lead up to Season 3.

They expected fourteen episodes of development; And now they have to resolve that within the remaining ten or so episodes of Season 2, which is already jam-packed with the original plans. At this point, any criticisms for the show’s writing or pacing that might come later down the line… I can’t take it seriously in good faith. Not when I know how Disney just screwed over Dana and the crew so suddenly, so abruptly, so HUGELY. Season 2 was supposed to be the mid-point, and you KNOW there are a bunch of arcs and little plot points that will never see the light of day, or be rushed, to accommodate the change!

And it really angers me. Season 3 would’ve been made after a lot of fandom response- So all you fans of the Detention Kids, who would’ve liked to see more of them? Season 3 would’ve been the time for Dana and the crew to throw the fandom a bone… EXCEPT, because it’s only three/six episodes, there’s no way the Detention Kids will get focus now. Not when there’s the actual climax of the show left. There’s no room to have fun, to focus on side characters or expand even more on pre-established ones. Fourteen episodes’ worth of kind, small little moments that stand out- Gone, down the drain, never to see the light of day to begin with!

I just… Feel so BAD for Dana and the crew; Dana fought so hard for this story! Her roommate said that nobody wanted to see a story about an old witch and her young apprentice, and you know what, Dana FOUGHT for that story and got it for us! She had to deal with censors for Lumity, but she fought for that! Dana and the crew were EXCITED to tell us, they no doubt had so much planned and in store, you can tell from the tone of the Reddit AMA and the Charity Livestream, all of which were done months before Disney told Dana and the crew about Season 3 being downsized.

And like… Dana herself said that she’s still down to do future Owl House content. If Disney asks her to –with pushback from fans- then yeah, she could do more! We might get an epilogue or sequel series… But that doesn’t change how the pacing of the show will be disrupted. How a lot of arcs will have to be prematurely rushed through and finished, instead of having the loving time taken to develop and appreciate them.

Characters will be rushed through, we had FOURTEEN episodes taken from us! Characters like Belos or Kikimora, or Odalia and Alador, the antagonists- They’re not guaranteed to survive or make it past the end of Season 3, so even if we got more content post-S3, it wouldn’t really be able to remedy for their drastically-shortened screen time, unless through flashbacks or resurrection or whatever. Characters, arcs, development, all are being shafted here.

And this ANGERS me! Like I said, The Owl House is my comfort show. I finished Season 1 with the full understanding that we weren’t even halfway through yet; We still had SO much more to do, so much more to see, amidst all of the wonders that Season 1 had provided! But now I feel cheated. I feel cheated, because sike! Actually you WERE halfway through, and that changes everything about the tone, the pacing, the setting of the show. Suddenly I’m already looking forward to and anticipating the end, because the end is DIRECTLY after Season 2; And I can’t enjoy it as much, because now I have that anxiety and dread as Season 2 ends that… THIS is the final, full, regular season.

It was just supposed to be another season for me to enjoy, to further flesh out the show- And out of nowhere, I have to approach this with a sudden sense of finality, I’m forced to really appreciate it even further, because this is it! This is all we have left, when until then, I thought we had so much more! And it’s angering. It’s abrupt. Season 2 was in many ways supposed to be carefree and hands-off…

But now, I have to approach it in an existential sense. With the full understanding that the show is essentially ENDING by this point, with each new episode, we’re on a timer now. We’ve lost the luxury of Season 1, that Season 2 would’ve had, if it was the midpoint in the series. And now I can’t enjoy things as much because just as quickly as I got these new arcs and characters and developments, I have to watch them be quickly wrapped up.

I barely even got them, I was looking forward to more of it, there should’ve been more, and then bam! It’s already done, just kidding! Like it was handed to me, and then abruptly torn out of my hands barely a few seconds later, after I’d anticipated an entire day alone with it.

I hate this. I’m angry, I’m sad, I’m disappointed. I had so much wonder and joy that this was only the beginning, but now it’s actually the ending! I had so much to look forward to, so much promised- And this show was doing well! It was SUCCESSFUL, Lumity brought a HUGE influx of popularity, and you know what? The show deserves that!

Not just for being good in general, but also- This is SUCH a huge step forward in representation, especially given how this is DISNEY of all channels… With Luz being a bisexual, ADHD, character of color! Amity fully being a lesbian ON-SCREEN, no censors, nothing held back, her crush treated and fully indulged the way a straight person’s would’ve been!

The Owl House deserves so much for just that alone. So much attention, and it got attention, it was arguably at a peak because now so much fans are tuning in… And Disney, those paradoxical cowards, they decide to end it early!? I’m angry. I’m frustrated, I’m sad, I was told to expect more, to just enjoy myself in the moment, but now I have to readjust my sense and perception of everything in anticipation of a sudden end.

And I’m sure that’s what Dana and the crew have to do as well, they were so excited, no doubt planting things in Season 2A to be resolved later in Season 3… But nope, now they have to rush it through and finish it in Season 2B, along with everything else they had planned! And they might have to cut out stuff from Season 2B, to make room for the ending of those pre-established arcs!

It’s frustrating and clumsy and sudden, and it just… ANGERS ME! It makes me genuinely mad and frustrated, like I want to punch a wall… And I hate it! And a part of me hopes and wishes that if the fans really DO give enough of a backlash and demand, maybe Disney will change its mind.

If we say enough, ASAP, then maybe Disney will delay Season 2B so that Season 3 can be extended back to its proper length, allowing Dana and the crew to redo Season 2B as they originally intended. I’d be fine with waiting additional time, as much as the crew needs, to redo Season 2B with the understanding that they have that full third season back!

I’d GLADLY, happily, let the crew take their time to redo Season 2B to its original glory and plans, to better set up a full Season 3! I’d let them take their time, I wouldn’t complain at all, I’d still watch! So Disney, go ahead, change your plans abruptly AGAIN, it’s not like you have no qualms screwing over this show or other content creators with this kind of back-and-forth, look at Matt Braly having to contend with True Colors being delayed and almost censored, only for the whole thing to be useless because the original episode was leaked anyway! He had to rush out the Season 3 intro, I’m betting this RIGHT now!

But even if it was delayed, even if it was released early… It doesn’t change the actual show itself. It doesn’t change the actual story, just how it was presented- But the story itself, it remains intact. The Owl House doesn’t even get that. Brevity can be the soul of wit, but if you’re suddenly told out of nowhere to chop it down, it’s not gonna be the soul of anything.

It’s just… SO UNFAIR, and it makes me genuinely pissed off. Like, I could handle True Colors being delayed by the end of the day, because the show is otherwise the exact same- But TOH being so drastically reduced, abruptly shortened, I think that’s honestly objectively worse… So I braced myself for and adapted to one bad thing, and then got another thing even MORE terrible! Much more terrible, in fact- Amazing.

I’m just… Tired and frustrated. Like it feels like I had this happy thing in my life and it was taken away from me, I can’t even have that, I can’t have the hope and anticipation for more, that’s it! It’s already done and gone! I knew I’d have to prepare for that eventually, but in a manner that felt fleshed-out and well-rounded, like I’d really had my time to enjoy and appreciate… But just kidding! It’s like a punch in the face, and it makes me honestly depressed and sad, and I kind of don’t know what to do besides… Ask for more, and hope?

A part of me feels like the investment, the enjoyment, was lowkey all for nothing, meaningless and worthless, now that so much was cut down- And obviously it IS worth it, it always is! But in the moment of despair, I’m asking… Is that it? It was all for nothing, then… All that effort. All of that speculation and enjoyment and anticipation.

All you had look forward to, all of that emotion you put in- So much of it is going to be left unresolved because how the show was so enormously cut down. And now it makes me hesitant to invest in other shows, I’m afraid, in case they get cut down like this, in case my attention is punished and deprived for engaging with the material like that to begin with.

As a viewer and someone who loves and enjoys media, I feel like there’s a trust that’s being breached, I can’t really rely or depend on things I enjoy to last or stay there, so why bother getting invested? Why put in the effort for fandom and content if it’s going to be gone like THAT, if all plans are thrown out the window, and all attention and feedback is meaningless!

What’s the point of showing that you love this, of expressing yourself, if you’re going to get even LESS than what you’d cautiously hoped for? Why hope at all? There’s this bitterness left inside of me, that you shouldn’t have bothered enjoying or getting invested, or pouring yourself into this, because in the end you weren’t going to get anything close to that.

Which, fan content is ALWAYS valid! But it’s usually done to expand on stuff that’s already there… But if there was nothing there because it got pulled last second, then why bother? Why enjoy if it’s so brief? Why invest if the conclusion is so sudden and out of nowhere? Why care at all? And I know that shouldn’t change how I feel…

But with Infinity Train and Amphibia, I guess I really can’t count on anything, not even the mutual solidarity of numbers, to change a thing. So why hope for and ask for more and better? Why even enjoy what I have, knowing it’ll be cut off by itself in the future because the planned arcs were forcibly dropped? I can’t enjoy an episode as part of a larger story now, just a shorter one, and now there’s this pressure.

Pressure, that’s it- A pressure on the show. A pressure on the writers and audience. To suddenly cram in and make the most of this time. Pressure on every Season 2 episode to go above and beyond to make up for the almost complete and utter lack of Season 3; Season 2 will practically have to carry the weight of TWO seasons on its back, two condensed into one! And it just… There’s so much pressure. No time to breathe or enjoy myself or relax, because now it’s all suddenly ending and fleeting in front of my eyes when I hadn’t done that, and now I go back and yell “Come back!”

I wish I’d enjoyed it more knowing it was already ending, but it’s too late. I wish I could’ve done something, but what could I have done? And I really did try to appreciate and cherish this to my ability, but I did so expecting more, as I should’ve- And now it feels I didn’t do enough. I feel cheated. Like the rug was pulled under me, that my effort was rendered naught and never enough no matter how hard I tried, the game is rigged.

I’m frantic. I’m paranoid. I’m already having to say goodbye and brace myself for the end, when I expected at least another full year to unapologetically not have to worry about that, to just be in my zone and be myself and ENJOY… To not have to worry existentially like that. I can’t have that peace, I can’t have that longing, lasting fun.

I knew it’d come to an end, but now I can’t have the time to properly enjoy and relax and appreciate it, to truly live it out meaningfully and deliberately… I’m going to have to laser-focus now and put aside other things, because this thing is NOW and won’t last, unlike the rest; And in a way, that kind of rush and pressure, it just ends up paradoxically making the whole thing LESS fun, even!

So in my attempts to appreciate and enjoy it more, I enjoy it less. It’s like a punch in the face in direct retaliation for getting invested and attached, for actually being connected to the story. I’m being punished for enjoying, for letting myself feel, so why ever bother with that, ever again? Why should I get attached? I’m just punished for that, so I won’t bother. I won’t put myself out there so even if it DOES see itself through, I won’t have been there for it from justified paranoia, and then I’ll miss out when it IS there. Like I can’t win, no matter what- So why participate?

It doesn’t matter, it’s all useless. “It makes me happy”, well, maybe that’s no longer even a reason to do and make and enjoy things anymore, huh! And now I’m just… Bitterly putting it aside. Feeling like I should’ve known better, that at least I’m being more ‘mature’. I feel like Luz in the first episode, throwing her book away, her prized hyperfixation that invigorated and brought so much meaning to her… I feel like Luz, just almost apathetically, in resignation, throwing it into the trash while someone smiles and tells me it’s okay and good and I SHOULD have done that, actually!

It’s making me tired and exhausted. I didn’t want to have to suddenly feel and deliberate over all of this, all at once, right now- But I feel I’d regret it even more if I DIDN’T do that, and then it ended, and the time and moment, the opportunity, it passed! It’s a frantic dread and paranoia that means I can’t appreciate and enjoy properly, because every little thing I so desperately claw at and prize and treasure, but also I keep telling myself not to get my hopes up, and…

It lowkey makes me want to curl up and cry? And sob, because now that insecurity, that voice in the back of my head, it was RIGHT, I really should’ve listened to it to begin with, and not ever bothered! Don’t risk the trust in connecting with someone else’s story that’s still in process, only ever engage with stuff fully finished.

I can never enjoy that anticipation and hope now, of being along the ride for the journey, of just getting to look out the window and wonder; Not knowing the ending, but looking forward to it! And I can’t do that anymore, not when I’m afraid of the trip suddenly grinding to a screeching halt out of nowhere!

But yeah, I’m just… I…

…I’m sad. I’m angry, and now I’m sad. Depressed, outright, directly because of this, when otherwise I wouldn’t have been- And that’s painful and frustrating and makes me feel like I’m being tossed around a whirlwind, with no hope. No say or agency, just a constant bad hand I have to brace myself for. So all I can do is curl up and lie down and hope for the worst to be over, and never dare to be so ungrateful or greedy to ask or hope for more, for good things, just for the bad things to lessen or stop.

In the end, it didn’t even matter, so I should just throw it all away, never try again; And everything I did beforehand, up until then, I’ll look back at it all, those fond and innocent memories, and I’ll look back with an eternal bitterness that will forever corrupt and scar those recollections. So even the past, which allegedly can never change, is ruined for me! The past never gets better, it only gets worse, so WHY… Why believe and hope, and love and live???

I’m just a stupid fool for being so invested in this cartoon, in fiction, why don’t I just GROW UP and focus on REAL things that matter, huh?!? I really do feel like Luz genuinely thinking and resigning herself to the Reality Check camp, having that childlike passion and joy just whittled down and strangled, feeling it die out; Knowing it will, so just getting it over with and killing it now, before I have to mourn later.

I shouldn’t ever put forth the trust in engaging with others’ stories, just my own because I at least have control there, I should just be alone and by myself with only my stories, and never get to connect with or experience companionship with others’ stories, ever again. Just build up my walls and hide and be alone and isolated as I’ve always been- It seems even with fiction or media, I’m STILL by myself! There’s an intimacy in reading and emotionally engaging with others’ stories, where other writers put a piece of themselves into that… Hoping others will read and respond and reciprocate, and feel the same!

Well, maybe I shouldn’t put myself out there, either, in fears of being punished and cut off and whittled down like that! Why express myself, why be, why live? Why be invested into the soul of others, manifested in their own content, if it’ll never come to fruition, if my own soul will only hurt for connecting?! This is worse than a fave or a comfort character dying, because at least the integrity of the story itself remains and is worth it.

There’s always the chance of a return or a revival or a flashback to appreciate, but THIS… This is real life. And it’s THE ending in the most abrupt and literal and tangible sense, of the media itself; An ending more powerful and harsh than any resolution to an arc. Because now NOTHING will ever be expected to come out from this, ever again- No new content, nothing else to enjoy. Media is like a fantasy, an escapism from real life, but even when I fully expected and accepted and saw the boundary and end between fantasy and reality… I still get punished with reality regardless! I can’t escape that real life because it WILL go out of its way to directly cut in and interfere, and ruin, what I love.

So why escape? Why invested? Why love? Why should I ever feel comfort??? It’s all stupid. I’m stupid. Life is finite and it’s merely what’s directly in front of you, don’t dare to dream or imagine, or think or hope, just focus on what’s in front and get by and try to live… Or at least ‘survive’. Or ‘not die’, I guess.

And now I resent real life even more for ruining this for me, when beforehand I could still like and appreciate it, even if I still needed some time away every now and then. So paradoxically, trying to get me to focus on real life, has made me detest it moreso! It’s that whole thing of don’t bother trying because you’ll just get punished for it, just passively wait and receive, don’t LIVE. Don’t stake initiative or agency.

At least if a character dies, the universe and immersion is still intact, if not moreso because then you feel and become even MORE connected and get that emotional catharsis, everything up until then and after takes on a whole new meaning and appreciation; But if it ends in real life, the immersion is gone. The fantasy is permanently shattered, and now it’s all worthless in hindsight because you’re reminded that it was never real to begin with.

And what little you DID get, is now ruined; And you’re not going to get anything else new, either! You can’t even KEEP things anymore… You’re just a bitter fool who’s going to get old and wither, look back, and become even MORE bitter and miserable. All of the emotion you felt, it’s been rendered worthless and meaningless, that connection once made… And I hate to see things ruined like that, so maybe don’t have things to begin with!

I’m bitterly, enviously jealous of others who still manage to enjoy, because why are you still invested?! Why still keep trying, don’t you realize how pointless it is!? And now I’m just ruining that for them, I’m ruining THEM, in my own mind and heart and place in life. How can you still keep going!? So even that stuff they make, that fandom content that exists on its own more or less in a sense, even THAT is marred and ruined for me… And I feel like I’m internally ruining that for others, that makes me feel guilty as I loathe myself for being so awful, so why believe that I can be better? Why try to be better then?!

I’m envious, because you guys still manage to cope and handle this in a realistic way, in a safe and mature manner. And anything others make, it’s just a cruel, cold reminder, a mockery even, of what I’ve lost, of my dashed and ruined hopes. And then I can’t bear to look at or even enjoy THAT, especially stuff made post-announcement, because you guys managed to keep making it anyway. And me, I didn’t, so what does that say about miserable old me? But then don’t make this about MYSELF…

Seriously though, if you’re going to still enjoy and create, please do so! Don’t let this bitter fool stop you. Don’t let me hurt you. Just keep going out there and be yourself, me, I’ll… I’ll figure something out I guess? But yeah, that’s MY problem, not yours, those of you who keep creating anyway, you’re everything I admire and more! You’re all heroes in a sense, and I encourage and fully support you- If my ramblings make you hesitate or discourage you, then just throw them aside and disregard that! I’d never want to intrude or interrupt someone’s own expression, not when I mourn my own, that’s for sure!

And y’know what? Other people who keep creating… You remind me that there IS hope. That there maybe is a point in going on and being invested, especially indie creators, because y’all have control and agency and take over what you make, and don’t have to depend or rely on, or fear, some gross corporation butting in and pulling the strings, threatening to revoke and take it all away! Thank you, I’m grateful, truly I am, I’m eternally indebted in a way I can never fully repay. Maybe I can try to make up for this by continuing to make my own things… So now this depressed, cynical rant, suddenly it takes a more hopeful turn as I write it, because of others!

And now I’m thinking to myself… It IS worth it to connect. For those little moments of inspiration and joy and hope that others can instill. Thanks, you guys. Out of nowhere, you suddenly made it better for me, and kind of helped me overcome this depressive slump; And here I was, just thinking and resigning myself to the end! I guess it never really IS the end… And what I said about feeling like Luz, throwing away her beloved book and joy of her life? Well, she DID go back to grab that book, and in doing so, found love, found family, and happiness she couldn’t have anticipated beyond her wildest dreams!

…Even so, wishful thinking aside, this has all been a whirlwind to me;

I’m tired.

#the owl house #the owl house season 2 #toh #dana terrace #disney #disneytva #rant #vent #rant tw #vent tw #ramblings

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irisbleufic · 3 years ago

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I can't believe a fanfic I read ages ago from the little G r e a t G a t s b y fandom on AO3 is being published is absolutely wild. I saw that that book going going to be published, and I read "The Pursued and the Pursuing" and I knew I recognized it from way back when I read it and! It really is you! I don't know you at all, but I have to say I'm really proud and I really admire all the work you've put into this and where you've gotten. This so legitimately cool.

I agree that it’s wild, if only because it never even occurred to me back in 2013, when I wrote the novella version, that actual publication would one day be possible! I just sort of assumed that The Great Gatsby would somehow never go out of copyright, that its eternal popularity would keep it perpetually under the ownership of some person or corporate entity with rights to it. I have to credit a friend with giving me a nudge in the autumn of last year regarding copyright being up on 1/1/21. They had caught wind of Michael Farris Smith’s prequel novel, Nick, coming out early this year. They were like, hey, if some famous, well established novelist can write a likely dull take on Nick’s early life, why can’t you seek publication for The Pursued and the Pursuing in some form given its extraordinary success as a novella with online readers?

I really had no good reason not to try at that point, and realized I’d need to hustle if I wanted to get it out there. I was afraid I’d wasted too much time, and that other writers would already have cornered the market with Gatsby transformations. I was also afraid that it would take being a novelist as big as, say, MFS to even get a publisher to take a chance on such a thing (public domain notwithstanding ). What I didn’t count on, I guess, was that most queer readings immediately forthcoming would focus on secondary characters (Nghi Vo’s The Chosen and the Beautiful, for example, which is about Jordan Baker). The folks at DartFrog in their trad pub department were quick to decide that what I’d done with Nick and Gatsby (and my original characters in the book) was worth taking a chance on. I’m grateful they recognized the need to act relatively swiftly, too, so as not to miss the momentum of this year as TGG’s first one in the public domain.

Thanks for stopping by to say hello and let me know you loved the earlier version when you read it! I hope you’ll enjoy the expanded print version just as much 💙

#the pursued and the pursuing #the great gatsby #great gatsby #natsby #nick carraway #jay gatsby

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shinygoku · 3 years ago

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very intrigued to see what you think of Henry!!! ^v^ (character ask!)

Another day, another Big Green! (The others are Piccolo and Thunderbird 2 lmao)

First impression

"Green ver of that one big creepy dude" (Look, when I was Babby I saw a Gordon picture somewhere that minorly spooked me lmao)

Impression now

Ahh, Henry! In some ways, very much like Duck! Green, long nose, popular with the fans and I'm here like Yeah he's a good fixture of the series lol

Ok well, maybe I should disclaim that he's not one of my favourites, which is partly as I guess it's a bit hard to nail down his personality.

His, for lack of a better term, Illness Arc is fascinating and oddly Real for a series about machinery. Something's genuinely amiss with him, but the lack of a clear cause (at least, to the other engines, who presumably don't know he was built from stolen, incomplete plans and the logical issues that would arise from that) and his frequent complaints turn the other characters off wanting to hear about it, thinking he's exaggerating. Then the Welsh Coal stopgap is found! Then the very next story he has a horrible crash but it was a blessing in disguise because then he's rebuilt as a Black 5 and his health issues are gone forever! (ain't we envious of machines now?) Until Lazy Writer Disease sets in Meta-wise, but more on that later.

I think it's safe to say that it's Entry Level RWS Knowledge to know Awdry's frustrations with the character, and it is kind of hilarious how much he tried to write him out, and iirc Henry wound up with the most appearances and 'his' book has 5 stories instead of the uniform 4 for some reason. But it seems it takes further Lazy Corporate Mandates to actually write him out in BwBa which really sucks and is doing such an iconic lad horribly dirty.

Pictured: Henry as seen by Awdry/Mattel, who are about to just shove him out of the story with varying degrees of success.

Well yeah, for me I can't really settle on an opinion because he never seems to have anything solid after the Rebuild. He's kind of the nicer one out of the Terrible Trio, but sometimes he's as bitchy and obnoxious as Gordon without prompting. He seems to be pretty unlucky and sometimes his misfortunes are self inflicted, but they don't commit to this bit. He gets his (in)famous forest, much to Awdry's chagrin, but it does offer a nice gentler side to him. He also seems to be the main Fast Freight engine, particularly more Fish shipments, but this doesn't really inform his character. He all too often feels like a Spare, Green Gordon who's less full of himself (but still gets boughts of Envy and inflated self importance, like Tenders for Henry), and that's a shame because this nebulous lack of anything concrete seems to be why Bad TatMR Writing diagnosed him with Need Welsh Coal again for quite a long time (dunno if that only changed when Mattel/Brenner came in or not). But then the US dub makes him sound like w--dy all-n and that's the worst treatment of all! I kind of understand the temptation to make him the resident worrier but HUUURGHGHH NOT LIKE THAT

So yeah, the better characterization of him needs to strike a good balance of him being ...I guess a Gentle Giant, who enjoys nature and maybe is a smidge prone to bouts of feeling jealous. Maybe catches the engine version of colds more than the others because the early morning runs in the freezing air? I dunno, I'm trying to combine several traits that have been in Henry but never seemed to stick. But done properly, I could really get behind a nice, faceted character like that~

Favourite moment

It feels a bit mean to say, but it's due to the strength of the episode itself with the fantastic visuals, godly music and shocking drama (with a nice bonus of Correct Head Codes!) that put Flying Kipper at the top of this list!

Another part of this ep, is the beginning where the Driver is saying "Don't tell Gordon, but if you pull this nicely, the Fat Controller may let you pull the Express!". Like, that really squeezes my heart, because his driver is rooting for him, the prospect of a better regarded job is floating there, and knowing what eventually happens, it's like... oof! But in a good way.

...Also I think that must have been something Awdry added after deciding not to kill him off because having that bit and for it to all go up in flames would have made children and me extremely upset and he would have been buried under letters of complaint from angry mothers of the time.

Idea for a story

Other than the overly simple and grimdark "he was in fact killed that day" type coma inducers, I suppose the Two Henries theory being explored could offer some interesting interactions.

Like, what if the Henry who rolls back into The Big Station is instantly accepted and in fact, liked more than og Henry? What if the other engines instead couldn't fully relax around him? Were his memories perfect? Too Perfect?

And what would happen if OG Henry were later discovered... (and in what condition?) Dun Dun Dun dododo Dun!

The thing is, it is hard to really explore this because it's innately such a dark, heavy concept. I don't enjoy the 'Authoritarian Hellscape" lameass interpretation by normies. I like my silly workcom on the rails with warm fuzzies and funny antics, thank you very much!

Unpopular opinion

Some of his faces (even before the worsening first inflicted by Magic Railroad) are pretty weird looking! Maybe cause his forehead is so huge and smooth, but maybe just the odd mouth shapes. I like the variety, but they aren’t what I’d call cute... I find myself thinking ‘Moon Face’ looking at him [even with the lack of craters lmao] and oops I think I missed the weirdest grin of all, but here’s a small sample anyway

Favourite relationship

Not a favourite, per say, but some of the more friction-ish interactions he has with Thomas or Percy are pretty funny. With Thomas’ immortal flippant disregard to viaduct safety, Percy retorting that engines with Proper Funnels do, in fact, need scarves, something Henry wouldn’t know about, and that Henry somehow manages to dismiss Bill and Ben, a feat Gordon needs to take notes from. Even the Something in the Air exchange with Thomas, which isn’t really stellar writing just has a funny lame argument vibe.

For some nice Wholesome interaction, Bear is hands down the winner! Easy pick maybe, and it makes me wonder if Bear’s complete absence in the TVS is part of the downward spiral because he’d offer a lot more Plotlines.... hmmm...!

Favourite headcanon

Other than the universal fandom acceptance that He Digs Nature, Baby is the notion I’ve seen a few times that his “fear” of the rain, or what it would do to his paint, isn’t actually why he stopped in the tunnel, and it had more to do with his mechanical failure and/or him having something of a nervous breakdown. He does come across as something of an ass if you take the episode at face value, but there having a secret deeper meaning is way more interesting 👀

#this is TTTE #TTTE Henry #TTTE #Thomas the Tank Engine #Henry the Green Engine #ttte talk #I also mentioned Gordon several times but I won't properly tag him lol

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dangerouscommiesubversive · 3 years ago

Text

all my tubes and wires and careful notes

Fandom: Kamen Rider Ghost

Characters: Tsukimura Akari, Alia

Song: "She Blinded Me With Science," Thomas Dolby (playlist here)

Note: Thank you to @si-siw for letting me borrow your headcanon and infecting me with this ship! I hope you enjoy the story!

The skies of the Ganma World may be clear, but the ground remains in a state, and so Akari and Igor have been working non-stop for nearly five hours when they hear a quiet, polite cough and look up to see Alia standing in the laboratory doorway. When she has their attention, she says, softly, “Are you on the verge of any particular scientific breakthroughs?”

Igor seems poised to launch into an extended explanation of what they’ve been working on, but Akari cuts him off with, “Not really. Decent progress, but nothing big yet.”

“I see. Thank you.” Then, directly to Igor, “In that case, I will need to borrow Miss Akari for a short period. You should use this time to have a meal, you’ve been working for some time.”

Blinking, Akari makes sure all of her notes are in order and then follows Alia out of the room and down the hall. “What did you need me for?”

She can see the curl of Alia’s tiny smile just from the way it changes her profile, before her mouth has even really moved. “I wanted company for lunch. And,” slightly more quietly, “I thought you might like some time out of Igor’s company.”

“I—yeah, I really do, thank you. He’s not a bad research partner, he’s just…” Akari gestures vaguely as she hunts for the right words and then settles on the diplomatic, “high energy. Plus at some point I’m going to have to explain the whole ‘I’m a lesbian’ thing and I’m not looking forward to it.”

“Is he very persistent?”

“No, you know, he really isn’t, but it’s still a conversation that we’ll need to have.” They turn a corner, go through a doorway, and are unexpectedly in a small sitting room, mostly plainly decorated, although one wall holds a painting that Akari blinks at. “Wait, did Cubi paint that?”

The tiny curl of a smile comes back. “He did. It makes the room brighter. Please, sit.”

Lunch is already served, the small table set with tea and sandwiches, and when Akari sees them her stomach growls, and she blushes. “Excuse me, I guess I am hungry.”

“Then sit down, please, and eat.”

Something seems odd as they sit down to eat, but Akari’s so hungry that she doesn’t bother working out what it is at first, in favor of wolfing down sandwiches as she gives Alia a progress report on the soil research. It’s nothing to do with the food, at least. Not the tea either, although the blend is unfamiliar. Certainly it isn’t Alia’s manner, she’s listening and asking thoughtful questions as always.

It’s—

“I love your manicure,” she’s saying, “sometimes I wish I could do fun stuff with my nails, but I do so much with my—I’m sorry.” She lowers her cup, blinking. “I just realized I don’t think I’ve ever seen your hands before.”

Alia looks down at her own hands, wrapped primly around her teacup. “No, I suppose you wouldn’t have.”

“I, if this is rude to ask then stop me, but do you hide them on ohh.” Akari trails off mid-sentence as a pattern of vividly pink circuitry pulses from Alia’s wrists to her manicured fingertips. “Oh, that’s beautiful.”

There’s a moment of silence as Alia stares at her in faint but obvious surprise. “Do you think so?” She lifts one hand from her cup and turns it in the air, as if she’s seeing it for the first time herself. “They’re prosthetic. My real hands were badly injured in one of the early trials of Eyecon technology. These are lifelike, but as you can see, they aren’t a perfect counterfeit.” The circuit pattern pulses down them again as she holds her hand out to Akari, a stylized eye appearing for a moment in the center of her palm. “My father preferred to address the issue as he addressed many others in his later life, by ignoring it, and so I became accustomed to keeping my hands concealed. In my Eyecon form they were whole, of course, but old habits are hard to break.”

Akari stares at Alia’s extended hand in shock and fascination. “I…wow, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up a painful subject.”

“It’s all right. It was more than a hundred years ago at this point.”

“Oh, yeah, I suppose it…wait, if your hands are prosthetic then how did you manage the manicure? Are they acrylic?”

“They’re magnetic.” Suddenly smiling, Alia sets down her teacup and removes one of her pointed, painted thumbnails, revealing dull metal beneath, and then puts it back on. “Alain had several sets made for me as a gift shortly after we all returned to inhabiting our original flesh.”

“That was thoughtful of him.”

“He’s always been a thoughtful boy.”

Akari takes a sip of tea, amused by the reminder that of course Alain’s sister still thinks of him as a boy, and the meal continues in companionable silence for a few minutes until she realizes something else. “You were involved in the original Eyecon trials?”

Another one of those tiny curls of smile. “Of course. I was Edith’s research assistant for many years.”

“You were? Why didn’t he ever—of course he never mentioned, why would he give someone else credit. What parts of the project did you work on?”

“Oh, most of them, I’m primarily an engineer but I’ve dabbled in a number of scientific disciplines. And I do some design as well. Would you like to see my workshop?”

“I would love to.”

---

The first thing Akari sees are the notebooks. The heavy bookcase in Alia’s lab does hold some academic texts, but more than half of it is packed with enormous ledgers bound in dark leather, so many that she’s shocked the shelves don’t groan under their weight. Two more lie open on an enormous rolltop desk, their unlined pages filled with with notes and sketches in a tiny, precise hand. On the walls hang several large, heavy parchment sheets, on which are hand-drawn diagrams of machinery, hibernation capsules, an exploded Eyecon, and—

“Is that…Alain’s suit?”

“Yes.” Alia reaches up and trails a fond hand down the edge of the diagram, which is labeled Necrom—for Adel? Alain. “I designed it.”

“Oh.”

“And here is Makoto’s.” The next diagram, Makoto’s name written at the top in ink much less faded than the rest. “And the next one is an early draft of what eventually became Takeru’s, although Edith did some further work with it that he didn’t inform me about. He designed and built the transformation devices, but the suits are my work.”

“Oh, I…” Akari stares up at the diagrammed suits, the close-up sketches of tiny components, more of Alia’s perfect handwriting in notes that she can only partially read. Some are in Japanese, but others are in Latin, and more are in a language that she doesn’t recognize. There are more diagrams, too, rolled up in a wooden bin, each one neatly labeled. Specter 1.0, Necrom (Alternates), Wraith, Manes and Lemures, Eyecon (Prototype), Hands. And the tables—once she can tear her eyes away from the wall she sees that there’s a blank Eyecon disassembled on one table, and on another is an Ulorder with a panel open lying on top of yet another diagram, this one in different handwriting and weighed down at the corners with books. “This is the most beautiful room I’ve ever been in.”

“I am very glad that you think so.”

“I, I just.” A bit of futile gesturing as Akari struggles for words, and then, “Look, can I. Can I buy you dinner?”

Alia…blinks. “Pardon me?”

“I would, um, love to take you to dinner sometime, so we can. Talk. More. Because I really like talking to you. And, and maybe a concert or a movie or something, or there’s a History of Engineering exhibit at a museum near the temple, I know you haven’t gotten to visit the human world much and I could…show you around.”

There’s a long moment where Alia’s just staring at her and Akari considers the very serious possibility that she just messed up big time.

“I,” she starts again, “that is, if you want—”

“I would enjoy that.” Alia takes one of Akari’s hands in both of hers. Akari can feel how cool they are, the odd smoothness of the skin as pink circuits pulse down them, and normally she’d want to know more about that but right now there’s so much other stuff happening even if really it’s only one other thing. “A concert, if you know of one coming up, I think I get enough of engineering in the normal course of my day that maybe the museum might be better saved for a second visit.”

Akari’s ears are ringing. “There’s, um, a performance from a popular violinist coming up next Thursday night? Takeru gave me two tickets, he knows the performer…somehow…”

The curl of smile, small and warm and directly entirely at her. “I enjoy violin music. And we can discuss our work over dinner.”

If she nods any harder she’s going to get dizzy. “That. That sounds wonderful. I’ll, uh, I’ll pick you up at five!”

#tsukimura akari #ganma alia #fanfiction #30 day shuffle challenge

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secret-engima · 4 years ago

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This. Has been a perfectly terrible day. Can I beg you for a ficbit or a snippet from one of your works, like Team Gremlin or Noctscar or something ? I just - they’re beautiful, and I just really, really need something beautiful right now.

SURE. I don’t have much in the way of snippets, but lemme see what I can find. I might have to throw in something from BNHA cause that’s the fandom the muses are chewing on this exact second.

...

Team Gremlin:

It had been … a very bad few weeks for Qrow all told. And that was saying something. Everything had seemed fine one day, business as usual. Tai was back from his requisite number of missions to keep his license and teaching at Signal again —which he genuinely seemed to enjoy for some reason—, his nieces were as adorable as ever, and Summer was sometimes talking his ear off about maybe taking a teaching position somewhere herself after running a few missions to keep her own license active —she’d been busier lately with the girls than running around kicking butt, but it wasn’t like Qrow blamed her for that—.

Then Leo was found dead in his office. Knifed in the neck, one round discharged from his weapon in the direction of the guest couch, blood pooling all over the chair and low table where the investigators said he’d been dragged from and laid on the floor in some kind of pose. No one unusual had been seen going in or out, there had been nothing on the office cameras —covered by a Semblance of some kind, it was decided, because of the fading, glass-like Aura shards on the floor—. The only warning had been the sound of Leo’s single shot before he died. Qrow had arrived as soon as he could to help investigate, since the primary suspect would … not be one the police even knew to look for. He had helped Dyna —poor woman had been wire tense with rage rather than her usual calm self, and it was no wonder—, search for clues the police would miss, then searched the secret tunnels for good measure.

They had found a Grimm inside one of the deeper antechambers, far too deep to have gotten there by accident, a strange, jellyfish like beast that had been surprisingly hard to kill for something that small. They’d never seen it’s like before, and the thought of it being under the school, where kids were, where Oz and his inner circle were supposed to hold sway-. He’d never seen the otter Faunus more furious as they stood amid the fading Dark dust, her lips twisted, brow wrinkled in a way that had made the black line and red dots of her old bandit tattoos look more pronounced.

They’d found no other signs that Salem knew how to get into the school tunnels, but they rechecked them all and trapped several of the ones leading outward as temporary security measures. With Dyna in place as the new —temporary on paper but soon to be permanent— Headmaster, Qrow had gathered up what evidence they could pry loose from their police contacts and gone back to Oz so they could try to sort this out.

Of course, Qrow’s first impulse was to blame Salem, but Oz had listened to the report of a jellyfish Grimm under the school and his expression had folded into something pained. Knowing. He must have known what kind of Grimm it was, but hadn’t elaborated yet, just told Dyna to investigate all of Leo’s documents, Scroll calls, and communications over the past year, and insisted he would not explain until there was either evidence or not for his theory, for fear of making them biased.

So, with Salem seemingly not the automatic culprit, they had started hunting for info. Summer had offered to come back and help, but Oz had told her to stay on her chosen mission instead.

The pen had been an unexpected complication.

...

Always I Dreamed verse

Summer ducked past her into the shower as Raven left it, pausing to stare at Raven’s tattoos for only a moment before chirping a quiet good morning and asking if she was okay after yesterday. Raven just grunted, because she was combat functional and frankly that was all that mattered. She had already pulled on her clothes from yesterday —all their possessions were in her inventory and she didn’t want questions on where it came from, she’d have to stuff it all in a duffel bag and hide it in the den to explain that away later— by the time Taiyang got up and Raven remembered the uniforms. Raven nudged open the bag while Qrow ducked out of their den and peered over her shoulder, “Everybody has to wear that stuff?” Qrow sneered as Raven pulled out the first button down shirt, “Hardly looks sturdy.”

“It’s just for the school grounds I think, we have our combat gear for training missions and stuff anyway.” Taiyang said as he pulled out a shirt of his own from a different bag. Raven took a moment to glance at his bare torso. He slept in pants but not a shirt apparently, which was stupid, but better than being entirely naked at night. He had a decent build, which she knew from watching him fight yesterday, and a truly appalling lack of scars. Her life had been saved by somebody who had probably never had a truly decent fight in his life before that day. Wonderful.

He also had tattoos, and Raven squinted at them for a moment because despite the differing size and placement, they all looked very much like the ones Raven and Qrow had gotten during a rare moment of total drunkenness at fifteen. He was missing the large asian dragon outline that wound up Raven’s own torso, but he had the blue crow perched as if about to take flight that Raven had, the running blue wolf who’s lower half dissolved into petals, and she thought she glimpsed a blue clockwork rabbit under his right arm. When he turned around briefly to put his back to them, she saw that most of his back had been taken up with the stylized outline of a raven in flight.

She shook her head and looked away. Whatever. Summer possessed a tattoo on her arm similar to the asian dragon winding up Qrow’s arm from elbow to shoulder. Some tattoos were just popular, and blue ink was easier to come by for fill-in tattoos than the black used for outlines.

Qrow must have remembered Taiyang’s words last night about Raven’s uniform being at the top, because he was already rooting down to the outfit right beneath hers —there was more fabric in the bag than that, but Raven wasn’t going to worry about why just yet—. He yanked out a shirt and jacket that looked his size, then blinked when something short and plaid tumbled out with it. Snatching it up, he unfolded it and made a face, “Is this a skirt? With my uniform?”

Summer poked her head out of the bathroom, a wash of steam following her —oh right, hot water showers were a thing, darn— while Taiyang looked from Qrow to the skirt and back. Qrow was busy staring at the skirt, so he missed the expression of pure glee that flickered over the other teen’s face before he casually said, “What, that? It’s a kilt, man. Old Vale tradition.” Raven blinked very slowly, because that was a surprisingly good lie even though she knew it was nonsense —her memory on early canon was fuzzy, but she would have remembered the male characters running around in skirts—. She debated calling him on it for a moment, but she was from outside the kingdoms like Qrow, so technically she had no way to know that Taiyang was lying.

Besides, if Taiyang wanted to poke the bear that was her brother’s temper, better he do it now and get it over with than later when they were training.

Qrow was still making annoyed noises under his breath as he examined the “kilt”, and a glance at Summer slipping out of the shower in a towel showed she was fighting down laughter. Silver eyes met Raven’s with hopeful amusement and Raven looked away. She was still angry that the Story had forced itself into place in her life. With a shake of her head, Raven finished yanking out her uniform —one of? There was so much fabric in there, did the school really waste money making multiple outfits for each student?— and started pulling off her old clothes to put it on. Taiyang made a noise like someone had knifed him just as she dropped her shirt to the floor and she looked up in alarm. Taiyang had whipped around to put his back to her, and she could see the flush of color crawling up his neck and the backs of his ears. He didn’t look hurt or anything, but when Summer wandered in and dropped her towel onto her bed to put on her uniform —huh, she had the same tattoos as Raven, Qrow, and Taiyang, just with the perched crow as a large outline that went down to her mid back and a large blue raven in flight over her abdomen that looked like the smaller one on Qrow’s back—, Taiyang made the dying noise again, snatched up his bag of clothes, and rushed for the bathroom.

Raven had the feeling she should understand what that was about, but she didn’t get it, and when she risked a glance at Summer, the other girl actually looked just as baffled. So maybe it wasn’t some social thing she’d forgotten. Maybe it was just a thing with him specifically.

...

Feather-Light and Fire-Bright verse (BNHA)

Which was why, the next time she spotted a little red feather slinking over to place a trio of shiny buttons on the park bench she liked best, she hastily caught it with one hand. It was very soft, wiggling slightly in her grip, twitching and fluttering almost like a frightened living thing, so much so she shushed it gently on instinct, “It’s okay, I won’t damage you.” Taking out the note she’d spent days agonizing over, she skewered it to the quill of the feather, “I need you to take a message to whoever controls you.” She let it go and the feather wiggled erratically in the air, like a cat trying to wiggle free of an unfamiliar collar before flitting away. Fuyumi resisted the urge to chase it and see where it led. She’d sent her note, now she would wait for a reaction.

She absently took the three coat buttons and put them in her pocket before going home. It would be stupid to leave them as litter in the park, but it also felt like a bad idea to throw them away and possibly anger whoever was watching her. Besides, she had a collection going now, she almost had enough matching buttons to make a full set for a long coat.

A week went by with no sign of her shadow before she finally spotted a red feather again. It lurked on the edges of the park, flitting out into view as she walked by before slipping off in the direction of a more sequestered part of the park. Fuyumi hesitated, saw the feather come back and swirl around her a few times like an excited puppy before rushing off again and decided she was either about to meet someone shy or about to be kidnapped and potentially murdered. Slipping her hand into her handbag to grip the small pro-grade taser inside just in case, Fuyumi followed the feather into the copse of trees that shielded that part of the park from the street and the rest of the grassy area.

The feather slipped away to rejoin … a lot of other feathers, and Fuyumi paused on the edges of the little forested nook to get a good look at her mysterious shadow for the first time. Golden eyes, piercing and almost predatory in intensity, flitted up to meet her gaze as he stood up. He was about her age she would guess, maybe a year older, so lean that if she hadn’t been able to see the muscles of his bare arms she would have called him scrawny. He was wearing a sleeveless hoodie that looked like it had lost a few too many rounds with a washing machine, clean but all faded and stretched and worn looking. His hair was all tousled and pale gold, and the red feathers were clustered on his back in huge wings that looked like they belonged on someone about twice his size and weight. He smiled a little, a practiced thing that was too nervous to be real, but if Fuyumi hadn’t lived her entire life around Pro Heroes and the children of other such elites, she would never had known.

He held up her note between too fingers, not commenting on the wary distance still between them nor making any moves to close it, “Um, I’m not a stalker, just wanna get that out of the way. Sorry if I … came off that way? I’m, uh, not good at introducing myself and I didn’t … really know what else to do.”

#SE asks #hamelin-born asks #snippets #snippet #Secret Engima Rambles #Melodies and Manuscripts #Team Gremlin verse #Always I Dreamed verse #Feather Light and Ember Bright verse

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lofi-tophat · 4 years ago

Text

Let’s talk about the 70s punk scene and HWS England

I sometimes feel that the fandom doesn’t give England’s love for punk/rock music much justice. Some authors usually write about this human AU in which Arthur wants to be a rockstar and some others plainly avoid the topic whatsoever. Which is a pity because I actually believe the whole character has a deep punk reference, specially regarding appearence (might expand on this in another post but basically, for me, England seems like some random bushy browed anime 70s punk guy who suddenly has to put on a suit and attend world meetings, which is both fascinating and hilarious).

So I thought maybe we could dive a bit into very general punk history and then I’d like to share with you some hc regarding England’s involvement with punk culture in general (if you just want to read the hcs just scroll down to the last paragraph with the bullet ponts).

My experience in punk stuff is actually that I’m kind of a metalhead lol. Metalheads and punks had and probably still have a deeply-rooted rivalry. However, punk influenced metal a lot, and metal also influenced punk. So I stumbled upon many punk facts while browsing about my favorite metal bands.

Take this as historical hetalia... but counterculture historical hetalia :D (which is something we need more in the fandom, btw, I know military history is cool but its also cool how humans expressed themselves through art, fashion and music when they felt the pressure of authority and the frustration of society).

Historical context

Let’s return a bit in time and remember the 60s. The 60s were this blessed time in which people tried to defeat the establishment with peace and love. The hippie movement is from this decade and it influenced a lot on how people thought and behaved. In terms of counterculture, I must say this is a fascinating time in history (I recently discovered psychodelic science and its so incredible what was being talked back then).

Anyways, although a lot of young people were into this discourse of love and peace, some weren’t really that happy about it. In Europe, the post-war situation was sad and a lot of young people either were jobless or had the shittiest jobs you could imagine. Politics were also depressing. This was the origin not only for punk but also for other genres of heavy music, such as metal: People who didn’t want to be all happy and peaceful and had the need to express their frustration and anger, shouting about how society was fucked up. They needed an outlet.

Origins of punk

The origins of punk music are actually not quite clear. In fact, the US and the UK both claim that punk music was born in their country. Funnily enough, my country also claims to be the origin of punk (I’ll leave this mini-doc for you. Sadly, I don’t think this is a correct claim, mainly because their music was in spanish and I doubt that major punk bands took them as reference. Its a cool band tho).

I have to side with americans on this: The arguments for the american origins of punk are quite solid. The Ramones were the first actual punk band out there. They were active since 1974. Their music had all the elements of punk and, chronologically, they were the first ones performing this type of sound.

However, they didn’t have the aesthetic. That actually was a british invention. American punk had still leather jackets, jeans and sneakers. British punk? Well, remember all those ripped pants and shirts you commonly associate with punk? Yes, those were the Sex Pistols all along. They were the ones introducing the attitude and the style. The Pistols had some insane performances and a huge shock-value that can’t be found in early american punk. So you can safely say that your image of what a punk is is based mainly on the Pistols (also, for singing anti-authoritarian lyrics, they actually were managed by some dude who had a fashion shop. So yeah...).

Punk attitude or philosophy or whatever

The reason why I addressed the rockstar thing at the start of the post is because I find it curious. Punk is characterized by the whole Do It Yourself attitude and breaking with the establishment. Anarchism in punk is scandalizing people since there is no authority whatsoever. There wasn’t really any deep philosophy behind all of this, nor any political movement. Punk has nothing to do with a formal anarchist philosophy (which actually exists and has nothing to do with disorder). However, punk is characterized by the anti-establihsment lyrics. Remember, this is all about scandalizing people (which sometimes took great lengths). Presentations from british punk bands were also quite wild those days. They involved a lot of insults, spitting and, of course, pogo.

So, it is obvious that there is this deep concern about turning into a sellout, a pretty common fear in any underground scene. Authenticity was encouraged. Aspiring rockstars really didn’t have much mercy in the community so to speak, at least in this specific period.

I would also like to add how punk had other aspects beside the music. For example, fanzines were pretty popular in the punk scene in the 70s and a great way to engage with what was going on with bands and music. I remember also this interview of this band in which they remembered how a very high guy decided to recite his poem while the band was playing. So, yeah, literature, illustration, fashion and other stuff were involved in the punk scene too.

British punk was also characterized by a very nihilistic attitude and a total disregard for previous influences. 1977, a song by The Clash, stated:

No Elvis, Beatles, or the Rolling Stones!

Now, for the important stuff: The music. Punk music is all about being simple. Punk musicians aren’t really known for their virtuosity in their instruments, something that actually inspired musicians from a lot of heavy bands later. In fact, the famous Sid Vicious from the Sex Pistols never could learn how to play the bass. So the band disconnected his instrument from the amplifier and he only had to pretend to play. The guy actually tried to learn how to play bass but music wasn’t exactly his talent. He had tons of punk attitude though, and that was the reason why his band didn’t kick him out.

Vocals are usually shouted, the rythm is fast and the riffs are quite simple. In fact, there is this famous publication on a 1976 british fanzine that stated:

This is a chord

This is another

This is a third

Now form a band

HWS England and the 70s punk scene and onwards

Thanks to his immortality, it is obvious that England had to experience the 70s in all their glory (what a lucky bastard). Was he there? Hell yes. As I explained before in some of my hc posts, nations represent the population more than their Government, so I really believe that England felt the frustration from that post-wwii decade and he probably also felt pissed about this. Working for the Government must have felt really frustrating during those years.

In the past, he probably would have tried to take his ship and sail the seas or whatever, but that was not possible in the modern era. I guess that’s how he discovered punk.

Now, rock existed in England before punk. I mean, the Beatles, duh. So Arthur wouldn’t have been completely ignorant about rock music in general. Contrary to popular belief I don’t imagine him being that much of a beatlemaniac though. Sure he likes them, but the music didn’t resonated with him as much. But boy, that first time he heard the Pink Fairies in 1971 (Yes, this was an actual band, a proto-punk band)? Yeah, he could relate more to that.

More detailed stuff here:

Pubs were crucial for the development of punk music. They were these spaces in which bands could play, a venue to discover new music. Yes, Arthur must have been a regular in a lot of these pubs.

Fanzines probably fascinated Arthur as an outlet for his own writings and silly drawings. He probably created a cringey pseudonym and collaborated with a lot of them.

Its canon that England likes to critic american movies, and, taking from there, I think he’s the type of guy that has an opinion for everything. So I can imagine him also writing about what bands he enjoyed and what bands sucked.

Yeah, I can also see him being drunk and just reciting a poem while some rock band played behind.

With some ability, and a lil bit of tricks, Arthur could escape normal Government activities and perform with punk bands at nights. People were so into the music that he had no problem passing by.

Some cover art in CDs show Enlgland with a guitar and a bass (yes, not many people remember the bass cover art). So he probably plays both guitar and bass. He also probably plays the drums. Of course, he’s no virtuoso and he only knows the most basic stuff in those three instruments. I can see him being into songwriting tho.

Music equipment:

Guitar: Definetely a Telecaster

Bass: Fender P-bass and I can also see him having a Rickenbacker 4001

All these instruments are full with stickers. Punk instruments look really cool btw. (I wish my bass could look like those I see in certain punk bands)

England’s probably the kind of guy that doesn’t cut his strings at the head of his guitar.

He can actually play guitar/bass and sing at the same time.

England plays bass with a pick (what an asshole, we bassists know picks are not allowed)

Contrary to popular belief, I can see England appreciating good rock music from other countries and supporting them. He probably insists that punk music was born in the UK though.

1977: The Queen was going to celebrate her silver jubilee. And England had no problem with this. He really had none... but he HAD to be in that boat trip with the Sex Pistols. There’s no way he was going to miss that. He later had to explain his abscence that day to his Government officials (Btw, my hc for England’s relationship with his monarchy is “It’s complicated”. I can explain this later. Just remember that he was really pissed those days)

I can see Arthur in general being really involved with the scene. A lot of the stuff they were making actually matches with his canon interests and even personality. So he probably enjoyed those days and felt quite at home. I can even say that, for a long time, he hadn’t felt that kind of connection with his own people.

Although I can see England being attracted by the nihilism in the scene, I think his romanticism protects him from embracing it fully.

England had to live a double-life during this era. Not that it was new for him.

Arthur was pierced several times by some random, drunk teenagers. He doesn’t remember who tho. He was also drunk. Obviously his piercings close really fast, unless he has a permanent jewel in there.

I can actually see England expanding his music taste. Although punk is in his heart, it wouldn’t be strange for me that he’s overall a rock nerd and enjoys other genres, specially those with fast drum beats and heavy riffs. So I can see him having some metal favorites too, having a certain taste for prog rock and even digging into hardcore.

I’m still unsure if England would have been a massive Pistols fan as fanfics usually portray him. I mean, maybe? I would say he is definetely into acts such as the Pink Fairies (I mean, c’mon, its perfect). The Clash and the Damned probably also have a place in his heart.

After the punk scene dried out (the 80s weren’t that great for punk music although it was the birth of even heavier forms of music based on punk), England also was eager about the new genres flourishing during these times based on punk. Acts like folk punk might have had an appeal for him. He’s also fond of the punk-ish bands from the 90s like Green Day.

“Punk will never die!” shouted England while stage diving in some random small concert. He likes to support new bands these days.

The most fascinating thing, maybe in a more poetic sense, is that England’s immortality probably also helps him to keep up a punk spirit as much as his nationhood allows him, instead of aging poorly and angry like a lot of punk musicians... I mean, he aged poorly, but for other reasons lmao.

#hetalia #hws england #lofi-tophat: really long hc #in the next issue: America is a swiftie WITH EVIDENCE #I do enjoy some american metal bands but I don't see America being that much into heavy music #he probably doesn't even care if punk was born in the us or not so england maybe won that one #guys i could ramble forever with my music hcs but ill just leave you with Moldovas extensive pop collection #finland's passion for folk metal acts like korpiklaani #and cuba shouting AZZUUUUUCAAARRR in karaokes #btw pirate metal exists kind of as a subgenre but it exists and england is into it

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lilydalexf · 4 years ago

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Old School X is a project interviewing X-Files fanfic authors who were posting fic during the original run of the show. New interviews are posted every Tuesday.

Interview with Circe Invidiosa

Circe Invidiosa has 11 stories at Gossamer, but there are even more X-Files stories at her website. Some of my favs I’ve recced here before, like Make It Worse and Slap a Goatee On Me and Call Me Evil. She also made a bunch of X-Files collage art, including some cover art for fics (hers and others), which you probably saw if you were reading fic back when authors posted fics on their own websites where art could be shared. Big thanks to Circe Invidiosa for doing this interview.

Does it surprise you that people are still interested in reading your X-Files fanfics and others that were posted during the original run of the show (1993-2002)?

Well, it would surprise me if people did read my fic. As it happens, I don't hear much feedback from my fic these days. Probably because the bulk of it is on Gossamer and my own site rather than AO3. Also, I was never a BNA. I worked a lot behind the scenes – hosting other authors' sites and making fanart and dustjackets. I think that's what I'd be remembered for, if anything.

What do you think of when you think about your X-Files fandom experience?

I miss the collective excitement and discussions we had as groups. When you got in with a group in the XF fandom, you felt like you knew everybody there. Now the fandom feels a little faceless except for the people I still follow from my old groups.

Social media didn't really exist during the show's original run. How were you most involved with the X-Files online (atxc, message board, email mailing list, etc.)?

Most of my experience was on Yahoo Groups. I joined Scullyfic while it was still there and then E-muse when it became an e-mail list, which I'm still a part of. I was part of several Yahoo Groups (can't remember all of them now), where I'd post my fic, RealPlayer slideshows (remember those?!), and collages. I never really took part in discourse because I'm shy and don't think anyone cares about my opinions (still don't!). The e-mail address I used for those groups was purged a couple of years ago, so I've lost all those messages.

What did you take away from your experience with X-Files fic or with the fandom in general?

My take away is that fanfic made me a better writer, thanks to having some great betas, and it made me a better professional writer for it (my real-life work is writing but not fun writing) because I learned to take criticism.

I also used to make a lot of fanart, collages and dustjackets for fic mostly. My big take away from that was that I really got into graphics and I got super proficient at Photoshop, which helped my own artistic endeavours and photography. I didn't realize how much skill I had developed until I've had to help someone with their graphics or photo editing.

What was it that got you hooked on the X-Files as a show?

My mother was watching X-Files before I was and she was raving about it. I don't have a great relationship with my mom, but one thing she was usually right about was TV shows. It's where I got my love of Sci-Fi.

I think the first episode I watched was Ice, which definitely hooked me. As for when the shipping started, I remember we were watching Lazarus, and when Mulder was yelling at Lula (I had to look that up) about hurting the hostage Scully, my mom said, "Oh, he's so in love with her." And I was all, "What?! Pfff." But then I could not stop thinking about it. And then I thought about it way, way too much.

What got you involved with X-Files fanfic?

I was in my late 20s, and it was around the end of S7 and I kept thinking about what if these two dumb idiots actually talked one day. And I kept thinking about dialogue in my head about what they'd actually say. The internet was still in its infancy back then, but I'd seen fan sites here and there. So I decided to search around to see if other people were talking about it and thinking about it like I was. I was such a noob I'd never even heard of fanfic. Imagine my delight when I discovered it. I found a few stories and thought, 'Well, I can do that.' And I wrote up my first story, found a place to post it (wasn't Ephemeral the best?), got some kind feedback, found a really nice person (not sure she wants to be named since she used her real name in the fandom back in the day) who encouraged me a lot and directed me to all the e-mail lists and Yahoo Groups that I needed to be on, and then, Bob's your uncle, I wrote more and more.

What is your relationship like now to X-Files fandom?

Periphery. Most of my experience in any fandom is now on Tumblr because that's where my attention span is. Show me pretty pictures and funny stuff. I am old now and don't want to think hard.

Were you involved with any fandoms after the X-Files? If so, what was it like compared to X-Files?

Veronica Mars was my next fandom experience. A number of my XF friends got me hooked on VM. The VM fandom was a LOT younger compared to the XF fandom. When I joined the XF fandom, I was the kid compared to most of the other fans who were all goddesses and royalty in my eyes. But in the VM fandom, I was in my 30s and the rest of the fandom were all in their early 20s if not younger. It often showed, so I stayed out of discussions and just posted my fic once I started writing it. I took a new handle (invida) when I started writing VM fic. Just in case these kids felt like my writing sucked, I didn't want it getting back to the XF fandom that I’d branched out and failed spectacularly.

By then fandom experiences had moved over to LiveJournal. I never really got involved in the discourse or the fandom fights. I knew what people were saying and where the schisms were, but I was all about the fanfic and the pretty pictures. Most of my LJ friends just discussed the episodes and posted their fic and that was good with me.

What got me writing fic for VM was Anjou's brilliant VM fic Into the Blue. Seriously, if you love VM S1, read her fic. Just so beautiful.

VM was also where started writing a WIP, which was a wild trip. I wrote a much-loved WIP called Damn, Damn the Circumstance which people still ask me about finishing to this day. Someday…*wistful sighs*

Who are some of your favorite fictional characters? Why?

Scully. She was everything! Lapsed Catholic, degrees in science, skeptic, always trying to work within the rules but still not taking crap. Yeah, she was the best.

Veronica Mars was great until she wasn't. I have a lot of issues with her beyond S2. And don't even talk to me about S4. For me, S1 was the best, I enjoyed the movie, the books were okay, but nothing else happened after that. NOTHING.

And the first character I ever loved was Princess Leia. She was also everything to me growing up. I wanted to be her. I still do.

Do you ever still watch The X-Files or think about Mulder and Scully?

Now and then. Not as much as I used to. I sometimes have it on in the background when I'm doing other things. Back before the pandemic, my BFF and I would have get togethers where we would play Scrabble, eat a lot of candy, and binge several XF episodes. I miss doing that. Hopefully, we will get back to that soon.

Do you ever still read X-Files fic? Fic in another fandom?

I am not an active XF fanfic reader right now. I will read any stories my friends put out. Otherwise, I only occasionally read some I come across on Tumblr in my feed, but I am not seeking them out. I will beta for any XF author who asks me as well.

I am reading fic in other fandoms though – Endeavour, Broadchurch, Sherlock…huh, I'm just realizing that's a lot of British stuff. I have been really into British detective series for the last few years.

Do you have any favorite X-Files fanfic stories or authors?

I used to run an XF fic recommendation site called How Will It End usually with at least one other person (I went through at least 4 partners on that project because I'm a control freak). We'd compile our recs and then I'd post them on my site. We'd also feature authors we really liked and interview them. Not unlike these interviews!

I'm terrible at giving feedback/comments. So I solved that problem by making a rec site. That way I could tell authors I loved their fics by recommending them. I didn't have to comment, I'd just say, 'I'd like to rec your fic'. And then they'd get promotion. Win-win. Back in those days, the fandom would absolutely roast you for promoting your own fic, so to get on a rec site was a big deal. Not that I had a popular rec site or anything. But I think authors really enjoyed being asked.

All that to say I've liked a lot of fics. I can pull up the archives of HWIE and show you all the faves I liked. :)

What is your favorite of your own fics, X-Files and/or otherwise?

Back in the day, E-muse would hold Improv Challenges, where other members would give you a prompt that you had to include in your fic. I was always really proud of the stories I created from those challenges (No Earthly Means and Elephant in the Room if you want to read them).

I enjoyed writing Dead to Rights which is an XF/Dead Like Me crossover because I loved the challenge of writing a crossover. It was the first crossover I ever tried writing even though I only recently published it.

Otherwise, I like re-reading In a Graveyard, Importuning Life for Life, and Some By Virtue Fall. Of my more recent fic, I like Slap a Goatee on Me and Call Me Evil because the premise was ridiculous and I think it's funny as all get out.

Probably my favourite of my VM fic was Stay Outta Riverdale. Because: 1. The title is a Simpsons reference who doesn't love a Simpsons reference? And 2. I think I was hilarious throughout it.

Do you think you'll ever write another X-Files story? Or dust off and post an oldie that for whatever reason never made it online?

I'm always open to writing more fic (and, of course, I don't mean my WIPs…don't look at me like that). Lately, my only motivation has been from writing prompts on Tumblr. I haven't had anyone give me a prompt in over a year, so here we are. I have snippets of dialogue in journals and word documents that have never found their way into stories. I'd be happy to dust off any of those and shoehorn them into a new story.

Do you still write fic now? Or other creative work?

The last fanfic I wrote was a mini-fic over a year ago (with a prompt from Lilydale!). I've written a bit of original fiction but I haven't been able to finish it. Otherwise, I do have a number of real life hobbies which are where my creative outlets lie now.

Where do you get ideas for stories?

Lately, challenges and prompts. It used to be from wanting to see more from a scene. I really had a thing for fill-in-the-blanks or scene continuations. And sometimes my motivation is just plain old spite. :)

What's the story behind your pen name?

Circe Invidiosa is the title of a painting by John William Waterhouse. Love the colours and the absolute malice on the face of the subject. It felt like a good pen name – the envious witch. That's me!

I chose it when I posted my first XF fic (which I cringe to read now, ugh so terrible) without knowing there was already a Circe in the fandom. Whoops. I tried to go by the full Circe Invidiosa or Invidiosa as much as possible after realizing that (invidiosa is my url and my username on a lot of sites, etc.). Now I think that I've been around long enough that it doesn't matter as much but I still like it.

As I said, I took the name Invida for the VM fandom which is just a shortening of Invidiosa.

Do your friends and family know about your fic and, if so, what have been their reactions?

My significant other knows and that was quite a reveal (oh how awkward). However, the SO has been very supportive and has read all my stories since the reveal and sometimes betas them. The SO also wants us to collaborate on writing some original fiction but we haven't found a project that works for both of us creatively or timewise.

My BFF knows because I dragged her into the online fandom. We've known each other since we were 14, but our love of XF really solidified our bond in our 20s. She wrote some short but sweet fics under the penname Helen Quilley which I bullied her into posting, and we wrote Of Ladies Most Deject and Wretched together. She is mostly embarrassed that she wrote fanfic now but we still fangirl together.

No one else really knows other than fandom folks I've met in real life. And some friends know I've written 'short stories' but I don't elaborate. I work in a stodgy, uptight industry where anything fun or actually having a life is frowned upon.

Is there a place online (tumblr, twitter, AO3, etc.) where people can find you and/or your stories now?

Over the first lockdown, I got my shit together and got my fic site, invidiosa.com, up and running again. My site houses fic by Rain (now @doctorhelena on Tumblr and AO3), Helen Quilley, ML (who I miss so much), Folieadeux, Shelba, TLynn, Oracle, Piper Sargasso, Diehard, and me. And I made all their dustjackets (except Folie's). The site got hacked a few years back and it was so much work to get running again that I put it off for years and years. I still feel terrible that I did not get the site back up before ML passed away, especially when ML had asked me about it a few months before she passed.

Anyway, all my XF fic is here: circe.invidiosa.com. I have 3 of my newer XF stories on AO3. And my fic-LJ also has some of my stories. Some of the newer stories are on Tumblr but the tagging is so erratic that I'd have to list several tags before you'd find them all. I don't know why I haven't moved everything over to AO3. Probably laziness.

I'm @invidiosa on Tumblr. I'm still on E-muse. I'm still on LJ. I'm always reachable by e-mail (invidiosa at gmail).

Is there anything else you'd like to share with fans of X-Files fic?

Thanks for reading, writing, and commenting. It is always appreciated.

(Posted by Lilydale on January 5, 2021)

#new post #old school x #xfiles fanfic #xf fanfic #xf fanfic author interviews #circe invidiosa

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