#i might be cooking with these revamps chat

[wereh0gz]

Hey remember when I said I was turning Eterna into a "just for me" thing?

I lied

Have a sneak peek of Zephyr's new design + a wip of Siren's

[lalahbug]

Only One Night? Levi x Chubby!Reader

Fandom: Attack on Titan Word Count: 2,218

My Masterlist

Warnings/disclaim: general Modern AU! Talks about sex, but no actual smut

Author’s Note: continued under story Originally posted on DeviantArt, under the same username, on 10/26/2016. Revamped/edited in 2020.

___ is a blank for your name/oc/whatever you prefer Written in 3rd person

Line/header is to separate paragraphs to indicate time skips, as Tumblr hates my formatting.

Story under cut

         ___ slowly got out of the stranger's bed, checking the time on her phone, it was almost the time she had to be home. She cursed quietly before wandering the room, gathering her clothes and putting them on. Being as silent as possible, careful to not wake the stranger from his bed. She saw a notebook on his nightstand, she leaned over and wrote a quick note which read; ‘Last night was amazing, thank you for being gentle. It was my first time. I hope you have a wonderful life!’ She smiled to herself and grabbed her purse.          She opened his door, locking the handle, so he’d be safe. Then she walked out of his apartment, put her heels back on, then quickly walked to her car. In a hurry to get home before her dad got pissed off at her.

         Levi woke up with pain in his eyes from lack of sleep. He glanced over at his clock, 3:18 AM. The notebook on his nightstand grabbed his attention, seeing something written on it, he grabbed it. He furrowed his brow before glancing over at the other side of his bed. He honestly didn’t expect her to leave. He wanted her to stay, he didn’t even get her phone number or her last name. He groaned a bit.           ‘What the fuck does she mean, first time? Was she a virgin or was it her first one night stand.’ He thought to himself for a moment. He decided to change his sheets since he was up now. He spotted a bit of blood. ‘Okay, so she was a virgin. Then why did she want to lose it to a stranger and only do a one night stand? She had to be at least 21 because she got a drink from the bar.’ He tried to replay last night in his mind.

          ___ was in a simple black dress, drinking at the bar. Ignoring everyone and everything, obviously, she was there to just drink and didn’t have any intention of getting laid. That’s what caught Levi’s eye. She was beautiful, some might think she’s chubby. But to him, she was just very curvy, which wasn’t too common in this night club. Levi had gone up to her, saying hello. At first, she ignored him.          “Oi, brat. You can at least say hello back.” Levi glared at her, she glanced over at him. Before she looked to her side and behind her.          “Are you talking to me?”          “No. I was talking to your drink.” She giggled, she had a really cute smile. “So what are you doing here?” Levi took the stool next to her, to sit on it.          “Oh, I just had a really bad day, so I decided to try and make myself somewhat pretty and to go drinking. I brought a few friends, but they’ve all left with some guys.”          “Why didn’t you go with them?”          She gave him a dry chuckle. “I wasn’t invited.”          “Then why were your friends?”          “Because they’re pretty and lean. And I’m ugly and fat.” Levi wanted to lecture at her for thinking that, but the way she said it. It didn’t seem like they were her words, but words she’s heard a lot.          “Who thinks that?”          “My family, some guys, and almost every guy here.” She downed her drink.          “Your family says that to you?”          “Well, my dad. He wants to marry me off to a wealthy man, who is willing to deal with me. So far, every suitor agrees with him. That I’m not attractive and I don’t have an ideal body.”          “Your dad and those guys must have shit stuck in their eyes.” She giggled at his joke again. “Because you’re really beautiful.” He saw her face flush before she looked away. “Hey, how about we go talk somewhere else? I don’t want to be around these idiots anymore.”          She gave him a small smile. "Okay.” He took her hand and guided her out of the club. They went to a restaurant to chat and then they were at his place.

         Levi smirked thinking about last night while getting dressed for work. But then got annoyed because she fucking just left him alone. He groaned before grabbing what he needed and left.

         ___ was lectured once she got home at 2:30 AM because she was 30 minutes late home. Once again, her father told her that she had to stay pure, since she’s so unattractive, being pure is the only bargain chip left. ___ felt her heart almost break, realizing that she would have to tell him soon, that she is no longer a virgin. She quickly went down to her room, to the basement, where she lived. She was going to school, so she wanted to stay with her parents until she got her degree which her parents wanted her to finish. Since they both believed, she’d never get married so she’d have to support herself.          She was on a small break in between semesters, with no homework to do to distract herself. She decided to make herself happy by cleaning. She loved to cook and clean, usually only doing the downstairs, so today she would clean the whole house. Once her parents were gone, of course, dad at work, mom out with the girls.

         “Ackerman.” Levi stopped in his tracks and looked over to his boss, Mr. Lowells.          “Yes, sir?”          “We just landed a new campaign, I need someone to lead it. You will have to do a lot of paperwork with me for the next few days if you want it.”          “I’d be fine to do that.”          “Then after lunch, we can go to my home office. So it’s quieter and easier to get through everything.”          “Yes, sir.” Levi continued to his office before sighing with relief. “Finally, I won’t have to work under Shitty Glasses anymore.”

         Mr. Lowells walked into his home with Levi.          “Thought you said it’d be quieter here,” Levi stated with an annoyed tone, as music rang through the house, it wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t quiet.          “___!” Mr. Lowells shouted. Levi froze as he heard her name then his eyes widened as she popped her head around the corner, the music was abruptly turned off. Her father walked towards where she had popped her head out.          “Sorry, dad. I didn’t think you’d be home this early, so I wanted to clean and make dinner. I’ll finish up polishing the floors. Then if you’d like I can get you and your partner something to drink. Then I’ll go downstairs, so I don’t bother you.” She rambled. Her eyes never leaving her father.          “I don’t mind your cleaning.” He stared her up and down, she was in a tank top and some loose sleep pants. “You look disgusting, though. If you bring us anything, at least make sure to cover your fat first.” ___ hugged her arms, trying to hide them.          “Yes, sir. I apologize.” ___ focused her gaze onto the floor.          “Come on, Ackerman, we have work to do.” Mr. Howells turned on his heel and Levi followed. Trying to process everything in his mind. Everything she had told him last night to remember little things he had heard about her before from Mr. Howells.          “Your office is nice,” Levi stated as he sat down on the couch in the room, spreading out his material over the coffee table.          “Looks like she cleaned in here first since there’s no dust.” He sighed before sitting down in his chair. Levi was pleased with her cleaning. “My daughter, she’s sweet and can cook and clean very well. She’s decently smart too. But, because of how she is and looks, I can never get anyone to marry her. I’ve been looking for years. She gets fatter and uglier as the years go by.” Mr. Howells ran a hand through his hair. Levi was fuming, trying to keep his composure.          “Anyways, sorry you heard all that. Let’s get to work.”

         About an hour had passed before ___ knocked on her father’s door. “Enter.”          “Hey, dad.” ___ only took a couple of steps inside, but Levi could see she changed into a loose-fitting baggy shirt and some jeans. “What would you like to drink?”          “Coffee, black. You, Ackerman?” Levi finally got her to meet his eyes, her whole face flushed.          “Black tea.” Levi gave her a small smirk.          “Okay! I’ll be back in a few then.” ___ squeaked before slowly leaving the room.          Levi was hoping that would be her reaction to remembering him.          “She’s so weird.” Her father grumbled. Levi ignored him and got back to work.

         Once again, a soft knock came, she was told to enter. She kept her eyes on the tray in her hand. She placed the coffee in front of her father. She completely avoided Levi’s gaze, placing his tea in front of him.          “Thanks, beautiful,” Levi whispered to her, once again her face flushed before she quickly left the room. Levi took a sip of his tea, it was perfect, just like her cleaning and her. “Sir, where is your bathroom?”          “Oh, it’s down the hall, the last door on the right.” Levi stood up and headed out of the room.          “Oi, brat,” Levi called out to her, making her freeze in her tracks, he walked up to her. “You could have at least left me your phone number since you ran away.”          “I didn’t think you’d want it. I didn’t want to make a fool out of myself.” She whispered nervously. “I didn’t mean to run away, I had to be home by 2 AM, I was still late back home, though.”          “Well, you made a fucking fool out of me. I got to be with a wonderful woman last night, then she disappeared into the morning. Because I forgot to get her last name and phone number. I was made a fool.”          “I didn’t mean to. Please don’t tell my father. I have to tell him or it’ll be worse for me.”          “Tell him, what?”          “That I’m not a virgin anymore.” She blushed a bit and focused her eyes on her feet. Oh, she's adorable.          “I can’t believe that my boss is your asshole father. I’ve wanted to hit him since I realized it was you. You looked really sexy while cleaning.” He cupped her cheek, pulling her face up to kiss her softly. “If you are so scared of what your father will say, why did you have sex with me?”          “Because I was weak, you were the first person to tell me I was beautiful. The care and love in your eyes. It was something I had never seen before. Even if it was fake to get a girl into your bed. I felt special for once in my life.” Her eyes were starting to water. “You don’t have to pretend anymore, to care I mean. Our one night, it made me really happy, because I felt loved and wanted for a few hours. So thank you.”          “Would you stop fucking crying.” Levi sneered. “I don’t fake shit like this. I said you’re beautiful because I think so. I said your dad is an ass because I think so. I had sex with you because I wanted you. I was pissed you fucking treated me like a one night stand because I want to see more of you. I want you. I want to have sex with you more than once. Even though we did it 4 times.” He chuckled as the crimson spread down her neck.          “So, you like me?”          “That’s an understatement. I fell in love with you the moment you down your drink. The moment you blushed at my compliment. Fuck, I think I fell in love, the moment I saw you.” Pulling her close to him. “You’re coming home with me tonight and you better fucking be there when I wake up.”          “Ackerman.” Levi glanced over at Mr. Howells's confused face. “What are you doing?”          “Trying to get her to come home with me.” Levi deadpanned, he wanted her to know he was being serious, that he honestly loved her.          Mr. Howells chuckled for a moment, before seeing Levi’s eyes scan back over her face.          “Are you serious?”          “Of course. You were complaining about her never getting married. Whatever offer you’ve made before on her, give it to me.”          “What?” They both looked at him in shock.          “You fucking heard me. Let me marry her. She’s beautiful, she gets my sense of humor, makes good tea, and loves to clean. If you would have told me about her and shown me a picture of her when you started all this shit. I would have taken her off your hands. I’m willing to do it right now.”          “Levi, shut up," she whispered.                    “Fucking, brat. Don’t tell me to shut up.” He looked over at Mr. Howells. “So? Are we planning a wedding or what?”          Mr. Howells smiled at Levi. “Yeah, we can start after we get this new campaign settled.”          “Good, because I’ve already had sex with her.”          “Levi!” She smacked his arm slightly.          “Is that why you were late home this morning?” She could only nod. “Well, you’re marrying him, so I'm not upset.”          “Do I get any say in this?” She asked.          “No.” Her father said sternly.          “You’re mine, don’t you dare think about running from me, again.” She squirmed in his arms from his glare on her. “Hey, sir. Are we done for the day?”          “Yeah.”          "Good.” Levi picked up ___, over his shoulder. "Then I’ll be taking her home with me now.”          Her face flushed again, trying to get out of his arms. She giggled a bit when he swore at her for moving too much. And for once, her father finally saw the beauty in his child. He smiled at her, as Levi walked out the door with her.

Author’s Note: continued (While editing this my tortillas almost burned, oop. Welp, time to eat some amazing tacos.) I feel like Levi would never be the type to do a one night stand. (That may be just blind love for him but it is what I think~) So thus this was born.

[d-criss-news]

When it was announced that The Rosie O'Donnell Show would be back for one night only with a guest list of about 15 million Broadway talents, many of us wondered, would it be a return to the glory days of her multiple Emmy-winning daytime talk show or more like her ill-fated attempt to resuscitate the primetime variety format on NBC in 2008. It turned out to borrow from both those predecessors while evolving into something completely different — a low-tech lovefest that felt like eavesdropping on a group chat among friends looking out for one another in a time of need.

It was spontaneous, messy and blighted by some of the worst audio glitches imaginable. Yet it was often affectingly intimate, and even over an endurance-testing three-and-a-half commercial-free hours, also strangely addictive. The lack of slickness seemed to carry through to the relaxed manner of the guests, and their refreshing unpretentiousness.

Conceived by actor-producer (and occasional tech-support helpmate) Erich Bergen and live-streamed on Broadway.com and the website's YouTube channel, the show was a benefit for The Actors Fund, the charitable organization founded in 1882 that supports performers and behind-the-scenes theater workers. It raised more than half-a-million dollars, O'Donnell announced at the end of the marathon, sitting in a Hamilton hoodie and offering a champagne toast in a glass emblazoned with the face of Barbra Streisand.

She conducted the entire show from behind a laptop in her New Jersey garage, its floor spattered with the paint spillage of countless craft projects. "I'm a little bit of a Broadway nerd, I admit it," said O'Donnell, establishing her dual role as host and superfan.

Part of the show's unique pleasure was seeing favorite Broadway performers chilling in their own homes, almost all of them dressed down, with little visible attention to makeup or hair, and zero concern about unflattering angles. It was a great equalizer, proving that even artists who can hold packed theaters in the palm of their hands with a song are housebound and trying to make the best of a bad situation just like the rest of us — staying close to their families, killing time, learning to cook, wondering how long this unnerving isolation will last. Or how much longer we can put off that shower.

It was kind of comforting to see Idina Menzel sitting by her microwave and confessing, "I guess I'm going a little bonkers," while lamenting a failed lasagna attempt and sharing the challenges of homeschooling her son when she's no math genius. Likewise, hearing Matthew Broderick and Sarah Jessica Parker talk about watching Columbo reruns or catching up on The Crown, while SJP begged for no spoilers on the final episode of The Sopranos, which she may now get to at last. Seeing Annette Bening on her Los Angeles balcony wearing a "Make America Kind Again" baseball cap was as much a tonic as watching Neil Patrick Harris do a card trick with his adorable twins. And who doesn't want to meet Gloria and Emilio Estefan's cute rescue dogs or hear about Lin-Manuel Miranda's kids' reaction to their first exposure to Singin' in the Rain?

Then there were the musical interludes.

Where else could you catch Patti LuPone, in magnificent voice, singing the urgently upbeat 1930s standard "A Hundred Years From Today," unaccompanied while sitting by the jukebox in her basement? Or Kelli O'Hara nestled into an armchair honoring Stephen Sondheim's 90th birthday by wrapping her crystalline soprano around "Take Me to the World," a hymn to unity from Evening Primrose? Or husband and wife Audra McDonald and Will Swenson duetting on the Charlie Chaplin evergreen, "Smile," from their Westchester living room? Or Darren Criss pouring his heart into another Sondheim classic about the desire for connection, "Being Alive," from Company, accompanying himself in a lovely pop arrangement on acoustic guitar from the sofa of his Los Angeles home? And while sound problems plagued Barry Manilow's selection of hits, ending with "I Made It Through the Rain," I was tickled to see his Judy Garland Kleenex dispenser.

Many of the song choices were thoughtfully apropos of the current crisis, offering comforting reassurance of the eventual return of resilience and togetherness while people in major cities all over the country self-isolate as the infection rate of the coronavirus pandemic continues to climb. Maybe Tituss Burgess at his home keyboard singing "The Glory of Love" is exactly the kind of uplift we all need right now.

Even in the seemingly random numbers, the entire enterprise was characterized by a spirit of generosity and sharing.

Kristin Chenoweth celebrated a Starbucks romance in "Taylor the Latte Boy." Matthew Morrison goofed it up on ukulele to a mashup of "The Bare Necessities" and "Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah" from his Disney Dreamin' album. Alan Menken whipped through a medley of his songs from The Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast and Little Shop of Horrors, among others, at the piano. Ben Platt, also at the keyboard, did Bob Dylan's "Make You Feel My Love." And Adrienne Warren, the sensational star of Tina: The Tina Turner Musical, growled out "Simply the Best" from her bathtub. That was on the third attempt during a particularly troublesome audio patch, by which time her bubbles were history.

Prompted by O'Donnell, more than one guest reminded viewers that The Actors Fund is not just about Broadway artists pulling star salaries but also stagehands, makeup artists, wigmakers and ushers who work in what is very much a gig economy. The organization provides emergency financial assistance, social services, affordable housing, healthcare and insurance counseling and addiction support.

"Everything's a one-off," said Tony-winning actor Brian Stokes Mitchell, who serves as chairman of The Actors Fund. "That's how we get by, and many people are living on the edge right now."

"We're all just one, two, maybe three paychecks away from bankruptcy," added Billy Porter, whose mother is in an Actors Fund nursing home. "In this community, our whole job description is insecurity," said Judith Light.

Porter, along with Lea Salonga and longtime activist Light recalled how Broadway was on the frontlines of another life-threatening struggle during the early days of the AIDS crisis. All of them urged viewers to stay strong and take the time to reflect on the value of solidarity.

While O'Donnell has never been shy about her opposition to Donald Trump and everything he stands for, the show was remarkably light on politics, with just the occasional dig slipping through. She opened with a little celebratory "Yay!" while admitting she had missed the president's daily coronavirus press update, and then explained that she and her guests were not there to talk Trump. When Harvey Fierstein, O'Donnell's 2005 stage husband in Fiddler on the Roof, reminded her of all the election work still to be done, she said, "Let's all just know, we deserve a leader who tells the truth." And the delays in making coronavirus testing more widely available prompted a comment that the government should have gotten busy on that back in January when the writing was already on the wall.

Mostly, however, the hastily revamped Rosie O'Donnell Show was about bringing people together at this time of anxiety and isolation, as the host reconnected with artists whom she has championed since her reign as the Queen of Nice. "Everyone in the community loves you," she told Chita Rivera in a particularly effusive greeting. "You are our queen mother!"

Many of the performers would have been decompressing after rehearsals or Sunday matinees if the Broadway shutdown hadn't happened — Criss in American Buffalo, Broderick and Parker in Plaza Suite, Warren in Tina, Lauren Patten and Elizabeth Stanley in Jagged Little Pill. Sunday would have been LuPone's opening night in the gender-flipped revival of Company. Gavin Creel, who abruptly ended his London run in Waitress to fly home and is in isolation in a cabin in upstate New York, revealed the fear that he might have contracted the virus, given that several others in the cast have fallen ill, with one of them testing positive.

The show bridged the gap separating us from artists whose work we normally experience on the other side of the footlights. Most of us will never again get to see Stephen Sondheim and Andrew Lloyd Webber exchange greetings in song on the birthday the two composers happen to share. From those celebrated veterans to rising-star newbies, the common denominator here was everybody facing the crisis just like us, reaching out a hand of friendship, albeit from a mandatory safe distance.

[icansavetoday]

Hello! Just a quick update to let you all know that I (finally!) revamped my rules and added a few things. Nothing major, but I’ll include some of the highlights below!

So with the trailer coming out tomorrow (who else is excited?!) I figured that (a) I would remind everyone of what tags I use so that you can avoid the inevitable flailing and (b) give an idea of the things I’m trying to avoid as we get closer to the movie. That being said I’m probably gonna wanna do all things 1984 now!

Spoilers: I do my best to tag anything about the upcoming movie (Wonder Woman 1984) with the following tags: spoilers, ❝ ( what is it? ) the future — ( spoilers )  • & ❝ i know times are changin’ – it’s time we all reach out for something new — ( 1984 )  • ; I also tag all images with: ❝ above average — ( visage )  • ; At the moment I’m personally trying to avoid anything that hasn’t been officially released, including rumors and plot leaks. This may narrow further as we get even closer to the movie but at most will involve me limiting my time on the dash. All I ask from you is that if we’re threading and/or chatting please don’t assume that I know (or want to know) certain details.

Next, as we enter the new year, I’ve made it my personal goal to try and be a bit more proactive when it comes to interacting with my followers. We’ll see how this goes. But because you might get a random meme from me out of the blue I figured I should explain how I view and incorporate them on my blog.

In general, I tend to think of memes as throwing pasta at the wall and seeing what sticks. Sometimes a prompt sparks the imagination, sometimes it doesn’t, sometimes it needs to cook a bit longer. Not responding to a meme does not mean a lack of interest and if you don’t like the direction I take a prompt (or vice versa) we can always try again down the road, no hard feelings.

And finally, a few other odds and ends:

I updated a few points to reflect the fact that I now have verses and that I now respond to asks as separate text posts. 

“While I can’t always reply to things right away, I do make it a point to ‘like’ posts as I receive them to give my writing partners an idea of what may or may not be in my drafts.” (I’m trying to get back into the habit of this, especially since I’m still a bit spotty with activity.)   

When do I unfollow inactive blogs? Usually, after a month.

I’m probably forgetting something, but those are definitely the most important bits. Thanks for reading and enjoy your weekend! 

[hidayasu]

Weredad (Revamped)

AKA Frozer (revamped) chapter 2 (Chapter 1 is here)

I just want to preface this by saying I absolutely LOVED this episode and have so much fun watching it, and the only reason I’m “revamping” it is because it’s the only episode I could think of that would change significantly with my little AU, since… well, ya know.

SLIGHT BACKSTORY

Marinette knows the truth now, but because she doesn’t want “Ladybug” to fall under gossip, AND because Chat Noir still needs constant reminders to focus on his work, she refrains from telling him her feelings.

Lol just kidding, she just chickens out every time she tries.

Now, onward!

Gargantuan was a terrifying enemy, for being so adorable.

“Wow, my heart is just like that yoyo wrapped baby’s wrist,” he flirted, oblivious to Ladybug’s growing irritation as she wrestled with the gargantuan baby. “Taken prisoner by my lady forever.”

He leaned in for a kiss, but was cruelly denied. Not by Ladybug this time, but by said baby’s wrist finally pulling her away and hurling her into the air. Her yoyo fell loose, and she sailed and faceplanted right into a billboard. Forcefully peeling her face away, she looked up to see it was a familiar billboard of a certain handsome young model smiling up into the sky.

She sighed wistfully. “Not as much as my heart’s been taken by you...” she whispered dreamily to the board, before gravity inevitably took hold and pulled her down.

But Cat Noir was quick to come to her aid, dashing forward in time to catch her in his arms, “Admit it, for a second there you almost fell for my poetic verse.”

And here, faced with the reality, she leered flatly and pushed away his face as she slipped out of his arms. Why was she in love with this idiot again? “I think I prefer the billboard,” she quipped airily.

“I could get you your own poster,” he offered, leaning on his extending pole like a cane and putting a hand on his hip with a flirtatious smirk. “That way you’ll be able to see me even when we’re apart.”

She panicked. “What- no, that is ridiculous! Why would I want to have a ton of pictures of you pasted all over my room to pine after you everyday?”

He blinked. Then gave an eager grin as he waggled his brows. “That could also be arranged!”

“I mean… LUCKY CHARM!” She chanted, being saved by a massive plastic donut ring, which Cat Noir was gracious enough to let her nearly get squashed with by herself.

They made quick work of the akumatized baby, using the donut as a springboard to get the pacifier. Picking up said pacifier wound up creating a whole new set of problems, as Ladybug forgot to hand it over to Cat Noir along with August before she swung away. Cat Noir just wanted to catch her before she vanished, hoping she had also noticed the mishap. But when he pole-vaulted onto the roof, he was surprised not to see his Lady, but someone else. “Marinette?”

Marinette froze, smiling nervously as she looked everywhere for any possible exit.

“This isn’t the first time I’ve bumped into you right after Ladybug was transformed back,” he mused, fingers at his chin as he fell into thought. And then he gasped, eyes dawning in realization. “Could you be…?”

“Iiiiiiin love with you!” she cried, running to throw her arms around him.

Dead silence as he gaped, beyond stunned as he looked down at her. “Marinette?”

She gasped, pulled back with a squeak, and grabbed her flushing face with ever widening eyes, not hearing the door to her room being opened behind her. Least not until her father spoke up.

“Well I never, whoa!”

‘This is a disaster!!!’ She internally screamed.

It was at this point Cat Noir’s miraculous started beeping. Saved by the bell. “Oh! Well, perfect timing! I have to go take him back to his mother,” he informed, bringing out his staff and elongating it to prepare for the jump.

But Tom’s large hand clapped his shoulder, halting his escape. “Wait! Why don’t you come have Sunday brunch with us tomorrow?”

Looking up at the tall, broad, overly cheery man, Cat Noir could only smile nervously in response. He glanced at Marinette, who had looked at her father in horror, and then focused on him in increasing wonderment. Was this her chance? Could her wildest dreams of getting an actual date with Adrien be coming true?

“I-I’ll make macaroons!” Marinette offered, jumping beside her father and making him lean back. “I’ll bake all your favorite foods!”

He blinked. “My favorite foods?”

“Uh, if, you tell me what those are,” she amended with a nervous grin.

“There’s really no need.” he assured quickly. “I’m sure anything you make will be fine!”

“YES!” Marinette cried with a jump to the air, hurling her arms around him again. It was only at this moment he realized his attempt to stave off her efforts became an agreement to go. “Thank you, Cat Noir! You won’t regret it!” She promised, already running to her door, barely avoiding her stunned mother in the process.

He waved to her, even though she was already going down, and turned to quickly polevault off the roof before his time ran out.

“Wow, I had no idea Marinette was so in love with me,” He marveled to the cooing baby in his arm. “I just thought she was a fan.”

August grinned and gurgled in response.

“Tell me about it. Man, could you imagine Ladybug doing all that for me?” He sighed wistfully. “Inviting me over, making my favorite foods with her own two hands?” He sighed again, this time in dejection. “Why does the first girl to tell me she loves me have to be just a friend?”

-

“I SAID IT, Tikki!” Marinette said, already pulling out the bowls and sheets she’d need. “I can’t believe I finally did it! Even if it was just to cover up the fact that I’m Ladybug.”

“Way to go, Marinette!” Tikki praised. “Now’s your chance to win him over as yourself!”

“I know! It’s a longshot, but maybe if I can impress him enough, he’ll start noticing me instead!”

“Don’t you mean “as well”?” She teased.

She chuckled. “Yeah, I guess so.”

“Just be careful, Marinette. You’re not supposed to know it’s Adrien.”

“That’s right! I can’t make all his favorite foods!” She bemoaned, before going into thought. “Buuuut I can make one and say it’s a lucky guess!”

“Marinette!” Came her father’s voice, making Tikki fly into her coin purse before her parents rushed down the stairs. “Oh, I see you’ve already started!”

“Almost! I gotta start the- wait, no, that’d be too suspicious,” she amended, tapping her chin in thought. “Oh! We can have the- no, that won’t work either!”

“How about,” her father cut-in, “A delicious sweetheart vol-au-vent?”

“That’s perfect! And we can finish up with some passionfruit macaroons!”

“That’s my girl!” He cheered, quickly pulling out his apron. “I’ll help. But don’t worry, I’ll be sure to leave all the hard work to you.” He winked.

She hopped up to kiss him on the cheek. “You can start with turning on the oven,”

Sabine, who had followed after at a slower pace, stayed out of their hair for the most part, going to finish her cup of tea. “Tom, can I talk to you for a minute?”

“Sure thing, sweetie, what is it?” He asked, darting to stand in front of her as Marinette went to pulling out the ingredients she’d need.

“Well, it’s just,” She dropped her voice to a whisper. “I don’t remember Cat Noir ever saying he liked Marinette back. I mean you two did pressure him a bit into coming. I’m just worried you might be jumping a little ahead of yourselves.”

“Pressured? Nonsense, he’ll love to come!” Tom said loudly, and boisterously, sweeping up a surprised, but giggling Marinette excitedly in his arms. “And he’ll be swept off his feet by my daughter’s fantastic cooking!”

Several kilometers away, Cat Noir finally arrived to his home, leaping in through his bedroom window in time for his miraculous to power off, de-transforming him.

Plagg jeered. “Well well well, look who’s gone and got himself an admirer!”

“Marinette in love with Cat Noir,” He grasped his chin in thought. “I didn’t think he was her type. But for her to go through all this trouble, she must have it really bad.”

Plagg, not at all concerned with the specifics, went straight to the cupboard where Adrien stored his stash of Camembert. “Exactly! And now we’ll be enjoying some warm and crispy bread to go with very bit of cheese! Our life is about to change!”

“Stop it, Plagg, you know I’m in love with Ladybug.”

“What? But you already agreed to go!”

“Yeah, because I didn’t want to hurt her feelings,” he argued, already heading into his bathroom. “But that doesn’t mean I feel the same way.”

“That’s your problem, you’re too worried about pleasing people,” he said, gobbling down his cheese. “But who knows? You might find it’s not such a bad thing having two pots simmering on the stove. Especially when there’s only one pooooooot… ” this last part he murmured to himself with a cackle as he took down his second piece.

“What am I going to do? “ He wondered as he leaned over his sink. “I don’t want to break her heart. “If it’s just brunch, maybe I can let her down easy.”

“That’s the spirit! Waiting until after she bakes you a homemade meal and invites you into her home to meet her parents is the perfect way to let her down easy!”

Adrien sighed, already dreading the oncoming morning.

Said morning found Marinette on her balcony, searching the cloudy sky.

“He’s not coming,” she whispered in dread. “Hggggggh Tikki I knew this was a bad idea! Of course he would never come! He’s too in love with Ladybug to even think about going for someone else!”

“Who knows? Cat Noir has been rejected by “Ladybug” so many times, maybe he’s changed his mind?”

“You think so?” She asked hopefully. “I mean wait- I mean no! I don’t want him to stop loving Ladybug! I just want him to love me too!”

“Here he comes!” Tikki spotted him.

Marinette squeaked, dashing down her door, down the staircase to their apartment. “Dad! Is the table ready!?”

“Sure is!”

“The vol-au-vents?”

“Check!”

“Drinks?”

“Check!”

“Souffle, omlette, macaroons?”

“Check, check, check! Don’t worry my little nouget,” he cooed, pinching her cheek. “I made sure everything is perfect for you!”

“Daaaad,” she whined. “Don’t treat me like a little kid!”

“I know, I know, it’s just,” he sniffed, wiping at his eye with his finger. “I just can’t believe you’ve grown so much already!”

She couldn’t help but smile, not staying mad at him for long. And then the doorbell rang, and her smile dropped in terror.

“He’s here!” Tom cheered. “Alright sweetie, now go on and let him in!”

She swallowed, walking stiffly to the door. She stared at the door nervously for a second, glancing back at her parents for support. Tom gave a thumbs up while her mother nodded encouragingly. She took a breath, straightened her spine, and opened the door. And there stood Cat Noir, just as stiff and holding a single, pink rose.

“Uh, hello Marinette,” he waved almost… shyly. So unlike Cat Noir.

She stared at the flower in surprise, too stunned to say anything as she blushed, thus giving way for Tom to step up and pick Cat Noir up in a massive bearhug.

“Welcome to our HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOME!”

“Tom!” Sabie admonished. “Let him up for some air!”

“OH, right,” He let him back down, placing him in front of Marinette, and turning him smartly around.

Taking a fearful glance behind him. Cat Noir held up the rose in offering. Marinette took it, the gentle pink matching the soft rose on her cheeks. So close to the rose was she that she didn’t notice Cat Noir leaning in until it was too late. He kissed one cheek and then the other in a proper Parisian greeting. And Marinette, as calm and collected as she was, instantly started to melt.

‘He kissed my cheek… Adrien kissed my cheek!’

“Marinette are you alright?” He asked suddenly in alarm at her too-red and too-hot face.

“Y-yeah, I’m fine,” she sighed, turning on her heel. “I’ll go get food...”

But of course, being even more distracted than usual, it was only natural that one foot tripped over the tip of the other as she turned, and she yelped as she went down. But she never hit ground, Cat Noir’s cat-like reflexes catching her mid-fall.

“Marinette!”/“Sweetie!”

“Are you sure you’re alright?” He asked worriedly. He’d caught her by the waist, the other hand grasping her empty hand as he brought her back up. “Maybe you should sit down for a bit.”

Marinette stuttered and mumbled for a moment, before her daydreaming was cut-short at the suggestion. “What? No! I can’t, you’re the guest!” She swiveled around to push him toward the table. “You should be the one to sit down.”

He let her push him tot he awaiting table. “W-Well uh, if you insist...”

“I do!” she sat him down at his place. “Don’t worry, it’ll take more than that to keep me down. Now, for the first course!” She darted into the kitchen.

“Uh, Marinette!” Her mother called. “Maybe you should let us bring you the food.”

“Since, uh, it is your date, after all!”

Cat Noir stuttered. “D-Date?!”

“It’s fine, guys, I got it!” She assured, pulling out the tray. “Ta-da! Freshly made vol-au-vent, with candied oranges!”

She wasn’t kidding. The wafting scent told him they had been made just this morning (hough in reality, the dough and filling had been made last night and then baked this morning).  He leaned over the table eagerly, smelling the warm, yet tangy aroma filling him with promises of food and comfort. His mouth watered just looking at them. “They look amazing!”

“Y-yeah,” she said, eyes already on the floor. She tip-toed with long strides awkwardly. “J-just wait until you try them...”

“Is something on the floor?” He asked, leaning over to peer confusedly where she was stepping.

“Nope! Just, uh, creating suspense!” she excused, holding the tray out for him.

His jade eyes sparkled eagerly as he plucked a pastry and popped it in his mouth. His eyes closed in sheer bliss and he hummed in contentment. “This is amazing, Marinette!”

“That’s our Marinette! She has the Dupain baking genes! She could teach you a thing or two about baking you know.”

“Daaaaaad,” Marinette hissed.

“O-oh, uh, thanks for the offer, but I’m no good at cooking. Besides, I wouldn’t have the time. With uh, saving Paris, and all,” He excused, taking another puff.

“Well how can you expect to run the bakery if you can’t bake?”

“Tom!”

“Dad!”

Choke.

Marinette groaned. “He can’t be a baker, he’s a model. Citizen!” She squeaked quickly, ignoring the hero’s stunned face. “Model citizen! Saving the day, chasing Akumas, it’s a very demanding job!” She said, Cat Noir nodding emphatically behind her.

“Well he won’t be a superhero forever!” the man argued. “And he needs to be thinking about the future! How about “The Dupain- Cat Noir Bakery”, huh? It’s Purrfect if I do say so myself!”

Marinette grimaced, especially seeing Cat Noir’s cornered expression, so she zipped into the kitchen, plopped down the vol-au-vents and took out the souffle. “Whoooo wants the next course?” She darted back to the table, slamming it down to get everyone’s attention.

Of course, the force with which she slammed down the heavy rammekin nearly toppled the tiny table, and the swing sent a few utensils flying. Cat Noir leaped onto his chair, snatching the plates and using them to catch every glass and flying fork and knife before it hit a single person, finishing it off with a graceful dancer’s pose.

“Wow, Cat Noir,” Sabine clapped. “You really are quite impressive!”

“Thank you, Mrs. Dupain-Cheng,” He said, bowing at the waist before setting the plates down. “I amaze even myself sometimes.”

“Come along, Marinette,” her father offered, “I’ll serve the food, and you just relax and chat with Cat Noir.”

Marinette pouted as she followed her father’s advice, taking her seat next to him. Sabine quickly set the table again as Tom went to cutting the food, and Cat Noir rubbed at his arm uneasily.

“Listen, Marinette, before this goes any further, you should know I-” Then he stopped, sniffing the air. “Is something burning?”

“The macaroons!” Tom yelled suddenly. “Marinette, did you take them out of the oven?!”

Marinette screamed. Cat Noir didn’t think a non-powered up person could move so fast. She zipped around everyone to go for the second tray of the oven, pulling it open and gasping sharply. She hastily grabbed an oven mitt to take them out, then put the now burnt macaroon cookies on top of the stove.

“Oh,” Sabine covered her mouth to try to halt her pity.

“Oh, honey, it’s not so bad,” Tom said quickly. “We still have plenty of macaroons in the fridge! I’ll run down and get some-”

“They won’t be the same,” she sighed dejectedly. “I made these special for A-… Cat Noir.”

Cat Noir had already eased off the chair and made his way his over. He looked at the darkened tops and edges of the pale yellow cookies, and at her heartbroken face.

“Hey, these aren’t so bad!” He assured. “And now we match! I’m sure they’ll still taste just-”

“It’s okay, Cat Noir,” she interrupted, looking up at him expectantly. “You were going to tell me you’re in love with Ladybug, right?”

He winced, looking anywhere but at her as he rubbed the back of his neck. “W-Well, I- no! I was just, uh,” then he stopped when he caught sight of her, and let his head fall. “Yeah. Sorry.”

She smiled, resigned. “It’s ok. I didn’t think you’d give up your feelings so easy for her anyway. I don’t blame you. Today was such a disaster.” She turned and walked past her father, trudging up the stairs. “I’ll be in my room if anyone needs me.”

Cat Noir had reached out to her, like he wanted to say something, but held back, letting his arms drop. Once she was gone and he heard the door close, he finally spoke up.

“I’m sorry Mr. Dupain, Mrs. Dupain-Cheng. Thanks for inviting me, and… sorry things turned out this way. Could you tell Marinette I’m really sorry?”

“Oh, Cat Noir, there’s no need to apologize so much,” Sabine finally said, walking up to him. “I know you were only trying to make her feel better.”

“Yeah, but I wound up only making her feel worse.”

“We can’t help who we love,” she said with what she hoped was a reassuring smile. “Marinette’s a strong girl, she’ll bounce back from this.”

“Yeah, she’s pretty awe- I mean, she seems pretty awesome,” he agreed.

The man cut-in. “But not ‘awesome’ enough to love, hm?” Tom accused.

“Tom!”

“I’ll, uh, get going now,” Cat Noir grimaced, heading out the door and taking his leave.

Upstairs, Marinette let herself flop face first onto her bed. Tikki spun out of her coin purse, hovering over her worriedly.

“Marinette?”

“I should’ve known it wouldn’t be that easy,” she bemoaned. “I can’t even go through a whole day without tripping at least once. But having to be saved by him twice on our date just because of my own clumsiness? AND ruining his favorite dessert the one chance I have at giving it to him? I’m a walking disaster.” She whimpered, letting her face fall into her pillow. “Now I’ll never have a chance with him...”

“Don’t say that, Marinette! There’s always next time!”

“No, Tikki, I don’t think there can be a next time. Maybe this is a sign that we’re just meant to be friends. If he saw what was behind the mask he’d just be disappointed.”

“That’s not true. You’re still-”

But her encouragement was cut short when Marinette’s room suddenly shook, and a bundle of thorned vines shot Marinette into the sky.

-

Cat Noir shuffled along the street, feeling lower than low. “I messed up.” He grumbled. Then whipped around when a giant thorned vine sprung up from the Dupain-Cheng household to shoot into the sky. “I really messed up! MARINETTE!”

[letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked]

Words On My Skin (Part 8)

Bucky Barnes x Reader Soulmate AU

A/N: Sorry this took forever! My best friend is back in town, and I’ve been busy! To compensate, I made this part looong! Though, if I look at this part any more (meaning: going back and editing), it will never get posted! So forgive me, but I refuse to edit this! XOXO

Thanks for being patient! -Kristin-

Warnings: UNEDITED, swearing, idk... 

Main Masterlist // WOMS Masterlist

 “Oh, my god! You need those shoes!” Wanda gushed, grabbing your hand and dragging you into another store at the mall in New York City, boots clunking against the tiled floors of the busy mall. She skips into some fancy shoe store, hair swinging behind her, picking up a random pair of nude pumps with a peep-toe. “You would rock these heels.”

“You’re lucky Stark pays me an obnoxious amount of money and refuses to let me pay rent.” You huffed, shifting your multiple bags up your arm, “I think I’ve spent enough money to last me a lifetime, in just this short shopping trip.”

Wanda had made good on her promise, making sure that you updated your closet with things that were more stylish and updated. She’d taken you to a few random, name brand shops, and was now pulling you through some fancy mall in New York City. Vision and Caleb were trailing behind, chatting about Vision’s new interest in cooking… though you weren’t sure if he could actually taste what he was cooking. Caleb was talking about loaning him some copies he had made of his grandmother’s cookbook.

You thought you’d be fine shopping with just Wanda, but – apparently – Bucky had thrown a goddamn temper tantrum about you shopping without security, so Vision and Caleb had joined you by the third store. You’d let it go, deciding that it wasn’t an argument you’d wanted to deal with.

Even if he was such an overprotective dumbass, sometimes.

“If you’re worried about money, I’ll buy them.” She replied, flagging down a sales associate. “Stark set me up with a card.”

“I’m not worried about money, anymore.” You smiled, shifting the bags, again, “I have more money than I know what to do with, lately.”

“Do you want me to carry your bags?” Caleb spoke up from behind you, pausing his conversation with Vision, “I don’t mind.”

“Oh, my god, that’d be lovely.” You sighed, sliding the bags off your arm and into Caleb’s outstretched hand. “Thanks, man.”

He nodded, turning back to Vision to talk about the difference between baking soda and baking powder.

Meanwhile, the sales associate brought back the appropriate size shoes for you to try on, and Wanda gave her four more pairs of shoes to grab in your size. You hadn’t even noticed her browsing through the aisles. “Wanda, how the hell are we going to carry this back to the car?”

“We can just make Vis and Caleb bring them back while we go to the girly underwear store.” She winked, holding your flats while you shoved your feet into the pumps, nodding when you tested them out. “If your closet looks the way it does, I’m sure your underwear collection is just as sparse.”

You looked down, a blush warming your cheeks, “You might be right…”

“I figured as much.” She laughed, twisting one of her many rings around her fingers. “I don’t know about you, but a good set of underwear can completely brighten your day. I feel so put-together, with a matching set.”

“I’ll take any advice on how to feel put-together,” You sighed, slipping off the heels and grabbing another box that the associate had set on the bench. “I’ve been stressed out more-so than usual, because Bucky is projecting his stress onto me, without realizing it.”

“You can feel his stress?” She asked, eyebrows shooting up in astonishment, “I didn’t know that was something that could happen with soulmates.”

“He’s been overworking himself.” You rolled your eyes, zipping up the backs of a pair of black, caged booties, “Even if we didn’t have the soulmate bond, you can see it in his eyes. They get all dark when he is stressed out.”

“You should be the one overworking him, not Avengers business.” She winked, bursting out into laughter as your eyes widened and blush spread to your neck and chest. “You should be overworking him all night long.”

“Oh my god, Wanda, stop it.” You whined, clearing your throat as your heart rate sped up at the thought of you and Bucky getting intimate. “We’re still in the early stages of our relationship.”

She gaped at you, shocked, “Have you even kissed, yet?”

Looking down in embarrassment, you shook your head, “Uh, no. Not, yet. We’ve only really ever hugged and held hands.” You cleared your throat, again, unzipping the pretty boots and putting them in the ‘yes’ pile. “I feel like a fucking teenager.”

“How the hell do you deal with the sexual tension?” She laughs, shaking her head with a large grin on her face. “You two work out, together… I’ve seen that man work out, and I don’t know how you deal with it.”

“Lots of cold showers.” You giggled, slipping on another pair of red heels, “I don’t want to overstep.”

“You’re literally soulmates.” She rolled her eyes, swiping her hair behind her ear, nodding at the heels. “You’re meant to be together.”

“Still.” You sighed, slipping off the heels and putting your flats back on. “That doesn’t mean we need to jump each other’s bones right off the bat.”

She hummed, putting on what you liked to call her ‘plotting face’. You could tell that she was plotting some sort of evil plan to try and get you and Bucky to further your relationship. She’d tried it the week previous, by talking about how she was going to take you lingerie shopping, today, and winking at Bucky. She’d, also, got the rest of the team – sans Steve – to make sexual comments when you were both together.

It was awkward as hell, but you and Bucky just decided to ignore them.

“I have an idea.” She suddenly sprung up, a large grin on her pale face, white teeth fully on display. “You’re going to go along with this idea, whether you like it or not.”

Oh god.

“You scare me.” You gulped, shoving the shoes back in the appropriate boxes so you could pay. “I’m not doing anything I’m not comfortable with.”

“It’s nothing too terrible.” She smirked, following you to the cash register. “Just a little… revamping of your work-out clothes, underwear, and giving that chest a little… oomph.”

You glanced down at your chest, a frown on your face. It wasn’t that bad, you weren’t necessarily upset about your… assets. “What’s wrong with my chest?”

“Well, the grandma bra I guarantee you’re wearing, for starters.” Wanda giggled, ignoring the weird look from the woman ringing up your shoes, “You could use an upgrade.” She leaned against the counter, crossing her arms and giving you a smug grin, “Imagine the look on Bucky’s face if you walked into the gym with a sports bra that actually gave you boobs? He’d really want to throw you down onto the mat, if you know what I mean.”

“Wanda!” You hissed, face heating up in embarrassment as you glanced around at the other women in line and the woman ringing you up, “There’s people around.”

“So?” She scoffed, waving her hand nonchalantly and rolling her eyes, “You’ve been with Bucky for like… six months. You haven’t even kissed, yet. You two are literally the definition of a slow-burn romance. It’s infuriating. I hate slow burns. What, are you courting?”

“Shut up.” You mumble, taking your bags and thanking the sales woman, “I’m throwing out all your romance novels.”

“I’ll throw you through a wall, if you do.” She raised an eyebrow at you, lips pressing into a hard line. “I can move things with my mind, remember?”

“Quit meddling with my love life.” You grumbled, following her out of the store to reconvene with Vision and Caleb. “We’re getting to know each other. We have the rest of our lives for the… intimate stuff.”

“The ‘intimate stuff’ is the best part!” Wanda whined, looping her arm through yours, “Right, boys?”

Vision frowned, face scrunching in confusion as he thought about what you were talking about, “I don’t…”

“Just say ‘yes’, Vis.” Wanda chuckled, letting you go to grab Vision’s hand, “Anyways, us ladies are going to go girly shopping. Would you boys mind giving us some privacy and bringing the bags to the car? I promise we will be fine, and I will call if there’s an issue.”

“I suppose we can do that.” Caleb replied, a small smirk on his face. “Girly shopping isn’t really my forte, anyways. I prefer the fun stuff, like fast cars and food.”

“Such a manly man.” You rolled your eyes, lips turning up into a small smile, “Coming from the man who literally yelled at me for not knowing the difference between sorbet and sherbet.”

“I’m a food connoisseur.” Caleb laughed, lips stretched over his straight teeth as he juggled your bags onto one arm, so he could run his hand through his spiked up, dark brown hair. “You know the difference, now, don’t you?”

“Only after you sat me down and made me watch an entire video about how each of them are made differently.” You snorted, pulling at your sleeves as you noticed some civilians trying to slyly take pictures of your little group. “Anyways, we should get going. I want to be back to the compound by five, so I can finish my paperwork.”

“Shoot me a text when you’re done, and we’ll meet you.” Caleb nodded, stepping closer to Vision, “I’ll go show Vision around some kitchen stuff, so he can learn more about cooking.”

“Go nuts.” You waved, looping your arm through Wanda’s so you could follow her along towards the women’s underwear store. You stayed close to her, taking note of all the civilians who seemed to recognize the Avenger, and the soulmate of The Winter Soldier. “So, where did Vision find this newfound love for cooking?”

“He said he wanted to be able to make my favorite dishes, to lift my spirits.” She smiled, eyes lighting up, “Though, he can’t actually taste the food… nor does he eat.”

“It’s the thought that counts.”

When you arrived at the fancy pink and black themed store, you were immediately overwhelmed with lace and silk. There were so many different options, and you had no idea where to even start. There was lingerie, different types of underwear, all types and sizes of bras, robes, pajamas, garter belts, shapewear, and anything else that went under your clothes. There was even an attached subsidiary store for the younger women, which sold the work-out gear that Wanda was mentioning, previously.

“What size are you?” Wanda broke off from you, browsing the racks. “You look like you’re about to have an anxiety attack, just let me handle this.”

You repeated your size, fingers gliding over the silk material of the nearest robe, which was a pale, blush pink with large pockets and lace trim. “I like this.”

“So, buy it.” Wanda replied, hand already full of hangars and undergarments, “We’ll start with bras and lingerie, then move onto work-out clothes and underwear.”

“Do I have to buy lingerie?” You whined, grabbing the hanger with the robe and moving on to a silky nightgown that matched it. “I don’t think I really have any use for it…”

“Yet.” Wanda sung, branching away from you and filling her arms with more items.

--------------------

Bucky: How’s shopping?

You grinned, waiting in the dressing room for Wanda to return with a different size babydoll piece that she claimed was a must-have. Though, everything you’d tried on that fit was apparently a ‘must-have’.

You: Pretty sure I’m lucky Stark doesn’t charge me rent. The dent in my bank account is pretty sizeable. How was your meeting?

Bucky: …do I have to keep going?

You: Yes. It’s part of your deal with the U.S Government.

You: I have no idea where the heck I’m going to put all of these clothes…

Bucky: Just make Wanda organize your closet. She did this crap to all of us. You’re her newest victim. Though, she’s nicer to you and Nat about it, than she was with us. She bullied me the whole time.

You: You’re three times her size you big baby.

Bucky: She’s thrown me through a wall. I choose my battles, now. I just let it happen.

Bucky: We’ve got a three hour slot for the gun range tomorrow, by the way.

You grimaced, as a knock on the dressing room door sounded through the small room.

“I got it.” Wanda called, as you got up and unlocked the door. “I, also, started a small check-out pile for you, so just give me the ‘yes’ pile, so I can go give it to the sales ladies.”

You grabbed the hangers, rolling your eyes as you traded, “Small, my ass.”

“Your ass isn’t small.” She grinned, sending you a wink, “Bucky’s a lucky man.”

“Shut up.” You chuckled, shutting the door on her. You sat back down, quickly typing your reply.

You: UGH. Fine. I’m going to complain, though.

Bucky: I expected nothing less, darlin.

You: Just for that, you don’t get to see anything I bought.

You realized just how dirty that sounded, right after you clicked send.

Oh god, this is how people start sexting conversations…

Oh Jesus Christ, what have you done?!

Your heart leapt from your chest as your phone buzzed in your hand, his reply popping up quickly.

Bucky: Oh? What might that be, darlin?

Say something snarky!

You: That’s for Wanda and I to know, and you to never find out.

Bucky: Wanda’s a lucky woman.

“Did you try it on, yet?” Wanda called, scaring you into dropping your phone and swearing quietly. “I want to see it.”

“Hold on!” You called back, quickly switching the top and trying to contort your arms, so you could close the clasps on the bra part of the outfit. “Okay!”

When you opened the door, letting Wanda slip in, she raised an eyebrow at your flushed appearance. “What’s up with you? Why are you all blushing?”

“I was… texting Bucky.” You admitted, adjusting the strap and looking away from her prying gaze. “I think it turned into something dirty.”

“Let me see!” She squealed, snatching your phone from your hand and glancing over the texts. “Oh my god, you’re flirting with him.”

“I flirt with him, all the time.” You grumbled, sitting down on the small, plush bench. “It’s never been this… inappropriate, before.”

“Wow… this isn’t even inappropriate.” She snorted, rolling her eyes and handing you the phone. “You should send him a picture of what you’re wearing.”

“NO!” You shrieked, hands covering your face. “I’m not ready for that, yet!”

“Fine…” She sighed, putting the items in the ‘no’ pile back on the hangers. “At least take a picture of the bag, so he knows what store you were just at.”

“That… isn’t too bad.” You bit your lip for a moment, willing your cheeks to stop flaming up and removing your hands from your hot face. “This is just… still so new.”

“You’ve had boyfriends before, right?” She asked, gathering all of the hangers of the outfits that didn’t fit. “That guy at the club was your ex, right?”

You groaned, rolling your eyes, “Unfortunately, my exes are all just like him. Self-centered, entitled jackasses.” You shook your head, remembering the faces of the boys your mother forced you to date. “I’ve dated 6 guys in my life, and Jack was the longest… and the last, before Bucky. We dated for a year, until I was eighteen.” You stood up, turning around to remove the lingerie and put your regular clothes back on. “My mother wanted me to date the types of boys who would further her connections as a lawyer. Rich people are always needing a lawyer.”

“Then,” You continued, pulling your shirt back on, “when I broke up with Jack for cheating on me, that’s when I decided that I was going to do what I wanted with my life. I told her I wasn’t going to college to be a lawyer, I got kicked out, and I decided to leave the state to get away from her. We were living in California, at the time, so I moved to Florida to go to college. I didn’t see her until the day I graduated, when she flew all the way to Florida to tell me how much she was disappointed in me…”

You swallowed thickly, willing the negative feelings to leave your body. “I left Florida, following my boss to Rhode Island, and continuing to be a Personal Assistant. She passed away four weeks before I got the job here.”

“I heard about that.” Wanda leaned against the wall, face soft with sympathy, “Pepper and Rhodey where talking about it a few days before you started. Pepper was excited to have someone who studied mental health and have assistant experience. She said she took a chance and was excited when she met you in the interviewing process.”

“Well, I have a lot of reasons to be an advocate for positive mental health.” You lifted your lips a little, meeting her eyes, “After all the shit I went through, in my life, if I could make one person feel like they matter enough to better themselves and have a positive outlook in the world… that’s a win in my book. It’s the reason I chose mental health. I learned so much in my time in therapy, that I wanted to be able to do the same for other people.”

Wanda was silent, eyebrows furrowed together, teeth pressing against her lower lip and chewing on it as she took in your words. After a few moments, her eyes looked a little misty, as she quickly cleared her throat. “You… remind me of someone. Someone who – after all the shit he went through – tried his hardest to help people.” She twisted one of the rings on her thumb, running a finger over the smooth metal, “I think that’s another reason why I like you so much. You remind me of him. He was too good for this world. So are you.”

With that, she quickly darted from the dressing room, muttering about putting the items on the return rack and needing a bottle of perfume.

You picked up your phone, biting your lip as you stared at the picture of you and Bucky from the sushi restaurant that was your background and lock screen. Your heart hurt. It hurt for Wanda, and the person that she was talking about. You didn’t know all the details about her past, but you did know that she had a brother who died. That had to be who she was talking about…

Your phone buzzed in your hand, and a little notification popped up from your old college friend, Farida. She’d replied back to your picture of a scarf you bought her from some fancy name brand store and called you insane for spending that much money on her. Her quirky little text brought a smile to your face, making you instantly feel better.

You quickly replied that you wanted to see her and her husband soon, since they’d moved with their new baby to the New York area, pretty recently.

Another text came in, from Bucky.

Bucky: What’s up? You went a little dark for a second, there. I could feel you from here. Are you okay?

You smiled at his concern, typing out a small reply of being okay, and that you were coming back, soon.

“Y/n, are you ready?” Wanda called into the dressing room, lightly knocking on the door, “The boys want to get back, and I think we’ve bought enough to start your closet.”

“To start my closet?” You scoffed, exiting the little room with the rest of your ‘yes’ pile. “I’m pretty sure you’re going to have to organize all of this for me, so I know where the hell to put it all.”

“I would love to.” She grinned, grabbing your hand and dragging you to the cash register. “I did that for everyone else who has no knowledge in fashion. Who do you think made Bucky buy the leather jacket he likes so much?”

“He does look good in that leather jacket.” You mumbled, sliding your card through the reader. Ignoring the fact that you just bought enough stuff that there was a goddamn comma in the total price and multiple bags of undergarments and work-out gear. “I can’t wait to see Bucky’s eyes bulge from his head at the new leggings.”

“That won’t be the only thing bulging.”

“Wanda!” You squealed, slapping a hand over your face. “I’m seriously burning all your romance novels!”

“Your reactions are just too good to stop!” She laughed, pulling you out the door. “Besides, you’ve been together long enough to start saying naughty things.”

“I don’t actually know if he considers us together.” You mumbled, removing your hand from your face with a small sigh. “I know we tell people we’re soulmates, and the world knows from the TMZ article… but we’ve never actually established any of that stuff.”

She frowned, rolling her eyes in exasperation, “You both act like you’re in a relationship, why not stick a label on it?”

“I don’t know… I don’t exactly see myself with anyone else.” You followed her out of the store, glancing around for Vision and Caleb – not spotting the dark haired man and the android, anywhere. “We just haven’t…”

“DTR? ‘Defined the relationship’?” Wanda supplied, a small smile spreading on her face. “I’ve been watching American reality TV. I’ve been learning the slang.”

“Ew. Watch something that’s actually worth watching… I’ll show you Netflix.” You laughed, as you sat down on the bench to wait for the guys. The mall was starting to get busy, people husting through the crowded halls of the giant building. You watched as a young mother pushed her toddler along in a stroller, her partner walking alongside of her as they made their way into the baby store a few shops down. “This soulmate shit’s weird.”

“I wouldn’t know.” She shrugged, eyes flitting down to your exposed tattoo on your wrist. There was no reason to hide it, anymore, when everyone knew whose soulmate you were. “I don’t have a soulmate.” Her eyes glossed over, lost in a memory that you couldn’t see. “My… my brother had a soulmate, though. He never got to meet her. The poor soul is without him, suffering, and there’s nothing I can do to help them.”

“It happened to my grandma.” You held her hand, which was surrounded in a twisting, red light. “It was the hardest thing she’d ever had to live with… but she managed to live her life. There is always hope.”

“I hope so.” She sighed, realizing that her powers were starting to show in public, and reigning them back in. “At least that’s one less thing I have to worry about in my life. Though… it’d be nice to know that someone is destined to love me… like in the books.”

“Someone does love you.” You smiled, catching sight of the boys, who were leisurely walking down the crowded path. Vision, though wearing civilian clothes, was catching the eyes of everyone around. “Just because you don’t have the tattoo, doesn’t mean that someone isn’t destined to love you.”

She followed your line of sight, cheeks flushing red at the sight of Vision walking with Caleb. “You might be right.”

“I know I am.” You pulled her up, thankful that Caleb had brought your bags to the car. “Now, lets head home. I have to mentally prepare to shoot guns, tomorrow.”

“It’s not that bad.” Caleb snorts, grabbing your bags from your hand and glancing around the shops – as someone with training always does. “Squeeze. Don’t pull. It’s fairly simple.”

“Speak for yourself.”

Part 9

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[maevefiction]

Your Light in the Mist - Chapter 11

More than a week had elapsed since my last yoga session, and I was pleasantly surprised at my lack of stiffness. My iPod sat silent in the grass next to my mat…the sound of the waves crashing against the rocks proved to be the only music I required. Especially at six in the morning. The sun had just begun to rise behind us, its warmth exacerbating the flush my workout normally provided.

Simon’s skill level was far, far above mine, and some of the poses he worked through made me stop dead in my tracks as I admired the way his body seemed to defy the very laws of physics. He volunteered to work with me whenever we had the time, and I gratefully accepted, though I fully understood that a grace such as his was something that couldn’t be taught.

We chatted while cooling down, learning that our birthdays were only a day apart, his on October 30th, mine on October 31st. He found my being a Halloween baby hilarious, and I was tickled that we shared the same astrological sign. Fellow Scorpios - no wonder he’d liked my tank top. I tried to get him to reveal his birth year, but he adamantly refused until I offered mine up first. The look of delight on his face as he screeched out ‘me too!’ was adorable, and when he high-fived me and christened me his sister from another mister I embraced him and kissed his cheek, grinning at the lovely blush it caused.

I took a seat at the patio table and opened my laptop with the intention of starting work on Tom’s website design. Simon sat next to me, both of us facing the ocean, and he began typing away on his phone. He harrumphed and gave me some wicked side eye.

My brow furrowed. “For fuck’s sake, what NOW?”

He showed me his screen, scrolling through his inbox. “Seven more since last night. You’ve made an awful lot of extra work for me, woman.” I rolled my eyes. He turned on his chair to face me. “I’m curious, though…I thought you just lectured to and consulted with PR firms, which would mean their actual clients wouldn’t know much about you at all. So, it’s kinda surprising that an artist would be willing to jump ship and leave their current rep in the dust to wind up where you are, wouldn’t you say?”

I sighed and finished editing my open layer in Photoshop before replying. “I started out working directly with clients. My first was Anne Rice. She’s is a family friend and was willing to give me a cha…”

He put a hand on my shoulder and shoved. “GET. OUT. I’m assuming this means you’re from or lived in New Orleans at some point? But it mustn’t have been for long, because you have zero accent.”

“Your assumption is correct. Born there, raised there, relocated to New York City in 1998.”

He nodded emphatically. “So you dumped the accent. Understandable.”

It was my turn for side eye. “I didn’t dump it. It just…faded.”

He snorted. “Whatever you say, Maude.”

I pinched his arm, reveling in the resulting squeal he emitted. “Faded. I’m like a chameleon with accents. Soon I’ll be picking up your dialect and sounding like a pretentious asshat, too. In which case, you have my permission to kill me.”

“You can call me anything you like as long as you solemnly swear to take me to Mardi Gras next year.”

I rolled my eyes and held up my hand, palm towards him. “Simon. Please. I don’t think you’re ready for that sort of thing. But, if you start training now, we might be able to pull it off.”

He tilted his head like an oversized puppy. “Training for what? Drinking heavily? I’ve been training for that for years.”

“No. Throwing beads into the crowd. And doing the princess wave.” I demonstrated both. “Because if we go, you must ride on a parade float. It can be arranged. I know people.” I frowned. “At least, I used to know people. Anyway, what I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted was that she was my first client, and it gave me a lot of clout. For which I am eternally grateful. I moved on after three years or so with her and began working directly with clients, most of whom were too small to have a decent PR firm behind them. I did everything, created websites, set up Facebook accounts, provided instructions on how to post, when to post, what to post, yada yada. Lots of hand holding and cajoling. Word spread, and bigger names took notice, which led to PR firms hiring me to work one-on-one with their clients for a specified duration. Most of them already had websites in place, so my focus shifted entirely to social media. In early 2010, I was invited to speak for two hours at a PR conference in San Diego…they wanted me to lecture on enhancing client reputation through social media. It was winter in New York, and they were willing to pay for my travel expenses so I thought, California? Fuck it, why not?”

Simon’s legs were crossed, his upper body leaning in towards me as he listened attentively. I had paused, and he motioned for me to continue.

“So, I spoke for two hours and they handed me a check for three thousand dollars. That was more than I normally made in an entire week and it blew my tiny little mind.  It seemed to be vastly less stressful than dealing with super huge egos and non-tech savvy artists and damn, the money. I adjusted my entire business model, and within a month I was turning down engagements because my calendar was full. PR firms were still asking me for assistance, so I set up a consulting procedure wherein I’d outline a plan for them to implement, collected my fee and was on my way. It was all so…easy.”

He laughed loudly. “And you decided to work for Prosper why?”

“Because my ‘easy’ job and the cash it generated had taken over my entire life. I was the job and the job was me. Much to my surprise, lecturing and consulting long term turned out to be a soul sucking bore…and it transformed me into a miserable drudge. I am, at heart, a creative individual and I missed doing graphic and website design, photography, and learning new things. Terribly. Working for Prosper allows me to do all that again, and then some. That’s why.”

He leaned back in his chair and rubbed his chin with one hand. “And I’m sure it has nothing to do with the exquisite creature sleeping soundly in your bed right now.”

“No, it doesn’t. He was actually the reason why I seriously considered declining Luke’s offer.” Simon looked puzzled, but I didn’t elaborate. “So. Why did you leave such a prestigious position at the Dorchester to become a PA? Just for Luke? Or is there more to the story?”

He grinned. “Damn, turned it right around on me, didn’t you? Touché, my friend. I went to university for business management and administrative assistance, and worked in the field until 2005. Cooking had always been my passion, and I had some sort of spiritual awakening wherein I decided I absolutely needed to become a professional chef or else I would shrivel up and die. So I did. I moved from place to place, learning, working, partying my ass off, and finally landed the sous chef spot at the Dorchester in 2009. It was dandy at first, but as the years passed I felt like I’d grown stagnant, doing the same thing night after night, having little input on menu changes and so on. Like you, I was bored. I was averaging 70 hours a week in that kitchen, cut off from the world, and it hit me that all I had gotten out of it was a nicely padded bank account…and that there was no one to share it with. I’d always loved being around lots of people, and there I was seeing nothing but the same damn faces day in and day out. In 2013 I happened across Luke’s ad, reworked my resume, and the rest is history. Unlike you, though, I don’t think I would have taken the job if it wasn’t for him, because the salary was abysmal. As soon as I saw him, I knew. He was it. The one. Love at first sight. I thank my lucky stars every single day that he felt the same way.”

After wiping the tears from his eyes, he took hold of my hand. “Maude, I don’t know if he’s mentioned it or not, but Tom’s had a rough time of it lately, and I’m so, so happy that you’ve found each other.”

“Me too, Simon.” I smiled, letting go of his hand. “Now, please, for the love of all things holy, shut your cake hole so I can get some work done, okay?”

“God, you are such a bitch.”

“I am. And you’re still talking. Cease.”

We worked quietly, side by side, until Luke poked his head out the doors to inquire as to when Simon planned on getting his butt in the kitchen and making some breakfast. As he got up from his chair, he peered over my shoulder at my laptop screen. I had a basic layout set and was in the process of choosing a color combination that would contrast perfectly.

“Wow, that’s a right brilliant color palette you have there, Maude. Is that for Tom’s site?”  

I nodded. “Does it look…familiar?”

He stared. “Yes…maybe…should it?”

I opened the tab that contained the HD photo of Tom’s eye that I’d drawn all my color options from. “Tada.”

Simon poked my shoulder and called for Luke to come see. He padded out onto the lanai, looked over my shoulder, nodded, then put his hands on his hips.

“So, when are you going to use your magic to revamp the Prosper site?”

I closed my laptop and put my head in my hands, then pushed my chair back and went to wait in the kitchen, muttering to myself about peace and solitude and how I couldn’t find any even though I was in paradise.

Tom bounded our of our bedroom just as Simon was plating our pancakes and bacon, freshly showered, wearing a pair of faded, loose fitting jeans and a tight, light blue V-neck tee. I leaned back on my bar stool and around the counter to look at his feet. Scuffed, well-worn boots. When my eyes finally made their way up to his face I was greeted with a dazzling, toothy smile. I groaned.

Simon pinched his cheeks. “Lovely of you to join us, Thomas.”

Tom lowered himself elegantly onto the stool to my right, resting his hand on my spandex-clad thigh as he leaned in to kiss me.

“Good morning, Maude. How was yoga?”

“Spectacular, actually. Simon and I had a lovely chat and I even managed to get some work done in spite of it.” He laughed and began slowly sliding his hand up my leg, edging ever closer to the apex of my thighs. Simon set our plates in front of us, raising a brow as he spied what Tom was up to.

“Um, excuse me. This is a fine dining establishment, people. No foreplay is permitted.” I glanced up from my plate and saw Luke directly behind him, hand cupping Simon’s ass.

“Whatever, asshole.” I pointed at my short stack. “Do you have syrup for these?”

He pulled a pot off the stove and spooned some of its contents onto them. “Made with fresh pineapples. Especially for you.”

All eyes were on me as they waited for a reaction. I broke off a hunk of pancake with my fork and shoved it in my mouth. “Mmm, yummy. Thank you.” Luke looked at Tom, who shrugged. I took another bite of breakfast. “Yeah, nice try, losers. I happen to like pineapples. Just not on pizza.”

Tom put his arm around my waist, pulled me to him and kissed the top of my head. “I had nothing to do with this. I swear it.”

I said nothing, ripping off a piece of bacon with my teeth instead. He tapped his fork on his plate.

“So, Maude, I was thinking…maybe we could take a ride out to Talk Story today? I called to see if Alani would be in, and she is.” I spun the stool around in his direction, dumbfounded. He smiled. “I did say I’d go back to meet her, did I not?”

“Yes. Yes you did.” I grabbed his hand and squeezed it. “What an amazingly generous thing to do. Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me just yet. You’re going to be the one in charge of crowd control.” He stole a strip of bacon from my plate and swallowed it down before I could even muster a protest.

“I’d rather corral a group of a hundred people than have to sit next to you while I’m trying to eat a fucking meal, bacon stealer. And everything else stealer.”

He snickered, and I wolfed down the rest of my food, rinsed my dishes, put them in the dishwasher and headed for the bedroom, finally noticing that Luke and Simon had disappeared. I wrote a giant ‘thanks for breakfast’ on the chalkboard in the kitchen and drew a smiley face to go with it, figuring we wouldn’t be seeing them again before we left.

*************************************** After my much needed shower, I wound up standing in my underwear, staring into yet another wardrobe wondering what the hell to wear. Tom looked too damn good for me to get away with shorts and a T-shirt, and my black tank dress just didn’t scream ‘please behave and listen to the nice lady’. Tom was waiting patiently for me, sitting at the desk answering emails and returning calls. I looked at his boots, then back and my limited selection of dresses. The brown chiffon galaxy print sleeveless wasn’t an exact match, but pretty damn close. I pulled it off its hanger and laid it on the bed so I could unzip the back without it winding up on the floor, chastising myself for giving in to my everything-must-coordinate OCD once again. I slipped it over my head, put my arms through the proper holes and managed to zip it up on my own, then went into the bathroom to figure out a hair strategy.

I’d just wrestled it into a braid when I overheard Tom talking in the bedroom.

“How’s Los Angeles? Elsa? Kids? Good to hear. Oh, she’s unbelievable, Chris. Here, I’ll take you in and you can meet her.” He came around the corner carrying his open laptop.

“Chris Hemsworth, Maude Gallagher.” He turned the screen toward me, and there he was, Thor, God of Thunder. In my bathroom. He held up a hand in greeting.

“Hello, Maude. Nice to meet you. See you? Skype you?” He face palmed. “I have no idea what the correct terminology is.” I heard a woman yell in the background that meet was fine and for him to bring the tablet over to her so she could see me. He got up and walked into another room, and a beautiful blonde woman came into view alongside Chris. She waved madly.

“Look at you, you’re gorgeous. A natural beauty. And that dress…I am in love with it. You must tell me where you found it.” Her accent was a delight. She grinned. “I’m Elsa, by the way. Tom has told us so much about you I feel like I know you already.”

I waved at them. “Hi there. Lovely to meet you both. I’d like to say Tom has told me so much about you, but that would be a big fat lie, so suffice to say I’m sure he will tell me so much about you when we aren’t quite so…so…shit, what’s the word I’m looking for here?”

Tom moved to stand next to me, shifting the laptop so we were both visible, smirking. “Preoccupied. The word you’re looking for is preoccupied.”

They laughed, and Chris grabbed at Elsa. “Remember when we were always preoccupied?”

She slapped his hand. “Oh yes. I do.  And that’s why now we’re preoccupied with three little ones, my darling Christopher.” I heard children crying in the background. Elsa said a quick goodbye and ran off, and Chris followed suit so he could assist.

Tom put the laptop on the counter and pulled me to him, hands on my ass as he pressed me up against his crotch and rammed his tongue in my mouth, then backed away quickly, leaving me panting. “Well, I guess we should get going.”

I shot him a scathing look. “We should. But I have to pee first.” He walked out into the bedroom. As I sat on the toilet, I weighed my options for getting even. I mentally high fived myself as I pulled my underwear off over my feet and left them on the bathroom floor.

*************************************** We parked a block down from Talk Story, and I scouted ahead and left Tom in the Jeep. My gladiator sandals clicked on the sidewalk as I half-jogged to my destination, anxious to see if Alani was at the desk. She was, and I texted him to come on down. He ran to meet me, and I stopped him from holding the door for me and letting me go in first.

“Nope, you should be the first thing she sees.” I had my phone all ready to go in order to capture the moment, planning on sending her a copy as a keepsake. He walked through, and she looked up as the bell dinged to announce that someone had entered the store and the look on her face was one I knew I’d remember forever. He approached her, hand extended, and I was right behind him.

“Hello, Alani. I’m Tom.” She remained motionless. He turned to me. “This is Maude. We were here on Monday, and she told me that you’re a fan of my work and would perhaps enjoy meeting me.” She nodded, gingerly lifting her arm up but unable to make herself grab his hand. He took the initiative, holding it to his lips and kissing it demurely. She squealed, so high pitched I thought my ears might bleed. Four other girls came running out of the stacks, took one look at him, and began jumping up and down, screaming, phones in hand. I stopped filming so I could set the boundaries before any issues arose, stepping between them and Tom.

“Hi, ladies. I’m Maude, Tom’s social media manager. Let’s go over some ground rules, okay?” They lowered their phones and nodded. “Tom wants to be able to take pictures, sign for and chat with all of you, but in order for him to be able to do so you need to make sure you don’t post anything to social media until after we leave the premises. No texting or calling, either. If a crowd turns up, we’ll have to cut things short, and where’s the fun in that?”  

A husky, bearded, bespectacled man came out from the stacks, wearing a white and green palm leaf print Hawaiian shirt and khaki hiking shorts. “Girls, what the heck is going on up here? Why all the screaming? You know people prefer quiet when they…” He stopped short when he saw Tom, his mouth dropping open, then quickly closing as he grew closer, hand proffered. I figured he was the owner, so I let him pass.

“Aloha, Mr. Hiddleston. I’m Roger Marshal, and Talk Story is my baby. I can’t begin to tell you how much I appreciate your stopping by again…the girls were so bummed when they learned they’d missed you on Monday.”

Tom shook his hand vigorously. “Thank you for having me. Your establishment is outstanding…I’m a bit of a bibliophile, and if I had my druthers I’d be perusing the shelves here for days on end. My apologies for dashing off so quickly when I was in last, but I had a prior obligation and thought it better to come back when I had more time to spend.” He turned to me. “This is Maude Gallagher, my social media manager.”

I offered my hand and he clasped it gently with one of his, then placed the other on top. “Maude, nice to meet you. Is there anything I can do to make this easier for you both?”

“Actually, would you happen to have a room available that’s a bit more private?”

He nodded, then turned his attention to the desk. “Sure thing. Alani, why don’t you show our guests to the staff lunch room?” Her eyes lit up, and the faces of the rest of the staff fell. “Girls, you go too. I’ll cover the desk.” They thanked him in unison between excited giggles.

I tried to hang back behind Tom, but he slowed and fell into step with me and slipped his arm around me, hand on my lower back, whispering in my ear. “The way you jumped in and took charge did…things…to me, Maude.” His let his hand glide lower and lower, halting when he reached the spot where the waistband of my underwear should be. He felt around with his fingers, over my hip, diving quickly down into the crease of my left buttock then back up to my waist, gripping me just a smidge too hard.

I met his gaze, noting his narrowed eyes and the way his tongue darted out over and over to lick his lips. I smirked and whispered back. “Gosh, I’m sorry. I forgot to mention that I’m not wearing any panties. They sorta fell off back at the house and are lying on the bathroom floor, all alone and unloved.” The hand on my waist began to shake as we reached the staff room and he began breathing deeply as he attempted to keep his shit together. And round two of Friday’s Titillation Tease goes to…me.

Tom spent nearly two hours taking selfies, videos, signing anything the girls could get their hands on, and answering their seemingly unlimited supply of questions. The giant cup of tea I’d had on the ride over had finally hit my bladder, and I excused myself and went off in search of the bathrooms. There was only a one, unisex, located all the way on the other side of the store, tucked into an alcove deep in the stacks. Nice and roomy, too. I envisioned Tom fucking me up against the wall, then scolded myself for my blatant lack of restraint as I texted him precisely what I’d been thinking while I walked back to the staff room.

Roger had come back to check on them, which Tom took as an indicator that it was time to wrap things up. He was hugging each of the girls goodbye in turn as they left the room, saving Alaini for last. She rested her head on his chest, facing me, and mouthed ‘he smells like a FOREST’ while hugging him tightly. Up until that moment, I hadn’t been sure whether she recognized me or not. She stepped back and looked at both of us.

“This has been, like, the best day of my life. I can never thank you enough.” Her eyes shone with tears. “Would it be okay if I took a picture of you guys together?”

I smiled. “Of course. But I think it would be better if you were in it, too.” We posed, and Tom held out her phone to get the shot. I was entering my Prosper email address into her phone so she could send me a copy and she was putting hers in mine so I could send her the video from earlier when she cleared her throat.

She looked up shyly. “Um, I don’t mean to be rude or get in your business or anything, but I was just, you know, wondering…” She swallowed. “Are you guys, like, a couple?”

Tom grinned. “Is it that obvious?”

Her brow furrowed. “Well, you know, I saw what you posted on Twitter yesterday and I was like, hmm, and I know you guys work together and now seeing you in person…yeah. It’s pretty obvious, I guess.”

Tom took my hand. “Yes, Alani. Maude isn’t just my social media manager…she’s my girlfriend as well. And can I let you in on a little secret?” She nodded, awestruck. “When you saw us here on Monday, that was the very first time we met. So you played a rather important role in what turned out to be the best day of my life so far.”

I kissed his cheek. “Mine too, Alani.”

Alani flopped onto the nearest chair, clutching her hands to her chest. “That. Is. So. Romantic.” She leapt back up and hugged me. “We all want him for ourselves, but if he has to be with someone else, I’m really glad it’s you.”  

I patted her on the back. “Thank you. Hearing you say that means so much…honestly, I don’t have the words to express properly how it made me feel.” We let go of each other, and she made her way back to the desk.

I turned to Tom. “I need to hit the bathroom again before we head out.” He nodded and followed my lead. He didn’t mention my text, and I assumed he hadn’t read it yet. We didn’t see another soul on the way there, and the stacks outside the alcove were deserted as well. I recalled my vision of Tom fucking me against the bathroom wall and decided this was going to be my shining moment of public indecency. I opened the door, stepped in, then turned around to face him, left eyebrow raised.

“Want to join me?” I licked my lips. He barged past me into the bathroom, fingers already working to unbuckle his belt.

“I thought you’d never ask.” I locked the door, then did a 180. He held his fully engorged cock in his right hand, stroking it, catching any drips with his left. “I do believe I need to put this somewhere immediately so I don’t make a terrible mess on the floor.”

I bit my bottom lip as I tilted my head to the side. “I think I’ve got just the place for it.”

He ceased his stroking in order to back me up against the wall, growling in my ear. “Oh yes. You most certainly do.” He bent his knees as he lifted the front of my dress up to my waist, and I wrapped my leg around his, grinding my dripping pussy against him while I rubbed my clit. He groaned, and I slipped my glistening finger into his mouth. He sucked on it, and I felt the head of his cock at my entrance and his hands cupping my ass, his full weight on me, pressing me firmly against the cool tile.

He was panting. “Put your other leg around me and your arms around my neck.” I did the latter, but scoffed at the former.

“Um, there is no way in hell you’re going to be able to hold me up.”

He leaned forward to stare into my eyes, and his expression made me whimper. “Leg. Up. Now. Please.” As I complied he sheathed himself fully. I tried to bite back a ridiculously loud moan but was only partially successful. His mouth met mine, tongues dancing around each other. He pulled back.

“Maude, my apologies, but once I start moving I fear I’m going to last all of thirty seconds. If I’m fortunate.”

I clamped down on him. He began thrusting wildly, and I focused all my energy on not coming before he did. I was doing well until he started whispering in my ear using his Loki voice.

“Give in, mortal. Come for me. I know you’ve dreamed of this, me fucking into you for all I’m worth, you pinned against the wall, unable to sway those mesmerizing hips and have your way with me as you ride my cock to find your own selfish pleasure.”

He pounded into me, almost savagely, and as he felt my walls begin to flutter he put his hand over my mouth.

“Not. A. Sound.” I came, my scream trapped beneath his hand, the wet sounds of him moving in and out of me echoing eerily off the bathroom walls. “That’s it. Look at you, coming and coming all over my cock. So, so beautiful.”

He let his hand drop, and I could feel his thrusts becoming more erratic as I stared at him, his face red, jaw clenched, the veins on his neck standing out with his exertion. His head tipped back, fingers digging into the underside of my thighs, and his entire body shuddered as he orgasmed, come spurting hot inside me. I let my legs slide down one at a time, planting my feet as firmly as I possibly could despite the fact that they felt like they were made of Jell-O.  

He rested his head on my shoulder, and I rubbed his back. “I guess this means you got my text after all.” I felt him nod. “Well, if this is what not wearing underwear gets me, I’m never putting on another fucking pair ever again.”

We both laughed, quickly cleaned ourselves up, and I peeked out the door to make sure the coast was clear. Still not a soul around, and we said a final goodbye to Alani on our way out and proceeded to walk back to the Jeep. We sat for a while, neither of us feeling quite capable of driving.

He leaned over to kiss me, hand on the back of my neck, grinning as he pulled away. “I’m famished. Want to grab something to eat before we head back?”

“You already know the answer to that.” I noticed the street getting a bit congested, a small pack of women heading in our direction and what appeared to be a local news crew up the road a bit…I pulled out my phone and checked Alani’s Twitter feed. She’d posted the photo of all of us.

Here’s me just a little while ago with Tom Hiddleston and his girlfriend, Maude. He smells like a pine forest, and she’s super nice. #bestdayever, #thankyoutomandmaude

I showed it to him. “I’m thinking maybe we should stop somewhere a little further down the road. You?”

He started the Jeep, put it in first and stalled it as he tried to pull away from the curb, and then again on his second try. He smiled at me sheepishly. “Perhaps you’d better drive.”

“Gee, ya think?” We got out and switched places. I shook my head. “What a newb.”

He crossed his arms. “I am not a newb. I’m just out of practice is all.”

I patted his thigh as we got to the highway. “Right. Rusty stick skills. I remember.”

He chortled. “Yours remain top notch though, my love.”

I smiled smugly. “They do, don’t they?”

He raised his index finger. “Although, technically, you didn’t actually make use of them this go round, did you?”

“I’ll make up for it next time.”

“I’m going to hold you to that.”

“Well I’d fucking hope you’d hold me to it. That’s the whole point.” I saw a McDonald’s sign in the distance. “Dude, I want some French fries in the WORST way. And a chocolate milkshake. You game?’

“I most certainly am.”

“If you behave I’ll let you have my cherry.”

“Bit late for that, isn’t it?”

“How rude.”

“Perhaps. But true.”

“Not entirely true.”

“What do you mean, not entirely true?”

I turned off the highway and into the parking lot. The drive through line was mobbed, but the lot itself was relatively empty. “I mean that the fact that it’s a bit late for you to have my cherry is only partially correct.”

He stared at me as I engaged the parking brake, puzzled, then shook his head. “I’m not following.”

The left corner of my mouth scrunched up in mock irritation. “Really? Are you sure?” He shrugged, palms up. “Think about all we’ve…done.”

“Maude.”

“Good. Now think about what we haven’t done.” I gave him a few moments to review, watching his face closely so I’d see it dawn on him. 3…2…1…aaaannndd there it was. His jaw slackened, hips lifting almost imperceptibly. “That’s right. I’ve played around, sure, but as far as actually having a cock in my ass…nope. Which means, technically, my anal cherry is still intact.”

He covered his face with his hands, groaning, but said nothing.

I went in for the kill. “So, Thomas…tell me. Would you like my cherry?”

Shaking his head, face still hidden, he spoke in a low voice. “Maude.” He paused, remaining silent for quite some time, seemingly avoiding my question. I wondered if I’d overstepped some sort of boundary, pushing him too far.

My mind was racing, and I frowned. “Wow.  I’m really sorry, Tom.”

He uncovered his face to take my hand, gazing at me with eyes full of concern. “Whatever for?”

“Because I put you on the spot there and just assumed it’s something you’d want to participate in. I didn’t stop to think that it’s something that might not be up everyone’s alley.” I rolled my eyes. “That didn’t come out…shit…DAMN. Anyway, that was incredibly presumptuous and I apologize for letting myself get so carried away. Please don’t feel like it’s something you have to…”

He leaned in to kiss me forcefully, covering my entire mouth with his, tongue darting over my lips, then pulled away before I could fully engage. “May I answer your question now?”

I shook my head. “Tom, you don’t need…”

“I know I don’t need to, but I WANT to. My answer is, with undeniable certainty, yes. Please accept my apology for not answering straight away. I’m afraid I was too busy thinking about how deliciously tight you’re going to feel around me and then I remembered that you aren’t wearing panties and it was all I could do to stop myself from dragging you onto my lap and fucking you right here in the McDonald’s parking lot.”

His eyes met mine, nostrils flaring, pupils blown wide open. Never before had I been able to do this to a man, make him want me so desperately using nothing but words. He squeezed my hand.

“That you’d trust me with something so intimate, bequeathing me such a precious gift, wishing to share something that you’ve not yet experienced with another, is…I’m honored, humbled, awestruck…so very many things.” He smiled timidly. “I’ve never been someone’s first anything before.”

My brows shot up, but I managed to keep my mouth shut.

“Maude, there’s something I’d like to ask you, but…”

“Shoot.”

“All right. This may be terribly intrusive, and feel free to not answer it if you don’t feel comfortable doing so, but…knowing what I do about you, sexually, I’m…surprised…that you…erm, never…anyway, I suppose I’m just wondering why.”

I sighed. Good job, Maude. This is what you get for trying to be a seductress.

“Long story short, you’re only the fourth person I’ve been intimate with. The first two were before I was twenty and not even remotely interested in such a thing. By the third I was very interested, but things fell apart before it happened.” I put my arms on the steering wheel and rested my forehead on them for a moment, then raised my head and turned to him. I couldn’t quite read the expression on his face.

“Okay, I’m not sure if that look means ‘I didn’t need to hear that’ or ‘wow, only three, what a loser’.”

He shook his head. “It’s neither. Well, maybe a bit of the first one, because the idea of you being with someone else is much more unpleasant than I would have imagined, but…it was mostly surprise that such an incredibly beautiful, intelligent, hilarious woman wouldn’t have men lining up to be with her.”

“Thomas. Stop being so fucking wonderful, won’t you? Christ. There was no line, believe me. I’ve always been at least a little chubby, but after I moved to New York I put on a huge amount of weight. There are reasons for that, but that’s another story for another time. By 2003 I was tipping the scales at two hundred and forty-seven pounds. I’ve always been a confident person, and I honestly never cared what anyone else thought about the way I looked, but…you know what I’m getting at here, I think. In late 2008 I started feeling like shit, and Anne, who’d nearly died due to undiagnosed diabetes in 2003, pushed me to see a doctor. Sure enough, that was the problem. It was early, and resolvable with lifestyle modifications. So, I kicked myself in the ass, and over the next year I lost more than eighty pounds, and that was when I…a woman in her sexual prime, in the best shape of her life…met number three. God bless him…I was on a mission, making up for lost time and he could barely keep up with me. One time I actually thought he was going to need an ambulance…sheese, why I am telling you this? Yikes. Sorry. Lord knows I don’t want to hear anything like it from you.” I unbuckled my seat belt. “Let’s pretend this never happened and go get those milkshakes, m’kay?”

He grabbed my arm as I opened the door, and I turned to meet his gaze. “I…Maude…I just…you are…everything about you…” He shook his head. “I fall deeper in love with you with every passing moment.”

“Right back atcha, baby.” He laughed. “Yeah. No way I was going to try and out-eloquent you there. Waste of time and energy.”

We went inside, his arm around my shoulders, and ordered two Happy Meals when we saw the new toys were Minions. Neither of us could resist playing with them as we ate. Tom went back for a Big Mac and chicken nuggets, which I shared. He stuck his fingers in through the lid of my milkshake, deftly picking up the cherry and popping it in his mouth, a huge smile on his face.

We both used the bathroom, separately, and as we were walking back to the Jeep I heard the voice of a young boy.

“Mom, Mom! That man over there! That’s the man you’re always looking at on your computer!”

A woman replied to him. “Mason, what are you talking ab…?” And with that, I knew she’d seen Tom. I pulled at his shirt, and he looked down at me and nodded. We turned around and waved. The woman was about my age, maybe a little older, and she looked like she might die of embarrassment when she realized we’d overheard their conversation. Tom strode over, hand extended.

“Hi there. Tom Hiddleston. And you are?” She moved as if in a trance, hand out, and he grasped it gently and shook.

“I…uh…um…Sarah. I’m Sarah. And this is my son, Mason.”

Tom beamed and shook Mason’s hand as well. “Lovely to meet you both.”

Sarah reached into her purse, dug around and pulled out a Coriolanus program. She cleared her throat. “I heard that you’d be on the island and I’ve been carrying this with me, you know, just in case.”

He took it from her. “Were you in attendance?”

Mason piped up. “We flew all the way across two oceans so she could go see your show. I saw Big Ben. It was really cool.”

Sarah was bright red. “I saw it twice, actually, but didn’t have time to stay after.”

Tom pulled a sharpie out of his back pocket. “May I?”

She grinned. “Please do.” He signed his name, as well as a message. ‘Sorry to have missed you there, but better late than never. Glad to finally have met you. XO’”

As he handed it back to her he asked if she’d like a picture with him. He introduced us, and I volunteered to do the honors so Mason could squeeze in as well. I gave him my Minion to keep him occupied while I took some shots of just Sarah and Tom. He held it up to give it back to me when I handed Sarah back her phone.

“Nope, buddy, that’s yours now.” I held out my hand to Tom and he put his toy in it. “In fact, you can have Tom’s too. This way he gets to stay with his friend and won’t be lonely.” He thanked me so quietly I could barely hear him, eyes full of wonder at what to an adult was such a small gesture.

Tom hugged them both goodbye, and Sarah embraced me as well. She smiled at my surprise. “Thank you, both of you, so much.”

Tom put his arm around my waist as we walked the rest of the way back to the Jeep, placing a quick kiss on the top of my head.

“It is my personal opinion that you’re a much kinder, gentler person than you’d like everyone to believe.”

I sighed. “Yeah, yeah. And it’s all your fucking fault, too.”

[vinylexams]

Planet Score Records - St. Louis, Missouri

Today’s featured record store is none other than Planet Score Records (@planetscore) in St. Louis, Missouri! After hearing from so many of you that wanted me to feature your favorite shops in the land, Planet Score was the first to get back to me with lots of great pics of the shop and some great answers to a list of questions you all will become familiar with as more and more independently owned stores get featured here. The features on Instagram will be as lengthy as the word count will allow, but the full interview and features will always be available in their entirety on vinylexams.com so if you don’t have it bookmarked yet, do it!

Planet Score Records is a music store that’s been a St. Louis staple for years but was purchased and revamped in 2015 by long-time employee of the previous shop, Joe Stulce, and his friend from his years in the 2000s playing in bands around the city, Tim Lohmann. The Guided by Voices (@instagbv) fans here will probably recognize the name, but don’t worry, not only did they get Mr. Pollard’s personal approval, he’s even become a friend of the owners and the shop and is known to stop by from time to time (check out the pics above!).

Here’s the nitty gritty:

Hours:

Monday- Thursday 10am-8pm

Friday- Saturday 10am-9pm

Sunday- 12pm- 5pm

Planet Score Records

7421 Manchester Rd.

St. Louis, MO 63143

314-282-0777

And here’s the interview:

Tell us about your store and how it came to be:

Tim Lohmann (Planet Score co-owner) and I met in the early 2000's playing in bands together in the St. Louis music scene. I had been working at a long standing record store called Record Reunion since the late 90's (re-branded CD Reunion during the CD boom). It was always my favorite shop, long before I got a job there. My friends and I would hang out there almost every day after school, exploring the vast catalog and educating ourselves on all things music. Not long after I started working there, I was promoted to full time manager. In 2015 the owner of RR decided to retire and Tim and I bought the business from him. We really just wanted the stock and planned from the get-go to move the store out of the county and closer to the city (where we lived) and re-brand and re-vamp it. We quickly found a great location in the Maplewood shopping and restaurant district.

We chose the name Planet Score after a Guided by Voices song. Robert Pollard of GBV got wind of our idea, gave us his blessing to use the name, and has since become a friend, popping into the shop when he is in town. Being that Tim and I are both music obsessives and we grew up in record stores, we strive to create our ideal of the perfect record shopping environment. Fun, cool and friendly; the kind of place people will feel comfortable spending hours on end shopping, exploring and chatting about our collective obsessions.

Does your shop specialize in any specific genres of music?

We carry every genre: rock, pop, soul, jazz, blues, hip-hop, punk, metal, world, country, classical... you name it. We are personally really into psychedelic rock, punk, prog, jazz, funk, krautrock, post-punk, electronic, hip-hop, exotica, Indian, African, reggae... St. Louis is a big classic rock city, so we always have a lot of that on hand. LP's, 7"s, CD's, cassettes, movies, posters, even 8-tracks and reel-to-reel tapes.

If you had to estimate, about how much of your inventory is used vs new?

Probably around 70% used, 30% new. Reissues and new vinyl are cool and readily available, but there's nothing like the thrill of the hunt.

What do YOU think makes your shop special?

Customer service is really important. Either one or both (usually both) of the owners are running the shop every single day, and we make sure to interact with every person who comes through the door. We love getting to know our regulars, and keeping an eye out for records that we think they are into. You will never have to deal with a grumpy, clueless part-timer, or a pretentious record store snob here. We are music obsessives who are extremely passionate about what we do. We still get as excited about records now as we did when we were kids. We also try to stock stuff that we don't think is readily available elsewhere. The deep cuts if you will. We are a relatively small shop, and we are careful not to stuff the bins with filler and thrift store junk. Plus we love throwing events and parties: Record Store Day and special sales... our neighborhood will throw weekend events that we always take part in... Our secret weapon is our best bud Joey Bags, a chef who loves to cook for us and our customers. There is an amazing craft brewery, Schlafly Bottleworks, a couple of blocks from us and they always help us out with our parties. We are lucky to have some amazing friends, family and neighbors that always help us out behind the scenes.

What makes running a record store fun and exciting for you?

It's my one and only dream job. I've thought about it many times, and there is nothing else I would rather be doing. To be able to make a living listening to and talking about music all day is a dream come true. Exploring new and old sounds, digging through forgotten collections and bringing joy to fellow obsessives. Music lovers really are the best people to be surrounded by on a daily basis.

What is your most prized record?/Have you finally snagged your ultimate “white whale” yet?

Tim and I both kind of put our collecting on hold when we started Planet Score. We have even sold off large chunks of our personal collections to help build up the business. We get to play records all day, so having a huge collection sitting in our houses gathering dust is not as important as it used to be. We see records come through all the time that we would love to bring home (it hurts sometimes!), even stuff that I never thought I would see in real life. But seeing someone else find that record that they have been searching for brings just as much joy (well, almost as much...). Though, if I ever come across an original copy of GBV's Propeller that might change.

=====

Well, there you have it folks! Please, if you’re in the area, stop by and say hello to Tim and Joe and tell ‘em VINYLEXAMS sent ya!

As always, we encourage you to shop small and support the wonderful independently owned shops like Planet Score whenever you can. These stores make the scene exciting and fun and all of us started our love for our collections in dusty crates somewhere! Thanks Joe and Tim, I can’t wait to swing by!

VINYLEXAMS

[fumpkins]

All the new products from Apple's 'Spring Loaded' announcement event

The build-up for Apple’s Spring Loaded 2021 product announcement event is finally over. Today, Tim Cook takes the stage to unleash a new wave of Apple products onto the market. We’ll be watching live in the player embedded below and breaking down all the new stuff as it happens. Just keep scrolling to read the rolling recap.

Here’s a list of some new products we could see, including a new iPad Pro model, a revamped Apple TV, and possibly some new AirPods.

Let’s get to the event!

Tim Cook starts by talking about the company’s environmental impact. Earth Day happens on Thursday, so it makes sense to start there. He restates the carbon neutrality goals.

Apple Card

Cook says the Apple Card had the “most successful” credit card launch ever. Starting today, Apple Card will allow spouses and partners to hold a card together, so both will be able to use it to build credit. Apple Card Family also allows anyone in the family over 13 reap the benefits of using the card.

Apple Podcasts

Apple is redesigning the Podcasts app with a whole new look and introducing channels to help find new content from creators. There will also now be a subscription option, so creators can charge money for special access like early listening and special episodes.

New purple iPhones

Trippy purple iPhones showed up on 4/20. Convenient.

Is it simply coincidence that the new purple iPhone makes its debut on 4/20? Maybe. It’s coming to the iPhone 12 lineup in a few weeks.

AirTag

AirTags will help you find all the stuff you lose. Apple

After literally years of speculation, Apple has finally released its own physical location tags. They will work with any iPhone with the U1 chip inside for hyper-accurate location information. The app works with Find My and guides you along a path to find the lost tag.

Apple says it has added unwanted tag detection and other safeguards to prevent you from sneaking a tag on a person and tracking them.

They’re $29 each and $99 for a four pack. You can opt for the fancier Hermes leather AirTags if you’re rolling in Dogecoin profits.

Apple TV

The new Apple TV remote looks better, but I’d still love more buttons.

We’re getting a new season of Ted Lasso in July! That’s fantastic news! Looks like there’s new hardware, too.

The new Apple TV 4K gets the A12 Bionic chip, which allows it to play HDR content in high framerates. The Apple TV now uses the iPhone’s camera and proximity sensor to calibrate your TV’s color. This is a familiar process for home theater nerds, but should make a big difference for average folks.

Apple finally redesigned the remote! It has a jog wheel and the Siri button is on the side. I’m skeptical still.

The new Apple TV starts at $179 with 32 GB storage, or $199 with 64 GB.

M1 Macs

Rumors suggested we might get some new M1 machines, and it looks like that’s the case. The new colorful iMac was designed specifically for the M1 chip. It comes in a variety of colors to add “a sense of joy.”

The new iMac is extremely skinny thanks to M1. There only two fans inside, so it stays under ten decibels most of the time. Apple says it has reduced the overall sound it makes by 50 percent.

The 24-inch screen sits under one edge-to-edge piece of glass. 11.3-million pixels in the 4.5K retina display. P3 Gamut with a billion colors make this thing seem like a monster. It has a low-reflectivity coating to fight glare.

Apple has upgraded the camera, microphones, and speakers as a nod to the Pandemic video chatting boom. It has a 1080p camera with a larger sensor. It uses the M1’s image signal processor to add some computational adjustments to the picture to make it look better. It also now has a three microphone array tuned to ignore noise from the system. It has a six-speaker audio system inside. Apple is amped about the sound going on here.

Someone slap a keyboard in a clamshell on this thing. I want a 24-inch MacBook Pro.

Apple says you’ll notice a 2x speed bump in some resource-heavy applications like Adobe apps. The announcement lists a lot of arbitrary comparison numbers, but real world tests will show how big the difference is. I expect it to be very good, though.

The computer has four USB-C ports, two of which are Thunderbolt. It has a new magnetic power adapter on its two-meter cable. The power cable looks like the one that comes with the MacBook. Ethernet now connects via the power cable.

In addition to the new machine, it also comes with matching mouse and keyboard options. The new Magic Keyboard has Touch ID built in.

This looks handy.

It starts at $1,299 and it will ship in the first half of May. The upgraded version will be $1,499 and up. I have a feeling Apple is going to sell a lot of these.

M1-Powered iPads

After a long, spy-themed cinematic video, Apple just revealed the M1-powered iPad. Again, we get a lot of speed comparisons, which are hard to wrap your head around. The short version: It’s going to be absurdly fast. There’s a new 2 TB configuration, too, for storing tons of data. It gets Thunderbolt support for better storage and external display compatibility.

The new iPad Pro also has 5G inside now. Everything gets 5G! Hooray!

The new True Depth camera system now has a 12-megapixel ultra-wide camera. It enables a new feature called Center Stage, which uses machine learning to track you as you move around the frame.

The 12.9-inch pro has a 5.6-million pixel screen. It has the same performance as the XDR display. It offers 1,000 nits of overall brightness and 1,600 nix of peak brightness. It really does sound like a miniature version of the Pro display.

As predicted, the new 12.9-inch iPad Pro uses mini LED backlight system. It involves tons of very small backlights. There are more than 10,000 of them back there behind the display.

The 12.9-inch model starts at $1,099, which is still a lot, but you also get….a lot. Choosing between that and the M1 MacBook Air seems kinda tricky. Buying into the iPad will be considerably more expensive, though, once you add the keyboard case and Apple Pencil.

That’s it for the announcements! There’s a lot to unpack here, so look for product reviews in the coming weeks.

New post published on: https://livescience.tech/2021/04/26/all-the-new-products-from-apples-spring-loaded-announcement-event/

[caveartfair]

The Collecting Couple Promoting Emerging, Diverse Art in Dallas

Kristen and Joe Cole in their Dallas home. Photo by Katy Shayne.

Interior view of Joe and Kristen Cole’s Dallas home featuring artwork by Tony Matelli. Photo by Katy Shayne. Courtesy of Joe and Kristen Cole.

Last August, when the emergent art collecting couple Joe and Kristen Cole moved from Austin to Dallas, they wanted to find a home where they could showcase their developing collection. They are of a new generation of Texas art patrons and buy work by living artists who don’t necessarily have overwhelming market heat in New York and London. The artists they collect are often young women whose work might never end up on the walls of the more staid older guard of the city’s collecting class.

But among the new guard, the Coles are gaining prominence. In a quite literal passing of the baton, the Coles decided to move into the Preston Hollow home built by Howard and Cindy Rachofsky, arguably the city’s foundational art collectors, where they had raised a family amid a revolving display of contemporary art.

“It feels right—it’s a 1990s modernist house built by collectors,” Kristen Cole said while sitting on a white couch in the sprawling living room, which looks out onto a tasteful backyard with a pool, light streaming in from a big glass sliding door. “It’s the only house we looked at in Dallas. We were just like: Done! Easy!”

Interior view of Joe and Kristen Cole’s Dallas home featuring artwork by Katherine Bernhardt. Photo by Katy Shayne. Courtesy of Joe and Kristen Cole.

Interior view of Joe and Kristen Cole’s Dallas home featuring artwork by Julian Stanczak. Photo by Katy Shayne. Courtesy of Joe and Kristen Cole.

“We love Howard and Cindy,” she added. “Howard was one of the first people we met down here. He really did blow my mind in terms of how thoughtful a collector he is.”

It was a Wednesday afternoon, and the house was abuzz with kids home from school and soccer practice, music humming from the kitchen, and an adorable, extremely enthusiastic French bulldog named Kiki yipping and repeatedly jumping upon the visiting reporter. Kristen had left work early—she is the president and chief creative officer of Forty Five Ten, the Dallas-based high-fashion boutique that just opened an instantly Instagram-famous store in New York’s Hudson Yards. It’s been called the “Millennial generation’s answer to Barney’s” and sells unconventional and hard-to-find wares.

Joe, who works as a creative consultant for Forty Five Ten’s billionaire owner Tim Headington, was wearing a hard-to-cop shirt from a line called Shrits, in which he’s an angel investor—it’s available only in person, and only on Saturdays, at the Marlborough Contemporary gallery in New York’s Chelsea neighborhood. (Max Levai, Marlborough’s principal director, is the brand’s official plus-size model.) Joe’s shirt (or “shrit”) is a spin on the iconic Nirvana shirt, but with “ARIANA” (as in, Ariana Grande) in the original font, and a doughnut instead of the smiley face (a reference to that time Grande got caught on tape licking donuts she wasn’t buying and saying “I hate America.”) It was designed by the artist Andrew Kuo, whom the Coles collect, and Marlborough director Pascal Spengemann.

Interior view of Joe and Kristen Cole’s Dallas home featuring artwork by Sarah Braham. Photo by Katy Shayne. Courtesy of Joe and Kristen Cole.

The couple was preparing to receive an onslaught of visitors during the week of the Dallas Art Fair, and their house—which the Rachofskys had modernist maven Lionel Morrison design for them in 1997—is an ideal place to hang and show off art. But the old guard of Dallas collectors tend to buy big, flashy masterpieces by established market juggernauts. Rachofsky buys Donald Judd and Robert Ryman and once owned Jeff Koons’s Balloon Flower (Magenta) (1995–99), before selling it at Christie’s for $25.8 million in 2008. The Coles, however, have worked with a tight-knit crew of dealers to build up a collection reflecting their singular taste.

They started to buy while living in Los Angeles, where, in 2008, the couple founded TenOverSix, a boutique that treated avant-garde accessories and clothing as artworks by placing them in a gallery-like context. The couple moved to Austin in 2015, where they ran the hospitality group ByGeorge while Joe worked for Headington, whose revamped and expanded Joule Hotel opened in Dallas in 2013 with a lobby area overseen by the Coles along with Brady Cunningham, complete with a new outpost of TenOverSix on the premises. In 2018, Headington bought TenOverSix and put Kristen Cole in charge of the entire operation.

And so, after spending 18 months building out a mid-century house in Austin, the Coles had to relocate to Dallas. Not that they didn’t welcome the move.

“Dallas is a much bigger city than Austin, it’s much more connected,” said Joe.

“It’s got an international airport, so that’s a first step,” said Kristen.

Interior view of Joe and Kristen Cole’s Dallas home featuring artwork by Katherine Bradford. Photo by Katy Shayne. Courtesy of Joe and Kristen Cole.

Interior view of Joe and Kristen Cole’s Dallas home featuring artwork by Al Freeman. Photo by Katy Shayne. Courtesy of Joe and Kristen Cole.

Moving to a city with a well-established collecting culture allowed them to present their formidable collection of work by young artists, which serves as a funkier, hipper counterpoint to the city’s brawnier collections with public-facing exhibition apparatuses such as Deedie Rose’s Pump House, the Rachofskys’ Warehouse, and the Karpidas Collection.

“It started out for us a little bit more with photography—I was a little bit buried under a shoe,” Joe said. “And as we continued to mature and spend more time and more money on things, we started getting into paintings and sculpture. For us, it’s more of a visceral reaction—we don’t put much effort into necessarily deciding if something’s going to be a good purchase or a bad purchase. It’s even more about seeing something, getting a bug, and then I can’t get it out of my head and I start to obsess.”

He added: “Generally that process happens in about five minutes.”

Katherine Bernhardt, Turquoise, 2019. Courtesy of Canada.

Photo by Todora Photography.

Increasingly, the work the Coles can’t get out of their heads is by emerging female artists. When Kristen came into the main foyer, we embarked on a quick tour while Kiki trotted beside and barked up a storm. Installed right now in Morrison’s 5,800-square-foot, light-filled house are works by Katherine Bradford, Sam Moyer, Katherine Bernhardt, Margaux Ogden, and a Sarah Braman consisting of a twisty beach chair atop a colorful rock. One of Al Freeman’s soft sculptures—a giant pillowy electrical cord given elephantiasis in Oldenburgian fashion—can be seen while walking up the modernist staircase.

“We inadvertently started collecting a lot of female artists,” Joe said. “But then, in the climate that we’ve been in the last couple of years, as we kind of realized that that was happening, we did start to pay a little bit more attention to that and embrace that, and I think that’s been really fun.”

The couple’s taste is already having an impact on the city, or at least on the stretch of downtown where the Headington Companies enjoys its little fiefdom. There’s the usual miasma of events and exhibitions surrounding the Dallas Art Fair, which opened its 11th edition this week in the Fashion Industry Gallery downtown, welcoming nearly 100 galleries from around the world to the land of big wallets and bigger hair; Joe and Kristen were there at the opening, chatting up local cultural figures such as Dallas Contemporary director Peter Doroshenko and Anna Katherine Brodbeck, the tastemaking senior curator of contemporary art at the Dallas Museum of Art. Just blocks away, Freeman had opened a show of new work at Forty Five Ten put together by Kristen, who earlier this year unveiled a new installation by Bernhardt that took over the coffee shop in the boutique’s lobby. The Joule is across the street, and in the lobby are new sculptures by Tony Matelli, an exhibition Joe had put together with Spengemann, Matelli’s dealer. Matelli is another artist the Coles collect. Entering their house, on the right there is a stone sculpture of Jesus adorned with very realistic-looking crab claws, a sly provocation typical of Matelli.

Exterior view of Joe and Kristen Cole’s Dallas home. Photo by Todora Photography.

Joe said that while their desire to blend contemporary art and hospitality may be common in New York or L.A., it’s not yet a thing in Dallas. Well-heeled clients stepping into Neiman Marcus—which changed the national fashion retail landscape forever when it opened in downtown Dallas in 1907—don’t necessarily expect to see something like a giant Katherine Bernhardt mural.

“It’s catching on here—in a lot of other markets I don’t think you see this much art in these commercial environments,” Joe Cole said. “As far as Dallas is concerned, it’s been contagious.”

The Coles cooked up one more contribution to the run of events here in Dallas this week: An outdoor selling show of paintings that opened at their house on Friday, with the work being offered to local collectors by galleries representing artists whom the Coles collect. The couple put it together with Marlborough’s Levai and Spengemann, and Canada Gallery’s Phil Grauer and Suzanne Butler.

“Pascal and I were talking at one point, saying, oh, we’re going to be here all week—how can we expand what we’re doing at the fair?” Joe said. “And you know they have the Bridge outdoor art fair in the Hamptons, and he had this idea about putting paintings outside of someone’s house. I said, ‘I have a house.’”

Exterior view of Joe and Kristen Cole’s Dallas home. Photo by Todora Photography.

Paintings are not typically installed outside due to, you know, the high chance of a common weather occurence that can destroy them. As Joe put it Wednesday, “It’s a certain element of risk as, if it rains, it doesn’t happen, which I think is part of the fun of it.” But by 3 p.m. Friday afternoon, with no rain clouds on the horizon, a few dozen people were drinking margaritas and Modelos, eating chips and queso, and taking in the large works by Bernhardt, Bradford, Greg Bogin, Devin Troy Strother, Mark Flood, and more. Others were sitting poolside, basking in the sunshine.

Kristen mentioned Wednesday they were hoping neighbors would come, and said some of the attendees would be close enough to walk. But Preston Hollow is the epitome of the Dallas old guard, home to billionaires Ross Perot, T. Boone Pickens, and Mark Cuban. The home of George W. Bush, 43rd president of the United States, is a 10 minute walk from the Cole house.

But the outdoor painting show, featuring many of the same artists the Coles collect, was geared toward the Dallas collectors of the future—the crowd on Friday was lively and young, not the typical Preston Hollow scene. And the show offered collectors pieces that could push them to collect work by living, vibrant artists—the new guard fully taking over the former home of a pillar of the old guard.

“We have a few friends who are collectors or advisors and we’re all kind of in the same conversation,” Kristen said. “And maybe we’re at different levels here and there, but I think we are the next generation of people who are going to continue this.”

from Artsy News

[sheminecrafts]

Digitizing Burning Man

For decades, Burning Man has represented an escape from the current reality. An event for free-er spirits to rethink new age ideals inside a stateless entity where art, music and partying reign supreme on the desert plains.

Over the years, the Bay Area-founded event has dealt with an internal clash as the gathering has grown larger and attracted a heavy presence from Silicon Valley’s wealthy tech class, with tales of turnkey experiences, air-conditioned camps, helicopters and lobster dinners. Now, under the shadow of a historic pandemic, the organization behind the massive, iconic event is desperately working to stick to its roots while avoiding financial ruin as it pivots the 2020 festival to a digital format with the pro bono help of some of its tech industry attendees.

With just a few weeks before the event is set to kick off, the organization is bringing together a group of technologists with backgrounds in virtual reality, blockchain, hypnotism and immersive theatre to create a web of hacked-together social products that they hope will capture the atmosphere of Burning Man.

Going virtual is an unprecedented move for an event that’s mere existence already seems to defy precedent.

Burning Man is held in late August every year inside Nevada’s Black Rock Desert. For nine days, the attendees, who refer to themselves as Burners, fill up the desolate landscape with massive art installations, stages and camps. Attendance has been climbing over the past several decades, to the point that the federal government got involved, creating a more than 170-page report arguing why the event’s attendance should be capped. More than 78,000 people attended in 2019.

It’s an escape from society in a shared social experience that doesn’t seem to be replicable elsewhere.

Black Rock City irl. // Viaggio Routard (opens in a new window) / Flickr (opens in a new window) under a CC BY 2.0 (opens in a new window) license.

The Multiverse

Steven Blumenfeld became the CTO of Burning Man days before the org’s leaders publicly announced that, due to the COVID-19 pandemic, the physical event was being abruptly canceled and the team was going all-in on a virtual gathering. Though the serial CTO expected the position to largely involve crusty tasks maintaining the event’s media infrastructure, he soon was pressed to rethink the front-end of a sprawling event that’s decades old and steeped in lore.

“My first inclination is, ‘Great! Let’s go build a big 3D VR world blah blah blah… So then I spent the first two weeks looking at what I had for staff, what I had for time frame, and what we could actually do,” Blumenfeld says. “There was just no way. And you know, I actually still wanted to do it. I wanted a challenge… but the reality was it just wasn’t going to happen.”

Burning Man is a massive undertaking, with a particularly deep emotional hold inside San Francisco, where it was first held in 1986, and by extension Silicon Valley. It isn’t all that surprising that when the Burning Man Project announced the event was making the move to a digital format, there was a rapid influx of community input to help decipher what an on-the-grid virtual Burning Man might look like.

“We had 14,000 people tell us they wanted to contribute in some way to a virtual Black Rock City,” said Kim Cook, the org’s director of art and civic engagement. “Some of them said what they wanted to contribute was love; so that’s cool. We also had around a thousand of them say they wanted to do developer-type work.”

Some of the groups that reached out to the Burning Man Project were companies that were willing to build a Burning Man experience but wanted official branding present. Despite a precarious financial position, Burning Man’s organizers declined help from these sponsors, citing the org’s adherence to “de-commodification” — a desire to prevent corporate infiltration of the event, eschewing advertising, branded stages and corporate partnerships.

Turning away from the professional studios, Blumenfeld and others settled on a network of small indie teams filled with Burners that were willing to develop the official digital experiences for the event on their own time.

Image Credits: BLM Nevada (opens in a new window) / Flickr (opens in a new window) under a CC BY 2.0 (opens in a new window) license.

A new moment for social networking

Eight projects eventually emerged as official “recognized universes,” each taking drastically different approaches to what a virtual Burning Man should look like. While some focus their efforts on virtual reality, others add social layers to video chat or build 3D environments on top of existing platforms like Second Life or Microsoft’s AltspaceVR .

During the pandemic, revamped developer conferences and trade shows have been able to port keynote addresses or panels to a Zoom format fairly seamlessly, but there are plenty of elements of the Burning Man experience that the teams involved realize might be impossible to replicate with online platforms. The developers creating the event’s virtual worlds are determined to rethink the conventions of online social networking to ensure that Burners make new friends this year.

“The sense of awe and scale is tricky,” says Ed Cooke, who is building one of the official apps. “One way of explaining Burning Man is that it’s a state of mind that you access as a side effect of all the things that happen on the way there.”

Cooke, a London startup founder who also boasts the title of Grand Memory Master, earned for — among other things — memorizing the order of 10 decks of cards in less than an hour, has been building SparkleVerse with his friend Chris Adams, whose daytime gig is as a senior software manager at Airbnb.

Their web app, which pairs a 2D map interface with video chat windows, is primarily focused on advancing how shared context can facilitate and better frame social relationships.

Amid quarantine, the pair tells TechCrunch they have been creating deeply complicated video chat parties for their friends. One example is a moon-themed party where they created a clickable map of the lunar surface that guided the 200 attendees through 16 separate virtual spaces with their own themes. Before the party kicked off, the hosts walked people through the “experience of traveling to the moon” by guiding them through the effects of zero gravity and instructing them to play along with experiencing it. Another hot tub-themed party invited guests to jump into their bath tub before firing up Zoom.

Cooke and Adams are leaning on some of these mechanics to create a Burning Man theme, hoping that taking cues from immersive theatre will enable people to commit more deeply to the experience. The acts of driving, losing your phone connection and growing tired and hungry on the way to the physical event add to a “spaciousness in your consciousness” that allows people to act more freely, Cooke says. He wants participants to replicate these experiences by taking steps outside their normal life in the run-up to the event, whether that’s sitting through an obscenely long video chat session to simulate a drive to the desert or setting up a tent in their living room, or cutting off their water line and avoiding showers during the nine days.

“All of this is embedding you further and further into this distant context, miles away from your normal life, where effectively in the course of this, you’re just becoming a radically less boring person,” Cooke explains in a nine-minute video outlining the platform.

Many of the apps are building on the idea of how spatial interfaces can feed greater social context and make it easier to approach people and make new friends.

Another official app, Build-a-Burn, takes the idea of a stylized 2D interface for video chat even further with a sketched-out grayscale map of Black Rock City that users can navigate little stick figures across. As a user moves through different camps and their avatars get physically close to each other, new video chat screens fade in and users can gain the experience of venturing into a new social bubble.

A screenshot of Build-a-Burn

While Build-a-Burn and SparkleVerse are leaning more heavily on video chat, other experiences hope that creating massive 3D landscapes that match the scale of the real-world event will help people get into the spirit of the event.

Other than Burn2, which is wholly contained within the Second Life platform, most of the 3D-centric apps integrate some level of virtual reality support. Projects that support VR headsets include The Infinite Playa, The Bridge Experience, MysticVerse, BRCvr (which taps into Microsoft’s AltspaceVR platform) and Multiverse.

Each of the VR experiences will also allow users to join on mobile or desktop, an effort to ensure that the apps are more widely accessible.

Over on Extra Crunch, read about how a new generation of chat apps are leaning on game-like interfaces

Multiverse creator Faryar Ghazanfari, who runs an AR startup and previously worked on Tesla’s legal team, says that the motivations for building his app were a bit on the selfish side, telling TechCrunch that he became “extremely sad” after the physical event’s cancellation and felt the need to help build a place where he could reunite with his own camp.

Screenshot from a demo of Multiverse.

Ghazanfari tells TechCrunch he feels a responsibility in creating the environment that other Burners will experience; he says his chief concern is capturing the event’s complexity. Compared to the other apps, Multiverse focuses primarily on providing a photorealistic 3D playground where avatars can zoom around.

“As Burners, we don’t think of Burning Man as just a music festival or art festival; it is much more than that. Burning Man is a social experiment of creating a community out of a shared struggle,” Ghazanfari says.

Each of the Burning Man-approved apps seem to engage with evoking that shared struggle differently, which appears to be the most looming challenge of moving this event to a virtual format. While the apps hope to bring elements of the physical event into their virtual spaces, the creators also seem to realize that aiming to compete with attendees’ past memories is unwise. It’s a challenge that has been faced by dozens of startups in the virtual reality space over the past several years.

“I think the main challenge is taking something that exists in reality and then porting it into a different platform,” said Adam Arrigo, CEO of Wave, a venture-backed startup that initially launched a VR app for music concerts but has since shifted focus to mobile and desktop experiences. “When you’re in these digital spaces, the agency that you have as a user and the experiences you can create are so different than something that could exist, even at a concert.”

Image Credits: Burning Man 2012 Hawaii Savvy (opens in a new window) / Flickr (opens in a new window) under a CC BY 2.0 (opens in a new window) license.

Financial uncertainty

Perhaps the biggest unknown, as the organization readies for Burning Man’s August 30 start date, is that nobody really has any idea how many people are going to show up. While Blumenfeld pointed me to suggestions the entire digital event could attract up to 30,000 people over its nine-day run, Ghazanfari hopes that hundreds of thousands or millions of users will come into the fold of his experience.

Another point of contention internally is how exactly the groups plan to monetize these digital experiences.

In 2020, the standard ticket price for Burning Man was $475. The organization postponed the “main sale” of tickets prior to this year’s physical event’s cancellation, but they had already sold tens of thousands of tickets. Ticket holders will have the option of being refunded, but the organization has encouraged those who “have the means” to consider making a full or partial donation of the ticket price instead.

In 2018, Burning Man cost $44 million for the organization to produce, according to tax documents. The Burning Man Project reported about $43 million in ticket sales from that event, with other donations and revenue streams bringing the nonprofit’s total revenue for that fiscal year to about $46 million. In a blog post, the event’s organizers noted that though the group had event insurance, they were not covered for a cancellation caused by a pandemic. Burning Man Project says it has $10 million in cash reserves, but that it anticipates draining through that funding by the end of the year to stay afloat. The organization is listed as having received a loan from the federal government’s Paycheck Protection Program for between $2-5 million.

While some like Ghazanfari are pushing to make their experiences free to access with the option of giving a donation later, others expressed desire for a single digital ticket that would give attendees access to all eight digital experiences. Cooke says users will need to pay a $50 entrance fee to access the SparkleVerse.

The disparate nature of the experience being built this year — with some being shipped as native apps, others in HTML5 and others inside existing tech platforms — meant that a unified ticketing platform just wouldn’t work, Blumenfeld told TechCrunch. Not all of the developers were thrilled with this outcome, which they fear could fracture attendance at events on certain platforms. The biggest concern seemed to be ensuring that all of this effort pays off in some way for the organization so that they can continue to host the Burning Man event post-pandemic.

“One of the biggest reasons we’re all doing this is to help Burning Man survive, because the Burning Man organization unfortunately was really badly hit because of COVID,” Ghazanfari says. “The organization is in kind of a precarious situation financially.”

The organization has attracted criticism in recent years for the event’s inclusiveness. Some of the developers acknowledge that planning for a nine-day trip to the middle of the desert can be daunting and prohibitively expensive for people that want to join the community, and they hope that this year’s shift to a digital format will open up the event to more people and that these apps can be a less intimidating way for skeptics to get a taste of the community.

Image Credits: BLM Nevada (opens in a new window) / Flickr (opens in a new window) under a CC BY 2.0 (opens in a new window) license.

Thinking of the future

None of the developers behind the digital experiences are being paid for their efforts building these apps. However, the Burning Man Project has given at least some of them perpetual licenses to continue operating these digital platforms with the Burning Man name and an option to monetize, though a percentage of proceeds will be kicked back to the organization.

While getting this event across the finish line by the end of the month is daunting enough, the Burning Man Project is also trying to consider how its rapid learnings will apply to next year, though they hope that the physical event returns for 2021.

Blumenfeld says he plans to spend the next year working on the background infrastructure so that items like gating and ticketing functions for a virtual Burning Man can all be centralized.

While having eight distinct experiences this year could complicate the goal of getting one big group together, developers concerned about troubleshooting their new apps or having a sudden influx of virtual Burners overwhelm their infrastructures view multiple entry points to the festival as a necessary logistical move. Organizers hope the diversity of options will keep things interesting for attendees.

“I think we’ve got a good mix, and part of it is, we want to learn,” Blumenfeld says. “What we’re trying very hard to avoid is being in Zoom meeting hell.”

Whether users are connecting via video chat or as avatars inside a large virtual world, the developers building Burning Man’s virtual experiences believe they are operating on the cutting edge of virtual interaction and that they are rethinking elements of modern social networking to create a virtual Burning Man where people will be able to form new social bonds.

“I’ve fallen in love with this idea that at some point in the future, some Ph.D. student in 300 years time is going to write a thesis on the first online Burning Man, because it does feel like an extraordinary moment of avant garde imagineering for what the future of human online interaction looks like,” Cooke tells TechCrunch.

Immersive chat startups have a very different vision for the future of voice

from iraidajzsmmwtv https://ift.tt/31Q0EGc via IFTTT

[technicalsolutions88]

For decades, Burning Man has represented an escape from the current reality. An event for free-er spirits to rethink new age ideals inside a stateless entity where art, music and partying reign supreme on the desert plains.

Over the years, the Bay Area-founded event has dealt with an internal clash as the gathering has grown larger and attracted a heavy presence from Silicon Valley’s wealthy tech class, with tales of turnkey experiences, air-conditioned camps, helicopters and lobster dinners. Now, under the shadow of a historic pandemic, the organization behind the massive, iconic event is desperately working to stick to its roots while avoiding financial ruin as it pivots the 2020 festival to a digital format with the pro bono help of some of its tech industry attendees.

With just a few weeks before the event is set to kick off, the organization is bringing together a group of technologists with backgrounds in virtual reality, blockchain, hypnotism and immersive theatre to create a web of hacked-together social products that they hope will capture the atmosphere of Burning Man.

Going virtual is an unprecedented move for an event that’s mere existence already seems to defy precedent.

Burning Man is held in late August every year inside Nevada’s Black Rock Desert. For nine days, the attendees, who refer to themselves as Burners, fill up the desolate landscape with massive art installations, stages and camps. Attendance has been climbing over the past several decades, to the point that the federal government got involved, creating a more than 170-page report arguing why the event’s attendance should be capped. More than 78,000 people attended in 2019.

It’s an escape from society in a shared social experience that doesn’t seem to be replicable elsewhere.

Black Rock City irl. // Viaggio Routard (opens in a new window) / Flickr (opens in a new window) under a CC BY 2.0 (opens in a new window) license.

The Multiverse

Steven Blumenfeld became the CTO of Burning Man days before the org’s leaders publicly announced that, due to the COVID-19 pandemic, the physical event was being abruptly canceled and the team was going all-in on a virtual gathering. Though the serial CTO expected the position to largely involve crusty tasks maintaining the event’s media infrastructure, he soon was pressed to rethink the front-end of a sprawling event that’s decades old and steeped in lore.

“My first inclination is, ‘Great! Let’s go build a big 3D VR world blah blah blah… So then I spent the first two weeks looking at what I had for staff, what I had for time frame, and what we could actually do,” Blumenfeld says. “There was just no way. And you know, I actually still wanted to do it. I wanted a challenge… but the reality was it just wasn’t going to happen.”

Burning Man is a massive undertaking, with a particularly deep emotional hold inside San Francisco, where it was first held in 1986, and by extension Silicon Valley. It isn’t all that surprising that when the Burning Man Project announced the event was making the move to a digital format, there was a rapid influx of community input to help decipher what an on-the-grid virtual Burning Man might look like.

“We had 14,000 people tell us they wanted to contribute in some way to a virtual Black Rock City,” said Kim Cook, the org’s director of art and civic engagement. “Some of them said what they wanted to contribute was love; so that’s cool. We also had around a thousand of them say they wanted to do developer-type work.”

Some of the groups that reached out to the Burning Man Project were companies that were willing to build a Burning Man experience but wanted official branding present. Despite a precarious financial position, Burning Man’s organizers declined help from these sponsors, citing the org’s adherence to “de-commodification” — a desire to prevent corporate infiltration of the event, eschewing advertising, branded stages and corporate partnerships.

Turning away from the professional studios, Blumenfeld and others settled on a network of small indie teams filled with Burners that were willing to develop the official digital experiences for the event on their own time.

Image Credits: BLM Nevada (opens in a new window) / Flickr (opens in a new window) under a CC BY 2.0 (opens in a new window) license.

A new moment for social networking

Eight projects eventually emerged as official “recognized universes,” each taking drastically different approaches to what a virtual Burning Man should look like. While some focus their efforts on virtual reality, others add social layers to video chat or build 3D environments on top of existing platforms like Second Life or Microsoft’s AltspaceVR.

During the pandemic, revamped developer conferences and trade shows have been able to port keynote addresses or panels to a Zoom format fairly seamlessly, but there are plenty of elements of the Burning Man experience that the teams involved realize might be impossible to replicate with online platforms. The developers creating the event’s virtual worlds are determined to rethink the conventions of online social networking to ensure that Burners make new friends this year.

“The sense of awe and scale is tricky,” says Ed Cooke, who is building one of the official apps. “One way of explaining Burning Man is that it’s a state of mind that you access as a side effect of all the things that happen on the way there.”

Cooke, a London startup founder who also boasts the title of Grand Memory Master, earned for — among other things — memorizing the order of 10 decks of cards in less than an hour, has been building SparkleVerse with his friend Chris Adams, whose daytime gig is as a senior software manager at Airbnb.

Their web app, which pairs a 2D map interface with video chat windows, is primarily focused on advancing how shared context can facilitate and better frame social relationships.

Amid quarantine, the pair tells TechCrunch they have been creating deeply complicated video chat parties for their friends. One example is a moon-themed party where they created a clickable map of the lunar surface that guided the 200 attendees through 16 separate virtual spaces with their own themes. Before the party kicked off, the hosts walked people through the “experience of traveling to the moon” by guiding them through the effects of zero gravity and instructing them to play along with experiencing it. Another hot tub-themed party invited guests to jump into their bath tub before firing up Zoom.

Cooke and Adams are leaning on some of these mechanics to create a Burning Man theme, hoping that taking cues from immersive theatre will enable people to commit more deeply to the experience. The acts of driving, losing your phone connection and growing tired and hungry on the way to the physical event add to a “spaciousness in your consciousness” that allows people to act more freely, Cooke says. He wants participants to replicate these experiences by taking steps outside their normal life in the run-up to the event, whether that’s sitting through an obscenely long video chat session to simulate a drive to the desert or setting up a tent in their living room, or cutting off their water line and avoiding showers during the nine days.

“All of this is embedding you further and further into this distant context, miles away from your normal life, where effectively in the course of this, you’re just becoming a radically less boring person,” Cooke explains in a nine-minute video outlining the platform.

Many of the apps are building on the idea of how spatial interfaces can feed greater social context and make it easier to approach people and make new friends.

Another official app, Build-a-Burn, takes the idea of a stylized 2D interface for video chat even further with a sketched-out grayscale map of Black Rock City that users can navigate little stick figures across. As a user moves through different camps and their avatars get physically close to each other, new video chat screens fade in and users can gain the experience of venturing into a new social bubble.

A screenshot of Build-a-Burn

While Build-a-Burn and SparkleVerse are leaning more heavily on video chat, other experiences hope that creating massive 3D landscapes that match the scale of the real-world event will help people get into the spirit of the event.

Other than Burn2, which is wholly contained within the Second Life platform, most of the 3D-centric apps integrate some level of virtual reality support. Projects that support VR headsets include The Infinite Playa, The Bridge Experience, MysticVerse, BRCvr (which taps into Microsoft’s AltspaceVR platform) and Multiverse.

Each of the VR experiences will also allow users to join on mobile or desktop, an effort to ensure that the apps are more widely accessible.

Over on Extra Crunch, read about how a new generation of chat apps are leaning on game-like interfaces

Multiverse creator Faryar Ghazanfari, who runs an AR startup and previously worked on Tesla’s legal team, says that the motivations for building his app were a bit on the selfish side, telling TechCrunch that he became “extremely sad” after the physical event’s cancellation and felt the need to help build a place where he could reunite with his own camp.

Screenshot from a demo of Multiverse.

Ghazanfari tells TechCrunch he feels a responsibility in creating the environment that other Burners will experience; he says his chief concern is capturing the event’s complexity. Compared to the other apps, Multiverse focuses primarily on providing a photorealistic 3D playground where avatars can zoom around.

“As Burners, we don’t think of Burning Man as just a music festival or art festival; it is much more than that. Burning Man is a social experiment of creating a community out of a shared struggle,” Ghazanfari says.

Each of the Burning Man-approved apps seem to engage with evoking that shared struggle differently, which appears to be the most looming challenge of moving this event to a virtual format. While the apps hope to bring elements of the physical event into their virtual spaces, the creators also seem to realize that aiming to compete with attendees’ past memories is unwise. It’s a challenge that has been faced by dozens of startups in the virtual reality space over the past several years.

“I think the main challenge is taking something that exists in reality and then porting it into a different platform,” said Adam Arrigo, CEO of Wave, a venture-backed startup that initially launched a VR app for music concerts but has since shifted focus to mobile and desktop experiences. “When you’re in these digital spaces, the agency that you have as a user and the experiences you can create are so different than something that could exist, even at a concert.”

Image Credits: Burning Man 2012 Hawaii Savvy (opens in a new window) / Flickr (opens in a new window) under a CC BY 2.0 (opens in a new window) license.

Financial uncertainty

Perhaps the biggest unknown, as the organization readies for Burning Man’s August 30 start date, is that nobody really has any idea how many people are going to show up. While Blumenfeld pointed me to suggestions the entire digital event could attract up to 30,000 people over its nine-day run, Ghazanfari hopes that hundreds of thousands or millions of users will come into the fold of his experience.

Another point of contention internally is how exactly the groups plan to monetize these digital experiences.

In 2020, the standard ticket price for Burning Man was $475. The organization postponed the “main sale” of tickets prior to this year’s physical event’s cancellation, but they had already sold tens of thousands of tickets. Ticket holders will have the option of being refunded, but the organization has encouraged those who “have the means” to consider making a full or partial donation of the ticket price instead.

In 2018, Burning Man cost $44 million for the organization to produce, according to tax documents. The Burning Man Project reported about $43 million in ticket sales from that event, with other donations and revenue streams bringing the nonprofit’s total revenue for that fiscal year to about $46 million. In a blog post, the event’s organizers noted that though the group had event insurance, they were not covered for a cancellation caused by a pandemic. Burning Man Project says it has $10 million in cash reserves, but that it anticipates draining through that funding by the end of the year to stay afloat. The organization is listed as having received a loan from the federal government’s Paycheck Protection Program for between $2-5 million.

While some like Ghazanfari are pushing to make their experiences free to access with the option of giving a donation later, others expressed desire for a single digital ticket that would give attendees access to all eight digital experiences. Cooke says users will need to pay a $50 entrance fee to access the SparkleVerse.

The disparate nature of the experience being built this year — with some being shipped as native apps, others in HTML5 and others inside existing tech platforms — meant that a unified ticketing platform just wouldn’t work, Blumenfeld told TechCrunch. Not all of the developers were thrilled with this outcome, which they fear could fracture attendance at events on certain platforms. The biggest concern seemed to be ensuring that all of this effort pays off in some way for the organization so that they can continue to host the Burning Man event post-pandemic.

“One of the biggest reasons we’re all doing this is to help Burning Man survive, because the Burning Man organization unfortunately was really badly hit because of COVID,” Ghazanfari says. “The organization is in kind of a precarious situation financially.”

The organization has attracted criticism in recent years for the event’s inclusiveness. Some of the developers acknowledge that planning for a nine-day trip to the middle of the desert can be daunting and prohibitively expensive for people that want to join the community, and they hope that this year’s shift to a digital format will open up the event to more people and that these apps can be a less intimidating way for skeptics to get a taste of the community.

Image Credits: BLM Nevada (opens in a new window) / Flickr (opens in a new window) under a CC BY 2.0 (opens in a new window) license.

Thinking of the future

None of the developers behind the digital experiences are being paid for their efforts building these apps. However, the Burning Man Project has given at least some of them perpetual licenses to continue operating these digital platforms with the Burning Man name and an option to monetize, though a percentage of proceeds will be kicked back to the organization.

While getting this event across the finish line by the end of the month is daunting enough, the Burning Man Project is also trying to consider how its rapid learnings will apply to next year, though they hope that the physical event returns for 2021.

Blumenfeld says he plans to spend the next year working on the background infrastructure so that items like gating and ticketing functions for a virtual Burning Man can all be centralized.

While having eight distinct experiences this year could complicate the goal of getting one big group together, developers concerned about troubleshooting their new apps or having a sudden influx of virtual Burners overwhelm their infrastructures view multiple entry points to the festival as a necessary logistical move. Organizers hope the diversity of options will keep things interesting for attendees.

“I think we’ve got a good mix, and part of it is, we want to learn,” Blumenfeld says. “What we’re trying very hard to avoid is being in Zoom meeting hell.”

Whether users are connecting via video chat or as avatars inside a large virtual world, the developers building Burning Man’s virtual experiences believe they are operating on the cutting edge of virtual interaction and that they are rethinking elements of modern social networking to create a virtual Burning Man where people will be able to form new social bonds.

“I’ve fallen in love with this idea that at some point in the future, some Ph.D. student in 300 years time is going to write a thesis on the first online Burning Man, because it does feel like an extraordinary moment of avant garde imagineering for what the future of human online interaction looks like,” Cooke tells TechCrunch.

Immersive chat startups have a very different vision for the future of voice

from Social – TechCrunch https://ift.tt/31Q0EGc Original Content From: https://techcrunch.com

[bentonpena]

Digitizing Burning Man

Digitizing Burning Man https://tcrn.ch/2PLSCc3

For decades, Burning Man has represented an escape from the current reality. An event for free-er spirits to rethink new age ideals inside a stateless entity where art, music and partying reign supreme on the desert plains.

Over the years, the Bay Area-founded event has dealt with an internal clash as the gathering has grown larger and attracted a heavy presence from Silicon Valley’s wealthy tech class, with tales of turnkey experiences, air-conditioned camps, helicopters and lobster dinners. Now, under the shadow of a historic pandemic, the organization behind the massive, iconic event is desperately working to stick to its roots while avoiding financial ruin as it pivots the 2020 festival to a digital format with the pro bono help of some of its tech industry attendees.

With just a few weeks before the event is set to kick off, the organization is bringing together a group of technologists with backgrounds in virtual reality, blockchain, hypnotism and immersive theatre to create a web of hacked-together social products that they hope will capture the atmosphere of Burning Man.

Going virtual is an unprecedented move for an event that’s mere existence already seems to defy precedent.

Burning Man is held in late August every year inside Nevada’s Black Rock Desert. For nine days, the attendees, who refer to themselves as Burners, fill up the desolate landscape with massive art installations, stages and camps. Attendance has been climbing over the past several decades, to the point that the federal government got involved, creating a more than 170-page report arguing why the event’s attendance should be capped. More than 78,000 people attended in 2019.

It’s an escape from society in a shared social experience that doesn’t seem to be replicable elsewhere.

Black Rock City irl. // Viaggio Routard (opens in a new window) / Flickr (opens in a new window) under a CC BY 2.0 (opens in a new window) license.

The Multiverse

Steven Blumenfeld became the CTO of Burning Man days before the org’s leaders publicly announced that, due to the COVID-19 pandemic, the physical event was being abruptly canceled and the team was going all-in on a virtual gathering. Though the serial CTO expected the position to largely involve crusty tasks maintaining the event’s media infrastructure, he soon was pressed to rethink the front-end of a sprawling event that’s decades old and steeped in lore.

“My first inclination is, ‘Great! Let’s go build a big 3D VR world blah blah blah… So then I spent the first two weeks looking at what I had for staff, what I had for time frame, and what we could actually do,” Blumenfeld says. “There was just no way. And you know, I actually still wanted to do it. I wanted a challenge… but the reality was it just wasn’t going to happen.”

Burning Man is a massive undertaking, with a particularly deep emotional hold inside San Francisco, where it was first held in 1986, and by extension Silicon Valley. It isn’t all that surprising that when the Burning Man Project announced the event was making the move to a digital format, there was a rapid influx of community input to help decipher what an on-the-grid virtual Burning Man might look like.

“We had 14,000 people tell us they wanted to contribute in some way to a virtual Black Rock City,” said Kim Cook, the org’s director of art and civic engagement. “Some of them said what they wanted to contribute was love; so that’s cool. We also had around a thousand of them say they wanted to do developer-type work.”

Some of the groups that reached out to the Burning Man Project were companies that were willing to build a Burning Man experience but wanted official branding present. Despite a precarious financial position, Burning Man’s organizers declined help from these sponsors, citing the org’s adherence to “de-commodification” — a desire to prevent corporate infiltration of the event, eschewing advertising, branded stages and corporate partnerships.

Turning away from the professional studios, Blumenfeld and others settled on a network of small indie teams filled with Burners that were willing to develop the official digital experiences for the event on their own time.

Image Credits: BLM Nevada (opens in a new window) / Flickr (opens in a new window) under a CC BY 2.0 (opens in a new window) license.

A new moment for social networking

Eight projects eventually emerged as official “recognized universes,” each taking drastically different approaches to what a virtual Burning Man should look like. While some focus their efforts on virtual reality, others add social layers to video chat or build 3D environments on top of existing platforms like Second Life or Microsoft’s AltspaceVR .

During the pandemic, revamped developer conferences and trade shows have been able to port keynote addresses or panels to a Zoom format fairly seamlessly, but there are plenty of elements of the Burning Man experience that the teams involved realize might be impossible to replicate with online platforms. The developers creating the event’s virtual worlds are determined to rethink the conventions of online social networking to ensure that Burners make new friends this year.

“The sense of awe and scale is tricky,” says Ed Cooke, who is building one of the official apps. “One way of explaining Burning Man is that it’s a state of mind that you access as a side effect of all the things that happen on the way there.”

Cooke, a London startup founder who also boasts the title of Grand Memory Master, earned for — among other things — memorizing the order of 10 decks of cards in less than an hour, has been building SparkleVerse with his friend Chris Adams, whose daytime gig is as a senior software manager at Airbnb.

Their web app, which pairs a 2D map interface with video chat windows, is primarily focused on advancing how shared context can facilitate and better frame social relationships.

Amid quarantine, the pair tells TechCrunch they have been creating deeply complicated video chat parties for their friends. One example is a moon-themed party where they created a clickable map of the lunar surface that guided the 200 attendees through 16 separate virtual spaces with their own themes. Before the party kicked off, the hosts walked people through the “experience of traveling to the moon” by guiding them through the effects of zero gravity and instructing them to play along with experiencing it. Another hot tub-themed party invited guests to jump into their bath tub before firing up Zoom.

Cooke and Adams are leaning on some of these mechanics to create a Burning Man theme, hoping that taking cues from immersive theatre will enable people to commit more deeply to the experience. The acts of driving, losing your phone connection and growing tired and hungry on the way to the physical event add to a “spaciousness in your consciousness” that allows people to act more freely, Cooke says. He wants participants to replicate these experiences by taking steps outside their normal life in the run-up to the event, whether that’s sitting through an obscenely long video chat session to simulate a drive to the desert or setting up a tent in their living room, or cutting off their water line and avoiding showers during the nine days.

“All of this is embedding you further and further into this distant context, miles away from your normal life, where effectively in the course of this, you’re just becoming a radically less boring person,” Cooke explains in a nine-minute video outlining the platform.

Many of the apps are building on the idea of how spatial interfaces can feed greater social context and make it easier to approach people and make new friends.

Another official app, Build-a-Burn, takes the idea of a stylized 2D interface for video chat even further with a sketched-out grayscale map of Black Rock City that users can navigate little stick figures across. As a user moves through different camps and their avatars get physically close to each other, new video chat screens fade in and users can gain the experience of venturing into a new social bubble.

A screenshot of Build-a-Burn

While Build-a-Burn and SparkleVerse are leaning more heavily on video chat, other experiences hope that creating massive 3D landscapes that match the scale of the real-world event will help people get into the spirit of the event.

Other than Burn2, which is wholly contained within the Second Life platform, most of the 3D-centric apps integrate some level of virtual reality support. Projects that support VR headsets include The Infinite Playa, The Bridge Experience, MysticVerse, BRCvr (which taps into Microsoft’s AltspaceVR platform) and Multiverse.

Each of the VR experiences will also allow users to join on mobile or desktop, an effort to ensure that the apps are more widely accessible.

Over on Extra Crunch, read about how a new generation of chat apps are leaning on game-like interfaces

Multiverse creator Faryar Ghazanfari, who runs an AR startup and previously worked on Tesla’s legal team, says that the motivations for building his app were a bit on the selfish side, telling TechCrunch that he became “extremely sad” after the physical event’s cancellation and felt the need to help build a place where he could reunite with his own camp.

Screenshot from a demo of Multiverse.

Ghazanfari tells TechCrunch he feels a responsibility in creating the environment that other Burners will experience; he says his chief concern is capturing the event’s complexity. Compared to the other apps, Multiverse focuses primarily on providing a photorealistic 3D playground where avatars can zoom around.

“As Burners, we don’t think of Burning Man as just a music festival or art festival; it is much more than that. Burning Man is a social experiment of creating a community out of a shared struggle,” Ghazanfari says.

Each of the Burning Man-approved apps seem to engage with evoking that shared struggle differently, which appears to be the most looming challenge of moving this event to a virtual format. While the apps hope to bring elements of the physical event into their virtual spaces, the creators also seem to realize that aiming to compete with attendees’ past memories is unwise. It’s a challenge that has been faced by dozens of startups in the virtual reality space over the past several years.

“I think the main challenge is taking something that exists in reality and then porting it into a different platform,” said Adam Arrigo, CEO of Wave, a venture-backed startup that initially launched a VR app for music concerts but has since shifted focus to mobile and desktop experiences. “When you’re in these digital spaces, the agency that you have as a user and the experiences you can create are so different than something that could exist, even at a concert.”

Image Credits: Burning Man 2012 Hawaii Savvy (opens in a new window) / Flickr (opens in a new window) under a CC BY 2.0 (opens in a new window) license.

Financial uncertainty

Perhaps the biggest unknown, as the organization readies for Burning Man’s August 30 start date, is that nobody really has any idea how many people are going to show up. While Blumenfeld pointed me to suggestions the entire digital event could attract up to 30,000 people over its nine-day run, Ghazanfari hopes that hundreds of thousands or millions of users will come into the fold of his experience.

Another point of contention internally is how exactly the groups plan to monetize these digital experiences.

In 2020, the standard ticket price for Burning Man was $475. The organization postponed the “main sale” of tickets prior to this year’s physical event’s cancellation, but they had already sold tens of thousands of tickets. Ticket holders will have the option of being refunded, but the organization has encouraged those who “have the means” to consider making a full or partial donation of the ticket price instead.

In 2018, Burning Man cost $44 million for the organization to produce, according to tax documents. The Burning Man Project reported about $43 million in ticket sales from that event, with other donations and revenue streams bringing the nonprofit’s total revenue for that fiscal year to about $46 million. In a blog post, the event’s organizers noted that though the group had event insurance, they were not covered for a cancellation caused by a pandemic. Burning Man Project says it has $10 million in cash reserves, but that it anticipates draining through that funding by the end of the year to stay afloat. The organization is listed as having received a loan from the federal government’s Paycheck Protection Program for between $2-5 million.

While some like Ghazanfari are pushing to make their experiences free to access with the option of giving a donation later, others expressed desire for a single digital ticket that would give attendees access to all eight digital experiences. Cooke says users will need to pay a $50 entrance fee to access the SparkleVerse.

The disparate nature of the experience being built this year — with some being shipped as native apps, others in HTML5 and others inside existing tech platforms — meant that a unified ticketing platform just wouldn’t work, Blumenfeld told TechCrunch. Not all of the developers were thrilled with this outcome, which they fear could fracture attendance at events on certain platforms. The biggest concern seemed to be ensuring that all of this effort pays off in some way for the organization so that they can continue to host the Burning Man event post-pandemic.

“One of the biggest reasons we’re all doing this is to help Burning Man survive, because the Burning Man organization unfortunately was really badly hit because of COVID,” Ghazanfari says. “The organization is in kind of a precarious situation financially.”

The organization has attracted criticism in recent years for the event’s inclusiveness. Some of the developers acknowledge that planning for a nine-day trip to the middle of the desert can be daunting and prohibitively expensive for people that want to join the community, and they hope that this year’s shift to a digital format will open up the event to more people and that these apps can be a less intimidating way for skeptics to get a taste of the community.

Image Credits: BLM Nevada (opens in a new window) / Flickr (opens in a new window) under a CC BY 2.0 (opens in a new window) license.

Thinking of the future

None of the developers behind the digital experiences are being paid for their efforts building these apps. However, the Burning Man Project has given at least some of them perpetual licenses to continue operating these digital platforms with the Burning Man name and an option to monetize, though a percentage of proceeds will be kicked back to the organization.

While getting this event across the finish line by the end of the month is daunting enough, the Burning Man Project is also trying to consider how its rapid learnings will apply to next year, though they hope that the physical event returns for 2021.

Blumenfeld says he plans to spend the next year working on the background infrastructure so that items like gating and ticketing functions for a virtual Burning Man can all be centralized.

While having eight distinct experiences this year could complicate the goal of getting one big group together, developers concerned about troubleshooting their new apps or having a sudden influx of virtual Burners overwhelm their infrastructures view multiple entry points to the festival as a necessary logistical move. Organizers hope the diversity of options will keep things interesting for attendees.

“I think we’ve got a good mix, and part of it is, we want to learn,” Blumenfeld says. “What we’re trying very hard to avoid is being in Zoom meeting hell.”

Whether users are connecting via video chat or as avatars inside a large virtual world, the developers building Burning Man’s virtual experiences believe they are operating on the cutting edge of virtual interaction and that they are rethinking elements of modern social networking to create a virtual Burning Man where people will be able to form new social bonds.

“I’ve fallen in love with this idea that at some point in the future, some Ph.D. student in 300 years time is going to write a thesis on the first online Burning Man, because it does feel like an extraordinary moment of avant garde imagineering for what the future of human online interaction looks like,” Cooke tells TechCrunch.

Immersive chat startups have a very different vision for the future of voice

Internet via TechCrunch https://tcrn.ch/2ZYuXbv August 12, 2020 at 05:37PM

[tsgaustintexas]

24 Hours With: VANNAGRAM & CO

Let’s get one thing straight, Emily Forsythe Shrode’s days are never dull. As the Owner of Vannagram & Co, her schedule is filled with events, styled shoots, client meetings, back-end logistics and much, much more. 

We first met over 3 years ago when we teamed up on an activation for Umlauf’s Garden Party and I was instantly impressed with her energy and enthusiasm (and her effortless style). When I learned that she and her husband, Jared, took a sabbatical to visit 17 West-Cost National Parks in #annathevanna, I officially knew I had to make her my friend. Not only is she an absolute ray of sunshine and a delight to spend time with, she works so hard to make sure everything is perfect and stress-free on your event day. 

As a new mom, she hasn’t slowed down one bit and is giving us an inside look at how she balances motherhood with the 24/7 hustle of owning her own business. For a daily dose of Emily and the Van Fam, follow Vannagram on Instagram.

5:30am | Wake up to our 8-month-old, Joaquin babbling in his crib. Hideout in bed until his chatting starts to turn into crying, grab a bottle from the fridge and feed him until he begins to doze off, until wake up numero dos.

7:30am | Roll out of bed and prepare breakfast for Joaquin. After what is *sometimes* a long night of interrupted sleep (ahem, an 8-month-old babe who rarely decides to sleep through the night!) this momma makes a matcha green tea latte to get me energized for the day! I used to go straight for the French press coffee, but have recently swapped it with matcha because it gives me more of a clean, caffeinated high versus the caffeine spike and crash that coffee gives. Plus there are loads of antioxidants! I typically make mine at home, but if I dare to venture out, Zhi Tea on the Eastside makes a mean matcha!

8am | Kiss Jared goodbye as he heads off to work! Make my daily to-do list, check emails, send proposals for inquiries that came through overnight, catch up on social media and prepare my Instagram post(s) for the day/week ahead. Right now we have a giveaway going on where we have teamed up with some local brands we love (shout out to YETI, Hotel Ella, Elizabeth Volk Design and Nine-Banded Whiskey) to give away a Texas-sized tailgate-themed prize package for the ultimate game day experience! Check it out on our Instagram and enter to win!

9am - 9:45am | Go for a run to accomplish three goals at once: clear my head for the day, train for the 3M Half Marathon that I am running in January and to get Joaquin to take his morning nap in the jogging stroller. My husband is the real runner of the family, I am just an amateur, but I have grown to enjoy it! I am more of a group workout class kind of gal because it helps motivate me (love my Mod Fitness workouts!) but I recently discovered the automated Couch to 13.1 app to help me train. It is much more manageable and motivating than just trying to go out and run on my own willpower.

11:30am | Arrive at June’s with Joaquin in tow for a lunch meeting with an event planner to chat design details for an upcoming wedding we have on the books. I don’t always bring the little one along, but he tends to be requested when a lunch is scheduled. Before I know it he’ll be walking and on the move, so he will definitely not be allowed to tag along, but I enjoy having him by my side for the time being. My favorite go-to dishes: if I’m being bad then the Fried Chicken Sandwich and if I’m being good then the Matzo Ball Caldo, but both always with their skinny cut frites! :)

12:30pm | On the way to my car, I pop my head in Lucy in Disguise to see if there are any new sunglasses or hats I might need to refresh our prop collection. They always have the most unique items in town!

12:45pm | Head back to the house to put down the babe for his nap. This means time for me to catch up on emails and return any phone calls I might’ve missed throughout the day.

2pm | Site visit at Hotel Ella to discuss where the bus will pull in on the lawn for an upcoming event and any inclement weather plans we need to put into place. We will be posted up this Saturday, October 13th for the last game of their Fancy Tailgate Series. Interested in attending and cheering on the Longhorns as face up against the Baylor Bears? Snag your tickets here!

Photo by Jake Holt

3pm | Second site visit of the day to view a fairly new venue, Springdale Station located on the Eastside next door to Friends & Allies Brewery. I am meeting up with the Executive Director of the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation, Central Texas Chapter to discuss having the Vannagram at their inaugural Backyard Ball event geared towards young professionals. This event will incorporate some of our cities finest restaurants, chefs, breweries and live music to raise money for a cause that is near and dear to my heart. We love working with our city’s non-profits to give back to the community that has been so generous to us! If you are interested in attending Backyard Ball on October 18th, you can purchase tickets here!

4pm | Life can’t be all work and no fun! So Joaquin and I head to the park to do his favorite thing: swing! I pop my earbuds in and hop on a work phone call with an event planner for a corporate event we have coming up to coordinate logistics and any creative ways that we can fully customize the bus to incorporate branding into their client’s activation. If we have an evening event, this would be about the time that I would load up the bus and head out.

5:30pm | If we don’t have an event, I begin to prep dinner while Joaquin hangs out in his jumper and watches me. Making dinner is something that I enjoy doing most evenings. I flip on music and get creative by either semi-following a recipe and adding touches of my own to it. Some of my favorite go-to local blogs I get recipes from are: Gourmamanda.com (who is doing a revamp of her website currently, stay tuned!), Camille Styles’ Recipe Files and The Defined Dish. These days I like to choose recipes that are quick and tasty with little clean up so I am a big fan of anything that can be made solely in a cast iron skillet or on a sheet pan.

Roasted Chili-Orange Salmon with Garlic & Green Veggies via Camille Styles 

6pm - 7pm | Dinner, bath time and bedtime routine for Joaquin! Jared and I take turns finishing up cooking our own dinner and getting Joaquin ready for bed. We tag team and one of us puts down Joaquin and the other one handles dinner so that we can eat at a semi-decent hour!

8pm | Finally sit down, eat dinner with the hubs and recap our days.

9pm - 11pm | Tackle any emails I didn’t get to earlier in the day, work on designing photo and GIF templates or putting the finishing touches on a custom backdrop that I am creating for an upcoming event. I always leave my more tedious design work for later in the evening when I can focus and not be distracted.

Vannagram at SXSW 2017 with LeCroix 

11:30pm | FINALLY time for me to kick my feet up and head to bed! Wash my face, brush my teeth and flip on my diffuser to put me right to sleep, errr until Joaquin decides to wake me up!