#i mean they’re saying it in a clumsy way but the point is perfectly valid

[communistkenobi]

why are people reblogging this post with darthflake getting dunked on those are all good societal examples of anti-intellectualism lol ?

[amatchinwater]

Pairing: Steo

Characters: Stiles Stilinski, Theo Raeken

Warnings: explicit sexual content, rough blow job, deep throat, cum eating, anal fingering, anal sex, cum as lube, possessive behavior

Words: 2562

Kinktober: Cum Play

Ao3 link Masterlist

---

Stiles isn’t really sure how he ended up here, to be perfectly honest. When the Alpha chimera texted him to come over, he was dead set on leaving him on read. But his body, betraying him since puberty, got out of bed and into his jeep. Now he’s sitting in Theo’s driveway at midnight, wondering what the fuck is wrong with him. 

It’s not like they’re mortal enemies or anything like that. But the chimera pack and the McCall pack are the flimsiest of allies. The only thing keeping them together was the prospect of defeating the Beast. Well, the Dread Doctors bit the big one before they could perfect their monster. So, there’s really no viable excuse left for the packs to like each other. Because it doesn’t erase Theo killing Scott, no matter how temporary. It doesn’t delete the memory of the now Alpha killing Josh right in front of Stiles. 

Every fact remains. Yet Stiles still showed up. Because he’s a masochist at heart. He loves pain and knows for damn sure that Theo will provide it. He’s never taken explicit care of Stiles, but he’s never been baselessly harmful either. Scraped knees when he shoved Stiles into the dirt because the human pushed him too far. A sore back from Theo slamming him into a wall because Stiles had the nerve to call the chimera’s bluff while flirting with him. Swollen lips and a bruised neck when he couldn’t fight himself anymore and let Theo make out with him in an empty hallway. 

But no matter what Theo did to him, Stiles enjoyed it. Though the chimera took his pain, other than the hickies, Stiles wore his marks with pride. Because all it took was an extensive shower and no one in his pack knew anything had happened. The scratches and bruises could easily be explained away from working on his jeep or his general clumsy nature. Because that’s the basis of the pain Stiles means. Theo isn’t something that he can just have. No matter how badly he may want the chimera. 

Well, have, yes. 

Keep? No. 

That doesn’t stop him from getting out of his jeep, walking up the driveway, and knocking on the Alpha’s front door. Stiles has no way of knowing if Theo actually cares about him or not. What his endgame is by sleeping with him. Heavily flirting with someone doesn’t mean that you want to be with them. Neither does wanting to fuck them. All Stiles does know is that at least for tonight, he wants the chimera. However much he can get.

When Theo opens the door, he looks relaxed as ever while the human is trying to calm down his speed racing heart. Moments away from having a panic attack from showing up here. Too many unanswered questions bouncing around his skull.

“I wasn’t sure you were actually going to get out of the car,” Theo smirks, opening the door further for the human to step inside. 

It’s a valid point. When Stiles pulled up, it wasn’t midnight. It was only eleven-thirty. He wasn’t sure if he was trying to talk himself into or out of being here. “I can still go back home,” Stiles retorts halfway through the threshold, opting for sarcasm to attempt to keep himself guarded. Aloof. Feigning nonchalance to not show just how badly he wants Theo.

The chimera’s hand wraps around his wrist, pulling him the rest of the way into the house. “I don’t think so,” Theo chuckles, closing the door only to push Stiles against it, pinning him with his body. “I’d hate for you to have wasted the drive,” is all the chimera says before his lips claim the human’s. He pushes his knee between Stiles’ legs, grinding into the space until the human moans through their kiss. Theo’s hands curl into his waist, “you certainly smell like you want to be here, sweetheart,” he says, nipping down Stiles’ jaw to lick at his pulse. 

“Don’t have to be so smug about it,” the human huffs, digging into the Alpha’s shoulders, kicking his shoes off. 

“Yeah, but you like when I’m smug,” Theo effortlessly lifts the human by his thighs, wrapping his legs around him. “Don’t you?” The Alpha nudges their noses together to make Stiles look at him, “you can lie if you want to, babe. I’ll still know the truth.”

Babe.

Stiles’ face twists at the way the name makes his heart skip a beat. “Shut the fuck up,” he whispers, slamming his lips against the Alpha’s. He knows the chimera loves to tease, but he can't handle pet names being thrown around without any backbone to them. 

Theo chuckles against him, but doesn’t bite back. Only slips his tongue into the human’s mouth, guiding them up the stairs. Stiles scratches at Theo’s back when the chimera sucks his bottom lip and bites it. Before he knows it, Stiles’ back hits the bed, the Alpha easily claiming his spot between the human’s legs. His hands fumble with the hem of Theo’s shirt, groaning in annoyance at his lack of coordination from his haste to remove the offensive garment. 

Snickering, the chimera breaks the kiss to help him take it off, removing Stiles’ as well. The human is in a haze when Theo’s lips find his again, kissing his brain cells away. Stiles barely even notices that the Alpha’s managed to get both of their pants off too. Left in only the thin layer of their boxers, the human whines at their erections rubbing together. The friction muddling his already fuzzy mind. It just feels too fucking good and Stiles doesn’t know what to do with himself. 

Good thing Theo’s more than comprehensive at the moment. Leaning back, the Alpha removes the boxers just this side of shredding them off. Utterly naked in front of the chimera, Stiles’ cheeks burn in embarrassment. Until Theo gently smacks his hands away from covering himself up. Growling, “so fucking pretty,” as his eyes flicker red. “Bet you’d look even prettier with your lips wrapped around my cock. That sound good, sweetheart?” Theo asks, lazily strokes his dick.

Stiles’ mouth fills with drool at the bud of precum from the action. “Fuck,” he chokes on the word, “yeah, yeah it does.” Watching Theo crawl over him with a smirk plastered to his face is a fucking sight to be treasured. The moment the chimera’s thighs are encasing his head, Stiles can’t help himself but to bite at the flesh. Theo’s thighs are a gift to humanity and should be treated as such if you ask him. 

“Open,” the Alpha’s mouth curls ever so slightly at the edges, pressing the head of his leaking cock against Stiles’ lips. Smearing the precum around, he growls softly, eyes searing red. “That’s it,” Theo purrs when the human opens his mouth, tongue flattened in waiting. Toying with him for a moment, the chimera taps his dick on Stiles’ tongue. "Pinch my leg if it's too much." His only warning before thrusting all the way to the back of the human’s throat. 

Tears prickle his eyes while Stiles fights the gag. It happens anyway and Theo pulls back enough for him to catch his breath before he does it again. And again. Fucking his throat with a fierceness that Stiles didn’t really know he’d like. But he is absolutely on board with it. Maybe a sore throat in the morning will be something he can have to remind him that this isn’t a dream. Though temporary, he can remember his time with Theo for a bit before tucking the feeling back into the shadows. 

Especially because the sound of Theo’s growled moans aren’t something Stiles is going to be capable of forgetting anytime soon. The Alpha thrusts get faster, haphazard. Filling the human with an intense need to have Theo cum in his mouth. Like yesterday. Stiles needs the taste to singe his tongue. He needs to know what Theo tastes like more than he needs air. So he tucks his teeth behind his lips and does his best to meet the chimera’s thrusts. 

“Fuck, Stiles,” Theo moans, fisting into the top of his hair. Stiles moans at the treatment, working overtime. “So, fucking, good,” he accentuates the words with harsh, pointed movements. But all too quickly, Theo pulls out of his mouth. Stiles gasps for air, watching with hooded eyes as Theo strokes himself until he’s covering Stiles’ chest and stomach with his cum. 

He said he wanted to taste it, dammit. It didn't even reach his chin. 

Stiles doesn’t even bother stifling his indignant whine. 

Theo lets out a breathless chuckle, “don’t worry, babe. There’s plenty,” he says. Hovering over him, the Alpha reaches his cum covered fingers towards Stiles’ mouth, “clean them up.” The human moans around the taste in his mouth, sucking the Alpha’s fingers gratefully. Theo’s free hand gathers more of his cum, reaching underneath Stiles to tease at the tight ring of muscle. Slick with his release, the finger slides inside with next to no resistance. 

It doesn’t even burn enough for Stiles to wince. Maybe it does, a little, but he’s too focused on cleaning off the chimera’s fingers to actually care. To be frank, the sinful squelch of Theo adding another finger echoes in his ears so loudly that he doesn’t hear whatever praise or light tease the Alpha had said. He merely bites down on the hand trying to leave his mouth. 

A harsh jab to his prostate makes the human cry out, releasing his hold on the Alpha who tuts, “don’t be greedy.” Theo grins, rubies burning brightly, “I told you, I have plenty. You’ll get all of it, promise.” The chimera rumbles in his chest, pulling his fingers out to lick them clean. 

Three to be exact. 

Stiles had been so distracted by the taste of Theo’s cum on his tongue that he didn’t notice the third being added. Or the feeling of the Alpha stretching him open. How the fuck did he not notice that? Is this just an addition to the pain he’s asking for? That the chimera is like a drug to him and he’s only going to crave him once he’s gone? Well, at least he’s going to enjoy the hell out of it while he has it. 

“Theo,” Stiles mutters for the sake of having something to say. Reaching out to grab for the Alpha. To his surprise, with the hand not aiming his cock at Stiles’ ass, he takes hold of the human’s hand, tangling their fingers together. “Dont,” he clenches the hand in his, the chimera teasing his dick at Stiles’ entrance. Poking the head in just to bring it back out. “Please, I can’t take it. Just- fuck,” he draws out the word on a lengthy moan, Theo pushing deep inside of him. 

“Fuck me, you feel good,” the chimera growls mostly to himself. Still holding his hand, Theo slams it on the pillow, using it as leverage to pull out to the tip and slam back in. A loud moan punches its way out of Stiles when the Alpha keeps doing it. Harsh thrusts that make starts burst behind his pinched eyes. “So perfect, Stiles. Warm. Tight,” the Alpha aims straight for the bundle of nerves, ramming into it with a purpose. 

With his brain so fuzzy with thoughts of only the Alpha, Stiles almost misses the chimera reach between them to rub his previous release into his skin. “What- fuck,” he groans, the lewd gesture shooting straight to his own neglected dick. Leaking and throbbing painfully against his stomach. “What are you doing?” 

“Marking you with my scent,” the chimera states simply, as if he’d told the human what the weather was like outside. But the possessiveness in his red eyes shines through, even to Stiles’ glassy, unfocused whiskey ones. “Rub my cum into your skin and then fill you up with it. That way everyone will know it was me you gave yourself to.” 

Stiles makes a strangled whine in the back of his throat, caught between loving the idea and being absolutely terrified of it. Not twenty minutes ago was he thinking about how he’d like to keep Theo, but doesn’t think he could given the situation of their packs. “What?” Is all he manages to breathe out, the chimera’s skillful thrusts to the bundle of nerves deep inside him killing all thought processing. 

“No going back now, sweetheart,” Theo grunts through his efforts. “You’re mine,” he snarls, thrusting faster than ever. Pounding into Stiles’ prostate and before he knows it, the human’s own cum splatters his chest and stomach, covering what Theo had just rubbed in. He screams his moan. “Look at you, cuming untouched. Yeah,” the Alpha scoffs his laugh, pulling back to the tip to slam back inside. “You’re mine,” Theo growls through his moan, filling Stiles with his thick, hot cum. “Can’t cover that scent, babe,” the chimera whispers against the human’s mouth. Kissing the final remnants of breath Stiles had. 

Sated and fuller than ever before, Stiles groans softly when Theo pulls out. Eyes too lazy to open, he assumes the chimera moving back is to get something to clean him off with. It isn’t until something brushes against his ass that Stiles realizes that’s far from the truth. Whipping his head up, the human watches the Alpha finger his cum back in his ass, not letting a single drop spill out. “You-” Stiles cuts himself off with a gasp, Theo leaning down to lick the human’s cum off his chest. 

Rumbling in his chest as he does, “gotta make sure it’s in there deep,” Theo brushes his fingers against his prostate. Stiles’ lungs betray him with another moan. His own dick twitching, trying desperately to be ready for more. He whines, pushing closer and closer to overstimulation the more the chimera lazily pumps his fingers. 

“Okay, sweetheart,” Theo kisses him softly, taking his fingers out and coming up beside him. “I’m done,” he growls, curling Stiles to his chest. “You smell more like me than I do,” the Alpha teases, tracing lines along the human’s spine. 

Stiles freezes, bliss melting away being replaced with anxiety, “but my pack-”

“Probably won’t take you back,” Theo shrugs like it’s nothing. “Not that it matters,” he holds Stiles tighter, the human jolting at his previous words. “Your place is here, Stiles. I’ve been telling you that since the beginning. If I were you, I’d get some rest,” the Alpha kisses his hair. “I didn’t leave a single mark on your neck and I plan to fix that,” Theo rumbles in his chest, “sleep while you can. Our pack will be here in the morning with much needed breakfast.”

“Our pack?” Stiles asks, mind reeling with every bit of information just given to him. 

None of it a question either. Not that it needed to be. Theo knows how to read him better than anyone. Like always. The Alpha merely told him the answer to every question he’d refused to voice for who knows how long. Probably since the chimera came back to town if Stiles allows himself a shred of honesty. Theo only hums in agreement. The reassurance has him curling closer to the Alpha’s chest, smiling at the approved growl it earns him.

[the-bugs-under-ur-skin]

Yandere Sunny, Basil and Mari w an affectionate reader HCs - Omori

nghgggggh so cute :,) also sorry to the one person who asked for clumsy and affectionate, i just didn’t think there needed to be two different posts about it. thank you guys sooo much! i’m so glad you like my headcannons!!

[yandere Sunny x reader]

-Sunny is one of the most touch-starved of the group

-affection was always a must for him, so you being extra affectionate on your own is basically heaven for him

-he gets very flustered by the sudden affection from you but never pulls away, just soaking it all in with a red face

-he’ll let you give any affections you want at any place

-he doesn’t care about other people and would be able to intimidate them if the did try to bother both of you

-Sunny is very happy that you’re okay with pda, and can’t help but have a proud smirk on his face whenever he catches people staring at the two of you

-he also finds the texts adorable

-he always gets a little blush in his cheeks whenever he gets the notification that you’ve texted him

-he has trouble falling asleep and waking up so the gm/gn texts he gets from you actually helps him feel better

-i think he’d be an awkward texter though, so don’t expect much more than a thumbs up emoji or an “ok”

-but please don’t get discouraged by the lackluster responses from him, those texts are some of the best parts of his day

-you’ve spoiled him at this point, he just expects you to shower him in affection and would throw a little tantrum if you were to suddenly stop giving it to him

-and if he throws tantrums just because he doesn’t get enough affection, he’d certainly get upset if you were affectionate with others

-even just hugging one of your friends as a greeting can get him angry

-if you’re ever just cuddling against your friends and wonder why they suddenly seem unnerved, it’s probably because they just noticed Sunny’s intense glare from across the room 

-most of the time if your friend just backs off, he’ll leave them alone (for the most part)

-of course, if they’re persistent than a few cuts should have them back off

-but no matter what, you’re not going to be chatting with those friends for a long while

-and if one of your affections you show to your friends is a kiss, however, it’s going to be more than just a glare and a punch

-like, it’s nice that you made such a nice friend but you’re definitely never going to see that friend again unless you’re going to their funeral

-he wants all of your affection for himself, even if you claim you have “so much love to give to everyone”

-he can handle any affection you throw at him, so don’t start being shy now!

[yandere Basil x reader]

-despite being very shy, Basil would be quite affectionate himself

-he hopes that you’ll let him hang off of you for the rest of time, because that’s all he wants to do

-any affection you give him, he’ll return, albeit shyly

-if you though Basil would absolutely obsess over an affectionate s/o you must be crazy

-it’s the validation he’s always wanted and he gets it through hugs and kisses from his favorite person? he’s perfectly ready!

-honestly, he would mind if you suffocated him from all the affection he gets from you

-he also gets really giddy whenever he receives texts from you

-you constantly texting him will never fail to make him blush; he absolutely adores that he’s on the front of your mind

-you aren’t bothering him at all! he always responds to any of your texts immediately and hopes that you send him even more

-he’ll basically have a meltdown if you suddenly don’t give him a goodnight text as usual

-and Basil will definitely get upset if you’re affectionate with others

-he thought that you were only affectionate with him because he’s special, and your just giving away your valuable attention to just anybody?

-he definitely sits and cries in his room or under a tree or something

-he’s so pitiful, wouldn’t you do anything to stop him from crying?

-Basil just really hopes that you and a friend don’t suddenly start catching feelings for each other 

-an affection s/o would also worsen his tendencies since he’s basically getting praised for being a toxic boyfriend

-not only will he get more clingy, he’ll also get slightly more manipulative

-i mean, since you love affection so much, why not give him some?

-you’re holding hands with someone else? but he thought you loved him! you know... if you want to break up with him you can just say so...

-but, you’re not actually going to do that right? PLEASE don’t do that...

[yandere Mari x reader]

-Mari was affectionate with you right when she started to have some sort of feeling for you

-even if you and her are still technically friends she is absolutely sure that this means you’re both in love

-it just makes sense to her; you’re both always hugging and sometimes even a kiss on the cheek? there’s no way that this isn’t love

-she’ll even talk to her family and friends about you like you’re both dating each other

-and don’t even get me started with the texts

-every time she responds she’s always adding a heart at the end or calling you “honey” or “sweetie”

-she’ll probably send even more texts than you do

-oh, you give her a little good morning text? that’s cute, anyway here’s this two paragraph long message about how lucky she is and how excited she is to see you this morning

-but, whenever you’re affectionate with others, this breaks Mari’s fantasy about you both being in love

-she was so sure you were absolutely dedicated to her and that you would get married to her after you both finally graduate, and you’re giving someone else a hug?

-honestly, even simple affection could ruin her so you being really affectionate with others will send her into despair

-at first, she’s mad at you

-she trusted you and you’re out here snuggling with another classmate? how could you!

-but once you start acting confused on why she’s ignoring you, it starts to click for her

-it was never your fault, it was your friends!

-she’ll apologize to you profusely and then go straight to whoever was “manipulating” you into giving them affection

-so don’t worry, darling! those awful people will finally leave the two of you alone forever!

[enderspawn]

op I am pleading for you to talk about c!Schlatt I keep getting interrogated for saying c!Schlatt was the best president and he really didn't do anything super terribly wrong please talk about him

i mean... im sorry anon but idk abt best PRESIDENT. manburg under schlatt.... kind of sucked imo JFKDLSJFKL

1. manburg had massive food shortages, to the point the average citizen (including fundy) had to eat spider eyes to survive.

2. he imposed ludicrious tax of his civillians (namely niki. we dont know if he did that to Every Business like w fundy or if he targeted niki specifically bc of her closeness to the ex-president, but neither is good)

3. exiled those who he saw as political opponents to keep his power

4. straight up ignored his cabinet a lot of the time to make his own decisions (such as destroying the white house, which led to quackity leaving)

5. was widely hated by all the citizens. literally at one point all the ppl left in manburg was schlatt and jack manifold (who was MIA on the server and left to found Manifold Land when he came back)

6. held a public execution, AGAIN without the consent or knowledge of his cabinet (IF I REMEMBER RIGHT. i know big q opposed the execution at minimum, but idk for sure if he knew it was planned at all before the festival)

7. was basically at war his entire presidency thanks to pogtopia's existence

and thats just what i can think of rn! the reasons i like c!schlatt are fully based around him as a character and HIS personal development, not around his policies or actions. especially when compared to the other two presidents, who either won or prevented a war and kept the majority of its citizens happier and healthier than Manburg, he's.... probably the worst president they had tbh

BUT since you gave me an excuse to ramble abt him anyway, i wanna go on abt what i DO like abt him (under a cut bc this post is already kinda long oops) but

tldr; i like schlatt bc of his relationships with others, his flaws and pitiable moments, and how he is a fantastic parallel/foil to the characters around him

I like his complex (and yes, abusive) relationship with quackity, especially after his death and quackity's feelings flipping rapidly between hating him and missing him. but before that they did have a honeymoon-esque period-- at least from quackity's view.

watching their date you get the idea schlatt mightve never really been interested in him and mightve just been using quackity's interest in him for his own advancement! but we dont know.

maybe he did truly love quackity in his own fucked up way in the end, even if he wasnt a good person. maybe he regrets his actions and cruelty. or maybe he doesnt.

in the end they were (like the animatic i linked said) "built from the same dirt", they're both incredibly ambitious and prideful people and parallel each other a LOT (see: q's need for power, his want to execute ranboo paralleling tubbos execution, etc). they're not good for one another, but i love seeing just how they fall apart together (i hope you die, i hope we both die kind of beat)

and.... god his relationship and impact w fundy i could ramble abt all day dude. fundy kept schlatt's sword after his death and calls it an heirloom. we dont know 100% how old fundy was when wilbur was exiled (i mena... he ran for president but current fundy is like 20something and tommy ALSO ran as vp at 16) but we can assume he was a late teen. his own father was gone, but schlatt... seemed to CARE. he showed him affection.

fundy's never truly felt like hes BELONGED anywhere (even the country his father said was all for him, he felt ostracized and made different by his fathers doting babying) and because of that hes always looking for a group to be a part of. hes a people pleaser (its part of why hes so easy for big q to get for las nevadas).

and schlatt GIVES him that feeling of belonging he deserves. hes a spy the entire time, yes, but he becomes conflicted about it as time goes on.

could schlatt just be using fundy and filling his head with empty praise? sure, i couldnt fault you at all for that interpretation, its perfectly valid. BUT, i dont think so. he seemed genuinely shocked to see fundy oppose him on nov 16th. remember, he didnt know fundy was a spy.

in that moment he realizes just HOW alone he is and always has been. and its a tragic moment: the last person he had, the person he himself mightve truly CARED about left him just like everyone else. he was alone, truly and fully. even his allies were only there out of obligation and bc of him paying.

he knows his health has been failing him. he cant even swim due to muscular issues but he refuses see a doctor about it because he refuses to let himself be seen as weak.

hell, one could argue that issue leads to his abraisive and abusive behavoir in relationships: he refuses to let himself be true and genuine to anyone, there always has to be a wall and a proud perfect persona. its part of why hes a great villain both in narrative and to watch as a casual fan: just like c!wilbur, he's playing an act.

hes a foil and a parallel to wilbur. both are men who hide their true selves behind a certain role or persona they feel they have to play while they hide their crumbling health (schlatt's more physical and wilbur's more mental). both experience their rise and fall. but wilbur isnt despised, even if he thinks he is, while schlatt isnt truly loved by anyone, even if he thinks he is.

most of all, their deaths couldnt be more different. wilbur went out with a bang. a large dramatic scene fit for a storybook, with a long monologue and cinematic final blow ALL made to fit how he saw himself in a story and simply filling a required roll. but schlatts death is practically overlooked (especially in comparison to wilburs death and everything else that happened that day).

he built his entire persona about being this massive, larger than life powerful guy but he died small, weak, and frail to his own failing body. its... pitiful, honestly. it doesnt feel fitting, it feels wrong. his life up that point demanded drama, but his death was nothing more than... an accident, almost. unintentional. clumsy. its fucking brilliant.

[wrenhyperfixates]

Loki Series Thoughts—The Variant

With the release of episode 2, I’m back with another analysis. Spoilers ahead!! This will be a combination of personal thoughts, theories, and objective analysis. This is overall, a positive review, so if you do not want to see that, I would not recommend continuing to read. I am however more than open to some friendly debate and discussion over any and all of the following points, whether you agree or disagree with them.

With all that being said, let’s dive in:

I feel gypped on the Holding out for a Hero fight scene. I mean, I liked how the scene was shot, especially with the whole loudspeaker thing (it set the mood very well), but where’s Loki fighting to that song?

Alright, I might as well address the elephant in the room: Is Loki OOC? Well, for my money, the answer is both yes and no. And I don’t mean to be wishy-washy; it really kind of depends on how you define OOC and/or who exactly you take this Loki to be.

What does OOC mean? To me, the literal definition of “out of character” would be the character acting in a way unlike they’ve been seen acting before. Likewise, according to Collins Dictionary it would be defined as “not typical of the apparent character of a person or thing.” Now, that’s a bit too black and white. What if you have a character in a new situation, how do you know how they’d react? By analyzing their past actions and seeing if they line up. And if you stop at this point and deem Loki entirely OOC, well you’re allowed to and that’s valid. I, however, would not say entirely is the word to use. Somewhat, yes, but not terribly and not inexcusably so. I’ll come back to this in a moment.

Who is this Loki? He’s the one right after the Avengers, of course, but he’s something different too. Think about it, the whole series is centered around how different choices can shape the very fabric of the universe. Wouldn’t it stand to reason that changes in Loki’s story would cause him to behave differently than what we’ve seen before? This is, in essence, a different Loki, albeit one who’s own narrative is shaped by a shared backstory with ours. It even says it on his jacket in big, bright letters: VARIANT. So while he shouldn’t be too dissimilar from the Loki we know, I do not think we can entirely look to the old to determine the new.

Now that we have that out of the way, we’re back to my somewhat noncommittal answer of the original question. Loki has some moments that seem OOC, but almost always has a (valid) reason for acting that way, both in and out of universe.

Loki’s OOC moments:

◦ The Renaissance Fair: And I by no means think this applies to his whole spiel. In fact, I think it was largely in character. What got me was “Which is absurd, because my people are, by nature, gullible fools. A trait that I, the God of Mischief, exploited time and time again simply by listening.” And then again, right after B-15 announces they are one unit away from red line. Though, my issue with the latter is how rushed it is. This could make sense because he’s worried about having time to finish his ploy. It’s a small thing to harp on for sure, though, for the point I am trying to make.

◦ In the hallway: This is where I think he’s most OOC. It feels rambley and pointless. More a desperate plea than a calculated last resort.

◦ With the librarian: I was hesitant to put this one in, but he seemed a bit unsure at points in his dialogue here. The inflection of his voice in the middle just sounded, like I said, unsure.

◦ The cafeteria (both times): More so in the first. The metaphor was, like Loki himself said, clumsy. But what I really think is OOC here is how excitable and obvious he is after Mobius concedes, “Not bad.” And the only thing on their second cafeteria chat is at the very end. His response of “I know” to being called clever, once again has an inflection to it that I would not typically associate with Loki—it’s too pronounced.

◦ Pompeii (beginning of scene only): Loki seems pretty flippant about the whole thing in the immediate moments after their arrival. (As an aside, I don’t think he’s necessarily unsympathetic here; he knows what happens and to keep himself safe and prove his point, he can’t branch the timeline.) To be quite honest, I think he might just be goading Mobius as he’s done to our God of Mischief many a time already.

◦ Before Roxxcart: He seems nervous, and his speech is a bit rushed again. Then again, this is something he wants—to be better. I’d think he’d be a bit more calm about it, though. Then again, with everything that’s happened recently, maybe it’s a natural response?

The reasons why he seems OOC:

◦ It’s on purpose: He knows what they think of him. If he plays into that, even in an exaggerated way, they’re not going to call bs on it.

◦ He’s been through a lot/Not our Loki: Like I mentioned earlier, not only is this a new environment, it’s a new Loki. He’s been shaped differently from our Loki because of how he was immediately thrust into the world of the TVA after many traumatic experiences.

◦ It’s an acting choice: No, it’s not one you have to agree with. But I believe Tom could be doing it to highlight moments where Loki is saying things he personally does not actually believe or that he knows others believe. Just to distinguish from the more calculated lying he does.

So, are there moments when Loki acts OOC? Yes. Is it inexplicable? No. Are the answers to those questions always the same from person to person? No, because like so many things, it’s all about how you frame it. And, of course, every person perceives each moment of time through their own eyes, with their own thoughts, in their own ways.

Loki has plenty of moments in character, too. In fact, I’d say he was overwhelmingly in character, for my understanding of it. In the earlier parts of the Renaissance Fair he is witty and lying with ease. At all other points that I didn’t mention, I found his vocabulary and inflection perfectly fine. I can’t think of any one moment his hand gestures particularly stuck out to me as out of place. And during his impromptu magic lesson, he seemed so sure of himself. He has snark without being rude. His interactions with “the variant” are on point. Even in the majority of the Pompeii scene, he’s not acting OOC, he’s just acting. He wanted to make an over-exaggerated splash to test his theory. Between that and speaking Latin, aren’t we seeing his cunning and wit?

Well, with that divisive and slightly negative topic out of the way, let’s move onto Mobius, his character, and his role in the show. He’s a bit different than the Mobius we see last time. Don’t get me wrong, there’s still moments where he seems to be manipulating Loki, or at least attempting to (the walk to the elevator; dangling a meeting with the Time Keepers in front of Loki’s face). In episode two, he’s presented as a victim. Mobius is just as much a slave to the “sacred timeline” as those living in it. He can’t go into the world and do the things he wants to do. Even any questions about time that Loki has, he answers seemingly by rote (perhaps drilled into his brain through propaganda?) or he can’t explain well (note, two times he somewhat hesitantly deems what Loki says as “an oversimplification”).

We’re also told that Mobius has a soft spot for broken things. That seems like a bold thing to say if Mobius hasn’t done something big before. Has he possibly ever used a variant like this before? Could he even possibly have a deeper connection to the rouge variant? Probably not on that second one, but it’s not wholly impossible. Though, going back to “has he done this before?” (and get ready for me to get absolutely insane now) do the rings on the table have deeper symbolic meaning pertaining to this? Yes, it could have just been for comedy, it may have just been a cool shot, but why put so much focus and emphasis on it like that with the camera and dialogue if it has no significance. Basically what I mean is, it’s symbolic of Mobius messing up. He messed up Renslayer’s table, maybe he botched a mission. Or maybe he even screwed up when working with another variant. Regardless of whether that’s symbolism, we do see him have a soft spot for the people at the hurricane shelter.

Mobius’s role in episode 1 was trying to break down Loki and recruit him. In this episode, he was more of a guide, more of a friend. Yes, there are lines like at Roxxcart when he says he knows he can’t be trusted, but there’s also a lot of camaraderie between the two. By the time Loki and Mobius are having their second chat in the cafeteria, they seem familiar with each other, engaging in what seems to be a friendly bout of verbal sparring. They seem, at very least, fond of each other, and I believe Mobius is, to some extent, on Loki’s side.

In fact, Mobius and Loki share something in common; they want something more than what the time keepers have preordained for them, even if Loki is more ready to admit that. Mobius is still, however, playing the part he’s been assigned, his “glorious purpose.” And, yes that includes some digs like that at Loki, whether Loki’s in the room or not, and whether they’re subtle or not. Is “I’ll delete him myself. He’s really arrogant.” really a dig though? I mean, it sounds like he could just be saying what Renslayer wants to hear. And when he talks about Loki wanting something more, wanting to change, I don’t think he’s actually talking about Loki. With the inflection and stage whisper, it almost sounds like he’s projecting. Remind you of anyone? Mobius will likely end up helping Loki, or may even turn into a tragic hero, his fatal flaw being his unwillingness to admit the TVA is not infallible.

The TVA workers. Isn’t odd how some of them have names and others don’t? Do they name themselves? More likely, I think whoever is in charge of a branch of the TVA gets a name, and all underlings get the less than human mix of letters and numbers with which to identify themselves. It also seems that the people with the most personality are the ones with names. B-15 has a personality, sure, but it’s more just in line with “I work for the TVA. This is what they want. I will do exactly that.” It’s almost lacking something that the named characters have lying beneath the surface of their character arc.

And then she gets enchanted, and if Wunmi Mosaku wasn’t already shining with the limited story for the character, oh boy she is now. When B-15 comes to, she is scared. It’s on her face and in that little shuddered breath. And when asked what happened, she seemed so unsure, timid. I’m definitely interested to see how that progresses!

Back to the workers in general, they didn’t seem as sad about their coworkers this episode as in the last. Even with C-20 it seemed to be a respect thing. I mean, they reset the timeline with their colleagues lying dead on the floor. I think in a lot of scenarios, dead soldiers would be given a proper burial.

Ravonna Renslayer and the time keepers. Renslayer is even more steadfastly devoted to the sacred timeline and the time keepers than anyone else. Why? Well, I think it’s because she is the time keepers. Any time they’re brought up, it’s quickly explained away with a simple “they’re busy.” That’s because they’re not real. But Renslayer sure seems chummy with them, huh? What other reason then its her timeline she has everyone protecting.

Then again, she may only be second in command, but not to the time keepers. (I mean, omniscient and omnipotent beings who are relatively aloof and unreachable? They’re perfectly set up to be revealed as not real. Plus the constant non-answers when it comes to them, I’ll be more surprised if they’re real than if they’re not.) But in the comics, her plot line is interwoven with that of Kang the Conqueror, a time traveler, among many other things. Even more likely than her being in charge, is him being in charge.

And now for the variant. It’s not Lady Loki, we all know that right? Ok, that comes off a bit harsh, but she is listed as Sylvie in the credits for languages other than English. This was also who Sophia Di Martino was previously listed as on IMDb. I won’t get into her story in the comics now, but I’d bet we’ll take elements of that in her story in the series. And if you’re still not convinced that’s who this is, why have her blonde? It just doesn’t make sense to change that about her. Plus, Sylvie takes on the name of Enchantress. What does Loki say her powers are? Enchantments. She doesn’t want to be called Loki either. She does say the main Loki variant is her, but if she’s framing him or taking on his persona for her crimes, why stop now? Her language is distinctly un-Loki like, too. She also boldly declares “This isn’t about you.” And finally, there’s the foreshadowing in Loki’s line, “I would never treat me like this.”

I only wonder what her motives are. Is she looking for revenge on the Loki from her timeline? Or perhaps she’s working fo him? Maybe he’s dead and she’s avenging him? Or he’s alive and she wants to grab his attention? Maybe she has motives all her own. And what of Mephisto? Does he actually play a part in this? I’m just spitballing, I need more information.

When Loki finds the file. No. Like. Give a detailed description of this please!!!!! He thinks he’s evil. That he causes all that death with malicious intent. Even if he doesn’t, there’s clear pain over the destruction of Asgard. And look at his eyes, the only thing we’re shown as he process the information fully for the first time. He’s hurt, confused. Disappointed and angry with himself. The bit we’re shown of his face before it zooms in on his eyes portrays this too. He looks so lost in that shot. And he looks to be tearing up a bit.

Maybe I’m just being dumb, but what does it mean 9,719 casualties? Didn’t they all escape? His face as the scene zooms back out is... defeated. Scared. Scarred. He’s barely holding it together. Then something else catches his eye, giving him an idea. And I’m sure more than anything he wants to be distracted from the storm in his mind. So yeah, he’ll happily throw himself into his work. The epiphany on his face as he’s still recovering and discovering new things is just so perfect too.

The confrontation at Roxxcart. This was really well done, I felt. Loki felt in character, and he was fighting smartly, using what he could. Because clearly the enchantment also lent Sylvie’s powers to the person. But Loki manages to hang in there and dig for information while keeping the battle going.

He gets mad, too. He starts yelling. And that makes sense. He wants answers, and for so long he’s been denied them; it’s a recurring theme in his life. He’s losing control of himself a bit here. And that’s a large part of the reason why he goes through the time door. Loki doesn’t want to lose control again. I don’t even know if it was exactly a betrayal of the TVA. I don’t think he’s on their side, but I think he just saw that he couldn’t lose the variant again. Because for what he says his plan is, he wouldn’t have followed the variant. However, he does because he wants answers.

What about that plan though? I’m working a bit in reverse with this scene I realize, but bear with me. That look on his face as he stands, it’s calculating. I think he’s lying about his plan. I think he’s trying to bring the variant in, not work with them.

Also, I’m so concerned for C-20. What’s real? I want to know!! But we’re already getting a feel for Sylvie’s powers. The people she enchants live, but they’ve seen something they’d rather not. What other reason is there for the similar way B-15 and C-20 act? And I know she mentions telling Sylvie the time keeper’s location, but really, it’s their location to her knowledge. It doesn’t necessarily mean they exist. Or maybe it’s just Kang.

And Mobius at the very end of this scene, the very end of the confrontation, the very end of the episode. The last thing is him calling after Loki. And he sounds genuine, almost. It didn’t sound like he was fearful for his own life, but rather more worried for Loki. Though, maybe I have that confused and it’s worried about Loki. Whatever the reason, it sounded like genuine fear in his voice to me.

Finally, some random thoughts that didn’t fit anywhere:

Gugu Mbatha-Raw is so talented. I mean, I got a lot of emotion from Renslayer. Confident and proper at the beginning, panicked and afraid at the end. Even in her talks with Mobius, there’s many subtleties to pick apart. I think it’s heavily implied through her words and actions that she’s evil.

The casual magic use was great. Hope there’s more.

Why do setting off reset charges in the main timeline have a different effect than setting them off in the branch timelines? Like shouldn’t it wipe it, not make branches?

Loved all the rapport happening in the episode. There was a lot of good dialogue.

Despite the manipulations going on, I like the relationship forming between Mobius and Loki. I think they make a nice little duo.

I love all the Loki variants we’re shown. Very, very interesting. Just give us Jötunn Loki for real, please.

Loki was very clever this episode, particularly with figuring out you could hide in an apocalypse and at Roxxcart.

Does Roxxcart have a link to Roxxon?

Their little motto thing is a bit creepy. “For all time. Always.” Sounds like it’s just part of their propaganda.

“You see, I know something children don’t. No one bad is ever truly bad. And no one good is ever truly good.” I love this line. Seriosuly, why not use this sound bite in the trailers? Loki himself is morally gray, and I love that we’re addressing this fact of life; the world is not all black and white, not all good and bad.

CASEY!!!

In the second cafeteria scene, there is a guard in full armor just standing there. I guess they’re monitoring the employees. How likely does whoever is in charge think it would be for an uprising of sorts to happen?

Between sleepy Loki, him putting that jacket on, his hair, that talking to himself and that annoyed little shh in the library, and just being the happy goof that he is deep down (Miss Minutes scene and salad metaphor) Loki was just so adorable this episode.

I think it’s important Mobius said sorry when talking about ragnarok. He knows Loki cares.

Mobius does kind of understand Loki when saying he has an “insecure need for validation.” He’s right, honestly, albeit harsh. But that’s all he wanted throughout the Thor movies too, not to be looked down upon. To be treated as equal. As worthy.

Of Mobius’s two options for why he’s sticking his neck out for Loki, I think they both hold some truth.

Interesting how TVA agents like to keep souvenirs from lives they can never live. Though maybe Renslayer keeps them for a different reason. Like from timelines that were particularly a threat to order—her order.

The score is still on point. Loving the theremin.

Wow an explanation pertaining to time travel I’ve found no holes in. It’s unstable and they have to enter in real time (furthest point on the branch) because of that. Ok, yeah. Checks out.

I’m so glad they kept the title card from last week. I like it so much better than the one from the trailers, and it fits the vibe of the show better.

Is it bad I want all these new branches to red line? I think it seems a little too early into the show for that to happen, but maybe a few of them will? Perhaps improbable but not impossible. But think of the chaos! What better playground for the God of Mischief than a universe thrown into disarray.

And now, my final thoughts. A very good episode with a mainly in character Loki. I like how we’re slowly learning more with what’s going on, while still keeping an element of mystery. Though, Marvel’s twists aren’t landing as well as I think they were hoping (assuming I’m right of course. I’ve seen plenty of other people who were thinking along the same lines though, so). It’s lacking a certain je ne sais quoi that Glorious Purpose had, but I still enjoyed it. Overall, 8/10. Let’s just hope my rating doesn’t go down point with every episode.

Like something I said? Totally disagree? Really want to talk more about one point? Whatever it is, I’d love to hear! Reblogs and comments are appreciated. My ask box is always open, and anon is always on. I look forward to hearing your thoughts! Thanks :)

Me, after not liking one, but two episodes:

[nose-bandaid]

the trees, the grass, the stars

Hi tiny!! I've been reading your stuff... and I love it 🥺 I'm a sucker for royal AUs and the masquerade one with Shinwon was lovely, I was wondering if I could request a Royal AU with Wooseok? I like the idea of rebel prince/princess!! But you can write whatever you like💛💛

Prince!Wooseok x (gender neutral) Reader | royal AU fluff + a little bit of comfort? | 2k words

synopsis: getting engaged to someone you barely knew, getting lost in the forest and tripping over a talking stump. none of it made sense, and yet they all added up to one of the greatest meetings in your life.

a/n: hihi !! @raspberrymuffings​ this is for you<3 prince wooseok hgngngn i loved writing this, sorry it ended up getting a little emotional, idk that’s just a habit of mine LOL, but i hope you enjoy:)

image from pinterest !!

=====

Did you mean to get lost? Of course not. You swore you saw something flash in the forest nearby and decided to follow its trail. That was it. A little curiosity never hurt right? 

Though it turned into an unintentional adventure when you traveled a little too deep into the woods.

Were you upset that you were lost? Not particularly. Being lost meant that you were away from the party and even better, you had a valid excuse to be absent.

Was it a big deal that you weren't at the party? Perhaps, because the whole purpose was supposed to celebrate your engagement with some prince from a nearby kingdom. The two families had finally decided that they wanted to come together, and they decided that the best way to do that (supposedly) was to have the two heirs married. 

But yeah, to you, it was still just a prince from a nearby kingdom because you've literally never met this man before.

Sure, you knew of him. That his name was Jung Wooseok, that his parents frequented your place for dinners. You've seen him milling around the town square sometimes — it's hard not to notice him when he towered over pretty much everyone else. And you’d say he was pretty good looking, if you had to give an answer, though you were usually distracted by the fact that his actions were the embodiment of youth. Last time you saw him, he sprinted by with 10 baguettes in his hands as curious whispers and frightened shouts followed him. They didn’t stop the boy in the slightest bit.

So hopefully this Wooseok was a really good guy, or else you'd had to do some major convincing to get yourself out of the engagement.

But that wasn't the concern right now because you were truly, genuinely, very much lost at the moment. You were certain that you've passed the same tree almost six times by now and all the mossy stumps looked the same.

You’ve never explored the forest on your own before, and now you regretted all the missed opportunities you had to play outside with the other children when you were little. Instead you thought your studies were more important.

You bit back a yelp when you tripped over something and almost face-planted into the tree in front of you.

"Ouch."

That was not your voice. That was most definitely not your voice.

The ground does not talk, the ground does not talk, the ground does not talk.

"The ground does not talk..." You whispered the mantra to yourself and dared to look down.

Your eyes followed the pair of shoes up to the mysterious man's face. His eyes bore right into yours and you finally came to terms that he was, in fact, laying on the ground, white suit and all.

"What?"

"Geez, I really did think that no one would bother me here, but I guess I was wrong." He sighed and rubbed his neck, bending his legs to make more room for you.

"What are you doing on the ground? In the middle of a forest no less?" 

He held a hand up and began lazily counting on his fingers. "Resting, relaxing, thinking... sleeping."

You didn't even hear his answer when you scanned his face once more and realized why he seemed so familiar. "Aren't you my fiancé-to-be?"

"I suppose so." He got up, brushing off the leaves that had fallen onto him and you wondered just how long he had been laying on the grass for. He then held a hand for you to take and he bowed. "A pleasure to meet you officially, my name is Wooseok"

"Likewise, I’m y/n." You replied and pondered over your next question before deciding that you didn't have to filter yourself so much in front of him. "Don't you care about your outfit? You have a party to attend."

"I could just get someone to clean it or replace it." He answered nonchalantly without missing a beat.

"So that's what it's like to be rich, huh." You deadpanned. "No pressure to keep an image? Lucky."

"Oh, I'll probably get scolded like hell when I get back, but I couldn't care less about my image. The only time I did was when I had my portrait done. They painted my eyes perfectly, and that's all that matters." Wooseok mentioned that last part haughtily.

"You do have nice eyes...." You admitted quietly, though you quirked your eyebrows at his odd fixation on that specific memory.

"What was that?" He teased way too obviously.

You decided to humour him and repeated, this time a little bit louder. "I said you have nice eyes."

He blushed and you watched him lick his lips in nervousness. It's as if he wasn't expecting you to give in so easily and you took note of that. You could definitely take advantage of his true shyness in the future.

"Th-thanks." He stuttered and you laughed. In the distance, you heard cheers coming from the party and the music started up again. Food must’ve been served.

You looked at Wooseok and tried to break the awkwardness. "I take it that you don’t really want to be here either. How long do you think we have until they come to hunt us down?"

His eyebrows furrowed as he went into deep thought. "28 minutes, on the dot."

You tilted your head. "And how are you so sure?"

He dropped a hand onto your shoulder. "Just trust me on this one."

You pursed your lips but didn't argue with him. "And what should we do during those 28 minutes?"

"I don't know about you, but I don't mind getting to know you better. At least, as much as I can, before our families force us to kiss in front of the crowd or something." He threw that out casually as he stretched (it was the truth, after all), but his voice wavered a little.

"True that..." You replied softly. The atmosphere grew a little awkward again as he kicked around the stones near his feet in silence.

"What were you doing before I tripped over you?" You asked to strike up yet another conversation and he let out a laugh at your question.

"I was looking at the stars."

"The stars?" You echoed as you strained your neck to look at the decorated sky. It wasn't often that you got to be outside at night, much less all alone, and you quickly realized how much you've taken the stars for granted.

They were beautiful.

"Yeah." Wooseok let out a huff as he returned to the ground to lay on his back again. He patted the spot next to him. "Want to join me?"

"Sure..." Your voice dwindled off when you touched the damp grass and then looked down at your outfit. There was no way you're going to get out of this without staining the fabric and you paused at those thoughts. What's a good excuse for a bunch of grass stains on your back? Would a clumsy trip cover it?

Sensing your hesitation, the other sat back up and began taking off the white coat that covered his suit. He then settled it onto the empty spot beside him. "Here, you can use this. I really couldn't care less about the stains, but I know you still got a reputation to hold."

"Unfortunately, I've already lost mine." You heard him quietly add to the side.

"Thank you, I appreciate it." You said.

He was a tall boy, so it made sense that he also had a long coat and you never would’ve thought of the benefits of that fact until today. Though it still wasn't enough to protect your entire outfit, it was sufficient damage control and you reasoned that you'd be able to come up with some kind of excuse for the few, inevitable stains.

For a while, you both laid on the grass in silence, watching the stars and occasionally putting the music history drilled into your minds to the test, naming the new song each time the band at the party switched pieces. The conversation then drifted back to your hobbies and you listened to Wooseok talk about his stargazing again.

He pointed a long finger at the sky and you tried your best to follow his gaze. "That's Aquila over there. Its brightest star is Altair. That one."

"I honestly have no idea which star you're pointing at, but you sure know a lot about stars." You commented lightly.

"I have a friend who loved space." He chuckled. "He always wanted to be an astronaut and wouldn't shut up about it. Then he got caught up in all his 'princely' duties and suddenly disappeared with his studies." He hummed. "I wonder where he is now, probably looking at the sky the same time we are. He always likes to keep his habits a secret."

Your expression softened at his wistful tone. "Maybe one day you could visit his place and see how he's doing? I could come with you if you'd like, keep some company. It could be another adventure, invite him along with us."

"That'd be nice. I think you would be good friends." He clicked his mouth and you waited for him to say more.

"You ever feel like everyone's growing up and you aren't?"

"Definitely." You replied.

"I know I'm immature, that's a well-known fact about me, but it's really because I'm clinging onto the childhood that I feel like I missed out on. All those classes and formalities, looking out the window and watching other kids play — why couldn’t I do those things too? Now that I'm all grown up, I have the freedom to do whatever I want, but suddenly all of my friends have turned into the person I was when I was little. They're grown up and stocked up on responsibilities and it feels like I missed out on my only opportunity to have fun..." He trailed off and cleared his throat.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to put that load onto you so suddenly. All this thinking has, well, got me thinking, I guess. And the fact that I'm getting engaged today is a little off-putting, no offence. It's a big responsibility and I worry that I'm too immature to commit to it." He let out a deep breath and waited for your answer.

You never really thought about your life that way until you heard Wooseok put it into that perspective. Perhaps it’s because you’ve always begrudgingly busied yourself with your royal duties, but you suddenly found yourself agreeing to everything he said. The two of you were more similar than you initially thought, now that you've witnessed what's underneath his childish persona.

"If it makes you feel better, I understand what you're saying." You didn’t know why, but you felt the need to whisper. "I couldn't care less for titles, sometimes I wish I could live life as a normal person. Sounds more exciting."

Your conversation was interrupted by someone shouting your name, followed by Wooseok’s. That shout was followed by several more from different voices and you perked up, realizing that they were beginning their search for you. It must've been time for the actual highlight of the party.

Had it already been 28 minutes? That went by faster than you would’ve liked.

"They're finally coming for us." You looked over at Wooseok. 

All of the downcast emotions he was pouring out before were absent and a small smile was planted on his face instead. He took one of your hands into his and planted a soft kiss on the back of it. 

"How about we run away?" He suddenly suggested, and you choked at his words, not even having the chance to wrap your head around the fact that he kissed you. Even if it was just on the hand.

"You want us to run away?"

"Like not, run away, run away. I'm not going to pull a Romeo and Juliet on us, but we should mess around for a little while longer; get them to chase us." He smirked. "It'll probably give us about an extra five and a half minutes or so."

"You seem to be really confident with your numbers." You responded, hesitantly standing up to return the jacket which he slipped on without a second thought.

He shrugged. "If I sound confident enough, eventually someone will come along and believe me."

"Are you implying something here?" You laughed, appalled at his impudence.

"Maybe." He cheekily smiled and you felt your cheeks heat up. You couldn't tell if it was because of his jab or because he looked quite stunning under the moonlight, hair dishevelled and clothes stained.

The shouts got louder and the music stopped, but you ignored them and continued to laugh.

"Alright then, Sir Wooseok," You held a hand out to help him off the grass.

"Lead the way."

[ssidesblog]

we should just kiss like real people do

logince, 1,787 words, ao3 

cw: underage drug use (they’re smoking weed together so nothing horrible)

Logan looked over to the alarm clock Roman kept on his nightstand. The red numbers read 1:47am. He slowly turned his head over to Roman, who was using his phone’s flashlight to see his tools: a little baggie of weed and a red pipe. His hands were shaky and his eyes squinted. 

“You’re not packing it right.” Logan said, crawling over to take over for him. 

“Shut it, nerd, I’m doing it perfectly.” Roman said as he pulled it further away from Logan. 

“You're at fault if you find shit in your carpet in the morning.” Logan crossed his arm and leaned back against the foot of Roman’s bed. 

“Here.” Roman held the carb and held the end to Logan, “I’ll light it for you.” He smiled lazily and Logan couldn’t help but smile back. He pressed his lips to the end and Roman lit the bowl. Logan breathed in and smoke entered his lungs. He pulled back and the smoke exited his parted lips. Roman quickly brought the pipe to his own and took a deep breath. He slowly lowered the pipe and leaned over to Logan. He quirked a brow. Roman opened his mouth and blew the smoke directly into Logan’s face, making him squeeze his eyes shut. Roman laughed followed by a coughing fit. 

“That’s what you get, asshole.” Logan said and threw the water bottle they’d been drinking from in his direction. He sipped a bit and swallowed. He stuck out his tongue in a show of disgust. 

“I think I’m literally going to cough up a lung one of these times.” He twisted the bottle close.

“That would be disgusting and I believe it is impossible.” Logan commented. 

“Joke about a common figure of speech, dude. You call me a dumbass for being pretty stupid yourself.��� 

“Fuck off, I’m not stupid.” Logan said and he hoped Roman couldn’t hear the genuine hurt in his voice but by the way his gaze softened he did. Maybe he is glad he noticed. 

“I’m sorry, you’re right, I’ve never met someone with a mind like yours.” Logan’s face was sent into a blush. He pointed his head down. 

“I’m sorry as well, you’re not a dumbass, Roman. You are actually quite smart,” Logan said, “Just in your own ways.” 

“That just means I’m stupid.” Roman said and fiddled with his hands. 

“No, no. I’m serious, Roman,” Logan grabbed his hands, “You look at things in such a different light then I do, and sometimes, though I would never admit this under normal circumstances, I need your creative mind. You add a completely new perspective to things and show me solutions I would never be able to think of on my own.” Roman smiled and Logan felt his heart speed up. 

“You have a way with words. I should give you more credit.” Roman said. 

“I’m not quite as good as you when it comes to flowery language.” Logan said sheepishly. 

“I always forget how sappy you are when you’re high.” Roman laughed. Logan rolled his eyes and finally drew his hands away. 

“Be grateful while it lasts, I know you thrive off the validation.” Logan finished with a smirk. 

“Ok, no need to come for my neck like that.” Roman said.

“Calling you out is fun. You’re so easy to piss off.” Logan said as he tilted his head to look at his ceiling. Roman made some kind of offended noise and said something but Logan wasn’t paying attention. 

“I can’t believe you still have those stars.” Logan whispered. Roman looked to where Logan’s eyes were focused and his face softened. 

“Do you remember the day I got those?” Roman asked. 

“Yes, we made a whole day of decorating your ceiling.” 

“And the reason it took all day was because somebody insisted they had to be placed to make actual constellations, even though they have almost all fallen off.” Roman said and knocked shoulders with Logan. 

“I still stand by my choice. One, it looked beautiful and two, we spent the whole day together.” 

“I miss being kids.” Roman sighed, longing. 

“We are still kids.” Logan corrected. 

“We’re 17, Specs, we may as well be adults. We can watch mature rated movies, that means we’re officially not kids.” Roman corrected Logan’s correction. 

“You are impossible.” Logan said and turned his head to look over at Roman, who was already staring at him. 

“And yet you’ve stayed with me this long.” Roman smirked. 

“I could leave at any time.” Logan threatened, no real intent behind the words. Because he knew he couldn’t. Not when Roman was looking at him like that. 

“And here you are, in my bedroom, talking to me the same as if we were 10 again.”

“Not quite the same, I do not think we ever got stoned at the age of 10.” Roman laughed and Logan smiled. 

“You got me there, Lo” Roman said, putting his head on Logan’s shoulder, “ You got me there.” 

They sat and worked on finishing the rest of the weed in the bowl. Music played from Roman’s speaker, not loud enough to wake Remus but honestly it would take a lot to wake that beast from his slumber. Roman’s back was pushed against Logan’s chest and Logan’s chin rested on top of Roman’s head. 

Logan liked nights like these. Contrary to popular belief, Logan enjoyed Roman’s company. They’d been best friends since childhood and worked despite their differences. They argued, fought, and pissed each other off, but Logan knew his life would be incomplete without their constant back and forth. Without Roman, Logan’s life would be boring and devoid of light. His chest aches and he holds Roman a little tighter. He moves his head so that his face is where his chin once was, his glasses push to the top of his own head. Roman pushes his head up like a cat does against a hand. Logan breaths out a sigh that speaks more emotion than words ever could. He lifts his head and places his chin back to where it originally sat. 

“Roman,” Logan spoke to the empty air, “How would you describe the feeling of being in love?”

“Getting a little deep there, Specs.” Roman said with a laugh, passing the pipe back to Logan. He took it and pressed it to his lips for a while. Smoke billowed out his mouth, followed by a couple coughs.

“I am simply curious. You’ve had more experience in that area than I have.” He handed the pipe to Roman, who tapped out the ashes that filled the bowl in the ashtray next to his legs. He lied down on the floor and motioned for Logan to follow, to which he complied. 

“Being in love is weirdly beautiful” Roman started, “There’s so many different ways to show how much you love someone. Through the way brushed hands can send a shock to your whole body, a kiss on the forehead that tells you you’re safe and cared for. Love feels an awful lot like home and expressing that is so hard.” Logan was turned on his side, watching Roman speak. 

“How do you know you’re in love?” His voice was soft.

“You’ll notice little things. How you stare at them a little longer than usual because their eyes are just begging to be looked into. The way you always want to be around them, interacting in some way. How you never tire of their voice, a melody stuck in your head and this time you don’t mind and you’d do anything to hear him talk. And it doesn’t take much to rile him up, even though his tone is annoyed underneath you can hear the gentleness, the fondness that he tries to keep hidden.” They were so close now, their faces only inches apart. 

“Roman.” A pause 

“Yes?” A breath. 

“I think I may be in love with you.” A smile. 

“I know.” A movement. 

Roman’s lips were soft and tasted like his strawberry chapstick. His breath reeked of weed but Logan couldn’t say his was any better. Logan noted that the movies were wrong about kissing. There were no fireworks or sparks, instead it was clumsy and the angle their bodies were at made it hard for their lips to more than graze. Logan shifted so that he was leaning over the other boy and lifted a hand to plant near Roman’s head. He deepened the kiss and he could feel the smile Roman tried to suppress. In turn Logan smiled and lifted his head slightly, taking in Roman’s face. His eyes were droopy and glossy but the brown shone like honey. His smile was gentle and knowing and red and swollen. Logan’s eyes teared up because-

“You’re so pretty.” Logan spoke as a tear fell down his face and landed on Roman. Roman quickly sat up and pulled Logan closer. 

“Why are you crying?” He asked, hands rested against Logan’s face. 

“Because you’re the loveliest person I’ve had the pleasure of knowing and you love me.” Logan’s voice was higher than usual and he knew he was sobbing but right now he didn’t care, because Roman’s eyes were full of a tenderness he has never seen before and all of it was directed at him.

 Logan leaned back in and kissed him. He tried to show how much he was feeling through this action; he couldn’t feel more right, as if his life was leading up to this moment, as if Roman was always meant to have his arms around him, his hands were made to run through Roman’s hair. Roman parted their lips and Logan, despite himself, let out a noise of complaint. Roman only laughed and Logan could never be upset when such a noise graced his ears. 

“You are just too cute.” He could hear the smile in Roman’s words. 

“Not to inflate your ego even more than I have,” Logan said, resting his arms on the other boy’s shoulders, “But I have never wanted to be with somebody more than I want to be with you right now.” Roman’s smile was enough to make Logan cry again but he willed back the tears. Roman kissed his face all over, making him giggle like a schoolgirl. 

“I have never been more honored.” Roman said and placed his forehead to Logan’s. 

“As much as I want to continue kissing you, I think we should sleep.” Logan said, eyes already closed. 

“I think you’re right.” Roman said, standing and pulling Logan up with him. He led him to the bed and pulled him down with a laugh. Logan shuffled closer and placed his head on Roman’s chest. 

“Goodnight, Specs.” 

“Good night, pretty boy.”

[impalementation]

I think your take on Doublemeat Palace is interesting because to me it's emblematic of all the things that make Season 6 (particularly the back half after "Tabula Rasa") not work for me. It's relentlessly grim and unpleasant and I can feel the writers twisting the plot to make sure every character is as miserable as possible. I'm not opposed to seeing protagonists in a low point or even outright failing. Season 3 of Game of Thrones is some of my favorite TV ever. (1/2)

(2/2) But at a certain point the grim and gritty, if it's not well written, and broken up with some moments of lightness (like Buffy was previously known for) the audience gets numb. It also doesn't help that no one has any agency. (Magicrack, the not!wedding, Dawn doing zip) Again, I'm not opposed to dark plotlines. I'm opposed to incompetent writing.I don't think you can call an episode or an arc "objectively" good if it doesn't work for the majority of the audience it's been written for. 

 you know, i’m going to disagree about the “grim and gritty” thing. doublemeat palace actually stands out to me as being really funny. and for having a lowkey positive ending. true, the episode is about the soul-sucking prospect of having to do the same dreary work every day. it’s about how much it sometimes sucks to work, which is why you have willow dealing with the fact that recovery is a difficult thing that you have to decide to commit to every day, xander and anya facing the fact that marriage is also a lifelong daily commitment, and buffy taking an unpleasant and mechanical job in order to put food on the table (and the episode plays up that the managers have been doing it for five or ten years). but like, names like “manny the manager”? the weirdo robotic people? the exaggerated camera angles? the swirling cow and chicken? buffy’s constant attempts at jokes? “hot delicious human flesh”? a little old lady with penis monster on her head? this stuff is totally absurdist. i think of doublemeat palace as almost the opposite of episodes like once more with feeling and tabula rasa, where things superficially seem fun but are actually quite dark. doublemeat palace seems superficially unpleasant but actually has a wicked sense of humor. and i say that the ending is positive because it involves both willow and buffy committing to doing work. they’re faced with the opportunity to “cheat” at life like the trio, who steal money instead of having jobs, but ultimately decide to do the right thing. willow doesn’t accept amy’s magic and buffy doesn’t blackmail the company. 

that goes for a lot of season six, in my opinion. even late season six. people say there was less humor, and i think that’s true to an extent, but honestly i think it’s more that the tone of the humor changed. it got more sardonic and absurd, but was definitely still there. eg people think of seeing red as the episode where the two Very Bad Things happened, but outside of those scenes a lot of the episode is like, fascinatingly (to me) slapstick (the whole jetpack bonanza? “say goodnight bitch” “goodnight, bitch”). and has that really lovely conversation between buffy and xander at the end. in general, i think a lot more season six episodes have positive endings than it gets a reputation for. i already mentioned the ending of doublemeat palace. but the end of gone has buffy saying she doesn’t want to die, the end of older and far away has buffy deciding to stay home with dawn, the end of as you were has buffy deciding to break up with spike, and the end of grave has buffy, willow, and spike all making important changes for the better. as in, season six can be very dark, yes. but i would not call it a hopeless or cynical kind of dark. it’s about the characters clawing their way out of that dark place. not just a statement that “adulthood sucks.” you can argue that the season didn’t pull off its attempts at lightness, but i very much think they’re there. 

at any rate, i agree to an extent that if a work of art isn’t working on most people, that’s probably a sign it’s doing something wrong. but i’d offer the counterpoint that you might also say that if a work of art really works on some people, even if not everyone, it’s probably doing something right. as far as the season as a whole goes, i’d actually take issue, on a basic factual level, with the claim that it didn’t work on the majority of people. not to validate IMDB’s ratings for buffy’s episodes, but it does have an n=~2000 sample size and if you average out the ratings by season, season six doesn’t rank starkly lower than any other season. it’s on the less popular side, but it still hovers around an 8.0 average like most of the other seasons. moreover if you go by the big r/buffy polls (n=~120-310), season six ranks in the top three favorite seasons every year they did one (2011: 3 > 6 > 2, 2012: 6 = 3 > 5, 2013: 6 > 3 > 5, 2014: 3 > 6 > 5, 2017: 5 > 3 > 6). you can see the data for yourself if you scroll down to where it says “surveys”. perfectly possible that there’s data that paints a totally different picture. this is just what i had on hand. that ranking also doesn’t mean the majority of people liked the season, but it does act as evidence that there are a lot of people whom it really worked on. basically, i wouldn’t say that season six is disliked so much as it’s divisive. people seem to either love it or hate it. with a smaller percentage that likes it, but for whom it isn’t a favorite. or who appreciate what it was trying to do but don’t think that it succeeded. 

as far as doublemeat palace goes i notice a similar phenomenon. people either really hate it or they really relate to it. either they think the style is bizarre and annoying or they think it’s delightfully surreal. so it really seems like it’s up to the individual whether they want to lend more credence to one audience reaction or another in order to assess quality. 

which is why i tend to use my own rubric. when i ask myself whether something is good or bad, i pay a lot of attention to (1) is the work trying to do or say something specific? (2) how unusual or challenging or astute is the thing the work is saying? (3) how coherently is it doing that, and on how many different levels? (4) on a formal level—dialogue, cinematography, costuming, acting, pacing—how fluently was it executed, and how well did the formal choices contribute to the ideas in (1)? 

for the record, i don’t think that doublemeat palace is the best episode ever. i just think it’s solid, and fits nicely into what i think the season as a whole was doing. but the reason i say that it’s “objectively” solid according to my personal rubric—which granted, you’re more than welcome to not share—is that (1) it has a pretty clear idea that it’s exploring. the drudgery of work stuff that i mentioned in the first paragraph. moreover i think that idea is really relevant to the season-long topic of “what makes it feel like adulthood sucks”. buffy having to take a menial food job fits into the season’s food motif that i talked about once, which in turn fits character-wise with buffy’s ambivalence about being alive. a somewhat grotesque/humiliating job fits with the mood of material existence being unpleasant. (also, xander impulsively chowing down on food speaks to him probably not being ready for commitment) (2) i think this whole subject was just hella daring for the show to do. having been a poor and suicidally depressed 22 year old in a fucked up sexual relationship while working a menial job, season six and episodes like doublemeat palace just ring true to me as something for a show about growing up to depict. sometimes real life really is a grind, and sometimes it really does feel profane, absurd, surreal, etc. (3) i really like the way that buffy, willow, and xander and anya’s stories all fit the theme of episode but in different ways. i wouldn’t say the episode is a super nuanced take on drudgery, but it does have layers thanks to the three different storylines, and it comes off as clearly conscious and oriented around its theme. there are other parallels like amy, spike, and halfrek each being influences, too. (4) there’s some cool formal execution. not all of it. willow’s story, like a lot of her mid-season-six arc, is kind of tediously on-the-nose. but i enjoy pretty much every second of buffy’s part of the episode, because the direction is so in control of it. and i like the absurdist and genre-conscious playfulness. the soylent green riff, etc. 

i also disagree on your assessment of agency in the season but this post is long enough as it is. regardless, i certainly don’t begrudge you your opinion. it’s an often clumsy season. it also sounds like we enjoy things in different ways--i genuinely don’t care too much about writers contorting things in the interest of theme. i’m mainly trying to push against the implications (1) that the season was obviously just trying to be dark and grim, and just for it’s own sake or something. instead of for deliberate and interconnected artistic reasons that one could analyze and talk about, and (2) that there is some monolithic opinion on and response to it.

[recentanimenews]

What My Hero Academia Gets About Superheroes that Western Comics Don't

In Western comics, superheroes are the exception instead of the rule. Special individuals work outside the law, going after villains the regular police force couldn’t possibly handle. Many times, they keep to the shadows, or at least keep a low profile, and often act without much regard for the damage they might do in the pursuit of their world-threatening foes. But in My Hero Academia, there’s no secrecy. Hero is just another job description. Everyone can be one—and if you are one, you most likely went to school for it.

My Hero Academia was inspired by this world of caped crusaders, but the universe of All Might and UA is different from anything seen in the Marvel or DC universes. And yes, I’m including X-Men: Academy X. Just because there is a school for gifted students doesn’t mean society has adapted to include superheroes on the day-to-day level. There’s a reason Xavier’s School for Gifted Students is a secret, private institution. But in My Hero Academia, instead of having superheroes be exceptional, it makes them the norm. Society as a whole is shaped around the assumption that people have superpowers, rather than only a few exceptional aliens, clumsy scientists, lifelong acrobats, and rich men with impressive R&D departments.

Every part of being a superhero is normalized in My Hero Academia. Classes assume superpowers and teach how to hone them into super moves. Being a top hero is a perfectly reasonable dream job. Firefighters, EMTs, and other first responders are people with superpowers suited to rescue and damage reduction, while “normal” superheroes need licenses to operate as a hero in the first place.

Basically, this society has police with superpowers and a super-powered force authorized to act like the police. There’s no vigilante justice because the would-be vigilantes have the legal authority to act, and if they don’t have the legal authority to act they’re shut down by the super-powered police. We see this with Stain, one arc’s main enemy. Of all the characters, Stain hews the closest to a traditional western superhero. He is a vigilante because he takes righting wrongs (or what he sees as wrongs) into his own hands.

Continuing the theme of vigilantism, this arc also features members of Class 1-A getting officially reprimanded by the police for intervening without a license.  In spite of saving lives, the law comes down hard on their actions. This is because any legitimacy the superheroes get is from their license. The license isn’t just the go-ahead to use powers in a lifesaving manner, it’s a banner of recognition which says “I can be trusted to intervene here safely.”  

The system only works when superheroes get the same implicit trust as other lifesaving professionals, and like those professionals they must be licensed and trained to respond calmly and effectively in crisis situations. High school students are neither, no matter how well intentioned. So the anime makes an important point—a point that many Western superhero comics often fumble badly—that vigilantism is almost always a terrible idea. The romantic idea of a special person righting wrongs that the system ignored or perpetrates almost always falls apart upon exposure to the complexity of real-life society and the fallibility of the people who decide that they are the arbiter of justice, as is the case with Stain.

  Importantly, My Hero Academia doesn't shy away from acknowledging this in its treatment of All Might. As the Symbol of Peace, All Might ties with Stain as the most "Western" of the heroes in the series. All Might is an icon, a source of inspiration, and makes himself special in a sea of superheroes. Like Deku, he has an origin story in receiving One For All. But All Might takes a drastically different path than one Superman might fly: He passes on his power and then is forced to retire due to his own injuries. He might be an icon, but the Number One Hero isn't infallible and had to hang up his cape.

Meanwhile, back in the western comics that My Hero Academia draws from, superheroes almost always operate either as unsanctioned vigilantes or as unofficial, deniable allies of the government. Getting caught by regular law enforcement is a quick trip to a long, long jail sentence, as even if they’re doing good they are breaking a staggering number of laws. Because of this, and because the caped crusaders of the comic shop are explicitly exceptional, the comics often focus on why our hero is different from you, the reader. This establishes why the hero exists in their world—how they got their superpowers—and also justifies adding another superhero to the comics world in the real one.

As a result, superhero origin stories are the bread and butter of western comics, as any trip to the movie theater in the last decade or so could show you. Every hero has some pivotal moment in their life when they awaken to their responsibility: the death of their parents, the bite of a radioactive spider, a rocket crash as they flee a dying world.

In My Hero Academia, a superhero’s origin story is in many ways passing an entrance exam. Of course, the motivations behind each student at the school vary and their reasons for wanting to be a superhero are fascinating looks into their personalities, but they don’t have a singular origin moment when they knew they were going to be a superhero. They just grew up in a world where superheroes existed and being one is a valid career path, and they knew what schools to try to get into to become one. Their origin story is genetics, at least when it comes to their powers (Deku excluded, obviously).

This is honestly a brilliant approach to the world of superheroes. Instead of putting all the weight of a character into their origin—the whys and whats that pushed them to don the cap—characters are forced to ask themselves over and over again why they should be a hero. It isn’t a matter of responsibility, as there’s an entire planet of people with powers out there. Different quirks are more suited to heroics, of course, but possessing a powerful quirk doesn’t make a powerful hero by default. Heroes in My Hero Academia have to choose, over and over again, to be a hero. They have to weigh the pros and cons, and are allowed to have utterly banal reasons for wanting to become a hero.

Because of all of this, My Hero Academia is not only a love letter to Western comics, but also an implicit critique of their negative and cynical depictions of society.  It keeps the ideas of self-sacrifice, upholding justice, and protecting the weak and downtrodden. But with the general availability of powers and the licensing system, it posits that you don’t need to be exceptional or better than everyone else to become a hero. You can make a difference in society if you do it the right way. So long as you work hard and do it for the right reasons, My Hero Academia says that you can be the hero you always dreamed of becoming—no dramatic origin story required.

---

Jeni Hackett is a features writer for Crunchyroll, very rarely blogs at Allons-y Jeni, and is always posting nonsense about anime, science, and more on Twitter @allonsyjeni. 

By: news+feed@crunchyroll.com

[princesofchina]

Seventeen: Reaction to You Having Depression (Woozi, Dino, Hoshi, Wonwoo)

WARNINGS: Depression, Self-Harm, Swearing

Just a reminder that mental disorders are extremely serious and concerning and not romantic by any means. I will be fulfilling this request because victims may feel placated by the thought of having someone by their side, and also because I’m sure that all the SVT boys would love and support you no matter what. Whatever you’re going through is valid, and it’s alright to feel sad and want support! If things are getting really bad, here’s a list of hotlines, as well as 100 reasons not to kill yourself.

And as a side note: hello, I’m the new regular member/editor B! I’ll be doing a lot of the editing for the blog, and will also be taking requests whenever they’re open! This is my first reaction, so I hope I was able to convey it all properly ^^  – Member B

Hoshi: Keeps you moving. Whenever you have an episode or get into one of your moods, he helps you through music and dance and whatever he can think of getting his hands on quickly enough. He’s so spontaneous you might just combust, but at the same time he makes it so utterly clear that he loves you with all of his heart, that you’ll still combust, but you’ll combust happily.

“Fuck,” your hands tremble as you knock your head back against the headstand of your bed hard, the loud noise resonating throughout the empty bedroom. Your shoulders shake as you hug your knees to your chest, burying your face into them. “fuck, Fuck, FUCK.” Your voice gets louder with each swear, and you knock your head back against the headboard each time. At one point you might’ve drawn blood, but you don’t slow yourself down to check.

It’s a coping mechanism. The hard thing about your depression is that it comes in waves, dropping on you suddenly and with the impact of a meteor. After your last episode, coming home from a particularly loaded afternoon lecture, you had to find some way to calm yourself down. Soonyoung wasn’t around, having notified you earlier that it would be a long day at the studio. You contemplate calling him but you don’t want him to see you like this, all torn down and vulnerable.

So of course, just because life likes to play against you, he ends up seeing you all torn down and vulnerable. 

“Y/N, I’m home early~ I see your shoes at the doorway~” Soonyoung’s in a cheery mood, entering the bedroom with a bounce in his step. The bounce immediately disappears and his expression hardens as he takes in your closed and crumpled form, utterly defeated. Though you can’t see his expression with your head buried into your knees, you can hear his sharp intake of breath. He says nothing else and you wonder if he’s left, lifting your head slightly only to find Soonyoung startlingly close, focus directed towards scrolling through his phone’s music library. When he plays the song, you recognize it as a calming favourite of yours. Soonyoung places his phone aside and reaches for your hand. He tugs it gently and you follow easily, melting into his arms. 

There you sway together to the gentle sound of the music, an awkward position by any means. However, you feel perfectly in place, calming down to the point of realizing your own exhaustion. He rocks you until he knows you’ve fallen asleep, and tucks you tightly in to bed. 

Wonwoo: A calming presence. Whenever things in your life starts to go wayward, Wonwoo is always there to whisper reassuring compliments into your ear, or provide you with closeness and intimacy if you so desire. He’s your rock, your complete stability. 

“I’m really sorry about this sir, I just can’t come in to work today. . . Family emergency,” your voice is clipped as you speak through the phone, moments away from breaking down. Your hand clutches the back of your kitchen chair in an attempt to hold yourself up. You just know that you would collapse otherwise. As your boss bids you well, you’re quick to hang up your phone and place it down on the kitchen table, trying to take deep breaths to calm yourself down. And you had tried so freaking hard.

You had so far managed to get up, get yourself dressed, and even have your teeth brushed, although the uncooperative toothpaste tube had caused some frustration. You even had gotten so far as to pour yourself a bowl of cereal, but then you spilt the milk and it had gotten just absolutely fucking everywhere, and your clumsy actions weren’t enough to clean up the mess fast enough. You had thrown the bowl in frustration only for it to shatter, a particularly sharp piece cutting your hand. And now you were standing there, too scared to move, too strung up to function, and you weren’t coming in for work again. The whole time a thought pounded at the back of your head. Wonwoo, where is Wonwoo?

With shaky hands and an even shakier predisposition, your hands pick up your phone to shakily enter the memorized digits, a number you’ve called too many times before in similar situations.

He answers on the second ring.

“Y/N? What’s wrong, babe?” His voice is calm, even with the underlying urgency, and it soothes you. He’s always had that soothing effect, and it’s one of the things that’s kept you drawn to him. It’s more addicting than alcohol, yet he kept you healthy. “Are you having another attack?” Your sniffles seem to be more than enough of an answer. “I’m coming over, hold still. You’re at your apartment, right? Stay on the line with me, babe.” It’s not as if you’re up to moving, other hand still clutched tightly on the back of that chair. You breathe out your agreement and he murmurs pacifying words all the way to your apartment, right until you feel lanky arms embrace you, and the phone is replaced with his rhythmic breath and live whispers. “I’m here now, it’s all alright. It’ll be alright.” He holds you until your breathing matches his, until your hands unclench themselves and you allow your body to relax. 

“Now let’s get you cleaned up.”

Woozi: You don’t tell him, he figures it out. Jihoon’s observational skills detect your hidden signs of depression almost immediately after the two of you start dating. He immediately tries to convince you to seek professional help, unconfident that he’ll be able to help you on his own. 

“Your leg’s jiggling again.”

Jihoon’s working diligently on his laptop, eyes trained on the composition program at hand. You wonder how he continues to notice your every move, but without fail he’ll point out your fidgeting before squeezing your leg lightly with his hand, effectively bringing it to a halt. He usually pulls back but this time his hand lingers, and he surprises you by looking up from his work to give you a concerned glance. “Are you that nervous?”

You try to look away but his eyes are piercing, and looking around at the rest of the waiting room only places you at a greater discomfort. You instead find yourself nodding evenly at him, trying to focus your eyes on a spot right above his eyes. “I’ve never been to a therapist before,” your voice comes out smaller and weaker than you intended, somewhat ashamed of your confession. Ashamed that it had taken you so long to take responsibility for your own health, and ashamed that you were in this situation in the first place. You know it’s not your fault... Really.... You hope it’s not your fault... yes, you’re.... Confident....

Jihoon picks up on your inner struggles as easily as he picks up on your jiggling leg. He closes his laptop, placing it aside and then shuffling closer to you. Before you know it he’s humming a song quietly in your ear, a volume low enough that you can no longer quite place the tune but you’re settled by the fact that it’s solely intended for you. “For your ears only,” he whispers, hand squeezing your leg once again. 

When the time of your appointment finally arrives, you’re sent off by your boyfriend with a tight smile and a kiss on the cheek. It’s at that moment you realize that he’s nervous too, and you walk into your appointment knowing that at the very least you’ll always have someone by your side. 

Dino: Master of distraction and misdirection. When Chan finds out about your depression, he very easily learns to utilize his innocent charms to subtly distract you from your problems. 

“Up again?” Chan’s voice is tired on the other end of the line, and you immediately regret calling him so late in the night once again. You had done the same thing just two nights previously, and only now do you think of how insensitive it might be. Your depression has been getting the better of you lately though, and you needed some way to ground yourself. 

“I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you up, you sound so tired. I just wanted someone to talk... Never mind, never mind,” you immediately go to hang up but Chan is quicker than you, brushing it aside easily.

“Hey, it’s alright. I’m still at practice actually, it’s been a long night, preparing for our comeback.” And now that he’s started, you know he won’t stop, recounting tales of an overzealous BooSeokSoon and the excitement they brought to the practice room for that day. You contentedly listen, happy just to hear his voice. His youth and excitement keeps your mind focused with purpose, and you start to forget the drowning feelings that had caused you to call in the first place. 

You fall asleep and Chan smiles into his phone. “Good night,” he whispers to the silent line, hanging up his phone and settling back into bed to return to sleep (hey, what’s a small white lie if it’s for your wellbeing? Anything for you.).

[eurazia]

1) So I've seen someone say that Nina meeting Azazel first is parallelling favamira, but they seem to forget that the very first scene we're introduced to Nina is also the scene of Charioce's triumphant return, when Nina hears about Charioce for the first time, so we kind of get the two of them introduced on the same stage. Also the argument that Nina is more herself with Azazel, while around Charioce she's more quiet and docile; I mean yeah, maybe that's because she's actually attracted to

2) Chari in a more conscious way that would make it her personal preference/choice rather than the fault of her ‘hot guy affliction’ and she’s not that way around Charioce because she’s afraid to speak her mind, but rather because she’s lovestruck and can’t believe their date is even happening. The dance scene shows us Nina feeling super comfortable with being close to Chari, with him touching her, to the point that she doesn’t even perceive Chari as a 'hot guy alert’ anymore; it shows us Nina

3) being genuinely happy and at ease. And even after the dance scene she’s talking to Chari quite comfortably, being totally herself (until she’s reminded all over again about how hot Chari is). As I said, as of now, the Nina/Azael relationship reminds me much more of Favaro/Kaisar rather than favamira, but, since it’s a two-cour show, things can change. But it would be such a waste of a beautiful, heartfelt scene if Nina and Chari weren’t meant to be, you know. What would even be the point?

(Ok, I’ve tried to answer this ask once and my pc crashed lol, was it karma? Let’s try again)

I’m glad you wanted to talk about this with me anon, because I’ve just seen what you’re talking about and I felt the need to write something.

First of all, it seems like we all shippers are trying to find evidences that will prove azanina or charnina lol and I can’t really call myself out of this.

So yes, if we’re going with the “first guy/first met = canon otp” then it’s undoubtedly that Charioce was introduced first to her, but Nina didn’t actually meet him. So, I wouldn’t really say that’s a valid evidence for both sides. thanks bread man btw

Also - and here we go with what reeeally bugs me the most - I want to spend a few words about Nina’s behaviour toward the two men, and I hope they’ll be indeed few. 

Statement: I don’t think how Nina behave with one guy or another is her true self. I bellieve she’s both.

Let’s be honest, Nina isn’t your typical Mary Sue female character, who cries,is shy and timid. She may be a little clumsy, but she’s vivacious, strong and really positive imho. (E.g. when she was ready to fight those criminals and couldn’t because of bishies everywhere: she wouldn’t cry because of her body if not for cursing it.)

So, no, I think she can be genuine with both, maybe in different ways too. But she’s definitely not forcing herself when she was with Chris. And just saying, if someone who’s usually cheerful and easy going is suddenly being quiet and docile, it doesn’t have to mean they’re feeling uncomfortable.As you perfectly said already, she’s being cautious toward him because she doesn’t want to disappoint any kind of expectations.

What’s wrong with this? Isn’t usually everyone tyring to look at their best when they want to impress/get to know/make them be noticed by their s/o? Saying that she’s not her true self is wrong, because she’s exactly being her dorky self, and overall she’s just trying to not look too much goofy… In which she failed imo lol because she had her goofy times on their dates, and stil Chris sweetly laughed at them. (!!!!)

Therefore, yes, if we want to say Nina is her true self when she interacts with Azazel, just give her time and she would do the same with Chris (this amount of time depends on future events we’ll see in the next episode tho)

There’s just one unique difference between charnina and azanina so far: Nina only tranformed into the red dragon when she was around Azazel. Is it a good thing? A bad thing? I can’t say for certain. All I can say is what I think about it.

If the red dragon is affected by the ‘hot guy affliction’ (to quote you), then it could easly be associated with the pure infatuation, and that would explain why Nina would feel the trigger any time a bishie looks at her (and she does it a lot! Maybe she’s an incurable romantic aww)On the other hand, what she feels for Chris must be certainly something more. I’m surely not saying Nina fall deeply in love with Chris at the first sight and that it’s true love and all. I wish I could said it, but to be fair, she’s waaay too shy to be so much in love. Yet.Just looking at how calm and at ease she behaved is already saying a lot; at this point she’s obviously very excited she could dance and speak and touch a man without any irreparable consequences. What she feels and what they had together has the potential to improve.

And to conclude, indeed, this is a two-cour show and things can still have a 180 flip change. At this point, whatever happens I’m probably just wishing for charnina to still be hinted in the story. I would lie if I said I don’t care about them not be canon, but even if they won’t be the end game, I’d be happy with them being the in-the-middle-of-the-story game, if that makes any sense lol

I mean, just give me the same amount of cuteness overload we’ve seen last week and I’ll be satisfied. Nina’s embarrassed/excited faces kill me e e

[wasabi-duck]

halfblood joonie

guess what my school computer has a blue screen lol what is this i dont understand what’s going on

not gonna lie i would rather be updating my nct blog because those are written scenarios and i prefer writing that way because i feel like it actually shows my ability but i owe it to you guys to get something out there

my mark lee thing can wait yikes :((

anyway demigod joonie was the most requested?? and i was like

THE SCREEN CHANGED

anyway i was gonna do like birth order but here we are now, doing namjoon

which is fine because i love namjoon

okay so if you guys couldn’t guess

namjoon is the son of athena

how could he not be??

the stereotype was always like blond hair and gray eyes but nah fam me and namjoon both don’t fit that stereotype and we are athena kids

but in this au namjoon is gonna have that off blond hair like there was that one photoshoot and there is a specific image in mind but it’s like sandy blond and it’s always messy because he constantly runs his hands through his hair when he’s thinking so always a mess but a nice mess because cutie

and he wears the big wire rimmed glasses that aren’t perfectly circular but almost like a bowl shape kind of thing?? like rounded at the bottom but then straight at the top or only a little bent is this making sense i bet it isn’t lol

he’s that kid that always wears the camp half blood tee with skinny jeans and some obscure accessory like idk a scarf or hat

and the aphrodite kids sit there and constantly roast him for his fashion sense but jin always scolds them and says that namjoon is a pure cutie bean who must be protected…

okay but backstory time because hell yah i love backstories

namjoon’s dad was a professor at a local college and he was a genius so it was no suprise that athena was attracted to him

unlike jin’s situation, athena and namjoon dad’s romance was a fleeting thing, and it only lasted but a few months

both of them were too proud and too headstrong to admit actual feelings or that they needed each other

but i personally believe that you don’t just have one true love, you love a lot of people in your life and it’s okay to love and be loved more than once and the mentality that you should save love for the true one actually pisses me off not gonna lie to you

and like they were in love and maybe it wasn’t the strongest love and maybe it wasn’t the truest love but it was still love regardless

athena kids are thought of like that’s how the athena kids happen i remember because percy was like do you have a belly button??

so athena was like you’re different than all my previous lovers and i think our child should be different too and that explains why namjoon naturally has black hair and brown eyes, not the usual blond and gray thing going on

when athena and his dad split up, things were kinda not amazing

his dad didn’t want to think about the relationship and about athena and so he just kind of chose to selectively forget about it

and so he doesn’t tell namjoon that he is a half blood

he tells namjoon that his mom and him were a college thing and that she didn’t want to deal with a child because she needed to finish her schooling whereas namjoon’s father was graduating

namjoon never felt a bitterness towards his birth mom but he always had the want to meet her one day and just have a conversation with her and have some sort of relationship with her…

his dad got married when namjoon was fairly young, in the third grade, and his stepmom and dad had three kids so namjoon has a bunch of half siblings

he really loves his family though, like he was extremely close to them especially his brother who’s the middle child out of the three half siblings

namjoon never felt out of place with them but there was always that longing to meet his mother that never went away

and guess what namjoon gets that chance

by age ten namjoon has already attracted numerous monsters, despite his dad’s efforts to mask his scent by marrying someone else and spraying febreeze in the house every two seconds

namjoon is already an extremely gifted and powerful demigod, already exhibiting powers that mimic something like telekinesis, and monsters have started to take notice

but namjoon, our clumsy bean child namjoon, always has a way of avoiding any harm

it’s because athena has her eye on him constantly and she’s always doing her best to make sure he’s safe

so like one day for instance, he’s walking home from the school bus and this monster comes at him and athena was posing as mom waiting for her kid or something and as soon as namjoon looked away she pulverized that monster into dust

but she seriously underestimates her child

because at age eleven namjoon is like boy genius and he notices the same lady always around and he’s like yikes creeper alert maybe??

so one day instead of you know, telling his dad, he confronts her down at the dollar store where he’s going to by his siblings some candy with his allowance money

idk the dollar store is within walking distance from my dads so this makes a lot of sense to me like this a very valid and relevant point in my mind okay so um like

anyway she senses another monster attack so she’s posing as a cashier and namjoon just kinda heads over to her counter and slams his five dollar bill on the table and he’s like

“we have the same eyes i think”

“also i see you around all the time”

and he just blinks up at her with big inquisitive eyes and she’s like oh sh-

and she’s like well i cannot just tell this kid that i’m his mom but i can at least get him to safety right??

and she’s like i gotta talk about this demigod thing but

suddenly a horde of monsters appear from the aisles and athena is like there is no time and so she uses her goddess powers to transport them to the boundaries of camp half blood

and she’s like look i know you’re probably scared and confused and worried but you need to go past this boundary here and you’ll find help i promise, but i need to get going, i’m not allowed to be this attached to you-

and she ushers namjoon past the border but then she’s gone and namjoon is like what the duck is this about

he doesn’t know if he should run back out and chase after her or if he should move forward and explore but maybe he should cry? always a valid option??

he just stands there dumbly and he feels like maybe he will cry because he doesn’t understand what’s going on but he wants to be home with his dad, not standing in the middle of god(s) only know where

but alas his saving grace arrives

it’s you

you’re the saving grace

you’re also a younger demigod and you’re in the hermes cabin currently because you haven’t been claimed and you’re just kind of wandering around camp because you still are a little !! about this whole demigod thing and you need some time to adjust

but you see namjoon standing there and you’re like !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

you run over and stare at him for a few seconds and you then grab his hand and you’re like we gotta find chiron

“you mean the centaur from greek mythology”

and you smile and nod excitedly “well duh, you are at camp half blood”

“what now”

“that place where all the kids if the greek gods and goddesses chill to escape the monsters in the mortal world? seriously how did you get here if you don’t know what this is”

so namjoon tells you his story and you’re holding his hand because small kids and you’re like oh i see i see okay i got it

and then you take him to see chiron and you’re like hello this is a new camper his name is joonie

and namjoon is like actually- but chiron is so busy welcoming him and all that he never really gets to say his official name (is that the right word probably not lol) isn’t joonie but whatever

anyway you stay by namjoon’s side while he gets the explanation of the whole demigod thing

and you’re the one who takes him to the hermes cabin and you’re like yes you can have your bed under my bed because we are basically best friends now!! and ofc namjoon agrees

he’s the kid who sits up really fast and bangs his head on the bunk above him

i actually fell off the top bunk once but that is another story

you and namjoon become bros and all the older demigods think it’s so adorable how you two always waddle around camp together and challenge everyone to duels and riddles and the likes

but then namjoon gets claimed

oh yes namjoon gets claimed one day when you two are sparring and it’s been a while now since he’s arrived at camp and you know what being claimed means

it means that namjoon isn’t gonna be your bunk mate anymore and it means that he’ll be at a new cabin with new siblings and he’ll probably end up forgetting about you or something

and your small brain is not about to let that happen no siree so you fail to mention the glowing emblem above namjoon’s head

you think that it would like go away eventually but it’s been thirty minutes now since it first appeared so um yikes a daisy it probably won’t go away anytime soon but you are not about to lose namjoon

while you’re sitting there debating what to do, one of the athena kids (is it annabeth chase, my queen, my hero, my everything)

no another athena kid comes over and they’re like duDE UM!!

and you’re like b i t c h do you wanna throw down

and namjoon is like wait what’s going on what’s happening am i dying or something

and the athena kid is like no, well yes, we are all technically dying, but i mean you’re our new sibling

“our”

“the athena cabin, i’m sorry”

and namjoon’s eyes light up and he’s so excited and you’re like who am i to take this happiness from him

you don’t walk with him to meet up with chiron or anything, you go sulk in the hermes cabin tbh and kick his bunk and then whine when it hurts your foot

but guess what guys

guess what

guess who comes back later

you right

it’s namjoon

he waves to you and you’re like !!

“i missed you already, you wanna keep sparing. i already got my new bunk set up and all. it’s not as fun around here without you”

and then you run into his arms but he is not expecting that and he tries to catch you but that doesn’t really go so hot and he ends up toppling backwards with you crashing down on top of him

based on true events in case you’re wondering

you knew from that day on that you and najoon were inseparable

fast forward many years so you are out of the awkward small child phase which isn’t awkward really because it isn’t middle school yet

you got claimed by your godly parent so neither you or namjoon are in the hermes cabin anymore!!

but you still are thick as thieves get it lol because hermes cabin-

okay anyway

i dont wanna be generic with all of these so guess what

in media res my dudes, on media res

behold you and namjoon are on a quest and guess who else is there it;s hoseok and yoongi and you guys are having a blast because yoongi nearly managed to become the captive bride of the god of the west wind

hoseok kidnapped a dog and he keeps the thing in his shirt when you guys are setting up camp for the night so he won’t be cold

namjoon almost became a gang lord down in southern new york

you had to fight off rampant cereal gods when the others were going to take a group bathroom break

you and namjoon are sharing a sleeping back

wait what

hoseok somehow managed to burn his and yoongi was like you can’t sleep with me you freak, im still mad you love that dog more than me anyhow and hoseok was all excuse me are you trash talking our child

they were so busy bickering and whining and namjoon, the designated squad leader, was not having it, and so he’s like hoseok here just take mine okay

and then you were like but joonie what about you

and hoseok was all like share

namjoon looked to yoongi hopelessly and yoongi just flipped him off

“excuse me, how;s jungkook gonna feel when he knows you’re trying to win me over”

and you kinda “well i mean i guess we can share”

and hoseok is like “wow what are the odds you’re the only person with the huge two person sleeping bag haha #crazy”

yes he said the word hashtag

but namjoon is all stamerry and blushy and it’s so funny because the super composed, super calculating, super strategic son of athena is at a loss for words and it’s

#crazy

and yoongi is like wow i guess hoseok will take the first watch then

and hoseok is like wow that’s so sweet of you for volunteering-

yoongi smirks and curls up in his sleeping bag and yawns and slips off into dreamland and hoseok is pouting but he starts patrol duty with his puppy safely poking his head out the top of his shirt

and namjoon kinda gives you this look and you shrug “it’s not any different than that time we had to share a bunk when connor and broke the one and they needed extra room you know?”

except it is very different because namjoon is in l o v e with you and he doesn’t want to share a sleeping bag because he might do something weird like try to hold your hand or sleep talk about you and that would not be a good time

but he curls up in the sleeping bag and he motions for you to join and you’re like okay chill nice not like i like namjoon or anything haha

you snuggle up beside him and you’re like are two person sleeping bags even a real thing

they are confirmed

you guys refuse to speak and you can hear hoseok giggling and that makes things more awkward tbh but it’s okay because he’s warm

and so your put your feet on his legs and even through the socks he can feel your cold feet and now the two of you are laughing

but then yoongi sits up and threatens to murder you both in cold blood

so you end up zipping it and going to bed

hoseok wakes namjoon up an hour or two later because switch shift and he’s sleepy

namjoon groggily wakes up and he goes to sit up but??

is that your head on his chest??

why yes it is??

hoseok starts to squeal and namjoon glares but hoseok is

you know that spongebob meme with squidward and crabby patties

that’s hoseok @ namjoon

“you like them don’t you namjoon”

and namjoon was like hoe i thought that was obvious please

and hoseok was like um idk if they know dude

and najoon just groans and stands up and waves hoseok off and goes to stand guard

he doesn’t like the whole crush thing because his entire life as a child of athena you know, he’s used to approaching everything as a problem that has a solution

something that he can work through and tackle if he takes the right steps

everything is a process and with the smart logical choices, he can accomplish anything

but this is different because suddenly his head isn’t in charge and no matter how hard he tries to examine the situation logically, you can’t think like that, not when you’re in love with someone all rules go out the window and namjoon is like wth is this i am not a fan can this not be a thing

he overanalyzes every single scenario and one second he’s determined that you must be in love with him but one second later, he thinks you must hate him or something and that the two of you will never work out and it’s such a vicious cycle

he just wishes he would have some answers-

and then this voice pops up in his head and it’s very familiar and namjoon is like i know who this is but also at the same time i have no idea whatsoever

and then it hits him- the mysterious lady from his childhood, the one who got him to camp and he’s ! because he had totally forgotten about her till now

and the voice is like “you really forgot about your own mother”

and namjoon is !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! because mom since when was that a thing

but it makes sense and suddenly everything starts to click and namjoon is like wow your local son of athena couldn’t figure that one out, amazing

but she’s like look kid im sorry that i havent been around, things are complicated, dont be mad

and namjoon is like im not dont sweat it

athena just tsks like thats because you never let your emotions lead

“but it’s okay to let them take over sometimes you know”

you know what she’s implying and the conversation doesn’t last much after that

and namjoon is like right i should maybe confess maybe ill do that when i get back home or something---

but suddenly he’s taken aback because there’s this clanking and rattling and all of th sudden there are these skeletons rising from the earth and namjoon is like just my luck

he draws his sword and starts yelling for the rest of you to wake up and hoseok is first up and he’s racing to get yoongi awake and meanwhile namjoon is battling off these monsters

he uses those telekinesis powers i mentioned to hurl boulders and other projectiles at them while using his long sword to fend off others but they keep multiplying

hoseok comes in with his double daggers and he’s slicing and diving and jabbing

and yoongi has his scythe and he’s totally wrecking these monsters and smashing them to dust

you’re nowhere to be found though and namjoon turns his head for a split second and that’s his mistake

he doesn’t feel the arrow pierce his shoulder, not initially, but he feels the searing pain as yoongi yanks it from his flesh later

he stumbles and trips forward and he’s clutching his shoulder and hoseok is shrieking and yoongi is cursing

namjoon feels like he’s slipping from reality and he doesn’t know what’s happening save that the world is spinning before his eyes

but then your cry snaps him back from his daze and he watches you stumble towards him

yoongi and hoseok fight off the rest of the monsters as you kneel beside namjoon, cradling his head in your lip

namjoon is too shocked to cry but then he sees the tears streaming down your face and he suddenly feels overwhelmed

yoongi and hoseok run over when the coast is clear and yoongi is the one who pulls the arrow out because hoseok is shaking too badly to do so

“i thought i heard something and so i woke up and went to check it out, but clearly i wasnt right and now you’re going to die because of me namjoon, oh gods, you can’t die!!”

and youre sobbing and hoseok is like you need to calm down so i can treat this thing and namjoon is slipping from consciousness and you’re holding his hands tightly between your own

yoongi is praying hard while hoseok does his best to clot the blood flow and go through his bag in search of ambrosia and nectar

namjoon’s eyes close and his lips part and you’re crying harder now because this it, this is the last time you’re going to see namjoon

“i love you, i love you more than life itself namjoon, and im not going to let you die, do you hear me!?”

hoseok pulls out the thermos of nectar and he hands it to you

for those who dont know, nectar is like the healing thing for demigods and it’s not guaranteed life saver, it works hella good

anyway, you hold the thermos to namjoon’s lips and do your best to make sure he drinks some of it

hoseok assures you that namjoon is gonna make it, upon further examination, the wound isn’t deep and it missed any vital nerves or organs

still you can’t help but cry

you hold namjoon in your arms the entire night and none of you guys sleep because you’re so scared??

namjoon does wake up, and he’s fine… he’s just sore the next morning

he first asks about you though if you’re okay and then he looks up and finds you staring down at him and he’s o h

you smile down at him “i swear to god, dont you ever pull that on me again”

“i wasnt trying to die”

omg wth my namjoon ones are always the longest, namjoon, yoongi and jungkook

anyway you mouth “i know” and then stroke the hair from his eyes

hoseok and yoongi watch on but they don;t interfere and they dont get nosy, they jsut let you guys have your moment

it’s like a mutual understanding after that

like the scare makes you realize that yes, you love namjoon, more than a friend

and yes, namjoon loves you too, more than anything in the world

and hoseok and yoongi realize that they’re third and fourth wheeling on the quest and it’s awkward

because once namjoon starts feeling better, it’s like a switch was turned on and now he’s trying to impress you with the psychology of attraction and holding hands and love and it’s a hot mess

and he’s vowing to protect you and you’re like honey i gotta protect you…

yoongi and hoseok regret their life choices

but they think it’s cute and when you guys all return home safely (with the dog in tow), everyone starts handing over drachmas and dollars because their was a camp wide bet on if you guys would get together on your quest

[nerobombs]

Writing Oppression

(Want more? Check out my Writing tag!)

Hope you’re not sick of the Stormblood-induced rants yet, because here’s another one.

I’m sure there’s many Domans, Xaela, and Ala Mhigans getting ready to get back at those darn Garleans and settle into their newly liberated homes. So I’m sure a lot of the player stories that come out of Stormblood will be surrounding that: themes of oppression, of returning home with new experiences, the idea of institutionalised power and how it can be wielded, and so on.

Well, maybe, anyway.

To preface this, my demographic is not what you might call “disenfranchised”. None of the places I’ve lived in or visited are particularly rife with genuine oppression--which I suspect will change when my North Korean visa finally gets approved and America hits its third year of a Cheeto Benito presidency (ooh, spicy political commentary!)--so I’ll admit that I’m approaching this topic more in theory and from logical examination than from experience. 

I’ve definitely consumed media wherein oppression is depicted however, and more often than not such things end up depicted more cartoonishly than anything else. You know, really weird and unintuitive racial slurs, mustache-twirling commissars, goose stepping secret police, and so on. 

I’d like to avoid that. Oppression in fiction can be a fascinating topic and an environment that provides for a lot of intrigue.

And if you’re worried that this post is going to contain some ol’ SJW bullshit then, well, it’s not.

So if you’re looking to approach the topic of Garlemald’s occupation in your storyline, you may want to read further.

1). Internalisation is a genuine factor to consider.

In short, when you get told something often enough, you’ll probably start believing it regardless of whether or not you cognitively recognise it as false.

For a historical example, a “colonial mentality” is a form of internalised oppression where the colonised people feel themselves to be inferior to their imperialist colonisers. The nuances are complex--thoughts can range from “Well they managed to take over half the world and we didn’t so we must be worse people” or “our economy is so much better now with our new overlords”, and so on--but the principle is relatively simple. This sort of thing happened a lot with the spread of the Spanish Empire and the rule of the conquistadors, particularly with places like the Philippines.

It happens a lot in marketing too: women are told they’re not thin and beautiful enough, men are told they’re not manly and successful enough, and both of these things lead to self-esteem issues. Same mechanism, for the most part.

Weirdly enough, this is something I almost never see portrayed in fiction with oppressed societies. It’s a kind of society-level Stockholm Syndrome. Certainly there will be Domans or Ala Mhigans or Xaela who truly believe that they are inferior to Garleans and that Garlemald is something to aspire to, and breaking such an internalisation takes a lot of work, simply because the information is everywhere.

So when you’re considering why oppressed citizenry might side with their oppressors, consider internalisation. Consider the effect of seeing and hearing “Be grateful to your conquerors for they are better and wiser” day in, day out.

2). Bigotry and intelligence are not mutually exclusive.

Or to put it another way: people can genuinely believe racist shit regardless of their status, upbringing, or intellect.

Let’s write a character, Garlic McGarlemald the Garlean. For all intents and purposes he is kind, fair, and intelligent. He’s a university professor, donates to the poor, loves his wife and children, and also sincerely believes that all Xaela are savage horsefuckers who cut off their enemy’s heads in order to consume their soul.

Wait, what?

One of the pitfalls of writing an oppressive or racist society is the depiction. A lot of these stories depict all oppressive racists as universally dumb, drooling ignoramuses who spend all day teaching their children to play “Lynch the Minority” and “Spell the Slur”. And, well, okay, there are certainly people like that. 

But in a truly oppressive society, the dumb racists are not the dangerous ones: the really dangerous ones are people like Garlic McGarlemald who is, for the most part, an ordinary person perfectly capable of critical thinking, yet still inexplicably believes in this shit for reasons no party can really rationalise.

And if that doesn’t seem logical in the slightest, it’s not. But it’s certainly realistic.

People do actually believe in stuff like that. You had scientists in the 19th century seeking “natural, evolutionary” reasons as to why other races were inferior to whites. You had logicians, biologists, and anthropologists huddling around and wondering why whites were so much awesome-er than all those other dirtfarmer races. It was something that was just believed. Maybe it was because it was a cultural cornerstone or it was merely a result of internalisation, but people who by all rights could be considered intelligent and capable believed that stuff.

And while we’re on the subject...

“But my bigot character doesn’t really believe in that stuff, of course he’s smart enough to know that’s all bollocks,” you might say. Garlic McGarlemald is just under social pressure to pretend he believes this stuff, that’s all!

Well, that’s not really valid. For one, from a writing perspective, that kind of argument is a total cop-out; it’s a lazy way to keep your character “clean” for fear of being controversial. For two, lip service has absolutely zero value in this context: unless Garlic McGarlemald is actually willing to take action, he’s still a bigot. A passive and well-meaning bigot, perhaps, but still a bigot. Not only is he a bigot, but he is a hypocrite too, because he refuses to jeopardise the racist and bigoted system that he himself benefits from. 

And this is where the “with us or against us” mentality sort of comes from: if your character is part of the oppressors, then he/she is an oppressor unless they’re actively working against it. Being passively racist is still racist, so sayeth the oppressed, because institutionalised power is still power.

3). Prejudice can have layers.

Consider the “double jeopardy hypothesis” which proposes that, for example, a Asian-American woman is not only subject to racism and sexism, but to the combined effects of both simultaneously. And if she falls into the LBTQ camp (or however many letters that camp seems to have these days), then she’s going through triple jeopardy because heterosexism piles on like a big smelly heterosexist frog.

I say that it’s a hypothesis (and from a scientific standpoint it still is) but this isn’t particularly beyond the stretch of logic.

Let’s say your Xaela meets Garlic McGarlemald. Now obviously, Garlic McGarlemald hates your Xaela. But he doesn’t hate your Xaela just because your Xaela is a Xaela: Mr. Garlic hates your Xaela because they talk funny, dress in rags, have a weird pagan religion and because they’re bisexual. 

Would Garlic McGarlemald hate a Garlean who was the same thing? Well, we don’t know. But the point I’m trying to make here is that an oppressive society will use everything, and I mean everything it can weaponise against the people they’re trying to oppress.

To go further, Garleans might dislike that Domans speak a weird language, they also hate Domans because they eat raw fish (barbarians!), force their children to kneel on bamboo mats (monsters!), and refuse to export Mother 3 to the United States, in addition to taking eight years to finish a new Persona game (complete heathens, I say!). 

See what I mean?

 4). People who belong to the oppressor group can have nice qualities.

If you’ll harken back to my intro paragraph, I don’t like it when oppressors are depicted as universally revolting mustache-twirling Nazis with no redeeming qualities.

Like I said, Garlic McGarlemald can be considered a nice guy, excepting the racism. People who are among the oppressors in an oppressive society aren’t universally bad. After all, for a lot of them it’s not particularly their fault that they were raised in a society that encouraged such bigotry. And internalisation happens with things like racism too: even when they become educated, they seek new reasons to justify their bigotry because it’s all they were raised to know. 

There is a nauseating amount of self-righteousness that comes with depicting all racists and bigots as unrepentant monsters who hit so many branches of the stupid tree that they’re in danger of accidentally swallowing their own extra chromosome. 

So don’t do that. If you’re going to write your oppressors, at least write some of them as mostly well-meaning.

5). Avoid tokenism.

Or, to put it in a more wordy way: either judge every group within your story as a group, or judge every group within your story as individuals.

Let’s say that Garlic McGarlemald is actually not a nice man, and he drinks alcohol and beats his wife.

Edgy, isn’t it?

Now, when being written by a not-so-good writer, Garlic McGarlemald won’t place any stigma upon his group, because he is part of the oppressive Garleans. It’s not that all Garleans are drunken wifebeaters, it’s just that Garlic McGarlemald specifically has that problem.

Meanwhile, Xaela Xaelason accidentally trips and breaks a bottle, therefore all Xaela are clumsy!

No. That can’t fly. And the reason why that can’t fly is because it very quickly descends into becoming preachy.

This happens a lot with poorly written fantasy novels: there is a single named character who is gay or has dark skin, and that single character ends up representing the author’s entire views on gays or black people.

So when you’re writing something like an oppressive society, multiple characters are important. You have to be willing to do the work to portray each side--oppressors and the oppressed--as having complex people who aren’t easily categorised. 

Don’t insert a Token Doman or a Token Good Garlean or a Token Evil Xaela and then use that character to make blanket statements within your story. Because that’s just lazy writing.

6). Oppression is hard to escape.

Whether you’re one of the oppressors attempting to open your worldview or you’re one of the oppressed trying not to fall down the same slippery slope, oppression isn’t an easy thing to “win” against.

There’s no magic argument or book that suddenly allows one to instantly widen their acceptance of race, religion, language, sex, sexual orientation, etc. Similarly, there is no Garden of Eden free of prejudice.

If you’re planning to tackle oppression as a theme, be prepared to be conscious of it, for as long as the theme is relevant. You can’t have Xaela Xaelason make it to the land of his people and decide that Prejudice Doesn’t Exist. No, Xaela Xaelason would be judged based on the fact that he was born in a city and doesn’t know any Xaela customs or traditions. He’d be judged for not staunchly supporting the tribal religion. He’s among other Xaela, and there will be prejudice there, too.

It’s a double-sided magnet, and it has some powerful pull. Be aware of that.