#i mean most people can't respect real peoples asexuality so

[rexrattorum]

I really really really wish people would honour characters asexuality.

[rosabell14]

The hunters of Artemis, Reyna, and Asexuality in Riordan's writing

I kinda started thinking about this since Reyna became a hunter. I could never articulate why I hated this Choice. I was asexual after all. Shouldn't I be happy about this rep? We Ace people barely get any after all. Then I realized that it's because I just didn't like the hunters as ace representation. And I didn't need to be grateful for mediocrity.

You want to know why the hunters of Artemis suck in general? And as Ace rep specifically? Because Riordan did not write them with that mindset.

Like people are so busy hailing this man as the king of representation in literature(blegh) that they forgot how heteronormative and white(sometimes racist) the original series was. Y'all really think this man was thinking about writing asexuals in the year 2007? Get real. What Riordan was doing was a white man trying to write feminism and failing (there's a reason most of his female characterization of female characters boils down to tough "not like other girls" characters who are dicks to the boys around them yet also to the girls around them if they're jealous)

Now onto the hunters.

The hunters when first presented in TTC are not a group of asexuals but rather religious celibates. Fantasy Pegan nuns if you may. The first problem arises when their ages are brought up.

"Then the archers came from the woods. They were girls, about a dozen of them. The youngest was maybe ten. The oldest, about fourteen..."

Remember, before ToA gave us Emmie and Jo, the hunters WERE all young girls. Now why in the world are they so young? Especially when in the actual myths, the hunters could come from any age whatsoever? Well the reason is a doozy.

"Are you surprised by my age?" she asked.

"Uh… a little."

"I could appear as a grown woman, or a blazing fire, or anything else I want, but this is what I prefer. This is the average age of my Hunters, and all young maidens for whom I am patron, before they go astray."

"Go astray?" I asked.

"Grow up. Become smitten with boys. Become silly, preoccupied, insecure. Forget themselves."

Hooo boy. What a way to phrase it. Going astray. Losing themselves. This kinda confirms that the reason why Artemis goes after young girls specifically is because she only wants girls who have yet to finish puberty. Girls have yet to discover their own sexuality. Now I'm not a representative of Asexuals everywhere, but I'm pretty sure most of us don't discover our sexuality at the age of ten. Let alone have the maturity to decide to become celibates about it. And let me reiterate: celibacy is not sexuality. Sure asexual people CAN choose to be celibates but it's not the same thing at all. In fact Zoe and Thalia are big cases for this. Both of them had liked men before(herakles and luke) but joined for their own reasons. Thalia to escape the prophecy and Zoe out of heartbreak. Hell, Bianca herself is mostly swayed by the idea of having no responsibility and a new family.

Now Rick does another thing that goes against the myths. The exclusion of make hunters. Artemis frequently hung around or taught male hunters who respected her. Daphnis, Scamandrius, freaking Hippolytus whom Artemis greatly cared about. Oh but we need to come up with bullshit reasons why Nico can't just join the hunt with his sisters so the hunters of Artemis are all: Ewww men. Also note how at no point does Riordan mention people who fall in love with women.

Now the next point is the oath itself. Artemis says this:

"What oath?" I said.

"To forswear romantic love forever," Artemis said. "To never grow up, never get married. To be a maiden eternally."

When I tell you that Emmy and Joe were retcons . Rick was freaking INSISTENT on the hunters being kids. Also note the three points: to never fall in love, to never get married, to stay a maiden.

I mean I think I don't need to explain why obsessing over the virginity of young girls is creepy. Does Riordan think girls older than fourteen can't keep it in their pants? And let me be adamant here Riordan only cares about the virginity Clause here. He mentions falling in love and marriage because he sees them inherently intertwined with sex.

Now onto the wording of the oath itself:

'I pledge myself to the goddess Artemis. I turn my back on the company of men, accept eternal maidenhood, and join the Hunt.'

I mean you might be able to interpret men here as mankind and therefore excluding women as well. But I have many reasons to believe that Riordan didn't even CONSIDER women as a possibility(someone inform this man that lesbians existed smh 😞). Also note that falling in love is not mentioned in the actual oath but maidenhood is.

Now onto the next big issue. Percy Jackson's Greek gods and its chapter on Artemis. It basically confirms all of my problems.

"IT’S NOT THAT ARTEMIS HATED ALL MEN, just most of them. From the moment she was born, she knew one critical fact: Guys are kinda gross."

No mention of girls. In this chapter Percy(Rick) brings up Artemis' disdain for dudes over and over again.

“Let me be a maiden forever, Father,” Artemis said, twirling her finger in Zeus’s beard. “I never want to get married.---- But you can grant me a bunch of followers: ocean nymphs, river nymphs, wood nymphs—what the heck, how about mortal girls, too? Any girls who want to join me can become my followers, as long as they remain maidens like me. They should probably make the decision when they’re about nine years old, before they get interested in boys, because after that, they’ll be all distracted and of no use to me.”

Yikes yikes yikes. Ladies and gentlemen the age has been lowered to 9. Freaking 9. Also I guess girls older than that don't need Artemis' protection then? (the real problem is that older/married girls should be out of Artemis's jurisdiction and under the protection of other gods like Hera, Hestia, and Ares. But Hestia is barely there. Hera is terrible and the Amazons also suck)

Now when I tell you that Artemis' big point was about virginity, I mean it. This actually has mythological evidence.

The myths actually DO mention what happens when female hunters fall in love. Rhodopis and Euthynicus were two hunters who offended Aphrodite by choosing a chaste life so she had Eros make them fall in love. However note that they weren't booted out of the hunters for falling in love, but rather after having sex in a cave. THAT was what Artemis took offense to.

Another myth is the story of Aura. A huntress who offended Artemis by comparing their breasts(Greek mythology am I right?). Saying that her breast were better than Artemis' because they were smaller and hey maybe that means that Artemis isn't actually a maiden. Artemis punishes her by making her lose her VIRGINITY. She goes to nemesis for revenge. Nemesis goes to Eros who makes Dionysus fall in love with Aura and when Aura refuses his advances he ties her up and... Yeah you can guess where I'm going with this.

But hey! Those myths aren't in the Greek gods book. You know which myth is? The myth of C(K)allisto. And this one angers me so much I want to chew on the drywall.

The way Riordan writes it. Zeus turns himself into Artemis, brings Kallisto's guards down with the disguise, gets close to her and then when Kallisto REJECTS Artemis' supposed advances, forces himself on her. I need to say this again. Kallisto does not fall in love, she isn't seduced, she does not break her oath. But we still need a reason for her to be yeeted out of the hunters so her lack of maidenhood it is

“You were my favorite,” Artemis said. “If you had come to me immediately, I could have helped you. I would have found you a rich, handsome husband and let you settle into a new life in the city of your choice. I would have allowed you to retire from the Hunt with honor. You could have gone in peace. Zeus’s assault was not your fault.”

Kallisto sobbed. “But I didn’t want to lose you! I wanted to stay!”

Artemis felt like her heart was breaking, but she couldn’t show it. She had rules about her followers. She couldn’t allow those rules to be broken, not even by her best friend. “Kallisto, your crime was keeping the secret from me. You dishonored me, and your sisters of the Hunt, by not being honest. You defiled our company of maidens when you were not a maiden yourself. That I cannot forgive.”

I want to slap this man so hard he flies to the opposite side of the universe. We are not here to blame victims of assault guys! Except we are! But with extra steps. If you get attacked, it's not your fault, but If you are too scared to admit the truth then you deserve to lose your only safe space and turn into a bear. Oh nooooo Kallisto DEFILED Artemis' company by being an icky non virgin. The moment you lose your virginity even if it's not your fault you get punished. But not because I'm gross but because YOU lied. How terrible! And he expects us to feel for ARTEMIS???

But rosabell! This is how things go in the myths. What was uncle Rick (bleghhhh) supposed to do? I don't know... Choose a different version of the story? There are versions were Zeus/Hera are the ones who transform Kallisto into a bear. There are versions where Kallisto actively CHOOSES to sleep with Artemis. Granted it's still assault because she's being lied to but at least then, she'd have a degree of autonomy in the events. At least Artemis could rightfully accuse her of breaking her oath. But noooo, Riordan doesn't know lesbians exist. He actively makes Zeus into a canonical Ra*ist. Why is he on the throne again?

(the fact that this book came out AFTER HoH y'all ��)

Once again, Riordan sees maidenhood(virginity)/love/marriage as intertwined. This is NOT what being on the aroace spectrum means. You can fall in love but not have sex. You can have sex but not fall in love. You can have sex AND still be an asexual. You can be married and still be a "maiden". Riordan doesn't get to claim to be such a progressive ally for retconning the hunters in 2017, TEN years after he first introduced the hunters because he suddenly remembered that lesbians exist.

Or more like because he doesn't know what to do with his female characters. The hunters more than anything are Riordan's heroine dumping ground. If you don't want it put them in relationships, either kill them(Bianca whose main purpose is to die) or make them eternal virgins(the hunters, Rachel). The fact that some people genuinely think that Calypso should have joined the hunters astound me. Girl suffered for years because of the gods and you all think that the best thing outside of Leo for her(not that I like Caleo) is to become a servant to the gods? Because you can't perceive a female character doing anything else if she's not in a relationship. Like with Thalia, this at least made sense on a strategic level because she didn't want to reach sixteen. Oh but we also don't know what else to do with her so she needs to want to be a hunter after the war is over so we give her a half-assed argument with Luke and now she can be all: wah wah Zoe you were totally right about boys. And the cherry on the cake is that she doesn't even get to be in the final confrontation with Luke or say goodbye to him because of a freaking STATUE. And after pjo her personality becomes Zoe 2.0 and her and Jason get ONE measly meeting.

When I first spoke of not liking Renya joining the hunters this is what I mean. Riordan had so many options with Reyna. Why did she have to leave her esteemed position which she worked so hard for? Two boys rejected her? Why couldn't she go reconnect with her sister more then? She could have joined the Amazons. But nooo Riordan was so allergic to the fans asking him wether she could be Bi or a lesbian. For the stupidest reasons too? Oh Reyna being a lesbian would come off as stereotypical because she got rejected by two guys beforehand! My dude, do you think people don't say the same thing about us who are on the aroace spectrum? That we say we are aro/ace because we got rejected before? Come up with a better excuse next time.

My brother in Christ couldn't even allow Reyna to talk about her sexuality and whatnot. It couldn't even be fully about her. No. He had to turn Reyna into his own mouthpiece admonishing the EVILLLL fans who may have shipped Thalia and Renya. He literally had her say the word "shipping". How cringe can you get? And then he had the audacity to admonish the fans by saying: Why does a strong friendship always have to progress to romance?

It's a sentiment I agree with but coming from this man, it's extremely hypocritical? I don't know Richard maybe because YOU are obsessed with shipping? No character can escape your shipping hands unless they're eternal virgins or dead. You literally turned the Argo2 into Noah's ark2. So much attention focused on shipping that the seven barely felt like friends.

Why does Reyna need to join the hunters? She can choose to not relationship without having to become a servant to female Peter pan.

This is actually a really adequate metaphor when you consider that Emmie and Jo say that they have not met Artemis in YEARS and Apollo mentions that the two of them were lucky she let them LIVE. god can you imagine joining Artemis when you are 9? At an age when you have still not finished maturimg cognitively and therefore shouldn't be trusted on taking a freaking celibacy vow(were you even given the talk yet that age) and after 70 years you decide you want to leave? If you're lucky Artemis will part with you on good terms but SIKES every person you probably knew before joining is now dead. Where is THAT angsty Bianca fic?

Speaking of Bianca. How she was handled also angers me. In another post, I've already talked about how the hunters barely gave her adequate information before letting her join.

How Zoe was the main reason for her death. Zoe KNEW that at least 2 people might die in the quest she was given and yet she decided to bring the least experienced girl to the quest and couldn't even watch her properly.

But you know what else pisses me off? The fact that THEY should have been the one to tell Nico about his sister's death. I've always hated how Chiron made Percy the CHILD tell Nico the other CHILD about his sister dying. But more than anyone, it should have been the hunters' responsibility. Bianca was THEIR responsibility. She died in a quest to save Artemis. The least they could do was tell her remaining family of her fate. The Doylist reason of course is that we need to kickstart Nico and Percy's complicated relationship and have Percy discover that Nico is a son of Hades. But in universe, the fact that they immediately fuck off from the camp upon regrouping makes them come off as extremely selfish. We don't even know if Bianca was given a funeral by them or not. We see Artemis being upset about Zoe but we never see her react to the news of losing Bianca.

[furst1ded]

Thoughts on Shipping Alastor from an AroAce person

(this entire thing is copy and pasted excerpts from a Discord rant so if the grammar is funky, that's why, I just felt like giving my 2 cents on the topic)

Aroace people can still participate in romantic and sexual interactions. All being aro/ace/aroace means is you don't feel romantic/sexual attraction upon seeing other people. You can feel it later on or in waves or could never feel that attraction but still can participate and love others in a fulfilling way. Some aroace people are fine performing intimacy onto others but dislike reciprocation, others are the opposite where they're fine receiving but not giving. It's a spectrum.

The nuances of asexuality and aromanticism aside, you can be in a relationship without being in a relationship. Platonic relationships beyond friendship are a thing (QPRs for example). But like, I get it. Not everyone who ships Alastor keeps it confined to a QPR. And his character seems pretty sex-repulsed and romance-averse. But here's the other thing. He's fictional. As long as his character remains aroace in canon, fans taking the silly radio man and making him kiss the devil isn't taking away from aroace representation.

This next bit is coming from me as an AroAce person myself. I ship Alastor. I write/read him kissing people and fucking and acting romantic. And guess what? It's related to expressing my sexuality. Alastor is one of my favorite characters in anything ever and I love that there's a character that represents a facet of myself in a popular media. I relate to him so goddamn much and that's why I ship him. He's a fictional character I like that I project onto, so I use him as a way to navigate and explore romantic/sexual relationships that I'm never going to participate in myself. He's not real so I just puppet him around to live through vicariously in the scenarios I don't want to be a part of myself but find super interesting. It's not anything new, I do the same with my own characters in the stories I write them in, it's part of storytelling, I just use him for a specific type of story for a specfic part of myself.

It's not like we're hurting anybody by shipping him. We're not drastically effecting canon and making him an alloromantic. I've seen plenty of fics that ship him that either make it a QPR or they thoroughly explore the nuances of his asexuality and what subtype of sexuality he is and how he navigates it and I love those fics because they speak to me on a spiritual level. Grayromantic Alastor, demisexual alastor, sex-repulsed but romance-favorable Alastor, sex-repulsed and romance-averse Alastor in a one-sided ship fic, etc they're all so important to me because it helps me live out my own sexuality and romantic orientation and explore myself.

I get it. Not everyone is respectful. Not everyone feels the way I do and use characters in this way. It can suck seeing people just ignore his sexuality when asexuals and aromantics don't get much in terms of screen-time. But you can't control everybody and what work they put out. And trying to censor stuff like that does more harm than good. I just explained why fics involving Alastor are so important to me. They normalize QPRs and aroaces being in relationships. That's probably what pisses me off the fucking most. If we're not allowed to write about aroaces being in relationships or romantic/sexual situations, you put aroaces into a box. A box where every aroace is perceived as sexless and loveless, which just isn't true. A box where aroaces are prudes or infants who can't handle hearing the word "sex". It's just so frustrating. You can be mad at fics that expressly rewrite or stomp on his sexuality, sure. You can't stop them, but you can disapprove of them. But let the rest of us have our fun making the literal devil and TV head man have the hots for a man whose teeth are yellower than the sun, Jesus Christ.

TL;DR: asexuality is a spectrum, I'm aroace and use shipping as a way to explore and express myself and I know I'm not the only one, trying to suppress works where an Aroace character is seen participating in romance or sex can actually be harmful in that it promotes only one idea of what being aroace is, and at the end of the day the character I'm talking about doesn't even exist.

[geminiartemis]

Let's talk about Mammon's asexuality!

Okay, first of all, I know this post is waaay late to the party, and maybe someone else has already talked about this much more eloquently than I ever could, but fuck it, I just feel like talking right now. lol

So, back in July, this official image was posted.

Most people were surprised to find out that Mammon is asexual. Heck, even I was surprised, although I had seen that theory around.

But after a while – and many, many rewatches of that episode – I realized that it makes perfect sense.

(Obligatory disclaimer: I'm ace. Not all aces feel the same way about sex and allos. Mammon is a piece of shit regardless of his asexuality. Most real life aces aren't assholes like Mammon. I actually love Mammon as a character. Don't take things too seriously. It's not that deep. Calm down. Take a deep breath. Drink water. TRUST US WITH YOUR ENTERTAINMENT!)

Exhibit A

Mammon insists that making a sex robot out of the clown pageant winner is not weird. Then he points at some random guy in the audience and says HE'S weird for even thinking that.

Here's what I think. Mammon knows it's weird. Look at his face. Listen to his tone. He's super weirded out. It's only acceptable to him because it'll make them money, because he's still a greedy bastard, but he does think it's weird. Nobody said anything and he still got defensive about it and put the blame on someone else. “YOU'RE weird, you sick fuck!”

The thing is, to him, sexualizing a young clown is probably just as weird as sexualizing anything or anyone else. Because he's ace and not too worried about the ethics of it as long as it makes him money, sex is weird, sexualizing people is weird, people who like sex and sexualize others are weird, but those things are generally socially acceptable, so everyone is a sick fuck, so how is sexualizing Fizz any different? He just doesn't see the difference, nor does he care to.

Exhibit B

Like I just said, people who sexualize Fizz are, in Mammon's own words, “sick, fucking degenerate adults.” Like, the idea actually disgusts him! He is so disgusted by his customers who sexualize Fizz that he can't even keep his opinion of them to himself while recording a TV ad! Not because he has morals or any affection or sympathy for Fizz, but because sex and sexualizing people disgust him. He just doesn't get the appeal at all. (But it makes him money, so he goes along with it.)

Exhibit C

Since sex is so important to allos and IT KEEPS BEING BROUGHT UP ALL THE TIME, we aces sometimes get the impression that it's all allos think about. We assume sex is allos’ Roman Empire. Assume that allos are always DTF. What do you mean you DON'T want to be fucked, Fizzie?? *Crimson voice* That's the kinda shit you allos like, right?!

The sad thing is, that's the sentiment I saw some people in the fandom express when this scene and this line came out. So Mammon's reasoning here isn't even an exaggeration, ridiculous as it is. I don't know if those people were hypersexual allos or clueless aces, but… yeah… it's something that some people think in real life, apparently.

Anyway, the point is, I can totally see the ace vibe in Mammon now. Is making one of the most irredeemable villains ace, the kind of ace who has zero respect for allos, a wise idea in terms of ace representation? Eh, we've already had this discourse in Hazbin Hotel with regards to Alastor, and everyone has their opinion on this. I'm not getting into that. And hey, Octavia is ace, too! I don't know if that will be relevant in the show, but it'd be really cool if it were. We'll see!

[celestial-artisan]

Cakes and sexuality

There's a buffet restaurant full of cakes of all sorts- The two most popular ones are the chocolate cake and the cheesecake, but there are many others as well. Cakes are also sorted into two types, ones with a stronger flavor and ones with weaker flavors.

When you enter the restaurant, you get a ticket saying 'typical menu', with one of the popular cakes written on it.

Heterosexual: You eat the cake written on your ticket.

Homosexual: You eat the cake not written on your ticket.

Bisexual: You eat both. It's a buffet, so why not?

Omnisexual: All cakes are great, but you do take note of the flavor before you eat it.

Pansexual: You don't care about what flavor the cake is- Cake is cake. You can even put a blindfold around yourself and eat whatever you feel like.

Polyamorous: You eat two cakes at once, flavor of your choice, because why not? The combination's nice.

Demisexual/demiromantic: You need to know enough about the cake before wanting to eat it. You don't feel the urge to eat random pieces of cake.

Asexual, alloromantic: Cakes with strong flavors aren't to your taste. You go to the line of cakes with weaker flavors and pick one you like.

Asexual, aromantic: Cakes aren't for you. This doesn't mean you hate people who like cakes. You go to a different restaurant and have whatever food you like.

It's that simple. Cakes. Everyone has different preferences, and it's nothing to get worked up about. Basic common sense to simply respect each other, right?

Unfortunately, this isn't what's happening in our world. Just because you eat the cake not written on the ticket, people are condemned, berated, and abused. You're deemed wishy-washy or a fake when you say you like to eat more than one cake. People don't understand when you say weak-flavored cakes are fine- "Why can't you eat the strong ones, then? Those are 'real' cakes!" You're either called a cold-hearted psychopath or swamped with people trying to find you 'the cake' that can 'warm you up' when all you want is no cake.

But I want to tell everyone reading this, you're not alone. Whatever way you want to eat(or not eat) your cake(s), I fully support you. 'Cake is cake', and people who don't like cakes or can't eat them? Cool!

Have a nice day and don't be deterred by whatever may block your way- I'm sending a week full of good luck to you!!!!!! :D

[bloggingboutburgers]

cw: discussions of bullying and aphobia

Hearing aroace peoples' existential crises over their friends discussing crushes, as someone who was socially isolated and severly bullied for their whole childhood and most of their adolescence so had NO friendgroup until adulthood and NO community or inclusion in literally anything (and when it came to sex and romance the other kids explicitly considered my potential involvement in either to be impossible / laughible because of how "weird" they found me (my autistic traits before I even realised I'm autistic)), felt like starving while listening to someone else complain about the food they're actively eating.

Food intolerances and dislike of different foods (as metaphor for being aro/ace) ARE important and difficult to grapple with when you're expected to eat specific foods in specific proportions at different times - but man did it sting until I realised why I felt that way and gave myself a talking to since my trauma doesn't justify belittling the very real struggles of aroace people.

I guess since the choice between 'stay alone or conform' was never really a choice because I was rejected no matter how cis straight or allo I was it taught me to go "fuck it" and accept myself regardless of what other people do or say (which ironically has lead to me becoming dramatically popular all of a sudden at uni, which has been weird to get used to since I have literally no experience with any of this - platonic or otherwise - which did lead to some advantage being taken of me but f*ck it we ball ^^'). And I guess it's just been difficult understanding why anyone would care so much about whether they're "normal" or not? You really have nothing to gain from that, safety is not guaranteed in conformity so best to live aroace and damn all aphobes to hell if they have a problem with that.

It's a mindset I'll never understand and that's only ok now insofar as that lack of understanding no longer results in misplaced anger at people who, for a time, I had once considered spoilt, ungrateful and out of touch. Basically, I'm full of sh*t and to every aroace person reading this you deserve good friends that actually respect you for who you are and do not even TRY to get you to change your mind about sex or romance. Have a lovely day x

Sincerely,

An aggressive emotional support anon

I'm genuinely sorry for all the hardships you went through. I don't mean to equate at all, truthfully from reading you and considering I WAS asked some of those questions as a kid regardless (the "who's your crush" bullshit and whatnot), it definitely sounds like I had it less hard than you did, but... I was bullied in elementary school and middle school, also not necessarily because I was aroace (I don't know why it happened really, I don't know if anyone ever knows, I boil it down to... me being me and there being something fundamentally wrong with me ig), and I definitely also get some of those feelings of "oh boo hoo you call that struggle" boiling in me when people discuss their own past struggles sometimes, so... Yeah, every one person's experience is unique, but I can at the very least very much sympathize.

I think a way it manifests in me is that I now have that compulsive, debilitating fear of being "othered" in any way, shape, or form, so I guess being aroace doesn't help my case. But at the same time... Well, like you brilliantly put it, when you're in a situation like that, no matter what you do, you won't be accepted anyway, and having that knowledge back then is probably also what lead me to figure myself out as aroace so early in life. Because I was treated as this much of an outsider, I ironically had that much room in my own head to form my own identity, far apart from others and the need to conform. Yeah, that identity may include a "piece of shit that doesn't deserve to be supported of part of a group" side that's been forced in, buried deep down and can't be erased, but... It also includes asexual and aromantic, and it's been cemented so hard from so early with such self-affirmation that later down the line, it saved me from a lot of stuff. I never had to force myself into a romantic or sexual relationship because I was undoubtably aroace – and people saw me as an outsider and an eyesore anyway. I spent years of being scared to go to school or out in the street every day, but later down the line, somehow, I feel it saved me from doing so many things I wouldn't have wanted to do.

...Bleh, sorry, didn't mean to turn this into me-me-me crap when you had the courage and sincerity of not only showing your experience, but finding the strength to show more love, understanding and support than a lot of people probably cared to give you for so long, despite all the pain you felt for so long. I guess I just wanna say... This take is definitely inspiring, so thank you on behalf of myself and others I'm sure, but also... I hope that, for yourself, you're also managing to own what you lived through in a way that allowed you to affirm yourself more strongly (it sounds like you are, I hope it IS the case), and most importantly, I hope you're in a much better place in your life now and you'll never have to return to that level of loneliness again.

[the-golden-dragoness]

hi beloved mutual i've never talked to!

you obviously don't have to answer but i thought i'd ask regardless. I'm not asking this out of gatekeeping or any of that "you can't use this terminology blah blah blah" crap, i'm asking this cuz i'm also aroace but don't actually know much about aroace identity and i'm trying to learn more

how can you be both bi and aroace? is it something about being on either spectrum but not being completely sex/romance repulsed, or is it something else?

thanks anyway, hope you have a great day :D

Hello there, citrus! Thank you for the ask.

While I will share my understanding of myself and why i bi-aroace as the term to refer to myself, I do have two disclaimers. First, this is a reflection of only how I use this terminology to reflect my identity, so of course other aroace people may interpret the same term differently. Secondly, this ended up being quite a long answer, so I apologize in advance, however I do find it important to share everything-- partly because I feel like leaving things out doesn't explain it as well. Also, I will share some basic things we both already know for the sake of others to follow this conversation.

I'm aroace, or aromantic-asexual. For me personally, that means I feel no romantic or sexual attraction at all. Of course its a spectrum, but this is just about me.

What many of my current mutuals may not know is that I actually identified as bisexual once upon a time! When I was in high school it was actually a friend who told me I was bisexual (she thought I knew this, but I did not), and I decided it fit me well enough to identify that way. I actually came out as bisexual when I was 17 a few years later, and for the most part, people still think I am. I do of course, consider myself aroace now, but with that identity I chose the indirect method; I don't feel the need to explicitly share it to everyone I know except my close family. While I'm no longer bisexual, I still love, participate in, and feel connection to the bi community. It's the first way I identify as bi still. This past identity has translated into my current bi identity as tertiary attraction.

Tertiary attraction is what the aspec community often uses to refer to other types of attraction outside of romantic or sexual. For me, these attractions include platonic attraction (friendship), sensual attraction (touch, such as cuddling, hugging, kissing), aesthetic attraction (looks), and alterous attraction (something other than platonic or romantic).

While I am aroace, I still consider myself a romantic, in a sense. I enjoy fantasizing about romance, something in relation to myself, but more largely in relation to fictional characters, ie. shipping in fandom. In this way, I also identify with the microlabel aegoromantic/sexual, which is essentially enjoying the fantasy of romance and sexuality, without enjoying the reality of it. I do also fantasize with respect to real people occasionally, such as popular celebrities I find aesthetically pleasing and have pleasant personalities. As in, I might say I think they're hot or sexy and say I'd enjoy doing things with them, but I wouldn't actually enjoy that in real life. They are unattainable, so everything I say about them is just fantasy. This is the second way that consider myself bi ( I suppose one might technically put this under sexual/romantic orientation, but I think the romantic/sexual aspect of is very much linked to the aesthetic and sensual aspect of it, so I suppose its a bit of both).

My friendships also actually influence my bi identity quite a bit. My friendships are all very queer, and my tertiary attractions influence that. I have very strong friendships that the average person might raise an eyebrow at, and may consider them to be more romantic than how my friends and I define them in reality. I also enjoy cuddling, hugging, and am not explicitly opposed to kissing (I don't actually kiss in my present friendships, but I digress). And of course, I love all my friends and think they are beautiful inside and out! This is the third way I identify with being bi.

The TL;DR is that I still consider myself bi because my past identification, and my current tertiary attraction that has several influences from my experiences!

I hope this helps you! Feel free to ask and message whenever you like :D

[darianias]

My view/TED Talk on Tengen Uzui and a platonic relationship with wives (not canon lol)

⚠️CW:⚠️ adult topics are addressed but nothing explicit is mentioned what so ever, probable typos everywhere, this is composes of half-awake ADHD tangents that wouldn't leave my mind so I'm writing it down so my brainw will chill and I can sleep lol. Meaning this isn't planned out in the slightest. No professionalism here. 😅 Also due to the tangental nature of this, don't take this as an attack on anyone or thing. Please. 🙏 That is the opposite reasons why I am posting this.

⚠️DISCLAIMER:⚠️ This talks about Tengen and his wives not being in love; despite me shipping it otherwise. (this isn't hate it's more so to help people be more comfortable and have access to more fics comfortably lol. I will not tolerate bigotry towards: polysexuals, polyromantics OR anyone LGBTQIA+. You will be blocked and reported.

Explanatory tangent about why I'm making this and QPPs:

feel free to skip the intro if you already understand lol the entire tangental for the most part anyay.

Into & brief? Personal QPP explanation

I'm writing this in the wee hours of the morning because I was trying to get settled to sleep reading fics... when I remembered that alot of people can't read a lot of Tengen fics as they're not into poly or aren't into women one way or another. It... somewhat bothers me that people get upset, but I also understand where people come from at least, as I just have a different mindset, and I think it could help some people's destress with this???

I am among those not really into women and am picky about polyships in general but esp with y/n. However, I am also aspec, specifically demisexual and demiromantic are the labels I'm most comfortable with in these cases. Why do I mention this? Well...

Among the #Asexual & #Aroromantic community we can feel and have relationships that can be labeled as Queer Platonic. (I imagine it can happen with any sexuality but that's not the point here.)

A Queer Platonic Relationship is a kind of strong platonic love that's stronger than just friendships but without the romantic or sexual feelings of a romantic or sexual relationship. It doesn't have to be between two people of the same sex or gender, it can be oppsites.

Also I'm not expert so do you research, a this is from a personal pov here to try and give an example.

I am in a Queer Platonic relationship of around 10 years now. The love I feel is just as real as others but it's different. In a way it's like how some animals become a bonded pair or set. I would do anything for her, but I would never feel comfortable or desire to kiss her, date her, or "sleep" with her. 🤢 Cuddles are the furthest I'd go and since we don't live alone we'd never do it around my dad, as most people don't seem to understand and I'd rather people not think we are in either of those kinds of relationships, but that's me. Other people in these relationships may feel differently and have different levels of comfort and confidence lol. My QPP and we each have our own wants and desires for other people... specifically fictional men for the most part. So sharing a bed is a nono and while we can share a room as we had to before- we respect each other's need for "alone time." Also snuggles and the like are human and mammalian nature, but society likes to just group it into two small boxes: young child/baby familial or romantic in nature. Which is weird when you think of our needs as a social animal or social mammal, it's not really healthy.

Anyway if you want to learn more, I suggest starting here:

Onto Tengen & His Wives

Anyway the POINT IS, in my head in tengen x y/n situations, tengen x sonas or tengen x other character but not in a poly way, I apply these types of feelings to. Hell I kind of do in canon as well, as for me the love and care he has for his wives is real, but I feel it more in a QPP way as I don't.... have any real vibes that tell me otherwise, regardless of them being canon. It's just how I vibe. I'm not against the relationship by any means as in aus not dealing with him as a main focus (these are private aus and my QPP and I are literally both Tengen simps and also ship him with Kyojuro), Tengen and his wives are very much are all in love with each other. So I'm not really against the actual ship or relationship. I do wish it was more fleshed out tho, I am overally more comfortable with the idea that everyone in the polycule love each other romantically and sexually in this case as otherwise it's uncomfortable for me. 😅 That's just how I like my Polyships.

With that in mind, I am comfortable with the idea of plantonic cuddle puddles, caring for each other, taking care of each other as long as it doesn't become romantic or sexual with the other women or between the trio and Tengen.

So... how do we begin to tackle this? Well look at some of the facts:

They were in an arranged marriage with prior relationships not being detailed whatsoever. Tengen didn't want to have 3 wives to use as tools as his ninja clan ruled. He wanted to save them from that fate as well.

While in canon they all did fall in love with Tengen there's many ways to take this relationship. They have some base level of care for each other be it friends, familial, QPP, romantically or so on.

Example 1:

One thing I like to do is ship the wives in their own polycule, but this is back in the day in Japan 🗾 so I sometimes apply the fact that with a divorce they all would be legally separated due to this, and Tengen whose relationship to them are more platonic, wouldn't do that to those dear to him. Meanwhile adding another wife is still more socially acceptable seemingly in this world albeit much isn't specified so we really just need to guess.

That is an idea I more so apply when reading fics rather than my own story creation.

Example 2:

A similar idea is that they all are in a way "trauma bonded", they went through hell and back together as ninja, and escaped from their clan, that isnt a simple or safe task when dealing with shinobi, ao them all joining the slayer corps makes sense. While they may not love each other romantically/sexually, they all love each other and are loyal to each other. You can take this ship the wives together or only two of them or find them partners outside of the group. Wanna ship Suma and Mitsuri or Makio and Giyu??? Go for it. They can join the family.

In the end...

I can kinda go on and on with tons of different examples, my point is, if possible, open your mind to these ideas, you can enjoy so much more of the fandom this way. Yeah there's no wives of wifeless fics and the like, but most people here are fine with being the 4th wife or an additional Husband or 4th significant other to Tengen. There's nothing wrong with that. But I see people get tense with that or annoyed and I can't help but feel this want to kind of bridge things if at all possible. There's ways you can enjoy many of these these fics, headcanons, scenarios, etc. without having to feel as though you have to be in an actual polycule if that's not your taste or thing.

End Statment

I am a NOBODY on this site, half of my small pool of followers are bots and the others mostly just followed be back/are moots??? I mostly like and reblog other people's things. My creations are mostly between my QPP and I and in our heads and random discord messages as just, we don't have the spoons to write or draw that stuff more often than not. 99% of it is entirely self indulgent lol. BUT there's a tiny chance this could help someone, y'know? Maybe it won't. Maybe it'll cause more problems. 😰😬 I'm not deep enough in any fandom to see drama and ship hate and the like. 😅 I'm more or less a fandom hermit in my own little corner or bubble. I am passionate about this series. I've been hyperfixating on it almost non stop for about a year now. 😅😂 I just want others to enjoy it as much as possible. As long as you're not being a bigot to others. 😌 So please don't think I'm trying to start crap, as long as what you ship is *legal* hint hint, nudge nudge. idgaf what you're into as long as you're not harming or harassing others lol.

Also getting these tangents out of my head makes it so my brain can settle down more lol ADHD is a pain in the ass at times.

[a-mel-tomelts]

Hi! I'm a charlastor shipper and also Ace with some side Aro, I'm still discovering/struggling with my own sexuality, but I can say I'm Ace.

This is a small rant and I speak this for myself and myself only.

There are lots of things I wanna say about the ship but I can simply say I love it. I think having Alastor in a relationship isn't a bad thing, AceAro can still be in a relationship, it's not black and white, it's a fluid spectrum (for me tbh, idk about what others think).

One thing I felt frustrated about the antis or the fandom in general, they used Alastor own Ace(Aro) card to dismiss charlastor. Now we have the bs father-daughter relationship excuse, not to mention, the bi-erasure.

Bi-erasure aside, people comments under charlastor contents with "but Alastor is Ace(Aro, usually Ace)" screams AceArophobics to me, it implied AceAro people can't have sex, can't be in a relationship, can't have a normal healthy sex life .

At first, it didn't bother me much until I kept seeing "but Alastor is ace" under charlastor contents everywhere. Maybe they didn't realised how AceArophobics they are, but that doesn't mean they should weaponized Alastor own sexuality and comment it under charlastor (or any ships!) posts.

It's hurtful how "X is AceAro" commented is, how the antis or the fandom didn't actually care about AceAro and just weaponized the ace(aro) cards of a fictional character to passive-aggressive toward X ships.

Not all Ace people is sex-replused! Not all Ace people doesn't like sex! Not all Ace people doesn't want to be in a relationship!

There are some personal rants I didn't put it here, but in the end, I don't speak for all AceAro. Nor others AceAro with different opinions speak for me.

But this is how I felt about antis and the people with "Alastor is ace" comments, to me, you're all Ace(Aro)phobics without realising it.

Tw//A lot of swears and rude words. I mention word BDSM and word dominated

Not gonna tag it.

I. Agree. SO much.

AroAce people or people on the spectrum CAN be in relationships and CAN have sex. They can kiss. They can do everything people in relationships do BUT they just would feel it differently! Not all people like this but a lot of aroace people I know like Queer-platonic relationships. The secret third thing between platonic and romantic. I have a friend who is AroAce but she's into BDSM! She doesn't feel sexual attraction AT ALL. But she likes the feeling of power or being dominated in a non-sexual way. (If I see people say "Well, then she's not Ace!" I will kick you.)

Even Markiplier, talking about Lady Demitrisu (how do I spell her name), said he would like to be dominated by her but not in a sexual way. It's about power. If people can fuck without feelings as FWB why can't Aces do the same?

I once was asked "Would you have fwb relationships with someone?" And I said "well, I won't be full on board with that but if it will help my friend - sure"

And you know what answer I got? "This is the most asexual answer"

Yeah. Alastor is ace - but ace people can have sex if they know it will please their partner.

Yes. Alastor is aromatic (I won't say on the spectrum.) but he clearly cares about Charlie and thinks of her as charming. So they can have something even if it will be different.

And since when did people care about sexuality?? Why do we care about fictional character's sexuality instead of real people? I know some people ship Vaggie and Angel. I also know people that ship Angel and Valentino. And you know what? If this person is not someone disgusting and they did no harm. Let them do whatever they want on the internet (it's a slippery slope. But I mean that people do whatever they want RESPONSIBLY). Let them ship some the most amoral things. Let them have their own corner as long as they realize the difference between fiction and reality. My policy will mark me as a "problematic shipper" but I honestly don't care. Pro shipping was never about problematic shipping - it was about respecting all kinds of shipping and ships.

If you are not into something - block it. Control your own space, set boundaries and be the one who makes the first move. A lot of times in life no one will stop talking about the things they like just because you don't like it. It will just make you an asshole to them or they'll think of you as someone weird and irresponsible.

Instead, you leave. You don't go to the place that makes you unhappy. You don't go somewhere just to rant and say "this is unacceptable!" When it's about INTERESTS.

If someone is actually concerning you because they CAN and WILL harm someone - then be aware and go hunting. Otherwise you are a boy that cries wolves.

[plazmafields]

Alright, since the discourse has started, let me restate a section from my "Thoughts on Kerry" post a while ago so everyone knows where I stand on the debate:

Tldr at the end

"I do support the idea that Kerry should have been bisexual like in the source material. I absolutely get that bi erasure is a big problem, ESPECIALLY with male characters. However, I respect that in the game you can only romance him with a masc V; I'm not going to mod him to he bi, I'm not gonna ship him with women. I see it the same way I see Cullen from DAI: he is canonically bisexual, just not attracted to my male Inquisitor (in Kerry's case, fem V). Maybe Kerry had such a traumatic divorce from his ex-wife that women just kinda scare him right now. We can see high heels and bras and blush littering his house, so we can assume that at the very least women are still getting naked for some reason or another at his parties. Maybe he prefers men romantically, or maybe he's just not ready to date women again, and we as players should respect that just like we would a real person."

Adding to that, I'm not saying you can't ship Kerry with a femV, but I myself don't.

So let's talk about how attraction can work IRL: Bisexuality is NOT always a 50/50 split. I always just assumed this was the case with Kerry. We see women's clothes and underwear scattered around his house, and I took that to mean he was still having sex with women, just not interested in dating them. That could be due to his unresolved trauma from his divorce, or the unresolved trauma from never processing Johnny's death. Both of those things could make him more inclined toward men.

I feel like the romantic attraction angle is something most people have been overlooking thus far. Just like how there are asexual people who aren't aromantic, there are bisexual people who aren't biromantic. Even if he wanted to have sex with femV, he doesn't want to date women at the moment, for whatever personal reasons. At the same time, he seems to want something more than casual sex.

So, it stands to reason that if Kerry is sexually attracted to either gender, but only wants to date men at that time, and is looking to have sex with someone with the goal of forming a romantic connection, Kerry would only have sex with a man.

Kerry has been with women before, so I'm not saying he never wants to date women. What I'm saying is that DURING THE TIME FRAME THAT THE GAME TAKES PLACE Kerry doesn't want to date women. So, if femV met him before the time of Cyberpunk 2077, then yes they could reasonably end up together.

TLDR: It's not about IF Kerry is sexually attracted to women, we know canonically he is. It's about respecting that he's not looking to date a women romantically at the time of Cyberpunk 2077.

[thedemises]

. . . PEOPLE I'D LOVE TO GET TO KNOW BETTER!!!1! :O

contains! . . .  get to know me a little better! :D, don't whine about the word "sex" normalize it already 😒, a mention of the Tragedy Of The Andes, nothing really too serious! :D notes! . . .  tysm for the tag, my best buddy ring @ringdabel!!!!!! 😭😭 I was going to post this WAY earlier but forgot about it so- 💀 (oh and, I have an ao3 account now >:))) i use the same username as the one I have rn-)

LAST SONG : Farben by Orange Sector.

► Farben is quite a great German song I stumbled upon on YouTube while scrolling for a video to watch out of boredom. I truly recommend listening to it! man, do I love songs from other countries...

FAVORITE COLOR : any shade of any color!

► im sorry I just CAN'T choose a color when all of them are sooooo pretty!!!! 😭😭😭 I mean, most of the them... some are just kinda not my vibe 😃 like neon yellow or hot pink- but honestly, any shades of blue and green are my personal favorites :]]

LAST MOVIE : Alive (1994, Adventure/Thriller Film).

► I watched it by myself cuz my mom REFUSES to watch it bc it's based off an actual incident that happened and it contains acts of cannibalism- I don't remember much of it?- but I assume I enjoyed it, oh and I also watched the documentary(?) of the Andes Plane Crash Incident and it was great (pls don't think of me as a weirdo- I just like watching real crime/murder/etc. documentaries sometimes 😭)

SWEET/SPICY/SAVOURY : any flavor for me really! depending what I feel like tasting rn.

► any flavor is fine with me and I love all of them! I can't really pick what kind of flavor if I was told what kind of flavor would I eat for the rest of my life- spicy is really good depending on the food!! :D

RELATIONSHIP STATUS : Single and ain't looking for anyone 🔥🔥

► I'm aroace y'all if you didn't really know?- (aromantic asexual) which means I really am not attracted to anyone romantically or sexually! I hope you respect that (plus my mom forbids me and all of my siblings from dating anyone 💀 (not that'd i would actually date or have sex at all)

LAST THING I GOOGLED : yokai that sucks blood.

► pls don't ask. :,) the only explaination i could give is that i made a few ocs inspired by yokai- plus i think it'll be kinda cool to make a yokai oc who sucks blood for a possible scenario- but maybe that's just me :,)

CURRENT OBSESSION : Creating OCs.

► okay so- I've gotten a little too carried away when creating OCs cuz now I have like 82 of them and 47 other side OCs.. 😓😦 but am I gonna stop? no! :D i love creating OCs either having different nationalities, ages, genders, traits, appearances, names, origins, and etc.! though I probably wouldn't be using like,, half of them for something, I just think they're neat! :DDD there's probably nothing stopping me from doing this! and if you don't like it, just go on about your day and ignore this!! :DDDD

tags!!! . . .  @gummyshark-soda, @starracoonagain, @freelyhappycycle, @trashiest-person

[fite-club]

"aces aren't LGBT because LGBT is an acronym" please, i'd love for you to go around various queer groups around america, and hell, especially those outside of it, and ask them to agree on one singular acronym. please do it. it will not happen. we say 'LGBT' for conciseness and simplicity, it's not a completed list of all sexual minority identities.

"talking about asexuality and the ace spectrum and how one can consensually have sex while being ace leads to abuse" exactly how? with well informed discussions/education on consent, safe sex, asexuality, etc, how exactly does this lead to abuse? have you thought about this point in any meaningful capacity or are you just repeating the same bullshit people said about asexuals back in 2016? the only scenario i can think of involves a sexually active partner pressuring their asexual partner into sex, which is abusive in ANY case and NOT unique to asexuals by any measure of the imagination.

"aces think sex workers are not oppressed" where has this been said recently? i'm going to need screenshotted evidence of this. because i've seen a number of asexual sex workers and porn artists, using either their own bodies for sexual material, or by writing or drawing pornography. i'm struggling to imagine that there is such a staggering lack of solidarity between people who have sex for work and people who lack a sexual attraction - two extreme ends of a spectrum of human sexual activity that society abhors - that anyone over the age of 17 would actually believe this. have you seen an adult with a job and a life saying and believing this? or has it been a 16 year old twitter user whose only queer life experience comes from their high school gay club?

asexuals are sexually assaulted and pressured into having sex by society's expectations of sex. those experiences and talking about this fact is not saying that sex workers are not oppressed. that is not what any of that means.

and finally...

"you already have non-aces defining asexuality" then why are you continuing to contribute to that problem? why do you believe, over asexuals, that your opinion on a sexuality that you do not identify with is what's correct? why do you feel that you are so entitled to an opinion on a sexuality that you agree is *already* being spoken over by people who are not a part of it? genuinely, why?

brother, every single thing you just said came out of 2016 era bullshit about asexuals. i genuinely want you to question if this discourse is productive for you or anyone else, and i want you to question where your opinions on this subject actually come from. are they based on real-life, first-hand experience? or have you been stuck in the same echo chamber for years?

i don't agree with all of your opinions, but i respected you quite a bit because it seems like your opinions are based in not just theory that you've read/dwelled on, but also real life experience being a transgender man. none of what you said about asexuals is actually based on your real life experience or any theory, and is based entirely on easily debunked bullshit arguments about asexuals, all of which are entirely 'whataboutisms' and making up a guy to get mad at. i can't respect you after your tirades about asexual people. please do some soul searching and reading on this subject.

“LGBT” is the exact acronym anon used. “you can enjoy sex without attraction/you can enjoy sex you don’t want” is rape culture rhetoric. you can ask around, but i’m pretty sure most asexuals don’t consider hypersexual people to be marginalized unless they also identify as ace. sexual assault is abusive in every case and not unique to asexuals. i believe “aces can want and enjoy sex” is aphobic, and “aces don’t want sex” isn’t; i think actual asexuals are being spoken over by allosexuals who want to identify as asexual. yes, my opinions come from real life, i’ve had asexual and “asexual” people in my life tell me about how they do or don’t experience sexual attraction. i’m not making up a guy to get mad at, i’ve had an asexual be homophobic to my face, and i’m sure i’m not the only one with that kind of experience. “do some soul searching and reading” shut up. wanting to have sex with someone = sexual attraction. someone who experiences sexual attraction =/= asexual, period.

[leadendeath]

i don't want to reblog the post because my commentary is not relevant to the subject, so i didn't want to put this in said post's tags. also as i type it turned into a long...? something. vent maybe? i don't even know what to refer to it as. but i've seen a couple of posts recently that have really got me thinking.

as i'm writing this, they both just appeared on my dash. they are this one and this one. i'm definitely going to post this now (i have to) and not just save it in my drafts forever.

Having sex with friends sounds nice! I am pro-that! (pro meaning not anti) for me it would alleviate my fears of hooking up with those I just met or haven't known for years because friends are less likely to murder/kidnap you or give you a disease! (I do not want to die from sex lmao) the con: now they know what i look like and what bodily/physical problems i have that aren't visible to the general public. no. i can't have sex with my friends. my god. it all boils down to my body dysmorphia. literally the mortifying ordeal of it being known

So I think again, like I often do, about my place on the ace spectrum. I usually do not care for labels, don't find them necessary to apply to myself, but it's totally cool if other people have tons of different labels that they use. I am pro-that too! I myself am definitely grey-ace or demi-something. I landed on aegosexual- a disconnect between yourself and your sexual attraction- for a long time. I am never sexually or romantically attracted to somebody I don't know. Not even people on the screen. What if that hot (definition for this context: visually appealing) actor is a dick? Good looks garbage personality? At least you can do research on him. Not the case with "irl contacts" (definition: non-famous and real people who you might actually meet or know in person).

I know that I definitely experience sexual attraction, and want to have sex. Based on that I don't feel quite right calling myself asexual.

I don't LIKE that I feel too bad about experiencing sexual attraction to act on it. There's this weird feeling that's hard to place, but closest to "guilt", I'd say. Disgust with myself.

That time I was propositioned to go back to a con hotel (i turned him down and he listened and respected me and was nice, it's just i stopped myself), or that other time when making out and groping (different guy different occasion; we could've gone further but i stopped myself), or even just flirting and talking about our turn-ons and things we Like with my long-distance online sort-of bf that I had. I'm even hesitating to follow the "after dark" art accounts that I want to follow on bird site because of the guilt and almost embarassment I feel at myself (I'm fully aware that the only reason most people have locked accounts which you have to request to follow is to keep out minors and trolls btw, and i'm certainly neither of those!).

All of this is stuff I want and that's enjoyable to me, but this nagging "don't do that. you're gross. why would you say/do that? you're being weird. stop. stop. stop. you're not allowed to do these things." is always there in my mind. I don't want it to be there, and it's always there.

Now, this doesn't come from religious trauma, like "sex before marriage = wrong and bad"? "gay sex = ultimate evil"? Nah, I was never told those things. I didn't even have a very religious upbringing. These thoughts can't be explained away by any of that. Even my mom has always been like "you can have a girlfriend or a boyfriend! i don't mind as long as you're happy! :)" yknow having that nice accepting approach to that time when I was like 15 and settled on bi for "what i was" at the time. No judgement, no condemnation there either.

It's not real.

When I learned that I have ocd, suddenly I started to maybe have an explanation for these thoughts. Some people's obsessions focus on repetition or contamination. A good part of my obsessions focus on condemnation. I'm scared of it. I take "beating yourself up over something" to the next level. Just like any other person who's familiar with delusions, intrusive thoughts, etc will tell you: knowing it's not real doesn't make it any better. Doesn't make it stop. Doesn't make it go away.

When I could explain this detrimental thought process away by finding this horrible disorder to pin the blame on, I felt freer. I've thought many times throughout my mentally ill life about bringing up my (questioning)asexuality to a therapist one day, and I still will, even more so now. i felt before like I'd bring it up to them and not be able to back it up with any evidence, and just be brushed off? That's a stupid way to think, I know. And a therapist who would really do that is one you'd leave immediately. You don't need evidence to talk about how you feel, that's so silly... but that thought itself comes back around, in a vicious cycle, to my needing to justify myself because otherwise I am Wrong And Bad. jeez. what a way to think. i hate that. will be so glad when i get it under control after 25+ years.

edit: oh ya there's also this. my tags on one of the above posts i never reblogged, sat in my drafts.

my disability is inseparable from my sexuality, whatever it is.

[justcallmeaubs-blog]

Since I haven't had the motivation to make the ej and Jeff edit (I'm working on it I swear, as well as the bloody painter 🥲) I will give you some headcanons of them separately and then as a couple.

★°•Eyeless Jack•°★

Eyeless Jack probably listens to cannibal by Kesha just saying

Eyeless Jack is not as soft as other people stress him to be in my eyes. I think he is nice to people he cares about (even though he probably is still pretty quiet about it even if he really cares or respects you) but to the people either he is told to kill by slenderman or he just doesn't like he will not give two fucks

This goes two ways, if you are someone he is sent out to kill, it doesn't matter what you do he will kill you with no remorse. (unless it's a kid then he feels a little guilty but gets over it fairly fast)

On the other hand... If you are someone he has to tolerate (like another creepypasta) he won't hurt them but it will be obvious he does not like you

He will do things such as take longer to answer a question or not answer at all if someone he doesn't like asks.

But then he would answer it normally if someone he tolerates or likes. Even if it's the same question

He won't wait for the unlikable person leaves either, it would just go like: *unlikable pasta* hey do you know what time it is? EJ:............................ *Likeable pasta* hey EJ what time is it? EJ:........2.......45.......... *Unlikable pasta just standing there* ...the fuck...?

I see him as someone that would also help the injured (especially ticci toby since he can't feel pain so he probably gets regular check ups just to make sure he isn't literally bleeding out) but god forbid if someone he doesn't like gets hurt and he has to bandage them up (lets say nurse ann or doctor smile are busy) he would not only do a half ass job, he would also (depending on how mich he doesn't like them) br a lot more rough with the bandages

It's kinda hard to tell if he likes someone since he's so calm and quiet but there are some ways you can tell

One way to find out is if he will speak/text to you first (but thats pretty rare)

Another way is if he asks you to go and kill someone for kidneys. He is a pretty independent individual and he is not lazy in any way. But, if he trusts you and is too tired to go out and find a human to eat he will probably ask someone responsible. (Though if they say no he might never ask them again)

I believe he is self conscious about how he looks since he sees himself as a monster ever since he got sacrificed. He probably wears the mask 24/7.

You couldn't imagine the surprise one of the pastas got when they went to wake him up one day and he was still wearing his mask

And sometimes proxies like masky or hoodie will leave their clothes on after a long mission but that's out of exhaustion. EJ CHOOSES to do this so when he wakes up he won't have to see his face in the mirror

Because of all of this he isn't one to show you his emotions or talk about his feelings (and it would be hard to tell what he's feeling anyway)

Something that makes him feel better about himself is that Sally likes doing his nails (claws) that includes painting them, putting anything shiny on it and even trimming them.

★°•JEFF THE KILLER•°★

Let's get the basic stuff out the way

Absolute menace

Listens to metal or rock

Best friends with BEN and toby

Probably emo

Has a knife collection

He is (in my headcanon) not aroace or asexual but he does not feel love or intimacy that often. It is possible and he is (again in my headcanon) pansexual

The reason I think this is because he probably thinks "why the fuck does it matter who I'm with? As long as they don't piss me off it's fine"

Anger issues²

Alright now that's out of the way let's get started on the real stuff

Jeff and toby are the most annoying duo

They are the most clever and the most stupid duo anyone has ever seen

What I mean by this is when they pull pranks on a creepypasta they calculate everything, where they are, where they're gonna be at anytime, what they would fall for, what they would and wouldn't believe, who they trust, who they hate, everything comes into consideration for some stupid whoopie cushion prank.

But at the same time they would have a rock eating competition -_-

And when Jeff is by himself he is most likely killing or running away from something jane threw at him

He does have mental breakdowns at night and rethinks his life and how it could've turned out

By the morning though he doesn't regret anything and he goes through this cycle of "pfft why would I give a shit?" To "I'm a horrible person"

When he's on a mission none of these thoughts go through his head tho

Him and Liu do not speak unless they have too and it is kinda awkward

That's all I could think of :/

★°•EJ x JEFF•°★

This relationship would take a WHILE to bloom as they are both so different and I think they would talk but it would be so awkward (even for someone as loud as jeff)

I think the way Jeff would hint at EJ is he would continuously say things like "having a boyfriend wouldn't be so bad huh?" Or "being pansexual is cool" and ej would just....never understand

Eventually EJ would get the hint and after enough of these awkward hints he would just straight up say "if you wanna date just say so"

And Jeff would just stand there like 0_0

Either that or Jeff would get fed up with EJ not getting the hints and he would just yell at him "DATE ME PLEASE!!"

The first week of this relationship would have little to no communication because neither of them expected to get this far

Literally Nina and maybe Ben (teasing Jeff) would talk more about their new relationship than they would

Eventually EJ would ask him out (and probably give him a real beating heart as a gift T_T) and Jeff would just be like: okay 🙃👍🏻

On their first date (shockingly) EJ would do most of the talking since Jeff is horrible with serious shit

And it would be generic questions like "what do you want to do?" Or "how are you feeling?" And Jeff would have no idea what to say

After a couple of these dates they would eventually get used to each other and talk out how they feel about each other and what their boundaries are, what they're comfortable with, what they like and don't like, etc

Idk how long the relationship would last but I hope I pleased you and thank you for reading this! :D (this took me an hour lmao, I really like making these and I plan to make more in the future! Tell me if you enjoyed reading this and what character/characters you would like headcanons for next!)

[shootinwebs]

{Hazbin Hotel Playlist: Deer in Gray Fog}

YouTube version:

Description: Mostly about Alastor being specifically sex-positive graysexual aromantic. These ended up being mostly downer songs, but don't get me wrong, Alastor is proud to be asexual and that part of his life is mostly good.

(Content Notes: aphobia, self-harm, alcohol dependency)

-He does have an incredibly emotional side underneath it all.

-He's not sexually attracted to anyone by their appearance.

-He craves platonic and familial intimacy. Occasionally, sexual intimacy.

-But he's far more interested in the emotional and the trust aspects of sex. He will totally have exclusively sexual affairs with someone if he's found he can seriously trust them enough to take off his perpetually-smiling persona. But he gets very tired of it, very quickly, because most of these people want to have sex with him on a regular basis and he finds that exhausting and sometimes even hurtful.

-If he's seriously sleeping with someone that often, it's definitely an act of self-harm, and involves him drinking over his limit.

-If he actually feels love towards someone, it's not romantic. It's the same way he would love a friend he really trusts.

Some of the songs that I feel aren't simply self-explanatory or that have lyrics I really want to point out:

Stranger (by Goldfrapp) || "Stranger, make me remember you. Taken by the crowd, a tide. It's there, then gone. Do or die." || A gentle but haunting erotic song about a no-strings-attached sexual encounter with a stranger, who is not attractive to the narrator by their appearance but by their otherworldly aura. Pretty much my overall idea of what makes Alastor enchanted by certain people.

Leather (by Tori Amos) || "Don't you want more than my sex? Oh, god, could it be the weather? Oh, god, why am I here? I almost ran over an angel. 'In a sense,' he said, 'You're alone here. So if you jump, you best jump far.'" || Honestly, because of the jazz vibes and the piano riff in the middle, I can totally imagine Alastor singing/playing this. The first line "I'm standing naked before you, don't you want more than my sex?" I think implies a figurative nakedness rather than literal. As in, the narrator has bared their soul to this person, but all the other person can think about and all they want from them is between their legs.

Boxing Day Blues (by Courtney Barnett) || "I know that I let you down. You're not keen on what you've found. I love all of your ideas, you love the idea of me. Lover, I've got no idea..."

All Cats Are Grey (by The Cure) || "I never thought that I would find myself."

Sleeps With Butterflies (by Tori Amos) || "Are you having regrets about last night? I'm not. Is there trouble ahead for you, the acrobat? This girl only sleeps with butterflies. So go on and fly, then." || Alastor being perfectly happy with his aromantic life, and even happier to say "ok! fuck off!" to anyone who doesn't respect that.

Time to Go Home (by Chastity Belt) || "There we were, sitting in silence. Nothing worthwhile to say. Wanting something that would cut deep. Oh... I can't see straight... The room is spinning... I just want to have a good time. I hope you have a strong heart." || Relying on alcohol to help him care less about how someone treats him in bed, craving both exclusively to feel something. But often, for him, the combination of being drunk + bad sex leads to him lashing out (even though he's not even a mean drunk). At best, screaming things at them like, "Don't fucking touch me! Stay away from me!", and at worst, killing them. The second lyric here, I usually interpret as someone being a mean drunk but relying on alcohol to feel something. But with Alastor, "I hope you have a strong heart" would mean he wants to sleep with someone who actually cares about his feelings.

Low Five (by Sneaker Pimps) || "Just change with no real progress, nothing comes to mind. Do you love yourself?" || Desperately craving platonic intimacy and a trustworthy bedroom experience. Alastor also feels that people who are offended by him rejecting them for sex are pitifully insecure and egocentric.

Tear in Your Hand (by Tori Amos) || "I think there are pieces of me you've never seen. Maybe I ain't used to 'maybes' smashing in a cold room, cutting my hands up every time I touch you."

Drone (by Chastity Belt) || "It was just illusion, stuck in my own bad air. I make choices without reason, invite strangers in and leave them. He was just another man trying to teach me something. I never expect much from anyone, so I'm never disappointed and I never have to trust."

Cologne Cerrone Houdini (by Goldfrapp) || "I'm not your kind, I'm not your girl. See, I'm in your car but not your life."

Thea (by Goldfrapp) || "It's a long, long night of waiting. I want you there, I want you gone." || Sometimes when he was alive, Alastor would start crying in the middle of sex, deciding he wanted to stop, and pushing the other person away from him. Because it just didn't feel right. Something was missing.

Dream On (by Depeche Mode) || "Can you feel a little love? What you take won't kill you, but careful what you're giving. Feel the fever coming, you're shaking and twitching. You can scratch all over, but that won't stop you itching." || Can't a potential friend feel at least a little platonic love? The last line suggests a struggle to be satisfied. There have been plenty of times when Alastor has had sex with someone but felt empty or annoyed because the other person just didn't care to make it mutually satisfying or to make sure Alastor could actually trust them.

Laurel (by Goldfrapp) || "Looking for lights, a golden light. Red, red hair and almond eyes. Strange how he's cold behind the smile. An angry mind, don't wait for tonight. Fear is a fog, rolling in and around. Whispers from inside, running out of time." || Alastor just wants friends or a found-family. He just wants to be close with people whom he really trusts (i.e. Rosie). But because of his early life experiences when he was alive, he finds it difficult and even heartbreaking to try to trust anyone. But he has an emotional, sentimental side to him that's desperate to be shared.

All Men Are Pigs (by Studio Killers) || "I believe that life's a film noir. I know the role that you play, so save your cliches. I wasn't born yesterday. Zip it up, Romeos."

"I'm the boy that will heal you, fix you up!" || This song tells the story of a conversation between two people: a person minding her own business and not interested in a sexual encounter, and a belligerent man trying to convince her that he's "not like other guys."

Swamp Song (by TOOL) || "You're a stupid, belligerent fucker. No one even invited you."

Caught a Lite Sneeze (by Tori Amos) || "Boys on my left side, boys on my right side, boys in the middle. Building tumbling down, didn't know our love was so small." || Alastor considers men or any adults who can't keep it in their pants as childish. Acting like boys, not men.

Strict Machine (by Goldfrapp) || He's turned on not by the way someone looks or by romantic feelings, but by the way they touch him, their body language, their tone of voice, and by his own ability to trust them.

My Hands (by Chaos Chaos) || "When you talk to me, there's something in the way. It's when you look at me, so I look far away. I know your kind, you're thinking about it. You think you own everybody. But I do give up, and I do dance with you."

Mama (by Unloved) || "Mama, I did something bad. Mama, I made a mistake. Unlocked my heart, m'aider, m'aider... I let him in, everything went dark. Make it stop, make it go away. I hear your voice inside my head, over and over and over again, 'If you play with fire, you're gonna get burned.'" || His mother was the very first person to be open-minded and to accept him unconditionally, encouraging him to always be himself. It wasn't until after she died that he started putting on a fake persona to protect himself. Because he had no one to confide in, and he doesn't know who he is without her. And that's where his confusing desires for intimacy started and his struggles to understand/accept his own identity. He wouldn't feel the need to subject himself to anything he didn't want if he just had his mother to hug and to talk to. But, she's most likely in Heaven, meaning he will most likely never see her again and never receive her much-needed advice.

[cat-stuck-in-a-tree]

Thank you @penguinsfly for the delightfully (albeit painfully) on-point discussion.

I'm gonna jump in here to elaborate on the 'but it does affect aromantic and asexual people keep it in mind' part of this because I'm seeing some understandable confusion on just how/why that's a thing.

Most of the time, fandom gets to be happily seperate from the rest of life. And that's great--its part of why people like it. You write what you want, how you want. If someone disagrees or dislike it, the rule is they can leave. Don't like? Don't read, don't interact, use the filters. I think we all get this, and get that most of the time its the best and most respectful course of action for everyone.

But here's the thing.

This rule works the vast majority of the time because most fanworks do not run the risk of negetively affecting real people's welbeing in the real world.

Why?

Most fanworks are based on characters who, while unique and very cool in their own ways, are very demographically bland. So you get to start with a relatively blank, not-likely-to-upset-anyone-if-changed charater and then the fandom gets to have at and make things more different in whatever ways they so choose. By their own consensus.

So fanworks usually give diversity instead of taking it. Giving more diversity isn't somethig that hurts people. And the base characters are so overrepresented and similar that its essentially impossible to take their diversity enough to cause harm.

Under these conditions, the 'don't like don't interact' rule works.

Still with me? Now buckle up.

There are --very rarely-- times where what you choose to create in fanfiction can hurt real people, outside of fanfiction. This happens when fanfication takes more diverse charaters and erases the traits that make them more diverse in an instance where those traits are real traits that belong to real people. (Read: you can safely un-werewolf as many characters as you want. But erasing cannon things like ethnic identity, disabilities, or minority sexualities not nearly as innocent as creating them).

Remember-- the fact that a traits is rare and not usually seen in any cannon means that the people with that trait are experiencing real world eraser and being told on a culturally significant level that their traits are undesirable and would, ideally, not exist.

Ergo, if you for whatever reason take a character representing the traits of a real miority and chose to get rid of those traits, from the perspective of that minoriy, you are doing the same thing and telling them they are unwanted and should not exist.

Again: Changing the traits of culturally accepted characters is fine. But you can't change the traits of a cultually erased character or any rare minority to be more mainstream (including mainstream in fanwork), without your actions telling real people experiancing oppression that you would prefer they didn't exist, either.

Okay, but why do my actions have to impact them? Especially when they still have the cannon charater?

Okay, look. You exist and the things you put out into the world exist.

If someone who has lived with significant parts of who they are being completely ignored and isolated from representation for most or likely all of their life hears that there is a character like them who they might actually be able to relate to, they are going to take whatever courage they have to risk being terribly dissapointed, and they will go find that character. And because there will not be anywhere near enough mainstream representation, no matter how good those few seconds are (literal seconds, usually) they will go looking for fanworks as their next step. If not the first because lets be honest, fan rep is usually way better than mainstream.

The hope, of course, is that the majority of the fandom will recognize and accepted the charater's culturally outcasted traits, and take it as an important part of their core characterazation. Just like it is to real people with those traits.

But here's the thing--what if they didn't. What if instead you come the the fandom and find that that trait--a core trait of that charater's being and your existance, identiy, and experiance of the world-- is being intentionally shunned and erased by almost everyone.

There's no way that's not going to hurt. And there's no way that's not going to impact your experience of your identity as a person and as they fit into the world. In this instance, fanworks being fanworks doesn't protect from harm. It actually makes it worse becuse its real people as a collective are choosing to erase you and not a big corrperation trying to make money.

If you have a character who you want to make fanwork of, and they have a trait that real people are oppressed for, or is in any way underrepresented, stop and consider how you would feel if you were someone with that trait, who came across a work that had erased it. Then consider why you want to erase it in the first place.

This is what's upseting aroace and sex-repulsed people about fan portrails of Alaster. Not because of people making or not making any specific work, but because of the collective message those works sends to the people who identify with cannon Alastor's sexuality.

Case in point: I went to check out AO3 because aroace sex-repulsed rep. And unholy mother of toadstools.

Look, the evidence isn't subtle that Alaster is much more likely to be a sex-repulsed asexual than any other identity. Anyone on the hell no side of intrinsic willingness to have sex can recognize that discomfort. And yeah, some people are going to want to explore other kinds of being ace, not being ace or aro, etc. But 'some' and 'literally the vast majority' are different things. Further, two thirds of the people aware of sex-repulsed asexuals people activily choosing not to accept that identity, even when--again-- it fits best at this point-- that's not a great message to send to the people about their sexuality. Or, y'know. Existance in the world.

Even in the asexual community, being aroace, asexual, or sex-repulsed (alone or all together) are extremely isolating and underrepresented experiences, and its incredibly difficult to find any representation (Alaster is the only one I know that seems to get it right even given how little its refrenced). Surfice to say its a bit disturbing to look up the closest description you have of your sexuality and find that its largly being erased. Not surprising. But. Out of 22,519 works only 4,790 tag Alaster as asexual (which is great ace rep, but not great considering over 3/4ths of the content ignore it (or at least didn't tag).

But here's the really troubling part: For a character who is most likely sex-repulsed (and is cannon ace, likly aro, and absolutely not shown in any way to want sex), just under 300 works, total acknoledge that. Out of over 20,000. Add aroace and get rid of clearly explicit content and...84 works total on AO3. (aroace without being sex-repulsed is also 84)

Total works:

Works tagged Asexual:

Works tagged Sex-repulsed and Aroace

I'm under the impression that very, very few people are at the far 'black' end of the ace spectrum, are sex-repulsed by nature, or are those things and aromantic. Even within the ace community, it can feel isolating and far outside the norm. And frankly, 84 works is still pretty exciting considering the usual zero.

I'm not saying we should have more works or less works. It seems much better to be greatful for what we have.

And at the same time, it does illustrate the point that's worth reflecting on.

Additionally...here's the bigger, much more disturbing example:

That's a pretty blunt 'we'd rather you not exist'. Especially counting the numbers. Also, weirdly specific. Why so much interest in denounceing a lable for an identity thats...almost never acknoledged or represented in the first place. Roughly 2,000 versus 200. And over half of that 200 is not of the sort of work sex-repulsed aces typically enjoy reading so. There's that, too.

This leads to another part of this that's got aro and ace feathers ruffled: Bad Ace rep. (Aro and not). The good news i there's also a decent amount of great ace rep! Bad news is the vast majority…isn't.

Listen, er all know there's a lot of ways to do ace rep because there's a lot of ways to be on the ace spectrum, and a good few to be asexual as well. But a component of being anything ace, is that sex et al. can be happily done without most to all of the time. Plus being asexual is a wildly different experience than being allo because of all the ways sexual stuff is tied into cultures and gender and other identiy stuff. Its really not the same experince as being allo, give or take sex. So if the point of the plot is and tags is primaritly 'how to get the ace charater to do sex while still saying they're ace' consider just not. At least that way folks can filter properly.

Especially for sex-repulsed people, ignoring or erasing a sex-repulsed charater's signs of discomfort around sex because you want to make things sexual and think its harmless...tends not to go over well. It runs too close to real life.

Look, I'm aware that if there's a term to unite fandom its probably incoragable --and that that's genrally something to be proud of-- and I think we all understand that people will be people and will keep up creating wildly not-in-character charaters--but l hope this helps more people understand the reasons discussions about Alastor's portrale in fandom keeps being brought up by extreemly ruffled aroaces, and that there are, perhapse, reasons its not always great to erase a queer minority character's representation in favor of turning them the fandom version of straight.

Hope this helps

I unfortunately saw something I didn't want to see and that was my last straw. I'm fucking doing this.

Let's establish this first. Alastor is stated in the show to be asexual that is not up to discussion. He is also very heavily implied in the same conversation to be aromatic. 'An Ace in the hole' being used in context of him being with Charlie is also implying his aromanticism.

VIDEO

If that's not enough then here is Viv speaking about his romantic orientation. It's pretty clear despite the fact that afterwards she said it's okay to headcanon whatever (it's not but I will get o that later) that he is written purely as an aro ace character.

On top of that going by Alastor's interaction with Angel from the pilot and the first episode it is clear that he is sex repulsed. Not only that but on the fandom website he is stated to be touch averse with two sources which you can check out on the website.

Hazbin hotel wiki, Alastor page

Now we established that Alastor is canonically Asexual, Aromantic, Sex Repulsed and Touch Averse

As I also am all of the above I'll try to explain everything to the best of my ability as simply as I can.

Aromanticism and Asexuality.

I'm probably targeting the audience that knows those terms but regardless I will explain it anyway.

Aromantic - people that experience little to no romantic attraction towards any gender

Asexual - people that experience little to no sexual attraction towards any gender.

Little to no

Asexuality and aromanticism are spectrums in which people can feel certain attractions towards people but those attractions are less occurring or are defined by personal connection.

Diagram from AVEN website

However some people are at the end of the spectrum, they never felt attraction and that's valid. Alastor was stated to be aroace he wasn't written as demi or as gray he was written as aroace as in the end of the spectrum. His repulsion and not giving shit about romance or sex speaks for itself.

Representation

I do understand that everyone wants to be represented but it's so important to understand that aroace people are one of the most underrepresented queer groups in the media.

And I'm not here to scream about how I want my fav character to be just like me I don't care for it I'm way too confident in my orientation to rely on that however I'm tired of explaining to people what asexuality and aromanticism is just to receive 'are you sure' or 'you'll change your mind' or 'its not real' or the community favourite 'you'll find the right person' no I won't I'm not looking thank you very much (I just smile and nod to be polite and I'm sick of it).

'Harmless' buts like: 'He might be on the spectrum', 'AroAce people can still feel attraction' hurt the final outcome for all the people on the spectrum not only strictly aroaces because it allows people to write one shots with 'Demi Alastor' that falls in love in 2000 words because he is 'demi' (spoiler alert: they don't understand what that label means). It's just a cover, an opening, sneaky way to disregard his orientation, feel good about themselves and move on. Newsflash there is no moving on for aroace people it's our life.

Shipping

Shipping is just harmless fun right? Usually yes but not in this case. In the same way its not okay to ship gay characters with genders they are not attracted to.

It's erasure and since there is much less people identifying on aro/ace spectrums then there is gay or bi people our voices are being silenced. Not to mention that gay people received support from entire LGBTQIA+ community over the years in contrast to aro/ace specs who to this day are told that we are 'not queer enough' or 'not oppressed enough' often by other queer people.

And finally... FINALLY we get cannon Aro/Ace character that is clearly not interested in romance and sex. Character that beats stereotypes of boring and timid aro/ace people and what's the first people do? They ship him. Alastor's storyline provides so many points to be explored like 'what is his backstory', ' what's about his deal', ' how does he fit in in the found family trope' , 'does he care about hotel guests' yet people choose to write about the only thing that he is not interested in. As a heavily repulsed person that used to be horrified about the fact that I'll have to fall in love with somebody at some point before I found out what aro/ace is I find it repulsive and trust me he would too.

But Viv said it's okay!

Its the same point once again. What if Viv said that it's okay to ship gay Angel with woman. She doesn't have authority to say shit like that.

Queerplatonic relationships

I can't tell you not to do it I don't think he would be necessary interested in it but for fuck sake do your research and try to understand what queerplatonic means before you use it as a cover to shamelessly ship him. Respect the fact that he is sex repulsed and touch averse and you're fine.

Why can't you just avoid it?

First of all I shouldn't have to. Alastor's orientation should be respected in the fandom like any other orientation is. Second of all I've tried. I tried to only look up AroAce Alastor tag I've blocked over 80 people on tumblr alone (I just counted) to avoid to see anything that could trigger me and I'm not talking about slightly shippy posts or fanarts I'm talking about full blown disregard towards his orientation. Guess what it didn't work!

Archive of our own where do I start. I've used this website for over a decade and I could probably count days I didn't go there on my fingers. I'm fluent in AO3 I know which tags I should block. I know how to skim thorough the summary and tags to see if I'm interested. I've seen shit I'm a shipper I've been on ao3 for ten years but never had to mentally prepare myself to face queerphobia as I click on the tab.

Just use aro/ace Alastor tag.

I do and let me tell you people can't tag for shit or they just pretend to be clueless at this point. Besides see this?

there is more ff with Alastor/reader (disgusting) than there is Alastor with his canon orientation and to play the devils advocate for arophobic people there is more Angel/Alastor then his stated in the show sexuality. I understand that fandom goes back before the show was aired but Viv confirmed his orientation back then too.

Summary

I could go on and on bout different issues and maybe I will in the future but I'm not wasting anymore of this weekend on it. I'm ready to answer any questions as long as they are respectful.

I'm aware that he is a fictional character, it doesn't affect him in any way whatsoever but it does affect aromantic and asexual people keep it in mind.

If there are any mistakes grammar related I'm not sorry I'm fluent in English (not my first language) but I took 3h nap in between and I'm sleep deprived.

Have a nice day.