#i mean it's also just plain more fun. i enjoy getting more experience with coding.
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orcelito · 2 years ago
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The professor of my coding class is kinda hilarious. He's like mid 50s white dude, grew up on a farm, HATES technology (constantly saying how he can't wait to retire and smash his cell phone so he only has a landline), often mentions stuff like "not to be offensive but-" and then says things that are objectively true / not actually offensive (about general cultural differences regarding tech and such), and At The Same Time despite being a painfully white farm dude he's still somehow incredibly conscientious of other ppl's cultures - well traveled, well educated, and clearly very considerate of other countries. This dude talks about countries I have barely even heard of without blinking, citing some very specific cultural stuff, even using some words that he COMPLETELY butchers the pronunciation of bc he is Very White, but at least he's trying.
It's honestly very entertaining. Get you a white american farm dude who dreams of going off the grid, but is very good at coding / tech in general And is also very well traveled & generally educated about other cultures. And you get my professor.
Every class is a new hilarity, let me tell you
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aquilamage · 1 year ago
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Rain world is really good but the difficulty is defo one of my biggest gripes. Like, it sets out to be a hard game, and it is, but there are straight up some areas you may fall into that are so hard to get out of people suggest just restarting! Which feels weird and bad, to me at least. The wall jumping also drives me crazy, I feel like I can only sometimes get the rhythm right for it. I’ve found tho that if possible, putting a stick in the wall as a kind of ‘check point’ helps (you may already be doing that tho haha)
I am all for a game being designed to challenge the player in whatever ways because you can genuinely get some cool things out of it, and it's fine if that's considered the 'default' mode. But there's two caveats to that.
There's a difference between well-balanced and reasonable difficult and stuff that's hard either just for its own sake without thinking about whether it's enjoyable to play/overcome or hard because it's not designed as well as it could be. I'm by no means an expert on game design but having parts of the game where the common advice is just "yeah if you end up here just restart the game" that's not like. a glitch. Doesn't seem the greatest to me.
People have said this way more eloquently than me but even if the intended experience is for the game to be difficult, even extremely so, putting in features you can select that make the game literally as easy as possible should just be the default because that just means there are now more people who can or will play the game and it doesn't actually take anything away from people who want to play it with the highest difficulty.
Literally I think my game experience would be so much improved if there was just an option for more forgiving wall-jumps or even just a plain wall-climbing option. (I don't have that much platformer game experience overall but like. I've done all of Hollow Knight's platforming challenges except the White Palace and I'm almost done with chapter 7 of Celeste and iirc those are at least considered somewhat challenging as platformers. So I think I'm allowed a little bit of saying this is related to how this game's mechanic works). And if there were other options to make things easier I might take those too and that's fine! Because otherwise you have me sitting here contemplating whether I can keep playing a game I genuinely like because of it just being too much stress on me to be healthy probably! And y'know, maybe not fun enough to be worth it, I don't know yet.
It's like how about halfway through playing Subnautica I got too frustrated with being attacked and just put in the cheat code that let me not be attacked by the monsters. Even turned off oxygen a couple times when watching that made me too claustrophobic and it was great because then I just got to concentrate on playing the game and enjoying it; and it didn't feel like a lesser experience.
And yeah depending on how popular the game is overall and how many people might feel the same there may be a mod for this kind of stuff out there. But! As I said I have the switch version and I shouldn't have to buy the game again and play on a platform that doesn't work as well for me (or at all depending on how much it demands of a computer) just to get a version that's more accessible!
All that aside I do still think it's a neat game with some great design aspects to its gameplay. Wouldn't be talking about this so much if not or contemplating other options to experience it; I would've probably just dropped it.
(Oh yeah I definitely have been doing the spears-in-the-wall to facilitate climbing. All the time, including some spots where I made a ladder of several because searching for more spears was easier than doing the climbing. Super appreciate the tip though because if I hadn't that would've been SO useful to know)
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sugareey-makes-stuff · 1 year ago
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This is definitely a long time coming, but I finally wrote a text only fic for Sterek, complete with a stylized AND plain text view for reading! Also my first long fic that I've written since...I don't even know when (aka it's NOT a drabble or ficlet!!). This is also belated from July, but for reasons you can read more about below the cut. Inspired by @yearoftheotpevent's July prompt "stars," as well as sniperjade's Masturbation Midsummer Bingo 2023, using the square "I can't anymore," and Summer of Cum 2023 prompts "creampie," "come marking," "precome," "come swallowing," "coming untouched," and "coming in pants" (yeah, there's definitely a spicy theme here :P).
Title: Feel You Breathing (<- on AO3) Rating: Explicit WC: 8.4k Tags: Texting/Sexting, Established Relationship, UST, Porn with Feelings, Porn With Plot, Fantasizing, Teasing, Banter, Filthy, Dirty Talk, Masturbation, Idiots in Love, Writer Derek Hale, Bartender and Graduate Student Stiles Stilinski, Business Trip, Flight Delays, Coming In Pants, Coming Untouched, Nipple Play, Light Dom/sub, Bad Pick-Up Lines, Humor, Shopping, Sex Toys, Kink Exploration, Werewolf Mates, Anchors, Love Confessions, Pet Names, Romantic Angst, Stiles AND Derek are Little Shits, POV Alternating
Summary: Derek: So, you need a distraction. Stiles: Maybe Stiles: It’d be better if you were here to help me with that. Stiles: ;D [Or: Sexy things start late one night when Derek gets a text from Stiles and escalate from there. A few secrets are revealed along the way.]
Some of my lovely Sterek friends know I've been dabbling in and out of writing text fics since last year (2022). Easier said than done 1000%, I'm going to tell you that right now. It only took me 3 tries to get it right! (And yes, it means my other 2 WIPs need to be reworked, le sigh.) It's one thing to write a text fic, but it's a completely different beast to style the damned thing with AO3 skins while making it as legible and accessible as possible. I thankfully know how to code in CSS and HTML, but it took me quite a long time to create a custom skin template that I liked and could reuse while getting the look and feel just right for our idiotic boys and the overall Teen Wolf world. Texting and sexting is legit an art. There are so many ways to approach how to write a text because each person does that differently. There's also intention required when using emojis, figuring out how someone would react to things, and hell, even playing around with timestamps and timezones is important. A text fic isn't just about words. All the tiny details add up and make a new experience. I think I took a full week to QA this whole fic because I wanted the aesthetic to look good, and it was worth it! It was nice to make something for myself, which let me write dialogue and banter and a lot of fun things I normally wouldn't had this been a different kind of fic. Super grateful for having a Write-A-Thon sprint weekend, which motivated me to finish the bulk of this baby up. And when I think about it now, this labor of love was originally supposed to be an experiment for me to play around and learn more about coding intricacies. It was supposed to be a short Porn without Plot thingie (but uhhh, it's definitely Porn with Plot and Feelings because that's the way it is). 1-2k words somehow became 8k+ words. No regrets though. It has been a long time since I've felt good about writing something this long and doing something different than the norm. It has been such a blast coming up with all the texts in this fic, because they're humorous and spicy with the usual banter and sarcasm we love between Derek and Stiles. But hey, there's some romantic angst too (they might be texting and using words, but they could do better, of course). Anyway, I hope you give this a read when you have a chance. Enjoy!
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yoshimonster · 1 year ago
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Blog #7: I’m Back After About a Month of Not Posting
Hello again world! I should try to sound excited once more for this grand comeback post, which I believe will just be as ordinary as the last time I posted.
So, life moved on, I guess – I actually did my exam for circuit again which I was really glad to have had a chance to do it again considering how stupid (by stupid I mean I was just being a plain idiot and not doing things I already knew how to do) I had been the first time around. It was definitely really easily passable/more than passable if I am being honest and also this was sort of proven with the make up test I did. I did way better and got 85.5% actually compared to the abysmal 38.25% (and even managed to score an extra point during my remark, but the cut off was 40%) and you wouldn’t even know it looking at my transcript. I guess I should have been really mindful the first time around and definitely could have achieved a Credit/Distinction if I really tried hard. Same thing also happened with a coding subject I did last semester, just plain not understanding the vibe caused me to pass by 2 points rather than if I actually just read the question/understood the topic much better I would’ve been fine and potentially scored much higher like a Credit/Distinction. But yes, I’ll just stop with the recap here – I definitely have mentally moved on given the new semester has well and truly started. My maths still remains one of my weakest subjects and I definitely need to majorly brush up on it for this semester’s algorithms course I’m taking. Again, I’m lightening my course load and taking less subjects in general and less subjects with exams (aka group project courses) so as to really brush up for this/also apply for more jobs.
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I actually found out about this opportunity recently via my parents and it sounds extremely exciting given the capability/calbre of the job program. As I was putting my application together I just realised how much time I wasted on experiences that could have been something more – sort of like when you handed something so valuable yet you don’t know what you are actually holding. I think you can liken this to going to a museum and being handed some really valuable artwork (from the time era) but disliking it because you don’t understand it or even care to understand it. I’m hoping this analogy makes sense – but wasted potential essentially.
I have enjoyed putting things together this time around, much more than the usual job application anxiety I have because I managed to know myself so painfully thoroughly these past few years that I almost feel numb talking about myself. It’s such a weird combination of acceptance and fear. I have no clue what will happen going next but I do feel much better these days. I think that’s also sort of reflective everywhere – situations/people that were really disappointed in me have improved slightly at the very least and I’m pretty thankful for that. I don’t really want to take it for granted again.
Again, the Taylor Swift saga is well and truly over, I don’t think my sister or I are getting tickets unless we find them on some resale website or friends we know hand us those tickets. I’m sure it will be really fun for people who do get to go, especially since I’ve been seeing posts everywhere of people purchasing tickets in other countries – spots in Asia are particularly popular from what I see. I also sent in my email to a local radio station as a last-ditch effort in the middle of this. I’m definitely not going to get it, my reasoning to get the tickets was way too generic I would say.
But yes, this month has been fun – no major friendship drama, though I’m sure it will start up again as quite a few of my friends are graduating soon. I also finally had the chance to catch up with many of my older friends within a short period of time since I was studying all of July essentially. The highlights being: Barbie movie broke a billion, Korean food is bejewelled, and I probably won’t be going to that Thai place again. Socially, things are still able to maintained somewhat too and I’m really trying to (still) figure out a balance.
-yoshimonster-
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superhero--imagines · 4 years ago
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Part 1 Here! / Part 2 Here! / Part 3 Here! / Part 4 Here! / Part 5 Here! / Part 6 Here! / Part 7 Here! / Part 8 Here! / Part 9 Here! / Part 10 Here! / Part 11 Here! / Part 12 Here!
A/N: Shout out to @ideas-for-you-to-adopt​ for inspiring/writing a lot of the headcanons used for the “Bella Suspicion” part of this chapter!
I’m posting this a day early, because, well I’m flakey like that
* You spear another piece of pineapple, your teeth grinding together
* “I think that sounds perfect!” Lauren squeals lightly grasping Bella’s shoulder, Bella gives a small smile in return.
* You know what isn’t perfect?
* The fact that nothing is going according to plan.
* It’s already a month in and NOTHING has happened. You stab another piece of pineapple, sticking it into your mouth
* You’ve hung back in the school parking lot everyday for a MONTH, you were even late to cheer practice once, just to see if the “Tyler Van Accident”  happened.
* Only it never did, and you didn’t know why until Lauren confided that she and Tyler had been hooking up lately.
* As in hooking up at her house after school before her parents came home.
* Of course it’s not going to happen when Tyler’s ditching his last period to drive to her house
* What a mess
* You chew the pineapple carefully, just like a human would. Because even though Bella knows LITERALLY NOTHING. She somehow suspects everything.
* You watch her from the corner of your eye, making polite conversation with Angela about biology next period.
* The amount of questions she has about you is ridiculous
* How did you meet Edward? How does your family know the Cullen’s? Where are you adoptive parents now? If they’re back in the states why haven’t you gone to live with them?
* It’s literally never ending. And that’s just her trying to poke holes in your story.
* You’re not even going to start with all the stuff she’s commented on your physical appearance
* “Hey don’t you think it’s weird they all have gold eyes?” You had heard Bella quietly ask Jessica when she thought you couldn’t hear
* “Not really, they’ve got like six kids, so when one kid needs something more of them do too. (Y/N) told me Alice wanted color contacts so Dr. Cullen just bought some for all of them.”
* And then the week before that, while you were doing a stunt at a basketball game Bella said:
* “Aren’t they like, too strong?” You were lifting up a girl all on your own.
* “Oh yeah- I guess you never saw the video, apparently they’re jacked.” Conner says, with a shrug.
* “Yeah they heard working out helps with stress when they were like 12 and just never stopped.” Mike adds absentmindedly
* And if that wasn’t enough she’s even said this a few weeks before that:
* “Don’t you think it’s weird how beautiful they all are?” Lauren wrinkles her nose, at the time she had gotten used to Bella but she still doesn’t seem to like her very much
* “Not really, I remember (Y/N) wasn’t all that pretty freshman year, they used to wear these really dorky glasses.”
* You had almost started to forget how good you had it, after you did all the leg work in the last two years to establish that you were normal -just kinda quirky- you had just started to enjoy the pay off. A little more lax with your appearance, wearing clothes you liked, doing more solo routines in cheer.
* Only for little Miss.Curious to show up
* Now you have to try extra hard to look human again. And not just you, the entire coven does, because when one of you falls under suspicion you all do.
* Rosalie’s been making her hair look messy every so often to give the illusion that she’s having a bad hair day, Alice wears a retainer every so often, even Emmett pretends to need the bathroom more than he usually does.
* This morning you even had Rosalie do a fake pimple on your jaw.
* If Bella wasn’t going to be your best friends’ future wife, you think you might just hate her.
* You kind of sympathize with Rosalie in the book now.
* “Hey (Y/N) are you in?” Conner asks nudging his elbow against yours.
* “In for what?” You mumble, spearing another piece of pineapple. Another downside is now you have to eat at lunch. Otherwise Bella starts asking why you never eat and everyone gets really concerned and starts force feeding you
* God, all those years of establish you have low blood sugar and acid reflux induced nausea for nothing
* “La Push beach, we’re all going this weekend.” You perk up at the mention
* Finally, something’s getting back on track
* “Can’t, cheer stuff.” You mumble, shoving your food around your plate with your fork.
* You don’t miss Bella’s meaningful glance on your mostly full plate.
* Oh great, you can practically see the question “don’t you think it’s weird how they never eat anything?” Forming in the inner corners of her mind
* “What about you Edward?” Lauren flutters her eyelashes and you have to stop yourself from rolling your eyes.
* Lauren’s still annoyed that even though they’re hooking up, Tyler hasn’t made anything official yet
* Alice told her flirting with another guy might help.
* “He’s not going either.” You say before Edward can even open his mouth. He doesn’t say anything just gives you a questioning look and a smile.
* Looks like he’s finding everyone else’s thoughts more interesting
* “Are you guys going on a date?” Jessica waggles her eyebrows and on the other side of the table Bella sputters.
* You roll your eyes
* “No Jessica, but if I can’t go have fun neither can he.” Technically you both are forbidden to go on tribal land but whatever. “Best friend code.”
* Also you’re pretty sure Edward and Emmett are going to Yellowstone to eat bears or something, like a couple of heathens
* The thought of eating straight out of bear, no idea what they’ve eaten or where they’ve been doing their business, makes you shudder. 
* You did mention to them both that if they happen to find an orphaned bear cub somewhere to bring it back. You’ve been wanting to experiment with bear blood. 
* “Best friend code.” Edward repeats slowly, and the look he gives you makes your stomach flutter. And it’s not because you just ate half a salad.
* You’re knocked out of the look when Conner bumps his knee against yours
* “Well that’s a shame, I was looking forward to seeing you in a swimsuit.”
* So Conner’s been flirting a lot with you lately. Kind of weird, your best guess is that he was hoping to date Lauren, but now that she’s kinda seeing Tyler, you’re starting to look good.
* “Maybe you should have a pool party at that fancy house of yours then.” The group laughs but Conner just smirks
* “Whatever you want babe but-“ the bell cuts him off and you give him a consolatory pat on the arm.
* You move to throw away the leftover food on your plate, walking with Edward
* “We’re ditching right?” You ask him as you toss the plate into the trash.
* “Yeah Mr. Barnes is doing his blood type experiment today.” Like he even needs an excuse to skip school. “Do you want to go to the bookstore or something?”
* You shake your head, that won’t do, when Bella faints Edward needs to be there so they can fall in love
* “Wanna just hang out in my car? We can listen to that new Debussy CD I got.”
* Edward gives you a small smile, like he’s not really happy
* “Whatever you want.”
* Wait what’s up with that.
* “Hey, (Y/N)!” Bella calls out for you and Edward grimaces.
* “I’ll meet you at your car” wait he’s not going to stay here? If this was a dating video game he’d be the kind of player that wasted all the capture flags and then complains when they end up all alone.
* He leaves just as Bella gets to you. She spares a fleeting glance in Edward’s direction, almost looking sad as she watches him walk away before she looks to you
* “Are you heading over to biology?” She really is cute, like a puppy. She must have been hoping to get a little closer to Edward. 
* You almost feel bad for not warning her what with her issues on blood.
* “Nah I’ve got to finish my trig homework so I’m going to skip.” You fake a yawn.
* Oh, before you forget
* “I actually got you something.”
* You hand her a carefully wrapped gift bag, compliments of Rosalie of course
* “Vitamins?” Bella asks, her eyebrows threading together
* “Yeah, it’s like a vitamin powder, you just add it to water. We bought a big family pack so I thought I would share some with you.”
* Also because you’re 100% sure she’s anemic.
* Part of the reason you like the way she smells so much is because of her anemia, if it’s just the peach scent you can probably contain yourself. 
* You wave goodbye and Bella looks down at the package in her hands with a goofy expression. She hugs it to her chest before her expression pinches.
* “I should have offered to let them copy my notes” Bella murmurs to herself. Smacking her forehead and walking to biology.
* When you manage to sneak out to the parking lot through the gym doors, you see Edward leaning against your car, looking bored as he looks to the tree line
* “Why didn’t you sit inside? You look like a douchebag.”
* “I would have if someone had given me the keys”
* Like that’s stopped him before
* You unlock the car, letting it start with a hum before you pull out your trig homework
* You weren’t entirely lying to Bella, you really hadn’t finished you homework
* Edward pulls out a book from his bag, you’re not ashamed to say you’ve gotten him super into “The City of Ember” series
* “Hey why did you walk away when Bella came over?” you’re only half curious, mostly just trying to make conversation. “You don’t hate her do you?” You add with a laugh.
* The mere thought of Edward Cullen hating Bella Swan is laughable.
* “Yeah I do.” 
* You find yourself coughing from the sheer shock. 
* “You mean she frustrates you because you can’t read her mind.” Edward has spared you a concerned glance when you started coughing, but has turned his attention back to his book
*” No I mean I don’t like her, and I don’t like being around her.” He doesn’t look up from his book as he says it. 
* “But why?” Yeah she’s a little plain, and she’s still pretty shy even though you’ve been hanging out for a month and all those damn questions
* But she’s got good taste in books, and she’s pretty straightforward.
* She’s not the type of person to go behind your back, if you did something to upset her she’ll tell you straight to your face.
* Honestly she’s a lot like Angela, minus the hidden cunning nature.
* Edward eyes narrow and a heavy sigh escapes him. His head tilts back to rest against the passenger seat headrest.
* His neck is so long and white. The color of freshly fallen snow. You can’t help but think of how pretty it would look covered in hickeys.
* Like poppy’s blossoming in the snow. 
* Can vampires get hickeys? Would it just be like black instead of red since none of you really have blood anymore. 
* “I just don’t like-” He cuts himself off when his eyes meet yours, they seem to shine brighter for a moment, and you tilt your head. This feels like a meaningful look. 
* Edward sighs and looks away.
* “I just don’t like her vibe.” 
*”Vibe? Are you an Edward shaped imposter?” you see him mouth ‘Edward Shaped Imposter’ as you both laugh. 
* “Where did you learn to say these things?” He asks between laughs. You mock gasp.
* “The real Edward would never ask me that because he’s too afraid to know! Who are you really? What planet are you from?” Your hands move to his face, his face is as smooth as marble, lingering warmth. You leaned in without thinking about it, only a few inches away from him. 
* You’re so close you can smell him. He always smells good, like something ancient and profound. Rosemary and argon oil. 
* Your hands are still on his face and he’s grinning. 
* You gulp
* You’re trying to think of another ridiculous imposter joke you can make wen you catch a familiar head of blond hair through the window.
* “Is that Mike and ... Bella?”  
* This is a lot sooner than you thought, it hasn’t even been ten minutes yet.
* Edward looks almost bored as he follows your gaze. 
* “Yeah, looks like she made herself sick, she’s - what’s that word for when people are afraid of blood?” 
* “Hemophobia?”
* “Yeah, that’s what she has.”
* You wait for a second, releasing his face from your hands, but instead of moving to open the door he slumps back into his seat, eyes focused on his book. 
* “Don’t you think we should go help them?” He shrugs. 
* The f*cking criminal just shrugs. 
* WHAT THE F*CK IS GOING ON?!?!
* Human or not, there’s no world Edward wouldn’t at least think about helping someone who’s in trouble. 
* You’re starting to think this really is an Edward imposter. 
* You watch Bella lean on Mike, stumbling down the crosswalk to the nurse’s office in the next building. 
* You can’t watch anymore 
* ‘You know you-” You words finally get Edward’s attention as he looks up from his book. “You are wasting all the capture flags!” You shout before sliding out of your car and jogging over to Mike and Bella
* “Mike! What happened?” He’s so surprised to see you his grip on Bella goes slack and she falls out of his side hold.
* “Oh crap!” 
* You rush to catch her, swinging her into a princess hold.
* What was Mike struggling with so much? She’s not very hea - oh right you’re a vampire.
* “Are you alright, I know she’s kinda heavy.” Well that’s not very nice to say about a girl, besides she’s pretty skinny. Can’t be more than 120 pounds. 
* “It’s no problem, I do it for cheer are all the time.” You do a fake grunt as you pretend to get a better hold on her. 
* The movement jostle her awake, her eyes fluttering open. She’s still in a dreamy state, her eyes are unfocused. 
* “(Y/N)?” 
* “Hey buddy, looks like ya fainted, squeamish around blood huh?”
* “How do you know we were doing the blood type experiment?” Mike asks.
* Oh crap. You were skipping, you weren’t supposed to know that. Even worse you brain can’t seem to come up with a valid excuse.
* “Alice told us about it, (Y/N) used to be squeamish around blood when we were kids, didn’t want to take any chances” You let out a sigh of relief when you see Edward walking towards you. At least he’s not completely heartless. 
*”Then why were you skipping?” Mike asks scratching his head. Edward shrugs
* “They can’t go to class, then I won’t go either.” And then the criminal looks you straight in the eye and says with the cheekiest smile imaginable:
*“It’s the best friend code”
* Oh f*ck off Edward. 
* You almost want to scoff when he takes Bella from your arms and into his.
* SO now he wants to care about the capture flag. 
* You let him take her though, You swear you see her stiffen and frown when he holds her.
* That can’t be right, she seemed super relaxed when you were carrying her.
* “I-I’m fine I can walk.”
* “No you can’t.” Edward bluntly says.
* Even when he gets to capture event, he says all the wrong things. You sigh as you walk behind him. Only to notice another set of footsteps by you. 
* “You can go back if you want Mike, Edward won’t kidnap her or anything.” He might throw her into the lake though.
* Mike shakes his head. “No it just seems wrong to not make sure she at least gets to the nurses office.” 
*You smile, he really is a kind boy. 
* “Also I’ll be damned if Bella gives Edward all the credit.” Well mostly kind.
* You get to the nurses office, who seems incredibly flustered with both you and Edward in such a small space.
* She seems so preoccupied keeping her wits about her as she checks out Bella and deals with your presence that she never asks why three people had to escort one person to the nurses office.
* “Well your blood pressure is a little low, since you fainted I would suggest you go home. If you want you can take a nap in here until school’s out.” Wow, where was a nurse this generous when you were in school.
* Bella, the beautiful moron, shakes her head.
* “No it’s okay I’ll go back to class, I don’t want to take a zero for the assignment” Well that’s noble and responsible and all. But what does she think is going to happen when she goes back to class?
* She’s going to see some blood again and faint. Not that you can be mad, you would probably have to go the the nurse too if Bella ever managed to prick her own finger
* “Bella you really shouldn’t,” You settle your hand on her shoulder pushing her back onto the chair. “You just fainted you should lie down, or go home or something.”
* Her eyebrows thread together, mouth pulled in protest. 
* “I don’t want to impose on any-”
* “It’s not an imposition, I want to!” Her mouth parts, then closes, stretching into a fine line. You look to Edward who’s avoiding your gaze and seems very irritated.
* Enemies to lovers trope it is.(Though you’re not sure if this counts as enemies if only one person dislikes the other)
* “I’m going to drop you off home, come on.” You pull Bella up by her hand, leading her to the parking lot. 
* “Wait what about my car?” 
* Oh you hadn’t thought about that. 
*Hmmm in the original book Alice drove her home. But Alice doesn’t really do anything unless there’s something in it for her, or if she wants to.
* Also you’re pretty sure when she ditched today when she found out that people were pricking there finger on campus. She claimed it was for Jasper, but you’re pretty sure there’s a sale in the Nordstrom in Seattle.
* Edward would rather get the flu than drive Bella’s ancient truck.
* Which leaves only one option.
* You toss your keys to Edward who catches them with one hand.
* “Edward will drive you home in my car, and I’ll drive your car behind him.” 
* “What about Rosalie?” He grumbles.
*“What about Rosalie?” Why is he being so difficult right now? Doesn’t he realize you’re doing this all for him!
* “You’re driving her home since Emmett and I are leaving for Yellow Stone as soon as school lets out.” Oh right the bears. Cr*p.
* “It’s not a big deal, I’ll drive back to school after we’re done and you can go your way and I’ll go mine.”
* You can tell Edward doesn’t like it, but he just sigh’s climbing into your car and then promptly getting out of the passenger side and sitting in the driver’s side.
* The dork forgot he had to drive the car.
* You’re dying laughing as Bella leads you to her car.
* “It’s the blue one.”
* Her truck isn’t all that bad. It’s old, but in a kind of retro way. It’s powder blue, with only two doors and no backseat. 
* You climb in, turning the engine and hearing it purr. Well it’s more of a roar, but it’s not terrible.
* You’re surprised when Bella climbs through the passenger side door. 
* “Um, you’re not going to drive with Edward?” She looks at you like you just asked her to recite the Fibonacci sequence. 
* “Why would I go with him when you’re the one driving my car?” Okay, that’s fair.
* You sigh, why does nothing ever go according to plan.
* Maybe it’s for the best, Edward doesn’t seem to be in the best mood. Not that this is good either, she’s sitting so close to you, her peachy scent fills the small space of the truck and you feel lightheaded.
* It’s less than a ten minute trip, no need to get dramatic. You’re pretty sure you won’t kill her just because she smells nice.
* “Soooooo... what do you want to talk about?” You ask as you turn out of the school, this car is super slow compared to yours, you’re pretty sure it won’t go over 50 mph.
* Bella fidgets beside you, playing with the ends of her hair. 
* “So are you and Edward...dating?”
* You laugh so loud you actually start coughing. And then you laugh again. 
* “No-pfff- no We’re uh- we’re not dating.” You finally manage. 
* “Why is that so funny to you?” She asks, genuinely confused.
* “Well it’s just outrageous you know?” How would that even work? You can’t even picture it. Edward getting all hot and bothered because you’re wearing an oversized sweater and glasses. You flirting with him all over the house in front of Carlisle and Esme. Edward signing up for a sport just so he can see you in his letterman.
* It’s all...impossible.
* And yet, there is one thing you can picture. 
* Edward by your side, he’s almost golden brown, his eyes bright green. He points to the living room, and in there are Alec and Jane, both of their eyes blue as they argue over who’s turn it is to watch TV. 
* Maybe if you were human, if you had met in a different world or a different time, that would be something you could have. 
* But it is what it is
* “Edward and I have been friends for a really long time, we’ve just seen too much of each other to find each other attractive like that.” 
* Bella looks like she doesn’t believe you but she doesn’t say anything.
* Wait what are you doing? This is the perfect chance to talk Edward up!
* “But you know Edward is a real stand up guy!” It leaves a little too forcefully, a little inauthentic.
* “Oh is he?” She doesn’t sound too excited to be talking about this.
* “I know he’s got one of those face-”
* “Obnoxiously handsome?” She spats 
* “Like he thinks existence is a curse, and the world is evil and everything is terrible -” Wait you’re getting off track. “B-but he really is a good guy!”
* You bite your lip, as Bella tells you to turn into a subdivision. 
* “You know after- after I was adopted,” After your parents died. “I was really lonely, I had a family that loved me and anything I asked for but I didn’t really have anyone to talk to” Oh god, why did you choose this story to pick? “Edward was probably the only friend my age I had for years.”
* She straightens up a little bit, a curious glint in her eyes.
* “Really?” You nod.
* “Yeah he would come by every Monday and Wednesday,” You still remember the crunch of the snow under your feet as you both walked to the barn. He always asked why you didn’t just run, and you always told him because you liked the way you could see your breath hang in the air,
* “He could have been out that time, hanging out with other people,” More well adjusted vampires, who hunted instead of harvesting small amounts from animals they raised. “or chasing girls and playing sports, but he stayed with me.”
* “He always made me feel safe, and I’m sure whoever is lucky enough to end up with him will feel that way too.” 
* “I think you’re giving him too much credit” Bella finally says, you smile at her
* “what do you mean?” 
* “Well, who wouldn’t drop everything to hang out with you?” You can’t tell if she’s being genuine or if she’s bitter. Your eyes meet hers and there’s a twinkle in them. ”My house is the one on the left, the one with the magnolia tree.”
* You come to a stop in front of the house she mentioned, shifting it into park, and handing her the keys. 
* You don’t say anything as you climb out of her car. You see Edward stopped a few dozen feet behind her truck, your jeep still on. 
* “Thanks for driving me home” She smiles at you, a real smile that reaches her eyes. It’s nice.
* “No problem, it gave me an excuse to ditch school too haha.” You both stand in awkward silence. Neither of you moving. 
* Well damn what are you supposed to do now?
* “Oh, hey do you want me to bring you your homework or anything?” 
* She perks up at that, reaching into her pocket
*  “If you don’t mind, could you text me what page he homework is on for trig today?” 
* “ Oh for sure! No problem at all” You take her cell phone in your hand. It’s a white sidekick, with a picture of a cactus on the back. She must have gotten it when she moved.
* You can’t help but wonder if she has any friends she misses. She spent her entire life in one community, sure Phoenix is a pretty big place, but she must have had friends, people she sat with at lunch everyday, girls she had known since childhood, sleepovers where they whispered about boys they had crushes on.
* As you hand her phone back, your contact information saved in it, you can’t help but wonder who this person in front of you is. You know her, but at the same time, you know absolutely nothing about her. 
* “See you Monday!” You wave goodbye as you get into the passenger side of your car, and Bella waits on the porch until you and Edward leave.
* Edward’s got that look on his face.
* “Edward why are you mad?” 
* “I’m not mad.” He grumbles and you raise an eyebrow. He sighs.
* “You’re going out of your way an awful lot for that human.” He says as he turns back onto the highway.
* “It’s just the right thing to do Eddie.” 
* He shakes his head, his mouth pinched into a frown
* “Just be careful, I don’t know what that one’s thinking, she could be planning to burn our entire coven for all I know.”
* You roll your eyes, yeah you bet Bella who weights exactly 115 pounds, and has anemia is single handedly planning to bring down the entire vampire race. 
* “How about we make a deal, I’ll promise not to rock the boat while you and Emmett are gone-”
* “Why do I feel like I’m going to regret not covering my ears?”
*” If you promise to bring me back a bear cub - an orphaned one.” He gives you a look you don’t quite care for.
* “You want me to kill a mother bear so you can have a bear cub?” 
* “No of course not! I’m just saying- Emmett doesn’t really look before he kills  so if he kills a mother bear, just make sure you bring me the cubs.” 
* “Why do you even want a bear? How are you planning to take care of it with all those deer around, they need a lot-”
* “Yes Dad I know it’s a big responsibility, don’t worry I won’t make you take it on walks or anything.” 
* Edward gulps hard, one hand detaching from the steering wheel to cover his mouth. 
* Wouldn’t it be positively sinful for you to be underneath him, whining ‘daddy, please’ in that breathy voice of yours and-
* Edward.exe is broken. 
* “Dude you really need to get your shit together before you go on your trip, we’ve been parked for fifteen minutes and your foot is still on the brake.” You say as you get out of the car
* He hits his head against the steering wheel.
* “Yeah, I really do need to get my shit together.” 
Tags:  @moonlights27 @thebluetint @the100thtwilight @awesomebooklover17 @oneofthepotterheads @smileygirl08 @imdoingathingmom @iconicgguk @yrawn @alyciaswhore @little-horror-show @wicked-watering-can @lazydreamers @ xxxmuxxx  @ideas-for-you-to-adopt​​ @poisoinedhope @maryleigh8796​ @moose-squirrel-asstiel​ @hotmessgoodness​
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renegadewangs · 3 years ago
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Van Zieks - the Examination, part 6
Warnings: SPOILERS for The Great Ace Attorney: Chronicles. Additional warning for racist sentiments uttered by fictional characters (and screencaps to show these sentiments).
Disclaimer: (see Part 1 for the more detailed disclaimer.) - These posts are not meant to be taken as fact. Everything I’m outlining stems from my own views and experiences. If you believe that I’ve missed or misinterpreted something, please let me know so I can edit the post accordingly. -The purpose of these posts is an analysis, nothing more. Please do not come into these posts expecting me to either defend Barok van Zieks from haters, nor expecting me to encourage the hatred. - I’m using the Western release of The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles for these posts, but may refer to the original Japanese dialogue of Dai Gyakuten Saiban if needed to compare what’s said. This also means I’m using the localized names and localized romanization of the names to stay consistent. -It doesn’t matter one bit to me whether you like Barok van Zieks or dislike him. However, I will ask that everyone who comments refrains from attacking real, actual people.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5
And here we have the second half of The Unspeakable Story, because the case was so long I had to split it into two.
Episode 5: The Unspeakable Story – Part 2
When we last left off, Gina was allowed to testify about the omnibus murder two months ago. Sure enough, she talks about what really happened and how she was threatened into lying in court of law. The judge realizes that he made a grave error in letting McGilded walk. Again, I'm not sure why he's only realizing this now when that trial ended in disarray, with the entire gallery shouting about whether it was or wasn't a gross miscarriage of justice.
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I'm giving Van Zieks an additional scumbag point for this remark, since Ryu had already admitted to his wrongdoing and, despite Van Zieks's repeated warnings of 'are you sure about this', brought the details of the falsified testimony up himself. Don't pretend to be understanding about the position this puts Ryu in if you're going to be a jerk about it afterwards, Van Zieks.
Some shenanigans and Gregson whispering to Graydon later, Scotland Yard returns with the small box! Turns out it's a music box! When suggested that the court should listen to the music on the disc, Gregson interjects and unconvincingly claims the music box and disc are unrelated to the case. Ryu objects to say that the disc is fundamentally important for understanding the motives of the crime and Van Zieks, on his own accord, chimes in that the prosecution has no objections. When Gregson continues to stammer that the disc is police property, Van Zieks says:
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“But it is policy of this prosecutor to leave no avenues unexplored. And you, Inspector, have no jurisdiction here to prevent that from happening.”
So Gregson and Van Zieks are definitely not buddies. Since Gregson is a key player in this case (and I mean that in a negative way, since Gregson is actively hiding important knowledge from the court), the fact that Van Zieks is turning a deaf ear to his pleas does in fact make Van Zieks an accomplice of ours in a roundabout way. Only for this particular context, though. The point is, so long as the prosecution continues to agree with the defense about unveiling key pieces of evidence, Van Zieks is helping Ryu achieve his ultimate goal. Also it's just plain fun to watch Gregson panic. We're having a jolly old time in this courtroom!
Unfortunately, when the box is played, there's no music. It's just weird tones. So Ryu is confronted with the question of whether the music box's sounds are relevant to the case or not. Naturally, I chose that they aren't relevant to see what would happen. I don't know why I expected any different than this:
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“When you speak, you must mean what you say. ...Or be prepared to suffer the consequences.”
Penalty from Van Zieks! He's right though, I never learn. Okay, so let's say the tones are relevant. Van Zieks jumps onto that like a cat pouncing on a mouse toy, of course. He wants to know just what that relevance is. Ryu says that the chimes aren't necessarily music, and Van Zieks pursues relentlessly. “Well, now that you've told us what they are not, I'm sure the court would like to hear what they are. Do enlighten us, my Nipponese friend.” This is all very standard fare, of course. In any Ace Attorney game, the player has to outline their reasoning in steps, which means the prosecution and/or the judge will continue to ask for elaboration until all the details are out in the open. Of course, Van Zieks has to be a jerk about it as he follows it up with the words “Surely you have an idea in mind? Because if not... It will be the death of your ill-formed argument!” Eesh. Harsh wording for such a simple concept of 'your argument is void if you don't tell us exactly what you mean'. What's bothersome about these moments is that often, the player already has an exact idea in mind, but the game's dialogue will beat around the bush a bit more and really rub it in. (example: Iris telling Ryu at this very moment that the music box isn't broken at all and it's meant to play these particular chimes.) But because the player isn't given the option to just figure this out for themselves and then gets scolded by the prosecution for 'taking too long', naturally the player may get frustrated.
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I'm getting there! SHEESH! It's not my fault Iris is distracting me! I had the evidence ready to present like two minutes ago!
Anyway, Ryu finally links the chimes to government messages being intercepted and leaked to other countries. These messages are usually telegraphed in morse code, so it should be obvious where Ryu's going with this. Van Zieks looks horrified at the notion of the disc containing secrets in morse code. Still, alongside Ryu he works through the logic of what happened and how McGilded would've been involved in this. Graydon, who works at a telegraph office, is of course the prime suspect for intercepting those secrets and that's the reason why he broke into the pawn shop to recover the disc. Graydon is outraged by the accusation, saying “I've had to stand here in silence while that pretentious foreign lawyer has been prattling away!”, but Van Zieks cuts him off with an objection.
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“The prosecution demands the witness testifies... in response to the accusations brought by the defense!”
It's Mrs. Garrideb all over again! Yes! So just to reiterate, the prosecution has nothing to gain by doing this, the way I see it. Ryu can't actively prove any of his theories, he's got no hard evidence. The only thing Ryu can do at this point is have Graydon testify and hope that he'll slip up; and Van Zieks is supporting this notion instead of demanding to see this currently non-existent evidence. So Graydon testifies, the topic of morse code comes up again, and we get a lesson in the basics of how it works with the dots and the dashes.
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Surely it can't be that a prosecutor in an Ace Attorney game is being passive aggressive again? Anyway, turns out the music box doesn't play morse code at all because instead of dots and dashes, there's only one of the two. The testimony continues on to address that Graydon's last name used to be Milverton, a fact which causes Graydon to react very heavily and attempt to deny it. Van Zieks subtly reminds him that this effort is futile, since Graydon is a communications officer attached to civil service. His personal details would've been thoroughly checked when he was appointed to his position.
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I enjoy it when Van Zieks finally gets turned around to point his sharp finger and sharp words towards people who actually deserve it. Yes, he's ferocious and a somewhat horrible person, but Graydon had this coming for being, y'know, a literal murderer who tried to frame a teenage girl. Van Zieks even reminds Graydon of the same sentiment (“it would really take no time at all for the court to subpoena those records”) later when Graydon continues to deny that Mason Milverton was his father. Good boy, Van Zieks. You're learning that not all British citizens are upstanding and it's okay to accuse some of them of wrongdoing. Because remember, in earlier trials when Ryu would indirectly accuse witnesses (or juror no 4) of lying or criminal activity, Van Zieks would overreact with an “HOW DARE YOU, SIR” of sorts. But not this time, oh no. How dared Graydon?
So with the relation between Graydon and the victim of the omnibus murder proven, we've made headway, but still not enough. So long as the music box chimes seem irrelevant, we don't have the full story to pin Graydon down for anything. For this reason, Ryu gets back on that topic and insists it's very much possible for the disc to contain secret messages. Van Zieks is still not quite convinced.
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Covering his insecurities with fancy speech, I see. Van Zieks can act as smart as he wants, but the brutal truth of the matter will always be that he's not smart enough to take evidence in his own two hands and flip it over or open it up. Ryu's the only one who takes the practical approach, opens the bottom and finds out that the music box can actually play two discs at the same time. One for dots and one for dashes, which means there's a second disc out there. So with this out in the open, it's time for everyone's favorite type of Ace Attorney tennis: The back and forth truth reveal! Ryu and Van Zieks take turns in detailing the chronology of Graydon's illegal dealings with McGilded, with negotiations apparently turning sour in the omnibus two months ago, and thus the brickmaker met his end. McGilded attempted to hide the stolen disc by sticking it in his coat and pawning it at the pawnshop, but Graydon found out about this, etc. We've all played the case, we all know the story.
Graydon ultimately admits to having been at the crime scene that night, but still refuses to admit he worked with McGilded or stole government secrets. (Okay okay, ALBA, your denial is too powerful to let this game end, have it your way.) Ryu surmises that only Graydon could have shot Windibank, as he would've been the third intruder holding a third gun. Graydon flips this logic around; now that he's admitted he was at the crime scene that night, he can also admit to 'what he saw' as a 'key witness'. He claims that he saw the moment Windibank was shot by the pickpocket and he took the third gun afterwards, and he's ready to testify about it. Van Zieks, who should technically be jumping at the opportunity to hear decisive testimony for his precious guilty verdict, is instead not amused at all.
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“If it is shown that your claim is false, you will have incriminated yourself as the killer.”
And these are some very telling lines once again. Why would he warn Graydon about this if he didn't have reason to believe those claims would be proven false? Why would he think Graydon could incriminate himself as the killer if he were 100% convinced that Gina is the culprit? He must know by now there's a strong chance that Gina is innocent and Graydon is the real killer. But sure enough, Graydon testifies about watching through a peephole and seeing blood spatter over the coat. Blood which he couldn't know is there unless he saw the murder happen. So the judge wonders whether the coat can be tested for blood and indeed, Van Zieks confirms that it can. A German scientist discovered that test 'very recently' and it's already being used in several courts around the globe because this test was actually, y'know, verified in the field of science.
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“Ideas are no use to us here. In science, as in law, theories must be proven before they stand.” “We could shatter all vestiges of doubt within minutes!”
rip. To be clear, it doesn't seem as if Van Zieks actually knows for certain there's blood on the coat, because how could he? His insistence on the blood test doesn't seem to be motivated by hope of 'cornering Gina because the blood will definitely be there'. Rather, I think he just wants to either prove or disprove Graydon's testimony so we can all get on with our lives. Plus, I think he may want to flaunt these 'official methods' just to diss (S)Holmes's methods some more. While waiting for the results, Ryu is allowed to cross-examine the very suspicious peephole testimony. Despite Ryu being the one to press Graydon at every statement, Van Zieks will occasionally chime in with questions of his own to get some clarification. Which is funny, because the prosecution isn't the one who has to cross-examine witnesses. Van Zieks should technically be staying out of it. The fact that he's butting in to needle Graydon some more is just... I don't know, it's another one of those very telling moments, I suppose. Again, he probably already suspects that Graydon is the real killer.
The cross-examination is put on hold when the test results finally come back, confirming the blood on Gina's coat. Ryu still tries to save his case by saying the blood actually belonged to Mason Milverton, but that's obviously a very dangerous route to take.
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“Did you not argue fervently for McGilded's innocence? And yet now that the man is dead... You brand him as a murderer? Your conduct shatters any shred of respect you may have earnt for yourself in this country!”
We all know he was a murderer for real. Van Zieks knows this more than anyone in the courtroom (well, except maybe Graydon). Besides, Gina testified about this like fifteen minutes earlier. To be frank, the fact that Ryu is admitting to this openly should actually warrant more respect as opposed to breaking it down. Because, remember, Van Zieks gave Ryu several options two months ago to blindly defend McGilded and instead of taking those opportunities, Ryu instead admitted he couldn't say for certain whether there was foul play happening. I think what's going on here may be that Van Zieks is emotionally conflicted. He was already buying into the theory that Gina is innocent and Graydon is the real killer, but the blood on the coat threw a wrench into it all. Graydon hypothetically could only have the coat knowledge if he'd seen it happen, which makes Gina the real killer after all. With something so conclusive, any belief he might've invested into Ryu's integrity has just been 'betrayed' and indeed, if Ryu's integrity is in doubt, anything else to come from him will also be relentlessly drawn into question. That doesn't just apply to Van Zieks; all the jury members who were on Ryu's side before immediately, unanimously vote guilty. Van Zieks assumes that there will be another Summation Examination, as has become the norm.
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Ryu grows desperate, because changing the jury's minds is going to be exceptionally difficult now. Thankfully, our hero (S)Holmes appears! That mischievous scamp!
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“Detective (derogatory)”. I think it would've been an interesting plotline if (S)Holmes actively investigated the Professor case back then, perhaps even at Van Zieks's request, and failed to find the killer in time to prevent Klint's death. That would explain why Barok now thinks so badly of (S)Holmes and the amazing detective he's described as in the novels. Unfortunately, the second game never really addresses whether (S)Holmes played a part in the Professor investigation and if so, why it ultimately came down Genshin's duel and Gregson forging evidence to 'close the case'. You'd think that if (S)Holmes investigated the deaths, he and his partner would've tracked down the real killer long before things could escalate that badly.
Anyway, (S)Holmes asks for five minutes of the court's time to pass some evidence on to the defense. Van Zieks begins by saying that the trial has already taken up many hours of the court's time. So 'having spent that long already...' Gregson cuts him off to agree, saying that since they've spent so long already, they don't want to waste even more time. Unfortunately for him, that's not what Van Zieks was about to say at all.
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So he's fully on our side again! Hurray! All well and good, but he does still fling one of his chalices later to signify the five minutes are up. (S)Holmes thanks Van Zieks for allowing the brief recess, the reply being that he needs no thanks, since “the die is cast”. In other words, they've already reached a point of no return here. At first this seems like a very cryptic dismissal of gratitude, but what Van Zieks is actually saying is that the jurors have already made up their minds and settled on guilty. “Any attempt to alter the verdict now would be utterly futile.” Which still doesn't say much about whether Van Zieks believes they're headed in the right direction, it only says that he doesn't believe Ryu can convince them to change their minds this time.
Surprise! Ryu doesn't have to! When (S)Holmes came into the room in disguise to deliver the lab results of the coat, the cross-examination of Graydon was actually suspended. This means that, by law, Ryu has the right to continue that cross-examination instead of turning to the jurors for the Summation Examination. Van Zieks suffers through his damage animation (which has been rarely seen by this point in the game and honestly, it's a delight to watch), calling the whole matter absurd. This is the law, Ziekie boy! Deal with it! So with this final chance granted, Ryu presents the catflap device to debunk Graydon's testimony about the peephole. Susato tampered with the crime scene and made that cat flap mere minutes after Windibank was shot. So if the cat flap wasn't there before, how could Graydon possibly have witnesses what he claims to have witnessed?
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Oh, he's thrown off now. He's got no idea what to believe anymore. I can't blame him; who would expect a trial to take a turn like this? We're getting close, but Van Zieks has one more obstacle to throw our way, as all prosecutors do. How can we prove that the peephole flap was made after the crime as opposed to before it? “When was the peephole cut? The prosecution demands proof of your answer!” Again, this is par for the course. This is what any prosecutor would demand. Evidence is law in Ace Attorney world and Van Zieks needs tangible proof that Ryu isn't just a 'lying traitor' like Genshin was. Naturally, we have proof and Van Zieks is the one we have to thank for that.
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Considering Van Zieks is the one who showed up to court that day with a big stack of photographs from that very same 'infernal camera', this line will never stop cracking me up.  So now we know for sure the peephole was made after Windibank was shot! Unfortunately, in submitting evidence we now also know one other thing.
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To be fair, Susato didn't know it was a legit murder scene until the cat flap was created and they could see the body. Up until that point, it was just a scene for breaking-and-entering, along with (S)Holmes shooting. I'm sure that was taken into account when discussing the punishment later on, though. Anyway, we've proven Graydon's perjury, but Van Zieks insists we still haven't quite proven that he's a killer. Luckily, Ryu's already two steps ahead of Van Zieks here. Since we've proven that Graydon was lying about what he saw, the question is now how he knows about these things to begin with. He couldn't possibly have seen the peephole with his own eyes, so how did he know it was there? And how did he know about the blood on the coat? Gregson once again decides to interject, asking Van Zieks for 'a word, please'. He wants to leave the courtroom and return to the station to put in his report.
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“You will remain exactly where you are until this trial concludes.”
Heeheeh. Brutal. So with Gregson forced to stay, Ryu is free to insinuate that information about the crime scene must've been leaked to Graydon. And since Graydon had no idea he'd be summoned to court to testify on the murder, he could only have received the information after arriving at the Old Bailey. The only person with the opportunity to pass that information to him (in the middle of a trial, I might add) was Gregson. Gregson immediately barks that he had no reason to leak information about the investigation to someone like Graydon, but we know that's not true. Ryu suggests there was a deal.
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I really enjoy this particular expression on Van Zieks, and it fits especially well in this context. While he usually looks very calm and cold on the surface, he now looks outwardly ferocious, slightly unhinged. Perhaps even in pain. This is the face of betrayal and humiliation. We learn in the second game that Van Zieks had already suspected Gregson of having dirty hands when it comes to the Reaper, so I expect this insinuation hits extra hard now. It's confirming to Van Zieks that Gregson is indeed not above dirty tactics. He doesn't take it lightly, of course. “With the stakes so high, the prosecution is not prepared to listen to baseless charges. It is incumbent on the defense now to present evidence in support of this diabolical claim.”
So let's do it. It all comes down to the music box disc and the stolen government secrets, of course. Gregson admits that he was ordered to retrieve the stolen information and do it “on the q.t.” Top secret mission, this one, though earlier on it was implied to have been ordered by Stronghart. Van Zieks concludes that Gregson objected so heavily to the disc being used as evidence because he knew of the information on it. Gregson replies that he realized there was a possibility of it. Since we know the music box plays two discs, the deal must've involved this second disc. Van Zieks is now thinking ahead very quickly, here. He asserts that since Gregson is a Scotland Yard detective, he would've approached this deal with extreme caution and not simply taken Graydon's word for it. He would have asked for the article in question to be handed to him immediately and so, it stands to reason the second disc is in the courtroom at that very moment. Gregson doesn't take lightly to the accusations and when Ryu suggests a cavity- sorry, I mean body search, Gregson agrees to it without so much as a flinch. Suspicious behavior, to say the least. But this means the body search is allowed and everything rests on the outcome.
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“If, following the search of the inspector's personal effects, no disk is found... You will be deemed unfit for court service, this trial will end and my country's government will formally demand of yours that you are severely reprimanded.”
But Van Zieks, if Ryu were deemed unfit for court service, who would you face in hectic turnabout trials? He's your one true nemesis now, remember? The judge agrees with Van Zieks's sentiments, but Iris has some very interesting insight: “You're just threatening Runo because you're scared!” Since Iris is one of the most clever characters in the games, we have to examine this statement further. If he's scared, then what's he scared of? My guess would be the firm, undeniable confirmation that Gregson is willing to screw with a fair trial and let a killer walk free. Yes, he was ordered to do this by his superiors (STRONGHART), but it doesn't change that Gregson is throwing an innocent girl under the omnibus to get what he wants. And again, keep this in mind, Van Zieks already held suspicions that Gregson had something to do with the Reaper curse. But they were friends once; Gregson was Klint's friend. There's a difference between suspecting an old buddy of being up to no good and hard evidence that it's true. What adds credence to this being the reason of Van Zieks's fear is one of the game's recurring themes: You mustn't look away from the truth, no matter how blinding it is. No matter how painful, it needs to be acknowledged.
So the game asks whether Ryu still insists on the search, knowing there'll be grave consequences if nothing is found. By this point I was so tired that I didn't choose any of the other options and went straight for the correct answer: Search someone else! Gregson's being so cool about it that we can already surmise he doesn't have the disc on him, but he did have the perfect opportunity to hide it on the taller Skulkin brother earlier in the trial. So Ryu insists on there being a search, and Van Zieks says:
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“But your typical Nipponese stubbornness may well land you in hot water this time. Perhaps the lesson will do you some good.”
This sort of implies to me that Van Zieks has also realized the disc isn't on Gregson's person. He's known the guy for a very long time, and so, he'd also know that Gregson is easily flustered with zero poker face skills. There's no way he could look so cool if there was a chance of the disc being found in his pocket. So this is the point where Ryu reveals that he doesn't want the search done on Gregson, which does succeed in ruffling our dear old inspector. Gregson starts accusing Ryu of having lost his mind and the court shouldn't have to put up with this nonsense, with the gallery also erupting into chatter. Iris snaps and tells everyone to be quiet. Ryu's just doing what he was told to do and having the courage of his convictions, so they should all respect that and listen to what he has to say. The judge admits that the court is in awe of the defense's convictions and I could write an entirely different essay here about Ryunosuke's growth throughout the games, but I won't. Point is, the cavity- sorry, I mean body search of Nash Skulkin is allowed. Gregson absolutey has zero poker face without a doubt, as he tries to object to the search in the name of Scotland Yard.
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“In this courtroom, only the prosecution and the defence have the authority to object.”
Gregson tries to sputter his way out of this, but Van Zieks says: “I have no idea what forces are in play that might influence your actions, but personally I have no intention of obstructing the course of this trial.” (Gregson literally said that Van Zieks needed “Stronghart's paw print” to get more details on the top-secret investigation into McGilded's shady activities, but sure. No idea what forces are in play. Okay.)
Pin 'im down and use the rubber glove, bailiff! The missing second music box disc is pulled out of Nash's jacket and Ryu explains why he knew it'd be found there.
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Uhhhhhhhhhh. I think what Ryu's trying to say is that Gregson would rarely fly into such a rage that he'd assault someone physically, but... This man absolutely loses his composure all the dang time. Just ask the fish n chips he keeps aggressively chomping down or scattering over his shoulder. He doesn't strike me as a composed character at all, so to say he behaved “extremely out of character” is kind of off to me. But whatever, it proved our point so I'll let it slide. When the judge asks why Gregson didn't just submit the second disc as evidence the second he got his hands on it, Van Zieks surmises that if the information on the disc were revealed in court, it'd be problematic. Gregson once again confirms he's working under direct orders from the ministry (STRONGHART) to keep the stolen info on the down low. But now we've got a problem. Neither Graydon nor Gregson will admit that they made a deal for the disc (it just magically appeared in Gregson's possession then, sure) and so long as they don't admit to that deal, we still can't prove Graydon lied about his testimony in regards to Gina being the shooter. The judge is ready to turn the matter over to the jury for their final learnings, and if these people had any common sense they'd all vote not-guilty because Graydon is getting away with his nonsense through a sheer technicality. Even so, Ryu intends to put the squeeze on Gregson by playing the second disc along with the first to determine whether there's truly morse code involved. Either Gregson admits to unlawful dealings with a witness to protect state secrets, or those state secrets get played out loud for everyone to hear. Gregson warns him he'll be making an enemy of the entire British government if he lets those secrets out into the world. Ryu insists he'll stop at nothing to do his job and protect his client, no matter who he makes an enemy out of. Van Zieks pours himself another glass of wine in silence.
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Yeah, a real shrewd, calculating man. Uhuh. Again, I want to take a second here to point to the symbiosis we usually have between prosecutor and lead detective. Even in the case of Fulbright and Blackquill, with their unique circumstances, they still worked in tandem. You'd never catch them bickering about whether or not to present a certain piece of evidence. It's fascinating to watch Van Zieks consistently ignore Gregson's pleas. Speaking of which, let's have a leg slam to shut Gregson up.
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“I'm a prosecutor. ...I'm no Scotland Yard puppet. In this courtroom, my duty is to the law. So let me propose a toast. To uncovering the truth... by fair means or foul.”
YOOO!!! Get him, Zieks! There's absolutely no denying now that Van Zieks is 100% on Ryu's side. He knows that playing the secret message will cause Gregson to cave and admit to his shady deal. And once we know for certain Graydon's testimony is one huge sham... Well, as Van Zieks already said earlier, Graydon will be incriminated as the real killer.
So the box plays for about ten seconds with actual morse code this time and Gregson cracks like cheap porcelain. When Ryu confronts him with how this dealing would lead to the defendant being wrongfully accused of murder, Gregson just kind of shrugs it off. On its own, you might be thinking Gregson is a scummy asshole for this, but there's some very important factors to keep in mind here from the second game. First of all, very simply, Stronghart ordered Gregson to retrieve the info 'no matter what' and Gregson isn't in any position to refuse at this point. But then there's the Reaper's curse, which is way more important. Even if Gina were found not guilty, she'd still have to die. Not just die; Gregson would have to arrange for her death. I doubt he enjoys being in that position, so it's easier for him to just willfully sabotage the trial and have Gina be executed by the government. Some of the blood would still be on his hands, but at least he wouldn't have had to orchestrate some elaborate death trap himself, leading to all the blood on his hands. (Cool justification, still second-hand murder.)
Uh, wait, this is a Van Zieks essay, not a Gregson essay. So anyway, after Gregson gets choked by Graydon and nobody steps in to help him, we finally get the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Graydon has a semi tragic backstory and he was the one who cause the omnibus fire.
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I guess Graydon wasn't too familiar with the Reaper's curse. Either that, or he didn't believe it was real. So now, to reiterate, we're told several times that anyone prosecuted by Van Zieks is doomed, but only one of the defendants Ryu's had so far has died a tragic death and it wasn't even because of the Reaper's curse. It was because someone else sought revenge, so even if Van Zieks hadn't been the prosecutor, McGilded still would've died. Graydon then goes on to talk about what happened in the pawnbrokery and how he shot Windibank without even thinking about it. Van Zieks has something to say about this.
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“A man who used his wealth and influence to distort the facts and escape justice for the crime of murder. What tragic irony... For what you have done... is exactly the same. You've become the very monster you saw, and despised so deeply, in McGilded.”
I feel like this is even more elaborate setup to the fact that Van Zieks's brother, a wealthy and influential man, was actually a mass murderer. For bonus points: 'someone realized the wealthy man was a murderer, knew he wouldn't be confronted with his crimes and therefore took matters into his own hands with vigilante justice'. Does that sound familiar too? Gosh, I love foreshadowing. The judge tells Gregson he'll have to face charges as well, with Van Zieks chiming in that even if it was in the line of duty, Gregson's crime is a serious and inexcusable one. With that, the attention is turned to the defense. The judge says that the morse code thing was an unexpected revelation (and this is said in a complimenting sort of way), with Van Zieks unable to stay silent on this:
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“In fact, I think we should applaud my learned friend's courage here today. I propose a toast. To demanding that government secrets be disseminated before the entire courtroom!”
Hee hee... Well, Gregson did warn him beforehand that he'd be making an enemy of the British government if he played those music discs. Ryu becomes very flustered and apologizes, but the telegraph juror interjects here to say that the dots and dashes weren't really morse code. Rather, it was just gibberish to her. So despite Iris looking thoughtful, it seems we didn't spill any beans after all and the matter is dropped. We move on to our verdict, a unanimous not-guilty for Gina Lestrade. Hurray!
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Now there's a very clumsy scene transition of Ryu and Van Zieks standing in the abandoned courtroom, facing one another. I suppose Van Zieks made some sort of gesture for Ryu to hang back so they could speak in private? It's odd for them to still be standing behind their respective benches, though. Since court's dismissed, it'd be easy for them to just walk up to one another instead of shouting across an empty room. It may be symbolism that there's still a gaping void between the two of them; the Professor incident. Or maybe I'm giving the game too much credit there and they just couldn't be bothered to animate new backgrounds for this single scene. So here we have a very important conversation. I'll type it out:
“I must say you've surprised me, my Far Eastern friend. Despite being a Nipponese, you saw through the pretence to the malice that festered within that Englishman. And at the same time, you saw through the grime to the surprising heart of your English client. You have a curious talent for judging character, especially considering our very different cultures.”
So here we have a telltale problem with racial prejudice. Van Zieks assumed that because Ryu has a different background, especially culturally, he wouldn't be able to understand or relate to English citizens. We've seen this sentiment before in case 1-4, where Van Zieks is shocked that Ryu would understand the mind of an English policeman. Ryu says that he doesn't think there's anything curious about it at all, because whether people are from Britain or from Japan, they're all human beings. They're not so different on the inside. Ryu is effectively saying that Van Zieks needs to stop categorizing people based on their nationality because that doesn't work. Human beings are human beings; some of them are good and some of them are bad. Van Zieks doesn't directly reply to this, instead confirming what we already suspected.
“You know, I took this case for one very simple reason. To lock swords with you once again here in the courtroom. When I encountered you for the first time two months ago, it reminded me... of toasting friendship and trust with another Nipponese... only to find my trust betrayed. Through you, I hoped to look into the eyes of the man I once knew... and try to understand.”
So remember in the previous essay when I surmised that the torrid look of hatred in Van Zieks's eyes was directed at someone who died ten years ago? Well, it's confirmed here. Van Zieks didn't see a fresh newbie whenever he looked at Ryu; he saw Genshin Asogi. The betrayal which took place ten years ago was never given closure. Sure, Van Zieks managed to send Asogi to the gallows to exact 'justice' and get some form of payback, but he was never given Asogi's motives. He never got to confront this man with the emotional turmoil or the hurt, because he wouldn't have been given the opportunity to do so and even if he'd tried, he wouldn't have gotten satisfactory responses. Asogi was abruptly executed and Van Zieks never learned just what possessed a dear friend to murder his brother. He was left with boiling hatred, grief and a whole lot of questions. So indeed, now he hoped to 'understand' Asogi through Ryu, but that was never an option to begin with. Ryu has no relation to that man, so Van Zieks might as well have tried to grasp that understanding by 'locking swords' with Beppo. It's about the same level of futility. Van Zieks's misguided attacks appear to be born from the assumption that it must've been a cultural thing; that perhaps betrayal is something which comes naturally to people from Japan. It's an incredibly stupid, naive way of thinking, because by simplifying Genshin's motives down to his race and cultural upbringing, it takes away the option that there's a far darker truth to be found. Quite frankly, I think Van Zieks is afraid of that truth, just as he was afraid of confirmation that Gregson's not above dirtying his hands. To affirm that Genshin Asogi's friendship was genuine and he truly was an honorable man would imply that he'd had a reason to take Klint's life. I'm not saying it was a good reason! I'm just saying... a reason. When Ryu asks for more details on what happened back then, Van Zieks won't reply.
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“Coming to be known as the Reaper of the Bailey, and my retirement from service five years ago... It gives me cause to wonder if our meeting has some deeper purpose. So... Farewell, my learned Nipponese fellow. Until we meet again.”
(He crushes another chalice in the process of saying this, because of course.) The deeper purpose alluded to here, along with the earlier line that Ryu may one day learn the answer, can only mean that Van Zieks foresees something of a journey here. A path to walk down together with Ryu in which, eventually, the Professor case will once again surface. Whether that's a good thing or a bad thing for Van Zieks, we don't know. I'm not sure he knows. But he did admit to having been pleasantly surprised by Ryu and he had a civil conversation with him just now, so the sentiment here is that Van Zieks is slowly letting go of some of his earlier grudges. He doesn't outright admit that he was wrong to be a scumbag to Ryu, nor does he apologize, but by admitting he was only attacking Ryu to make sense of something that happened in his past, he's basically admitting to his behavior being irrational. He's softened up a little, and with a second game on the way, it means at the very least the option of further character development is there.
The conversation ends and in the defendant lobby, Gina is reminded she's not in the clear yet. There's the curse, after all. Gina's not afraid, because he say she sees it, “the Reaper is a bit like Him upstairs.” Sort of funny to equate the Reaper to God, but what she's basically talking about is karmic retribution. Rotten coves like McGilded get what's coming to them, but she knows she's a good person deep down and so, she thinks she'll escape the curse just fine. Which doesn't say much about all those other victims who came before McGilded, mind. We can't say for certain they were all rotten too. Well, the second game will tell us whether she escapes with her life or not. And normally I would also take a look at the little 'bit' that characters have in the end credits, but Van Zieks didn't get his own bit for whatever reason. He's only briefly mentioned by Pat and Roly Beate, so that's it when it comes to his character in the first game.
Next up, we're moving on to case three of the second game, taking place six months after The Unspeakable Story!
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mando-abs · 3 years ago
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Fear and Loathing in Bounty Hunting (A Mandalorian Mini-Series) - Chapter 1
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Chapter 2 | General Masterlist | Taglist
Summary: Din has received what could possibly be the biggest reward offer since his run in with his force-wielding son. But how much are you willing to sacrifice your sanity in order to secure the bounty?
Pairing: Din Djarin x fem!Reader (this chapter doesn't particularly have any gender defining moments, but it will in later chapters), established relationship with the buckethead :)
Word Count: 4.5k (yowza)
Rating: Mature (I'm still unsure about the direction of this series, so Mature just to be safe)
Warnings: reader is highkey anxious-coded (so lots of worry and self doubt), mentions of blood, somewhat near-death experience (not reader), very mild cursing. If I'm missing something, let me know.
A/N: Screw it, I'm making it a series. Loosely inspired by @asta-lily 's work Business (seriously, go check it out, very much in love with it). Was feeling anxious a lot lately so, also inspired by that I guess. Sorry it took so long! Time flies when you're trying to do all the fun things before summer break ends. Constructive feedback is much appreciated. Enjoy :)
Out of all of the opportunities the galaxy has provided you, becoming a part of a clan of ruffian space outlaws hopping from planet to planet in a rust bucket has been the greatest gift ever given to you. You wouldn’t trade the precious moments you’ve shared between the two for any shiny valuable throughout the parsecs. But, even the times you hold close to your heart can be surrounded with a few harsh realities, undesirable feelings you wish you could shake off. Fears that always linger in the background of your thoughts. Fear that surface when you least expect it. Sometimes...traveling with a band of outlaws...
is just plain stressful.
“Pyke...Pyke. You mean the crime syndicate Pykes? The ‘I control majority of the raw spice trade across the rims’ Pykes? Those Pykes?” You stare at the hologram the bounty puck had provided from behind the pilot’s chair Din is currently sitting in. You awe at the bug-eyed helmeted creature looking back at you.
“Not as much as they used to,” Din says as he puts his feet on the console of the ship to stretch out more. You go over beside him and hoist yourself on the edge of the console to get a better look at Din. You cross your arms as you continue to listen to him. “Ever since the order of the New Republic started spreading, the syndicate numbers have been dwindling. My guess, someone the family wronged in the past is out for some payback. Just waiting to strike back.”
“Yeah, but who out there is willing to dish out these many credits for a bounty hunter to do a job their men could easily do themselves? If it’s anything like you said, there shouldn’t be much of a fight anymore.”
“Probably just want a clean job. Whoever has this much spending money doesn’t want chatter. Besides, it’s not our place to ask. Helps us sleep at night.”
“And that worked so well for you during your last high profile job,” you playfully snide as you raise your eyebrows at him.
Din rolls his head to one side and you just know his eyes did, too.
You shift a bit on the console as if the potential weight of what you just said has perched on top of your shoulders. “You’re right, too low of a blow there. My bad.” Din shakes his head and gives out a poor attempt of a laugh, more breath than sound. He motions his head for you to come closer to him as he drops his feet back to the floor of the cockpit to make room for your arrival. As you make your way to go sit in his lap, you continue rambling to try and compensate for the comment. “I mean, it’s not like we don’t love Grogu. Willing to do anything for the womp rat. But he’s a handful.” You sling your legs over the side of the seat, and Din situates his arms around you. “A beautiful weird lookin’ handful. A handful that everyone is after! Apparently...All I’m getting at is, please don’t bring back another unknown species baby. I mean it’s not like we couldn’t handle…”
Din forces lowers your head into the crook of his neck. He begins to stroke the top of your head in slow rhythmic waves. “K’uur, mesh’la.” Din hums through his vocoder. You sigh and let yourself drop into him. His calmness and touch is always his speciality in getting you to relax, even if it only works at surface level tensions sometimes.
“I know you have concerns about this job. All of them valid...except the baby ones…” That rouses a snort out of you. A laugh he was after, but you’ll give it to him...for now. “But we take precautions every time. You said it yourself, probably won’t be much of a fight now the Pyke family doesn’t have as much padding to protect themselves.”
You wiggle your head out from the side of his neck, and you stare into Din’s visor. Even without the visual aid to confirm your theory, you take comfort in knowing, feeling that he is looking as tenderly back at you. Din lowers his forehead to yours in the most symbolic way he knows, squandering any doubts of his affection. You two take the moment in silence to reassure yourselves and absorb as much as you can in this time before the inevitable hunt begins.
Din whispers while keeping his forehead to yours, “That and you once called me the best bounty hunter in the outer rim.”
You give a little push on his chin to break away his head from yours. The cocky little bastard. You let out a sigh that eventually turns into a yawn and a stretch as now both ends of you are hanging over the side of the seat.
“Alright Din, where are we heading to this time?”
“The Ring of Kafrene.”
If navigating through the asteroid belt wasn’t a deterrent to scare away the less than serious traders of the galaxy, landing your ship in the midst of dark (seriously, dark, there are no suns to brighten the place) sketchy alleyways filled to the brim with people, stretching as far as the eye can see, would. You and Din were on a special kind of stupid though, greed. With a huge pay day looming over your heads, there wasn’t much that could deter you two away from such a task, even if that did mean you and the kid were leaving the comforts of the Crest to join Din on the mission. “Just so I can keep watch on the two of you,” Din reassures. “Way too busy with traders and smugglers to be left alone.”
As Din gathers his weapons and restocks his bandoleer, you tuck the baby in his sling on the side of your hip, opposite of your more dominant side that harbored your blaster and vibroblade (backups if things were to go south). You and Din toy with ideas on what you would spend on the credits.
“I think we’re past due for a wardrobe change, especially little bug here,” you say as you gently scruff the top of Grogu’s head. The kid, still sleepy from his nap, mumbles as he tries to swat your hand away from his scalp.
“Hmmm, I guess I could use a new rifle.”
You eye his extensive armory filled with shelved weapons. “Oh yeah? And where are you going to fit that around here?” You were genuinely curious, but you couldn’t resist adding a bit of attitude to trifle with the heavily guarded mandalorian.
“Same spot you’re fitting that wardrobe.”
“Ah, fair play...fair play,” you say as you grin at Din’s tongue and cheek remark. You blow a raspberry trying to think of something else. “Uh… OH! We could use a new mattress, better sleeping quarters. You know, maximize the space a bit more.” You glide your hands across the space around you to signal a smoother and larger mattress. You raise your eyebrows in anticipation of his response.
“We’ll see, cyare.”
Oooo, that one was a winner. “You know,” you begin to tease at Din, “we could always save up for a new ship instead. Solve more problems than just sleeping quarters…”
“Don’t push it.”
You chuckle, knowing his attachments to the ship and your long reigning “feud” with him to sell it for a new one. You look down at the kid. “What do you want buddy? A new toy? Maybe some frogs on a stick?” you say as you try to rouse the little guy.
Grogu’s ears perk up at the mention of toys and giggles when you say frogs. That got him awake for sure, but now he’s way too excited for someone who is not getting either right now.
Din looks down at the kid in the satchel as he makes his final few adjustments. He crouches down, removes the metal ball Grogu loves so much from one of his pouches, and hands it to the kid. He speaks in a hushed tone to try to calm the kid’s excitement. “We’ve gotta do this job first, Grogu. Then you get to pick out a new toy. Deal?” The baby nods. “Good.” He gets up from his position next to Grogu only to point and look at you. “You’re putting those frogs on a stick.”
Din opens up the side hatch of the ship. All of your silly banter and warm comforts dissipate in the cold hangar below you. And just like that, Din turns back into his all too familiar serious tactician persona. You understand that his change in demeanor is only for the means of survival and reputation, but you would be lying if you said that it didn’t hurt at least a little that he was forced to hide his beautiful personality underneath...even from you. “Alright, keep close. If we get separated, use your commlink. If that doesn’t work, find your way back to the ship. And importantly, don’t make yourselves a target. Got it?” You nod back in agreement with Din’s instructions. Without another word, the two of you walk down the ramp, close the hatch, and start making way to the market streets.
When you arrive at the main drag, you are instantly overwhelmed by the sheer amount of people and vendors. Everyone either had a place to go or people to greet. Nothing was coherent or orderly. A large group of cloaked men going one way, a couple of twi’leks going another. Some interesting characters just stop in the middle of the walkway, jamming traffic. No one cares. The only concern of these pedestrians is getting from point to point in the path of least resistance, roadblocks or not.
You clutch Grogu a bit closer to your person, him being your biggest (tiniest?) responsibility for this mission. Din grabs your hand with one of his securely behind his back while the other holds firm to the tracking fob. You trail him as he guides you through the crowd.
While his eyes are peeled forward, your eyes wander. You try to make out what you see around you, but it becomes increasingly harder the more you try. Some places were more brightly lit than others, making it harder to decipher the faces and wares of some of the vendors. Every now and then a neon sign nearly blinds you. The impression the bright light leaves on your eyes makes it that much harder to make heads or tails of this place. Your sense of smell bounces from pleasant smelling street food to clouds of what you could only hope is steam. Sound? Forget it. You only manage to pick up the voices of the people you pass, the shouts of the vendors, and the clinks and clanks coming from all around you.
You wonder how Din could possibly be holding up? You assume the restrictions of his senses the helmet provides are a massive help to him, but even this has to be a bit much for him. The best answer you could provide yourself is that he must be reverting to his training that moments like these call for…training that you wish you had yourself when a bystander shoves into the side of you and breaks your chain with Din.
You’re startled, but nevertheless you try to regain your connection with Din. You attempt a step forward only to have your balance thrown off by an opposing force. You look around you to figure out the cause and find the baby reaching out desperately in the other direction. His voice becomes more irritated the more you try to press on. You try to decipher his cries until you fully realize his hands are empty. His ball is gone.
You hoist up his pouch closer to your face so he can hear you better. Worry begins to creep up your face. “Grogu, sweetie, there is no way we’re going to be able to find a small metal ball in this sea of people.” The kid looks behind you annoyed, but he manages to calm himself and close his eyes. “We promised you a better toy soon after this job. Okay? Now, unless you’ve got a great idea I suggest we -”
You're immediately cut off by the sound of metal whooshing past your ear. Soon after you shutter at the sound, you look down at Grogu, who is now fully content with his little ball in his hands. In your bout of confusion, you glance behind you only to find pedestrians staring back at you with a similar perplexed expression.
At your realization of what just happened, you start shuffling forward in the other direction, embarrassed out of your wits. Great, you thought, you tell a kid to figure it out and he uses baby magic on you.
Din’s voice rings through your thoughts, “And importantly, don’t make yourself a target.” You continue pushing up through the throngs of people in hopes that you will blend in with the rest of the crowd. You hold Grogu closer to your chest and keep looking behind you to see if anyone has followed you. After a minute of moving about, to much of your relief, no one had made the effort to trail you. You look down at the kid as you finally catch your breath beside a street light.
“That was a close one.” You point at him and give him a concerned (not quite angry) look, “You warn me next time before you pull off another stunt like that, got it?” The baby offers you his ball as a peace treaty. You sigh in defeat as you take the ball from his tiny hands. “Alright, but I’m putting it in my pocket for now,” you shove the metal ball deep into your back pocket, “to keep it safe until we get back to the ship.”
You look all around to assess where you are and how you’re going to get back to Din. It’s no use. There’s too many people. You lower Grogu back to your hip and step up on the base of the street lamp to get a better view. Din’s shiny beskar helmet is sure to reflect any of these bright neon signs. You scan the tops of every pedestrian’s head for the precious metal. Those efforts come up short also.
You hop back down to the ground as you talk through your next mode of action. Not that you’ve forgotten Din’s instructions, but more as a reassurance that the mission is still intact. “It’s alright! No need to panic. Just have to…reach for my commlink and call him.”
In your brain’s pilot mode, you bring your commlink as close to your lips as possible and speak as clear as you can manage in these crowds. “This is Mudhorn 2 to Mando 1, over.”
You wait a minute, but get no response.
You try again, clear but with slight concern. “This is Mudhorn 2 trying to reach Mando 1, over.”
You wait even longer this time.
Nothing.
You look around yourself, secretly hoping this is another one of Din’s attempts to sneak up behind you and scare you.
It isn’t.
It’s not like him to not answer back when he gave the all clear to use the commlink. Your internal thought processes rattle back and forth as you try your hardest to rationalize your situation.
It’s fine, he probably just can’t hear you. Or he’s being held up. He’s asking around about the bounty and can’t speak. Or someone’s silencing him. Maybe he got into a quarrel before he captured the bounty and the commlink broke, but he’s on his way to you. Or he’s been injured by the bounty and needs my help. It doesn’t matter, he told you to go back to the ship if separated. Din needs my help. No! Yes.
“Dank ferrick!” you growl as you push off the light post and continue heading up the street, opposite the way back to the Crest.
You hold the child close to your body to protect him as you practically shove your way through the crowd of people. You look for any signs of metallic gear and take a closer look into dark alleyways that may tip you off on Din’s whereabouts.
As your search continues to show no promising signs of progress, your breathing becomes increasingly labored. Your face and chest become hotter, and your hands grow cold. You stop when the street turns into an intersection, two market streets converging together and double the amount of people. You twist your body in tight circles, head whipping in all different directions. The bodies of pedestrians keep bumping into you. You clutch the kid tighter to your side unconsciously. Was it for his protection or an attempt to ground you? How did you let yourself get in this situation? Why can’t you just follow orders? Which way do you go? Where’s Din?
A small set of teeth bites your hand and you snap out of your frantic daze. “OW! Hey!” You grab the kid out of his pouch this time and give him a stern look. “What was that for?! If you don’t -,” but your rant is interrupted by Grogu’s loud incoherent babbling. His tiny hand points to the east side of the intersection. You look down the direction he’s pointing at only to look back at him angrily confused. As you stare into Grogu’s eyes, however, you realize that the kid is pleading with you rather than trying to distract you. Your face loosens with sincerity. He’s desperately trying to tell you that he knows where Din is. It’s almost like he’s broadcasting to you what’s on his mind...
You soothe Grogu by running your hand along his head. “Ok, little bug. I believe you. I’ll let you lead the way.” You face the kid to the crowds as you hold him close to your chest. Together, you turn east at the intersection.
The kid has you twisting around all over this Maker-forsaken crater. A lot of weird stares are thrown your way as you take your directions from a child (not to mention a few curses from street vendors as you skirt behind their carts), but the two of you are focused as ever at finding your beloved mandalorian. After what seems like aimlessly wandering for a while, Grogu practically lunges to your left, and you turn down an empty dark alleyway. He begins to babble again, almost screeching this time. “Shhh. Sh, Grogu. It’s alright. We’ll find him. But are you sure -”
As if to answer your question, you hear a collection of grunts, shuffling, and things breaking coming from behind a door. The door abruptly bursts open, and Din is tossed out onto the street next to you. You would be relieved at the sight of him if you weren’t worried for everyone’s safety. “Mando!” You rush to Din’s side and crouch next to him. The door slams shut behind you. You look back at the door to ensure that no one is planning to harm you before you attend Din again. “You okay?”
He grunts. “I told you to go back to the ship.” Well, at least his stubbornness hasn’t taken a blow. You look him over for any signs of injury just in case. He has a hand over his upper left side.
“Well, maybe if you worked on your grip we wouldn’t have this discussion. Here.” You grab hold of his right arm to help him off the ground. Din’s trying to hold back from panting. You put a hand on his shoulder. You can tell he’s hiding something. “Where’s the bounty?”
Din takes a deep breath before responding. “Gone. But I know where he’s going. We need to get out of here if we’re ever seeing those credits.”
You look back from where you came from and then glance down at Grogu, tucked into your other arm. “You wouldn’t happen to know the way back to the ship, kid?” The kid gives you an, “eh?” as he looks at you sideways.
Din sighs. “Put the kid back in his satchel. I know a shortcut.”
As you return Grogu to your side, you keep an eye on Din. He winces as he holds near his ribcage firmer this time. “You sure you’re fine?”
“No, I think my shoulder dislocated. Could you look at it?”
“Of course.” You come up close to Din, put your arm around the back of his neck (just for added flair, it is an empty alleyway afterall), and inspect his shoulder. “Can you try and roll it for me?”
“Yeah, just lemme…” his voice trails off. Din’s arm (that happens to be dislocated?) wraps around you, pulling you tighter to him. Your threads of thought become slightly disrupted at the gesture. A little bit of heat rises to your face. “Mando,” you say hushed despite longing to call him by his real name so close to him, “now’s not the time for experimenting.”
“I know. So hold on.”
Before you even have a chance to process what he’s asking of you, Din presses a button on his comms system to activate his jetpack. You instinctively wrap your other arm around his neck as all three of you lift off of the ground.
“MANDOoOoO!!!!” Your exclamation falters the higher you go. You try to make sure Grogu’s secure but your head is glued to Din’s helmet. The weight on your thigh hasn’t changed, so that’s probably a good sign...Little womp rat’s probably also enjoying every moment of this right now. And so is the cheeky mandalorian underneath that bucket. You don’t have much time (or concern) to berate Din as it doesn’t take very long until you are hovering over the hangar where you started this journey. Air travel is a lot faster than on foot, especially with these crowds.
You land next to the Crest on both feet. The kid giggles wildly at the joyride. You shove yourself off of Din, visibly annoyed by the dangerous stunt. “Whatever happened to not making ourselves a target?”
Din sucks in some air between his teeth after your shove. He presses his comms system for the side platform to release to allow yourselves in. “That was before I got hurt. Besides, bounty’s getting away. Here.” Din reaches in one of his punches and hands you a piece of paper as you both are walking up the ramp. “Punch in these coordinates and get us out of here.”
You set the child gently on the ground once you get inside. Grogu trips up in the bag but scurries to hug Din’s boot as the mandalorian closes the hatch back up. You reach your hand out to him and start towards him, wanting to take care of him first.
Din lazily waves you off. “Go!”
You hesitate for a moment and glance back and forth at your two boys. Grogu keeps trying to climb up the mandalorian’s leg; he too looks at Din with great concern along with worried cooing. Knowing how much the capture of this bounty means to the three of you, you decide to hurry up the ladder and rush into the cockpit. You make haste by igniting the engine and lifting the ship off the ground in order to tend to Din as soon as possible. You speed out of the hanger (a bit sloppier than you’d like to admit, but now’s not the time for perfection) and punch it off this stupid rock… only to be met with smaller (yet still freakishly huge) asteroids. You stomach the panic threatening to spill all over the console as you dodge and skim through the asteroid belt. As the asteroids dink and clip the sides of the Crest continuing to damage the ship, you keep the image of your clan of two waiting for your safe return in the front of your mind to make it through the nightmare.
The very second you're clear, you set the navicomputers to prepare the jump to hyperspace, never wanting to go through another space rock storm ever again. You punch in the coordinates and activate the hyperdrive, thrusting the ship into the calming lightspeed you’ve learned to call home. You slump back into the pilot’s seat and catch your breath, riding out your adrenaline. “Son of a nerfherder,” you say as you take a long inhale and exhale, “I actually did it.” You huff out a surprised scoff at yourself, and thank your lucky star (force?). As you lay there in the chair, your moment of rest is cut short when you happen to glance down at your tunic. Blood stains litter the top side of your torso. Your eyes get wide and the sound of metal hitting the floor of the hull below alerts you.
Din.
You almost trip on the co-pilot’s seat as you race to slide down the cockpit ladder, not even bothering to pass your feet through the rungs. After you land yourself below, you race over to find the mandalorian sprawled out on the hull’s floor and the kid hovering a hand over the dark, wet spot of blood alongside the exposed side of Din’s ribcage.
“Grogu!” You drop next to the two of them scared out of your wits and grab the kid away from Din, “Don’t touch him! He’s hurt!” Panic-stricken, you start peeling the armor off on and around his chest and ripping away at the flight suit to reveal his wound. But at closer inspection of his injury, it’s mostly healed. Well, it still doesn’t look pretty, but it appears that this fresh wound is already beginning to scar over. A wound this small wouldn’t be able to produce this amount of blood. No visible signs of internal bleeding either. “Din? Din, can you hear me?” you say as you check his pulse and watch his breathing. Normal, as far as you're concerned. “Alright, Grogu? I’m going to need you to grab the medkit right over -,” you stop as you whip your head to look at the kid. He’s out cold on the floor on the opposite side of you.
Your hands rush over to the kid, not caring to wipe some of Din’s injury from your hands out of shock. You grow intensely worried as your boy was perfectly fine just seconds before. “Grogu?!” He looks to be sound asleep, but you know that can’t be since his prior nap before all of this chaos started. There’s no way.
You become overwhelmed as you stare back and forth between your only two companions. You begin to spiral downwards as you contemplate what to tend to first: the bizarrely healing wound of the injured mandalorian or the mystery illness of the otherwise healthy baby.
The helplessness seeps into your eyes as you desperately search for a solution in the deafening silence of your home.
A/N: Ooooo...dun dun dun. Don't worry! It'll all work out in the end. I promise. Thanks for sticking around though. That was cool of you. Hopefully stick around for Chapter 2??? If you want to be tagged for this mini-series, just leave an ask in my inbox or ask on this post. Either way is fine.
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general-mahamatra · 4 years ago
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This is very specific but do you have any headcanons about double dates between Jeanbilee and Silvercyclops? That or how do you headcanon Charles and Erik’s sexualities? I think of Erik as pan and Charles as gay.
Hehe... Oh I can do this. 
For Charles and Erik’s sexualities, I definitely agree. Charles is gay and Erik is either bi or pan (that one I’m not too solid on).
With the double date, catch me putting this in a modern setting. It’s under the line since there’s a lot
Individuals
Scott
Scott was definitely against the idea of a double date
Why? Because it’s kind of awkward to go out on a double date where the other couple... one of them is your ex
Yeah he’s still good friends with Jean! He’s just not sure how to handle going out to an event with her in a sort of romantic setting. Especially because there’s that slight problem that you KNOW he’s kinda anxious. Like what if people who knew him when he was dating Jean finds him all close and romantic with Peter?
Of course that’s not gonna happen. Man’s just anxious
But Peter managed to convince him and assure him that it would be alright
“It’s just a movie, Scotty. No one’s gonna care,” Peter had said. “Literally it’s dark and the seats are set up in pairs, you don’t need to worry.”
Scott protested immediately with, “but what if--”
“I’ll pay for the popcorn and treats. And the drinks. I’ll pay for it all for you.” 
Scott caved pretty quickly
Except he didn’t know that before the movie the group was going out to dinner because for some reason his mind completely omitted that information. By the time they got together, he remembered, but oh man. He was not prepared
Yeah he was dressed up because Peter was really insistent on him wearing something decent, but the fact they were going out to dinner skipped his mind entirely
He was antsy during the dinner at first. Really shifty-eyed and such and was overall just visibly nervous
But he cooled down fast
He had a lot of fun at the dinner, even if he was a bit awkward with Jean at first
But he loosened up. He found himself enjoying the event much more as time went on and he even managed to calm down enough to comfortably interact with Jean just like he used to
It was actually kinda refreshing
He had whole conversations with the ginger. While Jubilee and Peter were going off about their crazy ideas and plans and things that have happened to them over the past weeks, Scott and Jean were just talking about... life. Catching up on what they’ve missed since they split apart and inevitably pulled away from each other (Scott moreso than Jean)
It brought a sense of closure to Scott that he didn’t realize he needed
He found himself warming back up to interacting with Jean and was... happy with it
Peter
Oh Peter was excited for the double date
Ever since Jubilee ran up to him and proposed it to him he was completely on board. Hell, he even helped plan it out with Jean and Jubilee at times
It was actually Jean’s idea for Peter to convince Scott that things would be alright. She knew he was worried about it, even if it was all irrational. She also knew that he was their best bet on helping Scott out and getting him comfortable with the idea
So Peter did just that
He actually did a lot more than just blatantly tell Scott that he was going to pay for everything at the movies
Peter did a lot of minimal prodding. Stuff to get Scott to talk in a way that wasn’t too intrusive or anything (it’s honestly a special ability of Peter’s). It helped him understand what he was gonna have to do to help his boyfriend out
Because Scott had never been on a double date before
And Peter actually found that kinda funny
But when it came to the date itself, he was completely down for it. He wanted to do it since the moment Jubilee told him about it and he decided he was going to put about as much planning effort into it as her. After all, it’s not different from other... events they’ve planned in the past. They have a perfect system
The movie was his idea
He deemed it “necessary after eating at some dumb fancy place. Because who in their right mind is gonna go out to eat and then just head home at like, 7pm?”
(Peter was also the reason they didn’t end up going to a restaurant where you had to dress up SUPER fancy)
(Granted he wasn’t entirely successful. Jean shot him down and made him settle with having to dress up a little. She wasn’t going to drive them all to dinner if it was gonna be some fast food shit)
Honestly, him and Jubilee are on the exact same wavelength for the date
Jean
Jean was definitely the TRUE brains behind the double date
She was the one who mentioned the idea to Jubilee who then took the idea and ran with it, making it a true plan
She did it because, well, she’s always wanted to have a double date. It was only possible now that she was with Jubilee and her other friends were together
Besides, she like anyone else was aware of just how close Jubilee and Peter were. It was honestly a perfect plan
Scratch something off her bucket list while also getting the two away from their peers so everyone could actually catch a break from their high energy
Actual perfection right there
That and she could tell Scott was awkward around her, even if they’ve been broken up for almost an entire year by this point
There were a lot of times Jean tried to reconnect with him and get him to loosen up but nothing really worked until she came up with the double date
It would give her the opportunity to get her friend back while also allowing him to be in a sort of comfortable environment (she’s noticed the way he tends to cling to Peter whenever she comes around. She isn’t sure if she should be hurt by it or not but she knows he doesn’t mean ill will)
She has to admit though, Peter’s idea of a movie after was a great idea. It’s not something she would’ve put forward or even thought about
Then again... she wasn’t expecting the duo to take over the planning and make it a lot more “light” than an actual “true” date
Jean was looking to reserve them stuff out at a true fancy restaurant. Maybe get them to all dress up and put them in a romantic setting but she was quickly put in her place by Jubilee and Peter’s insistence that it’s a double date, they don’t need to be in a super romantic area
And honestly, they had a point
But she refused to let them make the event completely casual. If she was going to be involved in any planning, they were gonna go somewhere where they have to dress up at least a little
She won that argument easily
Jubilee
OH MAN 
Okay yeah Jubilee was definitely the front runner with the planning and setting everything up
Even with the double date originally being Jean’s idea, Jubilee took it upon herself to plan it all out mostly because she wanted to treat her girlfriend
(You act as thought Jubilee doesn’t know her own partner’s bucket list. Jean literally has it written out in a notebook under her pillow, Jubilee has gone through it multiple times)
She wanted it to be perfect
Which is why she went to Peter
Jean was the one who planted the idea of going on the double date with Scott and Peter but let’s be real, Jubilee would’ve chosen the boys anyways. They were the best bet
Either way, she was ecstatic
She literally has so much experience with planning from the pranks and events she’s set up with Peter, she knew exactly what she was doing when she got with him to plan everything out
Jubilee was actually the one who chose where they were going to dinner
It was a nice Hawaiian themed place. A seafood restaurant with a tropical theme and generally considered a 4 or 5 star restaurant. It was a perfect place, especially with its looser “dress code” (it was basically a sort of business casual, for lack of better terms. If she tried to describe it she would just point to Scott wearing a nice button up with no tie and Jean wearing a cute blouse and flowy pants to match)
(The really funny part is her and Jean low-key made it out to Peter like super fancy restaurants require you to wear formal clothes just so he would cave and “go somewhere less strict”)
(He never found out)
But if she was going to be honest, her favorite part of the double date was the movie afterwards
It was the newest Men in Black and she was losing her mind throughout it
Did she tune out the boys while they were nerding out quietly to her right? Yes, yes she did. She was much more focused on the humor and action and experiencing it with her girlfriend
Overall
Not gonna lie, Scott definitely clung to Peter at first
Like that much is obvious, but it really wasn’t that... obvious? It was if you looked closely at how he hovered closer to the older boy or how his head always seemed to be turned slightly towards him during conversations as if looking to him for stuff to say
Peter noticed it for sure, just as Jean did
Both of them let it happen. Because even when Scott loosened up as the night went on, he still wanted to stick close to his comfort and they didn’t want to pull him away from that
Man just doesn’t handle break ups well
Honestly though, the dinner was wonderful for the entire group. There was so much laughter and chatting and catching up, especially since they aren’t consistently hanging out together anymore
Jubilee convinced Scott to try some really spicy squid dish that he couldn’t remember the name of for the life of him and Peter just... kept ordering more chocolate milk
(They quickly learned that he forgot refills aren’t free)
(That didn’t stop him)
Outfits
Scott: Nice blue button up and black slacks. Honestly really basic typical “oh that guy looks cishet” kinda look, especially with the very plain uniform look to him
Peter: Black button up with white specks across it that look like stars and some slacks as well except his belt was a bit more... decorative than Scott’s. (It’s colorful)
Jean: A cute, loose blouse with a nice white and red floral/watercolor sort of pattern that sits nicely on her frame with some flowy pants and flats. Her hair was done into a braid
Jubilee: A nice long sleeve sweater-like yellow top and a short white skirt with a pair of flats as well. She had her hair down and man was it nice and curly
Honestly everyone was dressed so nicely, it was almost a miracle
During the movie, the couples sat together. That’s a given. But the way they interacted was definitely different from each other
Jean and Jubilee were vibing in their seats. They had chocolate and slushies and popcorn and were overall having a great time just enjoying the movie. There wasn’t too much commentary other than them laughing together or making fun of something they saw on screen
(Jean one time did yell at someone for having their phone on in the movie...she’s that person)
Jubilee was constantly touchy with Jean whenever something crazy happened or there was something intense. Hell, she ended up wrapping around Jean and crying when her favorite character died
Jean took it and honestly... it made her soft
She didn’t know it was possible to fall even further in love
Peter and Scott, though, were different. They too had all the treats and candy and such like the other couple but they were much closer than the girls. They were BASICALLY cuddling (Scott will never admit it). Like come on, you know it’s true
Scott was curled up against his boyfriend. Like head resting against Peter as the older had his arm around him. You know the drill
Again, Scott will never admit to it
But the entire time they were geeking out. Both of them grew up with sci-fi, especially MiB. And BOTH were excited for the newest movie and were having a great time pointing out the aliens and all that stuff and just overall having fun
After the date, the drive was both full of energy and calm. It was 10 by the time they were leaving the theatre and honestly... it’s an experience none of them would give up for the world
...they planned another one for the future
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nishaapologist · 4 years ago
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do you have any fo4 mod recommendations? i re-downloaded recently but i dont know where to start
/sliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiides in boy, DO I,
okay so i legit run my game with 87+ mods because as far as im concerned if its not crashing u can still shove a few more in there:
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BUT i have a more Core Group that i think are needed as the Bare Basics of playing? so i guess i’ll list them off!
now i will add very quickly: i mod for immersion, usually? immersion and building at my two big ones tbh. i basically try to make my game more open to interpretation so i can Fuck Off and Do Whatever and still have my game be able to facilitate that, whereas other people mod cool stuff in because Cool Stuff Is Cool To Have, regardless of whether or not it fits the “lore” or style of fallout as a whole. so even though i have a lot of mods, most of these boil down to tweaks and small additions to make my life smoother as a whole.
slamming this under a cut because this list goes on for a Bit:
so let’s talk about broader dependencies first! a lot of Big Mods require other tools to run, so obviously we’re starting with:
F4SE (Fallout Script Extender. you can’t do SHIT without this)
Armor and Weapons Keywords Community Resource (aka AWKCR. used for a LOT of armor mods and stuff)
Mod Configuration Menu (this doesn’t have any dependencies itself per se, but a lot of mods play with it and make it easier for you to adjust mods from the menu as opposed to yr pip-boy or, god forbid, the .ini files)
Unofficial Fallout 4 Patch (i mean. why wouldn’t you)
Workshop Framework (for workshop modding and settlement stuff)
there’s technically more i use for Other Mods, but they probably won’t come up here so i’m just gonna sliiiiiiiide on past. i’m also NOT gonna talk abt ENBs cause that’s a whole other can of worms. anyway. moving briskly on to the main course.
MODS MURPHY CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT
Armorsmith Extended: adds a BUNCH of modifications to armour, including layering armour, adding more adjustments and modifications like ballistic weave, and being able to adjust like, everything in the game. it also does an overall streamlining of armour slots to make stuff take up Less Space on yr body. neato.
Darker Nights: ever thought to yourself that the moon in fallout must be powered by a nuclear reactor to be so friggin’ bright all the time? this fixes that. makes it dark as shit at night, to a level you prefer! mine’s, like, super dark. enough that without a flashlight i’m staring at a black screen lmaoooo WHICH BRINGS US TO
Pip-Boy Flashlight: i owe this mod my next seven dogs. HOLY SHIT. this pairs up with Darker Nights like a match made in heaven. fully customisable lights on yr pip-boy AND power armour, with a HUUUUGE menu of options. you WILL wonder how on earth you ever put up with the vague green glow of yr pip-boy ever again.
Dogmeat’s Backpack: i love travelling with dogmeat, but he does double as a pack brahmin for me. this adds backpacks to increase his inventory, as well as adds some collars with fun effects to help you in and out of combat! good doggy :)
Durable Vertibirds: vertibirds come and go but they really shouldn’t. this makes vertibirds hard as nails to kill. stops supermutants being able to shoot em outta the sky via wet fart.
Full Dialogue Interface (other dialogue mods are available): lists all dialogue out in full in yr options, so u know what yr gonna say before you even say it! there’s a bunch of mods in this genre, i just picked the one i have for now.
Homemaker: i love building. Homemaker adds a ton (and i mean a TON) of building objects and items that lets you do anything from decorating more thoroughly to building concord, two! it’s a great mod if you, like me, love spending 12 hours placing items. which brings us to:
Creative Clutter: does what it says on the tin. adds HUNDREDS of new items that let you put down clutter to make stuff feel more lived in. luv that for me. but THAT brings us TO:
Place Everywhere: do you wish the game didn’t highlight shit in red when you jostle a bed 2mm to one side? this mod stops that! and also adds an entire overhaul to the way building works, with a learning curve like a brick wall to the face and granular movement adjustments to the pixel. i cannot do ANYTHING without this mod. i functionally cannot PLAY this game without this mod. it’s VERY good, and ties nicely into:
Scrap Everything: ever looked at the trash on the ground and wished you could poof it out of existence? now you can! it even gives you resources for the effort. vines, trash, walls, pavement, grass, rubble, debris, you name it, you can scrap it! it’s a VERY powerful mod though so be careful what you scrap, because i have actually deleted the entire Castle before. whoops.
Start Me Up: a PREMIER mod. this is like. yeah no. i wont even run my game if this isnt installed. Start Me Up doesn’t just let you have a custom alt-start, but changes all the dialogue in the game to scrub any mention of being Shaun’s parent, so you can play that raider you’ve always dreamed of without ANY concerns of someone asking you if you have a kid. a dream come true :)
Sarcastic Sneaking: changes all sneaking dialogue from HIDDEN, DETECTED, CAUTION and DANGER to SAFE FOR NOW, THEY CAN SEE YOU, THEY’RE GONNA FIND YOU, and YOU’RE FUCKED. this mod doesn’t do anything else. yet it’s one of my favourites of all time. a must-have for a murpy playthru.
Wearable Backpacks and Pouches: i like picking up junk, but my frail back keeps breaking under the weight :( this mod adds customisable backpacks and pouches to increase yr carry limit! amazing.
Survival Options: if yr not playing Survival you don’t need this, BUT if you ARE i cannot recc this mod enough. it lets you adjust yr survival experience to perfection, including adding save options like ‘save on cell change’ or ‘save on level up’, as well as tweaking beds and the like. it pairs nicely with:
Unlimited Survival Mode: allows you to further tweak your game by unlocking hard-coded barriers, such as allowing you the vanilla compass, opening up the console, or allowing you to quick save, auto save, manual save, and much, much more. i use this so i can use god mode whilst building in my sarah run, haha.
OTHER MODS MURPHY COULD MAYBE LIVE WITHOUT, BUT WHY WOULD YOU?
No More Creation Club News: SHUT UP I DON’T CARE ABOUT THE CREATION CLUB!!! TODD!!! gets rid of that bloody... newsreel when u open the game. thats it. im at peace.
Multiple Followers Overhaul: lets me have dogmeat, AND another friend :) can be used to have as many as, like, 50 followers or something crazy? i just use it to always have dogmeat + someone else, lmao.
Lots More Female Hairstyle/Male Hairstyles/Facial Hair: this blends together all of the vanilla hairstyles into more interesting combos numbering the, like, hundreds. can’t recc it enough.
Improved Map With Visible Roads: for when i can’t find goodneighbor :( but actually, this makes the map significantly clearer and easier to use to navigate roads, and is just a quality of life tweak that i rly, rly need in survival, lmao
LooksMenu: does a bunch of stuff in character creation that plays nice with other character creation mods, but primarily allows you to modify the face from a menu rather than contextual hover, and lets you save presets to a menu, so once you’ve made a face you can save it for another character/run later!
APC Transport: i JUST added this one but... lets you travel in survival via a personal APC! comes with storage, artillery, and the ability to travel to any major city and found settlement. it’ll break down every now and again and also consumes fuel, so it’s more immersive than plain ol’ fast travel. i’m REALLY enjoying it!
TBH this isn’t even, like, the end of this list... there’s other mods i, personally, like too much to not have, but this is probably the Lite Version(tm) that also has frameworks for other mods like Sim Settlements and what have you.
again u can see its mostly for building and immersion (and i have even more immersion mods than just this, trust me) but i think it’s a pretty good groundwork for any fallout run. have fun!
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purplesurveys · 4 years ago
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1010
survey from diggitydoo
Have you ever felt a baby kick? Yes, when my mom was pregnant with my brother. What color pants/shorts are you wearing? I’m only wearing a duster gown; no shorts underneath. I just got it last night, actually - my mom wanted to donate clothes to victims of a recent fire incident in Manila and so she asked my sister and I to sort through our closets for clothes we were willing to give away. My sister ended up giving away a comfy-looking duster gown that she never even wore and even smelled brand new to boot. It ended up in my hands, ha. But apart from that we gave away a lot of stuff that aren’t old uniforms or costumes (which is what most people tend to ‘donate’, ugh), so we just hope they end up with people who really need them. When is the last time you did something truly fun, and what was it? Last night I went on our org’s Discord server and we played Jackbox games for around an hour or so. It was my first time to socialize again after around two months and I really, really needed that moment. I even met the org’s newest roster of applicants for this semester, which was neat. :) What was the scariest moment of your life? Men terrorizing me or near-car crashes I’ve had.
Have you ever heard of Leonard Cohen? The name is familiar, but that’s the most I know.
Pancakes or flapjacks? I guess pancakes, since I don’t even know what flapjacks are. What kind of computer are you on? It’s a laptop. Do you eat Chinese food? If so, what's your favorite dish? For sure. Pork buns or minced pork with eggplant. With century egg on the side, yum. What are you usually doing at midnight? Either passed out or desperately trying to sleep because I don’t want to lose any more hours of sleep and risk being cranky for the whole of the next day. Have you ever developed feelings for a friend, but you were already with someone? No. The worst thing that’s happened was being someone’s ball date (and unbeknownst to me, they apparently had feelings for me at the time) while I was already with someone. If so, how did it turn out? He figured it out by himself, which I still feel bad about. But the timing was super off and I just couldn’t find a moment to sit him down and set the record straight...ah well. It was just super complicated at the time. Give me your brief definition of love. My favorite love-related quote is “Love never says ‘I have done enough’” and for the longest time, that has been my guiding principle when it comes to it. Definitely a tad bit cheesy, but telling myself that over and over makes it easier to continue loving the people I care for and be patient with them when they’re being asses. Gab included, then and now. What is the most beautiful part of the human body, male or female? It differs for everyone but I’m a thigh girl through and through. What kind of shoes do you wear? Uh...various ones? I have sneakers, flats, heels, flip-flops, probably a couple more kinds that I can’t place at the moment. What is the worst thing you've ever done when you were really angry? Resorting to physical violence. I was a kid constantly exposed to violence in my old home, and at the time I genuinely thought that’s how most things were settled or pacified. I still feel like shit about it to this day, and my backstory isn’t an excuse at all; but the past is the past and I’ve been trying to make up for it by being a much more gentle angry person in the last few years. Are there any pills you take on a daily basis? If so, what? Nope. Do you like the smell of coconuts? For some reason I can’t stand anything coconut (which is a damn shame considering I’m Filipino) but I love dishes with heaps of coconut milk in them, like curry. That’s the one coconut-related thing I enjoy, but otherwise I’ve never learned to appreciate the taste and smell of buko juice, coconut shavings, coconut pies, and everything else coconut. What is the heaviest you think you can lift? From what my old PE class showed me, around 70 to 80 lbs. Do you take Tums? Idk what that is so I guess I don’t. Have you ever walked on a pier at the beach? I’m not sure if I’ve been to a pier before. I bet it feels wonderful and freeing and I’d love to visit one; but I also can’t keep myself from associating piers with the recurring image of Jennifer Connelly’s character standing on one from Requiem for a Dream. How about under one? No. At what age do you first remember feeling butterflies in your stomach around someone? Not sure if it was 11 or 12, but it was definitely one of those years. Do you feel that way around anyone now? Yeah, if they allowed me to see them. But I’m shut out now so I haven’t had that sensation in a while.
Do you ever talk to yourself or think deep thoughts while on the toilet? No. Do you ever sing to yourself? Sure. I’m sure most people do every once in a while. What is a sound that relaxes you? Ocean waves have never failed. How hard has it been to reach your main goal in life? ‘Main goal’ sounds so overwhelming; I make it a point to avoid one overarching goal and instead make little goals and plans here and there depending on where I am in life. Do you remember the song about hoes in different area codes? Never heard of it. What is your main heritage? Filipino. What kind of pickles do you prefer, if you like pickles? I hate pickles. What kind of cheese do you prefer, if you like cheese? Mozzarella and feta are my faves, but I love cheese and am willing to be adventurous when it comes to it. If you could have a sea creature as a pet, what would you want? Eh, they can stay in the sea where they can actually survive. I don’t exactly have the best track record when it comes to keeping fish as pets. How about a farm animal? Probably pig. So, do you have hoes in different area codes? No, and ew. What is the most annoying song you can think of that came out recently? Haven’t been exposed to a lot of new music lately and the songs I do get to hear on the radio whenever I drive are actually pretty good. This totally doesn’t answer your question but my favorites so far have been Birthday by Disclosure, Kehlani, and Syd; and Plain by Benee, Lily Allen, and Flo Milli. What is a song that you hate to admit you like? Any Kanye song I like. What inspires you to get off your bum and do something productive? Not wanting to go into another downward spiral. Do you ever use Urban Dictionary? Extremely rarely. I only do when there’s a new slang I’m completely unfamiliar with. Do you find the definitions on there to be generally funny or stupid? Stupid for the most part. I find them too immature or vulgar, but that’s one of the points of the website so I guess I’m just not in their target audience lol. What comes to your mind when you hear the word 'transformation'? Uh, the Transformer robots.
What was something you regularly played with as a child? My cousins’ toy soldiers.
Have you ever given in to peer pressure? Eh, a few times. If so, what did you do? I’ve been pulled to drinking sessions here and there when I really shouldn’t be drinking because I had an important test tomorrow or something else was happening the next day that was just as significant. What part of your body have you had the most problems with in your life? Teeth, I’m pretty sure. I’ve had braces, needed a tooth extracted, gotten a cavity, and gone through a severe toothache.
Do a lot of people check you out when you're in public? Idk I never look around because being aware of it would just freak me out and make me feel like I’m naked. What is a good name for a turtle? Would depend on their personality. And this applies to all kinds of pets, at least for me. I don’t decide on their names until I have a good grasp of their attitude. Can you imitate any accents well? If so, which one(s)? Stereotypical Filipino mom and valley girl. Do you like having your ear nibbled on? Sure. What makes a good kisser a good kisser? I’ve only kissed one person so I’m not the best judge for this; but I always like it when my lower lip is tugged or grazed on. How many times a year do you have a family thing? This is a little vague for me. Do you mean get-togethers? Giant-ass reunions? Movie nights? Game nights?  What are the best things to put in a smoothie? I only like one kind of smoothie and it’s sold by a local joint – and I think I’ve already shared this before but that smoothie of theirs that I like has “apple, banana, cinnamon, oats, coco sugar, chia seeds, greens, and soy milk,” according to their menu. So I guess those are the best ingredients for me, ha. Do you ever eat with your eyes closed and just focus on the taste? When I find something extremely delicious, yeah. What do you dislike most about where you live right now? For the most part I can’t wait to get out of suburban residential villages. I’d love to finally experience living in a condo in a super busy and active city. Has anyone ever given you a rose/roses? Yes.
Are you watching your weight? Not really. I’m trying to gain pounds though, if anything. I haven’t eaten much in the last two months. Have you ever become really good friends with someone you found online? I trust y’all with my life, so that’s one. Apart from Tumblr, the best friends I made were probably the people in the AJ/Punk fandom, back when I had a stan account on Twitter. I don’t remember most of their names now and we fizzled out pretty quickly when both parts of the ship left WWE, but I look back on that period with fondness. Those people made high school a lot easier for me. What makes your best friend your best friend? She doesn’t care whether I’m on top of the world with happiness or completely self-destructive and crying my eyes out; she has always been present. Do you have a drunk uncle? *rolls eyes* We don’t wanna open up that can of worms... Do you hear weird noises in your house at night? Nope. What is something you do that is generally more like something the opposite sex does? Based on personal experience and not to come off as sexist, but it’s liking wrestling. I have never met a girl in real life who has even the most remote interest in pro wrestling or can tell me who Hulk Hogan is. And the ones I’ve had discussions with - from shallow/casual to in-depth - have all been guys. Seeing girls who are into wrestling is like finding a rare Pokemon, at least in real life. What is the girliest thing you do, if you're a girl? Idk. What is the coolest tattoo you've ever seen? Probably the spork tattoo of Josh, a crew member from Good Mythical Morning. It’s just a line tattoo. Of a spork. On his arm. But he managed to make it so goddamn fascinating lmao; and apparently, as I learned just now, it has a pretty touching backstory to it too, which makes it a million times cooler. Have you ever created anything artistic that you're proud of? If so, what? I’ve never finished any of the crafts I bought. Never finished a coloring book page much less an entire coloring book, a painting, a gem painting...it’s something I’ll have to bring my butt to do one of these days. I can’t imagine how fulfilling it would feel. Do you only eat the middle of the oreo, if you eat oreos? I eat the whole thing but I honestly find Oreos too sweet and I’ve always much rather preferred Oreo-flavored stuff instead of the actual cookies.
Do you know anyone with a huge ego? My mom. If so, is there anything else about them you actually like? She’s fed me for 22 years and gave me an education, I guess. Though it’s something I appreciate more so than like. Have you ever used a racial slur, even jokingly? Probably as a dumb kid, when historical context wasn’t a thing to me yet. I still wince thinking about it, but I suppose what matters is being better and more responsible moving forward. Do you have any friends who are more like siblings to you? Angela and to some extent Andi. 
If so, what about them do you like most? They are both understanding when it comes to me - almost to a fault. What do you like on your hotdogs, if you eat hotdogs? When you say ‘hotdogs’ here, it refers to the sausages itself. The sandwich kind of hotdog isn’t super popular here. What is everyone else in your house doing right now? My siblings are still resting in their rooms; my dad is preparing for work, I think. What is the most money you've ever had at one time? Something like P10,000 or P15,000 when my mom needed me to pay for something in cash. How long do you think it would take you to run a mile? Idk, maybe 10 minutes. I won’t be fast, that’s for sure. Look down. What do you see? My legs and the pillow I’m sitting on. What is a subject that makes you uncomfortable? Right now, probably my failed relationship. I haven’t gotten to the sharing stage yet and remotely thinking about it gets my voice all shaky. What is a subject you can talk on and on about and not get sick of it? Paramore. What kind of mood were you in most of today? It’s only 7:52 AM. My only mood so far is just woke up. Has anyone ever walked in on you naked? Yeah. Because people in this damn house never knock. Tell me an inside joke you have with someone. The word ‘ariba.’ What is the worst thing someone could do to you emotionally? Break my trust. So simple but it packs a punch. What is the worst thing you've ever done to someone emotionally? Idk if I’ve ever been that aggressive. When I want to do something destructive towards someone I always end up asking what it would feel like if the action was done to me, and it’s always been enough to sway me away from doing the thing. How do you feel now about the first person you ever dated? Sad. How about the last person (your last ex)? Same person. What is the best invention ever invented? Air conditioners.
What is something that needs to be invented? Portable air conditioners. What always makes you burp? My burps come randomly. What are you doing tomorrow? It’s my last weekend before my new job, soooooooo...I’ll be bumming around for my last two days of freedom.
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homespork-review · 4 years ago
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HOMESPORK ACT 5 ACT 1: Mobius Double Plusungood, Part 2
BRIGHT: Nepeta wants to know what’s going on. Aradia finally stops dodging the question and tells Nepeta she’s dead, but doesn’t elaborate on how it happened. She asks Nepeta to keep it a secret, which Nepeta agrees to. Aradia’s also picked up some froglike traits from being merged with the sprite -- namely a tendency to ribbit.
In retrospect, it’s kind of funny that an active player can merge with a sprite. The role of a sprite seems to involve having detailed knowledge of how the Game works and what the player should do next, but only dispensing vague advice to the player. Prototyping a player would give them full access to that knowledge with no sprite vagueness to get in the way. The Game doesn’t seem too concerned about that, though.
CHEL: Now it’s time to get to know AG better. A doodle of her declaring her to be a HUGE BITCH fades into her standing in her room. Rather gothic, and also filthy-looking; it’s dark, with a red sky outside, and cobwebs and broken Magic 8 Balls lie around everywhere. There’s a FLARP poster and numerous pages of notes on the wall.
Your name is VRISKA SERKET.
You are a master of EXTREME ROLE PLAYING. You can't get enough of it, or really any game of high stakes and chance. You have persisted with the habit even in spite of your ACCIDENT. But then again, you don't have much choice.
Your lusus is VERY HUNGRY, ALL THE TIME. She can only be appeased by the FLESH OF YOUNG TROLLS. You cloud campaigns for teams of Flarpers, utilizing your abilities for ORCHESTRATING THE DEMISE OF THE IMPRESSSSSSSSIONA8LE. Your victories supply you with treasure, experience points, and SPIDER FOOD.
You are something of an APOCALYPSE BUFF, which is something you can be on Alternia. You are fascinated by end of the world scenarios, and enjoy constructing DOOMSDAY DEVICES for the hell of it. You are drawn to means of DARK PROGNOSTICATION and the advantages they offer, particularly in gaming scenarios. Your abilities in this department were hobbled with the loss of your VISION EIGHTFOLD, and you have since sought alternatives through various BLACK ORACLES. You consult with these ominous globes, but routinely destroy them in frustration over the PUZZLING GUARANTEED INACCURACY of their predictions. Breaking them has developed into a habit BORDERING ON FETISHISTIC, and with each you destroy, you add to an insurmountable stockpile of TERRIBLE LUCK. You have to stop. But addiction is a powerful thing.
FAILURE ARTIST: FINALLY we get a name for her and we don’t have to keep saying AG. I imagine the non-Homestucks are feeling like I did when I played Danganronpa 2 finally and saw the “fingers-in-his-ass” guy.
CHEL: She examines a drawing on the wall, of her FLARP character MARQUISE SPINNERET MINDFANG, who is just Vriska in a different coat and seaboots, with a hook instead of her robot hand. She is the scourge of land dwellers and sea dwellers alike, and worst nightmare to silly BOY-SKYLARKS everywhere. She has accumulated more treasure and gained more levels than any member of the PETTICOAT SEAGRIFT class ever. She gained all the levels. All of them.
En route to her computer, Vriska steps on a D4, and complains about how she’s had terrible luck since her mysterious accident. I’d just like it noted that this is a small but noticeable occurrence of Vriska’s tendency to blame others for her problems; if she cleaned her room some time, that wouldn’t happen. Still, she doesn’t worry about it too long, as she’s busy.
So many irons in the fire. Such a tangled web. It is a web full of flaming irons and mixed metaphors.
BRIGHT: Vriska equips her weapon of choice, a set of enchanted D8 dice called the FLUORITE OCTET.
...okay, I’m getting used to characters having semi-absurd weapons, but seriously, what? Let’s review everyone else’s chosen weapons: Hammer, knitting needles, sword, gun, sickles, lance, clawed gloves, walking cane. Sollux had some throwing stars but didn’t assign them to his specibus owing to his telekinesis being enough; we haven’t seen Aradia’s strifekind yet, but she also has telekinetic abilities, and hers are apparently enhanced by her being dead. So that’s a lot of genuine weapons, and some things which aren’t weapons but can readily be used that way in a pinch...and then Vriska has a set of enchanted dice.
It’s a good fit both for Homestuck’s absurdity and for Vriska’s obsession with luck. But it does stand out rather.
Anyway, rolling the dice will execute a wide range of highly unpredictable attacks. Very high rolls can be devastating to even the most powerful opponents. Apparently these work everywhere, not just in FLARP games. Also, while we see ghosts, psychic powers, and superpowered coding, I think this is the only reference to plain magic we have on Alternia.
Vriska steps away from the computer to avoid talking to GA, who she refers to as an unwelcome solicitor, but returns to it when someone else starts messaging her. Vriska calls him this guy; he has no icon -- and, oddly, no username -- and types in white, which means the reader (and Vriska) ends up highlighting the conversation a lot. 
Hello.
AG: Oh my god, why are you talking to me????????
This is the last time we'll ever talk.
AG: Still sticking with the white text I see. So smooth and stylish!
AG: I forgot how much I loved highlighting it to read all the 8oring things you have to say.
AG: It's like a fun game for super extra handicapped retarded people. Like opening a present! Find out what o8noxious thing the mystery tool typed.
AG: What is it!
A parting courtesy, I suppose.
All the ways I've exploited you were meant to bring about the events that will take place this evening.
Knowing this will provide context for the events in your near future, and will affect how you behave in response.
These events will be just as important as those preceding it.
I've gone to great lengths, you see. 
Well, this guy sounds ominous.
Also, using ‘handicapped’ and ‘retarded’ as insults is entirely in character for Vriska, who has no time for people who can’t operate on her level. Currently Vriska’s also being shown as an unlikeable character. We’ll see how that develops.
CHEL: Still, a lot of people really don’t like those words being used casually, and the fact that we need to show you how things develop should imply that they won’t develop in a way you’ll like. So…
CLOCKWORK PROBLEMATYKKS: 39
White Text Guy, as the characters refer to him for a while to come yet, continues gloating about how successfully he’s exploited Vriska, who tells him she’ll log off and orders him not to use that nasty trick where you log me 8ack on out of petty douchey spite! WTG says he’ll be brief, though he’s not particularly brief in fact, tells her he no longer hold[s] her accountable for any wrongdoing, and says that if she accepts this, she may get her luck back. Vriska doesn’t believe him and continues to rant, and he points out that her unpleasant, simplistic temperament is what made her so easy to mess with.
If you turn a swarm of wasps on a crowd, the outcome is certain.
He leaves with these even more ominous words:
Though the magnitude of the ensuing destruction resulting directly from your actions will be neither possible or necessary for you to fathom, there nevertheless ought to be a silver lining.
The only question is whether you will live long enough to see it.
Vriska, enraged, lifts a Magic 8 Ball with the intention to smash it, but decides she can’t be bothered, and answers GA, hoping some camaraderie will cheer her up, even if it’s from a meddler. However, GA’s first question is “Is Your Lusus Dead Yet”. Not particularly cheering, is it?
Vriska, for the first time, expresses concern and sympathy for another person when GA says her own lusus is dead, though it may be undermined slightly by her own personal disappointment in never having got to meet said lusus. GA doesn’t seem very concerned, and says “Maybe You Still Can”. According to her, though, all their lusii are dying, as a “Preemptive Consequence” (if that’s a meaningful concept) of the upcoming Game. Karkat blames himself for activating the cursed code, but GA thinks it was inevitable. However, Karkat’s idea of a curse Is Inseparable From His Perception Of Events As Intrinsically Negative And As Tailored To His Personal Dissatisfaction, and so is Vriska’s poor luck. GA points out that if Vriska cleaned her floor she wouldn’t step on so many things. THANK YOU, GA, you made my point for me! Vriska is angry at GA “meddling” so, and demands to know why she does.
GA: Because Youre Dangerous
[...]
GA: Its Ok To Be Dangerous
GA: Lots Of People Are
GA: And Dangerous People Can Be Really Important
GA: Maybe Even The Most Important Sometimes
GA: But It Just Means Theres Got To Be Someone Around To Keep An Eye On Them
As Vriska gets angrier, it’s noted that she puts 8s in her typing in places where they don’t work as Bs or as “eight” sounds, and they become more numerous.
AG: Or you know, if you're so h8gh 8nd might8 an8 th8nk you're so gr8at, m8y88 you c8uld oh I d8n't kn8w........
AG: TRY AND ST8P ME FROM DO8NG B8D THINGS????????
GA: That Wouldnt Work
GA: If I Tried To Stop You You Would Regard Me As An Enemy
GA: Instead Of Merely As A Nuisance
BRIGHT: GA’s strategy appears to be trying to talk Vriska into being a better person, either by persuading her that it’s the right thing to do or by being so annoying that Vriska does the right thing to avoid being meddled with. She’s making an effort, I’ll give her that. And given that she doesn’t live anywhere near Vriska, there isn’t all that much she can do to rein her in.
CHEL: Vriska signs off, ranting about her “Lousy st8pid godd8mn supportive friend!” and heads down the enormous staircase to check on her lusus.
You wonder if any other kid on the planet has such a high maintenance lusus? You DOUBT it.
As a matter of fact, one does and Vriska knows that, but we’ll see them later. Not a continuity error, it’s just Vriska self-pitying.
From a window, we see a doomsday device hanging over a chasm by chains attached to the surrounding cliffs. Vriska built it for an especially powerful and influential member of the nautical aristocracy, with help from an as-yet-unnamed nearby friend. Vriska reaches the bottom of the stairwell, and we meet her lusus, which is…
… a spider about the size of a cathedral. For the sake of our arachnophobic readers, we’ll refrain from posting a picture. Suffice it to say she’s as terrifying as she sounds. Pan out to show the entire valley is filled with cobwebs, and Vriska’s hive is matched by a similar one on the other side of the valley.
Before we move on, I’d just like to chat a little about the astrological symbolisms used here. Vriska’s the Scorpio troll, and it puzzles a lot of people that she’s spider-themed instead of scorpion-themed. Both arachnids, but not the same thing. However, Scorpio does have multiple symbols, depending on the source of the interpretation of the constellation, including the spider and the phoenix. Observe! (I enjoy astrology. Sue me.) Also, a scorpion would be a lot harder to get the story symbolism out of; Vriska is at least attempting to be a master manipulator pulling on strings, i.e. webs. The astrological symbolism and alleged personality traits aren’t used for all of the trolls in general, either. The troll with the sign of Aquarius the Water-Bearer is seadwelling nobility and probably wouldn’t be happy to be represented astrologically by a servant, and Gamzee is basically the opposite of the ambitious and hardworking traits of the allegedly typical Capricorn. Basically the signs are mostly aesthetic and if Huss can work in some connected symbolism that’s a bonus. I don’t consider this a negative thing in particular, though it might annoy some astrology buffs.
Actually, I don’t know how intentional this was, but one fan actually analysed how the social expectations on Alternia are in fact the exact opposite of what would actually suit their astrological sign. It didn’t get finished but there’s some interesting information - read the posts in question here, beware spoilers!
BRIGHT: One amusing consequence of this can be turned into a game: Go to Tumblr, find an astrology post, and see how long it takes to figure out if it’s a Homestuck riff. Some of them even just say ‘Vriska’ for Scorpio.
It’s probably just because I mostly follow fandom-related blogs, but I’ve yet to see a Tumblr astrology post that wasn’t a more-or-less-subtle Homestuck joke.
CHEL: And the ones which aren’t make for great fanfic prompts!
BRIGHT: Vriska’s lusus is fine, as it happens. Vriska pretends to be happy about this, but she’s rather less convincing than Dave is about his own guardianship issues. 
FAILURE ARTIST: And we turn from Vriska to look in her neighbor and it’s….that creepy guy! Hurray!
Your name is EQUIUS ZAHHAK.
You love being STRONG.
You are so strong, you would surely be the class of the elite legion of RUFFIANNIHILATORS. And while such a calling would be quite honorable, you would prefer to join the ranks of the ARCHERADICATORS, perhaps the most noble echelon the imperial forces have to offer. Unfortunately, you SUCK AT ARCHERY. You have not successfully fired a SINGLE ARROW. Every time you try, you BREAK THE BOW. You are simply too strong. You have broken so many bows, it has developed into a habit BORDERING ON FETISHISTIC. You have to stop. But addiction is a powerful thing.
You have a great appreciation for THE FINE ARTS. You use your aristocratic connections to acquire PRICELESS MASTERPIECES, painted in the oldest and most respected Alternian tradition of NUDE MUSCLEBEAST PORTRAITS. These striking depictions of the EXQUISITE FAUNA native to Alternia remind you of the PUREST PHYSICAL IDEAL that must be sought by anyone who professes a LOVE OF STRENGTH. When those of lesser bloodlines turn up their uncultured noses at such stunning material, it MAKES YOU FURIOUS.
Practically everything MAKES YOU FURIOUS. You have so much rage, it can only be expressed through STAGGERING QUANTITIES OF PHYSICAL VIOLENCE. You build strong and sturdy robots, set them to kill mode, and BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF THEM in caged brawls. Sometimes you LOSE TEETH. But they usually grow back.
FAILURE ARTIST: Equius Zahhak’s first name is obviously a take on the Latin word for horses, but his last name is from a Persian demon who is also known as “he who has 10,000 horses”. 
So yes, that furry porn on his walls is high art to trolls. Though the prequel Hiveswap Friendsim, which has artist characters, doesn’t have MUSCLEBEAST PORTRAITS. Maybe Equius is actually weird.
CHEL: Actually, the Friendsim does have musclebeast art; if you squint at the beginning of Nikhee’s route, you can see depictions of white muscular chests flanking the arena, which don’t look like troll chests. Hiveswap proper is rated PG, so we’ll be spared it there, too.
FAILURE ARTIST: Equius is more even-tempered than his introduction suggests. He’s not completely violence-free (as we will see)  but he’s not in a constant ‘roid-rage. Heck, from what we’ve seen before of him he just gets peeved and snotty. 
Equius calls for his lusus Aurthour, who I guess could be called another self-insert. Aurthour is a centaur-type creature with cow udders and a mustache and looks like something out of Hussie’s early comics. Aurthour carries a glass of lusus milk on a platter, presumably from its own udders. Ummm. 
You cannot hope to beat Aurthour in a butler-off. He is simply the best there is.
Sweet, I guess.
CHEL: I wonder how Aurthour contorts around to reach his udder. Centaurs aren’t really known for flexibility.
FAILURE ARTIST: We find out why Aurthour has a shiner. It’s not because of domestic abuse but because when Equius “gently” pats Aurthour, Aurthour bruises. Yet this creature is the only lusus STRONG enough to raise Equius. 
Equius tries to drink the glass, but it shatters in his hand. Which begs the question of why Aurthour doesn’t use an alternative to glass. Well, I guess Equius going straight to the source would be too disturbing even for Hussie. A bigger problem is how Equius can do the fine detail work of building robots when he can’t hold a glass. 
Equius goes into a rage, which just means he stands around in Hero Mode while the lusus milk quickly evaporates. Wait, quickly evaporates? What is it made of?
CHEL: I assumed the heat of his rage boiled it.
FAILURE ARTIST: Equius tries to equiup equip a bow but fails due to his strength. Like the glass smashing, this is a normal occurrence. You’d think he’d give up but apparently breaking bows is like popping bubble wrap to him. Expensive bubble wrap. So he has the useless 1/2bowkind, a bowkind for when he’s ever that lucky, and the fistkind which he actually utilizes. Yes, in Homestuck, you can register your fists as lethal weapons. 
Equius talks with Nepeta and the narration summarizes like thus:
CT: D --> Yes AC: :33 < no CT: D --> Yes AC: :33 < no CT: D --> Yes AC: :33 < no CT: D --> Yes AC: :33 < no CT: D --> Yes AC: :33 < no CT: D --> Yes AC: :33 < no CT: D --> Yes AC: :33 < no
Equius is still worried about his good friend Nepeta, so he decides to relieve his stress by talking with another friend. And here comes a line fans take as meaning trolls don’t have friendship. 
It should be noted that in troll language, the word for friend is exactly the same as the word for enemy.
Though that line contradicts Equius considering Nepeta his friend only a few lines back. This worldbuilding sucks. 
CHEL: Well, he doesn’t treat her the way a human should treat a friend at this point.
FAILURE ARTIST: So Equius trolls this frienemy who turns out to be Gamzee.
centaursTesticle [CT] began trolling terminallyCapricious [TC]
CT: D --> Have I ever told you what a reprehensible disgrace you are
TC: hAhA, fUcK yEaH, oNlY eVeRy MoThErFuCkIn DaY bRo!  
Yeah, Equius, pretty much everyone tells Gamzee that every day. 
Equius says he wants get some things off his chest, which giving what we later learn about troll relationships might be adulterous. Gamzee tells him not to let his feelings be bottled up lIkE a FuCkIn AlL sHaKeD uP bOtTlE oF fAyGo and this metaphor makes Gamzee thristy. Equius berates Gamzee for drinking soda, which seems harsh but we later find out soda is booze for trolls. He’s also angry at Gamzee for doing sopor slime. Now, fans think Karkat didn’t like Gamzee doing sopor slime but we never actually see it. It’s just Equius who cares. This leads to an exchange I find interesting.
CT: D --> You will stop
TC: WhOaAaA, i WiLl?
TC: hOw Do YoU kNoW tHaT?
CT: D --> No, you don't understand
CT: D --> It's not a predi%ion, it's an order
CT: D --> I command you to stop
Gamzee is so passive he finds it hard to imagine making decisions that will change his future. Sad. And when Gamzee does get what Equius means:
TC: Oh, AlRiGhT bRoThEr.
TC: yOu MoThErFuCkIn GoT iT.
CT: D --> What
CT: D --> Are you serious
TC: yEaH.
TC: I mEaN, yOu GoT tO sHoW sOmE fAiTh In YoUr FrIeNdS, cAuSe ThEy'Re AlL tHe OnEs WhO'rE bEiNg To LoOk OuT fOr YoU.
TC: sO fUcK iF yOu SaY i'M nOt DoInG tHe ShIt RiGhT, tHeN wHaT tHe MoThErFuCk Do I kNoW!
CT: D --> No
CT: D --> This is una%eptable
CT: D --> Ok, let's start over
CT: D --> I apologize
CT: D --> I was completely out of of line, and I'm sorry
CT: D --> I have no right to talk to you like that, or tell you what you can't do
TC: aWw, No WoRrIeS!
Gamzee was ready to kick sopor slime except Equius backed down. Wondering about the timeline where Equius didn’t back down. 
Still, Equius begs Gamzee to behave like a superior. Gamzee asks what that means and Equius gives a very creepy answer.
CT: D --> 100k, it isn't that difficult
CT: D --> Try to be cognizant of your desires and needs
CT: D --> And attempt to regard those around you as simple vehicles meant to bring about your gratification
At least Equius is a hypocrite...most of the time.
Equius asks what Gamzee is doing and Gamzee relates his adventures in Sgrub. He bonked an imp on the head and scared another with a horn and eventually ended up sharing pie with them. Equius likes the tales of valor but is disappointed with the peaceful end. 
Equius asks Gamzee to roleplay and Gamzee says yes; there’s an uncomfortable sequence where Equius tries to get Gamzee to virtually dom him. Gamzee is terrible at being assertive, but Equius is still whipped into a state of contrition. Basically, Equius is getting off on this. 
CHEL: It should be noted that tricking a child into sexual behaviour is a form of abuse even when it’s done by a child of the same age. Not cool, Eq, and not funny, Hussie.
CALL CPA PLEASE: 11
CLOCKWORK PROBLEMATYKKS: 40
SEND THEM TO THE SLAMMER: 4
Though, while that is clearly the reading we’re meant to get from that, I have to say Equius never reads to me like he’s actually enjoying being ordered around. With Gamzee he’s just frustrated that he’s not behaving in a correct manner, and in later exchanges he seems knocked off-balance by the normal social order being upended. I know I’m just projecting, but it reads more like he has some issues with anxiety or OCD and is desperate for someone else to take control and tell him what they want him to do so he doesn’t have to worry. He sweats constantly during these exchanges, which is supposed to imply he’s aroused, but people sweat when they’re worried or afraid too.
FAILURE ARTIST: On a lighter front, Equius says he doesn’t live near the ocean, which considering his neighbor regularly goes on a pirate ship is an odd thing to say.
CHEL: How near is “near”? He might just mean not within walking distance so he can’t casually wander out to the sea like Gamzee does.
FAILURE ARTIST: Equius ends by wondering about the social order that puts someone like Gamzee above him but someone as graceful and poised as a certain mysterious she is of the lowest caste. Gamzee (and the readers) ask who she is and Equius brusquely says D -->I shouldn’t be talking about this D → You’re the enemy before signing off. 
CHEL: If one’s been paying attention, one can guess.
Next, Equius and Vriska are in cahoots. Cahoooooooots. Vriska declares her intention to meddle, and they have a brief exchange about sarcasm. It’s horribly inconsistent whether trolls have sarcasm or not, as I’ve pointed out before. Already gave a point for it, though.
Anyway, Vriska asks if Aradia’s present is finished. It is.
CT: D --> But I don't understand why you're intent on gratifying that worthless peasant
AG: 8ecause I promised I would and it's none of your damn 8usiness! Man.
Their plan is to let Aradia usurp Sollux as leader with her cute little ploy (recall her sending him to sleep and letting him swallow mind honey earlier), then both snatch power from her and become joint leaders. Each asks the other if they’re planning something sneaky and each insists they’re not. Equius can sense that Vriska is trying to read his mind, and when she won’t stop, he takes control of her cybernetic arm, which he built, and makes her slap herself in the face.
FAILURE ARTIST: So given that Vriska tried to read Equius’ mind, despite the dangers (both physically and mentally), it is unbelievable she refrained from reading Karkat’s due to delicacy. 
I think Hussie has said in his commentary that Vriska had a crush on Equius. The fandom prefers lesbian Vriska at this point and so has ignored that. YMMV on if there is evidence of a crush in the text but I find the idea amusing. 
CHEL: Equius goes to fetch the present for Aradia which he was supposed to give to Vriska.
You naturally will doublecross your accomplice, just as you assume she has plans to doublecross you. You assume she is assuming the same of you. Business as usual for blue bloods.
How the hell does this society get anything done?
You will deliver it to Aradia yourself to gain her favor, and then doublecross her and take your rightful position as team leader. How ironic that someone of your blood purity must work to win the favor of the lowest sort of peasant. Humiliating. Strangely titillating, even. But in the end, class order will be restored.
He takes the tarp off the present, and it is…
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Why, Aradia. It appears the red glass of your eye has caught the pink and green glint of the moons in their perigees. The sweet poetry almost makes a man forget how the grime that once filled your veins made his stomach turn. It is a good omen for illicit lovers. Could you imagine the scandal if anyone found out?? No one must ever know.
But worry not. Your heart will pump no more of that despicable red sludge. You have been given a new heart. You can be taught the ways of the class you were always meant for. No one is beyond redemption.
Be grateful, dear Aradia. For the first time in your meaningless life you have met a man with true compassion.
Jesus fucking Christ. See what I meant when I said his interactions with girls were worse than his posters? No points because it’s supposed to be creepy, and with the teachings of his society it’s not entirely his fault, but wow.
FAILURE ARTIST: Well, his interaction with a girl is creepy. His relationship with Nepeta is more problematic than fans remember but that’s two-sided and not infatuation. As for Vriska, he’s cold and business-like with her. He collaborates with GA but that’s off-screen and was probably also business-like. Meanwhile, he has lustful interactions with most every male character. We’ve seen how he acts with Gamzee and we’ll see more later. Equius’ interactions with guys are another example of Hussie using male attraction to other males as a punchline.
CHEL: But yes, he’s built her a robot body. Unfortunately for everyone involved, while making out with it, he feels judged by one of his battlebots, gets angry, and punches it. It goes flying out the window and robosplodes above the valley, and its remains hit Vriska’s doomsday device, setting it off. It breaks before it can actually destroy the planet, but the chains holding it up snap, sending it swinging into the cliffside, causing another explosion. The cliff collapses, taking part of Equius’ hive with it, sending Aurthour plummeting into the chasm and crushing Vriska’s spider lusus under tons of rubble.
Cutting back to before that, we see Terezi battling imps on her treehouse’s rooftop, when Vriska messages her, declaring that playing the game together means breaking their truce. Terezi says that’s not what the truce was about; it was about STOPP1NG TH3 3NDL3SS CYCL3 OF R3V3NG3 and Vriska not using her powers maliciously anymore. Terezi’s next couple of comments are just calling Vriska a liar so I’ll just take Vriska’s, to further illustrate her behaviour.
AG: Man, you like to give me such a hard time a8out all that. I can't catch a 8reak! AG: Can't you see I'm trying to put all that 8ehind me and make amends with every8ody? AG: No, of course you can't see that. What am I saying! [...] AG: I'll prove it to you. I'm giving Aradia a present that will make her feel all 8etter finally. AG: Then I'll 8e in the clear. Phew! Totally redeemed. You'll see. I mean smell.
Vriska appears under the impression that large flashy gestures are the important part of an apology, not actual sincerity. Terezi points out Aradia doesn’t care about anything anymore and probably won’t care about this.
AG: Man, why can't you cut me some slack for once???????? AG: It's not like I even did anything that 8ad to you. AG: I lost seven eyes 8ut you only lost two! I would say you came out ahead in the 8argain. GC: 1 KNOW GC: 4ND 4CTU4LLY GC: 1 N3V3R R34LLY GOT TH3 CH4NC3 TO TH4NK YOU >:D
Vriska’s disbelief aside, Terezi really is serious here. Not surprising to the reader, her blindness is basically a superpower.
AG: Remem8er Team Scourge? How convenient all that must 8e to have forgotten! You were so nasty. AG: Oh man, if you crossed Terezi Pyrope you were fucked!!!!!!!! GC: Y34H 1F YOU W3R3 4 B4D GUY GC: W3 W3R3 SUPPOS3D TO B3 L1K3 4 V1G1L4NT3 DUO D1SP3NS1NG JUST1C3 GC: 4ND YOU COULD T4K3 TH3 B4D GUYS HOM3 4ND F33D TH3M TO YOUR STUP1D SP1D3R GC: BUT 1NST34D YOU JUST F3D H3R 3V3RYBODY! GC: 4ND L13D 4ND L13D 4ND L13D
Okay, this little exchange needs some more dissection. Terezi is supposed to be the “good cop” of Team Scourge, the by-the-book one on the side of the law. But we saw what Alternian law is like, and later on we’ll see demonstrations that things such as having a birth defect or, according to Hiveswap, owning fiction which so much as mentions the possibility of rebellion, are punishable by death. Not only is this not making Terezi look any better, if she’s as obsessed with the law as we saw, who would she deem not a “bad guy”, and why would Vriska have such a shortage of “bad guys” that she’d need to take anyone else? Hussie appears to have forgotten that the Alternian concept of justice is different from the Earth one.
FAILURE ARTIST: And what we would consider a “bad guy” wouldn’t be the same on Alternia. There’s tons of trolls murdering other trolls on Hiveswap Friendsim without any hint that’s illegal. It’s probably completely lawful for a highblood to kill a lowblood just because the lowblood annoyed them.
WHITE SBURB POSTMODERNISM: 29
BRIGHT: Maybe. I’d say what this shows us, and is intended to show us, is that Terezi’s sense of justice isn’t just based on Alternian law, but on her own moral code. The law made it perfectly acceptable for Vriska to feed lowbloods to her lusus regardless of whether they’d done anything, but Terezi didn’t think it was right, and for her that superseded the law. She’s the ‘good cop’ not because she always follows the book, but because she’s willing to ignore it.
We also know she thought Vriska was on the same page as her. Note that Terezi makes two accusations here — the first is that Vriska killed people who don’t deserve it, and the second is that Vriska lied to Terezi about doing so.
CHEL: That may be what it’s intended to show us, but what we’ve already seen is that she worships the law; she draws and gleefully licks pictures of the head of the troll court, His Honorable Tyranny, and she shows no concern in her roleplay with hypothetically executing people for relatively trivial crimes. That makes this a bit… shaky, IMO.
BRIGHT: True. Terezi may have stopped killing since her FLARP days (or, at least, we get no indication that she’s still doing so), but it doesn’t seem to have shaken her belief in the Alternian legal system. Just her belief in Vriska, who even brings up a similar point.
AG: Well if you want to know what I think, you should start changing your tune. AG: Cause even though you got all these highfalutin morals and fancy reserv8tions, you know as well as me that a killer is a killer is a killer! AG: There 8n't no ch8nging your ways for good, and one d8y you're going to flail that silly l8ttle cane of yours and not find n8thin to 8ump into, and fall f8ce first into the shit ag8in. AG: And you're going to do something t8rri8le to some8ody and wish you could t8ke it 8ack 8ut you c8n't!!!!!!!! AG: And then you'll work hard to win 8ack their trust, and you'll try and try and tr8, and you'll see how hard it is! AG: You'll seeeeeeee!
Vriska’s making this all about her own feelings about Terezi abandoning her, but she’s not wrong.
Vriska hears the doomsday device exploding and the subsequent rockslide, and goes to  find out what it is. Terezi tells her not to get crushed.
The next page jumps back in time again -- this time, quite far back. Terezi’s eyes are normal, and she’s talking to Aradia about Tavros’s recovery. Aradia says he’s probably paralysed for life. Terezi brings up the possibility of getting him robo-prosthetics, but after the Vriska debacle Aradia is firmly against having anything to do with bluebloods.
CHEL: Terezi warns Aradia that revenge attempts will end badly and she wants to handle it. Aradia says Vriska isn’t able to control her, but Terezi says Vriska will find a way to harm her anyway. They lament how they were both distracted by the same person.
AA: wh0 was he anyway GC: PR3TTY SUR3 1T WAS VR1SKAS FR13ND AA: what was he d0ing there AA: watching us GC: WHO KNOWS GC: H3S NOT R34LLY H3R FR13ND THOUGH GC: YOU SHOULD S33 HOW H3 T4LKS 4BOUT H3R B3H1ND H3R B4CK GC: SH3 H4S NO 1D34 HOW B4D H3S PL4Y1NG H3R GC: BUT TH3N 1 DONT TH1NK H3 KNOWS HOW B4D SH3S PL4Y1NG H1M 31TH3R
This sounds like they mean Equius, but we’ll see. Aradia feels she’s letting Vriska win by doing nothing, but Terezi has a plan. She confirms that her friendship with Vriska is over.
Cut to Aradia’s house, and here I need to go into a bit more detail. This is her house:
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Aradia’s a maroonblood, the lowest of the low on the hemospectrum, peasantry and cannon fodder and supposedly extremely numerous. Yet her house looks to be about the size of the entire block of flats I live in, and she lives in it alone, with no other buildings at all in sight. In the next page, we see inside her house, which looks exactly the same as all the others; she has piles of roleplaying books and posters and a computer, and nothing looks to be in disrepair.
WHITE SBURB POSTMODERNISM: 30
BRIGHT: Her house also looks a lot like Tavros’s, what with the windmill feature on top and the brown hangings rather than maroon, which threw me off at first.
CHEL: We’ll talk about this more later. For now, let’s stick with the most noticeable thing; Aradia is alive! Her skirt is untattered and her eyes have colour and pupils. Her lusus is alive too, napping beside her. It’s not quite clear what it is exactly; it has a sheep-like head, but its body is long and slim with much bigger hind legs than forelegs. Could be supposed to be dragon-like? I’ve also seen it interpreted as kangaroo-like. I don’t think we ever get a better view of it.
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Anyway, Aradia knows Terezi’s advice is sound, but she can’t bear not to do something to Make her pay. She puts her hands up to her temples, and the image fades back and forth with one of wrapped troll corpses in Spidermom’s web…
It's a shame it had to come to this. You don't like summoning the spirits of the dead to settle scores.
But if she had to face her victims again, maybe she'd finally learn to feel remorse.
OOOOOOOOOO
This begs the question, how the fuck can the highbloods oppress people who not only hugely outnumber them but can shoot lasers from their eyes, control animals, and summon the dead at will? Well, there’s actually some explanation for that. The player trolls all appear to have unusual levels of power, for whatever their given powers are; most maroonbloods can’t do this. In Hiveswap a main character is a more typical maroonblood, who can just about bend spoons with his telekinesis and not much else (though we haven’t seen him speak with dead yet, and it’s possible he’s better at that). Not all trolls even have their caste’s powers, as far as I can tell, as we do see a yellow in Hiveswap Friendsim who’s not a psionic and some ceruleans who don’t seem to have mind-control powers as well. Head or eye injuries, which aren’t exactly rare in Alternia, can cause the loss of said powers. Also, the highest blood castes have powers of their own and other things to hold over the lowbloods’ heads. It’ll be a while till we get to that, but I’ll say now it is convincing, we do not have an Oppressed Mages scenario.
Anyway, Aradia does her thing…
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As Vriska cowers on her floor, White Text Guy messages her again. Vriska replies angrily, ghosts looming over her shoulders.
Aren't you going to kill her?
AG: Who????????
Your friend.
The one who summoned the spirits.
AG: Will that make them go away?
Does it matter?
She brought them here to torment you. This obviously warrants revenge.
Vriska asks why WTG doesn’t kill Aradia instead, since he helped kill Tavros; he replies “All I did was stand somewhere for a few minutes. I just gave you an opportunity to do something you wanted to do anyway.” So, seems it wasn’t Equius they meant earlier. Vriska protests she never intended to kill her gaming companions, and blames him.
Again, I didn't talk you into anything, nor am I doing so now.
You were, and are, going to do this regardless.
I only ever place myself into positions of tangential involvement with events that will bring about my employer's entry into this universe.
I oversee the events as they take place, and ever so slightly nudge them into motion when necessary.
BRIGHT: Looks like Aradia and Terezi haven’t told her Tavros survived, which is eminently sensible. This conversation also highlights another Vriska trait: That she’s a very active person, but will try to shift responsibility as soon as she doesn’t like the consequences. That could be a result of her upbringing -- Vriska had to actively go and kill people for Spidermom, but she wasn’t responsible for the overall situation. (Although -- how much did she do to ameliorate it? By the time SGRUB starts, Spidermom’s far too big to fit into Vriska’s home. Vriska might have been able to get away with not feeding her at that point; there’s not much Spidermom can do if she can’t get to her.)
CHEL: The later addition to the canon, Pesterquest, claims that the lusii can psychically nag their charges and she could bother Vriska that way, but that directly contradicts Act 5, in which the trolls want to prototype their lusii so that they’ll be able to communicate properly with them for the first time, and also couldn’t Vriska just move further away?
BRIGHT: Inertia is very much a thing, and people do often just settle into a rut of ‘this is the way things are’ even when something could be changed, so it’s not improbable that it wouldn’t occur to Vriska to move — come to that, I don’t believe it occurs to anyone else either — but the fact that it doesn’t occur to her does say something about her character. 
CHEL: Also, why didn’t Vriska feed the spider on animals? The possibility is never so much as considered by her or anyone else, though it seems the most obvious thing to do. Sure, the spider might be picky, but as we said, it can’t leave the valley due to its size, or it’d be hunting for itself. If it’s left with the choice to eat cows or die, it’d presumably pick the former, especially since the lusii aren’t supposed to be sapient and thus wouldn’t have the capacity for spite. For assuming that Vriska did what she had to when such a screamingly obvious better option is never addressed, here we go with a new count, which will rise whenever Vriska’s horrible actions are excused.
ALL THE LUCK: 1
 Back to the scene, Scratch claims omniscience, which Vriska mocks.
AG: Sure you know a lot, 8ut I know for a FACT there's stuff you don't know.
That's true.
But the gaps in my knowledge exist by design.
They are the pillars of shadow on which my comprehensive vision is built.
Necessary pockets of void meant to effectuate outcomes I've foreseen and which will require my influence.
Each dark pocket, in time, will be filled.
[...]
I don't lie.
Deception is only necessary for those like you to achieve their objectives.
I play with my cards face up.
Isn't it funny how during our various matches, I can tell you what my moves will be in advance, and still win?
Vriska, angered by this, does in fact plan to kill Aradia; Not much point in living with all these moaning spooks just to spite some guy you don't give a shit about. She can’t control Aradia because Aradia’s own powers get in the way, but there are other people she can use.
How about this guy? Unfortunately, you can only control him about half the time.
Then again, that should be all the time you need.
Cut back to Aradia’s place, and she receives a message from Vriska, telling her her boyfriend is outside. 
BRIGHT: Vriska also lightheartedly tells Aradia she’s sorry, and that she’ll make it up to ‘him’ someday. Presumably ‘he’ is meant to be Tavros, except that Vriska seemed to think Tavros was dead in literally the last conversation she had. This is probably just a slip-up on Hussie’s part, but it’s possible to read this as Vriska referring to a different ‘he’ entirely, considering what’s about to happen.
CHEL: Aradia looks, and sees a figure hovering telekinetically over the fields....
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Note what’s in his hand. You do not under any circumstances eat the mind honey… His eyes start flashing and Aradia looks afraid, but we suddenly cut to a view of Alternia, and then to a closeup of its green moon. The prompt instructs us to Be the white text guy, and we meet him in a very familiar-looking green mansion.
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You try to be the white text guy, but fail to be the white text guy. No one can be the white text guy except for the white text guy.
The white text guy is known as Doc Scratch.
He is an officer of an indestructible demon known as Lord English. His job is to pave the way for the arrival of his master, who will be summoned upon the termination of the universe. He has worked at this task for many centuries, and will continue to do so until THE GREAT UNDOING.
Scratch is Alternia's FIRST GUARDIAN. Every planet destined for intelligent life has such an entity meant to protect it, and facilitate the planet's ultimate purpose. A first guardian is typically almost as old as the planet itself, and each has a unique, circuitous origin through the knots of paradox space. They can be born into a great diversity of forms, though they all share a common, especially potent genetic sequence. 
Remember Rose’s MEOW book, and how DD used it to create Becquerel? Yep.
The code grants them near omnipotence, and when merged with a host of great intelligence, near omniscience as well.
BRIGHT: Only near-omniscence, however. Scratch is surprised to find Terezi contacting him, but he’s able to work out that she got Sollux to help pretty fast:
Occasionally I discover there are things I have not always known.
It gives me the opportunity to make deductions, which are practically always flawless.
It's gratifying.
He also suggests she call him ‘Mr. Vanilla Milkshake’, and then hints that Aradia might not be straightforwardly dead by stating that Sollux and Terezi believe she is dead, and will soon believe she is not, both of which are true statements about their beliefs rather than reality.
Props to Hussie on this: I’m pretty sure every Homestuck fan wants to punch Scratch in the face. He’s just so obnoxious. 
Terezi, however, refuses to let Scratch keep derailing her for long. She wants Scratch to get involved in their feud again, and she has a good reason for him: She knows how Vriska’s been able to come so close to beating Scratch in their games lately. Before she can tell him, though, she needs to talk to Vriska again.
She starts by asking how Vriska feels about killing Aradia, after she promised not to. Vriska responds with dramatic insincerity about how she feels awful, and then says Terezi should be happy that Team Charge is out of the picture. 
AG: Uuuuuuuugh, what do you want from me????????
GC: 1M NOT SUR3
GC: 1 GU3SS 1M LOOK1NG FOR SOM3 R34SON TO CH4NG3 MY M1ND
GC: 1 DONT KNOW WH4T YOU C4N S4Y TH4TLL DO 1T
GC: 1 SORT4 HOP3 TH3R3S SOM3TH1NG THOUGH
In the end, there isn’t. Terezi tells Vriska she’ll be dead in a couple of minutes, and to ‘CONSULT W1TH YOUR L1TTL3 4DV4NT4G3’ if she doesn’t believe it, then leaves the conversation.
Vriska’s little advantage turns out to be a MAGIC CUE BALL, which is similar to a magic 8 ball except that it’s predictions are specific and accurate, and it lacks a portal through which the user can read said predictions. Fortunately that’s not an obstacle for Vriska: Her VISION EIGHTFOLD allows her to see through the opaque casing.
CHEL: Vision Eightfold is the vision from the one of Vriska’s eyes which has seven pupils, which she covered with an eyepatch with seven rubies on it when she was FLARPing. Also remember that Jade had a Magic Cue Ball but couldn’t read it? Yeah, it’s another one.
BRIGHT: One other thing: According to rumour, it used to belong to the man on the moon.
As Vriska asks the cueball whether she should be worried about Terezi’s threat (answer: YES), Terezi lets Scratch know where his missing property has gone. Vriska asks the cueball how it’s going to happen…
I WILL EXPLODE IN YOUR FACE.
Boom.
This section is one of my favourite Terezi moments. It really shows off Terezi’s ability to outthink and manoeuvre people. She’s never spoken to Scratch before, but she still plays him against Vriska easily.
CHEL: This is why Vriska has a plain eyepatch and a robot arm in her future appearances, but she’s otherwise fine. Bluebloods are tough, apparently.
BRIGHT: Back in the future, Spidermom has survived the rubble falling on her, but just barely. Vriska puts her out of her misery with her magic dice, which summon up a massive guillotine and decapitate the lusus, drenching Vriska in spider blood.
GORE GALORE: 11
The decapitation sets off another landslide, sending Equius’s house straight down on Vriska’s head, but before it can land, a portal opens underneath it and transports it into the Medium.
Vriska promptly jumps on Trollian to freak out about this, because her plan depended on her getting Aradia’s surprise present from Equius to pass along and then Aradia and Vriska entering the Medium together, and never mind that a house was about to fall on her -- in fact, when Aradia points out that Vriska was about to die, Vriska accuses her of planning this. Aradia placidly agrees.
CHEL: This is part of my evidence for thinking Vriska might not be neurotypical. Not the priorities most people would have. Also, meanwhile, note that the lusii have the same blood colour as their charges, while the non-lusus animals Nepeta killed were black and had red blood. I’m not sure whether that’s a species trait, or a side effect of the weird bond between them (doesn’t make a lot of biological sense, but then this is basically fantasy with a sci-fi coat of paint).
Vriska is enraged by things not going the way she planned; her grand gesture of apology, the robot body, will now be handed over by Equius and not her, ruining her chance to be friends again with Aradia. Again, she doesn’t seem to understand how apologies work.
AA: were we ever really friends
AG: Yeah!!!!!!!!
AG: I don't know. I felt like we were even if you didn't think so.
AG: I guess I'm not very good at acting like a friend. Or saying stuff like, hey friend! You're my friend! It doesn't really occur to me.
For some strange reason related to her prototyping with the frog statue, Aradia types out “ribbit” into the chatbox, and informs Vriska she’s not on the Blue team as she expected, enraging Vriska further. Vriska accuses her of taking revenge, which Aradia denies, saying Vriska was always going to be on the Red team, and that she doesn’t care about her death.
AG: You're so infuri8ing! Why c8n't you just h8 me? It would 8e a lot easier th8t way.
AG: Or at least feel 8othered or annoyed or S8METHING! God!!!!!!!!
AG: May8e I sh8uld just rip my he8rt out of my chest and pound it to a 8loody pulp here on my desk with my sup8r strong ro8ot arm.
AG: Pound pound pound pound pound pound pound pound!
AG: Look at that, more nasty 8lue 8lood all over me. Why not! Might as well op8n the floodg8s and p8nt my whole hive with this oh so envia8le cerulean SWILL.
AG: 8ecause clearly it's up to me to feel em8tions for the 8oth of us, you misera8le soulless witch!
AA: 0_0
AG: I h88888888 you!
AG: H8 h8 h8 h8 h8 h8 h8 haaaaaaaate!
AG: I only regret killing you cause it m8de you so 8ORING!!!!!!!!
AA: s0rry
Aradia assures her that the teams are meaningless, but being on the Red team will put Vriska in the position they need her in. Vriska’s confused and angry, and leaves the chat.
In Equius’ LAND OF CAVES AND SILENCE, he trolls Aradia again, telling her he will be the sole leader, which she doesn’t care about. He’s surprised she isn’t objecting, and says he needs a towel.
CT: D --> Never mind
CT: D --> I'm trying to stay professional about this
AA: ab0ut what
AA: what are y0u talking ab0ut
CT: D --> Forget it
CT: D --> It's just pleasant to consort with one of lesser breeding who clearly understands her place
He’s been established to suffer from hyperhydrosis, but he’s clearly also supposed to be getting off on this, which, since he’s thirteen, is icky to read.
CALL CPA PLEASE: 12
It only gets worse.
CT: D --> I 100k forward to seeing how well you serve me, server player
AA: uh
AA: thats n0t quite the meaning 0f the w0rd server
CT: D --> What do you mean
AA: as y0ur server i manipulate y0ur envir0nment t0 help y0u advance
CT: D --> I don't understand
CT: D --> Are you
CT: D --> Are you saying
CT: D --> That
CT: D --> You are in a position of control over me
AA: i supp0se s0
CT: D --> Oh
AA: what
CT: D --> Oh my God
He babbles about how he needs fresh air or another towel, getting so agitated he actually drops an F-bomb, which he immediately covers up with “Fiddlesticks”. He says he wants to break something, and Aradia offers to break something for him, as she’s developed an interest in breaking things recently. Next page, she flings an “abluti0n trap” through his wall. 
FAILURE ARTIST: The running gag of girls fucking up boy’s homes with bathroom appliances continues!
CHEL: He’s very happy, except about her commoner slang.
CT: D --> In fact, this is an order from your leader
CT: D --> Call things by their proper names
AA: what
AA: y0u want me t0 call it a bath tub
AA: that s0unds ridicul0us
As FA noted, this bit of worldbuilding ends up retconned out with all trolls calling things by strange rewordings later on.
Whatever it’s called, Equius asks her to throw it through the wall again. She asks if that’s an order, and he can’t decide.
CT: D --> You could cause quite a bother for me, with the power you wield
CT: D --> I can do nothing to stop you, peasant girl
CT: D --> It's so magnificently depraved
CALL CPA PLEASE: 13
Aradia ribbits again and he takes it for roleplaying, but commands her to continue to do as she pleases. He tells her he’s bringing the robot body, and muses on whether she should actually be co-leader again; in fact, he decides, she should be the actual leader, in secret, through him. She points out that’s what they’re doing anyway.
CT: D --> You take to authority well for one of your b100d
AA: i d0nt have bl00d
CT: D --> Not yet
CT: D --> But soon your heart will beat anew, and through it, fresh b100d and fresh passion
AA: 0_0
CALL CPA PLEASE: 14
Equius proceeds to STRONGJUMP right up to his first Gate, punching off an ogre’s head as he goes, and to STRONGFALL out into LOQAM, where Aradia waits. Equius hands over the robot and Aradia enters it; she seems happy, but Equius cautiously asks if she feels anything else.
EQUIUS: D --> Can you detect anything within you might describe as
EQUIUS: D --> Smoldering passion
[...]
ARADIABOT: 0h g0d
ARADIABOT: 0H MY G0D WHAT DID Y0U D0!
ARADIABOT: did y0u pr0gram this r0b0t t0 have feelings f0r y0u?
ARADIABOT: R0MANTIC FEELINGS???
EQUIUS: D --> Hrrrk
ARADIABOT: ANSWER ME BLUE BL00D SCUM
EQUIUS: D --> I
EQUIUS: D --> Yes
EQUIUS: D --> Uh
EQUIUS: D --> It's a chip in your heart
EQUIUS: D --> Is that not ok
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Understandably, it is emphatically not.
GORE GALORE: 12
Now, this is undeniably a really, really, really creepy thing to do. I’m not sure how much blame can be applied to Equius here, though; he’s been raised in a society which would presumably tell him she would have to accept his advances no matter what, considering their caste difference. In a horrifying way, the chip might have been, in his mind, the nicer option. Still, as I said, creepy.
CALL CPA PLEASE: 15
BRIGHT: I think it’s telling that he asks if it’s not okay after Aradia freaks out, as though he honestly hadn’t considered that Aradia might have a problem with it. Specifically, up until that point, Equius seems to be interacting with Aradia more like she’s a prop than a person — it doesn’t seem to occur to him that she might not want what he wants, unless their wants conflict in a way that he finds titillating. Then she freaks out and he’s surprised. And that in turn speaks volumes about how lowbloods are viewed by highbloods in wider society.
Contrast Vriska, who absolutely realises that people down spectrum can have their own agendas and emotional reactions; she just does her own thing anyway. Vriska is actively malicious; Equius is, at least in this case, accidentally malicious. Note that he doesn’t make any effort to prevent her from removing the chip once he realises she’s distressed. (Not that he really gets a chance.)
Equius in particular also seems to have a problem about slotting people into roles in general -- he does it with Gamzee, too, although since Gamzee is higher-blooded than him, he has to at least face the fact that Gamzee doesn’t fit into his role. He comes across as very sheltered.
FAILURE ARTIST: Equius considers it such a good thing to be a highblood that he thinks he’s doing her the greatest favor by turning her into one. 
CHEL: This also brings up the question of where he got all that blue blood. I hope it’s synthetic. If not, he’s already said he doesn’t kill animals, so I’m not sure whether it’s creepier if he killed another troll for it or if he slowly drained it off from his own.
Aradia’s not contemplating that, too busy crushing the artificial heart and slapping the shit out of Equius for multiple pages, before, er…
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Yes, she’s apparently making out with him as a reward for violating her mind, even after the chip was removed. 
BRIGHT: The first time I read Homestuck, I thought that was meant to imply that not all of the programming was gone.
FAILURE ARTIST: Hussie did confirm the programming was gone. He compared it to a failed roofying.
CHEL: This is a bit of a shock, but it makes somewhat more sense when we see more of troll culture, not long in the future. Still, right now it’s probably upsetting for a number of readers because that part of troll culture hasn’t been established, so…
CALL CPA PLEASE: 16
CLOCKWORK PROBLEMATYKKS: 41
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reimenaashelyee · 5 years ago
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Inspiration and Calling
“Where do you get your ideas from?” “How do you choose which book to do?”
The short answer is, I don’t know?? Or rather, I can’t explain it. Or RATHER, I don’t think the real answer will be helpful, or even make sense, to anyone else except me.
Inspiration
Personally I don’t think anyone should worry so much over when or where their ideas will manifest. They will come.
But before we understand what I mean when I say “chillax, bro”, let me address a couple of assumptions about inspiration:
Inspiration as a Set, Determined, Concrete Process.
“If I don’t figure out how Inspiration with a capital I works, I will never find it. I will never be a real artist.”
What I’m referring to is this prevailing idea that that there’s a mystical Ideas Machine inside your head you need to find that, once you activate it, will instantly and forever feed you ideas, confirming your destiny as a creator. I mean, isn’t that the core implication behind “where do your ideas come from?”? It implies that there is a routine that all seasoned creators have obtained; a hidden knowledge to be passed down; a videogame-like skill to be levelled up to. Basically, people who ask this question… who don’t ask it solely out of plain, mundane curiosity… are looking for a clue to unlock their Ideas Machine.
What ends up happening is like the hundreds of Pocket articles I have read that tries to crack the code of what makes a start-up manager or self-made billionaire Productive. You wake up at 4 am. You drink the purest herbal tea from the Organic Highlands. You use the Pomodoro. You put robots in your brain. It’s hopeless. How one person finds inspiration or productivity is so individual that really, there is no One True Answer. No guaranteed process. No Ideas Machine.
Equating inspiration as survival or work.
This is the danger zone, imo. You know why? People who draw or write for fun (usually as a hobby) never ask where ideas come from. They just draw. They just write. The first time the question enters a hobbyist’s mind is when they transition from creating for themselves to creating beyond themselves; that is, to put up work for an audience, to get a book deal, to start a creative career. Some people remain stuck in this questioning stage and panic over whether they are a real artist who can make money if they can’t find the mystical Ideas Machine that seasoned creators seem to have. And we already know that doesn’t exist.
Which is why I think there’s no need to worry about the time and place of ideas/inspiration. There’s no need to find a process, or to base your capital value as a creator on the production of ideas. Just chillax bro. Eat a delicious meal. Watch a Netflix movie. Lie down on the grass. Laugh with your friends. Be cheerful, live well. As long as you’re living on this planet and experiencing the joys of society like Uncle Karl says you should, your brain will know what to do. Inspiration will come.
TL;DR be patient. Trust yourself. And eat your favourite dessert sometimes.
Marx recognized that the science of capitalistic economy, despite its worldly and pleasure-seeking appearance, “is a truly moral science, the most moral of all sciences. Its principal thesis is the renunciation of life and of human needs. The less you eat, drink, buy books, go to the theatre or to balls, or to the public house [ Br., pub], and the less you think, love, theorize, sing, paint, fence, etc., the more you will be able to save and the greater will become your treasure which neither moth nor rust will corrupt — your capital. The less you are, the less you express your life, the more you have, the greater is your alienated life and the greater is the saving of your alienated being. Everything which the economist takes from you in the way of life and humanity, he restores to you in the form of money and wealth. And everything which you are unable to do, your money can do for you; it can eat, drink, go to the ball and to the theatre. It can acquire art, learning, historical treasures, political power; and it can travel. It can appropriate all these things for you, can purchase everything; it is the true opulence. But although it can do all this, it only desires to create itself, and to buy itself, for everything else is subservient to it. When one owns the master, one also owns the servant, and one has no need of the master’s servant. Thus all passions and activities must be submerged in avarice. The worker must have just what is necessary for him to want to live, and he must want to live only in order to have this.” (link)
P.S: UNCLE KARL IS TELLING YOU TO TREAT YOSELF. That’s praxis!!
Here’s another quote I like that’s also relevant, but less “destroy late stage capitalism” and more “wow isn’t the world beautiful”:
Develop an interest in life as you see it; the people, things, literature, music – the world is so rich, simply throbbing with rich treasures, beautiful souls and interesting people. Forget yourself.
Henry Miller
That’s my answer for “Where do your ideas come from?”. The ideas comes from being alive. To develop and grow that garden of ideas – that is, life – , you have to immerse yourself in it. Not for money. Not for comments or followers or social media. Not for external confirmation that you’re a Real Creator. But for your own joy. For the love of living. When you immerse yourself in the garden you lose yourself. That’s what Henry Miller is talking about.
When you give in to the garden, it gives back to you. Being alive is inspiration. Inspiration is being alive.
James Webb Young’s five-step technique for producing ideas touches upon how living life is essential to creativity.
Calling
“How do you choose which books to do?” is more esoteric. I think the answer is more a Reimena Yee thing than it is most artists’ thing, though people like T.S. Eliot have come pretty close to describing my answer:
I choose the book which compels me.
This thing is not easy to describe. I don’t know. I am not sure if other comics creators operate primarily like this, or think of their work this way.
It’s different from the feeling
of finding a concept you want to write about
of being overexcited and hyperfocused by said concept
of self-indulging
It’s all of those feelings, but there’s an edge to it.
I have a few ideas in the backburner. Some of them are books I want to do. Some are books I really, really want to do. And one or two of them are books that compel me.
The sensation is like finding the perfect pet in the animal shelter. You see a dog or cat and come back to it over and over again. You can’t explain this feeling you are feeling, this deep-in-the-gut instinct that you’re meant for this animal. Eventually, you listen to your gut, you take the plunge, and you bring it home. Turns out, you’re right.
That’s what I mean by “compelling”.
There are certain books which I return to over and over again. In the beginning, the special book plants an imagery in my mind’s eye, then it plays it repeatedly. If this doesn’t stop after a year, and if I still feel like I’m meant for it, I accept my calling and take it.
But accepting the book comes with the simultaneous feelings of excitement and fear, joy and resignation. When I actually work on it, there’s not really a hyperfocus or overexcitement. It’s more like I’m listening to what it wants to be, and I carve it into existence slowly. When I feel the joy it’s not exactly self-indulgent… more like relishing in a purpose. It’s work. It’s a calling.
Sometimes a calling will be equated to passion. People talk about passion like it’s a feeling that burns and consumes you and motivates you to work through unreasonable hours or expectations. You know, the passion that exploitation thrives in. That’s how you know you are a Real Artist, they say.
But I have never felt passion like that? When I experience passion, I feel that I love the work. That I want the calling to happen. But there’s no anxiety in it. I don’t feel that I must get it done quickly or cater it for mass appeal, though I do have a preferred deadline and a hopeful expectation for an audience who will appreciate my hard work. But even if I break the deadline (maybe it has to be delayed another year) or end up having no support/audience, I am not worried. I just think “Well, it’ll happen regardless.” or “Yay, it’s already real. I am glad I did it.”
It’s got no fireworks. No algorithmic hurrah. No romance. I don’t go Natalie Portman Black Swan over the calling. Is that unimpressive? I don’t know. I only know it’s purposeful. And that it feels right. Maybe the word is not passion. Maybe the word is trust.
Maybe passion and trust are two sides of the same coin.
That’s all part of the “compelling” I feel for some books. They are the ones I don’t worry about because they are the ones I know will happen. So I pick them and give them the love and attention they ask for. It’s not a one-way relationship either. When you give in to the garden, it gives back to you.
So really, the answer to both questions is “I don’t know.” Because like, if you boil down my answers down to their most blase they are basically “Enjoy your life” and “Do what you like” – which are good answers in general, but don’t say anything about marketability or success or finding validation in an external party like a publisher or art director. They are useless answers.
Then again,
Maybe they are not.
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megalony · 5 years ago
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Protect you- Part 3
Here is another part of my bodyguard! Ben Hardy series, I hope everyone is enjoying it so far and thank you all for the lovely feedback it is appreciated.
Taglist: @lunaticspoem @butlegendsneverdie @langdonzvoid @jennyggggrrr @rogmeddows @radiob-l-a-hblah @rogertaylorsbitontheside @chlobo6 @rogertaylors-lipgloss @sj-thefan @omgitsearly @luckytrashgooprebel @scarsout @deaky-with-a-c @killer-queen-ofrhye @bluutac @vousmemanqueez @jonesyaddiction
Series taglist: @onceuponadetectivedemigod @coldmuffinpartycloud
Series masterlist
Enjoy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Setting down the tea towel in his hand, Ben rested his hip against the cupboard beneath the counter in the kitchen as his arms folded over his chest. His stance didn't look relaxed, but then again Ben never looked nor felt relaxed. He looked like he was thinking or analysing, ready to strike if needed which was the way he liked to be.
He let his eyes lock on the girl sitting on the sofa who was capturing his attention but not fully, he always had to keep his mind working, keep the ball rolling just for precautionary reasons. But she did look like a beacon of light to Ben and he could do nothing but admire her.
The blond scanned his eyes over her as he watched her work. There was a rather large stack of papers sitting on her lap which were joined together by a hole punched into the corner with a treasury tag looped through them. This allowed (Y/n) to easily highlight words or sentences, add a hyphen, comma or full stop here and there. She used red ink for mistakes, green for added words or phrases and black for general notes in the margins. There were small rectangle sticky notes on some pages in the right-hand corner placed very carefully and neatly in all different colours to code what they were for.
(Y/n) had her highlighters and pens lined out on the coffee table in front of her laptop which was open on a thesaurus page for when she couldn't think of the right word. Ben found himself internally smiling when she would pull back, tip her head back and spin her finger or hand in a circle in the air when she tried to think. She would quietly mumble the sentence to herself to try and get her brain to find the word she was searching for before ultimately turning to the computer for help.
It seemed like a fulfilling job to have, being an editor because (Y/n) got the satisfaction of helping to write and perfect a novel without having to go through writer's block or creating the characters or the plot.
(Y/n) could make the phrases make sense or add punctuation to make them easier to read. She could highlight the good parts and highlight lines that just needed tweaking. She could feel happy that she was reading yet improving the story at the same time which readers never got to do. Plus she could work from home. She could get up whenever she wanted or sleep whenever she wanted as long as she got a substantial amount of work done so that she didn't go over the due date.
Ben also noticed another nervous habit that (Y/n) had.
She seemed to be under the impression that if she had both earphones in at the same time, she would be in danger. That maybe someone would come through the door and she wouldn't notice or that something would happen without her notice. So she wore one at a time, switching every now and then to stop her ears from feeling the fuzzy, uneven way they did when you listened to music through one ear for too long. She didn't seem to realise that Ben had ears to and that if something happened he would most likely be the first one to notice.
"Want something to eat?" Ben questioned when he moved to stand beside the sofa she was perched on, looking rather comfy.
Leaning forward, (Y/n) paused the music playing from the laptop before turning her attention to Ben. A small smile on her lips as she glanced to the time before thinking over his offer. He noticed that when she was engrossed in her work, she seemed to forget that she was meant to eat and drink.
"I guess I'd better since it's past lunchtime." (Y/n) spoke quietly as she put the lid back on her pen before setting the stack of papers into her satchel that was resting by her feet. Ben watched in amusement as she packed her pens and highlighters back into her case before pushing herself to her feet. Following him through into the kitchen as he went to the fridge, scanning through the food they had stocked up on a few days ago.
"Pasta?" Ben questioned when his eyes set on the sauce in the fridge, reminding him of the pasta in the cupboard. He grabbed the sauce when he heard (Y/n) already getting two pans out and the pack of pasta.
Both of them stood side by side so their arms were lightly brushing against one another as they started to make dinner. the atmosphere feeling calm, normal even when (Y/n) turned the radio on to play quietly in the background. When the sauce and pasta were cooking on the stove, (Y/n) grabbed some plates ready as Ben took out the cheese from the fridge for later.
Turning his head, Ben looked at (Y/n) when she perched herself on the counter, her hands resting on her lap as she started to twirl the ring around her finger like the first time they met. He studied her for a moment as he leaned back against the counter behind him next to the stove. Watching as she looked down at her hands but lifted her eyes to look over at him as if she was plucking up the courage to ask or tell him something. Ben knew this situation was different for her and maybe it was hard. He doubted she found it easy to trust or talk to people and yet here she was with a bodyguard. That can't be easy for her whereas for Ben this was normal this was business as usual for him.
"Everything okay?" Ben asked, his head tilting to the side as (Y/n) looked up from her hands.
"C-can you tell me about yourself?"
Ben brushed a curl away from his eye as his brows rose at the question he wasn't expecting. This wasn't the same as the other jobs Ben usually did. The people he normally looked after had more people around them meaning that Ben wasn't particularly close to them. He was always around them and he protected them from any threat but Ben didn't get personal. He knew who he was protecting them from, what their routines were and any meds of problems but he didn't know them and they had no reason to know him.
With (Y/n) it was different.
(Y/n) didn't hang around with many people or work with people, she didn't have a busy life going here, there and everywhere. Ben was the only person around her at the moment and he knew about her and her life which didn't normally happen with his clients- not that he minded at all. He just wasn’t used to talking about himself, he didn't normally get personal or friendly because it could take his mind from the job. But recently his life was spent with people for such a long time and he didn't get out with friends. Making a friend this way wasn't so bad or so different. It might do them good to get a little closer, there were no rules holding them back.
"If you shouldn't, I- I get it-" The longer it took for Ben's response the more (Y/n) thought he was trying to think of a kind way to tell her there were boundaries between them.
"No, no it's okay... I just don't usually find myself talking to the people I protect about personal stuff. It's nice. What do you want to know?" Ben rubbed his hand along his sharp jawline before he turned so his side was facing (Y/n). Allowing him to stir the sauce and pasta around so they didn't stick to the sides of the pan.
"Just... your life. What you studied, any places you've been to... why you chose this job. Maybe if I... I know I can..." (Y/n) knew what she was thinking but she couldn't find a way to say it.
Her life had been plain, then frightening and then back to worrisome plain again. She didn't travel, she didn't have friends apart from Joe and about two people she wasn't really in contact with anymore. She had this job all her life, only went to college and not university. (Y/n) was too afraid to have hobbies or go out very much but Ben was different. He had a different and intriguing job and life, he had done more than she had and she wanted to experience that through his memories.
"You think if I tell you, you won't have missed out." Ben spoke in a rather soothing tone that showed he understood. Watching as she bowed her head but nodded all the same. "Well... I took photography and drama at college, photography at uni which I really enjoyed, that's where I met Joe. I used to play rugby with a few mates at the weekend, that was when I used to work at a club as a bouncer. It was alright, but I wanted something different... protecting people seemed interesting to me. Just after uni me and three of my mates went on a sort of 'boys holiday'. We went to LA and then Vegas, I didn't like the heat but Vegas was really fun. You ever gone anywhere, love?"
Ben continued to stir the pasta and sauce for a moment longer before turning so he was fully facing (Y/n). Resting his hand beside her on the counter as he watched the unhappiness flood her eyes as she shook her head.
"Family holidays to Scotland or Dorset before... everything happened. I couldn't face university. Joe bumped into me at a coffee shop but I just stay home other than seeing him. How long have you been doing this?" (Y/n) didn't want the conversation to dwindle to nothing but it would if they continued to focus on her. She wanted to know Ben's life, she wanted to live it and see what he liked and what made him choose this life.
"Ooh... about four years now, since I was twenty-four. I like protecting people who need it. It's satisfying, empowering." For the first year or two, Ben had to build up his career. He went from stopping people from entering clubs or throwing them out to walking in front of beside someone who needed helping. But that meant he took any job he could get and some of those were people who really didn't need protecting they just didn't want to bother with the media. When people took him seriously and saw he was good at his job he took on people who were helpless, who were vulnerable and needed that extra help to get through the day or to get someone to leave them alone.
"What's the longest you've worked for someone?"
"Five months, when I was starting out. I don't have a time limit, if someone- you, for example, need me then I won't leave you. It's my job to protect people no matter how long for." If someone needed Ben to stay he could never just quit but if they wanted him to go then he would leave then and there because there was no point following them around and guiding them when they weren't in danger anymore.
"Doesn't that... screw up relationships and friendships?" (Y/n) knew what it was like to ruin a friendship but Ben was different. He was normal, he could have friends and he could go out without fear. Surely being someone's bodyguard for weeks or even months on end would ruin any relationship he tried to have or friendships.
"Relationships, yes. Friendships, not so much. Friends are different, they don't rely on you in the same way. My friends know my job and we still meet up or call. I've made it work once, it didn't end because of my job but others have. I don't really mind, this is what I want to do. What about you, love? I'm guessing staying in here doesn't always help you either?"
Ben couldn't always be there when a partner needed or wanted him to be. He protected people and a lot of the time that was twenty-four-hour protection, it was hard being in a relationship when he worked those kinds of hours and for long periods of time. But Ben loved his job and he didn't want to stop just yet, a relationship wasn't needed anyway, he was fine as he was. But he guessed with (Y/n), she stayed at home, she worked at home, she felt safe here. Going out into the world and being with someone would take her out of her comfort zone which Ben guessed she didn't leave very often.
"I... I've never..." (Y/n) pressed her lips into a thin line as Ben's eyes went wide but he didn't laugh or smile or taunt her like she was afraid of. He looked... sad.
"No one?"
"I didn't really leave home... people at school knew about the trial and at college I was that kid that went to the tutor's office or had a panic attack. I don't go out, kinda hard to meet people from in here."
Moving his hand, Ben rested his palm over the back of (Y/n)'s hand as a small but sad smile pulled at his lips for the first time since they had met. He couldn't help but feel it was a sad shame for her, she was beautiful, clearly intelligent and yet she felt the need to hide away for her safety. Those men were in prison and yet she still didn't have that safety or confidence to go out and meet people.
He wanted to help her change that.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Glancing his eyes from the dimmed screen of the phone in his hands to the door, Ben narrowed his eyes as he saw (Y/n) standing in the doorway to his room- well, her spare room. Looking back to his phone Ben noticed it was half eleven at night. (Y/n) had gone to her room about an hour ago and Ben hadn't heard her moving around for about half an hour. It seemed to be normal that after two or three times of her moving around the room or looking out the curtains, Ben would head in and stay with her until she fell asleep. He would either sit in the old leather armchair by her bed or lean against the wall and look out the window to calm her down.
He thought she would have been asleep by now.
"You alright, love?" He questioned as he turned on the side lamp before locking his phone and setting it on the table. He pushed himself to sit up as his eyes analysed (Y/n).
She was gripping the door handle with her left hand as her right hand was pressed to her lips, showing she was biting down on her thumb out of old nervous habit. Ben could see there were fresh and old tears marking her features and her eyes were red-rimmed and bloodshot. Either she was too afraid to sleep or she had tried and it hadn't worked very well.
(Y/n) felt stupid, she felt childish like a toddler who was going into their parent's room during the night because they were afraid of the dark. But she didn't know what to do. It got so hard when nightmares or flashbacks plagued her mind. Sometimes she would cry, sometimes she would sit and stare at the walls until she felt like she was going insane. Other times she could rock herself back and forth until her mind was so exhausted she had to lie down and everything slowly turned black. But tonight was different. Ben was in the next room and screaming or crying would alert him. Going insane always felt awful and she wanted help.
"I... I don't know w-what to do." (Y/n) pressed her lips together to stop her lower lip from wobbling but a shudder ran through her as tears soaked into her features. She didn't have to explain for Ben to know she was having a rough time sleeping and both of them were unsure what Ben could to do help but they both knew he would try.
Moving his hand, Ben waved her to come over to him rather than standing a few feet away hiding as if he was going to shout at her or tell her to go back to bed. (Y/n) chewed on what was left of her nail on her thumb, feeling like a child as she closed the door before slowly padding along the grey speckled carpet before sitting on the edge of Ben's bed with him. She didn't know what she was expecting Ben to do, wave a wand and make everything okay, hug her, talk to her and calm her down. Just to calm her down and make her feel safer than this.
"Nightmare or no sleep?" Ben questioned as he thought of the best way to go about this.
Slowly he wrapped an arm around her shoulders to see if the touch was alright before he tugged her so she was laying down. He moved the cover over them both before turning off the lamp which was beginning to hurt his eyes from being in the dark for a while. Ben knew this wasn't strictly professional, he was meant to protect her not cuddle her but at the same time, he could still protect her from her fears.
Keeping his arm around her waist, Ben lifted his head as he watched (Y/n) burrow her head into the pillow. Her hand moving to take his own, their fingers interlocking.
"Nightmare." (Y/n) whispered, feeling Ben's breath fanning against the back of her neck.
"I'm afraid I can't stop them from happening, love. But I can stay and try to chase them away with you." Ben couldn't lie, he couldn't tell her that no nightmares would plague her when she was with him here because that would be lying. But he could promise he wouldn't leave her and that if she tried to overcome this, he would try and help.
(Y/n) pulled Ben's arm that little tighter around her, feeling his chest pressing a little closer to her back as she felt her brain calming down significantly than to when she had been sat on her own in the dark.
"I'll protect you."
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queeryourgame · 5 years ago
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Community Values, Guidelines & Rule Enforcement
Community Values
Queer Your Game is an international multi-game LGBTQIA+ only gayming community. We aim to provide our Gaymers with a protected cross-platform environment where we can all enjoy ourselves, meet new gay™ people from all over the world and gayme together safely. Queer Your Game welcomes all sorts of Gaymers regardless of gender, race, religion, nationality or level of skill. 
Our community is live on Discord and you can join us today!
We expect everyone to behave responsibly, kindly and respectfully toward one another across all platforms and games.
The following guidelines are not exhaustive and we reserve the right to change and amend them as our community grows and we learn. We’ll let you know when we do, but we expect all of you to read them, accept them and abide by them.
One last thing, safety is our main concern and to that end, we are offering a moderated space.
You are the heart of this community. The way you behave is the way we all behave and your integrity is our integrity. If you see someone that needs help, if you witness something that’s against our guidelines or just plain wrong, say something. Do something. Tell a mod, alert us on social media, stand up for your fellow Gaymer as you would like your fellow Gaymer to stand up for you and help.
Join Queer Your Game 👉 http://bit.ly/QYGDiscord 
Community Guidelines
Queer Your Game is an LGBTQIA+ only community. What does that mean? Well, it means that if you are cisheteroromantic AND cisheterosexual then you can’t be part of this community. We appreciate that you consider yourself one of our cishet allies and we understand that you might have a spouse/partner, family members, friends and acquaintances who are LGBTQIA+ that you care about and support. However, due to the nature of the gaming community at large, we wish to keep QYG open to LGBTQIA+ folks only. PS: If you are cisAromantic and/or cisAssexual and you consider yourself Queer, we welcome you.
Our community guidelines must be respected cross-platforms. You must also abide by the community guidelines and terms of services of the platforms you are using. On Discord, you must respect Discord’s guidelines, on Twitter, you must respect Twitter’s guidelines, on Xbox, you must respect Xbox’s guidelines, etc.
Queer Your Game is not yet a corporation but we will abide by the Digital Millenium Copyright Act (DMCA), the European Union Copyright Law (EUCL), the General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR), the World Intellectual Property Organization Copyright Treaty (WIPO and WCT) and the World Trade Organization (WCT) on copyright and intellectual property. If the copyright and IP organization of your region isn’t mentioned here, please know that if we are contacted by them regarding copyright and intellectual property transgressions by our users, we will consider their inquiries just as seriously as those from the organizations mentioned above.
While we are on the subject of copyright and intellectual property, it’s important you remember that we consider fanart and derivative work to be fair use. Fair use is a right, don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise. Using culture to express yourself and create your own representation is something that we at Queer Your Game actively encourage.
Reposting original art, derivative work, and fanart as your own without crediting the artist or appropriating art, derivative work, and fanart is forbidden. If we find out that you are stealing original art, derivative work, and fanart from the artists in our community—whether from Discord, Tumblr, Twitter, or anywhere else our users are present—for commercial purposes, you will be reported to said platforms, to the relevant authorities, and you will be immediately banned from Queer Your Game. Forever.
The sharing and/or promoting of illegal activities and illegal materials, like piracy, copyright and intellectual property infringement, betting and gambling, pornography, pornography involving children/animals/violence, political parties, etc. are forbidden in our community cross-platforms.
Please don’t use the community Discord and other platforms for your advertisement of any kind, unless you are affiliated with Queer Your Game and/or we have given you permission to do so. Yes, that includes charities and fandom projects. Do not ever ask for money or promote your Ko-fi, your Patreon, your PayPal, your Kickstarter, your IndieGoGo, etc. unless you are affiliated with Queer Your Game and we have given you permission to do so.
Remember when we said that your safety is our main concern at Queer Your Game? That starts with keeping your personal information secret. Do not ever share your personal information in our Discord Server or publically on our other platforms. If you want to share your personal information with a fellow Gaymer, add them as a friend and share what you wish to share via private direct messages.
Nobody at Queer Your Game, Admins or Mods, will ever ask you for your personal information in our Discord server—unless you are in the SOS channel and you are requiring immediate IRL assistance, and we do mean life or death situations.
If you are caught sharing another Gaymer’s personal information, you will be banned. If you obtained that information illegally, we will report you to the authorities in your country of residence.
To become a part of our gayming community you need to follow our application process. We do not allow Gaymers to have multiple accounts—especially if you have been kicked or banned and you’re trying to trick us into adding you again. Don’t do it.
If we catch you impersonating another Gaymer, you will be banned and reported.
By the way, don’t use offensive usernames. By offensive we mean insulting, discriminatory, violent, sexual, etc.. Oh and don’t copy another Gaymer’s username either.
We are running an 18 and older Discord server and we don’t mind you discussing all sorts of topics, including sex. I mean, we’re gay. It’s okay. Just don’t be inappropriate. Don’t link to porn, under 18 content, illegal content, or you know, all the stuff we already mentioned above. Don’t upload under 18 or NSFW content in the chat, don’t use porn/violent/discriminative GIFs, don’t swear like a sailor, don’t spam.
Using our community Discord for sexual acts or intercourse, the promotion of sexual services and the exploitation of children is prohibited.
We will have zero tolerance for Gaymers who bully, harass, verbally abuse or berate other Gaymers in-game, on Discord or any other platforms Queer Your Game is on. Hate speech is not okay. Do not promote violence against anyone, especially other marginalized folks. If we catch you bashing on someone, alone or in a group, you’re done.  
If you have a disagreement with someone or you’re getting upset and you feel like lashing out, find a Mod, take a break. If you can’t manage what’s going on in the moment, walk away, send us an email or DM us. Criticism should always be polite and constructive. In fact, one of the mottos we use in every aspect of our work at Queer Your Game is “To be a voice of criticism, be a force of proposition.” It’s good advice; you’re welcome.
Trolling in-game, on Discord and other platforms Queer Your Game is on is unacceptable. Don’t ruin the experience of other people. That goes for spoiling. Whether it’s about a game, a movie, a book, a tv show, just don’t spoil, okay? Now, we know some of you will want to talk about every bit of spoiler and juicy news out there so we made you a channel on Discord.
In-game, we expect you to show fair play, to win with dignity and lose with grace, and to support your fellow Gaymers and teammates. Cheating and hacking are prohibited. Respect in-game rules and codes of conduct. No friendly kills, no awoxing, no spawn killing, no stealing from other Gaymers, no destroying other Gaymers property. Oh and no botting.
Raging is a no-go. Don’t rage quit, don’t yell at your fellow Gaymers, don’t insult people, don’t swear excessively, etc.. If you can’t handle what’s going on in-game, if you know you’re going to lose it, walk away. It’s that simple.
Cooperation and support are promoted within Queer Your Game. We like transparency and we think that champions, raid leaders and more skilled Gaymers should lead and help and teach and theorycraft and strategize and all the good things that can advance their fellow Gaymers, their own teams, parties and guilds of Gaymers. Just don’t go around sharing all of that on social media unless it’s made clear that it’s okay or you’re the person who came up with it.
At Queer Your Game we consider ourselves proponents of social justice and equal rights. We also know what a lot of social media platforms and communities refuse to acknowledge: tech and media are not neutral and no community or person is apolitical. While we encourage conversation and we understand that nobody’s perfect and no content is unproblematic, we want everyone to have the opportunity to enjoy the diversity of our community as they have fun, share, learn, educate themselves and grow. We expect all Gaymers to be on their best behavior. If you witness any of the following behaviors, report it to a Mod.
Racism, anti-blackness, xenophobia, white supremacy, Islamophobia, antisemitism, cultural appropriation, and bigotry will not be tolerated.
If you’re a transphobe or a TERF, don’t apply. We don’t want you. We also expect Gaymers to respect their fellow Gaymers’ pronouns. Misgendering will be sanctioned.
Sexism and misogyny won’t be tolerated. If you’re a white feminist, we don’t like you either. And if you don’t know what that is, we encourage you to check Google.
Ableism, food-shaming, fat-shaming, and all physical discrimination or belittling are rude and forbidden.
Don’t police, gatekeep, etc.. We have Mods and Admins, and we have guidelines. Your judgment of others is not required nor welcome.
Threats, incitation to violence and self-destroying behaviors, and any activity or conversation that could lead to your physical or emotional harm are completely forbidden and will get a Gaymer banned.
Suicide stunts or self-harm for attention-seeking, entertainment, or bad jokes will be sanctioned.
We have created an SOS text chat and voice channel on our Discord. Our intention is to provide a safe space for any Gaymer who would find themselves in a sudden and terrible struggle. If you are in danger, if you are in crisis, if you are experiencing a medical or mental health emergency, etc., anything that would require immediate assistance, you can, if you choose to, go into the SOS text and voice channels.
We want to make it clear that, even though our Moderators are notified that if they are alerted or see a Gaymer in an SOS channel, they should immediately check on them, we cannot shoulder the responsibility of your well being and your safety. We will not offer professional and trained support even if some of our Moderators and Admins could be trained professionals. For now, we can only provide you with a safe space and common sense help if we are able. We will call the police or an ambulance if you need them and we happen to be able to. We will stay with you if you require a presence. We will help provide you with crisis helpline phone numbers if they’re available where you reside so you can seek the appropriate help.
Please don’t abuse the SOS channels. We cannot stress enough that this specific gesture is a way for Queer Your Game to show you in action that we care. We are not in any position to be responsible for your safety and/or your well being and we do not make any promises of trained support or life-altering actions. Therefore Queer Your Game—as private individuals or as a corporation—is not liable for you.
Rule Enforcement 
Queer Your Game is a moderated space, on Discord, on Social Media, in forums, and in-game. We have Moderators, Admins, and Super Admins.
As a moderated space and community, Queer Your Game does, in fact, exercise a certain censure as described in our community guidelines. We reserve the right to change them, although we will let you know when that happens.
The appreciation of your violations and of your behaviors remain up to the discretion of our Mods, Admins and Super Admins. You can appeal a sanction, a temporary kick or ban, a definitive ban, etc. by emailing us at [email protected]. The decision to maintain, alter or lift your sanction(s) is also to the discretion of our Mods, Admins and Super Admins.
The offense system is as follows:
You can get warnings of different gravity in-game, in Discord chat or voice channels, in your mentions and in your DMs or PMs depending on the platform you commit your offense on.
If warnings don’t have an immediate impact on your behavior, you can be asked to a private conversation with a Mod, an Admin or a Super Admin on Discord.
A small offense will get you an email, a DM or a PM, possibly a temporary time out or kick, most likely a private scolding and a mark on your account.
A serious offense will get you the same treatment as a small offense, a definite scolding, a kick or ban for the length we deem fit, and you will lose your status in the community. When you come back, you will have to go through a return interview and you will start fresh as a Padawan Gaymer on probation.
A grave offense will mean your immediate kick from our Discord and a ban will be decided by our team of Mods, Admins, and Super Admins. You’ll receive an email informing you of your ban and our definitive decision.
We may ask for your opinions, thoughts, and ideas in polls and voting events.
We at Queer Your Game think strongly about the ethics of our project. We believe in transparency and in taking in different perspectives. To that end, we regularly consult with outside professionals in different fields and we are in the process of recruiting different individuals for our reference and sensitivity group.
Join Queer Your Game 👉 http://bit.ly/QYGDiscord
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stevenuniversallyreviews · 5 years ago
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Episode 123: Room for Ruby
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“It's sunny now, but it can always rain later.”
Catch and Release really did change everything. I’ve already discussed it as a paradigm shift, transforming the concept of what the Crystal Gems are: before, a quartet with Steven as the rookie, and after, a fluid group where Steven has some seniority. We’re in an era where Connie, a full-fledged human, is a Crystal Gem. Bismuth, who already was a Crystal Gem but got reintroduced and then left behind, will return as a member of the modern iteration. And two former enemies, Peridot and Lapis, have joined the group (the latter unofficially). So who’s to say a ruby soldier wouldn’t fit in?
Granted, Charlyne Yi’s performs a ruby that’s a little too forgiving, and power combo Raven Molisee (of the highly expressive Molisee’n’Villeco) and Jesse Zuke (of the barnmaster duo Zuke’n’Florido) exaggerate her face and words to the point where it’s at least a little suspicious from the start. But Navy, cleverly named for the gem on her navel just as Army is named for her arm gem, has always been friendly and chipper compared to the other rubies in her squad. It’s believable, despite us never witnessing it, that the other rubies are mean to her for this attitude. And because this is a ridiculous character, it was always possible that her ridiculously jolly attitude was sincere.
That Navy is lying the whole time is irrelevant to the wonder of a show that makes us believe that she might join up. Her betrayal might be predictable, but our status quo is as capable of change as the planet our heroes love; it’s a similar sensation to Alone at Sea, where even though nothing drastic happens there’s a real possibility that Lapis might relapse and go back to Malachite. It’s so much better than an episode where we know from the start that the character-of-the-week will depart by the end of the story.
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Navy’s chipper behavior is variably cute and questionable, but I love the massive hint that is the rain sequence. Gems become Crystal Gems when exposed to water, so Navy gets her own little baptism as part of the orientation. But because she’s a false convert, we get artificial rain for her artificial reaction. Yi sells absurd joy as well as absurd frustration, but there’s a cloud hanging over this moment that becomes clearer on rewatch. 
Despite beginning with Steven and Garnet, then bringing Navy along for the ride, Room for Ruby becomes a Lapis Lazuli episode as soon as we head back to the barn. Navy is as one-dimensional as it gets before the reveal, blithely accepting everything that comes her way and seeming incapable of feeling negative emotions, so she needs an external opponent if we want this episode to have a plot. Yes, it’d be fun to see this goofball being a goofball for eleven minutes, but thankfully Steven Universe is willing to go deeper.
Peridot’s bossiness and desire to impress makes her an excellent candidate to teach Navy the ropes, and both can bond with fellow shorty Steven over a shared go-get’em mindset. So it makes sense that our wet blanket is Lapis, who first distrusts Navy and then gets fed up with how easy everything is for her. She’s trying, but seeing another foe-turned-friend have such a smooth go of it isn’t easy, and exploring those emotions of jealousy and inadequacy allows for a wonderful last hurrah before Lapis abandons Earth in Raising the Barn.
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Lapis has a tricky role to play here, as she’s straddling the line between protagonist and antagonist depending on how much you trust Navy. Our hero/villain is portrayed sympathetically, as we’re reminded of her traumas and her slow but steady recovery process; she might come across as petty, but it’s understandable pettiness when Navy breezes by in areas where Lapis has struggled. And it helps that unlike fellow Ornery Lapis episode Barn Mates, Navy doesn’t seem to get upset at the negativity; this isn’t Peridot trying to win over a stubborn holdout, it’s a spacy ruby who ignores the venom. But at the same time, Lapis is the only protester in the Navy Parade, and her clash with Steven’s goal of bringing in a new friend makes her a huge bummer. 
Which is why I love this episode’s lesson so much: that it’s sometimes okay to be a huge bummer.
It’s okay because everyone’s going through the world at their own pace, and whether you’re clinically depressed, a survivor of trauma, or you’re just plain sad, it doesn’t make you less worthy than folks in a happier mood. Lapis attempts patience and understanding despite her annoyance, and only snaps when Navy’s attitude turns sickly sweet; feelings of inferiority are hard to work through, but it doesn’t make it okay to be a jerk the whole time. Even after the outburst, Lapis is quick to reassure Navy, acknowledging that it’s an internal problem and apologizing. She wants to like the newcomer, but as soon as she senses the forced perkiness it’s hard for her not to notice that something’s off.
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A good twist is something that makes you rethink the plot, but a great twist does this duty while being enjoyable as a plot point on its own merits. The execution of Navy’s betrayal is marvelous, even as it becomes more and more obvious that it’s coming. After spending the whole episode geeking out about Earth stuff, Navy not-so-subtly suggests that she wants to go back to her ship. Steven not only falls for it, but is down to press a huge button without asking follow-up questions; it may seem inconsistent with his growing maturity, but it makes sense that an excitable kid is lost in the joy of making a new friend. The stranger area for me is his exclamation that the Crystal Gems “finally” have a pilot, as if Pearl hasn’t been successfully navigating spaceships this whole time, but again, he’s caught up in the moment.
The twist-within-a-twist is that while Navy has been plotting against our heroes this whole time, her demeanor isn’t part of the act. Yi's transition from earnest giddiness on land versus manic giddiness post-betrayal is worth the price of admission, especially as she merrily explains that she opted not to just steal the ship because she wanted to watch the Crystal Gems suffer. 
And of course, this brings about Lapis’s triumphant laughter at being proven right. Jennifer Paz is awesome throughout the episode, restraining herself when necessary for big bursts of energy to hit home, and it culminates in the sheer joy that comes from righteous vindication. We could’ve gotten a somber moment of Steven’s anguish at being tricked, similar to what we got after Peridot’s duplicity in Message Received, but Lapis allows us a sense of relief despite things going horribly. 
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In an episode featuring a character as unsubtle as Navy (being tricky doesn’t stop her from being loud and hammy), I love the quieter story we get from Garnet. We only get a nudge that Navy’s story appeals to Ruby and Sapphire, but we don’t need more than that, so I’m glad we don’t get more. Yes, it would be fun to see Ruby hanging out with Navy, but the episode’s focus is elsewhere and we don’t indulge in fanservice that would take away from the plot. The two balloons Garnet brings at the end are color-coded for convenience, so we don’t need anyone to tell us that the optimistic red message is Ruby’s hopes and the apologetic blue message is Sapphire’s realism. It’s not a novel observation that Steven Universe respects the audience enough to not hold our hands, but it’s still appreciated.
(Also appreciated is a soft moment of Garnet bonding with Steven independent of the plot as they make wishes; Steven may be growing up fast, but he’s still allowed to be a kid sometimes instead of spending every episode in teen angst mode.)
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In terms of criticisms, I’m a little torn about the pacing: Room for Ruby meanders a bit in that second act, even though I understand its purpose. Lapis needs to have her tolerance for Navy strained to a breaking point so she’s not throwing a tantrum out of nowhere, so we need multiple examples of frustrating glee. But it does get a little boring on rewatch to have the point driven home again and again that Navy is a perfect little angel, even if it’s all building up to the twist that she’s anything but.
Still, I can’t help but enjoy the nostalgia this structure provides, because major plot points aside, the episode fits right in with classic Season 1. We get a simple story that primes us for an obvious conclusion. Steven will find an unusual solution in his cheeseburger backpack. Steven will learn patience when Pearl takes a while to reform. Steven’s beach party with the Gems and the Pizzas will teach the Gems to respect civilians more. Lapis will grow to accept Navy’s differences. But instead, Steven’s improvisation only goes so far, and he’s impatient again as soon as Pearl returns, and the Gems still don’t care about Fish Stew Pizza, and Lapis’s negative outlook was correct. Steven Universe first made its mark by toying with the conventions of episodes with straightforward morals, and it’s nice to see that legacy continue so late in the series. 
The implications of Navy’s actions are soon made clear, as the loss of the Crystal Gems’ only means of space travel (stolen from the very barn where Steven, Greg, and Pearl first experimented with space travel!) makes Steven’s imminent sacrifice that much weightier. But before that shoe drops, we can enjoy one last glimpse of our favorite little ruby.
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(I’m kidding of course, our Ruby is the best ruby.)
We’re the one, we’re the ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!
Charlyne Yi hamming it up and Lapis’s grouchiness paying off? What’s not to love?
Top Twenty
Steven and the Stevens
Hit the Diamond
Mirror Gem
Lion 3: Straight to Video
Alone Together
Last One Out of Beach City
The Return
Jailbreak
The Answer
Mindful Education
Sworn to the Sword
Rose’s Scabbard
Earthlings
Mr. Greg
Coach Steven
Giant Woman
Beach City Drift
Winter Forecast
Bismuth
Steven’s Dream
Love ‘em
Laser Light Cannon
Bubble Buddies
Tiger Millionaire
Lion 2: The Movie
Rose’s Room
An Indirect Kiss
Ocean Gem
Space Race
Garnet’s Universe
Warp Tour
The Test
Future Vision
On the Run
Maximum Capacity
Marble Madness
Political Power
Full Disclosure
Joy Ride
Keeping It Together
We Need to Talk
Chille Tid
Cry for Help
Keystone Motel
Catch and Release
When It Rains
Back to the Barn
Steven’s Birthday
It Could’ve Been Great
Message Received
Log Date 7 15 2
Same Old World
The New Lars
Monster Reunion
Alone at Sea
Crack the Whip
Beta
Back to the Moon
Kindergarten Kid
Buddy’s Book
Gem Harvest
Three Gems and a Baby
That Will Be All
The New Crystal Gems
Storm in the Room
Room for Ruby
Like ‘em
Gem Glow
Frybo
Arcade Mania
So Many Birthdays
Lars and the Cool Kids
Onion Trade
Steven the Sword Fighter
Beach Party
Monster Buddies
Keep Beach City Weird
Watermelon Steven
The Message
Open Book
Story for Steven
Shirt Club
Love Letters
Reformed
Rising Tides, Crashing Tides
Onion Friend
Historical Friction
Friend Ship
Nightmare Hospital
Too Far
Barn Mates
Steven Floats
Drop Beat Dad
Too Short to Ride
Restaurant Wars
Kiki’s Pizza Delivery Service
Greg the Babysitter
Gem Hunt
Steven vs. Amethyst
Bubbled
Adventures in Light Distortion
Gem Heist
The Zoo
Rocknaldo
Enh
Cheeseburger Backpack
Together Breakfast
Cat Fingers
Serious Steven
Steven’s Lion
Joking Victim
Secret Team
Say Uncle
Super Watermelon Island
Gem Drill
Know Your Fusion
Future Boy Zoltron
Tiger Philanthropist
No Thanks!
     6. Horror Club      5. Fusion Cuisine      4. House Guest      3. Onion Gang      2. Sadie’s Song      1. Island Adventure
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incorrect-vrains-quotes · 6 years ago
Note
What if the Ignis developed a Mother Complex towards Kusanagi (Shoichi)?Could be a virus or a glitch or just some plain misunderstanding of their own “self-perception/self-development” - Or it could be a concussion - Whatever (Everyone’s reactions?)
the first time I read this ask, my brain shut down after the very first line and it took me legit 2 hours to ready myself for the rest of it and despite the rather wild opening, the rest of it was quite tame. 
So my thought process is, quite long and roundabout so bear with me. So first, let’s lay the groundwork which immediately connects to the topic at hand. I posit that Kusanagi Shoichi is just a magnet for the found family trope. Something about him intrinsically attracts wayward teens who are looking for, like, a big brother figure or something. Not even Aoi would be immune to his brotherly pheromones. Thus, with this benign strength, it could be possible that Kusanagi has the potential to exert it over the Ignises.
In fact, I’ll argue that he already has. After all, the design parallels between him and Bohman and between Jin and Haru have been hot topic for quite some time. It makes sense: Jin created Lightning and Lightning in turn designed the 9000 Brothers. And based on what we’ve been given, Shoichi and Jin clearly had a great brother-brother relationship prior to the Incident which brings me to my next point. 
I believe that Jin feels betrayed that Shoichi was unable to save him from the Incident. Miyu had Aoi and Yusaku had Ryoken but Jin didn’t feel like he had Shoichi. Thus, this fed into how Lightning was created as an Ignis. After all, Lightning clearly took inspiration from the Kusanagi Brothers when he created Bohman and Haru; not to mention, we see this in his sort of intrinsic character values. 
If my belief is true, then if Jin felt betrayed by Shoichi being unable to save him, then that soured the make-up that Lightning was given, as compared to say Aqua or Ai in the previous cases of Miyu and Yusaku respectively. Thus, Lightning became who he is today: self-reliant and unable to truly form positive bonds with others because that’s what Jin taught him in his familial grief. 
On an unrelated tangent, but based on dialogue that Shoichi gave in the last episode, it seems possible that he was tasked with babysitting or playing with Jin on the day he was kidnapped and some sort of negligence, on his behalf, caused Jin to be stolen away. I feel that including this will help contextualise the previous paragraph further to truly embed the message Jin gave Lightning through the Incident.
Now, to reconnect it to the possibility of the Ignises being susceptible to Kusanagi Shoichi’s found family magnetism. So, if Jin taught Lightning family values based on the hurt he felt over Shoichi being unable to save him, or look after him, then its highly likely that Lightning has some sort of coding strand, in his genome possibly, which makes him the most likely out of the Ignises to feel some sort of ‘positive warmth’ towards Kusanagi Shoichi. After all, I think Jin did cling to the positive memories he had of his brother that he formed prior to the Incident, but they were twisted by the hurt that he felt due to the Incident or the immediate lead-up to the Incident when he was kidnapped.
Ideally, this would mean that, if Lightning was to be redeemed or defanged, that could mean a stable Kusanagi Brothers-Light Ignis household which is what I personally want. After all, Lightning could be given the opportunity to explore how he perceives the family structure from within it and that could give us good Lightning-HalMan Brothers development which could be excellent.
Which does not directly lead to the next point which is, if Lightning - the indisputable and cold leader - of the Ignises, has the potential to pack bond with Kusanagi Shoichi and his familial pheromones, what of the other Ignises?
Well, it does get a touch tricky. After all, whilst Shoichi has the canonically acknowledged (thank you Takeru for pointing out the bond between Shoichi and Yusaku as being like family or even possibly something stronger) ability to attract and soothe wayward teens hankering for familial connection they are otherwise starved for, he didn’t know the LI Kids (with exception of Jin, of course) prior to the Incident. Furthermore, based on what we’ve seen, Jin was the only LI Kid who had a sibling; Takeru and Miyu both seem to be only children, Yusaku doesn’t even remember his family at all, Spectre has no fondness for the other orphanage children (or anyone at all), and we can only speculate about Windy’s Kid but at the moment, a safe bet would be to assign him as an only child as well. Therefore, the resulting Fire, Water, Dark, Earth, and Wind Ignises likely aren’t inclined toward the sibling structure like Lightning was, as we’ve seen again through Bohman and Haru’s relationship. So, let’s analyse the present.
Shoichi has interacted with Ai and Flame the most. He hasn’t met Aqua in person yet, but he probably feels affable towards her but for the sake of this part of my response, we’ll focus on Ai and Flame (and even then, mostly the former). But, for convenience’s sake, we’ll talk about the latter first as it will be more concise. Flame and Shoichi have had little on-screen time together. Of it, it was amicable. Mostly, Shoichi would interact with Takeru and Takeru seems to genuinely like and look up to Shoichi. No doubt feeling the effects of Shoichi’s big brother magnetism. So, through that, Flame has a positive relationship with Shoichi, but not necessarily one which has roots in some sort of familial complex. Especially since Takeru’s familal troubles seem to be disagreeing with his grandparents and mourning the loss of his parents after their sudden demise. Contrast directly with Ai.
Ai and Shoichi are best buds. I feel that they jibed and got along super well in Season One, before Yusaku was able to open his heart to Ai abit more. Before that, Ai and Shoichi had great banter (the binary days and Yusaku can’t talk to girls jokes spring to mind first) and I think that makes perfect sense. Yusaku, who’s memories presumably rapidly decomposed on him during the Incident, was likely hoping that there was someone nice and jovial looking out for him, to contrast his shyer personality. Someone like Shoichi, perhaps, to contrast The Voice who had helped inspired him and turned him unto his Three Reasons Why. So, it is possible that Ai, similar to Lightning, has something with his code which predisposes him to connect in overly familiar ways with people and is therefore, susceptible to Kusanagi’s powerful big brother energy.
With the remaining Ignises - Aqua, Earth, and Windy - things get a bit more tricky. But, we’ll start with Aqua as she is the most straightforward of our remaining three. It is no secret that Aqua is the mother hen of the Ignises and admittedly, I enjoy characterising Kusanagi as being a professional herder of cats when it comes to Yusaku’s group because I find it charming and endearing, though not necessarily rooted in canon. Unlike with Aqua and her very mothering tendencies (I still think we were robbed of a brilliant red herring if Spectre had been Aqua’s Origin but I digress). Now, Aqua and Shoichi - as far as I recall - have not had voice lines together; they haven’t interacted, even over the line. Unsurprising given that Aoi is more closely entwined with Akira and Ema and their group and Aoi is still unaware of Playmaker & Soulburner’s true identities and of the Hot Dog Truck HQ. So, this next part is pure conjecture but Aqua would absolutely be susceptible to Kusanagi Shoichi’s found family magnetism and she would probably adore how he looks after the boys. 
To substantiate this claim, Aqua was partially modelled on Miyu’s perception of Aoi. And, whilst the girls didn’t talk about Akira on-screen and whilst Miyu didn’t meet Akira on-screen, it does seem plausible that Miyu is aware of Akira’s existence and how he factors into Aoi. So, similar to how Jin would have imprinted memories and ideas of Shoichi onto Lightning, Miyu could have done something similar to Aqua, teaching her of familial structures unlike her own. Especially since Miyu seems to come from a one-child family.
Now, moving on from Aqua, let’s go to Earth. Earth is quite unique in that he had the Origin who actively enjoyed the Experiment and actively reviles his life prior to it. He is also, as far as we know, the only Ignis whose Origin’s family did not love him and the only family Spectre did love was his protective mother tree. Now, the relationship between Earth and Spectre is bizarre to say the least given the fact that they are on opposite sides of the Human-Ignis warfare, never met, and yet Spectre mourned his passing regardless. So, it is difficult to identify what sort of ideas or memories that Spectre may have shared or taught Earth, especially since, unlike say Miyu and Aqua or Takeru and Flame, their relationship isn’t quite one to one or near it. So, this is speculation but, Earth probably would have the inclination towards familial relationships and probably has one of the stronger inclinations towards it because Spectre clearly craves that kind of connection.
It is no secret that if any Vrains character was going to have a mother complex, it would be Spectre (with, in my opinion, Dojun Kengo/Blood Shepherd in a rather distant second position). Spectre craves mother’s love very strongly and his only regret during the Incident was the fact that he couldn’t share all the fun he was having with his dear mother tree. This imprinted quite strongly on Earth, as evidenced by his duels with Playmaker and Onizuka wherein he uses a tree as his platform to duel. So, this strong bond for connections would absolutely cause Earth to adore Kusanagi Shoichi.
Now, to conclude the examination round with Windy. With Windy’s Origin’s status still hidden from us, save for his appearance and even then… there is speculation, it is impossible to make grounded claims. So, i’m not even going to bother save for reiterating it seems to be a safe bet to say that Windy’s Kid is an only child. So that’s that, even if its a cop out but what do we do with this information? 
Well, to long didn’t read, this was the perfect - if a little bizarre - case study to examine the Origin-Ignis relationships through and to long didn’t read, all the Ignises have some sort of proclivity towards enjoying familal pack bonding and Kusanagi Shoichi is just too powerful a big brother, but I couldn’t entwine the “mother complex” thing because I don’t perceive as being like ducklings who see anything go “yep, that’s my mum” because Shoichi has brother energy. Uncle energy if you stretch it. But thank you for reading!
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