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ghouldtime · 8 months ago

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i usually don’t message anyone or anything but i just wanted to say i love your characterizations of konig, ghost, and soap very much. the love and appreciation you have for these characters really come through in your writing.

the cod fandom is full of talented writers but the majority of them write smut. it gets tiring scrolling through the tag and just seeing porn when i actually just wanna see… ppl who enjoy the characters outside of sex appeal, yk? so your blog, truly and genuinely, is a breath of fresh air.

that’s not even mentioning the ppl who write them as abusive or use them to fulfill certain fantasies. i mean i don’t kink shame ofc, but idk sometimes ppl write them in extremely degrading ways that do a disservice to their character and it bugs me a little. plus all the “innocent bimbo reader” rhetoric, idk it gets tiring.

anyway, sorry for the yap session, but i did mean everything i said genuinely !!

💚💚💚💚 Salutations anon! You really don't know how much I appreciate hearing this. Seriously, messages like this give me motivation to keep writing and to stay active on here. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU from the very depths of my heart. You've all been so so incredibly kind, sweet, and encouraging 😭 I don't know what I've done to deserve this but it's appreciated and you all are absolutely awesome. This has made my YEAR, thank you for taking time out of your day to send my silly self a message 💚💚💚💚💚

I'm so so happy my characterizations have hit the mark for some people and that I'm (hopefully) doing them some justice! I'm always worried about that because characterization matters heavily to me and I want to respect their characters and how much they mean to me and other people through it EVEN IF THE WRITERS OF THE LAST MODERN WARFARE DON'T KNOW WHAT A PROPER STORY LINE IS AND KILLED SOAP WHICH I'M NOT FORGETTING, IM NOT FORGIVING, AND IM CERTAIN NOT LIVE LAUGH LOVING WITH IT. I'm refusing to accept he's dead, no matter what they say

I love the boys all so much. They all have such interesting things about them and have a lot more dynamic to them than people think and I just want to represent them right, especially lesser appreciated characters (haven't actually really written for them yet but Keegan, Logan, Hesh, Sandman, Roach, Nikto, Krueger - legit I love them, anyone feel free to send asks or scenarios you'd like I WILL write them. Legit, y'all, you can send me asks about certain characters even if there isn't much on them. I WILL do my research and I WILL write to the best of my ability)

Oh there's many talented writers in the COD Fandom, there really are. I can't say I really know any personally seeing as I never really interact with other blogs but I've seen some reallly really nice fics with so much thought put in them. But equally, there's a lot of just... smut. Not even well written smut, I'm sorry, but a lot of it is just really, really poorly written. I'm all for do what you want, write whatever makes you happy. Freedom of speech! If it makes you happy, cool! But I'm also going to cringe cause a lot of it is... yeah, yikes

Not trying to be the smut police and say every detail must be accounted for and everyone should follow it in a certain way but plz basic anatomy 101, basic prep 101, no guy gal or enby pal will appreciate it if you just shove it in to anywhere dry and I've seen a loooot of that and other things that just hurt?????

I get it, people learn by reading/writing, but this is literally just a single search away. And common sense. There's also a lot of practices being unsafely represented (like fifty shades of gray level) and uh it's not on purpose, it's not meant to be dubious, but it just is written as that. PLEEEEASE please please do some research, the internet is right there

But I felt the same way. Like bless whatever y'all want to write, no shame and NO shade to writing smut. I'll probably eventually do it myself again in the future (undecided on that but it'd likely be a side blog if I do and would never be a main focus, I prefer story over smut action. Once again, no shade and no shame to those who don't, to each their own!). Never ever going to full on NSFW mode or only writing that, I'm always always always going to prioritize writing the characters first and trying to get more stories out there about them :D

But I got tired of opening it and all I see is just... smut, smut, more smut, extremely dubious content x 50. And maybe a sprinkle of normal things or fluff here and there. I just don't look in the tags honestly anymore, because so many people just don't properly tag it or give 0 warning at all, not even under a read more, just BAM, unavoidable unless you flat out don't look at the tags at all

There's more to the characters than just being attractive 😭and I love exploring those aspects of them and trying to figure out why they are the way they are

Also I'm ALWAYS going to have an issue with people who fetishize horrible things. When you're actively fantasizing and writing about someone abusing someone else, like flat out abuse, and being incredibly toxic and terrible to someone - just, please talk to a therapist. That's not social commentary, that's not a proper portrayal of real, HORRIBLE things that affect many people and have very real repercussions - that's perpetuating the negative narrative around a lot of struggles and setting it back by instead turning it into something that's treated as attractive. I really fully can elaborate on this and have a whole rant - but it's not cute and it's NEVER cool to fetishize actual, awful awful things that happen to people. Dead dove doesn't excuse you from judgement - especially when it's not even acknowledged. You're just saying you know what you write is probably morally reprehensible. Hey, I'm going to reprehend and won't respect you at all when you write awful things just cause and get off on it. Think people forget that. Dead dove is a descriptor and doesn't excuse you or make you instantly free from judgement or mean you're not doing something problematic/disgusting. It's just saying you know it is, that's about it.

I don't get why people do that when it's clear they have no idea what they're talking about. I've seen that a lot with the bully! Things. Like... wow, clearly some of you WEREN'T bullied and you're writing about it and it shows because if you were, hey, you know how fucking awful that shit is and how it leaves life long effects. Not saying this applies to all but there's a lot I see like that where it's just ".... wow, okay, so you don't have any idea what you're talking about, cool."

AND YEAH the mischaracterization really does do a great disservice where it's clear they're just after the characters for their physique. They just warp them so bad it's like "Are we talking about the same character?" . In AUs you get to explore that and can shape them to your wants, that's your choice! Highly recommend AU's, it allows so much freedom.

But when it's like.... regular? And it's just no where close and they're doing a 180 in how they actually are (like having Ghost flirt with strangers and be big scary daddy dom im sorry he's not at allllll) I don't get it and it's clear you really aren't writing about or for the character - at that point, plz, make your own characters. Just make your own OCs, it's great! And you can make them HOWEVER you want instead of just ignoring a character's characterization to make them fit what you want. And guess what? It's your character so you can TRULY do what you want and have them the way that you want instead of bending characters to fit a box that they weren't made for

I'm not saying you HAVE to write a character the same as me or in a specific way, but when it's a character with an established personality/backstory, the least you can do is follow that outside of AU's if you're writing for them. That's... the whole point of writing that character - I don't get why you'd write for them specifically if you're literally going to ignore everything about them

SPEAKING OF THE INNOCENT BIMBO THING, I'm also really not a fan. Once again, if that makes you happy to write or read, cool! I just am NOOOOT a fan. Why does the reader always have to be so small and so delicate and so pure/innocent? Why does the reader have to be just so UWU coded? Why are they always like "oh you're so little and small :( and just don't know any better" . It's either that or they're John fucking Wick with little in between. Pleeeease it hurts my soul

Its why I try to genuinely write a neutral geared reader with reactions that will likely fit a lot of people! I'm always taken out of a story's immersiveness when it mentions something like like your hair length or how uwu small you are in comparison. Give me just... average sensible reader. Give me reader who has realistic human reactions. Give me reader who isn't perfect, give me a reader who isn't magically special or different. Give me a reader who is just doing their best, who is THEMSELVES, with no intent otherwise. I love those fanfics so so much instead of trying to feel like I have to be something I'm not to get myself in the mindset to read some pieces NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR YAPPING. IM ALWAYS WANTING TO TALK IM ALWAYS AROUND 💚💚💚💚THANK YOU FOR THE MESSAGE IT MAKES MY HEART WARM AND MAKES ME SO SO HAPPY

#ghouldtimetalks #cod fandom rant #rant #vent #going a little insane in the membrane #insane in the brain #call of duty #cod

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miss-revy-1412 · 4 months ago

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A letter to Tumblr fans of 7 Brothers

I'm gonna manifest Queen Megaris in me to actually read to the filth to some of you people regarding 7 Brothers. You may see I'm going all out that I'm about to say.

You know it's really toxic and pathetic when fans are forced by some people here to write a long arse essay to explain that : "Hey I may not romance Grant but, I'm not racist."

Few days ago, I read a blog done by someone and I felt really sad and uncomfortable for the user (I'm not taking name to save her privacy) imagine the fandom putting you in such a position where you have to explain yourself why you don't like certain characters. No, it's not racism if you don't romance Grant. Grant lacks an arc or something going on with him.

Let me explain it to you: Tristan , Lillian and Chloe are romance options yet they got some arc going on with them: hacking the rich guys for ending capitalism is Tristan's arc, fighting against addiction and recovering her true self again is Lillian's. Trying to break off from her toxic dad, spying and put the criminals to jail is Chloe's arc but, What about Grant? He doesn't even have a proper arc nor his tensions with dad is ever noticed which itself is saddening. I romance all these people and heck it's really sad what is going with Grant even the new branch has issues and drama given his parents are literally involved in smuggling and corporate capitalism.

Same applies to Chloe and Lililan. I haven't seen any rude comments or mockery for them but, no these two are actually good branch and just because, people aren't romancing them doesn't make the fans as homophobic nor racist respectively. This fandom has majority of girls who are straight, it just people want to aggresively use these things rather than addressing the real flaws and issues with the story. Not everyone will love the cup of tea that you are having!!!

Let fans love their characters please, like stop being such a moodkill or toxic. This is FICTIONAL it's not so serious.

Moving on : we wanna just f*ck white men, we don't give a f about Langley's story. Oh look they forced her to do this, we are begging for James, shaming the fans. This is peak toxic behaviour.

No, there are people who didn't played 7 Brothers because the plot didn't clicked to them, the FBI kidnapping thing was seen to be absurd especially a barely legal girl investigating her seniors not many people liked that aspect and that was the highlight for not getting into this story secondly while, the plot was called 7 Brothers people thought we would sleep around with every guy or something but it didn't sure this part might be a nitpicking but, honestly because of people criticising some aspects besides the LI made please for once do look at from others view too rather than putting these victimhood mentality.

Langley improved her story by 3rd and 4th update respectively. We stared having more interaction with other brothers and people who weren't LI. I mean Simon should be a Li Only came into debate when we started getting more scenes with him and all (Hypocrisy)

Now, moving on to the biggest elephant of this room. Jesus Christ!!! Can I understand why there was so massed up pent up aggression the very day Langley announced back in September that James' will be a fling.

I swear so much attention and confessions were bought who would romance this dude, he's so sh*t and all. I understand your confessions but, some of these literally forgot we have Mehmed, Amrit, Zain, Deigo and Masked Man as love interests who actually were killers (not Zain) , potential r*posts and even the hell were sleeping with MC whom they would qualify to be their uncles, cousins? You people don't have seen this? Not ya all seeing James worse than Amrit , Mehmed or Deigo

James literally said one freaking scene at stables also, can I ask for snippets where he shows r*cism openly or call certain Jaynies as by racist tags, or scenes where he humiliates Logan and Grant or maybe wearing an offensive outfit or putting a theme at Halloween to target certain people of race?

Also no, I don't believe in I can fix him mentality. He can look for a therapist rather than asking me to do so. Never I asked for that

He's a classist asshole that's the thing I see. He atleast didn't try to r*pe Jaynie (Mehmed) nor undressed her while unconsciously (Amrit) or decided to go trying to murder Ray. That whole estate thing was his dick parent's doing and he tried to take fun of this sufferings because he's an asshole

but, I pray for you haters that you get a scene to kill him off and even get satisfaction and all for that. Killing him with an axe , Poisoning him or pushing him from Bahamas Cliff or even Dr*gging him to death , etc etc and I'm pretty much sure Langley will deliver that!

Imagine getting blocked because, saying: "They will make a hot/interesting/ dynamic couple." That's just so be fr. I would hear everyone's fantasy rather than being a d*ck because, freedom of speech and expression is a basic thing for all.

Also white cis man 💀 ya all would really take it if we go call other POC guys as Greg and Vincent like this? No that be racism. They got a name you know, etc etc. Seriously give them a nickname God or just call them by name labelling them for skin colour is a hypocrite behaviour if you believe racism and colorism is wrong.

7 Brothers is literally a story about from Rags to riches either you wanna do it unfairly or on your own merit or wanna use the money for humanitarian goals (this is the theme)

Also, we are here for the romance and drama. The drama is about exploitation of the hard working citizens by the rich people. It's about classism not politics. If It was then this book would had been called : "Vying for Whitehouse" instead.

Also, this is romance club a game that sells you romance and love interest . No one here begs. It's a customer's request and RC can do where money talks. Could be a slap at the wrist but, if RC sees a certain character bringing them fans, money and all they can do that. Langley was never forced.

There are scenes where James follows Alexandre's path and even Jaynie saying in "I" not certain that I like James, her trying to change her wardrobe in Episode 5 to look classy after that James remarks. Like why do you care what that asshole says??? Alexandre was a scumbag too and his first s*x scene also had no strings attached thing .

Some of you also want XYZ character to be a LI yet, you go mock others for doing that (hypocrisy!!). Mocking someone for loving James or even trying to silence them isn't very liberal thing to do. People were scared? Hello. please learn to take other people's liking rather than blocking them off or just mocking behind their back.

Finally, coming to the conclusion no, we don't want bastards like him as a lover in real life. This is ficition also stop wasting your time hating on others or Fictional pixelated character they won't make a change to society or to others. Go out and fight for social justice and wrongs in the society.

Yours unruly,

MRZ

#rc 7 brothers #romance club #rc james #rc grant #romanceclub #rc 7b #7 brothers

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honey-minded-hivemind · 10 months ago

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sorry for not interacting, I have no excuse, I forgot tumblr existed-

the creator reader sounds awesome, like sagau but your own, like imagine if reader was a YouTuber who made commentary and stuff and decided to go over X-men,how would they feel about that?

It's fine, @crowwithguns ! You don't have to reply or look if you don't want to! Just check in whenever you want!

If Reader was a YouTuber or MeeTuber or WeeTuber or whatever their world's version is, i imagine they'd be brutal yet sweet when mentioning the characters, especially if they have favorites. Examples being:

Mentioning Scott: "Laser light show going on here, but has a heart of gold. He's such a good guy, I mean, look at his little face! Who could stay mad at him?!"

Mentioning Rogue (plus Mystique): "Give this girl therapy! Let her have a boyfriend or girlfriend or someone! And Raven, start being a mom! Stop tossing people off of cliffs! Stop traumatizing this child and let her have happiness!"

Mentioning Logan: "Yes, YES! You are good at this parenting thing, for being born in the 1800s! I wish you were my dad, seriously, you probably are everyone's choice. Good job, little angry Canadian guy!"

Mentioning Charles Xavier: "Charles! Be a parent a bit more! You need to let them be kids! Take your adopted herd of teens to the beach! Or to Disney! You better be doing that! See, this is why you need to take a parenting class! Someone get this man a parenting book!"

Mentioning Magneto: "... I want to kick your *ss so hard right now... Why would you do ThAT TO YOUR CHILDREN?! CHARLES, WHERE ARE YOU?! MENTALLY SMACK SOKE SENSE INTO YOUR BOYFRIEND!"

Mentioning Hank: "He is perfect just the way he is and is a 10/10 on being a parent, good job, Hank, you are doing great🙂"

Mentioning Sabretooth (plus Logan): "... I really, really like you, and I don't know why... Why do you and Logan always fight when you see each other though? Seriously? Each and every time. Does it ever get boring? Is he your brother? Your friend? Your son? You two need to talk it out for once! And knowing the both of you, it will turn into a bloody fight in the snow and end with, yet again, another person being tossed off a cliff... Sweet pumpkin pie, why do I... Seriously, how do I like you two?"

Reader, mentioning the show (can be X-Men Evo or a fanon version of X-Men AU): "These guys have gotten me through some rough times. Even if they fight and argue, I love how they're a family. It's really nice to see that... Man, it's been, what, how long since I saw this show/made this au/read this book/helped create this universe... It was, and always will have, a place in my heart. And my mind. Heh... I hope they enjoy themselves. It's quite the adventure~!"

All of the X-Men characters: blushing, mumbling a little, then wondering if they just heard the Creator compliment them and say they loved them...

All of them when a long time of Reader not visiting (dreaming) has passed: Xavier, do something! They haven't responded to us! Where are they? We want them back!😖😣😫

Xavier: ... Have I ever mentioned my idea to bring them here? Where they can be our friend/child/student/sibling/loved one?

Everyone else: We're worried you even thought of that, but yes, please, continue-

#honeycomb thoughts #platonic yandere marvel #yandere platonic marvel #platonic yandere xmen #yandere x-men #platonic yandere marvel x reader #platonic yandere xmen evolution #platonic yandere xmen evolution au #platonic yandere xmen: the animated series #platonic yandere xmen 97 #platonic yandere xmen anime #platonic yandere xmen au #⛈cult of the first mutant🧿 au

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go-go-devil · 6 months ago

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top 5 soulsborne NPCs... OTHER than patches. and top 5 games you hope to play next year!

Honestly I can't answer the second one since my autism is too unpredictable with when it allows me to actually sit down and play a new game, but I've got PLENTY of soulsborne npcs I'd love to gush about (besides the legend himself) so let's get to it!

Solaire:

May as well get the obvious out of the way lol. There's honestly SO MUCH going on with Solaire's character and motivations that goes far beyond the reasons he's usually so beloved. Yes, he's a genuine ray of sunshine willing to go out of his way to help us in such a desolate, cruel world, has a extremely pleasing/memorable design + wonderful voice acting, and is canonically bisexual. Obviously there's a lot to love from all of his surface level interactions.

...But he's also far more complex than simply being a nice person! He's a regular human devoting himself to an impossible mission solely for his own sake, and his doubts and desperation over it hits me so hard, especially in his regular ending T_T. I always found this quest to find his sun to be a metaphor for self-discovery as a means of fighting back against depression. I think Solaire knows fully well how terrible this dying world has become and has possibly even lived a bad life considering how happy he was to become undead and travel to Lordran, using his quest as a means of staving off the dread in his soul before it turns toward any suicidal inclinations.

No I'm not being edgy. I truly think all of this is intentional to his character, much like how I think the entirety of DS1's view on hollowing is a metaphor for depression and/or barring oneself from the world vs. actively opening up to it. That's why it's so important to support our grossly incandescent friend and Praise the Sun! ☀️

Griggs & Laurentius:

Decided to put them together since they're both very similar characters in my eyes.

I've found (on this site at least) that these two are often overlooked compared to most other DS1 characters, and honestly that's a damn shame since they've got so much to offer outside of their very useful magic teachings. For starters they're both sad, pathetic men who immediately love you for saving them from their own embarrassing predicaments which I think more games need for their male npcs lol. In all seriousness though, I always felt the game did a great job giving them so much character in each of their interactions; both in how close they grow to you and in how much they care about their respective crafts of magic. The pair also have similarly sad stories regarding what they lack, with Griggs's incredibly low sense of self-worth when he compares himself to Logan and Laurentius having always been an outcast even in his own community.

What I'm saying is that they're both much deeper (and also more tragic) characters than I feel they're given credit for, and I wish the rest of fandom would talk more about them.

Mephistopheles:

Sometimes a character doesn't have to be super deep for me to love them. Sometimes they can simply be an incredibly evil woman with a deep voice and great design who manipulates you until finally betraying you when you least expect it. 🐍⚜️🖤

With Mephistopheles I can actually understand why not too many soulsborne fans talk about her since she's probably the most obscure character in the entirety of Demon's Souls: one who requires you to have a pure black character tendency (which requires you killing non-hostile npcs to get) in order to even see her. As of now I haven't had the guts to try her questline yet, but I do plan on it trying it for my next DeS playthrough because holy hell is she hot- uh, I mean really a interesting character! Even though I said earlier I don't think she's as deep as several other npcs in the game, she's still a character with a lot of juicy lore surrounding the organization she runs and her choice of manipulating people into killing her targets instead of getting her hands dirty herself.

Also I fucking hate her Remake design oh my god it's so fucking bad I just wanna throw up everywhere what the fuck were they thinking T_T

Lucatiel:

My favorite character from DS2 (with Straid and Ornifex following very close behind), and of course she's basically just that game's Solaire equivalent with a gender bending design. My tastes are so predictable lol.

Besides her INCREDIBLE design and amazing voice acting, I feel out of all the npcs she does the best job at conveying this game's theme of connecting hollowing to identity. She comes into this land with so little regard for herself and already suffering early memory loss from the slow hollowing she's going through, and but unlike the other npcs (who are actually affected by the curse in any way) we have the chance to save her through our cooperation and going out of our way to engage with and get to know her. In this sense I see her as the reverse of Solaire's quest and honestly wish future soulsborne characters played around with the series' character tropes as well as she did.

Also she's trans. It's canon and I accept no criticism for saying this ;-)

Greirat:

I haven't finished DS3 yet but oh my soul do I love this little thieving rat man so much <3<3<3

I'm almost too afraid to say more yet since I haven't finished his questline and thus technically haven't fully absorbed him as a character yet. So far though he's done so much to endear me to him! His questline with the blue tearstone ring and overall connection to the Undead Settlement gets me soooooo emotional, as does his withered voice and charming demeanor despite all the horrors he's had inflicted on him and his few loved ones.

And of course that's not even getting into how a certain other npc interacts with him during his questline, but I cannot say any more since you specified not to mention him this time despite how much it PAINS me not to. All I'll say is that I am beyond disappointed in most of this fandom for sleeping on these two characters' relationship with each other -_-

#asks #dark souls #demon's souls #solaire of astora #griggs of vinheim #laurentius of the great swamp #mephistopheles #lucatiel of mirrah #greirat of the undead settlement #I didn't include bloodborne characters since I haven't played that game yet #hope this infodump was worth the hour it took me to get all my thoughts down in a coherent manner ✨

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respondedinkind · 1 year ago

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Okay, okay, so... the new year isn't here yet, but 2023 is coming to an end very soon and I have planned to make a post - so here it is.

What this post is about? You!

I just want to be here and say thank you to everyone who has joined me here on my blog, even though I haven't been around for long. I am insanely grateful for each and every single one of you being here, for all the good memories you allowed me to make, and that so many of you welcomed me - and my muse - with open arms. I am so happy that you gave - and still give - me opportunities to explore my own writing and my muse's behaviors, and I just cannot stop saying it enough: THANK YOU!

I met some incredible people over the last months - some of which are people that I have RPed with before and where I was oh-so-excited to have them met again, after all these years of me having been separated from my Khan-muse because of fandom-changes, interest-changes, whatnot; For those of you who don't know, I first started to write Khan in 2012, BEFORE Star Trek into Darkness even aired, solely based on speculations and a teaser trailer lol. It wasn't very serious, but then definitely developed into what is my most-written muse after the movie finally came out and Khan just invaded my brain like some kind of parasite.

Since then, I have made a few blogs, kept writing Khan for a couple of years, then went on hiatus - remade, revamped, wrote for a few more years, disappeared... and now here I am again, with an AU-Version I was very, very scared to just put out here but now I am so, so glad I did. Thank you all for allowing me to write it, and yeah, I'm repeating myself, but... the opportunies I got and still get? So wonderful. Thank you so much for giving my Khan a chance.

Besides that, I also expanded my horizon a little and made two more blogs: One is on a little hiatus right now, while I am very active on the other thanks to some wonderful human beings who basically set my love for that character into flames. I hope that, and I mean that with the utmost sincerety, my choice of 'second and especially third muse' is not taken as a will to replace anything or anyone, but rather me being so immensely starstruck by other writers that have given me such a great insight and made me want to explore the depths as well.

Okay, okay, this is already insanely long and I am so sorry (I am unsure if anyone will ever read this lol), but now I want to give a shout out to ALL OF YOU, who are here, writing with me! All of you are so, so amazing and I am so glad to have met you, and I hope we can continue to write for as long as our muses and our creativity will let us. Thank you, again, and please take a look at those awesome people in case you aren't already following each other:

First of all, amazing writers and amazing people in general that I look up to (in no particular order), who are inspiring me in so many ways, make me feel a bit like a teenager gazing at their favorite star (lol) and just... are great people, yes, that I just want to mention separately for varying reasons:

@ssolessurvivor (Friend! Omg! When you first followed me, I could never imagine how things would ever develop - and how well Logan would fit to Khan, how their story developed into what it is now, so deeply plotted and filled with so many sub-stories and little moments that push both our muses along, allow me to explore my Khan on so many levels... it's insane how attached he is to your Logan, and I am so, so happy about us being in so much contact and just keep plotting and talk about everything! You are such a friendly mun and I am so, so grateful that you indulge me, even over on Stephen (hehe). I hope we can keep writing for a long time; Thank you so much for letting me throw in all my ideas about Khan, all the quirky things about him, I am so, so grateful!!! ♥)

@darehearts (I felt insanely welcomed by you, giving my Khan *and* my Bones such a chance to interact with Kirk ♥ Thank you so much for that, and thank you so much for indulding in my Khan-joins-the-crew idea as a Kirk-writer. That's definitely not something you need to do and yet you allow me. Ahhh! I was so blown away when you asked me if I wanted to become mains sdfasadfasd. Still am honestly because I am just a potato haha. Thank you for being here and being such a kind person ♥)

@strxngetimes (seriously, I was so nervous approaching you first but I am so glad I did; I do look up to you like you're some kind of superstar (haha) and I am still amazed that you gave me the chance of exploring things the way we do. Thank you for indulging me AND enduring me (and my muse lol), and you really, really inspire me in so many ways when it comes to your Stephen, it's amazing. You actually caused my interest for him to go back up into flames and for me to join the MCU fandom lol (and I would also bother you on your tony BUT i am SO UNWORTHY hahaha). Thank you - I hope we can keep writing for a while longer ♥ And I look forward to everything that might further develop between Khan and Stephen. Very much <3 Love them a lot!)

@mehrere-musen (Ok but really, of course I have to mention you. The way you accepted me, the way we started to write and things just??? Happened??? I love interacting with you and your Stephen and I love the way he works with Khan too, and I am so happy that you allowed me to be with the two where they are. Our thread has almost 800 notes by now which is insane, and with how we keep having ideas, it might go further than that lol. Thank you so much for indulging me - and thank you to Stephen to make Khan so insanely happy. :) ! I hope we can continue to write for a long time! ♥)

@fasciinating (SPAWK! I know we don't do a lot of OOC chatting in any way but our thread??? You are so good for just throwing us into that mess and for you to be like 'lmao ok here let Khan do whatever' and where are Spock and Khan now??? A NIGHTMARE LOL. I love the creativity and how you maneuvered us into that mess of a situation and how we can just seriously fuck moments up and go 'ah yeah somehow there's a rabbit also the world explodes'. I also love the way you write Spock! Thank you so much for giving my Khan a chance, despite his 'AU-ness', and that I get to explore such an interesting storyline! I was also very happy to have found you again, because I remember you from a long time ago (even though we didn't write much back then I think? But I remembered your name!)).

@sxbaist (MY BELOVED! God, you have no idea how insanely happy I was when I realized you were still there. Vega has stolen Khan's heart back when we first wrote so many years ago and when I rebooted him with his AU Version, my heart almost stopped when I saw you were still active and around. I was so, so nervous to approach you - but you welcomed me back, so did Vega welcome back my Khan, and honestly... I love them so, so much, and I adore you so much as a person. Thank you for doing all of that, for allowing me back, for Khan to have his wonderful woman back and for them to enjoy each other. It feels like as if they never got separated at all and I cannot express my gratitude enough, really. You as a person are so awesome as well and I will forever wait for your return! You are also the only other Khan I write with, so I will mention your @paramounticebound here too because your Khan is insanely great and I look up to him so, so much, people need to know!!!)

@vuulpecula (OK but listen, I know we also don't do much OOC chatting at all BUT!!! I just have to mention you here too because the things we do are just so??? SO??? HNNG like lmao we just write each other like 'ok what should happen' AND THEN DOOM HAPPENS to either Khan / Fox and Stephen / Fox LOL as if we got no chill really! I enjoy it a lot to explore those plots and see where things will go! Also you are such a kind person and so easy to talk to!!! Thank you for also indulging me on Stephen hehe ♥ and also all the things on Khan ofc!)

If I could, I would write every single one of you such a text, but alas... if I were to, I wouldn't be finished in 2025 (lol), so I hope you take my gratitude and my love for you as a combined package as well; You are all wonderful people and I am so glad to have you here, and it has been a joy - I hope it will continue to be a joy in the future too, and I cannot wait to see how things will develop (once again, in no particular order):

@whydotheykeeptakingmine ♥ @noblehcart ♥ @resignedworkaholics ♥ (also over on Stephen) @he1msman | @spacesk1pper | @entrpz ♥ (also on Bones) @ensnchekov | @cosmiicheskaya ♥ (also on Bones) @vulku ♥ @onlybonesleft ♥ @wtsns | @agntross ♥ (also over on Stephen) @goodheartedfool ♥ @oceansfirst ♥ (also over on Stephen) @kingofthewebxxx ♥ (also over on Stephen) @fallenregent ♥ @danversiism ♥ @nursc ♥ (also over at Bones) @nightmdic ♥ @brooklynislandgirl ♥ @defectivexfragmented ♥ (also over on Stephen) @haiiling ♥ @gcldenratio ♥ @hiippocrates ♥ @tangleweave ♥ (In case I have forgotten someone: I am so, so, so, so, sorry!!!!)

Also, last but not least: Should you not be named on this list, this does not mean I am not grateful for you or don't appreciate you! I thank you for being here, especially if we have already written something... and even if you follow me and I do not follow back, I am still immensely grateful that you're here in the first place, even if you might not stay ♥.

Thank you so much for every single one of you, really - everyone I mentioned here, everyone I did not. Because of YOU my experience on this (and my two other blogs) is what it is. Without you I wouldn't be where I am now, I wouldn't be able to explore my Khan, my Bones, my Stephen, and I wouldn't be able to have such a good time.

I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST FOR 2024 - MAY GOOD LUCK, LOTS OF LOVE, HAPPINESS AND FORTUNE COME YOUR WAY! No matter where you are, or what your plans are... you are valid, you deserve to be here, you deserve to do what you want to do and you deserve all the good things coming for you.

THANK YOU.

L. finally over and out. (and if you read up this far, you'll get a cookie from me!)

#Out Of Character #tw long post #A thank you post to all of you. I know it is insanely long)#(but i can never keep myself short lol)

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savedpeople · 1 year ago

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MULTIMUSE QUESTIONAIRE

RULES: Answer the questions with the Muses that would best fit the answers. Bonus if you give details why. If tagged, copy and paste into a new post – DO NOT REBLOG!

(Since this is a single-muse blog, I'm going to include muses I've played on other blogs. I'm not going to include every muse I've ever written though because 1. it already feels funny talking about muses that 99% of my followers have never seen me write, and 2. some of them were very short-lived. So I'm only including the ones that I've written most or were most significant, plus my newest one that I haven't written yet, since they've been on my mind a lot lately.)

1) Rank your softest Muse and your toughest Muse. (Personality-wise) - Strictly personality-wise, softest to toughest: Ted Logan (Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure), Max Caulfield (Life is Strange), Izaya Orihara (Durarara!!), Amaimon (Blue Exorcist), Satoru Gojo (Jujutsu Kaisen), Negan, Levi Ackerman (Attack on Titan.) This is kind of funny though because aside from Ted and Max, none of these characters can really be considered "soft."

2) Which Muse would blow through $1000 quickly? - Gojo. But he's also rich rich, so $1000 is nothing to him. He canonically owns shirts that cost more than that. Aside from him, I think if you gave Ted $1000 he could easily blow it all on music gear and albums pretty quickly lol.

3) Do any of them have nicknames? Is there a meaning behind them? - Negan has been called "Neegs" by a few, but not many can get away with that. "Ted" is short for Theodore, and "Max" is short for Maxine (never call Max by her full name, she hates it.)

4) Are any of them up-to-speed on the latest trends? Anyone more old school? - Ted, Gojo, and Max are most likely to be up-to-speed on trends, but Max appreciates the old school stuff (she prefers analog cameras over digital for her photography, for instance.) Levi and Negan are more old school, though Negan might attempt to learn trends to seem cool to his students/the kids (it rarely works.)

5) Who has the best relationship with their siblings? - Three of them have siblings: Ted, Izaya, and Amaimon. Ted and his little brother probably have the best relationship, at least as kids, though he deals with insecurity and envy as their dad clearly favors his brother. Izaya has two sisters who are twins and about ten years his junior. Their parents were abroad for work so much that he basically raised them, but his bad influence played part in them turning out eccentric. Their relationship is complicated and a bit love/hate. Amaimon has six brothers and a sister. They are all demons (literally, they are children of Satan lol.) He's only seen interacting with one which I interpret him to have a neutral to positive relationship with. I don't see him having a close relationship with any of the others. But I also haven't read or watched the series in years, so I have no idea if more has been revealed.

6) Karaoke night! Who is likely to grab the mic first and bust out a tune? - Ted. Max will join him with some encouragement. Negan if he's had a few drinks.

7) Who is least likely to enter a beauty pageant/model? - Levi (he could actually probably do well as a model, but suggest this and he'll vehemently deny it.) Also Amaimon because he doesn't spend much time on Earth and probably doesn't even know what a beauty pageant is.

8) If your Muses visited a haunted house where actors scare you, who would panic and who would be unfazed? - Ted and Max would be panicking (but they're having a blast.) Levi and Amaimon are unfazed.

9) Are any of your Muses particular about taking certain modes of transportation? - Not really. Max does get nervous about airplanes and Izaya prefers to walk or take a taxi/public transport. Gojo doesn't drive and either takes the train/subway, has his assistant drive him, or teleports/warps short distances since he can do that lol.

10) Share a little-known fact about any Muse. - So I can't really think of anything, but I have twd verses for most of my muses that I never got to use/talk about so I'mma ramble on about little things about them here. Ted - and Bill - were following a band on tour that summer, and were at a music venue in the Atlanta area when the outbreak hit. Bill's dad died saving them the first day, and they and Missy go on to survive traveling around in their RV for a while. Max found an old vintage photography store shortly after the outbreak and took as many packs of polaroid film as she could realistically carry. She continues taking photos, not just to document the new world but to also capture small moments of beauty and happiness within her group. Gojo acts nonchalant about the apocalypse until he loses his best friend to a walker bite, after which he essentially shuts down and locks himself in a room with the (restrained) walker for days, refusing to let anyone in. He even attempts to remove its jaw/hands to keep it with him (kind of like Michonne did), and it wasn't until after that he finally killed it. He puts on a big smile and acts fine, but the unresolved anger and grief come out in spades whenever he goes up against walkers. Izaya and his sisters are in an airport preparing to fly back to Japan when the outbreak hits, and get stranded in the Virginia/DC area. A group takes them in out of pity, despite Izaya giving them the creeps. But when his sisters are eaten in a large walker attack, the group abandons him, and he's presumed dead. Months later, cue The Saviors showing up with Izaya at Negan's side as one of his lieutenants. Surprise! Levi meets up with his uncle, the only family he has, when the outbreak happens. It doesn't take long for them to start butting heads morally - his uncle is much quicker to warm up to the idea of stealing and killing. But they stick together until they're separated while fighting a horde, and Levi's been on his own ever since, unsure if he's alive. He's eventually taken in by Alexandria, but has a hard time adjusting. I don't have anything set for Amaimon, but he's naturally violent and off-putting and very likely ends up with the Whisperers or becomes a cannibal or something lol.

tagged by: @wexarethewalkingxdead tagging: @esoterium @survivoirs @chitteringbeast and anyone else that'd like to do this (y'all are the only active mutuals I know that have multiple muses and weren't already tagged I don't think??)

#dash games #my weeb past rearing its ugly head #max out there being the only female muse out of fourteen muses. girl i am so sorry #this got me very nostalgic so thank you lol #t.wd (and a.ttack on t.itan) is my go-to au for my muses and i've always enjoyed not only seeing how they'd fit into a story #but how they might interact with each other within the same au #since they're all from different fandoms. crossovers within crossovers lol #so i apologize for the block of text with that last question #✘ || Excuse the shit out of my goddamn french ( ooc )

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zelinksupporter · 1 year ago

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Chucky and Tiffany were the worst couple I’d ever seen put on film. They literally had only one thing in common (their love of murder) and very clearly wanted very different things from the relationship that the other had no intention of providing. But being toxic and codependant was Don’s intention with their relationship the entire time, so I can’t really get mad at him for it

I didn't really remember Andy’s foster parents at all, so I don't really care about them either way

I don't even think Andy and Kristen are still together, so again, I don’t really care

I hated literally everyone in that house with the sole exception of Nica and Alice

I felt bad for Lexy’s dad because his wife cared more about being the mayor than she did about him or their children

I also felt bad for Bree because Logan cared so little about her thoughts and opinions that she voluntarily checked herself into therapy

I loathed Junior and Lexy as a couple with every fiber of my being. Lexy did not deserve Junior at all and I still feel that way. She cheated on Junior and continued to see her side piece after he forgave her. She even dressed as Junior’s dead uncle because her ego was badly bruised and desperately needed something to recover it. I don't think Lexy deserves Grant either because he’s genuinely a good guy who just wants some friends and Lexy (and by extension Jake and Devon) are taking advantage of him using his dead baby brother to manipulate him. Honestly, the only romantic relationship Lexy deserves is the one she had with Oliver because he’s just as terrible as she is. He knew she had a boyfriend and still dated her and, when Lexy was pretending to be Jake’s dad, Oliver was laughing and cheering for her while filming it on his phone. When Junior shows anger about their affair, Lexy’s first instinct is to turn it around on him and more or less admit she is still seeing Oliver by threatening to talk to him. Neither of them cared about Junior at all and yet he continued to be abused by them

I still think Jake and Devon genuinely love each other. Their fights in Season 2 were completely justified given the situation they were in and any couple would have tension during it

As for Mr and Mrs Collins, I’m just invested in how Chucky kills Devon Sawa this season

I refuse to acknowledge Nica and Tiffany as a couple because they didn't have a romance of any kind. Nica was kidnapped and held prisoner by Tiffany for over a year. She even chopped her limbs off. And, while Nica didn't need her legs being paralyzed, she openly admits in Season 2 during her confession that she hates Tiffany. I don't even know if Nica even likes girls romantically or sexually. She definitely has more than enough reason to hate Tiffany though

Andy and Nica would be cute, but they haven't directly interacted enough for me to form any kind of options on them as a couple or even friends. I just saw them as allies united to stop Chucky, so them being a couple means literally nothing to me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

This may be an unpopular opinion, but...

As much as I love BarclayPierce, I don't necessarily want them to be canon in the franchise.

Don't get me wrong, I am desperate for them to interact more in the show. Teaming up and becoming friends after they knew about each other for so long and never got to meet but I would rather see them interact as friends and then read into the performances.

This is because after looking back on the entire franchise I have come to a conclusion:

Don Mancini can not write a healthy romantic relationship to save his life.

Think about it:

Chiffany speaks for itself.

Andy's foster parents in CP2 weren't too bad if it wasn't for the fact that Phil was an asshole (at least in my opinion).

Andy and Kristen in CP3 were sweet, but realistically, it was a teenage crush, and we know for a fact didn't last for whatever reason.

Jesse and Jade seemed cute on the surface but then instantly started accusing the other of murder with no evidence.

Barb and Ian's marriage was obviously awful, and by extension, so was Barb and Jill's since Barb was cheating, and they both knew it.

Both Lexy and Junior's parents' relationship was toxic in a way, with Michelle and Logan being narcissists and constantly ignoring or shutting down their sposes opinions.

Lexy and Junior's relationship was pretty similar, too, with Junior even admitting that he was afraid of Lexy.

Jake and Devon started off cute, but as I've said before, with all the conflict in Season 2, it seems that they are more in love with their idea of the other person rather than the person themselves. Even in season 3, we haven't really seen them emotionally connect, it just keeps being overly sexualized scenes (which is a whole other conversation)

Grant and Lexy (if they count) it is basically all manipulation since Lexy apparently can't stand Grant and is only pretending to like him to get to Chucky, with it only hinting that her opinion may have changed on him after he opened up about losing his brother. (Let's not even start about the fact that Jackson was 22 and Alyvia was 15 when they filmed that kiss scene.)

And finally, James and Charlotte Collins, where it has been revealed that James has previously cheated on Charlotte and she is still with him even after finding out.

I'm not even counting Niffany as a relationship since it is purely Tiffany abusing Nica.

So, yeah. Personally, I don't trust Don to not mess BarclayPierce up if he did decide to make them canon so I would rather get excited about their little friendly interactions and see what Alex and Fiona would do with their performances.

#chucky #chucky 2021 #child's play #chucky syfy

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transformationloveb · 2 years ago

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Ranting About Sanders Sides Again Because I Can

The fact that Roman and Virgil are currently the two sides with the most stable relationship out of the whole cast right now is just, so sweet to me.

Technically you could make a case for Janus and Remus's relationship or Janus and Patton's relationship, but Janus and Remus haven't actually interacted in a canon episode just yet, and Janus and Patton's relationship is just really getting started, so I'm not counting either of those just yet.

Now, Roman and Virgil. We know them, we love them, and I think all of us know that their relationship initially started off pretty rocky. For pretty much all of Season 1 they didn't exactly get along at all. But since then, they've gotten to the point where they're genuinely really good friends, (I'd personally even call them best friends!) and they've still got their usual banter, but at this point it's become their thing. They're not really Roman and Virgil without it!

The fact that Roman's become so much more closed off towards everyone else, but is still happily bantering with Virgil really just goes to show how much he trusts him. And it makes sense! Virgil's proven to him that he actually cares about him (see FWSA for reference) and in turn that's caused Roman to become much more comfortable around him! I mean, just look at how Roman talks about him in the 5th Anniversary Episode compared to when he's talking about the others!!

"patton"

"logan"

"virgil"

See the difference? I certainly do!

Whether you consider their relationship to be currently the most stable in the series right now or not, you have to admit that Roman's relationship with Virgil is most definitely his own most stable one out of everyone right now. Including Thomas!

Honestly, if we don't get to see Roman and Virgil being freaking best friends in the season finale, you will not hear the end of it from me. There will be many a grumpy rant coming from my end.

I'm very excited to see how their relationship develops from here, both with how they're gonna be responding to Janus's acceptance, and with their interactions with just each other on their own. It'll be nice! And I'm very excited to see how it all plays out! :)

Also the Sanders Sides season finale cannot come soon enough, I am absolutely craving more content and I cannot wait to see what happens next.

Alright! That's all from me for now! See you all again soon!! 👋

#if we don't get roman's issues being addressed and roman and virgil being besties in the season finale i will riot #also i cannot wait to get more Roman angst in the upcoming episodes #it's gonna be great #sanders sides #ts sanders sides #roman sanders #virgil sanders #roman angst #roman sanders angst #prinxiety #sanders sides rant #rambles from yours truly #sanders sides season finale #ts prinxiety #ts roman #ts virgil #sanders sides analysis

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fakeloveaskblog · 4 years ago

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Yeah… *deflates, putting a hand to the back of my head* Sadly, I can't fix dysphoria, but getting around the soap allergy might make things a tiny bit less unpleasant overall? Correct me if I'm wrong, but I do think you have a soap allergy? Unless you haven't had that diagnosed yet? *notices the company* Ah Remy! I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to startle you! Yeah. I'm Remus's nonbinary demon friend. Hi. Don't you worry about the plushie! It'll be intangible and invisible to, ahem, potential threats, so your boyfriend shouldn't be able to see it unless you point it out, and he also won't be able to interact with it either until you do. The enchantment is tricky stuff, but it's designed to be soft and make you feel safe. *throws an owl plushie at the nearest couch* This one's Logan's! Up to specification, with the tiny tie and glasses and everything. It also comes with a tiny hat for the snake plushie, fair warning though, put that over its head and it won't detach unless Janus tries it. Gotta go rest the magic exhaustion, you two have a nice day now, do tell Janus I say hi but maybe don't break into his apartment without prior warning!

Remy: "I dunno about you babe but that tots sounds like reverse psychology to make us like even more hyped to break into Janny's apartement"

Remus nodded along "Oh yeah totally! Also yeah I got a soap allergy, it matches my aesthetic. Sometimes I put soap on my face so it will give me cool rashes that look like freckles!!"

"That ain't sounding too healthy" They were sitting buried under at least 4 plushies becuase their friend had wanted to show of all of the demon plushies he'd gotten.

"It's for fashion!" He did jazz hands.

"Fäshiön! öf cöurse!" They moved their hands as if they were an influencer clicking their nails in response. This was true communication.

Remus poked at the owl and snake plushies. Truly they were some of the most magnificently crafted plushies he'd ever seen. He tried to think of the best ways to give them. Maybe he could surprise them with the plushies during that murder mystery movie mnight they'd talked about.....Though Logan hadn't texted him about it. He'd tried to not overthink over that. Lo was probably just busy. Hopefully. Or they thought he was annoying and gross and-

"My boyfriend would fucking love talking to a demon. He's like tots into that whole horror thing"

"You should take him with you for a coffee meet up! You make him sound so cool! I'm sure demons like coffee! I could make him a necklace out of animal bones! I'm working on one for JanJan! I'm gonna show him my collection the next time he's here! You want one?"

Remy grimaced "Uh I do appreciate your interests but I don't really like wanna see dead animal parts" They didn't reply to the suggestion of bringing their boyfriend. They hadn't told him Remus or Janus even existed. They were just waiting for the right moment.

"Hehe you're just jealous that you don't have 4 different lizard skins!!"

"Fuck you for being ace so I can't like use my normal bragging things!"

He rubbed his hands together and let out his supervillain laugh "I am indeed invincible!!!"

"Wow can't believe I like lost to like 4 lizard skins"

"It's fäshion!"

"You got me there"

"Also" Remus moved slightly closer "Can I tel you a thingie?"

"Omg babe don't tell me you've already got like a plan on how to break into Janister's apartement!"

Remus snorted "No. I just...the dysphoria is always kinda there in the back of my mind. I just go around all day knowing I don't look right and I'm so annoyingly hyper aware of it when I'm with other people. But ehm when I'm just with you I kinda don't think about it? It just kinda disappears for a lil while. It's nice. Gives me even another reason for why I like being with you"

"Awww baaabe" They let out in a soft tone.

He leaned his forehead against theirs "Trans to trans communication"

They smiled while moving their hand up to his cheek. He put his hand on top of theirs "Trans to trans communication!"

#thanks for the ask!#i put rem and rem in a room together and proceed to black out before waking up to a text about them being cute again #remus sanders #remy sanders #resleep #rem^2 #sanders sides #ask

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coconut-cluster · 5 years ago

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The way sanders sides entire plot revolves around conflict and arguements to get to where it needs to be and some people really wanna say that a ship w characters who have had more conflicting plotlines automatically makes them an unhealthy couple even tho literally every character except for janus& remus (since they haven't interacted yet) have, at some point had an arguement or opposing views

Big agree. I completely understand disliking a ship (or all the ships!) if their arguing makes you uncomfortable or generally wary of them. A lot of people who do ship them, though, do it according to their base archetypes - nerd, theatre kid, emo, whatever u get the point - and not their actual, conflict-ridden dynamic in the series. Like Logan and Janus have yet to have a truly positive interaction, and based on the series their dynamic is almost a rivalry, but I ship them because I like the idea of someone smart and practical like Logan paired with someone clever and a little more sly like Janus. yknow what I mean?

#ask #discourse #loceit

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ordinaryfander · 6 years ago

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The new video sure was something, uh

So, as usual I'm here to brag about the newest video. This time, I'm going to analyze "Dealing with INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS", and it's a long analysis/theory, so be patient with me.

This will majorly center around Remus and "the Others", so beware! (I'm so happy I don't have to call them Dark Sides anymore, it was never fair)

I wrote many points to consider, and each one will take quite a bit. With that, let's begin!

1) So:

[ 1) Remus: Who he is, what he does, why he's there ]

I think we can all agree that his debut was a surprise, especially because most of us were expecting the "Green Side" to be associated with something like Envy, or Greed, since dark green is sometimes associated with money.

However, we got Remus, aka Intrusive Thoughts, which I think is, in my opinion, the best option they could face.

So: he is Thomas' nasty thoughts, the evil, twisted fantasies, and he keeps Thomas' awake at night with dark ideas, he gives him the worst thoughts to deal with, things Thomas is deeply troubled to think of, because as Logan said, his catholic beliefs instilled in him that thought is the precursor of action.

Remus is there, and why is he there?

The fun thing is: I don't think he's there to be "useful". Later I'll explain where I think his Character Arc is going to go, but Remus really doesn't have any reason to be there except that intrusive thoughts are something absolutely everyone deals with. You all have to consider that, even if those are Thomas' Sides, they're also everyone's Sides. We all have Logic, Creativity, Morality, Anxiety, and we all lie (I'll return to that).

And this traits help us live with eveyday life?

But intrusive thoughts? They just majorly upset us, and worsen our view of ourselves, but we all still have them.

However, I'm really happy with this choice, because Thomas is starting to really show what I've been screaming since Deceit's debut: things are not black and white, and he is NOT a completely good person, because NO ONE is, not 100%. We can act like good people and sincerely mean to do good, but we're still gonna have dark, horrible thoughts. And, as Thomas' said, that's ok. Those thoughts don't make you a bad person if you don't act on them, but you should consider a therapist/psychiatrist if they bother you too much. There's no shame in that, too: please, reach out for help, if needed.

[ 2) Remus' relationships with: Roman, Deceit, and Virgil ]

- Remus' relationship with Roman

At 35:50, it's officially and definitely confirmed that Remus and Roman are brothers, probably even twins.

A moment after the Duke disappears, Roman says "I don't like him".

Thomas goes, at Roman: "So, you have a brother?"

And Roman clearly is uncomfortable with it: "Yeah... It's a little like looking into a fun-house mirror. But instead of a giant head, or, like, long legs or a tiny torso... It shows you everything you don't want to be."

Thomas answers: "That doesn't sound like a very funny house"

And Roman: "Yeah... Uhh, whatever, y'know-? (...)"

Roman and Remus obviously don't get along, but we understood that the moment Remus knocked out Roman with that weapon I don't know the name of (sorry rip, don't focus on this :'))

Roman considers himself a dashing Disney Prince, a knight in shining armor, an example of bravery and justice, while Remus is pure chaotic evil. He doesn't care what other people think and his idea of fun and fantasy is twisted, and he isn't afraid of Roman and his sword in the slightest. They're opposites.

Unluckily we didn't get much brotherly interactions or interactions at all, so there's no much to say, but those two have a whole damn lot to work through.

The question that many have been asking is: do Roman and Remus share a room?

The answer is: I honestly don't know. It would be a complete and utter mess that Roman would hate to have to share. Time will tell.

- Remus' relationship with Deceit

We haven't even seen them interacting on screen, but we already know so damn much about it.

WAY BACK in "Can LYING Be Good?", this was said about Deceit:

Roman: "If you really don't want to know something, he (Deceit) can keep our moutjs shut."

And Logan immediately goes "You don't want to believe it. That's where his (Deceit's) power comes from. Things that you want to believe. Things that you wish were true. And things that you wish weren't."

And later:

Deceit is able to shut up the Sides, but he's also able to hide them. That's what he did with Remus, he kept him locked away.

I've always been rooting for morally gray/sympathetic Deceit, but I'll try to stay neutral on this: though, I really believe that Deceit was trying to protect Thomas.

Remus is... A lot, to say the least. He's pure chaos, and isn't useful or helpful (for now) and doesn't even care to be. Deceit, on the other side, really cares about Thomas, and he showed that in many ways: he just cares about Thomas in his own way. Missing the callback of SVS still hurts Thomas after all this time, and I already explained why Deceit tried his best to do what was good for Thomas in court (https://ordinaryfander.tumblr.com/post/183871155711/thomas-shouldve-gone-to-do-the-callback-he).

I also said, tho, that in SVS Deceit was frustrated to no end because the other Sides weren't listening to him.

Look how confused he is at Patton's words.

You know why? Because Thomas thinks what he says. Thomas lies, and Deceit is there to prove it.

But they didn't listen to Deceit, but Deceit isn't like Virgil: Virgil waited lots of episodes to be listened to until he finally ducked out.

Deceit straight up released Thomas' worst thoughts because Thomas had to face in the most hard way that he is n o t a completely honest person. Deceit just got really pissed and went: "You know what? I'm useful, you need me and I'll prove it."

And he just did that. He straight up released Remus, Thomas' worst thoughts, on them. Deceit is the only one who could do that, and you know why he did?

Remus: "Thomas, speaking of knowledge; recently a snake offered me a morsel from the tree of knowledge. He said you're wanting to be more honest and be direct dealing with your issues, no longer will you deceive yourself about the ugliness within you, me!"

Deceit smacked in the face Thomas with Remus, so Thomas could get the point. I think he did. "If you don't want to lie to yourself, at least face who you really are"

About Remus and Deceit alone...

I don't think Deceit really likes Remus. Deceit is kinda goofy, but he's also sophisticated, charming, a silver-tongue. Remus is a stinky garbage man.

Deceit wants to protect Thomas' reputation, Remus would destroy it. Probably Remus likes Deceit (I think he likes everyone, he doesn't care), but Deceit doesn't really reciprocate the feeling. I could surely be proven wrong, those are just my points.

- Remus' relationship with Virgil

Boy oh boy.

Well, the video already said what I could'be said: Virgil dislikes Remus, he doesn't trust him, but he's also not as scared of him anymore like he used to be.

Virgil, at Remus (32:27): "I thought you were some... Horrible illness. Now I can see that you're just a common cold, a mild inconvenience that's gone before you know it."

And Remus looks at him like this:

That's not a evil look. He's soft, almost proud.

He isn't even offended. He just goes "Eheh, you tickle me, emo."

And Virgil has one blink-and-you-miss-it-moment when he genuinely smiles.

I think he did somehow used to like (platonically y'all) Remus, even if he was scared of him. They were still... Friends, maybe, at some point. Deceit and Virgil never had such a kind-of-sweet moment, even if just a few seconds long, and even if the Duke and Virgil still are not likely to get along in general and for the time being. The Duke's phrase about Old Times wasn't a welcomed one by Virgil.

I don't wanna dig in too much else, we already know that Virgil doesn't still trust the Duke. That was just some looks I noticed that stuck with me.

Also, I won't ignore the fragment revelead his name and said: "Of course (I told you, Thomas), I would never hide anything to you." And it cuts right off to Virgil. Eh. Busted.

- How Will His Character Arc Go?

That one is the most important question.

Everyone is gonna believe what they will, but I don't think he'll get... Sympathetic, even? He's just pure chaos.

Maybe his Arc will entangle with a Roman new one, maybe his Arc will entangle with Deceit's. I do hope that Thomas and co. will now value Deceit better, he really isn't that bad... At least, not compared to Remus.

Deceit shut up Logan guys, but Remus straight up murdered him. Even if they can't literally die, y'all really can't close a whole eye on that.

So I just think he's gonna stay around and do mischief, but will surely get some sort of development related to other characters. I'm almost sure he won't get a Solo Arc, surely not for now. However, I'm pretty sure they'll get back to talk how to manage him, and how he can become more useful.

- Conclusions and predictions for the next video

Honestly, sorry this was messier than my normal analysis/theory posts, but I don't fully know how to take Remus yet.

Y'all see, the moment I knew Deceit I made my mind up: he's morally gray, he has a purpose, he has to get credit for it.

Remus confused me in every possible way. He's chaos. I'm sure we won't see him in the next video, but I predict maybe Deceit will be in it, just to look how good of a job he's done.

And that's pretty much it. I hope you all have a good time :>

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britswriting · 2 years ago

Text

Devotion (6)

Devotion Masterlist

Read on Wattpad

quelle surprise: What (a) surprise

Warning: Sexual Content - brief

*Leighton's POV*

I always thought pregnancy was something beautiful. You're creating life. What's more beautiful than that?

"I can't believe you're 5 weeks along. I impregnated you 5 weeks ago!" Colby stated in disbelief, the two of us leaving our first OBGYN appointment.

"I'm 7 weeks now, thank you very much" I corrected, Colby rolling his eyes.

"You were 5 when you found out; which is.. woah"

"I'm honestly shocked I found out that early. I mean, I guess I had symptoms but they were also things I had with my period" I shrugged, "I just.. it was a nagging feeling in the back of my mind, and I haven't gotten it yet so.."

"When can we tell people? I'm going to go crazy if I can't tell Sam, or my dad! You're having my baby"

"What about your mom? She doesn't get to know?" I chuckled, Colby groaning, which wiped the smug look right off my face. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, I'm fine" He dismissed and I decided to let it go for now, not wanting to ruin this moment.

"Alright, well where to next? We have a few hours before dinner with my family. Rumor has it, Lexi might actually show this time. Have you heard from Brennen?"

"I have not"

"Great. Perfect. Just fucking fantastic." I exaggerated, my chest dropping to my stomach as imagery of them doing more than friendly interactions flashes through my head. "If I see his hands on her-"

"Alright my next UFC fighter, calm down. She's an adult, remember?" He said, his hands squeezing my hips, stopping my movements.

"Whose side are you on?"

"Whatever side still lands me in my bed tonight" He smugly grinned and I glared, Colby kissing my forehead. "I know this isn't the ideal position to be in, but... look, we've all been there. We've all had our Brennen"

"Our Brennen?"

"You know, that thing that looks really fun and pretty and the second we smoke it, drink it or sleep with it, we regret it?"

I tried desperately to hold back my laugh, but little noises kept slipping from my lips, Colby trying to hold back his own smile.

"Isn't he your best friend?" I snickered, Colby shrugging.

"Sam's my best friend. Lately I don't know who Brennen is. He's been distant. If this is the life he wants to follow, who am I the one to stop him? Like I said, she's an adult. He's an adult. Can't really do anything about it"

"Doesn't change the fact that she's my baby sister"

"I know, and I love how protective you are of your family. Of our children, of me. But, we've got to let her make the mistake"

"What if he isn't a mistake?" I asked quietly. "What if she is with him long term? What if Brennen is her Gabe?" I nervously asked, the two of us walking past a few shops down the sidewalk.

"I thought you liked Brennen?"

"I liked Brennen before he put his hands on my baby sister"

"You can't keep saying it like that, Leighton. She's 21"

"She's still my baby sister Colby!"

"She's 21 Leighton"

"HE'S 28!" I shouted, catching attention from a few other pedestrians.

"Okay. Let's just take a breath. We'll see what happens at dinner, okay? Now, there appears to be a nursery shop two stores down. Would you like to go in there with me?"

Colby and I awed over different baby items, frequently bringing up when Gemma was that little, and how it feels like it was just yesterday that I was digging through thrift store bins for newborn clothes.

Colby ended up purchasing something, yet refused to show me what it was; claiming it was a surprise.

That evening we went to my parents for dinner, and quelle surprise, Lexi didn't show.

"Are you going to join us?" Logan asked, setting his plate on the table.

I shook my head, walking past the table, two plates in hand.

I carefully climbed the steps, peeking around my shoulder to see Colby following my lead, a small smile cracking my cheeks.

I mouthed "Thank you", Colby nodding.

Colby opened my moms door for me, my lips rolling inwards as I set the two plates on the dresser.

"Hi mom" I spoke up, my voice cracking, causing me to clear my throat. "Colby and I are here. We brought dinner"

"Hi sunshine" Mom's voice was hoarse, a lump in my throat appearing as I smiled softly.

"Here, let us help you" Colby announced, both of us walking over to help her sit up.

Once she was sat upright, we positioned pillows to keep her more comfortable. I handed her her food, Taking a seat on the bed next to her, Colby sat across from me.

"You guys didn't have to do this" She said quietly.

"Why wouldn't I want to hang out with my mother?" I asked, my mom beginning to laugh, only to start coughing.

I offered her a drink, softly patting her back until it subsided.

"If only teenage" She struggled, "Teenage you could hear... hear.. yourself" She joked, struggling to inhale and exhale easily, clearing her throat.

The three of us talked for about 10 minutes before the bedroom door opened again, Cynthia, Harper and Gemma walking in with their own dinner plates, a smile on my mom's face.

"Nonna!" Gemma squealed, Cynthia quickly telling her to be careful with the plate, taking it from the toddler so she could climb onto the bed, crawling next to Colby before taking her plate back.

"What are you girls doing in here?" My mom asked, her voice becoming more raspy.

"Eat wif Nonna!" Harper grinned, copying Gemma and sitting down in front of her grandmother.

I looked over, seeing my mom's eyes glisten with tears, a smile on her face as her family members slowly came in, taking a stand at the dresser, or a seat on the floor.

"You guys didn't have to do this" She whispered, Landon shaking his head. "You're our mom, mom. We want to have dinner with you"

I watched a tear roll down her face, setting my plate aside, I cradled her in my arms.

"Don't cry mom. We love you. You'd never let us miss family dinner when we were younger, what's different now?"

"I love you guys too" She whispered, wiping at her face.

"If you cry, I'm going to cry!" Cynthia fake whined, quickly blinking.

I moved spots with my dad, letting him sit next to my mom and before I could sit on the floor, Colby quickly offered me his spot.

We all sat in my parents bedroom, eating dinner with my mom, and I couldn't help but feel sorry for Lexi.

She was the only person missing.

Colby, Logan and the toddlers helped carry our plates back down to the kitchen, Cynthia, Landon and I stayed behind with my parents, My mom's eyes drifting shut every few moments.

"We should leave her alone to rest" Cynthia mentioned, my moms eyes popping open as she shook her head.

"Want to be with my family" She reassured, her fragile hand reaching out for mine, her cold hand enclosing on my warm one. "Thank you" She said softly and I nodded, my eyes watering as I took her all in.

The way she looked, the way she smelled, the way her voice felt like melted honey to my ears.

Landon quickly left the room, Cynthia trailing behind him, leaving me alone with my parents.

Imagery of when I sat on this very bed a few years prior, telling my mom I was pregnant went through my head like the best and worst dream imaginable.

"Why are you crying honey?" My dad spoke up, reaching out to place a hand on my knee.

"It's nothing" I whimpered, wiping at my face.

"It's going to be okay sunshine" Mom reassured me and I just nodded, swallowing the lump and throwing on a happy face.

She was my rock, now I needed to be hers.

I gnawed on my lower lip as I contemplated just spitting out that I was pregnant, not wanting to miss my chance, but I wanted to tell her with Colby.

I heard the cutest giggles get closer to the door before Gemma ran in, Uncle Logan chasing her, which was the reason for the giggles.

"Papa! Elp!" She squealed, trying to get away from her uncle.

I watched the scene unfold in front of me, tears streaming down my face as my dad quickly scooped her up, placing her between her Nonna and Papa where, and I quote "Uncle Logan can never get you" causing Logan to halt at the side of the bed, pretending her couldn't reach her, groaning of frustration as Gemma's eyes widened at the fact that her Papa was right.

"Go get him princess!" My dad encouraged, a cheesy grin on my daughter's face as she attacked Logan, Logan encasing her in his arms as he carefully fell to the floor with her, admitting defeat.

"I got Wogan!" She giggled, cheering as Logan pretended to play day. "Papa, I did it! I did it! I got Wogan! Wogan no get me!" She giggled, clapping.

I wiped at my face, sending my older brother a grateful smile to which he nodded at, Gemma crawling back into the bed.

"Nonna, Nonna! See me get Wogan!" She exclaimed, my mom nodding and slowly moving to hug her, telling her how proud she was of her.

I quickly excused myself, almost tripping over my brother who steadied me before hurrying out of the room and racing down the steps.

The tears streamed down my face as I speed walked into the kitchen, the impact of my hug on Colby causing him to wobble.

"Oof" He grunted, his hand gripping the counter as I balled into his chest. "Hey, woah! What happened?" He asked with a panic, his arms squeezing me tight as I cried.

"I can't lose her" I cried, my hand gripping his t-shirt like my life depended on it. "I can't- I can't-" I gasped, a struggled whine falling from my lips as Colby pulled away, cradling my face in his hands, his thumbs wiping the tears. "I can't lose her" I whimpered, Colby leaning down, whispering, "I know" between us, his breath softly hitting my face before he placed a sweet kiss against my lips, and I knew he could taste the saltiness of my tears before pulling away, "I know" He repeated before hugging me again.

"Come on. Let's go take a walk" He pulled away, grabbing my hand and leading me to the backyard.

The warm stagnant air smacked me in the face, my nose wrinkling at the feeling.

We sat down on the grass, the peaceful singular blades of grass grazing my bare thighs, the tickling sensation making me shift so I wasn't touching it, letting my fingers push through it.

"I don't recognize her" I confessed, staring up at the yellow and orange sunset, feeling Colby's gaze on me. "The woman in front of me isn't who I grew up with, and that terrifies me" I continued, turning to look over at the man I adored, his blue eyes intently staring back, the wrinkles from his held back frown shining on his face. "I mean, she's the same beautiful woman I grew up with. The smiles, the laughs... that's all her.. but her face?" My voice cracked, glancing back up at the sky. "I've never... I've never.." I swallowed, sniffling as I looked back over at him, "I don't want to live like this. To watch her like this. To remember her like this. The tiredness in her eyes isn't from getting old... and I hate that. Those eyes I used to stare into as she held me... they don't look the same"

Colby stayed silent and I sniffled, blinking the tears away as my fingers moved to the bloating of my stomach, sighing, I felt a hand grab mine, getting me to look down at our hands before back up at him.

"I've learned that life doesn't play to win, but teaches us lessons and as dumb as it sounds... maybe you need to go through this. I love you, and I hate seeing you in pain and to be honest, I don't know what to say to make it all better, but I'm here for you. I hear you and I love you"

"I love you too. Sorry for crying" I apologized, my hair falling down to cover my face from his view as I played with the grass again, Colby's hand brushing the left side of my hair to my back.

"Never apologize for showing your emotions. I'd rather you tell me you're hurting, than suffer in silence. I know you've suffered in silence, and I have as well. It fucking sucks. This shit sucks and it's hard and at times feels utterly unbearable.. but you're Leighton Rae Fox. The girl who kicks addictions ass, and raises a beautiful little girl on her own, even if she won't take credit for it. You fall on your ass and you get back up. Your mom is dying, and that shit is unimaginable unless you've truly gone through it... but we're doing this together. We'll get through it together. People can keep disappearing but you're never alone. I promise"

"Don't make promises you can't keep" I whispered, looking over at him, hating the way he was looking at me.

His eyes were full of sympathy and I could see he was trying to understand how I was feeling; yet coming up empty.

"I know" He nodded and I took a deep breath through my nose.

"Promise?" I asked, a small smile breaking out onto his face as he nodded.

"Promise"

"Are you excited to see Uncle Sam?" I asked Gemma, Gemma upset that she couldn't go into the airport with Colby.

She nodded, a pout on her pink lips.

"Baby, he'll be right back" I chuckled, taking a sip of my water.

Being the three year old she was, she didn't believe me, so the surprise on her face when Colby opened the tailgate for Sam to toss his suitcase into was hysterical.

"I told you bug" I laughed, Gemma waving at Sam who happily climbed into the backseat next to her.

"Gemma!" He cheered, asking for a high five which she happily returned.

"Just needed your uncle Sam to turn that frown upside down" I teased, Colby climbing into the diver's side.

"Dats what Papa says!" She giggled.

The car ride back consisted of us having small talk, Gemma overly excited to see Sam, practically dragging him throughout the apartment.

"I wish I had her energy" I muttered, Colby and I trailing behind the two energetic blondes.

"You're doing alright through, right? I know you said this morning your head was hurting"

I nodded, "I'm fine. I took meds. I forgot how annoying prenatals are though"

"It'll be worth it in the end, remember?" He smiled at me and I nodded.

"I mean, we get to take our meds together now" I grinned, Colby rolling his eyes as he unlocked the door.

Gemma immediately dragged Sam to her puff jar, explaining how it was empty because she already got her prize.

"Hey Aaliyah" I greeted, entering the kitchen and immediately noticing the full wine glass. "Wine? Again?" I cocked an eyebrow, confused why she was drinking at 1pm on a Wednesday. "Did the job interview not go well?" I asked, concerned at how she was slumped at my kitchen counter.

"Joe's a piece of shit" She hissed, surprising me with her tone.

I slowly approached, setting my phone on the kitchen counter.

"Joe as in a person, or Joe's as in the café?"

"The interview fucking sucked! I went in and she was all, you're late and I was all, haha LA traffic am I right? And she wasn't fucking having it, like it's my fucking fault I got stuck in fucking road construction! And that was the tip of the damn iceberg! She proceeded to basically be like, you're not skilled enough to take orders, run a register and give people their correct orders! Like it's fucking hard or something!" She complained, her arms flailing out of fury. "She basically insinuated that all I could be was a dishwasher! Which doesn't make as much money and if I wanted to do damn dishes, I would just stay fucking home!"

I just nodded slowly. "I'm sorry it went poorly. Did you apply to LA Fitness?"

She shook her head. "It fucking sucks! I was doing just fine before I uprooted my life for him and he had the fucking audacity to dump me! Like I was the damn problem!"

Before I could reply, Sam and Colby strolled in, Colby opening the fridge.

"Are you guys down to do pizza night? My treat" Sam offered and Colby immediately looked over at me, and I knew what was running through his head.

I shrugged, not sure if I'll have the same reaction this time, Colby slowly nodding.

"What was that look for?" Sam asked, looking between the three of us.

"What look?" I asked a little too quickly, Sam narrowing his eyes. "Where's Gemma?" I quickly changed the topic.

"Cleaning her room" Colby replied, confusing me.

"Willingly? She didn't throw a temper tantrum?"

"It's incredible what powers uncle Sam has over her" Colby laughed, Sam having a smug look on his face.

"What can I say? She loves me best" He playfully teased, Aaliyah scoffing, getting us to look over at her as she shoved herself away from the counter and left the room.

"What's her issue?" Colby asked quietly and I sighed, shaking my head.

"She's had a bad day"

"So she's being a bitch?" Colby shot back and I glared.

"Don't call my best friend a bitch"

He shot his hands up in surrender, "Okay, sorry"

The next few days Sam and Colby were busy working, but on one of their free days of that week I also had off, Sam and Colby inviting me to go shoot an explore video with them.

"Say hi to the explore club!" Colby filmed on his phone as I slipped on my shoes.

I flipped off the camera, Colby laughing.

"Leighton's moody" He told the camera, ignoring my eyeroll.

"Want to tell them why I'm moody?" I asked, grabbing my phone off the charger.

"Oh my god" He groaned, "Okay, listen-"

"Here we go!" I laughed, talking over him.

"Shut up. Don't listen to her!" He laughed, extending his arm so we were both in frame, Colby playfully shoving at my face as I laughed. "I'm kidding, I love you baby" He leaned over to kiss me as I laughed, but I happily accepted his affection. "Okay, this is why she's pissed at me-"

"I wouldn't say I'm pissed at you"

"Do you just want to tell the story?" He laughed, my face turning crimson.

"No, you tell it! I'm sorry!"

"Oh my god! Okay, it's not even that deep! We got up this morning and she wasn't feeling well and debated if she was even coming with us today, long story short she woke up moody; grumpy if you will. Very cute might I add. She strolled out of our bedroom looking drop dead gorgeous wrapped in her blanket that she's liked to sleep with lately-"

"G brought it to our bed one night and I've held it captive" I jumped in, a silly smile on Colby's face. "What?"

"You're cute"

"Stop!" I squealed, hiding from the camera as he laughed at me.

"I love you" He laughed, making my smile widen.

I fucking love his laugh.

"Anyway! I made breakfast as I've been doing lately. I put a ring on her finger and all of a sudden I've became the wife in the kitchen making pancakes and shit-"

"He's getting so good at pancakes!" I chimed in.

"You better not get sick of my pancakes. It's the only thing I can make"

"I'll try not to. As long as G loves them, I'm sure they'll continue to be a household hit"

"Anyway, she wanted M&M's right? She was craving like candy and shit and we try not to keep too much in the house because G is getting to that age where she likes to sneak things, so Leighton came into the kitchen into our hiding spot to find the hidden candy gone"

"Honestly I felt like my soul died a little" I noted, Colby trying not to laugh at my misery.

"Anyway her candy craving hasn't gone away, and I told her we could get some whilst we were out, but that answer wasn't good enough so now she's annoyed at me"

"You make me sound like a bitch. I'm sure the girls understand when that craving hits and you had it, and go to get it, and it's gone. Sam, and my best friend are in the house so who knows who stole it" I explained, Colby side eyeing me. "What?"

"It might've been me" He confessed, my jaw dropping.

"Cole Brock!" I scolded, Colby trying to keep a straight face.

"I'm sorry! I got hungry last night!"

"YOU LET ME CONFRONT SAM THIS MORNING! HE TOOK THE BLAME! COLBY!" I exclaimed out of disbelief.

"It's like saying the dog ate your homework"

"Oh my god I need to apologize. Where is he?"

"I think he's taking a shit"

My head cocked, speechless before shaking my head and leaving him be, Colby laughing as he stopped the recording.

Whilst in the car on the way I apologized to Sam for my monster like behavior, Sam declaring he and Colby had to stick together.

The entire adventure was annoying.

Not because it wasn't fun, but because it was really hot and I already felt like shit, so when we got back to the car covered in sweat, I demanded my M&M's and water, Colby apologizing to me since I did end up throwing up in the woods.

"Maybe we should get you those nausea bracelets?" He suggested and I groaned.

"You did this to me"

"I know, I'm sorry" He apologized, both of us completely forgetting that Sam didn't know shit.

"Oh my god you guys are pregnant" His eyes went as Colby and I quickly looked over at him.

"Shit" Colby muttered and I let out a huff of defeat, nodding.

"Oh my god! Congrats you guys! I can't believe you're doing this shit again. Oh my god I'm so sorry we took you on this fucking hike! If I'd known I wouldn't have suggested going back to Devils Gate!"

"I mean, gotta stay active, right?" I smiled, trying to stay positive whilst I feel like dying.

"Who knows that you're pregnant?" He asked and I ran my hands over my face, grimacing at the sweat.

"Aaliyah"

Sam's brow furrowed, "Just Aaliyah? When are you guys going to tell people?"

"I've been wanting to tell you for weeks man!" Colby complained, my jaw dropping.

"Hey! I said if you wanted to tell him you could. I just.. I didn't want to tell too many people too soon"

"Oh shit.. so I shouldn't have posted about it on Instagram?" Colby asked, his face looking alarmed.

My heart sank to my ass, "What?" I spoke out of concern and disbelief. "You better be fucking joking Colby. I'm only 9 weeks! Please tell me you're joking" I quickly looked between Sam and Colby, both of them holding straight faces until I saw Colby's lips tug upwards against his will. My eyes closed out of annoyance as my head tilted, taking a deep breath before looking back at him. "You piece of shit I swear to god"

"Your face! That was so good!" Sam started to cackle.

"I'm sorry baby, I love you" Colby laughed, his hand reaching back for me but I slapped it away.

"You're a piece of shit lately I swear to god" I shook my head. "Didn't you learn when I was pregnant with Gemma to be nice to me?"

"It was a joke!" He laughed, but I didn't find it very funny which made him sigh. Colby turned to Sam, "She's afraid of miscarriage, so she doesn't want to tell anyone yet"

"Ah, I see. Well, Leighton" Sam cranked his neck to face me in the car, "I'm expecting to be the godparent this time. Let me know what I need to fill out, what I gotta do" He joked, but I could tell there was some weight to his words.

"If I had it my way you would've been Gemma's god parent. I would've loved to have Aaliyah and you be the godparents, but sadly Gabriel is her father, so chase it was" I replied sarcastically, Sam cocking a brow at me.

"Not a fan of him?"

"Gabe's friends.. and me.. aren't the best of buddies I guess. His girlfriend Penny is nice though" I shrugged, Sam nodding.

We arrived at my parents house, a milkshake and M&M's in hand, Colby holding Gemma's milkshakes as he held the door open for us.

"Dad?" I called out, slipping my shoes off before walking throughout the home. "Dad?!" I called out again, the boys following behind me. "Dad?" I tried again, climbing up the stairs.

I checked Lexi's room, Gemma likes to play in there sometimes, the room empty. Landon's room was also empty, along with my old room.

I knocked on my moms door, Colby quietly asking if maybe they're outside, softly twisting the knob.

My lips pouted when I saw Gemma curled up into the side of my mom, my hand held to my chest as I looked back at Colby, Colby slipping his phone out of his pocket to take a photo.

He showed me the photo, nodding when I asked if he'd send it to me.

I took in their position, my Mom laying on her side with Gemma curled into her chest, my mom's hand resting on the back of my daughters head, a blanket pulled up to my daughters chin.

Where's my dad?

Colby and I left the room, walking back to the living room where Sam was sat, joining him on the couch.

We talked with Sam for a moment when I heard the front door open, my head whipping around to see who was walking in.

"Lexi?" I called out, watching my little sister freeze. "Hey" I said calmly, offering a quick wave.

"Uh.. hi" She muttered, slipping her shoes off and dropping her purse next to them.

"Fancy seeing you here" I teased, Lexi glaring. I dropped my façade, getting up off the couch. I walked over to her, Lexi jolting forward as I slipped on the hardwood, quickly catching my fall.

"Shit" Colby hissed, jogging over to me. "Are you okay?" He asked and I nodded.

"Socks and a wooden floor don't mix" I chuckled, my heart beating a little quicker from the unwelcome surprise.

"Please, be careful" He asked, Colby's firm grip on my hips keeping me steady.

He let go of me, Lexi watching us as I continued to approach her.

I opened my arms, offering her a hug, Lexi eyeing me.

I raised my eyebrows, tilting my head as I waited for her to make up her mind.

She apprehensively walked into my hug and I wrapped my arms around her, feeling her squeeze me in our hold, repaying the favor.

"I've missed you" I murmured into her ear, "I love you" I continued, feeling her tense under my hold. I went to pull away before softly smacking the back of her head, Lexi gasping.

"Hey!" She yelled.

"You deserved it! You've been ignoring me for months!"

"I've been busy" She whined, rubbing the back of her head, my eyes rolling.

"Stop being such a baby. I didn't even hit you that hard"

"That shit hurt!" She complained, my eyes once again rolling at her being a baby.

"It was a love tap!"

"You're such a bitch" She grumbled, shoving past me.

"I'm a bitch?! You're being an asshole!" I called back, Lexi walking to the kitchen.

I followed her, Lexi opening the fridge, grabbing a pitcher of lemonade.

I watched her for a second, taking in her appearance.

Her black hair was now blonde, her makeup appeared heavier than I was used to seeing, her shorts ending mid thigh, her tank top showing a bit of cleavage.

"Hey, are you okay?" I asked, my shoulder leaning against the archway.

"I'm fine" She muttered, putting the pitcher back.

"When did you dye your hair?" I asked, my eyes scanning her appearance again.

"A month or two ago" She replied, not looking at me.

"Yeah? Looks good" I nodded, pushing off the archway, moving to lean against the counter, goosebumps rising on my arms after leaning my forearms against the cool countertop.

"Thanks" She murmured.

"Things going okay?" I asked, trying to figure out why she was so timid.

Lexi was normally in your face, laughing and yelling, wanting your complete attention, and now she won't even look at me.

"Yeah"

I hummed, hearing the floorboard creek behind me, Colby walking into the kitchen, taking a seat at the barstool, sliding my milkshake over to me which made me smile.

"Awe, thank you" I grinned, happily sipping from the now melting drink.

"You're welcome" He smiled back. "Love you"

"I love you too. It's melting, but if I down it, I'll regret it"

"Hey Lex" Colby looked over at her, "How's Brennen?"

"Fine. Dealing with family stuff"

Colby nodded and the room fell silent, the three of us focusing elsewhere until the door next to the fridge opened, my dad walking in front the garage.

My dad's eyes widened when he saw the three of us here before cleaning his throat and setting a grocery bag down.

"What do I owe the pleasure of seeing three of my kids in my kitchen?" he asked and I smiled, walking over to hug him.

"We came to get Gemma" I explained, my dad patting my back, "And she was asleep with mom"

"Yeah they were out cold when I left" He nodded, turning to look at Lexi, "You're always welcome, but why are you here?"

"Came to visit mom" She said and I glanced at my dad, feeling sorry.

Twenty minutes later I heard the soft thuds of my daughter's footsteps before she ran over to Colby, a big tired smile on her face.

"Coco!"

"Baby G!" He grinned, his hands going under her arms, pulling her into his lap. "Momma, Sam and I got you a present"

"Willy?!" Her eyes went wide as she turned to look at me.

I got up and grabbed her milkshake from the fridge, passing it over to her.

"What do you say bug?" I coaxed, nodding towards Colby.

"Fank You!"

"You're welcome baby"

"What do you think? Aaliyah got me them" I smirked, my hands cupping my breasts where the skeleton hands were, shaking my boobs.

"Mm, I approve. Look at you" He hummed, scooting off the bed.

"She said I should wear things like this more whilst I'm pregnant, show off my bump I guess" I chuckled, looking down at where my mid-drift was, noting the bit of bunched up skin where the shorts pressed in.

"I can definitely get behind that. It shows off your gorgeous thighs, and your boobs look great in it" He complimented, his hands sliding down to my thighs, brushing over the recently shaved skin.

"I don't like this" I grabbed the fat, pinching it.

"No one does, but you look beautiful Leigh"

"You know how google said you show quicker the second pregnancy?" I asked, Colby nodding, his hands exploring my skin. "When do you think I'll show? I'm already fat, how long do you think it'll take to notice the bump?"

"You're not fat Leighton"

"Tell that to this extra flub!" I grabbed it again, shaking it.

"The extra flub makes you adorable. We've all got it" He pinched his own stomach, showing me his excess weight.

"I like your happy trail" I brushed my fingers against the soft hair, Colby shivering which made me laugh, his hands squeezing my hips, pulling me into him as he kissed me, his face full of confusion when I pulled away, until I dropped to my knees.

"Leigh-" He started, my fingers hooking into his pajama bottoms. "You don't have to— oh" He groaned and I smirked, kitten licking his tip before taking him in my mouth.

I hummed to try and prevent gagging, taking him as deep as my throat would allow, listening to his soft groans and grunts of pleasure, Colby reaching down to let my right boob fall out of my top as he tweaked with my nipple, my moan sending vibrations on his nerves.

Within a few minutes he was spilling down his shaft, my hand working up and down as I leaned down to clean up the mess, Colby groaning.

"It's so hot when you do that, holy shit"

I used my thumb and pointer finger to clean up around my mouth, getting up off my knees.

"Happy?" I snickered, Colby nodding as his hands cupped my face, kissing me.

"What was the blowjob for?" He asked, his hands moving the hair away from my face.

I shrugged, "Just love you"

"Yeah? I love you too. Are we showing that in sexual favors tonight?" He smirked, my cheeks becoming warm. "Is Leighton Rae horny?" He teased, earning a glare, only for the warmth to spread up to my ears, giving me away. "Why didn't you say so" He laughed, "I'd be more than happy to nuzzle my tongue into your pretty cunt if it means I get to listen to those beautiful moans of yours"

"Stop! It's not funny! Pregnancy hormones are a bitch. You don't have to return the favor, I just wanted to do something nice"

"You act like it's a dreadful job to pleasures you" He laughed, tugging me into him. "I don't know if you recall... but I'm pretty sure we both loved impregnating you" He hummed, leaning down to kiss my neck.

"You've got to stop calling sex that" I muttered, rolling my head back, allowing his assault to go further.

"Your best friend-"

"Aaliyah"

"Lives with you, right?" April asked, Gemma and Noel practically running down the candy aisle.

"Yeah. She's trying to get her own place, but she's struggling to find a co-signer and she won't let Colby and I help her" I briefly complained, hearing Gemma babble momma over and over again as she ran up to me, a bag of Reece's in her hand.

"Momma peas!" She shook the bag.

"No Gemma, no candy" I shook my head, her eyes narrowing.

"Peas?"

"No ma'am. You can get crackers or chips, but we're not doing candy"

"Peas!" She whined, her blue eyes beginning to water.

"You know the rules lovebug"

"Peas!" She tried again, but I held my ground which landed pitiful tears to roll down her face ending in a full blown tantrum in the middle of the aisle.

"Just wait it out" April spoke in a hushed town, my eyes darting around me, looking for any judgmental eyes as my toddler cried.

The second Gemma crumbled to the floor, I rushed over towards her, afraid of her accidentally injuring herself.

She thrashed in my arms wailing, my heart racing at the fact that she might hurt herself, and that we were in public.

"Gemma Lorraine, please stop and listen to mommy" I tried to reason, not wanting to raise my voice in the store, but I got ignored as she shrieked, shoving herself away from me.

Not knowing what to do and feeling extremely embarrassed, I just sat down in the aisle staring at her.

She gasped to breathe which immediately alarmed me, my whole body shooting up and rushing over to her.

"Hey hey, it's okay! Breathe. In... Out" I exhaled, Gemma's eyes wide as she continued to gasp for air, tears rolling down her face as the gasps turned to wheezing. "Please baby girl" I worried, trying to calm my own panic as I watched her struggle, feeling extremely helpless.

I pat her back as she coughed, looking over my shoulder at April who had her back to us, focused on Noel.

Flight, Fight or Freeze was kicking in and I could feel something take over me, pushing the panicking away as I focused on my daughter.

"Sit down, look at mommy okay? It's okay! You're okay" I reassured, her glossed over eyes cracking my heart.

I grabbed her hand, hating the scared look on her face. "Feel this?" I inhaled, placing her hand on my chest, Gemma nodding as gasped again. I exhaled. "Copy momma" I repeated it, placing her other hand on her chest. "In... out. Breathe Gemma, come on. Good girl" I exhaled, hearing the wheeze as she inhaled, anxiety racing through my veins.

"Is she okay?" I heard April ask and I quickly shook my head, picking Gemma's small frame up into my arms, cradling her against my chest as she cried.

"I need to take her to a hospital. I don't know what's happening" I rushed out, grabbing my bag out of the cart.

"Okay, let's go then" April nodded as I rushed towards the exit, my hand rubbing her back.

April drove whilst I sat in the back with Gemma and Noel, Gemma appearing to be breathing easier, but still more shallow than normal.

My brain flipped through it's mental files of what it could be, going through any family history, anything she could've ate, all the way down to her having poor lungs as a baby and being on oxygen and I couldn't figure it out.

Was it like a panic attack? Was it her lungs struggling to get air from crying?

"It's okay G, we're going to go see the doctor and they'll make you feel all better" I reassured her, wiping the tears off her sweet face.

My heart sat in my stomach the whole way there, my leg bouncing as I constantly watched her face, listening to her breathing.

I replayed the entire event over again in my head.

April and I talking, Gemma running with Noel before running back to me. Was she breathing fine then? Her asking for the candy as I brushed her off telling her no to her sobbing on the ground.

She was breathing fine before she was crying, wasn't she?

She was fine.

I would've noticed if she wasn't fine.

She had to be fine. She was my little girl. I would've noticed if something was wrong?

I couldn't shake the guilt that was sitting in my chest as I continued to reply every moment, cursing at myself for not paying closer attention, and ignoring her as she cried.

Was this my fault? Could I have prevented it?

"Ma-ma" She struggled, my head whipping back to her.

"Yes baby? It's okay. You don't have to talk bug"

"Co...Co" She gasped out, my eyes widening.

"It's okay. I'll call him, okay? Shh"

I heard her do another shallow inhale as I dug around for my phone, my hands shaking as I messed up my passcode, eventually getting in and finding his contact under "Most Recent"

It rang and rang and rang, feeling like it was never ending.

"Hey babe, I thought you were hanging out with-"

"We're taking Gemma to the ER" I spat out, looking back over at Gemma and then at Noel who was busied by April's phone.

"What?!" He shouted, making me wince. "What happened?! Is she okay?" He rushed and I heard a door creak open.

"No" I replied with a sharp inhale, Gemma's little hand squeezing my own.

"What happened?!"

"She's struggling to breathe"

"She's struggling to breathe?! What the fuck? Leighton! Oh my god I'm on my way. The ER closest to our house right?" He rushed out, sounding out of breath.

"Yes"

"Holy shit, okay. Sam and I are on our way. Call me when you get there, I'll be there in 15"

"Okay" I whispered, feeling my eyes sting.

The call dropped and I looked over at Gemma, a tear rolling down my face.

Memories of her as a newborn with an Oxygen tube flashed through my head, Gemma learning to walk, her being all smiley and giggly with Colby all the way to her playing with Logan at my parents went through my head as I saw her lip quiver before she coughed, scaring the shit out of me.

"It's okay baby, we're almost there" I reassured. "Coco's coming. Mommy's here. It's okay, I love you bug"

I replayed the moment at the store once more, not finding anything out of ordinary.

What the hell happened?

* * * *

I won't make you guys sit through a lengthy pregnancy lol. There is more to this book than her being pregnant, it won't be like Unbroken lol the baby is born before the book ends

Written on: February: 20th, 21st, 24th, 26th, 28th 2023

Published on: February 28th 2023

Word Count: 6659

Part Seven

#colbybrock #colbybrockwriting #colbybrockfanfiction #colbybrockimagine #colbybrocksmut #samandcolby #samandcolbywriting #samandcolbyfanfiction #wattpad

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