#i mean he is a bit crazy

[bulbabutt]

Raphaella Meets His Match

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7

raph 🤝 mona getting in way over their heads

[secriden]

Watching Joong's Hurt Me Please MV with the context of how episode 6 ended and how this is likely a song about Fadel's thoughts and feelings about Style after Finding Out, I wanted to take a deeper look at the lyrics.

I have transcribed the English lyrics on Youtube side by side with a fan translated version (credit: bl_zonee on Twitter) just because there's different shades of meaning between them that I find really interesting and I'm curious which one is the more accurate translation or if both are valid, but just give different nuance. (Perhaps a mutual who understands Thai would be willing to give some insight? *u*)

Verse 1 makes a lot of sense to me: Fadel must be wondering how Style could be so cruel ("unkind" / "heartless") because every instance of Style being honest and asking for honesty in return, all of Style's genuine desperation to bare his heart to Fadel in episode 5 and 6, now looks like a calculated, cruel deception.

And after being so afraid to reveal his secret to Style for fear that it would make Style walk away from him, there's a painful irony in Fadel now wishing Style had walked away before. Because the betrayal hurts so much more now that Fadel has given in to his heart.

The chorus is where the nuance between the translations gets interesting.

The Youtube version seems almost like Fadel is taunting Style, putting up a front that he can take the pain Style is dishing out and more. It's like he's hiding behind the bravado of being able to handle the hurt, and even more.

The MV also depicts Style smiling sadistically after slapping Fadel, as if he's enjoying the pain he's inflicting. Meanwhile, Fadel looks up almost in adoration, a strange softness in his eyes at odds with how cruelly he's being treated. The knowledge of Style's betrayal has turned Style into a monster in Fadel's mind, one which he cannot help but to still have soft, affectionate feelings.

But the fan translation sounds much more hurt and accusatory. Fadel is expressing his pain and anguish much more plainly and "you did this to me" is a line that demands responsibility.

In both translations, though, the last line ("can't get enough" / "enjoying the pain") gives us a hint that Fadel isn't willing to give Style up even now. Despite the pain, despite feeling as if he's simultaneously burning up and drowning, there's a part of him that still wants this. That still wants Style.

Interestingly, as Fadel sings the last line he begins to visibly struggle against the rope tying him to the chair. The soft look vanishes and in place is a determination and shadow that spells trouble for Style. The shock is wearing off and Fadel is starting to fight back.

Verse 2 is where the agony really hits, for me.

In both versions, Fadel recognises the way Style's love was (maybe still is?) precious to him ("your love feeds my soul" / "your love nourished my heart"). But because Style's love is a lie, it's transformed into a weapon ("poison"). It twists Style's love into a source of "hurt" to Fadel.

Which is why I think both versions have a line where Fadel admits that there's a part of him that wants Style to keep hurting him -- or rather, to keep loving him; because these are the same thing to Fadel now -- ("hurt me, make me feel used" / "the more I was hurt the more I enjoyed it") whilst also remaining accusatory ("the more I loved, the more sorrow/I suffered").

The lines about "nothing left to write about our love" / "our story" also feel very pointed and final. A closing of a chapter; a closing of the possibility of their former, uncomplicated happily ever after. Style has nothing left to write (report) back to his superiors (the police) because Fadel's love is already complete and his deception has reached the inevitable conclusion of Fadel being found out/destroyed.

All this happens while we see Style continuing to threaten Fadel with a golf club and an almost crazed expression of glee juxtaposed with flashes of Fadel and Style in much happier times.

Also the fact that this line comes with this scene where Fadel lets Style kiss him despite “knowing” it’s all a lie *sobs uncontrollably*:

The first chorus comes back once and the music reaches a plateau. We are clearly preparing for a drop or a modulation and we get exactly that (twice!) with the second chorus:

Here, both versions converge: Fadel is angry, he's furious. Style hurt him and he's going to repay all of it and more ("you'll hurt [by much more]" / "you must suffer more than I did"). The lyrics tell us that, while Fadel cannot take back the hurt (take back his love), he can certainly ensure he isn't alone in the suffering (this love will also hurt Style).

It is at this part where my heart sank as I realised that Fadel's "I think I love you" line in episode 6 now takes on a much more sinister tone.

Because I think that discovering Style's betrayal was also what made Fadel realise the truth of his love for Style; the very agony he was in was the sign that Fadel's heart was lost to him. But even as it is true, I also think he still made the choice to ruin Style in the same breath. Because if Style could use Fadel’s love as a weapon then Fadel is going to use it (Fadel’s love) to hurt Style too.

A decision was made in this moment, and everything Fadel does afterwards in this scene is deliberate.

There is, however, one piece of hope:

Despite Fadel's expressed fury, what the MV shows us is Fadel breaking out of his bonds, shoving Style back and punching him once and then:

For all his anger, for all his rage, for all his threats of manifold vengeance, what we see is Fadel pressing close and kissing Style; once on the lips, and once on his chest (heart), all while the lyrics makes space for one last plea:

("don't betray me")

For me, its the way the line is shown together with this direct visual parallel between the ignorant Fadel in the past (left) and the Fadel of the present who has seen through Style's deception (right) that I find particularly compelling. Even now, even at the point of Fadel discovering Style's betrayal, there is still hope for forgiveness.

Because Fadel cannot help himself. Because Style made Fadel's bleeding heart whole again; and it beats, it feels, and despite how much it hurts, what Fadel still wants more than anything else in the world -- desperately and simply -- is Style.

[pepperpixel]

SAID HE LIKES CRAZY GIRLS,

BUT HE HATES WHEN I ACT CRAZY,

IT TAKES TWO TO TOXIC!

FINALLY!!! Finished these pics of jinx I’ve been working on!!!!! HOLY SHIT, these took so long…. But finally… they’re done… pls enjoy this art of my beautiful princess w a disorder. Featuring alternate colors for the big pic and also a closeup! Cuz I rlly like how both the lines and coloring on her face turned out… like the pink gradients w her eye… her deer in headlights expression,, like uve just startled a raccoon digging thru ur trashcan and r two seconds away from getting mauled.. m proud of it!

[dhmis-autism]

been listening to his villain arc playlist.... i love my boy being evil and getting everything he wants ok? ok...

[viveela]

If you draw dip i woul be sooooooo happy

So I like to imagine Damien likes to fill in Pip about what happens back on Earth

[the-toybox-general]

AHHHH I've been playing Digimon Cyber Sleuth on and off again and I FINALLY digivolved my starting digimon ( Palmon ) all the way up to Rosemon !!! I wanted to sketch them for that reason... it took way longer than expected...!! But for that reason it feels like a big achievement!

This is specifically supposed to be my Rosemon ( His name is Squire ) but I think I could design him to have more of his own cool unique details as an actual Digimon oc !! So this is Squire... for now !!!

[d8tl55c]

oh boy !! ! ! ! !!! ! thANK y0u all for the kind words on my last art posts. you all get it and i was/still am so happy about it

as promised, here's some close-ups of the comic for image quality's sake, and other screenshots i rescued from the community whiteboard (and something else)

first up another sketch of mystery gender-ambiguous being. (please send me more name ideas for them if you got one- i like to hear em! (reminder it's the side character that appeared for <10 seconds in AvM Ep. 30))

a few fav scenes

emotional support cwab

they weren't meant for this purpose exactly, but i do have countless "fluffy sticks" loose in my notes and homework sheets from the school years.

papery critter.

even when i wasn't confident in fur or feathers, they helped me practice posing and create some satisfying gradients/flowing poses. (im a sucker for good tail poses) (oh yay! i found a good pic...)

and finally, little sneak peak for you for reading so far ;3

i realized that whiteboardfox is pretty great for my working needs. simple and to the point and all. feels nice with the mouse and the tablet.

so i started hashing out a big project idea just to see if it holds up and

[

several hours later ...

]

oh

oh man

it's a little bigger than i expected

<next>

[good-beansdraws]

The shovel is still tossed away in the house somewhere, but he doesn’t want it. He digs with his hands, swift but careful, reverent of what lies beneath. The soft earth crumbles easily under his fingers. Soon enough, the skull is staring up at him, its empty eye sockets a strange echo of Python’s own.

From @luce-speaks 's incredible ghost au fic, Laid to Rest ! There were so many moments I wanted to draw, but this one really stuck in my brain and I wanted to bring it to life (pun intended)

other versions

[hajihiko]

IVE TALKED ABOUT THIS A BAJILLION TIMES but I just cant get over it

He literally says Ride Or Die Bitch

[mookmayor]

i dontg know if tumblr messes w fallout oc stuff but oh well. go my fartballs

[scribesynnox]

gOD the way Undead Unluck starts off. Like, ha ha, okay, whatever, let’s get the obligatory ecchi scenes out of the way.

But like, then you read and learn more about Andy and it’s like. Oh. Yeah, the manga starts off with a naked dude chasing after an 18 year old girl and trying to fondle her tits. But then you learn about his history and it like oh.

Andy didn’t care.

He like, really, didn’t care about anything other than himself in the beginning.

Or rather, more accurately, he cared MORE about himself than what some random brat would want.

He has spent hundreds of years all alone, always watching his friends and their family live their lives, have kids, achieve dreams, grow old, and die. And he is always left behind, never able to join them.

He’s suicidal. He’s depressed. He does not give a shit. He’s just chasing for feeling SOMETHING by trying to die in different ways, and if he can get that by touching some girl, then heck yeah, he’s gonna do exactly that.

Like, he has standards and calms down about touching her after a while, but in the beginning? He didn’t care, and it sucks because it’s clear that he does care. He cares a lot and when you see his history, you KNOW the dude wasn’t always like this. But he is just so tired of being alive. He doesn’t have anyone. He’s alone, he has no hope for his future. Victor had Juiz for all those billions of years, but Andy had no one, and that’s a big difference between the two. Victor always had Juiz from day one, but Andy didn’t meet Fuuko until like 200 years later, and it’s like.

Yeah, ha ha, okay, whatever, obligatory ecchi scenes out of the way, but also. That is a man who got tired of caring about anything other than himself. That’s a man who lost hope and was in despair.

And now he’s regaining the energy to love and care again and it’s just!!!!

This manga is gonna make me cry.

[pup-pee]

i compiled every time tiny kyle changed costumes bc it was driving me insane

[batsplat]

Thailand 2019: Valentino Rossi provides his take on Marc Marquez's superiority that season. Then, Marquez is asked about Fabio Quartararo's prospects and Rossi comments on whether he will congratulate Marquez for winning the championship.

[youreyeson1y]

how i think the last skz meeting went:

jyp: okay so jisung just dyed his head blue, felix is back to black and hyunjin just became bald.

jyp: so who's gonna be the blond one now?

skz: ???

jyp: yknow? THE blond? y'all have had a blond for so long, skz feels incomplete without a blond member. so, who's it gonna be?

sunshine twins: well, we just dyed our hair

chan: i'll be wearing a beanie anyway

changbin: i just recovered from the green, i ain't gonna dye my hair for a long time now

minho: but my hair is so long and lucious and healthy now 🥺🥺🥺

jeongin: i had a light colour during ate

seungmin: 😃

jyp: ok...

hyunjin: whatever, i don't even have hair anyway at this point

[seriema]

when sophia said "i want to be free..." when romeo said "maybe this is what freedom feels like." when both of them thank p for the mercy of death. you understand.

[kazamajun]