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catty-words · 2 years ago

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Oh! The mustache thing and David. Okay, okay. It still feels kinda weird to say someone is racist over this, but yeah, now that you point it out I see it. I had a childhood friend who got in a foreign exchange student program for a year in high school and when she came back she told us how since the gringos couldnt say her name properly they just defaulted to calling her "Brazil" 😑

I feel a bit called out about twitter, even if its true and I'm only there cuz I'm an addict being held hostage. I've also curated my fandom experience, but I was really needing more info and saw stuff that bummed me out while researching 🥲🥲 I dont mind seeing people criticize characters cuz like we are all entitled to our opinion even if I disagree, but I guess it kinda shocked me still. I guess I forgot about how in some ship wars I participated in when I was 13 some people would call the other characters rapists and stuff after being away from typical fandom toxicity for so long lol.

About the tone shift: yeah I did, but it didnt feel "drastic", just different. In a bad way. Like one of the first metas I read talked about how Devi lacked autonomy in season two and I was like YES THAT WAS WHAT I WAS THINKING even thought not really I was just "wait why is this feeling a bit off... weird... let me play the next episode and just hope is merely a vibe" I dont hate season 2 as much as you seem to, however season 1 and 3 are indeed superior. Season 3 is my favorite out of the three because I really like how the characters matured. A favorite episode is probably 1x10, like the scene of Nalini with dr. Ryan moves me, then Ben driving cackles me up, then I back to being moved by them spreading Mohan ashes with beautiful day playing, then boys like you as "you stayed" and benvi kiss and paxton calling and back to the kiss and I'm like OMG WHAT IS SHE GOING TO DO I HAVE CLASS TOMORROW AND ITS ALMOST TWO BUT FUCK I NEED TO KEEP WATCHING THIS. I always feel like that when I'm rewatching even if it's not two am and I dont have class the next day lmao

You are going to think I'm super horny but probably "why don’t you show me the bitty spark you’ve been saving for his mattress?". It's the one I reread the most after all. The awkwardness of the situation?? Their great characterization??? Devi having no idea of what to do with Ben of all people making her feel like that??? Fab and Eleanor still unsure about him at school and being cutely protective of Devi??? Ugh, just kill me already (please dont)

"you're gonna fall (but i'll catch you)" is also great! I love to read adults au for shows about hs characters and hs aus for shows about adult characters idk why but there are not enough adult aus for nhie in my opinion and yours is my fave!!! Plus Ben being so into stories is adorable as someone who really sees herself in Abed Nadir. Plus the way is not just about their romance but also Devi dealing with grief and her complicated relationship with her mother and self destructive tendencies and... ugh I just love it.

It still feels kinda weird to say someone is racist over this, but yeah, now that you point it out I see it. - i think the disconnect comes from the way fandom uses words like 'racist' to build cases about how it's Objectively Wrong for anyone to like a certain character, whereas the word itself applies to a whole spectrum of behavior and morality. like, it shouldn't actually be that uncomfortable to admit that ben can be and is sometimes racist, he is a walking definition of privilege. him internalizing racist sentiment should hardly be surprising. but it also doesn't make him irredeemable scum. he's obviously a really caring character, as well.

on a related note, yikes @ those students who committed micro-aggressions to your childhood friend. as they get further and further into their life, may they reflect and do better rather than double-down.

I dont mind seeing people criticize characters cuz like we are all entitled to our opinion even if I disagree, but I guess it kinda shocked me still. I guess I forgot about how in some ship wars I participated in when I was 13 some people would call the other characters rapists and stuff after being away from typical fandom toxicity for so long lol. - i get it, i get it. for me, there need exist a gaping divide between exposing myself to critical or even harsh reads of characters i love and/or identify with for the sake of refining my own read of the text and giving the time of day to people who aren't engaging sincerely with the text. protect yourself in the echo-chamber!

About the tone shift: yeah I did, but it didnt feel "drastic", just different. In a bad way. - VINDICATION

but jfgdf - I dont hate season 2 as much as you seem to - i feel compelled to clarify that it's not that i hate season two, not really. it's more that the season let me down and then, by nature of netflix shows' release schedules being what they are, forced me to sit with that disappointment for over a year. it's that i love season one SO MUCH, i couldn't reconcile how much i didn't vibe with season two. on paper, you're right, the tone difference is not drastic, but the emotional response it elicited in me definitely was.

and I'm like OMG WHAT IS SHE GOING TO DO I HAVE CLASS TOMORROW AND ITS ALMOST TWO BUT FUCK I NEED TO KEEP WATCHING THIS. I always feel like that when I'm rewatching even if it's not two am and I dont have class the next day lmao - i love you for this, and 1.10 is such a valid choice she really is That Bitch

You are going to think I'm super horny but probably "why don’t you show me the bitty spark you’ve been saving for his mattress?". - first of all, embrace the horny within. it's important to the show that you do, we're in the spirit of the source material here! second of all, this choice makes me really happy because i love that fic and generally speaking, people are a little shier about giving feedback on smut but, like, that's hands down some of my best writing (both for d/b and more generally). so. thank you.

Fab and Eleanor still unsure about him at school and being cutely protective of Devi??? - you may already know that i'm writing a long-form follow-up with 'bitty spark' acting as the prologue since it sounds like you picked through my blog a bit and i feel like i never shut up about the sequel BUT ANYWAY one of the best parts about it is ben finding himself enmeshed in the girl squad, if i do say so myself. (x)

I love to read adults au for shows about hs characters and hs aus for shows about adult characters idk why but there are not enough adult aus for nhie in my opinion and yours is my fave!!! - okay, well now i'm going to think about you every time i read an adult AU for a high school show or a high school AU for an adult show.

thank you for fueling my vanity and for stopping by my askbox in the first place!

#anon #replies #i guess i'll put this in my general show tag?#never have i ever

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fungalscourge · 1 year ago

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thoughts

ep 200 of tma is so fucking anticlimactic

trying to be quiet at night is crazy bc all of a sudden regular ass activities will induce ear shattering decibels why is pens deafening me rn

god i love smoking but i hate smoking im so congested all the tymeeeee 😵‍💫 but the world is evil so we stay partying ifg .

i really dont fw new year’s resolution but i do believe in the distinction between years and the power that holds and boy i am excited to leave 2023 behind this messy miserable year kicked my ass and i just want peace 2024 i believe in you and i want to be better. i want to cook more and make art every day and move and stretch and dance and walk and run and swim and sing and figure out how to sing alongside my dropping voice although it hurts i continue to find myself i continue to find truth and love and confidence in places i didnt expect and as much as they hurt and haunt me and have left very real long term scars i have learned so many lessons from so many people this year and i know it comes from a privileged and naive place to expect things to magically get better but i have hope for change and for the dedication towards it to drive me, at whatever pace that ends up being. i can only control what i can and its not worth worrying about things i dont have volition over. i want to grow plants (of many kinds 🥰🤫) and i want to NOT fucking become an alcoholic once the shackles of youth have lifted at long last. there is no turning back now ! ! i am curious to see how my journey unfolds and i hope to see my behaviors align more with that of someone who actually wants to stay alive and do the most that they can with the little time theyve been given

man adhd is crazy i keep oversleeping and not taking my meds but when im medicated im so normal so thats also a big goal is taking meds more consistently omg that reminds me…

i got a new beautiful big sketchbook and im all scared to use it which is why im rambling and i opened the sketchbook bc i paused TMA bc imhalfway through the final episode and dont want it to be over i hate the empty feeling after finishing a media ive been intaking for a while

does the feeling that youre forgetting something ever go away? its been lingering ever since high school . my nose is running . i know to anybody else this is probably boring but im actually the most interesting person in the world. thats not true. but im interesting enough. more than plenty of the creatures out there, i guess. oh my back hurts. liquid veins liquid lungs liquid lies gooodnight

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buckyjustbelikethat · 5 years ago

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The Fiction of Fairytales: Prologue

Title: The Fiction of Fairytales: Prologue

Characters: (eventual) Stucky x Reader

Summary: (a/b/o au that is non-cannon compliant) After being captured and forced to live as Brock Rumlow’s mate for years you are kidnapped by the Avengers. They plan to interrogate you for information on Hydra and Rumlow, but after Steve and Bucky realize they are your true mates, they realize that their kidnapping was more of an unexpected rescue.

Warnings: Mentions of assault, kidnapping, and abuse.

Word Count: approx. 1400

A/N: Why is it becoming a trend in my multipart series that the first chapter takes place between tony and the reader. Anyways, this part is very angsty and not fun, but there will definitely be fluff and romance coming in the future. I hope you guys like the beginning! 💕

As a kid you dreamed of finding your mate one day. Your parents had a beautiful relationship, you grew up watching the adoration in their eyes when they looked at each other and you wanted that. They seemed the most relaxed and at peace when you all were together. You didn’t know much about what your parents did, and to this day you still don’t, but at the age of 16, you learned that whatever it was that they did, they had made themselves an enemy of Hydra. You were having a movie night, all three of you watching the most recent released Disney movie. You sometimes imagine yourself there in the days that followed, praying that your mind could conjure those moments in the present rather than remain cruelly unreachable memories. But they are gone now, and you weren’t sure if you would ever know true peace again.

Hydra had invaded your home, and killed your parents. This is when you had begun to wish you never were an omega. Maybe if you weren’t, you never would have been taken that day. You would have gone with your parents, and your life would have stayed blissful up until the moment of your death. Unfortunately, when the Alphas that had invaded smelled you they decided to take you. The head of the group that attacked you was Brock Rumlow. He had decided you would be his before any of the other Alpha’s could get their hands on you. Though that didnt mean he had stopped them in the future.

For the past 8 years you were Brock’s omega, not by your own choice. You had tried to escape him a few times and soon you realized the pain when they caught you again was worse than staying. It was pointless to try and leave. Brock had all of the resources of Hydra and you had nothing, and since your parents died, you had no one.

The faith that you previously had in love that was demonstrated and proclaimed by your parents seemed like a fairytale. Most importantly a fictional reality you were not given the privilege of having in your own life. You only knew pain from alphas, not just your bonded mate Brock, but his alpha friends he would invite over to your place.

In the beginning Brock kept you locked in the cold basement, chained up most of the time due to your many escape attempts. But at some point he had broken you physically and emotionally, and he knew it. That was his goal, to not be able to see beyond the life he had given you. You were expected to please him in all aspects. You were his to command in any way imaginable, he had convinced you over the years that he only asked what was expected of every omega, convincing you that even if you left you would never be safe from your presentation. You were now able to sleep with him in his bed, though that was probably the last place you would want to be. You were given free reign of the home, mostly so you could keep it to his expectations and serve him. He even allowed you to go to the grocery store, though you knew he was watching you at all times, he would know when you left and if you didn’t make it back within what he considered a reasonable time or you talked to too many people you were punished. You were punished for just about everything, and sometimes just because it was what he felt like doing at the time.

Most people in hydra knew about you. Brock took you to all of the public events, and he would often make sure to not harm you in any visible places leading up to whatever event he wanted to show you off at. Not that anyone at the party would care about his abuse, hell most of them had, at some point, had a part in it, he just wanted you to look more attractive. Though he never complimented you, too focused on making you feel worthless, you knew from others that your scent and appearance was enticing, and you wished that it wasn’t the case.

Brock was having people over tonight, and you were expected to go to the grocery store. He didn’t give you the luxury of knowing who it was, you only wished to know what to expect, whether or not Brock would expect you to please whatever company it was. But like normal you were left in the dark, you only knew how he expected you to prepare and what food to make. Over the years you felt like you had gotten really good at cooking, though you weren’t allowed to have much of the food you made, he would tell you it was too good for you. He would either give you scraps or make you prepare something bland to eat for dinner.

You were picking up the ingredients as quick as you could at the store, despite the pain you were in from the morning. Brock had gotten mad at you for something minimal, you had looked at him in the eyes on accident, which was one of his least favorite things, and he had beaten you. Though you were sure you had a few broken bones, you were used to continuing on through the pain, he did not tolerate anything else. You thankfully had gotten used to the layout of the store since it was the only one he would allow you to go to, so you were able to make your trip as short as possible. It was the closest one to your house, and you imagined that at some point he had someone hack into the cameras.

After you loaded the bags into your car, you got into the drivers side only to scream when you saw a figure behind you.

“Hello, I’m sure you know of me, at this point everyone does, and you’re going to listen to my directions.” It was Iron Man, and though you weren’t too familiar with him, you had heard of him enough to know that he was an enemy of hydra, or that hydra was an enemy of him, you didn’t know which one was more appropriate. He almost didn’t need to point his weapon at you, he was wearing his whole suit as if he imagined you were some kind of threat, and you wouldn’t stand a chance even if he wasn’t wearing it, especially with the kind of pain you were in. Based on his threatening position in your back seat, and the fact that he smelled very much like an alpha, you assumed this was no rescue. Whatever it was, you hoped it would even be the slightest bit better than how Brock treated you. Maybe he would even give you the gift of killing you, then all of this would be over.

You looked at the cameras and noticed that in his position the car next to you blocked them from being able to see him.

“Don’t even bother looking, your mate isn’t going to save you. You’re going to put the car in drive and follow my instructions.”

You were too fearful to argue with him calling Brock your mate. Sure he technically was, but you had no choice in any of it. You originally had dreams of only bonding with your true mate, but that’s all it was, just dreams.

You didn’t respond. You had learned over the years to only speak when necessary, and you had a feeling Stark wasn’t going to listen to anything you had to say anyway. So you put the car in drive and followed Stark’s instructions. “You know you need to get out more, we’ve been following you for a while and you only go to the grocery store if you aren’t with your mate. I gotta say, that’s a little weird.” You didn’t know what to say, unsure if an honest reply would really get you anywhere.

“So, you aren’t much of a talker either I’m guessing, that’s fine, as long as you answer our questions when we get to the tower, I don’t care how much you talk.”

So, that’s why they wanted you. They thought you could give them information on Brock, or hydra. Maybe when he realized you were of no use to him he really would kill you.

Next Chapter

#stucky #stucky x reader #alpha stucky x reader #alpha bucky barnes #alpha steve rogers #bucky barnes x reader #steve rogers x reader

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ggukcangetit · 5 years ago

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Dreamcatchers 4

Pairing: jungkook x oc

Synopsis: DI Jeon didn’t need a new partner. Unfortunately, his superiors felt otherwise; especially considering the extremely high-profile murder that had just taken place in the port city. Recent transfer, DI Choi Yuri finds herself confronted with a new cityscape, unfamiliar people, a hostile partner, and a homicide that is certain to bring back unpleasant memories.

Genre/AU: fluff/action/mystery | detective! au | police!jungkook, police!oc

Word Count: 4.4k

Rating: NC-17

Warnings: mentions of violence, alcohol, blood, drugs, death. Basically stuff you’d associate with a murder mystery/crime drama

Previous: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5

Acknowledgement: shoutout to @stutterfly for designing this beautiful banner which i am completely in love with and stare at for no particular reason throughout the day. also a big thank you to @kinktae for helping get through a really tricky bit in this chapter :*

A/N: reminding everyone that this story features a named oc because i’m still very unfamiliar with writing second person reader inserts. i’m not aiming for strict accuracy in this story, and all criminal investigation/forensics knowledge i have has been gathered by watching crime drama/procedural dramas! my knowledge of geography is also not totally accurate so apologies for that. once again, one thing right by @hobios prompted me to write a police inspector! jungkook story. would highly recommend reading that because it’s probably one of my most favorite pieces of writing!

Time: 4.37 am

Yuri had spent the entire night researching Park Jimin. Right from where he went to school up to all the scandalous newspaper articles recounting every aspect of his personal life. Priding herself on being able to maintain a professional outlook in her investigations, Yuri couldn’t help but feel appalled by what she had found. Park Jimin appeared to be arrogant, sleazy, manipulative, privileged, and everything that she despised in a person. Yoongi’s words rang in her head as she contemplated dropping the idea of acquiring a blood sample from the prodigal son of Park. No, this wasn’t because of her last case in Seoul. That was not why she was backing off. This was simply because she had no patience to deal with the self-absorbed antics of a privileged 20-something man.

Closing one of the last tabs, she caught sight of a familiar face. Not familiar in the way that you recognise an old friend, but familiar like a phrase you hear and cannot for the life of you remember where it was from. Park Jimin was seen exiting a famous restaurant in downtown Busan and beside him was another young man, so extraordinarily eye-catching in his loose trousers and green cardigan in a way that only an exquisite piece of art is.

An exquisite piece of art…

That was it. That was the phrase that made it click in her head.

“He’s literally a piece of art!”

“I mean, yes, he’s definitely conventionally attractive,” conceded Ahreum, a little annoyed that her photography was almost completely being ignored. “But what do you think of the pictures?”

“‘Conventionally attractive’? Is that the best you can do with your Literature & Creative Writing degree?”

Of course! This was Ahreum’s friend and Instagram muse.

Yuri snatched her phone from it’s charging spot and quickly scrolled through her friend’s Instagram. Sure enough, Park Jimin’s friend in loose trousers and green cardigan stared back at her from various parts of Busan, his expressions varying only slightly but creating completely different moods throughout Ahreum’s profile.

Kim Taehyung…

xxx

Yuri checked her phone for the fifth time in the last 3 minutes. Ahreum was supposed to pick her up at 8 am. It was currently 8.02 am. Not that it really made much of a difference, but she was raring to go ahead with her plan. A plan she had no doubt could easily blow up in her face, but weeks of fitful sleep coupled with shots of sugary coffee had given her a weird adrenaline rush which she didn’t want to lose.

A couple of minutes later, Ahreum pulled up outside her apartment, her large bike contrasting heavily with her petite person.

“Still don’t see why I couldn’t drive to the place,” muttered Yuri, putting on the large helmet with artistic paint splatters all over.

“The plan was to corner Jimin, and you can’t do that in your car which has a fucking police sticker right at the back.”

Yuri frowned. “Your plan was to corner Jimin. I just wanted to talk to him. And -” she fixed her bag across her body and put both hands on Ahreum’s shoulders - “I kept the sticker for parking privileges. I can take it off whenever.”

“Whatever. Just hold on tight,” said Ahreum, revving up the bike.

4.5 minutes later, they had reached their destination. Yuri knew that it had been 4.5 minutes because she had been fervently counting the seconds to distract herself from falling off the vehicle

“WHO drives like that? Are you totally insane?” she managed to get out, her hands fumbling on the straps of the helmet.

Ahreum gave her a sheepish grin. “Sorry, timing is essential in this case. Tae had texted me that they had reached just before I left from my place. We don’t have a lot of time. So I ugh-”

“Whatever. Let’s just get on with it.” Yuri tucked the loose strands of hair behind her ear, and mentally rehearsed everything she was going to tell Jimin.

Unfortunately, fate had other things in mind, because as soon as they opened the door to the diner, a familiar face (which most definitely should not have been there) spotted them and came over.

“Fuck.” Ahreum pulled out her phone and frantically sent Taehyung a text before the entire plan went down the drain.

“Yuri? Ahreum? What are you two doing here?” asked Seulgi, her long brown hair looked freshly washed and smelt of flowers.

A: why didnt u warn me that s was here fuck fuck fuck

T: i didnt see her… look it wont be that big a problem will it

A: pls tae the last time she saw ur boy they almost set fire to the library

T: shit ur right… umm maybe she-

Ahreum paused her frantic texting as soon as Seulgi came over to them. She gave Yuri a quick nod and decided to wing the situation as best as she could.

“Seulgi! This is incredible! I can’t believe we ran into you like this!” Ahreum hugged the taller girl. “I wanted Yuri to try the breakfast here so we decided to drop by before she had to get to the station. This is really incredible, I was planning to call you today actually. It’s almost time for me to choose my specialization and I wanted to-”

Yuri took this chance to slip off, as Ahreum steered Seulgi outside the diner. She didn’t really know why Ahreum was so intent on Seulgi and Jimin not meeting, but she trusted her best friend’s reasons.

Looking around, she saw that the large table near the window was occupied by the people she had been looking for. Kim Taehyung and his best friend Park Jimin. The latter had his back towards her, and as she approached she saw Taehyung’s eyes fall on her. She gave him a small wave, gesturing towards her phone’s lockscreen - a picture of her and Ahreum.

His face lit up in recognition as he stood up to greet her. “Hello! I’m Kim Taehyung. I thought Ahreum would be with you.”

“She’s umm…” Yuri glanced towards the doors of the diner through which Ahreum had led Seulgi out. “She’ll be here in a bit.”

“DI Choi, that’s not really true,” Jimin turned towards her, his eyes cold and alert. “Taehyung, your friend is diverting dear Dr. Ahn before she could see us and sabotage their poorly constructed ambush of me.”

Taehyung’s mouth hung open slightly, not really sure what was going on. “DI Choi? As in Choi Yuri? As in Ahreum’s best friend from school?”

“Yes,” said Yuri, feeling extremely awkward. She had expected to get two words in before Jimin caught on, but it seemed like she had severely underestimated him. “I’m sorry Ahreum didn’t tell you what this meeting was about. These aren’t the most favorable circumstances for us to meet. Nonetheless, I’ve heard a lot about you and it’s a pleasure to finally meet you.”

Taehyung bowed in response, but his expression was still uncertain.

“What brings you here, DI Choi?” asked Jimin. “I doubt it was because you were dying to see me again. But -” he stood up and leaned towards her ever so slightly - “I wouldn’t be opposed to the idea if that were really the case.”

Not for the first time, Yuri realized how powerful Park Jimin’s presence was. She could see him becoming a very successful CEO with how he commanded people’s attention. However, she couldn’t shake off the uncomfortable feeling his gaze elicited. It was like she couldn’t predict what he was going to do next, much less fathom what was going on inside his head.

“Mr. Park,” she said, sitting down on one of the sofas in the booth. Taehyung and Jimin followed suit, but this time, they were both seated on the same side. “I’m afraid this isn’t a social call. I’ve come to talk to you about the ongoing investigation regarding the death of Kang Eunwoo.”

“I believe I answered all of your questions last time,” said Jimin, narrowing his eyes. “In fact, I believe I answered all of DI Jeon’s questions. You didn’t have much to say, as I recall.”

Taehyung’s head snapped towards his friend. "Jeongguk? You were at the station? Why didn’t you tell me, Jimin? What’s going on?”

“You and I both know that you didn’t provide much information. But that’s not what-”

"I don't think I was really required to answer any of your questions, DI Choi. Linking me to a rival company heir's death without a shred of evidence - " he leaned forward once again, his silver bangs falling over his forehead - "Some would consider that harassment. That would mean my lawyer would have to become involved. And neither of us want that, now do we?"

This is harassment. You really don't want to know how I deal with any kind of harassment, DI Choi.

Yuri took a deep breath, trying to ignore the words that kept her up almost every night.

"Your cooperation is highly appreciated, Mr Park," she continued, placing her hands on the table. "However, in order to save you from any further harassment, there is something you could help us out with."

Jimin did not respond immediately, giving Yuri the time to continue her, frankly, insane idea.

"We would require you to provide a blood sample. Which would help us eliminate you from the investigation. It shouldn't take up too much of your time - just a short visit to the station, and you'd be free of us."

Yuri waited for a response - anger, disbelief, frustration - anything really. What she didn't expect was laughter. Full on hysterical laughter. In fact, Taehyung was probably not expecting it either because he kept glancing at his friend worriedly.

"You are truly remarkable, DI Choi," said Jimin, once he had calmed down. He wiped a lone tear from his left eye, the many rings on his fingers glinting in the sunlight. "After everything that you've witnessed, you really thought you could somehow convince me to provide a blood sample? Sweetheart, I have 10 years worth of DNA that the police have been trying to get a hold off. Do you really think you'd be able to convince me when you weren't even able to get an alibi out of me?"

Yuri's face fell slightly, her mind grappling with ways in which the situation could be salvaged. It was at this point that Ahreum came over, looking distinctly more worn out than when they had arrived at the diner.

"Ahreum." Jimin turned his attention to the other girl. "You have such an interesting friend. Are you sure she's from Seoul? I didn't think such naivety could survive in the capital. Much less in law enforcement."

Ahreum frowned, snatching up the glass of water in front of Taehyung and gulping down the entire contents. "Stop being a dick for once in your life, Jimin."

"I love when you talk dirty to me." Jimin winked at her.

"Cool it, Jimin," said Taehyung, his expression no longer confused and worried. "Ahreum, what the fuck is going on?"

Ahreum looked at Yuri, not sure how she could help with the situation. Apparently, things hadn't gone well while she had been diverting Seulgi. "I'm sorry, Tae. I don't know anything other than Yuri wanting to meet Jimin."

"But you knew it had something to do with an investigation," said Taehyung, his handsome features creasing. "Why didn't you tell me that your best friend Yuri was a detective? That doesn't seem like information to just leave out."

Ahreum looked at him guiltily. In Taehyung's eyes, he was the only one who had no idea what was going on, and he felt both hurt and betrayed by her. This entire plan had been a train-wreck and to make matters worse, Seulgi had returned to the diner because she had dropped her keys inside.

"What the hell?" Seulgi stood at their table, her eyes narrowing disapprovingly. "What're you doing here, Park?"

"Hello to you too, darling," said Jimin, leaning back into the sofa lazily. "It's been so long since I've seen that beautiful face of yours."

"So." Seulgi turned towards Ahreum. "Are you really interested in going into forensics? Or was it just a way to distract me so that I wouldn't run into him?"

"Seulgi, I-"

"Darling, they were just trying to convince me to provide a blood sample," interrupted Jimin, his face curling into a smirk. "Was that your idea? You know I would've said yes in a heartbeat if you had asked nicely."

"Fuck you, Park!" spat Seulgi. She turned to Yuri and shook her head. "This isn't how I thought you'd get things done. I can't believe you're bargaining with a murder suspect!"

"Now that's a bit harsh, isn't it darling?" Jimin was enjoying the situation immensely.

"Jimin, don't." Taehyung warned his friend.

"Seulgi, please, this isn't what you think-" Ahreum ran out after the taller girl, the diner eerily quiet after the blowout.

"Jimin, you can find your way home yourself, right?" asked Taehyung, getting up to swipe his credit card at the counter. "I have to go."

Jimin nodded, his fingers lazily running through his silver hair. It was a wonder all the rings didn’t get caught in his hair.

"And Yuri - " Taehyung paused, his long fingers clenching around the plastic of the card - "It was nice meeting you, I guess."

"I think that went rather well, DI Choi" said Jimin, once they were the only two left at the table. "I was thoroughly entertained."

Yuri pinched the bridge of her nose, feeling a headache coming on. "My apologies for wasting your time, Mr. Park. Have a good rest of the day."

Once outside, she realised that Ahreum had left. Her mode of transportation had left. Without letting her know. She sighed and unlocked her phone, trying to figure out if it would be easier to walk back home or to the station.

"Were you abandoned as well?"

Yuri took a deep breath, preparing herself before facing Jimin once again.

"Friends these days aren't what they used to be."

"I don't know you, Mr. Park." Yuri crossed her arms and tilted her head to one side. "I have no preconceived notions, and I have no affiliations in this place. I am merely doing my job - trying to find out how Kang Eunwoo died. I don't really understand why you're trying your damned best to make things difficult for us. But let me tell you one thing- I'm not going to stop until I get to the truth."

Jimin seemed at a loss for words for the first time since she had met him.

"If you didn't have anything to do with Eunwoo's death, providing the blood sample should be nothing more than a formality for you. But by declining to assist us, you're pushing us into thinking you do have something to hide. I don't know about you, Mr. Park, but if I were involved in a murder investigation, I'd like my name cleared as soon as possible. All personal conflicts aside."

xxx

Back at the station, Yuri felt her head was going to explode. She hadn't eaten anything the entire day, her morning coffee forgotten in the chaos of the diner mission. On top of that, her desk had a large pile of papers waiting to be read.

"Goh dropped these off when he came in," said Jeon, noticing how she was staring at the pile. "Just procedural stuff - it's pretty much the same everywhere in the country. But each station requires anyone who joins to read through them and sign."

"Oh, I see -" Yuri stopped abruptly, her head spinning towards her partner. He had never managed to go two words without snapping at her, much less initiate a civil conversation. Why was he suddenly behaving like this? Was this some kind of trap? Was he baiting her?

Jeon seemed completely unaware of Yuri's internal dilemma, and continued typing on his work laptop until his phone pinged with a message. He quickly closed the laptop and walked towards the exit, already speaking to someone on the phone.

Yuri glared at his desk, trying to figure out what he was playing at. Gradually, her eyes landed on that wretched file. The 2nd Nov case file. The file that seemed to be Jeon's purpose of existence.

The 2nd November case that Jeongguk’s been overseeing - I want you to go over it. You might be able to help

Yoongi's words rang in her head. She began reaching over the partition that divided her desk from Jeon's, her hand was just a few centimeters from the file-

"Need some help?"

Yuri jumped in astonishment, Jeon's voice startling her into knocking her knee into the desk. She ignored the throbbing sensation, and focused on trying to explain herself.

"Need a pen to sign the papers. Mine's out of ink."

Jeon seemed to buy this reason, and picked up a pen from the large stack sitting inside a pale red mug on his desk.

"Anything else?" he asked, when her eyes kept flitting back to his desk.

"N-no." Yuri sat down hurriedly, sifting through the papers she hadn't looked over even once.

The next hour went by without much incident. Yuri had managed to grab a dodgy looking sandwich from the break room, and somehow finished it off in between large gulps of water. Never again was she leaving the house without eating.

Her texts to Ahreum had gone unanswered so far, which was hardly surprising. Yuri was pretty sure she was trying to explain things to Taehyung. It was best to give her some space at this point - she'd call and check on her later at night.

Jeon's phone rang again causing him to rush out once more, and from the fragments that Yuri managed to catch, it was Chief Inspector Goh on the other line.

"DI Choi?"

Yuri was stunned to see Park Jimin standing by her desk.

"How can I help you, Mr. Park?" she asked, after a moment's pause.

"I'm here to... cooperate."

"You're agreeing to the blood sample?" she asked, incredulously.

"Yes."

Yuri cursed under her breath. It was lunchtime, which meant that Seulgi and most of her team would be off.

Suho happened to be passing by at just that moment. "DI Choi, can I speak to you for a moment?"

"S-sure. Mr. Park, please wait here for a moment."

"You managed to convince Jimin to provide a blood sample?" asked Suho, lowering his voice.

"I guess so..."

"The labs are closed for lunch right now."

"I know." Yuri bit her lip in frustration. "I don't know how long he'll be willing to wait. It's already a miracle that he's showed up."

"I think I saw one of the junior lab technicians come back early," Suho wondered out loud. "Let me call him and ask."

Yuri waited as Suho dialed the number on his phone. In the meantime, Jeon had returned, his eyes catching sight of Jimin and temporarily halting him in his tracks.

What followed next was one of the most stressful 3 minutes of Yuri's life. Jeon was speaking to Jimin, when Suho informed her that the junior technician was available to draw a blood sample but would not be able to stay long enough for the sample to be handed over to either his senior or Seulgi herself. This was a definite issue because according to the station's protocol, junior lab technicians were not allowed to officially check in anything related to an ongoing investigation. It seemed like Yuri would have to wait at the lab until Seulgi or a senior technician came back, so that the sample would not be left alone until it had been properly entered into the system. The only problem was, Jeon appeared to be packing his stuff and Yuri's window to grab the 2nd Nov file was closing. This would've been the perfect moment, given that he was slightly distracted due to his conversation with Jimin. Suho seemed to sense the conflict raging within her, and offered to wait at the lab instead.

"Are you sure?" asked Yuri, her attention fixed on the file still on Jeon's desk.

"Yes," said Suho. "But I think you should tell Jimin that I'll be taking him to the lab instead of you. He'll probably take it better if it’s coming from you."

Yuri nodded and walked over to where the two men were having a conversation.

"- a bit annoyed that he didn't know I had been down here." Jimin chuckled and ran a hand through his hair.

"Why didn't you tell him, then?" asked Jeon, frowning. Yuri took this opportunity to swipe the file from his desk.

"Ah! DI Choi, I was beginning to think you had forgotten about me," said Jimin, his eyes falling on Yuri.

"Sorry for making you wait. Unfortunately, I have some urgent matters to attend to. DS Lim will take you to the lab and make sure everything is alright." She hid the file under her coat, and beckoned for Suho to come over. "Thank you once again for your cooperation, Mr. Park."

Jeon raised his eyebrow questioningly, but Yuri was out of the station before he could get a word in. She didn't have much time before he realised his precious file was missing.

Once inside her car, Yuri opened the file and read through every single inch of it. It was a grim case no doubt - a single mother had been stabbed to death by a homeless drunk, who was assumed to be the father of her three year old daughter. The girl had been missing since then, while the man awaited his trial in jail.

The pictures were quite awful. The small nook where she had been living told a rather tragic, almost pathetic, story. A young woman without many choices. Her pale, lifeless body only added to the sense of despair. Yuri wondered why Jeon was so obsessed with this case. Sure, it was terribly sad, but not unlike many other drunken brawls resulting in an unfortunate death. She wondered who was in charge of looking for the girl at this point. According to the file, no body had turned up in over a month. Which meant that she was either alive or her body would probably never be found. If the former was true, there was a high probability that this was a kidnapping. It didn't make much sense. Maybe there was something she was missing...

Staring at the picture of the woman's corpse, her eyes caught sight of a small detail - a ring. A ring which looked very familiar.

Sifting through the pictures, she found a close up of the ring in question. It had been lying near the body and it was assumed that the ring had fallen from her person at some point during the struggle.

Only...

Yuri took out her phone and quickly snapped a shot of the picture of the ring. This was absolutely against protocol, but she was desperate at this point.

It had been 20 minutes since she had run out of the station, and after making sure that Jeon had left, she made her way back in and dropped the file at his desk.

xxx

"Did you clear things up with Taehyung?" asked Yuri, sitting down at the table.

Ahreum picked up some pasta with her tongs and placed it on Yuri's plate. Tonight's dinner was in honor of Namjoon making it home before the clock struck midnight.

"Yeah, he's not one to hold grudges. He was just a little upset that I had lied to him."

"He looked quite betrayed when he realised that we had set them up like that."

"Don't worry about it." Ahreum shrugged while pouring wine into the glasses. "He's fine now."

"Tae can't stay mad at Ahreum for too long." The deep voice sounded familiar yet strange to Yuri, who had barely interacted with Ahreum's older brother when they had all been living in the same city.

"Namjoon!" she stood up, giving him a hug. He was still awkward with any kind of physical affection, though he had grown into his limbs and no longer resembled a gangly teenager. "Took me 4 days but I finally managed to get a glimpse of you."

"Ah," he said, pushing his black-rimmed glasses up the bridge of his nose. "Sorry about that, Yuri. I had a major project due last night so I was basically living at the library doing research."

"Well, I hope it's not going to be as difficult to meet you from now on. You and Ahreum are the only people I know here."

"No new friends yet?" asked Namjoon, digging into the pasta. "Ahreum, this is delicious! We should've called Seokjin over. He always appreciates good food."

"Seokjin? As in the guy who runs The Moon's Post Office?" asked Yuri.

"The one and the same. How do you know him?" asked Namjoon.

"Happened to visit the bakery on my first day here. He's got quite a way with shortcrust pastry."

Namjoon laughed at this. "I'm sure he'll be happy to hear that. That place is Seokjin's pride."

"But back to the friends question," he continued, grabbing another helping of pasta. "Detective work not leaving you much time to socialize?"

"Sort of..."

"She's been having trouble with her new partner," piped up Ahreum, her eyes glinting mischievously. "Maybe you can help her out on that front."

"Oh? Who's your partner?"

"Jeon Jeongguk."

"You're not getting along with Jeongguk?!" Namjoon nearly spilled the wine on himself.

"Namjoon, please calm down. It's not that serious," said Ahreum, rolling her eyes.

"Sorry," her brother murmured, placing the glass back on the table. "It's just... I know you both. There's no reason for you to not get along."

"He's being a dick," supplied Ahreum, helpfully. "Not sure why. Doesn't sound like the guy you're always gushing about."

"I don't think 'gushing' is the right word... but I get your point. Has he said anything to you, Yuri?" asked Namjoon.

Yuri didn't hear what Namjoon had said. Her attention was fixed on her phone, specifically on an email from Seulgi. The blood on Eunwoo's sleeve was a match for the sample taken from Park Jimin earlier that day.

xxx

another chapter done!

#jungkook #jungkook fic #jungkook x oc #jimin #taehyung #seokjin #namjoon #hoseok #yoongi #bts fic #btsbookclub #c me write bangtan

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sargentr · 5 years ago

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so i reread the dream thieves a while back and i wrote down some stuff i hadn’t really noticed/paid that much attention to. some of them are mere observations others are just me. Fangirling. as one does:

* ronan's first love was his family

* adam tried his best to make things work with blue, just like everything else he had tried in his life

* gansey is very well aware of his privilege and wealth

* ronan has two weaknesses: niall lynch and adam parrish

* noah was there for ronan is ways not even ronan realized

* when ronan was filled with anger for a reason i cant remember, he relaxed a bit when gansey, beside him, answered his phone and said "hey" into it, meaning it was adam. (this is from ronans pov) like!!! theyre so comfortable around each other can i leave

* adam was so furious at gansey for thinking he had made the st agnes bill easier for him that he didnt realize that it had ronan written all over it

* gansey was such a light hearted and carefree person that there was not a single person in aglionby who did not know who he was. it is described that while others tried to fit in aglionby, aglionby fit perfectly in gansey. he was the type of person who the teachers would hold for a second after class to show him the article they thought he might like. HE’S BABY.

* gansey and ronan's relationship was not based on communication.

* adam always thought how beautiful all of gansey's things were.

* ronan lynch was one of those things

* gansey often reminded himself how niall lynch's death affected ronan

* ronan would rather die than kill adam

* the image of ronan trying (and lying) to take his life was scarred into gansey like ink

* gansey and ronan fought a night creature and fit perfectly as a team (gansey's pov)

* clue number two of non heterosexual ronan niall lynch: "(blue) wore a dress ronan thought looked like a lampshade. whatever sort of lamp it belonged on, gansey clearly wished he had one. ronan wasn't a fan of lamps."

* ronan lynch is completely and utterly himself the first time he steps foot in the barns

* RONAN REFERRING TO ADAM AS EINSTEIN

* ronan has no chill whatsoever omg when they're in the barns and checking to see if the animals are still alive blue asks ronan to check some of them and he replies to her and adam "you two poverty twins do it"

* confirmed: ronan lynch is a complete cupcake (eg: pressing the small mouse to his cheek to check the heartbeat)

* confirmed: richard gansey is a bigger cupcake for smiling ear to ear while doing the same

* !!!! "and it was his smile that buried ronan"!!!! (referring to gansey and the mouse)

* "... adam replied, his henrietta accent sneaking out, betraying his fatigue. it was something deeper." (ronan's pov)

* second confirm: ronan lynch is a Softie™ (eg: when they were about to leave the barns but ronan whispered so just gansey heard "can i go and see mom?" HE IS ALSO BABY

* OKAY BUT GANSEY AND RONAN THIS ENTIRE BOOK: "i remember when you used to smell like this" referring to when they enter the main house at the barns.

* "ronan loved it so much. he nearly couldn't bare it. he wanted to destroy something." (((this is about the barns. protect this sunshine)))

* when blue saw a picture of a bird in the barns and asked, "are these vultures or crows?" and adam and ronan replied at the same time, "vultures" "crows" NERDS

* "i am being perfectly fucking civil" still to this day, the best thing ronan lynch has ever said.

* "ronan looked at gansey. that look, blue thought. ronan lynch would do anything for gansey" claps slowly

* BONUS: "i probably would, too." thought blue

* matthew lynch was the only thing that made ronan come back himself

* niall left ronan (and only ronan) his entire property

* gansey shops when he's sad

* gansey and adam sharing a LOOK when orla comes in with skin showing

* blue had very few skin showing and gansey wanted to tell he how much he liked hers and not orlas, but then thinking "that's adam's job" what a bean

* how extra can ronan lynch get (a series): making a complete SCENE while opening his car door, sitting inside, closing the door, driving away

* gansey protesting so blue wouldnt go inside the water (bc baby boy probably couldnt handle blue seminaked) and using "you wont be able to see without your eyes getting irritated" as a point

* gansey getting all flustered and reminding himself he'd been looking at orla's naked body for so long but also: HER BIKINI IS SO ORANGE

* clue number two of non heterosexual ronan niall lynch: laughing his ass off about ganseys reaction of orla and said orange bikini

* jealous little blue being furious at gansey for just looking at her

* ronan's pulse fastening when thinking about kavinsky

* ronan smiling to himself and only doing so because there was no one to see it

* noah and blue holding hands at monmouth when gansey and ronan arent there okay look at those two

* "sometimes i pretend im him" "which part?" "alive" PROTECT NOAH CZERNY

* when blue was laying on ganseys bed she though "i have a crush on richard gansey" and the following "i dont have a crush on adam parrish"

* okay but the whole kissing scene is adorably cute and the best part of tdt

* BLUE THINKING "oh, this is what i can't have"

* MATTHEW AND RONAN VISITING THE BARNS AND BOTH OF THEM JUST BEING ADORABLE WITH AURORA AND EACH OTHER

* ronan racing kavinsky and having so many mixed feelings

* adam feeling misplaced in DC and constantly thinking of this fathers abuse and I Cried

* adam and gansey fighting and uhhh sorry dick but DAMN adam

* ronan dreaming he's in kavinskys car and not knowing if he loved it or hated it

* blue's voice over the phone taking gansey's mind off the fight he had with adam

* gansey listing the things ronan is inside his mind so he would be angry at him

* "ronan had charm. it was just buried deep. very deep."

* blue fucking sargent being the badass feminist she is when it didnt occur to adam that maybe blue was into politics

* "you wouldnt have gone someplace without gansey. you two make a grand couple. kiss him!" blue giving zero fucks to adam being douchely sexist

* okay first fuck you adam idiot parrish: "nice blue, gansey was right. you are a raging feminist" FUCK YOU

* okay adam losing his temper and literally thinking of hitting blue this is a matter of EMERGENCY

* ADAM STOP BEING A DICK OH MY GOD HE ALMOST FORCED BLUE INTO KISSING HIM THIS ISNDHDJDHDHD

* like ok i get Mans had a rough past n that violence is the only thing he knows but stief what was ur POINT with this part

* adams enemy being his anger. someone protect him from himself

* when blue and gansey are talking in the pig about adam and ganseys just full of hatred towards adam's parents, "who has he ever had to love him? ever?"

* okay but richard campbell gansey the third is a complete and utter SUNSHINE: when he's overwhelmed by blue and gets out of the pig and starts pacing and then realizing it was rudeish and APOLOGIZING like a fucking KING

* lmao gansey saying "i think he should come to terms with his sexuality" at kavinsky gift to ronan.

* "he wondered if kavinsky was gay. he wondered if she should go to the fourth of july party. he wondered where adam had gone" someone just. keep ronan close and hydrated and healthy and LET HIM BE GAY AND REST

* okay but ronan thinks about kavinsky in a matter that is completely and utterly non platonic

* "the grey man gently threw ronan across the breakfast table" nice maggie

* prepare for dialogue:

"theres nothing here k."

"theres only us. i know what you are"

"thats not enough"

"dont say dick gansey man. hes never gonna be with you. and dont tell me you dont swing that way. im in your head"

"thats not what gansey is to me"

"you didnt say you didnt swing that way"

RONAN SAID, "no, i didnt" ..... gay bitch

* ronan calling adam "adam" when he thinks they're in a dream and just then realizing he isnt

* "i know it was you. the rent, i figured it out" adam parrish just slipping information at the WRONG time

* "he was a brother to a liar and a bother to an angel, son of a dream and son of a dreamer" still to this day the prettiest thing ever

* HIS SECOND SECRET WAS ADAM PARRISH

* "adam furrowed his brows to ronan, as if sensing ronan's eyes on him. ronan looked away"

* im shook this book is so good

#blue sargent #trc #the raven cycle #the dream thieves #bluensy #gansey #adam parrish #noah czerny #ronan lynch #pynch #richard gansey

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awildeel · 5 years ago

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A day in the life of a GVI Volunteer

Back in the early noughties the BBC aired a documentary series called The Big Cat Diaries, and it changed my life forever.

Whilst following the story of cheetah Kike and her nine month old cubs, I fell in love with the species and had been dreaming to see them in the wild since. So, after a year of working and saving I booked on to GVI.

Why GVI? They had a specific Cheetah programme with the opportunity to walk with these beautiful cats. So on the 29th of June 2019, I boarded a plane and was just an 11 hour flight away from my childhood dream.

After around 20 hours of travel I landed in Hoedspruit and along with a couple of other volunteers on the same flight, we were greeted by the base staff, loaded onto the mini bus and (after a few hours of waiting for other volunteers) we were off to base! On our way we saw our first glimpse of the African savannah, with an elephant visible in a reserve we passed on the way!

If you’re wondering what my typical day was like as a GVI Volunteer, please, read on!

A typical day:

4:50am Alarms would start going off in the dorm and people would start to roll out of bed. I always liked to set mine for 5 minutes earlier so I could beat the queues to the bathroom. Cereal would be consumed, you’d get dressed in the dark so as not to disturb people not out on drive and probably end up with your shirt the wrong way round...then get out to do your morning duty**.

5:30am you’re all sat in the truck waiting for that one person whose always late, although we never did leave anyone behind there were a few near misses.

And so the drive begins, its dark, freezing cold and most of us wore 2 blankets or more, coats, jumpers, scarfs, hats and gloves! My feet were ice blocks before we were even off the base. But the hope and awe of what you might see whilst out keeps you awake and excited. The spotlight is gliding across the sides of the road and everyone’s praying they highlight some eyes.

I can’t say we ever saw much with the spotlight. The best spots would have been a porcupine family and a civet, but it was mostly bush babies and sleepy impala. Most of the drive in the dark is just covering ground to get to the north of the reserve, where the cheetah boys usually hang out!

7am. As the sun starts to rise, we stop for coffee (my favourite spot was over the hippo lake) and discard some layers. As soon as the sun hits you suddenly feel silly for wearing hat, gloves and scarf! When the sun comes up, that’s when the real work begins.

Everyone can see! We’re more awake! There were some brilliant sightings at dawn including the dominant male lion and his sub adult cubs and a tower of giraffes (Tower = name of group of giraffes).

The main focus was to track the 3 male cheetahs. Using a telemetry tracker, sightings from the previous day and pawprints in the ground, we all put our heads together to find these allusive cats. If we found the cheetahs, we’d take down their location, what they were doing e.g. sat down, and fullness rating. Then off to track the lions! Or head back to base if they’ve already been found by other vehicles. (Stopping to admire anything interesting along the way)

What might you see?

Impala, nyala, giraffes, elephants, white rhino, kudu. If you’re really lucky, Leopards, if you’re blessed by god, hyena or pangolin!.

11:30am. Suns getting hot and usually by this time you’re either back or heading back to base. There might be a talk being run by one of the members of staff, something on base that needs painting or a dog that needs brushing. Or maybe you just need a nap?

12:30pm. LUNCH TIME. The base mostly served vegetarian food and it was cooked by 2 volunteers. Each day 2 different volunteers were assigned base duty, they would clean and cook. My favourite lunch was corn fritters.

1pm. With an hour and a half to kill before the next drive and the sun high in the sky, there’s not too much to do. You might help wash the cruisers, sunbathe or read a good book.

2:30pm. Afternoon Drive! This can either be another escapade to find the cheetahs, or work on the reserve. Reserve work was all good fun and extremely fulfilling. Sometimes we would be tasked in filling in off roads – roads created in the bush to try and get closer to animals – This involves chopping down the nearby dead trees/branches and lying them across the off road to prevent permanent use. Or maybe your task would be to chop back the verges.

6pm. Dinner time!

7pm. Chill!

We didnt always locate the cheetah boys. We were on the reserve for 5 days before my first sighting. But each day bought something new and every time we were lucky enough to find them I felt like the luckiest person in the world. To experience these guys in the wild was a privilege, I hope dearly we can continue to help Cheetahs, and all species survive.

What else does a GVI volunteer get up to on Karongwe?

Every week you have the opportunity to go into Hoedspruit town and take part in saturday night party night.

Every Sunday is your free day - rent a car and go to Kruger National Park! Explore the mountains or take a trip to Hoedspruit.

Every other week a volunteer can go to the local school, give presentations on local wildlife and playing sports with the children (they will beat you at football).

Attend lectures given by the staff to learn more about the environment youre living in, the animals around you and the conservation done to help them thrive.

**Morning duty? Before every drive check’s have to be done on the car to ensure its fit for travel through the bush. The tyre pressure needs checking, oil levels and all the other good stuff. If your morning duty isn’t vehicle based, you may have a role to do during the drive. This can include spotlight, as you leave several hours before the sun comes up and need a spotlight to see animals in the dark, vehicle tidy (the person with the binbag), or maybe you’re on data or navigation!

Data was probably the best role as you got to sit up front with the driver and take notes of sightings communicated over the radio by other vehicles, as well as your own sightings! However, my favourite role was navigation, trying to follow the roads of the reserve was difficult (especially when it got dark!) and I enjoyed the challenge.

#gvi #volunteering #wildlife #wildlifephotography #volunteer #gvivolunteer #cheetahs #cats #kitties #nature #southafrica #karongwe #wildlifeblog #adayinthelife #wildel

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elephant-in-the-pride-parade · 7 years ago

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Waverly And The Silent L-Word

"My L-Love." (Jesus fucking christ Waves you're gonna kill me.) That TINY TINY hiccup on the L-word. How long has she been refusing to say it? To have it come out so short and shocked like that. How long has she refused to say it? To have her pause right after acknowledging it. Just for that moment, was she terrified of what word she'd just unleashed. Cause Lemme tell you, Waverly Earp and the L-Word... big fucking deal. Waverly Earp loved her mom. She remembers just enough to know that. And she remembers waking up one quiet morning and padding down the stairs. Willa still asleep, Wynonna still asleep, Ward passed out at the kitchen table surrounded by Empty bottles. And the car being gone from the drive. I bet she waited up every night and every morning until kindergarten started just to see if maybe her mother was coming back. I bet Waverly heard everyone in her family but Wynonna say her mother left because of her. I bet she learned early love doesnt make people stay. Waverly loved Bobo. Bobo her friend, her best friend, her only friend. Who played with her and who pulled her out of the lake and who brought her books from the library when Ward wouldnt. Waverly loved Bobo. After the Homestead gets attacked, she lies awake calling for him, wishing hard for him to appear. because he ALWAYS did before - whenever she needed him - he's be waiting just beyond the tree line. But now her Daddy is dead and Willa probably is and Wynonna is in a hospital she hates and Waverly only gets to see her for a few hours every saturday - then every other saturday when Wynonna misbehaves and loses privileges. Even Chrissy can't compare to Bobo. Six year old Waverly probably sat up in Gus and Curtis house and wondered why her only friend left her. If he loved her, if she was his angel, shouldnt he be here? She'd been momma's angel too. But that hadn't stopped her from leaving. Maybe, baby Waverly thinks, that's her curse. Waverly loves Wynonna Wynonna was in and out of Waverly's life from the time she was in first grade to when she graduated high school. And then Wynonna was gone entirely. and there were days Waverly wondered if she'd come back at all. Waverly loved Wynonna and Wynonna left. Waverly's older now. and she knows the only curse on her is the Earp one. but even so... it still seems like everyone Waverly dares to love is destined to leave her. She never told Gus she loved her. A kind of insurance. If waverly never loved Gus, Gus wouldnt leave. She never told Curtis either, until he was gone. And as much as she knows that was the damn revenants it's hard not to wonder if it isnt her too. Everyone Waverly loves leaves... or dies. Momma left. Bobo left. Wynonna left. Curtis Died. Shorty Died. Even Shorty's Bar, when Gus sells it, isnt Immune to Waverly's own personal curse. And then there's Nicole. Nicole... Sweet, beautiful, sexy, funny, tall, vivacious, strong, steady Nicole.. As soon as she kisses her, Waverly starts resisting the urge to think too hard about it. Think too hard, and she'll know she's falling for Nicole. And that's bad. she can't fall in love with her. Love is terrifying. Love leaves. Willa nearly proves it too. Waverly had given her love a voice in a moment of desperation, because maybe just maybe it could save nicole from Willa. and before she'd even looked to see if Nicole hard heard what she told Wynonna, Willa had struck Nicole in the chest with a bullet anyways. The moment Waverly sees the bulletproof vest she is shocked and overjoyed and thanks every deity she can think of. And bless Nicole. Prepared, smart, going-where-the-danger-is Nicole. Still. As soon as Waverly has a moment to breathe, she's terrified all over again. She loves Nicole Haught. and yes, Willa didnt succeed in taking her away, but that doesnt mean something else wont. Waverly wishes she'd never used the L-word as a bargaining chip. She stuffed it back down into the depths of her heart and chokes it back down each time it tries to bubble up. She loves Nicole Haught. But if Waverly lets that out into the air, into the light of day, then it would only be a matter of time before the universe took Nicole away too.. Nicole says I love you. Nicole says it like it's a breath of fresh air. And Each time she says it Waverly chokes a little more on an L-word of her own. Even while they're fighting. Even in the hospital. Hell... "We are not doing this now." Because to Waverly I love you is always followed by goodbye and holy hell is this not goodbye. Nicole's future is dire but hell if Waverly is going to put the odds anymore against her. "I'll see you when you wake up." she tells Nicole instead. But even holding back the L-Word isnt enough. And Waverly isnt ready to say goodbye, no. Not a chance in hell. Greta. The Iron Witch. Greta can help. Waverly goes to her and all but pleads. And in her desperation, she loses her grip on that dreaded word "My L-Love." My Love... For one terrifying moment Waverly feels the dread of having lost her grip on that word. But then the witch agrees to help and Nicole is getting a cure. And Soon she is sitting up and yawning and smiling at Waverly like she was never dying. Like this wasnt the second-close call in 3 freaking months. When Nicole wakes, Waverly kisses her until they're breathless and they fall into the hospital bed together as Waverly cries... and the word, the cursed word, bubbles up in Waverly's throat. "I lo..." Waverly stops and chokes the word back. She covers it up with a sob. "I almost lost you." Waverly says to Nicole instead. "I'd never leave you." Nicole says back. "God I love you Waverly, I'm so sorry..." Waverly Earp Loves Nicole Haught. And that terrifies her. Because everyone Waverly loves leaves. And besides Wynonna, Waverly loves Nicole more than every single other person she has ever loved. And every person she loves leaves. And Damnit if the L-Word isn't going to stay locked up where it belongs for just as long as Waverly can manage it. Because Waverly loves Nicole Haught. But she's terrified to say it. And she's not at ALL ready to face that fear.

#wynonna earp spoilers #wynonna earp 2x10 #wynonna earp #we spoilers #we 2x10 #wearp spoilers #wearp 2x10 #nicole haught #wayhaught #waverly earp

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janzz · 6 years ago

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day 3: its 3:47am on day 4 and i forgot to write my daily post

really really really trying hard to make this a habit (just for april)

so fail but lol

here’s my post for today

i went to a yoga class tonight in santa clara and it was the yogi’s first time and she was so good omg!

not quite as good as my fave instructor of all time (the bae lauren at moxie yoga in sf)

but yeah kimberly at corepower santa clara square might make me a regular!

(which honestly is super great because i went to class with norma and it was awful LOL) (she played like hardcore edm at a chill class??) (to be fair it was also a level 2 class and i was struggling a little and kimberly’s class was a level 1....)

(oh i went to whole foods in the same plaza right after and ngl im starting to really enjoy just physically being in those fancy ass supermarkets. i went to a new to me nob hill after orangetheory surprisingly also in santa clara ----theyre just nice and clean and beautiful. however spending $45 to get way less stuff than a 99 ranch or something still feels way wrong. i got bananas cashew milk chia seed refill 18 brown eggs (anthony likes the brown ones idk) natural deodorant (cause native has been sucking hard) ginger tofu mushrooms orange juice fancy sprouted bread shredded cheese actually ok when i list that all out its a decent amount for whole foods. the stuff is just smaller yknow like the presliced white mushrooms were $1 for easily like 3 or so oz less)

anyway i find this funny because when i started dating anthony in 2015 he would go to nob hill markets and always claim it was his favorite market (because the chicken he would buy from there would never go bad etc). i thought he was like idk rich af -- to be fair he went to stanford 2x and has his masters and is 2 years older so yeah he is definitely more privileged than me. like i didnt have a preference for cage free brown eggs like i never had the money to spend the extra $1 or 2 on that shit when i was slaving at starbucks AND a second office job.

its really weird how money changes your life. its 2019 and i finally hit the 100k 6 figure mark. it’s honestly been a STRUGGLE to get here, but i’ve learned a lot along the way -- primarily that you HAVE to negotiate and generally just get paid more to improve your life. anyway yeah money doesn’t solve problems but it generally reduces your mental calories and makes things way more convenient.

before when i was poorer, i would have to go out of my way to make sure i was getting the cheapest shell gasoline in the area (still gotta have standards and not give into that arco bullshit). i would never go into whole foods or places like that because my dollar had to stretch further. whenever i would go out with friends before i’d have to be SUPER mindful of what i ordered and i would be EXTRA annoyed when you go out in a group and when splitting venmo people wouldnt pay the extra gratuity and i’d factor in me covering it because as a barista and server its bs when ppl dont tip well

now -- idgaf if i go out to eat a lot or splurge when im out w friends. dropping $50-$100 randomly cause something is on clearance at lululemon is not a big deal. im not anal about my boyfriend and i splitting everything exactly 5050 down the middle cause meh whatever i dont need to be given money back for like the minimal difference. if whole foods is convenient for me to go to after a workout ill go in without batting an eyelash.

it is weird tho being poor and then having money -- like ill go to lululemon but absolutely CANNOT buy anything full price. i still like watching movies but 99% of the time go on discount days cause spending $20 when i could spend $9 feels wrong. whenever i do basic things with my boyfriend, like going to the grocery store or mall, i’m most definitely the most cost conscious -- checking against the value per oz, whereas he just picks whatever and gives no thoughts to it (i think he makes like 240k a year thereabouts, definitely more than double but i dont know the specifics). i drive a 2015 toyota corolla le he drives a nicer but still affordable more luxury sedan hyundai sonata souped up with seat warmers navigation and he’s installed a dash cam and stuff. my car is definitely a commuter car that’s just one level up from the s basic model. when i htink about buying a new car i dont know if i could buy a lexus but yet i sometimes think about getting a tesla instead of a prius

another weird one is getting mad at myself for leaving reusable grocery bags LITERALLY in the trunk and then having to pay the $0.10 per bag. I’ve easily spent at least $15 on bags prob. Before i would be kicking myself hard cause i’d need to pinch pennies. another thing that ive noticed makes me feel “rich” is i can sustain my craft coffee/boba habit just fine and not give a fuck. before i got more mindful of it i htink my my coffee boba budget was like $100 a month. ive always loved craft coffee, but it has to be RIGHT if i was gonna spend $6. when i was living w my parents in san diego going to a new coffee shop and driving up to encinitas or whatever was like THE trip. now i get philz off my mobile app whenever i head out of class or if im feeling like it and its not that special

but yeah, im not rich by any means but it was huge to go from like $16 an hour at my office job/$15.70?? w/ benefits I think that was my starbucks shift supervisor rate/annual salaries of 20k ish to $39k at a law firm in downtown sac (grossly underpaid but at least rent was only $300 at a family friends) back to the law firm job up to $70k. there i got a raise at the same job from 70 to 80k and then 80k to 86.

THEN cause i was privileged enough to have been able to save money making more when i hated my job i just up and quit (i think i had like no more than 5k in savings at the time --it wouldve been more but i spent 3k on prk/lasik). anyway yeah i was lucky af and got a new job in a month -- and the offer for this job was 100k base, 10k bonus, some amount of stock (i still suck at this stuff) and a stupid amount of perks like $1000 gym reimbursement and basically free health insurance -- if i annualize all my pay+perks, assuming i get my full bonus, its prob like 120k.

so i have like 5x ed my income in 4 years since graduating from college.

the crazy part is people that were more privileged than me STARTED at 100k as new grads, including 401ks and what not. im lucky becuase i started mine back when i was 18 at starbucks.

income inequality and access to knowledge/resources has become something ive become more aware about and passionate about over time. me and my boyfriend clashed a lot earlier i think because we literally were in different planes of our lives and income levels. we’ve been together 3 years, but have known each other for 4. we broke up for 1 year in between -- and yeah ngl had i never improved myself or actually reached my income/earning potential we likely would not have gotten back together. additionally him supporting me when we got back together raised me out of not the poverty level but yeah we met and i made 39k. i took the plunge and moved out to sf for myself and lets be real for him too and made 70k which was a huge jump. and in a short 15 months or so i jumped again to 100k base.

im never gonna make as much as he does (men/women blah we can get into that) but yeah even having access to money adjacently is so powerful. anthony never outright gave me money and im too much of a hardass independent person that ive NEVER borrowed money from him, never intend to. i really vehemently despise the idea of free loading but because of him just being around yeah my life has been improved.

when we met in 2015 in our young 20s we were in our have fun phase. i was too poor to have gone to thiings like coachella or out to a concert. he got me into music and made it easy for me to experience because he’d buy the ticket, drinks, pick me up and pay for sf parking. i would likely get dinner ahead of time or something small and generally we would switch so if he got tickets one time i’d get them next. but he ALWAYS paid for drinks and lets be real the occasional not drinks :P he had introduced me to music in such a way that i was willing to drop $800 or so on coachella + car camping + take pto days even when we were broken up 10ish months or whatever it was the first time we dated but if you think about it he likely dropped at least 1k on me during those 10 months without batting an eye lash. i made 39k at the time working in downtown sacramento and he made 90k base (maybe 115k total comp) living in SF.

despite just basic things like me being immature for 23 -- a big reason i think we broke up at the time was the income level inequality. it was both our first jobs out of school (first job out of stanford grad for him, he immediately got his masters out of undergrad). i did a round of uc davis, community, uc davis.

he told me he was breaking up with me because when we met i had originally wanted to be a lawyer and then didnt end up pursuing that path and he saw it as a lack of ambition/drive. what he didnt see was general growing up and not having access to lawyers as i grew up, just me working at this really top tier A+ law firm and feeling out of place as an asian woman working with rich WASPs. me wearing pencil skirts and having major impostor syndrome. what he did end up seeing was an insecure version of myself in our relationship with me bending over backwards to make him happy.

when i moved to sf and made 70k it definitely was a huge ego boost to make that additional 30k, but to be real, here in sf and paying more rent than i was in sac and SD/just general living being expensive 70k wasnt that much. what it did for my confidence though was priceless (i was an ea to a ceo at a tech startup). i really grew into myself and was more confident in my abilities -- and honestly a lot of that was just getting older and knowing that i was good at things, bad at certain things and i wasnt going through my quarterlife/post grad crisis anymore.

then those raises to 80k and 86k made me more ballsy. these things were obvi practiced with anthony as i had a partner to discuss and practice with/an educated thought partner. at this time anthony was making $150k base or so (after realizing he had been grossly underpaid as a PM for the 90k initial salary)

all of this set me up to basically make my position what it is now AND for it to be 100k. tbh im a glorified low level coordinator at a big company. i honest to goodness for the first three months probably worked a total of 2ish hours a day? this role should probably max out at 90k. and by max out i mean this role likely shouldve started at 75k with incremental raises to get to 90 in like 3 years. i STARTED at 100 and can likely if i play my cards right be promoted to a program manager in a year (or less). that’ll prob bump me to a base of 120 or so if i’m aggressive.

i always shitted on sf when i moved here because i hate the tech bros, the elitist ppl, the vcs who think theyre out here changing the world but seriously being surrounded by people that went to ivy leagues or the UC’s that were better than mine have honestly, like my boyfriend, just uplifted my status. something as small as casual lunch time conversation being more intellectual makes a huge difference for me re: how stimulated i feel and how much more energized ive become because of ppl around me. i def still have impostor syndrome all the time but its been so much growth from 23 to 27.

30s should be great because ill be well into my career by then and making even more and closing the gap even more w my boyfriend. its funny too cause hes 29 now AND FINALLY getting that postgrad quarter life crisis. his privilege was able to offset him to have this crisis later on in life where he made more money and could make smarter choices. privilege really is the thing that keeps on giving and im grateful to have started poor and really appreciate it. as i make more money i also care more and more to give back. if i ever do run for office in my 50s or whatever im gonna push for more access to education and arts. i had an interest in this as an undergrad but couldnt pursue it because itd be a lifetime of poverty, but yeah who knows.

dang this went long but it is really interesting when i think about money and how much its effected me. im lucky i was able to raise myself out of the level my immigrant parents brought me and my sister to. them moving out of the philippines was the best thing that ever happened to me. the second is them fronting the bill for my university education. the privilege i have is extremely special and important and i want to honor their sacrifices because im sitting on a 100k because of decades of hard work and frugality on their ends.

im fucking lucky.

we gotta pass on the resources and uplift those around us if we are fortunate.

...another rant altogether but i wish the leadership in the United States thought the same way.

(end: 4:36am, why do i do this to myself)

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stardatextoday · 8 years ago

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So I've stayed quiet long enough and I think I'm finally ready to talk about my feelings and my reaction to the story that's been circulating about the ridiculous reaction to the radio cutest couple contest. I was not expecting this to go viral, much less turn out in my favor so much. I never realized that after being a safe space for so long, that i in turn get to feel safe as well. my wife's job prevents her from being on the phone during the day and lately she's been very overwhelmed checking in at the end of the night so I think that I'll be the one to talk about this. Plus we all know that I am the extrovert of the two and I'll talk about anything. When I dropped the collage of our photos in the comment section of the radio contest, I knew that there would be some sort of lackluster reaction to it. But society has progressed AND it was our anniversary so i was full of happiness. Once i entered, I forgot about my the contest for quite a bit of time I didn't even realize people have voted for me until i got tagged in something My wife and I have been together for eight years. eight years. that's close to a decade. We are so full of love and positivity that we have made it our mission to take that overflowing love and share it with other people. We are inclusive, we listen, we sympathize, and we are a safe haven for everyone who has ever met us. I thought that by entering a normally very heteronormative traditional contest, that at least one same-sex couple could see it and remember that they are just as valid as other couples. Being married to a woman doesnt make me more or less bisexual, so my orientation shouldnt matter. I didn't expect to win, honestly, i didn't expect even make it into the contest. I'm used to seeing discrimination like that in everyday life and I would've understood if the radio station had chosen the way the traditional way to avoid conflict- even if it would have been exclusionary. However it's 2017 and times are changing. I don't expect the runner up with the poor attitude. (I blocked him almost immediately so i dont remember his name) to understand what its like to go outside and fear for your life when your partner grabs your hand. Did you stand at the courthouse trembling when the registrar asked why my wife was changing her name? No, you didn't. You werent there when i bawled in 2012 because doing my 2011 taxes meant filing as single even though I had gotten a civil union on 11/11/11. Nevermind my legal marriage in 2012 or anything. No, you weren't there. Youll never have to be there. You wont ever have to explain your decisions to people. You dont have to face discrimination for your relationship. My marriage is so strong and so loving, and yet people still wish me dead for it. Ive been called a dyke since i was 11. Ive had it written on my desk, ive had it written in my own blood on the schools bathroom mirror after being assaulted in middle school. Ive been sexually assault because of it, and ive been denied opportunities because of my sexual orientation. I dont owe anyone these explanations but i just want people to understand that after years of being called things like a "fat dyke" those words mean nothing to me. In fact I embraced them. Not everyone is privileged enough to do that. I love being chubby. I really do. I spent years and years hating myself and honestly i have never felt more beautiful and honest with myself as i do now. Yeah, i spend my free time squatting and meal prepping, but you'd never know that because im just a "250# dyke" to you. (Bless you for thinking im only 250 lol) Im a fighter; anyone whos spent more than 15 seconds with me knows that I enjoy every single last drop of diversity, yes even your bigoted opinions. Why? Because your opinions based out of hatred just reinforce mine out of love (and a little spite honestly). Your hashtags are appalling. I was put on this planet to do far more than procreate, and honestly insinuating that people who arent fertile or cannot have children, are not people is dehumanizing and objectifying. You keep giving half-assed apologies about how your beliefs are solid, and honestly i dont give a singular shit. I think you're a petulant child who lost a local radio contest because your support is far less than mine. But, thats just my opinion. My opinions are not preventing you from anything, honestly. I still think you deserve basic human rights, even though you think far less for me My wife has come home every night, too anxious about safety and notoriety to do much of anything. I never wanted this to go viral, but honestly your terrible responses from YOU and YOUR BUSINESS are the reasons this spread like wildfire. I havent said anything other than the occasional "No, please don't mention my name in your article." You are upset that your name/address/and phone number were revealed but it was one google search away. If you didnt want to be public, try not being a public official. I have gotten so overwhelmed by the love and support given to my family. People i havent spoken to in years and people that i dont even know have reached out. Ive cried in public when people told me i gave them hope. I am no saint. I am just a fat bisexual girl who likes cats and black lipstick. Im supportive and kind, even my enemies will tell you so. I wish youd stopped to get to know me before trying to assimilate a biography from a collage in the comments of a local radio stations contest I hope you had a great Valentine's Day. I spent mine eating ice cream and singing songs while driving with my wife. Hopefully someday you understand that opinions are kind of like umbrellas- everyone should have them but theyre not always necessary. Feel free to share this and tag anyone whos been involved, i would like for this to be the last of this drama tbh. http://wqad.com/2017/02/15/henry-county-board-member-attacks-lesbian-couple-sparks-facebook-fire-storm/

#lgbt #bisexual #homophobia #gay #biphobia

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viralhottopics · 8 years ago

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X-Plan: Giving Your Kids A Way Out

Friends, as most of you know, I get to spend an hour each week with a group of young people going through addiction recovery. Yes. Young people. Im talking teenagers who are locked away for at least six months as they learn to overcome their addictions. Im always humbled and honored to get this time with these beautiful young souls that have been so incredibly assaulted by a world they have yet to understand. This also comes with the bittersweet knowledge that these kids still have a fighting chance while several of my friends have already had to bury their own children.

Recently I asked these kids a simple question: How many of you have found yourself in situations where things started happening that you werent comfortable with, but you stuck around, mainly because you felt like you didnt have a way out?

They all raised their hands.

Every single one of them.

In the spirit of transparency I get it. Though in my mid-40s, Im still in touch with that awkward boy who often felt trapped in the unpredictable currents of teenage experiences. I cant count the times sex, drugs, and alcohol came rushing into my young world; I wasnt ready for any of it, but I didnt know how to escape and, at the same time, not castrate myself socially. I still recall my first time drinking beer at a friends house in junior high schoolI hated it, but I felt cornered. As an adult, that now seems silly, but it was my reality at the time. Peer pressure was a frivolous term for an often silent but very real thing; and I certainly couldnt call my parents and ask them to rescue me. I wasnt supposed to be there in the first place. As a teen, forcing down alcohol seemed a whole lot easier than offering myself up for punishment, endless nagging and interrogation, and the potential end of freedom as I knew it.

X-Plan

www.BertFulks.com

For these reasons, we now have something called the X-plan in our family. This simple, but powerful tool is a lifeline that our kids are free to use at any time. Heres how it works:

Lets say that my youngest, Danny, gets dropped off at a party. If anything about the situation makes him uncomfortable, all he has to do is text the letter X to any of us (his mother, me, his older brother or sister). The one who receives the text has a very basic script to follow. Within a few minutes, they call Dannys phone. When he answers, the conversation goes like this:

Hello?

Danny, somethings come up and I have to come get you right now.

What happened?

Ill tell you when I get there. Be ready to leave in five minutes. Im on my way.

At that point, Danny tells his friends that somethings happened at home, someone is coming to get him, and he has to leave.

In short, Danny knows he has a way out; at the same time, theres no pressure on him to open himself to any social ridicule. He has the freedom to protect himself while continuing to grow and learn to navigate his world.

www.BertFulks.com

This is one of the most loving things weve ever given him, and it offers him a sense of security and confidence in a world that tends to beat our young people into submission.

However, theres one critical component to the X-plan: Once hes been extracted from the trenches, Danny knows that he can tell us as much or as little as he wants but its completely up to him. The X-plan comes with the agreement that we will pass no judgments and ask no questions (even if he is 10 miles away from where hes supposed to be). This can be a hard thing for some parents (admit it, some of us are complete control-freaks); but I promise it might not only save them, but it will go a long way in building trust between you and your kid.

(One caveat here is that Danny knows if someone is in danger, he has a moral obligation to speak up for their protection, no matter what it may cost him personally. Thats part of the lesson we try to teach our kidswe are our brothers keeper, and sometimes we have to stand for those too weak to stand for themselves. Beyond that, he doesnt have to say a word to us. Ever.)

For many of us parents, we lament the intrusion of technology into our relationships. I hate seeing people sit down to dinner together and then proceed to stare into their phones. It drives me nuts when my kids text me from another room in our house. However, cell phones arent going away so we need to find ways to use this technology to help our kids in any way we can.

Since first publishing this on my personal site, Ive seen an incredible amount of discussion about the pros and cons. Here are some of the questions folks have had:

Doesnt this encourage dishonesty?

Absolutely not. It actually presents an opportunity for you as a parent to teach your kids that they can be honest (something DID come up, and they DO have to leave), while learning that its okay to be guarded in what they reveal to others. They dont owe anyone an explanation the next day, and if asked can give the honest answer, Its private and I dont want to talk about it. Boom! Another chance for a social skill life-lesson from Mom and Dad.

Does this cripple a kid socially instead of teaching them to stand up to others?

I know plenty of adults who struggle to stand up to others. This simply gives your kid a safe way out as you continue to nurture that valuable skill.

What if this becomes habitual?

If youre regularly rescuing your kid, hopefully your family is having some conversations about that.

If you dont talk about it or ask questions, how do they learn?

If youre building a relationship of trust with your kids, theyll probably be the ones to start the conversation. More importantly, most of these conversations need to take place on the FRONT-side of events. Ever taken a cruise? They all make you go through the safety briefing in case the boat sinks. They dont wait until the ships on fire to start telling you about the lifeboats. Talk with them. Let your kids ask questions and give them frank answers.

If theyre not where theyre supposed to be, shouldnt there be consequences?

Lets be honest. A kid in fear of punishment is a lot less likely to reach out for help when the world comes at them. Admitting that theyre in over their heads is a pretty big life lesson all by itself. However, dont get so caught up in all of the details. This isnt a one-size-fits-all scheme. Every parent, every kid, and every situation is unique. What it might look like in your family could be totally different from mineand thats okay.

I urge you to use some form of an X-plan in your home. If you honor it, your kids will thank you for it. You never know when something so simple could be the difference between your kid laughing with you at the dinner table or spending six months in a recovery center or (God forbid) something far worse.

At the end of the day, however, the most important thing is that youre having some open, honest discussions with your kids. Keep building a relationship of trust. This isnt the same world we grew up in. Its not like sneaking a beer at Billys house anymore. Our kids face things on a daily basis thatgiven one bad decisioncan be fatal. Dont believe me? Ive been to funerals for great kids from awesome families.

Friends, its a dangerous world. And our kids are out in it everyday.

Prayers for strength and compassion to the parents out there as we all try to figure out this parenting gigit never gets easy.

Please share this piece. Talk about it with your kids. If this somehow gives just one kid a way out of a bad situation, we can all feel privileged to have been a part of that.

#xplan

Blessings, friends.

This piece originally appeared on www.BertFulks.com