#i loved pickle as a character (not as a villain he was always more of a fucking victim) n i loved the casual interactions but man

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Guileless

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon, manipulation, dejection, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: The reader attempts to move past her ruination, but is reminded of her tarnish conscience at every turn. (Regency AU, tall!reader)

Masterlist

Character: Steve Rogers, Thor Odinson

Note: thanks to those who waited on this one!.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)

Love you like I love coffee and that’s a lot and probably unhealthy. Take care. 💖

It should be the happiest time in your life. You should be elated, and yet, as ever it is, every victory precedes a treacherous defeat. A proposal one day, and despair the next. That nipping of doom in your gut, that ever present doubt, is made certain by the passage of time. It has been much too long. 

You sit in the pews, throat tight as you keep your chin locked. You breathe slowly, as if too sudden an intake might unleash the tempest brewing inside of you. It is more than nerves, you know it, that sicken you so. You should be happy for your pending nuptials but you are only horrified at the thought. 

The bishop reads out the banns before the rows; the first for yourself, the third for your sister. She will be permitted to wed and your mother has presided over much of planning already. You dip your head as your name rings out beside Lord Odinson’s and you swallow back a swell of bile. You’ve been gulping down your own stomach for much of the morning, ever since you caught a whiff of pickled shallots in passing the kitchens. 

You push your head up and your hand down to your lap, knowing you will be observed. You must at least look certain of your fate. You must sit proud for the engagement all would put into question. For the time until it shall all dissolve, you must play your part. 

You can barely keep from wilting where you are. A prudent woman might bite her tongue. She may commit to the theatre of it all. She might lie and get away with the folly. You glance over at Lord Odinson, just across the aisle, and you know you cannot. It isn’t one lie, it’s a lifetimes’ worth of betrayal. 

Yet how should you tell it? It isn’t only him who must know. Your father would need good reason why you’d rather the convent to a proper marriage. You will be ruined but you could not put that stain upon the only person who was ever kind to you. Lord Odinson deserves an honest wife and a child of his own. 

Your insides sour and you nearly spasm as you fight the tide of nausea, brought upon by more than your forsaken condition. Your eyes trail away from your betrothed to another man bound in promise. Lord Rogers sits with your sister, as ever, and she leans on him shamelessly, even beneath the Lord’s rafters. 

She would deny it. She would laugh in your face should you ever reveal the absolute truth. No, you must confess the sin as your own and that alone. You will not name the culprit for they would they never believe you and he would never admit it himself. 

Yet, you know that the Duke Rogers will ever be triumphant in knowing that he has brought the monstrous giant to her knees. You are his Goliath, the vile retched creature he has slain in his valour. He will be hero and you be the villain. 

💟

You hand the letter to the carrier just before noon. You don’t expect an audience to be granted until the next morning at earliest. Lord Odinson is a busy man; an ambassador in much demand between the house and society. Even his betrothed must request his presence. 

The cart rattles through the gates and you watch it fade off into the grim horizon. The winter bites in the air, adding to the chill in your bones. That coldness that freeze over your heart. You must be strong now, as strong as the valkyrie he misnamed you as. 

When you go to Lord Odinson, you will bring the crown to him. You will hand it back and admit your tainted stature to him. You will show him how truly small you are.  

At least, that is what you intend. You may prove yourself weak as ever. However it should unfold, this engagement cannot persist. 

“A day! A day and I shall call you husband,” Cora’s shrill tone greets you as you come through the front doors. She is in the sitting room with Lord Rogers. Your mother continues to fawn over the last-minute details for their wedding. “Isn’t it very exciting, my lord?” 

“And I shall call you wife.” 

“And Duchess,” she preens with a trilling laugh, “oh, how elaborate I shall be.” 

“My Athena,” Rogers drones back, “my goddess, my beloved.” 

“Oh, how darling,” your mother preens over them, “it shall be resplendent. I’ve made certain the cake will be exactly as you like it, dearie. The cook has even procured some citrus for the lemonade.” 

The mention of lemonade makes you shrivel. You recall the sunny day when Lord Rogers spoke to you over a weeping beverage. As you fell for that virulent charm. And all that came after. 

You peer at the grim windows and frown. How everything does change so quickly. Happiness is fleeting and yet disappointment comes as a chronic plight. You will never know a day without shame. 

You flit off without notice. Your heart rents at the thought that you will not have the same fervour. You will not sit and plan your own wedding with Lord Odinson. All your fanciful dreams have evaporated. It is one thing to put a mask on, to pretend as virgin, but you could never foist a bastard upon the kind man who has shown you a taste happiness. You will be certain to thank him for all he’s done but you will not spit in his face. 

As you get to the bedroom doors, your stomach churns violently and you burst through, not stopping as you rush to the pot and fall to your knees. You wretch into it as your body contracts painfully. You empty your stomach until you are panting and hollow. 

“Sister,” Alina startles you as she rolls to the edge of the bed, a novel in hand, “is it a winter ague?” 

“I...” you shakily wipe your mouth with the back of your hand, “I believe so.” 

That lie alone singes your tongue like a brand. Your eyes well with tears and you flick them away with your lashes. You sit back on your heels and heave out a pungent breath. 

“Oh, how awful, and just before the wedding,” she sits up and shuts the novel. “Let us pray it passes quickly. You needn’t delay your own nuptials.” 

“Mm, no, that wouldn’t be...” you let the sentence tail off and you stand, taking the pot with you, “I’ll dump it before it can stink.” 

“If you are unwell, call for the maid.” 

“No, it is fine,” you insist, “I didn’t mean to disturb your reading.” 

“You didn’t,” she insists. “What’s the matter, sissie? You hardly seem a lady about to marry.” 

“I...” you croak, “it is the ague, that’s all.” 

“Mm, perhaps Lord Odinson might offer some comfort should it get any worse. He does seem the character,” she offers. 

“Or perhaps he is better to stay away. You as well, should it pass onto anyone else,” you hold the pot to your stomach and turn, carrying it out without another word. Albina huffs and falls back onto the bed, the flutter of pages following shortly after. 

You descend and keep along the wall, passing through the kitchens and beyond the servants’ quarters to the rear of the manse. You come out into the crisp air and overturn the pot well away from the house. A wave of dizziness washes over you, silver spots dotting your vision. Perhaps it is an ague. Oh how you wish it were. 

You set the pot down as you grasp at some stability. You stand and wipe your clammy forehead. Your hand drifts down to your bodice and you let it venture further. You try to feel your stomach through the layers. It is tauter than it once was but no rounder. Not as yet. 

You sit on a low stump, the seat the stabler uses to shoe the horses. You let the frigid air seep through your dress and stare at the grey clouds that blot out the sun. You hold your chin, elbows on your legs, hunched over as you let the stagnancy of that moment swallow you. 

For a moment, you believe that you can make time stand still. That you might stretch on this fantasy a little longer. That a single second might be spent into an eternity. You shake your head and close your eyes as your cheeks tingle with the cold. 

You try to picture the convent. You imagine dark halls and darker mornings. Prayers and repentance filling the days and keeping wakeless the nights. Would the nuns even accept a ruined soul like yours? 

“Miss,” Mary, the broom girl, stands along the path back to the house, “you have a caller.” 

You sit up and blink, a caller? How long have you been there? You shiver and rise, towering over the young servant like the mottled forest creature of wives tales. You nod and stride past her, rubbing your arms to warm yourself as you return to the house. 

It cannot be him. Not already. You’re not prepared. It has been all you can think of and yet you are wholly unready for it. 

You carry on inside and come into the main hall. Lord Odinson waits, your mother chittering at his elbow as Lord Rogers and Cora stand in the archway to the west wing. 

“You will be at the wedding tomorrow? We did not receive your response sir,” your mother pleads as she tugs his sleeve. 

“Ah, yes, did I not give it?” Odinson says coolly, “certainly I will come with some Asgardian ale to christen the blissful newlyweds.” 

“And we thank you for such generosity,” Cora coos. 

“I’m certain refreshments will be plenty,” Lord Rogers deflects. 

“Ah,” Lord Odinson’s attention is drawn by your emergence from behind the staircase, “my valkyrie, you called for me and I am here.” 

“I... you have come so... swiftly,” you remark, your voice teetering. 

“Of course,” he assures as he crosses the polished floor, “as ever I will for my beloved.” He approaches and takes your hands in his, kissing your knuckles, “you are like ice,” he feels your hands and covers them with his gloved ones, “are you ill?” 

“No, uh, yes, no,” you stammer, “sir, I only meant... I only thought to speak with you.” 

“I do cherish the tenor of your sweet voice, lady, I would ride so fast as I might to hear it,” he assures. 

“You rode... all this way, my lord?” 

“I do prefer to be in a saddle,” he affirms, “so, shall we converse? Perhaps we might have some tea to warm you, my valkyrie.” 

“Please,” you cringe, wishing he would quit his honeyed words, “I do not require it. Perhaps somewhere private...” 

“With chaperone of course,” your mother insists. You blanch but do your best not to show your unease. “Pollo! Pollo!” She claps, “forgive me I will not be able to do so myself as I have much to attend to for the morrow, but we have a groom here... Pollo!” 

She cries out and the dark-haired man appears. The old groom has a round belly and wine-reddened cheeks. He doesn’t speak more than Italian but he is steadfast in his service. Your mother bids him, pointing at you, then shoos him with a flick of her fingers. 

He shrugs and bows his head, nearing you and the duke. You peer over at your sister and Lord Rogers as they watch. The former stares at your betrothed as he clings still to your hands and the latter narrows his eyes in your direction. Just the sight of him makes you even more sick than before. Of any, he cannot know though you expect should Cora find out, it will not be a secret. 

“The sun room, perhaps,” Odinson suggests. 

“As you wish,” you agree. 

He offers his arms and you accept it. He guides you along, well-acquainted to the halls already, and takes you around to the sun room. The curtains are closed and the space is dim with the shadow of winter. The groom claims the armchair in the corner, making it groan with his weight, as another servant follows to light a lamp and put flint to the fireplace. 

When all is lit, you detach from Odinson and retreat from him. You mash your hands together and sway, spinning back to face him as he watches you intently. He seems unbothered by the spontaneity of it all. 

“You missed me? I have longed to see you again,” he beams. 

“Please,” you show your palms, “please, I... we must speak.” 

“Of? Name anything and it shall be yours. As my wife, you will never want for anything, valkyrie.” 

You wince as if struck. You drop your arms and your head. You stalk over to the bench that looks toward the window and sit, slumped forward as you shake your head. He approaches as he lets out a long exhale. He sits beside you. 

“Something is amiss. Forgive me for making light, I came upon mistaken sentiment,” his voice is grave, “you have something to say and I must listen. As ever, I am the storm but these winds have calmed.” 

You rock and another hot tinge settles behind your eyes. You roll them up and sit straight. You crane to see over your shoulder. Rollo’s eyes are closed as he’s halfway to sleeping. It is propriety alone that has him sat in that chair. 

You look ahead once more, “I cannot marry you.” 

He sucks in air and snorts, “what?” 

“I cannot—it cannot—I'm sorry, Lord Odinson.” 

“Why ever should you change your mind? The banns are read and will be again,” he touches your arm and you shy away. 

“You deserve... better.” 

“I deserve you,” he insists. 

“Please, sir, let me find the words,” you beg touch your temples as you try to rein in your wits. You close your eyes and shudder. 

“You are cold still, perhaps you might move closer to the fire--” 

“It hardly matters,” you lower your hands and clutch them tight.  

You make yourself look at him. You must. He warrants at least the truth told to his face and not the floor. His blue eyes twinkle as his usually bright face is stern. 

“I am...” you take a breath and struggle to let it back out as the words burn the tip of your tongue, “I... am with... child.” 

You choke out the last word and nearly faint. You stare at him, waiting for him to explode. You mightn’t even have a say in who knows should he speak too loudly. His eyes search yours and he blinks. He turns his face down and looks at his lap, gripping his thighs as he nods and hums. 

“That’s wonderful,” he says. 

“Pardon?” 

“Yes, it’s wonderful. We’ll have a child.” 

“Sir, I—we haven’t... it is another man’s,” you feel as if you shouldn’t have to explain this. 

“Why certainly he put it there, yes, but I would claim it,” he faces you again. 

Your eyes round, “why should you do that? That isn’t... proper. I am not proper, sir. I am telling you that I have been... corrupted. I should never have said yes.” 

“But you did.” 

“You needn’t-- it isn’t fair.” 

“Perhaps it isn’t fair that you should have to carry the cad’s seed,” he agrees, “for any many who would lay with a lady and not seek her hand, well, he can be nothing else.” 

You’re quiet as disbelief clouds around you. He can’t possibly mean it. He must be in shock. Certainly, he wouldn’t just accept another’s child. 

“Sir, you shouldn’t-- you shouldn’t do this. I am releasing you.” 

“I don’t want to be released,” he says sullenly. 

“Why? Why would you do this?” You ask. 

“I meant all I said to you, from the first breath, my valkyrie,” he proclaims. “And I mean it still.” 

“But, sir, you cannot—I cannot live with myself--” 

“You are honourable. Honest. You have told me this when you did not need to. When you could’ve claimed an early birth, when you could have kept quiet, yet you did not. That says more than a fleeting tryst. For that’s what it was, yes? Or do you lay with this man still?” 

You shake your head and look down at your fingers as you twists them until they hurt, “just once. Only once. It was... unplanned. It wasn’t...” your voice cracks. 

His chest inflates with a sonorous breath, “did you want it?” 

“Pardon?” You murmur. 

“Unplanned... did you... was it... your tryst, was it willing?” 

You put your fist to your mouth and sob. You can’t say it. You won’t. You replay it in your head every night and you think of how you told him to stop and yet you did not stop him. You should have fought more. You should have screamed. 

“I didn’t make him stop,” you eke around your hand. 

“Make him? Did you ask him to begin?” 

“Please, sir, I cannot—please just end this and I will ask my father for the convent once more. I cannot bring this shame on you.” 

“Shame? Shame is the man, if I should call him that, who has done this,” he snarls and reaches for you, taking your hand. “I swore you would be my wife and I will hold to that. As you swore to be my wife. We will see the altar together. As one.” 

“You do not have to--” 

“I want to,” he growls and you look up at his angry face. You’ve never seen such fury in him. “I have never done anything but by my own whim and will not change that now.” 

“You are too nice, sir. Too nice, I cannot ask it--” 

“Who?” He sneers. 

“Sir?” 

“Who has done this to you?” 

“I cannot--” 

“I should know.” 

“No, please, I wouldn’t-- it would be my ruin--” 

“No, it would be his and you protect him still, so tell me.” 

“No, no I will not. That I cannot tell you, sir. To say it would defeat me completely.” 

He sighs into a snarls and lowers his chin. He sounds like a simmering bull, readying for the charge. You tug on your hand but he will not release you. You relent and let him cling to you. 

Silence, suffocating and still.  

“My brother was an orphan. We took him in when he was young. He is a duke, same as me, now,” he declares as he squares his posture. “You wouldn’t know the difference. And I won’t. Not between this child and our next.” 

“Sir, surely--” 

“We are to have a child,” he says, “that is happy news and I thank you for bringing me here to hear it.” He pets your hand and leans his arm against yours. He brings your fingers up to your mouth and kisses them, “one day, I will know who the culprit is and on that, I will surely split his skull. Not for his bastard, for that child has no sin, but for your honour, lady. For my wife’s honour.” 

💟

Cora’s wedding to Lord Rogers culminates in a grand luncheon. The bride is a beautiful mist of tears as she accepts the well wishes of her guests. She basks in the attention as you gladly languish in the shadows. 

Despite Lord Odinson’s unexpected and reassuring reaction, you’re still uncertain. You don’t know if he’s keeping a good face on until he knows how to act, perhaps renegs his grace, or if you might come to pay for your discretion later in your union. You’re prepared to meet your atonement, however it comes. 

As you sit for the meal, the chair beside you is claimed almost at once. Your betrothed has appeared throughout the event but you’ve hardly been at his side. Each time you see him, his eyes skim the crowd as if he can see right through every one of them. Yet, when he looks at you, you feel only warmth. You don’t understand how he can look at you as such. 

“How do you fare, today, my valkyrie?” He asks as he straightens his cravat, “you look well.” 

“Good, I think.” 

“Glad to hear it,” he raises his glass for a servant to fill it with sherry. You opt for lemon water, as much as your tumultuous stomach can handle. 

“I thought we might have our own reception at Nine Pillars,” he suggests. 

“I would like that,” you agree, your eyes drifting beyond him, to your father’s gardens, where... “whatever you may offer, I will be grateful for.” 

“Mighty valkyrie, full of grace,” he praises and reaches for a platter, “ooh, they have some sweet ham here with pineapple.” 

He takes a helping and puts it on your plate. You smell the tangy fruit and the underline savoury waft of the meat. You lurch and grasp the edge of the table. You give a panicked look to Odinson as he peers down at the food. He switches your plates out swiftly. 

“Tell me, what are you in the mind for then?” He leans in so his arm touches yours as you sip from the lemon water to quell your stomach. “Valkyrie, give me your command and I will obey.” 

You give him a coy grin, “you can be so silly.” 

“Silly. Mad. All for love,” he assures you.  

“Is their anything dry?” You ask, “bread, perhaps.” 

“Sourdough,” he reaches to take the basket as others help themselves to the spread. 

“I’ll have some of that.” 

“With marmalade?” He offers.  

“No,” your face pinches at the thought, “no, bread will do.” 

You blink and shake of another tide of sickness. As you do, your eyes meet another pair further down the table, amid the rabble of voices. Lord Rogers tilts his head as Cora tugs on his sleeve and giggles up at the couple behind them. He hardly seems to notice as he stares you down. 

You go rigid and quickly look away. You touch Odinson’s arm to keep from panicking. He looks at you, then down the table. He doesn’t say anything, merely carves off a chunk of bread for you. 

You pick away at the hard crust and the dry spongey inside. You take small bites, cautious of upsetting your volatile stomach. The afternoon wears on, course after course, and you avoid those dishes which threaten to overthrow your restraint. 

At last, the cake is serves, a tiered sponge with cream and fruit and candied sugar spun in a facsimile fountain atop it. It’s splended and beautiful. The couple are served first as they smiles in delight. The doling out of servings takes some time as guests wait patiently for their turn and the cake is pushed on a cart from chair to chair. 

When it comes your turn, your name rises over the crowd. You sit up and glance over, relieved at least not to watch the layers of custard and cake hit your plate. Lord Rogers has his hand on the back of his wife’s chair. 

“And how do you like the dessert? I believe you’ve been saving space for it all day, eh?” He chirps. 

You angle your head in confusion. You look down then at Odinson who sits a little taller as he leans forward. 

“You’ve hardly indulged, so I hope you might show your support and delight in this delectable dessert,” Rogers taunts. “A wedding is no place for a sour face.” 

Your lips part. You’re stunned. How could he be so bold as to call you out? Among all his guests and he must torment you. Was one night not enough. Your whole life as his violation thrives within your womb. Lord Odinson subtly touches your elbows. 

“I am most happy for you and my sister,” you rebuff, “and you are correct, I’ve been in much anticipation for dessert.” 

You take your fork and scoop up a heaping mouthful. You smile at it even as your insides rage. You make yourself taste it. It’s so sweet and smooth and wonderful, but your stomach mulches as if it is rubbish. Your cheeks tremble and you swallow, nearly gagging. 

“To you, sir, and my sister, Cora, I wish a happy marriage,” you force out as you hide your mouth behind a handkerchief. 

“To the happy couple,” Lord Odinson raises his glass and the table erupts, at once, the attention shifted back to them. 

You brace his arm and squeeze. You fight but you cannot withhold the uproar within. You stand and rush away, frantically searching for somewhere to hide and spew your guts. 

💟

The days overcome your doubts. The weeks come with more affectations; your sickness ebbs and flows and the temperature feels at times hotter then colder, swaying back forth, while some moments you spend with a throbbing head and pulsing feet. The most obvious symptom of your condition is the tightness of your stay. Soon, you will be showing more than you like, but for now, loosened laces can ease your discomfort. 

Your wedding day fast approaches. Time does seem to defy any human whim. You wish it would slow so you could catch your breath. Much like your husband-to-be who has yet to falter in his affections. 

You sit before the mirror with the grown of silver petals in your lap. There is one still bent from Cora’s envy but you will keep it to the back of your head. You will wear it as proudly as that night Lord Odinson gifted it to you. You hope for the day you might both forget all else. 

If it is to be. If he is at the altar waiting still. 

Albina and Hannah take the crown from you and secure it among your styled locks. Albina smiles at your reflection as Hannah jabs you with a pin. You nervously wring your hands as you admire the lavender shade of your gown. You wish you’d had more of it, that you hadn’t needed to trim it in ivory to make up for your height. Still, it is beautiful and the nicest dress you’ve ever worn. 

“Are you nervous?” Albina asks. 

“Suppose,” you admit and lift your chin, “very, truly.” Though not for the reason she might think. 

“Lord Odinson is kind. He should be gentle,” Hannah says. 

Your cheeks tinge at her suggestion, “sister.” 

“Well, it is what we are all thinking, isn’t it?” She shrugs. 

“I hope I do not find a husband so soon,” Albina adds, “I would like to enjoy my books a little longer.” 

“You might take on the spinster’s mantel then,” Hannah snipes. 

“It shouldn’t be so bad,” you murmur. “Every woman must do it. Eventually. It cannot be so horrible.” 

You lower your head again, trying to hide the emotion battling in your chest. It was bad, that first time. Lord Rogers hadn’t been kind at all. Would Lord Odinson be any different? For Rogers seemed kind at first glance only to be cruel upon touch. 

What if you husband did not want to meet his duty? What if he could not knowing you had lain with another? You would not blame him and without consummation, he might still turn you away. 

“Cora said it was more painful than anything she’s ever felt,” Hannah undercuts your dread. “Though she still loves her husband well.” 

“You shouldn’t speak of that,” you gird. 

“Why not? Won’t you tell us how it is so we may be ready?” She challenges. 

“I... I... It’s rather strange to speak of it.” 

“You are strange,” Hannah retorts with a huff. 

“But pretty,” Albina chimes, “look at you, sissie. You truly look like a queen in that crown.” 

You meet the gaze of your reflection. You do look better than you ever have before. You wonder if they notice the new fullness in your cheeks. If they do, they don’t mention it. You take a deep breath. 

“I shouldn’t keep them waiting any longer,” you stand.  

If you wait any longer, you might lose your nerve. 

The bishop waits in the grand hall of Nine Pillars as you emerge from the rooms allotted for your preparations. The crowd stands among the columns and hushes as you appear at the end of the hall. You face the clergy man and for an instant, your heart dangles precariously, ready to plummet.  

Where is Lord Odinson? 

His golden head pops up beside the bishop and he fixes the flower tucked into his lapel. His long blond hair is draw back as a scarlet bow holds it back, its ears peeking out behind his nape. He is smiling as he pauses and his eyes meet yours across the space. 

You can see even from there how his features slacken and for a moment, you are breathless. He looks as stricken. You put one foot down and let your long legs carry you. 

All your doubts float away. The faces around you haze together and the world crumbles to dust. It's only you and that man.  

💟

The ceremony gives way to a soiree, bodies clustered together, partners dancing, and you among them. Your husband, a husband, has your hand in his as he leads you in the steps. This man, this wonderful forgiving man you vowed yourself too nearly sweeps you off your feet, a sensation you've never known before. 

Your cheer blooms from you as his cheeks flush in his excess. He barely pauses to receive kind words from his guest. His elation is contagious. It gives no way to your fears. 

"Do you know what I thought upon the altar, beautiful valkyrie," he purrs, "I nearly fell upon my knees even." 

"What?" You smile, glowing up at him. 

"That the gods did bless me. That you must be sent from them, a gift to me, mere mortal." 

You can't help but pat his chest, "you flatter." 

"You are too modest," he guides you along, "you are a statue come too life, art in the flesh." 

"My husband... you words are too sweet." 

"I know, I know, the wedding night is still ahead of us, I do run too fast," he chuckles, "but how can I help the anticipation? 

Your lashes flick and giggle, "husband." 

"That word has never sounded sweeter," he grins, "but a sweeter noise might be my own name. Say it for me, valkyrie." 

Your cheeks burn hot, "Thor?" 

"Delicious," he growls nearly baring his teeth, "and I shall savour every sound you make. Every moan and mewl. Every breath and laugh. Just as every part of you." 

It's too good to be true. You deign to let yourself feel it all but you must. If even only for tonight. If only for the next moment. You will have a morsel of happiness if it's all you have to chew on for the rest of your life. 

💟

The night wears on and so do you. Your feet ache, as does most of you, and your voice is raw from laughing and talking. It is the first that you ever spent an event not along the wall or hiding in some shadow. It is a night all your own, or so your husband has made it feel. 

Yet, he does not tire. Not as quickly. As he booms and bawls to the amusement of all, you cling to his arm and repress a yawn. You will not spoil his fun, you will persist. 

Still, you cannot ignore all urges of your humanity. You press a hand to his sleeve and excuse yourself, promising to return. Your husband pauses to bid you not be long and you're further abashed at his attention. 

You flit off to find the privy. You've been several times over the day. Your bladder swells no matter how little you drink. As you progress, you find your body is contradictory to your mind. 

You venture down the corridor and sweep into the room. Once relieved, you emerge feeling lighter but no less tired. The silent desolation of the corridor rather makes your exhaustion all the more potent. 

You turn towards the statue of a warrior, you recognise it, it is the means by which you've found your way. Before you can pass it, a figure appears from behind it and you falter in your slippers. 

You gasp and ball your hands, the man before you sending a ripple of horror through you as he smirks at your surprise. Lord Rogers' cheek dimples as he quorks his head like a cynical crow. 

"You are ever a creature of urges," he muses, "fluttering back and forth as a skittish bird." 

"My lord, I... what is the meaning--" 

"I'm afraid we've not had much of a chance to speak, have we? The blushing bride is much a titter," he chortles, "she has the gull to giggle like a maiden, even." 

"Lord Rogers," you utter, appalled. 

"But the sway of her hips do betray her true nature. That which is within her," he sneers, "as does the curdling of her face over any dish that tickles her nose." 

"Sir, I know not what you mean--" 

"I should laugh truly, to know that another will raise my bastard," he taunts, "that it is him, does entertain me more." He takes a step forward and you back, "so you will be certain to lay with him this night so he may believe he has vigour." He grabs your arms before you can elude him, "you will think of me, won't you, Athena, my fallen goddess? Of how I desecrated your--" 

Suddenly, you are staggered. Lord Rogers is swung backward and flung into the statue. There's a roar, tha same noise you would expect of a charging bear, and the flash of scarlet. You watch paralysed as Thor grabs Lord Rogers by his jacket and spins him, throwing him into the other wall. 

The smaller of the men, though they are both built well, slides to one knee, his hand on the plaster. The other is quick, wasting not a second before aims a foot into Rogers' stomach. The duke falls backward and is at once straddled beneath the larger. 

Thor lays blows upon the other man, hailing down on him like the tempest he claims himself. Your fear overflows and you push through the thick waves. You come forward numbly and pull your husband by the back of his collar.  

"Please sir, unhand him." 

"You would defend this animal!" He wails down another fist and growls. 

"No, no, I would not spare him but I would... I would have my husband not take me to my wedding night with bloodied knuckles. Thor," you pet the back of his head, "let this be a happy day. Please." 

He sits back on his heels and puffs out. He looks back at you as you step away. You put your hand to your middle.  

"Husband?" 

He snarls and spits on Lord Rogers, standing with a huff. You reach for his hand and he takes it. He squeezes as he sends one last kick of his toe to the man on the floor. 

"Let me save my strength for you, wife. I certainly would need it." 

[its-callum-everybody]

I CANNOT DRAW. That’s how I’m starting this off. So I, sadly, cannot give you all the visuals for this lovely woman. However! What I can give you all is a In-depth analysis of her character and Creation! Of course, we’ll be breaking this into parts.

Part 1 — Basic Character Information / Relationships

Part 2 — Everything to do with her Unique Magic

Part 3 — Lore

Part 4 — Appearance

PART 1 ➤

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Name: Cyrielle [No Known Last Name]

Name Meaning: Lordly

Nicknames: Ce-Ce [Cater], Killifish-Chan [Floyd], Madame Profiterole [Rook], Yam [Vil], Henchman/Second-in-Command [Grim (she got ranked up)], Little Imp [Sam]

Age: Presumably 17

Height: 5 foot 8 inches or 173 cm

Weight: Never ask a lady this [146 lbs]

Gender: Female

Birthday: 8/18

Star Sign: Leo

Hair Color: Charcoal Black

Eye Color: Dark Grey

Sexuality: Undetermined

— (•) —

Dominate Hand: Right

Favorite Food: Breakfast Sandwich

Least Favorite Food: Pickled Eggs

Likes: Aesthetically pleasing things, being right

Dislikes: Dark Chocolate, amnesia

Hobbies: Dancing

Talent: Sword-Fighting

— (•) —

Year: 1st

Dorm: Ramshackle

Class | Student No.: 1-B | 34

Best Class: History

Favorite Class: Practical Magic

Club: N/A

Favorite Teacher: Sam (If that counts)

— 1st Years

Ace: Best Friend #1

Deuce: Best Friend #2

Jack: Mutual Respect. Don’t say their friends, understood to be friends.

Epel: He goes to her to get Junk Food and she happily feeds him. Friends.

Sebek: Begrudging Friends. She takes care of him like a stray cat and he complains while accepting it.

— 2nd Years

Riddle: Friendly Divorced Co-Parents of ADeuce.

Azul: Would smite him on sight with the sweetest smile on her face. He fears her. Slightly calmer after his over-bolt. Slightly.

Jade: Neutral. Can have decent conversation.

Floyd: Try to kill each other while smiling and laughing. Friends.

Ruggie: Hated him during Book 2 but they’re actually pretty chill afterwards. If they see each other in the halls, he tries to make her laugh by making someone do something weird with his magic.

Kalim: She’s number One sunshine protector. Was one-hundred percent ready to fist fight Jamil during his over bolt if she had too.

Jamil: Pre-book four, they were at a neutral standing. During his overbolt she was fully ready to just rock him. Post-overbolt, they’re very quiet around each other but nice. She sometimes just goes to Scarabia to sit there while he cooks.

Silver: She’s very nice to him and he doesn’t understand why. He woke up from a nap one day with his hair braided and a blanket over him. The only reason he knew it was her was because some birds told him. So he tries to be polite back but genuinely has no clue why she’s so nice and it freaks him out. She likes him.

— 3rd Years

Cater: Made a Separate Magic-cam account called ‘Cyrielle’s Adventures’ which focuses on him introducing Cyrielle to TWST pop culture and its a hilarious mess. Cater proclaims them BFF’s.

Trey: Dorm-Dad TM. She may not be in Heartslabyul but she’s always a welcome guest. When she comes over, she sits on the counter while Trey bakes. He lets her stir and eat the leftover batter.

Leona: One she actually did end up punching during his over bolt. She couldn’t stand him before or afterwards. During book three when he begrudgingly helped her and Grim though she loosened up. She can respect his intelligence though. Kingscholar would be more admirable if he had a bit of tenacity.

Vil: He kind of annoyed her pre-overbolt, after the over-bolt she did felt some level of sympathy for him. To always be the villain. That fact alone resonated with her for some reason those she can’t recall why.

Rook: He makes her uncomfortable. She can put up with him, but whenever she knows he’s nearby she can’t seem to let her guard down.

Idia: She didn’t really have any sort of feelings towards him before book 6. After book six though he ended up getting punched, then an awkward head pat. Needless to say He’s awkward around her and she ends up trying to nicer in the end. Even if he just runs away from her half the time.

Lilia: He caught her when she was covering Silver with a blanket and was sworn to secrecy. He knows very well about her crush and casually likes to drag Silver into spending time with him, find her, then leave them together.

Malleus: She invited him in to have tea one day and he ordained her and Silver’s wedding at that moment (because of course Lilia told him everything). Both can be the Yapper to the others Listener. Lilia forces him to play matchmaker too. So he casually tries to tell her about what Silver likes. He’s not good at trying to hint at it but he’s trying.

— Other

Grim: Her son. Will defend him with her life and soul. Do not touch her boy.

Ortho: She gets sad when she looks at him, even before book six. Something about a child that isn’t fully a child because they aren’t a person… it reminds her of someone she can never seem to remember. So she likes to treat him like a little kid even if he can do almost anything with his robotic abilities.

— Staff

Crowley: Fresh-out-of-Jail Uncle and Put-him-back Niece.

Crewel: There is blatant favoritism towards her and Vil. He does not hide it.

Vargas: Takes it easy on her in gym class because she’s one of the only girls; he watched her pick up Jack one time with no struggle and still does this.

Trein: She stays after his class sometimes to ask more questions about history. Lucius likes to chill in her lap during this time. Grandpa vibes.

Sam: Literally her adoptive dad.

[that-sweet-almond]

The Story That Wrote Itself

@dukexietyweek 2024 Day 7 - Supervillain + Stuffed Animals

Word Count: 6122 (Ao3)

Rating: T

Characters: Remus, Virgil, Janus, Mrs. FluffyBottoms

Pairing: Dukexiety

Warnings: spiders, sexual dialogue, self aware narrator, Villain Janus, mentions of violence; i really dont know if I'm missing anything

Taking upon himself to tell the tale of how Duke defeated the slithering villain terrorizing this realm and the next, our smart, ambitious narrator recounts his most harrowing adventure yet using a whole lot of inappropriate language, in this refreshing new take on expectations and how to (not) write for a prompt fill.

Once upon a time, in a land far far away, there was a kingdom made of stitches and magic, and that nameless kingdom was ruled by a small stuffed pickle. Yes, you read that correctly. Standing at a proud 12 inches in height, Duke was the chosen name of the squishmallow that the narrator was only now realizing didn’t fit the prompt he was trying to complete, so he was now retroactively deciding that, deep down, this little ball of delightful softness had been a raccoon or a skunk before being cursed to live the life of a boringly shaped plushie. Duke was certainly much more special than an uninteresting collector’s item bound to spend his shortly numbered years choking on dust. To prove his uniqueness and originality, he had a charming brown mustache that he had personally sewn into the green fabric of his velvety body, and all of the deliciousness of a real pickle, if you liked to sink your teeth into that kind of thing. His insides were pillowy and pure, and the marks of his curation were tattooed into his skin with carefully placed embroidered lines, following the curves of his naturally round body. Lastly, a dashing stem sat at the top of his head, curled handsomely to compliment his permanent winking face.

Before his rise to fame, Duke was nothing more than a pickle with a dream, which only made him an even more special toy in that sense: he wished to be cuddled by the broodiest, most frightening knight of all the land, a tall human with vibrant purple hair. You see, he was from another realm, a dark chasm many moons away from the Duke’s hometown, a place from where no other plushie had ever returned, and with no legs to allow him to embark on such a journey, the pickle could only fantasize about seeing his fair complexion once he came to visit their brightly lit country.

Mrs. FluffyBottoms, the floppy bunny that had come to be their president, was always greeted by the tall human whenever he appeared to cloud their twinkling lights, but it wasn’t without a price. Love had worn through the stitches of their limbs, darkened her once white fur, and Duke shivered at the thought of being so obviously cherished by the knight’s large, crushing arms, so visibly claimed to anyone that put their buttons on his rounded figure.

Of course, not every plushie agreed with him, and the public opinion of the dark emo met its demise one later afternoon. Mrs. FluffyBottoms was one of their oldest members, a stuffy that had stopped being produced somewhere in the 80’s, and in a town composed mostly of younger, softer citizens, her old years stuck out like a stained paw. Her stuffing was beat up and frail, gathered on her fingerless hands and feet for stability, but their movements were getting more and more clumsy each day, and everyone knew they wouldn’t last much longer.

And then his muse had appeared, like a storm cloud on a hot summer day. Muttering inaudible grumbles to the other plushies of their realm, he had swiftly captured Mrs. FluffyBottoms, wrapping his long, pale fingers around her emptying torso, only to melt himself into the blades of the carpet, taking her down the portal only the humans could access. Chaos ruled for many days, their president’s kidnapping affecting the older plushies the hardest, thinking they were to be next, their sleeping hours haunted by the thoughts of what the villain’s hands would do to them, but the sexy pickle knew better. Trusting in the tall human with all of the magic stored in his white insides, Duke had awaited by the outskirts of town for his return, secretly cursing Mrs. FluffyBottoms for taking his rightful place.

When all hope was lost, a man had come to appease the gentry. He was different from his dark knight, his voice higher and more gentle, eyes framed with glass and body decorated by the colors of the human skies. For these attributes, Chocolate, a tiny stuffed puppy, had deemed this fellow their temporary leader, the carrier of a prophecy, and the collective hatred and delirium of the plushies of the town had somehow created an epic story about how one of them would soon be selected to save their lives from the tyranny of Mrs. FluffyBottoms’ kidnapper.

Duke paid them no mind, impatiently spending his days looking out into the horizon, past their mountainous book piles and the wooden gateway that led to his knight’s realm, longing for the day when he would arrive to whisk him away too.

It was one such day, his pickle body full of aching at the thought of never seeing him again, when the prophecy came true.

The lights were out in their little town, which meant many toys were sleeping, except for our beloved food shaped stuffie. Stubbornly awaiting by the outskirts of the realm, Duke wobbled in place, thinking about how to overcome his massive boredom. Most of the other plushies didn’t enjoy his company, and it was only partially because he had no mouth that he could use to communicate with them. In his most desperate moments, Duke was known to get awfully chummy with anything sharp enough to cut through fabric, but fate always stopped him before he could tear a speaking hole through his own face, usually in the form of their savior rolling around and stealing the pair of scissors or the pocket knife that Duke had already stollen from him to begin with.

Once you were known for your mildly creepy, silent antics, there was really no going back.

Casting his single eye upon the closed gateway, Duke wondered about the other realms of their world for what felt like the millionth time. The humans ought to take it for granted, exploring distances that would take him days of travel, and although he could not feel exhaustion, on the count of not having any muscles, tedium sounded just as painful as the figurative leg cramps.

Distracting him from the phantom sensation of curling and uncurling one’s toes, Duke suddenly caught sight of a shadow moving just out of the corner of his eye. As he turned to inspect it, the darkness stilled, leaving his pickle body feeling restless and uneasy; emotions that could not help him as he was inevitably attacked. His assailant, as black as the night, aimed right for his face, and Duke thought to scream in his overly conscious mind, as if anyone could hear him besides himself. It was an amazing outlet for the growing tension nestling inside his cushy insides.

- Keep it down, will you? – hissed the jumping shadow, several soft paws sticking to his fabric.

Oh Gods, you can hear me?!, Duke immediately squealed to himself, high on delirious adrenaline, Before my power runs dry, I want a mouth and a seven inch—

- Shh! – demanded the infinite darkness that was still clinging to his face. – I’m just me, I’m not—I’m not a God, let alone several.

Oh.

He couldn’t help but be a little disappointed about that.

You know no one else can hear me, right? You should really think twice before picking your targets.

- Targets? Plural?

Well, you’re covering my eye for a reason, aren’t you?

- Sure, let’s go with that – something brushed against Duke’s forehead, a suspiciously skittish energy sparking from the other’s repetitive movements. – I just need some information. I wasn’t trying to go for your eye…

And with that short explanation, the shadow crawled upwards, comfortably resting on top of the pickle’s head and granting him back his vision.

- That old bunny that is always around, has it returned?

Old bunny? You mean Mrs. Fluffybottoms?

- … what kind of a name is—Why am I asking, I don’t care – the multiple paws resting where Duke’s eye couldn’t reach shuffled around, barely weighting enough for his squishy body to sag. – Yes, I guess I mean her.

Well, I haven’t seen her, the plushie answered, doing his best to mimic what his voice might sound like if he had shoulders that he could shrug with. A sexy human showed up and whisked her away! I’ve been waiting for him to come back, actually.

A prolonged silence followed Duke’s incredibly useful and honest answer, and if the narrator had to guess, it was because Mister Fuzzy Paws was far too impressed by his story telling abilities to immediately remember how to speak before such grandiosity.

Finally, just as the little pickle gathered his focus to think another line of dialogue, the shadow spoke up.

- She’s not in his room. I was hoping she would have walked by her own foot back to her house…

Either she got lost on the way or they were kidnapped again.

- Again? No, I didn’t—I mean, t-the human told her where they were going.

He did??

- What’s this about kidnapping… Why can’t I have a moment of peace.

His unaddressed mumbling clearly wasn’t trying to evoke an actual answer from Duke, but this was the longest anyone had spoken to him in weeks, and the rush of happiness bouncing around his soft insides had him too giddy to remain quiet.

What’s your name? Mine is Duke. I was found on a parking lot by the side of a busy road during a thunderstorm. My story before that was pretty boring, actually. I think I was being sold at a Target before—

- Woah, slow down, I can barely understand you – the multiple points of contact between them detached and attached to him just as restlessly as Duke’s plushy guts were feeling, like thousands of micro head pats moving with the intent of calming the both of them down. – What do you even want my name for?

Well, we’re buddies now! I can’t keep calling you a shadow.

- Shadow? I’m not even—

What are you then? I can’t exactly tilt my head back, make you fall and then bend over you so that my eye can see your likeness. I mean, I can, but I don’t want to.

- How generous of you… – the not shadow scoffed.

You’re evading my questions! I answered yours, you gotta answer mine.

- Okay, okay, jeez…

Falling silent after relenting, his new friend ever so gently crawled down the right side of his body, his stiff fur brushing against his velvety fabric, until all of his paws were on the carpet, a single second of silence stretching out between them until the eagerness overcame everyone’s favorite Duke. His dismounted buddy had front row seats for all the wonderous ways in which his sexy pickle could move, his jaunty twists and vigorous jumps turning his soft body around until he was face to face with the other.

Eight beady eyes shimmered in the darkness, attached to an unmoving, surprisingly hairy creature. It was not a toy, Duke could tell as much, but exactly what it was, he didn’t have a clue. Short in height but large in length, his nameless companion easily blended with the background of their nightly realm, the color of his body nowhere near as flashy as Duke’s vibrant green goodness. Further focusing on his features, the pickle could pick apart his multiple paws, counting at least ten long limbs, until the two dangling from what was probably his face shifted, as if brushing against each other, and something about the gesture discarded that kind of characterization for those two specific appendages.

Something to ask about when he wasn’t so utterly mesmerized by the sight in front of him.

- I’m… I’m a tarantula.

What’s that?

- Uhm, it’s like. It’s like a hairy spider.

Ooh!, Duke bounced in place, his very smart brain recognizing that word, The savior hates those, you better be careful.

- The savior? – the tarantula asked, his paws tucking closer to his torso.

Yea! He’s the tall human that talks to us sometimes. He controls our sun and has been ruling over the land ever since Mrs. Fluffybottoms got taken.

- Good thing the “sun” is out then…

How he went about signaling quotation marks with just his mouth, the narrator has no idea, but it is a fact that it happened, and that this story is all the more believable because of it. You cannot not trust the writer’s word on this. Even if it was too dark for him to see what was going on.

Don’t worry about the big guy, he wouldn’t hurt a fly! At least not intentionally. He couldn’t help himself once, and I saw him grabbing one with his tongue, but he was so upset about it afterwards that he hugged all of us! Even me!!

- That’s, uh… That’s reassuring, I guess.

And I could protect you, in a pinch. I know this town like the back of my hand!

- You don’t have hands.

Would you have preferred if I said that I know it like the back of my ass? Cuz that’s what I wanted to go with, but it’s too dark to see if your reaction to it would be funny.

- And too dark to see your ass – the spider grumbled, clearly displeased with the idea.

In truth, the darkness was not an issue, because everybody knows tarantulas were the most active at night, so the question was not if he could see it, but why he wasn’t reacting to the fact that the squishy pickle had butt cheeks.

So yea, it was dark, but it hardly mattered. Unless they suddenly embarked on a quest to rescue Mrs. Fluffybottoms. With Duke’s general lack of body parts that could sense pain and his buddy’s feisty persona, they would be an unstoppable duo. Of course, that’s where the plot was headed, once these two stop trying to take over their own predetermined destiny.

But narrator, I hear you ask, how is any of this possible? How is a spider talking, and how is a squishmallow communicating telepathically? And to that I say, you’re the one that clicked on this story, so you don’t get to question the crazy expressions of creativity!

On a lighter note, how else would this narrative unfold? How would we ever know what drives our delicious pickle forward? I can only do so much, recounting his tale and transcribing his thoughts. The rest is magic, embedded onto the fibers of his being, from that pesky curse that I told you about at the beginning! See, I knew I’d make it come full circle.

- Anyways, I really have no reason to stick around, so… I better get going.

Something close to panic clawed low on Duke’s plushie insides.

Wait, why are you leaving?! Weren’t you looking for Mrs. Fluffybottoms??

- And I am – the tarantula shifted around, and only then did the pickle realize that he had yet to be given a name. – But she’s not here, so like I said. No reason to stick around.

Can you take me with you? Duke twisted into himself, hopping a few inches closer to his fleeing friend. You might have to carry me if you’re in a hurry, but I’m really light. I barely weight a thing!

- And why would I do that?

Because we’re friends now. Because I don’t want to be abandoned this quickly ever again. Sad, pitying notions for such a graceful little stuffy, but something that was also threated into the fibers of his being, alongside that magic. One might say it was the reason why it was cast in the first place.

Well, you clearly don’t know what you’re doing. You didn’t even know her name! How are you going to find her if you don’t know where to look for?

- I know where to look, that’s why I’m here – the spider growled, defensive of his methods despite the obvious flaws they held. – I don’t need your help.

What if you wanted my help? Hm? I know I want to offer it.

Duke skipped closer to the disgruntled tarantula, following after his scramming paws.

- I’m good, thanks.

What about a travel buddy? A walking tune singer? You don’t even have to pay me!

- I don’t have money, even if you did deserve to get paid.

So you recognize my services are worthy a penny!, Duke excitedly counteracted, And! Mrs. Fluffbottoms is like me. Her mouth is a line of stitches that she can’t open, so she talks through gestures. You’ll need a translator once we find her.

- Are you serious? – the spider sighed, which was an incredibly impressive feat since Duke didn’t know he had lungs, and finally stopped walking, sparing him a few short seconds to catch up.

I swear on my stem!

His eight black eyes did not blink, or move, from what Duke was able tell, but he could feel the tarantula’s gaze scanning him up and down, goosebumps breaking through his smooth fabric like hands changing the direction of his filaments, leaving his body rough and patchy under the attention.

- I’m not even going to ask…

Turning his face away from him, he added.

- Fine, I guess you can—

And that was how Duke first came to learn about the sensation of someone trying to take a bite out of him. In his anticipation for the trip ahead, he could not be blamed for how he skipped in place, eagerly squealing to himself, but soon he found that the small jumps were not enough to disperse the prickling attaching to his insides, that bigger leaps would be needed if he wanted to calm down. And one of those leaps just so happened to be in his friend’s general direction, which just so happened to make him land right on top of said friend. Powered by anxiety and startled confusion, the tarantula’s body moved on its own, mouth cracking open as his pedipalps parted, attaching themselves to the fabric of his green attacker before his fangs rapidly sunk into his fiber flesh.

To say it was an unpleasant experience would be an understatement. Duke’s taste was what he imagined carpets to be like, dust and all, and that was ignoring the completely sensory overwhelm of his soft fabric directly brushing against his fangs. His outer layer was thin and malleable, somehow untearable, so the tarantula simply found himself sinking his teeth further and further into him until he had a mouthful of pillowy material, and none of the satisfaction of shredding through something. And as if it wasn’t bad enough, he could hear Duke laughing.

That- It, It tickles!, he said, in between chocking on his own giggles and trying to escape from the bite, Do I taste good?

Taking that as an opportunity to overrule his own instincts, the spider spit him out, pedipalps frantically rubbing in front of his face, wanting to reach inside of his mouth to rid it of the disgusting feeling that still nestled inside of that cavity and being unable to.

- No. That was a warning. Don’t touch me if you don’t want to be bitten again.

Jeez, you’re no fun, Duke shivered, seemingly shaking off the sensation of nearly being skewered before fluffing himself back to full volume. Lead the way! I can’t promise that I won’t try to scare you again if you let boredom catch up to us tho.

Either properly threatened by that response or desperately trying to run away from the crazy unkillable pickle, his nameless companion took to walking in the direction of the gateway, promptly slipping through a crack in it that was surprisingly big enough for the both of them to pass through, and finding themselves on the other side, the spider wasted no time on sightseeing, promptly making a sharp left turn. The Carpeted Fields were not as exciting as Duke had always pictured them, perhaps because it was so late into the night that he couldn’t see much of anything, but the air smelled different out here, even his friend’s skittering sounding unlike what it did back in his hometown.

So where are we going? I’ve never been out here before.

- There’s only one other place where Mrs. FluffySomething could be – the spider hissed, this time not so literally, his deep voice lowered on the account of the unpredictable dangers of their perilous travel. -  I thought to check it first, but it was too risky.

Ooh, a challenge! I love challenges! Were you afraid of getting smooshed? Is that why you didn’t go in there?

Duke tried to contract the right places in his rounded body to make himself do a little happy skip, but he ended up landing a bit more clumsily than he had intended, so really, it just looked like he had tripped on himself somehow. It distracted his travel buddy for long enough that he forgot what they were talking about to begin with.

- I just needed to make sure I wasn’t putting my life on the line for nothing.

You’re really lucky I’m not some sort of plushie serial killer. Or a guard.

- Your town has those? – the tarantula asked for the sake of the conversation, the hint of disbelief in his voice revealing his genuine opinion on the matter.

What, guards or serial killers?

- Both? Either??

Well, I’ve never personally seen either, but that’s usually what the other toys call me. And I’ve never actually murdered any of them yet! You catch a guy with a pocket knife once and suddenly you’re more dangerous than the golden stabby statues that think they are better than everyone! I don’t see them talking either, and they’ve never been accused of tearing through plushies with their mighty shiny hands!

- … have you actually done that? Use, uh, a pocket knife to…

No! I just like weapons!! Can’t a guy have a special interest in peace without being framed for toyslaughter?!

Amidst his bubbling rage, a quiet sound broke him out of his furious ranting, and even though the pickle had no ears with which he could strain his hearing, he did it anyways, only to realize that he was chasing after a very airy sound, like short gasps, or a really breathy laugh. The thought that it might be the last option suddenly made Duke’s insides feel a little more warm, cozy instead of uncomfortably hot.

- Well, too bad I’m not travelling with a killer. Guess I’ll have to be the one to attack any enemies.

Now, I didn’t say that! I can kill things! I just didn’t want you to freak out on me.

The airy sound grew a little louder, the rasping more intentional, and the giggles pouring out of the spider made Duke wish he had as many arms as he did, so he could jump on top of him and hug him with all of them.

- I guess I appreciate that – his nameless friend stopped his laughter to say, his voice still retaining a hint of a smile. – You’re not scared? That there might be enemies?

Why would I be? My body is an indestructible fortress!!

Before there could be any kind of reaction, a mysterious creak echoed through The Carpeted Fields. Immediately, Duke felt like they were being watched, like their harmless conversation had summoned their first boss fight, and his single eye jumped from the tarantula to the endless darkness that stood beyond him, waiting for something to happen.

Raising a single paw in the air, his friend silently told him to wait.

- A door opened. – he explained after excruciatingly long seconds of stillness. – We’re walking into a trap.

Well, isn’t it a good thing that it’s open? That means we get to kill them faster!

- … you can’t sense tension, can you?

Romantic tension?

- N- No—

Cuz sometimes it’s pretty obvious, but most of the time it is not directed at me, so maybe that’s why it seems—

- No, I’m not talking about that! – the spider aggressively hushed, one of his back paws sticking to the fabric of his mustache before tugging him closer. – It doesn’t matter. Just go ahead, check the coast for me.

I mean, only if we get to keep holding hands like this.

- Neither of us have hands.

I’m accepting that as a yes.

- No, wait—

With a surprising amount of strength, Duke folded the top half of his pickle body over the fuzzy paw, and without further hesitation, shimmied ahead, forcing the tarantula to keep up with him as they crossed through The Carpeted Fields. A mild breeze blew past them, and assuming the realm they were invading worked just like the one where he came from, Duke took to following the wind, accepting it as guidance of where to turn amongst the darkness. Soon, they were upon another gateway, the touch of the air moving both the blades inside and outside of the kingdom that nestled past it, so he surged forward without a second thought, searching for the window that had brought them this far.

Only a few jumps in, and his friend’s theory turned out to be correct. With a harsh bang, the door closed behind them, trapping them inside, and the paw he had been holding finally found a way to escape, ripping away from his fabric before scurrying across the darkness.

- Welcome. I have been expecting you. – a smooth, sultry voice spoke, accompanied by the familiar sound of fabric brushing against fabric. – I ssssee that you even brought a friend with you! How adorable.

The text book villain expertly slithered through the night, inciting fear in the hearts of the citizens of this realm with such a simple string of words. Barely kept away from view, Duke could sense the presence of thousands of eyes sticking to him, mortified into submission in the presence of this sexy, unseen threat, but like the brave pickle that he was, he refused to back down now that he was here, standing a little straighter before the incoming danger.

- Won’t either of you sspeak to me? How crasssss. And here I was hoping for some company after ever so graciously allowing you both inside.

At least invite me for dinner first.

The shadows stilled, started into motionless obscurity. The pouting villain quickly recovered his resolve, the quiet brushing returning to scare away the silence, but Duke knew exactly what he was doing. He was trying to locate them by voice alone. Too bad the projection of his thoughts was magical, and therefore, not affected by the distance possibly separating them.

- Who ssaid that?

The friend! The name’s Duke. I’d go and shake your hand but you know, can’t see a thing in front of my mustache unless you turn on a couple of lights.

- How odd. I never knew someone could… sspeak like you do.

Silence reigned for the briefest of moments, the curiosity veiled behind those words telling Duke it was only polite to allow the other to continue talking. Of course, the villain thought our amazing pickle had more to say as well, so their miscommunication rendered them both befuddlingly speechless for a couple of seconds.

- Well – the attractive voice muttered after that moment had passed, audibly clearing his throat. – I shall turn on a few lights then.

With a soft woosh, magic traveled across the land, fulfilling his promise. From his spot on the floor, Duke felt a gentle breeze caress his soft fabric before the realm was reborn with light, the large, scented candles placed on mountainous shelves and across a desk flickering to life, nothing more than shy flames hiding behind frosted glass. The glow that they provided was dim and controlled, only further contributing to the whole villainous persona that the hissing voice was cultivating, but the narrator knew it was all an act, a cover for their unthreatening appearance.

Hiding amongst the shadows, Duke found a long, slithering body slowly slipping behind the fallen covers of the unmade bed.

- And whatever are you supposed to be, Duke? – the strangely kind criminal asked, his hissing minimal. – I have never seen such a round… mysterious shape like yourself before.

Isn’t it obvious?? I’m a pickle!

- A pickle? – amusement sparkled across the room in the form of boisterous laughter, sharp and distinct like a good villain laugh should be. – Well, you certainly are a treat to my old button eyes.

Oh, don’t sell yourself short! You’re just as delicious as me, I bet.

- … That, iss an opinion, I won’t be refuting. – the dismembered voice mumbled, a small, moving fold cautiously appearing over by the edge of the bed. – Why are you here, little pickle? I can’t see why Virgil would ever find himself in such pleasant company.

Virgil?

- That awfully rude spider that you dragged in here – he continued, a thin pink tongue cutting through the air manifesting a strangely human hiss. – Always sssticking his paws where they don’t belong!

Well, he….

Duke forgot the words that his mouth had formed to say next, too perplexed by what his eye was seeing to function. From the height of the tall mattress, a long yellow snake revealed himself to him, his small black eyes cut into sharp, menacing half circles, sewn at a fear inducing angle. His fuzzy toy body had no scales, not even those that were ironed over fabric and that peeled away over time, and at the top of his snake head, a tiny bowler hat rested, giving him quite a dapper look, for somebody that was entirely naked besides that.

- Even he knows he sshouldn’t be here – the reptilian villain hissed softly, calmly sliding alongside the edge of the bed. – Honestly, leaving his friend alone for me to monologue to? How… utterly convenient.

The pointy end of his tail whipped across the air, colliding against something Duke couldn’t see from where he was standing, but the venomous hiss that followed was far too familiar for him not to recognize it, not to chase after. Caught around his smooth, strong coils, the tarantula that had escaped from Duke’s side was baring his fangs at the snake, all of his eight eyes glaring at the slimy villain.

- D’aww, there’s no need for that kind of behavior, Virgil – he mocked, his neck raising away from the bed until his dark shadow was just as long and menacing as him. – We wouldn’t want for anything bad to happen to you, would we?

- Fuck you!!

- Gasp, you offend me. After all of the things I did for you, this is how you treat me.

From the floor, Duke saw the snake’s body tightening around Virgil, one of his hairy legs frantically jerking in the air as his fangs lunged for the yellow fabric trapping him. The villain cocked his head to the side, but otherwise didn’t react.

- Really? How many times have you tried to do that in the past?

Virgil didn’t answer, simply biting down onto him with even more strength than before.

- Ouch – the snake flatly enunciated, nearing the top half of his body closer to where the rest of him was gathered. – Could you stop?

Listen, you’re really sexy and stuff, but we didn’t come here to have that kinda fun with you.

-… Pardon?

Isn’t that what’s happening right now?, Duke moved his eye from the snake to the spider, You’re acting like the mean, scary dom that wants to overpower the other mean, scary dom? I mean, doesn’t seem like his tarantula butt is interested in you other than how you’re related to Mrs. Fluffybottoms, so—

A loud, angry hiss cut through his ongoing reasoning, splitting through the other plushie’s mouth with such a foul temper that the black inside that he normally kept hidden was visible to everybody in the room.

- This is ridiculousss! And here I thought I could convince you to join my sside once you saw how pathetic this sspider issss. – the snake raised Virgil in the air by his tail, the damp spot of venom progressively darkening the yellow fabric there making it seem like the villain had had a little bit of an incident. – Instead, you come looking for that unworthy bunny that keeps getting in my way!

For a dreadful moment, Duke thought he was about to launch Virgil towards the ground, hurling him to his very real, very painful death, but the expressions on his black button eyes sobered up, and the tension stiffening up his tail eased somewhat, though not enough for the tarantula to wiggle away from. Trapped and humiliated, there wasn’t much energy left in his legs to push through this tremendously foiled plan.

- Couldn’t you have made me look any more useless? – Virgil suddenly asked, shattering right through the narrator’s rock solid focus.

- Why are you reading over my shoulder? I thought I told you to web Mrs. Fluffbottoms to the ceiling of the canopy bed!

- And I did that like, five minutes ago – he huffed, shoving his hands inside of the big pockets of his hoodie. – What are you even writing?

- Oh, you see, I found this cool thing on Tumblr with prompts for different days of an entire week and I’m putting my fingies to work. – the narrator explained, his attention never departing from the monitor of his laptop. - If I don’t make it to the late submission deadline, it’s your fault!

- And? I’ve read through most of it already.

- You’re also ruining my Funky Flow – the narrator pouted, really sticking out his bottom lip as he tilted his head back to meet Virgil’s eyes. – Only kisses can revive it now.

- Of course they can.

Utterly hypnotized by the narrator’s uniquely irresistible charm, the tall emo drew in behind him, his long, gentle fingers threading through Remus’s dark hair. A dangerous smirk cut through his cheeks, his slightly parted lips hinting at the presence of his white, shiny fangs, and the duke went willingly once Virgil tugged him back, the top of his head sinking into his soft belly.

- I’ll kiss you if you don’t make me lose to Janus. – the narrator’s adoring boyfriend proposed, combing through his hair until his coherent thoughts fizzled into indistinguishable static.

- That’s Doctor Noodle for your information – the duke purred in a quiet little voice, trembling as Virgil’s hands dipped down towards his face, his thumbs smoothing out over his cheeks before they slowly took exploring his exposed neck.

- Medical Doctor or another kind of PhD?

- You’ll have to ask Roman that. He’d the one that named the thing.

Leaning down until the light above their heads was completely blocked by Virgil’s shoulders, Remus dared to close his eyes in anticipation, expecting for at least a few spidery kisses before somebody tried to interrupt them.

- I’m not saving you if your brother walks through that door looking for his plushies – his boyfriend threatened, his wandering hands making it very hard to think why they were still talking about Pissy.

- I think I was promised kisses.

- Maybe – his breath tickled across Remus’s lips, his body moving against the top of his head. – And maybe I was promised an accurate representation of how I act, and yet, here we are.

Whining loudly so that the whole world could hear about his misery, Intrusive Thoughts tried to wrap his arms around Virgil’s neck, trapping him in this awkward position so that he’d have no other choice but to pay for his freedom in kisses, but unfortunately, his sneaky spider escaped right at the last minute, stepping away and leaving him alone with his raging heart boner.

- I’ll do it! – the duke whined, quickly turning around to try to get his hands on Virgil one last time. – I just need a few wittle kisses to motivate me!

Scrunching up his face, his cruel boyfriend dodged his loving grabs with little to no effort.

- You’re getting even less kisses if you start speaking in uwu voice.

- Aww, but you love it when I act like that! – Remus protested, nearly abandoning his laptop so he could jump his boyfriend’s bones.

- Do I? – Virgil raised in eyebrow at him, treating him like a misbehaving dog.

If he knew the story from the beginning, he’d know that Duke was a raccoon and/or a skunk!!

Needless to say, the narrator couldn’t keep on narrating when he had such a mean spider to catch.

[angsty-prompt-hole]

WIP Question Tag Game

Tagged by @ceph-the-ghost-writer

Rules: Answer as many (or as few) of the questions about your WIP as you can.

Tagging: I'm leaving this as an open tag

I'll be answering all of them for A Hero's Call.

1. What was the first part of your WIP that you created?

The very first part of A Hero's Call that I created was the concept of dimension jumping in general. It was inspired by both the ghost portals from Danny Phantom and my middle school self's mighty need for crossover content from my favorite shows, and then I kind of just made a self insert to make those crossovers happen, and that self insert evolved into Kira.

2. If your story was a TV show, what would the intro song be?

So, when I was young and naive and didn't know how filmmaking worked, I wanted A Hero's Call to be a tv show. The intro song was always gonna be some sort of early 2000's rock/emo/metal song, and I almost always came back to In The End by Black Veil Brides. And honestly, I still stand by that.

3. Who are your favourite character(s) and why?

So, I love Kira, I really do, she's the main character after all. HOWEVER, my blorbos for the series are definitely Lucent and Cairn, which is really funny if you have the knowledge I do (that knowledge being that Lucent has ice powers and Cairn has fire powers). Lucent was a character I originally made to rp with some friends without having to use my already established characters, because I was weird and had stupid hangups about sharing my work, and she's kind of become my punching bag OC of the series which is how I know she's one of my favorites. I love making her go through physical and emotional torment.

Cairn is just fun for me to think about conceptually, because he's a villain that really could have chosen redemption, and he almost does at quite a few different points in his life, but ultimately he succumbs to the cycle of abuse and gives in to that darker side of himself. Also the thought of this very inhuman-looking dude having a Tumblr is SO funny to me (he is canonically VERY internet-savvy).

4. What other pieces of media could share a fan base with your WIP?

Any number of media pieces tbh, but the biggest one would probably be Buffy the Vampire Slayer, which was a HUGE inspiration for this project.

5. What has been your biggest struggle while writing your WIP?

Writing the beginning of it. I've struggled so hard with it and I can never figure out what's holding me back, which annoys me. And the more I write the more I discover that when I have all the pieces to a story that I want to tell, the writing starts flowing eventually. But with this WIP I've just had to drag those first few chapters out kicking and screaming from my brain and I can tell something is missing, but I don't know what.

6. Are there any animals in your story?

Yes, there are. There's the Shade family dog, a golden retriever named Gary (who is, in fact, just my real dog inserted into the story), and there's also Lucent's "pet" Jannik, who is a ferret-like creature called a skitnik. Emily and Pickle are ranch kids so they have a ton of animals that sometimes get mentioned, but Gary and Jannik are more central to the plot than those animals are.

7. How do your characters get around?

All the normal ways you would get around in rural Wyoming in the 2010's (cars, horses, off-road vehicles, etc). And, of course, dimension jumping.

8. What part of your WIP are you working on right now?

I'm rewriting the first few chapters (again) to try and get them ready to post on AO3 because I've been churning out fanfiction nonstop because of how much the kudos and comments go to my head, so I want to see if putting my original works on AO3 would spur me on to work on them more.

9. What aspects of your WIP do you think will draw people in?

I think that the characters and the worldbuilding will be the major draws for people, cause I have a LOT of lore and a lot of fun characters to introduce and I think it'll be fun for people to explore.

[beevean]

"Sure, Eggman saving Tails from Orbot in Colors was uncharacterisically nice… but you’re not going to use an example from a game written by Pontaff[...] You would be consistent, right?" Hi there! I did just that; I wrote a post called "Eggman has always had redeeming qualities" that does cite that! (He actually saved Tails from Cubot in Lost World, but I get what you mean.) I like both Pontaff and Flynn! Pontaff brought final-boss Eggman back to 3D Sonic, which I liked along with Flynn's Eggdad.

Oh, hello! I have read your post :)

(ignore the typo lmao, yes I meant Lost World)

It's well written, but I disagree on a few fronts.

Eggman saved Sonic from the lava in Underground Zone, but I doubt that it comes from the goodness of his heart. At best, you can see it as Eggman wanting Sonic to die by his own hands - why would he place him in the pit where the Mecha Antlion rests? He wants his creation to kill his archnemesis. At worst, he knows that Sonic by that point should have a Chaos Emerald, so he won't take any chance.

Eggman doesn't want the world destroyed, that much is true. This is why Gerald's actions horrify him, and why the pedestal on which he put his grandfather broke in SA2. But it's because he wants to conquer the world for himself: he says as much in the cutscene before Sky Troops in ShTH. I also really wouldn't want to use Eggman's portrayal in that game to prove Eggman's best qualities: there is a whole path where Eggman takes delight in gaslighting Shadow for his own amusement, one of the few instances where he personally harms someone.

Speaking of which, while in English he implies that he cares about humanity's value, he's vaguer in Japanese: "He sold the planet's future for his own research results!?". Again, fits better with the idea that he wants the planet for himself.

And while on the subject, @colony-drop-program broke down the part where Eggman confesses the truth to Shadow during the Devil Doom battle much better than I ever could.

Eggman feeding Mr. Pickle is the bare minimum. Of course he'd need him alive, well and cooperative. Also, you mention Tails being kidnapped in S2 8-bit, but what about the fact that the bad ending is often interpreted as Eggman killing Tails? Technically it's not canon, but then again, the canonicity of the 8-bit games in general is up to debate.

Finally, my whole gripe with Eggdad is not that Eggman is a whole ass heartless monster straight from hell, or that being a dad is incompatible with being a villain. I also saw your post about how Eggdad makes Eggman more contemptible because he can understand love, he just doesn't care, which yea, in a vacuum, I agree with you. But I think Eggman developing nurturing qualities for an AI is OOC, for him, because no single positive trait of his would lead to him thinking of an AI as a daughter in an affectionate way, and there is proof upon proof of the opposite, Eggman mistreating his own creations and treating them as disposable, no matter how humanoid. Eggman being proud of the complexity of his creation? Absolutely, that is in character. Eggman going on an ego trip over how he created something very similar to life with his own hands, as one of the Egg Memoes says? Yep, also makes sense. Eggman getting emotional over the death of Sage? Unlikely, and also cheap since he was immediately able to recreate her from scratch, memories and all. It doesn't help that in the game itself, the two don't really... bond? Eggman spends most of his time bitching to Sage that he wants to get out. Besides, the fandom has already reduced Eggman to a softie, just like in the good Sonic X days, and not really considering the complexity of a fatherly villain - it doesn't help that Eggman does literally nothing in the game, let alone something evil, except for laughing at Sonic's comatose state. I have... a lot of problems with Eggman in Frontiers, and Eggdad was the last straw. Fun fact: Eggman's "feminist" trait is not present in the Japanese manual of Sonic Heroes, but it proves your point in a different way. Here's the page coming from this archived version:

As the name suggests, he's an evil genius scientist with a body like an egg. He boasts an IQ of 300 and he's an authority on robotics.

Although he is an evil genius scientist, he loves world domination, probably because of his childish personality. Despite failing many times in the past, he comes up with a larger-scale world domination operation every time!

Sonic, who always gets in his way, is truly his eternal nemesis. However, deep down in his heart, there seems to be a part of him that holds him in high regard, and he has a diligent side, to the point that he goes out of his way to send a letter of challenge.

I don't understand why the bio makes Eggman sounds like he has feelings for Sonic, but I swear that that's what "憎からず思っている" means, you can look it up :V and this exact description was recycled for Origins lmao. So, if you want to prove that Eggman is not completely rotten, there you go, he holds Sonic dear in his heart apparently!

And I agree that there is really no pragmatic reason why Eggman saved Tails in Lost World, and I do like his "I'm a complicated guy" line :)

I understand your stance, and you explained it well, especially in the more recent post. If I have to accept Eggdad, I'll definitely accept him as an hypocritical figure who only cares about his creation but won't extend the same empathy to the children he's trying to kill :P in any case, I appreciate that you came to me in a civil tone despite our divergences, it's not to take for granted ^^ obviously if you like both Pontaff and Flynn my snarky remark does not apply to you, I was talking about the ones who are very biased.

[nalyra-dreaming]

I look forward to seeing Cyril and Thorne so much. I love their dynamic and commitment to the job. I remember someone said they want to see the two dorks as a couple and I can get behind that! Also I personally see Cyril and Santh being a thing too (or the three of them 💕). I also hope to see Louis having his dear friends/defense squad. “he asked for no pickles” and you look up and it’s a redhead viking bear, a buff blond jock, and an Egyptian powerhouse.

I thank fanon for adding to the existing personalities of the three. Cyril being a goofball but taking his assignment seriously. Santh being a himbo. Thorne being a gentle giant who towers over everyone and isn’t the most brilliant dude ever but still a force to be reckoned with if you hurt his friends…

I love them, obviously. Heh. Not gonna lie, I’m probably going to get a little self-indulgent here, but these guys are precious to me.

In the case of Santh, @fofoqueirah wrote a fic where there’s a background event of Louis and Santh going to the Burning Man Festival together and I just 🥺 Louis needs that.

Thorne, I hope for him to be portrayed as strange but amicable, just as he is in the books. His as-matter-of-fact attitude makes me laugh. Marius’ tendency to greet with bloody kisses? Sure? Maharet has had enough and decides to chain up Thorne? Cool. I honestly imagine Lestat fussing over Thorne every time Thorne gets hurt trying to protect him or stop Lestat from accidentally starting another turf war lol 💕💕

Cyril. Cyril! Louis’ bodyguard and “friend” (historians will say as such, ahem 👀). I hope they get to read together and get into trouble together. I hope the show builds on their bond. It will hurt soooo bad when Louis gets taken by Rhosh. It’s never mentioned in Blood Communion, and I am certain Cyril was DEVASTATED. Because he’s supposed to be protecting the royal couple and one of them just got nabbed.

And I didn’t forget about Mitka! He’s so cute and awkward. He can read with Louis and Cyril. I hope there’s a sexy little blood-sharing scene where Lestat watches them make out or whatever. 😏

What I don’t understand is how Anne Rice added like, 60 new OCs in the last three books only to do very little with most of them. Accidental minor villain potential of Gregory comes to mind, as well as expanding on the vampire counsel and the inevitable infighting

Haha yes. :))

*sighs*

I mean Anne noted at some point that she was planning on three more books, but... she couldn't finish them.

So I also always felt like there were hooks in the last books, hooks that she might have taken up in those planned books. (I do feel as if the show has taken some of those hooks up, like Fareed wanting to get the "day" back for them, and the sex itself, and so on?! You know?) But I agree, it's a lot of new characters in the last trilogy, and not all of them are as fleshed out as they deserve to be.

I also hope that we will get to see this particular trio, and what the Rhosh-situation does to them... I'm not a 100% sure we will (on the show), because it really is a lot of new vampires, but... I mean, Fareed is there^^. Gimme, Rolin^^.

And oh gosh, I have to read that!! Because yes, Louis needs these kind of things *g*

Ahhhh, I cannot wait.

There is SO MUCH yet to come.

And AMC actually seems to be in for the long run.

Fingers crossed^^

[qiu-yan]

on a watsonian level: the way he's caught between love and duty. the way he, unlike wei wuxian, cannot afford to be idealistic and heroic and instead must be pragmatic, because the fate of his sect rides on his shoulders. the way he looks before he leaps. the way he singlehandedly brought his sect back from the brink of annihilation. the way in which he has always felt, whether justifiably or not, that he just isn't enough to be anyone's first choice, that no one would ever choose him first; the way in which, despite his fears of being abandoned, he doesn't want to force someone to stay with him if they don't want to stay with him. the way in which he's been pickling for 13 years over the question of why wei wuxian did what he did: did wei wuxian genuinely mean it when he promised they'd be the twin heroes of yunmeng; did wei wuxian ever actually really care about them, about him? the way in which, by drawing away the wen patrol to save wei wuxian, he betrayed every single one of his filial duties. the way in which he clearly loves jin ling, despite his flawed parenting; the way in which he does better by jin ling than yu ziyuan did by him.

also the way in which he's the funniest bitch in the story lmao

on a doylist level: i find it interesting how the narrative of MDZS deliberately misleads the reader about jiang cheng's character, right up until the reveal of how he actually lost his golden core. MDZS deliberately invokes and subverts several popular wuxia genre tropes, including but not limited to the Always Chaotic Evil demonic-cultivator final boss (wei wuxian, who in reality was only trying to protect the innocent and repay his debts) and the scheming villain who pulls out an evil scheme when he's cornered (jin guangyao, who in reality was only trying to retrieve his dead mother's remains before fleeing the country). jiang cheng himself is clearly meant to read as the common character trope of the "inferior brother jealous + resentful of his more successful brother." it's easy to read MDZS and conclude that jiang cheng is just another iteration of said trope: that he failed to stand with wei wuxian purely because of his inferiority complex, that he now genuinely hates wei wuxian because of wei wuxian's role in jiang yanli's death.

yet, once you get to the guanyin temple scene, you realize that there's more depth to jiang cheng's character than this mere trope suggests. while jiang cheng does have a massive chip on his shoulder about feeling inferior to wei wuxian, his thoughts and feelings towards wei wuxian are far more complicated than a mere inferiority complex. while jiang cheng does blame wei wuxian for jiang yanli's death, his deeply-held grievances against wei wuxian do not fall solely along those lines.

when jiang cheng started yelling at wei wuxian at the yunping guanyin temple, i fully expected him to scream at wei wuxian for causing the circumstances that led to jiang yanli's death and for playing a major role in orphaning jin ling. but jiang cheng did not do that. and it was only when jiang cheng defied my expectations and instead began to cry about broken promises, about how wei wuxian had promised him that the two of them would be the twin prides of yunmeng and that wei wuxian broke this promise by leaving him, that i realized i was wrong about this character. when i realized: ah, i never noticed. jiang cheng must too have once genuinely loved wei wuxian.

that was the exact moment i became a jiang cheng fan.

given that the reveal of how jiang cheng actually lost his golden core came right after this scene, i do think that how i reacted to jiang cheng is how MXTX intended for the readers to react to jiang cheng. once i reread the book, i realized that the narration went out of its way several times to obfuscate the fact that jiang cheng loved wei wuxian, even though in hindsight such a fact is obvious. when jiang cheng does something cruel or hateful, the narration can always spare a few extra lines describing how hateful jiang cheng is being - whether said line is about the rumors surrounding jiang cheng's torture hobby, wei wuxian's snarky internal commentary on how unreasonable jiang cheng is being, or a simple description of how dramatically jiang cheng sneers. yet, when jiang cheng does something kind - when he carries wei wuxian after wei wuxian gets beaten by the lan, when he runs for seven day straight to save wei wuxian and lan wangji from the cave of the xuanwu of slaughter, when he and jiang yanli secretly visit wei wuxian in yiling, when he runs back into the demon-subduing cave after a wei wuxian using himself as bait despite jiang cheng's spiritual powers still being sealed - the narration does not comment on said deed at all. it merely describes said deed before moving on immediately. almost as if we are meant to take for granted that jiang cheng once cared for wei wuxian. almost as if we aren't meant to notice at all, until the scene in the yunping guanyin temple.

Followers/mutuals pls tell me ur favorite thing about JC…

[monstermaster13]

Aykroydian Invasion. Tom Everett (Caddyshack II) FTM TG/Were-Aykroyd theme.

~~~~~~ Sometimes being a paranormal law enforcer isn't easy, and that's something Melanie 'Mel' Sanders had to put up with all the time, from villains who were too stubborn to change their ways to people who thought of her as a 'threat' or 'pest' rather than an ally, it wasn't easy at all for her to cope and it was very stressful, sometimes she felt like she just wanted to break out into her she-hulkesque form and get back at those types of people but she was above this, she was above using violence or hostility…she only did that on truly horrible people. But one night when she was on duty with Matthias T. Radke aka That Werebelushi In The Shades (who had signed on a security chief) she had gotten herself into quite a pickle, she didn't mean to though…it's just that she got involved with a type of monster that got the better of her, that was a type of were-celeb. The two of them were on duty when she heard a cry for help, and like the superheroine she was she rushed right over to assist the person that was in trouble. But just as she did…she and Matthias found themselves a horde of Dan Aykroyd characters.

"Matthias..am I having another one of my weird dreams again?"

"Nope…if you were, you'd be possessed by Mick Jagger and seducing your boyfriend with a long tongue."

Elwood Blues, Mack Sennett, Ben Bart, Beldar and Austin Milbarge materialized around her. 'Hi Miss Mel.' 'How do you know my name and what are you doing with that person over there?' 'Nothing, we just want to say hi to you and introduce ourselves. We are the Aykroyds, and we all have a special gift that someone like you would appreciate.' Austin's eyes gave off a supernatural glow, making Mel bush a little. Was he trying to hypnotize her? Because it suddenly became difficult for her to focus on anyone but him…as if she was falling under his spell, Austin explained that he had been searching for someone who would appreciate him for being strange and that if there was anyone it would be her.

"I don't know why but…i'm…"

"Yes, Ms Mel?"

"Attracted to you…"

Maybe it was the adorable doe eyes and that sweet boyish charm but she couldn't help but fall in love with Austin, yes..he was an Aykroyd character and a spy and usually only Eukie fell in love with Aykroyd characters but she couldn't help but find him irresistible. 'You're attracted to me? Well that sounds wonderful, i've always wanted to be with someone who truly understood me. It's not easy being what I am, i'm sure you know how it feels too.' 'Why yes, I do.' 'I want to be your friend, but more than that. I want you to join me.' Those words snapped Mel out of her trance. 'WHAT?' 'You heard me, I want you to join me and the guys and become one of us.' 'Oh that's just great, another assimilator type.' 'Hey hey hey…i'm not like that I swear.' She huffed for a few minutes before getting out her spellbook and getting ready to cast a few spells. I know I know, you're probably thinking this is one of those 'jerkass character gets punished by being turned stories' you've heard over and over again scenarios or those scenarios where a character bemoans their transforming state, well you're going to be disappointed.

Anyway…Austin seemed worried and confused, he didn't mean to say what he said, he wasn't evil…in fact he was a good guy, it was just that even with all the others he felt like he needed someone to be his friend and to support him. Mel felt like she had hurt his feelings and she only cast one spell, that spell was to keep herself from being affected by the others. 'Austin, i'm sorry.' 'It's alright…it's just sometimes being an Aykroyd is kind of lonely.' 'Even with all the others?' 'Yes. I just wish I had a friend who understood me.' 'I know how you feel.'

'You do?"

"Yes…I feel that there are some people out there that don't get me. They either view me as someone who transforms people forcibly and punishes them even if they didn't do anything wrong or as a threat or a pest. I'm just doing my job. And what would they rather have me do? Work at Hooters?"'

"You're viewed as crazy too?"

"Yes…and I loathe it. I have thoughts, I have feelings..but does anyone ever ask me? Does anyone ever ask me how I feel nope? They assume i'm an uncaring monster who would rather threaten the lives of an innocent person."

"You poor thing…" sh "It's a difficult life."

"Maybe I could help, I wouldn't force you to transform into an Aykroyd. I could give you the ability to do it and teach you how to control it. Would you like that? It may feel strange to you at first but you'd grow to like it."

"Now that's what i'm looking for in a monster."

Austin chuckled several times, hugging Mel gently and kissing her…Mel allowed him to do so and in the process he transferred his aura into her, giving him his powers which mixed with her own aura and gave her half Aykroydian attributes. 'Woah, you're a good kisser.' She began to feel a little bit dizzy for a few seconds but she didn't faint. 'Thanks…are you alright?'

"Yeah…maybe I just need to wind down."

"I know just the place, follow me."

Austin and the other Aykroyd characters helped Mel, taking her to a hotel that was located next to the Hellfire Nightclub. 'I have been here before. It's where I rest when i'm away from my friends. Could you boys book a room for me?' 'Sure.' The guys headed over the reception area and booked a room for her, she had to admit that they were really generous. 'Say where are you guys from?' 'The Aykroyd-verse.' 'Not the Upside Down?' 'We like that place, but we're not from there.' Mel walked into the room that had been booked for her, turned on some classical music and laid down.

As she laid down, she drifted off to sleep and dreamed. Although her dreams took on an unusual turn, they started with her walking down a hallway while music was playing, and that Dan Aykroyd himself was speaking to her, telling her of his ways. He asked if she'd like to know more, she nodded and said yes. She willingly allowed Dan to turn into a ghost and possess her, but she didn't mind it. When she awoke, she began to feel a bit odd..her stomach gurgled, she assumed it was because she ate something terrible. Although the only thing she had eaten prior to this was piece of the chocolate koala cake that her boyfriend had made her for her birthday.

Her stomach slowly inflated while her arms broadened, she gasped while her hands enlarged…her fur slowly transitioning into skin, for a while she looked horrified but then she realized she willingly let this happen as she examined her chest, her torso broadened while her breasts retracted. Her dark blue tank top slowly turning into a camouflage one as tattoos burned themselves into existence on her arms, a pair of black fingerless gloves materializing on her hands while she examined her body. 'You know I thought this would be scary but I don't mind it, I really like it.' 'See? I told you it would be good.' 'Am I becoming like you guys?' 'Yes. You are.'

Mel blushed a little as the same pattern from her shirt developed on her jeans and her rear shrank in size before plumping up, her back broadening as her privates contorted. She felt only a mild bit of pain as she slowly grew up in height to 6'1 and her shoulders broadened, her tail retracting into her rear as her hair slowly shortened itself, her eyes widened as one remained brown and the other turned green, her eyebrows thickened as her nose broadened a little. 'Ah-ah-ah-achoo!', she couldn't help but let out a sneeze as her much larger nose finished growing, twitching in the process, she sneezed into her elbow to prevent any possible problems. A small cleft materialized in the middle of it as her lips lost their feminine touch but remained kissable, her features slowly morphing and contorting themselves while her koala-like ears shrank away, her jawline broadening while two black lines that looked like war paint materialized.

Her features slowly morphed and contorted themselves further, taking on a more Aykroydian appearance. She was a little distraught that she was turning into a character of Aykroyd's she hated but she wasn't horrified, it's just that she wasn't quite used to it yet. She chuckled a little as her voice deepened and lowered, also contorting into a voice that sounded like an imitation of Bill Murray as Carl Speckler as done by Aykroyd, that voice belonging to the character she was turning into. She held her head for a few seconds as her or rather 'his' mind and personality contorted, memories merging together as he remembered being an Aykroyd, but also being named Tom Everett as his transformation completed.

"How does it feel?"

"Not too bad. I like this."

"Good, welcome aboard. I told you it would be fun."

Matthias/Werebelushi barged in just as he witnessed this, he gasped as he saw what happened to his partner. 'Mel..is that you?' 'Oh, you're looking for Ms Mel?' 'Is that you in there?' 'Don't be silly…everyone knows my name is Capt. Tom Everett.' 'The Aykroyds got to you, didn't they?' 'They sure did, boy are they the nicest guys ever.' 'Nice? But they made you into his character from Caddyshack II and you hate that character.' 'Not really…now I think about it, I think he's alright.'

"It's alright, he can still be Mel. Watch."

Austin used a special spell on Tom Everett that enabled him to turn back into 'Mel' before morphing back into Tom. 'He can still live a normal life you see.' 'That's good to know.' 'So what do you say? Can he stay here with us tonight?' 'I don't see why not.' 'Mr Werebelushi, you're a lifesaver.' And thus with that the Aykroyds and their newest member stayed for the night while Matthias kept watch all night long.

As for what happened later, Tom Everett did manage to live a normal life and still have time to hang out with his other friends while embracing the perks of his new self. Being an Aykroyd really wasn't so strange after all. And here comes the moral, remember…sometimes we might think that the monsters we meet everyday are a threat, but really they're just like us and if you take the time to get to know them, you might learn more about them.

[writingfool001]

Can u make f!Yuu that goes to the all princess school but a prince fell in love with her not knowing she was destined to marry a one of the dorm leaders but she is happy because she gets a happy ending so she rejects him infront of every guy and girl as there in shock and she explains why and the dorm leaders react to her saying that she is Destined to marry a villian

I Already Found my Happily Ever After

Author's Note: I am starting out with three and complete the other four later. Please remember the 3-character limit per request. If I ever write about female reader, they will be strong.

Pairing: Riddle, Leona, and Azul x Female Reader

Part 2 (Jamil, Vil, Idia, & Malleus) Part 3 (Kalim, Rook, & Lilia)

It was a joint school get together or basically what prom would be with several academies together which was an upside for you and your lover. You barely have had the time to see each other since both of you go to different schools and your school would rather affiliate themselves with the Royal Sword Academy than Raven Night College. 

When the event was announced, the headmistress advised everyone to be on their best behavior and if anyone from another school tried to force themselves, you had full permission to take care of the problem or find an instructor. Yeah, your headmistress had zero tolerance for assholes. She also mentioned that it was NRC's turn this year to  

You met up with each other at the event and your lover was dressed handsomely as he stood out in the crowd. You both decided to have a nice night, wanting to enjoy the time with each other. He complimented you on your attire and gave you a kiss on the cheek before escorting you to the main hall where the event was being held. 

At some point, you stepped away to use the restroom and right as you were on the way to return, a figure stepped into the middle of your path which made you stop. 

“My humble apologies, but I couldn’t help ignoring your gorgeous self and was wondering if I could possibly have this dance as your date.” He started bowing and held his hand out. 

“Sorry, but I’m here with someone,” You decline politely, stepping around him to continue on your way and only get a couple feet away before he spoke again.  

“What could be better than dancing with a prince and possibly your future true love?” He said, causing you to freeze as others paused and watched the interaction.  

“What could be better than that, you ask?” You turn your head to look at him over your shoulder, “Dancing with my betrothed.”  

“Who could he possibly be? Possibly from RSA?”  

“Nope, he goes to NRC.”  

“A villain?! Are you mad?”  

“Nope, I’ve always loved the villain more than the hero. Perhaps all the other girls, fawning after you, will take up your proposal.”  

You walk off, leaving many people’s jaws on the floor as you made your way over to your beloved who saw you publicly humiliate some prince. 

Riddle 

He was flustered after hearing the entire thing and stuttered a bit because he just saw you publicly reject a student from RSA and chose to stay with him. 

He feels proud and happy that you would rather stay with him than run off with some prince. Gracefully, he bows and takes your hand before kissing your knuckle before escorting you to the dance floor. Internally, he was celebrating and was applauding you for standing up for yourself.  

He was a bit panicked when you talked back to his mother once and stood your ground. It took him a while to get used to it and after a while, you would occasionally do the whole "he asked for no pickles' ' a couple of times. He introduces you to Trey and Che'nya, who coincidentally keeps you company whenever your school and RSA get together for some sort of event. 

Che'nya has kept Riddle informed of all the boys at RSA who have tried to "wow" you and every time, you rejected them, and you tell your classmates that you already found your happy ever after.  

He was worried your opinion would change when he overblotted and the level of worrying got worse when he woke you sleeping in a chair, next to his bed. When you woke up, he was ready for you to break off your engagement and had a whole speech before you kissed him and told him he was stuck with you.  

His heart melted at the compliment and was flushed before telling you that he was going to confront his mother about everything she did while he grew up. Trey and Cater showed up with a small group of new boys and a cat. 

You thanked them for saving him and looking after him before bluenette asked who you were and told them you are Riddle’s fiancé. The three new faces’ eyes widened, and jaws dropped as the calmer one of the four just nodded. After that, you make sure to have a small study call with Riddle and check on him to make sure he’s okay. When winter break came around, you were waiting for him in your hometown and told him that you had your family on speed dial in case his mother became violent. He just smiled brightly and took his hand in yours before walking back to his house, readying to face the beast. 

If there was to be one thing that came out well with his mother’s involvement, it was the betrothal between you two. He hopes you will stay by his side in the future.  

Leona 

Smugish face, he has made ever since you two met, and lets out a hearty chuckle as he approaches before holding his arm out for you to take before you both strutted away from the unknown prince. 

One of the many things he cherished about you was your bite and he remembers the first time you returned his snide remark with your own. The appalled look of his parents when they watched you two interact after meeting each other for the first time while your father chuckled as your mother would light lecture you later. Overtime, it was fun to have you around, especially during the gatherings you both had to attend. 

Even during some of those, some noble's son tried to propose and sweep you off your feet before failing. This even happened to Leona, he either let them make their case or refuse. 

After a while you two would bet who would approach either of you to try to come between you two. 

"They seem to get bolder, but never learn." You spoke under your breath, causing Leona to chuckle. 

"I'll wager you're right, my queen." He kissed the crown of your head before continuing to lead you to the botanical garden for a nightly walk. 

Azul 

Internally, he has stopped working and wants to disappear to his octopi while he hides his small blush by pushing up his glasses. He wishes he had your boldness sometimes, but he remembers he'd rather leave bold moves to you. 

You both met originally when he was somewhat getting bullied while the twins weren't around. They were threatening him before you showed up and showed them you weren't going to put up with their shit. Afterwards, he thought you would want something in return and all you said was his friendship which stunned him. He decided to see how long you would stick around, thinking it would be short time. 

Welp, he was wrong because you became part of the small trio and stuck next to Azul more than the twins. You knew a majority of things about him, yet he knew nothing about you and when asked, you would tell him you had a family and lived down the way from his home. His mother decided to have a business meeting with a local restaurant owner to see if they would be interested in working with her. Azul questioned why she wanted him to come along and was told that they had a daughter around his age.  

To his shock when he saw you, sitting next to the owner of the restaurant and having a light conversation before noticing the shocked octopus. You revealed everything to him, and a majority of the evening was you two talked the night away without noticing the two parents who saw the small spark between you two as you lightly teased Azul. 

It would be a couple of months later before a suggestion of being engaged to one another came up which didn't surprise you since Azul mumbled something about marrying you while you two were studying. Nothing really changed between the two of you other than occasional dinner dates and close family teasing you two. Of course, there were moments where you two would argue and walk away from each other for space before either one of you or both of you would come together to talk it out.  

The same routine would happen when you two were studying at different academies. You both would text and send each other small trinkets or gifts that reminded you of each other. Every now and then, you two would meet up somehow to spend time with each other. 

Azul held his hand out to you before kissing you gently on the cheek, causing you to smile. He led you to the dance floor before dancing the night away with you. 

[thebrightsessions]

Entertainment Spotlight: Ian McQuown

Ian is an LA based actor and producer known for the YouTube comedy group, Extremely Decent, as well as a voice actor in the popular audio dramas: The Bright Sessions, The AM Archives, StarTripper!! & Deck The Halls! His credits inclue American Housewife, Trial & Error, Better Things, and For All Mankind. Ian took the time to answer some questions for us. Check it out:

You’ve worked on multiple podcasts -- what drew you to the medium?

Well, to be honest, Lauren drew me to it because TBS was my first narrative podcast. We met at a Rocky Horror Picture Show show. Anna Lore is our mutual friend and I think Anna is just talented as all get out, so anything she’s involved I want to be in. And, I don’t know, it was just one of those lucky breaks you get where a door opens and takes you to all these cool places you never anticipated.

On podcasting though, I really appreciate how much more possible it is to tell engaging stories without the boundaries of having to afford a set and a camera and insurance and etc etc etc. Like, I grew up with Star Wars, The Matrix, Cowboy Bebop— so when I imagine the stories I like, I’m usually picturing other worlds, space ships, people with super powers and those types of stories used to have a lot higher barrier to entry to make than they do now, which is just awesome.

If you could give a character from The Bright Sessions a spinoff series, who would you choose and what would the series be called?

I mean, no surprises here, but I’d love to see Damien’s early years. And I’d be super clever and call it something like... Damien: The Early Years. I'm dying for that content a little bit actually: Damien, before he became such a bad guy. Maybe a love story that doesn’t work out and leaves him really scarred? Villains so bad they created a villain instead of a victim—  that moment where we see the two roads Damien has to choose between and it totally shreds us when he makes the choice we all know he’s going to make, I mean, come ON you can see that, right? It’d be like the Star Wars prequels but without all the youngling killing and “NOOOOOOOO”’s and I want it.

Can you share a fun story or anecdote from the making of The Bright Sessions?

Haha, ok well it’s not really anything of note BUT: I remember Lauren had this area rug in her room, which as you probably know is where we would record, and it was this really nice, I think, red sort of floral rug that took up pretty much all the floor space because it was covering up the older apartment rug-floor underneath it. And it was, as I said, really cool, except it wasn’t a rug on a wood floor, right? It was a rug on a rug so it was a bit taller than the people who designed the room had planned for— the result of which was that you’d walk in and the room had this really awesome little vibe with this cute rug, and it was all very cozy, unless you looked directly behind you at the corner where the door had just spent ages scraping the surface of it, catching the corner, tearing little pieces out. And I may be getting apocryphal at this point, but I feel like by the time I had started coming around Lauren had straight up duct taped it to the floor, which really didn’t help the problem. And, I don’t know—again it’s not really anything momentous—but I just remember giving Lauren a particular amount of shit about it one day and us all having a really good laugh. And I really love that— there are jobs where you show up, keep your head down, do your work and leave, but then there are jobs like The Bright Sessions where you all get to become friends, and even if you don’t see each other for a while you sort of just get to pick up where you left off. And then those jobs turn into other jobs and you get to keep hanging out with your friends and peers and just making stuff you like— I’m a big fan of that.

If your life was a choose your own adventure, what decisions would viewers have to make on an average day?

OKAY, you wake up...

Water your garden before it gets to be 110 today, you cannot skip this step. You may however:

A) Stay out in the garden for longer if you get inspired and check if the tomatoes and peppers are ripe for picking.

Great! Now let’s make breakfast:

A) Make eggs, toast, fried tomatoes, and hash browns? 

B) Make (A) But also with Bacon? 

C) Make a smoothie?

D) There’s no time today, run to Whole Foods and get their incredibly priced $6 Egg, Bacon Cheese Breakfast burrito.

Awesome! You’ve eaten and now you can think. What work do you have to do?

A) Prep your audition, dummy! It’s due this afternoon, go fix your hair. 

B) You have a zoom meeting with actor friends at 11 to play around with some new material, put on a hat.

C) There is nothing you have to work on so stare at your computer and wonder if there’s new project you could be working on. Try to find that project, leave your hair as it.

Wow! You really had a great (insert previous choice here), let’s get you a coffee and take a TV break. What should we watch?!

A) That new show you haven’t seen yet because you need to watch everything so you know how to work on it should you get an audition for it.

B) Harley Quinn (your favorite new cartoon).

C) Teenage Bounty Hunters.

D) Farscape.

E) Nope, you just got an audition for tomorrow, everything is off the table, start working on it (Level Complete).

Lunch Time!!!

A) Turkey sandwich with pickles from the garden?

B) Trader Joe’s Margherita Pizza with basil and peppers from the garden?

C) Are we going to start another loaf of sourdough you basic mf?

D) Yes we probably are, but also (A) and (B).

Cool! I’ve eaten lunch. Now what?

A) You haven’t finished that work from this morning. Riiiight.

B)…More Harley Quinn…?

C) Let’s make pasta from scratch!

D) Let’s make ribs! From…ribs!

F) You just got an audition for tomorrow, everything is off the table, start working on it. (Level Complete).

Bangarang! You probably chose to start cooking dinner immediately after eating lunch. You ate it (and it rocked), what now?

A) You just got an audition for tomorrow, everything is off the table, start working on it. (Level Complete)

B) DnD with squad.

C) Go on a run, dude— you’re getting a Jaba chin….

D) Bring on the chin! Let’s watch TV until 2am! Here are your options:

A) Harley Quinn (your new favorite cartoon)

B) Teenage Bounty Hunters

C) Farscape

D) Put The Office on in the background and clean your house.

Level Complete.

As you can see I’m a very food-focused person. Also, I’m going to be real, that is truly what most of my days look like and I’m low-key a little mortified that ’taking a shower’ wasn’t a game option... 

Can you share your favorite piece of Bright Sessions / AM Archives fan art?

I love all the fan art that people make for my characters but this one from Franartz has always been really special to me. It’s so GQ, I just love it — and some of my favorite early AG moments are with Damien, who looks a little like he stepped out of a Gorrilaz album here— big fan. I’m a little obsessed with fan art actually, I save everything I come across— there’s a freckled red-headed series of Owen by TheFigureInTheCorner that makes me really happy. Seeing that my work has inspired someone else to make something of their own is really what’s up, you know? It makes me think about all the art and entertainment that has touched me over the years and I get a lot of joy from being a part of that cycle.

Thanks for taking the time, Ian! Give I Can Die When I'm Done a relisten right here.

[tailsbot98761]

Carla: Favorite person? oh it's not much of a contest, It's my dear Felix of course! hes so kind and handsome and brave, hes just perfect!

Felix: Without a doubt Carla, no contest, shes so pretty, and shes always full of energy, and shes a great cook, and ahhh I Just love her so much

Thyme: My favorite person is Starbie, shes real cute. andI can tell you my least favorite-

Bird: THE FEELINGS MUTUAL CLOCK FACE

Chaos: *but nobody came*

Comax: I cant shake the feeling that theres someone I want to say but I cant quite remember. The champion of justice will get back yo you as soon ax he remembers

Magnetta: I-um, well that starro guy is real nice, but.... aughh whats her name! i cant remember!

Simp: F-favorire p-person!? i-i-i-um uh um

Aella: Have I not made it abundantly clear? My beloved Astrion and Radio of course!

Sweets: Well I do love my sister, if only I could recall more about her. Aoki is very kind, though I havent seen him in a while, I should. Oh, and Lilith is very kind to me. and pretty but dont tell her I said that

Mist: her v

May: her ^

Void: Nobody really stays in the void long enough for me to create a real friendship, and the two I thought would stay, Drunkie and Lantern recently returned to the circus...

Feris: My new boss is pretty cool, and, I uh, dont like that hammer guy

Voltie: We-ell I-I havent ma-ade too ma-any friends but the-e Ocean lady is pre-etty neat!

Villain: I HATE SUN

The Pickle Stealer: I despise the pickle gifter, my arch nemesis [just accept you're gay already]

[Putting @ s for characters mentioned @the-moth-from-elsewhere @mod-autumn @xx-theblack-vixen-xx @spapman @sh4tt3rg1rl @feiar @star-on-a-beach ]

i’m going out and doing things today, soooo…you get your daily question early! As usual, all credits to autumn for the idea ^^

DAILY(?) QUESTION 3, ELECTRIC BEEGALEE:

Have your oc describe their favorite person/people! Optionally, have them also describe their least favorite people.

[etherealluminescence]

I asked my friend for ALL first obey me impressions, and was not disappointed. some screenshots below cause they’re funny to me.

Filler image

Lucifer

“Edgy supervillain vibes, lads”

“Where does he get those wings?”

“Like, what wing store?”

Safe to say they think Lucifer looks like a super villain sadist with weird a ass style. Can’t say they’re off the mark.

Certainly is a sadistic bastard with those vibes, but not completely on point.

Mammon

“Looks like a rockstar”

“I like his glasses” I too, like them my nonbinary pal.

“He looks like an electric type if he were a Pokemon.”

I mean yeah, they kinda have a point.

“It’s hard to decide because these boys are just lads” wow okay nice first impressions huh.

Leviathan

“Ok I redact my statement on hard to hate” yeah I redact my statement of being your best friend of 5+ years.

“First image looks like a war general, so that’s a red flag” in reference to the RAD uniform.

“Seems like the type to regularly visit the incel vibes of Reddit.” I showed them one of all of the characters casual, uniform, ur art, and demon form.

“I just get these vibes.” Yeah okay I get the vibe you are NOT a snek fan frfr bro.

Satan

“Catboy.”

“Next.”

I literally just showed them the uniform, casual, demon form, and card of Satan kitty and they were like no.

Not even insulting fashion just the fact he’s a catboy.

Asmodeus

“No thoughts head empty.” Yeah be amazed by his sexiness.

“His hair is cool.” 🥺🥺😎 ofc he’s Asmo.

“What are those wings I don’t think you can fly with those, stupid.” Oh...

“I just noticed the pants... too many belts.” Well okay then. 😭

Note to self they think Asmo is not beautiful except his hair.

Beelzebub

“Needs to lean in more with insect theme.” Proceeds to show me an orange glob from hollow knight?

“I like bugs.”

“He’s the 6’4 friend who would accept you being gay. He’s always hungry. I love him so much 🥺” - me cause I said they’re based off sins.

“It is no sin to savour a good meal my friend.” - them / probably beel’s senior quote

Belphegor

“Again with belts but I should expect this” WHAT DO THEY HAVE AGAINST FUNKY BELTS HUH.

“Tail is fluffy and cool but I hate his outfit the most.” Wow Satan got beat in worst outfit department.

“My eyes keep focusing on the cyan but the mustard yellow though 😔” fair enough.

“I know there’s a cow theme but those piebald doesn’t exactly help. The other outfits are fine.” When did you become a fashion genius bro.

I JUST LOVE THE SCREENSHOT SO MUCH WHAHA BEST RESPONSE THANKS

Diavolo

“Wear a shirt”

“It’s cold”

“Wait”

“Never mind it’s hell.” I didn’t actually say it was hot lmfaoo I’m mean.

“This man can create a fucking sun.”

“I don’t know anything.”

“He doesn’t like pickles.”

“Me too. Pinckle.”

Barbatos

Literally just this screenshot. Thanks for this, lad. The above screenshot not the bottom one the bottom one is Solomon.

Solomon

“Punk.”

“Just tell him his cooking is inedible.”

“Perfect candidate for fingers in his ass Sunday.”

Simeon

Sends me a fucking image of a LONG fishing hat. Cause fishing Simeon.

“I like his getup funky man.”

“Has the customer service smile and I’m not sure it’s genuine or not.”

“No thoughts, head empty the person.”

Luke

“Looks like this child can cook!” Yes my baby can.

“Vaguely reminds me of a small Victorian child.” Okay my son could be one...

“Just wants lunchables.” 😭😭

“I want lunchables too.” Yeah I’d give him my lunachables if he asked.

“I would eat lunchables with him.” :)) us and the baby.

MC

“Sheeple”

“I do not know what to think of this.”

“What.”

“Ok.”

“I- ok.”

In reaponse to me just memeing small sheep MC defeating the boys who are so strong.

I kept my promise thanks for your internet points 😎😎

[unreone]

A Happy Tree Friends AU Idea!

▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎

Somber Wood Foes AU

/ Inversed Au

▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎

Somber Wood Foes is the Opposite AU of Happy Tree Friends. The characters still dies for the sake of cosmic joke, but their personalities are flipped around.

▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎

Cuddles > Idles (hates being outside, ridiculously lacks energy to do anything, sad and droopy)

Giggles > Gruntles (grunge aesthetic, hates cute and girly stuffs, will def kick your ass if you flirt with her)

Toothy > Tiffy (tough, likes to fight, sharpens his teeth to look more intimidating, drags Idles outside for adventures)

Lumpy > Lucent (both antlers are upright, he deemed himself as the brightest of them all, hates mistakes, always over prepared, still dies even when prepared)

Petunia > Pungentia (trash is an aesthetic for her, her mess ends up killing others, she genuinely thinks she is beautiful with her "fashion")

Handy > Nimble (he was nimble until he lost his feet, a feet would be nice as a mail man)

Nutty > Natty (healthy living for the win, a promoter of fruits and vegetables, he keeps accompanying Sclutzy out of pity)

Sniffles > Sclutzy (antz is frients nat fud, was a genius but his sanity is now broken, enjoys destroying technology)

Pop > Top (he goes over the top on protecting Buc, wears a top hat, imposes too much rules and restrictions on Buc)

Cub > Buc (never died even once, actually curious on what dying feels like, was told to never go off without his father, dying for freedom)

Flaky > Ruby (she doesn't have flakes, fearless, adrenaline junkie, uses her quills as weapons when needed)

The Mole > The Watcher (his blue eyes get to shine, his beautiful eyes are just too distracting, some died because they were disracted by those ocean eyes)

Disco Bear> Discord Bear (extremely lacks confidence, bolts away at the sight of girl's shadow, dislikes disco since he can't dance)

Russell the Pirate > Rascal the Bandit (loves gold, hoards gold, will kill for anything that looks like gold)

Lifty > Wifty (loves giving, enjoys making stuffs from wood, doesn't see the value in gold and jewelry, too noisy to steal anything)

Shifty > Frankly (hates gambling, never lets his twin die, works honestly for money, wouldn't dare to enter the life of crime to survive, too full of conscience to steal anything)

Mime > Mike the Clown (he never talks but he's freaking loud, relies on visual gags and humiliation to entertain others, his noises may drive someone crazy)

Cro Marmot> Pro-Macro 2000 (a time traveller who's trapped in his time machine since it only runs on the specific electricity that they have in the future, every episode he'll try different type of morse codes to ask for help, the "help" he receives will lead to further sealment of his machine or death)

Flippy > Fiasco (Fiasco is a bloodthirsty executioner whose goal is to have the most kills each day. He is quick, ruthless, and loves the creativity in his kills. He avoids places containing wholesome stuffs since he will flip into his little alter, Freaky.)

Splendid > Insipid (wants to be villain but accidentally saves others, kryptonut boosts his powers)

Lammy > Luna (she thinks no one can see her, kills for entertainment, she blames the pickle and everyone believes her)

Mr. Pickles > Sir Prickly (tries to keep Luna from killing, fails to keep Luna from killing, an escapegoat, accepts the punishments so Luna wouldn't suffer)

Truffles > Trifled (he wants to be the center of everything, he'll make sure everyone notices him regardless of being alive or dead, the gags revolves around his ideas of stealing the spotlight)

Cursed Idol > Sacred Idol (You will not die as long as you have this, basically the totem of undying, however you will die in the most grotesque and horrible way the moment that you lost/let go of this)

Tell me what you think of this! I would like to make some concept arts one day but for now, I have no idea how :p

[writing-frenzy]

Plz let Airplane be awesome- Fic Rec

So I have a hankering for our favorite disaster of an author plz and thx. I went searching, daydreaming, and sometimes down right spelunking for some of that good Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky character fics. Did I also find some good tasty Moshang on the journey? Yes and it was good.

So, here is a place for all the treasure I managed to collect. Hope You all enjoy!~

(And any recs for more goodness will be fully accepted, plz!)

A Well Wherein Serpents Are Coiled by Nighthaunting - I am poison / And you will drink me / And you should be so lucky

Shang Qinghua transmigrates into his own terrible novel as a baby. The fact that this seems to be a world based on his first draft, where things actually happened and the plot did matter, is less than comforting. Having a second chance is nice, but ending up as cannon fodder and dying offscreen are the last things he wants to do. The only way to avoid his 'canonical' fate is to do as the System demands and try to fix his mistakes from within the world he created. Somehow this ends up with a bright-eyed and bushy-tailed Luo Binghe as an An Ding Peak disciple, because writing about a kid being miserable and seeing a kid being miserable are apparently two entirely different skillsets.

The best, my heart will not move on, I am sinking with this story, it has consumed me and all I can say is ‘thank you, but can I go even deeper?’ like... it has the best world building I have ever seen for any SVSS fanfic, it is canon in my mind and I just end up loving An Ding Peak even more? like wow, I did not know that was possible. Read the fic and the only regret you will have is that you have reached the last updated chapter so soon.

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pride is not the word I'm looking for by Tossawary - A Pre-Canon Canon Divergence fic. Shang Qinghua goes to take a self-indulgent peek at his baby protagonist son and gets a kick to the shrivelled heart for his troubles. Ahhh~! He gave up on changing canon or preventing character deaths years ago! What is he doing, helping his protagonist son's adoptive mother like this?

This story, this story, was one of the two to make me so damn hungry for all the Airplane!Shang Qinghua goodness. It leaves me wanting for more. (Also, give Airplane more family bonds and friendship, make our favorite little disaster feel things.)

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it must follow, as the night the day by Tossawary - Airplane Bro transmigrates into his own web-novel only to find out that the System messed up his world! Shang Qinghua is a demon in this world! All the characters supposed to be humans are demons in this world! And all the characters supposed to be demons are...?Moshang's first meeting in a Role Reversal AU.

Look, if I mention their first one, of course I have to mention the amazing Role Reversal au; I can’t not miss this beautiful piece of Demon!Airplane awkwardness of being hot for the icy cultivator who could easily gut him in a second. it is so good, I love.

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The An Ding Peak Lord's Holy Cheat Sheet by JerichoJaspersJeromeJr - There's a dozen basic things that Shang Qinghua should know but somehow doesn't. There's a hundred mysterious secrets that Shang Qinghua knows even when he shouldn't. There's a thousand profound mysteries that Shang Qinghua knows even when no mortal should. Mobei-jun has noted it all.

*Cackles* Kneel before our mighty god Airplane!  

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Keep Your Friends Close by HeavenlyDusk -  The one where Shang Qinghua and Scum Villain Shen Qingqiu become friends, except neither of them really know what friendship actually is.

This series, by all good fiction is so damn great! I live for this disaster friendship of Shen Jiu and Airplane (and only shit, I shouldn’t laugh, but cockblocking Shen Jiu is not something I expected, but Gives me a mighty need, even if he made it his mission for Moshang to never happen.)

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The Eye of the Emperor by fishpoets -  The attention of Great Lord Luo Binghe is not something to be coveted.

Now, this is Mobei-Jun’s POV in this one-shot, but just how soft he is with his hubby is so cute, and we get to see Shang Qinghua being a sneaky crafty and protective of his own hubby. for all of Luo Bingge’s threating aura, I can’t help but grin at how this couple, so determined to be there for each other, and ready to plot. 

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A Political Match by tuesday - It was the day of Shang Qinghua’s wedding, and he was going to be sick.

So... BL author Shang Qinghua accidently seduced his fav character, Mobei-jun, the fic. my only regret is that there isn’t more.

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unplanned by fencesit - Shang Qinghua doesn't mean to do it. Okay, okay, from the outside he totally gets how it looks purposeful. Definitely! It definitely looks like he planned it really carefully! Like, you can't just slip and whoops break someone out of Huan Hua Palace's Water Prison, you know?

:D Alternate first meeting and a tasty prison break? go get yo man my disaster fav.

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Sea foam and grenades by Sunnystar - Long before the Peaks were known for their esteemed cultivation, An Ding had another title. [A world where Shang Qinghua goes off plot for his children disciples.]

Ow, oww, owwww owwwwwww ouch! be prepared to have your heart pickled before your eyes, before it is roasted over an open fire and then promptly eaten before you. and with the left over crumbs of it left over, still find no, you have not had enough, you need to make sure your tear ducts are still existing after all... Just, make sure you mind the tags with this story, because it gets dark, bits of fluff seen here and there to at least trick you into thinking there is still a light hanging around. it is a lot to take in, but oh man are the emotions delicious even as I have to take breaks from this story because of all the feeling I have to face.

---

So, there ya have it; might have more added in the future, but for now, I at least wanted these up. Part Duo Here~

And feel free to add more, I am always up for more of our boi!

[queen-of-my-goofball-army]

"Sometimes the first villain that we love when we're a kid will remain one of our favorite villains when we're an adult. It might also cement your archetype for how you prefer your villains to be (me preferring them rather goofy than threatening.)" (Me.)

How many of you remember the first villain that you loved when you were a kid? The one that changed the way that you saw as "different" from all the others? For me, I remember mine. He's been a major comfort character of mine since I was five when the show was airing and I watched it with both my mom and my babysitter Natalie. Kim Possible as most of the fans would say it's a very special show. It was different from everything that was on at the time and it dealt with the trails and tribulations of teenage-hood differently too. But we're not here to talk about that. We are here to talk about the villains on Kim Possible. The villains were all equally creative and unique in their own rights, most people would say that there favorite was Shego, but if I'm being entirely honest if somebody forced my hand and made me pick between her or her copartner I would ALWAYS pick Dr Drakken.

Ever since I was a kid I've always preferred villains that were more comedic than an actual threat on cartoons. The start of that for me was with Dr Drakken. Whenever he wasn't the main villain in an episode I was so upset. He was the best part of the show when I was a kid. For some reason he was always the thing that stood out to me because I could maybe I could see him in that episode. Part of it was because he was just this childish character always having temper tantrums. It led to my favorite running gag on the show whenever he would get so mad that he ceased to remember words. (The other one being that you never actually figured out how his skin turned blue in the first place. The best thing that we know as the audience is that it happened on a Tuesday before the ending theme interrupted him.)

When I went back and rewatched the show when I got a little bit older I found that it was better than just having Drakken as the main villain. I found that I had a soft spot for Ron as well. But that never meant that my favorite character had changed. Drakken was always special for me. I never really loved villains when I was a kid I always rooted for the heroes. But in the case of Kim Possible I just loved every second that he was on screen. Whether that be him interacting with Shego, him explaining his dastardly plan knowing what would happen afterwards but just not being able to help himself, or just the daily antics that he would get into. My favorite was on the day that Shego took a vacation day he spent the entire day trying to open a jar of pickles. The entire day. And that scene gets funnier every time that I watch it. Now whenever I can't open something and I take it to my dad, even if it isn't a jar of pickles I still call it Operation Gerken. He never watched the show with me and I think that one day somebody will understand that reference and I'll be funny.

I loved that Drakken was allowed to be not *entirely* evil. He had childish interests. From the cocoa moo incident, to the time that both him and Ron loved the same childish Christmas special. He wasn't just your typical evildoer. But then he'd come back the next week doing the same shtick. When you meet the rest of his family you find that he actually might be the smartest person there. I mean he had a ditzy mom and an idiot for a cousin so that's not really saying a lot. I like to think that when he was Drew he was autistic. It's just a little HC that I have that I have a soft spot for.

When we talk about voice acting in animation one of the few that I mention first is John DiMaggio. He's one of animations biggest talents and has a really long list of credentials that make him the fantastic powerhouse that he is. If you've ever watched Futurama he was Bender, if you watched Adventure Time or Jake Long American Dragon he was talking dogs in both of those as Jake and Fu. Growing up I heard him everywhere it cartoons because in the early 200s he was on the top of the world. The entertaining factor was that it was always something different. Ever since I was a kid though I've always loved Drakken the most out of all his other roles. It was the most different sounding from his natural way of speaking. I've had Futurama on my list because I'm also a moderate Billy West fan as well and I know that show is where he really shines. DiMaggio's voice for Drakken is something that I never really forgot. It's a voice that stuck with me as a child whether it be randomly remembering a line of dialogue or his shampoo rap it's a voice that stuck with me. Also, Drakken has one of my favorite villain laughs of all time. I love just how crazy it sounds and it's one of my favorite things that I could listen to on a loop.

I'm currently just starting to rewatch Kim Possible for the fourth time and every time that I come back and rewatch the series I remember how much I love Dr Drakken. It was why Dr Doofenshmirtz always sort of bugged me because it felt like they were low key taking from KP. I love both of them because they are unique in their own rights but the similarities weren't going over my head when I was growing up. Throughout my childhood Drakken was the only villain that I loved and that is still true to this day. While I have found other villains that I loved nobody has ever come close to touching the best of them all in my opinion Drew Lipski or Dr Drakken.

[aquagirl1978]

Welcome back for week three of our review of Antares Fairchild. This set was a hot one, certainly the steamiest one so far. Let's get started!

#1 - Favorite line in set

aliboo: Sometimes, you hit a point in your life where you realize the only explanation for your choices is "it seemed like a good idea at the time." - Relatable, MC.

aqua: "I was planning on seducing you, actually." - I don't think anyone was expecting *that*!

violet: "If you value your life, be somewhere else."

#2 - Favorite scene/moment

aliboo: Let Antares seduce you (first heart scene in the set). How very dare he do THAT! Very Hot scene piling on the sexual tension, and was just.. unexpected. But with his ego, it wasn't out of place either!

aqua: MC telling Antares she was in his room to seduce him, his reaction and everything after - so hot! He doesn't even touch her - I can't wait to see the sparks fly when he finally does touch her.

violet: When she ran back into the building to see if he was ok. Putting all their banter and one-up manship aside, her immediate instinct was to check on him. I loved that as it speaks to so much of what is going on underneath the surface.

#3 - Did you buy hearts? Which scene(s)? Worth it?

aliboo: I got all of them. As always, they were all worth it. I have to say the first heart scene was my fav for obvious reasons, which is that no one is immune to Antares' seduction.

aqua: Of course I bought all of them! The cg is paywalled behind the last heart scene, so if you collect the cgs, that's the one to get. They're all really great though. *whispers* The first one tho....

violet: I got all of them and they were truly worth it, but the first one is a masterclass in how to make a scene sexy without the characters even touching.

#4 - Standout character

aliboo: Antares. Alongside 'the only scene I've talked about so far' ("If I set out to seduce you, Ms. Revati... you would be mine." - swoons), my other fav moments were basically anytime he behaved like a little shit, including (1) His antics when they reach Omia - technically not going back on his word, clever. (2) His annoyance and wounded pride at getting caught up in the blast and then whiplash as he waltzes off with Psyri. (3) "If you value your life, be somewhere else." to the spaceport worker. Brutal.

aqua: Antares, always Antares. He's such a dominant presence throughout these sets - he doesn't even need to touch MC to get certain reactions out of her. And he was so brutal this week for not just restraining MC and keeping her on his ship for "three galactic standard hours", but also later when he ran off with Psyri, leaving MC in the dust. I can just see that cape flapping in the wind during all these antics.

violet: Antares for me. When he listens to what MC has to say about her family and why she does the job she does, the respect he showed her in that moment, small as it may have been. I love seeing the cracks in his "Captain Fairchild" persona. Cracks created by the MC, however unwittingly.

#5 - Thoughts on the CG?

aliboo: I love it! I'm still pissed that I thought it was going to be something else though haha.

aqua: I didn't know what to think when I saw the preview, but was quite pleased with the cg. My only issue is - why only one eye? Why???

violet: It was a different angle of the backed up against the wall position we have seen in other CGs and I liked it. It really made you feel his presence.

#6 - Fave screenshot

aliboo:

aqua:

violet:

#7 - Secondary character shining moment.

aliboo: MC - "I was planning on seducing you, actually" - amazing! And her absolute boldness throughout (especially if you play the heart scenes!)

aqua: Let's be real - this is not a route filled with tons of secondary characters. It is very Antares x MC heavy. That said, my vote goes for Psyri for continuing to be a complete mystery to everyone. And for creating that special failsafe. it did lead to the great scene later between our two leads, but did ya have to drop an entire building on Antares?

violet: Keda. She's proven time and again what a good friend she is to MC. And holy hell is she tal.

#8 - Thought on the villain.

aliboo: The Union will be the common enemy and we haven't seen too much of them YET. It was no surprise that they cancelled MCs contract though.

aqua: Becoming clear that the Union will be the villain. Really did not like that officer ending MC's contract like that. Tho now she has no reason not to side with Antares.

violet: The UNION. I happen to agree with a certain grumpy pilot when he says the Union sucks.

#9 - Most OMG scene?

aliboo: Just one? I'll choose the moment they reach Omia and Antares follows his agreement with MC to the letter, meaning that as soon as they were no longer working together, he could do what he wanted - ie. detain her. It was another moment I hadn't predicted, but the OMG scenes after that were less of a shock as I was starting to expect his Little Shit behaviours.

aqua: When Psyri activated her failsafe, and dropped an entire building on Antares. His poor cape didn't quite survive that moment. Rip billowing cape.

violet: When MC says "I was trying to seduce you." I think we all went...wait, WHAT? Girl of all the things you could have said. Although it did lead into that heart scene so I'm not mad at all.

#10 - Any predictions for next week?

aliboo: Urgh, I'm terrible at this! Antares to the rescue! He will rescue MC from her current pickle and find out that she is in much debt, has no contract and no credits to send to her parents. And then he will Hire her.. to be his prisoner / assistant / whatever his latest kink is.

aqua: Whatever his latest kink is? 😂 Hmm...I'm kinda terrible at this too, so I'm sure this is all wrong. The Union figured out MC was still tracking Psyri and have come directly for her. So it's their gunshots aiming at MC. Of course, it would be really amazing if it was the Starship Promise crew popping up - or even just Orion. Speaking of Orion....no direct mention of him this season so far.

violet: She and Antares will join forced against the Union and work together to find the downed ship. And I HOPE there will be more banter. And more shirtless Antares. And more mini CGs of other Antares body parts cause Voltage is feeling generous towards us right now.