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Dragon Age Veilguard: Love, Wisdom and Pride
A very long Dragon Age post!
Warnings for: Veilguard Spoilers, Solavellan spoilers.
Okay, so I will preface this by saying that this ‘analysis’ primarily focuses on Solas’ arc; both romanced and unromanced. It isn’t intended to be a romanticised analysis, though it is very much enamoured with how a romanced Solas and his relationship with Lavellan foils (and informs my reading/reception of) that of Solas and Mythal’s relationship in Veilguard. There is a relationship I will address that I feel does parallel Solas and Mythal! Scroll down to “Reading Between the Lines” if you wanna skip my little intro below. Spoilers follow.
Truth be told, I wasn’t ever expecting much in terms of actually getting a sequel to Inquisition. The game dev market went through a tumultuous reshuffle before the remake madness breathed life back into many studios. Bioware game sequels (Mass Effect Andromeda) were underwhelming and not as fleshed out since the EA acquisition. I absolutely believe Bioware would have been shunted had Mass Effect Legendary Edition not been so successful. EA’s reputation was always lacklustre and underhanded, but laying off or losing several head writers attached to Bioware with almost two decades of work under their belts was the biggest red flag. Trevor Morris not being asked to return in exchange for a ‘bigger name’ was also a grave warning that returning to the atmosphere, ambience and world of Thedas that we knew was getting further and further away from a plausible reality. And on top of that, there’s the fact Solas was never intended as a romance interest during early development of Inquisition.
Solavellan seemed doomed!
Despite this, I still held out hope for a sequel, but I feared we’d always be in permanent Solavellan/developmental hell. Heck, I’m still waiting for a Beyond Good and Evil sequel—the game released in 2003! So, actually witnessing people play Veilguard, seeing reactions to it, seeing memes and gifs and essay pieces (like this one), it’s like my community has awoken again, and I never thought I’d see the day. Yet I am not blind to the fact we were robbed of so much potential. I knew thing’s wouldn’t live up to re-emerging expectations when Dragon Age: Dreadwolf was rebranded to Veilguard—the shift seemed to imply less of a primary focus on Solas (and apparently, according to the artbook, the early concept art proves this implication correct).
Things seemed even more dire when the devs revealed there was no tapestry mechanic. I had only one hope: that with the Inquisitor’s confirmed return, we’d get at least some form of catharsis for our Inquisitors (Lavellans and otherwise), if we couldn’t get the conclusions to so many storylines present in each of our worldstates. My main fear was that they’d go the clichéd Ultimate Sacrifice route (which happens anyway, but in a way that makes thematic sense given the stakes and heavily blighted worldstate).
Suffice it to say, there was a lot of evidence that Veilguard would disappoint me in the end. But it hasn’t. It hasn’t lived up to the many expectations and marks of excellence that the Dragon Age world built itself into with the first three entries, that’s for sure, but I am also just so deprived of conclusions, of endings (whether it be because TV doesn’t exist in a sustainable format anymore or that comicbook movies are made with a sequel in mind, never letting anything just “Exit Stage Left” gracefully; or the fact we live in a regurgitating content cycle with late-stage-capitalism where anything remotely profitable gets turned into a caricature of itself: Squid Game, Star Wars, etc.). The cycle is so exhaustive that I am actually at a point where I can say I am content with the ending we were given (on a Solas/Solavellan front), Veilguard gave me relief, and beautiful, achy pain to boot. Though I would absolutely be disappointed by both the "non-romanced Solas" endings, given that Solas winds up either "dying alone, forever" or turns to Tyranny.
Now onto the actual review of that Solavellan ending, Mythal and themes of Love!
Note: I have only gotten the ‘best’ ending in my first playthrough, but I also thought the consequences of not maxing factions would be more… dire? Another note, pls, if your romanced Inky swore to stop Solas, how does that ending differ, if at all? Let me know, I’m dying here!
Sidenote: I’m working on writing another review about my views on the ‘sanitised’ worldstate, the new companions (and why I think Varric was the wrong choice to have as an advisor in the game, given that the Inquisitor or Morrigan would have been more impactful; and not to mention that Cole or Briala should have been companions), removal of the tapestry and what it means for the future of stories in Thedas (The Story We Lost is such a poignant compilation of the sheer volumes of lost lore and depth that I honestly think I won’t go as in-depth on that review as this one), and why I think Veilguard is my final entry into Dragon Age.
Reading Between the Lines: What Pride Hath Wrought
One thing is for sure, Trick Weekes flourishes when writing within the ambiguities and complexities of meaning. This makes every word uttered by Solas so great to dissect, he's a god of lies not because he 'lies' but because he's so careful with how he phrases things, what he holds back, and what he reveals.
For instance, the famous Trespasser exchange where Solas mocks his own follies with sarcasm by saying:
“What is the old Dalish curse? May the Dread Wolf Take you.”
Then a softer, more saddened and beaten-down Lavellan replies:
“And so he did.”
This irks him. Because he then realises in that moment that he absolutely did take advantage, but for some reason he frames it around sex rather than power because that’s easier to address than the latter. And he rejects the notion, even though he brought up the expression he knows to mean nothing close to a sexual inuendo for being ‘taken’, and yet he has the gall to try and derail the conversation by pivoting and saying:
“I would not lay with you under false pretences.”
When I first had this dialogue exchange, I was baffled, because did this mean that there was another meaning to ‘Dread Wolf take you’ that Dalish clans lost through the years, or was it more of a self-deprecating joke Solas had with himself because he, the Dread Wolf, romanced (took) a Dalish Inquisitor (away from her people’s beliefs, histories, past), and he found irony in the saying?
On the surface, “wouldn’t lay with you under false pretences” could simply mean “we didn’t sleep together” or “we did sleep together, but I wasn’t taking advantage as the Dread Wolf, I was simply Solas in your presence”. But I have recently thought of a more… ambiguous reading. Lay could have been used in a milder, more vulnerable way; to mean to be at peace, to be completely vulnerable, as if to sleep. In that sense, the phrasing becomes: “I could not be at peace with you because I was living a half-truth”.
I absolutely think the moment he feels he is truly beyond hope is when we see his expression of abject horror as Lavellan shouts: “I would have had you trust me!”. He realises then that he did fuck up, he did take the choice away from her because he thought he knew better, him and his pride led to a decision that hurt someone close to him, and he could finally see how wrong he was, how alike the entire situation became to Mythal’s treatment of him. Especially if Lavellan asks to go with him. Because he can see that despite the hurt, the lies and the betrayal on his part, Lavellan still wishing to join him draws too close to his first regret: following Mythal.
Whether he likes it or not, Solas’ love which could burn like a bonfire was directed at a powerful woman—a Herald, an Inquisitor—and inspite of her greatness of character, it still shaped her into someone willing to follow him on his dinanshiral out of love, much like he left the Fade and took physical form for Mythal. So now whenever I hear Lavellan shout “Var lath vir suledin”, Solas replying with “I wish it could, Vhenan,” changes drastically with the Mythal reveal, knowing he always walks away from the Inquisitor in Trespasser.
“I wish it could, Vhenan” sounds heavily like: “You would regret me, as I regret Mythal, and I cannot bear for that to happen us.” More poetically, it could read as: “I wish our love could overcome a duty that has lasted an incomprehensible amount of time, I wish I could change my nature, but then I’d be twisted into a demon, like the spirit of Wisdom in the Dales; and yet again, I would become your regret.” These two readings are very, very romantic. Realistically, given what we know of his kinship with Felassan, and how they were comrades and friends for centuries (“A story unfinished. His back turned!”), and given what we know of the complexity of Mythal’s will that presides over the creation of his very being, and yet he was still able to muster the strength to kill a fragment of her to fulfil his mission, “I wish it could” was most probably a lament: “Do not ask me to hurt one of the two women I’ve loved on this journey, because if it ever came to it…” he would.
Knowing what I know of Solas, of how he was able to convince himself that Varric’s death (avoidable as it was) was just another necessary step, that it was just another sacrifice, another loss that would be worth something only if he completed his ritual, I have no doubt that Solas would also be able to rationalise hurting Lavellan (which is why in his mind, turning away from her, breaking her heart, leaving with no explanation and aiding her in Trespasser so she could live whatever few years remained in “relative peace” is actually an act of preserving that love). I partially think the reason he reveals the truth in Trespasser (especially for a romanced Lavellan) is in the hopes his ‘truths’ will push her away. But on a deeper note, I think he also thinks of it as some twisted form of repaying her for loving him to the point that he could have almost forgotten what it was to be the Dread Wolf, to just be with her as Solas, that night at Crestwood. Maybe his harsh truths would push her to the point where she’d give up her love for Solas, now that she knew he was the Dread Wolf, freeing her from the shackles of their love. He’s very self-flagellating, all about self-sacrifice for the ultimate goal, the ends always justify the means, he will endure any pain and punishment as long as Arlathan returns in the end.
What is his love of a mortal compared to the despair and loss of an entire empire? Solas views himself as selfish for falling for her, and that nearly broke him, if he was selfish enough to leave the dream of Arlathan behind for her, what would that do to his spirit then?
In his way of thinking, perhaps telling the Inquisitor the truth is a way out, a rationale they can use to justify stopping him or to make it easier to hate him as the Dread Wolf rather than love him as Solas (someone he hasn’t been in so long).
‘Masking’ as the Dread Wolf
During Trespasser, the Inquisitor has every right to despise Solas after all they’ve learned, and I think he half reveals the truth as a tactic so the Inquisitor can have an excuse to hate him, to be driven to anger and have less pull over his choices, once they learn the truth. Solas is particularly skilled at making other’s play the role that makes his own choices seem inevitable, he orchestrates a lot of events to play out in a manner where it's easier for him to talk himself into bringing down the veil.
He goads Elgar’nan to anger easily. He inspires the spirits to fight for him to the death as a necessary distraction during the war. He absolutely allows the Inquisitor to speak to him one last time so he can offer insight, yes, but also so he can easily frame his actions as just and inevitable. But, Oh boy does he get in for a shock if the Inquisitor shows empathy towards him, it scares him because he’s become accustomed to being seen only as the Dread Wolf. To be understood? That gives way to remorse. And remorse gives way to doubt. And he cannot doubt his purpose, twisted as it is, it is all he has left of his former self. Without it he would most likely change into something different. Someone he doesn’t recognise.
This fear intensifies more so if a romanced Lavellan asks to go with him, and in that case, he takes command and distances himself away (rejecting the help of someone close to him; the chance for a possible betrayal; the chance at another Felassan or Mythal [x]; the chance to twist Lavellan outside of her purpose, in this case, the purpose would be love/empathy) but not without showing remorse at having sacrificed yet another relationship for his crusade.
“Ir abelas.”
Sorrow for what cannot be is at the heart of why the Solavellan romance is so powerful, especially because even though both Solas and Lavellan love each other passionately, love alone cannot be enough when faced with regrets. Love would ultimately be stifled. Corrupted into something else over time. And so, for Solas, having loved and lost tragically is better than having loved and corrupted.
He will not do to Lavellan what was done to him, even if it is her choice, because she knows so little, her naivete cannot close the distance of a millenia’s old sea, and it would hurt him immensely to take advantage of her kind heart [x].
By leaving, he keeps her heart pure. And the yearning! Knowing the love is there, but on its own it cannot be invulnerable to corruption, so it is better to lose it than twist it. Ugh! Him leaving Lavellan is the ultimate show of love! IT IS A WISE DECISION. A rare glimpse into pure wisdom. Which is why he kneels beside Lavellan in Trespasser, he does not “Stand Tall” in the face of Wisdom’s heart. He kneels beside her. And when he stands tall again, he is Solas once more, filled with regret, and once through the eluvian, he returns to masking as the Dread Wolf.
Sidenote: It’s especially confounding that Veilguard allows Rook to push the Inquisitor to save or stop him after you’ve reached act 2 despite your world state choice (I think this was done in case they feared the Inquisitor wouldn’t stand by Solas after everything he was revealed to be responsible for in Veilguard, however it doesn’t work because the Inquisitor wasn’t an advisor, Rook never told them what they learned from the wolf statues, so having a stranger hold the ability to make Lavellan keep her promise or not rings hollow). Personally, I wish the Inquisitor’s presence had more weight in the non-Solavellan endings, too. I wish the Inquisitor could end up being the last friend/former love that Solas destroys (if you don’t collect the wolf statues) which then prompts Rook to fight him because Solas’ last tie to empathy failed to redeem him, that the Inquisitor falling is the last straw and Solas snaps, choosing to be a villain in the hopes of being stopped because he can’t stop himself, and not the ‘I am a God’ ending they gave us. Same for if your Inquisitor vows to stop him. I also wish the Inquisitor was the one to do the wolf statue missions. Would have been a nice secondary protagonist mission like the switching perspectives between Kratos and Atreus in GOW: Ragnarök (the old guard and the new; Inquisitor and Rook). I would have loved if they dedicated more dialogue to Inquisition days too, which is why I think Cole should have been a companion (if he wasn’t recruited, he could simply be a compassion spirit that ‘follows’ the greatest pain in the Fade that yearns to be healed, giving a compassionate viewpoint to Solas’ folly; recruited Spirit Cole could have a greater connection to Solas than even Varric, seeing as Cole was most likely a literal representation of Solas rewriting his own history by preventing a spirit from becoming too ‘real’; Human Cole would have a deeper connection to the world of Thedas, and could have been a great tool to prove how change was inevitable, not always a bad thing, and inevitably out of even Solas’ control. But alas, we live with what we are given! Even Imshael could have served in this role! Spirit/Demon of choice and it wasn’t incorporated into the game that supposedly asks you to make the greatest world-changing choice ever; redeem the Dread Wolf or end the age of the Evanuris entirely?!
Now onto the next segment: I want to talk about Solas’ regrets and how I read the ‘love story’ between Solas and Mythal, and why Lavellan (and what she represented) wasn’t enough to get through to him (and that’s a very believable thing, that’s what makes their love both tragic and epic!).
The High Price of Redemption
A romanced Lavellan has the most agency to see through his guises, if she resolves to save him, but even she cannot undo the shackles that still bind him to Mythal—the binds that twisted Wisdom so far from its purpose it became Pride, even when he burned (Mythal) from his face. (Likewise, A close friend Inquisitor who promises to save him is most likely a parallel to Felassan, again, they cannot undo the shackles of regret either.) I fully believe the vallaslin had a deeper magic than simply marking one as being committed/devoted to an Evanuris, I think it linked them magically, and since Solas was the first to burn the vallaslin away, he probably wasn’t as good at severing the link on himself as he was for other elvhen, so maybe a part of Mythal’s will still lingers in him, twisting him to Pride still.
In Veilguard’s final confrontation, I love the intention of showing how Lavellan approaches Solas slowly, as she doesn’t know who she’ll be faced with up those steps, Dread Wolf or Solas. But when she speaks to him, trying to get him to change his mind yet again, forgiving him for his wrongs, we are reassured that Wisdom hasn’t been completely consumed by Pride despite everything we’ve witnessed in the game because he bows his head at her in reverence as he apologises.
He shows humility towards her. He elevates her and her enduring love as worthy of his respect, but he does not consider himself worthy of hers. Thus, Lavellan pries open the door to acceptance but his heart is still not enough. Which is why love alone cannot turn the tide. He’s too broken to accept it. He doesn’t think he deserves it, so the only way out is through; to continue the ritual, to prove he was right. The shackles persist. Varric’s death weighs on his conscience now more than ever. Possibly members of Rook’s team too if they died on his crusade. But he is vulnerable enough for Morrigan to approach, and now Rook can use Mythal’s essence to make the final push. The only way he could be with Lavellan, the only way he could atone for the past and shed the weight of his armour (his crushing duty to the Elvhenan) is as Wisdom, fully restored, unbound by mistakes.
“Ar lasa mala revas.” He could only find absolution once Mythal (the angered and more brash essence of Mythal, the one unchanged by Flemeth and all the human women’s lives she’s been shaped by, but the closest iteration to that of Mythal in Arlathan, the version that he perceives as having every right to be angry at him for turning his back on her, for not going that last final stretch with her and subsequently, not being by her side when she died) severed the final connection: facing his regrets, showing humility and apologizing, while not taking away the blame but sharing it.
What is Benevolence without Wisdom if not Hubris?
We know Elgar’nan was twisted to Tyranny during the war, and I saw a post somewhere where someone wondered what led to his corruption, and what he was before (leadership/command). Likewise, Mythal was not above corruption.
So far, I’ve seen a lot of takes on Solas’ ties to Mythal, the power dynamic of being a student/disciple enamoured (could be romantic) with the benevolence of Mythal, but not how Mythal’s purpose was possibly also twisted towards hubris the moment she asked Wisdom to turn physical and build weapons from its knowledge, twisting it to Pride. Without Elgar’nan’s tyranny to rally against after the war with the Titans, Mythal would most likely turn a similar route, seeing her ruling as “necessary” for the people: “If not me then who?”. And that is a very short stop and quick drop to “I am your all-powerful ruler, I liberated you, and only I can guide the way”. Benevolence twisted by hubris can easily turn to Tyranny too, only one more subtle, a kind of cultish indoctrination compared to violent subjugation. If Solas had not turned his back on Mythal when she chose to be Evanuris (a god over her people) then they most likely would have made the worst (best) pair in the Evanuris. Pride is the Seventh Deadliest Sin. But imagine Pride next to Godhood?! That is frightening. So, when Solas burns the vallaslin, walks away and works against the Evanuris, I believe that he also inadvertently stops Mythal from becoming a corrupted version of herself. The sorrow at having lost her closest confidant and “love” grounds her, keeps her saintly in Solas’ mind, and in some ways, perhaps saves the Elvhen empire from a worse fate than him erecting the veil to begin with. But neither of them ever consider this. And I think that sort of self-blindness perfectly encapsulates how flawed both Mythal and Solas are. Now onto love.
Solas and Mythal – a Love too complex to simply classify as mortal ‘Love’.
There’s no doubt Mythal and Solas shared a deep bond, one that definitely had love in it, when we hear Mythal calling him ‘love’, without the possessive ‘my’ in front of it, it’s easy to misconstrue what type of love they share. A small nitpick, but like a thorn, it applies sometimes just enough pressure to change a perspective. Not calling Solas “My love” but instead choosing to simply use “love” works within those wonderful ambiguities/complexities that Weekes thrives in.
If one started out as a spirit, it’s safe to say concepts like familial bonds, romantic bonds, and blood ties mean little to nothing. There is no one type of love and there is every kind of love all at once. It is only once physical bodies are introduced, that physical touch, the ability to stab someone in the back, to kiss out of affection, to hug out of empathy, to strike out of anger, that love now becomes this twisted thing too. There are no spirits of love because spirits always possessed love, but there are demons of Desire (Gluttony) and of Rage (love denied).
I believe, from DGL’s acting skills, his soft whisper, his almost submissive smallness in the breadth of Mythal’s already soft voice, that Solas was in love with Mythal, devoted as a student, beguiled by her benevolence, content even in her shadow, and possibly star-struck. He was in love with someone who doesn’t have the possibility to love him back the same, it is not in her nature to love those beneath her in the same intensity that those who look up to her do. It’s like a priest being in love with God. The priest can devote themselves, sacrifice everything, but a God will always love their flock equally, but they can still play favourites.
Benevolence cannot be enamoured with Wisdom because to be truly benevolent they must possess Wisdom but there is also Pride to be had in walking beside benevolence, but they can never be on equal footing. Likewise, Solas’ love is not reciprocated entirely by Mythal, but she does love him back in her own way. While Mythal is definetly Solas’ first love, layered and complex, it is also strangled by regrets and twisted by uneven scales of power. It would never be a nurturing love, only a consuming kind.
When he speaks of Mythal during the Solavellan ending, he calls her his “oldest friend”, much like what Mythal says, (paraphrasing) “would you have me be angry at my oldest companion whose experienced so much with me”. Because friendship is perhaps the easiest way to describe their companionship. They went through many iterations, one certainly holding romantic tensions (specifically from younger Solas), but ultimately, with that much time shared, kinship/friendship becomes the easiest to surmise. You can love your friends, fall in love with them, fall out of love with them, only to love them again, be disappointed in them, etc.
Media today is flushed with romance as a linchpin for driving a hero to make dire choices, and that has warped our perception of how a platonic/non-romance-based relationship can be all-consuming, and sometimes more impassioned than strict romance. But, to make it easier for people to understand Solas’ motivations, it's easier to see their love in the light Taash sees it (an unreliable, somewhat “still juvenile” narrator, in that they are still growing into themselves and their culture and the world): “They were doing it”.
However, Bellara, a companion whose entire companion story is linked to her strong, deeply character-driving relationship with her brother (platonic love) refutes that reading by saying (paraphrasing here): “We don’t know if their ‘love’ is the same type of love we tend to think of in a masculine and feminine relationship.”
Felassan’s letter after the Mythal Dragon fight alludes to Solas having been in love with Mythal, but nothing about how she felt. This is why I consider the Solas/Mythal relationship to be more of a one-sided romantic love, but a requited ‘love’ relationship for them both.
A parallel I find so compelling: Solas and Mythal vs Briala and Celene. Solas and Briala both hold deep emotions for people in great power with the ability to end a tyrannical cycle of subjugation, enslavement and classism, yet for both of these ruler’s charisma and well-meaning intent, they often are swayed to side with tyranny. For Mythal, that was Elgarnan, the Evanuris who made all the other’s worse tyrants; as well as her own hubris for believing her presence alone could dampen the ravenous hunger for power that the rest of the Evanuris held at the small prospect of leading the Elvhen in a time of confusion (being a North Star is hard when all the other lights around you aim to blind the flock into submission). For Celene, this is more about the nuances of retaining favour, pull and power over other noble families, their backing (be it financial, political or simply cut-throat), and their support so she can be the ‘lesser of two evils’ compared to Gaspard’s warmongering personality and Florianne simply being a puppet with no backbone. Both Briala and Solas are turned to pawns despite their immense strength and compassion for their respective elven plights; Briala is rendered a fangless lion (for lack of a better metaphor) if she is reunited with Celene, whereas if she is chosen to puppet Gaspard, there’s every likelihood her story could parallel a ‘power-mad’ Solas if he’d been tethered to Rage (at betrayal) and not Regret (at having not rejected Mythal when she asked him to take a physical body) throughout his tenure as the Dread Wolf.
Solas and Lavellan – a Heart that was never intended to be Given/Taken
Now I will compare the lack of possessives in front of Mythal’s “love” to Solas declaring Lavellan as ‘Vhenan’ and then ‘Ar lath, ma Vhenan’ vs ‘Ar lath ma vhenan'; again, the coma is the thorn, the pause that shapes the quiet unsaid things we can deduce. In the Trespasser cutscene DGL puts the pause after “Ar lath”, even though the subtitles construct the sentence with Vhenan as a proper noun since it’s a nickname often used by Solas: “Ar lath ma, Vhenan”. But I believe Solas actually says “Ar lath, ma Vhenan”.
With “Ar lath, ma Vhenan” the stressor is after the pause, so the line reads: “I love [you], my heart.” And with “Ar lath ma, Vhenan” it makes even less structural sense but can be inferred to mean: “I love you, Heart”.
The possessiveness of “My” is what definitively differentiates the love Solas feels for Lavellan as one more of the romantic side, it is a love of yearning and desire and a wish to have one last good thing that is pure and incorruptible. The one thing he had left to give. His heart. But that does not mean his heart is enough! The rest of him is still bound to the love of Mythal that was twisted through the ages. That changed him. And given how Pride often comes before a fall, I absolutely understand why Solas is actually very brash and ill-considering when he’s romancing Lavellan (“The kiss was ill-considered”/”It would be kinder in the long run”/”I wanted to show you what you mean to me”). He's on a precarious cliff during Inquisition. His first plan failed. He's allowed ancient elvhen magic to fall into a blighted Tevinter magister's hands. Literally everything the Inquisition did could have been for nought if the Mark had fallen to the wrong person. Things could have easily fallen apart for Solas too, so why not indulge in something trifling and fleeting? Execpt it wasn't trifling. Nor was it fleeting. And when he saw that the fall could potentially not happen, that the Inquisitor could do it, save Thedas and retrieve the orb, he was struck by the gravity of his brashness, of letting impulses control him instead of acting according to a plan. But it was too late. They'd both fallen for each other.
Solas didn’t expect to form entanglements within the Inquisition. He was committed. He was angry at the world, “walking through a sea of tranquil”, called flat-ear by the Dalish that later chased him from their village when he proved he was the Dread Wolf. He was despised by people who looked like him. Spirits were constantly being abused and turned into demons. People erected monuments to heroes who slew demons. Mages were caged. Elves were subjugated. The empire fell. Humans razed the lands with their wars and petty squabbles of succession. The darkspawn tainted the land. The dwarves would never dream. Solas awoke to the worst possible fate; in his eyes, it was all his fault.
So when he kisses Lavellan in the Fade, impulsively, he isn’t kissing her there because it is less ‘real’ than if they kissed while she was awake, it makes it so much more real. He’s kissing her in the space where he is most himself. Where he can shed the body he was forced to build and trap himself within, the body of Pride. He is acting on the impulses of an enlivened Wisdom spirit that does not consider tomorrow, for the first time in a long time. It isn’t a long game with Lavellan, like so much of his life has been about always thinking to the future, always considering the outcome, machinating, scheming, the wiles and woes of every trickster god in mythology. It’s being in the moment with her that is all-consuming. It lowers his guard, leaves him vulnerable, and when she enquires about the Fade or spirits or histories, he gets to be useful as pure Wisdom again.
Lavellan challenging him when he first shows animosity or irritation towards the Dalish (a prideful act), and then him being taken aback when she explains that maybe the Dalish could be shown another way (making him consider her words, being given a morsel of wisdom back, reminding him of his old self), these are all small moments where Solas can begin to see springs of hope in the broken world. And that’s terrifying. It means he’s destroying not just himself, but the memory of Mythal and Arlathan too, all for the love of a woman who fell for an apostate.
The best, most genuine unmasking of Solas for me is during Wicked Hearts, when he’s tipsy on wine, has no inhibitions, and revels in the intrigue, the gossip, the dancing, the music (something we now know is important enough to have an entire music room in the Lighthouse), the sex! He is at his most relaxed, and then he asks Lavellan to dance, not caring about how it would look for the “Inquisitor’s serving man, Solas” to be intimate in a fucking Orlesian palace with the Herald of Andraste, right after stopping an assassination attempt! He finds comfort in the world of Thedas at that moment. Something he rarely shows so outright.
When he takes Lavellan to Crestwood to confess, I believe removing her vallaslin wasn’t entirely just for her, it wasn’t just to free her from slave markings or to simply reveal a form of a truth he wanted to tell her, it was to resolve himself of what his first purpose was supposed to be, what she distracted him from. Removing the vallaslin had been something he’d done for the slaves of Arlathan, it was what earned him the mantle of Dread Wolf. When he removes Lavellan’s vallaslin, he resets.
Thedas cannot allow Wisdom to truly exist without fear of corruption to Pride, Thedas the world he was responsible for shaping, literally the Maker of the Veil, and he falls for a woman Heralded as Andraste’s Chosen One, Mythal’s incarnation in the South. The irony. The cruel, cruel irony. The Inquisition is tied to his past, every Andrastian he meets, every Dalish person with vallaslin on their face, every slave or city elf. Tevinter worshiping the dragons that still have the essences of the Old Gods. His heart alone cannot withstand all of the punishing, gruelling, oppressive weight that is Thedas. Even for Lavellan. So he frames their romance as this tragic, short-lived tale that was beautiful but ultimately destined to end. He expects it to pass for her, she’s mortal after all. But he also leaves his heart with her, literally giving her power over the last uncorrupted part of himself. Think Will Turner and Elizabeth Swann at the end of World’s End, but metaphorically. He gives her his heart to safe keep as he goes on a journey that could corrupt a heart, turn it cold and bitter, destroy it.
Ar lasa mala revas. You are free.
He frees his heart.
Lets it go.
Twice!
So only once he is relinquished of his regrets, once Mythal does the same for him, only then is there “Nothing left except their love”. Because Lavellan still held his heart there was still something left after. Something beyond despair and regret and loss. He had given his heart to her to safekeep. And she did. Lavellan returns his heart to him when he is freed. What Mythal had to break so Solas could heal right again (like a bone), Lavellan casts a splint around so it can be set and heal properly. This is the difference between Mythal’s love and Lavellan’s. Both Mythal’s love and forgiveness broke him, but Lavellan’s love gives him the strength to Stand Tall one last time.
Solas, before Pride alone, as Wisdom (perhaps Solas always meant both Standing Tall and Wisdom, for Wisdom can grant one pride to stand tall for what they believe in), finds contentment with the rare and marvellous spirit that endured (his Vhenan). Wisdom endured because of humanity, something benevolence is beyond.
Bellanaris
When Lavellan offers to go with him, to continue on the dinanshiral that she already considers herself a part of, Solas is legitimately taken aback. His expression is soft yet full of disbelief and awe. He actually stops walking a few frames before Lavellan says this, as if hoping Lavellan would say something to him!
And then she basically proposes to him! “Bellanaris!” I absolutely adore the fact that Lavellan promises them eternity. A vow as sacred as a death right, as protected as an ancient, elvhen, undisturbed burial ground in the face of Orlesian colonialisation. They endured and now they will have an eternity. For once, we have an elvish tale that is not a curse, it is a love story with reunion at its core, where both elves reclaim something precious that was denied them.
Lastly, i am absolutely frothing at the mouth that Solas and Lavellan primarily speak in elvish! And even more feral at the fact Solas does not try to talk her out of joining him (because this sweet talker very well could!). He simply tells her where he is going is terrible. And she shuts that shit down immediately. No repeat of Trespasser. She's standing beside him, the South has all but fallen, whatever ties yet survive are strained, and she has fought the good fight for 8 years. I think the Inquisitor was about ready to leave Thedas behind.
The last decisions Solas makes are of his own volition. Entering the Fade for atonement. Stepping into the Fade with Lavellan (It was confirmed by Weekes that Lavellan’s presence in the Fade prison would fundamentally change it in a way we haven’t seen!). Thanking Rook for giving him one last shot at getting happiness. All his own!
This is the look of a man finally reunited with his wife! So much emotion in ONE frame. God! There’s never been a character like him. A love story like theirs! I’m so happy I got to see this ending. Full circle!
P.S. If you read this far, woah nelly! That’s crayyzeee, so here are some more great pieces: Why it was important for Lavellan to kneel for Solas as he knelt for her in Trespasser in the Solavellan ending [x], and here’s a great deep-dive on Solas as a spirit of Wisdom [x].
#dav#dav spoilers#solas#solas x lavellan#solavellan#mythal#datv spoilers#dragon age veilguard#veilguard spoilers#dragon age#dragon age veilguard spoilers#the dread wolf finally took her#his war has ended#their love may endure for eternity
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"A Song to Gather Witches"
Taglist- @skittlebum @circe143 @quailbagutte
Summary: You've got your powers Agatha found a way to make them useful for your cons scamming gig, this time you've witnessed her do it draining witches seeing her purple -Chapter IV
Chapter I
Chapter II
Chapter III
===============================
The saloon was dimly lit, filled with the smell of smoke and aged wood, the murmur of voices and clinking glasses creating a lively atmosphere. Amidst the crowd, the young reader sat on a small stage, their fingers hovering over a dusty piano as they glanced around, gauging the room. They could feel the quiet hum of their mother’s magic, woven into the air like a whisper, guiding them toward their purpose tonight.
Just before leaving that morning, Agatha had leaned in, her eyes sparkling with pride and a hint of mischief. “Remember, my love,” she’d murmured, brushing a stray hair from their forehead. “Tonight, we need the song to travel—so that the right ears might hear it.”
And so, here they were, under the warm glow of candlelight, ready to sing the melody they’d written together: Witches’ Road. They knew the song by heart, every note and word crafted to call out, inviting magic-seekers toward its ancient lure. The piano keys felt cool beneath their fingers as they began to play, the haunting melody weaving through the saloon.
As their voice joined the music, soft and sure, conversations began to quiet. Heads turned, listening as the words drifted through the room.
"There's a road that's wild and wicked, winding through the wood
Where all that's wrong is right and all that's bad is good
Through many miles of tricks and trials, we wander high and low
Tame your fears, a door appears, the time has come to go…"
Their voice was filled with a subtle magic, a lure that pulled at hearts and minds, drawing listeners into the mystery of the song. Eyes watched them with fascination, some captivated, others with an uneasy curiosity. As the song reached its chorus, a few women near the back exchanged glances, leaning in closer, their interest piqued.
"Down, down, down the road
Down the witches' road
Down, down, down the road
Down the witches' road
Down, down, down the road
Down the witches' road
Follow me, my friend
To glory and the end…"
When the final note lingered, fading into the air, there was a soft hush in the room, broken only by scattered murmurs. The women from the back made their way forward, curiosity gleaming in their eyes.
One of them, a tall woman with silver-streaked hair, gave the reader a long, assessing look. “That’s a peculiar tune for someone so young,” she said, her voice low but warm. “Where’d you learn a song like that?”
The reader met her gaze with innocent wonder, tilting their head as if the question surprised them. “It’s… something I came up with myself,” they said, keeping their tone light, humble, even a bit shy. “I’ve always been drawn to magic, to the mysteries and stories of witches. But it’s hard to learn when no one is willing to teach.”
The woman raised an eyebrow, clearly intrigued, and the others exchanged whispers. “You’re… self-taught?” another asked, her eyes narrowing slightly.
They nodded. “But it’s not enough. I’ve been looking for someone who could show me the true path—a real mentor.” The reader’s voice took on a slight note of longing, one that Agatha had coached them to use, and they cast their gaze down, as though a little shy showing a subtle colored little spark from her hands.
The silver-haired woman’s expression softened as she looked at the reader, her curiosity turning to something else—a hint of sympathy, perhaps. She glanced at her companions before giving a slight nod. “Come with us,” she said, her voice gentle but firm. “If you’re serious about seeking the path, I believe we may be able to help.”
The reader smiled, a small, grateful smile, and slid down from the piano bench. They followed the woman and her companions out of the saloon and into the quiet night, their pulse quickening as they thought of Agatha, waiting in the forest.
As they walked, the reader could feel the air changing, a faint vibration in the earth beneath their feet. Magic was gathering, old and powerful, drawn by the song and by the reader’s carefully spoken words. They kept their face calm, nodding along as the women spoke in low voices about the “Witches’ Road” and its history, speculating about how such a young soul could know a song like that.
After a while, they reached a clearing, surrounded by tall trees whose branches stretched up toward the star-filled sky. The witches turned to face the reader, their expressions serious.
“We don’t usually take to strangers, especially ones as young as you,” the silver-haired woman said, her eyes narrowing thoughtfully. “But something about you is… different. There’s a power in you that feels older than your years.”
The reader met her gaze, giving a small, earnest nod. “Thank you for trusting me. I promise, I’m ready to learn.”
Just as the woman was about to reply, a soft rustling sounded from the shadows, and the air grew thick with tension. One by one, the women turned, sensing the shift in the atmosphere. The shadows deepened, twisting and stretching as if alive, and from the darkness, Agatha emerged, her silhouette outlined against the moonlight, her eyes gleaming with a fierce intelligence.
The witches took a step back, their expressions shifting from curiosity to alarm.
“You’re… you’re her mother?” one of them whispered, looking at Agatha with dawning recognition.
Agatha smiled, a calm, knowing smile, and nodded. “Indeed. And you were kind enough to keep my little one company tonight.” Her voice was smooth, filled with a dark charm that held them in place, even as they sensed the danger.
The silver-haired woman’s expression hardened, realizing the trap too late. “This was a setup,” she hissed, her voice low with anger.
Agatha tilted her head, her gaze unyielding. “I never said it wasn’t.”
Without another word, she raised her hand, and a dark mist coiled around her fingers, crackling with a subtle, sinister power. The witches tried to resist, casting protective spells and trying to break free, but Agatha’s magic was stronger—each spell they cast was met with a swift, effortless counter. She moved gracefully, almost as though she were dancing, drawing power from them, siphoning their magic as they struggled.
The reader watched, both awed and unnerved. They knew what their mother was capable of, but witnessing her in action, surrounded by these powerful witches who had no chance against her, was something different entirely.
As the last of the coven fell to the ground, drained and silent, Agatha turned to them, her eyes softening as she approached. She brushed a strand of hair from their face, her expression filled with warmth and pride.
“You did perfectly, my love,” she murmured, her voice a gentle contrast to the fierce power they had just witnessed. “Just as I knew you would.”
They looked up at her, a small, relieved smile breaking through. “It worked,” they whispered, the weight of the night’s events settling over them. “They really believed I needed their help.”
Agatha smiled, pride shining in her eyes. “That’s because you have the heart of a true witch—clever, resourceful, and far stronger than most would ever guess. You’re learning fast.”
But even as her words brought comfort, a pang of guilt stirred in the reader’s heart. “Mama… I didn’t know it would feel like this.” They looked at the fallen witches, an uncertain shadow crossing their face. “What if they… what if they didn’t deserve it?”
Agatha knelt down, her expression softening as she took their hands in hers. “Listen to me, my love. Those who would harm us, or stand in the way of what we need, they give us no choice. This is the path we walk, and it’s a path not everyone can understand.”
The reader nodded, letting her words sink in, though the weight still lingered.
Seeing their unease, Agatha cupped their cheek, a tender smile playing on her lips. “You have a compassionate heart, my dear one, and that is a gift. But there are times we must be strong and unyielding to protect what’s ours.” She stroked their cheek. “Trust in your strength, and trust that you were right to call them to us. You did nothing wrong.”
With Agatha’s reassurances, the reader felt a calm settle over them, a reminder of their purpose and the bond they shared with her. They walked together back through the forest, the night quiet around them, the stars gleaming overhead. As they walked, Agatha began to hum the familiar melody, and the reader joined her, their voices mingling softly as they sang together.
"There's a road that's wild and wicked, winding through the wood..."
Their voices blended, filling the night air with the haunting, beautiful song, a mother and child bound by love, secrets, and a strength that would see them through any trial ahead.
===============================
A/n: Comment?,👀😩🖐🏻, I'm bored and lacking motivation for this
#agatha all along#agatha all along x reader#agatha harkness#bridget hearts x reader#agatha coven of chaos#agatha harkness x reader#agathario#rio vidal x reader#agatha x rio#rio vidal#witches road#marvel
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KISS ME,KISS ME,KISS ME LOVE ME
*pairing: nerd Heeseung x reader
*tags: fluffy,kiss,smut, jealousy
*synopsis: Heeseung didn't mind you because he was busy playing video games like any nerd so you could only do one thing "tease him"
*word count: 2k (Tell me if you like this kind of stories:)
—REBLOG if you enjoyed
© cutehoons02 all rights reserved 2024.
(English is not my native language)
Heeseung had two personalities and lived completely two lives.
The first was the idol he became super confident on stage with his harmonic voice that made crazy thousands of her fans during the various tours of Enhypen, he loved to flirt with her fans during meet and greet, and as he danced on stage he transformed and loved to emanate that super sexy aura but extremely illegal aura for most of his fans but at the same time, he was a little nerd who loved spending hours playing video games with his friends, Lego building and watching old movies with a nice plate of ramen, especially during the autumn evenings where at five in the afternoon it was already dark in Seoul.
Y/n and Heeseung had not yet formalized their relationship with the other members but every hour or day when Heeseung had time to spend alone he invited her into his dormitory, especially in his room, or they spent those hours walking in places not too crowded of the Korean capital or they played basketball in one of the many parks that were near their apartments; Y/n wasn’t very good at playing basketball but her competitive side always came out because Hee loved to tease people especially that girl who was now part of her heart.
The blue light of the computer illuminated the faces of Heeseung and Y/n, Hee was playing a game that he had given the girl next to him and she had taken note of not giving him more video games because it was almost two hours that he moved his hands in the controller sexy way and at the same time he passed his hands in the hair when he lost a life in the game for exploitation.
Y/n loved those hands especially when they were attached to her hips, when Hee would arrange a strand of her long hair behind her ear, or when the boy with the eyes of a deer made her come countless times in an evening between his fingers.
"Hee, I understand that you love this game but you’re not a nerd who has to spend the whole evening in front of this computer if you haven’t noticed I’ve been next to you for almost two hours and I’m seriously bored, it’s better to see you beat me at basketball at least I know I have your attention!"
a small grin formed between Heeseung’s lips and he felt one of his big hands hold your thigh "Stop behaving like a child and if you have so much need of my attention sit between my legs, within 10 minutes the game ends and I’ll be all yours!" You wanted to seriously sit between her legs and put your head between her neck and smell that delicious mix of hot spices and the scent of laundry that emanated from her skin but she was seriously tired of not being looked after by her "boyfriend"
"Don't worry i let you play, i go to prepare a shield of ramen in the kitchen who knows maybe there will find someone who appreciates my company!" You felt a small laugh come out of Heeseung’s lips and a slight puff went out of your lips. In the kitchen, there was strange silence but immediately after you heard the laughter that you could recognize immediately from the common room that they had the guys, one was that of Jay, and the other of your bias, nobody knew except Heeseung that "ICE PRINCE" was your bias and when he discovered it a slight jealousy took over in Heeseung’s body.
"look who we have here worthy of his presence" A small smile came out from your lips when you felt Jay make fun of you.
<<How come you’re all alone? your boyfriend doesn’t give you the right attention or is still playing video games...>> You loved Sunghoon but sometimes he behaved as if you and Heeseung were not engaged and it was also true because he had not yet asked you to be his girlfriend.
"Don’t worry Hee gives me a lot of attention i came of my own free will to prepare ramen, you want some too, and stop me and Heeseung are not engaged?" you had just stopped in the kitchen to warm up your ramen and Sunghoon oddly came out slightly talkative towards you.
<<If you don’t get your girlfriend back that guy has problems because you do exactly a "cute couple" watch movies together, go to the games rooms together, wear his sweaters as at this moment, and for my bad luck, i have the room next to that of Heeseung and hear your groans, especially your Y/n>> A slight redness made its way into your cheeks and at that moment you just wanted to have the power to disappear because Heeseung had told you that the rooms were soundproof because people like Jay could play guitar in the room.
Heeseung was not at all jealous of his teammates he knew that he could trust all 6 but since he had discovered that your bias was not him Sunghoon had become extremely towards you. As you could have Hoon as bias and stay with him, they had two different characters and even beauty were opposite; Sunghoon was introverted, Sunghoon’s look was enough to stop a possible argument between the members and he was cold enough with the girls instead he liked touching you (maybe too much) wanted to always have physical contact with you, He easily made friends with everyone and loved to flirt with girls. So when he heard Hoon talk to you like that he ran to your side and kissed you in front of the two members of the enhypen, it was not a shy kiss that gave you just awake or when he greeted you to go to work but immediately crashed his lips in yours and made you open your mouth more to get into your tongue and heard a small moan coming from you and this made him proud of himself same.
It was he who made you groan and loved to hear his name come from your lips, it was he who had the luxury of being able to kiss you,he was the only one able to show you the stars while he was inside of him and it was just him that you wanted as a boyfriend and maybe it was time to seriously arrange an appointment but now he just wanted to take you out of the kitchen and be with you in his room.
"The ramen is ready, if you want a little get up to take it, me and Y/ n go to the room" A slight redness was seen in Heeseung’s cheeks but he was drowning in jealousy and also a bit of anger.
<<I recommend you have fun i’ll stay in the living room with Jay and do not make me become an uncle at 22 years old that there are still people like Ni-Ki who for me are still a child to care!>>. Jay and Sunghoon gave each other a high five, they couldn’t understand why their older member hadn’t asked you after almost 6 months of being in a relationship to be his girlfriend and they loved seeing him jealous.
You took Heeseung to his room and sat him in the giant gamer chair that he had in the room and a look full of questions formed in his face from the eyes of deer.
"how come you have reactivated the video games i want to be with you Y/n" A smile came out of your lips and before sitting between her knees I took a beautiful pink lipstick that you loved to wear and that stood out from your white skin and your green eyes.
Now you say that you want to be with me after being next to you for 2 hours and having heard from Sunghoon that he hears me moaning, and that I've been with you for almost 6 months and you haven’t had the balls to ask me to be your girlfriend." you sat between his legs and immediately his big hands will go to touch your waist to get closer to him but you with a small slap remove the feet from Heeseung
"Now play your stupid game as long as i want, and don’t try to touch me or i won’t make you come you can’t touch me for days and we know that when you see me you look like a little puppy who needs attention, especially my touch." Heeseung looked at you with a drool in his mouth, it was rare to see you blubbering and this thing made him even more excited.
You put on your favorite lipstick and you took his face with one hand as you had seen on Tik Tok there was this trend where you kissed your boyfriend with everything but the tongue and you had to see how long it lasted without kissing you.
You kissed Heeseung in his neck socket, in his adam’s apple and now you were trying to give him a kiss in the mole that had in front, and without fear, you pulled up and felt its length become harder and harder between your legs and felt a slight moan come out from his lips.
"What’s your game, Y/n, you want to make me cum in my pants without even touching you? What is this thing that you kiss me for everything and not on my lips." another moan came out of his lips and a hand went in his hair to make him mess a little, you loved to see that gesture because he always did it when he was agitated and as a bitch as you were you rubbed between his pants and felt the controller fall on the ground.
"How come you don’t want to play video games anymore, Hee? Before I left you couldn’t take your eyes off the computer and now you can’t take my eyes off my body" you came to give them a big kiss and he was beautiful, his hair was slightly messy and locks were falling out of his eyes that he tried in every way to take up, His face and neck were covered with pink kisses, and his cheeks were red from the things you said to him and all those kisses you left for him.
"Kiss me, kiss me, kiss me love me, and not that nerd asshole who left you to bore yourself and suffer the teasing of Jay but especially Hoon."
A light laugh came out of your lips and you couldn’t believe that in that state Heeseung had sung the part of an enhypen song to tell you to kiss him and love him "You didn’t seriously sing a part of "Daydream" to have my lips between yours true?" "Sometimes being Idol has its advantages and I could not think of it asking you to kiss me using one of my songs, seriously y/n you’re driving me crazy I need to kiss you right now" Without thinking for a moment you put your lips in her and a light moan came out of your lips, a hand of Heeseung leaned on one side of you and the other went under his sweatshirt to touch your belly and then to tease your breast. Your breasts were perfect for her hands and after a few seconds you took off the sweatshirt and mouth that you longed so much sucked a hood "Hee, tell me it’s not true that Sunghoon can hear us" You moved your hips where there was his length and to make you suffer began to morph softly your breast and pulled slightly her hair "maybe i told you a lie, love to hear you moan especially my name and must understand that you are mine" His bites became more intense and this asshole nerd with deer eyes made you come in your underwear and a slight stain formed in the pants of his suit.
"I hate you," Lee Heeseung
"I love you, y/n"
#lee heesung x reader#lee heeseung#heeseung enhypen#heeseung imagines#heeseung x reader#enhypen fluff#enhypen smut#enhypen fanfic#sunghoon x reader
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Breaking Character
─────── · · A Smosh Fanfic
Pairing: Gentleman!Boyfriend!Spencer Agnew x gn!Partner!Reader
─ · · SUMMARY: You try your hardest to beat Gentleman Spencer at his own game of saying increasingly outlandish comments while trying to get him to break character!
─ · · TAGS: gender-neutral pronouns, part social-media au, established relationship, fluff, suggestive themes, attempt at humour.
─ · · MASTERLIST | TAGLIST REQUEST | WORDCOUNT: 1,736
─ · · A/N: Asks are closed for a little while but that you to this amazing ask was from an anon! 🫶
─────── · ·
"Hello all you lovely watchers behind the screen, now I would usually save such corse words for the bedroom but you all appear lucky at the games table tonight," you cast a smile and wink towards the camera. Adjusting your wig before taking a drag out of your long fake cigarette. Your goal today was to get your boyfriend, Spencer, to break Character today in a video.
"As you can see, I am joined by a handful of my friends, especially this special friend beside me, remind me of your name again, dear?" you ask with a slight tilt to your head as you eye Spencer form his top hat down to his suspenders.
Spencer tries to hold your look before breaking under your stare, instead turning his back to you and turning fully towards the camera. "Good-day to you all, I am a gentleman here to play quite the crass game. Monopoly: Cheaters Addition, now I believe my wife would have something to say about this, but I wouldn't remember the names of any of them!"
"Ah'll tell ya what, mister, you're staring to sound like my fifth husband, couldn't remember my name while spending quality time with me inside the room nor outside. Now that I think about it, I can't seem to remember his name... maybe I should start to remember yours, m'sure a man like you would like that~" you tease yet keep to your chair observing as Spencer rolls his shoulders and turns to face you head on in character. By the wild look in his eyes, you can tell you are getting to him and by the end of this, you would be sure to hold him in the palm of your hand (in character of course!).
Disregarding your later statement, Gentleman Spencer clears his throat before replying, "And what type of man is your fifth husband, dashing and a rich-lad I would presume for something as gorgeous as you?"
You giggle to his words, hand reaching over the table to pick your piece, "Well, how am I s'possed to know? I'm only on my fourth but I'm sure he'll be out of the picture soon. I like to think I ran him dry in more ways than one-" Spencer begins coughing again before leaning down to erupt in laughter as does the rest of the cast and crew.
"Well, If yee two are done fucking around, It is time to introduce I- Thee masterful wizard thee-self, me" Shayne introduces his character, pointed a crocked finger and eye between the two of you. You shrug, taking a drag of your cigarette.
"Do tell me dear when it is my turn next, you see games of strategy are not for people like me- right?" you coyly state to Spencer who nods his head, still not ready to go back in character as you can see him taking in deep breathes to keep himself form falling into another pit of laughter and all you can do is smile, wiggling your eyebrows for all of that to go to hell.
"And it appears that the most intelligent always wait to go last. Names Tinky-Winky and I'm here to win. Should be easy with the table we have here tough-" Amanda tries to get the game moving before you put in one last jab.
"I wouldn't be to sure about that, what did you say, Rinky-Pinky?-?
"Tinky-Winky," Amanda clarifies with an eye-roll that you match with more exaggeration "Yes, tink-wink, whatever you're called just know that I will enjoy watching you all lose."
"Whatever you say, mobster," Amanda quips before quickly going over the rules as you place your head in your hands, blowing the hair out of your face.
─────── · ·
As the game progressed into the early stages, whatever civilized conversation you all tried to ensure at the start of the game was out the window, now full-blow yelling and screaming at one another as even the staff backed away, watching as the chaos exploded through the room and you all reverted fully into character.
"HEY! You just cheated!" Tinky-Winky Amanda screamed out to you, pointing their purple-gloved mitt in your face.
"Cheated?" You faked innocence, batting your eyelashes while speaking in a high pitched tone, "I would never cheat, thats something I save for me and my husbands!" you retort, now also standing up from your seat, hands gripping the table as you lena forwards to exaggerate your point before Spencer is pulling you back down to the table.
"Now I just don't like anyone putting their hands on my without me sayin' nothin' but I do like the feel of your hands, keep me grounded would ya? I'm forgetting my manners here with this lad," you mumble to the Gentleman beside you as he blushed bright red before starting to pull his hand away, coughing and choking on a reply only for you to hold in hand in position on your arm with a wink before returning your stolen money back to the bank and starting the new round.
"Penguin man! You seem a strange and pathetic fellow..." you off-handedly comment towards Spencer as Amanda takes her turn.
"Well yes, it comes from-" Spencer begins to speak before you continue your sentence.
"...I like that in a man," your voice drops to a sultry tone, head leaning against his arm enjoying the way Spencer sputters into nervous laughter and grips your hand.
─────── · ·
You noticed just how close Spencer had come multiple times during the filming but he had yet to call for a break, you were so sure of it at the start but had yet to get back to that point besides a few blushes and loaded looks your way but you stayed determined nevertheless.
Taking a long drag from your cigarette, you imagined it casting a hard cloud around and past Spencer head as you watched him take his turn, awaiting yours next. "Remember to win," you quiped with a sarcastic tone.
"I'll keep that in mind, dear. Now do be one and let this man concentrate," he replied with a playful glare in your direction before getting a snake-eyes that would nearly bankrupt the gentleman when landing on the dumpster wizards Shayne's hotel. "Fuck!" Spencer swore, tossing his top hat behind himself in outrage.
"I think the man needs to concentrate even more, I could help you~" you tease, picking up the top hat and placing it gently back on his head. Spencer only shakes his head once the hat is firmly back on. "I'm sure my mistresses are better-suited for such works, whatever would your husband think?"
"So outrageous of you to think my husband would do the thinking..." you mumble before picking up the dice in your hand and extending your palm with them towards Spencer. "Blow on these here die would ya, doll?" you ask as Shayne yells over the table, currently in a headlock from Tinky-Winky. "I thought it was custom to get the working women to blow your dice!?"
"Well he might be no dame but you're a dime in my eyes doll," you throw back without missing a beat.
"Ah-well. I may have a dime in my money bin! They make for a leisurely swim-" the Gentlemen comes into conversation as you are quick again to come to a response, "Would ya take me for a dip sometime then? I would love to see what else ya bring to the table?"
Spencer blinks, not wanting to look you into the eyes just yet and talks towards Amanda, "You know, I really can't say for certain, but do you think it's possible they're in it for the money and not my shining personality or physical connection?
And you do not allow time for Amanda to get a word in, knowing that now more than ever will get Spencer to crack his character, "It's not the money that I have my eyes on, sugar. I heard a little something about aerodynamics and clothes that I'm looking to test, and that test seems definitely responsive..." you end with a smirk watching as Spencer stands and turns around to face the wall.
"OKAY! OKAY!" Spencer admits to defeat as you stand up and cheer, running to hug him from behind as you both sway back and forth. "I made you loose character~" you sing-song.
"Yeah, yeah you did. Good job, lovely," Spencer groans before you both are told to re-take your seats and finish the game properly. To everyone surprise the Dumpster Wizard Shayne somehow ended up winning by pulling a Angela and stealing all the money as you were celebrating your boyfriends defeat in good fun.
"There is no way you could have won, I demand a recount!" you announce, throwing all your bills to the table. "And here I thought you weren't in it for the money," Spencer teases back. "Shut up, its only an added bonus," you snakily reply only to ultimately accept your defeat.
"Well, thank you all for sitting through this shit-show. We hope you join us again-" you begin to outro. "But not again for this exactly," Spencer cuts you off and clarify as the video fades to black by the sound of all your combined laughter flooding the studio once again.
─────── · ·
🔔 Smosh Games just posted! watch now?
─────── · ·
Gentleman's Rules: Cheaters Monopoly!
Smosh Games ✓ [Subscribed] 👍 32k | 👎 7.78M subscribers 109k views 5 days ago only the politest of games... click to read more
998 Comments
username01 Spencer really out here acting all hot and flustered- simply adorable!
username43 The group of characters I never knew I needed, all we were missing was Chosen!Trevor and Angela to really round out the chaos of this episode!
username88 So in love with this Monopoly: Cheaters Edition- I never want it to end!!
username21 so... gentlemen's Just Dance when?
↳ username46 OMG YESSS, THIS HAS TO BE MADE A THING!!
username03 i love how determined (name) was to get Spencer to break character and how good he took it!
username94 really love how (name) was the one to make all of Spencers outrageous comments appear like the normal ones in comparison to theirs.
username77 Wait so i'm confused, im a new smosh fan and are these actors acting like they're dating or are they already together????
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─ · · SPENCER AGNEW TAGLIST: @lisiliely @missflufffanfics @little-stitious-studios @thejourneyneverendsx @sibsteria @lizzylynch1 @babble2 @delaneyburghardt @thevintagefangirl @uniquely-haunting @maricarorp @sarahskywalker-amidala
#fanfic#fanfiction#simp-ly#simp-ly-writes#x reader#ask#fluff#ask asnwered#answered#spencer agnew fanfiction#spencer agnew imagine#spencer x reader#spencer agnew#spencer agnew x reader#smosh imagine#smosh games#smosh fanfic#smosh fanfiction#smosh#smosh x reader
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It's A Man's World Chapter 4 (Drip)
a/n: I rewrote this chapter 2 or 3 times. I personally think it's not my best, but I hope you like it let me know in my ask ;)
Daft Day
Here we are, the anticipation of Draft Day hanging thick in the air. Don’t even think about asking me what happened after the party or the following day—I honestly can’t remember. I really should add "Don’t Party with the Bengals" to my ever-growing list of things to avoid.
A knock pulls me out of my thoughts “Hey Sierra, you ready? Kyle is here!” Joe’s voice calls out from the other side of the bathroom door, breaking my moment of reflection.
I do one last check in the mirror, smoothing down my hair and adjusting my outfit before reluctantly opening the door. “Yeah, I’m ready,” I reply, a hint of excitement mixed with nerves in my tone.
“What do you think?” I asked as I stepped out of the bathroom. I do a little spin to show off my ensemble. I had chosen not to wear a dress, instead opting for a tailored black blazer adorned with elegant gold decorations cascading down the shoulders. Paired with a sleek, short skirt featuring matching gold accents that gave a hint of sparkle, I feel chic and ready for the moment. To complete the look, I slipped on a pair of black heels that added just the right amount of height.
He looks at me from his spot on the couch “You look stunning just missing one thing” he says as he gets up and approaches me. He reaches up and takes the of his chain off his neck “Turn around” he tells me.
This boy here is doing things to my soul and he just doesn't even know it. Doing as he says I turn around and he puts his chain on me. He turns me back around “Now you dripping in gold”
Shaking my head unable to find words I grab my clutch as he moves away and opens the door “Come on Ja’marr and Mia are waiting on us.”
When we arrived at the arena. One of the crew members led us to a section where Mia and Ja’marr were waiting for us.
We exchange warm hugs and enthusiastic hellos, settling in comfortably on the plush couch. As I take a moment to look around the room, I can't help but notice the sea of nervous excitement among the crowd of players, all waiting for their futures to unfold during the draft. Suddenly, a rush of nerves hits me, and I start shaking my leg unconsciously, trying to calm my racing thoughts.
In my fidgeting, I unintentionally nudge Mia, who looks over at me with concern. “Hey, you okay?” she asks, her brow slightly furrowed.
I nod and glance at her, taking a deep breath. “Yeah, just a bit nervous,” I admit, trying to shake off the anxiety.
She grabs my hand “Just breathe you probably have all 32 teams gunning for you” she reassures me “Any team you're specifically looking for?” Ja’marr questioned. I shake my head “Not really although I would love to go back home and play for the Cardinals don't think I'd grow too much there” I respond with a shrug.
‘Hey maybe the Reds will draft her that way she can't leave Cincinnati” Joe pipes in with a laugh.
I looked back at him “Naw me cold weather don't get along”
“Girl no weather and you get along” Mia interjects we all laugh because she is right Winter, Spring, Summer, and Fall if I wasn't playing baseball you have to catch me in the comforts of my bed.
As we continue to share laughs and stories, the lights suddenly dim, and a dynamic video package begins to play on the large screen, showcasing the highs of previous seasons and the promise of new talent.
The energy in the room surges as the hype package concludes, and the spotlight shifts to the stage. The commissioner of the MLB, Rob Manfred, strides confidently onto the platform, radiating authority and excitement.
“Hello and welcome to the 2021 MLB Draft!” he announces, his voice echoing throughout the arena. “Tonight, we usher in a new era of baseball. You all have worked tirelessly for this moment, and now it’s time to see your dreams become reality. Let’s get started, shall we?” Rob declares from the podium, setting the stage for an unforgettable night.
The first round has concluded, and the results are in—nothing for me.
As the second round begins, the atmosphere remains tense, and yet, I cling to the flicker of hope that perhaps my name will be called.
When the third round rolls around, I hear another name—a person named Riley is chosen. My heart sinks as I realize I’m still overlooked.
Now, as the fourth round draws closer, a wave of anxiety washes over me. I navigate through the crowd, feeling the pulse of anticipation in the air. I approach the bar, the gleaming surface reflecting my apprehension, and the bartender looks up, asking, “What can I get you?”
“Whiskey, straight, please. Thank you,” I respond, my voice steady yet laced with underlying nerves.
She nods, her movements fluid as she prepares my drink. “Coming right up,” she says, and moments later, she slides the glass toward me.
I inhale deeply, trying to release some of the built-up tension. “Thank you,” I say, accepting the drink from her with a slight, grateful smile.
As I take a generous sip, the smooth warmth of the whiskey hits my stomach, providing a momentary reprieve from my anxious thoughts. Just then, I have the unsettling sensation that someone is watching me intently. Turning my head to the right, I lock eyes with a man making his way over, and his approach feels predatory as if I’m the target in his sights.
“I hope I'm not intruding,” he begins, leaning against the bar with a casual confidence, “but I must say, you look absolutely stunning tonight.” His tone is suave, designed to charm.
I muster a polite smile, aware that I want to deflect this interaction as quickly as possible. “Thank you,” I say, deliberately avoiding his gaze, trying to focus on anything but him.
“My name’s Chris,” he introduces himself, extending his hand toward me with an expectant grin. I glance at his hand, assessing the situation, before shaking my head gently. “Sorry, Chris, but I’m really not interested,” I reply softly, retreating into my glass as I seek refuge in my drink.
He draws back his hand and smirks playfully at me, his confidence evident. “Playing hard to get, I see,” he teases, leaning slightly closer.
I shake my head firmly, dismissing him. “Nope, just not looking for any extra company,” I reply, keeping my tone plain and simple as I mentally strategize my exit from this awkward interaction.
“You sure? You just seem tense,” he probes, inching even closer for comfort.
Before I can formulate a response, I suddenly feel a reassuring hand pressed against the middle of my back. A familiar voice cuts through the noise. “Wonder where you drifted off to. You okay?” Joe asks, his concern palpable.
I turn my head to face him, grateful for his interruption. “Yeah, I’m good. I just needed something to calm my nerves,” I respond, a sense of relief washing over me as his presence provides a buffer.
Joe nods, his expression softening. He motions with his head toward our group. “Come on,” he says, gently leading the way while keeping his hand on my back—a gesture that provides unexpected comfort. As we return to our section and settle into the couch, I lean closer to Joe and whisper, “Thank you.”
Joe takes a seat beside me, casually draping his arm behind me on the back of the couch. His protective stance envelops me in a sense of security.
“Not a problem,” he replies, though there’s a slight edge to his voice that piques my curiosity.
Was he feeling jealous?
I don’t have much time to ponder this question, as the lights in the venue dim once again, signaling the beginning of the fourth round of the MLB Draft. The anticipation in the air is almost electric.
Rob makes his way back to the podium, confidence radiating from him. “Alright, with the first pick of the fourth round of the 2021 MLB Draft, the Atlanta Braves select…” He glances down at his card, and a broad smile spreads across his face, crafting suspense in the room.
“Sierra Riley, shortstop out of LSU!”
The moment his words register, my heart races. I can hardly believe my ears. Suddenly, everyone around me is on their feet, applauding and cheering, and I feel like I’m floating. Someone pinch me, please—I must be dreaming!
As I stand up, I look at Mia, my heart pounding with disbelief, and mouth the words, “What the hell?” She chuckles, sharing in my incredulity. Joe steps aside, allowing me a clear path to the stage. As I stroll past him, he encourages me with a smile, saying, “Get ’em, superstar!”
I can’t help but grin back at him as I make my way to the stage, ascending the steps with a mixture of excitement and nerves. At the top, I’m greeted by Justin Bell, the manager of the Atlanta Braves, who stands ready with a baseball jersey and a Braves cap.
With a beaming smile, I approach him and wrap my arms around him in a brief hug. “Thank you so much!” I exclaim, my voice filled with genuine appreciation.
He pulls back slightly, maintaining eye contact as he responds, “You’re very welcome, Sierra.” Justin then carefully places the baseball cap on my head, his hands steady as he unfolds the jersey to reveal my last name and number, now emblazoned on a Braves jersey.
At that moment, words escape me entirely, and I shake my head in disbelief, overwhelmed by the reality of it all. Just then, I feel another hand on my shoulder. I turn to see the commissioner standing beside me, a warm smile on his face. “Congrats, Sierra,” he says, genuine joy in his voice.
“Thank you,” I manage to say, still absorbing the significance of this incredible moment. The commissioner's voice breaks through the fog of excitement as he gestures toward the cameras, encouraging me to pose with the jersey. I reflexively smile, showcasing my pride.
As I scan the room, my eyes land on Joe, whose face is illuminated by a broad smile. I see Mia, her eyes glistening with tears of joy, and Ja’marr cheering enthusiastically, like he’s at a football game.
In that instant, it hits me: all the hard work, the sacrifices, and the endless dedication truly do pay off.
As I made my way backstage, the atmosphere buzzed with excitement. One of the reporters from ESPN, eager and enthusiastic, pulled me aside for an interview.
"Sierra Riley, congratulations! You've just made history as the first woman ever to be drafted in Major League Baseball. Can you describe how you’re feeling at this moment?" she inquired, her eyes gleaming with curiosity.
I couldn't help but smile widely. "Thank you so much! Honestly, I feel incredibly blessed right now," I said, taking a moment to gather my thoughts. "It’s overwhelming, and part of me feels like my brain hasn’t fully processed everything yet,” I laughed lightly, shaking my head in disbelief. “But overall, I feel fantastic!"
The reporter leaned in for his next question, clearly intrigued. "What should Atlanta Braves fans expect from you moving forward?"
With confidence, I responded, "I hope they can expect all great things! I want them to know that I don’t take any of this for granted. This moment is huge for me, but it’s just the beginning of my story. I’m ready to work hard and make my mark!"
She nodded in appreciation, her face reflecting genuine excitement. "Thank you once again, and congratulations on this incredible achievement!” she exclaimed brightly before walking away, leaving me buzzing with a mix of joy and anticipation for what lay ahead.
Atlanta here I come.
Chapter 4...Batter Up...
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mcr at project revolution in charlotte, nc. august 8 2007. photos by buttertooth on livejournal. picture commentary under the cut
pic 2:
When MCR first came out onstage, Gerard strutted on like he was all badass with a black bandana on his face. For some reason, he reminded me of an anime cartoon character when he was wearing that. Anyway, the decision to wear the bandana came back to bite him in the ass later because he couldn't get it to untie from his neck when he realized how ridiculously fucking hot it was out there. I didn't realize it was still around his neck but he made a comment about it between songs when he was trying to catch his breath. Haha. Oh well, everything can't always go perfectly, right?
Anyway, since the picture of him (that I tried to take) with the bandana turned out all blurry and awful, here is a picture of Gerard just after he took it off. Might I point out how foxy his hair looks. Hooray for Gerard not looking like a mad scientist when I saw them perform!
Gerard made multiple comments on the heat, but you know what? He sort of deserved being hot since he was out there in his JACKET! It's a wonder he didn't pass out. He did spend a lot of the time lying on the stage or sitting. Early in their set (maybe three or so songs in?) he said something to the effect of (this is NOT a direct quote, just a paraphrase) "I was going to say something later about guys taking their shirts off, but, fuck it, it's too hot. Go ahead and take them off now." Then when they got to "Prison" he said it again about just the guys taking off their shirts and that he didn't care what size you are, you're still attractive. Gotta love Gerard and how he tries to make the fans feel good about themselves. I think he was just trying to charm the guys out of their clothes, though, really. He stressed that only the guys should take their shirts off and swing them around their heads. I think some guy threw his shirt up there and he picked it up and swung it around, but it could've been a rag or something. It was a black cloth of some kind, anyway. And of course, someone threw the obligatory feather boa up there, and Gerard put it on. I swear, Gerard must be crazy because he's in a jacket, singing his lungs out, on a stage with PYRO in the 103-degree heat for fuck's sake and he puts one of those itchy feather boas on.
pic 3 & 4: Unfortunately, these were the only two pics that had Ray in them since he stayed wayyyyy over on his side and I couldn't see him. But his playing and singing was amazing as usual!
pic 5: Right before the pyro came on Gerard said "Shit!" which I took to mean that he knew it was about to happen and he didn't want to feel the heat. I could be wrong, but that's what it seemed like.
pic 6: Towards the end of the concert Gerard said (again just a paraphrase because i didn't get it all, unfortunately!) that he was sweaty and nasty and everyone should "make some noise" because of it. I love MCR and all of the band members, genuinely I do, but if Gerard didn't take a shower after that concert, he is officially a nasty motherfucker. :P
Frank was a little more sensible with his attire, since he was wearing a sleeveless shirt. He flopped down at one point and it just looked like he was hating the heat.
On the second song (which I managed to get video of! Woot Woot!) Frank's guitar string broke (I think that's what inspired his fit of rage) so he smashed up his guitar. Then he picked up the one with the zombie on it and started playing again. The picture above came after he smashed up the first guitar.
pic 7: When he came down to my end of the stage, I could see that Gerard had something written on his neck again. I think it said "Truth" but it could just as well have said "Truce" because I could only see the first three letters. I don't know why it would say "Truce," but it could've (ETA: I read a review somewhere that it did indeed say "Truth". Stil havent seen any pics of it though). I tried to get a picture of his neck, but it came out blurry. Boo! Hiss! If anyone else has proof of what it said, I'd love to see the photo.
pic 8-10: And for those of you out there wondering, there was some mild Frank/Gerard action going on. By the time it happened, I had already used up all my video space and could only take photos. But the good news is that my camera has a photo burst option which lets you take three photos in a row. They're not the best photos ever, but I did get the shots when Frank walked past Gerard and grabbed Gerard's crotch. And I got Gerard's reaction to it. It happened really quickly so it was easy to miss.
pic 11: Oh and about halfway through, Frank put either a shirt over his head (one of the one's that got thrown onstage when Gerard told the guys in the audience to take their shirts off), presumably to mop up the sweat, but maybe he just wanted to be a weirdo. In the first photo it looks like Frank is smelling his armpits but really he's trying to wrap the cloth around his head.
pic 12-14: He played with the cloth over his head for most of the song.
pic 15: Gerard singing and Bob drumming away…
pic 16: Just Gerard…
pic 17-18: Frank taking a sip of water in the dark… …then spitting it on the audience. It didn't land on me. Not to sound horridly grungy or anything, but I kinda wished the water would've landed on me because I would've welcomed anything that would help cool me off at that point.
pic 19: Frank and Matt in the same stance. And yes, Matt, Frank does have a nice ass.
pic 20: Gerard pointing….
pic 21: And now for a little Matt Cortez: Gerard said he's got "arms of steel" and he ain't lyin'…
pic 22: Matt Cortez, being awesome. Gerard even gave a shout out to him and walked by and ruffled his hair…
pic 24: Matt's back…
pic 25: Matt's so cool, you can see through him!
#my chemical romance#mcr#my chem#the black parade#gerard way#frank iero#ray toro#project revolution#black parade era#my stuff
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Jack is a lot of things but tbh I don’t really get why people call him a stalker and I do take issue with insinuating he was abusive to Lacie in their relationship (when she was alive that is. His behavior towards her daughters, her best friend/doll and all the things she loved post her demise was extremely awful)
Jack’s behaviour towards Lacie is never normal or healthy and is definitely creepy. But I don’t see how he’s abusive or a stalker. If anything id say one of the issues in their relationship was Jack was too much of a pushover who had such little respect for himself that he never had the will to truly fight for a bond that they both cherished because he just couldn’t see anything beyond. I can’t help but feel like labeling him as abusive in this stage of their relationship a bit cruel towards him and unsympathetic. And I love Lacie to the moon and back but I’ll be honest I do think she was abusive to Jack in this relationship. (I am in no way trying to demonize her for this that’s my babygirl and she’s been through a lot. But I think Jack’s feelings also matter here)
I don't think we talk a lot about how Lacie sexually assaulted Jack (COCSA) in their first interaction with one another. And then later goes onto encourage him to do sex work. And Jack listens.She purposely choose to talk to him as he was someone in a vulnerable position. (Homeless and abused) so that she could play with him. She gives him her earing and tells him to come and find her Do I think Lacie was serious when she was saying this? No. I don't think Lacie genuinely made plans to see Jack again. She was just simply fouling around. This encounter meant very different things for both of them. And for Jack it flipped his whole world on his head. He was shown love for the first time in his life and was encouraged to chase after it by that person so he did. While the efforts he goes to get her is concerning I feel like calling this stalker behavior gives a much different impression and also feels a bit unempathetic to me? And is also just incorrect. Jack spends 7 years trying to find Lacie under the impression that she to wanted this shown physically with the earring. Not 7 years watching her from afar. I think it's also worth noting Jack processed Lacie's love as maternal to an extent. She did things for him a mother should do for a child (give him food, cut his hair, give him life advice and orders, protect him from bad guys, hugs) I don't wanna go super in depth bc i'd love to make a whole analysis on Jack's feelings for Lacie but Lacie even makes this comparison herself
(And once again I wanna preface with I don't think Lacie owes Jack motherhood. In fact i'm very uncomfortable with viewing motherhood in a positive lens in regards to Lacie's arc as it felt like it was always something forced upon her to further abuse and mystify her. )
And the second time. Lacie once again is the one to ask Jack to see her again. (This time however out of genuine desire.) She makes the first move and suggest this of him
I think it's fair to say Jack would probably want to try to see her again after this as an alternative response to "What are you going to do now Jack?" But I feel like it's a bit up in the air/up to interpretation. Of course I 100% think he wants to see Lacie. But he to is scared of overstepping boundaries to an extent that damages their relationship. He doesn't answer his question to her saying "I want to see you again" "I'm going to see you again" "Can I see you again" It's "I don't know." Which I think you can also take as now that Jack has completed the only life goal he's made for himself he doesn't know what to do with himself. He could be hiding his want and desires to surprise her and see her but he has no reason to do that here. Levi also giving him the paper in this scene suggests Jack lacks the knowledge to come back on his own. Point is Lacie made the first move here and asked him to come back once again she's the one pushing things.
Lacie has power over Jack. She's the on with power over him because he was vulnerable towards her. I don't mean to demonize Lacie with this post and perhaps I focused too much of her flaws in the relationship but the main point I wanna make is I do feel like people are too hard on Jack in regards to how he acted in their relationship when she was alive. Unfairly antagonizing him when he's the bigger victim in this relationship.
#sorry if this has millions of typos wrote it before going to bed#jack vessalius#lacie baskerville#pandora hearts#mochijun
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in the production of ajax that exists in my head, when athena brings ajax out of his tent in the prologue she makes odysseus go sit in the audience to see him without being seen by him
#this is bc i am currently reading ringer electra and the empty urn: metatheater and role playing in sophocles.#i love staging my little plays in my head#athena's talking about a σκηνη!!!! tent/hut AND stage building/set#dont think you can do that in english#this is probably also bc the local theater i attend most often frequently has actors use the aisles at least once per show#mine#bodycostume#<- sorta. adjacent
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I keep thinking like owwwww I miss cursed child and then I’m like girl you saw it literally two weeks ago but the truth is what I’m missing is the 2016 mystery of it all
#the scouring tumblr for information#searching through the playlists fans made of Imogen heaps music and trying to work out what might be playing in what scene#trying to visualise it all#getting my first little audio clip of it and feeling like the world had suddenly opened itself to me#really shitty boots filmed on phones that were mostly of the roof#seeing a glimpse of the top of antos head in aforementioned shitty boot and riding that high for days#seeing stage door pics and peoples recaps and show notes and just. Yearning#anyway I love cursed child and I’ve been so lucky to have been able to travel and see it so much#but there’s something so special about the time before I knew any of that#cursed child#me i guess#ccsquad
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i can not articulate with words how much i adore jack kelly.
#newsies#newsies uk#jack kelly#specifically Michaels jack#but really Just Jack#i love that little guy#my bubba :(#i have so many different versions of him in my head#between hard promises the book the movie the stage show and all the actors who have played him . there is a lot#i just think he’s genuinely such a Good character#hes been through soooo much
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last post for today, but!: 1. how is chiaki so CUTE omgomgomg <3<3 2. why does gundham do that😭😭 so in character and weird. and 3. hello fuyu + kaz hello hello hello hel
#sdr2 the stage#seeing the characters i love so much brought to life by professional actors makes me so happy :') <3#danganronpa the stage#danganronpa#sdr2#super danganronpa 2#danganronpa 2#chiaki nanami#gundham tanaka#kazuichi souda#kazuichi soda#fuyuhiko kuzuryu#CHIAKI AND GUNDHAM ARE BFFS BC I SAID SO#gundham is so WEIRD I love him#they are my silly little guys#you can see the back of nagito's head at the start lol#nearly 3am but i have to be up early tomorrow ugh😒 want to stay up and rewatch the play a million times
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played the game ok boomer at my family party today, ended up explaining to a room of ~20 of my relatives what fanfiction is so they could understand the question, “in fanfiction, what does AU stand for?”. and then the card’s definition of “AU” was wrong so i also had to get into the concept of “canon”.
can u believe. in front of my whole family. a room full of people, aged 3 to 80. all staring at me intently as i explain the difference between an alternate universe and canon divergence. at one point my mom was like “daina i think we get it” and a cousin and two aunts were like “wait no we’re interested please continue” and i had to say to my own mother in front of god and my i am kenough sweatshirt “sorry but unlike you the rest of them DON’T have to listen to me talk about fanfiction on the regular”. my uncle is a retired judge. my one cousin worked for the federal government in a job that was so classified that for years he literally couldn’t legally tell us about ANYTHING he was working on. and today those men sat and patiently listened to me define “coffee shop AU”.
also, not one, not two, but THREE of the answers for the young folks, i knew solely because they were either plot points on stranger things or they were things i found out whilst reading stranger things fanfics. and then i was the only person in our age bracket (10 people, ranging from ages 9 to 42) that knew who anne rice was, and had to explain yet again that the reason i had this knowledge was because… fanfic.
it was surreal. also my aunt, aged 68, may or may not begin attempting to read fanfic now because, according to her, “there are so many stories where there are these small side characters and i’d just KILL to hear their backstory or like what was going through their minds during the main action!” i’m very happy for her. today was wild.
#d speaks#the things i knew because of stranger things: who ripped a bats head off on stage. what year the challenger exploded. the ghostbusters theme#in case ur curious the way the game worked is there was a set of questions for people born pre 1980 and a set of questions for people born#post 1980 and you split into the two teams and you take turns reading trivia questions to each other#the questions for the young ppl were things like above - who wrote interview w a vampire#what year did the challenger explode. who are the fab four. true or false elvis had a twin.#the questions for the old people were like: what does BAE stand for. in fanfiction what’s an AU. who won the first american idol.#it was a weird game but very educational#and funny to play with my little cousins because as i said anywhere from 2-4 of them are gen alpha depending on how u define it#so it was very interesting to see what sorts of things have been passed down culturally and what sorts of things stayed solely in their time#it was sort of reminiscent of are you smarter than a fifth grader in some ways#also no one asked but. the teams were:#old team: 4 solid boomers. 3 boomer/gen x cuspers. 3 gen x’ers.#young team: 2 xennial cusps. 2 millennials. 1 zillennial cusp. 1 zoomer. 2 zalpha cusp. 2 gen alphas#and then also our 3 year old cousin who technically is gen alpha but he was more moral support than anything you understand#though at one point he DID declare that he wanted to play - picked up a card and ‘read’:#‘santa comes he eats the milk and cookies. poop goes in the potty’ in the EXACT cadence of someone asking a trivia question lmfao#love that kid. he also told me a few knock knock jokes#mainly they were like. knock knock. who’s there. candy cane. candy cane who. candy cane on your head!!!!!!!!#a true comedic genius that boy
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feeling extremely emo about the incredibly emo poetry I used to write.
#I don't remember all the stanzas#and I don't remember the exact write.. pretty wording but...#but#When we yawn- we force a tiny bit of oxygen directly to the brain- allowing us to stay awake a split second longer#With enough air- it is possible to play a note on a trumpet so loud- and so brash- that it will splatter brain matter against skull wall.#In africa- there is a tribe that drills holes in their skulls in order to talk to God- isn't it amazing what a little bit of oxygen can do#insert stanza that was almost definitely about shooting myself in the head#'She asks me what I'm thinking about- I yawn and say 'nothing''.#I think about death the way other people think about dinner menus#which is to say... on and off throughout the day- every day.#.... truly loved to get on a stage and just be The Worst.#all my poems were about mental illness- sex- or death... and tbh half the ones about sex were about mental illness#I wrote about about bi polar once that basically like- depression was a familiar boyfriend who was terrible for you... kept you home#who never wanted you to do anything. but meant that you would never be alone. and then Mania was this exciting temptrest of a woman.#'WIth her I was all lips and fingertips'#about knowing it was wrong but still being unable to stop myself from courting her- knowing I was cheating.#and then in the end- the poem ends with a bipolar diagnosis#and I just remember Sam... looking at me and being like ???? was that about bi polar the whole time.#yes Sam. Yes Sam. I wrote about making out with mental illness whatcha gonna do about it.
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yesterday i watched intruder 1989 btw funniest shit i ever seen
#oh nay#i've picked back up on my slasher watching recently a few weeks ago i watched#the final girls 2015 (cried the WHOLE time then immediately got my period) the burning 1981 (i love a friday ripoff) and stage fright#aka deliria 1987 (italian + sososo pretty)#INTRUDER THO i was so immediately charmed by the setting (stuck in a little grocery store overnight.... i love when it's cramped up#in a little space esp when it's familiar and comforting)#it felt like. it was ok but so clearly could have been better it's painful. but i enjoyed it a lot#the camerawork and framing and stuff was SOOO creative and fun#and the kills were fun fun fun fun the sfx were slay i think there might have been like 3 different fake heads that got cut in half#and the likes#i ALWAYS love that so much#was a bit slow but it was fine it had a bit of a. my bloody valentine vibe to it. the bloodbags were cute i cared them enough#the killer felt a bit..... eh......... but it was done well enough i did Not suspect a thing but also i don't even try to figure stuff out#so who knows#i have DECIDED that evil dead & child's play WILL be watched closer to halloween this year so there's that but i've gathered a huge fuckin#list of Other Stuff until then#man I WATCHED TOURIST TRAP 1979 IT WAS SO INSANE???????? IT WAS SO FUCKED UP SILLY I'M OBSESSED W IT?????#how can something feel SO MUCH like texas chainsaw but actually be SO DIFFERENT SO MUCH THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION IT WAS!!!!!!!!
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sometimes i think about 5th grade when one of the boys in my class kept stealing my pencil pouch and i had my pencil up in a threat like Dont You Try That Again & then he went and tried to steal my pencil pouch again & so i stabbed him, as promised. the pencil lead broke off in his arm lmfao. SOMEHOW i managed to not get in trouble for this.
#speculation nation#and then 3 years later i went on to date his brother lmfaoooooooooooooo#in elementary school i was a little nightmare. there was this boy in my sister's class (4 years older than me) who i loved to terrorize#id chase after him and kick him in the shins. somehow i never got in trouble for this.#i was also the type of child who would 'play bull' and just fucking run head-first into the storage doors under the gym stage#... i really took the double bull (taurus born in the year of the ox) to heart lmfao#i think that probably says something about me. probably nothing good.
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#the rd crusaders#hold your head up#charity concert#2003#russ ballard#richard desmond#greg lake#zoot money#aitch mcrobbie#sam brown#margo buchanan#steve smith#oh my goddddddddd#okay but i also love so much in these concerts the way he's so#so reserved? when he's not being the frontman#he'll just keep to his space and play his guitar and watch everything#comes forward a little when he does a solo in a song and then goes back to his space#might become a human metronome or something sometimes but otherwise doesn't do much else#but then when it's his turn#he flips the frontman switch to ON#his stage presence is beautiful
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