#i love kratom

[m00li55a]

i took like 10g of kratom tonight and it’s starting to kick in - it’ll help a lot with my anxiety right now plus 10g gets me high af feeling so i can just lay back and eat snacks and enjoy it

[prolibytherium]

The contents of this fridge haunt and enchant me

[thedisablednaturalist]

Last time I went through withdrawal I ended up in the hospital. I can't do it again. I've basically been forced to semi withdrawal every two weeks bc of how the refills are spaced. My legs get so restless I can't sleep. My brain is fuzzy and I can't think. After a couple days the vomiting and headaches start. I'm terrified. I need to work, how can I do that while being forced to go through hell. Yeah maybe I shouldn't be on constant opioids at 26, but can we at least get me off them safely? Can we pursue alternate methods? You're taking away my scuba gear and refusing to help me get back up to the surface. She told me this in one sentence: "I am referring you to the clinical pharmacy for dose optimization and tapering". The pharmacist didn't know anything about that referral. She gave me basic advice that will only work if my doctor agrees to give me more than 10 days to taper. Everyone in the reddit post I made is telling me to save my meds cause I am not getting more. Fuck she didn't even mention referring me to pain management like she's supposed to.

[emodennis]

dennis takes a mental health day - freaking out

[mezmer]

Also people showing you kindness can change your entire perspective.. once you experience somebody’s graciousness you will feel this nagging desire to do the same for others, which might inspire another person, and so on (put my story in the tags)

young me especially would have hated hearing this but networking is literally the most important thing you can do to improve your situation like forget economic barriers to education etc just keep making friends with different people and eventually someone will offer you a hand up just because they dig your vibe and that is exactly all that's happening when undeserving people surpass you anyway

[xdarkabyssx]

FINALLY ABLE TO TAKE A BREAK

(My shift ends in 45 minutes)

[kratomqueen]

I usually take low doses of kratom which is basically just caffeine if it had chiller vibes but occasionally I'll take high doses and I'm like damn this shit really do be a partial opioid

[gatorsnot]

sorry for all the inactivity bros but working two jobs atm got me like

i'll jingle my blog's bells as soon as i recharge and whoever can help me come up with an alligator or daybreak themed holiday url gets a chocolate chip muffin 😎

[wariomolly]

everyone in the kava bar is vaping elf bars and the collective tiny puffs are actually making it hazy in here

[deeppenguinstudent]

Jeremy clenched his teeth around the cork and twisted the bottle to unscrew it from the wine bottle. Kevin wrapped a langurous arm across Jean's waist and was drifting into a soundless slumber. They were enclosed in a makeshift pillow fort adorned with cloths of mismatched colors and awry stich work.

"Sleep," Jeremy heard Jean whisper to Kevin in French. Jean shifted from in between Jeremy and Kevin to retrieve a pillow, but Kevin ceased his puerile efforts and pushed his face into the crevice of Jean's neck.

"Let me use your neck, Jean," Kevin murmured, and Jeremy could almost feel the tingling sensation of his breath against his own neck, "Like how we used sleep as kids."

Jean huffed, but he wordlessly bared his neck - almost like an offering - to Kevin. Jeremy gazed at them in fascination. Just 30 minutes ago, they were at each other's throats, throwing whatever miniscule item they could find at each other. Now, they were inseparable, clinging onto one another as if their lungs would collapse from asphyxiation if they weren't within proximity.

"What, you want to use my neck too?" Jean snapped Jeremy's trance with a sharp jibe. He was glaring at Jeremy with a vitriolic expression that would have shrunk Jeremy into a puddle of defeat mere days ago. However, Jeremy couldn't miss the way Jean's gaze wavered to his exposed torso for a few seconds before flicking up to meet Jeremy's simpering smirk once again.

Jeremy stooped slightly to kiss Jean. A hand shot down his desperate venture.

"You reek of alcohol."

Jeremy blinked, dazed. He was transfixed in the way that Jean's lips pouted slightly as he chided him gently. The way his eyebrows furrowed as Jeremy continued to look at him absentmindedly. He thinks about the heated debate they shared last night; the way Jean but his lips to stampede his anger when Jeremy had professed he loved Kratom more than Chaplin.

Jeremy licked a stripe up Jean's hands that made the latter retract his hand, gobsmacked while Jeremy practically fell against Jean's neck in pure fatigue. Drinking with Kevin really wore him down to the bone.

"I want to kiss you," Jeremy blurted out.

"You're drunk, go to sleep."

Jeremy felt a protest die on his tongue as the familiar embraces of drowsiness drown his sense of being. Before he slept, however, he reached out to interlock his fingers with Kevin's and rested it on top of Jean's torso.

He knows with a sinking feel in his stomach that Jean would be lost with the nightly wind, and things would return as normal once the punishing glare of the morning Sun arrives.

[mousemilf]

hate hate hate when my posts get momentum and people expect me to conduct myself like an influencer or politician or philosopher i am a cake decorator who loves hard seltzer and small stimulant doses of kratom and you should take me exactly that seriously.

[satellitecock]

At The Firm (Tradcath)

Heretics instructing me to monitor spending, but I have a responsibility as a christian man, and that is to become the first daytrading billionaire.

As I was crushing up my piracetam tablets to put in my kratom potion this morning, I remembered just how warm and beautiful god's love truly is. My employer has no idea I'm daytrading right now, and I thank our father so much for protection from my boss.

All I want to say folks is, fuck 'em. Daytrade and sip on that disgusting green drank.

[jasper-tarot-reader]

Hi jasper!!

They/them DB again :3

I am back for another reading if that is ok :D

This time i am looking for,, advice? On where to go or maybe where to restart with my craft

Background info: i've been very on and off with all this stuff and kept jumping around without a purpose, so im wondering if there is anything to know before i "lock in" i suppose lol

Im sorry if this doesnt make much sense but i trust u :3

Welcome back to the ask box, DB! For this reading, I have blended the As Above half of the Book of Shadows Tarot by Barbara Moore with the Spirit Allies oracle deck by Jill Pyle and Cidney Bachert! Both of these decks are very Wiccan, but they're also some of the more actually-craft-focused decks I own, so we'll just have to grit our teeth. You have received the 6 of Fire reversed, the 5 of Fire upright, and 31. Kratom for this reading!

Oh this is a delightful spread, sliding down from 6 to 5. And if you do the thing that tarot recommends and add the individual numbers of 31 (3 and 1) together, you get 4, continuing the slow slide. Quite nice.

So here's what's going on with the As Above deck. The suits are all renamed to their elements and assigned a category. In this case, Fire is planets and salamanders. Broadly speaking, this suit emphasizes things like candle magic - up to anointing, carving, and everything to do with that. The 5 and 6 of Fire, then, are Jupiter and Saturn respectively. Instead of reversals, this deck technically has shadow sides, which is what Saturn is portraying.

With me so far?

The reversed Saturn indicates the building of walls and retreat. The fear of failure overwhelms the desire to succeed. This may be a case where you're scared of things not working in your practice. As annoying as it is for things to not work when you put time into them, it's very important to understand that failure is not total. In the wise words of Miss Frizzle, "If at first you don't succeed, find out why."

So, I've been getting into planetary magic recently. Been dipping my toe in and making a document of keywords and correspondences and whatnot. Somewhere among all of that research, I came across the idea that Jupiter opposes Saturn. Jupiter is benefic and auspicious, while Saturn is harsh and malefic. Saturn is when you want to bind and punish, while Jupiter is when you want to grow and gain.

Jupiter, the Great Benefactor, is "like everyone's favorite uncle - generous, fun and charming", according to Barbara Moore. And I would agree. Jupiter is associated with things like prosperity, expansion, and religion/spirituality. This could mean that getting back into the actual spiritual part of your practice, if such a thing existed previously, could help. Otherwise, magic to help you and the folks around you is also a potential point to consider as you get back into your practice or rework it.

And now, for something completely different. Mitragyna Speciosa is a tropical evergreen from southeast Asia. Its leaves, the Kratom part, has been used in herbal medicine for chronic pain, opioid withdrawal symptoms, recreational purposes, and more...although the United States Food and Drug Administration disagrees.

As a card, however, Kratom asks you this: What are you trying to avoid or ignore that you know is a problem? What are you holding onto that's just holding you back? As you handle problems, you'll generally feel better, even if the solution may sting a bit. It's gonna be uncomfortable, but discomfort is a necessary part of life, even though we all hate it. This card actually ties back in with the 6 of Fire/Saturn card, in a way.

Whew! I see why @khajiit-reads pulls multiple cards for questions, I love the amount of detail I can put into this reading, even though it takes a bit longer. It's very nice to see how all the cards interact.

Anyhow, I hope this reading has been helpful! If you feel so inclined, please feel free to send feedback in my ask box, leave feedback in a reblog of this reading, and/or reblog my reading guidelines!

~Jasper

[kaonarvna]

Going through so much right now. Barely have the capacity to do much of anything aside from work and take care of myself and my spouse.

Autistic burnout is truly a cruel mistress. As is having undiagnosed ADHD, knowing what your unmet needs are, and not having the means to access the support you require.

Big vent below. Workplace ableism. ADHD/AuDHD vent.

My spouse is quitting his job again. It happens every year. We've only just now realised "oh my god, it's the autism. It was always the autism" for why he keeps hopping.

He's leaving the current job because they're failing to give him what seems like the most basic accommodations (written instructions, scheduled meetings/literally any notice instead of impromptu "informal chats" in hallways with no record, basic empathy).

He's being told off for "speaking too loudly" and "speaking too enthusiastically" even though all he's talking about with his colleagues is work. They took away his office to turn it into a meeting room, forced him into the communal office space, and have now told him to stop talking to himself or his colleagues.

It's heartbreaking. It's been slowly creeping in for months and it's taken too long for us to realise "oh my god, you need a diagnosis, this is just fucking discrimination, you need formal accommodations and support".

So he's off on the sick now because his stress has become so severe that he just can't function. Before he got the sick note he'd come home and crash every day, and dreaded going to work. He role-played being a warhammer 40k servitor (lobotomised and obedient worker drone, basically) to help him get through the day of staying quiet and doing nothing but work. He'd come home and need so much sensory input and support. And he slept so much, and so poorly. He started to "fail the speech checks" (massively miss social cues and say the wrong thing) with colleagues at work, and came home embarrassed in ways he never was before. He's a very very social animal, and didn't think he had social difficulties, but now he's so worn down that he's realised he does.

He can't mask anymore. He's so tired.

And now that he got that sick note, and plans to leave, he's not dreading waking up each day nearly as much. He's still in the sensory sock every day, and he's still sad and overwhelmed, but he's feeling better.

We've started the process of getting him a diagnosis, but it's going to take months and months and months. We don't really have months. We're going to start applying for new jobs for him, and hopefully get him out of labs. You'd think a chemical laboratory would be the perfect place for an autistic man who loves STEM, but management has always made it unworkable for him. He's always slowly forced out.

And I can barely take care of him, between working full time and having EDS. And I've finally realised I desperately need that ADHD diagnosis, and I need meds. I haven't felt like a person in so long. I haven't felt like myself in years. I feel like this abstract creature inside this horrible prison, and the controls don't work anymore.

Every mental health professional I've seen has asked me, "Have you ever been assessed for ADHD? You've already adopted all the coping mechanisms and lifestyle changes I could recommend. I can't diagnose you, but yknow, think about it."

I've always suspected it. I know I'm autistic. All signs point to ADHD too.

I looked back on every stimulant I've put in my body, and realised that all of them made my brain emptier. They all gave me more control. I was always more able to make choices and act upon them. But I used to associate that with the pain relief (think kratom, nefopam, etc) not the stimulant.

So when I got my pain mostly under control, and I manage it now, I couldn't figure out why I still had so little control over myself.

It's the fucking ADHD.

How much time have I lost to being undiagnosed and unmedicated? How much of my life has slipped down the drain while I paced back and forth, or laid in place "stuck", or ping ponged from incomplete task to incomplete task until I crashed? How much more pleasure could I have experienced if my brain wasn't full of constant noise and thirty different versions of the same thought?

How much have I hurt myself by going "you're fine, you don't need meds" for so many years?

I don't know how long it's going to take to get diagnosed. I've started the process and now we just...wait. But all the evidence points to "yes", and that "meds will probably work and make a massive difference for your quality of life". I might get to be a person someday, or at least a more fulfilled creature.

[heavenpierceher]

Can you infodump about cëll? I'm intrigued.

his full name is Xhai (surname) Cëll (first name), he's 27 years old, and he lives in Detroit in the year 2094 with a robot roommate/weird gay thing named RISC. his gender is male(?) the question mark is consistent. he's a cyborg; roughly 70% of his body is cybernetic. he works freelance as a mercenary hacker, involving everything from breaking into a warehouse to steal data to staring at a console for nine hours a day. people break into his house to try to kill him roughly once every two weeks. 13% of his genetic data was taken from an enormous, powerful corporate AI's neural data and inserted before his birth, enabling him to install more chips in his brain to make his problems worse. he's aloof, polite, charismatic, and pragmatic, but privately obsessive, fairly pretentious, paranoid, and inclined to hedonism and thrillseeking. i'm (slowly) working on a ref for him, but in the meantime here's some fullbody images of him i don't think i've posted before:

i'm not great at talking without a prompt, so i'm giving myself the prompt of this tongue-in-cheek moodboard i made for him a while ago.

the first image was part of the original inspiration for him—the phrasing was funny but resonated with me. he wouldn't do something as public and blatant as driving a bulldozer through an apple store, but he 100% would commit crimes specifically to get pumped full of dmt

he likes weird sex stuff and doing deliberately dangerous things/making himself vulnerable as a challenge to himself; he enjoys testing his limits and also having sex with strangers

he's pretentious and prone to philosophical ramblings, and has weird and intense feelings on coding, AI, robots, etc

in the setting, there's a UBI and a food stipend; he lives largely off of the extremely basic nutrient/electrolyte packs issued to people monthly, seeing it as more efficient. if they made Booze Pods he would fucking love them

a lot of jenny holzer's truisms sort of skewer him as a person. he has pretty bad OCD/PTSD, but isn't aware of it, or if he is he thinks it's actually just his Superior Preparation Skills. he spends a lot of time making his own problems worse for the thrill of getting himself out of them. also he'll fuck basically anyone

as said before, he has strong feelings about technology, and surrounds himself with it 24/7

this is basically his day job; a nonzero amount of the setting is run by 'dumb' helper AIs which he's talented at verbally 'coding', speaking to them in a language that uses english words but doesn't resemble it, comprehensible only to a LLM

he's a heavy smoker; he smokes hand-rolled kratom, clove, and lavender cigarettes. he doesn't have lungs anymore (got impaled, had to replace them) so there's no real consequences for it

that last one is pretty self explanatory at this point i think

[eccyesis]

i love kratom + talk about porno scenarios