#i love domestic shadowgast

[soaring-trash]

[reilora-borealis]

M9 oneshot liveshow is happening in a month and I am losing sleep

WHERE are Caleb and Beau fr???

how are the rest of m9 going to find them if sending is all screwy but more importantly how will Jester survive without her primary outlet for chaos

is this going to be like the search for Grog where Liam and Marisha have to play guest characters

CADUCEUS. (him!)

okay look I need to see shadowgast being domestic but I also need to see shadowgast being angsty but I also need to see shadowgast being extremely horny do you understand

do beauyasha have a kid? do fjorester have a kid???

are veth and yeza divorced

please for the love of god I need someone to get that collar off of Caleb because if no one can roll high enough I will simply bash my head in with a rock

what if we get new character art. what then

they don't know that revivify spells aren't working... what if they find out the hard way

[shadowgast-recs-weekly]

This week, we have eleven fics that feature Caleb, Essek, and at least one other person involved! Look behind the cut for some Shadowidomauk, some Blumenshadow, some Fjord/Essek/Caleb and more!

amongst the things left unforgiven by nonwal (63958, Mature) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

“In which a pair of scourgers shows up at Essek’s doorstep and saves him from himself.“ Slow-burn blumenshadow featuring heavy mistrust, mind games that aren’t mind games, and Caleb mostly in the background thinking he doesn’t deserve to be loved.

Reccer says: One of my all time faves. Nonwal’s gorgeous prose and characterization of these 4 is always top notch, but the dialogue?! The spy vs. spy mind games? The poetic descriptions of longing and grief? The visceral feeling of constant low-level panic punctuated by a full panic attack and maybe developing a crush on your current crush’s evil exes? The DIALOGUE (again)?!?! Absolutely stunning. Side note: chapter 4 features the best Jester dialogue I have ever read. The tag “openly declaring your mutual distrust can be a love language if you do it right” says so much and I love it.

Happily Ever Laughter by Settiai (1288, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: Veth’s alcoholism is brought up a few times but isn’t the focus.

Adorable Essek/Caleb/Veth/Yeza slice of life fic. Polyamory is not nearly as difficult as trying to teach a hyperactive 6 year old magic can be.

Reccer says: Incredibly sweet little domestic fic. The rapport between them is so soft and gentle and well-worn like the most comfortable pair of old house slippers. The moments where Yeza and Caleb glance at each other and manage to communicate in absolute silence (in that pseudo-telepathic way that some real parenting couples often do) are just so perfect, and Veth still finding Essek somewhat aggravating even while she loves him is :chefskiss: delightful.

Three’s Company by flammablehat (2074, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Caleb, Essek, and Fjord have a threesome, and Essek is maybe more than a little jealous about it.

Reccer says: Possessek is always a favorite! Fjord is fjeisty, and Caleb is having the time of his life. It’s both hot and tense.

altogether, infinite possibilities by ivelostmyspectacles (199305, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek has barely begun to cement his place in Caleb’s life when they bring Mollymauk Tealeaf back from the dead. Slowly, the three of them adapt together.

Reccer says: First part of a series! This was my entry point into Shadowgast!

in the pieces of what's left or what we've found by SeaWitchDreams (14620, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Astrid takes some time to figure out how she wants to rebuild her life (and who she wants to rebuild it with.)

Reccer says: a wonderfully subtle and contemplative character study, featuring four wizards carefully dancing around each other

the sea, the stars, the dreamers by nonwal (111996, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: suicidal ideation

Essek sacrifices his budding relationship with Caleb to marry Archmage Astrid Beck - for the good of the entire galaxy. But whatever Astrid's reason for marrying him is, is not nearly as noble.

Reccer says: This fic takes an unusual premise (Blumenshadow arranged marriage spaceship murder mystery with sea shanties?) and *commits* to it. Still incomplete, but if you've liked this author's other works, you won't regret taking a chance on this one.

(Oh,) How a Human Burns by witches_chant (18318, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

This is a story about Essek trying to prepare for eventual loss, depending on if Caleb wants to use the Clone spell or not. But it’s also a story about a lazy, sexy vacation on Rumblecusp where the couple stumble upon a service top and learn things about their relationship (with a happy ending!).

Reccer says: It’s both hot as hell AND feelsy! It’s a really interesting take on Caleb & Essek’s relationship. Honestly I recommend the entire series.

Victim of Convenience by se1ze (54243, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek and Caleb are together, Essek and Kingsley get together, and Kingsley is losing his mind because Caleb can’t get his shit together. An exploration of the very complicated feelings that crop up when a) no one seems to understand who you are, and b) someone you love thinks they need to stay gone for your own good.

Reccer says: The dialogue is fantastic, the sex is wonderful, and the hurt/comfort is amazing. It establishes the foundation upon which Essek/Kingsley can be a thing in a way that is both endearing and completely believable. Caleb is oblivious to how much Kingsley loves him, and once again hurts those around him by throwing himself on his sword.

(nothing in my bones can say) just where you’ve been by SaltCore (8216, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

It takes more time than Caleb realized to get home from the Hellcatch Valley, and in his absence, Essek’s tentative alliance with Astrid and Eadwulf has grown to something more.

Reccer says: Soft and complicated and briefly heartbreaking. The way it manages to feel like an outsider POV reinforces the sense of missing time, of having missed a massive change, and the softness and warmth of everyone’s love for each other is palpable throughout even in the most tense and anxious of moments.

i'll meet judgement by the hounds by necromanticomedy (yelenavasilyevna) (6553, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: Dubcon/Consensual Non Consent, knifeplay

Astrid and Eadwulf come to a dinner party to meet Essek Thelyss. Things either go very poorly or very well, depending on your definitions.

Reccer says: the author called it a "insane psychosexual foursome" but neglected to mention that it's the best insane psychosexual foursome you'll ever read

To The Bone by thetickingclock (2919, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Snapshots of Astrid and Eadwulf's opinion of Essek changing over time (and proximity to Caleb Widogast.)

Reccer says: Hits all my favorite notes when it comes to Blumenshadow, and there's an astounding amount of characterization and relationship development packed into less than 3k words.

Aeor is for Lovers is an 18+ Shadowgast Discord server. The above fanfic recommendations were pulled from our community for this weekly event. All fics, unless otherwise specified, will primarily feature Shadowgast. Have any questions about what this is? Check out the FAQ! Next week, we’ll be back with Lifespan Angst!

[sassy-cass-16]

SHADOWGAST ANGST ENJOYERS COME GET Y'ALL JUICE

i wrote a fic that's weirdly relevant to last night's episode and the absolutely miserable time essek is having right now. i think it's pretty good. i wrote it in a haze between the hours of midnight and 6 am on thursday and i consider it one of the best pieces i've ever written.

it's called of titles and names and deals with essek's guilt and self-hatred while he has copious amounts of spare time living his best domestic life with caleb. healing is not always linear. featuring Hot Professor Widogast's Revolving Door of Romantic Interests Who All Suspiciously Wear Sunhats, and Jester Lavorre's ceaseless love affair with the Sending spell.

[mareastrorum]

Hmm… because I’m curious and wish to encourage violence… 13 and 23.

13. worst blorboficiation

Man, this is a toss up between Molly and Essek.

Molly was not a good person. Molly was unaligned and dipped into callousness. I truly mean that, Molly was cruel at times. Molly’s first instinct was to resort to violence to snap Caleb out of a stupor, even though it was followed up by a forehead kiss that most of his fans romanticize. He wanted to abandon Kiri as quickly as possible. He didn’t want to help the Schuester kids in Hupperdook until Fjord piped up that it was personal to him. Like, I eventually came around to liking Molly because that is a very daring character choice by Taliesin. Molly was a problematic queer, not because his queerness had anything to do with his bad traits, but because he wasn’t a saint, and that took guts to portray queer characters in a negative light given this audience. Then Molly got martyred and all that complexity was ignored. Now he’s just a soft blorbo.

Essek also isn’t a soft cushy boy. He did not care who got killed or hurt as long as he could do the research he wanted to. He did not care for anyone but himself. Those were choices. He didn’t hesitate to hurt or kill people, he just got nervous when he realized he was in situations where opponents could strike back. He cowered when he realized he was vulnerable. It took time for him to choose to take risks like that, to trust people when he wasn’t trusted, and he grew because of it. But a lot of shadowgast fans insist that Essek fell in love with Caleb during the stream or even immediately upon meeting, which, like, no. I think Essek was clearly hoping for friendship from Caleb and the Nein by E141, but I don’t think that had developed into anything romantic or sexual by then. But most portrayals of Essek are nervous, demure, and shy without the cutting, dry sarcasm that I love.

23. ship you've unwillingly come around to

Widomauk and Shadowidomauk. I know that’s surprising given the above answers, but here goes:

Generally, I am not much of a shipper. I tend to crackship for the lolz, especially when the ship is guaranteed to crash and burn. I am a fan of conflict. Because of that, those two ships didn’t appeal to me because most fan writers and artists tend to depict them as very soft, domestic, tame, etc. That’s not a dig on other people who enjoy that, it just doesn’t appeal to me all that much.

Then I learned the evil AU versions exist, and it hit me: they don’t even have to be in an evil AU to butt heads. They absolutely would have some conflict built in because of how Caleb’s background collides against Molly’s worldview and Essek’s hangups. There is so much potential for explosive drama and pain. THEY COULD BE TERRIBLE FOR EACH OTHER.

And sure, you could have them kiss and make up after, but I want the conflict first.

Choose violence ask game.

[critterfloozy]

Critmas 2022 - Reveals and Recs

Reveals are up for this years Critmas Exchange, and here's a few of my favorites from this year.

I definitely suggest checking out the entire collection, there's a lot of good stuff and a lovely variety of fic and art.

From oldest posting date to newest:

Series of Smaller Adventures by 2ManyBoys - Shadowgast, 3576 words. This is a wonderfully soft post-canon domestic Shadowgast fic, complete with book organization, mistranslations, and cats.

Fjord's Very Best Day by @EnemytoSleep - Fjord, 3902 words. It's the gift I received this year, but I would have gotten a spot on this rec list anyway - on Fjord's experiences after the sinking of the Tide's Breath, and some of the choices he made after. A lovely and at times very visceral character study.

Your Heart Taking Root by @demenior - Fearne & Orym & Dorian, 2732 words. An soft and well characterized exploration of the trio's friendship - amazing work on character's voices, and they all love each other so much, each in their own way.

i usually run when the world starts ending by @grayintogreen - Artagan/Jester Lavorre, 4515 words. Artagan grappling with his not-quite-godhood during the Iron Shepherd's arc. It does a great job incorporating other pieces of Critical Role lore, and Artie is extremely fey while still clearly in love.

And then my own:

Someone Else's Ghost Story - Kingsley Tealeaf, 3429 words. While in Rexxentrum, Kingsley runs into someone from Lucien's past. Spoilers for The Nine Lives of Lucien, but more importantly, the story probably makes a great deal more sense if you know the spoilers beforehand. Anyway, check them all out! And thanks again to @capitola for stepping in at the last minute to run it!

[burningdarkfire]

2022 fic rec list

i somehow fell out of the habit of reading fic halfway through the year so recent works are scant, but here are some of the highlights that have stuck with me over the year

critical role:

storyless houses by @callingvoicemail (shadowgast) - really interesting take on a less-explored part of caleb’s character. literally when i read this for the first time in march i knew that it would be one of my fave fics of the year and i was entirely correct

amongst the things left unforgiven by @nonwal (wizard ot4) - i was late to reading this but i’m so happy i saved it. it’s all about *clenches fist* wanting to live

do you have enough love in your heart, to go and get your hands dirty? by @saltytothecore (former blumendrei + shadowgast) - truly all i want in life are the wizards interacting. astrid wears second person POV so wonderfully here

like real people do by @callingvoicemail (yasha) - i have a knack for digging too deep into sol’s side storylines, but there is something about caleb and how he fits into beau and yasha’s new domestic life that really resonated with me in this fic. sometimes it’s the small details that ride with me for a long time

(unnamed snippet) by @essektheylyss (fjord) - writing like this reminds me why fjord was my favourite member of the m9 for a long, long time. he’s such a damn interesting character and this is a perfect encapsulation of one of the reasons why!

arcane/league of legends:

sanctified by @aevallare (jayvik) - we love it when the boys meet alternate universe versions of themselves and alex has an insane knack for nailing giopara and everything that makes him tick in just a sentence or the turn of a phrase

the rom-com where you kill your father by @drtechmaturgics (jayvik) - i’m cheating because i read this in 2021 but it was published in december and i’m literally still insane about it a year+ later. it deserves a second shoutout

the witcher:

the wrong way by @lurikko (geraskier) - fics that make love and desire complicated are just absolutely my shit. excellent narrative voice here that carries an interesting premise all the way through

o, empathy by @nectarine-pit (geraskier) - a great bodyswap fic. the good shit = a trope fulfilled really, really well

the locked tomb:

whatever souls are made of, yours and mine are the same (insult) by flemeth (augustine/mercymorn) - i am completely serious when i say that this fic haunts me in the most insane of ways. if i had to pick a genuine top #1 fave for the year, this would be it

twin human highway flares by @thefaustaesthetic (campal) - getting my feelings hurt while thinking about among us is exactly what i need from my tlt fic

hypnagogia by @thefaustaesthetic (campal) - again: shit that simply makes me insane. no further comments, your honour

hannibal: (no, i don’t really remember how i ended up here either)

wolf and i by @t-pock (hannigram) - listen i am digging this fic up from 2014 to tell you to read it because it has insanely good build-up and pay-off

and just for my own reference, i also dabbled in a decent number of ofmd, jjk, and the sandman fics this year

[quinn-of-aebradore]

Finished Rowen's playthrough across last night and this afternoon, screenshots and epilogue stuff for y'all!

A collection of Rowen & Astarion's "this might be our last kiss" kisses

One final group shot!

And Astarion's conversation after arriving at the outskirts of the Morphic Pool

Epilogue stuff under cut for spoilers!

Okay not quite epilogue but Lae'zel took down the Emperor in one turn with Soulbreaker to stun him and then an Action Surge and I love her so much for that.

Now to epilogue!

Orpheus transformed himself into a mindflayer to defeat the brain, Rowen mercy-honor killed him afterwards, and Lae'zel took off to lead the githyanki against Vlaakith (headcanon extension of the scene, Rowen did not let her leave without a hug and a promise to see each other again)

Gale decided not to use the Crown for himself! And that yeah, when she yells at him to, he'll go recover it and give it to Mystra, but for now he's just gonna chill. Which I love for him.

Wyll and Karlach headed off to Avernus together. Fucking loved their final cutscene, it was so cool, excellent way to close out the game. They are 100% a couple in this timeline.

Shadowheart... didn't have anything? She asked Rowen what she wanted to do now, celebrate or what have you, but that was all? I don't know. I think, headcanon wise, I'll have her go off with Lae'zel, since they're together in this run (in my mind, obviously). I don't know, I am Confused about her lack of ending, but that's my idea.

And Astarion and Rowen. Beloveds. Astarion remained a spawn, so he did have to flee the docks as the smoke cleared and the sun came out. Only reason Rowen didn't follow was because Karlach's engine started to go at like, the same moment. But! The two of them are going to have a nice, quiet little domestic epilogue, Shadowgast style. Rowen is an abjurer, her first project once she gets set up with a proper enchanting lab is making a protective enchantment so Astarion can walk in the sun again. They also probably end up somewhat connected to whatever new thieves guild faction rises up in the wake of the Guild and the Zhent both being dead. Other than that? Quiet little life, as they've earned.

[daggersandarrows]

CHOOSE VIOLENCE!!! 7, 8, 10

choosing violence!!

7. what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?

ok this is going to be a weird one but. fjord.

TO BE CLEAR i fucking love fjord and i think his arc is one of my favorites but there came a point sometime after he'd sort of settled into being a cleric of the wildmother when a certain meta writer--who i respect very much, they seem very smart--started to make meta posts after each episodes where i was nodding along enthusiastically, ready for them to draw me into the conclusion....where they inevitably went "which is why this was all about fjord and his journey."

i got...so...sick of this, especially as the story focused more on caleb and then on beau and yasha. and this person's meta is super popular, so i saw it EVERYWHERE even after i unfollowed. i just wanted to scream "not everything is about your blorbo oh my god". and i started to roll my eyes any time fjord said anything before i was like wait. what. i like fjord. and i realized it was just dread at the anticipation of looooong metas that were Just About Fjord.

in retrospect this is totally on me, i should've just blocked them, but their only crime was being slightly annoying so i chickened out.

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

that jester is innocent and clueless, especially wrt sex. it is absolutely incredible to me how many people completely forget that she was given a pretty thorough private education and oh yeah that her mom is a sex worker?? who's VERY frank with her?

no--jester is inexperienced. jester is that one friend you know who has kinks you've never heard of and reads piles of smut and has never had sex. she knows Exactly what goes on, she just has very unrealistic ideas about the possibility of being railed by the pizza delivery man.

bringing me to my final point: why don't more people do an aspec or arospec of jester?? it's RIGHT there

10. worst part of fanon

i'm so incredibly bored by "and then they were happily into peaceful cottagecore domesticity for the rest of their days" type shipping (with ONE exception), espeeeecially with queer ships. y'all think yasha "i'll throw you under a bridge" nydoorin is gonna be a quiet, settled housewife with her adhd, violence prone, poison immune wife? caleb "i want to bend reality to my will" and essek literally started a war thelyss are going to find a nice place in rexxentrum and settle down? with KIDS? (i find it impossible to believe shadowgast would want kids. i Get the impulse and i will never yuck anyone's yum but i personally find it incredibly out of character). (conversely, i do find ridiculously sweet/cutesy/fluffy shipping of these characters to be generally kind of funny but really endearing. it's just the "settling down" bit--like. i just can't believe these guys would ever sit still.)

my one exception is of course percahlia, in part because their cottage is less a cottage and more local government, and more relevantly because i think the two of them getting a quiet comfortable existence is actually sort of a radical idea. "i was going to be a clockmaker once" just fucking kills me. for a character to be, as taliesin put it, karmically fated to have a bad ending, to get the typical fairy tale happily ever after treatment...for vex to gain both wealth and importance...it just feels right.

thanks tangereen :)

[edelgarfield]

yeah yeah domestic shadowgast we love to see it, but i need to see beauregard bullying essek at work. "this is my brother-in-law, he's a fucking nerd and he'll get bowled over by a stiff breeze. make him carry your books it builds character."

everyone stop, beauregard being essek's/seth's boss is basically canon that's the FUNNIEST possible thing that could've happened

[shadowgast-recs-weekly]

Established Relationship Recs!

This week, we have ten recs for fics that feature Caleb and Essek in an established relationship! Check them out under the cut, and as always - comment or kudos if you like them!

I shine only with the light you gave me by SkyScribbles (4533, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: None

There are certain things that an Umavi's son should not do, if he wishes to avoid his mother's rage and the disgust of his Den. Dancing with a human is most certainly among them.

Reccer says: The tension between the Umavi and Essek is incredibly well written, and I really liked seeing the machinations involved. Verin's spin on it all, as well as the wizard's conversation during the dance itself, made me laugh.

put your sweet lips on my lips by LadyOrpheus (15750, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: Heat but not A/B/O

Essek has finally found someone he wants to share a heat with. Now if only his heat would get the memo

Reccer says: A+ smut, lovely characterization, and a rare non-omegaverse heat fic

where's the point in hurrying (when waiting feels so great) by mllekurtz (TheKnittingJedi) (4438, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

"You weren’t paying attention." That was Essek’s justification, delivered in a perfectly even and reasonable tone, when he entered Caleb’s study for the second time that evening, wearing nothing but jewellery.

Reccer says: A wonderful exchange of control between two wizards who love each other

memory in double exposure by hanap (11479, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Caleb and Essek had a falling out. Essek visits Jester several times before things get sorted.

Reccer says: Not only is the shadowgast heartbreakingly earnest, but Jester and Essek’s friendship is beautifully portrayed. The progression feels so natural, and the ending is so satisfactory after the build.

small works of cosmic scale by mousecookie (2547, General) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek is living incognito in Nicodranas and Caleb visits him after receiving an urgent message

Reccer says: It's cute and touching

Mitosis by queenbeetle (4325, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

caleb learns a new spell and essek is eager to push his limits.

Reccer says: SUPER hot!

Iridescent Hearts by onyxshinigami (4822, Mature) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Domestic Fic from Caleb's point of view. Essek is obviously up to something and Caleb is delighted with a little mystery. They have a home! They have 3 cats!

Reccer says: It's a light, fun read. A cute little mystery/surprise for both Caleb and the reader.

the firebird & the star by quinn_of_aebradore (293, General) Reccer's Content Notes: None

In the Empire, they tell a story. The Dynasty tells one as well, similar in nature. Reality is quite different.

Reccer says: I liked it!

dress me up, make it tight, i’m your doll by atlasarcana (15516, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Caleb has been creating a wardrobe of body jewelry for Essek. Essek volunteers to model as a mannequin

Reccer says: Interesting kink and Very hot

in guidance and tethered essence by Allinna (2868, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek tries to bake apple tarts.

Reccer says: It's super domestic and cute, plus the way the whole cooking process is (essek pov) unnecessarily academic is really fun!

Aeor is for Lovers is an 18+ Shadowgast Discord server. The above fanfic recommendations were pulled from our community for this weekly event. All fics, unless otherwise specified, will primarily feature Shadowgast. Have any questions about what this is? Check out the FAQ! Next week, we’ll be back with Clothing!

[omniscientwreck]

Day 6: Time & Transformation // Temptation

Day 6 of @shadowgastweek (I’m very late I know I’m sorry!) 

Please enjoy this little glimpse into the future I hope the wizards will get one day, please let me know what you think! 

“Caleb?”

“Ja?” The wizard looks over, silver hairs peeking through the copper and he pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose looking over from the loveseat where his papers and books were sprawled across the dark upholstery.

A familiar, grin spreads freely across his features.

“Can I tempt you away from your studies for a moment?”

Eyebrows raise and a mischievous glint, “Well you know, this is some important work I’m doing. I’m not sure if you can compete.”

Gliding over, Essek leans down over the human’s form, sporting his own devilish grin. The wizard’s eyes raked over him with a hunger. That could wait. They have time. “Oh I assure you I can be quite compelling.” And he leans in to kiss Caleb. Kissing him is so comfortable, safe, it fills him with a warmth he’d never previously known. It’s been years and it still excites him when their lips connect. Caleb’s short stubble scrapes a bit before they part, Essek righting himself and offering Caleb a hand.

“I have to say Thelyss, you make a good case. What is it?”

“I just wanted to talk with you, about tomorrow.”

As Caleb stands he smiles reassuringly, “Mein Engel, you are still nervous?” He grabs for Essek’s hand, lacing their fingers together. Caleb’s hands are strong and his fingers are wider than Essek’s. It’s easy to feel reassured in his grasp, familiar callouses rough as Caleb’s thumb rubs circles into his hand. “The spell has been performed many times without issue, we’ve got it figured out. I’m certainly excited to see what happens.”

Essek nods, “Of course I am excited too, but well. The other times it was you and now it’s me and transmutation certainly isn’t my specialty.”

A gentle laugh falls from Caleb’s lips and he squeezes Essek’s hand, “You know you really don’t give yourself enough credit. You quite nearly pioneered an entire school of magic. You’ve been it’s foremost scholar and teacher for some time. I understand nerves but I promise you I trust your ability. You’ll have the rest of the Nein there, Veth has had it done to her and the rest were there with us the first time. I will be okay. Besides, won’t you be happy for me to be rid of some of these age markers?”

He winks at Essek, teasing, already knowing the answer. “You grow more beautiful every day Caleb, I have never once regretted the aging of your body. You know very well it’s not about looks, it’s about time.” Caleb stops their walking and wraps his arms around him, pulling Essek in and kissing him gently, chastely. “Regardless of how old you look or what happens tomorrow I intend to stay by your side until death. But we only have one life so we may as well lengthen our time.”

Caleb kisses the tip of his nose and they continue outside of their home. The dark of the night engulfs them and the glow of the stars is vibrant as always, Essek looks at his husband and tries to quell the nerves, the anticipation, when a voice fills his mind, “Hey Essek it’s Jester! I couldn’t wait to see you and Caleb until tomorrow, it’s been so long and I’ve missed you so much. I’m-” the spell cuts off and he waits a few moments to see if she plans to recast.

When he hears nothing he responds, out loud so Caleb can hear, “Hello Jester. It is good to hear from you. We’re home and I believe you know our address. You’re welcome at any time.”

Caleb’s crows feet crinkle around his still piercing blue eyes, “Well, if Jester’s here then so is Fjord and I can’t imagine the others are far behind. We should prepare the guest beds.”

They float inside to welcome their friends and briefly Essek’s anxiety is pushed to the back of his mind.

-----

Long ago he’d finally stopped referring to the Nein as ‘Caleb’s friends’ and accepted his role in their lives and allowed them to step into their roles in his properly. Agents of change, bestowers of affection, it’s been about a year since they last saw everyone together.

Ten years ago when they defeated Lucien the group took a break. Jester and Fjord split off to Nicodranas with Veth, Caduceus went home, Yasha and Beau had posted up mainly in Zadash, and Essek and Caleb spent a great deal of time travelling and exploring. Whenever one of the Nein called they all answered, whether it was something as simple as providing fire power when Beau had an investigation or something as momentous as tying up loose ends from their past, they remained steadfast to one another.

Jester, Fjord, and Veth and her family are the first to arrive and Essek opens a well aged wine. Luc is a teenager at this point and he’s becoming a bit of a menace at the amusement of his uncles. Caleb had previously taught him message and he’s been getting a lot of mileage out of it. Jester and Fjord have stories from having come back from a few months at sea, helping with some errands for merchant ships for old times’ sake.

Their home feels full and alive, and the next moring when Beau and Yasha arrive, and then Caduceus it feels like the family is whole again.

They begin digging clay out of the back yard just as they had the first time and as everyone assumes their positions, laughing and joking, filling the backyard with cacophonous uproar, Essek is hit with nostalgia.

He misses travelling with them, having them by his side and standing at theirs throughout some of the worst confrontations in history. He misses the jokes they lob his way with ease, Fjord and Veth hurling insults back and forth, all of it. It seems like so much time has passed since they had last upturned his yard to help a friend into a new form, but in his comparatively long life it’s hardly any time at all.

They assemble the clay, sprinkling in diamond dust and Essek is basically useless with nerves, they’ve created the trough, incorporated the diamond dust. All that’s left is him. They pause to eat, Caduceus’ cooking a welcome break from the day’s preparations.

Dinner is delicious, and loud, full of stories Luc and Yeza have heard dozens of times but still delightful all the same. As they finish eating and prepare to cast the rest clean up as Essek floats outside to check their arrangement one last time. He feels a punch land on the back of his shoulder, where he was once marked by the Nonagon and Beau surveys alongside him, the day’s work. “Hey man, you okay?”

He should be used to her check-ins but she still puts him on edge despite their ‘beef’ as she put it having been ‘squashed’ years ago. “I am alright. This is a big deal and well, I just want to perform well.”

“You will.” She rubs his shoulders a bit and continues, “You know, I didn’t think you deserved him. Even after we figured our shit out and you like became cool. I didn’t think you were good enough for him. Thanks for proving me wrong, you’re good people and I know you’ll take care of him. You’re nervous because you care and that shows me a lot about you. You’ve always been that way but. Well, I see the way you look at him, it’s just real fucking nice.”

All he can do in response is nod and swallow hard, he doesn’t have words to explain what the reassurance means. He kneels down to ensure the dimensions are right for the fiftieth time and the others come out breaking the silence.

“Ah- before we begin can I steal him quickly?” Caleb asks his friends as if they have somewhere else to be or any reason to deny the couple a few words. He takes Essek a good distance away so they can talk without being overheard. “Schatz, are you ready?”

“It feels like I should be asking you that. You know the form you would like to assume?”

Caleb nods, “Just as we discussed, we’ll put us on a more even playing field.”

Essek tucks a stray strand of copper hair behind a rounded ear and looks at his husband’s face one last time, “I can’t say I won’t miss this view Widogast, you are a most striking man.”

Caleb just laughs and kisses him gently, “Well you have much to look forward to.”

They stay like that for a moment, hands clasped, pulling their bodies close, eye to eye. Determination and a stoic resilience fall over Essek and he nods to Caleb, “Ready?”

“Ready.”

All told the casting is uneventful. The Nein are knelt in a circle around Caleb with Essek at the head, kissing him one last time before beginning the incantation. As the wind picks up and arcane lines and symbols light up, Essek’s concentration is stone cold. The clay begins slowly building over Caleb, covering his face entirely and as the view of his partner is taken from him he seems to connect on a deeper level to Caleb’s psyche. They think together of the chosen form, and he can feel a reassuring wave come off of Caleb as he continues reciting the incantation. The runes light and as he continues casting and putting everything he has into ensuring their mutual happiness. His voice gradually rises and arcane power swirls around them, hair freely whipping around the faces of his friends, watching with confidence, Yasha smiling knowingly at him across the vessel. He can feel the heat radiating as his hands pass over Caleb and at the hour the clay bursts, the ensuing wave of arcane energy pushes him back a foot or so, even in his kneeling position. The light from the spell is snuffed instantly and the night is dark again. Before them is Caleb anew.

He brushes clay away from his face with slender fingers, gently sitting up as Jester helps him. Essek floats over, kneeling beside him where he sits.

Caleb turns to look at him, he has the same copper hair and bright blue eyes, but the skin is smooth and free of stubble, his ears narrow to a point, and his features are just a little finer.

They did it.

Caleb looks at Essek for a moment, not dissimilar from the look they’d shared as they met at the altar the day they were wed, “So this is what you look like in the dark.”

He cups Essek’s face with a smooth hand and laughs lightly as the Nein begin chattering around them, Essek doesn’t hear what they say as Caleb brings his new lips to Essek’s and they’re locked in their second first kiss. Pulling back slightly, Essek’s laughter rings out and they press their foreheads together. He feels someone wrap their arms around the two of them and eventually the rest of the Nein join. In the middle of the large group hug two wizards hold each other and time stretches before Essek as the full gravity of the what they’ve done makes his heart soar. Time will catch up eventually, it always does, but for now they have plenty.

[callioope]

Still haven’t moved on from the Mighty Nein, and I know we are getting so much amazing content for the CR seventh anniversary but I’ve had this sitting in my head forever and now seems as good a time as any to post. 

Mighty Nein additional content wishlist:

(1) Comic about Beau and Yasha’s post campaign adventures

illustrations of visiting Yasha’s tribe which technically we did see but. graphics for it would be sweet i think

story about how they adopt the kids from Fjord’s orphanage

happy soft domestic moments, possibly involving mild gardening drama, Essek and Caduceus cameo

(2) Novel about Esesk and Caleb’s Aeor Adventures 

Essek and and Caleb keep in touch between leaving the Grove and reuniting for their Aeor Adventure (“don’t be a stranger” Essek wonders as he trudges through the Aeor snow back to the outpost. “i am isolated in this frozen waste how exactly am i supposed to go about that” well sir you are a mage; essek invents a spell to communicate with caleb long distance because i’m sorry but the 25-word Sending is not enough to support extensive scholarly spell debates

whatever the heck the Devexian fall out is, and also maybe insight about what the heck those bubbles of people were about. i need to know.

speaking of things i need to know. extensive essek backstory as he and caleb get to know each other. specifically, what the heck adeen did and why he sucks.

lots of pining and healing and making magic together

(3) and of course, an Uk’otoa (uk’otoa) One Shot

One-year later reunion party on Rumblecusp (I know I know, a Beauyasha wedding would be ideal BUT they already did the fancy ‘wedding gets sabotaged by recurring villain’ shtick with Vox Machina so I’m trying to be realistic about what might be possible)

For some reason, they can’t just teleport there (maybe too risky that they could end up in the ocean?), so they have to sail, and that’s how Uk’otoa & Minions ambush them

Now I know what I said about weddings above, BUT a PotC esque wedding on the ship would be pretty sweet. I have no preference for which couple but Fjord and Jester ARE the pirates after all, and Fjord would be the pseudo ‘main character’ for such a one shot 

Speaking of ships, the most important part of my wish is this: (a) Aabria DMs so that Matt can play Essek; (b) near the start of the one shot, while sailing, Jester visits Essek’s room hoping to catch Caleb there with him as the Nein all have bets about whether or not Essek and Caleb are together. Jester stretches out an awkward conversation -- possibly Essek is in the bath? I don’t know if that makes sense to have a bath on a ship -- and eventually Jester leaves. As soon as she’s gone, Caleb pops up and says ‘I thought she’d never leave.’ VM fans know exactly what I’m talking about. This is how Liam and Matt reveal Shadowgast Established Relationship. And how Liam gets his comeuppance against Laura

They invite Vilya, who not only comes but also brings her daughter; Keyleth meets Essek so they can start their ‘long-lived characters in love with liam’s characters support group’ 

[kmackatie]

the breath before the phrase

The ringing note of a concert A is played by the oboe, echoing on its own in the space. It’s picked up by the wind section, followed rapidly by the brass, and the familiar feeling of an orchestra calibrating takes over Caleb. The tonal adjustments as each person brings their instrument into alignment sinks into him, and something inside Caleb shifts in recognition as Essek leads the strings into their own tuning.

It’s like something is waking up, like something unfurling and firing across long unused paths of memory. His hands shake slightly, as he raises his bow and joins them, fingers fumbling against the pegs and fine tuners that give him the control over his instrument.

I have missed this, he thinks, the tug of a smile on his face.

————

Essek Thelyss is a leading violinist, his spot as Shadowhand of the Rosohna Philharmonic Orchestra has been uncontested for over a decade. Caleb Widogast is a recent arrival to the city, convinced by his friends to audition for one of the vacant violinist positions. 

After starting off on the wrong foot, Caleb and Essek get to slowly know each other, discover what brings them joy, create while defying expectations, and find out that what they can produce together may just be better than anything they can do separately.

Hello friends, I am here with the first chapter of the breath before the phrase, previously known as the musicians au.

This has been a labour of love since June 2021 (I found the original tweet) that I finally have in a place that I feel comfortable to start posting. Updates will be a little spaced out at the start, but should get more consistent. Current word count is 91,570, and I expect it to end up in the 150k range.

Fandom: Critical Role - The Mighty Nein Rating: Explicit (eventually) Relationship: Essek Thelyss / Caleb Widogast Characters: Essek Thelyss, Caleb Widogast, Lythir VaSuun, Verin Thelyss, The Mighty Nein, Deirta Thelyss, Uraya Hythenos Additional Tags: background canon relationships, alternate universe - modern setting, musicians au, professional musicians, POV Essek Thelyss, POV Caleb Widogast, acquaintances to friends to lovers, friends to lovers, complicated relationships, previous friends with benefits (not shadowgast), Caleb typical backstory, first kiss, developing relationship, explicit sexual content, the wizards as musicians, anxiety, panic attacks, references to past dubious consent, past relationship trauma, demisexual Essek Thelyss, bisexual Caleb Widogast, domestic fluff, occupational fluff, emotionally intense conversations, happy ending, discovering self Chapters: 1/20 Words: 4,197

read on AO3 here

[khadaj-ballad]

Shadowgast is canon and all y’all are writing and talking about lifespan angst😭 please I beg of you, domestic fluff would come first! Let Caleb and Essek be domestic together💜🧡

I just imagine them doing theyre own things during the day, Caleb teaching and helping out the cobalt soul, and Essek just creating confusing leads to follow as he avoids his pst, and then coming home to a pretty house in Nicodranas, next to Veth’s and next to Jester and fjord’s, where they stay when they’re not sailing.

Just cute Essek and Caleb domestic moments, like Caleb cooking, Essek gardening, Caleb adopting a bunch of neighborhood cats (it really just Jester and Veth bringing cats to the shadowgast house and just letting them into the garden for Essek and Caleb to find) Essek giving Caleb haircuts and vice versa. Caleb and Essek taking care of one another when one of them gets a cold. Muggy rainy days of cuddling on a couch drinking a tea from cad and reading together in familiar and comfortable silence. Maybe some day they adopt. Essek help Caleb grade, and eventually Caleb gets him a job and they both think it’s hilarious. Just soft gentle loving Shadowgast.

(And maybe Shadowgast being spicy too;) )

(And one day Essek comes home, human, and it’s not an illusion this time because he wants nothing more than to send his life with his friends and his lover, his soulmate, his partner❤️‍🔥 plus he’d out live Cad and cad deserves to bury all his friends in the blooming grove, Essek included.)

They’re lifelong best friends, husbands, soulmates and these two broken people, grow and heal and get a happily ever after.

[holdbeast]

I get this discourse around this Shadowgast ending, but I also have no time for it.

Yes, it’s sad for Essek that Caleb didn’t love him enough to say screw everything, I’m extending my lifespan to be together forever.

But I mean. Essek has at least 600 more years left to live! He has all the knowledge he gained from studying Aeor with his actual genius boyfriend, and probably has said boyfriend’s spellbook too! He’s been changed and knows how to make meaningful connections!

C2 wasn’t Essek’s big adventure, after which he retires to be domestic. It was his Big Good origin story complete with angsty lost first love. I think that’s pretty damn positive for him