#i literally have a whole pinterest board of them
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Some hentai male protagonists are so fucking handsome like they deserve to be in other stories rather than just hentais… ykwim???? UGHHH
I’m specifically talking about those men in like 5 chapter he ntais LIKE BAE U DESERVE MORE THAN THAT 😤😭
#i literally have a whole pinterest board of them#so far I got 147 pins already… about to add more and more#🩷.diary
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lover boy era felix pov like a worm in my brain i dont know if there's enough to actually turn it into a story instead of random writing bursts but i just wanna write him being silly and whimsical and bisexual
#the funny thing about it is like#the whole Felix Has A Girlfriend era was just a self indulgent plot bunny from LITERALLY 2020#like in my head it was Post Events Of The Novel but also i didnt know if it was canon bc that would mean that beaulix breaks up#(which...LOL bc they literally do now)#anyway its so old the pinterest board desc calls RR church mud and that was a jumpscare#now i'm reviving it to write the most self indulgent bisexual shit ever#also i never really developed her as a character because i never thought i'd write anything abt it#whenever i have a love interest i immediately take them out of the love dynamic so i can figure them out on their own#then try to fit them back in#so now im like yayyyy new toy to play with. cant wait to figure out what's weird about her#thing is though i fear it is a healthy and whimsical relationship and theyre not psychologically tormenting one another so like. BORING!#not a bad thing but like i need to figure out where he's being psychologically tormented besides like. his own brain
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DOWN BAD! 01
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Synopsis: Despite undeniable chemistry, your guys’ relationship remains undefined, caught between playful teasing to deeper, unspoken longing,
Pairings: bad boy! jungkook x fem! reader
Genre: friends to lovers. college au.
Warnings: toxicity, jealousy, explicit content, angsty, smoking, usage of drugs and alcohol, fighting, profanity, slowburn, jungkook and oc are literally in love but do nothing about it, crying, hurtful words being thrown out when arguing, slapping.
a/n: IM BACK!! this is something super different than anything I have ever wrote sooooo… but i actually really love it. This would be a two-shot. Hope you enjoy🪽🪽 <3
pinterest board. playlist 02! 03!
"He pisses me off," you say while dropping onto the couch with a loud annoyed sigh, catching Taehyung's and Dahlia's attention.
"What did he do now?" Taehyung jokes, adjusting his tie on his uniform. "Look at another girl, that's what he did," you clench your teeth, fighting the urge to roll your eyes. Your fingers play with the hem of your short navy squared skirt.
Your friends let out a collective laugh, making you scoff at them. "He asked a girl for a cigarette," you mumble under your breath, feeling the pang of jealousy hit your heart.
"Morning," a deep voice speaks from behind you, sending shivers down your body almost automatically. Your brows furrow as Jungkook makes his way beside you on the small couch in the lounge room after acknowledging his friends. His white button-up is opened, revealing a peak of his skin, which annoys you. He tugs on his navy tie, the same one as yours, undoing it and letting it hang loosely around his neck.
"Are you done being mad?" He tilts his head to the side, staring at you. His breath smells of the cigarette he had been smoking, the same one he accepted from a girl who had a crush on him, which irked you. You almost wanted to snatch the cigarette from his lips and stomp on it like a child when he lit it up.
"No, I'm not done being mad," you scoff, getting up from the couch in a swift motion. Jungkook lets out a frustrated sigh behind you before reaching for your skirt and pulling it down.
"Too short," he says, ignoring your whole tantrum.
You don’t reply. Instead, you smack his hand away from your ass before picking up your backpack and throwing it at him.
"Let’s go to class," you say, crossing your arms in front of you, making your boobs push up from the white button-up—you had intentionally left two buttons open after seeing him. His eyes immediately drop to your chest, and Jungkook pokes his cheek with his tongue on the inside before letting out a soft growl and reaching to button up your shirt.
"You’re insufferable," he lets out, fixing your shirt.
"You’re insufferable," you mock back, earning a grin from him.
"Are you ready to talk to me?" He bites his bottom lip, picking up your pink backpack and hanging it over his shoulder, something he was used to doing by now. "No, but the attitude is kinda hot, not gonna lie," you say, before making your way to your first period, with Jungkook trailing behind you like a puppy on a leash.
You and Jungkook weren’t dating, nor were you friends with benefits either. You were just friends with feelings bigger than Mount Everest. It all started on the first day of sophomore year of high school.
“No more fights, okay. First day only and you already got into a fight,” Namjoon blows out a sigh, running a hand down his face.
Jungkook scoffs, pulling on his tie. “This uniform is pissing me off.” He growls, ignoring Namjoon's attempt to coax him into a conversation about controlling his anger issues. Jungkook wasn’t in the mood to deal with any of it, especially today.
“Yeah, well, fancy private schools love their uniforms,” Namjoon jokes, but Jungkook's expression remains jaded.
“Anyways, you’re lucky you didn’t get suspended,” Namjoon continues, shooting Taehyung a look that screams for help.
“Lucky? I would’ve preferred if they expelled me,” Jungkook mumbles, leaning back on his chair, throwing his head back in annoyance.
Before Namjoon could mutter another response about self-sabotaging, a female voice catches Jungkook's interest. “I don’t give a fuck, she literally ripped my new tights,” you whine, your hair disheveled, the lipstick once on your lips now smeared, and your new black over-the-knee tights, ripped.
“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean you could tackle her to the ground, Yn,” another girl says, nudging you, which makes you pout more. “My mom is going to kill me for getting into a fight on the first day.” You sit down in front of Jungkook, not even glancing his way, throwing your pink backpack on the ground beside you, keeping your eyes on the ground.
Jungkook takes notice of your appearance, and his heart rate skyrockets. You were beautiful, like an angel, but Jungkook knew better than to think you were innocent. The skirt was much shorter than it was supposed to be, your blouse more open than closed, which had Jungkook's eyes dropping to the tie between your tits, taking notice of the cross necklace hanging on your neck.
Angel with dirty wings. Jungkook thought to himself as he took you in, the smeared lipstick adding to your allure. Your full and pouty messy lips, had him imagining things only he imagined when he was in his room at night with his hand wrapped around his cock.
Instead, he's sitting at the front office with a pretty girl in front of him for the same reason he was. As he is thinking about far more inappropriate things than fighting. Before Jungkook could look away, your eyes met his.
“You’re new,” you grin at the bruised-up boy manspreading with a matching grin on his face in front of you.
“I am,” Jungkook replies, licking his bloody bottom lip with his tongue. Eyes still remain glued to yours as you nod. “I’ve never seen you around,” you state, tilting your head to the side, leaning forward.
“And I’m pretty sure I would remember someone that looked like you,” you continue, taking him in. The black blazer, with the school logo, he was supposed to be wearing was discarded on the chair beside him, leaving him in the white button-up, sleeves rolled up halfway, giving you a full view of the veins on his arms. His black hair was tousled on his head, the bloody lip made him hotter than you cared to admit.
“Is this a way of telling me you don’t have a boyfriend?” Jungkook flirts, ignoring his friends' obvious stares from beside him.
“Not yet,” you quirk, tapping your finger on your bare thigh. “What’s your name?” you ask, wanting to know more about the boy in front of you besides the fact that he gets into fights on the first day of school.
“Does it matter? You’ll be calling me “baby” by the end of the day,” Jungkook says aloof, which gets him a small smile from you. “Smooth,” you shrug, leaning backward.
"Angel," he says, his hands snaking around your waist, pulling you in.
"Hi," you smile at him, your eyes twinkling with unspoken affection.
"Hi," Jungkook responds, his dimple carving into his skin as he leans forward, his nose touching yours, nuzzling—a short, quick gesture that steals the air from your lungs. You almost feel yourself hanging onto these moments by a thread—moments where he isn’t high or drunk out of his mind or fighting with anyone who pisses him off in the slightest.
"Do you like my costume?" You flutter your eyelashes at him sarcastically, eliciting a small laugh as he throws his head back into the wall. "I don’t know, do I?" he says, his tone dipped in enticing sarcasm. His tattooed hand drops lower on your back, causing your breath to hitch in your mouth.
The music suddenly muffles out as you focus on Jungkook’s finger dipping into the waistband of your skirt. "You look pretty," he whispers into your ear, sending shivers down your spine.
"Where’s your halo, baby?" he says, pulling on your perfectly curled hair, making you look up at him. "Lost it while I was dancing," you pout, wrapping your arms around his waist, pulling him in closer to you.
You’ve never understood when people said, “home could be a person,” but you hundred percent get it now. It's almost embarrassing how quickly you melt into his embrace, your limbs relaxing—inhaling his scent. Your brain suddenly shuts down, not thinking about anything besides him, the moment he wraps his arms over your shoulders, dropping his lips on the crown of your head, leaving a soft kiss there.
"Don’t smile," you jut out, peeping your head up to see the small curved smile displayed on his face. "Why not?" he pokes, amusement clear in his face as his smile widens, deepening his dimples.
"Stop," you giggle, placing a small hand over his face.
"What?" he chuckles, getting a hold of your hand, giving your wrist a kiss before letting it hang beside you. "Your dimples are showing, and they’re only mine to see. Bitches love dimples," you say, only making him smile more.
Anyone else who saw Jungkook smiling all giddy at you would know better than to poke fun at him—but it was rare to see Jungkook smiling and laughing so casually out in the open. Behind closed doors, Jungkook was the epitome of a teddy bear; he loved head and back scratches and loved being a little spoon, all contrary to his dark clothes, cigarettes hanging from his mouth, and the heavy amount of alcohol he could consume.
"Be a good boyfriend and stop smiling, please," you quip, untangling from his embrace and looking around for Dahlia, only to be met with her making out with Taehyung on the countertop.
"I’m not your boyfriend, angel," Jungkook says beside you, putting a hand over your shoulders, taking a chug out of his beer.
"Oh yeah, my bad. I forgot. You’re my bitch," you turn to look at him, a mischievous smile on your face, which has him playfully rolling his eyes, mumbling something under his breath that you couldn’t quite catch before he took his arm off your shoulder, reached into his pocket, and pulled out a cigarette.
"Let’s go outside," he holds out his hand, which you don’t think twice before intertwining yours with his. You feel giddy as you walk past the crowd holding his hand, as he leads you outside. You hated how many small moments like this had you wanting more from him, knowing this is the most he could ever give you. Jungkook had walls larger than the walls of China. You tried your hardest to stand up on your tiptoes and look. But whenever you got a sneak peek from what's inside, Jungkook built them right back up.
Ever since sophomore year of high school, you had the hugest crush on Jungkook, and you knew deep down he did too, but he never said anything all these years. It was embarrassing how you found yourself waiting for him—you couldn’t help it; your heart basically beat for him.
As you both reach a tall seat wall, before you know it, he's picking you up and placing you on the cold brick wall. Goosebumps appear on your bare thighs while he rubs his warm, calloused hands up and down.
"Cold," you whine, looking down at your angel costume—the white, flowy short skirt, your long white knee-high socks with the tall heels. And don’t forget your lace white top that kept getting tangled with your belly piercing. "I know ways to keep you warm," Jungkook waggles his eyebrows, moving closer to you. You feel his hands on your knees, opening your legs before he steps in between them. The closeness was something you were used to—the cheek kisses, the hand on your thigh, but never this. He was too close to your face—you could feel his warm breath whenever he would breathe. You felt your chest heave as everything you wanted was for him to put his lips on yours. Jungkook's face moved closer in.
You felt your heart stop in your chest almost abruptly. If it wasn't for his face millimeters away from yours, you would think you just had a heart attack.
Your eyelids fluttered closed, waiting for his lips to make contact with yours, but you're met with nothing. Then you feel the warmth of his hand on your thighs disappear, and the same with his body between your legs. You open your eyes to be met with Jungkook lighting up a joint instead of a cigarette. Before you could stop yourself, you pull it out of his mouth with a hard tug.
"What the fuck," Jungkook says, an unreadable expression on his face when he looks at you. "Are you fucking serious?" Your eyebrows furrow as you throw the rolled-up paper somewhere far—jumping down the wall. Your heels click on the pavement as you walk closer to him. The heels didn't do anything for you, as you still had to look up at him to meet his eyes.
"You said you’d stop," your voice cracks like your heart, as you push on his chest.
"It's just weed," Jungkook lets out a sigh, running a hand through his hair. "That's what you said at first then you ended up in my room, high off oxy. So don't tell me it's just weed, Jungkook," you shove him, sending him tumbling backward.
The knock on your window sends your soul leaping out of your body. The sight of your favorite boy outside has your heart beating faster—it's past midnight, so seeing him there sends a different feeling down your body.
“Hi, what are you doing here?” You ask, opening the window to let him climb in. His eyes don’t meet yours as he walks in and sits on your bed, watching you close the window.
“Just wanted to see you,” Jungkook mumbles softly, his voice raspy.
“Well... hi,” you say as you drop beside him on your bed. “Hi,” he says, his eyes avoiding eye contact as he looks down at his twiddling fingers.
“What’s wrong?” You ask, worry picking up as your hand moves to his cheek. His skin is hot under your palm as you move his face to look at you.
The moment his eyes lock with yours, you feel as if the ground disappears beneath you. Jungkook's eyes are unnervingly vacant, the pupils dilated into enlarged black circles.
“What did you take?” Your voice cracks, holding his face in your hands as he slumps into you. “Baby... don’t be mad,” he slurs, his eyes fluttering closed—your hand immediately goes to his heart, finding his heartbeat. This isn’t the first time this has happened; it’s a repeating cycle where he gets high, ends up at your house, and you hear every apology in the book, but it doesn’t mean anything since he’d do it again. The new thing is you don’t yell anymore; instead, you feel the tears start rolling down your face.
“Fuck. Don’t cry. Yell at me, be mad,” Jungkook slurs, trying to reach for you, only for his arm to drop beside him.
“I can’t...” you sob, “why do you do this?” Another sob racks through your body as you pull him into your chest in a hug. His body is limp in your arms.
“Baby... I’m so fucking sorry,” he groans into your chest as you squeeze your eyes shut, trying to calm down. “I love you,” he whispers, and you feel like you can’t breathe as another sob breaks out of you.
“Tell me when you’re sober,” you sniffle, knowing he wouldn’t remember in the morning, laying him down onto your bed and placing the pink covers over his shaking body. You know you’re just feeding into the cycle, but right now all you can do is cry. You prefer him in the safety of your room instead of outside on the streets. So instead, you wrap your arms around him and pray to god he’ll be okay.
“Why do you give a fuck about what I do?” Jungkook scoffs, “it’s none of your business,” he continues, but now it’s your turn to scoff.
“Right, it’s none of my business, asshole,” you throw out.
“You just don’t get it, do you? I’m not good for you,” Jungkook says, his tone much higher than he had anticipated. “I don’t give a fuck, I want you. Don’t you get that,” you frustratedly point your finger into his chest, almost annoyed that he still didn’t get it.
“You want this?” He motions between us, “us fighting all the time, because that’s all we do,” Jungkook scowls, the hard expression on his face has your heart shattering—you almost even hear the cracks as he continues to talk.
“I don’t need you being all up in my business; you’re not my mother,” Jungkook says, letting out a sigh of frustration—rubbing a hand over his face. “I care about you,” you say, looking at him, your voice betraying you as it cracks, again.
“Don’t,” he steps backwards, a shaky laugh escaping him as he avoids meeting your eyes. “Why?” You find yourself asking, making his head snap to look at you.
“Why what?” He asks, brows furrowed as he locks eyes with yours.
“Why did you lead me on then? If you don’t want me,” you ask, wrapping your hands over your waist, feeling vulnerable out in the open as you lay your heart in front of the man you were in love with. He had two choices, break it or carefully pick it up and lock it somewhere safe. You were praying he would pick option two—instead, he decided on the first option.
“What other reason would there be?” Jungkook says, his tone low, stepping closer to you, backing you into the brick wall. Your eyes move to his lips then back to his eyes.
“Maybe because you so easily would open your legs for me. All I have to do is ask,” he spits out. Before you know it, your hand is making contact with his cheek.
“Fuck you,” your teeth clench as you feel a tear stream down your face, “and this is why you shouldn’t want me,” Jungkook clicks his tongue before stepping away from you— a pained expression on his face.
“Fuck, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to do that. Come back,” you hurriedly say as your eyes fill with tears, watching him walk away into the dark street.
#jungkook fanfic#jungkook#bts jungkook#bts fanfic#jungkook fluff#jungkook x reader#jjk#bangtan#fluff#jungkook angst#jungkook imagine#jungkook smut#jeon jungkook#jeongguk x reader#jeongguk fic#jeongguk smut#jeongguk#jeon jk#jeon jungguk#jeon jeongguk#jjk fanfic#jjk x reader#jjk fluff#jjk smut#college au#bts fanfction#bts fluff#bts jk#bts x reader#bts smut
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STEAM | myg ft. jjk
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pairing: boyfriend!yoongi x oc (feat. jungkook)
genre: smut
word count: 9.2k
summary: one video call awakens your neediness for two cocks.
playlist: steam / pinterest board: steam
warnings: female masturbation, mentions of shower sex, praise kink, toying with the idea of polyamory, a hint of voyeurism, oc rly goes through it and faces mental battles, fear, intoxication, punishment, dom/sub dynamics, fingering, choking, cum eating, manhandling, degradation, provocation, mutual masturbation, rough & raw sex, brief oral sex (f. receiving), pet names
note: IT'S FINALLY HEREEEEEE SKFDSFLSFJ, okay so—let me introduce to you a new yoongi series featuring JUNGKOOK oh my god. i am SO EXCITED about this and i wanna apologize for my insane ideas in advance... i'm so sorry, guys. nevertheless, i hope you like this as much as i do, i literally went mad writing this and i smoked so many cigarettes i lost count. please, let me kNOW UR FAVORITE PARTS CUZ I HAVE SO MANY AND I WANNA TALK ABOUT THEM. oh fuck, guys. ENJOY READING SDKFJSD. ⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
side note: btw, the playlist i made is literally perfect and depicts the fic wonderfully. you can listen while you read! <3
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The scent of mangoes finds its way up your nostrils, heating your senses through its balmy touch as you rub the body butter over the damp skin of your arms. Fingers graze along your décolletage, tucking in the fragrance for your boyfriend to breathe in when he comes home. He’s out for the night—said something about his friend finishing his military service, so the whole group was going out to celebrate it. Yoongi was so frantic in his excitement, hastily putting on the first outfit that sparked his eye. Didn’t even touch his hair, only sprayed a mist of his sandalwood and tangerine-tinged perfume. Grabbed his phone, keys, wallet. Barely kissed you goodbye before he fled out of the door.
He didn’t even ask you if you wanted to come along.
You didn’t mind, though—you’re only in the early stages of your relationship. It hasn’t even been half a year since you’ve started dating. And you figure he deserves a night out with his closest friends because you’ve been attached to the hip since the beginning. Funnily enough, you no longer live at your own place. Somehow, you’ve settled in Yoongi’s apartment, never setting foot outside, save for your walks, grocery shopping, the few dates with your friends and work. There wasn’t any conversation about it; you just mostly spend your free time with your boyfriend.
And all you do is fuck, eat and watch movies.
The last time Yoongi took you out was during the first two months you’d been getting to know him. The realization of how long it’s been sends a trail of chills down your arms and you rub it away.
But because you’ve been spending all your time together, you’re glad to have a moment to yourself—glad to be able to take a long hot shower, to do your hair and skincare. Perhaps, you’ll even have time to do your nails and that energizes you, propels you to spread the body butter further down the rest of your body. It is your rose garden, these night times reserved for your hot showers. The place you go to—your hideaway from the pressure and nerves of life that the steam loosens and soothes, especially when you let your sultry playlist echo through the mightiness of Yoongi’s bathroom, your favorite singer’s voice reaching your veins like the growing stems of those roses; pretty, pink and so feminine. Yes, Yoongi’s therapy sessions and thick length might have been a great help, the best in fact, but there’s something about letting yourself be burned off of all that’s been weighing you down and watching it trickle down the drain that is just so satisfying.
It was all that you were once used to. That is, until you met Yoongi.
Showers with him are something else.
Something you never thought you could ever have the blessing to encounter. Showers with Yoongi are intense, so out of pocket that you find yourself thinking about them fondly whenever you’re alone with your thoughts. There, beneath the downpour of the warm water, he lets you see the other side of his ever unyielding stern façade. While holding you, he would make you laugh, then make you moan and break that sound with each hard plunge of his cock. Hair slicked back, smirk adorning that delicious wet mouth, causing him to look like a Mafioso bent on absolutely ruining you. He would tell you the most insane story he heard from his friend, then talk you through the build-up of your orgasm while continuing to the point of that story—seamlessly waving through, never losing tempo. “Then, he went up to his hyung to ask him about what he did—yes, just like that, honey, take it. I know you’re almost there, just listen.” You would come all over his cock, sprinkling him with your essence, right there at the end of his story and like a hungry man, he’d get on his knees and eat you up, muttering how good you are and how well you did along with each swipe of his tongue. Your lungs would heave due to the overstimulation, your legs would tremble, unable to stand and he’d gather you into his arms, fold you like paper into the crooks of his body and let his thick duvet drape over you. He’d fall asleep first, breathing in the scent of your shampoo, snoring softly behind you while spooning you, never letting go of his deathly grip around you. And while you would breathe in the haze of lilac sprayed on his pillows, you’d become aware of the drowsy rhythm of his heartbeat, the lift and fall of his chest against your back, the snug heat of his body and it would lull you to sleep.
That has become your new version of hot long showers.
And if it isn’t this, then it’s Yoongi letting you quickly wash yourself before he’d steal you away, dragging you into this bed, only to carry you back there an hour later.
You speculate he has a serious, adorable case of attachment issues.
That is why you enjoy your exceptional alone shower all the more—you haven’t had it in so long. Only this time, it’s quite different.
You feel him everywhere.
You feel him in the drift of your hand down your tummy because you recollect the way he likes to pepper kisses there on his way to eat you out. You feel him when you round your palms across your backside because you know he particularly likes to leave traces of saliva when he presses open-mouthed kisses there. His love for you circulates in your bloodstream, mingling with the little love you have for yourself, making it bigger, turning it into a turbulent rush of liquid. You sense it tapping beneath your skin, asking for more of your body just like Yoongi does, always begging, begging for more—for more skin to kiss and lick, for more sensitive parts of you to find and nibble on.
Your hands sense the ghost of him even when your fingers slip past your mound and realize that the film of your memories dampened your cunt. You hear the words of praise he’d utter into your ear at the discovery and you sigh at your tender touch.
That’s a good girl. Messy for me.
The rotund case of your body butter remains opened, forgotten. You suddenly have better things to do—like give your body the self-care, the self-love it deserves.
It’s a part of the solo girl's night.
A mewl comes out of your mouth at the first round of circles on your clit. Furrowing your brows at the pleasure, you prop your free hand on the edge of the bathroom counter, riding the pads of your fingers. And then, just like Yoongi taught you, you take your digits away, edging yourself, taking them elsewhere. You cry out at the contact of your wet fingertips on your stiff nipple and you pinch the nub, a spasm of delight coursing through your sensitiveness.
You imagine Yoongi standing behind you. Not touching you, merely guiding you, telling you when to stop, when to pick up the pace—when to fill your hole. Watching you in the mirror, hands in his pockets, having a perfect view of your slick-caked folds, of your clit swollen and asking for his tongue. Determined to make you lose your mind by teasing you, letting you only slap your pussy once you’re close. Your essence drips out of you at that thought, making a mess on the floor and you plug it in with your finger, fucking yourself steadily, inflamed by how slippery your heat is, how easy it is to slip the digit inside. Hot flashes close over your body, pearls of perspiration kissing the crook of your neck. You fuck yourself faster and—
A sudden ring of your phone jolts you. And the picture of your boyfriend, half dressed, with the early morning sunlight leaking over the scars and tattoo on his shoulder, crammed inside your screen, greets you.
You pant hard, your finger still inside of you. Delirious.
He must be on his way home. You don’t even know what time it is.
Leaning forward, you hide your breasts behind your forearm and you swipe your finger to accept his video call.
Blurry Yoongi. The night sky, starlit and alive, behind him. A shoal of silhouettes, some lanky and some buff, all short-haired and all as woozy-lidded as you. The picture smooths into a crystal clear view and there you see your boyfriend, the nocturnal breeze brushing his ebony hair back. Not just him, however, but another male craning his neck to regard you fully.
His eyes flicking from your neck to the smallest of your exposed décolletage, a smirk blossoming on his face like your imaginary roses.
Yoongi slaps his phone face down. You withdraw your finger from your heat, a cacophony of giggles, whiny cries and the exclamations of his name emitting out of your mouth.
He is not, in fact, on his way home.
It is a warning, his low and strict call of your name back and, heeding it, you take your phone into your hands, so he’s only able to see your deeply flushed face. Device back in his hand, he’s not looking at you at all. As a matter of fact, he’s shooting daggers fueled with deadly nightshade at his friend, grumbling something that you can’t quite make out amidst the chaos and bustle of the outing. The shoal of the rest of his friends and strangers disappear out of the perspective, as if threatened by the cold energy.
You wish you knew what he’s saying to him. Even your pussy aches to hear it. The principle of him scolding his friend for looking at you at your most private moment scorches you and you’re red, flattered and majestically horny.
Yoongi turns his head to see if you’re well-behaved and you beam at him, the pulse on your clit intensifying, forcing you to say, “come home, Yoongi.”
He chuckles, aware of the reason behind your words, pretends he isn’t. “What were you doing, baby?”
The growth of your grin doesn’t falter. You show him the sheen of your wet finger in the ivory bathroom light, the glint, the stickiness as you push your index finger to your middle and pull away, your arousal on full, filthy display.
He curses under his breath. Doesn’t give a fuck that his friend sits beside him and adjusts in his seat. Bites his lip briefly. “Stick it in your mouth for me.”
Doesn’t say the words that so very often follow after in that sentence. Taste yourself.
Why he doesn’t step aside to take this video call eludes you, but something about you being watched by two pairs of eyes excites you. Enough for you to do as he says. Perhaps it’s due to the fact you don’t know the male sitting beside him and Yoongi is letting him keep his sight glued to the screen.
Two sharp inhales of breath. Not one of yours. Yoongi readies his hook to feignedly lash out at his friend and you press your thighs together to alleviate yourself of the unbearable feeling between your legs. Confidence, a bad, bad version of confidence suffuses you whole, turning you into a person gone mad by lust. You swirl your tongue around your digit, the tanginess of your taste causing your eyes to narrow, the principle of driving not just one, but two men mad just the same intoxicates you, as if you were there among them, drinking.
A pair of round eyes peek at the corner of the screen. Soft, naive, so terribly innocent. A dash of sobriety washes over you, owed to those brownish effervescent orbs, a sprinkle shame pooling low in your core. A reality check. You sense some kind of stability of that reality beneath those eyelashes of his, the stability that whispers—is this the right thing to do?
It’s not rough, it’s not stern, it’s not Yoongi coded—it’s anything but. Gentleness is what you detect, free of any prejudice.
You sigh. Millions of thoughts about how you could toy with them pass through your mind, but you decide against them, the stability a pillar that blends into your spine, helping it unbend. You can’t do this; you can’t do this to Yoongi and you need to keep your dignity intact in some way, despite the fact that every fiber of your body compels you to do the opposite. You distract yourself by screwing the lid of your body butter back on.
“Good girl,” Yoongi coos, causing you to whisk your eyes to the screen in perhaps disbelief, shame or your still pending arousal—you’re not sure. How can you be a good girl when you let another man see something so lewd? How can your boyfriend validate something like that? “One more beer and I’ll be home. Wait for me on the bed. As you are.”
Naked.
Heat rushes to your cheeks, to the surface of every part of your skin, dragging away small ounces of shame. You curse, mentally, running a hand down your face. Yoongi downs his drink without taking his gaze off of you, watching your reaction, adds once he swallows, “and don’t touch yourself.”
And with that, he hangs up.
The harsh comprehension of what the fuck just happened envelops you in a confining embrace, the precipitately increasing weight of shame now a burden on your shoulders that you just can’t shake off, even when you slink your arms through sleeves of your silky robe and welcome in the summer breeze coming to caress your face on the balcony—even when you burst your lighter to a flame and light up your cigarette, inhaling the smoke that you hoped would rid you of its such uncomfortable hold around you.
You licked your cum clean under the gape of a guy you don’t know in front of your boyfriend.
His friend heard the order. Don’t touch yourself. Yoongi didn’t whisper it. Didn’t camouflage his words in any way. Uttered them straight and bare, allowing his friend to hear them, despite the fact he almost fought him then and there for sneaking one glance at your moderately naked form.
Question marks hover in your mind and the pulse on your clit cries, seemingly knowing the answer.
Did Yoongi like it as much as you did, the aspect of having an audience?
The wetness in your heat dribbles out, staining your thighs. You squeeze them together, the drag of your cigarette hard and long, expecting to feel your nerves burn off. You gain no such thing—no relief, no lifting of the burden, just constricting tangles in your tummy, zippy spasms of butterflies going mad, mad, mad.
Perhaps Yoongi didn’t like it at first until he perceived the auspicious debauched look on your face. Saw the way you didn’t hesitate to oblige him when he told you to stick your finger in your mouth. And perhaps the fact that you didn’t express any signal of discomfort was the key to unfastening the leash on his possessiveness over you.
What have you done? What have you so selfishly and disgustingly done?
You hang your head in your hands, the white smoke intertwining with the burden on your shoulders and pressing down harder on you.
That’s why he let his friend hear the command. Don’t touch yourself. He saw the way you indulged in it, and that awakened his liking for it.
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Yoongi lied when he said he’d have one more beer.
By the time you hear the thunder of his voice, all the roses in your garden have wilted, leaving faded, withered petals in its wake—leaving a path of your internal battle all around the apartment for Yoongi to follow. You’ve paced, your bare feet stepping on them. Tried to untangle yourself from the incarceration of your mind by chain-smoking, but to no avail. The only change that took place in your body was the decline of your shame, for you couldn’t help but imagine what could have happened, had you let free rein to your desire—had those round eyes never looked at you with such purity. You figured there wasn’t anything bad about letting your imagination be colored like that, and so you sat on your boyfriend’s couch, cigarette switched to a coconut-flavored vape, and dreamed.
You dreamed about those two men being of service to you, right here on the same couch, where they would lay you down and make you squirt over and over again, betting between each other who could make you come the fastest, counting down your orgasms until the number was a mere blur to you.
The throb on your clit heightened to heavenly levels and when you emerged from your dream, you found yourself being able to breathe—your momentary disappearance tricking your shame into leaving. It was difficult for you not to touch yourself and you opted to adhere to Yoongi’s wish, not risking to feel worse than you already had.
The war ended, undeterred by the fact you never expected it to.
Loud swear words roar in Korean. You rise to your feet to open the front door for Yoongi and you discover that he’s not alone at all.
The same pair of round eyes, the cause of all the ruckus you just departed from, meet yours, hauling you back there with a force. Your mouth falls agape and before you can react any further, Yoongi stumbles into you. You almost topple over, realizing you didn’t care to steal a glance at the state of him, but the male grabs a hold of Yoongi’s jacket and pulls him back. You wish you had tumbled over and the floor had opened up and swallowed you whole. It would have been less embarrassing than to be stuck in this situation. You want to run, you want to scream—
“He’s drunk out of his own mind,” the male says, his voice deep like the warm wind before a tumultuous storm, fitting just right with the thunder of Yoongi’s intonation, his gaze wandering over the entirety of your shock-stricken face, taking it in; giving you the same attention that fucked you up hours ago. Yoongi begins to mumble something you can’t momentarily focus on, his hands grasping your waist, lips latching onto your neck. No, you cannot for the life of you focus because the man steals you all over again and you hate how easy it is for him to do that, when you’re far from being available. “Don’t ask what made him drink this much.”
Did Yoongi get drunk because he let his friend in on your most intimate moment?
Humiliated, turned on and angry altogether, a concoction that simply worsens everything, you draw back from your boyfriend. You want to beat at his chest with your fists just to have some sort of relief from blaming him—because if you blame yourself, only doom consumes you. Why did he call you? Or, essentially, why didn’t he step away to take that damned video call?
“Thanks for walking him home,” you say eventually, your voice smooth, despite the violence of your feelings, despite wanting to say something else entirely. Your first words to him and, wholeheartedly—despite it all, you hope they aren’t last, even if that possibly makes you a despicable person.
Yoongi’s friend nods. Chews his bottom lip and lowers his gaze to the ground for a split second. You wonder if he feels the need to remove himself from this uncomfortable situation as much as you do because you can’t read anything in that paleness of his countenance. Not a hint of any emotion whatsoever, just blandness of expression, slightly dimmed by the few thick strands of black hair that have fallen from his disheveled, pushed back mullet. As if they did fight after all, perhaps on the way home, or wrestled if Yoongi was being difficult.
You don’t realize you and the male are just staring at each other until Yoongi places his hand on your cheek, brushing back a wisp of your tresses. Only then do your eyes flick to Yoongi’s and you finally notice him, the gloss in his hooded irises searching and searching for you, the rosy blush on his cheeks, dry parted mouth and the dart of his tongue as he wets it, softening the flecks that have been created there.
This is it. If you are focused on him, all things are made right—all things that have been stained get purified and dreams get turned into dust. This is the man you’ve fallen for, who puts you before himself and has done so every day since the moment he made you his. You can’t let anyone else get in the way of the home that your relationship has become, you can’t let your feelings flee—
“For the record,” Yoongi’s friend starts, hand massaging circles on the nape of his neck, the leather of his jacket tight around his arm. Your heart jumps and beats against your chest ferociously. “I didn’t see anything, if that helps you sleep better tonight.”
It’s such a fat lie and you’re about to shake your head, but then he looks at you with such sincere regret that, ultimately, you choose to believe him. Just to keep your peace of mind unscarred.
Yoongi tightens his hold around your waist, which grounds you, and a small part of you begins to bloom in healing, disseminating little by little across your whole body.
A healer with big, round eyes. A good man.
With a swing, Yoongi closes the door but you don’t hear the click. No, the light spills in from the hallway. Your hands reach for the doorknob but Yoongi blocks them and wraps them around his waist while swaying on his feet. He traces the shell of your ear with his lips, his alcohol-reeking breath wafting over you, and softly, you whine his name. Shuffling beyond the door, feet never entirely moving—the male is still standing outside and he hears as Yoongi hums at your call, as the sound grows into a groan at the feeling of being alone with you at last, at the feeling of all that makes you feminine under his hands. He hears your gasp as Yoongi pushes your chest flush to his body, kisses you harshly and cups your bare pussy. Hears the smack of your mouths, the pop once he withdraws, the squelch of your wetness. Hears as Yoongi murmurs, “you been horny, baby? Wet for me, hm?”
It’s those words that make him shut the door for you.
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You made Yoongi drink a lot of water.
And while he downed the glasses, you ordered him Thai food from his phone, which he now devours. You had wanted to change out of your flimsy robe into your plush pajamas, but Yoongi stopped you with a tight grip on your shoulder and with the nastiest puppy eyes he could manage, considering his plastered state, he begged you not to. Informed you that he wanted to fuck you in your little robe and you told him that if he wanted that, he needed to get sober.
He’s your boyfriend and you trust him, but you don’t feel comfortable having sex with him while he’s wasted and you’re not. It’s a dangerous territory you don’t ever want to cross.
So, now he eats as quietly as a mouse, feeding you every other bite with his chopsticks, meanwhile you’re jittering your leg with your arms crossed across your chest, mind full of the male who walked him home. Of the way he pulled you under and resurfaced with you soon after. Of the calm peace you feel all over the perimeter of your mind that peculiarly stresses you out. Of what would happen if you voiced your little dream to Yoongi, especially.
Was it out of the question or would he consider it?
Your leg jitters harder.
You want to tell him, badly. Seeing his friend in real life changed fucking everything. If you hadn’t, you would’ve forgotten about it in the days to come. Yoongi would’ve fucked it out of you in most probability. But those eyes… those eyes got under your skin.
“Stop fidgeting,” Yoongi scolds with his mouth full of food, no hint of slurring. The hot meal and hydration worked a miracle. “You’re making me nervous.”
He picks up two cut pieces of chicken with his chopsticks and stuffs your mouth, adding a few pieces of vegetables as you’re chewing. Watches you swallow it, noticing how your eyes are focused on nothing in particular on the other side of the room. Tucking his utensils under his palm, he places his hand on your thigh, halting your restless motion.
You still won’t look at him. Too lost in the overthinking maze, debating whether you should speak or remain quiet about your desire. A strong part of you fears his reaction and the other half is horrified at the possibility of being turned down—
Yoongi takes his hand away. Props it on his cheek.
“I can see your pussy from here,” he says, licking his lips. “You’ve shaved?”
You breathe a soft laugh, turning your head to face him, covering yourself with the small fabric. Dark, but tender eyes, void of any glossiness, awake and stirred—amused. Cheeks awash with color. Lips puffy, a dark tinge of red coating them. A sturdy fist on his cheek, the milky jawline underneath. That messy hair, the slicked-back look ruined by the constant rake of his fingers through them, now falling to the side from the middle. That slender body, clad in the night from head to toe—legs outstretched under the table. So fine, so delicious. A beautiful strong man—all yours. Why do you want another one?
You slide your leg across his thighs and Yoongi slouches in his seat, discarding his chopsticks.
“I shaved everything,” you respond, cocking your brow at him—a sly invitation for him to feel its smoothness.
And he does. Runs his hand up and down your skin. Goes as far as lifting your other leg onto his lap, cradling them both, thumb caressing your calf. The movement causes your robe to expose you again and, cursing the fabric, you go to cover yourself, but Yoongi stops you.
“Don’t bother,” he mutters. “I wanna look at it.”
You raise your brows altogether, looking up at him. “You wanna look at her?”
Yoongi smirks. That dangerous tug of one corner of his mouth to the side. Your death, your undoing, the root of your submission to him. “I want to have her at my disposal.”
You gulp and Yoongi catches it, chuckling. Drifts his hand down your calf, to your heel, to the middle of your foot up to your toes. He plays with your pinky. You note the fact he changed the pronoun after you did.
Your arousal returns at full speed.
“Did that make you wet?” Low, low is his voice—you feel it prodding at your core, thrumming vehemently.
You blossom like your roses, thoughts put to the side.
“I’ve been wet this entire time,” you say, zeroing in your gaze on the flick of dimness that whirls past his eyes. “For hours.”
He makes a sound of pitiful nature. “Poor baby.” Furrows his brows and juts his bottom lip out, making you weak. Lets his hand roam on your thigh. “So you listened? You didn’t touch yourself?”
You merely nod your head quickly. You were too distressed to give your body the pleasure it sought. Too busy flaring your lungs with the burn of smoke. And you respected his wish enough to keep your hands to yourself.
Yoongi coos. “Good girl.”
A flashback—your lips wrapping around your slick-coated finger, Yoongi praising you and… another pair of eyes watching. Chills spread across your arms, your stomach flipping. Thankfully, your shame is kept at bay. It relieves you.
“Can I feel how wet you are?”
A sweet, devious smile. “If you can manage to get to her.”
You press your thighs tightly together. Yoongi looks at you as if you’ve greatly offended him and alas, he turns your chair so you face him head-on. Forces your thighs apart without any strain at all—and there you feel it, the embarrassment of fucking with him, once your pussy is at complete disposal to him just like he wanted.
“If your pussy wasn’t so pretty, I’d make you regret your words,” he purrs, eyes fixed on your drenched flesh, hands pushing your thighs back until your knees are at level with your shoulders, folds parting with the movement, revealing more of you. Yoongi wets his mouth with his tongue.
He thumbs your gleaming lips back and forth, collecting your essence, mesmerized by them. Looks at you intently.
“It wouldn’t hurt to say sorry, though,” he says, narrowing his eyes at you. “Would it?”
You grin at him. “Sorry, Yoongi.”
He rubs your swollen clit in slow circles, still with his bedewed thumb, still with his eyes on you. You choke out a moan at the delight permeating through your being. “That’s not the proper way to apologize, now is it?”
You lean your pelvis into his touch, a natural body reaction unfolding. He disapproves. You scrunch your face. “What should I say?”
Yoongi tuts. “I’m barely touching you and you already forgot your manners?”
The only answer you emit is an uncouth whine.
He shakes his head, putting pressure into his circles for a mere beat of time before he slaps your pussy curtly. A vivid spasm of pleasure fills you and you moan. “Needy girl. Don’t I take care of this pussy enough? What’s this behavior?”
Another whine. A roll of your body, asking for more of his touch. “Spank her again.”
A cock of his brow. Harsh, stern, evil. His hand remains propped on his thigh, shoulders hunched. “I didn’t hear you say please. You wanna be bad? You want me to make you cry?”
You know just how much he’s capable of doing that. You shake your head ‘no’. You want gentleness, the kind you saw in his friend’s eyes—
You flutter your own shut to get rid of that thought. Take a deep breath.
“Spank my pussy again, please.”
Yoongi massages the apex of your thigh, dangerously close to your cunt, squeezing the flesh every once in a while.
“Apologize first.”
“You didn’t tell me how.”
He clicks his tongue and pinches your folds and your clit between his fingers. You cry out, and then Yoongi gets up to his feet, leaning over you, propping his hand on the back of your chair. He begins to swiftly spank your pussy over and over again. You just jump at every contact, moaning, eyes flicked to his, never breaking apart. Taking it, taking it so well that Yoongi kisses you nastily, licking into your mouth. Then, he grunts. Fingers flat against your clit, he moves them from side to side. Roses, a myriad of them, flood your form with their freshness and dewiness, with their beauty and delectation and you shudder, you scream, you arch your back off of the backrest—
“Say, ‘I’m sorry, Yoongi. I’m such a bad girl that I deserve every spank and I’ll take it until it hurts.”
Flabbergasted and horny beyond measure, your mouth falls agape. Your brain turns into mush, the pleasure paralyzing you, your sounds now loud and obscene, the roses in you flitting, growing and murmuring. Yoongi adds more pressure to your clit and your eyes sink back into your head, his darkness wafting over to you, seeping into your skin—now completely yours.
You repeat after him—word for word. With a simper on your face that causes him to scowl at you, as if you dared to toy with your punishment he bestowed upon you. But then, a tongue prods the inside of his cheek and he laughs, taking a hold of his dominant role and making sure you know. He spanks your clit twice in a row, hands lifting to fondle your nipples.
“Good,” he praises. “You like that, don’t you? Spanks on your pussy?”
You don’t like that softness. Like the personified thunder he is, it is the calm before the storm. It unnerves you, the expectation of what might come next and your disliking of it. Nonetheless, you brim with the craving to have his fingers inside of you. Your hole clenches at that and Yoongi notices, hissing under his breath. The language of the darkness rises on your tongue and you figure that if you let loose, you’ll get your wish fulfilled.
“Yeah, it feels so good—” He pinches your nipples between his knuckles and you mewl, your lashes shaking at the impact, another set of wetness coating your folds. “Please, fuck me with your fi—”
You don’t even get to finish your sentence. Yoongi plunges his middle finger into your heat, cursing at your tightness, at how slippery you are and at the delight of being filled at last, you knit your brows. With his other finger, he traces the outline of your puckered mouth, his breathing hard and ragged.
“I’ll do anything for that pout of yours, fuck, no matter if you deserve it or not,” he utters, slipping the digit inside. Instinctively, you suck on it and only then does Yoongi begin to pump you slowly. “You just need a little roughness to be good, don’t you?”
Dumbly, you nod, swirling your tongue around him, but a faint, silenced part of you begs for the gentleness that you know hides somewhere deep inside his chest, never once unfurled during such intimate times.
You pay it no matter, too fucked out to think.
When he adds a second finger into your heat, he does the same thing with his other hand. Two fingers in your cunt, two fingers in your mouth. And he fucks you with both until you gag and a light flashes in his eyes—then, he withdraws all together, leaning against the table, his bedewed fingers coming to rest at his hardened length in his pants.
Roses, opening. Roses, sighing.
You breathe heavily, needing to finish, needing to have him in your mouth—
“You liked being the center of attention today?” he husks, surveying your whole body, bent in half.
There it is—the storm. Just what you expected. Cold sweat dribbles down your spine. And it is fear, what you feel, even when you refuse to admit it. Stiff, tempered fear that pervades each and every vein on your body, regarding being possibly degraded, being made feel dirty—regarding, even, tasting the dark wine of his wrath.
Such a stark, sudden change.
You don’t want this. You don’t want any of it.
Abruptly, an internal question comes and pokes you in the middle of your forehead.
Will you succumb to it or will you, with the wildly fresh darkness within you, fight against it?
You take a deep breath, and in with the air also follows, with the little rationality you have amidst the sensuality of your lecherous appetite, the decision to take a hold of it all. To take charge. Just like he did.
You shall prioritize yourself. Your feelings, your desires—your roses.
Your choice envelops your fear in bubble wrap. It doesn’t dissipate. And as much as it pains you, you take a mental note of that.
“I did,” you spit out, angered by the fact you’re afraid of your boyfriend, and so you stand your ground. “It made me so fucking needy and I want more.”
The relief that hits you almost causes you to weep and you lower your legs to the ground. Not wanting him to see the film of tears clouding your eyes, you avoid his gaze. Yoongi crosses his arms across his chest and clicks his tongue at you, disapproving.
“Keep your legs where they belong.”
“No.”
A lift of his brow. He crouches down to your level and cradles your face in his hand, forcing you to look at him. And there he sees, under the waterfall of your hair, your emotions at his disposal. Yoongi studies you, frowns at you and you want to sob, you want to go home. Shame slithers towards your spine like a ghost, and although it keeps a distance, you feel its presence prickling your back. You cover your cleavage.
“Why are you crying?” Yoongi asks, a silky murmur, eyes flicking between yours. His fingers don’t caress your skin; they merely hold you firmly, making dents in the skin.
You don’t trust that voice, dismayed by what might lie under.
“Why did you do that to me?” you ask in return, and it’s a blue fire shooting out, engulfing the room in stifling heat. You catch a glimpse of its sparks in the dimness of his eyes, of how he’s momentarily stricken by it before it folds beneath the shadows.
“You want to get fucked by someone else?”
A question for a question.
You swallow down the lump in your throat, caused by your frustration.
Your devotion to him didn’t let you go as far as to imagine being fucked by his friend while Yoongi watched, but the brief flash of it in your mind is enough incentive for the heat to spill into you, mingling with the darkness, turning you candescent, traveling through you until it finds your core—and there, it stays. There, it finds home.
The pulse on your clit returns, filling you with abrupt energy.
There’s something about him coming up with it that makes you unhinged, but you’re so utterly sick of the instability of your feelings. You need it to stop.
“And what if I do?” you retort. “What will you do?”
Truthfulness, at last.
Yoongi takes in a sharp inhale of breath, and that is the only reaction you receive from him. Nothing else on his face flickers; no wrath, no sliver of jealousy, not one thing. You stare at an empty canvas, ready for you to paint on. And you simply decide that you want to start.
You push his hand away from your face. Stand up to your feet. But the hardened look he gives you inclines you to sit back down.
You fight against it.
Untangling the knot on your robe, you let him see your bare femininity. The perkiness of your breasts, the long dip of your stomach that he likes to pepper kisses on. Yes, you’re aiming for his weakness.
And you decide to repeat history.
You reach your hand down, lower and lower while he stares you down, and you collect your glimmering essence. Sinking your finger into your mouth, you make a show of rolling your eyes back and moaning faintly, softly. Your other hand, in the meantime, unbuttons his pants.
The breath Yoongi inhaled hitches in his throat.
“Is this not evidence enough?” you purr, dragging down his zipper. “How else am I supposed to show you?”
You pull his manhood out as you suck on your finger, all while maintaining eye contact. You don’t touch him beyond that. In fact, you withdraw your hand altogether.
And then, you collect your essence again.
This time, you smear it across his bottom lip. Yoongi lets you. Your heart thuds, threatening to jump out of your chest.
“Your actions during the video call told me everything,” you whisper, catching the sliver of wooziness scattering along his narrowed eyes. “And I think you liked it more than me—the thought of sharing me. You can’t hide it. Not when I saw it.”
Yoongi growls. Then, he surprises you.
He parts his lips for you.
And the contact of the pad of your finger with his wet tongue coaxes a string of your dewiness to drip down the side of your thigh. You moan for him. Relieved, fucked up, woozy just the same. Finally, finally, finally.
You’re in charge. And it feels divine.
His length twitches against the fabric of his T-shirt. Long, hard, drooling. Such a delight for you—and so you continue.
“I also think it made you hard. Not just because you called me when I was touching myself, but because your friend was right there beside you,” you purr, your voice a seductive sound of silk—leading him to wrap his lips around your digit. You moan for him, showing him how much you like that. “Isn’t that right, baby?” Your walls clench at the pet name, solely due to the fact that these soft terms of endearment have always been addressed to you, never the other way around. It thrills you. “I’d always be devoted to you, even if he fucked me. I’d look at you the entire time. If that’s what you want. I had a different idea, but yours is just—” you pause, and again you make a show of sighing and rolling your eyes back, “better.”
A straight hit to his core. A glee for you.
But you don’t realize how much you fucked up until Yoongi grips your waist and the hold hurts enough that you wince.
And then—then he manhandles you.
Lifting you and laying you down on the table, Yoongi spreads your legs. Watches you drip, watches as the satiny fabric follows the movement of your limbs and reveals you in all your entirety. He pulls you closer to him with a sharp tug until you collide with the tops of his thighs. Bends over you. Hovers his lips above yours. You expect him to kiss you—he even angles his head and rubs the side of his nose against yours—but he never does.
He only leaves you waiting. Leaves you submitted to your empty expectations, taking charge, taking his control back from you. You shiver in anticipation, reaching for him, however he pins your hands down on either side of you. An angel in a rose garden.
Yoongi chuckles, darkly, his teeth glinting in the yellow light. You fight against his hold, hips rolling against the underside of his length, beckoning him to do something, anything. You merely manage to prolong the thunder of his laughter.
“One cock isn’t enough for her, so baby wants two,” he spits. That smirk, the crinkles around his eyes—he’s enjoying this. The hint of degradation doesn’t reflect what’s swarming inside of him, doesn’t reflect the face of pleasure coursing down his body. You smile and he scoffs. “I have enough friends for you to choose from in case you want more. I think you’d be stellar at taking three cocks. Four, even, huh? Would you have enough then? One in your tight little virgin ass, two in your cunt, one down your throat?”
You gulp, frozen, eyes widening.
Yoongi bites his shiny lips, nudging the tip of his nose against yours. Kisses you once. Begins to rock his hips, his length sliding across your wet fleshiness. The moan that escapes your throat trembles with each delicious motion.
“You watch too much porn, honey,” he coos, giving you tiny kisses on the mouth. “I’d kill anyone who would come near this pussy. And I’d kill Jungkook, too, if he so much as glanced at her.”
So that’s his name. You mewl, knitting your brows. That’s his pretty name. The entirety of your form shivers at the discovery, at the pleasure given to your throbbing clit.
Yoongi pulls back, setting your hands free.
You prop your elbows on the table, pouting. Yoongi grasps his length, spreads his arousal and begins to jerk himself off.
“You’re not fucking Jungkook. You’re mine.” He groans, squeezing his tip; your hole clenches. “Rub your clit.”
Like him, you spread your arousal on your seashell, the arousal long caused by his presence and now the mention of his name—the reason behind your frustration and his, the reason why you’re spread on the dining table, why your boyfriend is hard. You rub your clit from side to side, amused.
“No,” Yoongi disapproves, knowing you do the motion when you want to prolong the build-up. “Circles. Make yourself come.”
You change direction, obeying him. A sly grin blossoms on your lips, dark eyes looking up into his, permeating them, permeating into his soul. You pick up the pace, moaning into your expression of elation.
“Jungkook is such a pretty name,” you provoke and you heighten your sounds in volume and intensity just to piss him off, just to have your way.
A grunt escapes him, matching your pace. He wraps his fingers around your throat and squeezes. You hum.
“A pretty name to moan in my opinion.” A layer of sweat coats your body. Yoongi grasps your jawline firmly and your satisfied laughter inches you closer to your orgasm. You feel the hot flashes, roses surrounding you—its tender petals grazing your feverish skin. You give in, watching Yoongi do the same, his mouth in a tight line, hissing and sizzling, an open fire, an open fire you want to be radiated by, burned whole by. “Just imagine him here, watching us. Oh my god, imagine him knowing he’s the reason why you and I are doing this.”
Yoongi has had enough.
He pushes you down harshly. Fills your hole to the hilt without letting you adjust, observing himself disappearing inside of you and begins to pound you into the table. The sound of skin slapping, the hard and quick strokes, the ravaged grunts he lets out, the fast change—it all takes your breath away, so much that you can’t, in fact, breathe. He grabs your face and makes you look at him. The dead of the night captured in his features, you absorb it, whining like the brat you are onto his mouth, mingling into your noises your approval, your yes’.
Swallowing it, he kisses you, keeping his eyes open. “He could never fuck you like this.”
You laugh. He swallows that, too, moaning. “What if he could?”
He taps you on the cheek, a warning, giving you an exceptionally hard stroke that causes you to scream. He pauses. Does it again. Over and over—and your screams echo across the room, your own soul slipping out of your body. Petals flutter against you and you’re done for, hanging off the edge. You’re close, so terribly close. Your eyesight blurs and Yoongi pulls out entirely and rams into you. Again and again, abusing your cervix.
You moan his name, gone—entirely gone.
“Yes, moan my name like that. Just mine,” he mutters. “Who’s fucking you this good? Who’s gonna make you come?”
He rams into you more rapidly than before. Your senses leave you until all that you know is Yoongi. His name, his scent, the wholeness of the night encompassing him.
“You, Yoongi, you. Fuck, I—”
Yoongi laughs maniacally. “Yes, that’s right. That’s my good girl.”
He rolls his hips, slowing down the coming of your orgasm, owning you. Lets your senses come back to you momentarily. You swallow, your throat dry and you blink, dazed still. Yoongi kisses you, giving you all that he took from you.
“Who’s only capable of fucking you like this, honey, hm?” he asks, his voice tender and sing-song. “My pretty honey, so fucked out. So out of it.”
You whine and you don’t control what comes out of you, your body answering for you. “You, Yoongi. You’re fucking me so—so good. I can’t—fuck. You’re the only one.”
He smiles down at you fondly, kissing your nose, then your lips, parting your mouth and swirling his tongue around yours briefly. Then he withdraws, begins to fuck you again, slowly, reaching to the side for something.
Once you see his phone in his hand, your heart stops. And when he puts the device to his ear, your throat dries up even more. You suddenly become aware of the silence all around, especially in your chest. You can’t breathe, you can’t blink—
Yoongi jackhammers into you, purposefully luring your loud noises out of you. “My girlfriend wants to fuck you.”
You gasp, squeezing your eyes shut, the suddenness, the quickness of pleasure you haven’t yet felt piercing you. Fuck hot flashes and petals, you feel a heavy urge of your orgasm closing down on you.
“She’s so desperate for you, even when I’m fucking the life out of her.”
You flutter your eyes open to see Yoongi surveying you. You scrunch your face—so close, so fucking close—and then he puts the phone to your ear. Breathing, hard, ragged breathing fills all of your senses and you come.
It’s an explosion. Roses bursting, their dew soaking you and Yoongi whole and you exit. You exit out of this situation, this world, this universe while your soul remains here with them. Vibrancy, colors so beautiful and sensations so vivid, ardent and fierce. You don’t know what it is you’re feeling or where you are. That is, until Yoongi’s voice yanks you back to planet Earth, back into this world, this situation—back to them.
“In fact, she just came for you. Squirted.”
You sob. Overstimulated, rhapsodic, but effulgent. Yes, you emit light and glow. You can see it in Yoongi’s softened eyes.
“Think about it. No pressure. Just know she won’t shut up about you. I recall her saying your name would be pretty to moan while she played with her pussy. I think it’s only right you fuck it out of her.”
With that, he hangs up.
You brim with so many emotions that it numbs you. Happy tears flow out of your tear ducts—and happily, endearingly, Yoongi chortles. You don’t even feel humiliation or shame. On the contrary, you’re ready to come again.
Yoongi kisses you and the sounds he slips into your mouth divulge how happy he is about this, how pleased he is with himself.
You pout, burning your eyesight into his. He begins to rut into you.
“What, you’re not even gonna thank me?” he says, grinning, as if he wasn’t fucking you at all, as if you two were still sitting at the dinner table, conversing.
You stammer, head empty, silencing yourself and trying again. “What—what made you change your mind?”
Yoongi places open-mouthed, wet kisses along the bone of your jaw, and there he seals his answer. “I made up my mind the moment you admitted you wanted to be fucked by him, but you wouldn’t shut up about him. I wanted to hear you babble for me. About me. I just had to mess you up to get to that point.”
You mewl, running your hands through his sweat-slicked hair. Like a cat, he perks up to your touch, lifting his head, angling it. He kisses you, deeply. Kisses your relief.
“Where are your manners, hm?” he whispers onto your mouth, giving you hard strokes that erase your vocabulary. You want to make him come and so you push against his thrusts, but to no avail. The intensity won’t allow you.
“Thank you, Yoongi,” you murmur, cradling his face, pecking him, giving him the softest eyes you could muster so you can show him how much it means to you.
He approves of your effort on bettering your manners and to reward you, he lifts you up and fucks you in the air. Your breasts bounce against the material of his T-shirt, stimulating you and he alters between jackhammering into you and sliding you up and down on his length. Your pussy squelches around his girth, tightening and Yoongi—
Yoongi loses his mind.
And it’s him who begins to babble when you snap your hips down on him in circles.
“Just like that, honey, oh fuck. So good, so good for me.”
He takes it until his sounds grow in volume and you focus so much on his pleasure that you forget about yours.
But you don’t let him take charge.
“Let me fuck you, please, Yoongi. I wanna make you come.”
Just like you, he’s out of it and because of that, because you asked so nicely, he lets you.
His chest heaves, staccatos of his choked out breaths sail through the room and you can see it on his face that he’s close. Brows furrowed, bottom lip bleeding due to the way he bites hard on it, the way his mouth pops open and his eyes flutter closed.
You hold onto his neck with your dear life.
“Look at me,” you demand and swirl your hips in slow circles around his tip. “I want you to look at me when you come.”
You’re so stunned that he allows you to be in charge, even more when he truly does open his eyes and pierces his gaze into yours.
“I need to pull out,” he breathes, but you shake your head, snapping your hips down on him harshly.
“No, I want your cum in me. And I want it to be inside of me when Jungkook fucks me.”
Yoongi grunts and this is it for him. His cock twitches in you, over and over again and then you feel it—the hot, thick ropes of his cum stuffing you full. You’re so mesmerized by the feeling, by the blissfulness evident on his face, by the smoothness between his brows at last that you can’t even milk him dry. You’re frozen, stupefied by his beauty, by his personal rapture and you want to feel it in unity with him. You kiss him.
It’s him who fucks him cum into you, burying it deep, moaning into your lip lock.
It’s him who lays you down to your original position and briefly, feebly licks the sheen on your spread lips before devouring your clit.
It’s him who gives you the fastest orgasm of your life.
And it’s him who tells you—in the shower—the story of how he almost beat up Jungkook black and blue once he heard him say how pretty you are.
And it’s you who checks up on him.
“You sure you’re okay with this?”
You’re stroking his hair in the bed, the duvet heavy and warm around your body and his, the night overflowing into morning—Yoongi, too.
He’s falling asleep, but still conscious, still here with you, purring.
“I wouldn’t be waking him up in the middle of the night if I wasn’t,” he whispers, opening his eyes to look at you, to see you enveloped in the extra blanket of the dawn’s rosy light—glowing, throwing the sun off of its throne. “Poor guy just got out of the military and you’ve already rocked his world.”
You smile, fondly, thumb caressing his temple. Yoongi hums in appreciation.
“I’m happy for him he’s getting pussy—one that’s mine. Before he enlisted, he spent all his time painting and getting drunk alone,” he pauses in a thought, blinking at the light. “You still want this?”
You nod, settling into his chest. Yoongi pulls you closer, tucking the duvet into the lines of your form, bringing in comfort and sleepiness.
“I’ll make sure you have the time of your life. I’ll be here the whole time, taking care of you,” he promises against your hair and you squeeze him.
“He hasn’t said yes, though. He could turn me down.”
“I’ve seen the way he looked at you. You have nothing to fear. He’ll come to you like a puppy.”
Yoongi sinks the promise onto the plane of your forehead and holds you as you drift to sleep. Happy, relieved, steamed off of all the negative things you went through. It evaporates into the dawn—far, far away from you.
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© 2024 hoseoksluna, all rights reserved.
BACK to masterlist / READ part two
#yoongi x oc#yoongi x reader#yoongi x you#yoongi smut#bts smut#bts imagine#yoongi imagine#min yoongi#bts scenarios#yoongi scenarios#yoongi fluff#btscreatorscorner#kpop smut#yoongi one shot#jungkook smut#jungkook x oc#jungkook x reader#jungkook x you#jeon jungkook#jungkook imagine
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idk if you’ve answered this before or if it’s something you may not want to answer but i was wondering how your journey from the early stages of finding out about manifesting up until knowing you’re the operant power and your full potential was like
my manifesting journey so far
Hello my love! I think I just haven't seen the question yet but I would love to answer!
As far as I'm concerned, I knew manifesting as manifesting around the time I was 18 and in my first year of university. But ofc, I was manifesting the whole time before. The university I went to had the lowest acceptance percentage ever but I still managed to get in even with my grades that didn't meet their requirements and i didn't even do the college essay that everyone else had to do. I remember just deciding over and over that I would go there no matter what anybody said. I was told it was expensive and I didn't care, I was gonna go anyways. It was $40k/yr at the time and I got $36k worth of scholarship....... I just thought that was just luck.
Before then, I was obsessed with One Direction and 5 Seconds Of Summer like y'all it was bad! I wanted to see them in concert so freakin bad, it was like my life depended on it. I literally manifested them coming to my state and to a city that people don't really tour all the time and yall!!!!! I was like right in front of them and I def passed out hearing Zayn sing live. I saw both bands live together, it was incredible. I used subliminals to clear my skin in high school as well but eventually forgot about them.
I think having my dad tell me I could do anything I wanted is what lead me to believe that if I wanted something, it was automatically mine.
In college, I would always have s*x with the guys i wanted just by visualizing or saying they wanted me sooo bad (still works now!). I would make up friend groups in my head and then find that i would be in them not even two weeks later. I watched "The Secret" in my first year and that was really transformational for me bc I always felt like I was failing God and my family bc I didn't want to go the medical route/even finish college.
The summer of 2021, I was 22 and at home with my parents and broke asf and i said no more! I started consciously manifesting again even though I didn't know that's what it was called. I decided I would get a job in marketing that would pay me over $70k/yr even though I had one month of experience and only certifications in the field. Did that matter??? Of course not!!!!! It was remote and had unlimited pto and i could go on as many vacations a year as I wanted. I found out about the law a month after I started my job but for some reason, it felt so complicated and I found myself trying so damn hard rather than just reminding myself how I got what I wanted before. literally inner conversations, visualizing and talking out loud about my desires.
What made me realize I could manifest anything was when I changed my menstrual cycle and went to Dubai for free twice. What the 3d looks like never matters especially when it came to my cycle, I deadass couldn't see how my internal organs would change according to what I wanted but ofc they changed anyways. it was shortened and I haven't had cramps in months. Going to Dubai for free by imagining Abdullah slamming the door in my face and telling me I was in Dubai. I literally made a pinterest board of where I'd go in Dubai and I went to every single place. I would tell myself over and over that I'm gonna leave my wallet at home because everyone was gonna pay for me bc we are rich asf duh!. When I tell y'all that's exactly what happened!!!!
I've manifested so other "crazy" stuff but yea these ones definitely altered my brain chemistry.
#itsrlymine#loa success#sucess story#law of assumption#pure consciousness#manifesting#dream life#manifestation#loassumption#i am awareness#lawofassumption#void state#shifting#shiftblr#shifting community#shifting blog#imagination is reality#reality shift#success story#shifters#loa blog#loa tumblr#instant manifestation#desired reality#living in the end
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so here’s why i personally didn't like *and* left shifttok. the thing is. it’s not that it’s inherently bad, it’s just… sort of missing the point. like, wasn’t the whole goal to shift? to get out, to go somewhere else, to slip through the cracks of reality like a goddamn pro? but somewhere along the way, it turned into a glorified pinterest board. edits on edits on edits. wattpad drabbles disguised as scripts. playlists that are less about actually shifting and more about curating an aesthetic, a moodboard, a vibe. and suddenly, you’re not shifting, you’re just making content about shifting.
like, i get it. romanticising your dr is half the fun. i did and still do it myself !! who doesn’t want to bask in the idea of their perfect world? but when that becomes the main event, when it overtakes the actual act of shifting, what are we even doing here? it’s like planning a trip, making all the itineraries, buying cute outfits, but then never getting on the plane. just sitting in your room, looking at your suitcase, rewatching your own tiktoks about how fun the trip is gonna be. that’s what shifttok became. this endless loop of people hyping up their drs but not actually going to them.
and maybe that’s the problem. because if you spend too much time making your dr look good instead of actually experiencing it, you start treating it like fiction. like something separate from you, instead of something you’re literally living. people started making edits of their drs like they were making fandom edits of a tv show. like, is this a real place you’re shifting to or is it just your latest hyperfixation? be honest. you spend so much time cooped up on video star or capcut and suddenly you don't remember the last time you affirmed or even thought about shifting.
and i’m not saying you can’t have fun with it. obviously, dream up the most insane, gorgeous, cinematic dr possible. but at some point, you have to ask yourself: am i actually trying to shift? or am i just roleplaying the idea of shifting? because shifttok is great at making shifting look cool. but the second you start seeing your dr as something to be consumed rather than something to be lived, you’ve already lost the plot.
so yeah. i left, and as soon as i did, i started actually shifting. because i actually wanted to do it. not just make a trailer for a movie i’m never gonna watch. does this make sense?????
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streamer!ellie hcs
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(my first time writing so...🫣)
warnings: none, fem!reader
lowercase intended, pictures are from pinterest and they're not mine
credits to @/cafekitsune on tumblr for the divider
masterlist
♡ plays roblox sometimes and BEEFS with literal seven year olds on voice chat because they called her a noob.
♡ "there is no WAY you're calling me a noob when you have an invisible face you GOOFBALL ."
♡ both of yous live in a one bedroom apartment because yous live in a big city and rent and college is expensive.
♡ so sometimes you can be seen doing homework or studying on your bed or another desk in the background.
♡ "guys y/n is doing homework right now so she might say hi later."
♡ rages in minecraft survival mode and just quits the game after she dies for the millionth time.
♡ "i fr cannot do this like i can't bro this game is stupid as hell anyway....", eventhough she almost punched a hole through her monitor.
♡ you post cute little short, (and/or) faceless vlogs to document your travels or events and sometimes ellie is shown in them!!
♡ the comments are so 😭😭
♡ she absolutely would defend you straight away if you get any sort of hate though.
♡ wears the STUPIDEST t-shirts and you think they're funny but you refuse to let her wear them out.
♡ like that one shirt that says "lesbians eat what?!!" and it's a load of shocked looking cats on it.
♡ "ellie... can you please change your shirt? we're going to dinner 😥"
♡ fans also send them to her through a PO box if she has one and she unboxes them on stream too, so she has a whole collection.
♡ sometimes you join her stream when she's taking a break to eat dinner or something so you show the chat your sims 4 save file or another game you like.
♡ her mic is so bad but she refuses to change it because she thinks it sounds funny.
♡ speaking of sound she also spams that sound board she has to no return (i remember reading this from someone elses post help).
♡ "CHAT I WON LETS GO", *cue the crowd cheering sound effect and a load of blow horns*
♡ "what did i have for dinner? i had a cheeseburger....", *american national anthem plays*
♡ did a whole stream watching edits her fans made her and she was giggling the whole time. (she has a favourites folder on tiktok)
♡ she's totally a repost warrior.
♡ eventhough she does stream kinda often, she makes sure to spend a lot of time with you, even if it's pausing the stream to help you make dinner during a suuuuper long charity stream or something.
♡ if she posts a photo dump on instagram or something you're always in it somehow, and it's always faceless if you don't want your face shown to that many people online.
♡ always sosososo supportive of everything you do and tells the chat if you're comfortable, she's just such a cutie pie.
♡ "guys my pretty girlfriend is graduating soon can you believe that she's just such a genius".
♡ doesn't mention the fact that she is also in college like 😭😭.
♡ sometimes she just doesn't know what to do so she goes on google maps.
♡ "lemme show yous the block i live on.... wait nevermind woah".
♡ you heard that from the other room and your heart DROPPED.
please don't buy tlou games as the creator is a zionist.
#ellie williams#streamer!ellie#ellie tlou#tlou#tlou2#ellie headcanons#ellie williams x reader#ellie williams x female reader#ellie williams x you#ellie williams hcs#divider by cafekitsune#ellie williams fluff#wlw#wlw post#sapphic#lesbian
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Characters of the day:
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The Jordan Family!!!!!!
Most underrated and funniest family in all of DC.
They have the most relatable and hilarious family dynamics ever.
It is honestly funny whenever people HC or imagine that Hal is a loner, only child guy who clings onto the bat family or others too seek closeness when he has a whole family with multiple nieces, nephews and a cousin that adore him.
Neeeeeeed a family sitcom about them asapppp
We will talk about a couple members of the family and give our facts and HC’s about them:
(I included Helen in a different post, so check that out if you want to see her)
Jack Jordan:
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The oldest child of Jessica and Martin Jordan, the brother of Hal Jordan (Green Lantern).
Often seen as the “golden child”, he was the most successful in terms of employment and economically.
Jack Jordan married a woman called Janice and had Two kids called Jason and Helen.
Canonically used to cheat on his wife with many people.
Took a lot of stress out on Hal when Jessica got sick.
Some HCs:
The kids all know the names of the women that he cheats on Janice with, they make a Bingo card with all their names on it, and compete with each other to see who wins.
Calls Hal, Jim and vice versa
Janice is in denial about the whole ordeal.
Jason Jordan
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Son of Jack Jordan and Janice Jordan, twin brother of Helen II Jordan and the nephew of Hal Jordan.
Protective of his sister, and loves his uncle Hal.
Some HC’s
He listens to instrumental music a lot
Pretends to like phonk since his friends do, but can’t get into it.
He makes a lot of Pinterest boards for the things he likes and uses it as a bucket list for inspiration.
Sends Hal airforce memes and any references to Green Lantern at all.
Him, as well as Jane are the ones who update him on internet trends he misses.
James Jordan (Jim Jordan)
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Youngest son of Jessica and Martin, younger brother of Hal and Jack.
Husband of Sue Jordan and father of Howie, Jane and Arthur.
His wife (who is a journalist) married him because she thought he was Green Lantern, later found out it was actually Hal and … yea….
Hal’s most supportive brother.
Some HCs:
Knowing that his wife thought he was Green lantern still keeps him up at night .
He tried to become a vegetarian once and then accidentally ate something that had meat within it the following day(he cried ).
He plays candy crush.
Howard (Howie) Jordan:
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Eldest son of Jim Jordan and Sue Jordan
Brother of Jane and Arthur
He is quite a smart kid, often pointing things out that even Hal doesn’t notice, and speaking his mind when he feels like it.
Some HC’s:
Howie pretends to be a superhero whenever he is alone in his room.
He always wears the colour green when Hal comes round.
He was the class president in his high school
He can name all the dinosaurs and spell them out correctly ( idk i just think he likes dinosaurs a lot).
Jane Jordan:
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Is the daughter of Jim and Jane
Sister of Howie and Arthur
Used to have quite long hair, but cut it quite short
Some HCs
She is definitely the rebellious type .
Asks Hal the come to all her parents evenings.
She loves the young justice group.
She once has split dye hair (Green and pink iykyk).
She probably had a Ben 10/danny phantom phase.
Arthur Jordan:
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Youngest child of Jim and Jane
Literally a baby
Soooo cute
Some HCs:
He watches coco melon.
iPad and YouTube kids enjoyer most likely says “Skibidi” .
Makes aeroplane noises when Hal comes over.
He knows everything and hears everything NO ONE IS SAFE.
Harold (Hal) Jordan Jr:
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The son of Larry and Helen I
The cousin of Jack, Hal and Jim
He is the third Airwave and has “radio powers”, his dad and mum were the first and second. He inherited these powers from his dad.
Is implied to be queer.
Some HCs:
He sucks at mortal combat .
He always tries to help out and keep everything sane.
He tried to do a back flip once for the first time it went terribly and Helen (his mum) instead of taking him to the hospital she phoned Hal.
Doug “Hip” Jordan:
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The no-good distant cousin of Hal and his family.
Runs around in a lot of gang circles, and tried selling Jim in a green lantern circle to a gang in an attempt to get into it.
Hal got him arrested.
Drugged the whole family and used the kids to help him do it.
Known as the black sheep of the family.
Some HC:
He is always spotted at the wrong times when someone is either hurt or fighting.
He sold John Constantine a vape.
He tries to use Morden day slang to fit in with the kids .
He uses the term “Where my hug at” to anyone that approaches him.
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#hal jordan#dc comics#john constantine#green lantern#helen jordan#family#characterofthedayfxk#comics#batman#flash dc#barry allen#halbarry#if you know you know#jack jordan#jim jordan#carol ferris
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─── YOU'RE ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS ୨୧
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PAIRING. fem!reader x jake sim .ᐟ FEATURING. riki (enhypen) & yoonchae (katseye) CONTENT. strangers to lovers , romance , fluff , cursing , petnames , reader calls yoonchae ' chae ' and riki ' rikster ' and has other nicknames for them too ^ ^ WORD COUNT. 4.3k NOTE. literally spent a whole day trying to figure out how to make my christmas theme cute...so i hope it doesn't disappoint (ᵕ—ᴗ—) enjoyy :D
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[ 🧸 ] ... ️ ㅤ' make my wish come true , all i want for christmas is you '
oh how you loved winter. you loved the snow, the chilly weather, the smell of freshly baked cookies and pine tree, being able to snuggle up under your comforter and three other blankets, and most of all— you absolutely loved christmas. but you felt like something had been missing for the past two christmases, you felt lonely.
and instead of something, it might've been someone you were missing.
you always felt like christmas was the best time of the year. wait, scratch that, you knew christmas was the best time of the year. there was always this joy and comfort of christmas that you couldn't really explain, it was just something so special. but of course, you're an adult now and you don't know what happened— but some of that magic had just faded. you didn't really know why or what happened, maybe it was just you becoming an adult and growing up.
but finally, you realized what the problem was after talking with your bestfriends, riki and yoonchae.
you felt lonely. you didn't feel that joy of having company. and even though you had your friends and family, it felt like you yearned for something more. or a special someone, a significant other.
for awhile, you had yourself convinced all you needed was you, your family, your friends, and some food. however, after watching a few k-dramas and seeing couples literally everywhere— social media and while you were out an about, you couldn't help but want a boyfriend, too.
you didn't know who this boyfriend would be, when you would be able to find a boyfriend, and how you'd do it, but you were getting kind of desperate. i mean, you had a whole pinterest board for things you wanted to do with your future boyfriend...yeah.
you had your doubts, maybe you wouldn't end up finding a boyfriend. but riki and yoonchae were sure, very sure, that your certain someone was out there waiting for you— and they were right!
now, enter sim jaeyun, or what everyone calls him, jake.
jake was just like you, he loved christmas and everything that had to with it, as well. and he was also going what you were going through, that lonely feeling. yeah, he really wanted a girlfriend. he wanted someone that would have genuine interest in him, someone that was funny, someone that was pretty, and of course— someone that absolutely loved the christmas season.
luckily for you, you checked all of those boxes.
today was november 30th, a few weeks 'till christmas. the joy was there, but also kind-of not. yesterday, yoonchae had asked you if you could go christmas shopping with her today, and of course you said yes. you just decided to brush off that lonely feeling, you were going to hang out with your bestie today, anyways!
and thank god you decided to go shopping with her, because if you didn't— you would've never met him.
yoonchip : hey girlie yoonchip: u still up for tday?
you: hey :) you: yeah, i'll meet u at xxx !!
yoonchip: sounds good ^ ^ see u at 5
right, you guys were meeting at 5pm and it was— oh shit.
it was already 3pm?!?
you don't know why you always lost track of time, but you did. so, you washed up, picked out a cute outfit— fit for the holiday season, and did your hair and makeup. you managed to get ready in just an hour and a half, which was quite rare for you.
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your outfit :
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you felt much better after getting ready and all dolled up. you were excited to walk around town and shop with yoonchae, you really did need an outing. and yes, it was snowing!
you wanted to bury yourself in the snow, it was just so gorgeous.
you made yourself a warm peppermint latte and sat down next to your large window, looking out at the pretty environment. the snow, the people, the way the sun was setting, it looked like a scene out of a movie.
you pick up your phone, remembering you had to go meet up with yoonchae. you quickly finish your latte, grab your scarf, and exit your apartment.
after what seemed like a long 16 minute drive to the town, you had finally made it. the pretty christmas decorations on all the buildings, the decorated christmas trees surrounding the street, and the warm yellow lights made you feel so happy.
you quickly walked to the shop where you were meeting yoonchae, and there she was— your bestfriend.
"chae!!" you exclaim while running up to yoonchae excitedly.
she's startled, but realizes it's just you and turns around to give you a warm bear hug. you really loved spending time with yoonchae, she was one of the few people you trusted most in your life. you really saw her as your younger sister.
"y/n!! i missed youuu" she says, you both still hugging one another.
"missed you more chae, now let's shop before all the stores close" you respond and she nods in agreement.
in a span of 45 minutes, you guys had went to 4 stores and already had 2 bags in hand each. let's just say both of you ended up shopping more for yourself rather than shopping for gifts.
"oh my god chae, my arms are already tired" you say, sounding exhausted.
"me too, want to just go back to your place?" she suggests, sounding just as exhausted as you are.
"no, not yet, i still have to find gifts for riki, and he's gonna have an attitude if i show up with nothing for him, ya know?" you explain, and yoonchae nods and rolls her eyes. riki was your guy's bestfriend, and he was supposed to be hanging out with you guys— but of course, he totally forgot.
you both sit down on a bench and place your bags down, giving your guy's poor arms a break. you and yoonchae decide that you just wanted to take a quick break, scrolling on social media for a little and enjoying the snow.
little did you know, a certain someone had been watching— no, admiring you from afar. that someone was none other than jake sim.
you first caught his eye when you were in the same clothing store as him, shopping around with yoonchae. you'd walked by him, and he got a whiff of your perfume— you smelt just like vanilla and freshly baked cookies. he immediately turned to look at you and holy shit, you were gorgeous, you looked like a dream. he never thought he had an ideal type, well, until he saw you.
he was in a trance, just staring at you. thank god you hadn't seen him, you probably would've thought he was a weirdo. the way you were dressed, your silky hair, your pretty big eyes, your voice, shit, he was falling in love.
and he overheard you talking to yoonchae about how much you loved the christmas decorations and snow outside, oh my god. something in him was telling him that you guys were soulmates, and he had to talk to you somehow— it was now or never.
he quickly shakes off the nerves and slowly makes his way across the street, towards you. at first, you don't notice. but yoonchae does, and she nudges your shoulder.
"y/n, girl, look up" she whispers and quickly looks back down at her phone.
you look up and holy shit, he's so pretty. his hair was so fluffy, he had such a tall nose bridge and pretty plump lips and wait, he's walking towards you? fuck, you could already feel your hands getting clammy.
and before you know it, this insanely handsome man was standing right in front of you, smiling while looking down at you. he looked kind-of nervous, but you found it quite cute.
"hey uhm, i'm jake. i just saw you from over there" he points to the store across the street, "and not to be weird, i just thought you were so gorgeous and uhm—" he cuts himself off, he's just rambling at this point. he can't bear to look you in the eyes, he's too nervous.
' goddamn jake, cmon, don't scare her away ' he thinks.
you giggle at the way he suddenly freezes, looking at the ground.
"thanks jake, that's sweet of you. i'm y/n" you say while smiling, and he almost melted. your voice sounded so sweet, so pretty.
you quickly look over at yoonchae and you spot a slight smirk on her face, as if she's holding back a little laugh.
you did sound kind-of nervous, and she was probably going to tease you about this afterwards.
"yeah of course, so like, is there any way that i could get your number? or i could give you mine, uhm yeah anything works" he says, sounding just as nervous as you were.
you can't help but smile at him, he was so cute. and of course you were going to give him your number, how could you not?
"of course, here" you tell him while handing him your phone, "you can put your number and name in"
he was smiling, really hard. he was getting your number, or wait, you were getting his number, whatever. and the cherry on top? you were the prettiest girl he'd ever seen. he definitely wasn't going to be able to sleep tonight, that's for sure.
"yeah uhm, thanks y/n, i'll text you later" jake says while giving you your phone back, finally looking you in the eyes and shit, he might've just peed himself.
your eyes were so...sparkly...?
you smile at him, your heart was basically melting at this point.
"okay, text you later jake!" you say while giggling as he walks away, you can't help it— he's so cute. you've never met a guy that had this effect on you, maybe jake was special.
as soon as he's out of sight, yoonchae wheezes.
"yoonchae i almost shat myself—"
she wheezes again and puts her hand on your shoulder.
"i know girl, i could tell but did you see him? he looked so in love, so lovey dovey, maybe he's your christmas present" she says, teasingly.
"yoonchae stop" you laugh while playfully shoving her, but maybe she was right.
maybe he was your christmas present, and perhaps you were his. you just weren't quite aware of that yet.
after another hour, you and yoonchae both parted ways. and as soon as you got to your apartment, you absolutely freaked the fuck out. all of the excitement just came rushing out of you, and frankly— you didn't even know that you were that happy, after just meeting a guy.
well, a really cute guy.
once you calmed down a bit, you decided to change into your comfortable gingerbread pajamas and go onto instagram. what you expected was to just see your normal feed, your friend's posts and whatnot. what you didn't expect to see, at all, was jake's post right there— all up in your face. you guessed it was because he was in your contacts now but shit, he looked so good in person and online.
you were contemplating if you should like the post and follow him, until you realized he had already followed you and actually left you a text message.
jake: hey y/n :))
you pause for a second and text him back.
you: hii jake
while waiting for a response, you hop back onto instagram and follow him. i mean, it's fine, he was already following you.
your eyes were blessed with his face when you clicked onto his profile. you were also looking at his other posts, and you found out he had a dog named layla, cute.
jake: i see you liking my posts jake: hehe
you giggle.
you: okay annddd? you: you literally followed me first and liked 90% of my posts
jake: damn, you got me there jake: jake 0 , y/n 1 jake: lol, anyways i was wondering what ur interests are?
you sit and think for a good minute, your interests only really had to do with winter and christmas, and maybe watching movies?
you: i'm kinda boring :p you: i really like christmas, and snow, and i guess watching movies
you see that he reads the text, but after one minute— he still hasn't responded. god, was he laughing at how boring you were?
unbeknownst to you, he was actually kicking his feet and giggling. so you did really like christmas. and you liked the snow and watching movies, too? fuck, you were his perfect match.
jake: sorry had to go get smth jake: but that's cool, and ur not boring :) i rlly like christmas too
you let out a sigh of relief after reading his texts.
your guy's conversation goes on for another one and a half hours, talking about your interests and stuff related to christmas. he was so interested in christmas, just like you. your heart was beating out of your chest, in a good way of course.
after you both said your "goodnights" to each other, you had tried to fall asleep. but you couldn't. you were daydreaming, about him, jake, his pretty face and cute personality. how he loved christmas and movies just like you did. how he didn't find you boring.
you wondered if he was already fast asleep, or daydreaming just like you.
and yes, he was indeed daydreaming— just like you were.
he'd never felt so comfortable around someone, let alone a female. he'd never really been good at even talking to females since, well, ever. he loved how you had the same humor and interests as him, he loved how naturally cute you were, and of course— he loved how you rambled about how much you loved the christmas season.
fast forward a little more than a week later, you and jake had been "talking" and god, he was your dream guy. you were sure of it now.
he was respectful, always holding doors open for you and walking you to your apartment when it was dark. he always complimented you and told you how gorgeous you were, even if you hadn't brushed your hair or gotten all dolled up. and best of all, he was always listening when you talked, even about the stupidest things. even when you were rambling about how gingerbread pajamas are cuter than snowman pajamas, he was genuinely listening.
oh, and you absolutely adored his smile and the way he laughed. honestly, he was like a human golden retriever.
you were falling for him, but...did he feel the same for you?
the quick answer, is yes, definitely yes.
he was sure that he was already in love with you when he laid eyes on you that first day. you looked so unreal and beautiful, and your personality was just as beautiful, too. that's what really locked him in. you were sweet, caring, funny, loved animals, loved christmas, and enjoyed making legos with him.
yeah, you were the one.
he just hadn't found the balls to ask you out properly, yet. but he knew he had to, at least before christmas.
today was the 14th of december and for some reason, jake decided that he actually had the balls today. you'd invited him over to make some cute christmas legos and watch home alone together, and of course he couldn't say no.
once he arrived to your place, he was in awe of how pretty you had decorated it. your tree was beautiful, ornaments and all. and your house smelt like a warm hug, like vanilla and christmas tree. but what he was even more in awe of was how beautiful you were, i mean, every time he saw you he was in awe.
but wow, you looked so gorgeous with your bare face. the way your hair was in a messy bun and you were in your cute little gingerbread pajamas, he just wanted to squish you. in a loving way, of course.
"hey jae, come in!" you say as you open the door. you'd started calling him jae, and he didn't mind it. in fact, he thought it was quite cute.
he ruffles your hair as he walks by you.
"wow y/n, your place is so pretty" he says, and you thank him.
"okay so, the lego set is already ready to be made over there" you point to your living room, "but i was actually thinking of doing face masks before..." you grin at him, "wanna do a face mask with me?" you ask while giving him puppy eyes, of course he couldn't say no.
the thing is, he never really knew what a face mask did, or how to do it, but he just wanted to make you happy, and it really did.
you had bought special christmas face masks for this special occasion, and jake— of course, found you adorable. you gave him a santa one and you gave yourself a snowman. and after finally putting the face masks on, you decided to take some cute selfies with him.
' we look like a couple ' you think, and you feel your ears start to get all red and hot.
"y/n? why are your ears so...red?" he asks, slightly giggling while brushing his hair back with his pretty fingers.
god, this was embarrassing, really embarrassing. he looked so beautiful and naturally just perfect, and you here you were, looking like a blushing mess.
and yeah, you might've thought of it as embarrassing, but jake was even more embarrassed because of how cute he found your red ears. he was already so in love with you, and at this point— he was really holding back the urge to just kiss your pretty face.
"uh i'm just cold, here wait, i'll go turn on the heater" you say, quickly getting up to go turn on the heater, even though that wasn't really the cause of your red ears.
he just nods and stares, he can't help it— you're literally the cutest in every way possible.
30 minutes later, you find yourselves building the lego set together. it's so much fun, you never had an interest in legos before this, but now you definitely did.
"jae—"
he quickly looks up from whatever he's doing, did you just call him jae? he felt his heart beat a little quicker at the cute nickname, he wishes you would accidentally call him that more often.
"sorry jake, uhm" you clear your throat, "i'm kind-of hungry" you mumble, focused on trying to piece together a lego.
"not going to lie, me too. oh my god, y/n, let's make ramen and hot chocolate" he suggests eagerly, but you turn your head in confusion. you've never heard of that combo before, but you were willing to try it since he was so excited about it.
"okay, i need a break from this anyways" you laugh, "i have all my ramens and instant noodles in the cabinet next to the stove" you tell him, as you go to get your phone from the couch, first.
he immediately gets up and happily runs to the cabinet, cute. he got so excited about little things, and it made your heart melt. he was so...genuine.
"i'll make chapagetti!" he says, grabbing a pot and filling it with water.
"okay, i'll make the hot chocolate" you respond, walking over to the kitchen and grabbing your needed ingredients.
you're both focused, he's making his favorite chapagetti, and you're making your y/n signature hot chocolate. there was silence, but a comfortable one. you liked it, and so did he.
however, you're interrupted by a knock on the door. you hadn't invited anyone except for jake. you curiously walk over to the front door and open it.
"hey miss y/n" riki says as you open the door.
"hey rikster" you respond, "i didn't invite you but come in, i guess..." you tell him, rolling your eyes playfully.
you notice the present in his hands.
"is that for me?" you ask curiously, but also matching his playful tone.
"might be..." he responds while putting the gift on a small table near the entrance.
"oh and i have a guest over—" you try to tell him while walking over to the kitchen, but you're cut off by riki's excitement.
"jake hyung?!" he exclaims while running up to jake, who is caught off guard.
"oh my god, riki" jake laughs, "wait— how do you know y/n?"
"bro, i've literally told you about her" riki says while plopping onto your couch, his favorite part about your place.
"wait" riki says, smirking at you and then at jake.
"are you two dating or something? why are you here jake?" he asks teasingly while raising one of his eyebrows.
you both freeze. you wished riki would just shut the fuck up sometimes, honestly.
you quickly glance at jake, and his cheeks are slightly pink. he was just as flustered as you, and that somehow made you feel little butterflies in your stomach.
"riki shut the fuck up for once, please— we aren't dating" you say sternly while scratching your nape.
you and jake weren't dating, but fuck, you really wished you were.
you catch how jake's expression slightly changed when you told riki that you two weren't dating, did he feel the same way you did?
jake thought he made it obvious, but i guess not.
"anyways" he clears his throat, "i finished making the chapagetti" jake says, placing his finished ramen on the counter.
wow, it looked good.
"nice! the hot chocolate is done, too" you respond.
you were about to pull out a chair for you to sit on but jake beats you at it, and pulls out the chair for you.
you just stare at him, you're taken aback. how could one be so respectful and funny, yet so beautiful? is he even real? you were actually wondering if you were hallucinating him.
"y/n this isn't a k-drama" riki reminds you while laughing, and you're embarassed.
"shut the fuck up" you tell him, annoyed and embarassed because he literally just did what does best— calling you out.
jake just lets out a little laugh, still waiting for you to sit.
"ah sorry, thanks jae" you thank him and of course, you accidentally blurt out that cute nickname. you feel your heart drop to your ass, silently praying that riki wouldn't tease you.
he just nods and smiles at you, seemingly nonchalant. however, he was jumping and giggling and screaming on the inside.
you brush it off and you both start enjoying the food, and damn is it good.
"wow y/n" his eyes widening as he takes a sip of the hot chocolate, "your hot chocolate might be better than mine"
you playfully smack his arm, but end up accidentally feeling the muscle. the world was against you right now, you were convinced.
"thanks mister sim" you tell him, trying to play off whatever the fuck just happened to you.
after eating, you both continued building the cute lego set together with riki bothering you guys the whole time.
"awh you two look like a couple"
"are you sure you guys aren't dating?"
"couple goals"
"you guys win couple of the year"
"oh my god riki can you shut the fuck up" jake finally snaps. he might sound disapproving, but he wishes that riki's words were true.
"damn, my bad bro" riki says while playfully putting his arms up, and you giggle. you had no clue they knew each other, but you don't mind it.
once you guys finished the lego, you took a picture of it and placed it on your coffee table. the lego set was two reindeers in a winter wonderland, and for some reason— it reminded you of you and jake.
now, you're both sat on the couch with a blanket over both of you. yeah you were sharing a blanket, but it wasn't weird for friends...right?
"cute" jake accidentally blurts out.
you assume that he's talking about the lego and you nod your head in agreement. however, you don't notice that he's literally staring at you.
"i'm gonna go now" riki says, getting up from the couch. finally, you were waiting for him to get his ass out of here.
"bye" you and jake say in unison.
"bye lovebirds" riki says playfully as he exits, and now there's silence. not as comfortable as earlier, either.
you're fidgeting with your nails, why was the silence so loud. you glance over at jake, and you're taken aback at how he's already looking at you.
this was his chance. he had to do it now.
"y/n" he says gently.
"mhm?" you hum, staring down at your hands.
"i like you" he tells you.
your brain shuts off, oh my fucking god. jake did feel the same way.
you slowly look up and you're met with jake's pretty brown eyes staring right into yours. he has the sweetest smile on his face, you almost started tearing up.
"jae"
his heart melts at the nickname.
"i like you, too."
oh my god, he could scream.
"really?" he asks softly while brushing your hair behind your ear.
"yeah" you respond in almost a mumble, you know your cheeks are red as fuck right now. your ears, too.
instantly, jake gently pulls you closer and wraps his arms around you. you smell so good, just like vanilla. he slowly brushes your hair with his fingers, head resting on your shoulder.
"this okay, pretty girl?"
you smile at the petname and how adorably soft his voice sounds.
"more than okay, jae"
you were both unexplainably happy right now, and stuck in unbelief. you had found your perfect match, your person.
you finally found the person that you'd be able to spend your christmases with. he was all you wanted and needed for christmas.
jake sim was the best present you could've ever wished for.
please like, reblog, and comment if u enjoyed :3 u can find my other works here !
© mochiwonz ― all rights reserved. do not copy, steal, or translate my work.
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#── mochiwonz ୨୧#jake sim#jake enhypen#sim jaeyun#by ioveartfilm#enhypen#enha#enha x reader#enha fluff#enhypen jake#jake x reader#enha imagines#enhypen jaeyun#jaeyun fluff#jaeyun x reader#romance#jake fluff#fluff#christmas fic#enhypen scenarios#ni ki#enhypen riki#yoonchae#enhypen au#jake imagines#jake enha#jake fic#sim jaeyun x reader#sim jaeyun fluff#sim jaeyun x you
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can you share some of your Luke recs?
Of course! I may have gone a bit overboard but I just love love love all these fics and their authors so so much. I highly recommend all these writers and their blogs, from the nsfw to the sfw, I couldn't stress how highly I respect and recommend them enough:
≡ᴍᴇɢ's ʟᴜᴋᴇ ʜᴜɢʜᴇs ғɪᴄ ʀᴇᴄs
—SMUT
♥ again by @hhughes (you can find her on @bedsyandco now I think) ➥ I frequently find myself going back to this one, the way Cami has written it is just so addicting and it's so hot.
♥ the mortifying ordeal of being a 20 year old virgin by @theemporium ➥ This series is hard as hell, literally love it. Each chapter is just divine and I love Luke and reader's dynamic, it's so juicy and with every new chapter, I think I literally heel click and do a jig.
♥ escape from la by @eyesthatroll ➥ Another one I go back to often, still think about it to this day actually, I just picture it vividly and it gives me butterflies every time.
♥ locker room by @lucijawriteswords ➥ Words cannot describe how much of a chokehold this one has on me. Angry Luke is so hot and I can't stop thinking about the imagery and I want this so bad.
♥ those sleepless nights - @wineauntie ➥ I present to you; my bedtime story. Sleepy smut is just so yummy, you know? And I just wanted Luke wrapped around me after I read this, I now go back to it when it's some silly hour of the morning.
♥ stress reduction by @goldfades ➥ Bro I cannot begin to explain how many times I've read this one. Short and sweet and so sensual, I want it. You'll literally read it and feel something.
♥ risqué reflections by @sweetestdesire ➥ This is the place for filth and I'm a loyal customer. This fic had me doing deep breaths and GOD it's so yummy. Read it once and then went back because the buzz it gave me.
♥ the green eyed monster by @puck-luck ➥ Jealousy has never looked hotter on a man. I remember reading this one morning before uni and yeah let's say I wasn't thinking about my class that day. Andy went all in with this and Jesus it was hot as fuck.
—FLUFF
♥ he's been a bit of a jerk by @rowdyluv ➥ I've never liked the winter more, I need Luke to come find my lonely ass and kiss me too. This was too cute honestly and the second part is just as good. Recommend reading them back-to-back.
♥ too tall by @toasttt11 ➥ Anything to do with height differences has me in shambles and this was so cute. I just love the image of Luke standing in the kitchen at 12am like a deer in headlights.
♥ uh oh by @be4chywritez ➥ The Curtis-Luke rivalry will always make me giggle and even funnier with the sneaking around trope, I adored this and the locker room scene. The whole thing is so cute and lighthearted.
♥ jelly on a plate by @wineauntie ➥ I dislike the process of flying so this was a really comforting read and I love it so much. It's adorable and reassuring at the same time and if you're not a fan of flying, I really recommend having Luke with you in spirit.
♥ my princess by @lvrhughes ➥ No because this one's fun and fresh and adorable. Something about drunken nights will always get me, especially when it's one looking after the other. Filled my heart with warmth.
♥ caught by @ifimdreaming ➥ Love this one a lot, it's funny and cute. It perfectly portrays siblings having an argument and Trevor making an appearance will always be funny. Luke is just too cute and love me protective Luke.
♥ kiss her you fool by @withwritersblock ➥ Tooth rotting fluff, friends to lovers and just pining and that's my cup of tea. Loverboy Luke has you aching for him to be honest and you'll wish you were y/n and so much touching that has you tingling.
♥ "are you awake yet?" blurb by @bedsyandco @hhughes ➥ I wish I had this in my life, honestly. Read this and you wish you did too. It's so sweet it makes me kick my feet and twirl my hair, run laps around my room, go through my Luke Pinterest board. I love the way Cami writes Luke.
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cold nights // epilogue
summary: a few years later...
pairing: coriolanus snow x fem!reader
wc: 3.7k
masterlists / nav / requests
tags/warnings: tribute!reader and mentor!coriolanus, r is very sweet (too kind for this world. literally.), sunshine x grumpy trope kinda, he falls first, violence typical for the source material, depictions of mental illness, also she's is very smart (as she should), district twelve!reader.
a/n:
here it is :) the epilogue :)
(i'm crying, could you tell??) i figured it was time to post this now that we've officially entered the overlapping requiem/michigan cherry era. tbh i was just afraid to let these two go bc i love them so much.
thank you all again SO so much for all the love on this fic. it has truly meant everything to me that so many people came on this actual JOURNEY with me, i never intended this to be so long but here we are.
anyway, stick around for requiem!! and i hope you loved this if you made it this far!!
my asks are also open to talk about this series! (i do have emoji anons open now too!)
send me any and all of your thoughts! here!
series masterlist // playlist // pinterest board
You were all dressed up in one of your finest gowns, attending the gala that preceded the presidential election.
Coriolanus was running, of course, and you were so incredibly proud. He's worked toward this for years, and you had been there every step of the way since the tenth annual Hunger Games, all those years ago. It felt like a distant memory- albeit one that still haunted you regularly.
You were a whole new person. A Capitol citizen most of the year, and you were happy most of the time. You and Coryo had always gone home in the summers, though, to spend your days surrounded by friends and family under the District Twelve sun. You always looked forward to it, but three months never felt like quite enough time. You missed your old life, but that's all it could be now.
While some Capitol elite was talking your ear off about the upcoming games, that's all you can think about. Well, how after the election that your boyfriend would most certainly win, those summers of peace would be a thing of the past. It was hard to think about, which is why you focussed on how you could work around it. Perhaps you would make smaller visits throughout the year- although Coryo was prepping you for the endless tasks that would even be put onto you as the First Lady of Panem. Once he wins the election, he would propose- and it would be followed by the wedding of the century. You didn't know if you dreaded it or if the pressure of it all just scared you beyond what excitement could repair.
"Miss Y/L/N?" Your train of thought is abruptly interrupted and you hum in response, bringing the champagne glass to your lips, acting like you were paying attention the whole time.
"Yes?" You respond as you lower your glass. "My apologies, I just spaced out for a moment there. It's a big day, after all..." You chuckle to recover, tilting your head slightly at them.
"I was just asking if you had any input in the arena for the next Games, if you could give us any hints." The man asks, seemingly impatient with you getting distracted.
"Oh," You reply, smile fading softly. "No, I- I really try to stay out of all of that." You laugh nervously, gripping tighter onto the glass as you take another sip, relieved when you feel someone's hand on your arm.
"Y/N, come sit. Coriolanus's speech is about to start, he got me to save you a seat at my table." Sejanus says, linking his arm with yours.
You politely excuse yourself from the conversation and allow him to pull you away. "Many thanks." You whisper to him, chuckling slightly as you glance back over your shoulder at the older man you were speaking to. "Some people are so tone-deaf, aren't they?"
"Most definitely." He sighs, shaking his head as he guides you toward his table at the front of the banquet hall, close to the stage. "Apparently that will never change."
Sejanus Plinth was your saving grace all these years, that, however, had never changed. You didn't see him as much anymore, with you being locked up in your office in the Snow penthouse focused on writing book after book until you were burnt out. His role as a doctor in and out of the Districts certainly didn't help either, but you knew he was partial to working back home in Twelve so he could spend more time with Lucy Gray. You were glad he was much more fulfilled in his adult life than you were; you always knew he would do well and you were proud. You had to take moments every so often to remind yourself that when you first met him and Coryo, you had been sad that you wouldn't get to see the men they would become but you had wondered. Now, you had your answers.
"Is that not the truth." You scoff under your breath, smiling and giving a quick wave to a few familiar faces as you pass. You had become somewhat of a people-pleasing expert, the same way Coriolanus had.
You sit down at the table at the front of the room just as the lights slightly dim, and the spotlight hits the stage. You gently cross one leg over the other, careful not to wrinkle your dress and clap in just the perfect polite way you had learned how to over the years, smiling as you see Coryo walk up onto the stage.
He waves, and people whistle and clap, and the smile on his face seems a little more genuine than it normally is during these speeches. Of course, though, this is his final address before he no doubt gets voted in as president, and you know that he is excited.
"Hello, everyone. Thank you so much for coming out tonight..." He says, in a subtle cue to get people to quiet down so he could speak, a drink still in his hand that he delicately hovers above the podium next to him. "This has been such an incredible opportunity for both of us running, and I must say, it's been fun." He tips the glass toward the other table at the front, and your eyes follow the movement to the other candidate, your friend and former classmate, Hilarius Heavensbee. They've never gotten along, and you know Hilarius wants nothing to do with this job. Not really. It makes you sad, a little bit, that his family would push him this far when he had confided in you in his freshman year that it wasn't what he wanted.
The man just gives Coryo a polite but nervous smile, taking another sip out of his own champagne glass. From where you were, you could see his hand trembling. You knew he would have to go next, and Coriolanus Snow was always a tough act to follow.
"Now, I am very happy about this turnout, because I have two important announcements to make." He continues, and whispers fill the room. You look over at Sejanus, a slight look of shock on your face. You didn't know he had anything special to announce, and he always kept you in the loop on everything. Sejanus just shrugs, looking back up at Coryo again. It must not actually be a big deal- it was probably just thanking some more people who have donated to his campaign.
"Firstly," He clears his throat, taking a step to the side as the screen behind him lights up. "For just a moment, see me as your head game maker and forget all about me running for president. Or don't, actually, maybe keep that in mind, but at the back of your mind." He chuckles, the little joke making the audience laugh. He was much more personable now than he once was, you smile a little as you remember helping him write his earlier speeches in a way that would make him more likable. "With the help of my fellow candidate and personal good friend, we are trying something new when it comes to The Hunger Games."
When he speaks, your heart drops and you sit up a little straighter- feeling all eyes on you as you just focus on him. For the first time, he looks down at you and gives you a small smile, the slightest nod in an effort to reassure you that it wasn't as scary as it sounded. You swallow and just keep your smile on as best as you can, ignoring all the stares.
"So, we all love The Games. They're exciting, the stakes are high, and I know every year we all pick our favourite tributes to root for and it's hard to watch them fall but, god, do I know better than anyone how good it feels when they win." Your cheeks burn intensely as Coryo sends a smile and a wink your way, and the screen behind him flashes to a picture of the two of you, taken after your shared university graduation just a couple of years ago. You were both smiling, but he was looking at you as he held you tight around your waist, and you looked into the camera and held up a three-finger salute. People are laughing and awe-ing at the photo of the two of you, and you laugh nervously, looking over at Sejanus with slightly panicked eyes.
You would be absolutely fine with this if he had just run it by you before, and you knew that whether you liked it or not, the Games were an integral part of who you were now, and always would be- but you certainly didn't want your name on anything to do with these new changes they're making. But, he wouldn't be talking about you at all if he knew you would hate it. You had to remind yourself of that.
"So, you all know my beautiful Y/N, of course, we're all big fans of hers here," Coryo says, gesturing to where you were sitting and you let out a nervous laugh, shaking your head at him in a way that would appear teasing to everyone else while he waits for everyone to finish clapping for you. "Don't get embarrassed already, darling, I've got a bit more to say about you so just sit tight, okay? Nothing bad, I promise." He says to you, looking into your eyes even as he stands up on the stage, everyone's laughter echoing in the background.
"So, I have known Y/N and her outstanding mind for years now. The Games are what brought us together when we were both just kids, but you all already know that story so I'll spare you the details. The bottom line is, I am so proud of the woman she has become. She's written two books that will soon become three, she graduated in the top three percent of our class with only a District education to build on, and she is the single most well-spoken, well-mannered, beautiful, and caring woman I have ever met. Truly, she has changed my entire outlook on life." He says, talking more so to the audience than to you, knowing that you're so embarrassed by this. And he would be correct. "It has truly been a privilege to know her, and to love her."
"But that was a long journey for us both, and a seemingly endless uphill battle for her recovery, despite her strength. The Games can be scary, let's be totally honest. It's life or death, and winning will change you, but Y/N came out the other side and wanted to make a difference for her family and that inspired me. And she continues to inspire me every day." Coryo says, pausing to take a sip of his champagne again. "So, all of this is to say, I'd like to thank her for all her support through my education, this campaign, and through the life we're building together. She inspired this idea in me and with the help of my fellow game makers as well as the Plinth family..." You look over at Sejanus as he continues, suddenly realizing he must have known about what was happening. He keeps a small smile on his lips as he watches, refusing to make eye contact with you.
"This," Coryo says, turning to look up at the screen while a picture comes up of a small cul-de-sac of beautiful homes. "Is just the beginning of the Victor's Rehabilitation Initiative."
You tilt your head, a shocked and confused smile on your face as you take in the photo and try to decipher what he's talking about.
"So, recently, Y/N has been more open with everyone about the struggles that came with being crowned a victor in our Games. Yes, they get to walk away with their lives, but what if winning meant something more? What if it meant security for them and their families, so they're not returning to their Districts with no sense of what to do next? That, everyone, is what this program is for. To help the strongest of them find a purpose again, and to encourage the bravest of Panem's children to get back on their feet after such an impressive feat as winning the Games."
You have to very consciously force your jaw to stay shut when you realize what he is saying, clapping along with everyone else while your smile relaxes into something more genuine. You knew that he wanted to abolish the Games altogether, and you knew that no matter who won the election, they wouldn't proceed for much longer. This was the first step in that direction, and you were flooded with emotions. Pride, excitement, relief.
"For ten years, until the beginning of the mentorship program, our victors were cast aside. Never to be heard from again after their win, I, for one, became curious as to what happened to them after the Games as soon as I met Y/N, and I have heard that question from many of you as well since we were all given the pleasure of getting to know her." Coryo's smile is one of pride and excitement, sparing a glance at you as he allows the audience to have their responses. So far, all seemingly positive despite the present undertones of him caring about the people in the Districts. He was a smooth talker, he knew exactly how to command a space and get people to believe what he wanted. And he was using it for good. "I mean, how many other victors have something extraordinary, just like her, that won't be utilized or nurtured? We never knew."
"From now on," He continues, the crowd quieting down. "Our victors will be given homes in what we've decided to call Victor's Villages in each of the Twelve Districts. They'll have ensured security for themselves and their families, and a generous sum of prize money to help them with whatever they need. Whether that's medical attention, both physical and emotional, or, if they so choose, when they reach the appropriate age, they could apply at our university to further their education. Though, between you and I, admittance is not guaranteed." He winks at the end and it's accompanied by laughter, which you try and go along with, but you're too close to tears to even process fully what was going on. This was a huge step in the right direction, even if like he said, acceptance was not guaranteed. "What I mean, is that it will be up to them. They can live their lives to the fullest, just like our gem, Y/N."
He looks at you again, and you can really only see his blurry form through your tears until someone is handing you a handkerchief to dry your eyes while people clap and cheer over the idea.
This was something you couldn't have imagined years ago. This was everything you've wanted since the Games- to make a difference, for people to care. And it was happening right before your eyes. Thanks to him. Thanks to you.
"And with that," Coryo says after a few moments, waiting for the crowd to quiet down after taking in your reaction. "We can move on to my second announcement, which is my formal withdrawal from the presidential campaign."
Gasps fill the room and your smile disappears, a hand coming up to your mouth as you look up at him, shocked and confused with the announcement that blindsided even you.
"Are you happy here?" You ask quietly, not wanting to disturb the peace of the evening as you walk from your parent's house back to your own in the Victor's Village.
"I couldn't be happier." Coryo replies through a soft sigh, swinging your hand gently as it's clasped between you.
"Are you sure?" You say again, feeling a little uncertain despite weeks of his endless reassurance that this was, in fact, what he wanted.
To him, this scenario was perfect. He could keep his job as head gamemaker, planning to only return to the Capitol for a few months or so every year for the Games. He knew that wouldn't last much longer, though, not with Hilarius Heavensbee in office. Coryo gives it a few years and a few major "accidental" mistakes on his part for the viewership of the annual event to die out and open the door for the president to call them off, just like he had always wanted to.
And every day Coryo would wake up to see you in your happy place, the only place you'd ever felt truly at home. He was more than happy to give it all up for the greatest sake of seeing you smile.
"Of course." He smiles, never growing tired of telling you the same thing over and over again if it meant he could ease your mind.
The moonlight bounces off his in a way that makes you think it could be glowing if you didn't know any better.
"I told you that I would be. Years ago. You remember?"
"Of course I remember."
He lets out a breathy laugh at your reply, shaking his head. "That was a foolish question. I don't think you've ever forgotten a single word anyone has ever spoken to you."
"Sure I have." You say, tilting your head as you look up at him, trying to catch the same moonlight reflect in the blue of his eyes as you walk down the path. "I just don't forget... the important bits."
"I will try my best to take care of you while you're here."
"My honest, best advice? Figure out a way to escape."
"I can't have killed them all for nothing."
"You are not a beast."
"Please, don't walk away again."
"I survived because I had to learn to love you."
"Like in your books?" His voice interrupts the swirling of speech from years past, and you shrug.
"Not exactly... it feels different. Because I can hear it, still." You explain, voice dropping into something more quiet as the remnants of your fear eats away at the back of your mind, the cold night breeze imprinting your skin.
"God, the way your mind works, love." He says, and as you look up at him to be met with an expression of pride that always changes everything. "You amaze me every day."
You stay quiet, cheeks getting hot as you look back down at the path.
"Are you happy?" Coryo asks after a moment, eyes never daring to leave your profile as you walk next to him, hardly more than a silhouette in the dark. But certainly more than a ghost, now.
"I am." You reply, the smile creeping back onto your lips. "Such hours are beautiful to live, but hard to describe..."
He hums softly in response. That was a yes, but also a no in the most you fashion possible. His heart remains heavy in his chest knowing that there is nothing more he can do for you to help you heal besides be present. "Is there anything more I can do?" He asks anyway, hoping that maybe you would come up with something.
You shake your head, giving him a tight-lipped smile laced with reassurance.
"Well, then..." He sighs, rather dramatically. "I did have an idea, you know, something that might make you happy. Even just for this one beautiful hour."
You let out a laugh, squeezing his hand a bit. "If that was you asking me if we could-"
"I would like to marry you." He says, for the first time ever, not feeling guilty about interrupting you.
You stop in your tracks, and he stops with you instantly as if he were waiting for it, his hold on your hand not faltering for a second.
"I... you-"
"Darling," He starts, stepping in front of you now, blocking out the moon but hardly putting a dent in the presence of the stars over his shoulders, their soft light reflecting off his blonde curls. "I do love nothing in the world so well as you."
Your shock and confusion begins to wear off as he speaks the familiar words, and you laugh softly. "In your own words, Coryo."
He tilts his head at you, clearly not having expected that kind of response. He expected a lot of things. He planned for everything that could go wrong, he prepared for rejection, for tears, panic, even, but he did not expect that. "I, uh..." He chuckles nervously, giving his head a quick shake to get himself back on track.
He had read that play just for you. Just for this- because he knew how much you loved it, and he remembered the joy it brought you. The smile on your face when you told him about it that day at the lake had never left his mind.
"If you ask me in your own words, I shall say yes." You assure him, hands gripping tighter onto his despite your surprisingly calm demeanor.
"I thought you would like that... You know, knowing you..."
He's quick to defend himself, and your eyes almost sparkle as you look up into his own. "We should have learned by now that our story is our own, yes?" You ask. "We are not Beatrice and Benedick, or Laurie and Amy, or even Romeo and Juliet, just like I used to think we were supposed to be when my days were numbered. I thought I wanted one of those stories to be mine at least once before I died, but I was wrong." You say, taking in the embarrassed flush of his cheeks even in the dim lighting. "You are you, and I am me. No matter what you say I will be happy to marry you, so long as you ask me yourself, and not as someone else."
"Alright then." He gives you a curt nod, a smile on his face as he lowers himself in front of you, careless of the dirt that would no doubt cake into the knee of his pants. "You're everything to me, Y/N/N. My world... my heart, my soul. I didn't know what love was until I met you. I've spent the entirety of my adult life learning to love you, and I never intend to stop. Not even for a moment, so please, let me marry you, love."
"A Coryo indeed." You say softly, recalling the first day you had met him- when you only knew him as Coriolanus, and how far you both had come since then. The growing smile on your lips twitches and you nod, holding his hand a little tighter and attempting to pull Coryo back to his feet. "Of course I will. Nothing would make me happier."
He stands again and very quickly his arms are around you, holding you just as tight as they always had.
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if you want to join the taglist for future fics (requiem, michigan cherry, etc.) as well as the bonus content for this fic, follow me over on @runningfrom2am-library and turn on post notifs! all i do over there is reblog my own writing, so it's effectively a taglist :)
thanks again for being here.
xx, raye
#coriolanus fanfiction#coriolanus snow#coriolanus snow fanfiction#coriolanus snow x reader#coriolanus x reader#coriolanus x you#coryo snow#coryo x reader#tbosas fanfiction#thg tbosas#tbosas fic#tbosas x reader#tbosas#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#thg#thg fanfic#thg series#thg fanfiction#the hunger games#coryo x you#coryo#coryo fluff
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what do you think of all of the people being scared of appalachia? i don't know if this is recent or not, but currently i've been seeing a ton of shit online like "never go to the appalachian mountains, it's so dangerous", and i just don't understand it. my family's lived in appalachia for forever, and none of us have experienced anything paranormal or endangering to us. you're one of my favorite blogs on here and i'd just like to hear your thoughts on it
first off, it means a lot that i'm one of your favorite blogs and im really happy i can contribute something to your experience here :') thanks so much for being here <333
but ok so.
my thoughts on it are many. it's been bothering me a long time and i've been meaning to get it off my chest. this will be long and probably ranty, so it won't hurt my feelings if anyone skims lol
lemme preface this little diatribe by saying the obvious: folklore is an integral part of any culture. the mythos of a place/people is tied directly to their histories and unique experiences and struggles and they are enriching. this is true of appalachia too.
oral folk traditions especially are incredibly historically appalachian.
i mentioned in a post i made yesterday about murder ballads, how the purpose of these was to warn kids away from doing dumb shit and getting lost in the hollers--falling down cliffs n mineshafts and shit at night. gettin got by wildlife.
it spooked us safe. they served a purpose, and once you got old enough to realize they're as real as the tooth fairy, they just become enjoyable and nostalgic. because they're you're culture.
probably every mountain kid has stories about haints n boogers that were told to them by their grandparents, and they grow up to tell them to their own kids, and so on. some of it stuck with me because i grew up with the folklore.
by that i mean, i'm a whole 31 year old woman and i still avoid looking out a dark window at night cause it gives me the shivers. i still get spooked when i hear a big cat yowling in the woods. but the difference is i know there's not really haints out there crying--it's just a product of my childhood. ghost stories are fun.
the problem comes in when someone outside the culture gets their hands on appalachian oral folk traditions. then, it becomes a familiar problem: outsiders cherry picking appalachia and harming us with the mess they make rifling through it all.
it's all about the surface level and the visuals. they all love a good aesthetic blog, run by some local from out west or some shit who's never stepped foot here.
but as soon as the spooky photo filters come off and the real life marginalized person is left standing there just out of frame, we go back to being disgusting examples of what not to be. decrepit churches n buildings are aesthetic and quirky until they stop being on a pinterest board, and then they just become damning images of an impoverished region who deserves to be laughed at.
now, not to holler 'splain you--this is more for anyone not from here who might read this: it's been a systemic issue for decades; there were literal government campaigns to demonize us to the rest of the nation so they could garner support to cut into our mountains and exploit our labor and resources.
well, they were fuckin successful, and we have been falsely made out to be this homogenous nightmare of a place--"welfare exploiting" maga country who deserves everything we get, and nothing we don't.
by going so far as to take appalachian folklore that we tell each other and picking out the "aesthetic" stuff--the haints and general paranormal--they are pruning what they like from our culture--the safe things, like ghost stories--for their own aesthetic use.
but not only that, they are using it to demonize us… yet again.
'appalachia is scary. it's full of things that will kill you. don't look out the window at night cause a booger will get you.' only they don't call them boogers cause they ain't even from here. ask them what a haint is and they'll ask if u mispelled 'haunt.'
it gets even worse when you consider that so much of it has roots in native american culture, and how that continues to be exploited and misrepresented.
i'm not even innocent of that. a while back i had to check myself because i made a comment on here about ~spooky appalachia~ ignorant to the fact that what i was commenting on was actually a deeply important cultural and spiritual element to local indigenous tribes. my comments were harmful by my failure to educate myself and know better, thereby saying things carelessly.
my point being--i'm from the area. i should have known better.
when outsiders start saying the kind of shit they say about what they think they hear in the woods without even knowing where such an idea comes from, they're disrespecting a displaced, abused and exploited people, harming real cultures just for clicks without even knowing. that's on top of the damage they're doing to greater appalachia.
it's fuckin gross.
i think my favorite one i ever seen was this middle aged white lady going through her pristine mcmansion somewhere in suburbia, pulling the million curtains and locking the million doors, going "nighttime routine in appalachia!! 🤪🤪"
i could be wrong about this particular person--i didn't check their other tiktoks because im sick of them accounts and tired of giving them the benefit of the doubt--but it immediately came off as a transplant because:
1) mcmansion, 2) i dont know nobody here that locks their shit down like that (not locking up could even be argued as a part of my local culture, a reflection of our deep sense of community and trust in our neighbors).
and then the comments was all like "i don't know how you guys live there" and it actually broke my heart and pissed me off because even if--especially if--you're one of us, why the fuck are you harming us for likes? why are you turning people against us in a brand new way?
and to the transplants that do this--why?
you're not even from here, you moved here to this place you hate and made it worse just so your front porch would have a nice view, and are now benefiting socially from perpetuating bullshit about us?
you buy up all the land, land we often had no choice but to sell in the first place to survive instead of passing it on to our families, land we originally took from the indigenous peoples your content comes from.
you overdevelop it and turn it unrecognizable to make it more like the comfortable cities you come from. you gut a mountain town of its local businesses and cultures, you price people out of their homes...
...and then once you settle in all cozy like, you go tell everyone else how scary it is? how you can't trust the hills? like it's a cool paranormal bravery badge to wear? fuck off entirely.
so idk, in short my personal thoughts are: i personally enjoy a little myth as a treat, because the folklore is a part of the gothic, a part of our culture and a part of my childhood. i don't (intentionally) wield it as a weapon or use it as a pedestal to get the weird brand of attention that people like them are after.
and those who do this can get got by them haints for all i care.
#asks#appalachian culture#spooky appalachia#appalachian folklore#appalachian myth#appalachia#appalachian#txt
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can you do the sfw alphabet for benny too just because the prompts are soooo cute and fluffy 😭 part 2 was so good btw!!! ur v talented i’m jealous
TLDR: SFW alphabet! I borrowed the format from other SFW alphabets I've seen round here! Also lwky long sorry again guys. BUT HAPPY BDAY BEN DAY WOOHOOO
Warnings + Content Ahead: fem reader. SFW, mild swearing (that's my bad) - no real warnings, I don't think?
Azzie Notes ✚: HIII!! i love u sm. I fear...I'm writing part 3 of Game, Set, Match by popular demand (another surprise!) 😭😭 I'm so happy it's getting love tho, that's my first baby on here fr, she's doing well for herself!
I am NOT a good writer, I literally start writing and then jump ahead and on a whole other plot, it takes me ages to fill the plot in the middle. I just want them to kiss n shit bro wdymmm they need to flirt 😭? But ty sm for the compliments and the love!
Also Sorry I take SO long to write stuff bro but I really am swamped - IRL is STRESSSINGGG me out atm (I am FUCKED!), I love sitting here and writing and hashing everything over n over to make sure it's good and adding bits in and I'm not making any mistakes and all that. ANYWAYS!
Anyways, this should go wo saying: all assumptions and guesses, girl idfk anything!!! Shits lwky kinda canon, idk I’m just daydreaming!! Enjoy!
A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)
Ben’s not overly clingy, but he’s naturally affectionate in an easy, effortless way. In public, he loves to kiss your forehead, temples, or the top of your head. He might sling an arm around your shoulders or hold your waist when you’re together. He’s also big on playful touches, holding your hand, squeezing it gently, or resting his hand on your thigh while driving. He def likes it when you're holding onto his arm or leaning into him, it makes him feel good knowing you're reaching out for him just as much as he does for you. He’s tactile in a casual, unspoken way, always reaching out to connect with you.
He’d call you simple pet names or silly nicknames, nothing too over the top. When he’s talking about you in interviews or with friends, it’s always, “My baby did this” or “My girl said that” with that casual and proud tone that shows how happy he is to have you in his life and to show you off.
Ben’s love language is just as much about thoughtfulness as it is physical affection. He’s always on the lookout for things that will make you smile, whether that's chocolate that you both like or buying you Sonny Angel dolls or Miffy collectables when he’s on tour. When he gets back, he’ll sit you between his legs while you open them, playing along with you as you guess what’s inside, laughing at how happy you are. He'd feel like the world's best boyfriend seeing how excited and happy you are, like damn I did well this time, I need to do even better next time.
And if you need something for an event, like a dress or accessories, he’s on it immediately, finding the nicest options, and spoiling you with little jewellery pieces just because. I feel like he'd even download Pinterest and follow your boards so he knows what you're into and he'd walk into shops and stores showing them the Pinterest boards and your selfies, like "Okay so this is my girl, do you think she'd pick this?" He loves surprising you, especially when he knows you’ll be excited.
B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)
We all know Ben to be very agreeable and social amongst so many people so I think if you were to start off as friends, he'd be constantly trying to make you laugh, bantering, teasing you and have casual touches like bear hugs when he sees you, fist bumps, hi-fives; the whole lot.
I think he'd want his partner to be able to riff back and forth with him - make jokes, mock and trashtalk him a bit but also support him and keep him smiling. I imagine on his off days when he has a bunch of things to do, like cleaning his car and grocery lists, he'd want you to tag along and bribe you with food, not that you needed a bribe. As your friendship deepens, late-night deep convos where you both open and more intimate interactions are common, like leaning on his shoulder, hugging his arm, wrapping his arms around your shoulders or lying down on your lap.
C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)
I don't think Ben's the type to constantly initiate cuddling and spooning, but if you curl up beside him, his arms are around you instinctively and immediately.
After a tough match or a long stretch of tour, he might collapse onto the couch beside you, resting his head on your shoulder, craving your warmth. He loves it when you play with his hair or plant soft kisses on his head, it’s a quiet way for him to recharge.
On days when you’re feeling down, he’ll be the one letting you curl up on his chest, holding you close, rubbing your back, and kissing your temple.
During movie nights, he’ll keep an arm lazily draped across the back of your seat, his hand occasionally running down to your waist to pull you closer. He loves it when you rest your head on his shoulder, looking up at him with that soft smile that melts his heart every time.
D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)
Ben has said before that he can’t cook too well, but I think he’s downplaying it. He’s the type who can whip up something surprisingly good, especially if it’s a laid-back date night at home or after you’ve had a long day. His go-to (especially if you're rushing to college or work) is probably a smoothie—he makes a mean one.
But if he tried something delicious on tour and thought you’d love it, you can bet he’d try recreating it even if it takes way longer than it should. The recipe says 45 minutes? He’s probably spending three hours to make sure every little detail is perfect, especially if it’s for you. You might find him deep in concentration, the kitchen a bit messy, an apron poorly tied around his waist, but smiling at himself for nailing that final touch. He's even more proud when he sees you enjoying it.
On days when you’re cooking or baking, Ben’s your eager sous-chef. He’ll lean on the kitchen island, talking about his day, tasting what you’re making, and sneaking in little hugs from behind. Expect him to get playful and enthusiastic, acting like he’s in a cooking competition, throwing out “Yes, Chef!” and “Taste and stir? You got it, Chef!” with that cheeky grin of his.
When it comes to cleaning, though, he’s a bit more of a messy guy. You might find his sweaty kits or gear tossed on the floor after a long day of practice. But the minute you call him out, he’s on it, throwing it in the washing machine without hesitation, and eventually, he won’t even need to be told. He's just a big, goofy kid.
As for settling down, Ben wants it one day, but not just yet. He’s got a lot of life to experience with you by his side, whether it’s chasing adventures, or just living in the moment together. He loves the idea of marriage and kids down the line, but he wants to make sure that when that chapter comes, he’s ready and settled enough to be fully present. For now, he’s focused on making memories and achievements, but when the time is right, he’ll be all in for the next big step.
E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)
If Ben had to end a relationship, I think he’d do it with honesty and respect. He’s not one to ghost or avoid confrontation, so he’d sit down and have a mature conversation. He’d choose a calm, private space, somewhere that feels safe. He'd let you know that he cares and loves you but you're both in different directions with different needs. He would want to part on good terms. He’d make sure you feel heard and understood, and hope to stay civil and supportive.
F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)
Ben takes commitment seriously and doesn’t want to rush into it too fast. He wants to be sure of the relationship’s foundation before even thinking about marriage. He believes in growing together first.
Once he’s ready, though, he’d propose in a way that feels meaningful to both of you. No grand public gestures, just something intimate, maybe a quiet beach walk at sunset, or a cozy evening at home, where it’s just the two of you and the life you’ve built together.
I can imagine him getting your friends and family to help set it up, let them in on it and get their approval, but the moment would be about only you two, nothing and no one else.
G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)
Ben is incredibly gentle, both physically and emotionally like super, super sweet and kind. He’s always mindful of his strength and size, so his touches are light and tender, like brushing a strand of hair behind your ear or softly tracing your fingers when you hold hands. He'd talk to you in a softer voice than what he uses with his friends or during press conferences, he knows you hear him without needing all the extra noise or refined answers.
Emotionally, if Ben has learned anything from tennis, he’s more than patient and understanding. If you’re upset or feeling low, he’ll give you space to express yourself, asking, “Do you want to talk or just need a hug?” He’s always there, never pushing, but always ready to support you however you need. Even if he's away, he knows it can be hard and difficult but he'd send you gentle, sweet voice messages and videos, and if possible even call, just to remind you that you're always on his mind and in his heart.
H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)
Ben loves hugs, but they’re more of a casual, comforting thing than a constant need. He'd love the feeling of you hugging him, nestling and melting into him, your arm barely wrapping around him.
His bear hugs are warm, firm, and reassuring like he’s grounding you in the moment. He’ll give you a tight squeeze when he sees you after being apart or after a long day, pulling you close with a smile. If you’re having a rough time, his hugs linger a little longer, with a few kisses into your hair, making sure you feel safe. He’s not one to initiate a hug every five minutes, but when he does, it’s like being wrapped in warmth and love.
I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)
Ben wouldn't rush to say “I love you,” but once he’s sure of his feelings, he’s not afraid to express them. It’ll likely come out naturally during a quiet, intimate moment, maybe during pillow talk when you’re both just lying in bed, talking about everything and nothing with a few jokes that make you both tear up laughing, clutching your sides and sweet sentiments. “You know I love you, baby, right?” he’d say softly, his eyes soft and serious.
After that, he’d say it often, but always when it feels genuine, never just out of habit, but because he truly means it every time. He wouldn't be able to end a phone call or text you goodnight without saying it, and if you didn't say it, he's ringing you back until he hears it from you.
J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)
Ben is secure in himself and in your relationship, so jealousy isn’t a huge issue for him, he’s confident in what you share, but he’s definitely not above feeling a little territorial from time to time. Especially if someone’s getting too friendly with you. In those moments, you’ll feel his presence shift subtly, he’s stepping in closer, maybe pulling you by your waist or slipping his hand around your lower back, fingers pressing a bit more firmly than usual. A kiss on your cheek, sending a clear message without making a fuss.
He’s not one to let jealousy turn into drama, though. He’ll tease you about it later, flashing that grin of his, saying something like, "You just have that effect on people, don’t you?" with a playful wink, but there’s a glimmer in his eyes that tells you he’s serious about keeping what’s his. He’s protective of what’s his, especially when it comes to you. He likes knowing that people can see how much he cares about you and that you belong together. And when the world sees it, he feels even more secure in the bond you two share.
If it ever really bothered him, he wouldn’t bottle it up. Instead, he’d bring it up later in private, maybe when you're together after a long day. “Hey, just so you know, it got to me a little earlier. I know you didn’t do anything, but…” His voice would trail off, a little sheepish, but he’d look you in the eye, wanting to clear the air. You'd reassure him with words, kisses and cuddles.
He'd feel so good when you are talking about him or introducing him by calling him "my man" or "my boyfriend"; "my" anything really. It shows he's yours, just as much as you’re his. It’s a quiet reassurance for him, something that makes his chest swell a little every time. You’d probably notice that his mood lightens immediately, his arms pulling you in closer, maybe pressing a kiss to your forehead, mumbling something like, "Yeah, that’s right. I’m your man" with his big, gummy smile. He’d feel all the tension at ease, knowing that in your eyes, he’s your person, your only person, and that’s more than enough to keep him grounded.
K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)
He wouldn't often be the one to pepper you with kisses all the time, but after a great win or a long time without seeing you or sometimes, just because, he would kiss you all over.
Ben’s kisses are playful and sweet, starting as quick pecks that sometimes turn into more passionate moments when the mood is right and when you're both alone. He loves kissing your forehead or the top of your head, there’s something incredibly tender about it that feels both protective and loving. It’s his way of saying, “I’ve got you” without using words.
He’s also big on a quick peck of your cheek or lips when you’re least expecting it, just to get a smile out of you. He finds joy in kissing your nose, too, making it a little game where he tries to make you laugh, and you both end up giggling.
As for being kissed, he loves it when you surprise him with soft kisses on his jawline or neck. You’ll notice him pause, eyes closed, savouring the moment.
There’s a gentle smile tugging at his lips as he revels in the affection, a warmth spreading through him that speaks volumes about how cherished he feels. These little gestures mean the world to him; they’re reminders that he’s loved and adored.
He also enjoys being kissed in unexpected places. Like the small of his back when he’s cooking or when you lean in to whisper something silly in his ear and kiss his earlobe. Or perhaps, when you kiss his chest, telling him it's you "kissing his sweet and kind heart". It catches him off guard and fills him with joy, making him melt and pull you in for a tighter embrace. He’s all about those intimate, tender moments, especially when he can feel your love radiating through each kiss and sending shivers through him. Each one leaves a mark on his heart, creating a tapestry of affection that strengthens his pure adoration for you.
L = Little ones (How are they around children?)
No secret that he's great with kids! They prob gravitate to his silly personality and easy-to-climb frame, he's like a walking-talking jungle gym. It makes your heart swell seeing him sign tennis balls and photos for children at tournaments or when he's spending time with family, getting tackled and jumped by all the kids.
He’d be the type to show them how to ride a bike, to juggle or teach them some fun tennis tricks, maybe a little impromptu match in the backyard. Ben would be attentive and patient, showing them the ropes with a kind heart. I imagine with older kids, he'd approach them in the same way Bryan had with him; supportive and kind, never too pushing.
When Ben sees the joy in their eyes, it makes his day, and you can’t help but adore him even more watching him with kids, knowing he’d be an amazing dad someday.
M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)
Mornings with Ben are a beautiful blend of coziness when you get to spend them together. He’s not much of a morning person, but he loves waking up next to you. He's the type to set his alarm a bit earlier than necessary to spend his first few moments with you. His first instinct is to pull you closer, kiss your hair a few times, bury his face in your neck and inhale that comforting scent that makes the morning feel a bit brighter. He’d probably mumble something sweet, still half-asleep, cautious not to wake you up.
He’d take time to sit with you in the mornings during breakfast, talking about the day ahead or sharing funny stories from the previous day. He's just so happy to spend his first moments talking to the love of his life, he'd probably have a stupid smile on his face, never breaking eye contact.
If he’s on tour or has a busy schedule, he’ll make sure to carve out that little slice of the morning with you, maybe slipping a note in your bag or sending you a video in your timezone to wish you a good morning to remind you of how much he loves you.
N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)
Nights with Ben are all about winding down and enjoying each other’s company after a long day. He’d love to create a cozy atmosphere, dimming the lights, maybe lighting some candles or making popcorn for movie nights. You’d often find him on the couch with you, his arm draped around your shoulders as you watch a few episodes of your favourite shows, maybe even just watching TikToks together. He might tease you about your choices or how weird your FYP is, but he loves seeing your eyes light up as you share your favourites or laugh loud with your head thrown back.
On nights when he’s feeling particularly affectionate, he’d turn it into a stargazing adventure. If the weather’s nice, he’d grab a blanket, leading you outside to lay beneath the stars, pointing out constellations, and sharing silly stories about life on tour. He’d wrap you in his arms, resting his chin on your head, making you feel safe and cherished as you enjoy the tranquillity of the night.
If you’ve had a tough day, he’d be all about pampering you, running you a warm bath or preparing your favourite snacks, knowing that sometimes the little gestures mean the most. And when it’s time to sleep, he’d pull you close, his body instinctively finding yours as you drift off, feeling that warm sense of security and safety wrapped up in his embrace.
O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)
Ben takes his time when it comes to opening up, but he’s genuine about it. He's never faking his emotions or what's going on in his mind but some things would be kept away until he's ready and trusts you. I think he’s the kind of guy who enjoys those late-night conversations when the world feels quiet and safe, and that’s when you’d get to know the real him, the hopes he has, his fears, and what really drives him.
He’d probably start with lighter topics, like his favourite childhood memories or funny stories from the road, allowing you to ease into the more profound conversations naturally. As he sees your genuine interest in him, he’ll begin to reveal more, like his dreams for the future or moments that shaped him into who he is today. He’d appreciate your patience and understanding, wanting to feel secure in the connection before diving deeper into the heavier stuff. He'd want you to feel the same, ease him into the person you are today, with your fears, faults and all. Knowing you trusted him to share some of your troubles and past would make him feel incredibly warm, feeling your relationship grow tighter and closer. He'd never want you to go through anything like that when you're with him or feel those emotions again, so he'd be very conscious and make it a known effort.
P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)
Ben is generally laid-back and has a chill demeanour, especially since tennis made him that way to keep his cool, making it hard to rattle him. He’s the type to take a deep breath and laugh off minor annoyances, preferring to focus on the positives rather than letting small things get under his skin. He’d rather tease himself than get upset, often finding humour in the chaos, which makes him an excellent partner during stressful times.
However, if something really bothers him, he won’t shy away from addressing it. He believes in open communication and would prefer to have a calm conversation about what’s troubling him rather than letting it simmer inside. You’d find him sitting down with you, holding your hands and discussing feelings with sincerity. His patience extends to those he cares about, he understands that everyone has their off days and is more than willing to listen, offering support instead of anger.
Ben’s the type to remind you that it’s okay to feel frustrated or upset, and he’ll be there to help you work through it, showing that his patience isn’t just for himself but for you as well. He'd even take you to a rage room or find other outlets if you needed support.
Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)
I think Ben would have notes in his phone about you. If you mentioned something while he's on tour whether it's on call or text, it'd go straight into his notes. If you're giving him a shopping list while he's abroad (like, K-beauty products or Japanese stationary), you'd need to send photos and the full brand name and all, otherwise, the poor guy gets stressed and panic buys stuff.
If you asked him to run and get micellar water, he definitely bought all sorts of sparkling and still water in a panic. Or if you offhandedly mentioned that your period is coming up, he bought wayyyyy too many sanitary products because "how am I supposed to know what size you are?" - that's when you knew you had your work cut out for you, you have to be specific.
He would be on the plane, going through his notes, picking out what he'll be able to find, maybe books or bracelet charms alongside snacks you liked too. He'd take that role very seriously and it'd be so hard for him not to spoil the surprise and give you a haul of all the little things he bought for you; it'd get to a point that one of his bags would just be stuff for you, it was like Christmas when he came back.
You might find him surprising you with those details, like picking up your bagel and coffee order on a random day or planning a date around something you’ve casually mentioned wanting to try. It makes you feel seen and appreciated, knowing that he values your words enough to remember them. Like you might be doing errands together and then pull up to a place you wanted to try or craved and he'd shrug it off and be like "Oh, what? I just thought you'd want to try their new menu, just remembered you talking about it a few nights ago", but internally, he'd be giggling, fist bumping himself at surprising you again.
R = Remember (What is their favourite moment in your relationship?)
Ben’s favourite moment in your relationship is probably one that encapsulates all the love and joy you share together, something that solidifies you as a partner and his best friend. Maybe it was a spontaneous trip you both took, laughing the entire way, sharing silly snacks, and belting out songs in the car. Maybe the tyre was flat and you were both calm and making jokes about it, messing about while waiting for roadside assistance. Maybe it was playing doubles and having no strategy, just vibes and running all over the place (ahem, Arthur Fils and Ben, ahem). But whatever came your way, you both wouldn't find anger or frustration, you'd balance each other out and make a few jokes, and share a few kisses - you both knew everything was going to be alright.
He cherishes the quiet moments too, like those nights spent cuddled up, sharing your dreams and fears, realising how much you both mean to each other. It’s in those intimate exchanges that he finds solace and happiness, making every moment spent together feel significant.
S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)
I think Ben’s protectiveness is rooted in genuine care and affection. He’s not overbearing or controlling, but he’s very aware of your comfort and safety, especially when you're together in public and with his fame. If you're walking through a crowd, his hand is always on your lower back, guiding you carefully. If someone’s acting a little too bold, he’ll step in closer, stand a bit taller, and make it crystal clear that you’re with him, and he’s looking out for you. He's got you covered and doesn't need to do too much to make himself known as your partner.
At the same time, Ben loves it when you show care for him too. Maybe it’s the little things, like checking in after a rough match or reminding him to rest after training, gently massaging him after training, caring about if he ate - all the small things to check-in. He’d appreciate it when you link your arm with his in casual moments or hold his hand in public when you look up at him with your sweet eyes and smile or gently plant a kiss. It’s that unspoken connection that makes him feel secure, knowing you’ve got his back as much as he has yours.
T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)
I believe Ben’s the type who goes all-in. He might not always be extravagant, but everything he does is meaningful and well-thought-out, especially after it's been some time away.
For dates, whether it’s something simple like grabbing a pizza or something more special like a surprise picnic, he’ll plan it with you in mind, always tailoring things to your tastes. If it’s a special anniversary, expect him to remember all the little details, maybe even recreating your first date or trying to recreate a scene from a show or movie that you loved. He’s definitely the type to bring flowers, book reservations, and remember your favourite dessert or place to go.
He’s also great with gifts. He pays attention to the small things you mention, whether it’s that cozy sweater you’ve been eyeing or a quirky little item that made you smile. Sometimes, it is just something as small as having a sweet that you like in his pocket like it's "magic" (he forgot he put it there).
Everyday tasks don’t slip his mind; he’ll pitch in with chores, leave a small note, pack your bag for you or just help out in ways that show how much he cares.
U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)
I think Ben's biggest "ugly" trait is probably his occasional messiness, especially after practice or a match. He might leave his bag somewhere leave sweaty clothes lying around or forget to put his sneakers back where they belong. If he’s been travelling a lot, expect his suitcase to explode all over the bedroom before he finally unpacks, and even that would take you pleading with him to get working on that, which he will do with a pout.
He’s prob also guilty of being a bit too focused on his phone at times, like sitting there mouth agape and a protein bar or something in his hand that he forgot he was eating while he's scrolling through social media or watching match highlights when you just want his attention.
But the great thing about Ben is that if you call him out on it, he’ll listen and make an effort to fix it. He’s not one to get defensive about it; he knows his weaknesses and is willing to work on them.
V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)
Ben is definitely aware of how he looks (he knows he's fine as fuck), but he’s not vain in an excessive way. He likes to look good and feel confident, especially in front of a camera or at an event, but he’s not obsessed. He’s got his routines, probably a favourite cologne, a specific hair product he swears by to make his curls look good, but it’s all pretty chill. He’ll make sure his outfit’s on point and his shoes are clean, but he’s not going to spend hours in front of the mirror. He just cares to look good with and for you, nothing else.
He’s comfortable in his own skin and loves it when you appreciate his style too, but at the end of the day, he’s more focused on feeling good than being perfectly groomed. If he knows you love the way he looks in a certain outfit, he’ll definitely wear it more often just to see that smile on your face.
W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)
Ben is a confident, self-assured guy, but when it comes to you, you’ve become such a key part of his life that he’d definitely feel something missing if you weren’t there. You ground him in a way no one else can, bringing out his softer, more relaxed side and keeping him grounded. After a long tour or stressful match, you're the one he turns to for comfort and calm. He loves having you to share his successes and challenges with, and it’s clear he sees you as his other half.
When you’re away from each other, he’d miss all the little things, your laugh, the way you poke fun at him, the way you cuddle into his side, the way you play with his hair and shower him with words of affirmation. Ben’s a big believer in partnership, and having you around makes him feel like he’s not just navigating life alone but with someone who’s always on his side. So yeah, without you, he’d feel incomplete, like something’s missing from his daily rhythm but it wouldn't be a crippling thing.
X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)
So, Ben talked about how he had never been abroad before tennis, I like to think of him being an appreciative guy so I imagine him collecting memorabilia from his tours. Things like lanyards, tickets, wristbands, photos, and even quirky items he finds in hotels from different countries. He probably has a little keepsake box that he fills up with mementoes from the places he’s been, and he loves sharing these memories with you or telling you stories about those things.
When you’re together, he’ll pull out random souvenirs and tell you the stories behind them, maybe even jokingly offering to “trade” you one of his old match wristbands for one of your trinkets. If you offered to make him a scrapbook and document his silly stories, he'd probably hold that so, so close to his heart, maybe even well up a bit knowing you were gentle and careful in documenting it all.
He loves bringing something from you with him on his travels, whether it's your silly pink headband that you use when you're doing your skincare or a hair tie around his wrist. Whenever he gets the chance, he'll send you silly photos and texts wearing or holding those items, telling you that he misses you.
Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)
Ben is generally easygoing, but there are a few things that would rub him the wrong way. He doesn’t like unnecessary drama negativity or toxicity, he’s all about keeping things light and fun, so constant complaining or bad vibes would get under his skin. He also wouldn’t appreciate dishonesty or being led on with games. He values trust and transparency in a relationship especially if he's serious, and if he felt like someone was being shady or playing with his emotions, he’d check out pretty quickly. He doesn't have the time to be doing all that while on tour.
I think he also wouldn’t be into someone who’s overly controlling or doesn’t give him his space. Ben enjoys his independence and time with friends, so he’d need a partner who respects that balance and doesn’t try to keep him on too tight a leash.
Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)
Deadass prob sleeps like a rock. Ben is the type of guy who falls asleep fast and stays asleep, once he’s out, he’s out. He loves curling up next to you in bed, and he’ll probably drape an arm over you in his sleep, unconsciously pulling you closer. He’s a deep sleeper, and if he’s had a tough day of training or a long match, he might snore lightly, maybe even sleeptalks a bit.
He likes it when you run your fingers through his hair while he’s falling asleep and murmur words of affirmation and love. It relaxes him instantly, and he’ll murmur little thank-yous, kiss your skin softly or give sighs of contentment until he drifts off completely. If he wakes up in the middle of the night, he’ll check on you, making sure you’re comfortable and pulling the blanket over you if it’s slipped off, making sure you're nice and tucked in. Ben might also wake up early, but he’ll stay in bed a little longer, just lying there next to you, content in the quiet moments of the morning.
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super interesting to read your takes on Epic! was wondering if you ever read Madeline Miller's Circe and if yes, what were your thoughts on it?
Yes, I’ve read Circe. I actually read a PDF online, but I recently found the actual book! Not that it was a smart decision to waste money on a book I’ve already read, but eh...What’s a girl to do... Anyway, it’s fine, I guess, if you’re into that sort of thing. Y’know, the whole “I took a Greek myth and turned it into a sanitized Pinterest board” vibe. Madeline Miller’s writing? Solidly meh. It’s not the revelatory prose the internet insists it is, but sure, it’s readable. Circe is, at its core, an interpretation of myth tailored for modern consumption. It’s accessible, marketable, and easy for readers to feel clever about loving. That’s fine! But it’s not the tour de force some fans seem to think it is.
Miller’s prose is polished, sure, but it’s also overly workshopped. It’s the kind of writing you’d expect from someone who graduated at the top of her MFA class, not from someone channeling the raw energy of myth. Myths are messy, strange, and wild. Miller’s style, in comparison, feels sanitized and controlled, like she’s so afraid of losing her grip on the narrative that she cuts away anything that might add texture or complexity. It’s the literary equivalent of a curated Instagram feed: nice to look at, but lacking depth.
Then there’s Circe herself. Miller does try to give her more agency, and I respect the effort to center her voice in a way the original myths didn’t. But the execution? Kind of frustrating. Circe starts out promising — turning men into pigs is such an iconic power move, and her fury feels righteous. But just when we think she’s found her strength, here comes Odysseus, and suddenly the narrative shifts. She’s no longer the fearsome witch-goddess carving out her own place in the world; she’s softened by the love of a clever man. And let’s be real: Odysseus isn’t just any man. He’s a walking bundle of red flags, even by Greek myth standards. He lies, manipulates, and cheats, and yet somehow, we’re supposed to believe that after Circe has been burned by men over and over again, this is the guy she opens her heart to? It’s not just about him, though — it’s what his arrival represents. The story moves from “Circe standing on her own” to “Circe defined by her relationship with Odysseus.” And for a book marketed as a feminist retelling, that feels like such a cop-out. And then...Telemachus.
I get why Miller paired him with Circe. Symbolically, it works. He’s everything Odysseus never was. Their relationship is clearly meant to be this balm, a quiet resolution after all the stormy chaos of Circe’s life. And I’ll admit, it’s sweet in a way that sneaks up on you. But does it feel entirely earned? Not really. The thing is, their bond develops too neatly, almost like it’s checking off a box labeled “Happy Ending.” Telemachus shows up, all sweet and thoughtful, and we’re supposed to believe Circe would just open her heart to him after everything she’s been through? I’m not saying she doesn’t deserve love, she absolutely does, but where’s the tension? Where’s the hesitation? This is a woman who’s spent centuries in isolation, surviving betrayal after betrayal. Shouldn’t there be a little more conflict in letting someone like Telemachus in, no matter how gentle he is?
That said, I can’t deny the appeal. Telemachus stepping away from his father’s shadow and finding peace with Circe does have a certain poetic justice to it. And the moments between them are undeniably tender — there’s a quiet power in the idea of two scarred people finding solace in each other. It’s just that, for all its cuteness, their relationship feels more like an epilogue than an integral part of the story. It’s nice, and it is sweet, but it doesn’t quite feel alive. Telegonus is...a plot device. Literally I do not care half as much as I should for him, so I honestly have no idea what to even say for him here. He could and should have been better. Sure, Telegonus is the catalyst for some major events, but he himself feels oddly passive in his own story. He’s the one who accidentally kills Odysseus, yet the emotional fallout of that act barely scratches the surface. Instead, the focus shifts back to Circe and Telemachus, leaving Telegonus as this loose end that never quite gets tied up. Not normally, at least. He’s there to serve Circe’s arc, not to have one of his own. And for someone with his parentage, that feels like a waste.
What really irks me, though, is the missed opportunity. The premise of Circe is so good: a witch cast out by the gods, building her life from scratch and dealing with the fallout of her choices. There’s so much room for nuance and exploration there — of power, isolation, anger, and what it means to be both divine and deeply human. But Miller doesn’t lean into those themes as much as she could. Instead, the story often feels like it’s ticking off a checklist of tropes to make Circe “relatable” to a modern audience.
To be clear, I’m not saying Miller needed to write a hyper-accurate mythological treatise. Adaptations are allowed to take liberties! But they should still engage with the source material in a way that feels authentic, not just convenient. Instead of grappling with Circe’s contradictions — her cruelty and compassion, her power and her vulnerability — Miller smooths over those edges to make her more palatable. Circe is fine. It’s a decent book if you’re looking for a cozy entry point into Greek myths, but it’s not the radical, feminist reclamation it’s often made out to be. It takes some of the most interesting elements of Circe’s story and waters them down into something more comfortable, more easily consumed. Which, hey, works for a lot of people! But if you’re looking for a Circe who’s truly complicated, messy, and unyielding, you’ll have to go back to the myths, or write your own. It’s cute, it’s tidy, and it’s easy to love, but myths, in my opinion, should be anything but. Working on my own little retelling of the Odyssey, and I just hope it will not end up like a mess.
#the odyssey#greek mythology#odysseus#circe#telemachus#telegonus#circe madeline miller#madeline miller
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ST5 STUFF FROM MICHAEL MAHER’S PINTEREST BOARD
So I saw this post about Matt’s pinterest boards & Michael Maher Jr collaborating on some of the boards, and so, I went to go peek at Michael Maher Jr’s pinterest page, and I found something very interesting- a Pinterest board titled “Tree Flayer”:
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Which a.) this makes me think of the ST3 scene of Holly seeing the trees moving when the Fleshflayer is moving through them and b.) makes me think of the MF’s general tree-like shape, especially the red MF visuals in TFS with how it branches off- and it also makes me think of c.) something I’ve been on about for a Long Time- that official ST concept art of the green version of the UD with the giant tree and how it parallels Greenwood the Great (pre-shadow Mirkwood) from LOTR/the Hobbit:
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This is why I’m very much inclined to believe that this “Tree Flayer” pinterest board is, in fact, for ST5, and not for onenof Michael’s other projects.
And brings me back to a very old draft I’ve been working on re: oak trees as a recurring motif in ST, especially surrounding the Creels.
And speaking of oak trees and the creels, Michael also had this “seed-rock-henry” board, versus The Hobbit movies being confirmed inspo & Bilbo’s acorn & the Oak tree on top of Bag End vs all of the Oak tree references with the Creels & the parallels between the Creels and Bag End:
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And this ^ “seed-rock-henry” thing also has me staring directly at the weird “egg” from S1 that we see with the Demogorgon…
And then, there’s a bunch of other boards too, including a board titled “Seeker” with a ton of cool stuff on it, as well as stills from two movies that are on the ST4 board and have Henward connections (Bladerunner and Dont Breathe) , and this “Seeker” board also has so many creatures that seem to be like a mixture of the ST Doppelgorgon and Vecna and the MF etc vs what I’ve been saying re: the overlap between all of these creatures & my current draft about that + Massacre Henward likely being a Doppelgorgon creature vs the overlap between Doppelgorgons and the MF/being the “same creature” somehow.
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Like, the inspo on here has stuff thats very clearly Doppelgorgon inspired and Vecna inspired by also has a ton of MF-inspired stuff like wraiths & ringwraiths & weird spider creatures…. And “Seeker” is also a type of Warlock in DND which is a WHOLEEEEE other can of worms on its own.
And not to mention that there’s ANOTHER board titled “Asylum- Seeker” which LITERALLY HAS A PICTURE OF PENNHURST ON IT:
And then there’s also a “seeker- plantations” board which is Very interesting considering the racial aspects of ST & TFS & things like Hawkins High in TFS not being segregated despite supposedly being in the 50s, and the 1800s stuff with The Dark of the Moon…..
And there’s also this whole “seeker lookbook” board that has SCREENSHOTS OF THE ST LAB SCENES IN ITTT
There’s SO much more i could say & that I’m going to say in future posts but I just wanted to get this post out there quickly!!!!
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HeadCannons 🧡💛
Full Masterlist Lando Masterlist
• forehead kisses. He loves giving you forehead kisses, he usually will when your in public since he knows your not a huge fan of having an actual kiss in front of a whole crew of cameras-
• Him pulling your..his hat down, whether it be when your talking or he’s about to walk away, before he does he will hit the brim of your hat down so you can’t see anything. You huff as he laughs walking away, it’s the little things that make your relationship the best. 🧡💛
•Him reminding you to drink 24/7 - since he knows how forgetful you are he also keeps alarms on his phone and yours, every morning he goes on your phone and turns them on to make sure since again he knows your forgetful
• he also has developed a sixth sense because of your clumsiness, which he calls his “soulmate connection” - like the times when you are about to fall over and he instantly has his arm there to catch you, his insanely quick reflexes play into it a lot too.
Or when you drop something on the floor and you bend down to grab it and lando holds his hand over the corner of the table or desk to make sure you don’t hit your head. “Got it?” He asks and you nod with a “mhm” and he carries on with his conversation before moving his hand making you grin at his protectiveness.
• I think he’d love going on streams with you, sometimes you say no but that’s only if you have something important to do so other than that you say yes every time. Filly and Ginge absolutely love you and always banter with you.
•he is a total 🍒 and 🍑 guy - if he had to pick between the two options he’d choose death. Especially if its yours 😉
• He also loves when you ask him to help you choose what to wear - whether it’s earrings, a bracelet or a dress? He loves it. And of course he always picks the necklace with his initials on that he got you for your anniversary
• You both agreed you wanted to wait a couple years before getting married, but he did get you a promise ring, he even went to the lengths of looking at your Pinterest boards. It was a silver ring and on the inside it had “Lando Norris” engraved. Along with the one he got for himself that had “Y/n Y/l/n” engraved on the inside too.
•He would always prefer having you at races with him, you could calm him better than anyone else. He knew that if you were there it was going to be a good race and a good day.
• Cuddles. that’s it. I don’t even have to explain.
•He wouldn’t be able to sleep without you, when he was away in a different country he would FaceTime you and you’d talk to him as he fell asleep, and you’d stay on FaceTime all night until your phone died.
Also obviously taking screenshots of him-
•He absolutely adores you and is such a simp, he will pay for everything and make you the happiest passenger princess ever.
•He would kill for your head massages. He loves when you play with his hair when you’re cuddling on the sofa,in bed or even when he’s on stream. Sometimes he has to end the stream because of it. He loves it. 🧡💛
•You also race and He literally is so paranoid. And gets so protective. He makes them check your seatbelt MULTIPLE TIMES. And it’s so tight you can’t breathe! Or he will make his engineer give him updates to make sure your okay literally during the race.
•You’re his biggest fan girl. His fans love you- obviously some don’t and are jealous. But overall they adore you, they love when you post him for example after you guys went on stream and went to bed to cuddle and watch something he fell asleep. And he looked adorable. He was snuggled into you and was snoring, your blanket over him, so you obviously took a picture and posted onto your public instagram with the caption: I CANT. MY BEAUTIFUL BOY
And let’s just say his fans agreed with you, they always agree you’re one of them and is his biggest fan. 🧡💛 he loves that his fans love you.
These head cannons are all my personal opinions so if you don’t agree with them then don’t comment about it 😌
#lando norris#lando norris x reader#lando norris imagine#lando x reader#lando imagine#lando x you#Landonorris#fanfic#x reader#imagine#imagines#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x oc#lando norris x female driver#headcanon#beahf1
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