#i literally gasped out loud when i read this cause i’ve always tried to figure what it sounded like

[cruesuffix]

this fucking asshole i KNEW that shit sounded familiar!!

[squiggledrop]

Lies - Spencer Reid x Reader

Masterlist

Summary: Reader and Spencer are dating, but when Reader sees him with someone else, she becomes extremely self- conscious and ignores him. Spencer tries to figure out what he did wrong.

Word Count: 2.7k

Pairings: Spencer Reid x Reader

Category: Angst, Fluff

Warnings: Mentions of anxiety, panic attacks, being self-conscious

Notes: literally just me writing down all my insecurities so

Salty tears hit the cold tiles of the hotel bathroom floor. With your back against the tub and your head in your hands, you let yourself succumb to the voices in your head. You thought you had been doing better, sure some days were worse than others, but you felt like you were making progress. But now, after having your heart obliterated by the man you love so deeply, all of your insecurities darted throughout your brain, pounding at the sides of your head. 

You felt like such an idiot. Of course he would find someone else. How could you have let yourself believe he really loved you when there were so many women out there who were better looking and more fun to be around. Why would anyone want to be with someone who was as self-conscious and shy as you? Spencer deserved someone who wouldn’t shy away from taking pictures with him because you hated the way you looked or cancel plans dinner plans because the thought of anyone but him seeing you made you nauseous. That’s why it didn’t surprise you when you saw the way he flirted with that police officer today. 

You were reading through some case files with Spencer when he noticed your coffee cup was empty. He had gotten up to get you a refill, which you smiled and thanked him for. You watched as his tall, lean body walked over to the coffee machine. He brushed his dark curls out of his face as he waited for the mug to fill. You knew you should be working to find the unsub, but you couldn’t pull your eyes away from the man in the purple cardigan. You softly chuckled to yourself as you scanned down to his dirty converse, where his mismatched socks peeked through the bottom of his mahogany pants. You bit back a smile as you took in the sight of your adorable boyfriend. You were so lucky to have him. He knew about your mental health struggles and always supported you, which you were thankful for. But, that still didn’t relieve any of the guilt you had at making him put up with you. That’s why, when you saw him laughing the way he always laughs with you, due to something that extremely beautiful cop just said to him as she placed her hand on his arm, your world shattered.

You know Spencer did nothing wrong and that he was just being his quirky, lovable self, but, seeing how she made him smile caused you to think how much better off he would be with someone like her. She probably didn’t have panic attacks at night that made his tired eyes sulk into his head even more. She would probably love to wear a beautiful dress out to dinner so he could show her off. She could probably make him so much happier than you ever could. Your mind swarmed with voices telling you how you weren’t enough and that Spencer probably resented you. You tried to focus on the papers in front of you and reassure yourself that you were being irrational and that it was all your head, but it was no use. Your anxiety consumed you, drowning you in all of your insecurities. You tried to gasp for air, but all you could do was sit idly by as you watched the man of your dreams flirt with a beautiful woman through the tears that swelled in your eyes.

When Spencer returned with your coffee he set it down and placed a kiss to the top of your head. You wanted nothing more than to hug him and feel his reassuring body consume you, but you didn’t want him to see your tears, so you remained silent with your head down.

“Hey, is everything okay?” he asked, concern lacing his voice. You bit your lip and couldn’t think of anything to say. “(Y/n), talk to me. What’s up?” He reached out to touch your arm in hopes of getting you to answer him, but you flinched at the contact. “I’m-I’m sorry”, he stammered, terrified he had done something wrong.

“I-I have to go help JJ”, you said softly, as you bolted out of the room, making sure he couldn’t see your tear-stained cheeks.

“(Y/n)...”, he called after you, standing up. You couldn’t bring yourself to put all of your problems on him, just to make him feel bad for doing nothing wrong, so you kept your head down as you walked out of the precinct. Spencer followed you, calling out your name, but you got into the black SUV and sped away before he could even make it to the door.

You avoided Spencer for the rest of the day. You hated yourself for ever letting your mind convince you Spencer would cheat on you, and you hated yourself even more for how guilty you were making him feel by not talking to him about how guilty you felt for thinking it. Spencer tried to talk to you, but you kept brushing him off, his devastated face making you hate yourself even more. You didn’t deserve him. He deserved someone who made him feel as amazing as you knew he was. He didn’t deserve to be treated like this, but you didn’t know what to do. You would hurt him if you talked to him about it, but you were hurting him by saying nothing too.

“Hey, is (y/n) okay?” Derek asked Spencer as they were on their way to the most recent dumpsite.

“I don’t know. She was fine one second and then all of a sudden completely shut me out. She won’t even look at me… I don’t know what I did. I just, I need to make sure she’s okay.” Derek gave him a sympathetic smile as he placed a reassuring hand on Spencer’s shoulder.

“I’m sure she’ll come around. I know she struggles with some stuff, but, you are the only person I’ve seen make her smile as big as she does when she’s with you”, Spencer gave a thankful nod in return. “And in any case, I always find flowers and some chocolate are always a good idea when a woman is giving you the silent treatment”, Spencer rolled his eyes as Derek chuckled.

When you all regrouped at the station later that night, Hotch had told everyone to head back to the hotel so you could start fresh the next morning. As everyone was leaving, Spencer chased after you, reaching for your hand, but you pulled it away. In defeat, he let you go and the two of you rode in separate cars back to the hotel for the first time since you joined the team three years ago. On the way there, Spencer replayed every moment from the day in his head over and over, trying to figure out what happened to make you so upset. He hated seeing you hurt like this, and all he wanted to do was take away your pain.

Once at the hotel, everyone went their separate ways to get some much-needed rest. You walked about ten paces ahead of Spencer, not daring to let him see you. When you made it to the room, you tried to use the key card, but the door wouldn’t open. Ugh! I can’t even work a stupid door! you mentally yelled at yourself. Seeing your struggle caused Spencer’s face to fall and his heart to clench.

“Here, you just have to-”, he said softly as he took the card and opened the door. Without acknowledging him, you pushed through into the room. Spencer slowly closed the door, before turning around to face you. You had your back to him, sitting on the edge of the far bed, opening your bag to get ready for bed. “(Y/n), please talk to me”, he begged. After not receiving any form of a response, you heard him walk towards you and, without thinking, you snapped.

“Just leave me alone!”, you said, definitely loud enough for the entire floor to hear.

“(Y/n)...”, he chocked out, tears running down his face.

“Just go! I don’t want to talk to you.” Your enraged voice hid the sadness you felt, and your heart sunk even lower as you heard Spencer huff as he closed the door behind him. You finally let the tears fall that you had been holding back the entire car ride. You walked into the bathroom, not wanting him to see you like this in case he came back. That’s when you realized it: if he came back. Your stupid self had pushed Spence away for no reason and now he was gone. You cursed yourself for hurting the man who had done nothing but love you and care for you. At least now you knew the voices were right. You didn’t deserve Spencer. At least now he could find someone whose beauty complemented his. Someone who was confident, smart, and made him feel loved. You sank down on to the cold tiles and wished that you could have been enough for him because he deserved the world.

You didn’t notice when the hotel door opened, because all you could hear were your loud sobs and the voices telling you how much happier Spencer must be now that you weren’t there to bother him. You only noticed he was standing in front of you when you heard his gasp at the sight of you on the floor. You looked up to see him standing there, tears streaming down his face matching yours, with a box of your favorite chocolates and the most beautiful bouquet of flowers you had ever seen in his hands. A pit formed in your stomach and you began to cry even harder. You were so undeserving of this man. After you had ignored him for the whole day and yelled at him to leave, he decided to go out and buy you gifts, and all you could do was cry. He came and sat next to you, causing you to shift away from him, not wanting to meet his gaze. 

“Look, I know you don’t want to talk to me, and that’s okay. But, please, just listen to me”, after not receiving any form of response from you, he continued, “(Y/n), I have been replaying everything that happened today, trying to figure out what I did. I’m so sorry for whatever it was that hurt you this bad. I want you to know I would never intentionally do anything to hurt you. I love you so much. You mean the world to me.” He paused for a moment to quickly wipe a tear off his cheek. “I got you these because Derek said it always worked for him. I just- I want you to tell me what’s wrong so I can apologize and try to fix it.” You closed your eyes, his words making you feel even worse about yourself. After all the pain you put him through today, he was the one apologizing to you. You didn’t understand how someone so perfect could say they love someone who was anything but.

“Spencer…”, he looked up at you with his big, sad eyes, “I’m so sorry”, you choked out. “I don’t deserve you. I’m so sorry”, you cried.

“Hey, no no no. Don’t say that”, he said as he brought you into his arms, grateful that you finally let him touch you. “I love you so much, and you deserve everything and more, okay?”

“No, I don’t! I’m a terrible girlfriend, and I hurt you and made you cry. I ignored you and you repaid me by bringing me gifts.” You pulled away from him and looked him in the eyes. “Why are you even with me when you deserve so much better?”

“How could you even say that”, he looked genuinely hurt.

“Because! I’m stupid and annoying and I’m no fun to be around, and you are so great and you should be with someone who is pretty and likes to go out and have fun and doesn’t get anxious, or-”, at that, Spencer knew what was really going on.

“(Y/n), why didn’t you tell me you were feeling like this. You know I would have been there for you. I know it’s hard, but you can’t listen to the voices telling you lies okay? They are wrong, they are so so wrong.” He cupped your face and ran his thumb across your cheek, “I know you don’t always see it, but you are the most beautiful person I have ever met, inside and out. You are the only person who will listen to my rambles and you are my favorite person to spend time with. You are my entire world, (y/n). You are more than enough.”

“But that’s not true!” “Yes. It is.”

“What about that police officer today. The really beautiful tall one? She made you laugh and your eyes lit up the same way they do when you are with me.” 

“(Y/n)-” Spencer was about to interject but you continued over him.

“And I know you would never cheat on me or do anything to purposefully hurt me. And you did absolutely nothing wrong and I’m so sorry for hurting you when you did nothing to deserve it. It’s just, whenever I see you with another girl, I think about is how easily she could take you away for me. All I’m saying is that I would understand if you did leave me for someone prettier and more fun, like her, because you deserve someone who makes you happy and not someone like me who makes your life harder.” You were both silent for a moment before Spencer took your hands in his.

“Please look at me”, you did as he asked and painfully met his gaze, “I don’t want anyone but you. You are a ray of sunshine in my life. You make me the happiest I have ever been, even when I know you struggle to see yourself how I see you. You are never a burden to me, okay? I want you to always tell me what’s going on in your head because your problems are my problems, and nothing would make me happier than helping you and supporting you through them. I don’t care that sometimes we change our plans and just stay in because my favorite place in the world is snuggling with you on the couch. I don’t care that sometimes you wear my sweatpants and t-shirts because you don’t like how your clothes look on you because I think you look adorable and I feel so lucky to have a girlfriend as beautiful as you. I don’t care that we don’t always take a picture every time we go out on a date because I have an eidetic memory and don’t need a physical picture to get to see all of our memories together whenever I want. And I don’t care that sometimes you get anxious and your mind convinces you that you aren’t good enough because I know how amazing you are and I’ll always be there to help you through it and remind you of much I love you.” By now you were sobbing again, but this time they were happy tears. Spencer pulled you into his chest, as you breathed in his warm scent that instantly comforted you. 

“I love you”, you mumbled into his shirt.

“I love you. So much”, he said, placing a kiss to your cheek.

“And Spence?” You asked, lifting your head up, placing your hands in his hair.

“Yeah?”, he said, looking up at you with lust-filled eyes as he rested his hands on your hips.

“Thank you for loving me”, you smiled, your heart so full you thought it would burst.

“Thank you for letting me love you”, he brought you in for a gentle, yet passionate kiss and you melted into him. Although you knew you would always have rough days like today, as long as you had Spencer there to hod your hand, you knew you would be okay.

[sokkas-honour]

Let’s say #10 of the Spotify wrapped writing for Korra :)

ANON HOW DID YOU KNOW

girls - korra x reader

pairing: korra x fem!reader

wc: 1.7k with lyrics

warning/notes: i can’t think of anything, but if there is fee free to message me!

taglist (message me/fill out form): @draqondance @biqherosix

i've been hiding for so long, these feelings, they're not gone, can i tell anyone?

you stared at her from across the room, god she was beautiful. the way she laughed and joked around with your brother made you heart soar, the sheer sound of her joy making your day.

you snapped out of your staring when your older brother came by, a stack of empty boxes in his arms as he dropped them on the ground, the thump getting your attention.

“oh thank god you found the boxes mako.” you sighed in relief at the fear of not finding the boxes to put back all the decorations used for varrick and zhu li’s wedding.

“they were in ikki’s room for some reason.” makos discovery caused a laugh to come out, your brother following your lead.

“how in the world did they end up there?” you wondered as you grabbed some of the decorations off the tables and placed them delicately into one of the boxes.

“no idea.” he answered, taking the decorations off of the other tables and copying you.

“you two need some help?” you felt your cheeks heat up and heart pick up as you heard the voice of the woman you loved dearly. you met her eyes and smiled.

“i wouldn’t say no to it.” you joked, smile growing bigger as you watched her laugh.

mako called bolin over for help as korra worked on the same tables as you did. working in unison, your hands accidentally landed on top of each other’s as you grabbed the same center piece, a blush erupting on both of your cheeks.

once you were done and your brothers went to bring the majority of the boxes to where varrick wanted them to, you were left alone with your girlfriend.

“i saw you staring before, you’re not very discreet.” korra teased once the both of you were alone which just made heat rush to your cheeks which just made her laugh at your flustered expression.

“yeah well youre insanely cute when you laugh.” you answered, arms wrapping around her waist and head being placed on her chest as you breathed in her comforting scent.

“i’m always cute.” she joked, earning a small chuckle from you as you looked up to her, loving smile adorning her face.

when you thought you heard someone coming, you quickly unwrapped yourself and jumped back, afraid of them seeing you two hug. you looked around frantically only to find that you were still alone. with a sigh of relief, you returned your attention to the avatar whos expression had changed to one of slight disappointment.

“y/n, we can’t keep sneaking around like this. one day or another, we should tell the others. you especially should come out to your brothers.” she sighed. you two had gotten together right after defeating kuvira but she had come out a while before leaving for the south pole after zaheer.

it hurt korra to see you living some sort of double life, lying to your brothers who tried to get you to bring someone to th wedding about you seeing someone, your brothers still fully thinking that you were only interested in men which would be the opposite of the truth.

“i know, i’ll tell them one day but i just, don’t know when.” you shrugged off your concerns and told a white lie to the girl in front of you.

afraid of what they'll say, so i push them away, i’m acting so strange

“y/n, you’re not telling the truth. i’m your girlfriend, we may have only been together for a little over two weeks but we’ve been friends for years, i can tell when you’re lying.” she informed, placing her hand over yours that was limp next to your hip. you grabbed onto it and sighed, you knew you were going to caught and have to voice your fears eventually but some part of you had hoped that your girlfriend wasn’t as smart as she said she was, she unfortunately wasn’t.

“sometimes i forgot how much of a genius you are.” you smiled half heartedly as she looked at you concerned, wanting to know the reason why you were still in the closet after supposed years of knowing your sexuality.

“babe come on, you can tell me.” she insisted, giving your hand a little squeeze from encouragement.

you took a deep breath in and let it out it, coming yourself in order to tell your girlfriend the reason why you hadn’t come out yet.

“i just. i don’t know how mako and bolin will react.” you finally admitted, feeling as though a huge weight was lifted from your shoulders when suddenly, the girl in front of you starting laughing. you quirked an eyebrow, wondering why the hell was she laughing.

“y/n! you saw how they reacted when i came out! they were completely and utterly fine with it! hell they were super supportive of me!” she reasoned once her laughter died down.

“i know but i’m their sister, it’s different.”

“no y/n it isn’t. why would it be any different.” she asked, confused at your stupid reasoning:

“i mean for one, they’re going to be mad i never told them anything, especially since i’ve already dated a girl or two. two, they might find it a tad bit weird when we tell them we’re dating.”

“well your first reason could’ve been avoided if you’d told them in the first place.” she pointed out, earning a small blush from you. “and second, they won’t, trust me. mako might be a bit stunned but he’ll be 100% supportive, don’t even get me started on bolin.”

“you’re right, i should probably tell them.” you sighed in defeat, head turning slightly to stare at the building on air temple island where your brothers probably were.

“if you want ill be there.” she proposed, her free hand placing itself on your cheek to which you gladly leaned into.

“yeah, i’d like that.”

they're so pretty, it hurts, im not talking 'bout boys, I'm talking 'bout girls, they're so pretty with their button-up shirts.

after dinner, mako, bolin, and you were on kitchen duty to clean the dishes, giving you the perfect opportunity to finally come out to your brothers and stop hiding.

as you finished drying a plate, you decided that it was time. especially since bolin was bringing up the idea of setting you up with someone.

“okay so y/n, i found this great guy that you’ll love. super sweet, super nice, super good looking, bolin approved guy.” your younger brother told you, scrubbing the food off one of the dishes.

“that’s nice bo but i’ve got something to tell you both.” in an almost perfect synchronised moment, both of them stopped what they were doing and turned to you. with both of their eyes on you, you froze a bit.

“sure y/n, what’s up?” mako encouraged, seeing your slightly stunned state and helping you snap out of it.

“i’m gay.” you blurted out. mentally smacking yourself for saying it so bluntly and straight to the point.

“knew it.” mako smirked as bolin let out a big ‘ohhhhh’.

“okay then, i think i know this one really nice, sweet, bolin approved girl that i believe also likes girls.” the earthbender quickly responded, correcting his previous date proposition to adjust it to the news.

“thanks bo but that’s not necessary.” you smiled gratefully at the youngest of you three before turning your attention to the eldest.

“what makes you say that mako?” you inquired, curious as to why your brother wasn’t very surprised at the news.

“well um, i.” mako stumbled over his words, slightly unsure of how to go about it but he recomposed himself. “i think you forget that as your older brother, i was able to see things that you didn’t.”

“go on, i’m intrigued.” it was now your turn to smirk.

“at first it was probably the constantly stealing mom’s kyoshi book, only to stare at the pictures of kyoshi warriors.” he joked.

“hey i still know a lot about kyoshi warriors!” you protested, half joking about the reason why you were addicted to the book.

“yeah but i literally walked into your room when you were about five only to see you open at the same page for a solid ten minutes. also, you couldn’t read!”

“i’m surprised mako caught any of it because it’s news to me. good news though!” bolin inserted himself back into the conversation, a cheery grin on his face.

“i think the longing stares between you and that waterbender from the red sands rabaroos could’ve also been an indication. and the constant cheering for them.” mako teased, resuming his dunking of plates in the water.

“yeah, umi and i didn’t last too long but it was fun while it lasted.” you reminisced over your first girlfriend, and followed your brothers lead to return to drying plates, leaving a dumbfounded brother to connect the dots.

“wait, you dated someone in an enemy team? y/n!” bolin gasped, accusing you in a joking manor.

“guilty as charged.” you smirked.

“okay well, let me set you up with someone! i’m sure i know another lesbian or bisexual!” bolin persisted with his idea so you thought that you might as well come out about korra and you.

“well bo, mako, i’m kinda seeing someone right now.” you started but were interrupted by someone barging in, the exact person you were about to mention.

“are you idiots done yet? we figured we’d all go see a probending match tonight but if you slowpokes aren’t done we might miss it!” korra informed the three of them. the two boys quickly returned to work but your gaze lingered on the avatar.

“so are you going to tell us or?” mako asked as korra left.

“i think you’ll figure it out.” your eyes stayed a little too long in the direction that your girlfriend left, a smirk on your lips at the idea of making your brothers wait.

when you all made your way to the probending arena, you caught up with korra and asami in the front, making sure to interlock your fingers with the watertribe girl.

“im guessing you told them?” asami asked, a knowing smile on her face at the romantic gesture.

“not exactly.” you guiltily admitted as you heard two gasps behind you. one was almost dramatically loud while the other was a bit more subtle.

“y/n!” you heard from the two boys behind you, and korra gave you a knowing smile, your idiot brothers had figured it out.

[seventfics]

Autumn Birds

Written for @witcher-rarepair-summer-bingo

Prompt: We fell in love, but your previous lover reappeared/returned Relationships: Eskel/Jaskier (w/ past!Geralt/Eskel and past!Geralt/Jaskier) Rating: T Content Warnings: None Summary: They’d met just as the leaves were turning yellow. 

Read on AO3

* * *

They’d met just as the leaves were turning yellow.

Jaskier had heard of a witcher staying in town and, as was his prerogative since his acquaintance with a certain White Wolf, he’d ventured to see what the man was all about. It was not so often one got to meet someone of their caste. Why not have a little courage to break the ice himself?

The whispers spoke of a witcher with a terribly scarred face. Two swords strapped over his back, their pommels shaped into wolf heads. The women said he had a voice like a dog’s growl, so grave that when he spoke, it made children cry.

He thought that last bit was rather mean, and followed the trail of curses into a grimy tavern where a fight was about to break out.

“You promised fifty.”

“The best I can do is half.”

Jaskier’s hand freezes on the door. Whatever he’s come to doesn’t look good. The witcher’s back is to him, his padded shoulders raised with tension. The village’s alderman paces in front of him, fuming over a contract’s fee. There’s a few antsy people in the crowd too. The anger written on their faces makes him nervous.

He’s seen how this ends a dozen times. It’s gotten his own arse kicked butting into the middle of a witcher’s bargaining, actually.

“Now, now, gentlemen,” Jaskier interjects boisterously from the doorframe anyway. “This is no mood for drink and cheer. Calm your spirits with a little of the former—”

The alderman grumbles under his breath about merry idiots meddling in what they shouldn’t. “Shut up, bard. This here’s serious business. And I’m not about to be robbed by a witcher’s ridiculous high prize.”

“It’s not ridiculous. The contract says fifty, and,” the witcher stops to lift the bloody stump of a water hag’s head, “it’s already done.”

“That contract was up weeks ago. The reward’s gone down. You’re lucky half’s on the table at all.”

The witcher grunts—a familiar sound to Jaskier’s ears which translates to wordless annoyance—and drops the head on the floor. “You’re lucky the hag didn’t move closer into the village in that time.”

“Is that a threat?”

At the rising outrage in his tone, Jaskier slips closer to stare at the alderman over the witcher’s swordless shoulder. “Ah, I believe the witcher means more of your people would have died, had he not taken care of the problem so promptly. The reward hardly sounds like an unreasonable amount. I could get twice as much on a profitable eve of singing. In fact,” he flips to the witcher, who does not yet deign to look back at his unforeseen defender, “I could turn this place around and earn us both a decent share in one night. I’m no fop on the job!”

It’s then that the witcher looks towards him, but the bard only manages a quick glimpse of an incredulous set of eyebrows before the alderman starts shouting.

“Get out! Both of you! Out of my town or I’ll have the dogs chase you out!”

They both take that as their leave, Jaskier with a bit more speed in his jog.

At the outskirts the witcher turns fully, and at the sight of his whole face Jaskier almost gasps out loud. A long scar runs through his cheek, from eyebrow to jaw, and over his lips. It puckers the skin all around it, disfiguring half of his face.

Whatever caused that scar must have hurt a lot.

The witcher shifts in place, quiet for a long second as Jaskier does his best to hide his nerves. “I’m sorry to have involved you.”

“Oh, please, don’t be. I involved myself. Jaskier’s the name, by the way,” he introduces himself, hand extended in greeting.

The witcher scratches the back of his head. His lips twist to one side, bashful. One of his teeth peeks through the scarred tissue over his mouth. “Uh. Eskel.” He takes the offered hand and shakes it.

It’s the firmest handshake Jaskier has ever received.

“Well, Eskel. Are you short on coin? Because so am I.”

The snort he gets is—soft. Not at all like the gruff from before, with the alderman.

“I’m not doing too bad, I’d say. Just currently fifty short of what I expected to have at the end of the day.”

"How about I help with that? I wasn't lying when I said I could earn both a decent share, given the right crowd."

It's the sunset hour, and the leaves were falling on top of them. Everything is gold. The sky, the trees. Eskel’s eyes when they blink at him and he breaks into a genuine laugh.

Jaskier knows he’s a romantic. His heart flutters every odd day over strangers with pretty smiles. He’s just never seen such a shy, sweet smile on someone with such an intimidating facade.

Making him smile again became a personal quest.

* * *

At the next town over, Eskel speaks to the alderman there. This one is more reasonable at least, and up front about the sort of beast that lurks in the northern farms. Which brings up a whole new conversation as Jaskier doesn’t part from Eskel’s side despite the obvious danger.

Eskel grunts and sits him down, not unlike the times Geralt tried—and failed—to convince him to stay put. Jaskier just blinks his pretty blue eyes and says, “and how will I write a song of your prowess in battle if I am not there to witness it?”

“This is a dangerous contract, bard. It would be best if you let me handle it alone.”

“Oh no. No, no, I’ve heard that before a dozen times.”

Eskel pauses at that. “What?”

“I am perfectly capable of staying out of your way.”

The wyvern they encounter says otherwise.

To be fair, he had done a good job of staying out of the witcher’s way for most of the fight. It is only when the beast slams its tail into Eskel’s side on a backswing that Jaskier shouts in worry from his hiding place and brings undue attention to himself.

Wind whips around him for a split second, scattering dust into his eyes. It takes a moment to wipe them clean so of course he doesn’t see the great shadow flying at him. Doesn't realize the immediate need to hide or flee for his life until a giant claw snatches him by the bunched fabric on his back.

Jaskier's stomach plummets as he soars up. The ground recedes. His clothes start to rip. This is it, he panic-screams in his mind, this is his final day. Either as monster food or a blood splatter on a rock, his time has come.

A severe overreaction, and his own mistake for not trusting in a witcher's skill. He doesn't realize it in all, what with all his flailing about, but Eskel fires a crossbow bolt perfectly at the wyvern’s eye.

The beast screeches terribly loud in his ears. It flaps its wings once, twice, before twisting midair and letting him go.

They both fall, but Eskel catches him.

By the silence that follows after an earth-shaking crunch, he knows the witcher's won. Victory is not immediately on his mind, though. The way his sight spins and the sun paints a halo behind Eskel's hair, Jaskier dumbly thinks, oh—I've quite literally fallen in love.

“See?” he says instead, breathless with terror at almost having died, “I’m perfectly fine.”

Eskel raises a thick brow at him. And he's smiling too, the bard thinks. Could just be the scar making it look like a lopsided smile, but he wants to believe that he's made the witcher smile again with his foolish sense of humor.

“Are you alright? The tail,” Jaskier frets once his vision settles. Some of these monsters have poisoned stingers on the end of their tails. Are wyverns one of them?

But Eskel waves him down before he can consider the worst. “Relax. I cast Quen in time.”

“That’s a, uh, magic shield, right?”

Surprise colors Eskel's features. So it seems he's right. A point of pride on Jaskier's belt for remembering witcher signs.

Getting proof of a contract well done takes the witcher a good minute to collect. Wyvern skin is tough. The head would normally satisfy as proof, but it's too heavy to be lugging around town. He will have to make do with the wing tips. Should they question him, the remains aren't going anywhere.

“Come on, bard. Time to get our day's work done. And after that, we're going west.”

“'We'?” Something about the proclamation has his heart beating fast.

“'Course. I'm not letting you out of my sight now.”

He makes a show of bowing dramatically. “I wouldn’t want to be elsewhere.”

* * *

“You’re a friend of Geralt’s.”

Jaskier looks up from his notes.

Traveling with someone is always interesting—with a witcher even more so. So far he's learned that Eskel has far more routines than Geralt ever did, like counting his coin at the end of every week, and making sure he has two of every potion ready.

Jaskier quirks a half-smile. “I am. How did you figure? I never said his name.”

“Your song.” He points to the scribbled mess on his lap. “Or, I guess your work in progress. I see an expression he uses a lot, that he learned from me.”

“Oh?”

Eskel sits by him and nods, as if finally understanding Jaskier’s odd ease partnering with a witcher, and starts the story of where the expression in his handwriting originated from.

It’s funny at first, imagining a much younger, somehow more foolish Geralt together with this huge, frightening man who is not frightening at all to talk to. Eskel speaks so softly, so tenderhearted about the old memory—two boys, witchers-to-be, practically joined at the hip, making crude jokes. So he reciprocates with a tale of where he comes from, as destiny deigned to put them in each other’s paths.

As it happens, a lot of their first stories aren’t even their own, but Geralt’s.

And Eskel has many more over his. He’s more than happy to share them over camp.

Some of it leaves Jaskier’s throat aching. This is someone who clearly cares about his big grumpy friend. It's someone he can understand.

Then Eskel claps a bare hand on his back, his thumb and forefinger a hot press just under his nape, and oh, he’s more than a little foolishly in love actually, as his head is emptied of all reason at the small touch.

“Am I to become your travel bard,” Jaskier quips with an airy giggle. “I’m excellent entertainment at parties.”

“Not for long. It’s almost winter. Soon I’ll have to head north to meet my brothers.”

His heart sinks. “Oh.”

Eskel squeezes his shoulder with careful strength. “You better keep out of trouble while I’m gone, you hear?”

“Of course. I don’t go looking for trouble.”

“No, trouble just finds you.”

Well, if ‘trouble’ is a scarred, smirking witcher, he sure hopes that to be true.

* * *

They meet again when the trees are just beginning to color with spring blooms.

There is also a griffin tearing through the town's cattle, but that’s besides the point. Easily dealt with. Which is good, seeing as Jaskier had been near the scene and probably next on the menu. No one had told him about the griffin, so really. He's just as surprised to find Eskel as he is about the beast.

“You alright, bard?”

“I am now.”

Matter resolved, Jaskier walks in step next to Eskel. The town opens before them, welcoming the witcher not with smiles, but grudging gratitude.

“You sure? Trouble didn’t come knocking while I was gone?”

“Only a man with a lover’s grudge come to kick my ass out of a wonderfully luxurious establishment. Didn’t even get to enjoy the hot bath I paid for, which is such a terrible waste of hot water.”

A deep hum comes out of the witcher. “A lover’s grudge?”

“Just a past dalliance that won’t forget me.”

Eskel stops and shifts on his feet, like he wants to say something but he doesn’t know how to start.

Oh, witchers and their awkward conversation skills.

“You know what, I’m starving. I think a good, hearty meal is owed between us. What do you say we go collect your reward and we break fast at the alderman’s recommendation?”

“We don’t have to get the coin right now. I could go for some food.”

“First tavern we see then. Come on.”

Right as he says it, he wraps his arm around Eskel’s, and maybe he’s just being too obvious, too hopeful, but Eskel doesn’t shrug him off. They make their way to a large and welcoming tavern, him talking his head off about the barn smell that permeates the whole town and ignoring the dark looks people give them down the street, as Eskel listens, not a word coming from his mouth. It worries Jaskier a minute that he’s becoming more annoyance than the teasing meddler he wants to be. But Eskel is just scratching his chin, looking down and letting Jaskier lead.

When it becomes clear that Eskel doesn’t have any rented lodgings yet, Jaskier offers his own. “I’m sure the innkeeper won’t mind us bunking if we pay for two, at the end of our stay.”

Eskel doesn't say no. He also doesn't say yes. It takes them finally being settled in a table of their own, full of fruits, cheese and bread, neither of them taking the first bite to eat, for Jaskier to nervously ask, “What is it?”

“Nothing,” comes the too-quick response.

“If I overstepped in some way, please tell me.”

“It’s nothing like that, I—uh.” Eskel shakes his head, his expression scrunched up unpleasantly.

“Whatever it is, I won’t be offended.”

He's already writing a million apologies in his head for any of his imagined offenses, that he's not quite prepared for what Eskel says instead.

“You are...different from what I expected.”

Jaskier blinks. “How so?”

“I don’t know. You’re just. Human. You’re normal.” He makes a point of gesturing at the table, the people keeping their distance. “I don’t get why you do all this for me.”

It's slow-creeping, but once the pieces align, Jaskier starts to understand what he means. That confusion, he’s known it with Geralt. Why do you stick with me? What does a witcher have to offer a human that isn’t the service of a silver sword? What does a human want with a mutant when there are plenty of other ordinary, uncomplicated folk in the world to have for company?

“Because you’re a good man,” he tells the witcher gently. “Because you saved my life and I want to repay you in kind. Most reasonably of all, because we’re friends, and friends take care of each other.”

Of course there’s more to it than that, but if a friend is all Eskel wants, then a friend he shall be.

The rumble of the tavern fills the air as Eskel stares at him a little wide-eyed. Jaskier gives him a slight smile. As a close, he pushes the platter of cheese forward with an encouraging, “now eat your fill, my friend.”

Once Eskel returns his smile, he thinks that, well, that everything will turn out alright.

And they’re happy eating their food when Geralt shows up for the griffin that’s already dead.

At his distinct silhouette, Eskel stands up. “White Wolf.”

“Eskel,” Geralt calls back gravely.

They clasp arms and pat each other’s shoulders in sync. It might not seem like much to outsiders, but what a rare sight to behold—two witchers, two mirrored grins on both their faces.

Eskel is the first to part from the hug with a chiding, “You didn’t come for winter.”

“I know. I had a lot going on. Saw your handiwork hooked to your horse’s saddle.” Then he looks down, and spots Eskel's table company. “Jaskier?”

“Geralt.”

Their held eye-contact feels longer than it is. Looking away, Jaskier half expects the whole tavern to be staring at them, but as it turns out, no one cares to pay the witchers and their odd bard any attention now that the monster's been dealt with. It's just him, imagining his heart hanging out of his sleeve for everyone to judge.

And maybe Eskel senses something's up between them, because he leaves them with the excuse to collect his coin.

“I haven’t seen you in a while,” Jaskier says after Geralt takes Eskel's abandoned seat. “Have you really been so busy that you couldn’t let your friends know you were alive?”

Geralt's silence is its own answer—a little shame, a little remorse. He remembers how Eskel had said that as time went on, Geralt just, lost touch. There had been something heavy in Eskel’s eyes when he said it, and Jaskier had felt it in his soul. Now he understands why. Him and Eskel, they'd both gone through the same impossible task of loving someone who doesn’t believe he can be loved.

By gods, he still loves Geralt, but Geralt's heart is a rusty cage, and neither of them can coax the old bird that lives in it anymore. Soft words and gentle promises have run their course.

“So,” the witcher starts, “you and Eskel? Didn't know you knew each other.”

“Maybe if you’d met either of us during winter you would have heard.” The phrasing's rough, but there's no resentment in his voice. He would have liked to know that Geralt had been safe in his wintering home, with Eskel.

“Yeah. I’m...surprised.” Jaskier raises his brow at him. Which just earns a quick shake of Geralt’s head. “He doesn’t make friends easily.”

“Neither do you, and yet look at us.”

“Look at us,” he echoes, staring at the empty plates.

“We missed a lot of opportunities together, didn’t we?” It doesn't make the truth any easier to swallow, but acknowledging the what-could-have-beens has always made him feel better afterward. Like closing a book, and getting ready to open a new one. He hopes Geralt knows that there's no bridges destroyed between them. Only those missed moments.

He still very much cares for Geralt, and he knows that Geralt does as well. They just have to come to terms with what's over—and what might come next.

“I won’t lie to you,” Jaskier adds more seriously. “I don’t want to miss any opportunities with him.”

The 'him' in question is unmistakable. Geralt nods. He looks down, one end of his mouth drawing up to dimple his cheek.

He says, like an olive branch offering, “His favorite flower is yarrow. Not because they’re pretty, but because they’re useful in the most surprising ways.”

* * * 

They spend the day catching up, all three of them, before Geralt is on the road again, taking his own path. Jaskier sees how it brightens Eskel’s spirits to have seen him off, and cheers up twofold. 

“I’ve known him practically my whole life,” Eskel tells him.

“I’ve known him half of mine.”

“So you understand.”

“That he’s a prat? Oh yes. Good at heart, backwards about verbalizing it. Cheeky when he wants to be. Oh by the way, here.”

From out of his little travel bag, Jaskier pulls a swathe of yarrows.

“Saw some at market street,” he explains, presenting them. “Thought you might find use in them for your potions.”

Eskel turns to him, his bright witcher eyes bouncing between him and the yarrows. Jaskier feels his heart climb up his throat, wondering what runs through Eskel's mind that makes him pause for so long.

Then Eskel takes them with one hand and with the other, he touches Jaskier’s face. It's big, warm, calloused against his skin. And sudden.

“‘Cheeky when he wants to be’, right?”

Jaskier stutters to say, “Well, yes, I mean, but this isn’t about him—”

He forgets how to speak after Eskel kisses him. It’s the lightest peck on the corner of his lips, so light that once he draws back, he wonders if he's not still dreaming back in their rented room.

“Thank you. I know just what to use them for.”

The yarrow gets tucked away with the other herbs in Eskel's saddlebag. A few glasses clink together as he moves things around so they don’t get crushed. And then, as Jaskier stands there, stupefied and slack-jawed, Eskel mounts his steed, a soot-black beauty that neighs softly at Jaskier’s face.

“Where are you headed for now?”

“Nowhere. Anywhere.” Wherever you’ll go, he thinks to himself. Wherever you'll have me.

Eskel grins wide at him, and it's the most beautiful sight, his smile, with all his teeth gleaming.

“That sounds like trouble.”

[paintingcrimsons]

Slow Down

Pairing: Ellie Williams x reader

A/N: so um this was the most random idea I’ve had in my entire life but honestly I was thinking that someone has got to stumble upon something like this since they existed before the outbreak right?

There are no spoilers for part 2 as I’ve set this for before that all happens!

Warnings: NSFW, hardcore smut, fingering, oral, use of sex toys (trust me it makes sense once you read it), pretty much porn without plot, violence, blood mention, in charge Ellie, swearing.

One last warning, this is literally pure filth, so, good luck.

Ellie had always thought she was going to end up dying, alone, with no one by her side. But now looking at you, she knew that wasn’t the case anymore.

She really admired you. The way you smiled even in the toughest times, or your thoughtfulness to others even though they showed their dislike for you. This was it, for Ellie, she was completely enamoured with you. 

Even though she knew you could take care of yourself, she was always worried. Worried that you might get bit by an infected, or severely hurt by another group that were taking no prisoners along the way through your patrols. Ellie’s heart would always stop when you ran out into the line of fire, it was almost as if time would stop when you would do that. 

This is why currently during the patrols that you had with one another, she was always ready, overprotective and twitching, ready to fight at any moment. You, however, were relaxed, a spring in your step as you walked down the rocky pathway leading into the street. You looked back, watching as your girlfriend adjusted the backpack strap on her shoulder. Her eyes caught yours with a glint of something you couldn’t recognise. 

You gave her a small smile as you turned back around, carrying on as you entered the street. Your eyes trailed over the plants now starting to overtake the buildings that were once filled with bustling people wanting to buy things to decorate their homes, new clothes or...

What the fuck is that? Looking over, you notice a shop that looks completely out of place for what the other buildings were for. You squinted, looking at the name of the shop, jogging over to see what it was. 

“Dark Desire...” You mumbled, frowning at the odd name of the shop. Looking back, you see Ellie trying to catch up with you, in which you grin at her before shoving open the door to the store. 

The door opened with a loud bang, causing a runner to yell at the sound, your head snapped to the sound but before you could grab your gun out of its holster, the runner was on top of you, arms flailing at you as you held it by its chest in attempt to shove it off of you. 

Suddenly, two loud bangs went off, blood spurting across your face as the runner’s face had exploded from the impact of the bullet, for it to then go limp in your arms. Shoving it off of you, you stood, your hands on your knees to try and catch your breath. “Holy shit.” You breathed out, your voice weak and breathless. 

“What the fuck were you thinking?” Ellie’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts, causing you to look up at her, noticing her concerned but angry expression. 

“I know it was reckless and stupid and I should’ve been more careful-.” You started, before a sigh came from Ellie, stopping you from finishing your sentence. 

“Look it’s fine, just...” Her voice trailed off as she looked down, kicking her feet against the floor in embarrassment. “Just be more careful okay? We’re not in Jackson so nothing is safe at the moment.”

Nodding, you two exchanged a look without anymore words before you looked away, wondering where the hell you were. Your eyes trailed from the provocative but ripped pictures to the lingerie that was still in the store. Your eyes widened as you felt your face get bright red, knowing exactly what the store was now. Rubbing the back of your neck you decided to act as though you were looking for supplies rather than looking at what the store was about. 

“Y/N,” Ellie spoke as she looked around, a slight smirk on her face. “Are you trying to tell me something?” 

Your head snapped up. “No, no! That’s not it!” Feeling your whole face go red in embarrassment as you waved your arms about as if that would distract her from what was inside the store. “I just didn’t know what it was and I wanted to check it out!” 

Ellie’s smile grew as she didn’t reply, turning and walking deeper into the store. You decided not to follow her, worried that you would embarrass yourself even more which would cause her to tease you when you got back to Jackson. Groaning, you rubbed your hands across your face when thinking about what Jesse or Dina would say if Ellie told them what you two had found during your patrol. 

You sighed, not even wanting to go and find your girlfriend in fear of being teased more or finding something even more embarrassing than the sexy lingerie barely hanging on their hooks. So you then decided to go and wait by the door to keep a lookout for anything suspicious. 

Leaning against the wall by the door, you waited until Ellie came back out, a small glint of something you couldn’t read was in her eyes as she looked at you, once again adjusting the backpack on her shoulder. 

“Find anything?” You asked hesitantly, trying to figure out what she was feeling. She shrugged, gesturing with her head to follow her back down the street once again. 

“Nothing important.”

                                                    -----------------

You both arrived back to Jackson unscathed. It was a quick and short route, considering it was quite close to the place itself, so you two were back just as the sun was beginning to set. Your mind had completely forgotten the incident at the store and you both were just entering the small house you lived in together. 

It wasn’t much but it was cosy enough for the both of you to live in, it was close to where your parents lived and wasn’t too far from where Joel lived so Ellie could go and visit when she wanted to. You frowned at the thought of Joel, knowing for a while that Ellie was quite hostile with him. You had assumed that they had a fight but didn't even consider that it would cause their relationship to be strained for years. 

Shaking your head, you tried to not think into it too much as you dropped your bag by the door of the bedroom, your feet slowly dragging your body towards the bed before lying back onto it. Putting your arm over your eyes, you listened as Ellie came into the room and the bed dipped. “Babe.” Ellie spoke softly, to which you grunted a response. 

Feeling her shift her body so that she was basically straddling you, you removed your arm from head to look at what she was doing. Your eyes trailed to hers as her arms held herself up beside your head. 

She grinned as she leaned over, her lips attaching to your neck, nibbling and sucking at different spots, knowing that they were going to leave marks after she was done. “What’s gotten into you?” You giggled as one hand moved towards her hair and the other went to her waist. 

Ellie didn’t reply as she continued to attack your neck with kisses before pulling away, her eyes showing a look of love when she looked at you in which she then leaned down to kiss your lips. You tasted sweet almost like sugar as your tongues mingled together, your hands going towards her hair while one of her hands went to caress your cheek. 

You kept kissing, only breaking it when you both started undressing each other, the clothes soon going everywhere, seeing as your shirt landed on top of one of the lamps across the bedroom. Giggling, your hands wandered towards her nipples, your hands pinching and twisting, causing you to elicit a small moan as Ellie leaned back. Her hands then moved over yours before taking your hands and pinning them above your head, pinching them together with one hand while the other trailed down your body. 

Her hand trailed down to your thighs which were currently clamped together, before using it to pry your thighs apart, which you easily let her do so. You gasped as you felt her fingers against you, your whole body jolting as you felt one of her fingers run up your slit. “Ellie...” You groaned as her thumb gently rubbed circles on your clit. 

“That’s it babe,” Ellie muttered, her breath hot against your neck as she gently inserted a finger inside of you. “Just like that.” 

Your breath was shaky and you gasped at the feeling as Ellie began curling her finger inside slowly, watching your reactions as your back arched slightly from the sensation of her finger inside of you. She then slowly inserted another finger, her other hand soon letting go of your hands in which you wrapped them around her back, your nails digging into her as the sensation of something inside of you overwhelmed you. 

Ellie grunted as she continued to move her fingers, curling them and moving them slightly while her thumb attacked your clit. You watched as she moved her body, her lips trailing down your stomach and towards your core, her tongue replacing her thumb as she licked and nibbled on your clit. 

Your hands moved towards her hair, gripping it tight as the sensation of her was overwhelming, your high almost peaking as your moans began to become louder, the breathy sounds of Ellie’s name coming out of your lips as the fingers inside of you began to quicken the pace.

But just before you could reach your peak, she pulled away, licking her lips as she pulled her fingers out of you and then proceeded to lick her fingers, tasting you on her tongue once more. You watched as your breaths tried to catch up with you, frowning as she suddenly stopped. 

“Why did you stop?” You asked, running one of your hands through your hair as Ellie leaned over towards her bag that was right next to the bed. 

“I wanted to try something different,” she paused as she grabbed something out of her bag before leaning back up and showing you what it was. “Are you up for it?” 

Your eyes moved from hers towards what she was holding...

A strap-on?! You thought as you slowly nodded, your words failing you, watching as her grin widened and she began to put it on before coming over towards you, her body leaning over you once more before stopping and looking at you. 

“Are you sure you want this?” She asked, one of her hands moving towards your chin, making you look up at her once more. You nodded again to which she gave you a discerning look. “Use your words, Y/N.”

“Yes, I want this, with you.” You finally spoke, your voice wavering from being slightly nervous with trying something completely different out for the first time. She nodded, happy with your answer before adjusting herself over you fully, holding the strap-on and moving it towards your entrance. She slowly pushed in, earning an uncomfortable grunt from you as you took on its size. 

Once it was fully inside, Ellie paused, waiting for you to adjust just like she did when she had her fingers inside of you. Your arms wrapped around her once more, one hand back in her hair gripping it as you buried your head in her shoulder as you waited for the pain to subside while she stroked your head in the small amount of comfort she could give you. 

After a few moments you finally nodded to let her know to try and move and experiment with what she had on her. Getting into some sort of good rhythm took her a few tries as Ellie tried to figure out how to get it right, but after a few tries she was able to thrust into you with ease, with you moving your lips towards her to bite and nibble on her neck just like she did to yours. 

“Fuck, Ellie.” You gasped, pulling back from her neck as she hit a spot inside of you that caused intense pleasure. Your hand travelled down to between her thighs, pushing two fingers in and curling them inside of her, moving it alongside of her thrusting inside of you. 

She gasped at the unexpected feeling as she continued to go faster, the moans leaving your mouth were becoming louder and both of your climaxes were approaching. Ellie leaned down, catching her lips with yours and muffling both of your moans, hiding them from the rest of the world so that they couldn’t hear. 

You pulled back as your thumb circled her clit, trying to reach both of your highs at the same time. “Baby, I’m going to-” You were cut off by your own moans as Ellie nodded in agreement. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” She groaned as with one last thrust, both of you reached your peak, groans and swears falling out of both of your mouths as you tried to help each other come down from your highs. 

Ellie collapsed on top of you as her body trembled. You tried catching your breath as you removed your fingers from her and as she removed herself from you. You breathed heavily as she took the strap-on off of her body before coming back over to you. You rested your head on her chest as she wrapped her arms around you.

It was silent for a few minutes, both of you still rolling in your ecstasies. After a few more moments, you moved to look over at her, an eyebrow raised. “Where did you get that?” You questioned.

“That store you stumbled upon and then refused to go further inside of,” She replied, shrugging her shoulders at you as a small laugh left her lips. “Guess it was a good idea to go look inside after all.”

A gasp left you lips as you slapped her arm lightly, “So that’s why you were acting so weird earlier!” This earned a loud laugh from Ellie as she tightened her hold against you.

“Hey don’t blame me, you seemed to like it.”

[erin-bo-berin]

Drunken Words

MASTERLIST

Seems like its been forever since I’ve posted a fluff! This wasn’t really a request, but after a convo with an anon who popped up in my ask, this little fic came to be. It’s a little shorter than most of my fics, but I think it suits the purpose. It’s short, sweet and to the point. Hope you all enjoy! Happy reading!

Spencer Reid/Reader

Rating: G (fluff)

Word Count: 1,524

Cheers and laughter filled the night air, music accompanying the happy sounds.

You took another drink of your champagne, the carbonated bubbles tickling your nose. You were already on your third glass of it, but it was a celebration, so no big deal.

One of your best friends Jennifer Jareau had finally married the love of her life, Will LaMontagne Jr. You couldn’t be more happy for them. They’d been together for over five years, been parents to their amazing little boy named Henry for four years and now they were tying the knot. They were a great couple.

You took a large swallow of your alcohol, your head buzzing since the middle of your second glass.

“What are you waiting for, girly?” Penelope Garcia twirled by you, in the arms of Derek Morgan, “Come dance already!”

You laughed, shaking your head, grabbing another glass of champagne after you finished your previous one. 

“Don’t you think you’ve had enough?” a slightly slurring Spencer Reid, meandered up to you.

You giggled, your head now swimming more than before. Apparently, you were drunker than you thought.

“And how much have you had, mishter?” you slurred, yourself.

“Two glasses,” he grinned, proudly.

“I saw you stumble over your own feet just ten minutes ago.”

He waved a hand, loosely.

“No big deal. Come on, wanna dance?”

“With you as drunk as you are? Psh no way.”

“Too bad,” he giggled, pulling you out to the dance floor, causing you to deposit your glass on the nearest passing surface.

“I wasn’t done with that,” you pouted.

“You can get another one later, Y/N,” he said, moving to the fast paced song.

Your hips swayed to the song as he twirled you quite literally around the dance floor. It did nothing for your already spinning head, but you were laughing and smiling so hard, that you didn’t want to stop.

“You’re cute when you smile,” he chuckled.

His hand was on your back and you were pulling him by his hands to dance to the next song.

“You’re cute in a tux.”

“Maybe I should wear them to work more often,” he joked.

“I wouldn’t mind.”

The alcohol was making your tongue loose and your inhibitions around your friend and coworker disappear.

“You’re cute,” he grinned.

“You’re cuter,” you chuckled, booping his nose and giggling.

The DJ decided to take a break and of course, that was when you and Spencer decided to fetch you both more alcohol.

“Yo, PG! Can I get a shot for myself and my lady here?” Spencer hollered.

You had to stifle your laugh with your hand at Garcia’s startled look.

“How much has he had to drink?” you heard Morgan mumble, “I’ve never seen him like this.”

“Neither have I,” Garcia mumbled back.

She poured two shots and handed them to Spencer. He handed one to you and clinked his shot glass against yours.

Throwing it back with a wince, you moved to sit down in one of the chairs but squealed when you felt arms around your waist. Spencer pulled you into his lap with a big grin.

You didn’t miss the wide eyes of some of your other coworkers.

“What?” you asked, clearly confused.

“Nothing, nothing.” Morgan said.

“Have fun little love birds,” Garcia called over her shoulder.

Your brain was too hazy from the drinks to register what she’d said, so you turned back to Spencer.

“You smell good,” he grinned, nuzzling his face into your neck.

“It’s Sí by Giorgio Armani. I only wear it for you.”

“Do you now?” he grinned, flirtatiously.

“UNCA SPENCA!”

You both turned to see Henry running over.

“Pway wiff me?” he asked.

You stood from his lap and he got up, scooping Henry in his arms.

“Little man is going on a flight!”

“Spencer Reid, don’t you dare drop my son!” JJ hollered across the lawn.

You giggled, grabbing a fresh glass of champagne, watching as Spencer put Henry down and Henry started chasing Spencer in circles.

“What is with you guys tonight?” Emily asked, walking over, studying you.

“What do you mean?”

“You two just seem...different.”

You shrugged, not knowing what to say.

“Everything is as normal as always.”

The DJ started the music up again and you grinned.

“Time to hit the dance floor again!”

You danced all the way back towards the floor, your champagne flute still in hand.

•

Spencer found you next to the gift table, where you were standing, taking a breather.

“Guess what?” he asked.

“Hmm?”

“I got you these gifts. I hope you like them.” 

He tried to motion to them, but fell against the table, pushing some of the gifts off the table.

“Spencer!”

You gasped, then burst into giggles, trying to straighten them before anyone noticed.

The music changed from the more fast paced and upbeat songs that had been playing, to a slower song.

“Dance with me,” Spencer said, suddenly serious.

You obliged him.

He took your hand, leading you out to the dance floor where he slowly danced with you in his arms.

His arms were around your waist and yours were on his chest as he spun you gently, landing you right back against his chest, breathless.

Maybe it was more than the alcohol, but in your fuzzy brain, it seemed to make sense to kiss him. 

So, you did.

You leaned your face upwards to his, meeting his lips as you kissed him.

The world spun and disappeared around you as all you could focus on was him kissing you back.

You never saw the shocked and wide eyed looks from the rest of the team as they stared at the two of you.

You didn’t miss the statement from David Rossi though.

“Maybe we need to get them drunk more often so they’ll finally admit they like each other.”

•

By the time the sun made its appearance again the next morning, you were waking up groggy and incredibly hungover.

Rossi didn’t let anyone leave last night due to the fact that everyone had been drinking. So his house—or mansion, as he preferred to call it—had become a crash pad for everyone until they were sober enough to drive home.

Rossi’s instructions were the only thing you remembered from the previous night. The only thing you remembered prior to that was the ceremony. You must’ve drank a lot.

You were sitting up from the couch, rubbing your head when you saw Spencer walking in from the kitchen.

“Morning,” he whispered, looking as hungover as you.

You groaned in response. 

“Here, I figured you’d want some relief as well,” Spencer said, handing over a bottle of water and an ibuprofen.

“Bless you.”

You took it, sipping the water gently. 

Luckily, you weren’t one to vomit much during a hangover, but you knew if you gulped the water like you’d been in the Sahara desert for months, you definitely would be sick.

“How much did I drink last night? What did I drink last night?” 

You rubbed your temples, trying to soothe the throbbing in your head with no luck.

“I don’t even remember what I drank,” Spencer chuckled, sitting next to you.

“Well good morning love birds!” came a loud holler.

You groaned, covering your ears at the loud volume.

“Morgan, I swear if you don’t shut up,” you grumbled.

“Aw, did someone wake up on the wrong side of a lonely couch this morning?” he teased, “I was sure you’d end up sleeping with your boyfriend.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” 

You winced, your words a bit too loud to your own ears.

“You and pretty boy over here were all over each other last night,” Morgan said, coming into the room, a bagel in hand.

Your eyes widened, your face burning.

“Stop joking around. What really happened?”

“He’s not lying,” Garcia said, walking in with JJ in tow, “You were arguing at one point with one another about who was the cutest.”

“Plus you were in his lap half the night,” JJ added.

You groaned, burying your face into the back of the couch.

“Well I figured you two decided to finally admit that you liked each other,” Morgan announced, beaming.

You took a peek at Spencer, who until this point had remained silent.

His lips were pressed together and pulled inward, like he was trying to suppress a smile. His glance darted to you and the dam broke, freeing the smile. You felt a flutter in your chest at it.

“Hey you finally kissed, so at least you finally have proof that you like each other,” Garcia pointed out.

You groaned again; you couldn’t feel any more embarrassed if you tried. 

You felt a touch against your arm. You looked up to see Spencer, watching you. His hand glided down your arm, to your hand, which he took in his with a small smile.

Maybe the alcohol hadn't been such a bad idea.

Derek’s exiting comment had you both trying to hold back your laughter.

“If we knew all it took was to get you guys drunk, we would’ve done it sooner!”

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[brelione]

Just Me? (Kelce,Rafe,TopperXReader)

Warnings:Not proof read,mentions of eating disorders,not proof read,hehehehehe yall arent ready <3

The Best Boys   Marvel Movies   Action Figures     Bird

You couldnt stop thinking about what had happened with Rafe.You had tried everything to get it off your mind.You tried going for a swim,wrapping your banadage over with plastic wrap like Kelce had told you but that just made you think of how much more fun it would be to play volleyball in the pool with the boys.

You tried watching tv,doing the dishes and baking but you had baked brownies.Who’s favorite food in the whole world is brownies?Rafe.Rafe fucking loves brownies.You couldnt even understand why Rafe would kiss you.He had literally seen you with tears in your eyes and vomit all over your face.That’s gross.You sat in your kitchen for a while,walking in circles on top of the kitchen table,debating on whether or not to call Kelce.

You couldnt talk to Rafe about it,that was just both awkward and ridiculous.Kelce would probably insist on inviting Rafe over to have a group discussion about the importance of communication and understanding.That left Topper.You huffed,deciding to get off your table and grab a diet coke from the fridge before calling him.

“Did your cut reopen?”He asked anxiously,not even bothering to say hello.He held the football that was previously being thrown back and forth to his chest,holding up a finger to Kelce as he listened to you. “An emotional one.Can you come over?”You asked,tapping your fingers against your marble countertop.

He frowned,looking at the dull sky through his dark sunglasses,letting out a small sigh. “Yeah,sure.So whats going on?Is it the type of emotional reopen that you need McDonalds and coffee or is it a tissue and Criminal Minds situation?”He asked,guessing it was probably the second one.

 “Neither.Are you alone?”You asked,intriguing him. “You want me to come over?Like just me?”He asked. “Are-are you with the others?”You asked,waiting anxiously for his answer.He stared back at a confused Kelce,humming. “Im with Kelce.Would you be okay if I brought him?”He asked you quietly.

 “No-do not bring Kelce.I dont know,just tell him that you have to clean your fishtank or that your uncle died or something.”You exclaimed quickly,not wanting to hurt Kelce’s feelings.Topper’s jaw dropped. “Dont fucking manifest my uncle dyint-just give me twenty minutes,alright?”He asked.You smacked yourself in the face with your palm,groaning. “Yeah,okay.”You answered,hanging up.

You spent those twenty minutes pacing around your house,jogging up and down your stairs until you were painting,tug at your shirt to cool yourself off.You got annoyed with the material,ripping it off your head and throwing it. 

“FUCK!”You shouted for no reason in particular.Everything was beginning to stress you out,walking down the stairs and fighting the urge to scream as the moment ran through your head once more.You always knew Rafe would drive you crazy.Your door opened,Topper standing there with a frozen coffee topped with whipped cream.

He looked over to you,surprised that you werent laying on your couch as usual.He glanced down at your chest for a split second before staring down at the floor,feeling guilty.He held out the coffee to you,eyebrows furrowing when you placed it on the table opposed to eating the whipped cream off. “What’s going on?”He asked,reaching out to grab your shoulders and make you look at him.

 “Im sorry,im really fucking stressed and I have a stomach ache and im going insane and you’re the only person I cant think to talk too.Did you tell Kelce you were comeing here?”You asked.He grabbed your wrist gently,pulling you onto the couch and looking at you with concern evident on his face.

 “I told Kelce that I left my oven on so I had to leave.Rafe is out on the boat with Sarah,Ward,Rose and Wheezie for the day.Can you tell me what’s going on?”He asked,dragging the coffee across the table so it was in front of you.You sighed,bringing your knee to your chest and wrapping your arms around it.

 “I just-god,shitting fuck.”You cursed,getting quiet as you pinched the bridge of your nose.Topper was getting more and more worried as the seconds passed,reaching out a hand to rub your thigh in attempts to comfort you.

He let out a small gasp when you gripped his wrist tightly,shaking it back and forth with slight aggression. “Literally dont tell anyone what im about to tell you,got it?Not Rafe,not Kelce,not Nemo,not your mom,not your uncle not anyone.Do you understand?”You asked,trying your best not to sound completely insane but not succeeding at all.

He nodded quickly,anticipating building up within him. “Yeah,I totally wont.I promise.Now tell me what the fuck is happening!”He exclaimed. “Rafe kissed me.”You answered,feeling your hands shake a little as Topper went silent.He didnt know what to think.He was mroe mad at Rafe than anything.They had all agreed to just stay friends with you and not to fuck anything up.

He felt jealous that he wasn't the one to kiss you but also felt more worried about how you felt about the whole situation.Clearly you didn't feel great about it otherwise he wouldn't be sitting on your couch.He was shocked that you had chose to talk to him over Kelce.You had always picked Kelce to speak to about your emotional problems.That only made Topper think more.

Why wouldn't you want Kelce to know? “God,topper.Can you please say something?You’re stressing me the fuck out.”You huffed.He licked his lips upon realizing that his jaw had dropped. “So he just kissed you?Like,it just happened?”He asked.You nodded,looking over to the coffee and the foamy white mess that had once been a beautiful swirly mountain.

 “So...how do you feel about it?Do you like him like that?”Topper asked,trying to keep himself from freaking out.You bit your tongue,looking over to your tv and deciding that this whole house was too awkward and too quiet.You reached for the remote,putting on some cartoons. “I don't even know.I don't know what to think or how to feel and I havent talked to Rafe since then and now I feel like shit.What do I even do?i cant call him or anything cause I have nothing to say.”You thought out loud,kind of wishing that Kelce was here to go through all of the possibilities to help you figure out your best option.

But he wasn't. “Thats okay.You don't really need to know right this second but if you want to keep things from getting awkward then-well,hear me out.I think its a good idea for you to talk to Rafe about this or just talk to Rafe.Right now things are awkward because you’re not talking to him.Just think about it,you’re avoiding each other which makes you both too uncomfortable to start a conversation which will make things worse.”He explained as if he had been through this type of thing before.

You bit the inside of your cheek,forcing your eyes to look at the tv where a rerun of The Loud House was playing. “You really think its a good idea for me to talk to him?”You asked.You saw him nod from the corner of your eye,hearing your stomach rumble right after. “Yeah,I do.You should call him and ask him to hang out or something.I can invite Kelce over too so its not awkward and you two can either talk about it or not.Just being around him in that setting will probably make you less nervous.”He handed you the frozen coffee and a straw,wanting you to drink it.

 “How stressed have you been?”He asked,relieved when you took a sip of the coffee.You pulled away from the straw,sighing. “Why?Do I seem overly stressed?”You asked,trying to figure out how he could tell you were anxious.On top of being friends with you for over five years he also watched Criminal Minds.He probably knew shit about your anxiousness.

He shrugged,looking around to see where you had thrown your shirt. “Your house smells like brownies.You used to bake so you’d feel closer to food and you stress bake sometimes.When was the last time you ate?”He asked,making your eyes widen and your heart thump.Shit.You hadnt eaten since the last time you saw Rafe,three days ago. 

“Yeah,its been a while,hasn't it?”He asked,knowing that he had caught you. “Did you do this on purpose?”He asked,tracing figure eights on your kneecap. “No,i've just been really stressed.”You answered.He nodded,telling you to drink your coffee while he went to make you something.You sat on the couch,stirring the coffee and thinking again.The thought of him kissing you invaded your mind as you thought back to everything that had led up to it.

You had wrapped your legs around his waist but that wasnt something uncommon for you to do.You’d wrap your legs around him and your arms around his shoulders and make him carry you around like a toddler.Something told you it was just the way the situation was,he was really close to you and no one else was around so why the fuck not?That was probably all it was but your brain kept going back to the way your stomach felt and the way your heart sped up.

It was something that you hadnt felt before and your brain was probably just trying to recreate the feeling by forcing you to think about it for 72 hours straight.Yeah,that made perfect sense.Your phone dinged,causing your heart to drop into your ass.Fuck.You picked it up,not daring to look at the screen as you built up the courage to look at it.

Three….two...one.You looked at the screen,eyes widening when you saw who it was.It was your uncle,one that you hadnt spoken too since your fourteenth birthday.That was the first red flag before you even read the message. “Your mother’s with me.She’s not coming back.”Was all it said.He was in Italy which meant that your mother was too.She had no reason to be in Italy.This had to be some sort of sick joke.Maybe your Uncle’s wife had took his phone and texted that to you just to get you on edge.

Deep down you knew that it wasnt true,that you mother really wasnt coming back.Your eyes began to water,a few tears rolling down your cheeks.What the fuck were you gonna do?There was no knowing if she would pay the bills from Italy or if you would lose your house and everything you owned because of her.You let out a muffled sob,covering your mouth with your hand.Topper heard,running out of the kitchen.

 “Hey,whats wrong?Is it about Rafe?”He asked,kneeling in front of you and grabbing you a paper towel to blow your nose.You shook your head,watching as he picked up your phone and read the message across the screen. “Its gonna be okay,I promise,okay?”He began to rub your back,wishing the Rafe or Kelce was here since he wasnt the best at comforting you.Rafe was best at cuddling and Kelce was best at talking and Topper preferred to just be emotional support. “No-no she’s not coming back and im gonna lose the house and im fucked!”You sobbed,his arms wrapping tight around you. “No,no you’re not.We’ll figure it out.”He answered,making the decision to call Rafe and Kelce to come and help with the situation.

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[hannahdra-ws]

The Village

well, I’ve been there, sitting in that same chair / whispering that same prayer half a million times / it’s a lie, though, buried in disciples / one page of the bible isn’t worth a life 

(or: Patton decides to come out to his parents. It doesn’t go as well as he hoped.)

ships: Logan/Patton, Roman/Virgil

tw: transph*bia, child ab*se, yelling, dissociation, getting kicked out

---------------

“No, Princey, you’re just wrong. Cool Ranch Doritos are the superior kind; your taste buds are just broken.”

Roman gasped dramatically, and Patton hid a giggle behind his hand. They were currently all sitting at the park on a nice summer's day; Logan right beside him, Roman on his side, Virgil on his other side, and the newest edition, Janus, right across from him.

“You absolute heathen! Spicy Nacho is obviously the best flavor.” Roman glared at Virgil with no real heat, Virgil just smirking back at him until Roman huffed and waved his hand. “It’s no use trying to change your opinion, you’re just always going to be wrong.”

“If I may,” Janus intervened, adjusting his yellow gloves and flicking his eye up to them, “Both of you are wrong. Nacho cheese is arguably the best flavor.”

“Shut up, Janus.” Both Roman and Virgil said at the same time, causing Janus to roll his eye and go back to… whatever he’s reading. Patton didn’t know.

Patton sighed and heard as their continued banter fell into the background. He’s really, really, really stressed today since… well, he’s planning to come out to his parents today.

read on ao3

HIs parents aren’t really kind people, sure, and they say a lot of things that Patton doesn’t agree with. Logan once described them as “emotionally and psychologically abusive” which Patton doesn’t really see. They don’t mean to hurt him, they love him. 

Just because they call him stupid, and ugly, and irresponsible, that doesn't mean they're bad. They're right.

And just because Patton is a little scared to say that he’s trans, that’s a normal thing. It’s a scary situation.

It’ll all be okay.

Liar.

He was cut off from his thoughts by Logan gently taking his hand, sending sparks of warmth down his whole arm. Logan leaned over, his blue eyes seeming to sparkle in the sunlight as he let go of Patton’s hand and started signing. ‘Are you alright?’ 

Patton wondered why he didn’t ask out loud, but then he realized it was probably because he didn’t want to bring attention to Patton in case he didn’t want everyone to know. His heart fluttered -- Logan really is the best.

Patton nodded, about to give Logan a big smile, but then he hesitated. He then shook his head and signed with shaky hands- his ASL isn’t really the best, but he’s learning - ‘I need to tell something to the group.’

Logan nodded and cleared his throat, “Excuse me, if you two would stop.” He said to Roman and Virgil, who had now moved on to which type of Pringle was the best, causing them to stop. “Patton has something to say.”

Patton stiffened as every eye turned to him. Why is he nervous? His friends are some of the most supporting people in the world. They already know he’s trans, so telling them he’s planning to come out tonight shouldn’t make him this jittery.

“What’s up, Popstar? You okay?” Virgil asked, leaning his hands on the table. Janus flicked his eye over to Patton in vague interest, Roman turned his full attention to him, and Logan kept holding his hand under the table.

Patton took a deep breath to shake off all the jittery bugs, and exclaimed, “I’m planning to come out to my parents tonight.”

The reaction was mixed. 

Roman and Logan's eyes both widened in a weird mix of concern and pride. Since Roman and Logan are the only ones who've been over to his house, they have actually met his parents.

Janus lifted his eyebrows in surprise and closed the book he was reading. He then tried to act like he wasn't that interested but failed pretty badly (in his own humble opinion.)

And Virgil leaned over more, with his hands spread out on the table and open concern in his eyes. "Really?! Holy shit!" 

Patton tried for a smile, but it kind of fell flat. "Yeah, uh.. It's a bit nerve wracking, if I'm being honest." 

"I'll say, Pat. That is a very brave thing to do." Roman told him, patting (hah! patt-ing) him on the shoulder.

"I definitely don't support you full-heartedly, of course, but aren't your parents incredibly conservative?" Janus asked, making a motion to check his nails even though they were under his gloves.

Patton was going to answer, but Logan cut him off. "Was that sarcasm?"

Janus nodded, giving him a look that said what do you think?

Logan nodded back and continued on. "Yes, Patton, your parents are very conservative and are close minded about a lot of subjects, especially related to LGBTQ+ issues. Are you sure about this?" 

"Logan, I can't keep this a secret anymore. They deserve to know, they're my parents." Pattons heart felt heavy with guilt; they should have known from the moment he figured it out. They've taken so much care of him, and he repays them by lying?

"You don't owe them anything, Patton. If you truly want to come out, we'll support you, but don't feel guilty for not coming out to them sooner. It is entirely up to you." Janus made direct eye contact with him, and Patton felt like that half blind stare could see into his soul and pick him apart. 

Roman nodded in agreement, but didn't say anything. Patton knows that he has issues with his own sexuality, and he's trying his best, but it can still be an uncomfortable talk for him. Patton's heart ached for his friend.

Logan squeezed his hand, "I agree. Whatever you do is entirely up to you." Patton felt his face warm up when Logan squeezed his hand, and tried to ignore it.

The conversation was silent for a moment while Patton thought it over, until Virgil asked, "Would they hurt you?"

The tension in the air seemed to skyrocket as Patton whipped his head up to look at Virgil, who was anxiously wringing his hands. Logan gave him a fidget cube to play with while Patton spluttered, trying to figure out how to respond.

"N-No! Of course they wouldn't! They've never laid a hand on me before!" 

"Just because it hasn't happened yet, doesn't mean it couldn't happen at any moment." Virgil's eyes went dark with a memory, and Patton once again felt an uncharacteristic anger at Virgil's father. 

Patton reached over, slowly enough that Virgil could stop him if he wanted, and took his hand. "I promise, I'll stay safe." 

Virgil held out his pinky finger, "Pinky promise?"

Patton felt his smile grow wide, and felt a glittering happiness in his heart at how far Virgil had come. "Pinky promise." 

"Okay." Virgil breathed, leaning back as Patton sat back into his seat. Janus watched the exchange quietly, an old sort of nostalgia in his eye. 

"Pinky promise? Are you in kindergarten?" Roman teased Virgil, who slapped his arm playfully.

"Shut the fuck up, off-brand Troy Bolton." Janus immediately burst into laughter, hiding his mouth behind his hand as Roman spluttered. 

"Troy Bolton?!" 

"You play football and you're on the drama team, you're literally Troy Bolton."

"You didn't need to call me out like that, though!" 

Janus was still laughing, and even Logan was trying not to smile, and Patton just… took a moment and admired his friends.

He's known Roman since middle school. Patton was immediately drawn to him, his loud personality complimenting Patton perfectly. 

When Roman was 13, his siblings died. Only he and his brother survived, and from what Patton knows, it's because they weren't in the car with them. He never got to meet any of his siblings, but he knows there were a lot; he wants to say maybe 10, including Roman.

It astounds him that so many people could just… die so quickly like that. 

Roman didn't talk a lot after that happened. And sometimes, these days, he just goes silent. But he's getting better, and Patton couldn't be more proud of him.

His eyes moved to Virgil and he felt his heart ache. Virgil started hanging out with them months ago, around the beginning of sophomore year. His sharp wit, dry humor and sarcastic remarks added something to the group that he didn't know was missing.

Patton can say with confidence that he hates Virgil's father. From what Virgil has told him, after his mom died his dad turned into a completely different person. Constantly beating Virgil around, berating him; he doesn't even keep any food in the house for Virgil to eat.

It makes Patton want to cry, thinking about it. 

Janus… confuses him. He doesn't know much about him, but he does know that Patton's breaking down the walls around Janus's heart little by little every day. Patton does know that he's blind in one eye, he's known Virgil since they were really young, and he too used to hang out with Remus before splitting off to this group-- Patton doesn't know why. He would see them in the halls together a long time ago.

Pattons seen Remus in the hallways. He always wanted to go up and talk to him, see how he was doing, but a part of him… a part of him was a little scared of him. Remus had the reputation of being "the druggie" around school, and as much as Patton hated himself for it, it kind of made him wary to talk to him.

The deep eye bags and the bruised knuckles did always make him worry a bit though. 

He hopes one day he'll muster up the courage to talk to him.

"So, I know what Patton is doing, but what are all of you doing after this? Burning a bank down, perhaps?" Janus inquired the rest of the group.

Logan huffed. "Burning a bank down is illegal. I'm going home to study." 

Roman frowned, "It's summer, calculator watch. You don't need to study." 

"It's good to get a head start on the next year's courses." 

Roman stared at him like he was speaking another language, then shook his head and sighed. "Whatever. I'm going home. I've got to catch up on my beauty routine." He flashed a dazzling smile, and Patton giggled. 

"C-" Virgil stopped and cleared his throat, then spoke again. "Can I come over?" He asked Roman quietly, his voice soft, like he was afraid Roman would say no.

Roman turned to him, clearly surprised, "You want to come over?"

Virgil shook his head and forcefully pushed down on one of the buttons on his fidget cube, "I mean- I don't have to, if you're busy, it's fine-" 

"No! I'm not busy! You can come over!" Roman burst out in one breath, and Virgil looked up at him, mouth open slightly in surprise.

"Oh.. Okay. Cool." Virgil smiled at him hesitantly, and Roman beamed back, and Patton swears there's an emotional connection between them. They look at eachother for way too long for nothing to be going on.

Janus fake gagged at Roman and Virgil, then stood up and adjusted his gloves. "My dad is going to be home for the first time in a while, so I'm going home to eat with him. Right now."

They all said their goodbyes to Janus, who did a little bow and patted Patton's shoulder for good luck. 

Patton felt his phone buzz and got it out, not sure why his stomach dropped when he checked the message he got. 

Momma: Dinners going to be ready soon. Hurry up. 

"I gotta go, kiddos," Patton said, standing up and giving Roman a hug from where Roman was sitting. Logan and Virgil don't usually like hugs, so he didn't bother asking for one. 

"Good luck, sunshine, may good fortune be in your favor!" Roman declared dramatically, hugging him back despite the awkward angle.

"Stay safe, Pat, okay?" Virgil told him, and Patton nodded and said he would. 

Logan only gave him a quick nod, which confused him a bit, but he shrugged it off and walked away to find his bike. 

When Patton found it, he was about to head home, when-- 

"Patton! Wait!" 

Logan was running after him, his 6'4 frame towering over him as he came to a stop, looking oddly nervous. 

Patton smiled at him, "What's up, Lolo?" 

Logan cleared his throat, flapping his hands a bit, "Would you, um. Would you like a hug? I've read that hugs can be optimal for comfort in high stress situations, and today has been a good sensory day, so-" 

Logan was cut off by Patton squealing and rushing into him, Patton making sure not to hold him too tightly.

Golly, Patton doesn't think he's ever met someone like Logan. Meeting him in middle school was probably a miracle. Kind and super duper intelligent, telling him all sorts of facts about space and the ocean. Patton loves to watch Logan infodump to him, flapping his hands and smiling so wide. His heart flips in his chest whenever Logan comes into a room, or whenever he speaks; his smooth voice makes Patton feel safe and at home. 

So, maybe Patton has a crush on Logan. Gosh, can you blame him?

Logan smells like rain water and old leather paper. Patton's face is buried in his chest, coming up to around 5'8 so he's super short compared to him. Logan's strong arms are wrapped loosely around him, and Patton genuinely just-- doesn't want to leave.

He breaks the hug sooner than later, though, because he doesn't want to overwhelm Logan. Patton's pretty sure his cheeks are glowing, and by the looks of it, Logan's are too.

Logan clears his throat again, "...Was that satisfactory?" He asked quietly, and gosh he's so ding dang cute Patton almost can't handle it. 

"It was very satisfactory, Lo." 

Logan smiled down at him, "Well, that's nice to hear. If you ever need anything, you know where to find me, at my house that is." 

Patton nodded, pushing up his circle glasses that ended up slipping down his nose. "I know, Logan, thank you." 

Logan nodded, then stepped back a bit. "Well, I won't keep you. Goodbye Patton. Good luck." 

Patton hopped on his bike, "Bye Lolo!" He waved, before pedaling off.

On his way home, he planned out what he would say. 

He slowly became more and more anxious, but it will be fine.

Everything is going to be fine. 

------------

Everything was not going to be fine.

Patton was pacing around his room, heart racing probably too fast to be considered normal. Dread curled around his stomach like a snake, squeezing and squeezing until it felt like he couldn't breathe.

He can't do this, why did he think he could do this? He can't breathe- 

"Okay, deep breaths, Pat. You're okay." He said out loud to himself. Remembering the breathing exercises that Virgil used, he deeply inhales for 4 seconds, holds for 7, and exhales for 8.

It takes a few more attempts until he's able to breathe normally, but eventually his heart rate slows down a bit. 

Picking up his phone, he sent a message off to the group chat that he and the others all share.

PappyPatton: Wish me luck. dinners about to be ready :))

Logan: Good luck, Patton.

RomanoLettuce: Good luck padre!!!!!! remember to take your sword (I'll give u mine if u want it)

draculawannabe: good luck pat, pls stay safe 

twofacedgay: I hope you have fun, but don't force yourself 

Patton smiled as his chest filled with joy. Gosh, he loves his friends so much. 

"Anna! Dinners ready!" 

Instantly that joy shattered, once again replaced by ice sinking into his stomach. Patton swallowed his nerves and replied, "Coming!" 

He took a deep breath, put his phone in his pocket and went downstairs, praying to whoever would listen that everything would be okay. 

When he got downstairs, his baby sister, Angela, squealed when she saw him and made grabby hands. Patton cooed and pinched her cheeks,"Well hi! I missed you too!" 

Angela gurgled and gave him one of her cheerios from her plate. Patton picked it up with a big smile and popped it in his mouth, then thanked his little sister for the generous offer.

"Anna, sit down. Your mother has had a hard day." His father commanded. Patton swallowed and sat down at the end of the table, looking at his plate. Ugh. Broccoli.

Patton's mother sighed and came out of the kitchen, sitting down and putting her head in her hands. Oh, god, she's in a bad mood. 

She sighed again before sitting up, seeming to shake off the tiredness as she offered her hands to both of them. "Let's say grace before dinner." 

Please, don't. God already knows I'm sinning.

But they did it anyways, and before Patton knew it everyone was digging in. He's not hungry.

His father took note of his and said, "Anna. You need to eat."

His mother turned and saw his still full plate, and sighed at him with disappointment. "I spent all that time making this, and you're not even going to eat it? Ungrateful." 

Patton felt guilt wallow up inside him,wrapping around his throat and choking him, but didn't let it phase him. His mother and father resumed their conversation (something about the stock market, Patton doesn't know) before Patton cleared his throat.

"Um, mom, dad.. I have to tell you something." 

His mother and father stopped, turning to him. His mother looked irritated, you can't do anything right, and his father just looked vaguely curious.

"Is this about your grades? If it is, then we already know your grades. They need to be higher." His mother said.

Patton swallowed again, trembling a little bit, "Uh- n-no, it's not that." 

You can do it, Patton. It's not that hard. 

His father tilted his head, "Then, what? Out with it, girl." 

Patton took a deep breath, stop shaking you're fine everything's fine here we go here we go, and said, his voice trembling, "I'm trans."

Silence. 

Then, his mother started laughing.

Patton looked up at her, confused. Why is she laughing? 

"That's funny, dear." His mom chuckled, mirth dripping from her voice. His father just looked uncomfortable.

"N-no, mom, I'm serious. I'm a-a-a boy." Patton dug his nails into his thigh under the table. "I-I'd actually prefer to go by Patton." 

His mother stopped laughing.

"You're serious?" Her voice had gone unrecognizable. Gone was the laughter and the mirth; now all he heard was rage. The tension in the room had risen to almost unbearable levels.

His stomach curled in on himself as he nodded, "Y-Yeah, I-"

Smack.

Patton recoiled, face swinging to the side as he tried to process what just happened. His cheek started stinging.

She smacked him.

She smacked him.

He didn’t even see her move.

"How could you do this to me, Anna?! To us?!" His mom yelled, oh god she's yelling now, everything is going wrong. 

She stood up, forcefully pushing herself away from the table. His father grabbed her arm, but she shook him off and stared Patton down. 

"Didn't we raise you to know better?! God is going to punish you, Anna!" His mother screamed at him, her face red with rage. "You're going to hell!"

Patton whimpered and flinched hard when a plate was thrown at him, barely managing to dodge. When did she pick up the plate? What is happening?!

Angela was screaming, his mother was screaming, his face hurt from the slap, this wasn't how this was supposed to go-

He doesn't know when he started crying, burying himself in his trembling arms, trying to make the noise go away. He felt like he was watching this happen through a window, or on a TV screen. This couldn’t be real.

"Diana, please," his father tried to interject, but was cut off by his mother.

"No, Michael! She's sinning! She thinks she's a boy!" His mother shrieked and Patton cringed in on himself, trying to remember the breathing exercises that Virgil uses, trying to stop crying.

"M-m-mom, I'm s-sorr-" he tried to say, lifting his shaking head up slightly, before he was backhanded so hard he fell out of his chair to the floor and the room was spinning.He vaguely noticed his glasses falling off; his mother stepped on them with a loud crack.

Patton tried to regain his breath, his ears ringing, before he felt his shirt being pulled and him being forced to stand.

His mother stood before him, her eyes filled with tears and rage and hatred.

"Get out." She said, oh so quietly.

What? Was she kicking him out? Ice cold dread wrapped around his chest, sinking into his stomach like a stone. No no no no please-

"B-but I-"

She smacked him again, hard enough to make his nose bleed, "Get out, get out, get out! Don't come back until you've opened up your heart to the lord!" She screamed, sending him into a full blown terror. His heart raced, as he scrambled up the stairs, hearing the yelling continue from downstairs. He didn't even look at what he was taking, he just threw in random things, trying to get out of there as fast as possible. Patton’s heart raced with adrenaline and panic as he stuffed everything into a Wal-Mart bag. Was he crying? He didn't know. All he knew was that he needed to get out of there.

Patton ran back downstairs, desperately just wanting to leave, before she got even more angry. He made eye contact with his father, who just glared at him and looked away.

His baby sister was still shrieking and crying. His mother was standing over the table, surrounded by broken glass, shoulders tense with anger.

She turned to face Patton, and the rage that seemed to simmer down sprung to life again.

"Get the fuck out! I don't want to see your face again, Anna!" She spat his deadname, like it was poison.

Patton didn't hesitate, scrambling to the door and running out into the freezing night air, holding his bag close to his chest.

"God is going to punish you!" His mother shrieked from the house, and that was the last thing he heard before he started running.

Patton didn't even have his glasses; he could barely see. He was running so hard his chest started to hurt, combined with the cold night air, made him want to cough. Adrenaline coursed through Patton's veins, coursing alongside the crushing fear of what would happen if he didn't get away.

But he didn't even know where he was going. Where does he go now?

One word popped into the back of his mind, and he knew that was where he had to go. 

Logan.

---------------

Patton doesn't know how long it took to get to Logan's house. Everything is blurry from his lack of glasses, and his chest hurts and his face hurts and everything hurts-

He knew the outline of Logan's house, though, and suddenly he was on the front porch, knocking urgently. 

God is going to punish you.

Patton felt like he was floating. Like he could look down and see his own body standing there; he's pretty sure there's a term for that, but he can't remember it right now.

Everything is going numb; whether that's from the cold or otherwise, he doesn't care.

How could you do this to me? To us?

Patton had stopped crying a few blocks back- now, everything is just cold numbness. 

Patton was jerked out of his thoughts when the front door opened, revealing Logan's giant form.

"Did you forget your ke- oh, Patton. What are you doing here? Are- Are you alright?" Logan tilted his head as he stared at Patton in concern.

Patton must look like a mess- dried tears and snot and a little blood, big red slap mark on his cheek, no glasses and a Wal-Mart bag.

Patton shook his head, trying to get rid of the ever present nothing that he felt. "Uh- not really, Lolo." His voice was rough and scratchy from crying.

Logan's eyes darted down to the Wal-Mart bag, then to the slap mark on his face and lack of glasses, and just- stared.

The silence went on for a while, and Patton turned to leave. I shouldn't have bothered him, I bother everyone god is going to punish you 

"I'm sorry." Patton said, his voice small, "I didn't mean to bother you. I can go-"

"No!" Logan exclaimed, making Patton flinch and turn back around.  Logan looked sheepish from his outburst and wrung his hands a bit, "Apologies for startling you. Please, come in." Logan stepped aside so that Patton could come in, still eyeing the Wal-Mart bag.

Patton walked in and let Logan direct him to the couch. Patton always liked Logan's house. The layout was similar to his, but it had the comfort and warmth that his own home (don't come back until you've opened your heart to the lord) was missing. 

"Let me- um- let me get you some water. And a blanket." Logan mumbled before hurrying off, leaving Patton alone with his thoughts.

He could hear the water running. He could hear Logan rummaging around in the closet, probably looking for a blanket. Logically, he knows where he is.

But he feels just- disconnected from his body.

Why in the world did he think that coming out to them would be a good idea? Patton knows their views, he should have been smarter, shouldn't have been so trusting-

Maybe Patton's prayer went unanswered because Patton deserved this. Maybe this is his punishment.

And now he's bothering Logan,the best person in the world, with his burdens. He's probably overwhelming him. God, he can't do anything right. 

"Here." Logan draped a large, blue, soft blanket over Patton's shoulders. He gently handed him the glass of water, keeping his hands raised in case Patton's shaky hands dropped it.

"Thank you." Patton's voice felt wrong to his own ears as he took a sip of water. It soothed his raw throat, and after a few sips he was glad he could speak correctly again.

Logan stayed silent, aside from the continuous tapping on his leg. Patton knows he must have questions, so he sets the glass down and curls his knees into his chest, giving him silent permission to ask.

And that's just what Logan did. "Patton… what happened?" Logan's voice was quiet, concerned. Patton shrugged, cracking an empty smile that fell 2 seconds after he put it up.

"I came out. It- uh- didn't go so well." He tried to giggle, but it was watery and he suddenly has the urge to cry cry cry cry. 

"What happened to your glasses? Why do you have a Wal- ...Oh." Logan's went silent again, but this time you could basically feel the rage in the air. "How dare they." 

Logan sounded angry. Patton instinctively curled up more, an apology on the tip of his tongue, but Logan cut him off before he could. 

"No, Patton, I'm not mad at you, I just-" Logan took a deep breath and flapped out his hands a bit, "Did they kick you out?" He was straight to the point.

Patton nodded.

Logan swore and bit down on his knuckle, and Patton realized with a start that there were tears in Logan's eyes. Why is he crying?! God I made him sad too what is wrong with me?!

Patton jumped up, "Oh, you're crying! I'm so sorry, Logan!" Patton tried to apologize, but Logan shook his head and wiped his eyes. 

"It's- It's fine. Do not worry about it." Logan took a deep breath, in and out, and then looked at Patton again. 

"Patton I- I am so sorry that happened to you. That never should have happened, ever. Your parents should have been accepting and kind to who you really are. I'm so sorry they weren't." 

Patton shrugged again, not feeling so numb anymore as he looked down and bit back the tears in his throat. 

Logan scooted over and took his hand.

And then the dam broke. 

Patton started sobbing- gut wrenching tears were dragged out of him, as he put his head in his hands and let the sobs wrack his body. It hurts so much, everything hurts so much- 

He was vaguely aware of his body being maneuvered, and suddenly his head was on Logan's chest, and Logan's hand was in his hair, and he was whispering- not reassurances, but just facts.

"Your name is Patton. You have brown eyes and dirty blonde hair, bordering on brown. You have freckles and a gap in your teeth. You adore frogs and butterflies." Logan kept up a steady whisper of facts about Patton, as Patton kept crying into Logan. 

He cried for about 10 minutes before the tears finally slowed, and he could sit up from Logan's chest but he doesn't want to. Even though he made a wet spot on Logan's pajamas, and is probably bothering him with this whole thing, he doesn't want to leave. 

"Please don't make me leave." Slipped out before he could stop it, and he felt his ears heat with shame. 

"Oh, Patton- You're not leaving. You are staying right here." Logan sounded like he was crying, too, and that just made Patton feel awful.

"In fact, you're staying with us from now on. You're going to live here." Patton's mind screeched to a halt as he looked back up at Logan. What? 

"What?" 

"You're staying here. My mom's can be your legal guardians." Logan looked completely serious.

Patton's mind was spinning. Could they do that? Isn't that against the law?

"If we have your biological parents permission, you can stay here all you want. My mom's can go get your stuff tomorrow. Patton, you are not going back there. You deserve to have a safe home, where you can be yourself without having to be afraid or belittled. You deserve safety." 

And- and- 

And Patton thought the tears were done, but apparently they weren't, and he started sobbing again into Logan's night shirt. 

He felt dizzy with relief, his chest contracting in an almost painful way. 

He's going to be okay. 

With Logan whispering gentle facts in his ear, and Logan's heartbeat under his other ear, and the voice of his mother in his head getting quieter. 

God is probably still going to punish him. But that's later.

Because right now Patton can feel Logan's breathing and feel his voice echo through his chest as he talks quietly with his mom's, who apparently Patton didn't hear coming through the door.

Patton had one last, coherent thought before slipping into unconsciousness.

I'm going to be okay.

[of-storms-and-sadness]

Maybe a little

Pairing: Daryl x Reader

Wordcount: 1500ish

Requested by: @pastanest​ (Hope you like it, and thaaank youu so much for reading and commenting on all my stuff, your feedback has literally given me life :D)

**

Daryl’s spread out on the couch, laying flat on his back while staring at the darkness that gets lit by an occasional lightning somewhere in the distance. He knows that the stormy clouds are coming closer, as the night sky lights up a tiny bit more every time the lightning strikes again. It’s going to be any minute now, he knows it. There’s no way for you to sleep through it. A small smile is already tugging on his lips and he shakes his head, just thinking about it. He can almost hear your running footsteps already, thumping hurriedly down the stairs.

Many things have changed since the day he bumped into you - but this one didn’t.

*

“You make a step further and I swear to god…” Your voice is packed with threat and your eyes narrowed as you hold your gun up at the guy. The damn thing’s not even loaded, you ran out of bullets ages ago, but not like he can know that. He doesn’t seem to be scared by it though, or by you - so he’s either stupid or he’s fearless. You’re not exactly sure. Maybe he’s just a good enough judge of character to know straight out that you wouldn’t fire that gun. One thing you know for sure though, is that the guy’s hot as fuck, but that’s not exactly a valid criteria for anything nowadays. It’s a stupid thought you try to shake out of your head as you stare into his pair of sky blue’s, nearly hypnotized. Maybe you’re just not that scary looking, despite the fact you probably reassemble a rabid woodland critter at this point. It’s just another thing you’re not sure of though, since you’re trying to avoid mirrors. Not because you’re a damn vampire, but simply because you might get spooked by your own reflection. You probably stink something awful too, but he’s not much better either. Because - a shower? What is that even?

The man inches closer, hands held up in surrender. “Not gonna hurt ya, woman,” he grumbles lowly, but you don’t buy it. You’re determined in your intent to keep him away, not completely stupefied by his good looks and gravelly voice.

“Right, and I should believe it just ‘cause you said it,” you scoff and he doesn’t say anything, just shrugs and glances out through the stained window glass. 

“A’right look,” he starts, gesturing towards the window, “there’s a storm comin’. Looks like ‘s gonna be a bad one....was lookin’ for a place to hole up in for the night.”

You narrow your eyes some more, peeking at him through your lashes. “There’s no fuckin’ storm, I don’t hear or see nothin’,” you say, shaking your head in disbelief, but a slight distant rumble that does sound like thunder makes your eyes snap over to the window. “You a fuckin’ weatherman or what?” You don’t like it. You don’t wanna be holed up in here with this stranger, but being alone would be so much worse. And you sure as hell won’t be the one to leave your shelter. Not now, knowing that there was a storm coming. He doesn’t look like he’s about to leave either. You can’t detect a single trace of fear from you in his features as your eyes scan his face and his posture. You definitely gotta work some more on your act of scaring strangers away. You sigh and lower your gun. “Alright, you can stay," you mumble in utter annoyance, not wanting to let on that you're actually kinda relieved to have him here to keep you safe from a fuckin' thunderstorm. "But don't you come near me." You walk over to the blanket you spread on the floor before he came and disturbed you, and you curl up, leaning against the wall.

Again, he doesn’t say anything. Just grunts and nods, then walks over to sit in another corner. But it’s been so long since you’ve had anyone around who you could talk to, and after a short while of stealing glances at the guy, you can’t help yourself. Your stupid tongue refuses to listen, mind desperate for something to distract it from the storm that’s creeping closer. “So, you’re gonna leave when the storm passes?” you ask. He grunts. Not much of a talker obviously. Just your fuckin’ luck. You press your eyes shut as lightning ripples across the sky. You know what’s next and you try to prepare yourself for it, but you still wince when the thunder rumbles. Your eyes open once it’s over and you catch his pair of blue’s staring at you through the candle light. Yes, candles. Because the dark kinda scares you a bit. Not as much as thunder does, though. “Must be cold to sit down on the concrete," you mumble again. He looks at you, but he doesn't seem to catch on to what you meant by it. You roll your eyes and pat the empty spot on your blanket. "Or do you need a written invitation? Want it with a bow, should I sprinkle glitter over it? Get your ass over here!" 

You see him tilt his head in confusion as he grumbles something again, shuffling up to his feet. 

"Ya been alone long?" He asks as he slumps down to your blanket, obviously smitten by your overwhelming hospitality.

As if you know, time doesn’t mean shit no more. You shrug. "I guess." Your gaze is trained on the stained window, but you feel his eyes boring into the back of your skull, as he actually tries to start a conversation. He tells you he has a group, asks you a bunch of stupid questions that make you stare at him blankly for a moment before you answer, feeling like you were being evaluated. “Don’ know how many dead I’ve killed, didn’t count. Were dead already, so I figured it didn’t matter. It’s not really killing, right?” The room gets lit up by lightning and you close your eyes, preparing for the thunder. It's closer now, louder. You wince. You narrow your eyes when he asks the same question about people. You didn’t kill people. Well, you did kill one, but that’s only because he hadn’t given you much choice, he was already half dead when you stumbled into him. The man nods at your explanation. “You got a name?” you ask and he says it’s Daryl. Kinda suits him nicely, you think as your eyes give him a thorough once-over, mumbling out your own name before you focus back on the window.

“Ya afraid of thunder?” 

His question makes you look back at him and you scoff, very aware of how silly that is, but yes, you're afraid. Is it really that obvious though? "That's just ridiculous!" You answer, avoiding to look at him. “‘Course I’m not afraid of thunder. That’s just silly -” But as you speak, the small storage room gets all bright again and you try to brace yourself for what’s coming. It’s so loud this time though, so close. The glass on the windows clatters slightly and you squeal, your hands flying towards his arm and you grab and squeeze it tight for a moment. 

Shit!

You inhale sharply and release your grip on him, hiding your face in your hands in embarrassment. “Maybe a little,” you mumble, totally shamefaced, making him snort in laughter.

*

He kind of always thought you are adorable. From the moment he first laid eyes on you. Didn’t matter much that you had your gun raised at him back then. You were trying so hard to look like a badass, but all you did was make his knees feel weak. He did learn later on that you in fact are a badass. You’re strong, brave. Sometimes you seem fearless even. Stupidly and unnecessarily reckless, infuriating him with your actions more times than not. But more than once had he also caught himself admiring you while you fought - walkers, people - it didn’t matter anymore, they were no match for your fiercefullness. But then a thunderstorm comes and so do you, running to him to keep you safe from harm. He chuckles to himself, catching on the familiar sound of you gasping in horror as the door to your bedroom flies open just in time for a loud roar of thunder from the outside. His chuckle morphs into a bark of laughter as you come running down the stairs and peak your head into the living room. You scowl, seeing his smiling, knowing expression.

“Asshole! You left the bed on purpose again,” you mutter and slump down beside him. “You make fun of me one more time and I’ll steal one of your bolts and stick it up your ass!” 

He cackles and shakes his head. “Heard that one already. Yer repeatin’ yerself,” he says with a grin, as you lay down beside him and snuggle up to his side, still feeling offended, but also too afraid while at the same time too comfortable to give a damn. 

[thekitteninlove]

Okay, so i wrote another fanfic. This one is much longer, 3000+ words or 6 pages. I put some more romance in it too, since i realized the other ones kinda lack that and i want more romance. This is my way of coping with my love for Dean

Characters: Dean Tweedle

Warning: R 18+

Title: Teacher's pet, part 1

I was in the schoolyard with my friend, Maya. We were on a break, so we decided to just take a walk outside.

“So, do you wanna go to the club tonight?” she asked me

“Again? Didn’t you go to one yesterday? When do you sleep?”. Our personalities were completely different. Unlike me, she was an extrovert who liked to party. She was always cheerful, so her presence lightened my mood.

“Well, you know, during classes or after I get back from school. So, what do you say? Wanna come?”

“Nope, you know I don’t like those kinda places. The music is too damn loud. I’m gonna go deaf in there. Besides which I have to study for the finals”

“Ugh, we still have plenty of time. You should take a break and relax sometimes. You know how the saying goes, all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.”

“I think I take enough breaks. I have my own way of having fun. I’m worried that if I take more breaks I’ll fall behind in my studies and I don’t want to disappoint the teachers”. Actually, I think I have a fear of disappointing them. I wonder if this fear has a name.

“Right. How could I forget you’re teacher’s pet whose hobby is to please the teachers.”

“You’re saying that like it’s a bad thing, but my future is at stake here”

“Oh, come on, don’t be so dramatic. It’s not like your future will be destroyed if you spend a bit more time socializing. How about getting a boyfriend? Love will definitely make you happier.”

Love? I immediately thought of Dean and my heart started beating faster. I don’t know when I started having those feelings for him. It feels like it happened gradually. The feelings kept getting stronger and stronger. I began to look forward to his lessons, although I don’t particularly enjoy history. I think I love him, but he only sees me as his student, nothing more. He’s the perfect teacher, always going out of his way to help his students. He’s out of my league. I doubt he’d even consider a girl like me a potential partner. But I can’t find anyone else I’d like to date. Most of the boys in my class were acting like 5 year olds. During breaks, the classroom becomes a battlefield because they start fighting over trivial stuff, which is why we’re outside. They put bugs in girls’ bags or they play with paper airplanes. They’re high schoolers, not primary school kids, but they don’t seem to have matured much since then. There are a few other boys who act their age, but their taken. Figures. I sighed.

“I noticed how you’ve been looking at Dean” Maya said after a moment with a grin on her face. “You look at him like he’s the love of your life”

“What!? No way! Was I that obvious? Has anyone else noticed that? I don’t want him to know that. That’ll be embarrassing.” I felt my cheeks redden. I didn’t realize I was letting my emotions show on my face. I hope he didn’t notice that

“Emma, you should tell him your feelings or you’ll regret you never did that. What’s there to lose? At least give it a go. You can’t know what someone else is feeling unless you ask them.”

“Ugh, i… I guess you have a point. I’ll try to tell him how I feel” I was a bit reluctant and scared that he was going to reject me and break my heart.

“You’ll not ‘try’, you’ll do it. And don’t say ‘tie me up, teacher’. Confess like a normal person. ‘I love you’ is all you need to say to convey your feelings”

“Hey, why would you think I’d say that?” I was shocked at what she said and I tried to push away the thoughts of Dean tying me up and having his way with me

“Because that’s how masochists confess their love, duh” she said matter-of-factly

“I’m not a masochist”. Well, I guess I was a bit, but I wasn’t going to admit that.

“Uh-huh, sure thing.” She said in a teasing voice

Dammit, I need to change the subject. “So, uh… how’s it going with your boyfriend? I’ve seen him stealing your bag many times just to get your attention. He’s so childish, how can you stand that?”

“Well, he can get annoying at times, but I still like him. What I like the most about him is that he has a great sense of humor. I always laugh at his jokes”

That’s true. I really like his jokes too. I, on the other hand, suck at telling jokes. People think I’m serious when I make them. I should just give up. I like him, but he certainly isn’t my type.

The sound of the bell signaled the end of the break, so we made our way back to class. Hopefully, they didn’t destroy anything.

After the lectures were over I went to the library. I was still thinking about what my friend said. How will I go about it? What if he rejects me? I heard about the broken heart syndrome. It’s like a heart attack, but it can be caused by a sudden rush of extreme emotions. I hope he won’t break my heart, figuratively and literally speaking. I’m so anxious I can hardly concentrate on this book. Next time I get the chance to speak with him privately I need to tell him I love him. But he’s so busy. I wish I had more opportunities to talk to him. I doubt I could find a man as good as him anywhere else. He’s the only one I desire. I wonder why I feel so attracted to him. I’ve read in a book that researchers study animal behavior to explain certain behaviors in humans. It says that people are looking for a mate whose genes would increase the chance of survival of their offspring. Maybe I subconsciously want Dean’s genes. But is there all there is to it? I was so distracted by my thoughts I couldn’t hear the footsteps behind me.

“The library is closed. You’re not supposed to be here” said a stern voice behind me

“Whoa!” I exclaimed in surprise and turned around to find Dean standing there with an amused expression on his face. When I looked toward the windows I realized it was already dusk. Time passes so fast

“It’s closing time.” He corrected himself. “You need to go home”

“Oh, right” I was about to pack my things and go, but then I realized that this might be the opportunity I was looking for. “Um, I need to tell you something” I was starting to get nervous

“Yes? Do you need help with something?” he asked

His kindness warmed my heart. This was one of the things I loved about him. “Uh, i… I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately” I was quite anxious, but I tried to keep my voice steady. “but I’ve only recently realized that i…” I felt that my heart was about to explode from all the intense emotions I was feeling. Nervousness. Love. Excitement. I felt a surge of adrenaline, like I just drank coffee. Never before have I felt this way. It was something new. I felt like I was suffocating, like I was drowning in my own feelings. “I love you” I finally said it and looked at him expectantly

He opened his eyes wide. It was clear he wasn’t aware of this. Silence fell between us and after a moment that seemed to last forever he said in a confused voice “Are you sure? I’m not as good as you think I am”

Huh? He’s less confident than I thought he was. Well, that fine by me. He doesn’t have to be that confident for me to like him. “I think I am and I want to get to know you better. So would you like to go on a date?” I was feeling hopeful. He didn’t reject me straight away. It seems like I might just have a chance with him.

“Well,” he smiled “if you think you can handle me then I accept your invitation. I also want to get to know my pet better”

Wow! I can’t believe it! He said yes! YES, YES, YES! Damn, I’m so lucky. This is the luckiest day of my life. How come this hunk doesn’t have a girlfriend? Well, who cares about that, he’s mine now. I felt like dancing with joy.

He began to close the distance between us. “I will teach you about real love”. He lifted my chin up with his index finger and I looked up into his beautiful dark grey eyes. My heart began to beat faster as he moved closer and then pressed his lips against mine. I felt a rush of excitement at the sensation of his warm lips brushing against mine. I didn’t expect this. He then licked my lips and I slightly parted them to let him slip his tongue in. Our tongues coiled around each other and I felt the need to move even closer to him. I put my hands in his hair to deepen the kiss and he put his arms on my hips and pushed me against the bookshelves. He then pressed his body against mine and I let out a small gasp.

“You’re my pet. I won’t let anyone else have you. I’m your only master, do you understand?”

“Yes, master” I don’t want anyone else but him. My heart belongs to him.

“Good girl.” He smiled and kissed me again. This time he was more passionate than before. I ran my hands through his hair as he removed his gloves and slowly slid one of his hands up my outer thigh and used the other to massage my lower back.

“Mmmh” I felt myself gradually becoming hotter. I want him to do more. I want his genes in me. I hope we won’t get caught, but by now most of the students and staff should’ve left. He’s usually among the last ones to leave. He broke away from the kiss and started nibbling my neck, while his hands slid under my skirt and took off my undies, then I felt his hand rub me between my legs. I was trying not to make much noise in case there were still people in the school, but it was getting hard to control my voice and I let out a moan. “Ahh, Dean, I want you in” I was breathing hard and tightly gripping his hair. He slowly inserted two fingers in me and moved them in and out. At this point I couldn’t think straight as I pushed myself against his hand wanting more. “Ohh, I love you, Dean. I want you so badly”. He then used his other hand to take off his pants and underwear, took out a condom from his pocket and put it on.

“Put your legs around me, I’ll hold you” he said as he put his hands on my hips to hold me up

I did as he said and then he began to insert his shaft little by little in me. He tried not to move too much so that I could adjust to it. I put my hands on his back and held him tightly to me. My heart was beating wildly in my chest. I’d be surprised if he didn’t hear it. My desire for him overcame my anxiety and I began to move my hips back and forth. He then gripped my hips more tightly and began to move too. I was digging my nails into his back, moaning and calling his name. “Ahhh, I love you” I said in between breaths. I could hear him moaning close to my ear, which made me even more aroused. I then felt his warm and wet tongue on my neck and a bit of pain as he bit it. “Oh~, Dean~”. I felt myself getting closer and closer to the climax. He began moving faster and I could feel he was starting to lose the last bit of control he had on his body.

“Ohhh, you’re… mmh… such a… haa… naughty pet” he managed to say between moans “for tempting me… aah… I’ll… nnnh… punish you” he then bit my neck again and I moaned out his name as I arched my back and came. His movements became erratic and he soon came after me as he moaned my name in my ear.

We were breathing hard and it took a while until we regained our composure and got dressed.

“We need to clean ourselves, so we can go to my place to take a bath if you want to. I know you live farther away and you’re sweaty. You’ll catch a cold if you stay for too long outside like this” he said

It was nice of him to suggest this and I agreed to his proposal. I needed to clean myself. ASAP

It only took a few minutes to reach his apartment. After he turned on the water for the bath we sat down at the table to eat some food. This feels like a dream. I can’t believe this actually happened. I didn’t think he’d do this. Dum warned me that he was a corrupted teacher, but I didn’t believe him. But now I see he’s not as perfect as I imagined him to be. Although I don’t mind it. It felt better than I imagined it would be like. I felt my cheeks grow hot as I remembered what we did. To think he’d do something like that… Curiosity got the better of me and I asked him “Why did you agree to date me and why…” I trailed off trying to find the right words “why did you touch me like that?”

He stopped eating and turned his gaze to me. “I’ve had my sights set on you for a long time now. But I’m a teacher and hitting on a student would be considered outrageous. I was relieved to hear that you were feeling the same way about me. I was starting to worry that I needed to wait until you graduated to confess my love to you. Although…” he paused “we’ll have to keep this a secret. The others might jump to some false conclusions and I don’t want that. I care about my reputation. So could you keep it a secret?”

I was a bit disappointed that we had to keep this a secret, but as long as I could stay by his side I was happy. “Sure thing” I responded

“Great. I think the bath is almost ready, so let me spoil you for all your hard work”

We went to the bathroom, where he started taking off his clothes one by one. I watched him strip taking in his muscular body. Mmh, lookin’ good there, teach’. Looks like someone’s going to the gym. I heard he knows martial arts. Perhaps because he felt like I was staring at him he looked at me and grinned.

“Aren’t you going to undress?”

Oh, right, I should do it too. After we took off our clothes we went to soak in the warm water. The bathtub was large enough for both of us, so we sat across from each other. Ugh, it feels a bit awkward. The strained silence was broken by his voice.

“They say that actions speak louder than words. I want to praise you for being such a good pet, so come over here and let me spoil you” he said with a smile

I moved closer to him. Then, as I was closing the distance, he grabbed my shoulders and pulled me into a kiss. It was hot and passionate and I felt like I was melting in his arms. I could feel the warmth of his body against mine and his hands holding me tightly to his chest. I wrapped my legs around his hips as I placed my hands on his back. I could feel his thing harden, so I slid one of my hands down to stroke it. He then let out a moan and bit my lip, which made me gasp. He then placed his hands on my butt and squeezed it.

“Mmmh, Dean”

His lips moved to my ear and whispered “Your grades are… mmh… so good, I need to… haa… praise you… nnh… more” then licked my ear

“Yes, praise me more, teacher~” I said in a husky voice. I stopped stroking his cock and began to move my hips against his, feeling his hardness between my legs. It was getting hotter and hotter and that wasn’t only because of the water.

He grabbed my hips and began to put it in and I heard his voice close to my year “You’re such a… nnnh… good pet… ahhh” his hips were moving to and fro now and he was panting hard “a really… ohh… good pet… mmmh”

“Ahhh, I love you… mmh… master~” I was holding him tightly and moaning. I need him so much. I love him more than anything else in the world. I was getting closer and closer to my peak and as I felt him tighten his hold on my hips I moaned out his name and came. I felt him take it out and i realized he hasn’t finished yet, so I put my hands on his shaft and started rubbing it

“Ahhh… yes… do it like that… mmh” I heard him moan. He then gripped my shoulders and started licking my neck. “faster… nnh”

I started moving my hands faster around his thing. I felt it throbbing under my hands. It feels so good to hear his moans and know that I’m the one making him feel this way. After some more rubbing he came and took me in his arms. He began to caress my back, moving his hand down my back and back again. This feels so relaxing. We stayed like that for a while and then got out of the water. Since it was so late he let me stay at his place and lent me one of his shirts to sleep in.

We were lying in bed, in each other’s arms, when he said “I don’t want to ever let you go, even after you graduate… will you still want to stay by my side? Even though you know how I truly am?”

“Yes, I will. My heart belongs to you. I’m all yours”

“I’m all yours too” he said and gave me a quick kiss

I felt so relaxed and happy right now like I’ve never had before. My friend was right. Love makes you happier.

[indecisivedolly]

Silent Words - Chapter 4

Word count: 1418

Warnings: cursing, angst and fighting, a little more fluff (i’m starting to go soft on y’all)

A/N: lmfao y’all 💀 I apologize okay, I don’t have anything to say for myself. I promise better times, better chapters and more frequent updates for the future 😳

Upon arriving at the safehouse, Y/N got out of the car before Bucky could park. She felt so relieved by fulfilling her father’s first wish that the young woman felt happy, so happy she could cook. In the meanwhile, Bucky was slightly startled seeing Y/N in such a chipper mood. The last time he checked, she had the blood of a man on her hands; literally. Even he always felt some sort of dreadfulness after killing the evilest people, and he’s killed a lot of people. After parking the car, he entered the house and heard the clinking of pots and pans and a hummed melody. He gulped, something must be seriously wrong. Is this her way of dissociating from what she just did?

“Y/N....” He said hesitantly. She hummed and turned around, looking at him expectantly.

He took in her appearance before he spoke.

“What- what are you doing?” Bucky stammered.

“Well, since I’ve had such a productive day, I figured I’d cook a nice dinner to celebrate the day!” Still as chipper as in the car.

He blinked, unable to say anything.

Her chipper attitude slowly turned into confusion, then into annoyance. “Are you gonna keep looking at me like you’ve peed your pants or are you gonna tell me what’s wrong?” She huffed.

“You’re... Covered in blood.” He said quietly, looking at her once crisp white shirt.

Her eyebrows shot up while her hand grabbed the nearest pan lid to look at herself. “Oh... Oh.” She slowly put down the lid and left the kitchen.

Bucky turned his body to watch her go. He hesitated to check up on her, but since he didn’t want any more scolding from her, he decided to finish making dinner instead.

Thirty minutes later, Y/N joined Bucky in the kitchen. Even though he wasn’t facing her, he knew that she was holding that envelope. She started reading.

My second wish is that you give Jackson Frazier my cigars. He used to love clipping cigars and smoking them, give him my 5x39 bundles.

“This is a 39 gun, if you shoot someone five times you get 5x39.” Dad shot me a knowing look, pay attention. “Like the cigars! You clip the head off and smoke ‘em. I would murder for one of those right now.” She nodded four times.

Bucky looked at her after she was quiet too long. She’s all up in her thoughts again, he thought. He patiently waited for her to snap out of it while scooping the food onto the plates.

“He wants me to take out Jackson Frazier too. He owed my dad big money but never paid him. A 5x39 means shooting someone five times with a 39 gun.” She said.

He nodded. He placed the plates, forks and cups on the table and got a bottle of wine. Even though he couldn’t get drunk, he liked the taste of it.

Bucky and Y/N sat across each other and quietly ate dinner.

“Have you ever killed someone.. before today?”

She was about to have another bite from the heavenly dinner when Bucky’s timid voice broke the silence. He’s a good cook, but he can’t stop talking at the most inappropriate times to save his life. “Yes.” The fork quickly entered her mouth before he could ask another question.

“Do you feel okay though?” He said, voice more secure.

Her fork clinked against her plate and a loud sigh screeched the air. The woman opposite Bucky looked up to the sky and folded her hands together. “Dear God, even though I’m not really religious, please for the love of God -that would be you- make him shut the fuck up. Sorry for cursing.” The last part she added quickly. Then, her fork picked up its journey back to her mouth.

“Do you constantly have to be this stingy? I’m just trying to have a conversation with you and that won’t really work if you keep acting like this all the time.” Bucky said, tired of her attitude.

Y/N stared at him. “Do you seriously think you have the right to call me out on my behavior?” Silence. “No really, do you?” The chair fell back because of her standing so abruptly.

Her anger started to build up. “Because I think I’m the one who should do that. You left me waiting for you, you promised me you’d come back and went on to crush my fucking hope as if I had plenty of it laying around. Do you enjoy hurting people? Is that it?”

There it was, he thought.

She took a step towards Bucky.

“No, Y/N.” His voice laced with pain, still sitting down while his eyes are glued to the table.

She started shouting; “Did you sleep better, knowing that there was someone out there waiting for you and slowly losing hope? Not knowing whether they should move on or keep waiting?”

Bucky’s body went rigid, she couldn’t say that. His emotions were trying to escape from his body, but they were unable to do so. “You- you can’t say that. You know you can’t say that.” His voice cracked while he clenched his fists. Even though her face was inches from his, he didn’t dare to look at her.

“No, after all those years of leaving me in the fucking dark, I think I have the right to call you out on your shit. Do you know what my father used to do with people who break their promises? Do you know what he usually did with dishonest people? Two bullets in the mouth and two in the heart. Two in the mouth so that they can never use their tongue for dishonesty again.” Gasps to compensate for the lack of air running through her lungs, their faces were closer to each other than realized. “And two to the heart to feel the heartbreak they have caused.” She walked away from him to the living room.

Bucky snapped. He shot up, followed her and roughly grabbed Y/N by her upper arm with his right hand, not trusting his metal one. “Have you got any fucking idea what I have been through? And I don’t even mean my whole life, I mean after I lost you in Bucharest. I found my friend, I lost myself and then him again. How on earth could I face you, knowing that I’m broken and could hurt you?” Bucky’s loud voice echoed.

Y/N finally looked into his eyes and was startled to see those deep blue eyes filled with sadness.

“I tried to fix myself and as I finally started making progress, they pulled me into another fight. I didn’t want to fight anymore, Y/N. I really didn’t. I wanted peace. But I still fought. I fought for my friend only for him to leave me again. I’ve been God knows where for 5 fucking years, dead maybe? I don’t fucking know. So I’m sorry for not coming back to you any sooner and I’m sorry for making you feel like I broke my promise. I was working on myself to be better for you.” Panting, Bucky let go of her arm and sat down on the couch to recover from his outburst. “Everything I did at the time, every choice I made, I did it all for you.” Bucky said softly, his body now slouched forward, elbows on his knees and his head in his hands.

Y/N couldn’t look at him, but the sound of Bucky getting up and leaving rang loudly through her mind long after he left. She decided to sit down on the couch. Suddenly, all those feelings that have been pushed away throughout the years hit like a wave and she choked out a sob. How could I be so selfish? How could I only think about how I felt without thinking about his feelings? She let out a loud and unexpected sob without even realizing it. Shocked, her hand rushed to her mouth to try and stop herself. I don’t really want to crop up my feelings anymore, she thought. And out they went, until her headache and dry mouth replaced themselves with sleep. After an unknown amount of time, Y/N felt someone lift her from the couch and placed onto a much softer surface. Sleep and consciousness took their turns on her. Before she fully emerged into sleep, a sweet whisper filled her ears;

“I would’ve found you and come back to you, I always come back to you.”

Taglist:

@saiyanprincessswanie @disasterbii @zaynzierulez @kingbuckyx @ms-marisz

[psyleedee]

Sweet, Spice and Everything Not Nice.

(Inspired by the iconic™ hot chilli Jen/Danneel/Misha moment but Destiel).

dean/castiel, secret relationship, accidental coming out, crack, humor, implied blowjobs, poor sammy.

-2k words.

-psyleedee.

There's a new diner opened up just a mile away from the Bunker, and already, Dean has heard so much about it. Last Tuesday, when he went for a milk run and stumbled into Ms. Davey, she was strangely keen about the new chilli poppers the diner was serving. Dean had smiled and brushed her off with a sure, I'll try it out, and he'd gone his way. Come Thursday, he'd stumbled into Chris, the local pawn shop owner, and they'd fallen into easy conversation, before Chris had spoken up about the diner. Said they had the best damn chilli poppers he'd ever seen. Dean didn't need anymore convincing.

Turns out Sam did.

And after weeks of goading Sam and riling him up to the point where he slammed a fist on the table and said Jesus Christ, Dean, you say the word chilli poppers again and I'll shove one right up your ass, Dean had succeeded. So what if it meant his dignity had crumbled to ash? At least he'd get to eat some good, greasy food, the one he's been craving for so long.

Besides, he oughta' take Cas out on a date too.

Ever since they ended up drunk in bed one long, fateful night ago, things have been slightly different between the two of them. For starters, they smile at each other a lot. Even when they're not looking at each other in tandem. They always end up on the same side of the couch or the dining table, thighs pressed together, hands brushing. They argue a lot, over the most mundane things, like washing the dishes or doing the laundry, but sometimes, after a hunt, when Dean is gushing blood, there will be this one broken glint in Castiel's eyes when he tries to heal him. And that night, they'll make slow, gentle love in Dean's car, away from the rest of the world.

However, there's a slight catch.

Sam doesn't know. He knows nothing. At least Dean hopes so.

And hey, not like they're trying to hide stuff from Sam, 'cause come on, they're practically breathing up each other's neck with only the three of them in the bunker, but it's just that Dean has a specific plan in his mind.

A plan about coming out to his brother. And it'll be heartfelt, of course, 'cause this is not just him establishing his relationship with Castiel, but also him coming out as bisexual. Sure, forty's a little late to figure out your sexuality, but better late than never, yeah?

So that's how it goes.

Maybe they can have a nice, brotherly chat over beer and chilli poppers.

"So, here we are. At last," Castiel says, as they stand against the Impala, all three of them, studying the creaky wooden sign which reads: Donny's Diner– home to the famous Habanero Chilli Poppers.

Okay. They're at the right place then.

"Habanero? Is that like, hotter than jalapeños or somethin'?"

Dean asks, as he stuffs his hands into the pocket of his jacket, and glances at his brother.

"I don't know," Sam says, so Dean turns to Cas, who almost passes as a rugged, buff lumberjack with the way Dean's flannel and AC/DC shirt hug his chest. He has his arms folded across him, a thoughtful gleam in his eyes as he studies the diner.

"I was too busy leading armies in Heaven to really pay attention to the chillies on earth."

"God," Dean sighs, exasperated, "-just say no."

Castiel's lips twitch in the slightest of amusement, and Dean hates the smug look spread across Castiel's face.

Okay, fine, he loves it.

Whatever.

"Let's go eat some fucking chilli poppers," Sam sighs, and Dean, ever ready, follows behind him. Castiel joins them, and all three men enter the diner, which in truth, is a normal, rustic style place. The tables are wooden, the chairs quite simple, a single order station at the front, and a few women, dressed in black shirts and jeans, running around with trays in their hands. It seems casual and laid-back, just the way Dean likes a diner to be, and at once, he quirks his bottom lip, already impressed by the minimal decor and the light chatter in the diner.

"Hi!"

Both Cas and Dean jump a little at the loud, enthusiastic, squeaky voice from in front of them, and standing before them is a young, short woman, with a pixie cut and cute, black-rimmed glasses on her nose. She reminds Dean of a high schooler. Maybe she is.

"Erm, hey."

"I'm Dana, and I'll be your server today. Follow me please, I'll grab you guys a seat."

Dean smiles at her, and the trio follows her along to a booth at the corner of the room. Sam slides in one side, while Castiel and Dean slip in across him. Dana allows them to settle for a moment before piping up again. Seriously this girl has got some real hard enthusiasm for a waitress.

"So, do you guys have anything in mind already? Since a lot of people come in here for the poppers, but if you want, I can get you the menu."

Dean shares a look with Sam. Dean shares a look with Cas.

We'll have the poppers. Oh, and uh, Dana, are the poppers uh, spicy? Like, reeealll spicy? Or spicy spicy?"

Dana chuckles, and shrugs.

"On a scale of one to ten, I'd say a solid eight. But you don't need to try them if you don't want to. We have normal jalapeño poppers. Those aren't as spicy."

"We'll have the really spicy ones, since Dean has been so insistent about them," Castiel says, and the waitress nods. He turns to Dean with a challenging spark in his eyes, "-or are you scared, Dean? I mean, you haven't been known to be quite tolerant towards chillies."

"Shaddup," Dean grumbles, and watches as Sam sends him a silly look, before turning to the waitress.

"The habanero poppers, please."

Sam smiles, and the waitress walks away with a brief nod.

Dean turns back to Sam, who fixes him a dry glare, before turning to Cas.

"Alright, I'm gonna' go use the restroom for a minute," He says, and glances at Dean, after which he proceeds to slide out of the booth and walk away.

Alone at last.

Dean shifts his weight onto a single thigh and turns in his seat to face Castiel. Castiel looks at him with a soft, tender expression, before reaching out to twine their fingers together.

"Are you happy, Dean?"

"'Course I am, Cas. Are you?"

"With you I always am."

"Sap."

"I prefer the term honest."

A smile spreads across both of their faces, before Dean leans in, and presses his lips to Castiel's, who melts at once, giving in to Dean, hands grazing Dean's jaw as they kiss, tender, longing, passionate, hot... Okay too hot, abort, abort.

Dean clears his throat and backs away, glancing around the diner to find a few curious pair of eyes on them, and he sends each one a glare, linking his arm around Castiel's back to show them what's theirs. Castiel shakes bis head with a hopeless smile, and steals a peck off Dean's lips, just in time, since Sam returns not a moment later.

Dean jerks his hand away. Castiel seems a bit hurt.

"So, what'd I miss?"

"Nothing," Castiel scoffs, and looks away, setting his chin on his fists on the table.

Sam looks between Dean and Castiel, and as much as Dean hates the way Sam is suspicious, he doesn't say much.

Patience, Sammy, patience. Dean's going to come out soon. He promises. Or something.

Dana returns just in time to soothe the rising tension at the table, and at once, the prominent scent of spices, oil, and chilli wafts around them, tickling Dean's nostrils in the best of ways, and he follows his nose to find a steaming, hot plate of sizzling habanero poppers held in Dana's hand. There's almost eight to nine poppers on the plate, and each one looks downright delectable.

"Alright, I would advise you to grab yourself some water, because these can be very spicy, and we don't want another paramedic in this diner."

"You have a paramedic in this diner?"

Dean asks, incredulous as he stares at the plate of poppers.

Dana laughs. "Uh-huh, over there, that's Kenny, he's the medic."

"Woah."

Castiel sighs, and watches as the waitress sets the tray down before them.

"Anything else I can get you? Besides a huge jug of water?"

Dana smirks, and all three men gulp at once, eyes fixed to the plate of poppers.

Man up, Winchester.

"Nothing, honey."

Dean smiles, and Dana returns it before walking away.

Now.

The poppers.

Before Dean can even speak, both Sam and Castiel are swiping their hands at one, holding it up and staring down at it.

"Guys, I don't think that's it's a good idea to–"

Gone. The poppers are gone. The ones in Sam's and Castiel's hand? Gone. In their mouths.

Dean stares, wide eyed, awestruck, torn between looking at Sam and Castiel, but then–

"Oh my god," Castiel gasps, mouth stuffed full, chewing on the popper, and Dean watches as his fists clench on the table.

Yup. Dean is not touching those poppers with a ten-foot pole.

"Jesus," Sam mutters, and holy shit, the guy's actually red, and fuck, so is Cas, they're literally burning red at the cheeks and the nose, and Sam's drooling, wiping his nose, there's tears at his eyes, Castiel is swatting the table, groaning, tears streaming down his face as he chews on the popper–

This is a fuckfest.

"Dude, what's happening?"

Dean yelps, shrinking away from his brother and boyfriend, as they pant, gasp and cry.

"Hot, hot, hot– too hot," Sam cries out, and Dean almost feels bad for the bugger. Serves them for being impatient.

"Dean, oh my god, argh, hot, hot, this is the hottest thing I've ever put in my mouth?!"

Castiel screams out, banging his fist on the table, and yes, Dean knows the time isn't right, but obviously Castiel has had hotter things in his mouth before, and those things are sitting right next to him, so how dare he.

"Excuse me?" Dean scoffs, to which Castiel sends him a dry, enraged glare.

"Food, Dean! Food."

Castiel squawks, and slaps the table, but a loud, deafening yelp catches both of their attention.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?!"

Sam bellows, and oh. Oops.

"I don't wanna' listen to you talk about your sex life when I'm literally dying?! Dean, what the fuck are you sitting for, ask for some water?!"

Wow. This Sam is... Not nice.

Dean falters, trapped between two impatient, burning, overreacting men, and he rises up from his seat, watching as Dana scurries towards them with a water jug, but she doesn't even have a moment to react before Castiel is snatching it out of her hands and oh, oh god.

Castiel holds the jug above his face, and Dean jumps away from the table as the water gushes out, pouring into his mouth, over his shirt, everywhere, and before Castiel can even quench his thirst, Sam is grabbing the jug, pouring it over his face just like Castiel, the water drizzling every where, and a horrified, stricken Dean simply glances up at Dana, who seems... Strangely calm.

"Oh, it's more common than you think. I'm used to it," She says, and Dean wonders vaguely, if they're paying her enough for this, before providing help in the most menial form ever, by tossing his handkerchief to Castiel.

"You, Dean, are not getting away with this. You're the reason we almost died?!"

He growls, and yanks Dean onto the chair.

"Dude, I didn't ask you to pop it into your mouth literally a second after it came out."

Dean yells, shrugging away in defense, when a loud gasp draws their attention to Sam.

"You guys are fucking each other?"

Oh. Uhm. Cat's out.

"Yes, we're fucking each other, Sam, now could you pass that jug over here?"

Dean stares at the two of them, completely normal, going about passing the between the two of them.

That was... Not how he planned on coming out. Nope.

"Yeah, uh, Sam, Cas and I are dating. And uhm, I'm bi."

Sam shrugs, and holds the jug above his face, when it seems to click him.

"Wait. Was I not supposed to know that?"

Dean rolls his eyes.

"No, you weren't. How'd you know?"

Sam laughs.

"I don't know, maybe the oh my god, faster Dean, or the oh, you feel so good, coming from your room each night might have something do with it."

Dean blushes. Hard. Too hard. Castiel doesn't seem the slightest bit bothered. I mean, well, save for the water he's practically guzzling down.

"Whatever."

Dean grunts, and slides back in next to Castiel, who pushes the jug away, and slumps back against the booth.

Silence follows both Sam and Castiel's heavy pants.

Only for Castiel to grin again.

"That was awesome, I'm trying another."

[camboy-parker]

Camboy!PeterxDaddy!Tony

if you couldn’t tell, i love this

it’s sloppily written and garbage.

CW: inc*st, pure smut, face f*cking, gagging, peter cant breathe, literally. i’m sorry Degradation. Like really degreasing i’m so sorry don’t read this wtf

——————

Tony would know it was him right off the bat. A lonely night, looking through videos and just genuinely not being able to get off

but then he sees the camboys and he’s always enjoyed it, how sweet and subby they act to get as much attention as possible.

in one of the thumbnails he sees a freckle, literally sees a freckle that he knows is on Peters body in the exact same spot. and he’s like “well i can’t watch this.” but then he clicks on it cause he’s curious.

and yep, that’s his baby

peters live, a few rooms away and he’s whispering so tony doesn’t hear him and he hears it come out of the boys mouth, he calls a user who tipped him 50 bucks daddy.

“I’ve already told you all i don’t need the money, but thank you daddy.”

Tony’s face goes fuckin red.

his baby boy, sitting on his knees, talking to some lowlife who tipped him 50 dollars.

tony wastes no time making an account and putting his credit card in. he joins the chat and sends peter 1500 dollars

and peter just pauses. like he knows.

Tony thinks he’s been found out, thinks that peter knows it’s him.

“Oh my goodness, what a generous daddy, I really don’t deserve that.”

and tony types in the chat, “You’re right, you don’t deserve, especially since you’re being a little whore baby.”

Peter flushes bright red, and he’s absolutely fucking speechless.

“I don’t, wha- i’m, fuck.” he whispers realizing he got too loud. Tony can’t see his face but he knows the look, the absolutely dumbfounded look that’s on Peters face, it’s the same one he gets when he doesn’t understand what Tony’s doing in the lab.

Tony’s typing out another message but he stops, and stands up. He knows what he’s gonna do, and it’s in a lust filled haze that he gets up and makes his way out of the room and down the hall to where Peter is. He knocks on the door, “Peter, baby, can I come in?”

Peter fucking panics slamming his laptop shut and looking for something to put on immediately. He’s putting away every toy he has out and trying to make it look like he was just doing homework,

trying to make it look like he wasn’t about to fuck himself stupid in front of 200, people.

Peter cracks the door after a few looking up at Tony, “Yes daddy?” he asks quietly, now dressed in one of Tony’s science shirts and his boxers.

“Hey Petey, How was school today, i didn’t get to see you much after, i was holed up in the lab, you know.”

Peters face is flushed red and Tony knows he panicking and he doesn’t want to keep him in panic mode for long but it’s so fucking cute. He can tell Peter is still hard from the fact he won’t show tony the bottom half of his body.

He’s shifting on his feet, “It was good! you know! quizzes and tests and stuff, passed everything with at least an A. “

“Yeah, Really? Wow that’s great.”

“Say, do you have 1500 dollars I could borrow?” he asked with a smirk.

Peters eyes go wide and he’s as pale as a ghost, “That’s not possibly, i doxxed your phone, your computer, everything from that site.”

“Baby, you didn’t think that I caught that and fixed it a while ago? Didn’t seem like a big issue at first, but now I see why. Slutting around, calling other men Daddy?”

Peters backing away from the door slowly and looking down at his feet.

“Look at me now baby boy.” Tony tells him.

Peters head snaps up and he looks so beautiful, still so horny and desperate, like he could hump his cock against anything.

“You should know better, you don’t even need the money, daddy gives you everything you want. Everything you could possible need.”

Peter is stumbling over words, trying to find something, anything to say to his Dad to make it better.

“Or is it the attention? You just like knowing that men will throw money at you while they watch you fuck yourself open, the way daddy should be.”

“Yeah, that definitely is it isn’t it whore.” His fingers are in Peters hair pulling the boys head back to expose his neck.

Peters still stumbling over his words looking up at Tony.

“Spit it out you fucking slut, you think I have all day to listen to you try to get out a sentence? “

Peters getting harder as he’s pulled towards his bed.

“Maybe if you weren’t too busy calling other men daddy like a whore you could figure out something to say.”

“Here’s what’s gonna happen baby, you’re gonna suck my cock, just like I know you suck on all those toys. I know you love it so much. Then i’m gonna cum in your mouth and watch you drink all of it.”

Peters so flustered he doesn’t even realize he’s dropping onto his knees, mouth already open for Tony’s cock.

“Please daddy.”

“Do you beg for their cocks too you little slut? Finger yourself while imagining some man who can only throw 50 dollars at you fucking you?” Tony scoffs and undoes his belt pulling it off. His pants are undone and his cock out out, ready to shove down Peters throat to shut the stupid slut up.

“No daddy, i don’t imagine them I imagine-“

Peters cut off by Tony’s cock being pushed down his throat.

“Shut the fuck up *Whore.*”

“Daddy.”

“Don’t give me that now, whoring yourself out for a little bit of money? Daddy gave you some and you couldn’t speak, it’s like you were ready to fuck yourself stupid just because someone gave you money.”

Peters sputtering around Tony’s cock, eyes wide and gagging almost immediately as the man begins face fucking him.

“This is what you get slut, you wanna get treated like a whore? Daddy’s gonna treat you like a whore and give you exactly what you deserve.”

Peter moans around his length and Tony grabs the back of his bed pushing Peters nose to his stomach. Peter gags, drool shooting out from around Tony’s cock.

Peter can barely suck a breath in around his Daddy’s thick cock and tears are streaming his face. He tries to be a good boy though, keeping his hands in his lap.

Peters almost sure he’s gonna pass out. He can’t breathe and his daddy isn’t showing any signs of stopping, holding onto the back of the boys head, fucking into his precious little throat.

“Nice and tight for daddy hmm?? M gonna come down your throat sweetheart. Daddy’s gonna feed you baby, I know you’re so cock hungry, so maybe this will do the trick.”

Peter feels it shooting down the back of his throat and Tony is holding him still as he empty’s inside his son, “Good slut, such a good slut.”

Tony doesn’t let him of until he swallows, and a few moments later, Peters pulling off gasping for air, chest heaving and a mix of cum and drool dripping down his chin.

“Thank you daddy.” he finally chokes out, “I’m sorry.”

“Hopefully you learned your lesson.”

Peter turns around almost screaming when he sees his laptop, partially open, the red light on the external webcam still blinking.

[iwontstayhidden]

Inadequate.

Summary: After Putting Others First, Logan believes that the other sides have wanted him out of the picture all along. Fortunately, Virgil, Patton, and Roman help him to see how much he is truly appreciated. [We’re gonna address all of the insecure!Logan stuff that's been building up and validate him with Platonic LAMP and wholesome talks.]

Read on Ao3

______________________________________________________________________

Not that any of you care, but I am unharmed, and I don’t want to talk about it. I’m just here to deliver one last fact, and then I will do you all a favor and spare you my company.”

Logan sank out with a heavy sigh. His intentions were to return to some new research on an unusual stellar explosion, but he found himself distracted by recent events with Thomas and the sides. Logan thought that by reducing his physical presence to a text bubble for the latest episode, he would decrease the likelihood of the others becoming irritated with him. But this did not seem to be the case at all, based on the evidence mounting in Logan’s mind. Roman said that he “very much did not succeed” in being less invasive. Patton expressed gratitude that Logan’s factoids (an inaccurate term that set Logan even more on edge) were optional this time. Had they always been so vexed by Logan’s facts? And as his function in the group was to provide logic, did this further imply that they are always aggravated by Logan himself? By his mere presence?

Logan found himself pacing back and forth, an activity he usually deemed futile after seeing Virgil work himself up while pacing countless times. But the more he allowed himself to review previous interactions, the more he became sure of this pattern of detestation. And the worst part was that each of the sides had generously attempted to inform Logan that they did not want to hear from him; did not require his assistance! But he was so caught up in his facts. In sharing everything he knew with those he considered to be his companions. Perhaps he had been mistaken in thinking that their feelings for him were affectionate. This certainly wouldn’t be the first time Logan was fooled by the complexity of human emotion and relationships. His friends had been clear all along…

                          “Logan? Shut your ever-flapping gobtalker.”

                                    “Oh hush, sub-astute teacher.”

                                       “Not a good time, Logan...”

                                    “Oh shut up , nerdy Wolverine.”

                             “I’m afraid this is a benched trial for you.”

Logan felt himself losing physical and mental control as these memories grew louder and more insistent. He backed up, feeling vaguely dizzy, and registered that he hit the edge of his bed.

Simultaneously, there was a knock on the door. “Logan, are you in there?” Virgil. Logan sighed, which sounded like a loud gasp for air. Perhaps Virgil might be useful in this moment, at least for temporarily grounding him and decreasing this budding anxiety. “Yes, you may enter, Virgil.” Logan thought that his response sounded quite normal, a decent cover-up for his current state of mind. He was proven wrong immediately upon Virgil’s entrance. “Are they still- woah dude, what’s up? You look like me at 2am” Logan swallowed, which felt considerably more difficult than it should, considering humans swallow saliva an average of 500 to 700 ti-

Virgil interrupted Logan’s racing thoughts. “Okay, I can basically hear you thinking, and it’s making me anxious. What the hell happened up there? I leave you guys alone for one freaking episode and you come back looking like you’re about to put me out of a job. Who do I need to punch?” Logan offered a weak smile, and Virgil raised an eyebrow. “I am- I’ve discovered- I am experiencing some...unpleasant thoughts which appear to have induced some level of physicalized anxiety” Logan rushed out, looking away. A pause. Now you’ve done it, Logan. You’re the embodiment of logic, this display of emotions is unfitting! Virgil is going to be just as baffled as you are, and he won’t fix it because he thinks you’re a freak. Let him leave now so you can continue to reflect upon how useless you’ve been to Thomas and the others.

“Logan, hey. Can you hear me? You don’t have to look, that’s okay. Can you feel what you’re sitting on right now?” Logan closed his eyes. “Th-this feels like the floor? But I wasn’t- I wasn’t here a minute ago…” Logan flushed, frustrated by his stuttering and rapid heart rate. “Yeah, you slipped down there a minute ago. L, I don’t want to freak you out but it seems like you’re having a minor panic attack. Luckily, you’ve stumbled upon the expert. Heh. Cause I’m...ok, nope, wrong time for dark humor…” Logan willed himself to glance up at Virgil and started laughing in spite of himself. Virgil joined in after a minute of half-hearted glaring. “Okay, deflections unfortunately don’t work in the long-term. It uh, usually helps me to do some deep breathing if you wanna try that?” Logan nodded, guilt tugging at him for making Virgil deal with this.

Afterwards, Logan did feel more in control, at least in a physical sense (he should have thought of that, he knows how to address a panic attack, why couldn’t he just think-) “Thank you for your assistance with this...minor anxiety attack, Virgil. I do feel badly that you had to witness and address it, but I appreciate it nonetheless. I’ll be fine from here since you wish to leave.”

Logan looked up again as he heard Virgil scoff loudly. “What the hell gave you the idea that I want to leave? Did you leave your self-esteem upstairs, pocket protector?” Logan’s breath caught in his throat. “It would be impossible to ‘leave my self-esteem upstairs’, as self-esteem is not a physical entity-” he started. Virgil held up a hand, cutting Logan off. Shouldn’t you be used to getting cut off by now Logan? He wants you to shut up! “I really don’t get why you STILL take everything I say so literally. Seriously though, what’s going on? Do I need to get Patton in here?” “NO!” Logan yelled, wincing at his voice. Virgil raised an eyebrow and left without another word. Logan sighed. Having Virgil’s company to ground him in both a literal and figurative sense had been comforting, but it also made everything more painful. Logan realized more than ever how much he would truly miss Virgil’s presence when he finally ducked out, how much he genuinely enjoyed being around the other sides…

“Heyyy there kiddo...Virgil told me that you’re kinda off right now so I wanted to check in! This isn’t about earlier, is it? You know that we care about you!!” Logan willed himself to avoid snapping at Patton, but he didn’t want to risk being vulnerable in front of another side. “Don’t worry about me, Patton, I have simply realized belatedly that I am-” Logan swallowed, looking everywhere but at Patton“-undesirable as a friend and a side of Thomas’.” Logan finally looked up, and saw what he could only describe as pity reflected on Patton’s face. Don’t be melodramatic, Logan. Just explain that you finally recognize your inadequacy and share your intentions to duck out.

“You can’t really think that, LoLo-” Patton started, at the same time that Logan said “I have realized-” Patton opened and closed his mouth a few times before nodding at Logan to continue. “Thank you for allowing me to finish, it’s greatly appreciated. I have realized that my knowledge is disagreeable to you all, and as that is both my primary function and my singular skill, it would be best that I...duck out.” Logan finished, looking up to see Patton’s eyes fill with tears as Virgil and Roman burst into the room, practically falling over each other.

"NOT SO FAST, MICROSOFT NERD" Roman bellowed. "I don’t know where you got such a ridiculous idea, but we certainly don’t want you gone!” Logan adjusted his glasses, uncomfortable. He should have expected this sort of protestation from the others, despite his accurate statements. It is unlikely that the other sides would acknowledge their true feelings about Logan to his face.

“Falsehood. Perhaps you hadn’t specifically considered my ducking out, but I am not daft, Roman. I have noticed your eye rolls and reactions to my presence. I apologize for not arriving at this conclusion sooner.” At this, Logan’s voice cracked slightly. Patton’s eyes widened. “Oh Logan, that’s not true!! Roman and you may have your little arguments here and there but it’s mostly in good fun, right Roman? We totally value all the cool stuff you bring up!” Roman nodded, eyes fixed on Logan as if he didn’t recognize the side behind his insecurities. Logan took a shaky breath, trying to count to four silently. But it was not in his nature to allow false information go without a debate. The voices in his head were pounding, growing louder and more furious, more wild, more hurt. Logan glanced up and met Virgil’s worried stare, Patton’s bewilderment, and Roman’s passionate fury.

“Falsehood, again. As I stated, it took me far too long to recognize that I am….unwanted. But I will not be lied to now in some attempt to spare my feelings...”

“Lo, we are not lying when we say we car-”

                                                      “ENOUGH!!!!”

Logan began pacing again, hands switching between combing through his hair and flailing frantically. “I have compiled specific memories of each one of you asking me to shut up, to exit conversations...for example: just today Roman, you told me that I did NOT succeed in being less invasive, and quite literally slashed my words in half, which Patton thanked you for because you had ‘cut the tension’. Patton, you just said you ‘value all the cool stuff I bring up’, but earlier appeared quite relieved that I had made my presence and voice optional, which you took advantage of by hitting my ‘skip all’ button! I am not useful in providing logic, I am...not useful as a friend seeing as I can’t read social cues or provide joy, s-so….” Logan closed his eyes as he felt tears slide down his cheeks. The barrier had broken. He tried pushing past the others to leave, but a pair of strong arms wrapped around him.

“Logan, I...apologize for what I said earlier. And for anything in the past that has made you uncomfortable. We may have our moments not seeing eye to eye, but at the end of the day you keep me, and all of us in check. You balance us out! And that- meaning YOU- is something we could never live without, you nerd. I’ll admit we have all hit some rough patches recently. Even I, your dashing prince, have been dealing with some...insecurities. So perhaps we have been harsh, and haven’t made enough room to appreciate each other. Especially to appreciate you, Logan. You are...truly amazing.” Logan looked up to see what he could only classify as genuine care and sincerity reflected in Roman’s eyes.

Patton moved to sit beside Logan and Roman, resting his head on Logan’s shoulder. He spoke after a moment, voice wobbly and eyes bright. “Roman is 1000% right, LoLo! And I am so sorry that I didn’t realize you weren’t feeling needed sooner. That is a horrible feeling...But you know what? You are a fantastic friend.” Logan interrupted, “Earlier you said that one can’t learn to care for others from a book, Patton. You were correct-” Patton shook his head, taking Logan’s hand and squeezing it once. Logan...did not hate it. “I shouldn’t have said that. But I did mean it when I said you’re a fantastic friend. You didn’t learn that from a book, Logan. You learned it from being with all of us! You show us you care in all those fun little ways that just scream ‘Logan!!’ And we absolutely love that! And we love you, exactly as you are. You aren’t giving yourself enough credit.” At that, Logan finally smiled.

Patton shot a pointed look at Virgil, who was still standing nearby. “Oh come on, I thought we agreed that my compliments are unspoken??” Several pointed looks. “Fine. Listen...I know where you’re coming from. I don’t think anyone is surprised to hear that I’ve gone through the whole ‘should I be here’ thing on basically a daily basis. But I don’t think Thomas, or these weirdos, or I could function without you. And yeah, you’re not mushy or affectionate in your friendship, which I actually relate to and appreciate because Patton’s hugs are already overwhelming enough-” “VIRGIL-” “-anyway, you show us that you care in other ways. And the fact that we’re saying we couldn’t do this without you means that you are a good friend. We just all show it in different ways.”

Logan stood up, wiping his tears quickly as he approached Virgil. They tried some combination of a hug, back pat, and hand shake before simultaneously deciding on finger guns. Patton started laughing, and they all joined in as Roman yelled “You absolute NERDS” fondly. “Do you believe us, Logan?” Patton asked after they quieted down. “I have reason to believe that these types of things take time to work through, but yes, I do find your words to be genuine and...moving. Thank you all, from the bottom of the heart that I apparently do have.” They all smiled at that, making no comment about the light blush that tinted Logan’s features.

The rest of the night was filled with BBC’s Sherlock, trivia games, and laughter. Once the others had gone their separate ways, even Janus and Remus made an appearance, and Logan found that their chaos was surprisingly comforting. He’d have to unpack that more later. For the moment, he felt content, knowing that while he still had much to learn of emotions and friendship, he actually knew a bit more than he thought. And that was adequate (at least for now).

[emeraldbabygirl]

Competition Part 2

Genre: smut

Warnings/Kink(s): shower sex, baby boy yoonho

Series: part 2

Here’s the link to part 1

You had just had a long day filled with stress and you wanted to enjoy a nice shower when you got home. You were about to turn the water off when you heard a noise. You opened the shower door a little and listened again. You heard footsteps coming closer to the bathroom.

“Babe, where are you?” Yoonho called from the bedroom. Yoonho must’ve just got home. You smiled as he was always so clingy and always asked where you were when he got home.

“I’m in the shower, what’s wrong.” you heard the bathroom door open and saw Yoonho’s figure through the shower door. Yoonho stepped closer trying to see you through the door.  “You’re in the shower?” Yoonho asked, a tint of excitement in his voice. “Yes Yoonho. I’ve had a stressful day and I just want to relax-” you were cut off by the Yoonho opening the shower door. Fully clothed Yoonho starred at your wet, naked flesh. Under normal circumstances your were totally alright with Yoonho seeing you naked but when he surprised you like this you felt a bit embarrassed. You quickly covered you breasts and pussy with your hands, your face turning a light pink. 

Yoonho chuckled. “Baby, are you shy? Why. I see you naked all the time.” You looked down at his feet for awhile before speaking. “Yes, but usually we’re both naked, and you’ve never walked in on me in the shower before. Yoonho stayed silent for a bit and then began taking his clothes off. “Anyway, um..I was wondering if we could try shower sex?” Yoonho wasn’t usually this blunt with you so you both stood there naked in the bathroom with no noise but the water running. You were shocked. You didn’t think shower sex was Yoonho’s thing. However you had noticed he was getting more brave and adventurous in the bedroom and that made you proud and excited. You stepped aside so Yoonho could join you. Closing the door he turned to you grabbing your hands and holding them at your sides. He smiled. “You’re even more beautiful like this baby.” 

“Hyung always says how amazing shower sex is so I thought we could try it. It’s funny because every time he texts me saying he just finished with his girl it’s always on the same day you go out. Hey,” Yoonho chuckled. “You’re not cheating on me with Hosung hyung are you? I’m not mad, I think it’s kind of hot. I get to share the same cum bucket as hyung.” You blushed at Yoonho’s choice of words. He was becoming more and more confident. A million thoughts were going through your mind right now. His voice was so calm about it almost like the thought made him sad, was your boyfriend attracted to Lou? You didn’t have the heart to tell him that you were in fact fucking Lou on the side. But it seemed like ever since these two got into competition your sex life with Ayno was finally getting more interesting. You were afraid that if you told him he would be upset and not only would you lose him but Lou would for sure leave you.

Yoonho began leaving kisses up and down your neck. He moved down to suck the wet skin right above your breasts your face turning a darker shade of pink. He moved back up and pulled you into him, him lips meeting yours, his dick laying against your stomach. His hands roamed your body, gripping your ass, finding your breasts, teasing your nipples and running his fingers along your slit. Slowly inserting his digits deep into your cavern. You broke the kiss gasping as you gripped his chest lowering your head against him. “Yoonho, harder.” you whispered. Yoonho chuckled doing what you wanted, his fingers began assaulting your walls, curling to find your g-spot. You leaned against him, each thrust causing you to moan louder. “Fuck, you sound so sexy baby.” He kept going, your juices lubing up your cunt making it easier for Yoonho to slide his fingers in and out. The lewd sounds only causing you to approach your orgasm faster. “Fuck..” you moaned in between thrusts. You were close but you couldn’t gather your words quick enough at the speed Yoonho was pumping. “Fuck me!” you cried out cumming all over Yoonho’s fingers. You legs shook as you tried to hold yourself up. Yoonho held you against him, pulling his finger out of you and bringing them up to your lips. 

You were in the middle of licking them clean when Yoonho grunted pulling them out of your mouth and pushed your back against the shower wall. Under the water Yoonho aggressively sucked your skin. Your neck, your lips. your ear lobes, your collarbone and nipples. He slowly dropped to his knees, gripping your ass and kissing up your thighs meeting your lower lips. His tongue licked along your folds, his nose coming into contact with your clit. You arched your back grabbing Yoonho’s hair and held his head against your pussy. His tongue lapped up your juices and he continued to eat you out. His hands spread your legs apart and his fingers entered your pussy again. Gently teasing you with his fingers while aggressively lapping you up with his tongue. You whined bucking your hips into Yoonho’s face, gripping his hair with your fingers. You pulled him away from you seeing his lips and the tip of his nose shining with drops of your sweet essence you moaned. “Fuck me Yoonho.” you demanded. You wanted to see him take you in the shower. You wanted to compare him with Lou. You needed Yoonho to fuck you better than Lou.

Yoonho stood up grinning and picked you up. You wrapped your legs around his waist and slid down on his now fully erect cock. Yoonho pushed your body against another shower wall and thrusted into you. He made eye contact with your breasts as they bounced up and down. He grinned opening his mouth to suck on one of your nipples. You arched your back gripping his shoulders, your nails digging into his skin. “Yes baby.” you moaned, enjoying the angle and feeling of his cock stretching your walls.

After you came the second time Yoonho slid you off his cock and set you down making sure that you could hold yourself up on your own. He went back to kissing your lips, softly while holding you against him. Then Yoonho grabbed one of your legs and lifted it up to rest on his arm. He rammed his still erect cock back into you and fucked you for a third time. You held on to Yoonho’s arms and closed your eyes enjoying the movement of his cock thrusting fast in and out of you. You felt your third orgasm coming quickly and you wondered if you could hold yourself up on just one leg long enough for Yoonho to cum in you.  “Yoonho I-”

“It’s alright baby you can cum whenever you’re ready.” Your legs were shaking tremendously as your orgasm was so close. “My- Yoonho my legs.” you finally said through shallow breaths. Yoonho could feel your leg tremble as well as your cunt clamp around his cock. He let out a soft whine. “Oh fuck. Baby you’re gonna make me cum.” He said, his thrust slowing down. You whined loudly, your legs shaking, your toes on the foot that was in the air curling. “Cum with me Yoonho, please. Hurry and cum.” Yoonho’s breathing got heavy as he thrusted a few more times into you then pushed his cock balls deep into your cunt and released his seed into you. Your orgasm hit immediately after, your cunt having a vice grip on Yoonho’s cock, your arms wrapped around his neck and you mumbled incoherent words into his ear. Yoonho held you against the shower wall until you came down from your high. He slowly pulled out of you, a mix of both of your cum dripping out of your pussy and down your legs, he set your other legs back down on the shower floor and held you there a little longer til your breathing steadied and you could stand on your own. Your eyes were still a bit hazy but you reacted to his hand cupping the side of your face looking at you with nothing but love.

“You did good princess. I love you.” Yoonho kissed you once more. Having previously only called you ‘baby’ you blushed at his new nickname for you. You smiled as he pulled away from your lips. “We should probably clean up.” Yoonho stated lathering up a bar of soap. Coming out of the shower Yoonho wrapped a towel around his waist and another one around your body. Grabbing a third towel he put it over your head and began drying your hair. He lifted the towel up a bit and leaned down to peck your lips causing you to giggle. “I love you princess.” he whispered just loud enough that you could hear. “I love you too daddy.” you whispered back.

Sorry that it was rushed towards the end, I’ve been working on this part for weeks and I’m rushing to get these fics out. I still have more parts for this series and I have more works in my drafts. I’m slowly getting them done so please be patient if you want to see more from me. Also, if anyone knows how to make a masterlist, I think I might need one so I’d love some info on how to make one.

Also also, I’d just like to say a big ol fuck you to the two bitches who made fun of my last smut. Not only did you embarrass me but you also discouraged me because as someone who’s just started writing smut, I know it’s not going to be good at first so when you basically laugh at me from 72 angles that really made me want to stop writing, not just smut but any fanfics all together. Also one of you really made fun of me because it was a cockwarming smut yet plenty of other people write cockwarming smuts. Plus your username is literally “this person’s” cockwarmer. And unless your blog is completely normal don’t make fun of my entire blog based off the one smut you found of mine. 

With that finally being off my chest I’d also like to say thank you everyone whose read and liked my works. I didn’t expect people to like them but I’m glad that they are getting some love. I’m happy knowing that I’m not the only hoe on this site that’s whipped af for VAV lmao. I’m working on fanfics for other groups so it’s not just VAV, even tho y’all love my VAV posts but sometimes my thot brain needs a break from the only men that can make this bussy throb with excitement so the only VAV works I have planned are a Lou smut, a St.Van smut, part 2 of a failed horror fanfic and the rest of this series. Everything else is other groups. I hope you guys will enjoy those as well.

[anotherdarkiboi]

Warnings: blood, eye horror, medical themes, bandages, blindfold, mild cursing, mild nudity, innuendo and sexual references, references to murder.

Dr. Iplier changed out of his mildly bloody medical scrub shirt and formerly-white lab coat, discarding them onto the floor. His mind has been wandering lately. One of his regular patients seemed to occupy himself in his brain like a cancerous tumor or Taenia solium larvae might. He was frequently distracted and excitable, getting flustered uncharacteristically easily. That and the overall warmth he felt coursing through his body and the achey tightness in his chest concerned him to no end.

What's worse was that the doctor couldn't diagnose exactly what sickness he had. Dr. Iplier knew they could be signs of a heart attack or about a hundred other maladies that could possibly kill him, but he didn't dare imagine the possibility that he was the one who was dying, as painfully ironic that would be.

He wanted to get rid of it, and soon. It was impeding on his work and the credibility of his profession, to the dismay of his business partner, fellow doctor, and best friend, Schneep. Dr. Iplier accidentally dropped a scalpel into Peter during his surgery and caused a bloody mess (literally) because of it. Poor Peter didn't make it. But then again, that's what you got when you ran a medical practice with Henrik von Schneeplestein (the "Doctor" part was debatable): Peter never stood a chance.

But as time progressed, Dr. Iplier found that whatever he had made him feel euphoric. Maybe the disease or parasite released dopamine? He suspected that it had something to do with that patient of his. Maybe they were also the Patient Zero for his ailment? Or were they somehow causing these symptoms through mind control?

The doctor was familiar with the paranormal through his experiences with the infamous Darkiplier, so it wouldn't be too farfetched. He had his suspicions about his patient, but knew that it wasn't really professional of him to comment. Either way, they were forced to interact on a daily basis and Dr. Iplier didn't feel like losing his most loyal customer, so he said nothing of it and ignored the rapid beating of his heart (tachycardia?).

Soon the doctor found himself thinking about his "favorite" patient. Again. Of course. His thoughts always drifted to that quiet, contemplative man. The disease- Illness? Parasite? Whatever it was, the symptoms were getting worse.

Dr. Iplier sighed, picking up his bloody scrubs from the floor. He didn't want to further lower the reputation of his business by leaving his bedroom and private clinic messy.

-----------------------

The Host opened the door to Dr. Iplier's bedroom and makeshift clinic with a faint creek. He considered knocking first, but what he needed to ask the doctor was urgent. Well, maybe not urgent per se, but he had been thinking about it for a while now and had finally come to the conclusion that today was the day he would ask their resident doctor out.

What the Host didn't expect was to find was said doctor shirtless. The Host can't see, not in the physical sense anyway, but he has the ability to narrate his surroundings to get a vague sense of what's going on. So when his internal monologue started describing in excruciating detail exactly how lean Dr. Iplier's exposed upper body looked like and the faintest hint of his V-line peaking over the elastic of his thin blue scrub pants, the Host became overwhelmed. Of course, the Host doesn't say this aloud: for once, his narrations remained in his head in a loud, frantic monotone. The Host couldn't hear himself think, let alone focus from the mental barrage of stimuli. Shit.

-----------------------

Dr. Iplier tosses the bloody clothes into the hamper. He turns around to find the Host, propping himself up by the doorway looking like he was on the verge of collapse.

"Oh! Uh, you're here awfully early... Are you alright?"

"The Host, um, I- fuck."

The doctor's eyes widen in concern. Blood streaked down the Host's bandages like tears. It was rare to see him shocked into using first person and it was usually was damaging to his physical health. And this was the first time Dr. Iplier ever heard the Host stutter.

The Host makes an attempt to step into the room and falters. Dr. Iplier is quickly by the Host's side, holding the trenchcoated man up by the waist to guide him to the bed (which served as both a hospital cot and the doctor's actual bed). The Host sits on the edge while the doctor hangs his stethoscope around his neck, putting on his lab coat and head mirror out of habit: all without noticing that he still wasn't wearing a shirt.

The Host can't help but compare the mental image to the intro of a low-budget porno. He covers his head in his hands and groans in exasperation. Why did Dr. Iplier have to be at the pinnacle of health?

The doctor feels the Host's forehead with gentle tenderness, his cool hand resting against warm skin. He tilts the Host's head up from under his chin, examining how much blood his patient lost. The Host can feel Dr. Iplier's intense stare on him as he attempts to figure out what's wrong. He hopes that the doctor won't notice his face heating up.

The physical contact felt intimate, even though it was practically ritual at this point with the amount of times the Host visits. The Host mentally compares it to heavy petting leading up to eventual smut. He internally screams.

The Host's narrations drift to Dr. Iplier's inner monologue as the doctor checks his vitals. It's something that the Host tries to avoid as it's an invasion of privacy, but it wasn't something he was able to control in his current state. Anything was better than whatever his brain was conjuring right now.

-----------------------

Usually he's calm under pressure, but the doctor can't explain is why he feels irrational, seething anger for whatever caused the Host's predicament. Dark maybe? Or Wilford? Probably someone with a great deal of power for the Host to essentially overload.

The doctor rarely gets angry: Annoyed? All the time. Cranky? Every morning before the caffeine hits. But Dr. Iplier felt, for the first time, homicidal. How dare they? The Host's health is delicate to say the least: the other egos know that. Yet Dr. Iplier is well aware that the blindfolded man can take care of himself. Then why does he feel so protective of him?

He knew, in great detail, at least 50 different ways to kill a person and had the means to do it. Injecting air into the bloodstream and facilitating an air embolism, constricting the windpipe and suffocating them while they sleep, utilizing any number of lethal drugs he had on hand: the list went on. If anyone ever hurt the Host again, he'd have to...

He takes a deep breath. The Host needs a doctor now, not an emotional wreck. The doctor checks off his mental checklist and goes through the familiar motions of proper medical procedure for his patient. It was his job to help people, and he'd be damned if he did just the opposite: at least on purpose (accidents happen).

-----------------------

For some reason, imagining Dr. Iplier attempting to murder the infamous Dark and Wilford duo calms the Host down. The Host had an especially violent streak during his Author days, so he understood the feeling well. But the fact that the doctor would feel so passionately about him was... endearing. Maybe this could still work...

The doctor grabs his glasses from his desk and pushes them up the bridge of his nose. They were rectangular ones reminiscent of Mark's old trademark, which the Host imagined made Dr. Iplier look more distinguished and erudite. He reads off his clipboard with concern.

"Elevated heart rate, irregular breathing, flushed but no fever, dilated pupils... Host, do you know what -or who- caused this?" The Host notices how Dr. Iplier clenches his jaw at "who". How cute.

You. "That doesn't matter, Doctor. I can assure you, I'm fine. I've been experiencing these 'symptoms' for a while now. I know they're not fatal." He casually fails to mention the overload he just had.

"And you didn't bother to tell me? We see each other every day!" Dr. Iplier gasps with a look of genuine horror on his face. "Have you... have you been seeing other doctors?!"

The Host stifles a laugh. "Of course not. Dr. Schneeplestein may be 'zhe good doctah', but you are the best one."

"Oh, I know," Dr. Iplier asserts, the flirtatious remark flying over his large ego. "Trust me, you wouldn't believe how many lawsuits we get every week. It's a wonder how our business stays afloat."

Something that the Host said triggers something in the doctor's mind. He checks his clipboard again. The Host had been experiencing this for a while now, minus the almost collapsing part. And so had he. It can't be... can it? The symptoms were the same as his own.

"I'm sorry, but I think we're both dying."

"...We?"

Dr. Iplier sets down his clipboard and sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. He never liked being the bearer of bad news, but the burden seemed to be part of his job.

"I'm afraid we both have the same illness- same symptoms and everything. Yours is probably later-staged, which would explain the fainting spell. We should warn Dark and the others to quarantine the area or something."

The Host starts laughing, loud and unabashedly. Dr. Iplier looks on in confusion and finds himself unable to speak. This was the first time he saw the Host laugh this much. Creepy sadistic grins? Sure. A wry smile after making a snide remark? Rare, but certainly rewarding. This crazed fit of giggling however? Unheard of until now. The doctor liked seeing the Host happy, even if it was due to the thought of their own deaths. Maybe it was a coping mechanism. He wonders how much time he had left to hear it again.

The Host slowly calms down, wiping the blood dripping down his face as if he was wiping away tears of laughter. It doesn't have the same effect: Dr. Iplier grimaces at the red smear on the back of his patient's hand.

"I assure you, those measures will not be necessary. Tell me Doctor, when do these 'symptoms', as you call them, tend to occur?"

"All the time since a few weeks ago, but it gets worse when you're around: no offense. Is it that Hanahaki disease Yandereiplier was telling me about?"

The Host resists the urge to facepalm. For someone who supposedly went to medical school, Dr. Iplier was surprisingly dumb. He completely went against the stereotype of glasses-wearers being the most intelligent.

"No. What you- we have is not an illness nor disease, at least not in the traditional sense."

"You know what it is then? Is there a cure?" Dr. Iplier replies in all seriousness.

The Host sighs. He still didn't get it. "Doctor, are you familiar with the concept of love?"

"Obviously", Dr. Iplier retorts, his ego kicking in again. The Host sincerely doubts it. "There are tons of books on the subject and Wil talks about it all the time. It's a combination of dopamine, serotonin, and adrenaline."

"In scientific terms, yes. And the physical indications?"

Dr. Iplier thinks for a moment, going down the list. It clicks.

"Oh my god, I love you."

A pause. The doctor starts to realize what he blurted out loud. He covers his face in his hands, not daring to make eye contact (or whatever was closest to that) with the Host/newfound target of affection. He opens his mouth in an attempt to amend his spur of the moment confession until he hears the Host's muttered response:

"...The feeling is mutual".

The two of them are both blushing messes and the silence is impenetrable. Dr. Iplier doesn't know how to respond. What was he supposed to say? How does one typically proceed from here? How does this work?

He breaks the silence with a hastily stammered excuse to grab a damp hand towel and a fresh bandage for the Host's bleeding eye sockets. The doctor gently wipes the blood off the Host's face, dyeing the towel pink.

The Host knew better than to argue about being able to do it himself. "It's my job!" the doctor said every time the Host commented on it, even though he knew it wasn't necessary. Whether it be the simple action of bandaging his face or wiping blood off it, Dr. Iplier was always gentle. The doctor was one of the only ones who knew what happened to the Host: what happened to his eyes, what he had done, who he'd hurt. And still, still Dr. Iplier treated him with curtesy and kindness. But why? It was one of the things about the doctor that the Host found intriguing- captivating even. And to think that Dr. Iplier liked him back...

"You are..." the Host pauses, searching for the right word to say next. Although he's a writer and self proclaimed linguist, he can't find another word that conveys the same emotion and feeling. "Beautiful. The Host wishes that he could see you".

"Host, you don't have to. I'm really not," the doctor asserts with a half-hearted chuckle. He tries to focus on helping his patient instead of the burning sensation on his cheeks. At least the Host was stable enough to phase out of talking in first person.

The Host's head tilts to the side, frowning slightly. "You are the kind of doctor and person that others like the Host need, but not necessarily the one they deserve. The Host understands if this is something you aren't comfortable pursuing yet, or ever."

Dr. Iplier scoffs, setting the now bloodstained towel down. "Hold on, you deserve all the care and support in the world, medical or otherwise. Sure you've done horrible things in the past, but that doesn't make you any less deserving of happiness now."

The doctor gingerly unties the Host's bandage to expose closed eyelids caked with dried blood. "Because you're 'beautiful' too. And this-," Dr. Iplier pauses, taking the Host's hand in both his own. "This is something that I want too. If you'll have me".

"Of course," the Host says with a rare smile. It's sweet and small, but the doctor's heart palpitates anyways. "The Host would even like to ask if you were free for coffee or a beverage of your choice later, if you are interested."

"Are you... asking me out?" The Host was always taken aback at how dumb his doctor sometimes was.

"The Host says yes".

"Neat!" Dr. Iplier exclaims a little too enthusiastically, "Um, I'll be there."

He carefully ties the new bandage over the Host's face. The doctor knew the pristine cloth would only stay white for so long until it got stained red again and his patient would have to return. The Host slides off the bed to face Dr. Iplier.

"The Host would like to thank the doctor for his help and for accepting his proposal. The Host also implores Dr. Iplier to put a shirt on." The Host's gaze (if one could call it that) drifts to the floor to try and avoid having his thoughts veer into dangerous territory again.

That explains why the doctor felt so cold. He tries to ignore the sharp spikes of embarrassment stabbing his insides. You know it's bad when a legally blind man points out your dress code infringement (or lack thereof of said "dress").

"Well that's unprofessional of me. I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable."

"The Host says it's more than fine, just distracting. The Host will leave to let the doctor finish changing."

"Oh."

Dr. Iplier is still unused to all the compliments and to seeing this slightly flirty Host. Not that he was complaining though. He had so many questions and cursed his lack of experience. The Host was halfway out the door when the doctor calls out after him.

"Hey Host, how do you know all this stuff?"

Dr. Iplier knew with 100% certainty that the Host never brought any partners back to the manor (his medical questionnaires tend to be extensive, if not a little insensitive), and he was sure that the Author's experiences didn't really count as the Host's own.

The Host grins mischievously. "You don't know half of the things I write. Maybe I'll show you one day, if you're up to it."

A spot of crimson spreads through the Host's bandages as he shifts into first person. On that note, the Host leaves and the doctor is left with more confusion and a piqued interest.

The doctor grabs a clean shirt, bunching it up and covers his face, groaning. What does the Host write? Where the hell did he get "neat" from? What happened to the less awkward (but not nearly as fulfilling) doctor-patient relationship they used to have?

The doctor finally puts the shirt on and his lab coat over it, falling facedown onto his bed. The headmirror presses uncomfortably against his skull. He didn't know when "later" was for his little date, nor where. Where they going to meet there or were they going together? And holy fuck, what was he going to wear?

-----------------------

Host smiles to himself, walking down the familiar path to his room. For the first time in a long time, he felt content: he finally asked the flustered doctor out, though he didn't expect getting "distracted" or the doctor actually accepting.

He turns a corner to sense some of the other egos crowding the hallway with conniving looks directed towards him. How did they find out so fast? The Host mentally prepares himself for annoyance.

"I hear that someone has been trying to make a move on our good doctor here," Dark announces with a smirk. "I congratulate you Host, I hope the two of find happiness."

Dark sighs wistfully. The others can't tell if he is joking or not when he mutters "they grow up so fast" like a proud parent.

"So~?" Wilford teases in a singsong voice, slinging his arm around the blindfolded man's shoulder and whispers conspiratorially: "didya fuck?"

The others respond with similar curiosity, loudly talking over one another. The Host can sense an imminent migraine at the multiple dialogues and camera panning he has to keep track of. But he appreciates their support nonetheless.

"Can I just establish the fact that I am still the gayest one here? Just saying," Bim affirms as an afterthought.

"The Host asks all of the egos to stop blocking the hallway."