#i literally fucking HATE the treatment he got in this movie

[sailorsunspot]

barbie spoilers ahead, these are my general thoughts on the movie

DO NOT READ IF YOU CARE ABOUT SPOILERS FOR BARBIE

The GOOD:

Sasha

Biggest note is I don't know why the movie wasn't about her???

I thought she felt really true and honest and a great representation of the unique position Gen Z have been put in.

Her preteen disaffected angst and disillusion felt SO correct, both because at that age you just feel jaded and angst but also? Because she's right to be jaded and angsty in a lot of ways. All the stuff she's been told and promised? DONT work out the way it should

I think they kind of missed the mark on really digging into her and her relationship with Gloria and her relationship with Barbie (which is a proxy for womanhood). Think you could have had an incredible movie talking about all the ways the concept of Barbie serves/hurts women through different generational lenses. Because Barbie was useful to Gloria but was also a cudgel (as it was a major plot point, her making these "wrong" Barbie's as a coping mechanism). And we know how Sasha felt with her iconic Sasha rant, but also, she wound up missing the whimsy and the joy and the inspiration Barbie offers

ANYWAY I love Sasha so much, I wish the movie featured her more, and I thought her journey when it came to getting closer to her mother by protecting her mother's ideals and wants and intentionally trying to make space for other women (she did that with both her mom AND ALSO with Barbie at the end, where she was literally the only character like: "Okay, but what about what Barbie wants???") was extremely well written and touching.

The Humor & Style

Not all the bits landed for me, but I generally loved the pro-camp and playful tone of the movie, and genuinely laughed at several points

Genuinely loved the style and the visuals - 10/10

The Content Editting

Tbh, I thought it was smart that they were like: yep, nope, we're not touching racism/ablism in this movie, we're just cool with it. Because…there's just so much to discuss, and no one story can service all things.

The BAD

Barbie's roll as a protaganist

I think this was intentional, but she was the most passive protaganist I've ever seen? Thoughts on this was she was just kind of like…an object to be projected onto so this kind of tracks with the theming of the movie right - like she was forced to go on her heroes journey against her will, when she returns home, she doesn't "save" Barbie-land, she gives up and it's actually Sasha and Gloria and Weird Barbie that does the saving (both because they want to try and also they come up with the plan). I think the most agency she shows in the movie is going to console Ken (which…will talk on that point more later), until the VERY end, when she chooses to become a real "woman". Really her role is more of the witness in the movie?

The Mattel thing

Originally I hated this and would have cut the entire Will Farrel thing, but my friend brought up some interesting points about how that might've been an intentional dig on the uselessness of corporate structure, etc. I still woulda cut it, but that at least makes it an interesting thought experiment tbh.

The Focus on Barbieland

Yeah I know it's like impossible to solve like…Patriarchy in the real world so in that sense it's smart to limit the scope of the danger to a play world where change can actually happen in a satisfying way overnight but like…

In the end, I feel like i dont know anything about Gloria and Sasha other than what I, a reasonably learned media consumer, can infer from the context? Idk, felt like a missed opportunity to dig more into their actual real life experience with womanhood instead of saving the fake construct idea of womanhood, because then we lack context on why the way Barbieland has "changed" is for the better. Since Barbieland and Barbie as a whole is a proxy for the idea of "woman", it felt like we needed more

The plot is supposed to be a reflection of the internal struggle, also known as the "story". How does saving Barbieland reflect onto the main characters of the story, (Barbie, I guess?) Is it just that she realized she no longer wanted to serve the ideal and

the UGLY:

Very VERY narrow definition of Womanhood

This is partially intentional cause of the dolls, but, lol, you cannot have a feminist movie and not cover things like queerness, GNC, etc. Or I guess you can, but it just comes off as the most superficial white liberal version of feminism imaginable. Disappointing, considering the movie did a good job of saying "we're not touching racism and ableism, not because it doesnt exist but because there's only so much we can fit in a movie" but it at least acknowledged those things with their active presence in the movie.

ESPECIALLY since Barbie = the proxy for womanhood, I guess fuck me i'm not a woman then haha

I KNOW that the cast included a trans actor, but that that means nothing within the context of the story other than, congrats show-runners for correctly identifying women, lmao.

Similarly, you absolute CAN have a million and one queer "interpretations" of Barbie, of the Kens, of Allen in particular. Still, it's all on the person who interprets it, not actually in the subtext of the story. Yeah sorry in the year of 2023 I dont give properties props for making me do the work for them, that's some tumblr ass bullshit i cannot abide by. Support my reading with the text or it doesn't count.

Literally all you needed was a single barbie who expanded the view of a woman was, a single Barbie who was like "actually maybe i want to wear Ken's clothes" or "maybe I dont want to hang out with Ken maybe I want to hang out with this other Barbie winkyface".

Ken

Why

No seriously, why

Why does even the Barbie movie, made for Barbie, made for girls, have to cater to the opinions and emotions of fucking MEN?

I have a lot to say about this, but instead of railing on this ad nauseam the big things are:

Ken literally never even apologized for intentionally using the patriarchy to intentionally hurt barbie.

Barbie had to apologize to ken??? For accidentally hurting his feeling by not giving him the attention he wanted?

How did they turn this "feminist" movie into such fucking incel bait holy shit

They were clearly doing the "patriarchy hurts everyone" bullshit but like, they literally covered that with Allan???

so it just makes it feel more BS when they, literally in the fucking text of the movie, have to remind Barbie with Gloria saying "hi, stop infantalizing/mothering your babymanchild he stole your home, fucked up your life, ruined your town" and Barbie was like Yeah you right girl and then not 20- minutes later GAVE IN ANYWAY.

I know im a man hating dyke but fuck. when they make THE LITERAL BARBIE MOVIE about making men comfortable then i think i am 100% in the right to be fucking pissy about this

[sweetestcaptainhughes]

Moments in Time - Quinn Hughes Edition

Word Count - 2300

Summary - The eight times Quinn Hughes showed his love through the ring camera that he didn’t even want in the first place.

Warnings - none pure fluff I know a true shocker if you aren't new here

Author's Note: Hello everyone as always thank you for reading. This is apart of a "Moments in Time" series that I wrote eight moments each of the Hughes brothers. The fics are individual stand alone pieces, they can be read in any order, or you could only read the one brother you want.

Jack Hughes Edition. Luke Hughes Edition.

I have to give credit to my girl Kay @icebound-imagination for not only helping come up with the original idea! But literally stayed up late one night to help me detail plan all three Hughes brothers fics because I didn't want any repeated ideas. Kay also wrote some of the concepts and hers are noted as "Kendra's Version."

Main Masterlist

When you mentioned to Quinn the first time that you wanted to get a ring doorbell he gave you that famous “what the fuck” Quinn Hughes look. But then when you told him about how you really just wanted it in Vancouver because of how much time you spent completely alone in the apartment. To this day, you swear you’ve never heard Quinn agree to anything so fast. Truthfully you just wanted to watch your neighbor’s new puppy growth. But you knew that if there is anyone who hates you having to be completely alone for so long with no family around it’s Quinn. So really it was best of both worlds, Quinn felt more at ease with the ring camera and you got to watch the next door neighbor be ridiculously cute everyday on the way to their walks. 

 Early Morning Goodbyes

Quinn had to leave early many times throughout the season. Although he always kissed you goodbye on the cheek, because you were still deep in sleep you both knew you wouldn’t remember it. Learning this after the first time he did kiss you goodbye before leaving for a roadie and you didn’t remember it at all. To say you were mad at Quinn for not saying goodbye, you gave him the silent treatment for two whole days, only to discover you were the one in the wrong. 

So the next time he had to leave home early due to an early flight for a roadie or hell, even an early morning skate. Of course he still kissed your cheek and whispered his goodbyes. But he started saying bye on the ring because he knew that way you’d see it when you were actually a functionable human being to society and would remember it. 

2. Getting a notification

The main reason that Quinn agreed to getting a ring was because of how you said that you would feel safer when he was on long roadies. The first time that you came home from work and he was on a roadie, he was waiting for the notification to come on his phone. As soon as it popped up he clicked on it quickly, ignoring his teammates and the movie they had playing in the background. “Hi baby.” he said softly he didn’t wanna startle you. After a long day all you wanted to do was crawl into bed, “hi Quinny” immediately hearing his voice and feeling better. 

“What are you doing? Aren’t you supposed to be doing some team bonding?” Resting your forehead against your doorbell but looking directly at the camera.

“Oh I am Barbie is playing right now it was Brock’s turn to pick.” A soft laugh leaves both your lips at Quinn’s comment, your laugh continues when you hear Brock in the background telling him to “fuck off.” Quickly Quinn tells you that he’s gotta go but he will text you. 

That was the first night you guys had a full blown conversation through your ring camera when he was on a roadie. But it became a little tradition every night when you got home if Quinn was out of town. Even if at the time he was in the middle of a game or an interview, everyday you would ring the doorbell and say “Quinny I’m home.”  

3. Drop the attitude 

Quinn and you didn’t fight often but when you did it was usually something serious. Today was not one of those cases, it was just one of those days where you were in a bad mood all day and you couldn’t pin point why. But every little thing Quinn was doing was getting on your nerves, to the point of you wanting to scream. From procrastinating on unloading the dishwasher, to being indecisive about what he wanted for breakfast. By the time you were trying to take a nap and he was yelling on Facetime with Jack and Luke you had hit your breaking point. 

Storming into the living room and telling Quinn that he needed to leave the apartment because you needed time alone before you went insane. Quinn told his brothers he’d call them back and hung up. He tried to ask you what was wrong but you insisted that you needed him to leave. So he left but not without leaving a message on the ring camera. 

“I don’t know where this attitude is coming from, baby. But what do you need for it to go away? Like do we need food? Are you hangry? Do you need cuddles and some quiet time? Cause whatever you need imma give it to you if you drop the attitude. Cause I don’t like when you want to kill me.” 

4. Celebrating 

Every home game that you went to it wasn’t unusual for you to uber from the apartment to the stadium. But you would always wait until Quinn was ready to leave to go home to the game. Tonight there was a home game and you were planning on going. But this week has been so long at work, you were debating on just watching it on T.V, ultimately you did decide to take an uber to the game. Never have you been so happy to not miss out on a game live. It was an insane game that turned out to be a shutout with no other than baby goalie as starter. 

Quinn and you both decided to go to the local bar to celebrate with the team and other wags. After Quinn had 2 beers, and you lost track of the amount of rum and cokes Petey was giving you. Quinn decided it was time to call it a night. Once you got home, your not sure if it was the alcohol you both consumed or just still on a high from the game. But Quinn insisted on practically sprinting down the hallway to your apartment while you cheered about the game. Quinn has never felt so lucky the night when the ring camera was able to catch such an intimate private moment that neither of you would have remembered that morning without the video proof. 

5. Playing pranks - Kendra’s Version 

You had just settled onto the couch, a warm bowl of popcorn balanced in your lap as your phone screen lit up. You picked it up and checked to see you had a notification from the front door’s security camera. It was Friday night, which meant you weren’t getting any deliveries and your husband, Quinn, was home in the shower. 

Curiously you click into the app, seeing what the footage showed. And it wasn’t much. But what you could see was some blonde hair and a toque. You knew exactly who that hair and that hat belonged to. What on earth was he doing? 

Your finger hovered over the screen as you decided what to do about your husband’s teammate when the camera showed a flash of a stylish jacket, one that was definitely not the style of the blond hair and toque wearing teammate. Which meant his literal partner in crime was with him. And then it was like someone smashed their finger onto a fast forward button. 

You were getting ready to use the two way microphone to ask what was going on when you heard a crashing noise. Your finger hit the button quickly as you yelled out “What on earth are you two blond himbos doing out there? Brock I swear to god if you’re leaving your laundry for me to do again I’m throwing it in the Pacific!” 

You were too busy screaming to notice you weren’t the only one who heard the ruckus Dumb and Dumber had made. Quinn must have seen the security notification when he got out of the shower, heard your screaming, and now he was angrily stomping towards the front door and opening it up to figure out what was going on.

Brock, who must have tried to hide from the camera, was leaning against the door. Except the door was ripped open by your angry husband and Brock came tumbling backwards into the foyer. His signature smirk and deep voice trying to play innocent. “Hey Huggy.” 

You decided it was time to get off the couch and look for yourself. As you pushed past Quinn and Brock you leaned against the door frame. This was when you noticed the white stuff all over and that Petey was doubled over in laughter.

This left Brock to be the one to fess up their master plan, “Well we figured it would be Quinn that would see the camera not you. He’s ALWAYS checking it in the locker room. After me and the Swede had too many tonight we wanted to have some fun. And what’s more fun than pranking the captain? We wanted him to open the door to pie him. Get glitter stuck in his playoff beard. You weren’t supposed to catch us, Y/N.” 

You looked back at Petey, now understanding why he was sparkling under your porch lights.

“Sorry about the plant,” he wheezed. 

You could feel Quinn’s glare get darker. Brock however was unaffected by the quiet brooding man. “Petey will pay for it because he makes more money.” 

6. “Where the fuck you going in that dress?”

Quinn wasn’t as overprotective over you as people assumed he would be with his girlfriend. He trusted you and he also knew that you knew how to keep yourself safe when you were out with friends for a girls night. But at the same time he didn’t like it when you went out when he was on a roadie. Quinn made the comment about how when he’s a plane ride away it gives him anxiety when you're out with friends drinking. He said that he would feel terrible if something bad happened or even if you needed a ride home and he couldn’t come to you because he was on the other side of the continent. Since you weren’t a big partier anyway, from that night on you did tend to only go out if Quinn was in town. Never wanting to be the reason you brought your boyfriend to the breaking point with his anxiety. 

But it was your best friend having her birthday and you couldn’t not go. It had completely slipped your mind about your new ring camera and how Quinn was basically addicted to checking it especially when he was on the road. After coming over to get ready at your place. Finally you were ready to order the uber and as you were locking the door, you heard Quinn’s voice “Where the hell are going in that dress?” You could tell from his voice that he was definitely a little annoyed. It was probably because he knew even from the shitty ring camera quality that this was your go to clubbing dress. 

“Hi bubs. It’s Y/B/F birthday tonight.I know your out on a roadie which is why I didn’t tell you.” You said as you bent down so that your face was lined up with the camera. “I am realizing now that wasn’t my smartest idea. I promise I won’t be out long okay? I’ll text you as soon as I get home, Quinny.” Quinn could hear the guilt in your voice and it made his heart break a little. 

“It’s okay baby girl. Just be safe okay. I love you. Also your making me miss you even more cause you look really really fucking beautiful in that dress.” As much as you tried to hide your blush you knew that you were failing miserably. 

“Thanks Quinn. I love you.” as you stood up and blew a kiss to the camera.

7. Fidgety Hughes 

Sometimes Quinn’s fidgeting was out of this world insane even for him. Whether it was that he sometimes let himself get lost in his head and didn’t realize how bad it had gotten. Or if shaking his leg or tapping his fingers on thighs calmed his anxiety. But sometimes his fidgeting was just adorable and this was no difference. Quinn was trying to unlock the door but his hands kept fidgeting probably due to the rough practice or maybe it was just from being tired. But after dropping his keys the fourth time you couldn’t help but chirp him through the camera. 

“I hope you can handle a puck better than those keys Hughes.” Quinn couldn’t help but smile at your voice through the camera.

“Oh I can name a lot of things you tell me all the time I handle better than these keys.” playing along with your antics but with a flirty tone. But then of course he dropped his keys on the floor for the fifth time. 

“Come on get it together bro.” you chirp.

“Don’t be such a brat, unless you need a reminder of who you beg to help you when you have an itch.” 

8. Long Week

Quinn knows that you’ve had a long week and been very stressed because of it. So he stops at the store on his way home and grabs all your favorite snacks that he knows you will want later when you come home from work. He decides to ring the camera to tell you that he got all your favorite snacks and will be ready when you get home for a movie night or whatever you want. Even if it’s The Office which he never even saw a single episode until he met you and you forced him to. He also tells you that he already placed an order to your favorite restaurant for takeout.

[dreemurr-fever]

Ok I can't wait til after work I need to yap right NOW because this show will NOT leave my mind

Spoilers for Earthspark season 3 below

Ok so I'm not very good at articulating myself and my thoughts are all over the place so I'll just right it down in a messy list and probably expand on it later:

Breakdown talking about the Decepticons being his family and all that pisses me off. He always referring to Bee as his brother (which is something else I'll yap about in a bit) and yet he keeps betraying him!! Also not to mention how he's basically Aftermath's dad, he literally called him son last season, and after that episode he just stopped caring about him. Didn't even react to his death or even acknowledge him after episode 1 of season 2.

SKULLCRUNCHER!!! THATS ALL!!! I LOVE SKULLCRUNCHER SO MUCH!!! I WISH THEY'D GIVE HIM A VOICE!!!! THEY BULLIED HIM SM IN THIS SEASON 😭

Shockwave and Soundwave stand next to each other and interact. I win! I win!!!! WaveWave is real and canon!!! /J

The treatment of Starscream this season 😐

Actually back to point one, with the amount of "family" talk about Breakdown makes me curious on what happened between him and the Stunticons? I wonder if one of the reasons he wants to go back to Cybertron so bad is to reunite with them?

I love the reference to the iconic Shockwave cover from the Marvel comics

I WANT FAIREMAESTRO DEAD HES THE WORST VILLAIN THEY'VE EVER COME UP WITH PLEASE HE'S SO ANNOYING

Episode 2 was eh not the worst (that goes to episode 3, I fucking that that guy) but yeah. I kinda like the subtle hints they dropped with Izzy.

Also I wanted to see the Kaiju in the movie :(

I giggled at the mole bot staring at it's reflection as and tearing up

I'm not even going to talk Abt episode 3

EPISODE 4 IS GREAT BUT ALSO UGH SO MUCH I NEED TO SCREAM ABT

IM GOING TO GET THIS OUT OF THE WAY, WHY DID THEY GET RID OF THE CONS AFTER THIS?! Like I'm actually happy the Cons actually won this time and they get to go home which totally means we finally get to see Cybertron next season. But after only ONE episode with the Cons, and one with Frenzy and Laserbeak making an appearance, THEY JUST GET RID OF THEM????

I'm so glad that this episode starts off immediately with the Ark falling. They wasted no time they KNEW we were here for Prowl and they delivered.

Speaking of that bastard, he's such a prick to everyone who's not Optimus AND I LOVE HIM

Prowl racism arc too 😭 him calling the kids organics and then asking if they're OP's PETS???

His look of disgust when Mo corrects him? I love him

I wish they referenced other bots sighs and kicks a rock... BUT!!! I'm glad we at least got some news as to what's going on on Cybertron when Prowl was last there. We know that Decepticons are in control of the space bridges last he checked.

The Decepticons being more than ready to beat the shit out of Prowl as soon as Shockwave allowed it??? They have BEEF with that guy. You KNOW Prowl is the most hated Autobot lmao

[rrr-is-gay]

RRR ON-SCREEN KISS OPPORTUNITIES, rated for her pleasure

1. Immediately following the fisher boy rescue. They go onto the dock and kinda embrace one another but fail to kiss. Not okay. 3/10

2. The thigh touch scene. Come onnnnn, I know they’re talking about Sita, but they coulda squeezed a lil kissy kiss in there, if they had any courage at all. 8/10

3. RAMBHEEM SQUAT WORKOUT. Not exactly the ideal shot for an onscreen kiss; we’d need to get a little creative with the camera work to keep it cohesive. But it would be the literal hottest thing EVER, so I hate that it isn’t real. 8/10

4. MAKEOVER SCENE!!!!!!!!!!!! This one demands a kiss, multiple times! The beard trim? Pop a lil kiss on his nose, Ram! The hair treatment? Kiss his forehead! Changing his shirt? Bheem, give’m a nice lil smooch! It’s practically canon, the camera just cuts too quickly for us to see it. 10/10, peak kiss opportunity.

5. Pre-Naatu. How fucking SWAG would it be for them to just pop the fastest lil kiss on each other’s lips RIGHT at the moment they dunk on Jake for not knowing Naatu? This precise moment, when Bheem twirls around and Ram puts his arm on his shoulder? KISS!! 6/10

6. Post-Naatu piggyback ride. Would have loved to see Bheem kiss Ram’s cheek here. Totally ungrateful that he doesn’t. Wtf Bheem. 9/10

7. Sopping fucking wet. Bheem could totally pop a quick kiss onto Ram's lips before administering the antidote here. He's all up in Ram's face anyway, tending to him, caring for him, healing him. A nice kiss would help!!!!!!! 7/10

8. MARRIAGE CEREMONY. Bheem. BHEEM. You adorn your lover with the holy thread of your tribe, but don’t seal the deal with a kiss?? Maybe he thinks it’s dubcon cuz Ram is basically unconscious. Would’ve loved a kiss here, but I respect the consent king. 4/10

9. REVEAL YOURSELF TO ME IN BED. Bheem could have AT LEAST kissed Ram’s hands here, I mean wtf!!!!!! You think you might die tonight, and you could be saying goodbye forever, and you DON’T kiss????? 10/10, scene incomplete without a tender smooch.

10. Devastating fight. Bheem could’ve gone out on a limb here and really brought Ram back to reality if he’d gone in for a kiss. A bold move, yes, but not out of character for Bheem. 3/10

11. Pain, pain paaaaiiinnnn. Ram is more devastated in this moment than he’s ever been in his entire life. He would absolutely kiss Bheem’s head while holding his limp body in his arms. Only gets a pass cuz Ram is still undercover and a kiss would’ve given him away. 2/10

12. Hand nuzzle. CANON, I TELL YOU!!!! It’s CANON that Bheem kisses Ram’s hand here! It was only cut from the film because of homophobia! 11/10

13. Burn this lanka down. Okay. It’s one swift move to pull Ram out from the cell and onto Bheem’s shoulders. So a kiss on the lips couldn’t work. But Ram could, and should, totally kiss Bheem’s head right here. And Bheem should kiss Ram’s wrist! The fight can wait one millisecond!!! JUST KISS ALREADY! 8/10

14. Bridal carry. A nice swift peck from Ram to Bheem would really boost both of their morale right here. And it's such a brief shot, I'm sure the kiss happened, we just didn't get to see it. Once again, homophobia. 9/10

15. CANON CANON CANON CANON. I don’t wanna hear ANY debate or disagreement on this one, you little freaks! They DO kiss here! I can see the intention in Bheem’s eyes! That slow lean inward!!!! He’s about to kiss this man smack on the lips!!!! And Ram is so tired, but he’s BLISSFULLY here for it! He’s flat on his back, ready for Bheem’s plush lips to smother his right NOW! HEAL THIS MAN WITH YOUR SWEET KISS, BHEEM!!!! 10000000000/10

16. Phallic rifle. Would love a nice little makeout sesh right here in front of Governor Scott. How fucking badass would that be? Not a little peck either, I want them to get really filthy for a minute, because they’ve earned it! Grip that rifle and stick your tongues in each other’s mouths! Come on, the movie’s almost over! What have you got to lose?! 9/10

17. “What can I offer you in return?” “KISS ME!” This really is the last chance for these two men to show us how they really feel. I get that it’s kinda awkward in front of their friends and family, but it’s all worth it just to make Jenny uncomfortable. (Why is she there?????) Oh wait, Sita’s there too. Meh. I still want them to smooch. 7/10

18. Etthara Jenda! Dance, smile, skip, cheer, KISS! This song is all about victory and pride. Wouldn’t an onscreen kiss just be the cherry on top?! I think so. 9/10

[bonefall]

Do you have a top 5 dotc characters line-up? Just ones you like in general

"Top 5" is really more of a... "guys I hate the least" lineup. Characters whose treatment made me so angry it's become spite-love. It's bad in here. It's REALLY bad in here.

In no particular order, the characters I like in DOTC are,

Bumble Not JUST because of how dirty she was done, either. Bumble's amazing. She's confident, she's outgoing, she's funny! She's there for Turtle Tail when Gray Wing is treating her like shit, and friendly to every cat she meets, even when they're being dicks to her. She ALWAYS does the right thing in the end and has the best interests of her friends at heart. She's a GOOD PERSON! The ONE time she was ever ANGRY at anyone was when Turtle Tail just let her get dragged back to their wifebeater. She's only part of TWO books but she's the BEST character in the entire arc, hands down, above and beyond the rest of the cast. JUSTICE for Bumble!

Bright Stream She got fridged, killed in a shocking, gruesome way, with uncomfortable detail put on how the pregnant woman probably died slowly and was eaten alive, ripped to shreds by eagles... for Clear Sky's man pain. Clear Sky literally fucking broods in a moonbeam. All because Gray Wing tripped like an idiot in a horror movie. And it was a WASTE. Bright Stream IS INTERESTING ALL ON HER OWN. Gray Wing was downplaying Clear Sky emotionally pressuring her into leaving, dismissing him going "I HOPE YOUR HUNTING SUCKS SO YOU REALIZE YOU SHOULD FOLLOW ME" with a 'good humored flick of his tail,' thirsting over how attractive Bright Stream is and how lucky Clear Sky is to have her as a mate while Bright Stream is obviously feeling upset about how her shitty husband has been talking to her. And it's actually insulting how the writers never acknowledged this-- that Clear Sky has ALWAYS been manipulative. From BOOK ONE. And then she has these absolutely bizarre Angel Fetus Children that Gray Wing coos about on his death bed, because god for-fucking-bid a single scene go by that doesn't become Clear Sky-centric.

Snake This arc tries SO bad to make this fucking guy a villain. SO hard. They describe his stinky breath and his bad teeth and how icky and gross he is, and they make him kill Frost during Clear Sky's Murder Party as if I'm supposed to blame HIM instead of the ESTABLISHED MURDERER WHO ORDERED HIS MEN TO KILL EVERYONE. Then, they choose HIM to stand up against Clear Sky after he let a murderous evil tyrant into his group against all warnings. And they treat that like it's a bad thing. Like SNAKE is the one who's awful for TELLING CLEAR SKY TO SHOVE HIS HALFHEARTED APOLOGY UP HIS UGLY ASS They even make him follow One Eye's evil lackey in the next book, like they're trying to slander him in hindsight. "Oh nonono, ackshually, Snake wasn't principled at all. He wasn't making a point about how Clear Sky let One Eye into his group and that he's sick of following tyrants. DONT WORRY. THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO DON'T LIKE CLEAR SKY ARE EVIL :)" FUCK you. I'm going to stan Snake OUT OF SPITE.

Tall Shadow While I still can't stand what they did with her and Bumble... she's an interesting character and done SO DIRTY because the writers don't fucking respect women at all They chose to have her go through a "self-confidence arc" because everyone nonsensically HATES her and just wants Gray Wing to lead, where she has to choose taking care of her burn-victim brother over leading because her "emotions" are getting in the way, only to clear up once her family is fucking dead because the books KEEP INSISTING that women in particular can't be leaders if they have an important emotional connection. And THEN they have Shaded-fucking-Moss, her predecessor, descend from heaven after Clear Sky's Murder Party to tut-tut at her for killing someone after she was THROWN INTO A CROWD OF PEOPLE TRYING TO MURDER HER, because I'm DEAD serious, god forbid women do anything. Clear Sky's got a direct body count of 3 at this point, PLUS the indirect body count of a dozen people killed on his orders, but ACTUALLY Tall Shadow is the one who deserves the fucking scolding. INSANE. And YET. She remains a practical person. She's diplomatic when she can be, and harsh when she cannot. Against all common sense, she LISTENS to Gray Wing's AWFUL advice to do Just One More peaceful meeting where maybe THIS time sucking Clear Sky's toes will work, because she is fair. I cannot help but love her.

Milkweed I haven't gotten to her in my read-along yet but she's done so dirty, too. It makes me sick. She's revealed to be a friend of Misty and distrusts the Mountain Cats for, you know... stealing all the native cats' land and murdering her friend? But don't worry, Gray Wing's here to do Clear Sky Apologetics and convince her to go join his group. While there she gets verbally accosted by Leaf, a recurring background asshole, who says she's useless, her stupid babies are stealing his food, and that when she gets sick she's just keeping the whole camp awake with her coughing. So anyway, because the Erins LOVE domestic abuse, they get shipped together lmaoo. Normal book series.

Bumble, Bright Stream, Snake, Tall Shadow, Milkweed. I also have feelings about Wind Runner though, and what they did with her. But GOD, explaining my complicated thoughts on Wind Runner would take a long time. She is both a favorite and also a symbol of several huge problems in WC.

[iwonderwh0]

Watching John Wick for the first time and commenting in real time because I'm watching alone.

Spoiler: I HATED it. Below I just bitch about how much it sucks.

Oh, Green Goblin!

What a cute dog, I hope nothing bad will happen to her (unfortunately I know it will)

Is it even safe for dogs to eat cereal with milk?

(speaking Russian) <- man those people speak with such a horrendous accent I wouldn't even recognise this language if it wasn't for subtitles.

Stop speaking "russian" it's so bad! It's not even just accent, it's grammatically so terrible it doesn't make any sense 😭

It always buggs me when some multi-million budget movie inserts some characters that speak languages other than english and do such a shit job at making it actually be the language they're trying to use. Like come on, is it so hard to find one person who speaks the language you want to use to ensure that it actually sounds accurate? I wonder if it is as bad with movies where side characters speak Chinese/Japanese or is it just European/Slavic languages that get this treatment.

Man, this is painfully bad. I mean, if a character speaking foreign language has this amount of active presence on screen why would you as a producer/director allow it to be this bad, it sounds like simlish. It's goofy.

I can't watch it seriously hearing them speaking.

I too get an urge to kill while cleaning up the floor.

Those subtitles are wrong, it's not what he said. He made some incomprehensible nonsense of noises.

I feel like I'm having a stroke hearing them.

I love multilingual movies, but this is not it. If it's so hard to find someone speaking Russian, make them speak some other language that you can actually show accurately.

Of course they drink vodka what else.

Fuck off, this is lazy.

"Baba Yaga" my ass, do you even know what it means? It's a folklore creature of what essentially is an old woman. Not just a boogie man. It's kind of a weird nickname to have as a man.

Fuck, even when they speak actual words they make inaccurate subtitles. THAT'S NOT WHAT HE SAID. This song isn't even about "Baba Yaga" you fools

This is what happens when people go for vibes of foreign countries instead of actually doing any kind of research.

I can't watch any kind of media in peace, dbh brain rot will find me anywhere.

Maybe it's because I'm now holding a prejudice, but even outside of this absolutely terrible job at making character portray Russian, this looks like a parody of a blockbuster rather than a blockbuster in itself

They're singing a fucking lullaby in a pool party 😭😭😭 just normal russian-villain behaviour

I'm sorry I just didn't expect it to suck this bad

Okay, that action sequence isn't that bad.

Maybe this movie would be better if they would just fight without ever attempting to talk out loud. Just grunting and moaning.

I'm not a medic but I suspect it's just as infuriating for them to watch this movie as it is for someone who understands Russian or at the really least knows what it sounds like.

You're telling me, a sniper with a fixed target missed? I'm starting to suspect that maybe it's not that John Wick is invincible but just the people who are after him are all incompetent morons.

"You were always a pussy" <- that was so unnecessary and goofy.

How the hell is this movie rated as high as it is, it's "The Room" of action movies, I swear. So bad to the point of almost going a full circle and becoming good.

Even as an action movie it's not that good either.

Other than Keanu Reeves there are literally no interesting nor likeable characters on screen. Everyone else are unremarkable and bland. Except for Marcus.

Maybe I'm missing something. Maybe I should be looking at it like a comedy, a parody. Because it really isn't good in itself.

THIS REALLY IS A COMEDY, isn't it?

I mean a dude literally got a headshot with a "wasted" gta sound effect.

Well, it was bad. It's a meme, but it's not really a good movie. Or I just don't think it is.

Surprisingly, "comedy" isn't listed among genres.

A BLADE RUNNER REFERENCE WHAT

[milimeters-morales]

for this ask meme: miles morales?

hope ur having a good day btw!!! <3

-AAUAAUGGH. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. ACROSS ALL SPIDER-MAN MEDIA HE IS MY NUMBER ONE!!!! I AM SO ANNOYING ABOUT HIM ^_^ and thank you i hope you are also having a good day/night!!

-Ganke and only Ganke. obviously! that’s his ride or die. that boy raised his baby sister at age 17 for like 20 years when the rest of the family was killed, and then killed himself and an evil clone of Miles to save Brooklyn and i am ALWAYS thinking about that. Even in the og comics Ganke is a real one, saying “okay you should be spider-man!” to “you can stop and take a break you know” and literally just being the best. he and miles stick with each other even when they do questionable/bad shit to each other, it’s just very sweet to see them overcome it all.

-miles and lana friendship save me miles and lana friendship. it would be him and kamala but they have a secret third thing going on (though i swear i said this in a post already). but yeah i see him and lana as nearly-sisterly, but in a bff way, not a familial way. does that make sense?

-now i am truly not sure if this is unpopular bc i only use tumblr, but i HATE that fucking sunflower song it is so annoying and it’s everywhere that Miles is and that’s like stabbing me with several needles. it’s only associated with him bc he sang it and it was in the movie, but tells us NOTHING about him. sure, he likes a SONG. he got the “character boiled down to food they ate once” treatment right there i SWEAR. it’s in everything and it drives me up the wall. why not talk about his powers!!! his skills!!! the actual cool shit he can do!!

-I wish he’d say nigga just once. just once. it doesn’t matter which version of miles says it. USM Miles can say it. The one from the toddler show can say it i don’t care. please it would heal something in me

[ryukang1995]

Why Mortal Kombat Legends: Battle of the Realms is trash

Earlier, I shared a post saying that I fucking hated Mortal Kombat Legends: Battle of the Realms...I guess I should explain why that is the case.

Simply put, it's a rushed and overstuffed mess.

This "movie" has a lot of the same issues we criticize both Mortal Kombat: Annihilation and the live-action reboot for. The biggest example is the fact that they cram in so many characters, and give them no kind of characterization as well as limited screen-time.

For example, tell me Jade's character and backstory without prior knowledge from the games...you can't, because she has none (besides being an Outworld goon), just like in Annihilation.

Li Mei is an Outworld loyalist with no spoken dialogue, and has one quick fight scene where she gets bodied by Sonya. It's literally the same kind of treatment that Nitara got in 2021, for fucks sake!

Reiko is in both this film and in the reboot, and while he's TECHNICALLY better here than in that film, it's not saying much since, again, he has no real character, and only serves as someone for Raiden to beat up.

Cyrax, Sektor and Smoke might as well be Triborg in the movie because they seem to share special moves with each other (example: Cyrax shoots missiles like Sektor when Cyrax never did that in the games).

It's unclear as to why Baraka is in this film since we saw a Tarkatan with the EXACT same design as him in Scorpion's Revenge get killed during his chase scene with Johnny Cage, and they don't even bother explaining it.

Kintaro is...about what I expected...not good, but Jax rips his arms out, and it's the goriest the heroes get against the villains in this movie (more on that later).

D'Vorah is trash, 'nuff said.

Kung Lao has even less of a character than he did in the reboot. He doesn't even have a single interaction with Liu Kang before he gets killed by Shao Kahn, which is his only major fight scene outside of the opening, by the way!

Stryker is pretty much the audience character since he's questioning everything, but again, he has very little character before he dies.

And frankly, our main characters are not much better...

Liu Kang is set up as being the one who will beat Shao Kahn, even though he got his shit wrecked by Goro in Scorpion's Revenge.

Sure enough, Liu Kang beats Kahn...but there is no kind of arc or build-up he goes through outside of constantly showing concern and emotion over Raiden and Kung Lao getting beat up and killed.

And by the time he fights Shinnok (again, more on that later), his victory comes off as hollow and unearned.

Raiden is a dumbass in this movie. I suppose it's better than how he was in the reboot, but again, not saying much. Much like in Annihilation, he gives up his godhood for practically no reason other than to serve as motivation for Liu Kang to win.

Johnny Cage is fucking grating to watch in this movie. He's not funny, he spends most of the film simping on Sonya (much like Scorpion's Revenge, except to the 10th power), and he loses the first fight in the Outworld tournament to D'Vorah of all fucking people!

And he has such a shitty line of dialogue in the climax where he tells Sonya "all of this death and bloodshed was worth it just to meet you", and rather than telling him to fuck off and see a psychiatrist, she embraces him like the Tsundere she is in these films!

Sonya's character in this movie is literally "Johnny is not my boyfriend. Johnny is not my boyfriend". She only accepts him once she gets put in danger, and here comes Alpha Male Johnny to save the day...it's fucking pathetic.

Kitana has no character in this movie. Liu Kang and Raiden tell her that what she's fighting for is bad, and she suddenly turns on Shao Kahn just because of that.

Then she gets beat up by Shao Kahn, and chained to his arena so that Liu Kang can save her near the end.

I wouldn't say I hated Jax, but again, there was not much to him.

Same with Shao Kahn. I suppose it's better than Brian Thompson in Annihilation, but again, there was not much to him.

Shang Tsung is pathetic. Give me Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa any day.

Sub-Zero is literally just rage boner. I get that his brother was killed, but that's literally his entire character before he buries the hatchet with Scorpion.

The best character in the movie is literally Scorpion, who actually matured compared to the previous film.

The movie tries to juggle multiple plot threads. You have the Outworld tournament, but you also have Scorpion and Sub-Zero trying to stop Shinnok and the Cyber Lin Kuei from getting the Kamidogu to resurrect The One Being, and the whole thing comes off as rushed and unfocused.

And again, the climax is literally a repeat of Annihilation with Liu Kang literally turning into a giant dragon to fight Corrupted Shinnok fused with The One Being...and I thought Ed Boon hated that film, despite being a creative consultant on THIS piece of shit!

The fight scenes suck. A lot of them last about 10 seconds, making them too brief to be enjoyed. The longest ones are Liu Kang vs. Shao Kahn, which is wannabe Dragon Ball Z, and the aforementioned Kaiju battle.

For some asinine reason, the villains get the goriest fatalities in the movie whereas the heroes barely kill them outside of random goons in certain scenes...and this is supposed to be Mortal Kombat!

It does not help that you have some really poor and inconsistent animation throughout, likely a result of them rushing the movie and slashing the budget.

If I have to be brutally honest, this is probably the worst Mortal Kombat movie, besides Annihilation, because of just how much this movie squanders, and even then, there were aspects of Annihilation I liked more than this turd (the simpler focus, the main characters were better, SOME of the fight scenes, and especially the soundtrack).

Do yourself a favor, just stick to the games, or watch the 1995 movie again.

[catastrophicmind]

Get to know me (take two)

I came across this little prompt and thought we could continue sharing about ourselves. Believe it or not, but I’m invested in y’all and would love to get to know everyone! 😁

Are you named after anyone?: No, but everyone assumes my parents are huge Allman Brother fans because my name is Melissa. When I asked my mom about it, she informed me that she, in fact, hates the Allman Brothers. She just thought the name was pretty.

When was the last time you cried?: Ooh, boy. About a month ago when I made amends to my mom for all the hell I put her through. We both cried like babies.

Do you have kids?: None currently. I’d actually prefer to be a dog mom. The thought of having mini versions of me roaming the Earth is quite terrifying.

Do you use sarcasm a lot?: It’s literally the only way I know how to communicate. I absolutely love sarcasm and dry humor.

What’s the first thing you notice about people?: Physically, I go for the eyes— they’re a window to the soul. I actually can read people very well. Someone’s eyes say a lot about who they are as an individual. I normally can accurately hone in on their intentions and emotions within the first five minutes of talking to them. I’m big on reading energy. Plus, I’m a sucker for pretty irises.

What’s your eye color?: Hazel to be vague. Normally they switch between green and gold depending on my mood. It’s actually pretty cool.

Scary movies or happy endings?: Scary movies hands down. Not a huge romance fan. I thoroughly enjoy reading fluffy fan fiction, but I’m not big on lovey-dovey movies. I need to be on the edge of my seat the entire time. I get bored watching people fall for each other over a two hour timeframe.

Any special talents?: Heh. I was in concert and marching band for eight years. I can play any type of symphonic instrument you put in front of me from a flute to a tuba. I specialize in reed instruments but that didn’t stop me from learning how to play them all. Also, I play by ear. You can play any song you wish and within thirty seconds, I can pick out the key and play it in its entirety without reading any sheet music. I actually wrote a lot of scores for the football game music.

Where were you born?: Good ‘ol Raleigh, North Carolina where I currently reside. I’ve lived up and down the East Coast, but always manage to make it back home. I don’t intend to leave this beautiful area any time soon.

What are your hobbies?: I’m actually pretty boring. I do a lot of writing and reading, I’m obsessed with music (you can almost always find me with my headphones in) and other lame adult things. I’m getting to an age where all I do is work and come home to relax. I try to keep a structured life. I’m horrendous to be around if I don’t plan my day out in advance.

Have any pets?: No, my lease won’t allow it. My mom still has our family Cockapoo, Cody, we brought home the summer of my Senior year. He may not live with me, but I love him immensely. He’s like the annoying little brother I never wanted and came to grow quite fond of.

What sports do you play/have played?: I was not a sporty gal. Did four years of marching band in high school. It was intense considering we were the top band in the state all four years. We’d travel to Grand Nationals every winter and place in the semi-finals for the country. I got to march on the Indianapolis Colts stadium— that was pretty fucking rad. Had me in phenomenal shape too. I used to be able to run a five-and-a-half-minute mile.

How tall are you?: I’m five-foot-seven-and-a-half. Sometimes I wish I could be petite like other girls, but it works in my favor when I want to reach something on the top shelf.

Favorite subject in school?: History and Psychology. I loved learning about anything to do with what happened in our country and the world long before we arrived. I also adore understanding the brain and why it functions the way it does.

Dream job?: Substance Abuse Counselor. I’d love to work in a treatment center to help individuals struggling with dual diagnosis. I have personally been fighting addiction since I was twenty. I’m coming up on a year of sobriety early March and my dream is to give back what was so selflessly given to to me in my time of need. I want to bring positive change to the world for addicts that believe there is no hope. It actually gives me butterflies thinking about it.

Tagging: @the-type-a @heysatanitsyourgirl @webui1tgwensface @sentimentalslut @plutosschild @honeynotgood @duncans-unibrow

[umbramatic]

Trust The Fungus

This is a review ramble thing of The Super Mario Bros Movie (the 2023 one, not the one from 30 years earlier the title is joking about, but more on the 1993 one later). There will be spoilers.

(You will see me using the word "cringe" a lot in this. Disclaimer: I do not actually believe in cringe culture at all in the slightest in ANY form, it's just a useful shorthand for a special sort of deep revulsion within the soul. Anyway.)

So like, we all went into this expecting cringe because Illumination, right? The animation studio that peaked with their FIRST MOVIE, Despicable Me, and has put the low in lowbrow ever since. The animation studio who actively animates on the cheap for profit margins. Those guys. 

But I, to start, want to report there are minimal amounts of cringe! Sure, "look at us, we're adorable" was cringe in the trailers and it's cringe here. Sure Mario hating mushrooms was a specific flavor (mushroom flavored?) of unnecessarily ironic that made me roll my eyes a bit even when the REST of the unnecessarily ironic humor didn't. But overall, it was good! Honestly I genuinely liked this movie a lot! 

You probably haven't heard of Monster Hunter: Legends Of The Guild, a low-budget animated Monster Hunter movie Capcom quietly pushed to Netflix when the live-action one turned out to be shit. I always thought that one wasn't that great as a movie on its own but unlike the live action one was fantastic at actually being a MONSTER HUNTER movie - sort of an inverse of the Dark Knight Trilogy's modern "good movie bad Batman movie" reputation. This one is honestly quite similar, even though I at least personally think it stands on its own better than Monster Hunter: Legends Of The Guild does. 

A large part of this is one of the movie's biggest strengths: the fanservice. And no I don't mean "Princess Peach in a bikini" fanservice. I mean THE LORE. There is soooooo much Mario lore here, and Nintendo homages, and different characters popping up left and right. 

Every time I saw a reference or cameo I, like many, was like

And that in a way being the main draw over the plot and characters WOULD be kind of a bad thing but it's just so much fun and there's so many of them I don't care. On a related note everything's so on brand, it again genuinely feels like a MARIO movie. We all know Nintendo's kind of the Disney Lite of the video game world in terms of being overly controlling - lost ROM sites and fan projects and such sure are testament to that huh - but here it kind of worked in their favor because they very obviously kept Illumination in line. You can bet your bottom dollar that Shigeru Miyamoto poured over every frame of this movie and if there was something he didn't like it got the Paper Mario treatment. 

Granted, we do start the movie with the Mario Bros living in real-world (if Nintendofied) Brooklyn, a take Nintendo is still apparently okay with despite Odyssey kinda sorta retconning it, and we see the Mario Bros having JOBS and a (a VERY Italian American, can confirm) FAMILY and it all feels akin to my gender and body dysphoria (Charles Martinet is Mario's dad though, that's really cute) but also it makes sense for the story they're trying to tell and it doesn't last long. 

I should talk about the cast. I was pretty chill with how everyone did. Sure they shouldn't have been stuntcasted this fucking hard in the first place. Sure Fred Armisen as Cranky Kong took some growing on me. Sure I have noted Sociopolitical Problems with Crisp Rat and they should have cast literally anyone who is less Problematic(tm). Burt everyone did fine for what they were. 

(Also say what you will about the Ironic(tm) humor, despite that kind of stuff Mario and Luigi's relationship feels real and genuine and I am here for it. I'm normally not THAT into same-gender sibling relations because that's not what I grew up with and NOW the gender situation is complicated but c'mon, they were cute.)

Also Jack Black got to sing. That alone made this movie worth seeing for me. The music was SUPER good when it's stuff like Bowser's singing and the cool remixed Mario tracks. The licensed music was a lot less necessary and in one case apparently replaced a perfectly good Donkey Kong remix  and almost all of it could have been cut... Aside from the I Need A Hero sequence, that was inspired. 

Speaking of Bowser. I like that they basically nudge nudge hint hint at Mario and Peach being an item but never actually do anything about it (just like the games!) whereas Bowser is UNDENIABLY horny on main for Peach and sees Mario as competition (also just like the games!) . Speaking of the references, they even use Bowser and Peach's Odyssey wedding outfits, which is cute. 

(Also can we make Girlboss Peach game canon please?)

This movie does have a sense of... "This world operates on video game logic. We will try to explain it but we will not JUSTIFY it" and I think that's neat. At first I thought that was a factor as to why this movie was less popular with critics than fans, but I went with my mostly non-gamer family (more on them later) and not only could they follow it fine, my mom told me after the movie she understood video games and video game logic BETTER after seeing this movie so I dunno. 

I will say. For a movie that is trying to distance itself from and replace the 1993 one as much as possible there are a lot of funny parallels. The Brooklyn origins leading to a secret portal beneath the city, Bowser's minions trying to isolate and strand our heroes, having One Toad In Particular help our heroes, the funky ass cars/karts, the princess of choice being more serious and also an isekai victim, the final fight being taken BACK to Brooklyn...  It's amusing. 

But overall I had fun. I want to see it again. I went to see it with my family and they enjoyed it too. Though if I had a nickel for every time a video game movie I saw on my birthday with my family that had a wedding scene that gets memed on by said family due to an upcoming wedding in said family I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot but it's weird it happened twice. Damn. Now I want Hollywood movies for every major Nintendo franchise that hasn't gotten one. And by "major" I mean "important enough to get into Smash". ROB and Game And Watch movies when? (More seriously I want Zelda and Fire Emblem and full-length Pikmin movies. God please.)

[kurokoros]

As we are talking about Steve's character rn, I completely agree with anything you said so far. To add to the whole s3/s4 treatment, I just hate the whole "babygirlyfication" by the fandom because of how s3/s4 was written. Like if I hear the word babygirl one more time. I think what annoys me the most about it is that in Steve's case, babygirl=stupid himbo loser, and ughh, I just hate it so much. Yes he wore that dumb sailor outfit but he hated it every second he had to be in it, but the fandom overlooks that completely and decided yeah Steve loves to dress feminine and all (mostly to pair him up with other characters like Eddie and to subject him into weird ship dynamics where he's like the submissive partner). I swear, ever since s3 people think Steve is so helpless in everything, they also act like he's a super virgin who just can't get anyone, which contradicts s1/s2 Steve. I mean, okay, he could have had a funk in s3 bc of Nancy, but the show over exaggerated it to a point it was so ooc. I think the scene I hated the most in s3 is his last one, where he needed Robin to get him the job at FV because apparently he hadn't seen any movie prior to this day (despite being a huge Tom Cruise fan). It's so annoying really because they simplified him so much. He could be such a great character with depth, but nope. And the fandom perpetuates this by making him the dumb babygirl his entire personality. You're literally one of the few people trying to pick up after s2 and develop him in a way that makes more sense than what the show did.

Other characters the show did dirty after s2 are Hopper (bc what was up with him in s3 like it was actually scary), Joyce, Mike, Jonathan (well actually he got fucked over by being Nancy's accessory since s2) and partially Dustin esp in s4. The writers needed a department that overlooks character contingency because those are not the same ones we watched in s1/s2. I love Stranger Things, I do, but my god, the wasted character potential sometimes keeps me up at night. I'm not a talented writer, I try my best, but even I would have come up with better storylines or at least make sure they stay the same characters.

The whole "babygirl Steve" thing makes me want to eat glass. Like, I get mad when I think about how they went the himbo route with Steve instead of continuing the "jerk with a heart of gold" characterization they had going for two seasons, and to see the fandom just constantly make "babygirl Steve!" jokes irritates the hell out of me. I don't want to be that bitch who says you aren't allowed to headcanon characters certain ways, or you aren't allowed to project on characters, but damn some of the Steve stans genuinely make me question whether or not they actually like him in the first place. Like... Steve is a masculine guy! But people saw that he has a haircare routine and cares about hygiene and decided that makes him feminine to fit a queer stereotype so they can ship him with the two most mediocre white boys the show could offer.

And it really is super fucking weird that S3 "babygirl" Steve is portrayed as less intelligent and more pathetic than he was in S1/2. It's infantilizing. And the sailor suit makes it worse. If I could change one thing about ST I would get rid of that stupid fucking sailor suit. The show really did just make Steve seem pathetic in S3, and it was done in a way that I just don't understand why anyone who actually likes Steve would enjoy what they did.

Along with the "Steve can't get a job on his own" (which doesn't make sense if he was apparently a trained lifeguard. this man would have actual references aside from his mother if that was the case) thing, I have a bone to pick with the recurring gag of "Steve doesn't get pop culture references". Like??? Steve was a popular kid in school??? He would know movies (if only because movies are a super common date activity and there's a theater in Hawkins).

I refuse to acknowledge S3-4 as canon in any of my fics because of how much I despise the way canon botched most of the characters. There was so much potential there, and instead they just made Steve a loser with no charm. The Duffers for sure need someone in charge of characters. And plot. And worldbuilding. And overall consistency.

Basically, the Duffers need to hire actually good writers and just stick to directing.

[g-l-o-w-y-l-i-g-h-t-s]

To balance it out here's a dump of some of my "mean" female faves

Elektra Natchios

Torture

Apocalypse-causing

Toying with Matt's mind bc she's bored

Toxic QUEEN ✨💖

Catherine the Great

God where to even start. She's done so many crimes against humanity. She more or less kept Leo captive until he developed Stockholm syndrome thoroughly enough that she could string him along for her coup then got him killed as he predicted would happen. This is one example that kind of shows her general treatment of almost everyone around her. Her goals are noble but...yeesh. She's a fucking monster. Good for her.

Georgina (The Great)

Manipulative, schemer. Constantly angling for status and power. Old school noble who wants to keep her insane abusive dictator boyfriend in power bc he will give her presents. All-around bad person. I love her.

Pauline Phoenix

She possessed people. She keeps a hall of animatronics designed to look like her ex-husbands. She should never be trusted. She has kidnapped people. I love her.

Courtney (Dead End)

She betrays her friends. She's chaos incarnate most of the time. She Regrettably once picked up a gig as basically a paranormal cop (I know. I KNOW) She ate a guy once.

Doctor Olivia Octavius

Best iteration of this literal cartoon villain. She's so pretty omg. This is such good character design. Anyway she tried to kill a child or two a few times. So what?

Duke (Bit 2019)

!!!!!!!

COOLEST CHARACTER TO FEATURE IN THE GREATEST MOVIE

She kills a lot of people and some of them are bad people but plenty of them are literally just some guy

Also she brainwashed her friends 😔

My greatest wish is to be one of her victims

Jennifer Check

A classic. She's not killing people she's killing boys.

Harley Quinn

Ajsllsisjsjs. She's got a soft side but she's still fucking evil. She lost everything because of the Joker and now she's making the most of it having fun and being a villain and destroying shit. I love her. Honorary mentions go to her associates Huntress, Black Canary, Poison Ivy, and Ratcatcher 2 (although Ratcatcher 2 and Black Canary aren't particularly villainous or mean but they still get construed as villains if not by the narrative then by the other characters)

North (DBH)

Vastly hated in fandom for being justfiedly angry and traumatized. Literally she just wants to free her people from actual slavery and she doesn't think that can be done peacefully. Y'all wanna redeem Gavin Reed the RACIST COP before youll admit that North is everything you wish Gavin was. She's justified and angry and brave and I love her and she was step 1 in my gay awakening.

people are literally so boring a male character will kill 10000 people and steal candy from babies and theyll be like omg thats my king! but a female character is rude once and theyre like i hope she dies violently

[bitchy-peachy]

Currently wearing a face mask in bed cos everything smells to me so intensely after my last infusion.

I hate this shit. I think the next infusion is my last. I definitely hope so cos these weird ass symptoms got me exhausted.

Also I gained so much water weight but can barely sweat it off in exercise cos I'm so doggone tired.

I did get hyper and clean the bathroom in my room at 3 am. Fucking rude earthbound spirits be waking me up at that time (yes I'm pissed) so I cleaned up the bathroom which thankfully exhausted me to sleep again.

Can't go to a cemetery until I'm over this treatment which sucks since I feel at peace there due to me having a death deity as my main deity. Despite him being a death deity he's actually healing me so it's not good to judge. He's also keeping my dramatic ass calm since he's got such a soothing gentle presence.

Yeah, I might look crazy to non-believers but this is a family thing 🤣. Well at least half of the family. The other half are... well they're those conservative christians.

Yes I can differentiate between a christian and a conservative one. (The conservative ones are assholes. Both my parents were assholes until I went to the "bad side" of the family which literally follow the old traditions)

Shockingly enough I married a christian but he's got an overly kind beautiful soul that balances my bruja ass out ☺️.

Ahhh my meds got me rambling again and oversharing.

But I can feel my body healing but the side effects suck so bad. I want my stamina back.

I did a reading and it said I'll be back to my old self by April of next year because that's when the after effects of my treatment are out of my body. It's the treatment that has me feeling like absolute shit now.

Watched some movies from Shudder earlier. Ate something for my anemia. Did laundry, bothered my relative about his meds and that he needs to stop doing shit when in recovery. But he's so stubborn and has me acting like his mom.

I don't like bickering with him so I hope he let's me take care of him as much as I'm able even with my symptoms 😫.

[abovenorbelowne1]

I found myself ruminating on our current political environment amidst the upcoming presidential elections. Including but not limited to the whirlwind of events that have happened since Trump took office, throughout our fight of an epidemic, then tracing my “thought finger” to the end of the line ending at present. It has been packed full of chaos and almost too much for one to digest.

Then my mind began going back to the distant past, but further away from this bubble of mayhem.

I remember as a kid watching the hearing to impeach Clinton and witnessing everything which unfolded. In all bluntness, the president got impeached, yet not removed, for getting his dick sucked outside of matrimony. I can still hear his almost overzealous twang of an accent when he said the infamous words, “I did not have sexual relations with that woman!”

I began comparing what happened to Clinton to Trumps impeachment attempts during his presidency, along with all 30 charges sentenced then redacted after his term.

My thought bubble then furthered. Rights for people of color, sexual freedom, and gender have had such a longer struggle than the past decade in general. It spans back for far too long and although it is still present, has at least made steps forward to individual rights and freedoms. It has blossomed from the Salem Witch trials to persistent hazing of sorts. You gotta take some sort of win there, although not completely victorious and not currently absolved entirely.

During Clinton’s administration is when Ellen couldn’t come out as gay, AIDS was still prevalent and strong, inequalities still existed for women (actually the only group who was better then in a sense), and the disgusting treatment of people of color needs no explanation. We cared so much about someone’s gender, who one should be allowed to love, hate still tinged in the breaths and minds about the color of one’s skin. We had so much concern over morality and focused so eagerly on that compass that it repulses me to think about it all.

We cared so much about all of these things and impeached a president for sexual acts. What the actual fuck happened?

The pentagon admitted that UFO’s were real. The existence has been proven of evil corruption, lies, misleading and malicious manipulations of individuals, women’s rights were sent back in time, and most of this has been at the expense of not only just the minority groups but the majority of our society. It has cost us financially, mentally, and unfortunately many lives. Have the events in the last decade and what has lead up to them desensitized us so much that we are blind to truth? Our society fought so hard, in my opinion, for the most obscene and pathetic reasons in the past. But now we just let everything slide right on through and I couldn’t tell you where that compass which was so prevalent before even exists. It’s mind blowing to me comparing it all at once. The depravity of it all.

It makes me feel hopeless and sad. Why don’t we care anymore? I am not wishing for more rights to be reverted back to the past for certain groups by any means. I clearly don’t condone it whatsoever. However, we literally acted as the morality police which led to the impeachment of Clinton, but now are okay with letting someone get away with murder.

In the future, although I don’t wish to live it, I hope we can almost mock this era in text books when taking a step back to assess it all. I hope it still no longer exists and we haven’t turned into a version of the movie Idiocracy. However and unfortunately, I can’t fight giving myself over to despondency.

[raphexim]

Literally the only Gosling film I'd ever seen before Barbie was Remember the Titans like 25 years ago.

Jesus that makes me feel old. I am. Christ.

(it's only 23 years? That's... not better)

Working my way through belatedly so imma just use this post to keep track of thoughts and feelings

The Gray Man: fucking loved it so much??? Murder weapon turned unwilling father figure??? Sad grumpy dads are my one trope to rule them all, particularly when bound with found family. I'd wanna play checkers with Six. Like the characters were super compelling to me, the way they showed development and how everything felt character driven to me? And there were such good unspoken implications that also expanded on these characters without burdening the storytelling. AND the lack of gore!!!! This was a super violent movie and it only got a PG-13 because you literally don't need to show that shit on a screen. Bless

The Nice Guys: I expected to be aced out by the whole porno thing, but it was more nudity with implications than *the do* and I guess that didn't cross the line for me. And honestly pretty mild at that. The plot has holes. So many holes. Russell Crowe's accent was distracting. And crazily, I didn't really care about any of that, because the characters and their dynamics and chemistry were just chef's kiss. I love Holland? And I love that he is a disaster. I would not like him in person. There is a little gore at the end, but if you consider physics, it's not realistic at all (crazy how you can convey a visual without having to emotionally scar your audience, who knew???). This is the only one I have re-watched so far, and now have the book so that I can consume my comfort in multiple forms.

La La Land: idk. The music was good. Ryan walks some kind of way. I was VERY impressed with his piano skills. (I was raised by a pianist, so I have to notice that stuff, which makes me sound pretentious I'm so sorry). Idk what happened. I have no idea what the message was, or if there even was one. It seemed like it was trying to have one?? But like "you can either fall in love, follow your dreams, or be successful, but only two out of three. And if you get rid of one, you're guaranteed to get the others." Idk. Very meh, probably won't watch again except for specifically the piano playing.

Lars and the Real Girl: tbh my only context for this movie was an episode of Pushing Daisies where a delusional guy used his doll to murder someone, so. I did not have high expectations. Also had no idea RG had anything to do with it. *And* my tolerance level for secondhand embarrassment is on the fucking floor so I expected to have to turn it off. I didn't. Fuck. This movie was so wholesome???? The treatment of a mental illness was so supportive and positive??? (Except for the touch thing, that was... Let people not want to be touched!)

The Notebook: hi, I hated the Notebook. I don't get the hype, I don't know why people treat it like the ultimate romance. Man coerces a girl into a date by threatening to kill himself, she retaliates by publicly humiliating him. They scream at each other a lot. Poor communication. Obsessive behavior?? Literally so creepy??? Anyway they're terrible for each other and it's an unhealthy relationship. Ryan with brown eyes. Only rewatching if it's to roast and drink.

Half Nelson: made me uncomfy, but that was the point, right? It's a white savior movie but it's about being a white savior movie. The racial subtext of a white guy stepping in inappropriately and what the fallout of that is; stack on the nuance of addiction, male entitlement. How powerful of a moment for Drey to ask "will I end up like my brother" and Dan being the one to make her so. (Also the performance by Shareeka Epps? Spellbinding.) The writer who became a teacher and then never got around to writing? Real. So was the fact that nothing happened professionally after he did what he did to his coworker. Very pre-Me Too. Anthony Mackey was both the most charismatic and, somehow, most responsible character in the entire thing. My only actual beef is the camera work. This last bit is petty - they finally gave me a RG character with a cat, and the cat dies (but, very single white bachelor to name him Dave omg.)

Crazy, Stupid Love: uhhhhh the children involved in this were... this wasn't good. There could have been good lessons for them (the son with consent maybe??) (*not* depicting a teenage girl giving suggestive photos to a child???) but there weren't. There were good aspects in the story, don't get me wrong: exploring relationships, trying to find your identity outside of just 'who you're married to'. I get it. Everything that wasn't actively trying to teach a lesson was funny. The parts that were meant to be heartfelt, did not age well and also probably weren't great to begin with. Maybe that's the male gaze idk. I wanted more of Jacob and Cal's actual relationship, because what was being suggested between the lines was way more interesting to me than the actual plot. Jacob with the family/bonding with Cal's kids completely off-screen, are you kidding me? Cal being a really weird, awkward stand-in for Jacob's father? Jacob accidentally being written demi-romantic and having a crisis about it? I'd love someone to remake this movie. Preferably women-directed. [But I am obsessed with the second Jacob heard David's name and had zero hesitation, just ring off 'we doin this'. He's a real one.]

Can you tell I have feelings about overuse of sex and gore? Esp how it's been the last few years? Ugh. Like I want to watch Drive bc it sounds like it's supposed to be an ✨iconic✨ role for him but I get squicked out by chunks/organs and stuff and I have no idea how graphic it is. Can we go back to shit being implied, off screen, or at least artistic again???

I'm not tagging this, it's for me lmao

[sarah-dipitous]

Hellsite Nostalgia Tour 2023 Day 76

After School Special

"After School Special"

Plot Description: Sam and Dean investigate a haunting at one of their old high schools where we will see what school was like for the brothers back in 1997.

Would I Survive the First Five Minutes??: Okay, so it wasn't cool for this girl to be bullied, she didn't have to go and bully the girl who felt bad for her...and that could have probably prevented whatever ghost shit happening here from killing her (I don't think the second bullied girl would have killed her for it). I wouldn't have bullied the girl

I'm so excited to see high school Sam and Dean

How does this even work? Like, I know they HAVE to have schooling and it's not like John's gonna be around to home school them, but Sam just said that this is their third school this school year and it's only November. I just wanna know how all the records transfer and whatnot to allow them to move up grades and graduate

It's not glamorous, but Sam going in as part of the custodial staff is smart. No one is going to question him being any where at any time. And since this was all Sam's idea, I'm...hey. Hey, what happened to the gym teacher that they had this opening that Dean could get this quickly?? That it was this urgent to get a replacement?? I should stop questioning the internal logic of the show and focus on enjoying Dean enjoying getting to wear a fun little outfit

Okay. They just explained the real teacher's absence (she's getting married), but that still doesn't explain Dean

I can't watch this...his kid just shoved another kid's fist in a blender

The tracksuit is a good look for Dean...FUCK. STOP. You are like thirty years old, Dean (I won't even count the 40 years in Hell). Even as a joke, you shouldn't be this excited that "three of the cheerleaders are legal."

Okay but watching young Dean have to cover up his abandonment issues by boasting about the setup they have at the motel...it's the Christmas of 91 all over again

Oh, Sam, having to salt and burn the bones of his friend from his time at that school. The friend Sam helped after he got bullied, the one Sam protected from bullies...and Sam had no power or control over his life at 14, had no way of stopping the family from moving around as much as they did, but he still feels guilt over Barry's death

This teacher sees that Sam could be something other than a hunter mechanic. Okay, okay, but hold on again. So, John's cover up profession is a mechanic...how does that even work? Maybe it's just me, but mechanics usually stay in one place. People bring their vehicles TO THEM. Did John Winchester almost invent the traveling mechanic gig economy in the 80s???

Dean's watched Dead Poets Society? Doesn't seem like the kind of movie he'd like.

WHAT THE FUUUUUCK. Like. I knew it was too early for the ghost to ACTUALLY be Sam's friend (which means he salted and burned his friend's bones for nothing), but is the ghost the bully?? Is this one of those "school bullies are often people getting bullied at home" story lines? I know this episode is literally called After School Special, but that's a BIT on the nose, doncha think?

I don't wanna give this kid any credit or praise for this but Losechester......it's a little funny. Like, it's not funny to call a kid who's just doing the right and kind thing a loser, but strictly in the realm of name subversion making WINchester LOSEchester IS funny

OOF, SAMMY. Sucks that your nickname for Dirk (the Jerk) stuck after just one time. He wasn't being bullied at home, he had a different tragic backstory.

Look. I know it's for the good of everyone at that school, but it's awful that the Winchesters have to take away the one part of this old man's son, the one part of his family, he has left (a lock of hair).

I'm not saying that this kid didn't have a valid reason to come to hate Sam eventually, but I would not ONCE call Sam's treatment of him as bullying? Yes, the ripple effect of getting called Dirk the Jerk by some kid who'd been there for all of a couple weeks sucks, but let's not forget you were calling him Losechester and picking physical altercations all the time. Sam didn't wanna fight you, but if he didn't Dean was gonna absolutely fuck you up or "rip [your] lungs out."

DOES IT GET BETTER, SAM??? From what I can tell, it momentarily got better, but then your girlfriend died, your dad died, you died and Dean made a deal with a demon to get you back, then Dean died, now he's back but the apocalypse is coming.

"Been On My Mind...": Does 18 year old Dean making out with a girl in a janitor's closet count?? Why not? it's not like the countdown was at like 3. We can go back to 10 (oof. it was more than one girl............)