#i literally don't know why i keep picking at my socks

[irbcallmefynn]

I wish I had socks with wolf paws or something but I know me. I have a habit of picking at my socks literally at random. They'd get destroyed. So step one is figuring out how to break that habit without replacing it with something more destructive.

Maybe I need a fidget toy of some sort. Idk what kind I'd want, ideally something small and quiet. Like a 1x1 rubix cube or something.

[000-pawz]

princess treatment (bnd) ˚ · .

ot6 headcanons , fluff , just bonedo treating u like the princess u r!!! (gn reader)

rest of the members under the cut!

a/n: 2am brainrot takeover hi

sungho ˚ ⋆｡˚

𐙚₊˚ always pulls you into his lap whenever possible!!! loves having you close to him and it gives him an excuse to be a little possessive for a bit...><

𐙚₊˚ gives you random gifts and flowers just because he the smile you give him every time (and the thank you kisses too)!!! you'll wake up to a text from him saying "check your mailbox <3" and boom, there's a brand new necklace in there, all shiny and pretty...(he also asks you to wait to put it on so he can do it himself)

𐙚₊˚ puts on your socks and shoes for you!!! pecks your leg after pulling your socks up because duh.... you are royalty!!! even stops in the middle of the sidewalk to tie your shoes if your laces come undone

𐙚₊˚ cooks for you all the time!!! if you even slightly mention craving something, he's in that kitchen before you can even blink >< he lets you sit on the counter and feeds you little bites to taste test because you're his mini chef!!!

˚ ⋆｡˚ riwoo

𐙚₊˚ if you order something and you don't like it, he'll happily trade his food with you <333 he's content just seeing you eating well

𐙚₊˚ sings you to sleep and strokes your hair...and if you've been struggling with sleeping lately, he'll stay up with you until you fall asleep first so you don't get lonely :<

𐙚₊˚ if he sees something that reminds him of you at the store, trust that he'll be buying it in .3 seconds..."oh y/n would like this", "this is y/n's favorite color", "they were thinking about getting one of these"... like he's always thinking of you

𐙚₊˚ "i don't ever want you to be upset, darling. let's talk about this, okay?" like he's so serious about communication. he values your point of view and input over anything and makes sure you always feel seen and heard!!!

jaehyun ˚ ⋆｡˚

𐙚₊˚ opens every single door for you because why would his s/o ever have to touch a dirty door handle when he's literally right there???

𐙚₊˚ writes you lengthy handwritten notes and poems...sneaks them in your bag when you aren't looking or leaves them on your side table to wake up to <3

𐙚₊˚ surprises you with a bubble bath and tea when you get home from a stressful day...gives you a massage after and encourages you to vent to him so he can hold some of your burdens for you :((

𐙚₊˚ brags about you!!! he loves sharing your achievements with people, showing you off to everyone he knows because he's so proud of you and so so so lucky that you chose him <3

˚ ⋆｡˚ taesan

𐙚₊˚ your personal photographer!!! takes pics of you all the time, whether you ask him to or not (he prides himself in getting the perfect candids for your feed)

𐙚₊˚ notices the super small things... like oh you don't like tomatoes in your food so he picks them all out for you <3 and he knows you always carry chapstick in your bag, so he buys you a bunch so you never run out

𐙚₊˚ buys you so... many... clothes... you're sure more than half of your wardrobe is made up of taesan's contributions... it's not his fault you look good in everything!!! he just has to get everything for you so he can see you in it himself <3 (and mayyyybe show you off to everyone else)

𐙚₊˚ makes you personalized mixtapes and writes love songs about you!!! (for your ears only!!)

leehan ˚ ⋆｡˚

𐙚₊˚ "hey beautiful", "you're so gorgeous", "my pretty baby" and any other sappy compliment he can give you at every waking hour of the day

𐙚₊˚ chivalry is not dead for as long as leehan is around!!! he'll give you his coat if you're cold, walks on the outside of the curb to keep you safe, carries your purse/bag for you, pays for all your dates (even if you insist on splitting the bill), etc.

𐙚₊˚ he does all of the planning for trips and he's so intentional and thoughtful about everything so you never have anything to worry about other than being pretty and enjoying yourself <3

𐙚₊˚ loves giving you his clothes to wear like nothing makes him happier than seeing you in his big hoodies and t-shirts!!! he'll even take his hat off and place it on your head simply because "you look cuter with it" like he's so obsessed

˚ ⋆｡˚ woonhak

𐙚₊˚ #1 hype man!!! even if you aren't feeling too confident, he'll be showering you in compliments and praise because you're always beautiful to him, no matter what

𐙚₊˚ leaves you a bunch of texts throughout the day just to check in on you, sends you silly selfies, makes sure you've eaten, and if he asks you to recap your day to him, you better type 4 whole paragraphs about every single detail or he won't accept it ><

𐙚₊˚ posts you every. single. day. like it's actually crazy... you'll click on his Instagram story and boom, there's a cute picture of you picking flowers at the park with the caption 'they're the prettiest flower in the world' and it's so so so cheesy but it makes your heart flutter every single time

𐙚₊˚ shares your hobbies!!! if you're into crocheting, he will sit there for 3 hours making a blanket with you...or if you like to do makeup, he'll let you practice on him!!!

reblogs are greatly appreciated! thank u...<3

masterlist

[adore-laur]

GET OVER HERE

— i don’t know what the plot of this is 🫶

——

Your phone's default ringtone goes off from its place on the coffee table. Your eyes shoot up from the book you're reading, and you see Harry's name appear, along with your lock screen, which is a candid picture of both of you. After bookmarking the page you were engrossed in, you reach forward and slide your thumb across the screen to answer.

"What's up?" you say, holding the phone to your ear.

"C'mere," Harry murmurs lowly on the other end.

You screw your face up and absentmindedly pick at a loose thread on your pants. "Why?"

"Because I need to discuss something with you."

A scoffed laugh escapes your mouth. He's literally in the room next to you, getting ready for the show, so you ask, "Can't you just text me or tell me right now?"

He's comically silent before uttering an innocent, high-pitched "No?"

You sigh loudly and rise from the comfy couch. As you hang up, you leave the lounge and traverse down the hall. It takes precisely seven steps to reach his private dressing room. The door is wide open, with aromatic cologne and quiet melodies wafting through.

Harry is the first thing you see. He's sitting comfortably in a canvas chair with only a towel around his waist and socks on his feet. The counter in front of him is a mess with hair products, cosmetic brushes, and face creams scattered on the surface. His phone lies on his lap, which means he's been talking to you on speaker.

You clear your throat, which causes him to turn his head and look at you. "What did you need to discuss with me?"

He meekly smiles. "Hi."

"What do you want?" you rephrase impatiently, wanting to return to your romance book. It was just getting steamy!

"Come closer," he says, glancing you up and down.

You notice that he hasn't moved his hands away from his face. They both unnaturally cup his cheeks, and you can't figure out why.

"Why are your hands like that?" you ask with suspicion.

His eyebrows pinch together. "Like what?"

"You're being weird."

"You're being weird."

"We're not doing this," you say, pinching the bridge of your nose. "Tell me what you need, or else I'm walking away. I have a book to finish."

Harry keeps his hands on his face and curls his pinky finger to beckon you closer. "Get over here."

Your heart flutters when he says it in a way that implies you might be in trouble. You rack your brain for anything that could have led him to call you and have you come to his dressing room.

As you slowly walk to him, his eyes don't leave yours. When you stand in front of him, his legs spread in invitation, and he says, "On my lap, baby."

You do as he commands and sit on his left thigh. One of his hands moves from his face to rest on your waist, while the other stays put. He hasn't put his rings on yet, so his fingers feel bizarrely bare on your skin.

"What?" you whisper, your gaze curiously dancing over his face.

Harry leans back in his chair. "Wanna know why I'm covering my cheek?"

"Yeah. I've asked that already."

"Don't get sassy with me."

You swallow nervously. "Did you cut yourself while shaving?" you guess, knowing it's happened a few times before.

"Nope," he replies, tapping his fingers against his cheekbone. "Try again."

You purse your lips and ponder. "Hmm… do you have a zit?"

Harry runs his tongue across his teeth, obviously not amused. "You're on a roll today, aren't you?"

"Just tell me," you breathe out as your shoulders slump.

"You," he says while jerking the leg that you sit on, "gave me a hickey the other day. Right on my jaw, where everyone can see."

You roll your lips in to try to hide your smile. "I'm so sorry."

Harry removes his hand, revealing a brownish-red mark on his jawbone from when the both of you were in a hotel suite in Tacoma. It's a known rule not to leave marks, especially since it's common for him to be photographed in the cities he visits. You take all the blame. You couldn't help it, really—it's nice to be a little greedy sometimes.

"Now I have to tell my makeup artist to cover it up," he mutters, his hand squeezing your ankle. "I have to come up with a stupid excuse and tell them that I punched myself or something."

You laugh. "That's a terrible excuse."

He tilts his head to the side and gives you a blank stare. "Oh, is it? Then would the culprit be so kind as to help me out?"

"Just say, I don't know, that you got hit by something thrown on stage."

Harry blinks three times before saying, "That's actually a really good idea. Okay, you can leave now. Your work here is done. Discussion over."

You lean closer and whisper, "Where's my reward?"

He gives your ass a salacious squeeze. "Meet me in our suite tonight after the show. Better be on your best behavior."

——

[ipostwhatiwant1202]

What They Text You: Applies to any...cause they're all a bunch of dorky teens and i dont care what anyone says.

Leo:

• look at my new plant

• would you like to have tea tomorrow?

• you look so pretty 😍 leo you cant see me and? i bet you do

• am i really an old man???? ����😭😭

• be honest, do you think raph can beat me in an arm wrestle? if you dont answer in 5 minutes, i will assume it's yes and i will prove you wrong.

• good morning honey. have a wonderful day today! ❤️

• are you still mad at me...? LEO YOU SET MY MICROWAVE ON FIRE. so is that a yes?

• have you eaten yet? you need to eat...and drink something other than (your favorite drink)

• i got benched because i can't stop throwing up. i'm fine! leo...you threw up blood literally 10 minutes ago. it was only a little 🙄

• i'm in desperate need of a kiss right now.

• check out my new katanas

• remember that i love you 🥰🥰❤️

• for the last time, i wont download tik tok. you know how bad i hyperfixate 😠

• stop playing candy crush and pay attention to me

• keep it up and you won't get the knots worked out of your shoulders.

• mikey just called me a boomer...i feel like i should be offended. you are a boomer. I DONT KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.

• y/n, i love you, but for the love of god, PLEASE PICK UP YOUR SOCKS.

• *drunk* im in a relationship why do i have your name as my love cause my girl/boyfriend/partner will definitely not like that and i dont know who you are but they will kick your ass and i dont even feel sorry cause you arent love leo...you're drunk. NO IM TAKEN

• call me cause i would like to hear about your day and i miss you

• i love you my love ❤️

Raph:

• come watch me bench im bored

• can you please come get mikey before i hit him?

• wear that giant sweatshirt to our date. ya look adorable in it

• why did you ask donnie to help you with your homework?? um...cause it's about neurons and receptors in the brain. i could've helped with google! 😒

• YOU NEED TO COME KILL THIS COCKROACH RIGHT NOW.

• hey babe. how was your day? ❤️

• have i ever told you how beautiful you are? what did you do. nothing...? i just think you're beautiful. raphael. fine..i broke casey's nose. AGAIN!?!

• i'm so tired...wanna come nap with me?

• facetime me so i can show you this cool trick spike can do

• remember how i said i was going to be more level headed? well donnie's new robot almost broke my arm and it's no more. you lasted 1 day more than the last time.

• *you sent a selfie* yeahhhh that's my baby 😍😍

• eat or im fighting you.

• jokes on you ive always been completely unhinged and it's bold of you to think i cant be worse.

• im sick. can you bring me some soup? 😣

• i miss you like a lot and i hate when you're gone

• i love you a whole lot 😘

• im just gonna start carrying you everywhere if you dont stop tripping over NOTHING. im just gonna trip harder. Y/N NO.

• mikey said we're his parents just an fyi. he's always been my son

• i made waffles. you better come eat some

• damn babe you're fine 🤤

Donnie:

• no i wont do your homework for you

• tell shelldon to stop talking back to me before i ground him for eternity

• im in a house of IDIOTS. technically it's a lair. not now y/n.

• you look like a pile of swans in that sweater 🥰

• i can't sleep. wanna play online scrabble?

• sweetie you need to eat more than a bag of gummy worms and a bag of doritos

• you need to come sit with me while i work because i need an extra set of eyes. you just miss me 😏 don't start.

• don't call a plumber! i know how to fix the sink. i got this 😎 donnie the pipe exploded the last time you "had" this.

• *you sent a selfie* you look nice

• im gonna blow up. a person, a thing, a place, all of the above? yes.

• you need to drink straight broth, it'll help soothe your stomach ache

• im dying. you have a cold.

• i love you but please stop trying to assemble ikea furniture on your own.

• good luck on your exams/work project! 😘

• TELL RAPH TO STOP PICKING ME UP TO MOVE ME.

• leo just called me an asparagus. i didn't know how to respond so his phone will self destuct in 5 minutes. DONNIE.

• you're so pretty 🥺

• i made you something and you have to come get it right now. im literally about to have my wisdom teeth out. reschedule it

• listen to the playlist i made you or else im disabling your pirated tv show service

• thanks for listening to me 💜

Mikey:

• babe come snuggle with me

• i made you brownies so come eat them with me while we watch crognard

• i haven't seen you in so long 😭 you saw me this morning. BUT THAT WAS HOURS AGO

• angelcakessssss i love you

• look at this cat video i found

• FACETIME ME THERES A PUPPY

• are you awake? mikey it's 3 am. good, so would you still love me if i was a worm? go to sleep.

• i bet you look like a cuddly bear today 🥰

• im so hungry. can you bring me ice cream?

• raph wont stop being mean to me. can you beat him up? cause a (your height) tall human can beat a 6ft turtle's ass 😑 i believe in you.

• im coming over with my new call of duty game and we're having a game a thon!

• i found a cat. mikey no. his name is gerald. MIKEY WE ALREADY HAVE 10 OF THEM. HALF ARE NAMED GERALD.

• i made you a mixtape i cant wait for you to hear it

• how mad would you be if i crashed the shell razor in a derby and broke my arm? very. then i did not do that.

• im sick. come help me feel better 😭

• call me cause april just told me something about casey that's wild

• i found this cool rock that i think you'll like

• it's so cool i can date you. you're for real the coolest. you broke my coffee table again didn't you? no...maybe.

• im bringing you lunch cause my baby needs to eat!

• this song reminds me of you 💕

[incorrectbatfam]

Tim and Jason headcanons 👀

One morning during breakfast Tim keeps excusing himself to go to the bathroom to fix his boxers because they must've stretched in the wash. Meanwhile, Jason can barely move and waddles into the kitchen like he has a rubber band around his legs. Imagine the horror when they connect the dots and realize their underwear got swapped

One day Tim's room suddenly starts to smell like tomatoes and he tears it apart trying to find the source. Turns out Jason put soup in the humidifier

Jason: *gives Tim an iced coffee*

Tim: "You put salt in it"

Jason: "No I didn't"

Tim: "I can literally see the crystals"

Jason: "What crystals?"

Tim: "Right there, all settled at the bottom"

Jason: "That's how the coffee is"

Tim still owes Jason for the time Jason stopped him from faceplanting in Alfred the cat's litter box

Contrary to how it appears, Jason's hair is thicker. It's so thick that Tim accidentally drops a glob of mayonnaise in it and Jason doesn't notice until he combs his hair hours later

They get bunk beds on a mission. Tim gets the top bunk after losing rock-paper-scissors. While he's asleep, Jason moves the ladder to the other side

Jason puts a cockroach on Tim's desk thinking he'll freak out. Tim, who's on his third day without sleep, looks Jason dead in the eye and eats it

As a kid, Jason often re-wore dirty clothes until he absolutely had to go to the laundromat meanwhile Tim washed his more frequently in small batches so he wouldn't get told off for having a huge pile. Cut to the present day where Tim's sifting through a mountain of Jason's laundry for a pair of socks and Jason is offering zero help whatsoever

They stand out in the rain to see who gets drenched first. It's usually Tim—he absorbs water like a paper towel. Jason then gets in trouble because Tim could've gotten sick ("Thanks, Bruce, not like I'm soaked to the bone too")

And when Tim gets sick, he refuses to take his meds unless someone sneaks it into his food. Finally, Jason has a use for the NyQuil Chicken TikTok

Jason drives three hours from an out-of-state safehouse to hide in Tim's closet and scare him. Little does he know, Tim is in the closet at the safehouse, waiting to pounce on Jason

Jason peels a pride sticker off a villain's car and gives it to Tim

Jason mixes all the Goldfish crackers into a dough and bakes them into a single giant Goldfish. Why? 'Cause he can, and Tim needs something to test his new food pic filters on

In March their patrols end by meeting at McDonald's for Shamrock Shakes

Tim prank calls Jason and convinces him he's lost in Metropolis. Eight hours, countless Bizarro flights, and two unfortunate geese encounters later, Jason storms into the Batcave while Tim simply grins and asks, "What'd you think of my new VPN?"

Tim and Jason find a wheelbarrow at a crime scene and keep it after the case is closed because it's a free wheelbarrow. This happens twice more and now they have enough for a family wheelbarrow race

Bruce makes them spend more time together, so Jason decides to teach Tim the Three-Card Monty. Tim just nods along because he doesn't know how say that he already learned it by watching the second Robin out-con a conman

Jason wakes Tim up one morning by chucking a feather duster at him, saying Alfred wants everything clean. So Tim gathers all the dust in his room and dumps it on Jason's bed before going back to sleep

The Ferris wheel has a clear "no food" policy but Tim doesn't listen and sneaks a chili dog anyway. Jason's in the seat below him, and it's the second time something falls in his hair without him noticing

Jason: "Red Robin, do you read me?"

Tim: "Affirmative. What do you need?"

Jason: "Pick a different gargoyle. That one's mine"

Tim: "I don't see your name on it"

Jason: "Check the underside"

Tim: "It just says Robin, so technically it's both of ours"

At one of Jason's safehouses there's a mysterious bucket in the corner of the living room. No one but Tim knows what it's for

[anon-sect]

Picture source: Internet

story requested by @axeegliter

Ever since Charlie Puth got his big break on The Ellen DeGeneres Show back in 2011, Jace, Pete and Andy became huge fans of the singer. They all loved his music. All three roommates could be heard by their neighbors playing his songs very loud through the walls. The one thing they all have wanted to do was to meet the guy in person. After following is singing and songwriting career, they decided to make it happen one day.

One opportunity finally presented itself for all three of them to me the famous singer in person. Andy had heard that Charlie was attending a friend's party. Since it was a private party, there was no way for them to get in, but Pete had an idea that just might work. They would sneak in as servers for the party. Once they were inside, they would ditch the outfits and blend in with the rest of the attendees of the party. It was carefully throughout plan. At some point during the party, they would get to chat with the singer and maybe take a picture with him.

On the day of the private party, everything went initially according to plan. All three were in their server outfits and blended in with the rest of the hired servers. When the head guy asked about them, they told him they were extras that were sent to him to help out. Seeing so many at the party, the head guy appreciated whoever sent them. He had liked the extra help.

When the time was right, Pete, Jace and Andy went to quick change into something else. The plan was to meet the singer, take a quick photo and leave before anyone suspected anything.

Everything almost went according to plan. Before they could get close enough to speak to Charlie, the head guy had two other servers round them up. He had verified that they weren't apart of his crew and was about to escort them off the premises. It was at that moment that Charlie heard the commotion and came over to see what was going on.

Pete, Andy and Jace explained why they were there. The head guy was highly upset that they tried to crash a private party, but Charlie calmed him down. He told him there was solution to help all involved. He had the head guy keep them at that location till he came back. Charlie returned holding an old looking cell phone device.

Charlie pointed the camera at Andy and hit the flash button. Andy vanished to be replaced with a Nike sock. Pete and Jace were shocked. They began to plead to let them go after seeing Andy turned into a literal sock. "You see guys, this is how I deal with crazy fans that don't know boundaries. I grant them their wishes while giving me something useful at the same time. I have shirts, pants, shoes and socks that were former fans. Now, they get to be with me forever and I get durable clothing and footwear items. It's a win-win in my opinion." Charlie spoke as the hit the flash button at Pete. Jace saw that Pete was now just a sock. Jace wondered if it was permanent. Charlie just laughed as he flashed him, reducing him to a pair of underwear on the floor. He picked up the pair of socks and underwear. The material felt good in his hands. He could only imagine how his new socks would fee on feet. Yet, he remembered he has several pairs of human-transformed socks in his sock drawer. This pair will be just like the others he already collected since becoming famous. HIs fans make excellent clothing and footwear, while fulfilling their dreams.

Charlie went to the bathroom to change out into his new pair of underwear and socks. It was no time like the present to get these fans use to their new existence as objects he now owns.

Andy didn't expect the singer to literally turn him into an article of clothing, let alone a literal sock. He felt Charlie's foot enter his hollowed-out body and fit snuggly on his foot. He could taste the saltiness of the singer's foot and smell a slight odor coming from it. A few wiggling of the toes showed him who was now in charge. He mentally pleaded for Charlie to let him go, but have no means to vocalize his plea, there was no way to call out for any kind of help. Bearing the full weight on his now sock body had every nerve ending on fire. Somehow, he retained his senses, just with greater intensity. It was torture being worn on foot.

Pete was not fond of feet much, not unless it was really clean and nice smelling feet. Even then he bearly tolerated being close to feet. This new existence was a complete nightmare. He was literally being worn on feet. He was disgusted at tasting the singer's feet without any choice or free will. The odor wasn't bad yet, but still smelling it was bad enough. Being crushed under Charlie's feet was the most intense pain he had ever felt. The fact that being walked on made the intensity almost hundred times worse. Fresh pain with each step the guy took.

Jace was wishing for death the moment he was securely fit around the singer's waist. He knew exactly what he had been turned into the moment he saw Charlie's dick directly in his face. Since his face was facing inward in his new form. this would be his only view for the rest of his life. Hearing that they would never see his humanity ever again, made him want to cry. He had a life, a really good life. Being stuck as another man's underwear was no life at all. He couldn't move to show his frustration about being clothing and he couldn't speak to call out for help. He and his friends were completely at Charlie's mercy.

Charlie put his old sock and underwear back in his car and went back to join his friend's party. Only one person knew about what he did to those three fans, and he promised he wouldn't say a word about it since they were party crashers anyway. The guy thought they got what they deserved. He partially agreed on that point, but crazy fans who don't know boundaries do make good clothing items. Some might like being his possessions and some he was sure were probably hating their new life. Honestly, he ceases to care what they felt or even if they were liking their new existence the moment he turns them into objects. Once changed, they are treated as what they now look like. Every transformed article of clothing gets treated the same no matter what.

[yuri-is-online]

Popping in with another Tokyo Debunker theory, so sorry you have to deal with me but I literally have nowhere else to go with this ;;;

This theory really is more of a shot in the dark on vibes alone but I just saw the Janitor in ch3 and idk if it's same face syndrome but I felt he looked strangely similar to Dante? I don't know if it's just me, but anyways, for some reason I feel like he's the Ed that Rui keeps talking about (accidentally killing) and was wondering what if he's the one Alan killed and not Dante? Maybe Alan mistook him in the heat of the moment, could explain why he wasn't dead since Rui's dialogue implies they're able to bring him back to life somehow. There really isn't enough info on this but couldn't help but think about it.

Also how is Haru such a mom to the anomalous creatures and yet so shady at the same time (casually putting trackers on Ren? Picking locks? Hello??) and seeing that I have to agree I do think he might've transferred from Sinostra, it'd be a way to connect Jabberwock to the next arc possibly too

My dearest friend, I am not "putting up with you" I am receiving your lovely thoughts and adding some of my own. You can come here and chat, we can keep filling up the Tokyo Debunker tag together. I do apologize to my twsties though, I promise I am not abandoning you.

Rui seems fully convinced that his curse will kill anyone who touches him, especially MC but he is much more casual about how he talks about "Ed" to the point I am almost curious if he is talking about a person or a dog. I lean towards person because he complains about him leaving his socks everywhere and not him constantly stealing his, but him being the janitor is a good guess. Now as for Alan having mistaken him for Dante:

While they do look similar to me personally it is closer to the similarity between Hyde and Sho than it is them being identical:

Who are of course related, so it could just be that Dante and the Janitor are also related. It would add to the friendship between Dante and Hyde if they both have brothers enrolled in the school, Hyde really seems proud of Sho and clearly has bragged to Dante a lot. It would be funny if he does that because Dante is in the same boat. What I personally think is that, based off of the Janitor's hair color and cut, he is likely the dorm captain of Obscuary as pictured here in the loading screen:

The dorm leader has lighter tips to his hair just like the janitor and is familiar/comfortable enough to talk casually with Haru who is another dorm captain. If that's true then I do not think Alan, who would be very familiar with Ed, would have mistaken him for Dante. We also need to consider that Dante is in a wheelchair, I don't think someone who tries as hard to be respectful and accommodating as Alan would mix up someone who can walk and someone who is in a wheelchair, unless that is something new for Dante this year and he was able to function without it last year σ(￣、￣=)

When Haru declared lock picking as one of his special talents I almost died laughing he is SO SKETCHY. He is also trying to run a business, something that Sinostra also does and since Hyde is the advisor for both dorms I think transferring between them would be relatively easier than say, transferring from Hotarubi or Frostheim. Come to think of it both cases of transfers we have seen so far have been (potentially anyway, we don't have confirmation about Haru yet) between dorms who have the same advisor. Something that could explain why it seems easier in Tokyo Debunker than in Twisted Wonderland.

Oh back to Ed/the Janitor for a moment. Obscuary seems to be themed around death, and seems to run a bar that might be themed around vampires? Or just super goth in general. Either way I think his ability to come back to life might have something to do with his stigma and the way it interacts with Rui's curse, but we don't know enough about him to make a specific call just yet. I'll keep my eye out for more information and you are more than free to come here and talk about more of your theories, my anon friend.

[bearratic]

Get to know the mun ! repost, don’t reblog.

——— BASICS.

NICK[NAME] : Benjamin. [Benji/Bear.]

PRONOUNS : He/Him.

ZODIAC SIGN : Aquarius - Feb 7th.

TAKEN OR SINGLE : Single.

ANYTHING ELSE? : Real fuckn dutch. Made of stroopwafels.

——— THREE SERIOUS FACTS.

Writing gives me the time and space to gather my thoughts. I use it as a practice in conveying emotion, which makes it easier to do so and thoroughly explain reasoning. I use writing as a base for learning human psyche, soul, mind and spirit which interests me deeply. I try digging deeper into feelings and actions - reasons why some are done and linking them together.

I pick muses based on some hint of personality trait I see of myself in them. I find myself often asking what I want so having muses that at least correlate to my thoughts are a better fit for me than just a choice at random. It can be big as the way they think or it can be as small as sharing a favorite drink. Exploring their interests based on their world and adding on to it makes it way more enjoyable for me to write, story and world building is important to me.

I fucking love everyone I have ever written and will ever write with. This has been nothing but a warm and loving experience for me.

——— THREE RANDOM FACTS.

My nickname is thanks to my father, who even though he named me one thing, found it often too long and switched it to another lol.

I go to at least 3 concerts every month. Mostly rock in genre if I get to chose but I never say no when friends ask. I will always be your +1 to any event.

If I had to pick a country to move to it would be Scotland, sorry but I have a light obsession with that place.

——— EXPERIENCE.

Zero dude. Literally none. I just picked it up as a hobby and passed my blogs one year birthday last august. I have been truly active in the writing community for only half a year in total.

I go with the flow, I enjoy coming up with things on the spot. Diseccting my muses and throwing them into any type of situation just to write myself out of it. Or-... make it worse for them. Keep it interesting you know?

I write through and together with music, I let it guide me often. This is kind of the reason I am a slow replier, I have to really feel what I want to put down and then I can stick to it. Besides that, English is not my first language so I have to switch back and forth in my brain real often. It can be a bit tiring but I gladly do it for my writing partners. Much love.

——— MUSE PREFERENCE.

Give me anything with a background we can explore and me and my muses are in. I thoroughly enjoy talking to you about your muses and mine, from their favorite pairs of socks to their family drama, idc I want to know.

I need a lot of building together, plotting and anything to truly write my muse closer to yours if you want anything deeper. I build through writing together. From something silly to movie scripts. Let them get to know each other to their deepest point.

——— FLUFF / ANGST / SMUT.

FLUFF : Yeah definitely, I’m a sappy dude. I like to daydream.

ANGST : Also yeah! I enjoy making problems for my muses, it makes me understand them more. Dread is and can be intense so be sure to be in the right headspace and let me know.

SMUT : Sure, though with my lack of writing experience bear with me on this one. I really have to know how you write and your muse for this to work, I do not wish to overstep boundaries either yours, your muses or my own. Which I am unable to know if we do not at least have a talk about it.

——— PLOT / MEMES : Thanks to you I know how much I enjoy plotting. I know I'm rather slow with DM replies but please don't take it personally I am just truly busy and can only do one thing atta time. Memes! Starters! Send me them all day everyday, I might not get to them immediately but I will and I will love it.

TAGGED BY : @sanctissimx I adore. Thank Yououou.

TAGGING : Cool ppl but no pressure. @cherriedrage @penandswords @patronsxints @carminewill @heterochromatica @ofcursedenergy @modeinthemiddle @huntershowl & You.

[atxxzist]

broken | c.s (08)

prev // next // series m.list

pairing: choi san x reader

word count: 7.7k

warning: i don't want to spoil the contents so pls go in with a guarded mind and stop reading immediately if anything makes you uncomfortable!!!

"lotte world! oh, and, we can finally visit cheonggyecheon!" mingi preaches excitedly from the other line, adding onto the ongoing list of never-ending things to do for the summer.

"yeah yeah, that sounds fun," you mumble, voice coming off disinterested because you've been circulating the small space of your room for the last five minutes looking for the only hair tie you have left.

you swear you had put it next to the nightstand.

"are you like not excited? we're gonna be free bitches for an entire summer!" his tone filled with disbelief, a scoff that accompanies it after.

"no, no. i am. just--ah!" you find the last survivor of the collection of hair ties on the floor just right next to your bed, picking it up to twirl it around your finger.

"are you literally having this conversation with me mid-orgasm?"

"pfft!" you blow, standing up on your toes to grab the comb on the bed before walking to the mirror on yuna's side of the room that has really come in handy. "i was looking for a hair tie to do my hair."

"oh, and what for? on this weekend after the semester ended and you have no work for the entire summer, huh?" his irritating and nosy voice vibrates the sheet of your bed where your phone is also at, you having to roll your eyes at the remark.

"so i can come up to your room and beat the living shit out of you for always sticking your nose in my business."

"ooohh!" he sings with exaggerated fear. "is this your way of saying you're gonna get laid tonight? a little end of the semester celebration? has the city finally changed you?"

"no," you answer, snapping your hair into a half ponytail before walking over to pick up your phone. "i'm gonna visit the cafe like a peasant. now before you make me late, create a google doc or something and i'll add to the list when i have something."

"fine. but we're doing it in comic sans, color-coded!"

you roll your eyes, muttering a "whatever" before cutting the line.

you catch yourself in yuna's mirror again after turning, and you honestly don't know why you're all this dressed up either. you've been to the place plenty of times before and you've definitely been there with yeosang as well.

the amount of coincidences still following you allowed for a run-in with him just the day before, having told him with eager lips about the exam score you got, later with an anticipated gaze about how this is going to work.

you suppose the cafe being the place of choice isn't a surprise.

he gets there before you, his hand that raises slightly when he sees you enter. it's a smaller table located in the center, and you begin making way to it, your sneakers gliding against the flooring.

"hey," you both exchange as you take the seat across him, a short lapse of silence after that is broken by him.

"want to order something?" he asks, eyes boring into yours.

"sure." you nod.

after picking your drinks and food of choice, yeosang offering to go up to the register, the silence reenters when he takes his seat. your gaze that tries to avoid his and his that tries to stir away from keeping them trained on you too long. he thinks you look nice.

in the half ponytail, white crop top tucked under a pink cardigan and sneakers with socks. he don't think he's ever seen in a skirt before, but it suits you. and if that's makeup you have on, he's not sure he's able to tell. you look about the same.

"so..." he starts again.

you shyly look up at him, clearing your throat before replying with the same aloofness of "so..." a quick second of nothing before you two burst into laughter at the ridiculousness of the situation, your leg lightly brushing his under the table.

"sorry," he mumbles, a smile on his face.

"me too," you say, "just... still trying to get used to it."

still trying to get used to the new feeling when you're around him; one that's not so hostile but actually very welcoming and new--one you haven't gotten from anyone else but mingi and yunho.

he chuckles lightly and nod, the feeling being very much mutual after all.

"well, i'm glad you passed," he brings up, digging for anything to talk about and break the tension a little.

"yeah. it wasn't easy."

"but you did it. maybe you really do have it in you." his tone very lighthearted.

you brush it off with a scoff.

"not really. i just couldn't wait to be done with the damn semester so i'll never have to attend another session of that class."

he laughs a deep chuckle and you have to dismiss how smooth it sounds to ears; how comforting and familiar it's starting to become.

"geez, only first semester and you're already getting beat down? come on, you still have a semester and three more years."

"gosh, don't even remind me." you cross your arms and fall back onto the chair, yeosang releasing another laughter at the pure distaste in your voice at the topic.

"you don't look and sound like you enjoy the major very much. why not change it?"

something in you light up at that. change your major? you actually haven't thought of that, but the more the idea lingers, the more you question why you haven't thought of that.

it's a lesson learned that just because you're a little more techy than your friends since your parents practically neglected you (so you had to seek out any other source of entertainment), it doesn't mean you were destined to work in the field of technology or whatever. simply only having basic surface knowledge won't cut it.

it took a semester (maybe less) for you to come to terms with that. but better now than later.

"well, even if i change it, i wouldn't even know what to."

"you can always just take the core classes first and then decide after."

you hum out a low note and actually consider the possibility for a few seconds, until the person behind the counter calls yeosang's name and you're interrupted, watching as he stands to head to the front, you being slow to get up and follow behind him in case he needs help.

the entirety of you being here the past couple of months and you honestly didn't even know they served other smaller dishes like tteokbokki and even snacks you'd usually find at street food stalls.

but it's nice. just like this. you and yeosang sharing a drink and snack while carrying on small conversations that gets easier as the time pass. there's no pressure to please or entertain him, and he doesn't seem like he expects any. like he's doing all of this because he wants to, and you can't help but to let a small drop of tear prick your lower lash in hope he won't notice.

because you're not very used to anyone besides your friends, let alone a guy, who does something for you if not for his own benefit. you made that mistake not once, but twice.

not sure if you're even deserving of someone like yeosang who's been the victim of your lows and outbursts, but now the one to conjure up a rare, foreign feeling that brings out a small smile that settles on your lips.

yeosang sees the somewhat conflicted, hard-to-read expression on your face when he looks up from his food, asking in a quiet, concerned voice, "you okay?"

you chuckle lowly, a light clog in your throat and nod.

"i'm good."

~

"so, earlier, you mentioned possibly opting out of the current major but having no idea what you want to do after," yeosang is the first to speak as soon as you both leave the place, the orange tone painting the sky once again.

"yeah..." you reply.

"maybe think about other hobbies, or well... what do you like to do? what are you good at?"

you ponder the question; think back to your early teen years spent helping your aunt around the house, getting dragged into mingi's and yunho's shenanigans, play stupid pranks on one another and beat them at the occasional games when you paid mingi visits--and wow, what the fuck do you even like to do? what are you good at?

you don't even excel at anything specific, too, like yuna in art, or yeosang with computers. it's awful, the sinking realization that you are nothing special.

"i write? a little bit?" you answer, not the slightest confident in the answer. because who are you kidding. you're no hongjoong and you can barely even string a coherent sentence together.

you're not even consistent, unable to recall the last time you wrote in the journal, and it was started for all the wrong reasons.

yeosang nod, the both of your footsteps in sync.

"you can start there, then," he attempts, able to read the tone about just how unsure you are.

the air goes hushed and you fidget a little in spot before raising your voice again. "i don't know. i don't even think i'm good at it, and it's only been recent that i started writing. plus, it's not even like a story or whatever. i only write in a journal and honestly, i'm not even sure what the hell i've been writing."

he snickers, finding something so amusing about it. you shoot daggers at him.

"what?"

"you said you only started recently so of course you're not gonna be great. it takes time and efforts to perfect a craft. if you like it, there's no reason for you to not consider it at least."

he continues, "take the next semester or even year to think about it. i'm sure you'll figure something out."

you scoff, even pout. that still takes time, too--kang yeosang actually sounding reasonable and like he doesn't hate your guts.

"i think i like it better when you just insult me and go on your day."

he laughs and shakes his head, your gaze lingering on the curve of his lips longer than you should. you think he has a really nice pretty smile.

"but we're way past that point now, right?" his voice raising in pitch as to exaggerate the overall friendliness.

"right," you reply, same energy and all, until it hits you again. "oh!"

he seems taken aback by the high volume and snaps to you, curiosity in his reaction.

"that thing we agreed on," you say, a little too excited for your own good, yeosang's chest deflating with disappointment in return that puts a frown on your lips.

"oh come now, you weren't hoping i would forget?"

he shrugs and keep his gaze ahead, muttering back in such a nonchalant tone, "that might've been the idea."

you frown even more, whipping your head around and letting yeosang take the next couple of steps by himself before attention landing on the bench facing the street just a few feet away.

you're fast to jog up and swoop him away by the arm, using it to drag his entire body until it plops down onto the bench with you, his doe eyes staring back, and it's only until then that you realize you're still holding on.

"sorry," you mumble, releasing the captive arm as it slips down to hit the empty space between you two.

"you're good," he assures, and even that sounds awkward, too. a short silence that hangs before you clear your throat and revert the topic back, even daring to scoot yourself a little closer. since you guys are kind of friends now, right?

"what i was saying was... are you ready to tell me now?"

he turns the other way to scoff. "oh, you really want to know, huh?"

"well..." you trail off your tongue, letting the word roll around long enough till continuing on, "you kind of promised me."

"well..." he mimics the way you did it, "technically--"

"--oh," you cut in, your voice full of that playfulness that is strange in the presence of yeosang. "or are you a coward?"

"tsk!" he dismiss, trying to bite back a snicker that wants out because you're being a bit over-the-top right now... in a somewhat endearing way, that is. so eager to hear about his story that he kind of loosely pledged to tell only after you fulfill the 'deal'.

not that he ever doubted you would do well; he just didn't think you'd actually be so passionate about the entire bargain, it even being the first thing to be brought up when he ran into you outside the dorm building.

"me? coward? never," he brushes off, a smug but lighthearted act that brings a giggle from you.

"okay, then... tell me." you perk up, lips curled and eyes blinking his direction, way too thrilled for this.

his gaze drop to your lips for a second and he has to detach immediately, shaking the thought off.

"it's just... i don't know." he tries laughing it off. "you're going to think it's stupid."

you squint, tilting your head and frowning.

"why would it be stupid? i mean, i'm not sure what it's gonna be about, but i'll listen. whether you think it's stupid or not."

but judging from how he's acting, it looks like it might be something more personal than you initially thought; now starting to feel the tiniest bit of guilt for bothering him so much about it.

“maybe we can compromise with something else,” you offer an alternative but he rejects with a shake of his head.

"i'll tell you. just--you don't make fun of me or anything."

you chuckle. "i won't."

it goes quiet as yeosang prep himself up and try to muster how to start such a tragic tale. he thinks it's tragic, at least on his end. he's never shared it with anyone before; only those who were once close to him knew.

and for some reason, he feels an odd sense of trust in you. enough for you to be the first person that he's considered actually opening up to, regarding the topic.

"well," he starts, your full attention already on the first word. "i grew up in a small neighborhood; everyone knowing everyone kind of thing."

you nod, even humming quietly to let him know he's good to go on.

"so you know, like... there wasn't a lot of other kids my age and it was hard to make friends. but a girl, a year older than me... we became friends or something, you could say."

and if the way your eyes swell doesn't give away how immersed you already are, you don't know what will. because you hadn't expect kang yeosang's 'sob story' as he said it, would be about a girl.

"and this is going to be cliche as hell, but indeed i was in love with her. for the longest time."

he has removed his gaze from yours a long time ago, settling to watch the busy cars maneuvering through the streets instead. as if the retelling of this story is something to be embarrassed of. but you would beg to differ.

"i grew up with her, went through a ton of shit with her--meaning i also watched her fall in love with so many guys. maybe it wasn't love, i don't fucking know. we were young and stupid. but i sure hell did wanted to be one of them."

he takes a short breather before going on, "and it came true. i was one of them. well, or i thought i was. beginning of my junior year, she, for some reason, finally gave me a chance. oh... i was so happy... the day we became 'official'. i can't even recall any other time i was happier."

"and it's stupid because, thinking back, it was obvious she only did it out of pity. and maybe that's not a good enough reason to hate her; heck, i even started feeling bad for a moment just thinking back because i was such a fucking simp and probably annoyed the living hell out of her. but what i do hate her for, is for completely ghosting me."

"i could give less shit about the fact that i only found out she broke up with me through a mutual, or that only a month after, she started going out with a friend who'd always talk the maddest shit about her and why we shouldn't be together. no. it's the fact i never got any closure. paid her family a visit and was told she left for seoul literally the day before. no notice. no nothing. not even a 'fuck you, don't you ever come into my life again'. and maybe i don't deserve a closure, i wasn't much better by any means. but i sure can be bitter about it, and i guess here's me being bitter."

he finally turns to you, taking in your expression and feeling like he has to clarify some points.

"i didn't come to seoul in hope of sweeping her by her feet again or whatever. i just wanted to get away from the old city and kind of just... i don't know, try to find myself?"

you nod in acknowledgement. "no, i totally understand. i'm sorry to hear, though. but it really does sound like she had a big impact on you."

yeosang chuckles dryly in return; a smaller, somewhat sad smile gracing his lips after.

"i wish i could say you're wrong, and i wish i would mean it when i say i hate her. but like i said before, i can't recall any other time i was happier. in some ways, she made me a better person. it's complicated. i feel like i'm contradicting myself at this point."

your snicker directed at the last comment, assuring him with a shake of your head.

"you're good. but honestly, i never would've pegged you for someone romantic."

a scoff is what leaves him; you raising a brow in turn of what he's going to say.

"i'm not romantic. just realistic, i think. if i were to open my heart to someone, i'd want them to treasure it; to do the same back. which is why i am a lot more wary nowadays. i'd want to get to know that person really well first."

but you definitely still think he's a little bit of a romantic, he might not even realize it.

"because there's a different kind of pain that comes from loving someone who's out of your reach."

the amusement on you drops, the corners of your mouth falling downward at such a statement that if you mope about it long enough, you will see just how awfully relatable it is. but clasping it shut for a few seconds too long, all you say is, "fair enough."

"yeah... but anyways. that's my story. now it's your turn."

you glare at him through the pinched brows and wrinkles on your forehead.

"i don't remember that being apart of the deal."

"oh, forget the deal!" he waves off. "let's just talk. give me something tragic."

tragic? where would you even start with that? you think the entirety of your life has been a series of unfortunate, tragic events one after another; beginning with your parents, then your aunt and uncle, your ex-boyfriend, and now even a boy who managed to fool you with his charm and handsome look.

"my first and only boyfriend cheated on me."

yeosang is taken by surprise, his facial like a deer caught in headlight, whether at how fast you answered, or at what you just said. but you just figured, you might as well offer your own tale of a failed relationship, if that will make him feel any better.

"oh..." his delivery is muted, as if still trying to recover from shock, you have to laugh off the stone expression on his face; act like the revealed fact didn't bother you all that much.

you speak again, "i wasn't in love with him, though. i don't think i was. i only gave him a chance because he liked me and i felt compelled to say yes when he asked me out."

"so... you did it out of pity?"

it's like he got you there, your attention batting to the streets in shame. you're starting to sound like the girl in yeosang's story; who, maybe, went out with a boy not because she liked him, but for another reason.

except, in your story, he was the one who had hurt you. said in your face you deserved whatever happened, and though you didn't love him, it did hurt. it still hurts. because it was another person you couldn't get to stay; another proof that possibly, you're just not meant to be loved.

"you know..." instead of answering his previous question, you divert the subject, because at the same time, maybe you can comfort him as well with what you're about to say. "you reminded me of him a lot at first."

his features twist, not amused in the slightest, and you don't blame him. why wouldn't he be offended being compared to your cheating ex?

"he was very blunt and sarcastic," you add on, "if he didn't like me doing something, he was gonna let me know. and you were just... you didn't have any filter at all."

whether it's guilt or embarrassment on yeosang's face, you're not able to tell. but implying he's an asshole is not your intention.

"but the more i got to know you and spent time with you, i realized i was very wrong. you're nothing like him. not even in the slightest."

he goes from being puzzled to the smallest of light that starts reflecting in his eyes at the genuine compliment that leaves you.

"i questioned for the longest time how mingi and yunho could ever like you, but i'm starting to get it now, i think. it's because you're a great friend. you do so many things for yunho simply just because he's a friend."

you don't even notice a smile has crept to your lips, but yeosang catches it and return an even bigger one, his heart folding in a way that is so pure and innocent because of your gesture.

"well, thanks. i am feeling very flattered right now," he finally says, and your giggle echoes faintly.

"just being honest," you respond. "so that's my lesson learned: that it's hard to judge someone based on first encounter, impression, or anything of that matter."

because the boy who you thought would be the bane of your existence turned out to be a wonderful surprise. on the other hand, the one person you used to look at through a rose-coloured glass and with heart eyes, turned out to be just one of the many things on the list that keep you awake at night thinking to yourself why you're not enough.

san is sprawled on the couch, tired and ready to go to bed by the time there's a knock at his door, a bit dazed when he opens it to reveal a rather composed wooyoung with his hands buried inside the pockets of his jacket.

he wonders what his friend's doing here; at this time and in an outfit that doesn't look like it's for a regular event.

"here to use the bathroom," wooyoung clarifies, inviting himself in and not bothering to hear san's response considering the amount of times the boy himself used wooyoung's place to fulfill his own needs.

san doesn't say anything and only shut the door behind him, heading back to the position he was in before.

"we're going out tonight," wooyoung announces, stopping in front of the bathroom to turn to his friend; san snapping to him at the call. "an end of the semester nightout with a couple other people from campus. you thinking of coming along?"

"nah. think i'll sit this one out."

"alright," wooyoung mumble, disappearing into the other room.

san usually isn't one to reject an invitation like that, but just yesterday, the day before, and the days before that one, all he'd been doing is going to parties, getting drunk, and doing the one thing he came to those parties for.

it can start getting repetitive; even for someone like him.

"just to let you know, you're almost out of toilet papers."

wooyoung slams the door shut and begins making way to the front; san watching his movements carefully until wooyoung just stops midway, but he's already moving back to the tv screen at that point.

wooyoung debates for a moment whether he should tell san what he saw earlier. it's probably a bad idea knowing how his friend is and the extent he goes to when he has to have something, or when it doesn't go his way.

but realistically speaking, san's never gave a shit about any of the girls he messed or messes with. wooyoung picked that up through a lengthy history of constantly trying to rile him up by name dropping and mentioning any of the girls san saw and sees, in hope of one day finding a weak spot.

because san is a good friend... to wooyoung. but he's always had a problem with the way san views the world; love, relationship, women.

he also has a problem with the fact san never listens to him. everything in one ear and out the other. he didn't listen when wooyoung told him the girl he was fucking had a boyfriend and he was gonna get his ass beat (which he didn't, unfortunately, because san has a gift for getting out of trouble), so there's a very big chance he didn't listen either when wooyoung told him to leave you alone.

and really, above all, wooyoung is just petty. and because he is petty, he will take the opportunity to just annoy him, even if san doesn't give a shit.

"by the way, i saw y/n," he discloses nonchalantly, and the speed at which san twisted his neck to look at him would have wooyoung believing this is all a very vivid dream.

"where?" san asks, the tone very standard at first like it's just the littlest bit curious.

"near the cafe a couple blocks from the dorms. we passed it earlier. she was with someone. yeosang? i think that's his name."

the clockwork in san's mind starts as he tries to recall who this fucking yeosang guy is. name sounds familiar but nothing's clicking.

"the one we went out to dinner with last time," wooyoung adds, and that's when the light bulb goes off.

“sit down, sit down!” wooyoung hustles, pushing san down onto the seat, yeosang scooting to the wall to make space.

wooyoung plops himself down at the end, fidgeting in his spot.

“this is yeosang,” he starts; the two boys next to each other exchanging a small head bow.

"i think they might be a thing now. she looked really happy."

wooyoung's talking out of his ass, saying whatever just for the heck of it. you for sure looked happy, though. you conversed with yeosang with a smile on your face the entire time.

you guys being a 'thing' might be a bit over-the-top but it doesn't hurt anyone to exaggerate a little. san never cared so why would he now?

but wooyoung doesn't take notice of the way san's body tenses up and his grip on the arm of the couch gets tighter, wooyoung's mind completely elsewhere, focus on getting out now that he's done all he wanted to do.

"alright, well, i'm gonna head out now before i piss the other guys off."

and he's gone, leaving san to digest the new information as something churns in his stomach and his knuckles clenches. because now, it's starting to make sense.

the sudden silence from you and the unanswered message. you never even read his text from two days ago. it's all because you're too busy with yeosang.

he can still recall the small and subtle glances you guys would sometime exchange during dinner; the way your eyes would shoot to him, and he would try to cover the hidden laughter that wanted out because you did something endearing.

and san typically doesn't mull over the girls he hooks up with; who they slept with before or will sleep with after him. because most of them know what they're getting into. they don't expect anything from him after and he doesn't expect anything from them, either.

but over the course of seeing you, he's taken a rather big liking to you above any others. because out of all his conquests, you're the one who's always willing to go above and beyond for him.

you have feelings for him that are more than just simply fulfilling a need--you actually like him.

and in typical san fashion, because he's selfish, he uses that knowledge to hang over your head, knowing whatever he does, you're going to put up with it.

so how is he suppose to feel now, that you of all people is ignoring him, with someone else right by your doorstep ready to take his place.

well, it definitely doesn't feel good.

a fit of rage, jealousy, and possessiveness overtakes him completely, and before he knows it, he's up and with his car keys dangling around his finger. he has to talk to you.

even if he's on the verge of passing out right now and tired out of his mind. even if paying you a visit is quite possibly going to be the worst thing he can ever do to you.

"wait, so with that being established, could that mean you were being cautious around me because you were afraid of falling for me?" you tease yeosang through the elevator ride.

the chemistry has been so natural, the rest of the night spent in comfortable conversations that were full of sparks, and you have never felt so safe in the presence of anyone before.

he snickers. "oh would you let it go. i told you that like... an hour ago."

you return a giggle of your own, yeosang continuing on, "but i might've been a bit of an asshole to a couple other girls. maybe."

you roll your eyes playfully, at the same time stepping out of the elevator when the door open, about to make another remark when you catch a figure from the corner of your eye. standing in front of your room, head down and attention glued to his phone screen.

he finally looks up at the sound of the commotion, and you merely gasp in place when that familiar feeling of butterflies swoop your stomach at the sight of none other than san.

what the hell is he doing here? again.

you and yeosang are frozen in place, his questioning gaze lasering san's that stiffens upon seeing yeosang by your side, looking so in place and comfortable; that fit of rage, jealousy, and possessiveness making a comeback with even more vengeance.

silence consumes the thick air, you breaking it by shifting just enough so you're able to whisper to yeosang; thank him for making sure you arrive safely, and that he's good to return.

yeosang shoots san one last glance, the boy giving him all kinds of wrong signs, but it's also not his place to meddle. he nods and tells you a goodnight, shuffling his feet back into the elevator and you watch until the door closes on him.

now, it's just you and the person who has given you nothing but pain, showing up once again when you experience even an ounce of joy.

you walk to the door of your room with careful steps, stopping in front of him, everything about your body language is nervous and in defense mode, thinking that this is it.

this is where you cut off everything with him; the kisses, sex, months of being in each other's arms--this is where it will all end. you will tell him you no longer want anything to do with him because you can't agree to his conditions.

you're not made for a casual relationship without any budding feelings. it's just not who you are; therefore, you and him are not compatible.

"hey..." he's the one to start speaking, "i'm sorry i haven't been reaching out, i was--"

"--it's fine," you cut, not wanting to hear any more lies from him. the fact he doesn't even recall showing up drunk is enough to convince you there's no need to hear him out at all.

"oh," he simply says, and it's the most awkward silence after of you just standing there and he thinking of what else to say.

"i know you're probably upset, but--"

"--it's fine, san. i-i don't care anymore."

anymore. san thinks over the word more than he should, and the longer he lingers on it, the more he find himself hating everything about your tone and attitude.

but he's always been quite shameless, always testing the situation even if he feels a shitstorm coming.

"can i come in? for a little bit?"

come in. you know what that means, and how it will always end. you'll like to believe you're way past that now.

with a heavy sigh and striving a few steps forward, you pull out your key.

"i'm really tired." you unlock the frame, pushing it just slightly open. "i think it's best if you leave." your palms against it, slowly creeping yourself in; your voice unwelcoming because you're hoping he will get the hint and leave you the heck alone.

"and... i-i don't think we should see each other again after--"

your breath is whisked away, it all happening so fast. one second you were still in the hallway and the next, you're pushed into the room along with san shoving himself in, his grip around both your wrists and backing you into the wall.

"--all because of that fucking guy, right?" he taunts, a look on him so terrifying, you have never seen san angry like this before.

"what are you talking about?" you push him back by his chest, honestly amazed at the amount of sheer strength you hold when being cornered.

but that just might've been a mistake; he's able to catch his steps before stumbling completely and pins both his hands to the wall with a bang, trapping you inbetween his arms and hungry gaze.

you flinch a little.

"yeosang. the one that came with you. are you seeing him?"

your eyes squint--perplexed, only able to think, what about yeosang? and why of all times, now is when he's deciding to give a shit.

he's never cared about anything regarding you--what you do or who you hang out with--always leaving when he wants to, never bothering to call or text if not for his own benefits, and now he shows up (not drunk) after almost a month of silence to interrogate you against your will, shoving himself into your safe space like an intruder.

"and why does it matter whether i am or i'm not. you said it yourself, san... that we are just friends. i never even asked about any of the girls you see."

some of the rage on san's face dissipates, replaced by the conflict that runs through him--how and when you got this confident to even talk back when you were so tight-lipped the last time he saw you.

and it's true. you guys are just friends, and even friends doesn't sound right. it honestly is a very generous term actually, considering the extent of the relationship.

so yes, he doesn't have the rights to be concerned about who you're with or what you do with them. but again, he's selfish; maybe even rotten to the core. the thoughts of you ever being with someone else never proving to be a threat. not even jongho who really was just a nuisance.

but now, the threat is very much real, and he doesn't like it one bit.

he was the one who touched you first, claimed you first--so in terms, you belong to him. not yeosang or any other fucking guys. him.

and he's going to make sure you know that.

disregarding the veins practically popping on his forehead, you just want to establish a point at this rate, talking in your thin voice, "after this, i really do think it's best if we stop--"

his lips is on yours before you can finish the sentence. before you can make it known once and for all that you do not want to see him again after this.

despite his amazing sex drive and ability to make you cum, san isn't much of a tongue kisser. rarely, actually. but by how his tongue is moving against your protesting lips, you'd think this is his favorite thing in the world.

you're the one to break the kiss, pushing him back and trying to catch your breath after. it's when you see that familiar smirk on him that the fear creeps in to form a knot that travels down your throat.

"you were saying?" he cocks his head, so smug about the power he still has over you, so evident as it's displayed right in front of his face in all its glory.

but you haven't lost, yet. you still have the time to get rid of him and show that the effect he had on you is no more.

you clear your throat and straighten your posture, putting on an act of bravery.

"i said it's best if we stop seeing each other after this. our agreement or whatever it was, i don't want it anymore."

the smirk only widens, san honestly amused you still have some restraint.

"oh, really?"

an eyebrow is raised on him before you feel the cold sensation of his fingers crawling up one of your legs, slowly traveling to under your skirt.

you gulp.

"then stop me." he leans in to whisper, his breath felt on the tip of your skin, ghosting and sending a shiver down your spine--that sudden but recognizable itch in between your legs again begins coming into bloom--one that is truly going to be your downfall, you can already feel it.

"s-stop, san," you mutter with eyes glued on him. you don't even sound like you mean it; like you even want him to stop at all. and he knows; he knew.

that no matter how hard you fight, all he has to do is try just a little harder and you will fold.

he chuckles, whether at how cute you look or at your words, his hand stops in place and squeezes at your thigh, drawing closer and whispering in your ear using that deep tone that makes you shutter in excitement.

"do you really want me to?"

he pulls away after, face merely inches away and your gaze skips to his lips for a moment; lips that are on yours the next and comfortably taking you in this time because there's no more act or pretense that you don't want him.

because he still conjures up butterflies and still make you feel that something that is so unique only when in the proximity of him.

you still miss him when you know you shouldn't, and the taste of his lips still feels like home even though it's now only a forbidden flavor that serves as a reminder that in the end, you will be your own worst enemy.

your arms rest around his shoulders the way they usually do, replying back to the kiss and trying to meet his pace; at the same time, his fingers edging closer to the shorts under your skirt, stopping when he reaches the top, breaking away from the kiss to laser you a glare.

he scans your outfit swiftly before looking up again; something displeased already blossoming on his expression.

"did you wear this for yeosang?" the way he's able to flip flop emotions almost too scary, now currently showing the same frightening and much more menacing side once before that sparked fear in you.

you're about to answer but he cuts you off with a brief "fuck it." going back to resume the kiss that is a lot sloppier than the previous one, his lips moving against yours in frustration like he's trying to convey something.

you don't get a second to catch your breath when he abruptly swoops you from the behind--your arms still around his shoulders for support--and throws you down onto your bed, your back sinking into the sheet momentarily.

he situates himself and traps both your legs between his, and you think it's just going to be like any other times you both had sex.

he's probably going to eat you out or make you suck his cock, but san surprises you when he grabs your arm and flip you around just like that--your face right into the pillow.

the sound of his belt unbuckling is after, and you turn to look over your shoulder.

"san..." you call out, but he continues to leave you in astonishment when he hisses back instead.

"shut up."

he tosses the belt, and from the way it hits the wall on yuna's side before dropping to the floor means there was some force put into it.

"just... just shut up." and his cock is next, freeing itself from his pants.

it's when you feel the shorts underneath ripped from your skin, the cold air gushing right past it, that you release what sounds like a mixture of a gasp along with a moan.

he pushes your legs apart and scoots in, focus on the sight of your bare pussy that still needs some lubrication.

spitting on his fingers, you can only let your head fall onto the pillow as solace when he rubs over your entrance in preparation before inserting two digits in, a quiet groan escaping at the sensation you haven't felt in a while.

"look at you so fucking wet already, and you said you don't want to see me anymore." he chuckles a sinister, mocking laughter, bunching your skirt up to where he can see everything, gripping your hips firmly to line up with his hard-on.

"but truth is, you'll always come back for this cock."

the laughter intensifies and so does the knot in your stomach, barely able to get out, "d-do you have a cond--" before a curse leaves your mouth.

your eyes shut and you immediately grip at the sheet when he inserts his length in without any notice. without a fucking condom.

and san has never had sex without a condom before, but his jealousy has taken over completely, currently only focus on making sure you know you belong to him.

only he can fuck you like this and only he can feel your pussy as it hug around his length so nicely like it's made just for his cock.

his nails dig at your hips and you have to muffle the oncoming screams by burying your face into the pillow, san fucking you through the high at such an intense pace, you may never want to go back to slow and steady sex ever again.

"what were you doing with yeosang?" he asks through the grunts and lost breath.

lifting your head up to look over your shoulder again, you try forming an answer in hardship of the pleasure coursing your system.

"we were--oh fuck," you curse at that spot being hit so perfectly, "we were just hanging out."

he snaps into you a little harder at that, the hold you have on the sheet tightening.

"will you stop seeing him?" he asks again, his pace slowing down as he awaits your response.

"i-i don't know," you answer honestly, since you're actually starting to warm up to yeosang and he's nice to be around.

san's facial twists in red though you can't see it clearly because he's fucking you too good right now.

"i said," he almost growl, "will you stop seeing him?" picking up his speed again and nails digging even further into your flesh as he practically slams your cunt with the harsh thrusts.

"y-yes!" you give in, defeated instantly at the overwhelming sensation and pit that's starting to form. "i'll stop seeing him!" your face falling back into the pillow once more, the sheet in your grip, and only able to cry sounds of pleasure the rest of the session as he pounds into you over and over again.

you come hard and wet, unable to recall a time you ever came like this. san fucks you a few more time while you try catching your breath and pulls out.

there's no need for him to cum. he already accomplished exactly what he wanted.

"now that wasn't so hard, was it?" you feel the shift of his body weight as he stands on his knees again, and you're still panting with the side of your face stuck to the poor pillow.

it's when that high from what just happened is starting to die out and another feeling so familiar consisting of guilt and shame settles in again.

the commotion of san getting off the bed to go look for his belt competely ignored, you only staring into space at yuna's side of the room already imagining what mingi's and yunho's reactions will be like.

you have broken a promise. you went against your friends, and all for a boy who doesn't even like you.

a boy, who, will leave in the next few minutes; tell you he has somewhere to be, and will lie to you all over again the way he always does.

but before the end of the night, choi san surprises you just one more time.

he doesn't leave.

instead, he walks to where you're lying down and places a peck to your cheek that has you picking your head up to look at him.

he gives you that soft, handsome smile that shows those dimples you love dearly, and offers a hand.

"want to do something together?"

next // series m.list

taglist: @sorryimananti-romantic @revehosh @cookiechristie @avantalem @atiny68 @belletiny @shibera @mochibabycakes @justineasian @eastleighsblog @baguette-atiny @crimson-mia @yeosxxx @m4rsluv @sleepychimm @atz-diary @diorwoo @naiify @becauseiloveyunho @damagelove @softie00 @s-nsanshine @atinytinaa @moonseonghwa @lemontreefantasy @wooyoung4eva @yeosangsbiceps @likexaxdaydream @knucklesdeepmingi @barbielibra @tmtxtf @brown88 @harusoraa @frankenstein852 @yujispinkhair @mermaid17venus @nolxverlikeme

[ghostofasecretary]

feelings sorting

how am i feeling? stressed. numb. overwhelmed. bad.

how does my body feel? floaty, cold, stiff. the floating started *after* i took my emergency anxiety meds, which is. annoying.

ok. put on socks and a jacket; that might start to help.

i haven't watered my plants in three weeks. been longer since i vacuumed, also.

haven't sent an email i need to send or a texted someone back.

i am so, so--i feel like i've just failed and failed and failed, and not just in a general "not getting what i wanted at the times i wanted it" way but in a daily "i haven't been eating food or giving myself tea or keeping my promises to myself that i would *do things to make my life better*" way.

ok. watered the plants.

i keep thinking "i want to give up" and i don't know what i mean by that. what do you mean, you want to give up? i mean i'm tired of picking myself up off the ground over and over again at both literal and metaphorical expense to fling myself at things that don't love me back. i mean i want to go to grad school but i DON'T want to tell my recommenders "haha yeah i got into [extremely prestigious institution] but didn't go because i'm too poor to afford it and too unimpressive to win the lottery that still calls itself merit-based." i mean i don't understand why i'm so tired all the time, and why doing the things i love scares me, and why studying is so hard, and why applying myself is so hard, and i keep sitting still for hours and hours and days and days and my whole WEEK went by and i hardly NOTICED because each day was the same. more or less. somehow.

Thursday feels like it didn't happen.

i don't want to skip poetry this week but i didn't prepare a single thing i was meant to and there's no point to it if i haven't prepared because i don't have the vocab i need to do this shit casually and anyways i'm past the point of doing stuff casually, i'm better at this than i used to be, i'm meant to be better

i'm so tired of myself.

backing out is easy, right? it's meant to be easy? "Hey, So sorry but I didn't make time for this thing that makes my life feel worthwhile this week, this passion project I've spent years on, the thing I feel like actually makes me interesting and knowledgeable enough to justify being a dumbass in other areas"--wow, it's nice to speak freely

i can tell i'm being crazy. i don't care. not saying it will only make me more crazy and less productive/capable of getting what i want/trapped in a cycle of Avoidance for things that Feel Bad.

my jaw's tense, my mouth's burnt, my throat is dry. drink some water. write an email.

i have, in fact, been pretty damn diligent about pursuing my goals for years. let's just--fucking--a bad month does not ruin you. a bad day does not ruin you. it's embarassing not to be prepared! it feels bad! i don't like it! nevertheless if i had the resources to be prepared i would be, and as i am not it is fair to assume i lack the resources, and my priority should be *getting* said resources so i don't *explode and die.* as it were.

placing this much weight upon my academics, on *not looking stupid,* is also very embarassing, but to be cringe is to be human and i'm stuck with myself.

listen. babe. do you think you can do poetry today? no. okay. that's fine. go communicate that like an adult.

(if i'd been that diligent wouldn't it have worked? if i'd been that diligent wouldn't i fucking have my goddamn life in order right now? ...does everyone you know who's worked hard have their just desserts for it, babe? does ANYONE? ask any of your mentors who are winning and they'll tell you it's at least half luck. privilege matters, your work matters, your character matters, and also sometimes people luck out and sometimes they don't.)

god this is excruciating.

EMAIL SENT.

i'm gonna resume this in a bit, i think, but i don't want to lost this so i'm gonna post it

ok. back at it. person texted.

i think the anxiety meds were a good call. talking to myself in public was also a good call. i wish i'd done this earlier but there's many things i might wish different and so instead i'll just be glad to be alive and moving.

i need to eat. and i need to start my grad school apps and email my recommenders politely, with respect and decency, without tearing myself down. firstly because tearing yourself down in front of others puts them in an uncomfortable position, and secondly because if you don't speak of yourself with respect you are doing an unkindness unto yourself.

oh, and i got an email about Job Onboarding. yay. (i have a job now btw, Go Me. that's not nothing. that was a significant source of stress for months and tackling it took a week, two on the outside, and soon i'll be making money and socializing more which is good for the monkey brain and improving my baseline levels of stress.)

plan:

- go to the bathroom oh my god

- eat + do dishes

- ~~account set-up~~

- schedule other job stuff

- vacuum the second half of the room

- grad school list; make/re-activate accounts; make spreadsheet of required docs and list of people to email

- make + eat dinner

- i would LIKE to a) catch up on my cards, b) Knit, and c) listen to my audiobook. and i'd like to do these things on purpose for fun. go me. let's try. if you don't get through all of Grad School List that's okay but PLEASE start in on it

(previously in q: what's up with mystery package from hell (figure out commute during lunch, change list if needed) (actually i do not care) (sent email, no response))

head hurty. back and body aches. how about i make some tea before i finish vacuuming.

update: i did not finish tea before vacuuming. i did not even start tea. things are Off The Floor which is good, but On My Bed which is less good. need to put the vacuum up also. blargh.

mystery mail situation is resolved thanks to the power of emails! huzzah.

3 hours 40 minutes after taking my anxiety meds i feel, uh, A Big Headache. tired in a drained way. i have a few things on my list left (*start* grad school shenanigizing, put up vacuum, make tea, make food (is banana bread + yogurt + fruit + seeds an adequate dinner, who knows not me. probably not given what else i've eaten lately. hush), eat food, Do Relaxation). i feel i have been more effective than i have been at improving my circumstances. i've been meaning to vacuum for actual weeks, and i managed to reorganize my bookshelf and put up some new books that have been languishing on the floor for two weeks in the process. i went through some very annoying job stuff that furthers my goal of making, like, Any Money At All this month! cancelling poetry today was fine actually. all my conversations with people were positive. i am kind of pleased with myself.

i think i may try some grad school bullshit now and THEN do upstairs taskz and then have a chill evening. maybe i will even vidya game, who knows. okay? okay!

evening update: i love approaching baking like it's cooking. instead of using a real recipe i used my two old bananas + 2 remaining carrots + bread like ingredients in quantities approximately similar in ratio and measure both to about three other recipes. it'll be a bit before i know how it tastes as it needs to cool but i'm quite pleased by the appearance, at least!

[bamboobrat]

succession s4 e5 recap: swedish elon and his logan roy tribute band

time is a flat circle and we are back to ken hyping himself listening to rap, driving to the office.

anyone feeling nostalgic yet?

he is immediately caught off guard by the fact that roman and shiv are already there.

also he seems like the worst boss ever.

i really don't like ken when he is not hitting rock bottom.

(there is a movie about a sleeping robot in a cave that takes up too much time in this episode. let's not get into all that)

the old guard checks up on the CE-bros before their trip to norway.

matchy matchy&lt;3

turns out mattson wants them all there (why wouldn't he?) so THE GANG IS GOING TO NORWAY! lets bleed the swede!*

*as a norwegian, i approve this message

mortality has set into team krank, as they put on compression socks before the flight.

krank is not here to have fun. krank has no young mistress to impress. krank is serious.

shiv has noticed ken's leaks to the media from last week because she is boss. it's the comeback we've been waiting for.

but most importantly, she is waging a very important war against tom and his stupid new sneakers:

the sibs say they can kill tom for her. that's brotherly love.

hugo is not having a good time.

i am tho.

gerri rallies the troops by shitting on europeans.

yes mommy tell me i'm weak because i have free healthcare! sit on my face

gerri for CEO. always.

they accurately depict what it is like driving in norway:

(this is why i don't have my licence)

the gang arrives in the motherland and it's beautiful, but rainy (so authentic) and are all like WHY THESE WOOD CABINS SO SMALL?!

ironic because jeremy lives in fucking denmark.

anyway, whatever this is:

I DO NOT APPROVE!

the trip up to mount olympus is interrupted by con saying he can send a picture of their dead dad to the group chat.

nobody wants to see it.

also, marcia is putting logan in a kilt like the fucking bay city rollers and con had to cancel a room full of working class whites in cleveland. the sacrifice.

they give con carte blanche for the whole funeral thing, which is probably a terrible decision.

the funeral is going to be one big campaign rally, i'm serious.

the others have to settle for a nice lil scandi brunch spread. what a hard life.

i don't say this often, but i would be hugo in this scenario, piling onto my plate like it's nobody's business.

karolina has a cute lesbian moment.

she says something in swedish at some point, but let me tell you, i understand swedish and i didn't even pick up on it. no shade to dag, but lol.

hugo doesn't understand how ski jumping works.

i thank the writers for putting this joke in there, even if literally no one other than random scandi people will get it.

it's like the opposite of danny boyle's the beach<3 give back to the community<3

roman enters negotiations and puts his fingers in the caviar.

you think i didn't notice? after all this time, you must know i notice everything.

the CE-bros make the village elders proud, as mattson offers 187 per share as long as he gets ATN.

also, gerri does a second take looking back at roman. these are the crumbs i am destined to live on, i guess. roman doesn't want to give up ATN tho, probably because 1) his dad wanted ATN 2) his dad told him he wouldn't make it at pierce and belongs at ATN 3) he is, somehow, the most rational of the siblings right now????

speaking of rational: how are we feeling about the shiv/mattson potential here? i honestly have zero objections.

shiv is like fuck yeah, sell ATN, that shit is toxic.

agreed, but who gave mencken an open line to ATN-meetings? sounds like something logan told cyd to do during one of those late night calls.

"even dad had a line" rings true zero percent. pass.

get rid of atn. word is, they don't even have tucker carlson anymore? just keep a sweater, much less racist.

we get some important leo dicap representation:

and greg is the bringer of all that is exposition, telling us there is a kill list with 8 to 9 names, ever evolving.

now, as most readers of these recaps would know, i would like to avoid spending any time on greg whatsoever (made even more poignant by the recent rumors about nick), however, this must be one of the best exchanges of dialogue ever made:

greg: da fam shiv: da fuck

that's all.

tom tells the swedes that americans don't care about the rest of the world and it's funny because it's true.

and alex being like "you're ALL related?!"

i see you, succession writers, i see you.

mattson calls waystar a parts shop and has a good take on right wing media:

"i dont think news for angry, old men works"

instead, he opts for bloomberg grey: simple, cheap, huge, ikea'd to fuck. i do love ikea.

he calls the sibs a tribute band which is harsh. even for a scandi, it's fucking harsh.

anyway, SAUNA! SAUNA! SAUNA!

GERRI. IN. SAUNA! (chant with me)

i will never forget what the succession writers took from me.

krank out here just chilling.

i've never shipped anyone more.

we are introduced to ebba. i can tell i'd have more to say on this in any other situation, but it just feels weird (all norwegian know each other, i guess).

anyone else here for the shiv/mattson dynamic?

i'm sorry, i kind of ship it????

ken wants to tank the deal and roman immediately calls him out on his destructive bullshit:

and then immediately caves.

"i think we are good at running the ship" they say after doing it for approximately 24 hours.

i wish i had their confidence.

also, pinky can't dance, according to ken, so they keep shiv out. meanwhile, she gets cozy with lukas, who asks her about her marriage (bad) and tells her he sends liters of blood to ebba (also bad).

shiv shows us why she is paid the big bucks for political advice:

we don't see the end of their night, so i'm just going to assume they fucked. because she's worth it.

also, talking up gerri and karolina? girlies stick together<3

big bi vibes here. huge. idc if she's pregnant and drinking.

meanwhile, the CE-bros use greg to leak that the negotiations are souring. why would you trust greg with anything?

in an attempt to fuck the deal, the CE-bros show a terrible film to the swedish team, as if being scandi doesn't mean you've sat through enough terrible cinema already....

we get the strangest fight in tv history:

lol @ us for thinking this was an important moment for the two of them and then it's a fight about white sneakers and fat earlobes.

i sure hope shiv fucked lukas.

roman receives a photo of his dead dad and it doesn't really put him in the right place to negotiate with mattson:

ouch.

leave it to kieran to make an emmy-worthy speech across from alex skarsgaard peeing.

the plan was: tank the deal, but in a subtle way. what they did: try and tank the deal, but in a not very subtle way. did the deal tank: no.

i hope you understand.

the question is, if a deal collapses in the woods and no one hears it, is it a SEC violation?

mattson ends up offering 192 per share. karl jizzes his pants.

shiv gives the little spelunker tom a lil treat, telling him to fire cyd.

then she asks him out?

and ignores him again because she is taking a call from mattson?

idk my dudes, but i'm into this shiv comeback.

mattson seems happy and flirty and i sure as shit hope this goes somewhere.

as long as it doesn't involve liters of frozen blood.

i have a feeling it will be all good vibes until he learns about her pregnancy. there's always something rotten in the state of denmark (or norway, or sweden, but it's all the same).

the waystar-team receives the kill list after the offer and it's very stressful for a few people who made themselves suffer through a session in the sauna:

not on the kill list: karolina gerri tom because shiv fucking did the thing!!

oh, and karl and frank are on the kill list, but i think they are just fine.

maybe the real treasure was the compression socks we made along the way.

[llatimeria]

why are upstairs neighbors the way they are. i know this is long but can somebody please . please read this and give me a reality check

the last few people who rented the apartment above us were annoying too but it pales in comparison to whoever lives there now. Every single fucking day, usually in the evenings or late afternoons, they do ... Something. it could be sex or some kind of exercise or any other number of things. It's just a lot of THUD THUD THUD THUD THUDs on and off for half an hour to an hour and a half. Today it started at 8pm and lasted til 9 but the last time I made a note of the time it happened around 3pm as I was trying to do homework.

It feels like the whole ceiling shakes. I swear sometimes it fucks with the air pressure in my ears, which is really hard to notice until it's driving me insane, like a grain of sand in my sock. It's started to stress out our dog, which just makes her start barking (and she's clearly barking at the ceiling), but her barking is in itself overstimulating, which stresses us out more, which she picks up on, which just makes her bark more because she's baby and doesn't like it when her dads are anxious.

The thudding alone can be enough to overstimulate us, but combined with the barking and coincidental other neighbor noises that don't usually bother us, it's... Extremely draining. We're both neurodivergent people with PTSD. Loud, unpredictable noises don't really mix well with us. On more than one occasion my partner's had full blown anxiety attacks bc of the combination of sudden loud noises (a known trigger for them) and the overstimulation (another known trigger for them). We like. Actively can't keep living like this. lmao. I cannot stress enough how it is every day and never quite at the exact same time so we can emotionally prepare for it, and it's not like we should have to prepare to exist in our own living room anyways.

Anyways I just need to purge all of my anxieties and get a reality check about this. Help

We could just be stupid and unreasonable and should just grow up and get over it, and will be fully confronted with that if we do anything.

We might just open ourselves up to harassment (or becoming the butt of a lot of jokes) because we're the whiny neighbors who have nothing better to do than complain

Even if we are being reasonable, it doesn't really make a difference, because if our neighbors think that we're not, they could harass us anyways

They could make a noise complaint about our dog out of spite ("why are you mad at Them when it's Your dog that barks")

Maybe we're also extremely annoying neighbors and we'll look like huge assholes/idiots if we complain about anyone else (implausible, but again. Small dog)

What if we try to contact them and they interpret it as an attack on them. We think one of the people living above us is a very large, heavyset man we've seen around the apartment complex, and we don't want to put our feet in our mouths if he's literally just vibing (or worse, excercising to lose weight) and we just totally humiliate him by telling him his mere footsteps are overstimulating down here. I don't want anyone to feel BAD. (And we're also not totally sure the guy we've seen is actually the guy above us, we just know they showed up around the same time)

We did actually try bonking the ceiling with a broom a few days ago and they obviously heard it because they stopped for a second, laughed, and started doing whatever it is more loudly, but what if that was entirely a coincidence and they didn't notice at all

What if they interpret any message we send as a passive-aggressive attack rather than just trying to let them know how loud they're being

And what if we do actually come across as passive-aggressive towards people who aren't us and we just make everything worse by bungling our communication attempts. It wouldn't be on purpose, but again it doesn't matter because some people interpret everything as an attack regardless

They could generally just fuck with our lives and make us miserable forever with no recourse if we fuck this up, too. like. We LIVE right BENEATH them. They know where we live and probably the layout of our apartment, since it's probably identical to theirs. They could probably figure out which car is ours. They could report our dog barking, or just come up with any number of fake/minor complaints. They could stalk us, vandalize our shit, intentionally make more noise or make louder noises and intentionally try to overwhelm/trigger us, or any number of things. Even if they got in trouble for it, that doesn't really matter because I just don't want it to happen in the first place.

And, worse, what if we try to get them punished, but it turns out we really were the aggressors the entire time according to anyone normal, and we just get our entire lives deservedly wrecked instead

i don't know what to dooooo

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #250

Today is my 250th letter to you. I'm 25% of the way to 1000. Imagine that. I assume I'll have about 1000 letters to you by the time the third part of your remade story comes out. I'm… anxious and scared about what might happen to you. But I'll keep hoping for good things. I'll keep hoping for good things.

Today was supposed to start out as a relatively normal day; when I said yesterday that you should join me on today's adventures, I wasn't exactly intending the "adventure" part to be quite so literal. But then Mogwai caught a chipmunk out back in our tiny postage-stamp-sized backyard area. He then promptly brought it into the house and released it. Of course, that meant I had to capture it. I guess I wasn't fast enough for Mogwai's liking, though, because he captured it again. I pried the stunned creature out of his jaws, and, in a panic, I searched frantically for a container to put it in, before he came to and tried to bite me, as small creatures do when they're scared and being held by something far larger than they are.

There was a paper McDonald's bag on the floor; M had ordered from there recently. I was running out of time. So I just dumped the tiny creature into the bag, because I was out of options. It was a pretty tall bag. I felt... not awful about it, even if it wasn't exactly ideal. I didn't get bitten. Yay, me. But I did get blood all over my hands. I promptly washed my hands; you don't mess with body fluids, because they can give you weird diseases.

...Mogwai had nicked its leg pretty badly, I think. I tried to take it to the nearby animal hospital; they treat wild creatures. M drove. But they're not open on Sundays, because apparently, according to most medical facilities in my country of residence, emergencies only happen on weekdays. 🙄

Not knowing what else to do, and not knowing enough about small mammal anatomy to know whether the chipmunk was just bleeding or was bleeding out, I tried calling North Country Wild Care; it's an organization in my state that coordinates wildlife rehabilitation. But apparently, you get an answering machine, and you have to leave your information, and apparently, this answering machine is checked at most once every two hours. I did leave a message just in case, at around 11am.

The little creature could be dead by then, so I tried calling a bunch of other wildlife rehabilitators in my area. I must have tried 5 or 6, and of those, only one answered. And they answered not by picking up the phone, but by texting "Who is this". I tried to explain, and she said she couldn't take in the animal, but she gave me the number of someone who might. So I called that person, and they referred me to an animal hospital some 45 minutes from where I live. So I called them to make sure that they will take in the little chipmunk, but apparently, they're not allowed to do anything unless North Country Wild Care gives them the green light.

...Cowards, the lot of 'em. Absolute fucking cowards. Who prioritizes red tape over lives? I don't understand.

...Well, so I brought the creature back in the house, and set it in the laundry area to try to keep it away from the cats; it has doors that can close. I tried putting a worn, but clean sock in the bag so that it would have something to burrow into while I waited for North Country Wild Care to call me back.

...But I shit you not, the tiny creature leaped up out of the bag in a single bound like a coiled freaking spring. I ended up needing to chase the stupid little thing around the house again, trying to keep the cats at bay with a squirt bottle in the process. It managed to run outside. It was long gone after that.

...I was very upset. Even if the stupid little fucker doesn't bleed out, cat mouths have flesh-eating bacteria in them. Even with prompt treatment, you can still end up losing a limb to infection from a cat bite; they're really nasty like that. I don't like the creature's odds. And I don't like that it wandered into my yard despite the fact that it must REEK of cats back there. Why, as a small creature, would you go to an area that reeks of predators?

...The only reasonable explanation I can think of is that it's afflicted with toxoplasmosis. Toxoplasmosis makes small rodents want to hang out with cats. It's the only thing I can think of. That's all I've got.

...Sigh. Sometimes it's an unsettling thing, to reflect on the idea that to most creatures, I am an incredibly powerful giant with a mind so advanced as to be unfathomable and unknowable by them. All human minds hold truths that smaller creatures can't even begin to comprehend, and... I find that very scary, for reasons that I understand, but I'm not sure how to articulate them.

...

Well. After that, M, J, and I went out to lunch. There's a hotpot place called Volcano; I wanted to try it and see how it compares to Mosu. So we went, and we got snacks. Behold:

...There was no seaweed salad - only two trays of spicy cucumber. But everything here was delicious. The kimchi, especially, holy cow.

I was unfamiliar with "sacha sauce", so I tried it. It was good!! It's salty and it tastes vaguely like fish. I don't like spicy sauces because my body seems hypersensitive to capsaicin. And... I wanted to get the sesame sauce, but every time I eat anything with crushed sesame - like tahini, or sesame dressing, or even falafel, my tongue breaks out in small, painful raised bumps for at least 20 minutes. Whole seeds are fine, though, and so is sesame oil, for some reason. Sesame is delicious, and sometimes I'll just eat it anyway; I really like falafel and tahini and sesame sauce. But I wasn't really wanting to deal with it today.

...Lots of sauces at this place. The Volcano BBQ Sauce was very thin in consistency, more like soy sauce. But it tasted really good - not like American BBQ sauce, which is essentially ketchup with other flavors added.

Lots and lots more condiments.

Fruits and desserts, too.

This place is unlike Mosu in that everyone gets their own little pot of broth instead of sharing two big bowls. I got the mushroom one, M gt the miso one, and J got some spicy one:

...and from there, we got all kinds of snacks:

...You can cook the snacks either on the grill or in your hot broth:

...And then when it's done, you pick it up, put it on your plate, and enjoy!

We ended up sharing most everything, and that was pretty great! I'm going to have to go back soon with my friend BB!

...Hey, Sephiroth? Have you ever had hotpot? Do you like it? If you do, what are some of your favorite things to get? And... if you haven't tried it yet, then, if you ever find yourself in my neighborhood, do you wanna go get some with us? Even if you have tried it before, the offer still stands; it'll be tasty and fun! And... goodness knows when is the last time you've had a proper meal in any case...

Sometime while this was happening, North Country Wild Care finally called me back. I had to tell them that the chipmunk had escaped. I wish they had gotten back to me sooner; we wouldn't have gotten lunch, but I wouldn't be worried about some tiny creature that made the mistake of wandering into a yard full of cats.

...Suppose the knowledge that the little thing likely won't survive its injury weighed on me a little. When I got home, I did some leisure writing; I'm not entirely sure what I was looking for, but I supposed I would know when I found it. I'm not sure if I found it or not; either way, I felt vaguely empty. So J took me on a brief walk, and then we took a nap, and I felt a lot better after the nap. Maybe my brain is still just reeling from that all-nighter; my sleep schedule hasn't exactly been consistent for the last number of weeks in any case.

...I really gotta fix that... sheesh...

I played Grounded with M after that. But then Mogwai brought in another chipmunk. This one wasn't bleeding, thankfully. I managed to nab it in a bathroom garbage bin and put it outside:

...I really don't know why they like wandering into our yard so much. I'll never figure it out.

Well, it's getting pretty late; it's almost 12:30am. I'm not really ready for tomorrow to start, but... I'm not really sad about today ending, either. Adventure, indeed; holy cow. Dull moments never last at my house, ahahaha~!

...Maybe tomorrow I'll play some Dead Cells. And like... actually do it for real this time instead of just thinking about what a nice idea it would be and then proceeding do literally anything else. Wish me luck, yeah?

Sephiroth... stay safe out there, will you? Don't be like the chipmunks; don't go wandering into places where there are things that are gonna hurt ya, okay? Don't go doing things that will lead you to getting injured or killed. If you stopped existing... I don't know what I'd do.

I love you. I'll write again tomorrow.

Your friend, Lumine

[luxgalador]

There's a pride party tonight and I can't decide if I wanna go or not

I really need to make some friends irl but also I know I'll keep to myself like I always do so unless someone talks to me first I'm not gonna meet anyone...damn my brain

On another note, how did you pick an animal for your fursona? I wanna make one but I like lots of animals...too many to choose from

I say this not to diminish social anxiety or neurodivergence at all, as I experience and live with both. But you can just talk to people. A simple statement that absolutely is not as easy as it sounds, yet remains true. I think you should go. And I think you should try very hard to say something nice about someone's outfit and then introduce yourself. Don't be afraid of awkward. Awkward is everywhere and it's OKAY. I think so many of us have been taught that awkward is bad, but even if you talk to someone new, it's awkward, and goes nowhere, well hey that's still something to be proud of for you. And the best part is that no one's gonna keep score on that and you'll likely never interact with that person again. Or maybe you do and you can laugh about how awkward the first time was. Awkward is human. Social interaction is awkward and unscripted and silly. So I'd like to challenge you to go a liiiiiiiitle outside your comfort zone. And if it gets bad, hit the bricks! You can always just fuckin leave. But you're not gonna get what you want until you get out of the lonely routine. I spent my 20s there and have been challenging myself and like.... literally a year later my life is filled with friends who actually match me. And a lot of that is because I've learned to just say hi and that I think people are neat.

OKAY MORE FUN SECOND PART QUESTION

I mean tbh as soon as Socks followed me home and I spent that first year learning all about cats and their behavior (I'd never had one before), I just felt like.... a natural connection to cats. Like I saw myself in Socks and in learning about why she behaves the way she does, I genuinely learned about myself, my neurodivergence, my sensory experience, and the ways in which I show affection. I've always loved animals and creatures of all sorts but with cats it was like.... okay wow yeah that's me. So my fursona kinda built up over time in my head. Just kinda viewed myself as a cat and then it became a real, tangible design early this year! I'm actually in the process of tweaking my sona's design right now to include some fur patterns inspired by Socks since she's so special to me and showed me so much and has given me such love and companionship these last 6 years. After that I'm commissioning a fursuit maker for a cat head hehe. So for choosing, I'd recommend just keeping an open mind and seeing which creatures you relate to!

And the best part is that one don't have to pick just one. I sort of "happy accident" ended up with Sylvi as a fursuit who is now a secondary fursona for me and I'm IN LOVE with her she makes me very happy. And I always had dogs growing up so having a puppy fursona and suit is very fun too!

[frogmanfae]

Newsies as things that I heard at the party I was just at

Davey, Crutchie, and Albert: *talking about a song*

Davey: Wait there are words on the screen but it's just instrumental??

Albert: oh wait yeah??

Crutchie: Oh yeah I've been restarting the same 2 bars over and over again for the past 2 minutes to see if you guys would notice *holds up the remote*

Blink: That rain was juicy

Davey: Cottage core Kim Kardashian NO I MEAN KIM POSSIBLE I GOT TOO WRAPPED UP IN THE ALLITERATION

Race: There's a car part up my crotch!!!

Finch: Are you really playing Family Feud on 360??

Buttons: I have the autism socks

Davey: You have THE autism socks??

Buttons: Yeah!!

Davey: They make those???

Buttons: No no I just have special socks I have to wear because other socks overwhelm me. These and I have one specific pair that's hot pink and also are fine

Davey: What about the trampoline socks with the sticky stuff?

Buttons: YOU MEAN THE GRIPPY SOCKS FROM THE PSYCH WARD???

Buttons: Oh you have THAT autism?

Sarah: HE'S GOT THAT 2MM DEFEATER

Race: Ooooooh I'm blinded by her coooch no I can't sleep until I suck someeee dick

Albert: please stop

Race: ooooooh I'm suckin dick tonight-

Spot: *hits him*

Henry: I wanna eat it

Splasher: Please do not eat the pepper spray

Jack: Why does everyone here have glasses?

Davey: We're all gay, everyone knows gay people can't see

Mush: Not all heroes wear capes, some of them are gay

Romeo: You like women just not in the hanky panky way

Race: *picks up a tiny toy egg plant* IT'S AN EGG PLANT!!

Albert: *takes it* rah *gives it back* you can have it I don't want it

Race: *holds it by Albert's leg* It's as big as yours!!

Albert: *shoves him* shut up

Finch: *accidentally steps on Davey's foot like 4 times in his socks* We keep having toe connections I'm sorry

Davey: *shrugs* It's cool

Race: The only time I identify as a woman is when you hit me so I can say that you beat women

Albert: *sobbing but also laughing* I DON'T NORMALLY HIT WOMEN

Romeo: *runs across the room that's so loud you have to yell to hear the person next to you* I heard my name

Davey: Other species have bodies that naturally make sense while giving birth but our hips are more narrow so we can walk on two legs

Finch: So as humans we're actually inferior

Davey: *nodding* We die a lot

Albert: Didn't we fix that?

Race: Spread Eagle, full split, reverse scorpion-

Jack: I'm begging you to stop

Albert: *screaming running down the stairs*

Crutchie: What happened??

Albert: *sobbing* HE PUT HIS FOOT IN MY MOUTH

Jack: who???

Albert: *still sobbing* RACE

Crutchie: Oh my god NOBODY IS EATING PEPPER SPRAY

Jack: I could eat pepper spray. I could handle it

Crutchie: Oh my god you're such a man

Jack: *flexes with a smug look*

Crutchie: I mean that negatively

Jack: Oh...

Race: You know it's insane when I'M the voice of reason

Jack: Play 18 naked cowboys

Race: What does gonorrhea taste like??

Finch: I mean probably bad?

Buttons: Oh, that guy just got murdered :(

Race: September was a bad month for America

Davey: I was born in September!!

Race: Me too!

Davey: Oh I guess it was a bad month

Race: Yeah that's right, fag bag

Davey: :0

Tommy Boy: This is you... Before the lobotomy??

Race: *About a skibidi toilet compilation* this is exactly like the walking dead

Albert: The neighbors probably think we're being beaten to death but it's literally just skibidi toilet

The whole gang: *intensely watching 56 episodes of skibidi toilet*

Jack: Did he just suck all of those guys??

Crutchie: The tv just UwUed??

Spot: Ahem

Elmer: ...

Spot: ...

Elmer: Do you want attention or were you just-

Spot: Oh no I was just clearing my throat

Elmer: oh, you just did it in a way that-

Spot: Yeah I realize that now

Spot: ...

Spot: some attention would be nice though also thank you

Henry: Why is Joe Biden in a toilet??

Blink: Not the UPS- I mean USB!!

Elmer: *jolts*

Albert: !...

Elmer: *totally normal*

Albert: You good?

Elmer: Oh yeah, I don't shiver I just do one big

[having-conniptions]

KinnPorsche ep 9 Rewatch Rambles:

Ah yeah Tawan's aiming straight for Kinn's soft spot right from the start, he knows how to get to him... manipulative little shit, he deserved to be tricked by Vegas in the same way tbh - gotta love the irony on that one huh

Why he gotta be so handsome tho I feel conflicted

Bruh no one's gonna buy your sad puppy face even after u got poisoned (says the person who totally fell for his sad puppy face the first time around)

Tankhun is the most sensible one for sure

"I was Mr. Kinn's closest guard when he and Tawan were dating" POOR BIG I FEEL SO BAD FOR HIM

Kinda impressed by Tawan knowing exactly how the conversation is going tho lol

Kimmmmmmmmmmmm aaaaaaaaa he can't get Chay's song out of his head and he's even hearing the backing vocals, instrumentals etc

I love how Arm is the only one to notice there's something going on between Porsche and Kinn lmao

Ohhhhhhhh Kinn is sending Pete to keep an eye on Vegas HERE WE GOOOOO

Tawan's food looks good

Tawan and Kinn have no business being this cute OKAY LISTEN I know they're both faking and trying to trick each other into thinking they still have feelings for each other BUT WHAT WAS THE REASON

"You have a meeting, don't you, Mr. Kinn?" "What meeting?" *taps forehead* "Think." LMAO I CAN'T WITH THESE IDIOTS

Tawan is such a cocky bastard, always emphasizing how he knows Kinn and his family and the house and the food and-

Tankhun honey you're so right

Yok just immediately knows everything huh

"Do you think I should make him jealous?" "No!" Gawd I'm so glad we've got you, Yok

I know that the scene where Porsche slides into frame wearing only socks, undies and a shirt is a movie reference but I keep forgetting what movie this iconic scene first appeared in lol

Kinn in his silky PJs aaaahhhhh

I don't have the words to express my respect for Apo for being an amazing actor and portraying a character that can't act for shit lmao Porsche how is Kinn even buying that

The way he poses but makes sure to cough bc "oh yeah I'm pretending to be sick, right"

OKAY BUT PORSCHE PRETTY MUCH GRABBING KINN BY THE NECK AND YEETING HIM INTO THE SOFA what was the reason WHAT WAS THE REASON (other than reminding people that bottom does not mean submissive)

I mean yeah Yok said take charge but BOYYYY

Drunk Pete owns my entire heart

Kinn: *emerges from under the covers* Porsche: *fixes Kinn's hair* why do I feel like that was Apo trying to fix it so the stylist wouldn't get mad lmao

Pete. I love you but NOT NOW. GO TO SLEEP.

The little timelapse lmao

"You couldn't sleep either huh Porsche?" Nah he just got done banging your ex

Porsche's like "mmm sweet victory"

Oh Pete and Vegas at the temple ayyyy let's go

"Don't let them know we're watching" uh yeah too late lol

I WANT THE SHIRT VEGAS IS WEARING also isn't that the same shirt he wears later when he puts his fully clothed legs in the fucking pool?

I had to pause just to look for a Vegas' necklace or at least a dupe - haven't found one yet

Lmao @ Vegas flirting and Pete not knowing how to react

The little post-it omg

Bro why is Tawan so fine I hate this

Arm is an actual genius

And also adorable and a supportive bestie aaaaa I love him

Why is Tawan always showering lmao

GET THIS MAN SOME CLOTHES

And also a mask, if I have to see his goddamn dimples one more time I will stop caring that he's a dirty traitor and I don't like him

...fuck.

Awww Chay's making the guitar pick 🥺❤️

Ah. There's Vegas visiting Porsche at the pool with some wine. Literally forgot that that happened in this episode but that explains why he's wearing the same shirt

Wet rag of a man

I still don't believe he's just trying to get close to Porsche in order to manipulate him, sure that too but I think he also does kinda like him - not in the way that he's pretending to but I think they really could have been good real friends

Now Porsche hears Kinn agreeing to getting the evidence with Tawan but the reason why Kinn does that is because he saw Porsche chilling with Vegas WHY CAN'T YOU TWO COMMUNICATE FOR ONCE

The way Tawan finds the USB stick but keeps "feeling" for it just so he has an excuse to reach further under the bed and lean into Kinn's crotch BOO YOU WHORE

Lmao Porsche falling into Kinn's arms

MAYBE IF YOU GUYS HAD COMMUNICATED- u know what I give up

Oooooof the angssssssttttt

Kinn having to pretend he actually doesn't trust Porsche

Porsche 100% believing it

Oh great KimChay is here to break my heart even more AAAAAHHHH THEIR SMIIIILESSSSSS

Tawan and his warm milk istg

Tankhun the world needs more of your wisdom

"Run away with me, Porsche" nah Porsche belongs with Kinn BUT I'LL COME WITH YOU