#i like to think riddler was trying to get them both to arkham another way but ed took his words too literally and riddler freaked the

[savanir]

DP x DC prompt [3]

during one of the final psych evals at Arkham right before he gets to be released, the whole thing wrapped up so tidy, just a little relapse which involved a robbery. Getting sent back to Arkham, but he got to stay at the asylum so long that he no longer has to serve a prison sentence, score!

But during that eval his overseeing psychiatrist recommended him to have a change of scenery, some fresh non polluted air.

Riddler was rather convinced the guy was making this recommendation to everyone in Arkham in their own weird way to convince them to just leave Gotham and become someone else's problem. should he notify Batman about it somehow? nah, it’ll be more interesting to see how this is gonna turn out in the long run.

But can he leave the state? Can he even leave the city? he never really bothered to look into it, at least not legally, up until now if he felt he needed to leave for one of his plans he just did it.

Turns out he can, it’s a whole hassle and a half though, first a judge and then a probation officer and he’s pretty sure both were like “what the hell is this psychiatrist guy thinking!?” but at the same time, shrink probably knows what he’s doing (WRONG) so he’s allowed to go visit out of state family or whatever.

he had to wear this nice ankle monitor though, Wayne Enterprises™ tech, not overly bulky but still very present. real fancy, and a fun extra challenge heh.

now as for a good reason to leave New Jersey he’s going to need distant relatives, and he finds some, great grandpa walker also has a son, who had a son who had a daughter Madeline, who married some guy Jack Fenton, and she lives somewhere out in the boonies Illinois. great he’ll visit her.

far enough away in all sense of the word that there is no way she knows anything about him. it would be best to call her first though, be polite about it.

“hello, you have reached Fenton works, this is Maddie speaking” 

“Riddle me this-” ah whoops, habit, oh whatever, “we don’t share parents, but certainly a part of your life, from laughter to strife. Who am I?”

there is a pause …  he’s going to be a bit disappointed if she hangs up if he’s honest.

“cousins~” comes the cheery reply.

“correct! the name is Edward Nygma, we are distantly related you and I and well-”

“oh you simply must come visit!” 

well this was rather easy, perhaps a little too easy, but she lives in the midwest so maybe just going with whatever some guy says over the phone is normal there? stranger danger not really a thing in a small town where everyone knows everyone?

things start to make a little more sense once he gets there and he’s starting to think some things might run in the family. like a preference for the colour green and weird hyperfixations and genius bordering on insanity. Though that remains to be seen, Jack does not seem like a very bright light after his very enthusiastic welcome.

their kids however are observant and sharp. young Jasmine is wasting no time trying to psychoanalyze him. and the boy, Danny, he had not really meant to and he swears he’s sticking with calling the kid Danny so he wouldn’t seem overly familiar, but he might have called him little bird a couple times now.

but that’s all whatever, he’s playing nice here. and he doesn’t even have to worry about his eccentricities tripping him up because this place is insane.

There actually is a local teen vigilante active but he seems about as loved as he’s disliked. and the ghost boy’s enemies are basically all his own kind, which another crazy thing to now know about. ghost. they are real actually, how is Gotham not completely overrun? and how do they even work? and where do they keep coming from?

Edward might be getting a little sidetracked here. He had fully intended to sneakily get his next big game plan underway all the way out here, ankle monitor be damned. but he hasn’t made any progress at all.

Instead he’s been listening to Madeline and Jack to maybe figure out what the deal is with these ectoplasmic entities, he has to know, at this point he might go crazier if he doesn’t. 

He’s making Jasmine promise him not to get her doctorate in Gotham, he’s going back and forth with space riddles with Danny.

so yeah the whole thing kinda just became a vacation, maybe the psychiatrist had the right idea after all? hmm nah, probably not. but this is fun. He’s thinking about recommending this place to some of the others.

It's different enough to get the vacation feel, but enough crazy shit happens to make it all feel like home.

it is not until Maddie wants to talk with him about potentially switching the position of godfather of Danny to him rather than some weird rich friend of theirs that Edward realizes he might have lost the plot somewhere

Apparently the little bird basically begged them with a powerpoint presentation on how he likes Edward so much more than that Vladimir guy. 

And honestly, the fellow sounds like a Dracula Lutho so even if it’s kinda sad Edward can understand why he’d be considered a better option. Even if the guy has more money and a huge company that makes him said money. And it’s not like the Fentons know about his Riddler activities.

Thinking it over, Edward does think that Danny would like Gotham and Wayne has that space program thing right? The kid is definitely smart enough for that (Nygma certified), and yeah Edward does quite like their space themed back and forth. So, fuck it, why not, what is the worst that could happen?

He doubts Maddie and Jack are gonna kick it any time soon anyway out here in the boonies, it’s just a title thing, a stamp of approval or something.

he should have known he was going to eat those words later… he had this whole beautifully elaborate trap set up for the whole Batclan, and he was just getting to the good part when his phone went off.

Had to put the whole thing on pause cause that particular contact wasn’t gonna get ignored. He did promise to be available.

If the whole thing he had planned now went tits up he could at the very least laugh later at the reactions of the bats as he told them to “hold up one second, I have to take this.” while they were all in various perilous positions. 

Sadly he did have to go, he had a very distressed godson to pick up.

[c0nn0r-c0nn0r13]

My weird Tim is the next riddler AU

So, i aint good at writing so just stick with me please as i try to explain whatever this is.

This “uncle Eddie”, (Tim’s fake uncle) is Edward Nygma. Tim need’s an uncle, he doesn’t know what to do, so he goes to the only person he would know who would go along with something so crazy. So he visits Nygma in Arkham Asylum and proposes he bail Nygma out of Arkham if he plays his uncle “eddie”. Tim says they make it into a riddle for Batman.

Edward, seeing this small weird child, visit him in Arkham to set him up for the start of a riddle, goes along with it.

The two work together to make a riddle for Batman, and somewhere along the way Edward figures out Tim is Robin. They both know the other knows, but neither brings it up. Edward does riddler things, Tim solves the riddler things. They live in a weird harmony, one that plays so well, yet so bad.

Then Tim’s sixteenth birthday happened. The birthday mission. Tim needs to solve it, it was like a unsolvable puzzle. A riddle. He goes to Edward, they solve it, the figure out the meaning of the birthday mission together.

Tim quits Robin after it’s solved, the next, the riddler gets a sidekick.

The sidekick never got a name (i can’t think of one, SORRY!) the two work well together, they make riddles, the riddles get solved, they get caught, they get arrested, they break out, repeat. At the same time, the third robin is missing, the bats can’t find him, soon, the third robin gets a case next to the seconds.

Many years later, the riddler dies. They don’t know how he dies, but he does. A green question mark appears on the clock tower, another riddle.

After so, so, so long, the bats solve the riddle, they find Edward Nygma’s grave stone and standing behind it is none other them the riddler’s sidekick. He’s in the riddler’s outfit, but it’s modified, changed. Tim stands there, he’s in morning, but the riddles won’t die with his uncle.

A new riddler is born, one as crazy as genuine.

[puppetmaster13u]

Meat Marionette #11?

Thinkin about the rogues in this Au, and like, the difference between their relationship with the bats vs this Au. 

 For example, Selina. I’ll admit I take a bit of inspiration from the 2022 movie and mix it with comic depictions along with the different cartoons, which honestly isn’t too different from each other by too much. Now, I don’t think that Catwoman would flirt with this version of Batman, what with his body being a meat puppet that is visibly not human and off putting. There’s also the fact that she would have been an early-ish rogue of his, at least in order of encounters. Which means that she probably encounters the Bat for the first time while Bruce was still getting used to said gifted body, which in turn was probably terrifying. So there’s still a cat and mouse game happening, but it’s more akin to Selina doing her darn best to avoid the Bat no matter what, because to her it isn’t above trying to kill. It’s like seeing a lion where you figure you’re safe at this distance, until it starts moving and you realize that you are definitely not far enough away. 

 Another rogue that I am thinking of is Harvey and Two-Face (Which DC, give Two-Face a proper name :/ he’s his own dude even if they share a body). Harvey was best friends with Bruce, hell they were practically high-school sweethearts in some cases! And Bruce still visits him in Arkham, canonically still talks and interacts with both his friend and TF. Now if anyone is going to notice the changes to Bruce, it’s going to be Harvey. He’s going to be the first to notice how Bruce’s movements are now dangerous and downright predatory, with too much grace even for a dancer or martial artist. There’s something familiar about that movement, and Harvey isn’t an idiot, TF isn’t one either. They know there’s something wrong with Bruce even if he insists he’s fine. In canon Harvey straight up broke down and cried when he found out Bruce was Batman, so I’m wondering what their reaction to this version of the bat would be…

 There’s also rogues like the Riddler and the Joker who are downright obsessed with Batman, but would they still be with this one? I could see Joker slowly becoming obsessed as the creatures continue to thwart him over and over again, but I’m still rotating Riddler. 

 But y’know who would definitely be obsessed with the batclan?

Scarecrow. The man is obsessed with studying fear, with the effects it has and how to cause it. So the bats, who bring terror wherever they go, with something about them continuously tingling at the back of ones’ more instinctive mind that this is something to fear? He would be utterly enthralled, he’d need to know more, he’d need to know Everything. Especially if his fear toxin doesn’t work right on them. After all, how would a gas effect something without lungs? How can you inject something that doesn’t have blood, that’s not quite alive, not in the way that we as humans understand? How can you cause fear of something that has stared into the Tunnels’ heart and lived? Or something like that lol. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

AU is a combo of my cryptid batfam and @phoenixcatch7 's Possessed Doll au, go check them out, they're amazing

[skye707]

Ok but which of the Riddlers would actually get along with their fem!selves? I feel like at least some of them would develop crushes, and the rest would develop rivalries

Oh, definitely lots of rivalries. But I think they'd accept it more if the loss is coming from a version of themselves in a way.

Unburied - Not even a rivalry, they're just friends. Probably get along the most of any of the Riddler pairings. Like a sibling relationship in a way where they can just about finish each other's sentences.

ZY - Rivalry. The most intense rivalry. Neither can handle the idea that there is another version of themselves that is actively trying to outdo them. Masc is doing it because that's just how he is with everyone, but Fem is doing it because she's so sick of dudes belittling her. Either will do whatever it takes to "win".

Dano - Actually very little interaction between these two. It's the same thing that happens when you put two extreme introverts in a room together: neither will speak unless absolutely necessary. If someone says something about Renewal in Gotham, then they'd become a dangerous duo, but if not, both are silently judging each other.

YJ - Goofballs who try to commit crimes together but end up tripping over each other's feet. So, when that doesn't pan out, they just stick to normal activities like seeing who can stack the highest card tower.

Gotham - They'd get along...at first. However, they would both quickly realize that they can't impress the other with fun facts, because they already know...and interrupt them. Aaaaand it would quickly devolve into an intense rivalry to prove the superior Riddler.

BTAA - Very similar to Gotham, these two start off friendly but neither can stand the fact that they're both intelligent. There is never any actual confrontation, more like sly comments and passive aggressiveness. They're both adults, so they can refrain from childish behavior, right?

Arkham - Reluctant friends. They both tell themselves they don't need help with their projects, but the other is right there and no one else knows how to properly wire the joints of the robot so that the reaction time is flawless. So, only an idiot wouldn't take advantage of that opportunity, or that's what they tell themselves.

BTAS - Literally parents. If Masc BTAS is a mom friend, then Fem is an actual mom. Someone asks BTAS if they can do something, he says ask her. What did she say? She said to ask you. Everyone except them notices this strange relationship.

Telltale - Best friends. Both of them have thick skin so the barbed comments don't bother each other, and it is so refreshing to be able to be themselves around each other. If someone says something about the two of them, they can expect their life to become a living hell courtesy of the local grandparents.

[specialinterestsgalore]

Borderline Personality Disorder in The Batman (2022)

I wrote this in 2022 for a class so I don't fully agree with everything written as it was a while ago and I was trying to get a grade but it's an interesting character study

In the 2022 film The Batman both Bruce Wayne/The Batman and Edward Nashton/The Riddler display signs of borderline personality disorder. While both men fit the criteria for BPD in their own way, this section will predominantly focus on Edward Nashton. Nashton is a white male who appears to be in his late 20s to early 30s. He is shown to have no close personal connections and has little interaction with the outside world other than posting online videos to his approximately 500 followers, communications with the press following his elaborate murders, and a perceived, and in reality one sided, partnership with The Batman. What is known of Nashton’s political ideology is solely centered around the political corruption in the City of Gotham. He has no faith left in the political system or those who participate in it. Though he is a criminal in his own right, the same as his victims, he completely devalues their lives and sees them as nothing more than scum to be cleansed from Gotham and vessels to deliver his message through. He has dedicated his life to exposing the corruption of the Gotham elite due to how he feels they have failed him. Early in his life Nashton was orphaned, the exact circumstances are unknown, and he describes his time at the orphanage as unbearable, stating that he would often wake up to rats biting at him and that at least one of the infants would die every winter. This kind of trauma early in one’s life undoubtedly has profound effects on development and mental health. It is quite obvious from Nashton’s behavior in the film that BPD is not the only disorder caused by his past trauma; he likely has PTSD and displays a high amount of delusional thinking that may not be attributable to borderline personality disorder. 

Nashton is fixated on both Bruce Wayne and The Batman, unaware that they are the same person. He despises Bruce Wayne due to the fact that while he was left suffering in an overcrowded, underfunded orphanage while all of Gotham mourned the loss of Thomas and Martha Wayne and sympathized with Bruce Wayne, alone in his ‘palace,’ as The Riddler calls it. Nashton does not feel that Bruce has suffered as he has and that Bruce must pay for the sins of his father. On the other hand, The Riddler idolizes The Batman for his mission to rid the City of Gotham from crime and corruption. He feels that they are one and the same. When Nashton finally meets The Batman, he is overjoyed that his mission is finally coming to fruition, but when The Batman rejects him, Nashton moves very quickly from panic and denial to total devaluation of The Batman and his abilities. Another,albeit lesser, example of Nashton’s idealization in relationships is his reaction to his fellow prisoner in Arkham Asylum. While Nashton is distressed at The Batman’s rejection, another prisoner begins to offer words of comfort to him. Nashton immediately latches on to this and begins to envision the man as a great friend and supporter without ever seeing him. This clearly illustrates the tendency for those with borderline personality disorder to focus on extremes (idealization or devaluation) in their interpersonal relationships. While Nashton does not display self damaging behavior in the typical sense, it can be argued that his fixation on The Batman, the way he destroys his home to enact his revenge, and his sacrificing himself to the Gotham Police Department (who are notoriously corrupt and not unlikely to desire revenge on Nashton after he murdered the police commissioner) after his plan is completed are all behaviors that are not in his own best interest and at times are damaging to his own wellbeing.

[sweetlikehoneystingslikeabee]

hello could I please request headcanons for btas, telltale, and arkham riddler with a s/o who has insomnia?

"Can't sleep, how about you?" BTAS, Telltale, Arkham Riddler x Reader

Oooooo yes! You're definitely in good company, at least.

TW: suggestive

BTAS

Insomniac who loves taking quick naps. It's something much more acceptable now that he's a criminal and not in the official video game business- Though he definitely snuck them in then, too.

He likely discovers your insomnia while you're getting a glass of water and walking around... while he was also getting a glass of water and walking around.

It's these moments in the night you two find a lot of clever and profound conversation occurs between the two of you. When it started, if it's always been like that, your thoughts on happenings in your life and his. Lots of goofy laughs when the two of you get just a tad too tired.

Sometimes, it's these moments that prompt you both to climb back into bed and fall asleep in each other's arms. Something about hot tea or coffee just... talking while you listen to the sounds of the night together.

Expect him to be very flattering and complimentary of your sleeping form when you do end up falling asleep together. He can't help that you're a paragon of beauty/good looks even when you sleep!

Other nights, he might jokingly suggest that you could find "other activities ;)" to help you both fall asleep. If you actually took him up on it, he's going to be a flustered, blushing mess.

Telltale

Needs very minimal sleep to function. He's genuinely always been like that, and no longer really thinks about it.

However, when you two first start spending nights together and he sees you still up and about or awake, he states his concerns.

It might come off like scolding, but it comes from a place of concern and care. Don't you know you need rest? How are you going to properly function next to him if you're tired?

While he realizes there's only so much he can do, expect him to take lead in trying to find a solution. Some might think of this as a fussy sort of behavior, he thinks of it as something a partner should do. You look out for one another. It's logical for him to want to fix a problem for you.

If/When none of it works, you'll notice he checks in on you more often in the night. Are you laying there awake in bed, lonely? Are you occupying yourself? He doesn't watch TV often but there are a few documentaries he could recommend as light listening...

Really, it's all so taxing for him. It's how he phrases it, anyway. But you know better. If he didn't care so much, he wouldn't bother. Every irritated sounding scoff while he goes out of his way to do things for you. Cranky grump of a man.

Arkham

This man hardly ever sleeps. At times he will go days on only a couple of hours. Very unhealthy and when you drag him to bed he's either laying there awake or sleeps for an obscene amount of time. Then he's angry that he slept so long.

Lives on dark coffee and takeout.

When he sees you up in the middle of the night because you can't sleep the first time, he questions you. Might even joke about you trying to slink out past his notice. A self-defense mechanism guarding such an insecurity for someone he truly cares for.

Ah. You can't sleep. Well. He doesn't either. It's awkward for a moment.

Do you- Do you maybe want to assist him? There's no real pressure there, but it's better than staring at the ceiling waiting for something that just isn't going to happen.

He's not going to be nice to you assisting him just because of the insomnia connection, though. Expect him to be just as much of a hardass as normal- high expectations and standards for what qualifies as "good work" in his workshop.

however, if you don't mind the griping and work, it's a pretty fair distraction. Not to mention the bonding! That... sometimes turns to intimate situations when both of you get riled up.

[just-an-enby-lemon]

Some Game HC's I have about Riddler:

BTAS Riddler loves playing DnD both as a player (always a caster) and as the DM. He is a game developer in the 90's so you bet your ass he was the fliperama kid. Everyday he went to the local game station (and later started exploring and looking for different ones all across Gotham) with only one coin. He played once against a player in a winning streak beting coins and he always won and would accept bets from challengers. He was abble to play all day with only one coin because he never lost a bet.

Gotham Riddler is another DnD nerd and a gamer. But I think he had more money growing up than BTAS Riddler and actually played games in a gameboy. He got a summer job so he could buy more games than Mario and Pokemon. Also I'm sorry but Gotham Riddler never played DnD, that man was born to be a DM and is likely the one DM that didn't became one because it's harder to find a DM than a party so you DM once and now that's your fate.

Arkham Riddler plays Magic The Gathering. He also plays DnD and he is the insufurable player that goes out of the way to create the most OP characthers completly full of combos and makes everything boring for everyone else because he slays too hard. He is insuferable playing Magic as well but at least he is being insuferable against his adversaries. He lost his original deck after being arrested the first time and somehow it ended on young Barbara Gordon's hands. The small time period were pre teen Barbara was the biggest Magic nerd and forced a confused Jim to play was probably the worst thing Riddler ever did to comissioner Gordon and that includes killing his co-workers and friends. Later Barbara went to play it with Jason and Tim (who she isn't dating cause ew), Bernard joined at some point.

The last DnD player is Unburied Riddler who is the opposite to Arkham: he always plays as a bard and he is the biggest follower of the rule of cool/the wonders of RP ever. He knows the rule book upside down but he never really followed the rules, he just sweet talks the DM and the tabble into letting him role for his insane plans to the point that after he basically forced Barbara and Bruce to play with him (Barbara asked Montoya to DM) no one on the tabble even knew what bardic inspiration actually did until Alfred heard them playing and as a closeted DnD nerd got incrisingly distressed by Eddie's "gameplay style". Since then Montoya joined the tabble as a paladim and Alfred is the DM. Instead of analysing what to pick to upgrade his characther Eddie spends all the time trying to find ways to sweet talk Alfred (the hardest DM to bullshit ever) into letting him do his thing. Right now his best trick is to make Bruce either join or get excited for the result because Alfred has a soft spot for his son Master Bruce.

Zero Year Riddler for all his cool persona is a nerd and not only he colects all different editions of War (yes the boardgame, the ancient Greece one is his favorite) but he plays competitive Pokemon (both online and the card game). While he is a good Pokemon player he did lose to an incredible good 12yo and he cried a whole day before trying to extract revenge. Unfortunaly for Ed the kid was from Metropolis and there was a change, small as it was, that Superman could get involved and Eddie isn't really one to get his ass beat by Superman.

Still on the card games BTAA Riddler plays Yu-Gi-Oh. He somehow understands the rules and is good on it. Miss Tuesday used to make fun of him for it until Autum acidentaly introduced her to Bakugan. If you play Bakugan you can't make fun of other people's card game choices. BTAA Riddler also plays Pokemon Go, he started because he thought it was hip and cool (he isn't even that old, he is like 30 but he just wants to be cool with the teens that badly already) and kept going because he really likes to take random pictures of pokemon on normal day things, he also loves shinny hunting. He does it on the actual game as well. He never actually played the whole Pokemon story, he just shinny hunts a lot and stops playing after he catched enough cool shinnies. He has some of the first one to capture the shinng videos and a shinny hunting secret twitter.

[Not a Riddler one but BTAS Joker also plays Yu-Gi-Oh because one has to be mad to understand all the different invocation rules (I say that as a former Yu-Gi-Oh nerd). Harley also plays Yu-Gi-Oh on BTAS but she downplays her talents to let Joker win when she is actually insanely good at it.]

[helga-heason]

Letter #13

Dear Selina,

Unfortunately it’ll be another short letter here - I have meetings left and right with several people. I’ve got Gotham PD, Gordon, Bella Reál, the Joker, and possibly the Riddler if he can calm down for five seconds. Apparently he’s been having a few issues with Arkham staff and keeps trying to break out of his cell. I’d say something is coming - and, I mean, it probably is - but I think most of this is just agitation and deflection. Arkham aren’t the nicest to their prisoners.

I decided to meet Tim Drake again at the diner the other day. He was oddly punctual, though I guess people like him don’t really have much in the way of hobbies or occupations. I managed to get Alfred to keep Robin at home, via the power of food distractions and an annoyingly jingly bell.

I made more of an effort to be present in the conversation, though mostly stuck to ‘mhm’s and ‘yeahhhhh’s here and there. I found out a little more about him, that he likes cats and dogs and all animals inbetween, that he’s an acrobat and once stole a man’s liquor licence somehow. I told him I have a cat named Robin, and he laughed. “You named your cat after a bird?” he asked me. Yes, I answered, because she has a thing about bringing feathers back and there’s a feather mountain in the cave. I gave the kid the address to the cave and one of my many emergency numbers, telling him to find or contact me if he needed help. … Yep. We both have a thing for strays. I blame you for this.

Speaking of the feather mountain - there is a mountain of feathers by the Batmobile. Robin likes storing them under the damn thing, so every time we drive off anywhere, they fly out everywhere, like cherry blossom petals but… Feathers. Robin has also taken to greeting me at the entrance of the Batcave on the rare occasion I manage to leave without her noticing, meowing insistently and sitting in my food as punishment for leaving her. She’s very annoying at times, but god, I wouldn’t have her any other way.

Well, Gordon’s probably waiting. I hope you’re well.

Yours, always,

the Bat(man) - and Robin the cat.

[neon-lights-stardust-nights]

5am asks (for batman?) ⏰ ⛪ ❤️ 🌧️? -@wegotaselfshipperere

So, turns out I'm sleepy and overheated and a little woozy because I'm probably sick? Whoopsy. At least it's probably just the same 24 hour virus my husband had. So, thank you everyone sending these: I need low effort entertainment.

Also ah--I don't think I ever gave that QPR ship a tag... Which is silly of me... That or you meant F/Os from batman in general. There's like four emojis there so I am going to divy this up into all four of those because there ARE four including Bruce! Genius.

I'm so sorry if this makes no sense, I am ill.

[meme]

⏰ Somehow, through magic, time travel, worm holes, or maybe just as a non cannon idea, you meet your F/O when they were a little kid. 8-12 ish range. What are they like? How do you interact with them? + Riddler

Honestly, the best part of this prompt is just that Kronos could unironically meet baby Edward if fae ever managed to take faers technology further.

Edward, like most Batman characters, had an… Interesting childhood. I always imagine he was a really quiet kid, swallowing loud and dramatic behavior for his own survival. So it'd be a really stark contrast to see him making himself small. It'd probably remind Kronos a lot of faerself.

I imagine fae would just try to give him a good day to remember in the future (even if that might be weird since they're also on again/off again dating. Not in a bad way, they just keep forgetting to actually make it official, and then Strange happened, and he's not keen on sharing, and--) Take him out for ice cream or something else. Kronos isn't exactly good with kids, but fae would try.

He'd probably start infodumping about stuff he likes, and even if it's the most boring shit on Earth to faer: fae is at least going to pretend to listen. Eddie needs this. Kronos isn't going to make faerself yet another adult who persecuted him over this shit.

Maybe fae'd give him a little pocket watch "to remember me by." It has single charges of faers temporary time stopping. What fucked timeline splits off this decision will go unknown to the Kronos returning to the universe fae came from, but needless to say: there is a Riddler who was inspired by that mysterious man with the pocket watch and goatee…

⛪ Is your F/O particularly religious? If so, which group and how dedicated are they? + Scarecrow

Crane isn't RELIGIOUS persay. I like Crane's who grew up religious, who knew the fear of god before they knew the fear they loved to inflict. I think even as a kid though, he didn't internalize all of it. Some of it stuck around in adulthood though, the parts he did actually buy into.

It mostly results in him being superstitious. The specific flavor of religion was Catholic. He's not a "masturbating makes you go blind," Catholic, but he is a "gets 666 coincidentally on something and immediately tries to get out of whatever it was for" kind of superstitious.

I don't have a lot to say about this one, despite my reblogging blasphemy and priest kink shit earlier. I have religious trauma and fetishes, not like. Religion www.

❤ What type of relationship do you and your F/O have? Are you prank buddies? An old married couple? What is your self ship dynamic? + Strange

Once they're properly established and used to each other? It honestly feels like they both have each other on leashes, to be honest. I think from the outside it just looks like Strange is reeling in Kronos. In actuality, fae is also reeling him in too.

Kronos is a little, overconfident gremlin of a man. Strange would lobotomize someone for sillies if left alone. He's just way fucking smarter about it. Kronos is a jealous patient though, which is usually the reeling in part. "What do you MEAN you aren't committing attrocious experiments on me specifically?"

Kronos does need to be reeled in too though. Fae would be recklessly villainous if not for Strange. I mean like Powerpuff Girls level nonsense. Kronos is gonna get faerself tossed in Arkham, and while Strange wouldn't be 100% against the control over faer that would give him, he doesn't want to make an enemy of himself in faers eyes on accident! So he basically works as faers villain manager.

So yeah, they are like. Two over excited cats on leashes, but they're holding the leashes.

🌧 Not everything is perfect… So one day everything just seems to go wrong. Nothing is working out like you thought it would and people are rude. You come home angry and tired and however else a bad day makes you feel. How would your F/O comfort you, or make your day a little brighter? + Bruce

Honestly? If fae had a terrible no-good day? It'd be very easy to just lavish faer in luxuries.

Kronos is a buyable man, but also a cheap man. Bruce is aware of this. The rich playboy thing comes in handy taking faer out on the town too! Oh? Everything is going wrong? Well there's some gormet burger place down in west Gotham!

Though again: Kronos is a cheap man. Bruce probably wouldn't be caught dead in a McDonalds otherwise, but fae wanted it. It's all food and bathbombs, forcing in him with faer. It's a kind of control over the day he can extend without furthering any anxiety fae may be suffering from. Kronos hates being asked "what do you want" when fae's anxious and awful--the anxiety just gives faer a freeze response. So he takes the lead of "let's get food" and waits for faer to go "burgers? Burgers please?"

It's a little bit of baby steps, but he's alright with doing it. If a day was that awful, there's no need to make it worse.

[clotpole-tm]

[riddle-me-ri]

Ok, here's another one. Zero Year, Arkham, BTAS Riddler

He is having a conversation with Reader, who he isn't on friendly terms with, and third Rogue. Rogue wanting to point something out says.

"It doesn't work! It's like asking Y/N if she would sleep with you"

"Eh." Y/N said.

"Excuse me?"

"Just because I hate his guts doesn't mean he doesn't have a pretty face."

A/N: hahaha this is brilliant! I hope you don't mind I took some liberties in the wording of the conversations but I hopw the idea still reads rip. This was such a fun exercise to write other Rogues! Thanks for requesting! Also N/N is nickname since Harley loves to give people nicknames ❤🖤 Also this is untitled cause I wasn't sure what to title these scenarios lol

Trigger Warnings: Suggestive themes and strong language

Zero Year/Capullo Riddler:

“You really don’t perceive me as a threat? The man that brought Gotham City to its knees?” Ed argued.

“Well, Gotham doesn’t really have the best legs to stand on…” Joker quips back. 

You roll your eyes, it’s never-ending feud between these two.

You just had to be stuck in an Arkham padded cell. Between the both of them. You weren’t even insane, they were just overpopulated at Blackgate, but if they didn’t get you out you were going to become insane eventually.

“Y/N, tell that absolute clown-”

“Hey don’t forget handsome!” 

Edward growls in frustration. “Tell him how I’m Batman’s superior foe. How I threw Batman into hiding! How I ran this city for months!”

Joker laughs. “You’ve gotta better chance convincing her to fuck you Eddie boy.” 

“Eh..well..”

“Huh?” Both men rushed towards the wall that separated them from you.

“Please tell me you’re joking…” You hear Joker mutter. 

“I mean…Don’t get me wrong he’s a smug pompous asshole…

Unknowingly, Edward and Joker both shrug and nod. The one thing they could agree on. Well that and Batman. 

“...but he is a cute pompous asshole. Not to mention his face is totally sit-able.”

For one rare moment the Joker was actually speechless for a minute. He laments, “please tell me your joking…”

“I’m afraid she’s dead serious, my friend. As she should be. Once I no doubt escape before the clown…I’d like to take you up on that offer…”

Arkhamverse Riddler: 

“Edward, it’s not going to work.”

“Oh please, what do you know, Crane? Only someone of my parallel intellectual prowess can see the immaculate results it will produce."

Crane blinks and rubs his temples. "Edward, how is building a race course full of obstacles going to prove you're more intelligent than Batman?"

"It calls for quick thinking! He can't possibly predict every twist and turn. The moment he thinks he's solved a puzzle, another one comes right up before a moment's notice! Only a cunning genius of my caliber can pull this off." 

"I'm afraid it'll be like you trying to court Y/N to bed. It's just not going to work.."

"Ah..well…" you interject.

The two men look away from Ed's blueprints on the table to steal a glance at you. You were steadily scrolling through your phone, not lifting your head once.

"W-What was that?" Johnathan inquiries not sure if he heard right. 

You look up to the master of fear and shrug your shoulders. "I mean yeah he's a greasy egomaniac, but he is handsome in a dirty rugged kinda way." 

Johnathan blinks as if still trying to compute this new development. He looks over to Edward who has gone uncharacteristically quiet. 

Edward's face was a deep shade of red and his eyes were as wide as saucers. Riddler.exe has stopped working, good luck trying to reboot. 

BTAS Riddler: 

"Harley, hitting the toy with a mallet won't help you solve it…"

"Sure it can! It fixed all my other problems!" Harley wounds back with her signature mallet. Before she can strike the puzzle toy, Edward snatches it out of the mallet's path.

"Harley..that's cheating…"

"C'mon, Eddie! I've already tried everything! It's like Y/N sleeping with you! It's impossible!"

"Well not…impossible…" You mutter.

"Did I hear that right, N/N? You'd sleep with Ed?!"

"I mean yeah he's an obnoxious know-it-all, but he's so adorable!"  

Harley fake hurls at your admission. 

Meanwhile Ed is walking away, lowering his hat to try and hide his reddening face from the both of you.

[vigilvntes]

ok 2 thoughts today! (of course)

1. do u think edward/riddler gets off (lol bad wording but u know what I mean hopefully) whenever y/n might have to come in and beat him up? because, he doesnt really use any fighting methods to get at his enemies, he uses brains and his smarts soo seeing his own enemy, close enemy btw, beat him up because he's a criminal is something I feel like he secretly enjoys. let's be real, HE MUST be liking it.

2. whenever he gets arrested or y/n manages to have gcpd come in to arrest him, he always hit her back with his taunts and riddles. I know we talked about how him taunting her is always a given, it's a thing he does with her. but when it comes to having him arrested, he's always looking back like "ohh we'll have one of our many reunions soon" and she's over here like "🙄😐 try me, Eddie, I dare u."

also! that's another thing, nicknames! now I dont really know any good superhero name for y/n as that hasn't been really discussed but I just knowww Edward is hitting back those nicknames for her. he also VERY much enjoys the whole "eddie" thing y/n has for him despite still being enemies. I feel as tho that nickname would stick with the both of them because of the whole "past" thing they had with eachother.

yes, lots of thoughts. pls, take your time to read them. don't have to get to them right away if I cant.

-❔

OK BUT LIKE,,,YES. he has to enjoy it. there's no way he doesn't enjoy it. like he knows she's always gonna come after him, and that she may or may not kick ten bells of shit out of him, yet he keeps getting back on his bullshit so there's absolutely no way that he doesn't get a kick out of it. he probably gets a fucking hard on everytime they argue or she threatens him like 💀💀💀 and abt the reunion thing like yeah,,, she'd be like "fucking try it" but she knows they're gonna meet again and she's probably looking forward to it like. ok. imagine them missing each other while he's in arkham like she's kinda bored without him, he misses fucking with her and they're both low-key pining. like i just know he breaks out just to see her sometimes bc he misses her. like she hears that he's missing from his cell and she's like. oh fuck here we go again and he lures her in and then he's just like. hi. i missed u. and she's like oh for fucks sake really???! but they end up spending time together bc <33

and yes he'd literally love it when she calls him eddie like he'd lose his fucking mind. like i bet he doesn't like anyone else calling him eddie, it's always edward or the riddler but with her,,, it's eddie. and he KNOWS he's in deep shit when she breaks out edward or edward nashton. like as soon as she calls him by his full name he's like oh FUCK. im done. im done. also like. we haven't discussed names but it'd be so funny if she had a rly generic superhero name and he's like "really??? out of all the names??? i know you're more creative than that" and she's like "yo what the fuck you literally called yourself the riddler and you spend all day whining on live streams and coming up with riddles sit DOWN". but he'd have so many nicknames. literally anything that reminds him of her would he a nickname even if it's so fucking random. but he'd also call her sweetheart and love and darling too :')

[riddlerscumshot]

Batman's Chokehold pt. 2

NSFW!

words: 2,235

contains: handcuffs, choking, degradation, praise, unprotected sex

"And how much did you have to pay the guards to get me in here?"

It had been about two weeks since Bruce had last seen Edward, in person anyway. In his dreams he had seen him almost every night.

Bruce has been waking up in the middle of the night breaking a sweat and almost rock hard. He just can't get this stupid fucking man out of his head. He's starting to feel like he's in high school again, jerking off once when he wakes up from these dreams he's having, again in the shower, and once more before going to sleep. But nothing satisfies him.

He keeps thinking about the tight heat that was wrapped around his cock, and how wet everything felt from the lube. And he absolutely can't stop hearing those moans. God, he'd do anything to hear them in person just one more time.

"Shut up," The Batman replies.

The two of them stood in an interrogation room of sorts, but all there was in it was a metal table with two matching chairs. No two way mirror and not a single camera. Edward had noticed everything about the room as soon as the guards had shoved him in there, leaving him trapped in his chains. But he wasn't worried about that, he was too focused on Batman. He was wearing his whole bat suit get up, The Bruce Wayne could never be seen going into or leaving Arkham Asylum.

"You and I both know that's not going to happen," The Riddler responds.

"Shut up!" Bruce shouts as he grabs Edward by the head and slams his face sideways against the cold table. Ed would be lying if he said the action didn't make his dick twitch.

"So that's why you're here, came to fuck me just like you did last time. You wanna just bend me over this table and pound into me? How predictable!" Edward giggles.

Bruce flips him around and wraps his hand around his throat.

"Not exactly like last time. Get on your knees."

Edward drops at the command. When it comes down to it, he would do anything for Batman, anything at all. He wants to follow every order, do everything Bruce asks for.

Bruce is quick to undo his pants and pull his cock out, he's been ready for this all day. Edward licks his lips, preparing himself for what's about to happen. He slowly opens his mouth, flattening his tongue, welcoming Bruce's dick.

Bruce pushes his hips forward a bit, placing the tip of his cock gently on Edward's tongue, waiting.

Ed wraps his lips around it, bringing his tongue around the tip and over the slit, back and forth, up and down. He's never done this before, so he's just doing what he imagines would feel good. But judging by the groan Bruce let's out, he'd say he's doing pretty good.

Bruce rocks his hips forward and lets out a softer moan. Edward presses his tongue flat against the underside of Batman's cock, warmly accepting it.

"You look so good taking my cock, finally shutting you up, huh?" Bruce breathes out. Edward moans and nods his head. He then leans forward, taking more.

Slowly leaning his head back, then forward again, then once more but faster. Eventually Edward has a consistent speed as he bobs his head, taking just about half of The Batman's dick. But Bruce is having none of that. He rocks his hips forward again, pushing his cock further into The Riddler's hot mouth.

"Fuck, you're doing so good, such a good little whore for me. Bet you fucking love this, huh? Bet you're already hard."

Edward blushed, partially because of the mix of degrading praise, and partially because he was right. Edward's dick was pushed up against his uniform, straining to be free, so ready for a hand to wrap around it. It leaked precum as Bruce's dick hit the back of Edward's throat.

As the two worked together, Edward bobbing his head and Bruce thrusting, Bruce let out another moan. Edward was in heaven, he loved the feeling of Batman's cock filling up his mouth. He loved sucking on it, trying his best not to involve his teeth.

"Fuck, we need to stop this if I wanna last long enough to fuck that tight hole of yours."

Edward blushed again and pulled off of Bruce's dick. Bruce grabbed him under the elbows and helped him stand up, then put his hands on Edward's hips and lifted him onto the table. They stared at each other for a moment, just breathing. Then, Bruce crashed his lips against Edward's. The Riddler gasped into the kiss. My first kiss, our first kiss, he thought.

Bruce removes his lips and Edward whines, but soon moans when he feels Batman's mouth on his neck. Bruce peppers kisses up and down then up again, stopping just under Edward's jaw to suck and bite a mark onto him. He brain was running wild. He loved knowing that he was leaving love bites on Edward. He loved knowing that they would last for days and days.

"Gonna mark you up, make sure everyone in here knows that you're someone's bitch."

"Yes, yes, your bitch, Batsy." Edward loved feeling Bruce suck on his neck, he loved the feeling of blood vessels bursting as Bruce bit and pulled on his flesh.

Bruce groans into Ed's neck, latching on in a different spot a bit further down, and repeating the same action as before. Edward squirmed as his cock felt too hard to ignore. He tried to palm himself through his pants, but that proved to be quite hard with his hands chained up.

"Basty, please, touch me. I've been so good, Batsy. Promise i'll be even better." Edward moaned out.

"Hmm, is my little whore hard for me?"

"Yes, yes, so hard..." Edward groaned.

"And you want me to make you feel better, hmm?" Bruce spoke against his neck.

Edward rubbed his thighs together, but it wasn't helping in the least.

"Yes! Yes! Make me feel all better, Batsy!"

Bruce place his hand on The Riddler's chest and pushed him back on the table. He tucked his fingers into Edward's pants and said, "lift your hips."

Edward obliged. Anything for Batman.

Bruce pulled Edward's pants down to his ankles, and then wrapped his hand around his dick. Edward gasped.

"Is this what you want?"

"YES!" Ed bucked his hip up. He loved the feeling of Batman's hands on him. His thoughts were racing, but all they said were more, more, more.

Bruce brought his hand up to the tip, gathering precum, then took his hand back down The Riddler's thick shaft. Batman continues to pump his hand and he finds a nice rhythm.

Riddler is a moaning and squirming mess under him, thrusting his hips up toward Bruce's hand and back down again. At this point, he wasn't thinking, he was just letting his body do whatever it wanted. He moaned and whined as Batman continued to jerk him off.

Edward soon felt it, the build up in his gut, the need to thrust faster, harder. "Please, please, please..." he spoke.

"Please what?" Bruce asked.

"Can I cum, Batsy? Please, please, let me cum..." Edward moaned out.

"I'm sure you know by now, if you cum, I'm still gonna fuck you." Bruce said, slowing down his pace. Edward whined.

"It's okay, it's okay. I won't complain this time. I can take it. Please let me cum, I'll be so good for you." Edward would say anything right now if it meant he would feel the white hot release of his orgasm. He bucked his hips up into Bruce's hand to make up for his slow moving hand.

"Oh yeah? Gonna be a good little slut for me?"

"Yes, yes, so good..."

Bruce quickened his pumping, "Okay, I suppose you can cum for me."

Edward thrusted into his hand three more times and let out a whorish moan, nearly screaming as he came. God, he felt amazing, fucking brilliant, absolutely mind blown. Bruce rubbed him through his orgasm and watched Edward's face contort in his ecstasy, his mouth wide open but after a second, nothing came out. He was fucked speechless.

Bruce removed his hand and fumbled with the lube he had tucked onto his belt.

"Alright, legs up."

Edward complied with a hum, exposing his hole to Batman. Bruce took Edward's pants off the rest of the way and squirted a generous amount of lube onto his fingers and brought them to Edward's ass, pressing one in. Edward let out a whine.

Bruce continues to fuck The Riddler with his finger, in and out, in and out, until he's ready for another.

When Bruce adds his second finger, he presses it deeper than before, bending and curling them until he hears Edward let out a yelp.

Ed was panting and gasping for air as his dick twitched. Bruce thrusted his fingers out and back in, hitting his prostate again. He spread his fingers apart, then back together a few times before adding a third and final finger, pumping it in and out.

His focus was interrupted when Edward let out a moan as Bruce hit his spot again. He looked between Edward's legs and realized he was half hard already.

"Look at you, already wanting to cum again. What a slut."

Edward just moaned in response, unable to find the right words.

Bruce pulled his finger out and rubbed the leftover lube on his aching cock. He lined himself up with Edward's hole and Ed gasped. Slowly, Bruce pushed in. He groaned as he bottomed out, hips pressed against Edward's ass.

"God, baby, you feel so good."

Edward's head was spinning. He called me baby. I'm his baby.

As Bruce pulled almost all the way out, then pushed back in, Edward let a moan escape his lips. Bruce did it again, angling his hips just a little different this time, and Edward moaned again, this time louder, letting Bruce know he had hit his sweet spot.

The Batman's hand crept up Edward's torso and around his neck, using it as a way to steady himself as he pulled out and thrusted back in faster and faster. He gently squeezed his fingers around The Riddler's throat and he let out a squeak, then a moan.

If Edward thought he was in heaven earlier, he wanted to know what this could be. He didn't have a care in the world. He didn't care that Batman was the reason he was locked up, he didn't care that he had to wait two weeks for this, he didn't care.

Bruce's cock filled him up, then left him empty over and over and over.

"Please, Batsy, harder, faster, please."

Ask and you shall receive. Batman fucked into Edward's hole his all his might, hitting his prostate dead on, erupting yet another moan from Edward. He went limp, loving the feeling of being a ragdoll for Bruce to use.

"So fucking good for me, what a good fucking whore. Love the way i fill you up..." Bruce rambled. he squeezed his hand even tighter around Edward's neck, making him moan at the feeling. Everything felt perfect.

"Batsy, y'feel s'good. Love your cock..." Edward moaned out. He wiggled and squirmed under Batman, almost screaming as his prostate was his over and over.

Bruce could tell by his slurred words that Edward was close, and so was he. He fucked and fucked and fucked into Edward. Wanting so bad to see the way his jaw dropped as he came.

"Such a good boy, so good for me." Bruce said as he let go of his throat and wrapped his hand around Edward's dick. Edward gasped and moaned at the feeling, begging Bruce to jerk him off.

"Please, please, v'been so good. I wanna cum so bad..."

"I know, I know. Cum for me, baby."

As Bruce watched Ed's mouth fall open, he felt the tide in his stomach pull back, and slowly crash through him. Before he knew it he was cumming into Edward's hole, deep inside him.

"Fuck!" He yelled out, fucking into Edward a few more times to wear off his orgasm.

After standing and panting for a moment, Bruce pulled out, letting his cum spill out of Edward. Edward just layed there, not being able to move as his dick still twitched from his orgasm. This is the best he's felt in his entire life, he didn't want it to end.

But alas, he felt Bruce sliding his legs back into his pants pulling them up to his thighs.

"Stand up."

Edward did as he was told, even though he felt as though he might fall. Bruce pulled Edward's pants up the rest of the way. Edward knew this was goodbye. He wanted to bad to reach out and hug The Batman but he soon remembered the handcuffs that restricted him.

"I'm gonna miss you, Batsy..." Edward says.

"Yeah, yeah." Bruce says as he tucks himself into his pants.

Bruce looks up at Edward, placed a hand on his cheek, and leaned in to kiss him. Edward got butterflies in his stomach, he was sure that he would get them every time The Batman kisses him.

Bruce pulls back and mutters, "I'll miss you too." before turning toward the door and leaving.

[skye707]

Heya Skye! Have some bread, ya deserve and need it 🍞 !!

Also, I’ve got a question. What do each of the Riddler’s think of the (not so) good doctor Crane?

I'm so glad that people are on board with the spook train as well as the Riddlemobile.

(and I am going to town on that bread. I am a fiend for bread.)

Unburied - Legitimately scared of Dr. Crane. Will not interact with him under any circumstances. Would never admit it, but sometimes he has nightmares concerning dear old Jonny.

ZY - It's kind of like the interaction that happens when you put the nerd and the slacker together for a group project. ZY has the charisma to get the conversation going, and Crane is doing the actual heavy lifting. Not ZY's first choice of company, but when it comes to friends, he'll take what he can get.

Dano - This can go one of two ways: "this guy is scary. I like it :)" or "holy fuck what the fuck is wrong with this guy". Someone he can't use scare tactics and hysterical panic on to do his bidding? Either his new best friend or his new biggest threat.

YJ - He would try to be friends, but soon realizes that this guy is in a whole other league of villainy. Being an international cyber threat and criminal is cool, but this guy uses biochemistry to scare people? to death?? YIKES!

Gotham - What the kid? The scarecrow kid from that one bizarre case in his GCPD days? Don't make him laugh. As if he'd be scared of a teenager with a sack over his head. Nothing the Riddler can't handle.

BTAA - They have a working relationship and that's it. If you think he's getting cozy with that sadistic S.O.B. you must have a few screws loose. Not that he couldn't deal with him! He is the artist of crime after all, but Crane doesn't have the same respect for the arts as Eddie Nygma. (Please don't tell him he said that)

Arkham - One of the only people he gets along with. That might be due to Jonathan's saintly patience with him, but it works. Meetings and conversations are quick and to the point, but when your usual company consists of rats and opossums you aren't picky.

BTAS - I don't care if the two of them never interact in the show, they are best friends. This is the strongest iteration of the dork squad in my opinion and I will die on this hill. Just two nerds (and Jervis of course) who are sick and tired of stupid people. Get up to the best capers.

Telltale - Over time, his view of Crane has changed. At first, he didn't see Jonathan as anything more than a fanatical ex-scientist. Now as they have both grown older, they have a mutual understanding with one another. Just two very old men trying to win one more time.

[anystalker707]

Riddle me this

Pairing: Mikey x Reader Gotham! AU Word count: ~ 3 300 Genre: Enemies to lovers Warning: happens in an asylum / mentions of death / paranoia Summary: (Y/n) meets Mikey at the Arkham Asylum for the criminally insane. Mikey has a plan to get them out of there, but his main focus is (y/n).

“Riddle me this,” a guy suddenly sits down in front of me, adjusting his glasses, and another plops down by my side, just watching me with a wide smile. “What belongs to you, but other people use it more than you?”

Both seem to have been in this hellhole for long enough. Take or give a few months, considering the dark circles around their eyes and rather uncared-for hair. I mean, the riddle guy actually seems to actually care about being tidied up, his black and white striped uniform not as wrinkled as the shorter guy’s, whose hair is all messy. They still look good, to be honest. Am I a trustworthy person to judge this, though? It doesn’t matter. The reason they’re somewhere like this – like the Arkham Asylum – is still clear among their manners.

They don’t match the whole Arkham vibe, too. Both of them stick out compared to the light gray walls and dark gray metal grids, and don’t seem to be the kind of people to eat jelly with goo and meds everyday.

“My name,” I sigh, raising an eyebrow at him. “What’s yours?”

“Mikey Way.” He smiles, leaning forward with his arms folded over the table. “Also, the Riddler.”

“And I’m Frank,” the one beside me says, “Frank Iero.”

I look at him for a moment. “The Penguin?”

Frank scowls. “No. It’s Frank Iero.”

“Of course." I shrug, humming. Not like he’s known in the underworld, after that bullet injury made him start limping weirdly, but it’s fine, at least now I have names to the faces and vice-versa because most of the information I had resumed itself to what McCracken spilled about them since I’ve never wandered around the Gotham City Police Department or Taylor’s territory enough. “So, what gives me the honor of having the former GCPD Forensic Science Technician and Corey Taylor’s former umbrella boy sitting at my table?”

Both share a look as their smiles widen, with another feeling laying under it.

“And what’s your name?” Mikey leans forward, eyes deep into mine.

“You’re clever, Mikeyway.” I copy his motion. “You must have heard about me in the news.” I raise an eyebrow, looking at him up and down. “Seven murders in a row, an art gallery heist.”

“Like if I needed these sorts of tips.” Frank rolls his eyes. “You’re (l/n), of course.” Mikey furrows his eyebrows, shooting a glance at him, earning himself a wide smirk. “Being the umbrella boy does give me some privileges.” And there’s this unspoken argument between the two in which Frank only smirks smugly under the other’s glare – what’s their plan?

“Are you going to answer my question, or…?” I rub my face, leaning back. If they aren’t going anywhere with this, I’m going to take a fucking nap because looking good doesn’t mean not being boring. “I don’t have all day.”

“In fact, you do.” Mikey grins.

“I’m not obligated to sit here and watch you two keep your little secrets to yourselves.” I mock Mikey, receiving a hum in response whilst he adjusts his glasses. “And I literally just got here! Can’t I have a moment of peace without having a cop wanting to hold a gun to my temple for a second, please? People are still trying to find me a swing from the rope, don’t you think I should have some peace until then?”

“Don’t worry, you’re not getting any of these.” Frank shakes his head, moving to sit sideways on the bench, facing me though he observes our surroundings instead, boredly. Not like there’s a lot to do in a place full of lunatics like this.

“The chair, then?” I raise my eyebrows. “Wouldn’t look so good.”

“Well, maybe, you’re getting something better,” Mikey cuts in. “Much better, actually. Something you really want. Please don’t say lethal injection,” he says quickly – I throw my arms in the air. “It has no cost when you have it, but is priceless when it is taken away, it can be sold, bought or given, but is merely a path where you choose the way.” Both Frank and I turn to him at the same time, with the same glare that makes him sigh and roll his eyes. “You two are no fun.”

Frank scoffs dryly, his attention averting to somewhere else once again. “Not all of us have patience to hear your stupid little riddles, Way. No wonder why no one likes you.”

Something lingers in Mikey’s expression, this feeling he probably doesn’t know how to deal with yet, so he suppresses it, maybe not even consciously. “Freedom,” he says plainly.

“Freedom? Like– What?” I glance around before lowering my voice to a whisper-yell. “How the fuck are you running away from here? Even more you two dumbasses. You can’t even pretend to be friends enough to be in this together.” Their stares burn into my back – not the two’s, it’s theirs. The staff also wants to kill me. Of course they do. But what if the two also want to kill me and I’m just a token they’re bringing together to be left back at the last moment as a distraction?

“Okay, but hear me out, we have a good plan!” Frank whisper-yells in return. He seems dumber than Mikey, to be honest, but at least he knows how to deal with the underworld and he’s not some guy relying solely on his intelligence – he killed his way up in the Taylor crime family. Maybe this can work if they combine Mikey’s brain and Frank’s experience, which seems to actually be the hardest task of them all. “Hear me out, we are going to–”

“Doesn’t Wentz want your head?” I raise an eyebrow at him, thinking. “You know how he had an eye on you after you told on him. And then you tried to kill Taylor, right?” It was Wentz’s immediate one-way ticket away from the Taylor crime family to whatever other gang in the underworld he decided to join. I guess he was doing jobs for McCracken when I was caught?

Frank hums, looking away with a sigh. “That’s not the point. I’m not even alone in this.”

“Okay, but why do you need me?” What’s even the point of choosing a random idiot like me since they can have whatever mastermind they find in here. Well, maybe not – the only fucker who doesn’t get startled by a minimal sound and has to make newspaper hats is Dominic Harrison and that guy has the corners of his lips cut into a smile. Aside from him, I think there's this Damiano guy who rarely shows up. He actually has a newspaper top hat. Some sort of Mad Hatter wannabe. Nevermind, he’s another one without a single brain cell, he speaks in rhymes. Maybe I really am the best option, but how do they know that?

“Because we need you to help us overthrow Taylor.” Mikey smiles wide, something glinting in his eyes. “We’re gathering everyone.”

“Everyone? Who the fuck do you mean by everyone? Who the hell are you going to find in a place like this?” I look around the room, seeing a really tall and strong looking man run into the wall and laugh as he falls back. “I’m starting to think you’re just as crazy as everyone! What will you tell me next? Gonna ask me to do push ups in drag?”

Frank cracks a loud laugh, making both of us look at him. “Sorry, I’m sorry!” He covers his face, though continues to laugh. Dumbass.

“You’re smart as well,” Mikey hums, looking at me from up and down. “And we heard about you. Seven murders and an art gallery heist is just what they can find proof for, isn’t it?” His lips curl up into a smile – how can I punch it off his face without getting in trouble? “Y’know, I’m not just a police pawn.”

“But you’re certainly not the king.” And he would be a very bad one if he was.

“But I’m an excellent knight.”

~

Exercising time. Or maybe just outdoors and peace time because I really want a break from climbing all these buildings and running down alleys, not to mention I’m not socializing with these people. Not in this lifetime.

The whole concrete structure makes this place feel a lot hotter than it actually is and it is absolutely ridiculous how I am limited to be pressed against this fucking wall so I will get the minimum of shadow without being scolded. Idiots. They just want to shove meds down our throats, but could they handle it if we decided to actually rebel against them? I don’t think so.

“I hate how they banned me from there.” Dominic suddenly says, sitting down beside me. His scars look worse from close. Did he make them by himself? “They claimed I don’t have sportsmanship. Bullshit. Not my fault if they can’t handle it.”

“You’re playing with idiots, Dominic,” I sigh, “and it’s dodgeball. Not rugby.”

“It’s Yungblud, not Dominic.” He purses his lips. He should moisturize them. “But still. They could do better. Anyways, I’m not here to talk about how great I am at sports.”

“You’re not even good at sports at all, Yungblud.”

“Riddler and Penguin also approached you, right?” He narrows his eyes and I follow his gaze to Mikey poorly trying to cope with the staff as he messily does jumping jacks while Frank is aiming a ball at him. Such a wonderful relationship. “Like, they seem crazy. I don’t think they’ll be going anywhere. Damiano thinks the same.” Okay, so I guess they did approach the ones who don’t jump at the quietest sound and don’t need to be explained the same thing over and over. But Damiano? Though I heard he does have this silly little pocket watch to hypnotize people.

“We can make a deal.”

“Deal?”

“I will fix you a place in McCracken’s crime family while you help me escape from here.” Because Bert probably won’t mind two extra stupid dumbasses working for him as long as they do whatever he wants, and probably they will. Or not. Not my problem once I’m out of here. “We are three, the dumbasses are two and they can’t even get along well. I think we can handle this.”

“Heard their plan, tho?” He raises an eyebrow – I shake my head. “Thought so. They said they won’t tell until it’s time.”

“I hate them.” I shake my head.

“Welcome to the club,” he laughs, which doesn’t sound like how any sane person would sound.

Yungblud’s words, however, stick to my mind and I notice how little I actually know about them. Are they really going to use me – maybe the other guys as well – as some sort of distraction so they can escape for real? Is it a plan to get us in trouble? I mean, Frank already knew me.

“Good morning!” Mikey grins, placing his tray beside mine as he takes the next seat. Without Frank this time. “Here goes a little thing to help you wake up!”

“What makes you think I slept, in the first place?” This place is terrible even at night. I swear they fill these beds with bricks and the ones who are too noisy during the night should be kept somewhere else because some of us actually want to sleep. I thankfully don’t have a cellmate. Roommate.

“You measure my life in hours and I serve you by expiring. I'm quick when I'm thin and slow when I'm fat. The wind is my enemy,” he finishes. Is Mikey ever in a bad mood? Aside from when he’s around Frank, of course. Frank can be a sweetheart, though, yesterday I saw him with the cutest confused face on while trying to figure out what Yungblud was telling us, something none of us probably understood, but had no choice other than pretend to pay attention to him at the moment he approached the three of us having dinner.

“A candle.” I shrug. “But that’s not what I meant to talk with you.”

“Oh, you wanted to talk with me?” He smiles, but it’s not that happy little smile or the fake one he does whenever talking to the others – it’s the same one he has on when he proposes a riddle.

“Don’t be weird about it.” I furrow my eyebrows, glancing at him before I proceed to open the juice box. It better not be like yesterday. That fucking toilet water.

“I’m not being weird about it.” He also opens his juice box, but I don’t think he is going to drink it. He didn’t drink it yesterday. “I’m just happy you were thinking about me since, y’know, you wanted to talk to me.”

“Yes, you’re being weird. You saying you’re happy feels almost impossible.” I sigh, scooping some of the grey goo in my spoon. It’s not even a metal one. Pathetic. “Unless it’s about blood, crime or anything that gets you on the news while getting revenge against Gotham. Do you want to kill me or something? What’s in your mind, Mikeyway?”

“If you’ve got me, you want to share me; if you share me, you haven’t kept me. What am I?”

“I hurt when kept, yet more when received. I’m sometimes the easiest to express, but the hardest to ignore. I’m hard to control, yet worse if let show. What am I?” I twist my mouth bitterly, glaring at him.

“You don’t hate me, (y/n),” Mikey chuckles, shaking his head whilst organizing the food around his plate. The rubber meat, the goo and theoretical salad.

“Oh, but I will, if you continue keeping your secrets.” I bring the spoon to my mouth and the goo is… very not pleasing. Maybe that’s where all the newspaper goes and that’s why it’s grey. Makes a lot of sense.

“Well, I don’t hate you, at least.” He shrugs. “It is found between two opposite poles, among lovers, a force that pushes ones together.”

Attraction. I sigh. “Not everyone is able to solve your silly little riddles?” I raise an eyebrow, pulling a bag of chips from my pocket because I’m totally not eating newspaper puret. “Not amused. I’ve never heard Damiano actually say something coherent. I usually give up on paying attention after the first rhyme.”

“How did you get this?” Mikey furrows his eyebrows, nodding at my chips.

“Some of the inmates have special food and they’re not careful enough.” I shrug. One of them had it in their tray and it only took a smile and a feigned compliment to take the chips without being noticed. Same with the plate of actual salad that was snatched when another one turned around to look at whoever had poked the shoulder opposite to my side, totally not me. “Why, Mikeyway? You want some? Unlike you, I’m nice and I know how to share.” I hold the bag of chips out, just to pull it away once he reaches for them. “Under conditions, of course.”

“I’m not too desperate for food,” he sighs.

~

“You know,” I mumble, looking at the cards at the table then at the card in my hands before tossing one of them on the pile. “You’re not that bad.”

“Of course I’m not that bad.” Mikey tosses another card to the pile and I sigh, needing to get another card from the deck. And another, until I find a good one to carelessly toss it at the pile, too. “I’m smart.”

“I don’t mean it like this.” I roll my eyes. “Not as in the game, but as in a person at all, but I’m starting to regret saying it.” He doesn’t look up from his cards, adjusting his glasses and taking a long look over each one of them before finally choosing one. “Like, I’m starting to think you’ve got some feelings in there and not just riddles and hatred for Frank.”

“I’m much more than hatred for Frank.” Mikey shrugs.

“Yeah, like riddles, crimes…” I trail off, letting another one of my cards join the pile. “...hatred also towards Yungblud, Damiano, me, then love towards art… Do you like art?”

“Yes, I do like art, (y/n).” Something lies underneath his calmness. “And I also like you.”

“You’re bad at expressing your feelings, then.” I sigh at the card he throws and shake my head, letting the smirk spread across his face so I can have the pleasure of watching it disappear at the sight of my next card – he grabs more cards from the deck. “Or not. Like, if you like me, I’m sorry about how you treat others.”

“You haven’t left, though.” He tilts his head, getting rid of another card. “Do you like the abuse? Fucking masochist.”

A chuckle escapes my lips helplessly as I watch my card land on top of the pile. “Maybe. Maybe not. Why? Would you like it, hun? Does it turn you on?”

“What if it does?” He cracks a side smile.

“Then fuck you, you disgusting sadist.” I chuckle again, seeing the card he threw, and toss my last one over it, declaring my victory. “I mean, sadists aren’t really disgusting. You are. But it’s okay, I like you too, Riddler.”

Mikey rolls his eyes, pulling the cards together and organizing them so he can shuffle them and we can start another game – which I’ll hopefully win as revenge after his consecutive victories on chess earlier –, just for our plans to be ruined once a fucking ball lands on the table, sending the cards flying everywhere.

“Who the fuck–” I widen my eyes once I see Damiano and Yungblud looking our way, frozen, so I stand up with my hands against the table. “I thought you two weren’t fucking allowed to even touch the fucking balls! Fuck you, I hope you get the sedative next time!” I throw the ball back at them, though too messily – my skills aren’t for that. The two, of course, just run away laughing to themselves while someone starts shouting in the background, probably someone from the staff who caught the two with a fucking ball.

A sigh escapes my lips once they are out of sight. Mikey is already under the table picking up the cards, so I join him, starting by the ones close to me. He’s focused on the cards near him, picking them up carefully, hence I reach for the same one, on purpose – his hand threatens to draw back at bumping mine, but I hold onto it. A shaky exhale escapes his lips and he glances at me before finally meeting my eyes.

“(Y/n)?” He raises an eyebrow.

“I want something,” I say softly, helplessly grinning. Before he can say anything, I quickly start, “of no use to one, yet absolute bliss to two. The small boy gets it for nothing. The young man has to lie or work for it. The old man has to buy it. The babys right, the lovers’ privilege, the hypocrites’ mask. To the young girl, faith; to the married woman, hope; to the old maid, charity.”

Something glints in Mikey’s eyes and he presses his lips together into a thin line before he is leaning in, too, meeting my lips halfway. His lips are actually soft despite feeling like they’re picked at, most likely a habit Mikey has whenever nervous aside from nodding and mumbling to himself as if he is teaching someone while dealing with his own stuff. His kiss is exactly what I imagined it to be – tender and careful. His hand closes around mine gently.

“Y’know, I hadn’t expected to meet someone who sparked my interest in a place like this,” Mikey breathes, adjusting his glasses.

“Gonna be fucking romantic to run away from here together, though, won’t it?” I chuckle – for once, Mikey chuckles too, without sarcasm or bitterness.

____________________

Tagging list: @lubbockshusband

[chocolate1721]

I haven’t seen a lot of the class touring Arkham fics anymore, so here’s my prompt. Ok more salt and rogue trying to adopt Marinette.

So the class is touring Arkham. They were walking through the cafeteria or recreation room, their guide was rushing them because the inmates are due to come any minute. Lila slows down and trips Marinette, then she kicks Marinette’s sketchbook across the room. The class leave Marinette behind while she is scrambling for her book. When she looks up she finds two of Gotham’s Rogues in front of her.

Harley and Ivy weren’t expecting to have anything exciting to happen. There has been gossip about a foreign class touring Arkham, but other than that it’s been pretty quiet. They walked into the recreation room and froze. There is a child there. There is a child by herself there. They immediately went over to her, and they saw shock in her eyes when she saw them.

“Hey there girlie whatcha doing here by yourself?” Harley asks her gently.

“Uhm, my class and I are on a tour, but it looks like they forgot me.”

Harley and Ivy steered her towards an abandoned sofa and sat on either side of her. They soon got her to spill what’s happened. Harley went into ‘therapist’ mode. Marinette didn’t know how long she was talking about her problems, but she soon had her head in Harley’s lap while Harley strokes her hair.

Once all of the tears have been shed. Marinette showed them her designs. Some based on Gotham architecture, some based on the vigilantes, finally presenting outfits based on them. Ivy and Marinette start talking about making an eco friendly fabric. Harley knoticed what time it is and walks over to the door. She bangs on it a few times to get someone’s attention.

[[More]]

“What is it?”

“You know that French tour from earlier?”

“Yeah what about it?”

Harley moves enough for him to see Marinette talking passionately with Ivy. “I think that left someone behind.”

The worker pales drastically. They ran like a bat outta hell to get their superiors. This news ran up the chain of command until it got to Gordon.

Gordon was having a stressful evening. The Joker recently escaped, there were more muggings this past week than usual, and now he gets a call from Arkham. Only telling him to get over there as fast as possible. Not knowing what he is going up against he called Batman.

Batman and Red Hood arrived at Arkham. As they approach Gordon to see what’s going on they hear a worker panically describing how he found a French child in the room surrounded by the inmates. Red Hood demands to know which room. Once getting the info they both rush to the room. They were expecting the worse: torturing, beatings, crying. What they were NOT expecting is a small French girl braiding Poison Ivy’s hair while having Harley Quinn braid her own hair.

“The riddler should be shot and his clothes should be burned, then the ashes have to be scattered at the four corners of the world. The different shade of green on that man is more than a forest. Like, having a green themed outfit is fine. Wearing it everyday is fine. But what is NOT FINE is whereing every shade of green PLUS purple question marks. It’s like he’s asking to be slapped!” Marinette ranted.

Red Hood grabbed Batman’s shoulder and pulled him out of the room. He turned fully to Batman, placing both hands on his shoulders, he started shouting. “YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO ADOPT HER! DO YOU HEAR ME! SHE IS TOO PURE AND INNOCENT! I WILL NOT ALLOW YOU TO CORRUPT HER!”

Batman just brushes him off and (glides? Shadow melts? Skulks?) into the room.

“I’m sorry to interrupt, but may I ask what is going on?”

Marinette yelps in suprise. Spinning around to come face-to-face with the dark knight himself. “Uh-um-I-I-I-“

“She won a scholarship for her class. They were taking a tour today and left her behind. She said she has been bullied by the class for a while, and there is this one girl lying about everything.” Harley intervened for Marinette.

“Hmmm, you won the Martha Wayne scholarship?” Marinette nods shyly. Batman kneels down to be eye level with Mari. “What’s your name?”

Marinette looks at him and smiles brightly. “My name’s Marinette.”

After being dazzled by her bright, sunshine smile. (Red Hood is in the background being the dramatic ass he is shielding his eyes and yelling “TOO BRIGHT”) Batman then speaks up. “Your class wasn’t supposed to tour Arkham.”

Marinette freezes. “I’m sorry, what?!”

“Arkham is far too dangerous to tour. Who decided that the class was to come her.” Batman questioned her as they walked towards the door.

Before she could answer Harley interrupted. “Oi, Batsy! You can’t adopt her! She is our baby!”

“That isn’t up to you Harley.” Batman retorted.

“I told you earlier Bats, you’re not adopting another one” Hood spoke up.

“B-b-but I already have parents” Marinette informs them.

“It’s ok sweet pea we adopted you emotionally.” Ivy soothes.

“Ok let’s go inform Gordon what happened.” Red Hood directs her to the commissioner while Batman stepped away to make a few calls. He then calls Marinette’s parents, and tells them what happened. They give him permission to watch over their daughter.

By the time he walks back to where Marinette is, both her and Red Hood are ready to go. Hood helps Marinette into the back of the Batmobile, then climbs in next to Batman. Batman then turns to Marinette. “I called Mr. Wayne and informed him of what happened. He told me to bring you to his house, he wants to know what made yours class think you had a to of Arkham.”

“Thank you Mr. Batman.”

Marinette gets out of the batmobile and meets Alfred at the door. Batman calls Red Robin. “Red Robin I want you to find out why the class went to Arkham today.”

“10-4 B”.

By the time everyone returned from the cave Red Robin had what he needed.

“So it turns out one of the students made a fake email, under your name and told the teacher that they had a tour that was left off of the schedule. Then sent an email to Arkham to have them expect them.”

“Who was the student?”

“A Lila Rossi.”

“Hmmmm it seems like we will have to keep an eye on the situation.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ok so now it’s a few days later and the class is at Wayne Enterprise taking a tour. When the Riddler suddenly takes them hostage.

“Which one of you is Marinette?” Riddlers demanded

The class has no hesitation when pushing Marinette into the him. Marinette quickly regains her balance and squared up to him.

“What do you want with me.”

The Riddler gets close to her face in a dramatically scary way. Then quickly backs up and shows off his outfit. “I heard you don’t think I’m stylish.”

This is all the invitation that Marinete needed. She lays into him. No mercy.

“Absolutely. It’s worse in person than in the pictures!”

The Riddler gasps dramatically. “How dare-“

“Oh I dare. I dare I can redesign your entire wardrobe and make it look 10 times better.”

As all the hostages are being saved the class tries to leave, only to be stopped by an officer.

“Ma’am I’m sorry but you have to stay and give your statements.”

Bustier was insisting that it was too dangerous for them to stay there. If the police want their statements then they can come to their hotel and get them. The officer motions to the bus driver to not leave. The bus driver is more than happy to stay put. He is sick and tired of this ungrateful class.

Not too long after, Marinette and the Riddler walk out. The Riddler looks excited about his new clothes. He is so ready he heads straight to Gordon. He asks Gordon if he can have a package delivered to Arkham. Gordon is suspicious until Marinette shows him her designs. Gordon agrees.

As everyone is giving their statements Lois Lane arrives. Alya is extatic, she thanks Lila for getting her an interview with her idol. Only to turn around and see her idol interviewing Marinette.

Lois marches towards the girl who seems to be at the center of all this. A small girl standing next to the Riddler. She approaches her and asks for an interview. The girl agrees but apologizes in advance for any miscommunication between them. Lois asks her what happened. Marinette explained how the Riddler came to see if she really didn’t like his clothes and how she ended up redesigning them.

“But how would he know you didn’t like them?”

“Maybe Aunt Harley and Aunt Ivy told him?” Marinette shrugs.

“Wait! As in Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy?! How do you know them?!”

“Oh we met when my class left me behind in Arkham.” Marinette says nonchalantly.

Everyone around them freezes.

Caline quickly comes over and starts telling Lois that “you can’t trust everything she says. We are from France, so she most likely misunderstood you.” She continues to try and pass of Marinette as incompetent, troubled, attention seeking, and being a bad role model for the other students. All of this is caught on camera.

Bustier then roughly guides Marinette back to the class.

As Lois is processing this, the officer that stopped the class from leaving came over and explained what the class did. Leaving that same student behind in a hostage situation, then demanding to leave. Lois is horrified.

Both she and the officer go to Gordon and ask if they can use the body cameras of the officers there in the story.

Gordon immediately agrees. Once he knows why.

The story ran that very night.