#i like that hes forced to confront himself and what hes done
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That's really not how I read it. First, Dick is one of the characters - in general and in the Batfamily - who spends the most time obsessing over the morality of his actions, over the no-killing rule, over the way he can control his emotions so that he doesn't use uneccessary violence, and continuously lectures people on that. Obviously this started with Kory in New Teen Titans, and this was one of the main reasons he was so reluctant to date her early on. And we have numerous examples of Dick having the same conversation with other people : Helena, Tad Ryerstad, Tarantula, Babs herself, without counting the villains (there are several examples of Dick teaming-up with a villain and repeating to them they have to do things his way or the team-up's over, like Dick did with Deathstroke in Titans 1999).
I do not understand how you can look at a guy like that and think he'd kill for the greater good/he's not as convinced about the no-killing rule as Bruce is/it's just a matter of control for him. It's actually the plot of an arc of Justice League Task Force, where Dick replaces Batman on a mission with Aquaman, Martian Manhunter, Wally and Gipsy (yes I know), when they were tasked with the destruction of a terrible weapon used by rebels in a dictatorship. At one point Dick is told by the UN liaison he should be the one taking out the dictator, and while the dictator run toward the weapon Dick tries to aim at him but can't bring himself to kill him. It is revealed Dick was chosen for this specifically because the liaison knew he was the one member of the team who wouldn't kill, and he knew the dictator would take himself out with the weapon.
Dick is Mr "That's not the way we do things" and "This isn't the way".
Did he want to hurt the Joker badly ? Yes. He went to see the Joker to get revenge, but there's not enough evidence to suggest he went there with the intention of killing him. Your evidence is that 1) Dick expressed, grieving and full of rage, that he wanted to kill the Joker, 2) he punched Dinah when she tried to prevent him from confronting the Joker, 3) he meant serious business when he went there and wasn't quipping.
For the first point, I don't understand why people look at grief and rage-fuelled moments when Dick said he wanted someone dead and take it as face value, as if this truly represented what Dick wanted - Dick. Dick's had those kinds of moments all the time. As early as New Teen Titans, he told Kommand'r that he wanted to rip her from limb to limb after it appeared she'd killed Kory, for example. He threatened multiple people to hurt them badly or even kill them if they'd done something to Tim. He dreamed of killing Blockbuster after what he did. Many other characters have done the same thing.
And you can't look at this one picture of Dick dragging his hand down his face saying he knows killing the Joker isn't the way and not tell me he hasn't calmed down slightly after the rage-fuelled moment he just had and isn't agreeing with Babs that killing the Joker isn't the way to deal with him.
Why is that important ? That shows Dick's still somewhat in control - he isn't in a muderous haze.
So why would Dinah try to prevent him from confronting the Joker ? And why would Dick punch her ?
Dinah wanted to prevent him from going because why wouldn't she ? She knew Dick was grieving and full of righteous rage and was going there to harm the Joker (again not necessarily kill him). Of course she would try to reason with him, to stop him. A vigilante going to see a person who's killed their loved ones and hurt them while being full of rage can only mean bad things.
And Dick did want to hurt the Joker, so of course he wasn't going to let someone stop him. Yet he still took the time to apologize to Dinah - does that sound like someone going to commit first-degree murder ? Or are we implying Dick's a boy-scout even when he's on a killing spree ?
Then he went into the church. Of course he was serious. Dick stops quipping whenever the stakes become higher in general, and he's downright chilly/intense when he's that angry. Even his speak bubbles reflected that when he sent Blockbuster's armies in the hospital.
But even then, for some reason people forget this guy was there :
The guy's entire power is to bring out the hate and loathing in everyone around him - so a form of mind manipulation if not mind control - he used that power to cause murders, and you're telling me this didn't have any influence over the situation ? Having him there was intentional, on the writer's and maybe the Joker's part.
But to me, this kind of panel is evidence enough Dick didn't come to the church with the intention of killing the Joker :
Dick didn't really want to kill the Joker, and that's embodied by the fact that the Joker said he didn't "want it enough" while dodging a punch from Dick and landing one of his own.
If Dick'd really come here to kill the Joker, he wouldn't have wasted time landing a few kicks and a few punches that couldn't truly kill him but sent the Joker flying. He wouldn't have wasted time asking the Joker "All the deaths ! All the pain ! When is enough enough, Joker ?". He wouldn't have let the Joker land his own punches. He certainly wouldn't have stopped right in the middle of the killing spree.
If Dick had wanted the Joker's death when he came into the church, he would've landed a killing blow right away and it would've been over in seconds.
The Joker knew that if he wanted Dick to lose control, he'd have to goad him further (by stopping while the Joker was on his knees, Dick was maybe already calming down slightly !), so that's why he brought up Jason. That's when Dick lost control and started pummelling the Joker. It was quick, relentless, and that's when the Joker's heart stopped.
Tim's apparent death caused Dick to want to hurt the Joker terribly and that's why he came to the church. The mention of Jason is the moment Dick lost control and actually started pummelling the Joker to death, though again there was Mr "My power literally incites others to riot and murder others" rejoicing in the corner.
One last thing : Dick never said he'd murdered the Joker or called himself a murderer - he made a reference to the rage he'd felt when he killed the Joker during the Vesper Fairchild affair, but he never said he'd gone in the church planning on killing the Joker. In many ways, I think that's why Blockbuster's death hit him even harder : even though he was on the verge of a panic attack when he stepped aside and was emotionally exhausted, this to him must have felt more of a conscious decision and thus a murder than was the case for Joker. And this time Dick did call it murder, and declared himself complicit in the murder of Blockbuster.
Otherwise, it wouldn't make sense that Dick was only self-flagellating a little when he thought the Joker was dead (before he was revived) but went into a full-blown panic attack after Blockbuster died, saying he'd failed Bruce and was poisonous.
There's an escalation in the level of reaction that doesn't make sense if Dick "killing" Joker was a premeditated murder and not an accident (partially caused by mind manipulation).
It's only because the narrative treats it as a big deal that it is one - that, and Dick getting depressed and full of self-loathing after. Meanwhile, Tim killed Lady Shiva while he was on Amarilla (in a smilar rage-fuelled moment), revived her, and later said she owed him her life (the little rascal lmao), and nobody bats an eye.
I've heard that Nightwing killed the joker in one of the comics? Possibly caused by Jason Todd's death? Can you shed light onto this?
Sure thing! SO, the infamous moment you are talking about is in Joker: Last Laugh #6. Dick does indeed kill the Joker, his heart stops. Youâve probably seen this moment on posts as an example of Dickâs legendary temper (rightly so, there is definitely a lot of rage involved here) but I think because of the emphasis on Dickâs emotionality, people really downplay how premeditated it all was. Dick hears that Tim is dead because of Jokerâs schemes, and he decides to kill the Joker. Full stop.Â
Barbara tries to talk him out of it and Canary tries to stop him, but Nightwing knocks Canary out and goes off on his own. Barbara and Batman know that Nightwing is going to kill the Joker, and both try to stop him. Seeing him walk to where the Joker is, a man on a mission, zero quips/flips, really hammered it home that he was genuinely planning on taking Joker out for good.Â
So yeah, this wasnât just beating Joker up and going a little too far in his anger, this was premeditated, first-degree murder. It is probably the only time Nightwing has ever gone after someone with the intent to kill. And it is very personal too...Nightwing didnât have a gun or anything to take Joker out quickly from a distance. Beating Joker to death with his bare hands was drawn out. It was up close and vicious.Â
Now, this is my opinion on things, so take it as you will, but this is one of the reasons why I feel like Dickâs guilt about this incident was less about him killing the Joker and more about the way he did it. See, this was not taking Joker out solely for the greater good--if it was, Nightwing certainly wouldnât have killed him in the way he did. He went after the Joker in a rage to get revenge, and that scared him. Add that to the fact that he felt heâd let Batman down by killing and âlet the Joker winâ and presto. Full blown guilt complex. But thatâs definitely debatable. Anyway, about his motivations.Â
Explicitly, he killed the Joker because he thought that Joker had killed Tim. Iâd say that Timâs death was the final straw for Dick. He was tired of seeing the Joker hurt those he loved. When Barbara is shot by the Joker, Dick refers to waiting by her hospital bed as âthe darkest days of my life since my parents death.â And when Jason dies Dick explicitly says he wants the Joker dead:Â
Nightwing (1996) #62
So, itâs not like Dickâs desire for Jokerâs death is coming out of nowhere. Heâd held himself back, but Tim dies and heâs had enough. I think that Dick killed the Joker for all the family members that had been hurt, but Jason does have a special significance. In particular, thereâs this moment after Dick beats the Joker to the point where he is incapacitated where Dick pauses. For a second, he isnât sure if he is going to follow through with it. And then the Joker mentions Jason and Dick finishes it.Â
From that point on, there is no hesitation about what he is doing. Tim has to physically pull Dick away from the Jokerâs corpse to get him to stop. We have a lovely few moments where the Joker is dead:
Before Batman comes in and revives Joker (and gives him mouth to mouth...yuck). Nightwing walks away in guilt, and Batman lets him go saying that âhe has to face what heâs done.â Nightwing holes himself up in his apartment, staring at pictures of Barbara before her accident, and of Jason.Â
And that is the whole sad story.Â
#joker#dick grayson#dick and mind manipulation and mind-control : a toxic love affair#tim's a riot and kind-hearted but he's always been a manipulative little bastard
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What if... Lucky Contestant and/or Real Frankie angst? đ
<Incorrect-Finding-Frankie
You asked for this. Bad Ending unlocked. Also on Ao3
They were on the 65th season when things finally came to an end. The chat was slowly starting to lose interest in their winner. They needed someone new and Lucky had seen the writing on the wall before the new season had even started. So in hindsight it was no surprise that he had come out of the gate swinging. Literally.Â
Of course Frankie had been the first to face him. He'd been getting used to playing with them first before trying to catch them so he'd let his guard down. It was only when Lucky drove the knife he'd concealed into his eye did he finally realise what was happening. Of course the fight had still been a brutal affair. Lucky being tossed around like a rag doll as the rabbit screeched in pain, lashing out blindly in search of his target. Both were bloodied by the end but living up to his name, Lucky had managed to strike the final blow by tripping the beast and sending them careening into a saw blade trap. Bloodied and beaten he continued on, clutching his broken ribs as he breath came out in short ragged bursts.
He'd ignored the Frankie on the tvs for the most part. It's not like they could do anything but to throw curses and insults his way. But even that Frankie fell silent after Lucky had made his way to the server room. Leaving only one âFrankieâ left to deal with.
And so here they were, finally at the end and it was everything the rabbit had wanted and more. Frankie lay pinned under a piece of parkour equipment Lucky had managed to dislodge during their confrontation. His legs pinned down meaning he had been easy pray for when Lucky had plunged the metal pipe into his chest. Pity he didn't have the strength to hit a little deeper, seeing at the rabbit was now slowly âbleedingâ out rather than the quick end his contestant had hoped for.
âYou're beautiful you know that.â
âShut up. I've heard enough from youâŚâ Lucky was leaning against the broken screen, the chat still visible behind the cracks. He was caked in blood, sweat and oil, his breath laboured as he tried to keep himself standing. It was impressive he was still upright given the damage Frankie had done to him, the rabbit was pretty sure he'd broken their arm in the scuffle, along with their collar bone. He must be in annoy and yet he still refused to back down. Frankie could only grin wider. He was perfect!
âIt's true tho. After all you've been through, all we've been through, here you finally are. My âLuckyâ contestant, my money maker, my lover, my everything.â Frankie could stop the purr that escaped him as Lucky glowered at him, disgust clear on his face for the first time in a long time, haven finally discarded the mask Frankie had become accustomed to.
âLook at me more like that, my little rabbit. You know what you do to me when I get to see you angry~â Lucky went to spit out an insult, only to hiss in pain as he clutched his side the exertion of such an act too much for him right now.
âGo to hell you bastardâŚâ
Frankie just chuckled as he watched Lucky force himself to pick up a jagged piece of scrap and begin to stumble his way over to the rabbit. He wasn't going to let the rabbit just bleed out, that was too kind of a death, no where near befitting of their relationship. He wanted it to be close and personal. A suddenly shiver went down Frankie's spine as he realised this was it. This was his end. He was going to die. When he first realised that the higher ups were going to terminate him he'd felt real fear for the first time. Terrified of the ceaseless void of nothingness that was going to take him. But now, here, facing his end, he couldn't feel anything other than absolutely ecstasy! This was beyond anything he had ever felt before and he was intoxicated.
Grinning wider he held his hand out to the man as he shuffled towards him, as he had when they had first made that deal all those years ago. A wonderful memory he had come to cherish. Sighing the man reluctantly took it as he shifted his weight to it as he continued on, it's not like Frankie could do anything now. He'd lost. Lucky had won. As he always did.
Finally reaching him the man took a moment to catch his breath, the rabbit studying him, memorising each and every detail of him in this moment.
âI wasn't lying when I said you were beautiful. Right now you are stunning, Lucky.â
âI know and that's why I wish you'd stop talking for once.â Frankie just snorted as he gently rubbed the back of their hand, soothing them for what they had to do next.
âI wonder if a small part of you will miss me? I'll miss you.â
âI⌠Maybe a sick part of me will miss you. But it'll fade. I'm not letting you control my life anymore. I'm getting out of here and taking what is rightfully mine.â Lucky held the rabbit's gaze as through his confession, even at this stage refusing to hide his true feelings. Truly a stunning man~
Frankie just smiled and nodded before directing the man's attention towards a spot on his head.
âMy main CPU is stored here. A hard enough strike there will shut me down permanently. So try and not mess it up, it would be embarrassing to miss with such an audience watching us.â Lucky could only roll his eyes before offering a small smirk, unable to resist Frankie's charm one last time. Helping him up onto his chest, he watched as Lucky steadied himself before he raised the metal above his head ready to deal the finishing blow. To end this all. For both of them.
âDo you remember my promise? The one I made to you on our first date?â Lucky hesitated, the scrap still raised.
âYes, as if I'd forget that. But it doesn't matter now Frankie. You've lost.â
âI know but I still intended to keep my promise my sweet little rabbit.â
Lucky didn't have a chance to react as Frankie wrapped his arms around them and contracted the springs in his arms.Â
The sound of the pipe impaling them was a mix of the sickening cracking of bone and squelching of meat. His poor little contestant didn't stand a chance. He heard them cry out, gasping in pain as they tried desperately to expand their chest, but the blood quickly filling their chest charity and lungs made it impossible. (Not to mention the pipe.)
âShhhh it's okay Lucky. I'm here. Frankieâs got you.â His tone was so soft, like a mother with their child as he cradled their shaking form closer. Coming up to pet their hair he could hear them gargling, before they hacked, blood spluttering out, covering them both. Now this was the ending they deserved. It was perfect. The triumph of the hero over the villain, only for the twist and betrayal at the end. This story was already written the moment Lucky had agreed to stay. There was no happy endings here for them.
Holding him Frankie could only let out a purr, this was practically orgasmic. The feeling of Lucky dying in his arms, by his hand, was even more perfect than he could imagine. He'd have to make sure the techs didn't erase his memory when they repaired him. He needed to remember this moment for all eternity, just so he could have it on a constant repeat in his head. This is how he wanted to remember his Lucky. Hearing them gag he snapped back, offering a small apology he nuzzled this head before leaning down to place a soft âkissâ against their forehead.Â
âB-bastard⌠t-this was always the plan wasn't⌠it.â Even with his injuries he still had the ability to talk. How impressive~
âIt was. You were never going to leave this place alive Lucky. And I think you knew this.â Lucky could only give a weak nod, tears slowly starting to drip down his cheeks, leaving streaks in the blood caking them.
âI⌠did. IâŚjust had t-try still⌠Frankie i-it hurtsâŚâ Hushing him, the rabbit cuddled him close, burying his face against his hair.
âI know, just close your eyes Lucky. Just give in. It'll be over soon. I promise I won't leave you here like the others, I'll put you somewhere special. So we can be together forever~â
Lucky could only let out a weak sob, but just as Frankie had said soon he closed his eyes. His breaths becoming shallower and shallower until nothing. His body lay limply against the rabbit as they soon succumbed to their own injuries. The only sound left was the hum of the facility and the sound of multiple footsteps approaching them.
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why not team buck? :(
like eddie deserves to go through his sad girl era after being so joyous but buck revels in almost dying
becauseeeee in daily life when the world is pressing in on him from all sides eddie, like bobby, truly believes that living is a curse. but when heâs dying all the noise cuts out. he is forced to stare down all the things he stands to lose and is left with his base-level instincts which tell him he needs to fight and that he was built to survive the anguish. as much as he is making small joyful choices he also needs to âchooseâ to stick around because he is not something his loved ones need to be protected from. and also i havenât watched him struggle since season 4, plus we only got a whisper of what happens to buck when he thinks something is mortally wrong with eddie in 7x06 when he thought eddie was dead in the bathtub. if buck has the nde i am deprived of the opportunity to see buck do what he does best: scream and flail around in a way that is reserved exclusively for when eddie gets fucked up.
also buck almost dying pretty much never leads him to introspect but only inspires him to become a new version of himself defined by whatever it was that happened to him. youâre right he likes dying too much. they literally have done nothing with the time he already did die for whatever reason so iâm bored already. however the conditions now (he is bisexual, already sad/lonely/questioning what the hell heâs doing, eddie is unrepressing and probably not as inclined to hide behind chris) are such that having to deal with eddie almost dying again could throw some things into sharp clarity.
the reason i am very amenable to having it be both of them is that, even though everyone is always talking about how eddie never got to see buckâs reaction to the well or the shooting or whatever, i donât think that is actually very important. what would be great is buck should see how his living/dying impacts EDDIE while simultaneously being forced to confront the possibility that he doesnât have time to be stupid anymore because eddie is about to be gone and he needs to embrace reality, and fast, before he loses the chance to have what he actually wants for even just a minute <3
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How it feels the group chat discussing how Bill Cipher's mental illness and trauma affects his motivation and characterization, but also how he's a huge loser who deserves everything he got for refusing to address his symptoms:
#speaking as someone with a whole laundry list of mental health issues#I genuinely like how karmic Therapism is for him as a punishment#i like that hes forced to confront himself and what hes done#i like that he *has* to heal to move on#theres something... cathartic about that#gravity falls#bill cipher#(that triangle is my precious boy who did everything wrong)#(hes one of my favorite characters in anything but he is also an absolute bastard đ)
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Actually, I really liked the WOTFI overall, itâs only the ending that rubbed me the wrong way.
We got Puzzles and Leggy bonding in the Meme Factory mini-arc and Iâm satisfied with the amount of it that was in WOTFI. Thereâs still time for Meggyâs feelings on the situation to be explored as a sort of epilogue, wouldnât be the first time.
I liked the battle being musical it suits Puzzles well. And itâs not like it wasnât tense during the musical number. The bit where Four and Mario saved Meggy when Puzzles tried to slam her into the ground was awesome. I love that Four sucks at fighting until someone he cares about is in danger and the adrenaline kicks in.
I think itâs fun that if everything had gone according to plan and they hadnât turned Meggy back⌠Puzzles wouldâve just⌠kept them playing minigames forever. Youâll play fun games with him and LIKE IT!
Ties into the fact that heâs always calling the crew his âfriendsâ. Yâknow
Brainwashing people to force them to spend time with him. He tried asking nicely and it didnât work. This is the closest to friendship heâs gonna get and heâs just resigned himself to that.
And Meggy is genuinely convinced this is whatâs best for him. Alas, the traumatized beanie girl has too much trust in the justice system đ.
Wish weâd gotten to see her be his lawyer and have him plead insanity thinking this would help.
Sheâs trying to help even if sheâs still really mad at Puzzles! I love that for her! I love her going âI know thereâs a scared little child inside youâ and trying to help him and get through to him but still being mad about what heâs done and having trouble letting that go even when confronting the most vulnerable part of Puzzles! She finds that scared little child with the intent of talking him down and ends up just yelling at him, but she also literally gave him a part of herself with Leggy!
I think thatâs part of whatâs made me more okay with the ending. Iâve come around to it a liiittle bit. I still donât like it because implications of insane asylum and Puzzles was already treading a line there of being a sort of âIâm a twisted cycle path and Iâm going to Jeff the Kill you while the song Pretty Little Psycho playsâ thing. Yâknow the trope: mostly benign due to sheer unseriousness but still sorta villainizing poor mental health.
But⌠Yâknow the more I think about it the less it feels like Meggy was intentionally tricking Puzzles or using his vulnerable, lonely inner child against him. And that makes me a little more okay with it all. I still donât like it. I donât blame Puzzles for feeling like heâs been âdouble-crossedâ, but I donât blame Meggy either (not that I did before. Before I saw it as cruel but understandable in universe given the circumstances, now I see it as Meggy is so well-meaning she wants to help everyone so bad but Meggy. Honey. NoâŚ)
Meggyâs earnestly trying to help! I just wish Mario had let Puzzles talk for long enough that he and Four could get some idea whatâs going on with Puzzles. (LET FOUR SEE HIMSELF IN PUZZLES ALREADY. THE NARRATIVE FOIL OF ALL TIME! GUYS WHO CARE TOO MUCH ABOUT PLEASING AN AUDIENCE AND ARE BAD AT EMPATHY! BELOVED!) Because right now the only one with any idea what heâs going through is so incredibly ill-equipped to help him and frankly shouldnât have to! also this
Sheâs so well meaning but bad at it! I think about this line more than I should! Went to helping people school they told her to whack people with golf clubs and she sees no problems with this.
So bad at helping! Mario would literally rather die! I love her!
uuuhhh whereâs that post
Also OOOH! Iâll have to keep an eye out for your fanfic.
soooâŚ
WOTFI
THEY DIDNT ADDRESS ANY OF THE PARALLELS AND THEN THEY
INSTITUTIONALIZED HIM
Iâm so mad about this. Iâm so mad. Iâm so mad.
because okay. Okay remember this.
His super dramatic flinch here and there was that post going around like âI wonder what happened in Mr Puzzlesâ childhood to make him flinch like thatâ
CHILD PUZZLES DOES THE SAME THING
EVERY TIME MEGGY/LEGGY APPROACHES HIM HE FLINCHES. HE COWERS. EVEN OUTSIDE OF THE POTENTIAL CONCLUSION HE WAS BEATEN, SOMEONE GENUINELY CARING ABOUT HIM IS SUCH A FOREIGN CONCEPT THAT HE ASSUMES THE ONLY REASON ANYONE WOULD GET CLOSE IS TO HARM HIM.
AND HEâS NOT EVEN WRONG?! THATâS EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENS?
THEY INSTITUTIONALIZED HIM HE IS TIED TO A TABLE IN A PADDED ROOM. THEY APPEALED TO HIS HUMANITY AND FOUND THE GOOD IN HIM AND THEY USED IT AGAINST HIM.
YOU THINK THATLL HELP HIM? TARGETING THE MOST VULNERABLE PART OF HIMSELF AND GETTING HIM SENT TO AN ASYLUM?
AND IT SUCKS BECAUSE I WAS LEGITIMATELY ENJOYING THE EPISODE BEFORE THAT! I was having fun until that ending. Thatâs literally the one thing I didnât like. The scene with Kid Puzzles was really well done. Everybodyâs outfits were so cool. IGBP flesh blobs were there that was really cool
but then
I hate this. Genuinely worse than killing him off to me. It just feels wrong
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from @/elfbotanist on twitter who is posting from trick's bluesky; they elaborated a bit on exactly what the intention of the solavellan ending is
#honestly#this is a lot more sad than i originally interpreted it#i was like oh they can leave if he confronts his regrets like rook did#but it doesnt seem like that is the case?#maybe it is a possibility but he has to stay there to study the blight that is also trapped there?#honestly i love this ending the more i sit with it#but the more i sit with it also the more it hurts#i was expecting him to die and i was really prepared for that#but this is tragic in a way i wasnt expecting and its got me so fucked up#its beautifully poetic#the trickster god who freed slaves and trapped tyrants allowing himself to be trapped#to make up for everything he has done#for him to return to the fade after being forced into the physical world#for him to follow mythal into the physical only for his mortal lover to follow him back into the fade so he wouldn't have to be alone#lavellan giving up her life for this makes me sob#i love her i love this its so fucking bittersweet i could die#and with what tay said about a dalish keeper's role being to guard everyone from the dreadwolf#thats exactly what shes doing but because she loves him she is helping hold him accountable#i genuinely cannot stop sobbing this is so insane#i cant believe they managed to absolutely bamboozle me like this because i did not expect something so tragic#well played trick weekes.....#solavellan#solas#veilguard spoilers#dragon age the veilguard spoilers#da:v spoilers#dav spoilers
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You can't just have Elton John sing lyrics like "oath of silence for the voice of a generation" and "you are what you love not who loves you" and expect me not to get emotional.
#fall out boy#patrick stump#elton john#pete wentz#joe trohman#andy hurley#they knew what they were doing#i like elton johns music a lot but his importance to queer culture and culture at large can not be overstated#he is the voice of generation#a generation that was brutally taken from us#sure they were killed by a disease but don't tell me that political inaction born of homophobia didn't also kill those people#do I think hating one political figure shows a good understanding of politics? no the system was and is more complex than that and always#has been but Regan does make a good case for himself#after years of inaction with lots of people dying of aids when he finally was forced to confront this#you know whom he appointed?#a catholic navy admiral#that man knew nothing of disease and how they spread#but history bit regan in his ass because Watkins actually did a great job and really got stuff done and advocated for queer people
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okay but like the number of things Mobius says that someone or other in fandom gets really mad about even though he frequently says things just to get a reaction and that's not subtle and he even admits it at least once that i can think of offhand.
Or B, I just want to catch this guy and I'll tell you whatever I need to tell you.
IDK why any of us assume that Mobius is always telling the truth? Fandom picked up on his therapist technique of asking a question not for the information itself but to make the person he's asking face their own answer, so we all know his thing is using words against people if it benefits him. (Ohhh, that's a bit like that other guy, isn't it? Thingy. Whathisname. You know the one I mean, right? Aye, that one! What was his name??) Come to think of it this probably explains all the Praise Kink lokius fic as well - we noticed him using words to trigger a reaction and we noticed that it works.
The "seismic narcissist" line isn't his honest assessment and he doesn't actually think there's a Superior Loki. He also said Sylvie had been pruned just to see how Loki would react, but we all got that one, possibly because it can't be used to prove that the show hates its own protagonist and invented Mobius to voice that hatred in the text.
#is this Discourse? it might be? oh no!#mobius discourse just goes round and round endlessly and can be very one-sided (...sorry)#mobius is shady AF and his flavour of shadiness is very ends justify the means and this is part of that#the morality that lets him lie so easily as part of his job is the morality that lets him sleep at night after pruning variants all day#what i like about that is that this IS how cops and fascism work - they can always justify what they do and tell themselves it's Good#so there's a neat irony in Mobius forcing Loki to confront his own justifications for his deeds while not doing that himself#he can push someone else until they spot the flaws in their excuses but he's never done it to himself#and why would he? he's Good isn't he? the Time Keepers made him for a purpose and that purpose is as benevolent as they are! (oh no!)#mobius#loki series
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The Verdict Due
SIMON 'GHOST' RILEY x FEM!READER TASK FORCE 141 x FEM!READER
Traitors Among Us (Part 1)
Innocents Among You (Part 2)
The Guilty Plea (Part 3)
Clear Skies (Part 5)
Summary: You head to Laswell to talk on the rest of your now ruined military career. Of course, you're forced to confront your team as it happens, the last people on earth you'd like to see.
If you liked this would you Buy me a Coffee?
Simon's steps are slow, lacking energy or purpose. Releasing the buckles strapping his vest down to him, he finally arrives to his door, lifting the camo from himself.
His forehead pressing into the wooden door, he finds it harder and harder to open everyday, seeing reminders of you every moment of everyday, when he closes his eyes, when he lays down in bed. Hell when he opens the door. He hated this room now.
Outside of the place that you both had made your home away from war, from battle, from the base, this was where the two of you had once spent most of your time.
He raised his head off the door, before bringing it back down on it, then doing it again, this time hard enough to hurt. "Fuck," he cursed, cursing himself, his stupid decisions, the times he'd never get back, the mistakes he'll never be able to erase. Huffing out bitterly, squeezing his eyes shut, he's still for a moment, before banging his fist against the wall. "Fuck!" There's a crackle along the wall, a clatter of dust and dried paint hitting his feet.
A shuddered breath leaves him, swallowing down his grief, his anger at himself. But, he can't help it. He's ruined everything.
Simon's head stays there against the doorway, he doesn't want to go in.
His head turns a bit, seeing a figure down the hallway, straightening up, dark eyes squinting. "Johnny?"
Quiet and Still. The Scotsman's mouth is set in a hard line, he runs a hand down his face, smearing the mess he'd made of himself. "I..." he breathes deeply. "I saw her today."
"You what?" Simon perks up, eyes wide. He looks past his comrade, seeing the open doorway of your room, "She's here," he speaks, voice alight and hopeful. Making his way past Johnny, "She's here?" he asks this time, bracing himself at her doorway.
But, the room is a mess and void of you. He'd nearly forgotten how the soldiers had left it, the day it happened he could watch it, it would've been too finalizing of what he thought was your betrayal. Today was meant to be the day they'd clean it all up, due to plaguing themselves with missions and ops that required long weeks, long hours. No one wanted to think about what they'd done.
But, now they'd only made another mistake in waiting too long. And now you had to be greeted by this mess.
"I didn't know it was--" Johnny couldn't turn back to the room, back to Simon, as he spoke. "I didn't know we did so much to her. I thought--how long--how could I--" he shakily began. "--how could you?" Simon's eyes flicker to his friend, dark circles and sunken cheeks seem to worsen. "She was so...she couldn't even look at me, Si. Like I'd make her sick, like I'd--hurt her again...I've never--" his fingers claw at his chest, hoping to rip away the ache in his heart, eyes haunted to tears and staring into the dark of his memory as he thought back. "I'd never--" he can't finish.
"She was here?" Simon asked again.
Johnny's clouded eyes look to Simon, opening his mouth before opting for nodding. Clearing his throat, finally seeming to get a handle on himself, "Just left."
"She what?" Simon bolts out towards the stairs, pushing through the doorway and jumping down the first flight to rush through the rest.
As he gets to the lobby floor, he shoves through the door, revealing the hallway to him, running down the long stretch before ramming into the side wall to catch himself at the corner. He continues down the way, running as fast as he's able, before bursting through the side doors of the front lobby.
He sees you immediately, beyond the glass doorways.
"(Y/n)..."
He's running before he can think to get his legs moving.
---
Leaving the dormitories, finally leaving behind the spare hospital wear that you had swapped for your own clothes, you waved down the first vehicle you'd seen.
The driver letting you into the truck, the two of you unaware as he begins to drive off, Simon shoving his way through the residential doors and coming to a stop in the middle of the street as you drive away.
You, having hopped a ride with one of the soldiers making his rounds, the Jeep shakes with the changing terrain, providing more conversation than the trooper that was much too quiet. Shifting his shoulders, adjusting his fingers around the leather, glancing one too many times through the mirror.
It was getting weird. But, you were a familiar face on the base, unfortunately now, it used to be because you were good at your job, the best sniper they had on the force. But now, it was because you were the first proclaimed traitor of the force in decades and the first to be wrong about.
So, the new attention is nothing to be pleased about.
"Find something interesting to look at, soldier?"
Back straightening, body stiffening and eyes facing the road, the trooper swallows thickly at having been caught eyeing you. "No, ma'am!"
"Then I suggest you keep your eyes on the road."
"Yes, ma'am!" clearing his throat. "Sorry, ma'am, I don't mean to stare."
Arms crossed, head turned to watch the smaller buildings go by, your jaw clenched. "It's fine..." you breathe, before relaxing a bit more as the drive goes farther and farther away from the residential areas. Eyes flickering over to the still tense trooper, you mutter. "Ease."
His shoulders drop, head turning, flustered. "Sorry, ma'am."
It was always strange to be called 'Ma'am' by fellow soldiers, usually you were only a year or so apart, others you had been younger by ten years or older by five. But, this trooper was new to the force, young, clearly still jumpy, you had been the same after your first missions on the Task Force.
"I'm sorry, ma'am," the trooper then speaks, shakily.
"You don't have to keep--"
"About what happened to you," he continued. "I'm not sure if you heard that yet, but it's--that sounds--I can't imagine. I'm sorry that happened to you."
For a moment too long you're quiet, holding your breath, staring at the scenery as it whistled on past, the wind whipping through your hair. Your nails tearing into your skin as you rake them over your scars, smearing the line of blood left after ripping out your IV line, abandoning it as you found a ride.
"Get any cool scars out of it, at least?" he jokes, lightheartedly.
Your eyes snap his way, his eyes widening before he looks back to the road, back to stiff.
You open your mouth to speak, but you can't. You're just angry, too angry to find the words. But, you don't want to take it out on him, he was just attempting to alleviate whatever burden he imagined to be on your shoulders. But, all it was was a reminder, this was all anyone could think of anymore, when it came to you, this ordeal.
The apologies, the reminders, the quiet looks, the whispers, the fucking gnawing pain still splintered through your spine, you were tired of it.
The car pulls up to the largest administrative building on the base camp, hopefully you were right and this was where Laswell was posted up.
Quickly pulling the car handle as the trooper steps out of the vehicle to assist you, you hurriedly speak as he reaches to touch you. "I've got it," you hiss out, harsher then you meant. Stepping down and off the platform, onto the sidewalk, you forget you don't have your IV pole to at least stabilize you. So, when you stumble, he grabs your arm, his other resting on your shoulder.
"Woah!" his grip lacks gentleness, though not bruising, it's enough to set you off.
Your arm goes back and over his arm, shrugging him off, roughly. "I said I got it!" Your palm pushing into his shoulder and sending him back and off of you, he shifts back and nearly off his feet, catching himself.
"Alright, jeez!"
You're stumbling back into the light pole luckily a few steps behind you, leaning yourself against the cemented metal, you balance yourself. Shaking off the buzz in your ears and rubbing away the tension built along your skin, taking a few shuttered breaths, turned away from the soldier.
The trooper takes a few steps away from you, expression lifted to frustration and annoyance, rolling his eyes, brows furrowed and back pedaling to the Jeep. "Fucking crazy," he mutters to himself, adjusting his gear and stepping up back to the vehicle.
But, he doesn't make it very far until you're on him.
"What the fu--!"
Taking the opening of his kevlar and yanking him out of the vehicle, unable to catch himself fast enough to get to his feet. You hold a steel grip on the collar of his uniform, literally holding him up by his straps, pulling his entire bodyweight off the ground, leaning down so you're face to face with him. "Say it again," you snapped, eyes dark and boring into his skull. "I wanna have a good excuse for what I'm about to do to you."
He was taller, probably stronger, but looking up at you, he could see the years of mayhem and chaos that's burned itself into your irises, made you the lieutenant he'd tripped up on properly respecting. "I didn't--I didn't say anything! I'm sorry, ma'am, it won't--it won't happen again!"
Nostrils flared, eyes flickering between his wide, fearful ones, your hands loosen around his gear. He falls forwards, landing on his forearms with a groan, releasing a relieved breath.
He looks up, watching as you turn and make your trek into the building. You had seemed so fragile before, with a limp in your walk, scars head to toe and those braces along your legs, he assumed you had no fight in you. He couldn't have imagined, five minutes, he'd be wrong.
---
"Laswell."
The Station Chief turns, manila folder files in hand, brows raised at the intrusion before her eyes widen at the sight of your tired figure.
"Gray..."
You don't wait to be invited inside, instead pulling up a chair as you let the door close behind you. Not fully out of a lack of respect but your legs were killing you and surely if you wait a second longer you'll literally tear a muscle. "You free?"
"Never. But, I can make time," she answers. "Is something wrong?"
You bite down on your tongue. What isn't wrong.
"I put in a request for council in resignation, ma'am. I'm just here to know if it went through."
"I did...receive your request," The woman is still quite surprised to see you, a bit off put at your presence, hearing about your scars was one thing, seeing them was another. "Of course. Though, I expected you to wait for my call before deciding to come to me."
"I'm sure," you feigned a slight chuckle that faded as soon as it started. You say nothing else but stare.
Laswell sighs, tossing down the folder she'd been holding. "Look, Lieutenant Gray--"
"Just (L/N)," you gritted out. "Please." You couldn't stand your codename at the moment, you didn't want to carry a single thing this team had given you.
"Lieutenant..." Laswell pulled up a chair on the opposite side of the long table, facing you, "You've accomplished much on the force, saved lives, eliminated threats that had the potential to level the united nations, your honors and distinctions. At the very least, here, your guidance is a treasure..."
"I'd like my resignation to be approved, Chief--"
Laswell continues. "I need you to careful think about what you're doing here, Gray--(L/n). I don't want you to be motivated by what's happened to you, you still have a place on the force, it doesn't have to be beside your team. Don't waste your talents in the field because of this experience."
"Experience," You scoffed at the word, nose cringing up in disgust at the downplay. "I didn't go on a rollercoaster at Disney World, god--I was tortured by my team for weeks while my fiancĂŠ threatened to kill me afterwards..." you were about to lose your mind. "What makes any of you think I'd want to stay here? Why can't any of you just respect my decision to leave? I'm resigning."
Laswell settles back into her chair, lips pressing together, she makes a hum of a sound. "I can arrange a transfer," she compromised. "But, my authorization goes through only after informing Price, he also needs to sign off on this."
Your jaw clenches, your fingers tightening around your clasped hands. "Then how about that favor you owe me?"
Station Chief straightens, brow lifting and arms crossed. "Excuse me, soldier?"
Sighing, reaching a hand into your bag, you bring out a folder of your own, some documents signed off. "I had to wonder who the evidence was sent to, given it was right after our mission and Price doesn't even look at his reports to sign off on something in under 24 hours, it wasn't him," watching as Laswell opened the folder, revealing her own name signing off on the interrogation, just a few of the photos that'd declared you guilty. "Thanks for ruining my career, Laswell."
She spreads out the evidence, her own signature on the papers, she breathes out. "And what are you trying to do here, Gray?"
"Stop calling me that."
"Trying to threaten me with what exactly--?"
"Nothing," you answered. "I'm asking for a favor, from someone I thought was my friend," you find it harder to say, Laswell's jaw clicks and she shifts in her chair. "You owe me that much."
"It's the job, (L/n). I was protecting our own, our resources were very promising."
"Until they weren't, huh?" you sarcastically gritted out.
"Yes..." Laswell sighs. "I do apologize, (L/n), but--"
"Just do this for me," you interrupted, pleading this time. "Please. I can't go to him, I can't even look at Simon, let alone Price. Forget about being in the same room with them. I just--I can't be here, this isn't where I belong anymore," looking down at your hands, the scars that circled your wrists. This was a final decision. "I'm resigning with or without you."
Rising from your seat, Laswell stands as you do, "You resign without clearance, they'll take everything from you. Your pension, your insurance, retirement, everything, you'll be dishonorably discharged, you understand that?"
"'Course, I do," you admit. "Honestly, I thought I'd be dead on a mission somewhere before I saw any of that, I don't expect anything out of this. Nothing's...worth any of this."
As you turn the handle to leave, Laswell speaks once more. "I just wanted to enlighten you on what I'm risking for you, signing off on this."
At that, you glance back to her, watching as the older woman sighs heavily, picking up a pen, opening up the manila folder she'd been holding onto previously. Opening it up to reveal your resignation papers.
"If I do this, when I call on you, Gray," Laswell says. "I expect you to be there."
As she wrote her signature down on the dotted line, you swallowed down the ache that's plagued you for weeks, "I swear."
As the station chief continues down the packet, turning to the next page and signing once again, you slowly slide back into your chair, sitting silently as you watch her sign off on your leave from military service.
You bring your hand up fast as a tear runs down your face, wiping it away before Laswell can see, sniffing quietly.
---
Walking slowly down the side hallway of the admin building, you stare out into space, your eyes glistening as you hold the signed resignation packet to your chest, pressing it to yourself tightly.
Passing the front desk, the security posted up at the elevators, you enter the main hall and come to a stop. Your grip on your documents tightening as you watch rain pour out onto the outer glass of the windows.
Watching the downpour outside, you can't seem to get your feet moving to just leave this place. That's all you need to do, just...walk right through it, into a car, past the gates, onto the highway. Just...go home.
As you flinch at the pitter patter of the rain hitting the building, a short burst of thunder, you try to inch your way closer to the doors but the closer you get, the more you can remember. The more you can feel.
The rain gets louder, and louder. It's cold, although you recall it being 90 degrees and in the middle of the desert. It must just be you.
Putting your folder away and into your bag, the automatic doors open for you, but it's too hard to step through. Staring out into the open landscape, the dividing border of the desert land and the gates surrounding the base. The dry ground now turning muddy, trucks driving by and the mud swelling up at the change in pressure, soldiers rushing through the rain, kicking up mud, flicking up umbrellas.
Breathing deeply, you scuff your shoes forwards, feeling the first drop hit your skin, it's warm, but it's no comfort. Gasping at the feeling, you stumble back into the building, the automatic doors closing.
Short gasps of breath quietly leave you, your nails burrow into the skin of your forearm, you stare at the rain as it pelts at the ground, flooding pot holes and falling into storm drains.
The automatic door opens again, you back up, shifting to the side, as an officer gives you a strange look as he walks past and into the rain.
Your hesitance to proceed into the rain was noticed by a few in the main lobby. Like Kyle, who still stood in his mission uniform, dropping off his reports to the main desk, getting off the elevator to see you staring up at the cloudy sky.
His eyes widening in shock, he's lost in his own world when he begins to take steps towards you, lips parting in disbelief, voice cracking as he breathes out to say, to beg or plead for forgiveness.
The automatic door opens again as you shuffle forwards to try to step outside, he doesn't fully notice your fear of the weather when he speaks.
"(Y/n)..."
You turn at the sound of your name and his eyes flicker to the large scar along your cheek, the red of your eye still, that had changed the color of your iris, maybe permanently. The way you hold your bag tight in your hands as if to shield it from the rain before yourself.
You don't say anything, he hadn't expected you to. You stare at him, surprised to see him, then the expression changes to terror, brows pulling inward and hands sinking into your bag to bring it closer. His heart aching at your reaction to him, his lips pressing together, he doesn't know if she should say another thing. Just let you go.
"(Y/n), I..." he can't help himself as he continues, breathlessly.
You back away from him, out of the building and into the rain. The moment it hits your back, soaking through your shirt, rain hitting the top of your head, down your back, you tense up and spin around.
Kyle's brows furrow, before worriedly witnessing as you curl into yourself instantly, crying out in terror, your hands coming up and over your head. "(Y/n)!"
Realizing what you'd done, your back hits the glass doorway, too late for the doorway to register you wanting to come back inside. You stumble to the corner of the building, just next to the doorway and under the too small gutter to find any shelter from the pelting water at your skin.
A loud sob leaves you, squeezing your eyes shut, you can feel the torture starting again, the unbearable freeze of your limbs, the force of crashing pounds of water along your spine. The screams they would pull from you...
Your torment lasts only a few seconds, suddenly the rain stops, but the sound continues around you. A coat settling around your shoulders and over your head, Kyle's hands on your shoulders, he's yelling over the thunder. "Come on, let's get you out of this. Come on, (Y/n)," he takes your arms. "Let me help you, please!"
"You did this," you cried. "I told you. I told you it wasn't me. But, you kept turning it back on! And then you'd leave it like that and it drove me fucking insane. I'll never be ok again, I can't--" hyperventilating. "Don't touch me, Kyle."
Kyle swallows thickly, head hanging low, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment before leaning down to you. "I can't leave you here like this, please, love," he hauls you up to your feet. You shove him back, pressing yourself further into the corner, shaking, "(Y/n)--"
"Don't put your fucking hands on me. What don't you get, huh?" you spat. Pulling off the jacket he'd placed over you, tensing at ever drop of rain that fell over you after, but you toss it back at him. "I don't want anything from you. Never again."
"I'm sorry," Kyle clutches the jacket. "I'm so bloody sorry. I'm sorry for every damn thing I'd ever done to you. I'm sorry we didn't listen. I should've never done that to you. I didn't want to, I just--I thought I was doing the right thing for all of us," his voice breaks and he cries under the rain as his little sister, his family, hatefully stares him down. "I thought you'd give in, that it'd be over as quick as it started! I'm sorry I couldn't trust that you were telling the truth all that time."
"I don't want your apology!" you yell. "Cause you'll never know the same feeling. You'll never understand what you've taken from me. What you've done to me--" hiccupping painfully.
Kyle looks away from you, inhaling with a shudder, reddening eyes are covered as he raises his hands to run over his face.
"Your apologies. Your wishes for forgiveness," you seethe. " You should keep them. They mean nothing to me."
With that, you shove on past him, re-entering the building and rushing down the hallway, you turn the corner away from Kyle. Leaving the distraught man out in the rain, the automatic door sliding closed as he looks on after you.
Part 5 OUT NOW!
#call of duty x reader#simon riley x reader#simon riley angst x reader#ghost angst#cod x reader#call of duty#ghost x reader#cod angst#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley angst
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title: gala gone wrong?
pairing: prohero!bakugo x prohero!reader
katsuki was suddenly forced to confront his feelings for you, when you were put in the date auction for charity.
the heroes gala was something katsuki wouldn't look forward to normally. but this year he had a plan. he was going to ask you to be his date.
...originally. he chickened out last minute and owed kirishima 1000 dollars.
he was surprised to see you come alone though, opting to sit next to him which made him fist pump internally. you were a very successful hero who also doubled as a model. for what reason you ask?
none really, you just did it cause days off of hero work were boring. walking runways, topping charts, and beating villains with style was just another day for you.
you looked especially gorgeous this evening though, working with another up and coming designer to design a dress that perfectly complimented everything from your skin color, to you hair, to even references of your quirk.
katsuki suddenly felt underdressed in his suit, but to be fair every hero who was a man was dressed in a suit. except for monoma.
the auction portion of the gala started before the awards were to be given out.
the awards were pretty pointless in katsuki's mind. the only ones that mattered to him were the final rankings of popularity, efficiency, and the overall category.
"you nervous?" you whispered, talking over the first few lower ranked hero's to be auctioned for a date.
"nah, i know i won at least in popularity." he said, trying to keep eye contact with you without stuttering.
"hmm. what if i won? huh?"
"shut up."
she put a hand over her mouth, when suddenly-
"and the last date to be auctioned, a night with the top ranked woman hero [name]!"
"huh? oh that's me!" you said, collecting your dress as you walked to the stage, leaving katsuki blinking in confusion to himself.
you were in this? i mean it shouldn't have been a surprise, you had a rabidly loyal fan base, even since U-A. but what was he supposed to do? bid?
"the bid starts at.. 15,000 dollars." you rolled your eyes and gestured for people to go higher, and they did.
"17,000!"
"20,000!"
"30,000"
numbers were being shouted from all around the room, with the highest bids barely even being able to be tracked. the bids ranged from new heroes who definetly could not afford you, to old men who you really wish couldn't afford you.
you covered your mouth as you let a laugh escape you, this was hilarious to you, you'd have to do this more often.
after a bunch of back and forth, one booming voice cut all the others off.
"500,000 dollars. cash." to your surprise it wasn't an old creep. grand, also known as shindo yo, had suddenly bid. just as they were about to call off the auction and announce shindo the winner,
katsuki's internal dialogue won and 'forced' him to bid too. "750,000 dollars." he declared.
he doesn't think he'd have done it had it been any other idiot who wanted a chance with you, but that loser had to go.
"sold! to dynamite! we've broken a record here folks, 750,000 for the charity of --"
the words faded into the background as he looked up at you, smiling and walking over to him. he felt is heart speed up, his hands drown in sweat, his hair puff out.
"if you wanted to take me out you could've just asked katsuki." you joked, taking him by the hand as you pulled him back to the table towards the back you two were settled in on.
"whatever, now we have an excuse to."
"don't tell me you like me or something katsuki? how embarrassing."
"i told you shut it."
she laughed and settled down, poking him on the cheek. "its okay if you do, i like you quite a lot dynamite."
he flushed red at that, tiny explosions being let out from his hands inadvertently because of how caught off guard he was.
she held his hand under the table, before looking straight ahead to the ceremonies going on in front of them. he smiled and leaned back.
the awards were pretty boring when compared to the view of you, so until they had gotten to the cool stuff he just eyed you.. daydreaming about the life you'll have together someday.
he focused again when the top three heroes in popularity, efficiency, and overall were to be announced by all might.
at the end of the night, not only did he leave with a number one trophy with 'popular vote!' embedded in its side and an all-might signature at the bottom,
he also left with a lipstick mark from you right on his cheek, some flowers, and a small note that read 'see you tomorrow :)'.
#sorry i watched white chicks again and now its everyone's problem#lilac speaksę§#bakugo drabble#bakugo oneshot#bakugo#bakugo x reader#bakugo x y/n#katsuki bakugo x reader#bakugo katuski#bakugo x you#bakugo fluff#katsuki x you#mha x you#katsuki x y/n#katsuki x reader#bnha bakugo katsuki
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Cherry Red, Crimson Blood
Chapter 19: Daddy Issues
Summary: Your pack is back home, but things aren't quite as good as you try to make them seem. Some truths get revealed, while others remain in the dark.
Pairings: Poly 141 x reader
Word Count: 9,337 words
Warnings: Alpha/Beta/Omega dynamics, Alternate Universe, a/b/o typical classism and sexism, angst, PTSD, flashbacks, nightmares, '09 Ghost's backstory, mentioned abuse/child abuse, still pretty heavy emotionally, language, finally some of the comfort after the hurt, plenty of fluff
A/N: This stupid fic making me cry again. I may have lied about this one not being quite as heavy as the others...it's still pretty heavy, but there are some sweet moments in there too. There is a bit of a time jump in the middle, it's roughly a week long or so. Not much, but it does cut ahead a bit just for the sake of plot and moving things along. Also yeah, I got it done earlier than expected.
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Youâre warm. Sweat has begun to form in the creases of your body. Youâre wrapped around something solid, something contributing to the intense warmth. The smell of leather and eucalyptus fills your nose as you nuzzle your face against soft fabric. It sends a shiver down your spine despite the heat, your eyes fluttering open. Youâre staring at a blurry mass of black fabric, your brain beginning to catch up as you become more and more aware.Â
Leather. Eucalyptus. Something distinctly alpha.Â
Fuck.Â
Youâre spooning Ghost.Â
He has to be asleep, otherwise he would never let you get so close to him. He would have shoved you off, pushed you back towards Johnny, who youâve traded places with in the middle of the night. You must have gotten too hot sandwiched between the two betas and tried to escape somewhere cooler. That led to you spooning with Ghost, not that heâs much cooler than the betas.Â
You can get away before he wakes up, remove yourself from his personal space before he realizes and forces you away. Avoid the shame and embarrassment of his rejection, his anger at you for crossing that boundary, even just in your sleep. Despite the fact you know that boundary is there, despite the fact you did it unintentionally, youâre not sure you could handle such a rejection right now, even from him.Â
You slowly begin to withdraw your arm from around his middle, sliding it back towards your body. If you go slow enough, you should be able to untangle yourself from around him without waking him and avoid a confrontation.Â
A quiet gasp is pulled from your lips as his hand wraps around your wrist, keeping you from moving.Â
âDonât.â He says quietly.Â
Your heart is thudding in your chest as he tugs your arm back around him, keeping you where you are. Your exhale is shaky as you slowly relax, pressing your face against his back again. Youâre not sure what to do. You were expecting him to push you away, get up in disgust and leave because you got too close, you pushed past the barrier he had placed around himself when it came to you. A barrier that got let down only while youâre training, then itâs put right back up as soon as youâre finished. Now here you are, spooning him after sleeping in the same room, the same nest.Â
You wouldnât have taken him for being a little spoon type.Â
Your eyes begin to droop again as you lay there, breathing in Ghostâs scent. Itâs like a comforting blanket, lulling you into a sense of relaxation, of safety, something you havenât felt in days. For the first time your mind is quiet, not panicking about what happened, or what could happen. You donât have to worry about your pack now, because theyâre here with you again.Â
You drift off to sleep again for a while, sleeping soundly in the cocoon of safety your pack has provided for you.Â
You wake a while later, sticky with sweat. Your back is pressed against Ghostâs, and thereâs something draped across your face. You push it away, blinking your eyes open. Johnny has starfished across the nest on his back, his mouth open as he snores. Heâs stolen your bear, one arm holding it against his chest, and the other arm had been what was draped across your face. Kyle is curled up on his other side, having moved from the middle to the far side of the nest. John is missing, making your brows furrow.Â
You push yourself up to sit, the air in the room almost like a sauna. You rub your eyes, trying to blink away the sleepiness. That might have been the best sleep youâve gotten since your heat. It was likely the exhaustion taking its toll, paired with your brain finally being able to relax while surrounded by your pack.
You feel like you could lay down and sleep for another ten hours.Â
Youâre warm, though, sweat causing your clothes to stick to your skin. The blankets have all been kicked to the end of the mattresses, likely ditched early on in the night. You wiggle out of your sweatpants, kicking them off the end of the mattress as well, leaving you in a baggy shirt that you think is Johnnyâs.Â
You feel suddenly exposed sitting there, your eyes flicking around the room as a chill runs down your spine. John would have noticed if something was out of place, but he could have just brushed it off as you in his room. He had given you permission to be in his space while he was gone, if you needed to. One of them would have noticed if things were out of place in their rooms. Ghost would likely notice, since you havenât been in his room at all.Â
You lay back down on your back, staring up at the vent on the ceiling. The cover is in place, and no matter how hard you look, you canât see a camera hiding in the gaps. It doesnât ease your worry any as you stare up at it, wishing you had your phone so you could at least try to look for one. Though, perhaps it was better you didnât have your phone with you. You hadnât been brave enough to pop it open and look for anything strange hidden inside, though you wouldnât even know where to begin to look, or what to look for.Â
You should tell them. What if someone is watching you right now?Â
You flinch as John appears in the doorway suddenly, five water bottles tucked against his chest. Your skin is crawling from the thought of someone watching, someone listening in on such a private moment with you and your pack. You hadnât even thought about it last night, the stress and your fear had taken over your mind. You push yourself back up to sit as John passes Ghost a water bottle, handing one to you as well. You unscrew the cap as John places the other bottles on his desk. Johnny and Kyle still asleep, unaware of the world.Â
Unaware of the danger.Â
A cold shiver slips down your spine as you gulp down the water. What if someone had entered the barracks last night? You werenât in your room, and the door wasnât locked. Anyone could have just walked in and put up cameras again easily.Â
One of the guys would have heard someone snooping around, right? You were so out of it you likely would have slept through one of them getting up. What if they were also so exhausted from their deployment they could have slept through someone breaching their space as well. Did Ghost lock the door last night? You canât remember.Â
âAlright, sweetheart?âÂ
Your head snaps up to where John is leaning against his desk. His brows are slightly furrowed as he stares at you, and you realize youâve been projecting your scent. With them gone, you didn't have to worry as much. You could stink up a room without a care. It just meant more protection for you. Now that theyâre back, though, you have to be more careful. You canât just go panicking over nothing, not that you should have to panic while theyâre here.Â
Thatâs their job, right? Protect the omega?Â
They canât protect you if they donât know thereâs a threat in the first place.Â
âYeah.â You say, gulping down more water to think up an excuse quickly. âThought I might be dreaming for a moment, that you didn't really come back.âÂ
John approaches you slowly, kneeling down on the end of the mattress with a quiet sigh. He has to be sore after their deployment. You can tell just by the way heâs holding his shoulders, by the stiffness in the way he moves. You canât even begin to imagine the kinds of things they did, the kinds of things they went through over the last week.Â
John takes your hand, pressing it against his chest. Heâs warm underneath the shirt, and you can feel the steady beating of his heart under your palm. âWeâre real.â He says, his thumb gently stroking the back of your hand as he holds it against his chest. âWeâre really here.âÂ
You stare at his hand where it covers yours. Youâve seen it before, many times. Scarred and rough with calluses. His knuckles are dry and just slightly bruised. Did he punch someone? Or maybe he hit it against something else.Â
His hand moves, snapping you out of your thoughts. You fight the urge to flinch as he cups your cheek, his thumb brushing your skin. âYouâre thinking too much.âÂ
You swallow thickly. âWell, I didnât have much to do this last week besides think.âÂ
A smile tugs at the corner of his lips. âWeâll try to make life more interesting for you, then.â He leans forward, pressing a kiss to your forehead. âNow, letâs get these two muppets up for breakfast.âÂ
He pushes himself back up to stand, staring down at Johnny and Kyle, still sleeping. You shift onto your hands and knees, crawling over to Johnny before swinging a leg over to straddle his stomach. You lean forward, planting your hands on either side of his face, his breath catching as he begins to wake up, sensing a disturbance. You stare down at him, watching his eyes flutter before they crack open. The haze of sleep leaves his blue eyes, clarity coming back to him quickly as his lips begin to lift in a grin as he stares up at you.Â
âDidnae expect tae wake up to such a sight.â He says, voice thick with sleep as his hands come to rest on your bare thighs. âA beautiful woman on top of me? I mustâve died and gone tae heaven in my sleep.âÂ
âEven better,â You say, leaning down closer. âBecause Iâm real.âÂ
âThat ye are.â He says, slowly dragging his hands up your legs, pushing the shirt up as he goes.Â
Ghost pushes himself off the mattress, leaving the room so quickly he nearly knocks his shoulder against the doorframe. A frown pulls at your brows as you watch him go, slowly pushing yourself back up to sit on Johnnyâs stomach. Guilt starts to well up in you as you stare at the empty doorway. You hadnât meant to make him uncomfortable.Â
âDonât mind him, kitten.â Johnny says, pushing himself up to sit, sliding you backwards into his lap. âHeâs still miffed he didnât get a greetinâ yesterday.âÂ
âOh,â You say, blinking in surprise. You hadnât even thought about greeting Ghost in that moment. You had been so desperate for your alpha, and then swept up by the betas, it hadnât even crossed your mind to acknowledge Ghost. âI didnât-âÂ
âItâs not yer fault.â Johnny says, wrapping his arms around you. âHe hasnae been the most...open with ye. Itâs his own damn fault for it.âÂ
âOh, well, Iâll be sure to give him a big hug when he comes back in.â You say.Â
âPlease do.â Kyle says, rubbing his eyes where heâs laying next to you. âIâll pay to see his reaction.âÂ
All three of you burst out laughing, Johnny pressing his forehead against yours. âMissed ye, kitten.âÂ
âNot as much as I missed you.â You say, pouting.Â
Johnny chuckles, pressing a quick kiss to your lips. His hands slide to your hips as he presses another soft kiss to your lips, and then another.Â
âLet me get in on some of that.â Kyle says, pushing himself up to sit. He grips your chin in his hand, turning your face to his before pressing his lips to yours.Â
His kiss takes your breath away, deeper and more passionate than Johnnyâs had been. You hum against his lips as Johnnyâs grip on your waist tightens.Â
âChrist almighty.â Johnny breathes, staring at you and Kyle as you kiss.Â
âAlright, you three.â John says as the air in the room starts to turn musky with arousal. âLetâs feed our omega first before we get too carried away.âÂ
Kyle pulls away from you, pressing a quick kiss to your forehead.Â
âCan we...eat in here again?â You ask, wrapping an arm around Johnnyâs shoulders as you turn slightly to look up at John. You had almost forgotten about his presence, caught up in the attention from your betas. The thought of him watching the three of you has a different kind of thrill racing down your spine.Â
âOf course.â John says, bending down to kiss you.Â
Both Johnny and Kyle groan at the sight of their pack alpha kissing you, Johnnyâs cock twitching in his boxers beneath you. You press a kiss to Johnnyâs cheek after John pulls away from you before pushing yourself up to stand. You stretch your arms over your head, the shirt riding up a bit, giving both Kyle and Johnny a good view of your legs. The musky scent of arousal intensifies in the air as they stare at you, Johnny licking his lips hungrily.Â
âAlright, get out of here you cheeky little minx, otherwise theyâll never get out of bed.â John says, gently guiding you from the room.Â
You canât help the smile that tugs at your lips as you leave Johnâs room, stepping out into the hallway. Itâs much cooler outside of the room, goosebumps forming on your legs. You have half a mind to go back to your own room, but you find yourself unable to even approach the door. Memories of the fear and your panic come flooding back, the thought that someone might have snuck inside, someone might be waiting for you in there snapping to the front of your mind. Itâs a ridiculous thought. Someone would have noticed if there was an intruder, if there was someone who shouldnât be inside creeping around.Â
Your gaze flickers from your door as Ghost makes his way down the hallway, his clothes changed from what heâd been wearing to sleep in. You bite your lip as you stare at him, meeting his gaze. Perhaps it's the fear driving you forward, or maybe youâve gone slightly crazy in their absence, but you find yourself approaching him, making him stop in his tracks.Â
He eyes you as you approach, your steps quick as you try to avoid chickening out. Your mind is repeating Johnnyâs words over and over in your head, an explanation for Ghostâs behavior yesterday, and obvious annoyance at you and Johnny this morning. You wonder if heâll take it as a threat as you get closer to him, if he might snap and defend himself. Heâs completely still, not even his chest moving. Heâs watching you like a predator watches its prey, waiting for your next move.Â
Itâs like hugging a tree as you wrap your arms around his waist. Heâs stiffer than a board as you hug him, resting your face on his chest. Leather and eucalyptus and musk all float around you as you press close to him, his scent enveloping you in a hug, even if his body doesnât follow suit.Â
âWhat are you doing?â He asks, his voice rumbling deep in his chest.Â
âHugging you.â You say, tightening your hold around him. Youâve been this close to him before in your training, but this feels different. âIâm sorry for not greeting you on the tarmac. I wasnât really thinking clearly at that point.âÂ
He lets out a quiet sigh, something you probably wouldnât have noticed if you werenât so close to him. You can imagine itâs a sigh of exasperation at Johnny for spilling about his feelings. âItâs fine.â He says, awkwardly patting your back. âDonât know why you would have wanted to.âÂ
âWell, you are part of the pack.â You say. âThat should be enough reason.âÂ
You nuzzle your face against his chest, his scent going straight to the back of your brain. Your omega wants to roll in it, cover herself in it until itâs all you can smell. The intensity of his scent has something in your hindbrain purring, the sound rumbling through your chest.Â
Ghost puts his hands on your shoulders, pushing you back from him. You blink up at him blearily as your mind begins to clear a bit with the distance. âAt least put some pants on before you completely lose it.â He grumbles.Â
A small smile tugs at your lips before it falls at the thought of having to go into your room. You turn to face the door, your vision almost tunneling as you stare at it. You donât want to open it. You donât want to go in there.Â
âGhost?â You say quietly before he can walk away.Â
He turns to look at you, his eyes squinting just slightly as he frowns. âWhat?âÂ
âWill you...will you open my door for me?â You shift your weight, knowing heâs going to want a reason, an explanation for your behavior.Â
He turns fully to face you, shoulders squared as he slowly approaches, suddenly on the defensive. âWhat is it?âÂ
You shake your head. âJust a feeling.âÂ
He steps between you and the door, wrapping his fingers around the handle before he swings it open, scanning the inside. His shoulders relax just slightly and you let out a breath of air. Thereâs no one inside. No oneâs waiting for you. No one broke in last night.Â
He takes a step back before turning to you. âNothing.âÂ
You let out a sigh of relief, staring into the space that was once your nest, your safe place. You can feel Ghostâs eyes on you, waiting for an explanation for your behavior. You canât tell him the truth, despite how easy it would be. You could confess right now, admit to what happened, what you did, the mistake you made. You could drop to your knees right now, beg for forgiveness for what you did.Â
âIt was hard...while everyone was gone.â You say. Itâs not a lie. Not entirely. âMade me uneasy, being alone here. Kept thinking I was hearing things.âÂ
He doesnât believe you. You can see it in his eyes. He knows your lying, he knows youâre withholding the truth from him. You arenât, you just arenât giving him the whole truth. You had felt lonely, you had been on edge even before General Shepherd arrived and your room was bugged. Being alone was hard. Harder than you thought it would be. It would have taken its toll on you, even without the stress of your space being invaded multiple times.Â
You should have told someone. You should have called Dr. Keller right away. You should have never opened the door in the first place.Â
âThank you.â You say, slipping past him and entering your room.Â
He stands there for a few breaths, watching you warily as you open your closet, looking for something to wear. You ignore him, acting like heâs not there, but you canât hide the squaring of your shoulders, the stiffness of your movements. Youâre not sure you could resist if he pressed, if he tried to force you to tell him. Youâd spill immediately, even without him using his alpha against you.Â
The thought has another chill racing down your spine.Â
Your omega is on edge as you change with the door open, not caring as the guys move around, getting dressed to head out to grab breakfast for everyone. You hate how inconvenient it must be, but you still donât think you could handle being in the mess. Not yet. Not so soon. Youâll have to eventually, otherwise theyâll think something is up, happened, and then theyâll start questioning.Â
You couldnât handle an interrogation. Especially not their disappointed and angry faces when you confess to what you did, the mistakes you made, how you allowed someone to walk in so easily. How you left so easily with a stranger. Theyâd never trust you again.Â
They wonât trust you if you keep things from them either.Â
They have to know. They have to know General Shepherd came to base and talked to you. They have to know about you meeting their superior while they were away. A high ranking General couldnât just be on base without someone knowing, and why would he hide it? He had come to check in on your progress and how you were settling in with your pack. He would have included your pack in that questioning as well, right? Besides, there has to be cameras everywhere on base. Someone would have seen you and let them know.Â
Thereâs no way they donât know about it.Â
You stand in the doorway of your bathroom, staring at the cabinet where the broken cameras and recording devices are hidden. Theyâre broken, you ensured that. Theyâre hidden away, buried under enough stuff no one could find them unless they were purposefully looking for something.Â
You let out a breath, trying to relax as you finish your morning routine. Itâs over. Thereâs nothing that can be done now. All you can do is try to move on, try to mend the fraying bonds with your pack, heal the sense of fear and unease surrounding your safe space.Â
Maybe Dr. Keller could help. You could admit everything to her, everything that happened while she was supposed to be watching you. If you had just gone to her office that afternoon, perhaps things would have been different. She would have known, but that wouldnât have stopped the cameras from being put up. It would have just made it easier for them. Maybe they might have finished the job properly, and you wouldnât have even known. Even if you had called Dr. Keller, what kind of argument could she have made against a Commanding Officer?Â
If you told Dr. Keller now, sheâd tell your pack. Sheâs promised to keep everything between you confidential, but would something like this be an exception? Would she tell your pack anyway because she thinks itâs the best course of action to help you?Â
You want to cry. Tears are welling in your eyes as you stare in the mirror. You hardly recognize yourself. You look tired, strung out, sickly almost. Are you not, though? Is that not how you feel? You know omegas can get sick from stress sometimes, if it gets to be too much. You donât want to get sick. You donât want to be more of a burden than youâre already being. They have to be so tired after their assignment, and here you are making things harder for them.Â
âYou alright, love?âÂ
You jump, letting out a shriek as you whip around to face the door of your room. Your heart is racing as you slap a hand over your mouth, staring wide-eyed at an equally surprised Kyle. You let out a breath, slowly lowering your trembling hand as you try to calm yourself. Itâs just Kyle sneaking up on you. Not a stranger.Â
âSorry, didnât mean to startle you.â He says, brows pinching in a frown.Â
ââS okay.â You murmur, turning off the light before leaving the bathroom. âWas lost in thought.âÂ
âThe others left to grab food.â Kyle says. âTheyâll be back shortly.âÂ
You nod, trying hard not to make your trembling too visible, or give any hint at your discomfort. âOkay.âÂ
You stare at him as he leans against the doorframe. He hasnât entered your room. Heâs still standing in the doorway. The thought has a lump forming in your throat. Your bonds have frayed so much he doesnât even feel comfortable entering your space anymore. Thereâs a wall up again, and youâre only forcing it higher and higher.Â
âCome on.â He says, holding his hand out to you. âLetâs go to the rec room.âÂ
You take his offered hand, letting him pull you from your room. The door clicks closed behind you as you let him lead you down the hallway and away from the place thatâs become fuel for your nightmares.Â
Kyle sits down on the couch, pulling you down on his lap. You wrap your arm around his neck as he wraps his arms around you, enveloping you in his warmth and scent.Â
âIâm sorry for startling you.â He says softly, bringing your other hand to his lips so he can press a kiss to your wrist.Â
âItâs not your fault.â You say, leaning your head against his shoulder. âBeen on edge since everyone left.âÂ
âI bet.â Kyle leans his cheek against the top of your head. âWeâre here now. Weâre gonna fix that.âÂ
âWhat happens when you have to leave again?â You ask.Â
âYou wonât be alone again, thatâs for sure.â A different voice says.Â
You nearly jump out of Kyleâs lap as John appears in the doorway of the rec room, Johnny and Ghost right behind him. Kyleâs arms are the only thing keeping you steady as your heart nearly beats out of your chest. Youâre not sure how much more you can take, intentionally or unintentionally.Â
âI spoke with Kate this morning.â John says as he sets the food heâs carrying on the coffee table. âWeâre going to do everything in our power to avoid having you left alone again. At least one of us will be staying behind with you from now on.âÂ
Your brows pinch a little. Is that why he had been absent from the nest earlier? Youâre not quite sure what to feel. On one hand youâre relieved at the thought of not having to be alone again, but on the other hand, you donât want to disrupt their lives, their jobs. You wonder just how hard he had to fight to even get Kate to agree to something like this.Â
You also feel a bit afraid that they know, they figured out what had happened and thatâs the reason they donât trust to leave you alone again. Youâll make another stupid mistake or another risky decision that might cause you actual harm next time.Â
Kyle eases you off his lap and onto the couch beside him. Johnny sits on your other side, squishing you between them as a tray is passed into your hands. You donât feel very hungry as you stare down at the food, but you know after a meager dinner last night, you need to eat. You wonât be doing you or your pack any favors by being hungry.Â
Itâs quiet in the rec room as you eat. Itâs almost eerie how silent it is, aside from the occasional scrape of silverware on the trays. You begin to float back into the time when they were gone, the haunting silence that had settled over the barracks in their absence. Everything had seemed so still, not peaceful, but more like the very walls were holding their breath.Â
Perhaps it was in anticipation for what was to come. Perhaps somehow the very walls knew they would be beached, the safety they once promised would be upended.Â
Or maybe youâve just gone crazy.Â
You shift forward on the couch, careful not to tip your tray over as you grab the remote from the coffee table, turning the TV on.Â
âFinally! I couldnae handle the silence much longer.â Johnny exclaims, letting out a relieved sigh.Â
The corners of your lips pull up in a smile as you pass the remote off to him, letting him search for something bearable to watch on early morning TV. Youâre glad at least you werenât alone in your distaste for the silence. You curl up closer to Gaz, reminding yourself that itâs not a dream, that they really are here. They really did come back.Â
Now you just have to move on and put the nightmare of what happened behind you.Â
As the days pass, things begin to return to normal. The guys start their normal routine of training and running drills almost immediately. To avoid being stuck in the barracks alone, you ask to go with them, blaming it on the distance and your need to be clingy still. At first you were afraid someone would take advantage of the barracks being empty again, but every search has come up empty handed. No more cameras, no more recording devices.Â
Whoever it was who planted them must have given up, or perhaps the risk of doing it with the entire pack back on base was too high.Â
Despite this fact, you spend the least amount of time in your room as possible. Even when you canât go to watch them train or run drills, you spend your time in Johnâs room, or in the rec room. At night you rotate between John, Kyle, and Johnny, opting to sleep with them over spending a night alone in your room.Â
As you discussed, you begin seeing Dr. Keller twice a week. Youâre not quite sure what she told John to convince him it was necessary, but whatever it was, it hadnât given away any of your secrets. It probably hadnât taken much to convince him to say yes, given your current state and his worry about you.Â
You know heâs worried. You can see it when he looks at you, like you might snap if he stares too hard. Youâve seen the way his hands twitch when Johnny holds you too tightly or gets too rough in his affection, like heâs worried you might shatter.
Itâs reassuring to see the distance has not just affected you. Johnny holds you tighter than he used to, Kyle stands closer to you like heâs trying to fuse you both into one. Even Ghost has started hovering closer, using his hands to steer you and guide you when youâre around others that arenât part of your pack.Â
Youâve started eating in the mess again, knowing you can only avoid it for so long before theyâll start getting suspicious and asking questions. You still feel paranoid, being around the other soldiers on base. You canât help but be suspicious that it was one of them that planted the cameras, that it was one of them that tried to get into your room that night. Who would willingly breach such sacred ground and invade an omegaâs space like that, you couldnât even begin to guess. Â
Sure, some of them still stare at you, but most of them now ignore your existence. Youâre no longer a spectacle, not after a few weeks on base, not that youâre a claimed omega now.Â
That wonât stop some alphas.Â
Going up against your pack, though? That would take one hell of a cocksure alpha.Â
Just like the one that invaded your safe space.Â
It had to have been an alpha. Sure, that beta soldier had entered the barracks, but to go so far as to put up cameras and try to come back and get into your room? That takes a special kind of audacity, something only an alpha could possess.Â
So life has gone back to normal, or at least as normal as it can be after what happened.Â
The return to normal hasnât all been good, though. Your nightmares have returned, coming on quickly as soon as you began to settle into routine again. The real nightmare has passed, so now your mind has to plague itself with nightmares that have already happened. Things that canât even hurt you anymore.Â
You start avoiding sleep again, despite your work with Dr. Keller, too afraid to risk having a nightmare in front of one of them again. The last thing you need is to have to spill about your nightmare. You might not be able to stop and wind up spilling about what happened while they were gone too.Â
Unfortunately, things donât work that way. They never work that way for you.Â
Someone is screaming. Your body feels like itâs being constricted by a snake, crushing and painful as youâre clutched desperately against your motherâs chest. Sheâs the one thatâs screaming, the sound hurting your ears. Your face is pressed against her shoulder, into the softness of her sweater. Itâs the pink one, the one she made. Her favorite.Â
Thereâs knocking coming from somewhere, a door handle jiggling. Itâs locked, but you can hear someone trying to get in, multiple people based on the voices from the other side. You donât know who it is. You donât recognize any of them. You canât even make out what it is their saying, if theyâre saying anything at all. The voices sound more like the unintelligible roar of monsters, the ones you used to be afraid of as a child.Â
Everything is muted by the blood pulsing in your ears, drowning out everything but the jiggling of the door handle. Someoneâs trying to break in. Someone is breaking in. You can make out the thuds against the door, the desperate attempts to get inside, to get to you.Â
The arms around you tighten, pressing your face harder into the soft yarn of the sweater. You inhale the familiar scent of brown sugar and vanilla, the scent surrounding you and enveloping you in a sense of safety. Nothing can get you. Nothing can hurt you.Â
Thatâs not true, though. You know itâs not.Â
Thereâs a bang as the door is finally forced open, the screaming getting louder as footsteps enter the room. Youâre shaking, trembling in your motherâs arms as she clings to you desperately, just like you used to cling to her when you thought there was a monster under your bed.Â
The monsters were real, you realize as you desperately cling to your mother, just as tightly as sheâs clinging to you.Â
Hands grab at you, claws digging into your skin, tentacles wrapping around your body, trying to pull you from your motherâs grip. You can hear her pleading, begging, screaming at them not to take you, not to separate you. Youâll never see her again if they manage to pull you from her. Theyâll take you away, hide you away, keep you from the warm comfort of her embrace.Â
You let out a scream of your own as youâre yanked from her grasp, your arms reaching for her as the monsters pull you from the source of your safety and comfort. The last thing you see is your motherâs grief stricken face before the door slams in your face.Â
A scream tears from your lips as youâre pulled from sleep suddenly. Youâre falling, hitting the tile floor with a thud. Your shoulder cracks against the unforgiving floor, making you yelp. The blanket has tangled around your legs, rendering you immobile from the waist down.Â
The frantic pounding of boots on the floor meets your ears, seconds before the four members of your pack are sprinting into the rec room. Their faces look just as frantic as their steps had been, concern laced with fear laced with worry. You hadnât even realized theyâd returned already. They had been at their afternoon drills while you stayed in the rec room watching TV, slowly succumbing to the exhaustion thatâs been plaguing you.Â
âWhat is it? What happened?â Kyle asks, moving to step forward but John beats him to it.Â
âFell off the couch.â You say, pushing yourself up to sit, wincing at the pain in your shoulder. Thereâs tears sliding down your cheeks despite you fighting the remnants of your terror and pain from the nightmare.Â
âI think thereâs more to it than that.â John says, kneeling down in front of you.Â
You want to confess everything. How you havenât been sleeping well for weeks now since your heat, how you keep having horrible nightmares about your past, what happened while they were away, how the nightmares have returned. Your breath catches in your throat as you stare at John, the tears sliding down your cheeks as you give up trying to control them. Guilt plagues you as you stare at the worried face of your alpha. He just wants to help you, he just wants to take care of you, but he canât if youâre keeping things from him, if youâre lying to his face.Â
âI had a nightmare.â You say quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. You clutch your arm to your chest, trying not to move your shoulder too much.Â
John lets out a quiet sigh, his fingers lifting to press against your shoulder, feeling around the joint. You wince as he hits a tender spot, the pain sharp, but not horrible. Youâve certainly felt worse things.Â
He turns to the others behind him, all of them staring at you with equally worried looks on their faces. âGet me an ice pack.â He says before turning back to you.Â
He lifts you off the floor, placing you back on the couch before untangling the blanket from around your legs. Johnny grabs an ice pack as Kyle moves to sit next to you on the couch, draping his arm across the back, projecting his scent to try and help you relax. John sits on the edge of the coffee table, staring at you. Despite the worry still present on his face, his eyes are sharp. You canât help but feel like youâre suddenly in an interrogation. Theyâve done this before, probably many times, though likely not as gently as they are now. Youâre terrified still at the way they shift so easily into the mindset of a soldier. You canât even imagine what it would be like if they were serious in their interrogation of you.Â
âHow long have you been having nightmares?â John asks as Johnny takes a seat on the other side of you, passing you the ice pack.Â
You press it against your shoulder, trying to keep your thoughts straight. You have to try not to spill anything, try not to confess to all of your sins, all of your stupid mistakes now. Your gaze drops to your lap, avoiding the looks of the two alphas staring at you. Ghost has moved to stand behind John, his arms crossed as he watches the exchange. You can feel the pressure of their gaze, the sharpness of it digging into your skin like knives.Â
âA couple weeks.â You admit, unable to even think of a lie. You donât want to lie now, not with them staring at you so intensely. Theyâd know. Theyâd be able to tell before the words even left your mouth. âSince my heat ended.âÂ
âIs that why youâve been avoiding sleeping?â John asks.Â
You wince at his question. Of course he noticed. Why wouldnât he? Heâs been trained to notice weaknesses in others, gauge the capabilities of his men. Of course heâd notice youâre more tired than usual, not sleeping quite as much. He probably even knew all the times you woke up in the night when you slept next to him. Â
You nod, still staring at your lap, too afraid to see the disappointment in his eyes.Â
âWhy didnât you say anything?â He breathes, almost sounding upset.Â
Youâve made a mistake in keeping this a secret. You regret it as soon as you hear the emotion in his voice. He thinks you donât trust them, he thinks you donât trust your alpha. You need to tell him. You need to tell him everything, but the fear keeps you paralyzed. How much more upset will he be when you confess that you kept such a major event from him, from all of them?Â
A quiet sob leaves your lips as you sit there, terrified of the reprimanding youâre sure to get. The shame burns hot in you, the reminder that youâve disappointed them. Youâve let them down and now they wonât even trust you to tell them anything.Â
âWeâre not mad at you, sweetheart.â Gaz says, shifting his arm so itâs wrapped around your shoulders, his thumb brushing the hand thatâs holding the ice pack to your shoulder. Johnny shifts just slightly closer to you, both of the betas projecting their scent around you, trying to cocoon you in their comforting presence.Â
âI just want to know why you felt it necessary to hide something like that from us.â John says, his voice softer than it had been before.Â
âI didnât want to bother you.â You find the words spilling out before you can stop them. Maybe itâs the exhaustion or the fear or your brain finally getting tired of holding everything in. This is your moment to let out a little steam, to finally release some of the pressure thatâs been building. âMy nightmares are nothing compared to the ones you all probably have and itâs stupid and I shouldnât even be having them, itâs been years since the last time I dreamed like this, and I donât even know why theyâve come back now.âÂ
âNo nightmares are stupid.â Ghost says, stepping up closer to the coffee table.Â
âWeâre here to help you.â John says, leaning his elbows on his knees. âWe canât do that if you donât tell us whatâs going on.âÂ
Guilt burns through you at his words. Heâs right. You should be honest with them, tell them everything. They canât help you, they canât keep you safe even from the things that plague your mind if they donât know about them.Â
âWhat are the dreams about?â John asks, blue eyes boring holes into you.Â
You feel small under his gaze, like you're a child again, facing down your father after doing something wrong, after making a mistake. You have made a mistake, though. Youâre facing the consequences of your mistake right now.Â
âThe day I left for the institute.â You say quietly, voice hardly more than a whisper but you know they heard you in the silence of the barracks. It feels threatening, like the walls are silently vowing to tell the truth if you donât.Â
Your pack shifts a bit at your words, sharing looks amongst themselves. They have to know what itâs like, or at least heard stories about the trauma of being pulled from your pack to be taken to a strange place, surrounded by others just like you.Â
âWhat happened that day?â Ghost asks, staring down at you.Â
You can feel his gaze piercing into you, screaming the silent threat that youâre going to tell them, no matter how long they have to sit here and wait. You donât have a choice anymore. You have to tell them.Â
Youâre warm. The ice pack pressed against your forehead does little to soothe the burning under your skin. Youâre thirsty, the two empty plastic bottles on your nightstand were not enough to ease the dryness in your mouth.Â
Hands shift the ice pack, pressing it against your cheek. Your mother is there, seated next to your bed diligently. Sheâs crying, tears sliding down her cheeks, quiet sniffles breaking the silence in the house.Â
âIâm sorry.â She whispers, bringing your hand to her lips. âIâm so sorry,â She apologizes, as if itâs her fault, as if she brought this onto you.Â
She gasps quietly as the door opens, her back stiffening as your father enters. His face is stern, mouth almost twisted with disgust as he stares at you. It feels wrong, having him invade your space. If youâd had the energy, perhaps you would have been brave enough to protest his presence.Â
âCome on.â His voice is gruff, worn down from years of smoking and yelling. âGet up.âÂ
âNo, please-â Your mother attempts to reason with him, but he wonât have it.Â
âShut up and sit down.â He snaps at her, and she has no choice but to sit back and be silent. His voice has something tingling in the back of your neck, almost like a warning. Thereâs nothing you can do, though. Youâre far too weak.Â
He moves to the side of your bed, grabbing your arm and pulling you up from the comfort of your blankets. The ice pack falls from your head, your skin prickling with warmth almost like it hadnât been there in the first place. Your brain is sluggish as you try to comprehend whatâs happening, your legs giving out as youâre forced upright. You canât get your body to work, you canât even force yourself to behave. You want to crawl back under your blankets and lay there for the rest of eternity.Â
You whine as youâre dragged from your room, knees knocking on the floor as you attempt to get your feet under you to ease the pain in your shoulder. Your father drags you into the living room, two people you donât recognize standing next to the front door.Â
âPlease, please donât do this!â Your mother pleads with him, right on his heels as he drops you in a heap in front of them. He catches her before she can rush forward to you. How you wish you could have her arms around you again, holding you and comforting you in your confusion.Â
âEnough.â Your father snaps at her, looking down at you with disgust. âSheâs no daughter of mine.âÂ
You blink up at him, the words seering through the haze, registering in your foggy mind. Tears gather in your eyes as you stare up at your parents, your siblings watching tensely from the living room as the scene unfolds before them.Â
âNo, no!â You cry as hands close around your arms, lifting you from the floor. âMama!â You scream, trying to fight them as youâre pulled from your home, your safe space, your family, your pack.Â
Your mother is yelling, fighting against your fatherâs hold around her, but itâs useless. Heâs stronger. He wants this, so no one is going to stop him. Sheâll pay later for her actions, her disagreement with him. You wonât be here to see it, though. Youâre leaving and you wonât be coming back.Â
The last thing you see as the cool air outside washes over your feverish skin is your motherâs grief stricken face before the door closes, locking you out forever.Â
Youâre dragged into the back of a van parked in the driveway. Two men in uniform climb in behind you before the doors are slammed shut. You curl up in the corner, sobbing uncontrollably. You want your mom, you want to be back in the safety of her arms, the warmth and comforting softness that only she can provide.Â
One of the men approaches you, a needle in his hand. You whimper in fear, pressing further back into the corner as he gets closer to you. He forces you down onto your stomach, the pain brief as he injects you with the sedative before he moves back to take his seat. You curl up in a ball, quietly sobbing as the drugs begin to work, your vision going hazy before youâre forced into unconsciousness.Â
âI woke up hours later at the institute.â You say, wiping at the tears streaming down your cheeks, but it does little against the cascade of tears falling from your eyes. âNever saw or spoke to my family again. They didnât even try to reach me, and I know my dad was the reason why. He hated me as soon as I presented.âÂ
âFucking hell.â Ghost breathes, hands curled into fists at his sides. You can smell the intensity of his scent above everything, the burning ozone of anger rolling off of him. It makes you wince, even though you know itâs not directed at you.Â
âThatâs why he wanted to send you so quickly.â Kyle says, his arm tightening around you.Â
âHow did he get you into FIOT so soon after your presentation?â John asks.Â
You shrug your good shoulder. âI donât know. I didnât even know heâd be sending me, much less so soon until it was happening.âÂ
âChrist,â Johnny breathes, gently taking your hand in his. âNo wonder yer havinâ nightmares, kitten.âÂ
âI havenât had this nightmare since I arrived at the institute. They started there, lasted a few weeks while I adjusted to being there.â You sniffle. âHavenât had them since, until now. Dr. Keller says itâs because I finally feel safe enough to process the trauma of it happening.âÂ
John sits up a little straighter. âIs that why she suggested seeing you multiple times a week?âÂ
You nod. âWeâre working on it. I asked her not to tell you, because I did plan on telling you eventually.âÂ
âIâm glad you told someone, at least,â He says. âAnd Iâm glad you finally told us too. We might not be able to stop the nightmares, but at least now we can help support you in whatever way you need.âÂ
âIâm sorry I didnât tell you sooner.â You say, squeezing Johnnyâs hand slightly. He was the only one that knew you were having nightmares, but you hadnât even confessed to him what was going on out of fear heâd tell the others.Â
âItâs alright, sweet girl.â John says, leaning forward to press a kiss to your forehead. âIâm glad it finally came out and now we can help you.â He wipes the tears from your cheeks, his thumb brushing your skin gently.Â
The moment is broken as your stomach growls impatiently. Itâs past your normal dinner time, your confession having kept you longer than you thought it would. You hadnât gotten in your afternoon snack either, your body having chosen to nap instead.Â
A small smile tugs at Johnâs lips. âHungry, love?âÂ
You nod. âYeah. Didnât get my snack.âÂ
âWeâll go get some food and bring it here, how does that sound?â He asks.Â
You nod. âYeah. That sounds good.âÂ
He pushes himself up to stand, his knees cracking as he does. You fight the urge to say something, squeezing Johnnyâs hand tightly.Â
âIâll stay.â Ghost says, still looking at you.Â
John looks down at you and you meet Ghostâs gaze for a moment before nodding. John presses another kiss to your head, Johnny and Kyle pressing kisses to your cheeks before they get up, leaving the rec room to get dinner for everyone.Â
Ghost moves from his spot on the other side of the coffee table, sinking down at the end of the couch. You fight the urge to stare at him in surprise. Youâre not sure youâve seen him sit anywhere but in the chair the entire time youâve been here.Â
Itâs silent between the two of you for a few moments, aside from the occasional sniffle from you. You wipe the remaining tears from your face, removing the melted ice pack from your shoulder, tossing it on the coffee table. This feels very familiar to you, this position. Youâve been here before, back when you punched the asshole alpha who insulted you.Â
âMy dad was a real asshole.âÂ
You turn your head slightly in surprise when Ghost breakâs the silence suddenly. Heâs not looking at you, his gaze distant, far away. You know that look well. Youâve seen it on him before, and also on a few omegas at the institute. Youâre sure itâs graced your face as well many times.Â
âHe was a trad alpha, real piece of shit who couldnât control his anger. Took it out on all of us. My mum, my brother, me.â He scoffs. âMum took the brunt of it, but Tommy and I faced our fair share of it too. He used to bring dangerous animals home and taunted us with them. Made me kiss a snake once. He did all kinds of horrible things to us.â His voice softens a bit in a way youâve never heard before. Youâve never seen him so vulnerable, not even when he told you about his own nightmares. âIâve never wanted an omega, because of the things my dad did to my mum. I never wanted a pack either, but...maybe something deep down in me did because I said yes to this whole experiment.âÂ
The silence hangs heavy between you for a moment. Youâre not sure what to say, or if you can even manage to say anything in response to what heâs just told you. You had no idea what his life was like growing up, except that he was also a purebred.Â
âI was always too afraid the cycle would continue, that Iâd turn out to be another piece of shit, just like my dad.â He says.Â
âI donât think youâre a piece of shit.â You say, your voice cracking a bit.Â
He huffs out a breath. âThanks.â He stares down at the coffee table, leaning his elbows on his knees. âDid your dad ever hit you?âÂ
You shake your head. âNever directly. He got rough sometimes, grabbing us, squeezing too hard, yanking us around. He never stopped my brothers when they got too rough, though. They liked to wrestle, and I wanted to join because I wanted to spend time with my cooler older brothers. Sometimes theyâd forget I was smaller than them and I got hurt a couple times. He never reprimanded them when it happened. I think he enjoyed it more than anything. He mostly just yelled a lot.âÂ
���Trad alphas only speak the language of yelling and violence.â He says. âIf my father wasnât screaming at us, his fists were getting the message across. Sometimes heâd do both at the same time.â Ghost shakes his head. âReal pieces of shit, trad alphas. Makes me sick, the kinds of things they believe in.âÂ
âIâm sorry about what happened to you.â You say, fishing for anything to follow up his confession with. Nothing feels right, nothing feels like enough.Â
He shrugs. âIt happened. Itâs in the past. He died a few years ago. Left nothing but a stain behind.âÂ
âWhat happened to your mom and brother?â You ask.Â
âTommy got into drugs for a while, but he cleaned up and got married. Mum lives with him now. Still doing well.â He says.Â
Youâre surprised by his words. Youâve always heard that omegas donât last long without their alphas. But what if their alpha was an asshole? Is the relief of their death enough to scrub out the grief of losing your alpha?Â
You stare at the side of Ghostâs head, your heart thudding in your chest. You feel sorry for him, but at the same time, youâre grateful he shared this with you. You have much more in common than you thought you did with the giant aloof alpha. Maybe, perhaps, this can be a way for the two of you to grow closer, maybe you finally have common ground that you can share with him to get him to open up to you more. You know he wants it. The revelation of his disappointment at your lack of greeting, and the fact he let you hug him is enough to tell you he wants something more with you. It might never breach the realm of romance or even a casual fling, but you canât deny the bond is there. You can feel it, the tugging in your chest as you look at him, the butterflies in your stomach when he puts a hand on your back to steer you through the crowd in the mess.Â
You want him to want you. You want him to open up, to peel the layers back and bare his very soul to you. Heâs already started. This confession is the beginning of that kind of bond between you. That he trusts you enough to tell you this makes something flutter in your chest.Â
If only he knew you were keeping something worse from him.Â
You could tell him. Confess to him right here, right now. Spill it all in this sort of mock confessional, this mock therapy session between you. Heâll be mad, but perhaps after everything thatâs transpired today, heâll be lenient. Youâre not sure you could say the same about John, though.Â
âGhost, I-â You start but he cuts you off.Â
âSimon.âÂ
âWhat?â You breathe, blinking in shock as he turns to face you.Â
âMy name. Itâs Simon.âÂ
NEXT ->
Taglist:
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#call of duty#call of duty fic#poly 141 x reader#task force 141 x reader#141 x reader#John price x reader#captain John price x reader#kyle gaz Garrick x reader#Kyle Garrick x reader#gaz x reader#Johnny soap mactavish x reader#Johnny mactavish x reader#soap x reader#Simon ghost Riley x reader#Simon Riley x reader#alpha/beta/omega dynamics#a/b/o#omegaverse
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. . . fred weasley with it girl veela girlfriend (you, bitch!)
babe.
he is your biggest fucking fan
drooling and wide eyes when he even HEARS the click of ur cunty shoes xxx
genuinely stand by the fact he has shirts with ur face on
to him, youâre everything & more
no1 advocate for anything you do
âyeah, love, you should do that. definitelyâ
âmhmm, anything you want darlingâ
GRRRRRRRR đąđąđąđą
eats up every single one of ur cunty fits
you look so damn good babe and he makes sure you know it
âyouâre the most beautiful girl i have ever seen, love. seriouslyâ
âif you donât stop smiling like that, im gonna be forced to take you against this fucking wall loveâ
OOPSIES
HOW DID THAT GET THEERRREEEE
knows the whole school and literally the whole world is obsessed with you and is here for it
(but is also not)
he loves that people know how special you are bc you fckn are
but like
when he sees whores staring at you with gaping mouths and starry eyes heâs like
sheâs MINE.
doesnât enjoy people staring at his girl
10000% the type to wrap his arms around you and pull you back into him, genuinely acting as a shield for the stares
pd(bloody)a!!!
heâs a big big fan
obvs if it makes you uncomfy, heâll understand and back off! your comfort is his main concern
HOWEVER
if you like it just like he doesâŚ
arm wrapped around you waist while youâre walking around
HANDDD HOLDING
he loves cuddling you
ur like his squishmallow đđđ
he really enjoys showing you, all the time, how much you mean to him. how obsessed he is with you. bc he wants you to know
will readily admit to the fact he is very much on ur pink bedazzled leash xxxxx
heâs ur mf bitch â¤ď¸â¤ď¸â¤ď¸
if ppl try and take the mick out of him for it he literally could not care less
and what???? itâs true
he would kiss the ground you walked on if you asked
if he notices you getting uncomfortable w ppl staring at you, heâs not afraid to confront them (if you want that)
âyeah, mind looking anywhere bloody else mate?â
âif you done leering at my girl you wanker, feel free to piss offâ
if people happen to not heed his warning, heâs not afraid to fight someone for you
(one time he did and arthur got called in to âdealâ with his sonâhe gave him an approving hug and a chocolate frog)
you & the weasels are like this đ¤
ginny does not resent you bc ur a veela, IN FACCTTTT she actually really looks up to you and admires you, knowing youâre so much more than ur beauty
sheâs wants to BE you
(apart from the dating her brother part, gag)
george calls you âlittle legendâ he thinks youâre great for making his brother so starstruck and mushy-goey all the soft things.
genuinely cannot wait for the day you become his sister in law đ¤§
after ron got over his creepy little crush, heâs grown to see you as someone he adores (even if he would never admit it) and someone he really feels safe with
you make him feel wanted in his family and actually lovedâfor that, he loves you more
charlie thinks ur an absolute riot đđ
the first time you met you had pulled a prank on the twins, turning their skin lilac and giving them unicorn horns with fuzzy purple fur everywhere (human unicorns)
heâs adored you ever since
bill loves you like a little sister and fleur and you are legit best mates!!!
arthur holds you very dear to him as he sees how good you are for his son and how much of a good individual you are in general
molly was slightly hesitant initially
BUTTT then you knitted her and arthur winter hats for christmas, sent them with a cutesy note and some sweets and she knew sheâd love you
(she really, truly does)
#fredweasleyisurseximinion
he wrote that himself xxxx
#fred weasley#fred weasley x reader#fred weasley imagine#fred weasely x y/n#harry potter#harry potter x reader#harry potter imagine#james potter x reader#james potter#fred weasley smut#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin#remus lupin imagine
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Professional Distractions
AN:Â Alright, here's the winner from the poll!! It's funny; I wrote a multi-chapter years ago about Hotch x Secretary Reader, so this brought back some memories!
Other Writing | Ao3
Pairing:Â Aaron Hotchner x Secretary!Female!Reader
Word Count: 8.9k
Rating: Everyone!
Tags/TW: canon-typical themes, fluff, flirting
Summary: Aaron Hotchner thrives on control, order, and precision in both his work and personal life. But when a new secretary is assigned to his team, Hotch finds himself facing a different kind of challenge. Confident, witty, and effortlessly intriguing, she quickly becomes a presence he can't ignore. As their professional boundaries blur, Hotch is forced to confront feelings he never expected, and the calm, controlled world he's built begins to shift in unexpected ways.
Aaron Hotchner had never been one for frivolities in the office. Efficiency was his religion, order his creed. So, when Erin Strauss approached him with the idea that the BAU needed a secretaryâhe needed a secretaryâhe balked.
"I donât need one," Hotch had said firmly, standing tall with that no-nonsense posture of his. âItâs a waste of resources.â
But Strauss was unmoved. "Itâs already done, Aaron. Sheâll start on Monday."
He felt like he'd lost before the battle had even begun. Hotch couldn't shake the sense that this was an unnecessary addition to his already perfectly functioning team. But Strauss was Strauss, and her word was law.
The team gathered in the bullpen that morning, curious about the new hire. Hotch had informed them earlier, his tone curt and business-like as usual. âSheâs just here for administrative support,â he had said. âNothing more.â
Morgan, leaning back in his chair, raised an eyebrow. "Bet she's someone Strauss sent to keep an eye on us," he joked.
JJ chuckled, but there was an undercurrent of anticipation among the team. New faces were always a point of interest, even in the most serious environments like the BAU.
The elevator doors slid open, and you stepped out, heels clicking softly on the floor. The conversations in the bullpen gradually quieted as you made your way towards Hotchâs office with a steady, assured walk.
You didnât have the overt sex appeal of someone trying too hard. Instead, it was the way you carried yourselfâyour professional yet perfectly tailored outfit, your calm but confident posture, and the intelligent glint in your eyesâthat caught their attention. Your aura spoke of someone who knew how to command a room, someone sharp, witty, and perhaps even a little mysterious.
"Sheâs... something," Morgan muttered under his breath, watching you with a grin.
"Wonder if she can keep up with Hotch," Garcia added with a playful smirk.
You reached Hotchâs office, giving the door a polite knock before stepping just inside. The faintest hint of a smile touched your lips, like you already knew what to expect.
"Mr. Hotchner?" Your voice was calm, professional, yet laced with just enough warmth to make him look up from his work.
He glanced up briefly, bracing himself for whatever distraction this was. "Hotch is fine," he replied, already setting his focus back on the file in front of him.
"Hotch, then," you echoed smoothly. The quickness of your response wasnât flirtatiousâit was simply sharp, quick-witted. You stepped fully into the office, no hesitation in your movements, and he took a second to measure you, noting that nothing about your manner felt frivolous.
"Y/N, your new secretary. But you probably already knew that," you said, standing with a straight posture, your gaze lingering just long enough to create the smallest tension in the air.
He nodded, clearly already trying to return his attention to the work on his desk. "Yes. Welcome."
You smirked slightly, sensing his resistance. "Iâm here to make your life easier, Hotch. Youâll see."
It wasnât a flirtatious comment, not in the usual sense. It was matter-of-fact, confident, and entirely unbothered by his lack of warmth. You werenât intimidated, and that threw him off just enough to pause.
She doesnât back down, Hotch thought, his fingers tightening just slightly on the papers in his hands. Most people hesitated, unsure of how to navigate his cool demeanor, but not you. You took it in stride, as if his distance wasnât something to be overcome but just another part of him to understand. He wasnât used to that.
There was a part of him that appreciated your confidence, your ability to handle things without needing constant direction. But there was also the part of him that felt something elseâa pull, an attraction that was more than professional admiration. He couldnât afford to entertain it, not here. Not with everything that was at stake. Yet, the more you settled into your role, the more difficult it became to ignore that nagging awareness of you, the way you never seemed rattled, no matter how he tried to maintain distance.
He was used to people being intimidated by him, especially new hires. But you? You werenât phased in the least. Instead, there was a kind of ease about you that made him a little uneasy, though heâd never admit it.
With that, you left his office, and for the first time in a long while, Hotch found himself momentarily distracted, wondering just what kind of dynamic you were going to bring to his carefully controlled environment.Â
Aaron Hotchner liked things a certain way. He wasnât unreasonable, but he valued precision and efficiency, especially in his professional life. His office was always meticulously organized, his schedule tightly managed, and his expectations of those who worked with him were crystal clear. So when Erin Strauss had informed him that youâhis new secretaryâwould be joining the BAU, he had been prepared to explain exactly how he liked things done.
Except, you were already a step ahead of him. And that both intrigued and unsettled him.
Hotch stood behind his desk, hands resting on the back of his chair as you entered his office with a fresh stack of files. You were calm, collected, and that faint smile you always wore, the one that hinted at a quiet confidence, made him pause.
âI thought we could go over a few things,â he said, his voice steady and professional. âJust to make sure weâre on the same page about how I like things done.â
You raised an eyebrow, a teasing glint in your eyes as you placed the files on his desk with an air of someone who already knew exactly what he was going to say.
âSure thing, Hotch. Lay it on me,â you said, leaning against the edge of his desk, clearly at ease.
Hotch hesitated for a moment, his eyes narrowing slightly as he studied you. He wasnât used to thisâsomeone who wasnât fazed by his usual no-nonsense approach, someone who seemed completely comfortable in his presence. But he pressed on, his tone measured.
âI like everything to be organized by priority,â he began, his fingers tapping lightly on the desk. âUrgent case files go on the top left, and any paperwork requiring signatures should be grouped together. My schedule needs to be updated daily, andââ
Before he could finish, you cut in smoothly, nodding as if you were already familiar with every word. âUrgent on the top left, signatures grouped. Got it. And donât worry, Iâve been updating your schedule daily since Monday. Youâve got a meeting with Strauss tomorrow at 10 a.m., by the way.â
Hotch blinked, caught off guard. âYouâve already... updated the schedule?â
You nodded, not missing a beat. âOf course. And I took the liberty of sorting through the files on your desk this morning. The reports you requested from Garcia are already at the top. Youâll find a few case notes under them that I flagged as potential priorities.â
For a moment, Hotch didnât respond, his usual calm composure faltering just slightly as he processed what youâd said. He wasnât used to someone anticipating his needs like this, certainly not after just a few days of working together. And while he was impressedâvery impressedâhe wasnât quite ready to admit it.
âEfficient,â he finally said, his voice careful, but you could tell he was weighing his words. âMore than I expected.â
You grinned, tilting your head slightly. âWhat, did you expect me to be a disaster?â
âNot at all,â he replied quickly, but you caught the smallest hint of a smile on his face, which only fueled your amusement.
âWell, I hate to disappoint,â you teased, stepping back from his desk, âbut I tend to be pretty good at what I do. Youâre just going to have to get used to it.â
Hotchâs eyes met yours, and for a moment, he felt that same unsettling sensation he had the first time youâd walked into his officeâlike you already knew him better than you should. And that both fascinated and unnerved him.
âI suppose I will,â he said quietly, his tone measured but with an undeniable undercurrent of admiration.
You smirked, sensing you had him right where you wanted him. âDonât worry, Hotch. Youâll thank me eventually.â
He raised an eyebrow, his expression returning to that familiar composed exterior, but you could see the faintest flicker of something behind his eyesâsomething that told you he wasnât as unaffected as he liked to appear.
âYou seem very sure of yourself,â he remarked, folding his arms across his chest.
You grinned. âConfidence is key, right? Besides, I have a feeling Iâll be a good fit here.â
Hotch didnât respond right away, his gaze still lingering on you as if trying to figure you out. You werenât like anyone else heâd worked with before. There was something about your calm confidence, the way you seemed to know exactly how to push just the right buttons without overstepping. It was... refreshing. Though heâd never say that out loud.
Finally, he gave a small nod. âWeâll see,â he said, his voice softer now, almost thoughtful.
You chuckled, turning to leave his office. âOh, Iâm sure we will.â
As the day progressed, Hotch found himself more impressed with you than he cared to admit. Every task heâd mentionedâevery detail, every instructionâyou had already taken care of. Without being told. It wasnât just your efficiency that caught his attention; it was the way you seemed to anticipate his needs, the way you handled everything with ease.
And the teasing? He found himself... enjoying it. More than he expected. You werenât afraid to poke at him, to challenge him in small, subtle ways that made him pause and reevaluate the dynamics between you.
By the end of the day, as you prepared to leave, Hotch caught you on your way out, standing by his office door.
âY/N,â he called, stopping you in your tracks.
You turned to face him, that same playful smile tugging at your lips. âWhatâs up, Hotch? Need something else done?â
He paused, then shook his head slightly, a rare smile threatening to surface. âNo. Just... good work today.â
You raised an eyebrow, feigning surprise. âWas that a compliment? From you?â
He chuckled softly under his breath. âDonât let it go to your head.â
You grinned, your eyes sparkling with amusement. âToo late.â
As you turned to leave, Hotch couldnât help but watch you go, still wondering how you had managed to slip past his defenses so effortlessly. You were different from anyone he had worked with beforeâconfident, witty, and always one step ahead.
And though he wasnât quite ready to admit it, Hotch knew he was impressed by you. More than he would ever let on.
Sitting back at his desk, Hotch allowed himself a rare moment of reflection. Youâd been right: you had gotten under his skin. Not in a way that made him uncomfortable, but in a way that made him want to see where this new dynamic would lead. There was something about you that he couldnât quite figure outâand maybe, for the first time in a long time, he was okay with that.
He glanced at the perfectly sorted stack of files on his desk and let out a soft sigh, knowing that working with you was going to be anything but predictable.
And for once, he didnât mind that at all.
It didnât take long for the team to notice the shift in the air. You were a natural conversationalist, quick on your feet with comebacks that were witty but never overtly crossed the line. Your presence was felt in the small waysâhow you remembered little details about each of them, how you had a knack for lightening tense moments without being overbearing.
"I like her," Morgan said one afternoon after you had walked past, easily sliding a stack of paperwork into Hotchâs office without batting an eye.
Even Reid found himself smiling more when you were around, though you were relentless in teasing him, asking if his hair always did âthat thingâ on its own or if he had a special routine for it.
"Sheâs sharp," Reid added, intrigued by how quickly you seemed to pick up on the rhythms of the team.
"Too sharp, if you ask me," Garcia quipped, though her grin suggested she approved."She's like⌠intimidatingly hot," Garcia added, wide-eyed. "And those jokes? Even I blush."
JJ raised an eyebrow. "You think Hotch is... okay with her?"
Morgan laughed. "Oh, heâs pretending to be annoyed, but I bet heâs secretly amused."
And that was exactly the case. As much as Hotch tried to resist it, he found himself surprised by how often you caught him off-guard with your clever remarks. He wasnât used to someone challenging himânot like this, in such subtle, intelligent ways.
But Hotch? He remained a fortress. He didnât engage in your flirtation, not at first. He was polite, distant, keeping things strictly business even when you blatantly teased him about how serious he was.
âDo you ever smile?â you asked one afternoon, leaning over his desk again in that same casual-yet-familiar way.
âOn occasion,â he responded coolly.
âHmm. Iâll make it my mission to see that someday.â
He said nothing, though the corner of his mouth twitchedâjust a bit.
It was during a late-night case review when you knocked on his door and stepped inside, holding a cup of coffee. "I figured you could use this," you said, setting it down with a small smile.
âThank you,â he said, eyes narrowing as he assessed you, trying to figure out what your game was.
âCareful,â you said, your tone light but teasing, âI might make you smile if youâre not too careful.â
For a second, his lips twitched, but he caught himself just in time. âI doubt that.â
âI love a challenge,â you responded without missing a beat, walking back to your desk with a slight grin.
And despite himself, Hotch found that he didnât entirely mind the challenge either.
After a particularly long and grueling case, the team decided to go out for drinks to unwind. You, of course, joined without hesitation, slipping seamlessly into their social dynamic just as you had into their professional one.
As the drinks flowed, the conversation turned to you. Morgan, ever the instigator, leaned forward with a grin. "So, Y/N," he started, "youâve been working with Hotch for a while now. Whatâs your take on him?"
You smirked, taking a sip of your drink before responding. "Hotch? Heâs⌠everything."
The table quieted, and a few eyebrows shot up.
"Everything?" JJ asked, a smile tugging at her lips. "Care to elaborate?"
You shrugged, your tone playful but sincere. "I mean, heâs intelligent, strong, capable⌠and really attractive."
Garcia let out a small gasp, her eyes widening. "WaitâHotch? Youâre into Hotch?"
"How could I not be?" you laughed, setting your glass down with a casual ease. "Heâs literally my dream man. Hot, smart, and way more fascinating than most people give him credit for."
Rossi, who had been quietly nursing his drink, raised an eyebrow. "Dream man, huh? I didnât see that coming."
Morgan leaned back, clearly enjoying this turn of events. "Youâve got it bad, girl."
You smirked at him, completely unbothered by their teasing. "Iâm just honest."
Emily, intrigued by your boldness, laughed. "I gotta admit, I didnât peg you for a Hotch fan either."
"Oh my God," Garcia whispered dramatically, eyes wide. "Does Hotch even know?"
You rolled your eyes with a grin. "I mean, he will."
The table erupted into laughter, the team clearly amused by your boldness. Morgan, however, wasnât done teasing. "Youâre telling me if Hotch were sitting right here, youâd tell him to his face?"
Without missing a beat, you raised an eyebrow. "Absolutely."
And as if the universe had a sense of humor, Hotch, who had been at the bar talking to the bartender, chose that exact moment to return, taking a seat next to you.
"Tell me what to my face?" he asked, his voice low and curious as he glanced around the table.
You didnât even blink. Turning to him, you smiled. "That I think youâre the hottest, smartest man in the room."
The entire table fell into a stunned silence. Even Morgan, who had been leading the teasing, looked impressed.Â
Hotch, however, raised an eyebrow, clearly caught off guard. He wasnât used to being the subject of such straightforward comments, especially not in front of the entire team. There was a beat of silence, and in that moment, Hotch felt the weight of their eyes on him. Normally, he would brush off a comment like this, keep things professional, deflect the attention. But something about the way you said itâso casual, so unapologeticâleft him uncharacteristically rattled.
She canât be serious, he thought, though there was no mistaking the sincerity in your tone. For the briefest second, his mind racedâhow could someone as confident, as intelligent, as you be interested in him? He was used to being admired for his work ethic, his leadership, but this was something different. Something personal.
The idea of being seen in that way, especially by you, was both unexpected and, if he were honest with himself, a little thrilling. But he couldnât afford to let it show. Not here. Not in front of the team. So he did what he always didâhe kept his face neutral, his words careful, even as his heart beat just a little faster than before.
"Youâre serious?" he asked, his tone careful, as though he were waiting for the punchline.
You smiled, unwavering. "Very."
There was a beat of silence, the tension palpable, but not uncomfortable. Finally, Hotchâs lips curved into the slightest of smiles, something rare for him. "I see."
Morgan burst into laughter, clapping his hands together. "Well, damn, Hotch! I think sheâs got you beat."
Garcia, still wide-eyed, leaned forward, her voice a loud whisper. "Do you like⌠like him?"
You turned to her, grin still intact. "Yes, Penelope, I do. I have good taste."
Hotch sat quietly beside you, a bit overwhelmed but also⌠intrigued. You werenât like anyone heâd ever worked with before. You were confident, intelligent, and you clearly didnât care about anyoneâs opinions. You liked him, and you werenât afraid to say it.Â
Reid changed the subject, without even realizing so, but Hotchâs mind was still on your comments.Â
Finally, he cleared his throat. "I think itâs time I head out," he said, standing and adjusting his suit jacket. His eyes lingered on you for just a moment longer than necessary. "Goodnight, everyone."
As Hotch walked away, the table erupted into more laughter, but you sat back, utterly unphased. You knew it wasnât over. Not by a long shot.
The next day, Garcia wasted no time in rushing into Hotchâs office with her usual enthusiasm.
"Hotch, I canât believe you just walked away last night!" she exclaimed, eyes wide with disbelief.
Hotch looked up from his paperwork, raising an eyebrow. "Walked away from what, exactly?"
Garcia huffed, placing her hands on her hips, her bright and colorful outfit a stark contrast to Hotchâs meticulously organized office. âOh, donât play dumb, Hotch. You know exactly what Iâm talking about.â
Hotch leaned back in his chair, his expression unchanging but his curiosity piqued. âEnlighten me.â
Garcia dramatically threw herself into one of the chairs in front of his desk, eyes wide and voice a conspiratorial whisper. âY/N! Last night! She said youâre the hottest, smartest man in the room, and you just walked away like it was nothing! Do you realize how monumental that was?â
Hotch fought back the smallest of smiles, keeping his voice even. âI recall the conversation. I didnât think it required a response in front of the team.â
Garcia stared at him, dumbfounded. âAaron. You have to be kidding me. Do you know how many women would say something like that to your face? And in front of everyone? She practically handed you the keys to a brand new chapter of life, and you walked away!â
Hotch let out a slow breath, shaking his head slightly. âItâs not that simple, Garcia.â
âOh, but it is that simple!â she shot back, leaning forward. âIâve seen a lot of things in my time here, but never in a million years would I have thought someone would be so bold with youâand that youâd find it amusing! You didnât even try to hide it.â
Hotch paused, letting her words sink in. Garcia was right, in a way. You were different. You didnât play the games others did, and your boldness wasnât born of carelessnessâit was confidence, intelligence. And that intrigued him more than he had admitted, even to himself.
Still, he shook his head. âWe work together, Garcia. I canât cross that line.â
Garcia rolled her eyes. âPlease. If thereâs anyone who could handle both a professional and personal relationship, itâs you two. Youâre like... two perfectly matched puzzle pieces, and I never say that about people who work here.â
Hotch glanced at the door for a moment, thinking. Heâd be lying if he said he hadnât replayed the conversation from last night in his head. The way you had so confidently and calmly told him exactly what you thoughtâright in front of the entire team. It had thrown him off, but in a good way. A way he wasnât entirely used to.
âIâll handle it,â he said after a long pause, looking back at Garcia.
Her eyes lit up. âHandle it? Do you mean like actually do something about it? Because if you donât, she will! I mean, the girl literally told you she thinks youâre the best man in the room. Hotch, you have to act!â
He gave her a look. âI said Iâll handle it.â
Garcia stood, grinning as she made her way to the door. âYou better, or Iâll handle it for you. And trust me, you donât want that.â
As she left, Hotch allowed himself a moment to sit back and think. Garcia wasnât wrong. If he didnât make a move, you likely would. And the more he thought about it, the more he realized he didnât mind that idea. Maybe, for once, it wouldnât be such a bad thing to let someone else take the lead.
You were at your desk, typing away when Hotchâs office door opened. You glanced up to find him standing there; his usual composed expression softened just a fraction.
âY/N, do you have a minute?â he asked, his voice steady.
âOf course,â you replied, standing up and following him into his office, your curiosity piqued by the sudden request.
He closed the door behind you, the soft click of the latch making the room feel smaller, more intimate. You raised an eyebrow, folding your arms casually as you stood in front of his desk.
âWhatâs up, Hotch?â you asked, your tone light but aware that something was brewing beneath the surface.
He didnât immediately sit down, instead remaining on his feet as he faced you. âAbout last nightââ
You smirked, cutting him off. âYou mean the part where I told you youâre the hottest, smartest man in the room?â
Hotchâs lips twitched, the smallest hint of amusement flashing across his face. âThat part, yes.â
You tilted your head, waiting for him to continue.
âI wanted to make sure you understand that... while I appreciate your honesty, there are boundaries we need to maintain at work,â he said, his tone even but not dismissive.
Your smirk softened into a more thoughtful expression. âIâm aware. But if I remember correctly, I wasnât exactly talking at work.â
He paused, clearly considering your point. âThatâs true,â he conceded.
âHotch,â you began, stepping a little closer, your voice lowering just a fraction, âIâm not here to make your life more complicated. But Iâm not one to pretend either. Youâre smart, and I know youâve noticed the way we work together, the way we... get along.â
He didnât respond right away, his dark eyes studying you intently. You had always been direct, and it was something he respected, but now, standing so close, it was more than just a professional admiration. It was something deeper, something that had been brewing for weeks, if not longer.
âI have,â he admitted, his voice softer now, almost contemplative.
âSo what are you going to do about it?â you asked, your tone teasing, but there was an underlying sincerity in your question.
Hotch took a deep breath, his eyes still locked on yours. For a moment, the air between you seemed to thicken, the unspoken tension finally surfacing.
âIâll figure something out,â he said, his tone more gentle than you had ever heard from him before.
You smiled, stepping back just enough to give him space. âIâll be waiting.â
With that, you turned and left his office, leaving Hotch standing there, wondering just when he had started to consider the possibility of more.
The days after your conversation with Hotch carried on much like before: cases, paperwork, and the steady hum of the BAU. But now, there was an unmistakable tension between you and Hotch, a thread pulling tighter with each passing day. It wasnât uncomfortable; in fact, it was almost... fun.
You enjoyed testing the limits of his calm exterior, watching for the slightest crack in his composed demeanor. Though Hotch stayed focused, that flicker of amusement in his eyes gave him away.
The rest of the team noticed, too, particularly Morgan and Garcia. Morgan would occasionally shoot Hotch a sly look, silently encouraging him to do something about the growing tension. Garcia, meanwhile, gave you conspiratorial smiles, her curiosity clearly piqued by whatever she suspected was brewing between the two of you.
One afternoon, you couldnât help yourself. You wandered into Hotchâs office under the guise of bringing him some updated case files. You knocked lightly, then stepped inside before he could respond, a habit youâd developed over the past few weeks.
Hotch barely looked up from his paperwork as you entered, his brow furrowed in concentration.Â
âY/N,â he acknowledged, his tone calm but not dismissive.Â
He knew it wasnât just the paperwork that had him distractedâit was you. Youâd been working at the BAU for a short time, but you had already managed to throw him off his usual rhythm. He wasnât used to thisâfeeling something more than just professional respect for someone in the office. It unsettled him.
He told himself that it wasnât anything serious, that he could keep it under control, but whenever you were in the room, there was an awareness that lingeredâsomething beyond the simple back-and-forth of a working relationship. He glanced up briefly, bracing himself for the easy confidence in your expression that always made him feel like you saw more than you let on.
âWhat do you need?â he asked, trying to keep his focus steady. He couldnât afford distractions. Not now.
âOh, nothing urgent,â you said, your voice light as you placed the files on the corner of his desk. âJust thought you might like a little company. Youâve been holed up in here for hours. Starting to wonder if youâre avoiding me.â
He glanced up, his dark eyes meeting yours briefly before returning to the document in front of him. âIâm not avoiding you,â he said evenly. âJust busy.â
âMm-hmm,â you hummed, stepping closer, leaning against his desk. âYou say that, but Iâm starting to think youâre avoiding me because I might be distracting you. Donât worry, Hotch, I wonât take it personally.â
His eyes flicked up to yours again, this time lingering a little longer. âYouâre not distracting me,â he replied, but there was the faintest trace of amusement in his voice.
You raised an eyebrow, clearly not buying it. âYou sure? I mean, I wouldnât blame you if I was. Itâs kind of my specialty.â
Hotch set his pen down, finally leaning back in his chair, giving you his full attention. âYour specialty?â he asked, a hint of curiosity creeping into his voice. âAnd what exactly does that entail?â
You smiled, leaning in just slightly. âIâm good at getting under peopleâs skin... in a good way.â
His lips twitched, the barest hint of a smile threatening to appear. âIâm not so easily rattled,â he said, his tone challenging.
âOh, I donât know about that,â you replied, your voice soft but teasing. âIâve noticed that you seem a little... different lately. Less of that âstoic FBI bossâ thing youâve got going on. Could be me, though.â You tilted your head, eyes gleaming with mischief.
Hotch didnât respond right away, his gaze steady, his expression unreadable. But you could see the faintest crack in his armorâjust enough to know you were getting to him.
âI think you overestimate your influence,â he said finally, though the amusement in his tone betrayed him.
You smiled wider, clearly enjoying the challenge. âMaybe. Or maybe youâre just underestimating how much fun Iâm having seeing if I can make you crack.â
Hotch leaned forward, resting his elbows on his desk, his eyes locked on yours with that intense focus he was known for. âYou think Iâm going to crack?â
You shrugged, unphased by his scrutiny. âEveryone has a breaking point, Hotch. Even you.â
He didnât answer, but the way his eyes held yours for just a second too long told you everything you needed to know. You were getting to him, whether he wanted to admit it or not.
Before the silence could stretch too far, you stood up straight, backing away just a little. âIâll let you get back to your very important paperwork. Wouldnât want to be the one responsible for you losing focus,â you said with a smirk.
âAppreciated,â Hotch replied, his voice low and controlled, but there was a new glint in his eyes. âIâm sure I can handle it.â
You gave him a playful wink before turning on your heel and walking out, leaving him sitting there, slightly amused but clearly rattledâjust as you intended.
The tension between you and Hotch continued to simmer, but now, it was more playful than before. You took every opportunity to poke at him, using your wit and quick remarks to see how far you could push before he finally let something slip.
One day, you were both in the conference room, going over some reports. The rest of the team was out in the bullpen, busy with their own tasks, but you and Hotch were alone.
âLooks like weâve got a lot of paperwork to get through,â you said, flipping through a stack of files. âYou really should invest in a better system. Maybe hire a secretary... oh wait, thatâs me.â
Hotch glanced at you, his expression neutral, though you could see the faintest glint of humor in his eyes. âYouâre doing a fine job. No need to hire anyone else.â
You smirked. âFine job, huh? Just fine?â
He didnât bite, instead focusing on the papers in front of him. âYouâre very efficient.â
You leaned a little closer, lowering your voice just slightly. âEfficient? Thatâs the best youâve got? Iâve been called a lot of things in my time, but efficient doesnât exactly scream âcompliment.ââ
Hotch finally looked up, raising an eyebrow. âWhat would you prefer?â
You tapped your chin thoughtfully, pretending to consider the question. âOh, I donât know. Maybe something a little more... creative? Stunning? Irreplaceable?â
His lips quirked in what could have been a smile. âIâll keep that in mind.â
Satisfied with your small victory, you leaned back, crossing your arms with a satisfied grin. âGood. Iâd hate for you to hold back on my account.â
Before Hotch could respond, Morgan walked into the room, interrupting the moment. âHey, Hotch, weâve got a lead on the case. You ready?â
Hotch stood up, giving you one last glance before nodding. âLetâs go.â
You watched as they left, that familiar flutter in your stomach returning. Youâd been teasing him relentlessly, but the way Hotch handled it only made you more intrigued. He never gave too much away, but there were moments, small cracks in his usual control, that told you you were getting under his skin in the best possible way.
By the time Friday rolled around, the team decided to go out for drinks again, needing a break from the stress of the week. You joined them, of course, slipping into your usual spot at the bar. As always, the conversation flowed easily, the team laughing and unwinding together.
But you couldnât help but notice Hotch, sitting across from you, his attention shifting your way every so often. He wasnât as reserved as heâd been in the past, and you found yourself wondering just how much further you could push him.
âYouâve been quiet tonight, Hotch,â you said, leaning forward slightly. âSomething on your mind?â
He glanced at you, a small, unreadable smile on his lips. âJust thinking.â
âAbout me, maybe?â you teased, your voice light but with an edge of curiosity.
Hotchâs eyes met yours, and for a brief moment, something flickered in his gazeâsomething you couldnât quite read. But instead of answering, he just took a sip of his drink, letting the silence linger.
âCareful, Hotch,â you said with a smirk. âYouâre starting to look like youâre actually enjoying yourself.â
His lips quirked again, but this time, he didnât deny it. âMaybe I am.â
Your heart skipped a beat, but you didnât let it show. Instead, you leaned back in your chair, satisfied that you had gotten another small victory. This was becoming a gameâone you were both enjoying far more than youâd anticipated.
And you had a feeling that sooner or later, Hotch was going to make his move.
The conversation shifted as drinks were passed around, laughter bubbling up among the team. You found yourself in easy conversation with Morgan and Prentiss, but every now and then, your eyes would drift back to Hotch, catching him watching you in those quiet moments between interactions.
It wasnât long before Garcia, after a few drinks, leaned over the table toward you with a wide grin.
âOkay, Y/N, letâs get back to the real topic,â she began, her eyes sparkling with mischief. âWhatâs your move with Hotch?â
You raised an eyebrow, amused by her boldness. âMy move?â you asked, though you already knew where she was going.
Emily grinned, leaning in as well. âOh, come on, you basically laid it all out there last time we went out. Now the question is, what happens next?â
You laughed, feeling the teamâs eyes on you, and shrugged, completely at ease. âI think weâll let Hotch decide that,â you said, glancing at him from across the table.
Morgan smirked. âYouâre telling me youâre just gonna wait for Hotch to make the move? You know heâs not exactly the type toââ
âTo what?â Hotch interrupted, his voice calm but with a hint of amusement as he joined the conversation, eyes now fully on you.
Morgan chuckled. âI was just saying that youâre not exactly the type to, you know, make a move in these situations.â
The table erupted in quiet laughter, everyone clearly enjoying the banter. But Hotch, ever composed, leaned back in his seat and looked at you, his expression soft but serious.
âMaybe I surprise people sometimes,â Hotch said, his voice low enough that only you could hear it over the chatter.
Your eyes locked with his, and for a moment, the world around you seemed to fade. You could tell there was something unspoken in his words, something that hinted at more than just a challenge. Your heart raced, but you kept your composure, offering him a small, knowing smile.
Before anyone could say more, Hotch stood up, drawing the attention of the team. âI think itâs time I head out,â he said, his gaze briefly lingering on you.
Morgan raised his glass. âAlways leaving early, boss man.â
Hotch gave him a small, amused nod before glancing back at you. âY/N, do you mind giving me a ride back to the office? I left my car there.â
There was no hesitation in your response. âSure.â
The team exchanged knowing glances as you both said your goodbyes, and once outside the bar, the cool evening air hit your skin, but the tension between you and Hotch kept the night warm. The car ride back to the office was filled with comfortable silence, the kind that spoke more than words ever could.
You pulled up to the BAU parking lot, the building mostly dark except for the faint glow of a few security lights. Hotch turned to you as you cut the engine, his eyes reflecting the low light.
âThank you,â he said quietly, his voice softer than usual.
âNo problem,â you replied, sensing that something more was on the tip of his tongue.
For a moment, neither of you moved, the air between you thick with the unresolved tension from weeks of lingering looks and quiet conversations. Finally, Hotch broke the silence, his voice steady but laced with something deeper.
âY/N, about everything youâve saidâabout me,â he began, his eyes holding yours. âI didnât respond the way I should have before. I wasnât sure how to navigate it, but... I havenât stopped thinking about it.â
You tilted your head, intrigued but calm. âAnd now?â
Hotch paused, taking a deep breath before continuing. âNow, I think Iâve decided.â
Your heart skipped a beat as he leaned in just slightly, his gaze never wavering from yours. âIâve spent a long time keeping things... separate,â he said, his voice lower, more intimate. âBut I donât want to ignore whatâs in front of me anymore.â
You smiled, feeling the weight of his words sink in. âSo youâre saying you do make the move sometimes?â
A rare smile tugged at the corner of his lips. âMaybe I just needed the right person to make me want to.â
And with that, Hotch closed the small gap between you, his hand reaching out to lightly brush your arm. It wasnât rushed, wasnât impulsive. It was deliberate, intentional, and filled with the promise of something more. When his lips finally met yours, it was soft but firm, like everything you had been waiting for had just clicked into place.
Pulling back just slightly, he looked at you, the usual intensity in his eyes now tempered with something new. âDinner next week?â
You grinned. âIâll be waiting.â
And as he stepped out of the car, you couldnât help but feel that the boundaries between you had finally shifted in the best possible way.
Hotch had always been the kind of man who liked things done a certain wayâorganized, thoughtful, and maybe a bit old-fashioned. So, when he offered to pick you up for your date, you couldnât help but tease him a little.
âI couldâve driven myself, you know,â you said with a playful smile as you slipped into the passenger seat of his black SUV.
Hotch, ever composed, shot you a small glance. âI like to do things properly.â
You raised an eyebrow, amused. âProperly? What, are you going to ask my father for permission, too?â
He smirkedâjust the barest hint of amusement playing at his lips. âI considered it.â
You let out a laugh, settling into the seat. âOld-fashioned, huh? I didnât peg you as the type, Hotch.â
âI donât think thereâs anything wrong with a little tradition,â he replied, his eyes focused on the road, though you could see a glint of humor in them.
You leaned back in your seat, your voice teasing. âNo complaints from me. But donât expect me to be swooning over your chivalry.â
He chuckled under his breath, surprising you. It wasnât often you heard him laugh, and when it did happen, it was always low, quietâlike a secret only a few were privileged to hear.
âNoted,â he said simply, but you could tell he wasnât entirely unamused by your teasing. And that made you all the more curious to see how far you could push him tonight.
Dinner was a surprising success. Youâd expected Hotch to be his usual composed self, always in control of the situation, but as the evening progressed, you realized there was more to him than the stoic leader you were used to seeing at work. He wasnât exactly playful, but there was a dry wit to him, a subtle humor that came out when he was relaxed. And tonight, for the first time, you saw that side of him more clearly.
âAdmit it,â you said, leaning forward slightly as the waiter refilled your wine glasses. âYouâve been looking forward to this.â
Hotch tilted his head, his eyes meeting yours. âI wonât deny that.â
He surprised himself with the honesty of his response. Normally, he wouldnât have indulged in something so personal, especially not during a conversation with a colleague. But this wasnât the office. Here, under the dim lights of the restaurant, it was different. He was different.
He watched as you smirked, your chin resting in your hand, completely at ease. You had this way of disarming him with a simple look, a shift in your tone that made him feel more like a person and less like the always-in-control Unit Chief he was used to being. It was unsettling how quickly youâd managed to make him lower his guard, even for a moment.
How long has it been since Iâve felt like this? The thought crept up on him, unbidden. He couldnât even remember the last time someone made him forget about the weight of his responsibilities, even if just for an evening. There was something easy about being around you, something he hadnât expected but found himself wanting more of, even if he couldnât quite admit it to himself yet.
You smirked, resting your chin in your hand. âSee, you can be fun.â
âIâm not as rigid as you think,â he replied, a faint smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.
âOh, I know,â you teased. âYouâre just selective about when you let it show.â
He didnât answer right away, his gaze steady and thoughtful, and for a moment, you felt the familiar tension between youâthe same pull that had been simmering beneath the surface for weeks. But just as you opened your mouth to speak again, Hotchâs phone buzzed on the table.
The moment the sound broke through, you both knew what it meant. A case.
As you laughed together over the last few sips of wine, the soft clinking of glasses and the gentle hum of conversation around you made the world feel smaller, more intimate. Hotchâs eyes lingered on you a little longer, and you could sense that rare ease in his posture, a subtle but meaningful shift away from the controlled, composed man you were used to seeing in the office.
But then, his phone buzzed against the table, shattering the moment like a pebble hitting calm water. Hotchâs hand paused before picking it up, his gaze briefly flickering with something close to regret. He already knew what it was. So did you.
As he glanced at the screen, you saw the professional mask slip back into place, the rare vulnerability gone in an instant. His shoulders straightened, his jaw set, and that familiar intensity returned.Â
"Itâs from Garcia," he said quietly, the warmth from moments before replaced by the familiar seriousness of a case.
For a second, he didnât say anything further, his eyes resting on the screen as if weighing the decision to cut the evening short. His lips pressed into a thin line, betraying the disappointment he wouldnât voice. Finally, he glanced up at you, offering an apologetic smile that didnât quite reach his eyes.Â
"Iâm sorry," he said, his voice quieter now, as if reluctant to pull himself away from the moment.
You leaned back in your chair, letting out a soft sigh. "Comes with the territory, right?" you replied, understanding but equally disappointed.
By the time the two of you arrived at the BAU, the rest of the team was already gathered in the bullpen, their eyes immediately locking onto you and Hotch as you walked in together. You were still dressed in your dinner attire, and Hotch, though composed, looked far more relaxed than he usually did when coming into the office. It didnât take a genius to figure out what was going on.
Morgan, always quick to jump on any chance for teasing, grinned widely the moment you entered. âWell, well, well,â he said, leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed. âWhat have we here?â
Garcia, who had been standing by her computer, gasped dramatically. âNo way! You two were on a date?!â she exclaimed, her eyes darting between you and Hotch like sheâd just uncovered the juiciest gossip.
Reid, looking slightly bewildered but intrigued, glanced at Hotch. âReally?â
You, completely unbothered by the attention, flashed a smile as you walked over to the table, pulling your jacket off and tossing it over a chair. âSurprised? I thought you all were more observant than that.â
Morgan laughed, clearly enjoying the moment. âWe had our suspicions. But I gotta say, seeing Hotch in date mode? Didnât think it was possible.â
Emily, who had been watching with a sly smile, leaned in. âHowâs he doing? All proper and stiff like usual?â
You grinned at Hotch, who was standing behind you, his expression calm but not quite unreadable. âOh, heâs very proper,â you said, your voice laced with playful sarcasm. âHe even picked me up. Very chivalrous.â
The team burst into laughter at that, and even Hotch, though stoic, didnât seem fazed by the teasing. If anything, there was a trace of amusement in his eyes as he stood there, clearly aware that he was the center of the joke.
Garcia leaned forward, her eyes widening with curiosity. âWait, hold on. Hotch on a date? This is... rare,â she said, her tone full of intrigue but tempered with playful restraint. âI mean, Iâve heard of such things, but to witness itâwow.â
Hotch shook his head slightly, though the corner of his mouth tugged upward. âItâs not as monumental as youâre making it sound,â he said with a small, almost sheepish smile, something barely noticeable but present.
You laughed, leaning against the table. âSorry, Hotch. I think youâre stuck with this one for a while.â
Morgan grinned, nodding in agreement. âYeah, I donât think sheâs going to let you off the hook that easily. But Iâve got to say,â he added, glancing between you and Hotch, âI havenât seen the man this... relaxed in a long time.â
Garcia smiled softly, her usual energy settling into something more genuine. âIt suits you, Hotch,â she said with a wink, but there was warmth in her words, not just her usual excitement.
You shot Hotch a quick look, a playful grin tugging at your lips. âSee? I told you I was good at getting under peopleâs skin.â
Hotch gave you a sideways glance, but the hint of a smile on his face didnât go unnoticed by the rest of the team. âSo Iâve noticed.â
Despite the teasing, the team eventually settled into their professional rhythm, focusing on the case at hand. Hotch shifted back into his role as Unit Chief seamlesslyâhis tone authoritative, his posture all business. But even as he directed the team, catching glimpses of you across the room, there was something new in the air between you, something that didnât quite fit within the professional boundaries youâd both carefully maintained up until now.
Every now and then, youâd catch him glancing your way, his expression softening for just a moment before he returned to the task at hand. It didnât go unnoticed by you. In fact, you could feel itâthe subtle pull between you two, something the team had picked up on too.
You werenât embarrassed about how the night had unfolded. Not even a little. Youâd owned your feelings, and seeing Hotch standing there, the team playfully ribbing you both, only made you more certain of what was between you. If anything, it was fun. It felt natural. But as the case wore on and the work consumed everyone, the playful teasing fell away, leaving just you and Hotch standing side by side, reviewing files as you discussed the finer points of the profile.
At some point, Hotchâs shoulder brushed against yours, and it sent a spark through youâsmall but undeniable. The room was buzzing with the usual energy of the BAU at work, but between you and Hotch, there was a quiet that felt intimate, even in the middle of the chaos.
âYou okay with how that all played out?â you asked quietly, keeping your voice low enough that only he could hear.
Hotchâs eyes met yours, his expression unreadable for a brief moment before he nodded. âItâs fine.â
You hesitated, sensing there was more beneath his calm exterior. Leaning in just a little, you lowered your voice even more, pushing a little, like you always did with him. âYou sure? Youâre not embarrassed?â
Hotch turned to face you more fully, his dark eyes steady as they met yours again. âNot at all,â he said, his voice soft but sure.
You studied him for a second, feeling that familiar spark of curiosity. âI can be a lot sometimes,â you admitted, your tone lighter now but with a genuine edge. âI know I get under your skin. And Iâve noticed you try to keep things professional, but... am I too much for you?â
His brow furrowed slightly as if the thought hadnât even crossed his mind. He stepped just a fraction closer, his tone serious but gentle. âYouâre not too much,â he said quietly, his eyes searching yours. âItâs not that. Iâm just... not used to it.â
You raised an eyebrow, feeling a little bold. âNot used to what? Someone poking at your stoic FBI boss exterior?â
He let out a low chuckle, the sound almost surprising. âThat, yes. But itâs more than that,â he said, his gaze softening as he spoke. âIâm not used to someone like you. Confident, brazen, and... beautiful.â
Your heart skipped a beat at his words. Coming from Aaron Hotchner, they felt weightier than any compliment youâd ever received before. âYou really think Iâm all that?â you teased, though your voice was softer now, the playfulness balanced by something more vulnerable.
Hotch gave you a small smile, the kind that was so rare for him but meant so much. âI do.â
For a moment, you didnât speak. You just stood there, his words hanging between you, the tension both professional and personal at once. Youâd been used to teasing him, pushing his buttons, testing the boundaries. But this? This was different. This was real.
âGood,â you said finally, a smirk tugging at your lips as you regained your playful tone. âBecause I plan on teasing you about this for weeks.â
Hotch shook his head, amused. âI wouldnât expect anything less.â
You were about to respond when Morgan walked past, flashing a grin. âAre you two done having your little moment? Weâve got a case to solve.â
Hotch straightened, his professional demeanor snapping back into place, though you could still see the warmth in his eyes when he glanced at you. âLetâs get back to work.â
But even as you returned to the task at hand, there was no mistaking that something had shifted between you. The teasing, the banter, the sparks youâd been playing with for weeksâall of it had led to this. And you knew, even as you both focused on the case, that the connection between you wasnât something that would just go away.
As the night stretched on, you worked side by side, the teasing and laughter from earlier fading into the background. But every now and then, when the room was quieter and the rest of the team was occupied, Hotch would glance at you again, and in those moments, you saw itâthe acknowledgment of what was growing between you.
This wasnât just another playful exchange, another round of banter. This was real. And as much as Hotch was still the consummate professional, always in control, you could tell he wasnât uncomfortable or embarrassed. Not by you, not by what was happening. He was simply adjusting, learning how to navigate something new.
When the case was finally wrapped up, and everyone began to head home, you found yourself standing in the BAUâs dimly lit office with Hotch once again. The others had gone, leaving just the two of you alone in the quiet.
âWell,â you said, folding your arms with a grin, âwe never got to finish that date.â
Hotch, still composed, gave you a small smile. âIâll make it up to you.â
You tilted your head, teasing. âYou better. I donât usually let guys off the hook that easily.â
He chuckled softly, the sound making your heart skip again. âIâm not letting myself off the hook.â
You took a step closer, your voice lowering just slightly. âGood. Because I donât plan on letting you go that easy either.â
For a moment, neither of you spoke, the weight of the night hanging in the air. And then, in a gesture that felt natural, Hotch reached out, his hand brushing yours before gently intertwining his fingers with yours.
âIâll pick you up again tomorrow,â he said quietly, his eyes warm.
You smiled, giving his hand a light squeeze.âOld-fashioned, I remember.â
He smiled back, his tone soft but full of promise. âI think itâs growing on you.â
And with that, you both turned to leave, the knowledge that thisâwhatever it wasâwas just beginning.
Tag List:
@zaddyhotch @estragos @todorokishoe24 @khxna @rousethemouse
#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x you#aaron hotchner x y/n#aaron hotchner x female reader#aaron hotchner fanfiction#kiwriteswords#criminal minds#criminal minds fanfiction#hotch x reader
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Yours To Devour || R. Sukuna
âĄHeian Era true form sukuna x female reader
âĄone-shot
⥠Sukuna grapples with his growing obsession for the one mortal who sleeps peacefully in his presence, forcing him to confront an intimacy that both disgusts and entraps him.
⥠Tags: possessive Sukuna, soft sukuna (reluctant he hates it),watching you sleep, protective Sukuna,
⥠Genre/warnings : Mild possessiveness, obsessive thoughts, teennyyyy dark themes, small manipulation not really tho
Note: I wanted a sukuna that want to pretend he don't love you ....but he does
w.c: 1.1 K
The night stretched long and still, an endless canvas of shadow in which Sukuna sat, motionless, watching you sleep. The world beyond this room meant nothing to him in that moment, his kingdom reduced to the fragile form curled beside him, breathing so softly, so trustingly. It irritated himâno, more than thatâit unnerved him. How could someone so powerless, so inconsequential, hold such sway over his thoughts?
You didnât know it, couldnât know it, but you had woven yourself into the very fabric of his being without so much as lifting a finger. It was absurd. He was Sukuna Ryomen, the King of Curses. His power knew no bounds, his cruelty no limits, and yet here he was, tethered to a mortal, incapable of tearing his eyes away from the steady rise and fall of your chest. He hated itâhated you for it. And yet⌠he couldnât stop.
Why does it have to be you of all?
The question lingered, gnawing at the edges of his mind. Why did you sleep so easily in his presence? Why did the terror that gripped the souls of all others at the mere sight of him seem to bypass you completely? There was a recklessness in your serenity, a vulnerability that mocked the very core of his existence. You should have feared him. You should have fled, as all the others had. But you stayed.
More than thatâyou rested.
Sukunaâs gaze swept over your face, soft and untroubled in sleep, lips slightly parted as though you were whispering secrets to the night. A low growl rumbled in his chest. You were aggravatingly adorable in the worst of ways, and he hated that about you.
This is beneath me.
All of this is beneath me.
He told himself that again and again, a mantra that rang hollow with every passing second. How had it come to this? When had he allowed himself to sink so low, to be ensnared by something as meaningless as your mortal fragility? He had killed for lessâdecimated entire populations without so much as a second thought. But you, in your softness, in your maddening stillness, were undoing him.
Sukuna shifted closer to you, his breath catching in his throat when you stirred ever so slightly, turning toward him, as if even in sleep, you sought the heat of his body. The urge to touch you, to trace the outline of your cheek with his fingers, clawed at him. He wanted to deny it, to push you away, to crush the intimacy growing between you like a weed he could not pull. But he didnât. He let himself drown in it.
You have no idea what youâve done to me, he thought, the words a silent curse, bitter and laden with a weight he couldnât shake. You had invaded his mind, his soul, in ways that made no sense. He, who had been untouchable, invincible, now found himself tangled in this absurd connection, like a moth drawn to the flame that would inevitably consume it.
But he wasnât the moth, was he? No, you were. You, with your mortal fragility and your trusting heart, would be the one to burn.
Still, his hands betrayed him. They moved without his permission, his upper arms sliding under the blanket to pull you into his chest, while his lower hands hovered, uncertain, before covering your smaller form with their warmth. His grip tightenedâpossessive, instinctiveâas if keeping you close was the only way to keep himself together. And it disgusted him. You disgusted him. And yet, the disgust was tempered by something darker, something more intimate.
Do you even know how much power you have over me?
He felt his chest rise and fall in time with yours, an unintentional rhythm that brought him no peace, only frustration. He had spent centuries mastering control over everythingâhis domain, his power, the very fabric of reality itself bent to his will. But you? You had slipped past his defenses without even trying, weaving yourself into his every thought, his every breath.
It was infuriating. It was intoxicating.
He lowered his gaze to your lips, slightly parted in sleep, the soft puff of your breath brushing against his skin. He could feel itâhis need to touch you, to claim you, warping the edges of his sanity. The intimacy of it all, the way you had trusted him, was unbearable. And yet, here he was, allowing you into the space no one else had ever dared to enter.
Why do you make me weak? The thought echoed in his mind, bitter and raw. He could end this now, crush you in his embrace, sever this unwanted bond with a single thought. And yet⌠the idea of your absence unsettled him in a way that nothing ever had before.
âFoolish girl,â he muttered under his breath, his voice barely a whisper in the dark. His lips curled into a sneer, but it was laced with something softer, something closer to tenderness than he would ever admit. You have no idea how dangerous this is, do you? No idea how close you were to being devoured, consumed by the very thing that now held you so carefully, so possessively.
But there was no terror in you, no fear, as you pressed closer to him in sleep. Only a serene acceptance that made his chest tighten in ways he didnât understand. The idea of letting go seemed⌠impossible now. The King of Curses did not care for anything or anyoneâbut the thought of you slipping from his grasp was unbearable. It was absurd.
Iâll kill you and anyone else before I let such a thing happen.
His arms tightened around you, holding you closer, his body wrapping around yours with a desperate sort of finality. He was no fool. This was a weakness, plain and simple. But it was his weakness. You were his.
And so, as the night deepened, Sukuna rested, his head falling against yours as he allowed himself this brief surrender to the intimacy he would never acknowledge in the daylight. The world could crumble, kingdoms could fall, but for nowâjust for nowâhe would keep you here.
Close.
And he would never let you go.
Manz doesn't know what to do with himself ...but that's okay ..cuz you there
#suiwritesđ#sukuna x reader#sukuna ryoumen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#ryomen sukuna x reader#jjk fluff#sukuna x you#jujutsu kaisen fluff#sukuna x y/n#sukuna ryomen x reader#sukuna ryomen x you#ryomen sukuna x you#jjk x reader#jjk x you#sukuna fluff#ryomen x reader#ryomen sukuna#jjk ryomen#jujutsu kaisen ryomen#sukuna ryomen#sukuna imagine#sukuna#jjk x y/n#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujutsu kaisen
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all to myself
CEO!BUCKY BARNES X READER
summary: after bucky finds out why you've been acting up ever since his company's party, he teaches you a lesson and remind you that you're the only one for him
warnings:Â 18+ minors dni, smut, f!reader, soft!mean!bucky, slight bratty!reader, jealousy on reader's side, possessiveness, teasing, begging, oral (f receiving), fingering, basically fighting then making up
wc: 1.9k
âDonât leave when Iâm talking to you.â
Buckyâs words should have sent shivers down your spineâshould have made you stop dead in your tracks. But you were so angry that you just dismissed him and walked away.
He called out your name, in warning this time, and you chose to ignore him once again.
It only took him three steps to catch up to you. He grabbed one of your wrists and spun you around in seconds.Â
âDid you not hear what I said? Donât leave when Iâm talking to you,â he fumed.Â
âYouâre not the boss of me,â you countered, trying to pull your arm from his grasp. But he was too strong.
âWhatâs up with you? Youâve been acting like this all night.â
Your boyfriendâs company had just hit the next milestone and of course, it was only appropriate to celebrate. But ever since the two of you left the party, youâve been giving him the silent treatment.
You made sure you were always steps ahead of him when walking out the building. You ignored the farewells and even went as far as slamming the door to his three-million dollar Bugatti that he loves so much without even a second thought. You refused to look at him the whole ride home and when he tried to talk to you, you completely ignored him, focusing on the street lamps instead.
Once the two of you got back to his place, he started confronting you on your poor behaviour and all that other bullshit. As if he wasnât the one to cause it.Â
âI have no idea what youâre talking about. If youâre done, Iâm going to go to bed. Goodnight,â you said bitterly, finally yanking your arm away.Â
âWhy are you being so fucking difficult?â
You scoffed. âOh, Iâm sorry for being difficult,â you said, voice laced with sarcasm. âMaybe you should go be with those ladies you were talking to the whole night. Maybe they arenât so fucking difficult.â
He furrowed his eyebrows at you. âIs that what this is all about? Youâre jealous I was talking to other girls?â
You bit down hard on your lip. âYou were flirting with them!âÂ
âI was not flirting with them.â
You rolled your eyes. âYeah, because letting them touch and throw themselves at you is not flirting.â
Because while Bucky was enjoying himself, you were left to socialize with his stuck-up business partners and had to down your cocktails all by yourself. You got ignored by your own fucking boyfriend. To make matters worse, the two of you havenât seen each other for a whole week because he was on a business trip. You even wore his favourite dress and did your hair and makeup all pretty for him but he didnât even pay any attention to you.Â
So excuse you for being emotional, but you think your anger is justifiable.
He sighed. âYouâre overthinking it.â
âWhatever,â you muttered, âIâm going to bed.âÂ
âWeâre not done here,â he demanded.Â
âMmm, I think we are.âÂ
He pulled you back, this time with so much force that youâre practically pressed up against his chest.Â
âYou were embarrassing me in front of all my friends, you know that?âÂ
You scoffed. âIf thatâs your only concern maybe we shouldnât do this anymore,â you spat.
His eyes darken, âSay that again.â
You swallowed your breath and could feel yourself heating up at his words. And you didnât know where all this bravery was coming from because a minute later, you said, âBreak up with me then. Go find one of those girls from tonight and fuck them instead. Iâm sure they wonât embarrass you.â
He tightened his grip when you tried to writhe out of his hold.Â
âStop fighting me,â he said.Â
Godâyou were even more angry now. Because heâs so sexy when heâs boring his deep eyes into yours in that authoritative and dominating way of his. It was unfair.Â
âYouâre not leaving,â he continued, âyouâre not stepping a foot outside this room unless I say so.â
That intense warmth building between your legs was getting worse and worse by the minute.
âWhat are you going to do to stop me?â you mocked, knowing it would irritate him to endless lengths. You lifted your hand towards your neck, where the diamond studded necklace Bucky gave you when he officially asked you to become his was delicately located.
His jaw ticked and you ripped the necklace off.Â
Before you had a chance to think about what youâve done, he grabbed you and smashed his lips against yours, knocking all the air out of your lungs.
You whimpered at the force but slowly, you melted into him as his hands made its way to cup your face.
He moaned into your mouth and for a second you forgot why you were angry in the first place.
Fuck Bucky Barnes and his plush lips.
âYouâre such a brat, you know that?â He growled into your ear before pushing you against the wall and caging you in between him. Your knees almost buckled at the huskiness of his voice.
He trailed his hand down to your thighs before dipping it into your dress, hiking it up slightly. He smirked. âLook at you,â he taunted, âso wet.â
Your breath hitched as his finger made its way to your panties, rubbing gentle circles on the now damp fabric. He hooked his finger along its band and ripped the lace offâlike how he ripped all your other ones.Â
âBâBucky!â you gasped as he cupped your mound, finger brushing your clit and teasing you at your entrance.
His lips latched onto your neck, sucking and biting the sensitive skin.
You leaned into him. âBucky,â you whined while rocking against his hand.
âSo needy,â he teased.Â
âBucky,â you desperately begged, ââplease.â
âPlease what, baby? Use your words.â
âWant⌠need to feel you,â you murmured.
âMmm, I donât think you deserve it,â he said.Â
âFuckââ you gasped as he pressed his palm harder against your sensitive sex. âPlease, Bucky,â you begged, âI didnât mean to be bratty. Just wanted all your attention, that's all.â
He hummed. âMy girl that desperate for me?â
You nodded. âYâyes,â you stammered. âWant you all to myself.â
At that, he plunged two of his fingers into your wet core. You gasped at the fullnessâat how good it felt.
âLook at you,â he whispered, pumping his fingers in and out. âA mess for me. What happened to all that defiance? Hm?â
You couldnât even say any snarky remarks back. The only noise coming out of your mouth were your pathetic whimpers and desperate pleas as Bucky fucked you knuckles deep.
âYou want to come, sweetheart?âÂ
You nodded, gripping onto his shoulders. âI want to hear you say sorry.â
âIâm sorâah!â you gasped when he curled his finger at that spot he knows so well. âIâm sorry. Iâm sorry for acting like that tonight.â
âAnd?â
âAnd for slamming the door to your car.â
âNo, not that. I donât care about the car.âÂ
His hand clasped around your neck, giving it a gentle squeeze.Â
âIâm sorry for ripping your necklace off. Iâm so sorry,â you cried. You leaned into him, just below his ears. âIâm yours, Bucky. Only yours.âÂ
âGood girl,â he rasped.Â
And at that, you come crashing down, an eutrophic wave washing over you.Â
He held you as you collected yourself. âIâm sorry for embarrassing you tonight,â you murmured into his shoulder. âItâs just I really did miss you. I even wore that dress you liked so much. Put on your favourite shade of lipstick.â
âI know, sweetheart,â he said, stroking your hair. âYou looked beautiful tonight.â
You burrowed yourself deeper into him. âThought you got bored of me or something,â you mumbled more to yourself than him, but he managed to pick it up and he took it to heart.
âDonât ever say that again,â he said angrily. He pulled you away and held your face. âI will never get bored of you. Youâre the only one I want, you got it?âÂ
You pouted as if you didnât quite believe him and if there was one thing Bucky couldnât handle, it was those sad doe-eyes of yours underneath your pretty lashes.Â
His mouth latched onto yours once again, deepening the kiss within seconds. He led you to the couch, never once breaking the kiss.Â
You fell onto the black leather as he hovered above you. âWhat do you want me to do to prove it to you? You want me to kneel? Because Iâll go on my fucking knees for you,â he said, before lowering himself in front of you. And that was enough for you to come undone for the second time tonight.
He grabbed your legs, carefully stroking it before littering kisses all over your calves and thighs. You took a deep breath when he rolled up your dress again, exposing your stomach and cunt. Then he was in between your legs in seconds.
âWaitââ you panted. âBucky,â you said, tugging onto his hair. âThe windows.âÂ
The blinds to the floor-to-ceiling glass windows of his New York City penthouse were still open.
âFuck the windows. Let the world see. Thatâs what you wanted right? Me on my knees for you,â he said, licking a stripe up your folds. âLet everyone know youâre the only person I would go on my knees for.â
You clenched at his words which caused Bucky to chuckle, his hot breaths hitting your already overheated core.Â
The flickering of his tongue combined with the sucking was too much. He was going down on you like a starved man and you pulled on his hair harder when his tongue hit that spot that made you see stars.
âStop moving,â he grunted, gripping your legs even tighter. âYou taste so damn sweet.â
You were trembling by now and he brought one of his hands to your chest to stabilize your bodyâgrabbing and kneading the flesh while he was at it.
Everytime his nose rubbed at your clit, you could feel your orgasm come closer and closer. And when you finally release, Bucky made sure to clean you up with his tongue, not letting a single drop of you go to waste. When he came up, the scruff on his jaw was wet with your arousal.Â
âFuck,â you breathed out, trying to come down from both your high and at the sight of him.
âI love you,â he murmured.Â
At that moment, you realized one thing. The entirety of New York might want a piece of himâthe handsome self-made CEO whose eyes were enough to bring both women and men to their kneesâbut the only person heâll ever go on his knees for was you. Youâre the one he comes home to. He was yours. Completely, wholly, yours.
Before you got a chance to repeat those words back to him, he picked you up and threw you over his shoulders.
âAh!â you squealed, âBucky! What are you doing!â
He gave you a smack on the ass before carrying you towards the bedroom. âWeâre not done here,â he said. âIâll give you all the attention you want, baby. We have all night.â
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes oneshot#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes imagine#bucky fic#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky fanfic#sebastian stan x reader
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141 x POC!GN Intelligence Operative - The Beginning of the End (Long Drabble) Author's Notes: I got so many thoughts on this so bear with me. I didn't have the brain power to write this as a full fic so accept the various drabbles that will come out of this concept. Also If anyone has done this before, please let me know! I would love to read that! Warnings: MDNI, Sexual Themes, Slight Violence, Angst
You're currently on a probationary period to be the permanent Intelligence Operative for Task Force 141. Despite being trained and recommended by Kate Laswell herself, Laswell found a hard time finding a team that would treat you with the level of respect you were warranted as many saw you as a glorified assistant.
Frustrated by the blatant disrespect, Laswell calls Price, despite knowing that he doesn't like to work with strangers. After singing your praises and promising him that he would not be disappointed, Price concedes and decides to give you a chance. If after a year you managed to prove your worth, you would earn yourself a permanent position on his team.
But by the 3-month mark, Price and the rest of the team knew you were here to stay. They honestly couldn't believe that no one wanted to work with you. You were exactly everything that Laswell promised... heck, even more if you asked any of the 141.
You were always on top of your work as well as the boys', even jumping in when it got too much. Your attention to detail was impeccable as you managed to save the team both time and resources from faulty intel or bad leads. But, what really cemented your place on the team was the way you managed to worm yourself in each of their hearts.Â
Before Soap even had a chance to pursue you, you sought him out first. Whenever you had a problem, instead of calling the Captain, or the Lieutenant, or even the older Sergeant, you always called him first, the Sergeant that still feels like he has a lot to prove. And when Johnny asks why, you say that he's already proven himself, which makes his heart soar. So of course, the Scotsman thinks of you when he's thinking of strategies to suggest or jokes to pull out during the next meeting.Â
And when Kyle asked for your attention, you gave it without hesitation. While everyone else on base focuses on Soap's jokes, Price's wisdom, or Ghost's commands, you eagerly wait for Gaz' input, conscious of what it feels like to be talking while no one listens. You are enamored by everything he has to say, giving him your utmost attention, a rare thing for the Sergeant. Even when he pushes back on orders, you're the first one to listen and ask the rest of the team to just consider. So of course, Kyle looks for you whenever his mind begins to race.
And when Price falters, you're there to pick him up, never with an ounce of judgement. You're the first in his office, with a coffee or snack in hand (since you know he's probably forgotten to eat), and the last to leave it, putting as much time and heart in strategizing as he does. You remind him that he deserves to rest as much as his boys and that you'll never see him as less when his Captain persona cracks. So of course, when John finally has a chance to unwind, he thinks of you and your warm smile.
And finally, when Ghost tries to intimidate you, you stand your ground. You were aware of his reputation, but it didn't really phase you. He wasn't the first person that's tried to unnerve you. But instead of scaring you off, you managed to intimidate him after he catches you chewing out two rookies for bad-mouthing him. When he confronts you and asks why the passionate defense, you just shrug, reasoning that that's what teammates do. He has your back and you have his. So of course, Ghost becomes your shadow, jumping for the chance to protect you.
That's why when you're all at a bar, celebrating your 4 months with the team, the guys are loving by the fact that you drank more than usual. You've become much more bold in your affection for each of them. And they won't lie and say that they didn't like the heavy-handed compliments or even the intimate touches. However, it's when you start talking about a future with them that their patience nearly snaps.
"You know I'd gladly marry any of you." You admit as you finish your 7th beer. With your laughter in the background, they all still as they imagine what that would be like. Dressing up and waiting for you at the altar, his breath held in anticipation for you to bless the place and his life with your presence. Going to your now-shared home and taking you over, and over, and over, and over again until your body is leaking with his spent. Willingly giving you his mind, body, and soul for as long as the world allows him as a sign of gratitude for choosing him when you could have picked anyone else. They all stare at you as they all realize how badly they wanted to snatch you up and make this a reality.
You're so drunk, you fail to notice your teammates' hungry stares. But, they don't. Jealousy seeps in their bones as they realize that their captain, their lieutenant, their sergeant, and their fellow sergeant were all thinking the same thing.
So obviously, infighting starts. They still manage to get their work done but now it's a competition to see who can earn your praise. Now, the Captain's orders become suggestions. The Lieutenant's bark is just that. The sergeants' playful snips turn into snarls. The growing need to put the other in their place festers in each and every one of them. It's not great, but it's manageable... until it's not.
While Price and Ghost are arguing over the plans for the next mission, they get called into the gym. On entrance, they find Soap and Kyle lunging at the other's throat. Price grabs Kyle and Ghost grabs Johnny, pulling the two SAS soldiers off from one another. The damage isn't serious, but it's there: Kyle's lip is torn and the corner of Soap's eyes is bleeding. It's clear they're not done yet as Kyle snarls at the Scotsman, telling him that you would never go for a fool like him. Soap retaliates and barks that you wouldn't go for a wimp like Gaz.
Realizing what's happening to his team, Price calls an emergency meeting in his office. With all men inside, the room is tense. No one speaks.
"We need to put a stop to this," admits Price with a heavy weight in his heart. As captain, he knows that for the sake of the task force, tough decisions have to be made. They were soldiers first before men. The men shrink under his gaze, realizing what has to be done.
"So from here on out, they're off limits. Whatever relationship you have with them, end it." Kyle and Soap open their mouths to argue, but Price quickly silences them.
"And if you can't control yourself, I'll have them transferred. Understood?" John felt his stomach lurch with his statement. He couldn't imagine kicking you off the team, but he had to push that feeling aside right now. If him and his men didn't get their shit together, innocent people would suffer.
"Yes sir," grunts out Ghost. He slowly makes his way to the door.
Soap nods his head, eyes sharp and jaw tense. He's right behind the Lieutenant.
Gaz waits a bit and stares Price down. "You sure about this?" he spits at his captain.
Returning the stare, Price stands firm on his decision. "Positive. It's what best for the team." Gaz just nods and walks out, slamming the door behind him.
You're not entirely sure what happened in that emergency meeting, but with the way the guys walked out of Price's office, you knew it wasn't good. Ghost walks past you, completely ignoring you. Soap looks at you but quickly turns his head when your eyes meet his. And Gaz shoots you a grimace, but doesn't say a word.
Despite not knowing what happened that day, you quickly feel its consequences.
Word Count: 1310
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#141 x reader#cod x poc!reader#cod fanfic#cod x reader#john price x reader#kyle gaz x reader#simon riley x reader#john mactavish x reader#cod angst#tf 141 x reader
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