#but this is tragic in a way i wasnt expecting and its got me so fucked up

[mythalism]

from @/elfbotanist on twitter who is posting from trick's bluesky; they elaborated a bit on exactly what the intention of the solavellan ending is

[cupoftaae]

9 with Yoongi please😍😍😍

"and why are you so jealous" x YOONGI

warnings- angst, swearing, drinking, references to hookups, yoongi is a fuck boyyyy

A/N- sorry for the late posting, I hope you enjoy sweetheart! <3

You sat outside the bar in the front seat of your car, eyeing the drunk people leaving as the clock read nearly 3am.

Yoongi, your roommate, had called you a bit prior, asking if you could so graciously drive his drunk ass back home. You agreed, well, because you are desperately in love with the fucker, even if he pissed you off.

the thing is, you didnt mind doing shit for him, but he was just an asshole most times. Yoongi wasnt the kind of guy who would date someone like you, he was out every weekend with his friends at some bar and probably hooking up with any girl within a 5 mile radius who'd let him.

You would let your hopes rise again anytime he did something for you, the expectations were on the floor, considering the action of him helping you clean the apartment would fluster you.

"okay, I gotta go baby"

you looked out the window, seeing yoongi walking towards your car with some drunk chick hanging off of him

"you'll call me right?" she whined, hands holding his shirt

"of course I will, first thing tomorrow" he grinned, helping her off to one of her friends.

You smirked because you knew his ass was not calling her back.

thats how yoongi was, thats the kind of person you fell for, and it wasnt this behavior that made you fall- it was all the way back to 8 months ago, when you and yoongi visited his mother in the hospital, youve never seen him so vulnerable, you held him in your arms as he cried about all of his fears.

It was tragic yet beautiful to see someone who puts on a front all the time, finally break.

You stayed against him like glue during that time, which ultimately resulted in an emotionally constipated hook up between you both.

Neither of you mentioned it ever again, especially when not too long after that he started going out on weekends again- forgetting you.

"sorry for making you pick me up...." he mumbled, crawling into the passenger seat.

"'s okay...I dont mind" you shrug, starting the car again

you felt his eyes on you, a small shiver going down your spine as you forced yourself to pay attention to the road.

"you have fun tonight?" you tried to speak, avoiding his glances.

"you look really pretty, why are you so dolled up?" he asked, voice soft

You were a bit taken back, yoongi never spoke about you like this, even in his drunk state.

"thank you..?...im not dolled up...im just wearing a shirt and jeans, I fell asleep in my work outfit."

he smiled, "oh...well its cute" his hand reached over to play with your hair a little, making you jump

"yoongi-"

"what?"

You took a breath and tried to just stay quiet until you pulled against the curb outside of the apartment, parking the car.

neither of you got out yet

"why are you still staring at me?" you mumbled, turning on the car light to grab your phone that had fallen beneath your seat.

He shrugged, "because I wanna kiss you" his voice slurred

You sat up quickly, head banging against the steering wheel "wh- fuck!"

His eyes widened "shit, you okay?" he reached a hand out

"im fine! dont...touch me" you managed to speak, turning the light off. "what makes you suddenly want to kiss me, yoongi?"

"i dont know you look cute, its not a big fucking deal" he chuckled, eyes still trailing your body

You waited a moment to gather your thoughts, "actually it is, because you say that to every girl you meet, you told that girl you'd call her and I know you wont. You cant keep treating young girls like this, yoongi. Its wrong, we get attached easily and we dont appreciate being led on."

He smirked, "okay...and why are you so jealous?"

You choked "jealous??"

"yeah, jealous"

"im not fucking jealous, yoongi, im mad that you think this is okay behavior."

"and if there were no other girls you wouldnt have reacted the way you just did- in face, I bet you would kiss me in a heartbeat." he spoke

"youre a dick, you know that?"

he nods, smirking

"proud of that?"

"meh" he shrugged

You bit the inside of your cheek and felt a wave of emotion come over you. You realized that he will never change, hes not yours and probably never will be, and you are wasting your time waiting for the yoongi from 8 months ago to come back.

"go fuck yourself" you got out and slammed the car door, leaving him behind.

His eyes sadly watched you walk away, he mentally cursed himself for fucking up again.

He knew he would never have you, and he was to blame.

[ganondoodle]

fuck it, elden ring DLC rant (spoilers) (long post ... oh dear)

so, to start this- this is a very emotional reaction, so take everything with a ton of salT (i need to get this out of my system bc i need to go and do stuff today, i literally couldnt get much more than 3 hours of sleep bc my mind was racing) i only know two screenshots and what others have told me (thank you) so i might be missing more context and havent seen or read it myself

(more details and spoilers for the DLC below the read more thingy)

also, just to explain a bit, i dont usually get this upset about things i like, i like alot of things, but its RARE as fuck that i care, like actually care care about something, and that just kinda happens, i dont choose it or can decide to not care, i just do, and when something like this happens its like ... a sort of grief? i cant help but care about it but it messes with me emotionally, i have no control over it and cant change anything about it when it gets bad or done dirty, leavign me to just have to watch it be real even when i dont want to accept it-- i wouldnt say so much that i 'expect' somethign specific and cant handle when its not like that (common accusation about disliking totk)- and no i dont have somethign specific in mind, i just dont want it to be bad OR things that seem done and closed off suddendly out of nowhere be revealed to 'actually' have been like this, new stuff that either makes no sense or invalidates alot about what i valued about it, what i thought was the point

(i remember two .. my only two other intersts before- see what i mean RARE- that also went down simiarly like this; transformers (bay movies and mainly prime series, listen i didnt choose it either) with each movie it got more messy and stupid, primes second(?) season had an end i hated and the following movie was the final nail in the coffin- and one piece after that, which i slowly fell out of love with bc every chapter seemed to go more into a direction i didnt like, then the reveal that luffy is a god actually was my final ok i hate that moment)

i knew demise for a long time but wasnt obsessed about him at all, it took me learning about how hylia was depicted in a non canon (?) manga (which made me annoyed me bc i didnt like it and made a design for her to counter demises instead) and then reading his few lines of dialog about her again that it suddendly HIT me, like cupids arrow into my head-- i liked but wasnt that super interested into elden ring until radahn showed up, instantly his design made me go owo and then learning his (base game) lore it HIT me (i love sort of tragic side characters that might have been powerful or heroic at some point but now arent anymore- not saying he is that elden rings lore i messy and no ones good tm- and especially so if that character is widely hated for no good reason, dismissed or forgotten, has little lore etc)

i have things i like but dont care this much about, like okami or bloodborne, i like it alot, theres characters i really like (oki) but im not like, fixated on them?- and to have two at the same time, while not equally strong, i dont think i had before, and then have both be damaged or potentially lose it in a similar way within barely a year hurts so damn much--- anyway, getting into the actual rant now lol

so, to sum things up (that i know), in the elden ring DLC later on

miquella is actually a master manipulator and brainwasher (even to his sister???? which means alot of impactful things about his relationship to people is kinda invalidated or made meaningless, shitty)

he wanted to become a god by marrying radahn (his half? brother, same father) of all people that has never been mentioned before until now somehow?? ) you can argue it was hinted to but i find it completely out of left field

miquella sent malenia after radahn to kill him so he could be put into the realm of shadow so miquella could marry him (there were better candidates for that??)- its unclear (to me) if radahn ever actually accepted when sound of mind or even knew about it at all, but failed and he was isntead inflicted with rot to slowly waste away but not die (like he is in base game)

which also means that, what i found really impactful in base game, the festival of radahn, that i thought was a tragic sort of last wish/effort for of radahn to grant him an honorable death as a respected general after being made into mindless people eating zombie, organized by his soldiers/friends- might have been just yet another attempt to kill him and get him over there to miquella (and even if not, it still makes it way less impactful and now i feel like letting him continue to roam as a zombie is more of a favor than killing him bc hes just gonna a puppet again! which turns the whole tradgedy of the stuff in base game on its head imo)

you need to kill him to get into the DLC (and i was even sus of that but shrugged it off when i heard it ..) bc that way miquella could take whatever was left of his soul and stitch it into mohgs corpse?? (which is why hes so small in that DLC fight) bc his body was rotten by that point, which also allowed miquella to control radahn and make him agree, force him to do whatever miq wanted (which ALSO might mean mohg 'kidnapping' miquella wasnt that actually but mohg too was manipulated so oud kill him and make his remains usable)

radahn in DLC is a voiceless meat puppet essentially ... like a mindless rotting zombie eating friends and fow alike wasnt enough- also means that we never ACTUALLY GET OT KNOW RADAHN HIMSELF bc hes eithe a zombie or a literal puppet (if you are gonna do him dirty at least let us meet actual real him *cries*)

his fight is super hard apparently (though i have been hearing people complain about the entire DLC being too hard, while the -casual player- streamer i watched is beating main bosses so fast they dont even get to start their second phase) when his fight in base game, and him by extentsion, was also hated bc of that ALREADY, which means more people are gonna hate his guts (he doesnt deserve that!!) AND most people probably wont get or care that its not actually HIM him so its like a repeat boss that everyone hates

it feels weirldy forced in for it to be radahn (like miquella was already said to be one of the strongest gods out there .. why hed want radahn so badly when his goal seemed to be rather .. combat less?? if you get what i mean, and radahn also rejected him??? and the tarnished is right there too????) bc theres plenty others it would have worked with that are barely used- it feels like someone jsut wanting him to be tha main guy not matter what (when he worked so much better as a side character!!!!)

a tragic but well rounded off side character (imo) was made into the main guy this is all about actually tm (i generally dont like main guys and this jsut feels so .... it just hurts, it didnt feel foreshadowed at all, and its not even truly HIM that is reveal to be a creepy asshat but hes just manipulated and controlled with the whole time, be it by rot or miquella)

and for miquella its like, no theres no even mildly good people there, hes brainwashed and manipulated everyone actually tm, a giant plan all to force his half brother into marrying him by making him into a corpse puppet bc he rejected miquella- inlcuding potentially manipulating his own twin sister, which goes agaisnt what you learn of what hes done for her in the base game i think?? (not that much into that part but yeah ... it feels unfair to her too)

it also kinda just leaves other lore from the base game in the dust? like the whole haligtree plan, how miquella cared for the rejected (i guess he didnt then??? and it was just more manipulation tm??) that castle with the eclipse stuff

(is the gloom eyes queen, marika, and or st trina even .. important at all to any of this??)

ok from reading tweets from people talkign about it, miquella says radahn agreed apparently but whether thats true remains uncertain and given the circumstances i do not think radahn did- others said that it kinda sounds he agreed to something that he didnt think would involve him marrying miquella

everything feels like its in shambles for every fan of every involved chaarcter

yes i know you can argue that it was all planned from the start and meant to be a twist and everything and that people having a different idea of characters isnt the fault of the creators .... only to some degree bc why then build up make so much lore and story about stuff that turns out to be like saying 'actually it was all a lie' like its not valid to feel betrayed then, you can plan things out all you want but that doesnt mean it cant be bad oder underwhelming

(i wished to be able to meet or know more about radahn but like in a non rot way or like past flashback whatever kind of way and then not like this anyway, like i was interested into his relationship with jerren and just .. more about him i suppose the monkey paw has curled hasnt it -or however you say that-)

and there i was like two days ago going "omg radahn mention!!!" when that one .. feyja? NPC says she fought alongside him at some point ............................................................

leonard isnt there in the DLC to my knowledge, you know it cant be truly radahn if his horse isnt there (the sole reason he learned gravitiy magic for and it stayed with him even after the rot!!! i know people have started to hate it bc people love that but i love that, it made him so endearing to me, like a character i already found cool omg has a confirmed softer spot??? in MY fromsoftware title??)

sorry for the long post of rambling, i am a mess, barely slept 3 hours, yes i am weird to care, autisms or whatever .. i need to go somewhere in an hour and havent prepared as all bc i needed my thoughts out of my head- might have forgotten stuff, idk if i will add it later or just kinda .. stew in it for a while

(and yes a big point why i feel so strongly is both bc its just gonna make more people hate him even more AND feels so invalidating of alot of other stuff- pulls other characters down with it- the entire time i was watching the streams i and trailers i thought i was like, its onw thing, with miquellas littel adventure and more background info on marika mostly on its own from the base game BUT NO I GUESS)

(read all this in the sense of an utteraly disoriented confused and drunken seagull yelling around pls i am not in serious mental distress ..)

[tirasamu]

Whomst from KNY made it to the list?

im so full of love for this show flamey :( i ran to shonen jump immediately and read the manga too !!!! under the cut bc manga spoilers !!

MY NO. 1 IS GIYUU 🤍🤍 my darling boy i knew he’d be the one as soon as i saw him and the further along i got the more i adored him, i just want to cradle him in my hands so gently. ive needed to love on him ever since the “im…not disliked by people” scene but then the story behind his haori just solidified it T^T his heart is SO big i want to spoil him w kisses. THESE PANELS my god !!!! im so happy he got at least somewhat of a happy ending :( he deserves the entire world and more

mitsuri !! i love when they let badass girls still be ultra girly !! the way she moved like a magical girl during fights !! besides her being the biggest cutie pie ever her and obanai absolutely destroyed me :< i wasnt ready to see them both die in each other’s arms like that. ive always been so weak for the ‘in another life’ trope but ive never thought of it in this kind of way where ur both dying and promising u’ll be together if ur given another chance. i feel like after everything else that panel was the one that finally broke my heart into a million pieces

douma because of course that little freak is here, i LOVE him !! i just wanted more of him :< i want to sit in his lap and kiss him all over and maybe clean up his eyebrows a little bit….another one in my long list of evil men who i like to imagine would only be soft for me :< i fear i would join his cult if given the opportunity but i like to think he’d say im too pretty to eat 🙂‍↕️ all that being said seeing shinobu get her revenge and kill him was so satisfying, i cant lie i was cheering !! i was giggling that even in purgatory he was still trying to flirt w somebody HFJDDJ he’s such a loser but thats my type !!!

and ofc i saved the best for last….muzan 🙂‍↕️ PHEW. u conditioned me from the start flamey i didnt stand a chance. he had no business being so fine and oh my gosh ?? the scene w daki ?? I HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO STOP THINKING AB IT SINCE I SAW IT he had me blushing into my laptop (づ៸៸៸◟) i wanted to jump thru the screen !! i love how bitchy and grumpy he is always, i want to bother him w affection in the same way i want to bother fyodor hehe >:) also his little runway walk down to ubuyashiki was so funny

but his character was probably the most interesting to me…by the end i felt rlly bad for him, hes tragic in a way i didnt expect him to be (was ab to type ‘ykwim?’ but ofc mrs kibutsuji herself knows !! 🙂‍↕️) i know it could come across like he just wanted to be invincible but the thought of him being so sick as a human, then he becomes a demon and still cant live life normally just tugged at me. and then his last line being ‘dont leave me here’ ughh the desperation !! it hurts my heart T^T

reading / watching this series while grieving made it hit so much harder than i think it would’ve otherwise for me….it meant so much that after every death a past loved one greeted them to bring them to the other side, no matter how many times it happened i just wanted to bawl my eyes out (ㅠ﹏ㅠ) its def something im going to be thinking ab for a long time and going back to over and over again

[narwhalandchill]

also finished the 4.7 AQ and like . well firstly rip to all the sinner theories where it was like could it be nibelung or someone else and all like that was a bit tragic but thats the nature of theories i suppose. i do think it makes sense that the bigger players arent just all going to be figures we Already know of but yea.

overall i think it was like. quite good but also kinda suffers from the way these quests just Have to be an annual thing especially with how short it was? i saw a comment being like this feels like it shouldve been the epilogue to caribert and i kinda agree . also as much as it is appreciated that we Do get some direct answers to big lore questions in the quest was kind of a exposition dump in that sense . fade to black w the abyss sib and dain duel was certainly a Choice 💀

caribert truly is a sweetheart man i didnt expect him to pop up but i feel so bad for him now. except for the loomzoning atossa thing i get that he had no choice on the matter but that was rough for ur girl 😭😭

iiiiiii dunno how to feel about the whole we forget all about the reunion anyway when traveler Remembering as a descender has been established as such a core thing like it kinda feels like a copout im ngl . guess we are just now . aware of information as players that the traveler is not privy to . considering im already more than a little wary towards the general concept of like. memory erasure slash irminsul stuff when it comes to genshins writing im definitely feeling conflicted w this . also applies to the loom of fate editing reality thing . like okay on some level yes it is cool to include such prevalent elements of like. uncertainty and unreliable narration but in worst case those concepts are also v easy for a careless writing team to just. run off w and end up w a convoluted mess so i rly rly hope that wont end up the case

anyway. so the sinners are the big deal this time around i suppose and like. not that i wasnt necessarily expecting surtalogi to indeed be khaenriahn but the confirmation is certainly here now. no particular feelings on this from me im afraid bc like. Highly unpopular lore thing from me but both khaenriah n hexenzirkel (the latter more so than former) are kinda these. big lore topics and entities that i logically Do know and acknowledge as the massive deals they are to the story. but they just arent sth i have so far gotten that invested in altho khaenriah i have somewhat warmed up to . hexenzirkel still feels too much like an unnecessary presence to me lmao i might be missing out on stuff but if the abyss order arguably has a lack of story presence issue then the witches have it like 5 times worse 💀 But point being surtalogi being part of this whole crew of transcendent beings from khaenriah that became sinners is like . okay then isiskskskdk its not that big a deal for me

i think the most meaningful implications from that (in terms of My personal lore fixations at least *cough*) just have to do w like . sth id already been thinking about even before we got the confirmation of the visionary as the sinner that clothar found (which was a big theory anyway that i did personally find very compelling and well its canon now). and that is just the way that like . when skirk compared surtalogi as one in pursuit of "perfection" and brought up the visionary and rhinedottir as two ppl akin to him. that and the narzissenkreuz note about primordial human essentially being the synonym for descenders . & how rhines magnum opus was the primordial human PROJECT aka in light of this note. Very likely to be an attempt at Creating a descender . and how the sinners and abyss orders loom of fate is obviously just another pathway into accessing some sorta will or way to rival the world and defy the heavenly principles . became this thing where i was like 90% convinced and now 100% convinced that if the "perfection" both gold and the visionary pursue is indeed a descenders will in one form or another . then surtalogis aims Must involve the same fucking thing

which naturally gets us back to the insane ajax theory territory bc . if what connects those 3 (and post 4.7 more like. All the transcendent sinners from khaenriah) is getting to that world rivaling will. Then it sure fucking makes Everything surtalogi is doing and planning w both the narwhal and ajax Very Interesting . like it sure is curious that These would be the things surtalogi is occupying himself with if its indeed a descender he seeks . so like . Yeah we dont need to get into 3rd descender stuff but one thing i sure do think is becoming less and less like crackpot speculation and more and more and explicitly foreshadowed future direction for childes arc is that. one way or another. he is going to be involved with the subject of becoming a descender . bc like. if gold tried creating one w alchemy. and if the visionary is Literally creating a loom of fate to serve as the machine capable of weaving a worlds worth of leylines and destiny aka just a descender equivalent machine . then it sure wouldnt make sense for surtalogi to be putting all this heavy effort and resources (as skirk commented on) towards acquiring and possibly subduing an interstellar voyager like the narwhal and getting his student to look for and train the weird kid with a possibly innate connection w it. Without that serving a role in His brand of descender equivalency that hes seeking as a sinner. So yeah childe long term relevance stocks are definitely up w this one guys Trust

but yea thats on surtalogi for me . Point being its not rly a New suspicion for me (like ever since primordial human project started sounding like DIY descender lab project i was thinking this) but i think its been absolutely further affirmed by directly linking surtalogi to the sinners of khaenriah that more likely than not seem like theyre All going to be ppl who used the abyss to seek the power of a descender in a variety of ways???? so thats very neat . wonder who the other 2 will turn out to be then .

another thing to do w the sinners is also like. the way that if we do count dainsleif among them just as one that Didnt jusr abandon the ppl during the cataclysm . there is obviously that doomed number of Six there . so like pygmy theories have been going wild already in the few days it took me to catch up w the AQ but im just kinda . i Still think pale princess is most likely to be about an irminsuled event and be about sth far further back into the timeline than khaenriah and the cataclysm . theres things like rhe night mother specifically talking abt Thousands of years passing before the new hero (= 4th descender aka us most likely) appears to challenge her and also just the general way i still think pale princess aligns too much w the story of the seelie ancestor and her lover Not to be a story about that time period . so as much as the 5+1 sinners of khaenriah being the pygmies is like. Yes the numbers would finally add up clearly with no mental backflips needed unlike w the archons . but like all things considered im still a bit unconvinced. we shall see . that book is a menace anyway so its always gonna be a hot topic lmao like what is Up with it 💀

[richardsphere]

Leverage Log: the Lonely Hearts Job

Well with a name like that, im expecting this to either be about con-artists cheating people on E-harmony, or a legitimately tragic story about love and/or loss...

---

Ok so Rich man arrives with armed goons (heck of a way to make a fist impression) and is crying within 2 minutes of the episode starting... I've said before that i want to see more of the marks' humanised so this promises to be an interesting episode. Nate: "There's no evidence of wrongdoing, She left you" Sophie (to nate): "thats harsh" Wellesley the fourth: "no it isnt".

This is a guy who knows how it looks, understand that it looks that way and acknowledges it openly. Its nice to see us go from last episode's overly naive Hurley to one of the more competent clients we've seen so far. "Whatever you want... its yours. Just find my wife".

I wonder whats going through Nate's mind in this moment. Here's a guy he's been scouting as a mark begging to be taken as a client...

Gut feeling: The second wife (the one who is missing) was actually the type of golddigger it looks like, but accounting for episode name. Its gonna be one of those "the mask grows to fit you" situations where they actually fell for the guy.

---

So Hardisons analysis implies this guy is like, legit as clients go. He's inherited old money not new money, which is the difference between "evil billionaire CEO" and "Born with privilege, gonna use it how I can". Basically: His great granpa would've been a Leverage mark, but he himself is a legit philantropist.

Meanwhile missing wife may in fact be a black widow. (luckily this client has his own goonsquad to protect him, so we dont need to leave Elliot behind to protect him)

---

Parker extremely annoyed she's not allowed to steal any of the rich folks' jewelry at the auction. The Boys deciding to have an auction-shaped dick-measuring contest.

Hardison wins the bid, we are reminded that one of Sophie's aliases is a duchess.

Ok so its an entire army of Sophie's.

Need to fight the ringleader, "pick a fight with Hardisons date". Well she did what you asked her to!

--- "I promise next time, i'll use the word argument instead of fight." Clear Comunication! If only people IRL would learn this lesson.

And once more the little Parker moments "what's a Hohe Minnie?", she's consistently the only member of the Young Thieves who takes an interest in the other people's jobs in the cons they're running. She's definitly being primed as Nate's eventual replacement (wether permanent or temporary).

---

Nate's pajama's. Sophie is loving the idea of a con where Nate has to "pretend" to wine-and-dine her.

I agree with Elliot, the moment it turned out they were grifters, the bet was off. But also, like that we once again get a nod at his cooking skills. "do you want me to teach you about the wines again?" "thats hurtfull and presumptious... but yes."

--- I love the way that Elliot punching the guy out is framed as a shot, good transition. Elliot bribing the guitarist, photographers commentary is great. "I picked you", such a simple statement, Every other member of the group was recruited by Dunevich, but Nate brought Sophie.

---

They found the wife. Suprisingly she isnt dead. (Meredith seems competent enough to tie off that loose end, and i think she could've exposited on the similarity to Nate falling in love with "The Duchess". But then, without recovering the wife Nate doesnt get to have a Favor for use in the season climax)

Seeing the gifts... Im 100% certain Elliot improv'd the guitar as well, that wasnt actually a Nate plan. Just Elliot.

Final tease with Latimer, he's a bit too much of a nothing-character to be truly intimidating, which means either the showrunners are making a mistake somewhere, or he's about to take a big fall to sell the credibility of the guy who he just called. Wait.... i just got a brainniggle. The story he tried to spin to Nate: "Someone stole a guy's patents", thats the same lie used in episode 1 of season 1. This in the same episode that had a reminder about the difference with Sophie and the other members of the team (on the subject of how they joined the team)

Is Latimer working for the Episode 1 mark? Or is my brain just doing that "i've connected the dots" meme?

Guess i'll see in time.

[arthur-lesters-balls]

geto suguru, gojo satoru, and fatalism

im here once again with a long rant that i didnt really bother to reread. if you squint you can see it as a jujutsu kaisen 0 analysis. theres a part where i talk about geto in what can be seen as someone presenting passive suicidal thoughts, but its neither heavy nor explicitly about that so. just warning.

lately ive been thinking a lot about geto being left alone to do whatever he wanted for 10 years because gojo, the only person strong enough to defeat him, simply never tracked him down. almost as a consequence, i eventually put this together with the fact that, even though yuta was the one who did the "difficult" part of defeating geto, gojo was the one to deliver the final blow

one of the first things geto said after seeing gojo in that alley was "to think you'd be the one here at my end", but lately, i cant help but think: wasnt that actually the most obvious end? was there ever any other option of closure for them? and ive been into the idea of stsg + tragedy (as a genre) since i wrote this post, so this somehow resulted in me looking at them with some kind of lazy fatalistic lens

i really like stories where the character tries to flee from an imminent tragedy, but always goes back to the same place, because that is his fate. and, to me, this is exactly what happened with gojo when he tried to avoid killing geto. he didnt go after him, he spent 10 years standing still, believing the distance would be enough to run away from that moral duty

and then geto came back

and then geto went after gojo students. and then geto was the one who made their meeting happen. and then geto was the one who broke that barrier gojo had put up to avoid thinking about that unhealed wound. suddenly gojo was back to shinjuku, ten years ago, with geto saying that killing him or letting him go was his choice and that there would be a meaning to it

and i keep asking myself what was going on in his mind at that moment when geto appeared at jujutsu high? did he acknowledge that irony? did he acknowledge how that seemed like a bad joke being played on him? how long did it take for him to accept what that meant? was it in the classroom, after their talk, looking at the sunset and thinking about how they were actually quite similar to yuta and rika? changing the place of their conversation to the middle of the street, the same place where rika died her premature death? did he think about how they were also stuck at each other, cursed by love, and how the one who placed the curse must be the one to remove it? how, as said by the novel, the curse of geto suguru was a burden only he would be able to carry?

and this whole thing also made me think about geto. we know for a fact he thought that their friendship was over, that he wasnt someone gojo held dear anymore. we also know he thought gojo deserved to hate him, to curse him, to not take that last meeting of theirs and waste it treating him kindly so, to geto, what justified the fact that gojo never found him? i genuinely dont have a theory. im not even sure if i have a hypothesis that is in any way backed up by canon. but, what i can say almost for sure is that he never got it right. and him thinking gojo and him were best friends is proof of that

then the question thats left is: was geto ever aware of the tragic irony of his death by gojos hands? was dying by gojos hands ever a tragedy from his perspective? the way he never put up a fight against that possibility says otherwise. looking at his ideals, living a meaningless life seems a far more tragic thing for him. but wasnt that what he was doing already? doing his best for a goal he knew made no sense? whenever i think about geto saying he didnt expect gojo to be the one there at his end, i cant help but wonder: was that said in a positive way? was that a surprisingly satisfactory means to go? being killed by the person who cursed him and also the person he loved the most; to geto, was there a more meaningful death than that?

[spamtoon]

DCRC PKNA Week 11--Silicon Time!

thankfully our little book club break has meant i've had enough time to rest, get into what is potentially a new hyperfix, and feel motivated to read paperinik! ...and um ducks on the road. at some point that's not now.

you know what. im feeling ultra relaxation for this issue let's go to the cove. nevermind i got distracted and entered the pizza parlor

angus fangus cosplay

starting off and first of all i have to say dear lord. the airport experience is indeed horrendous as someone who has been on an airplane recently the sign "clogged toilets delay flights" baffled me. like i understand why but im also like okay. the toilet is clogged. there are two toilets per plane surely the line woudlnt get that long

im gonna be real i thought big nosed human guy was gonna be exclusive to silicon. like i didnt think he would just. also show up here

the idea that angus fangus hasn't had a day off makes me wonder like. was the new zealand thing last issue technically a work trip despite the fact he was there to save his tribe. because if so that rules

it's nice getting to see scrooge again despite the fact he's probably gonna be written out of the story. i missed him

thought he was wiping his sweat with his money for a second here i'm goign to be so honest. and in the second panel he's sillouetted for no reason it amuses me. i mean i know why hes threatening to ruin donald and uno's situationship but he doesn't know he's doing that

i love you chilling in purple shirt donald

i love their little dumb mirco-bickers. they're so domestic

rip to whatever italian pun was lost in translation here. unless there was no pun and donald is just like ughhhhhhhhhh because he does not care

hi little drink serving robot... these things did exist in the 90s but they were very very basic and mostly for flash. which is why it would absolutely get on the news when the only other news is its hot. donald's pose and uno's response is also so cute im. who would have expected comic silicon would have Uno Content

ohohohohoho... oh no, how tragic! how tragic it would be if a certain robot enjoyer skipped to the next town over for this specific day--nevermind he's on vacation too he's at the supervillain convention in florida (SORRY)

cog these car panels are cool... i am once again praising paperinik action moments

rest in peace all the computers at duckburg technofinancial im glad they at least got a viking funeral

it feels so werid to see angus fangus in a tank top and shorts. he belongs in a trenchcoat. and i just

the way he gazes into the distance makes this panel feel so much more contemplative than it actually is i love it

i love how the evronians have a whole division that's job is just. to deal with xadhoom. who is presumably killing evronians off camera all the time

i hope its a story where its the computer in the tower that did it like we saw in the start but he's just messing around. he's just like hi uno!!! :) remember when ducklair made you i was there when you were born uno and he's like oh BROTHER this guy STINKS !

:// i know the computer literally said the evronians might be useful but like i saw computer wanting to use the spore hatchlings and i was so dissappointed. especially disappointed that he wants to shut uno down. i think. at least i assume its a computer hence the name silicon if it was silicon and it wasnt even a computer there was a guy in front of it i would be SO dissappointed but im pretty sure its the first ducklair sentient technology at this point

i have absolutely zero thoughts about this robot rhyno thing its just an important enough detail i have to bring it up. actualy i do have a thought and its look at him. he's so fucking stupid looking. neutral connotation ITS FUCKING DUE AGAIN? FUCK OFF DUE. i gaslighted myself into thinking we were gonna get a different computer but no. okay. alright

of all the villains to figure out donald's secret identity im so. two. of course. not that he's going to get it i dont know if they'd go that route but

im gonna be so real after his introduction issue i fulyl expected them to never use due again

this panel si so dramtic (i LOVE the rainbow windows) but out of context its just like TWO !!!! im so mad

i know its the 90s but i like how it was confirmed later in ducktales 2017 if due did launch donald like that it wouldn't have done anything as long as he thought about the triplets (or maybe uno in this case) hard enough. our bravest man on two worlds... (yes i know they're different donalds)

IM SO MAD donald just kinda handwaving away the duck avenger's inveolvement. they hate each other so much

im so mad the way he's just. at channel 00 news now. due and the evronians deserve to be fighting each other for a while i think

and that was silicon!! i enjoyed seeing more of uno but i was disappointed the computer turned out to be. due again. but maybe im just a little loser who always wants a new robot OOPS i miss lyla lay hopefulyl we see her next issue considering we're going back to channel 00. hoepfully she had a really good vacation while this was all giong on

[tmabutlesbian]

Hello. Im thinking abt martins mother. N this might be an unpopular idea or even hc but i just think its tragic so.

I think the reason martins mother is so distant n cold is not just because of her sickness or his father + martins likeness to him. Ofc, her sickness impacted her mental health, especially as she got older alongside martin. N ofc her husband leaving her, mostly like because of her sickness didnt do wonders for her mentally. But i read a manga one time, where the sick person intentionally made their loves ones hate them just so its easier to move on when they die.

Martins mother probs knew her life expectancy wasnt great, n unless a miracle came, martin had to take care of her from very young. Not smth a parent wants for numerous reasons. N i think his mom didnt necessarily want martin to just give up so much for her. Not because shes ungrateful but because its unfair to him

"i dont love you cuz u look like him, i still love u cuz ur my son. I cant look u in the eye but i want u to live ur life. I want you to do what i cant do: move on." N what better way to make thay happen if not to make martin hate/not care for her at all. After all it was easy for his father, n they already look so alike, why wouldn't martin take after his father like this as well. But he took after her in this, he wont let go, he cares. His mother turned almost a widow cuz her husband left n she needed to feel devastated by it (n she did); martin took care of hia sick n divorced mother because he is supposed to care for her n therefore so this for her as her son (he does care).

N then i think she regrets this a lot. Because as much as she tried to make martin hate her he kept coming back, he gave up college, he's paying for her med bills, hes keeping her alive while she was nothing but wretched to him assuming he'd discard her one day n that just didnt happen. N now, when he got worse, when they moved to london, when she left their home for the hospital. I think she tried, mental health deteriorating all the while, to at least be a lil softer. To not be so cruel. Just cold. Neutral. Not hostile. N then when she finally left, refusing his calls, one last attempt at keeping him away from a walking dead woman, she felt so alone. But also like it was right. He shouldn't be hung up on her. Move on, live ur life. Let me die.

N i think thats just so tragic

[straighttohellbuddy]

🌈💞💝

YO GENUINELY THANK YOU THIS WAS SO SO GOOD TO ANSWER!! seriously felt v cathartic. I love this ask game a lot, it's got a lot of really great questions !!

��is there a fic that you worked *really fucking hard on* that no one would ever know? maybe a scene/theme you struggled with?

I tend to think I talk too much about my fics as it is, and I've talked about my struggles with my fics as I've been struggling through them, or in hindsight, you know?

So this may be a bit of an unconventional answer, but I'm gonna talk about a fic I haven't spoken about in probably over a year, and still haven't properly published; my Vilbur/Villain!Reader fic, what you love you devour. I'm struggling to write it because I'm overwhelmed with the timeline and how much I want to include, not because of the themes I want to tackle and that I'll tell you about in just a second, I'd just like to make that clear.

But yeah, a few months into writing the fic, I don't remember exactly when, but my understanding of the reader's narrative just kind of... Clicked. I don't know how else to describe it; I'd been writing the fic well enough until that time, but there was a moment where I finally understood it, light the clouds had shifted and I could see the light.

Because it's a story of addiction. Not in the traditional sense, there's no kinds of substance abuse in the fic, but I myself am a recovering addict, and viewing the reader as being in recovery when the story begins, with the things she used to rely on as a kind of coping mechanism (lying and pointless cruelty, among other things) being in her past, but her still being judged for the way she used to be despite making it clear that she was putting in the effort to change, it turns the entire story into a tragedy as it develops further.

To be fair, it's probably mostly just for me at this point, like if you're not familiar with the kind of rhetoric and stuff you hear while in recovery, the reader's feelings and instincts and the like probably won't even clock as an addiction storyline, but it is. Albeit in amongst this incredibly dark, sensationalized, tragic love affair I'm brewing. Or it will be if I could ever publish it.

💞what's the most important part of a story for you? the plot, the characters, the worldbuilding, the technical stuff (grammar etc), the figurative language

I know it's such a cop out answer, but it really varies from fic to fic, and even then it depends on where I am at in writing the fic. I think, and I know its a bit vague, the most important part for me at any given moment is the sensation. Whether that be trying to perfectly capture a moment from a characters perspective, so you know exactly what they're seeing and hearing and thinking and feeling. Or maybe I'm trying to impart a kind of blurry, almost whirlwind as time rushes past and things change all around you as you're caught in this happy rush.

Like I reread too much time together (Corpse) some time ago and I thought for a moment, 'this kind of takes its time' but I wasnt mad about it, and it occured to me that for that fic, it's meant to feel like that, to linger on the little details, the tiny moments, the intricacies of daily life and domesticity; this fic is meant to be as relaxed and as comfortable as home, it's 21k, it's like a warm bath, take your time experiencing this life I've written for you. ❤️

An excerpt to kind of demonstrate what I mean by that

--

--

yeah, so I guess the most important thing to me is the sensation of a fic. I have a very specific vision in my head for each fic usually, and I want to try and impart that sensation/experience onto my audience. Sometimes that prioritises world building, sometimes it's the character and their relationships, sometimes it's the prose itself, it depends on whatever I think is the best way to impart the sensation/experience Ive envisioned.

💝what is a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

I sometimes tend to judge a fics popularity based on, for lack of a better phrase, the quality of audience response, which is to say that pretty best friends (Dream) which I posted on the same day as his face reveal, did better numbers just because of the timing, and I do think it goes pretty alright, but it doesn't get a lot of comments. That wasn't the unexpected one. I posted to show you the stars (and win your heart) (Wilbur) a day before, and while it didn't do as well numerically, I was surprised by the incredibly loving comments the fic recieved?? Like reading it back I'm very pleased with it, but I've been kind of inconsistent with posting, so to have people apparently love it so much?? I was and still am so touched and pleased. I love that fic. And it means so much to me that people still love my work xx

[sorikkung]

IM BACK ON MY BULLSHIT AFTER REREADING ACT 1 NEW AND IMPROVED W MORE BRAINROT LESGO!!!

ive literally just been sending myself discord messages to a private channel while i read SKFDJGKSJF so here is. the compilation i guess

ok so rereading the first few chapters and. i completely forgot san smiled at mc straight away what was that. was it just bc he thought she was hot or did they already know shed be on that ship i needa know how early the plan was set in action... was this entire stowaway thing staged or was it only when san found her in the cargo bay that they were like yup shes a siren (maybe via seonghwa's siren powers sensing her, or when they took her jacket off to treat her arm maybe they saw the tattoo or sumn) like... i get the feeling they knew long before she first revealed it to anyone, based on how san and seonghwas entire relationships w her were done deliberately to gain her trust, it rly just changes the entire way i view these first few chapters its INSANE. i knew things would be drastically different upon a reread but like THIS different... these first chapters seem so light hearted and almost like, typical scifi story beginnings, like typical not as in bad but just standard for the genre yk, like oooh she impresses the captain and earns her place on the ship and they all have tragic backstories... but now knowing there is So Much More going on underneath makes this so much more sinister its Haunting. i fucking love it

also her saying wooyo looks vaguely familiar got me bc it could so easily be read as her seeing his glimpse of tan skin n dark hair before passing out, but no, that vague familiarity was from her past wasnt it... that first meeting w them hits so different knowing wooyo knows who she is the entire time. my god.

i also wanna note how drastically different the writing feels going back - it was good from the start, but only now that im rereading do i realise how much you've improved over the course of writing?? which is to be expected, writing something for this long, but wow, its cool to see the progression of such improvement yk. you went from good writing to Great writing to Every Fucking Line Is Rewiring My Brain Stem. goals

yeah see seonghwa saying joong doesnt make decisions on a whim and obviously decided she could stay long before he told her... he had to have known she was a siren already, right? like, why else would he decide to let her stay... unless it was just bc shes the ghost of eros and he doesnt know the details of that but like, idk, im not buying it

OH and this is reminding me of another thing i cant tell if this is just a progression of writing thing or if its part of the act they put on but like. san and seonghwa seemed like they felt pretty bad about killing up until this point. like seonghwa on the ship saying they dont have to kill everyone vs san wanting so badly to keep mc alive. this is part of why i think they mustve known she was a siren on that ship somehow bc yeah san did the same thing to jongho but we also know that hongjoong knew abt jongho right away. the san we know now doesnt seem like he holds much remorse for what he does bc hes just the captains loyal black dog… tho i do remember him feeling pretty bad abt it in the earlier chapters, i cant tell if thats just something he worked thru w mc or if it was just part of the act to gain her trust. man. i be doubting EVERYTHING now 😭 😭 😭

god i MISSEDDD the feisty sassy interactions w hwa and the mc omg things have gotten so grim now i literally forgot this was their original dynamic… “You’re so feisty, princess. If I didn’t know how dangerous you truly are, I might ask you to spar with me one day.” “You’re so romantic, pretty boy. I’m sure all the ladies love when you say that.” “All the ladies and men, in fact." i still fucking love that entire exchange its so good i love them

"and yet again you find yourself shocked by the boldness of this crew." i am once again wondering how much of this is just them being flirty bastards and how much of it was a LIE… or at least orchestrated SDKFJHKSDFHKSKFD also “Aren’t you a bit too cheeky for a criminal?” “Is there a special guide I should be following? ‘Proper ways to be a criminal’? Rule number one: don’t be cheeky with princess, it gets on her nerves.” is another really good exchange GOD I RLY FORGOT ABT ALL THIS I MISSED IT SO BAD i do love me some good banter. now when hwa uses the nickname princess it just feels so sad 😭 😭 😭

"It’s the little shit who plugged an anesthesia shot into your neck." i love it when fics refer to wooyo as some little shit or anything along the sorts its like. sooo true bestie i see we are thinking abt the same man <3 i love him sm

damn i forgot wooyoung was this Nervous at first, what was up w that… is it bc mc was there?? cause he seems mighty comfortable w the rest of em now SJKFDGKJSFD but then again that could just be after everything that happened afterwards. now i wonder if the real reason he went into the medbay was bc he missed her or sumn.

NOW I FEEL REALLY BAD FOR WOOYO, SEEING HIS LONG LOST CHILDHOOD FRIEND AND THE FIRST THING THEY WANNA DO IS SOCK HIM IN THE NOSE 😭 😭 😭

“Because you’re only good at causing problems, not fucking solving them." DAMN WTF DID WOOYO DO THAT MADE SAN SO MEAN TO HIM 😭 I DONT REMEEMBER THIS…

“In all the time you have worked together, you should know by now how San behaves and that he says things he doesn’t mean.” this hits a lil different now too, is he actually mad at wooyo or just tryna defend mc…. yeah im rly just here doubting every single interaction they have now SJDFKKJSFDHKSDF

"his amount of respect for his captain seemed lackluster at best." LMFAO IF ONLY SHE KNEW. ok so this fr has to be an act bc san would do anything hongjoong asked of him, so this is obviously him tryna appeal to mc as someone who also doesnt always agree w authority so she can confide in him, right?

"Yeosang won the mental battle. He wormed his way into San’s mind and won that way." at… telling him to shut the fuck up?? 😭 😭 howd That worm into his mind 😭

"you seem a bit more like the type who needs to be put in place rather than the other way around.” i rmb first reading this and thinking DAMN that is so ballsy for a man like yeosang to say, but is he just comfortable around her real quickly bc he knew her already. or, well, not comfortable, but comfortable enough to tease her like that hskdfgkjskdjfgsdf

“Oh? I didn’t know that you were an Elitist." yeosang you little shit SDFKJGKSDFKHSFJKDH

this whole interaction with yeosang is sending me now that i know he knows… my god hes such a little SHIT JDKFGKSDFKH

"For someone who is supposed to be a traitor, he sure seems to have a lot of pride in his home and military…" and now im wondering if yeosang really is still prideful which is. entirely possible and i could be reading too far into it or. is he tryna jog a memory….

“You seem to be the type to balance him out with calmness and humility. At least that’s the aura I get from you. Yeosang always feels so angry but you exude the opposite of that.” this bitch? mc? ghost of eros? CALM? SFDKJHSKDFHKSFDK girlies been tryna question n fight every bitch since being put on the ship but like, sure, i guess… lmfaoooo

"You can only hope that he somehow missed the marking on your back." suppose theres a chance he saw it here, but… i doubt it my bets are still on he knew the whole time shkdjfgksdf but i will see if he pays more/different attention to her after this 👁️

“Good girl. See, we can make you obedient yet.” yeah even with the context of all the future chapters what the everloving FUCK was THAT. are he and wooyoung not together already yet no they were together since long before the horizon right. i still dont know what hes playing at here flirting w her so much 😭

“Before it’s all over? How do you think this is going to end, Y/n?” how does HE think its gonna end? do he and wooyo and the others know what the big 3 were plotting to get to our ghost? i was under the impression only they knew about the whole deception to earn her trust thing, esp given how hongjoong treats yunho and manipulates him i figured the others would be the same but like… what answer is yeosang expecting to hear, here?

"And Hongjoong certainly isn’t the type to keep slaves, despite how he might come across sometimes. There’s a difference between being harsh and inhumane.” me when i manipulate peoples feelings, insecurities, trauma and relationships but i draw the line at keeping slaves… SDFKJGJKSDFKJHSDKJF i think hes still harsh and inhumane babes but ok!

“I know one thing for certain. You are not an Elitist.” yeah so he TOTALLY knew she was a siren i forgot abt this SJKDFKJHSKJDFH but hes waiting for her to say it herself, isnt he?

“I have studied Elitists in the past, and I am one myself." no the fuck you aint. SDFKJHKSJFHKJSFDKJHSKFD i used to think joong might be a siren as well himself but seonghwa would know if he was after sleeping w him so long and he still said without mc they only have One siren so… either hes a spectre, which, has no reason to hide from everyone i dont imagine, or hes a normie… my bets are on normie. so used to not being taken seriously for his class that he keeps it a secret and has a need to prove himself. honestly with the new interim id almost believe hongjoong was an elitist More if it werent for yeosang saying theres only one real elitist on the ship and its him SDFKJHSKFHKSDF

reading the first interims now and… man its crazy to think how Soft hongjoong was at the start. he was still cutthroat and ruthless, but he seems so much smaller here. like between this interim and the latest hongjoong interim, you can really tell just how far down he's spiralled. its fascinating. i love character development for the worse <3

goddamn all his worry about his crew members and being scared of breaking their trust… wheres this energy w ghosty SDKFJGKSJFGKSFDKG how far he's fallen fr…

"I don’t know how to fix him. I need to fix him. I need to help him. I just have to do something.” and he calls out mc for having a saviour complex… 🤭

anyway that was my rereading experience but heres some anecdotes from my two friends i dragged into it who Also happened to just finish act 1 and its interims around the same time

>friend 1 messages me randomly "this fic is getting me emotional wtf" and changes the topic when i ask them to elaborate KSJDFGKJ

they then (the next day) send me this screenshot followed by "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

and this one followed by "FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK"

then i asked what they think of it overall so far and they said is very good, theyre excited for the pace to pick up!

meanwhile friend number 2 was going thru it so i am suppling screenshots (mind the lack of cohesion theres conversations in between some of these but im tryna cap just whats strictly relevant LMFAO)

(this was the screenshot they attached w the withered wojack)

anyway if these friends r seeing this sorry for exposing u lol but i am at least preserving ur anonymity to a number <3 actually wait you shouldnt be reading this bc mad spoilers. well ANYWAY. i imagine the only one reading this far is the author so caly i hope this brings u some modicum of joy <3 KSJFDJGKSDFKJ onto the next act!! 🤩🤩🤩

tbh it was rly good timing that we all finished the act around the same time i have no idea what im gonna do when the reading inevitably gets disjointed (haha unless...?) i guess id chuck those into your ask box??? or would dming you be ok. man either way i am flooding the fuck outta ur notifs lately and i apologise do lmk if you want me to slow down SKDJFGJKSFKDJGSKJFD hope ur having a good day regardless :>

mists of celeste ➻ one

➻ pairing: ??? x fem reader ➻ genre: space au, pirate au, space pirate!ateez, angst, eventual smut ➻ Word Count: 4.5k ➻ Rating: M ➻ Warnings: language, violence, guns and weaponry, blood, future warnings tba ➻ summary: Sneaking aboard the ship of a renowned space pirate may not have been the best idea, but you’ll have to make do with what fate has handed to you 

⇐ previous | next ⇒

mists of celeste act one ➻ part one

‎

“You said that you’re with the military? I don’t recall the military having ships as small as yours.” If possible, your eyes would roll all the way back in your head at the man’s comment. Instead, you plaster a smile on your lips, gaze flitting around the bridge as you do. 

“Yes, Ambassador Salvadore. They sent me on a transport ship, as I am here to relieve the captain of his duties—”

“That is not necessary, Miss.”

“—on military orders, Ambassador.” Your grin continues to stretch as you gauge the state of the bridge. It is severely lacking in terms of soldiers, which is good for you on multiple fronts, but the ambassador before you is proving to be more difficult than you first anticipated.

Keep reading

[valdrift]

thoughts on the nine eyes of lucien so far at chapter 24 bc ohhh my god. oh my god. ok

seeing what lucien was like before becoming the nonagon ltr makes my heart hurt 😭 he was a normal guy (as normal as u can be as a run orphan) who joked with his friends and cared for them and loved them. like he rlly did love his friends u can see it in the way they interact. and the dynamic and banter between them was soo.....AUGH. it wasnt like lucien was the leader and they all followed him with distant respect, they all Cared for each other, and the tombtakers expressing worry when lucien started getting entranced by the journal....good lord. theyre like the m9 but things just. didn't work out for them and it feels so tragic.

confirmed last name for lucien! lucien tavelle....still got a surname starting with t lol

ALSO U KNOW WHAT ELSE IS CONFIRMED? GENDERFLUID LUCIEN LETS FUCKING GO!!!

ok so lucien's past with his family. it's just. Wow. right off the bat we learn he's got a background with performance tying into molly being in a circus, and lucien's tendency to perform constantly and put up a mask. we also find out he's a middle child! he's got a younger sister and an older brother who got Turned Into A Fucking Skin Puppet ???? and lucien's parents forced him to be a lure for the same witch that turned his brother into a skin puppet by getting her more people to turn into skin puppets?? SO much to unpack, we just know lucien has preexisting trauma surrounding soulless and empty husks.

and speaking of lucien's family--aldreda. oh my god aldreda. their reunion hit me like a sack of bricks. it felt like the start of ppl lucien cared abt distancing themselves from him bc of his own choices. it was like he was so caught up in meeting the expectations he set for himself, to protect and provide for aldreda (the performance theme!!), tht he became someone his own sister couldn't recognize. his inability to be honest abt himself and the things he's done only driving a wedge between them further. and it is actually kind of heartbreaking to see how excited lucien is to see aldreda again only to be met without the same enthusiasm and tht she doesn't want him in her life anymore.

brevyn/lucien killed me so fucking bad. the casual intimacy, the silent communication, the way they clicked, the muddled gray area of friendship and smth more, the obvious adoration lucien had for her. ltr every scene brev showed up in, lucien can NOT stop thinking abt how shes so strong/beautiful/charming etc. like can you STOPPP 😭😭 and their final scene is so painful.......when the book is starting to sink its claws into lucien and brev sacrifices herself to get it for him, smth tht will ultimately be his downfall...SCREAM.

the way the book and the effects it has on lucien is described is genuinely kind of disturbing. the more u read, u can practically See the start of luciens spiral and the way his mind starts to splinter. the little details of him not realizing the passage of time, not eating or sleeping because he's so absorbed in it....Wow. and the change in his personality is subtle but still noticeable which i think rlly adds to how unsettling it feels. he's still mischievous and cocky but theres smth Off abt him with his obsession over cognouza and the somnovem.

EDIT: ALSO. I LIKED THE SMALL DETAILS OF HIM BEING A LIL SILLY :) the scene where hes like "hey cree look at this funny hat i found!" and when vess derogna yells at him he's just like >:( and puts the hat on and sits down by the wall LMAO

[zombiedcattle]

hiiiiii guys this is the beginning of a series of posts im writing on why dst means so much to me as an autistic/trans/etc etc person . a very ramble-y simple thing thats been gnawing at my brain

ok so first up is wendy bc ofc it is , shes been my fav for 8 years lol. i feel like she tends to get characterized as a “tumblr sadgirl” or a dramatic kid bc of her nihilistic and flowery (pun intended) way of speaking, but the description for her victorian skin - “Wendy is the queen of strict, socially mandated mourning practices.” - got me thinking about this a whole lot :

wendy barely ever mentions her family (besides abigail obviously). her father only once, and her mother a handful of times, though with uncertainty sometimes (“What color were mother’s eyes?”). she never mentions having any friends before meeting webber. so we can infer that not only was abigail her best friend and twin sister, she was the only person wendy had ever really been close to at all. in her short we see that even before abigails death she was very introverted and withdrawn when shes not around abigail. so losing abigail wasnt just losing her sister, but losing the only friend she had, the only person she was genuinely close to and loved by. this would destroy anyone but wendy was also just a lonely little kid, only 10 years old in canon (possibly younger when abigail died)! shes a kid wrought with unfamiliar and overwhelming grief

so of course she turns to structure. acting and dressing like how youre expected during a funeral, with a set schedule to follow; reading popular poems and narratives crafted with objective literary devices; even taking and wearing abigails old clothing and parting her hair the way her sister used to. wendy is very set on boxing her emotions in by what she believes to be the standard set by people who have come before her. to her, grief should be artsy, clean, something mature that puts you above finding joy in the little things. a Tragedy with a capital t, nothing more and nothing less.

she remains loyal to this ideology because its the only way she knows how to cope. shes young and grief is such a messy emotion, so she just … doesnt deal with it. that, + the “Wendy clings fiercely to the grief over her sister's death, for fear that moving on would cause Abigail's memory to fade.” vignette, leads to this tragic, sophisticated persona shes cultivated bc she cant get over seeing herself as nothing more than only half of a pair

as an autistic person, boxing feelings neatly instead of actually feeling them bc its too overwhelming is something ive done more times than i can count . i also struggle with seeing myself as an actual person instead of just defining myself by my relationships to other people or by how i think people want me to be. i cant think of any other characters like wendy — her writing is handled so amazingly well, she is so nuanced and ive never seen any piece of media tackle portraying a thought process like hers. it means a lot to me and i feel very seen by it, so i wanted to put in my two cents

thanks for reading guys ^_^ i hope this resonates with you guys as well and maybe makes you consider wendys writing in a way you hadnt before. having a great day <3

[rubylane]

friend... why would you do this to me. i watched it. my heart is broken. like i am crying my eyes out rn... how did they convey the feeling of nostalgia, friendship, love, and heartbreak in 2 hrs like this. if im being honest i went into it not expecting to be attached to the story that much cus its only 2 hrs, they wont make me feel what baekdo has (sorry i had to compare) but it was.. so freaking sweet? like her loyalty and love to her friend that she went out of her way to put her feelings first cus she loves her friend that much but her friends feelings are valid too she shouldve told her ;-; but oh man... i fucking bawled my eyes at the train scene... then got confused as to why in the world did he go MIA (i had baek yijin flashbacks) and honestly wasnt even thinking the worst. her crying on her blind date cus they had the same name was REAL i felt it... (also this is how i felt baekdo would've been tbh) only for me to find out he passed away I HATE IT HERE AND THE VIDEO AT THE END ARE U KIDDING ME IM SO FUCKING SAD.. he was going to see her. i wonder what happened 😭 they weren't even dating for real yet and all these memories were the sweetest things. i dont even know how to talk about it. i felt a lot. like i was thinking about a love i can't even reach anymore, but when someones gone gone 🥺 i guess it can still be the same pain if that makes sense. i was pleasantly surprised how much i enjoyed them. im sad but a good sad 🥺

AAAAAAAAAAA I AM SO SORRY ))))))): i feel like you've properly laid out my exact experience as well because i went into the movie thinking 1) oh omg 90s! maybe this one won't hurt me like 2521 and i looooove love love when things take place in earlier decades 2) oh it's only a movie? ok i probably won't be as invested 3) and then i was wrong <3

the last like, thirty minutes of the movie HITS you when you least expect it and i think that was what really got me?? because i'm thinking wow, he moved on, he got too busy, he just couldn't make time for her (basically following the same thought process that bora might have had) and then....................THAT.

tHE TRAIN SCENE WAS SO BEAUTIFUL AND HEARTBREAKING AND WHO KNEW THAT WAS GOING TO BE THE LAST TIME THEY SAW EACH OTHER !!! I AM SO SAD AND UPSET !!!

also ur not wrong for making a baekdo comparison, i've seen a few posts talking about how if 2521 followed the plot of 20th century girl, it could've been a better ending in terms of a "well-done sad ending"

THERE'S JUST SO MUCH TO FEEL AND THINK AND PROCESS !!! I FEEL YOU COMPLETELY ))): IT'S SUCH A GOOD, BEAUTIFUL, BITTERSWEET STORY ))): i think one of the things i loved about it was that they had such a strong bond, despite being in the "early" stages of their relationship? like the use of "like" as opposed to "love" makes it that much more heartbreaking because you can't help but think of what could've been. in a way, they're almost like that "almost" tragic poem. like they almost could've had it all, they almost, almost almost ............. but couldn't.

there are some theories about what happened to woonho, like him dying on the plane back to korea when surprising her ( though i feel she would have heard about it ). i *personally* think it was either a case of him being terminally ill and dying before he could see her one last time, or a car accident of some sort. either way. P A I N .

thank you for going on this journey with me, i'm glad you enjoyed the movie nonetheless ))):

[silverprism-s]

#don't hide the tags they are beautiful and right!

>i won't elaborate. >elaborates. okay... i won't hide them then... this is going to get long so... read more...

#i wont elaborate atm but ive been thinking about it for awhile#ive also been avoiding reading other peoples analysises on it bc frankly if i was reading other peoples#analysises i would start creating Problems for them and Me#but yeah so he got exactly what he deserved and its not all bad#i really dont think gojo formed close relationships w anyone other then geto (proved by that pg from his booklet)#he let everyone else see him as a coworker only#abd he did that on purpose....#now#his students he was close to#and they will remember him well. despite him saying dont remember me#they wont remember him as gojo satoru the strongest but as gojo-sensei their teacher#and thats so kind of them 🥺🥺#okay anyways i still dont like the jjk ending but gojo's ending was good and if someone tells you otherwise they were one of the people who#were clowning for him to return unnecessarily and you shouldnt trust their opinions#i love gojo so so so much but please my man needs his rest okay

OKAY PLEASE ALLOW ME TO ELABORATE MORE.

gojo is still a super tragic character. let me grab you by the face and look you in the eyes while i say this again. gojo satoru is still an extremely tragic character. okay? okay. this is important.

he purposefully kept himself distant from others throughout his life, before and after geto. i honestly think he didnt even ever mean to get close to geto! it happened and then he paid the price for it. because he was unable to Look and See what was going on w geto post star plasma vessel arc. and because of that he paid the price, and so he kept himself distant from others, and other sorcerers let him, because Gojo Satoru is the strongest sorcerer of the modern era. keeping himself separate from others was a coping mechanism to deal with the harsh realities of being a jujutsu sorcerer. (in the faq, it says that he had resigned himself to the reality that anyone other then himself could die at any given moment. if you're walking around expecting that, i think you too would find yourself struggling to form close connections with people...)

when we see itadori and gojo in chapter 271, gojo states "haven't we had enough gojo satoru?" and itadori is obviously confused. he wasnt raised as a sorcerer and is still relatively new to the whole being a sorcerer thing in the first place (itadori ate sukuna's first finger in June 2018 and gojo died on december 24th 2018!) so he probably isnt totally aware of how othered gojo is a whole, he just sees Gojo-sensei not Gojo Satoru the strongest sorcerer (of the modern era)!

Kugisaki is similar to Itadori as well, she wasn't really raised as a sorcerer (from what we see). Fushiguro definitely was, but he was helped by Gojo from a younger age and so he feels closer to Gojo then any of his coworkers as well. Then there's also Maki, Panda, Toge and Yuta, although we don't really see their thoughts as much as i would really like to seen.

Okay, so the trio in particular doesn't see Gojo only for his strength. I really do think he was a good teacher to them, as best as he could've been with how fucking busy the poor guy was all the time (seriously, DAILY meetings with the higher ups? I'd go fucking mad). They appreciated him as a teacher and guiding adult hand, and were able to see past the bravado of The Strongest.

Chapter 271, the conversation between Itadori and Gojo. Itadori says none of us could forget you, and tells Gojo that he's acting out of character. Gojo responds with "This is confidence. Confidence I've never had before." (UGH THIS LINE KILLS ME). When Gojo said this, I think this is where he sorta realized that The Kids are Alright afterall. This is why when Gojo died, he died with only one regret (that Geto wasn't there to pat him on the back). He's asking Itadori to grow beyond him in multiple ways! As a sorcerer, and as a person! sdfiughwritgewt UGH.

his students will remember gojo as a teacher and not as a powerhouse like most sorcerers will, and that's so much more then he expected when he began his endeavor as a teacher! really, gojo wasn't going to get a better end then this. there wasn't another better ending. he wasn't going to suddenly start connecting with the people around him and he wasnt about to come back with less power because his power was still important to himself. gojo loved having power and he wasnt going to come back with less of it because he was confident with his students and where he left them off yet.

he achieved his dreams, as limited as they may have been! i'm not gonna proof-read this but yeah here you go, my insane rambling about gojo as a character. he's still tragic. he missed out on a lot from life, but he still got a good ending, and there wasn't any better ending for him, based on the choices he made throughout his life.

is it sad? yes!! i am so fucking sad!!! i could cry about this dumb ass bitch all day! is it a bad end?? NO!!! IT IS NOT A BAD ENDING!! IT IS GOOD!

if u read all this, hi, love u, thanks for reading. lets have fun w gojo in fanart and fanfics now :3 i know i will be

i have a lot of thoughts bouncing around in my mind but... i think gojo got exactly the ending he deserved. and... thats not a bad thing.

[tastyykpop]

𝐶𝑟𝑎𝑧𝑦 𝑖𝑛 𝐿𝑜𝑣𝑒-Part 1

Pairings: yandere mafia leader!baekhyun x reader

Genre: suggestive, smut in later chapters, angst probs, fluff here and there but its very lowkey

《teaser next》

Warnings: kidnapping, drug use, alcohol consumption, baeks kinda crazy, pet names, master kink, spanking (he literally spanks her once), choking (not in a kinky way), mentions of blood and murder

Word count: 4.9k

Tag list: @wooya1224 @geniusloey tell me if you want to be tagged!!

⚠️ this is purely fictional and not how I imagine baekhyun to actually act. If you feel like you're in a situation like this please run and report it. I do not support this behavior.

How long has it been? 3 or 5 days? Maybe even a week. You didnt know nor did you care. But why would you? You've gave up caring ever since your boyfriend, Sungho was murdered right in front of you, but you couldn't even see who the murderer was which drove you insane.

Tears and blood stained your pretty skin that night, so much agony and rage ran through your veins. All you wanted to do was curl up into a ball and scream until you passed out. But its been days since you've gotten a proper good night's sleep and it was eating you away ever so slowly. Everytime you closed your eyes, you remembered that dreadful day, Sungho's screams, the terror on his beautiful face, his lifeless bloody body. What did he do to deserve death? Why did it have to be him?

"Y/n! Y/n, its been four days please come out of your room!" It was the familiar voice of your mother and her knocking that brought you back to reality. She was almost begging, she hasn't seen you since you locked yourself away that night so you couldnt blame her for being worried, but you were fine. "I'm coming in."

She pushed your door open to see you cuddling your blanket with no emotion on your face. You looked at her with barely any care and rolled over, facing away from her.

She sighed and sat on the edge of the bed, "You know y/n, we'll get to the bottom of this and have them put behind bars. It's gonna be ok-"

"No its not," you rasped from not using your voice in so long, "I dont even know what the murderer looked like, how can we put them behind bars!?" There was a small pause, she knew finding them wasnt likely which hurt you like hell, but she was still trying her best to comfort you.

"...At least come out of your room, everyone's worried." Your mother pleaded and though you really didnt want to move, you didnt want to upset or worry anyone any further so you got up.

With a smile, she did the same and led you downstairs to where you dad and sister were. They tensed when they saw you, but nonetheless smiled sadly, thanking the heavens you were okay.

"You look horrible..." your sister, Haeun, commented making you cringe. It wasnt like she was wrong, you spent four days not taking a shower and sitting in the same clothes so of course you looked bad, who wouldn't.

You excused yourself and went into the kitchen grabbing the first thing you saw, a bottle of vodka. Now it wasnt the best drink you could've had, but you decided to drink away your pain and suffering since you couldnt take the heart ache any longer.

"Shes doing it again." Your mother whispered but you heard her clear as day. "Shouldnt we stop her?"

"What for? She won't listen and she's traumatized. There's nothing much we could do right now." Your dad spoke with sadness watching as you took a quick swig from the substance.

Normally, you're not one to drink vodka but now it felt good, maybe too good. The more you drank it, the less pain you were in. It could last forever, you thought, but nothing lasts forever.

As you poured yourself another drink, you started wondering about Sungho again. If there were an afterlife, was he happy there? Would he be watching over you, making sure you were happy and healthy?If only it were that simple.

Though you and him were starting to drift off a bit, you still cared and loved him and now you're starting to take everything you guys went through for granted. Its what you get.

Standing up, you left the kitchen a bit dizzy from only drinking alcohol and having nothing else in your system and went back upstairs to take a shower. You decided after drinking, you wanted to go to the club you always go to. Normally, you didnt go on a Thursday, but you thought since you haven't been out in a while that it would be good to leave and breathe in the fresh air.

You took a fairly quick shower and your hair and makeup didnt take long either. Finally stopping to look at yourself in the mirror, your saw how pale and tired you were. Almost lifeless. You figured that once you finally have a good time, it would all go away and you'd be happy again.

"Where are you going?" You jumped at the voice of Haeun who appeared out of nowhere.

"To the club." You stated nonchalantly,

Haeun frowned, "Thats not a good idea, all you'll do is drink until you pass out. And there's always weirdos waiting for their turn with someone vulnerable like that."

A smile formed on your face trying to lighten up the mood a bit, "Ill be fine. I promise nothing bad will happen."

Haeun sighed, almost sounding like a bratty child who didn't get their way because she knew she wouldn't change your mind no matter how hard she tried. It sucked to have a stubborn sibling like yourself.

Sehun rolled his eyes at the sight of Baekhyuns scheduled flirting session. The girl was dressed in barely anything and he could tell she was probably Baekhyuns new toy for the night as he started getting handsy with her. But Sehun could see how Baekhyuns eyes weren't always looking at her. Instead, they sometimes searched passed the girl in hopes to find something else. He knew what, actually who he was searching for so he never asked or mentioned it.

He remembered you perfectly. Your calm and sleeping figure laying peacefully on your boyfriends chest. It was a shame he had to wake you up while he killed the man. And it was a shame to see such a pretty girl cry and scream with such fright in her eyes.

But Sehun didn't feel that bad, he did what he was supposed to do with only a little remorse.

"Sehun," Baekhyun called, the younger lifted his head waiting for him to continue, "Are you sure you didn't hurt my little toy the other day?"

Sehun scoffed, "If I did, I'd be dead by now, hyung."

The man chuckled sadistically , "She hasn't been here in a while," Baekhyun looked up from the girl and turned to Sehun, "Its only safe to ask."

"Hyung, I told you before that shes probably scared." Sehun face palmed when Baekhyun glared at him.

"A little red shouldnt effect someone that bad."

"I kil-" Sehun stopped what he was about to say, forgetting about the girl straddling Baekhyuns lap and cleared his throat, "Shes not used to stuff like that, Baek."

He didn't care about what Sehun said and ignored the youngests pointless blabbering, returning his attention back the girl only for a short amount of time until something caught his attention.

You walked in his club with confidence and beauty not giving any staring man the time of day and took your usual seat at the bar. After ordering your drink, you put your head in your arms and Baekhyun grinned.

Now was his chance, there's no way anyone will get in his way and there was no way he'd let this chance go.

"Stay here." Baekhyun said to Sehun, pushing the girl off him as he stood up. She almost pulled him back but he gave her such a terrifying death glare that made her stop.

"Theres no way youre actually gonna go talk to her...right?" Sehun questioned a bit shocked that Baekhyun was actually going to you after so long.

"Of course I am, I'll be back." With that, Baekhyun walked away from the two with only one thing on his mind: you.

He waltzed with a smirk of pure evil. What would he do? Only God knew, but he couldnt help himself when he saw your pretty face.

All eyes watched Baekhyun stop next to you, astonished that he went to talk to a girl and not the other way around, "Excuse me sweetheart," You popped your head up in the direction Baekhyun spoke, he took a seat next to you with an almost comforting smile when he saw your red cheeks, "But are you okay."

You wanted to spill everything that happened so bad because you needed to get it out, but you didnt know the man and neither did he know you so all you could do was nod, "Im fine."

Baekhyun knew behind your lying eyes was someone in pain and searching for a person to hold, but he couldnt do anything just yet and tried loosening you up to him so he could do what he wanted to do in the first place.

"C'mon sweetheart, you can tell me anything." He smiled that charismatic smile of his, "I'm easy to talk to."

It was believable for the most part and you laughed a bit, the first laugh you actually had since that tragic night, "You seem like a sweet talker," you smirked causing Baekhyun to chuckle, "Whats the catch?"

"There is no catch, I just wanted to know if youre okay. And besides, I could tell you've been crying." He pointed to your tear stained cheeks and you mentally cursed yourself for unintentionally crying just a few moments ago.

"Oh.."

"Dont worry," He chuckled, "Whatever it is im sure you'll get over it." Baekhyun almost failed to hide his sinful smug as you frowned and covered it quickly with a swig of your drink.

But something inside was eating you away about what happened, you needed to let out your emotions and you started caring less and less that he was a stranger. Then again, what if you scared him away? What will happen next?

"At least tell me your name first," You blushed and shyly looked over at him who had an expecting glint in his eyes, "Then maybe ill tell you why I'm so upset."

Baekhyun stretched his hand out in front of him and you gently shook it. Damn he had a strong grip, "My names Byun Baekhyun and you?" He asked as if he didnt know who you were.

"Y/n L/n." You beamed, wondering why his name was so familiar. "So uh- my story..." Fumbling with the drink in your hands, you sighed heavily, "Long story short, my boyfriend was...murdered in front of me." You mumbled the last bit, but you didnt need to repeat yourself as Baekhyun already knew every single detail of that night thanks to Sehun.

Placing a soft hand on your shoulder he whispered with fake sympathy, "I understand now why you're so upset," Liar, "I feel terrible," No he doesn't.

He wiped a stray tear that had slipped down your cheeks and sent you a solemn look.

"I-its in the past i guess." You muttered, "I can't change a thing about it."

Damn right you couldnt. Even if there were some form of time travel, Baekhyun wouldn't dare let you try and change the past because that would mean you weren't entirely his. But since there isn't anything like that, Baekhyun has nothing to worry about except figuring out how to bring you back with him.

"Would you like a glass of water, y/n?" Baekhyun asked quickly as a thought popped into his head. You nodded your head slowly and Baekhyun called over the bartender. You werent really paying attention to him ordering the water and just let your mind slip to the sound of the music and looked around the room, tapping your fingers to the beat, but you stopped when you felt a pair of sharp eyes watching you from somewhere. You looked here and there before stopping on a man that was a about a few inches taller than Baekhyun. He had a eerie grin on his face when you noticed him, then he winked.

Chills went down your spine and you spun yourself around in your chair facing forwards causing Baekhyun to raise an eyebrow but he didnt question it.

"Heres the water." He handed the drink over and you thanked him before taking a sip. It tasted a bit weird but not all water tasted the same, though it was slightly dry for water.

"So tell me about yourself, y/n." Baekhyun checked his watch, all he needed was fifteen minutes then you were all his. "You seem like an interesting person." He looked up and smiled.

"Well," You thought about what was possibly interesting enough to tell him, "Im in my second year of college!" A smile crossed your lips.

"Oh really? Where do you go?" Baekhyun did seem interested to know some parts of your life. Somehow, you caught his attention like that. Thats why Sehun was a surprised when he finally made his move with you.

"Seoul of Performing Arts." You beamed. It was the happiest moment in your life when you got accepted and all of your family members, extended and close, celebrated your acceptance, "My boyfriend, Sungho, went there too."

He just about rolled his eyes but replaced it with a nod and a fake warm smile. If you knew him better, you'd know that smile was only him clenching his jaw in anger.

"How cute." The glint in his eyes proved he was lying and maybe you were too stupid or innocent to notice when you took another sip of water.

He watched and wished his plan could go faster, he was excited to have fun with his pretty little toy and he couldnt wait any longer.

"What about you?" You raised a brow. There was still something in your gut that made you feel like you knew him. And you still wondered why. Was he someone famous in the city? Maybe you've heard your friends mention him here and there? What was it about him that was so familiar?

"You'll know soon enough kitten." You frowned at the pet name as he pat your head like you were a small child yet you chose to ignore it.

It was a bit outlandish and made you more skeptical to know who he was.

"Thats not very reassuring, Baekhyun." Your quirked.

"Why tell you when I can just show you?" He leaned in, mocking your now pouty lips and chuckled, "The drugs should be setting in by now."

You lifted your head up with wide eyes, "Wait what?" Did you hear him right? Did he say what you thought he said? "What do you mean drugs!?" You said with awestruck as your heart raced in fear. You hoped to god he was just joking

The man before you smirked that unpleasant smirk of his, almost like the guy you saw before and you started panicking more, knowing he wasn't kidding. You tried to get up and run but you felt so woozy in a matter of seconds. Not to mention the sudden pain in your stomach that made you want to throw up. What was Baekhyuns plan? Why did he do this!? You thought at least one thing could go right tonight and maybe you could have fun, but you were wrong. So so wrong.

Trying to leave the club building, you knew you wouldn't make it but you still wanted to attempt an escape. It didn't have to be like this. Each step made it harder to move and your eyes started drooping. It was too late for you.

Already collapsed on the ground, people gasped and stared at your almost lifeless body as Baekhyun tilted his head to the side, "She tried, ill give her that." He walked over and crouched down next to you, moving the hair out of your pale face, "But not hard enough."

In an instant, your body was thrown over the man's shoulder. No one commented on anything that happened in fear that they could be next. It was impossible to say that they felt bad either, they were just glad it didn't happen to themselves.

"Sehun," He called out to the younger male but Sehun was already ahead of him, "You drive." He tossed him the keys.

With a nod they both walked out, you on Baekyuns shoulder as he took you to the expensive car. Gently, he placed you down in backseat, putting your seatbelt on for you, and climbed in on the other side to sit next to you.

"All this just for a girl." Sehun shook his head but needless to say he still smirked, "Youre loosing yourself, hyung." The car sparked and drove off into the night, no cops came searching. They knew better. And neither was there news of your kidnapping, the city stayed quiet.

Sure once your parents realized you were gone they'd start freaking out, but would they dare mess with Baekhyun? Would anyone actually try to mess with him? The mafia could easily answer that with an optimistic no. Remember, Baekhyun had power. No one is going to stop him.

"How long will she be out for?" Sehun asked.

Baekhyun shrugged, "Like an hour or two." He was excited for your life with him now, he knew you were finally his after a year of watching you come and go in his club, plus the small stalking he did when he wanted to see you, and he could only smile. No one can get in between him and your love anymore. "Shes gonna love it when she gets home!"

Sehun chuckled at Baekhyuns almost child like enthusiam and started, "She seems a bit innocent," he paused, looking back at your passed out body in the mirror before returning back to the road, "Normally women don't look off into space when someone's buying them a drink."

"Maybe she's a bit slow, but she wouldn't be here with me if that didn't happen."

The candle flickered in the dark as you awoke on a strange bed. You're head was pounding a bit as you tried looking around at your unfamiliar surroundings. What happened? Was your first thought and you started questioning where you were too. You knew something wasn't right but you couldn't understand why.

You tried getting up only to be locked in place by restraints on your wrists. They were only silk but they were tied tight enough to keep you still. Tilting your head in confusion, you heard foot steps coming towards the door and stopping for a mere few seconds before the door handle twisted.

You anticipated what was going to happen, you didnt even know what was going on in the first place, but you remembered the man standing in front of you.

"B-Baekhyun..?"

"Hey, kitten." That sinister smile was plastered on his face. You were sure it held more meanings then just one.

"Where a-am i?"

He almost cooed at your curiosity but composed himself, "At my mansion, where you'll be staying from now on."

There was a moment where you had to think, interestingly enough what Baekhyun said didnt even frighten you in the slightest, but then again you were high off the drug.

"C-Can you u-untie my hands please?" Your voice was soft and quiet, Baekhyun noticed you werent fully aware of your surroundings and complied, untying the silk from your wrists.

Your eyes were a little dilated when you looked at him. He was gorgeous, you had to give him that, though you wanted to remember why something wasn't sitting right with him. "Baekhyun?"

He looked up with a hum.

"Who...are y-you to me?" You squinted your eyes at the man who sat on the bed next to you, drawing small shapes on your thigh in a sort of loving manner.

"Your boyfriend, y/n."

Boyfriend? You have a boyfriend?

"I have a boyfriend..?" You muttered and asked more to yourself than to him, but he snickered, knowing way more than you did.

"Kitten you drank too much, go back to sleep." He lied and pushed your shoulders down so you were flat against the mattress.

"I-i did?" You whined when Baekhyun kissed your cheek. He always wanted to kiss more than your cheek, he couldnt bring himself to do that unless you were fully conscious for him.

"Yes baby girl, so get some sleep."

You grumbled, "I-Im not t-tired."

Baekhyun sighed, "Then what would the pretty girl like to do?"

You perked up on the mattress and grinned, "Im hungry!"

"Youre hungry?" Baekhyun repeated with a smile at your small childlike energy and you nodded back, "I can ask someone to make you something if you'd like."

"Please!"

He stood up, waiting for you to do the same but since you weren't very awake, you stumbled a bit.

Baekhyun settled with carrying you to the mansions kitchen, awing at your cuteness the whole time. It was a bit of a walk but luckily you were light.

Sitting you down, Baekhyun walked off, finding someone to cook for you. In your state, you felt a bit lonely, only knowing Baekhyun and not your surroundings, it made you feel a bit lost. It shocked you too how you didnt remember Baekhyun being your boyfriend, you started question the relationship between the two of you more.

"Princess i got you your favorite dish!" He walked in with a plate of jjajangmyeon and set it down in front of you.

Your mouth was watering and you were ready to dig in before wondering, "H-How do you know m-my favorite dish?"

Baekhyun hesitated at the question before clearing his throat and spoke with a raised brow, "We're dating y/n, why wouldn't I know what you like?"

"Uh yeah..right...." you dug in, your mind was starting to clear up a bit, not enough for you to fully remember anything though. But the more you thought, the more consciousness you regained.

Baekhyun watched as you gobbled down the meal with full satisfaction. This wouldn't be the first time he's watched you and neither would it be the last. He liked knowing you were eating well and were healthy so he was proud.

"I-im done!"

"Good girl. Now wait for me to come back so we can go to bed, okay?" You nodded and sat patiently as he took your plate and waited for your boyfriend to come back.

A few moments later, Baekhyun still was no where to be seen and your mind was slowly coming back, "N-no...wait." mumbling to yourself, you figured it out in just mere seconds and remembered that your boyfriend was brutally murdered four days ago in front of you. After four days you went to the bar to drink away the anguish and met someone, that someone was Byun Baekhyun. After thirty or so minutes of talking to him, you were drugged when you werent paying attention and passed out minutes later. Now you were here at Baekhyuns mansion, lied to and kidnapped. "Oh fuck."

The chair scraped against the floor and you wasted no time running to your hopeful freedom.

But you weren't a lucky person. Oh no you weren't. You were tossed and pushed against the door you were about to open by someone much bigger. He was the same guy you saw at the bar and his smirk was nothing different. Cynical and frightening.

The man stepped closer to you before putting one hand next to your head and whispered, "Are you playing a cat and mouse game with hyung now? How cute." Standing tall, he grabbed you by the hair and dragged you back to where you came. You groaned and tried fighting back, but there was no use, he wasn't going to let go until after he practically threw you into Baekhyuns arms.

You were about to scream at Baekhyun and the no name man until Baekhyun covered your mouth with his hand, "Say something and you'll regret it." He growled into your ear as you shook and fought.

You hummed against him and tried biting his hand and punching his side, but he was like a man of steel and let it happen, only raising his brow like he wanted to hurt you, but didnt.

"Sehun, tell Chanyeol to lock all the doors for the next week or so 'til she learns how to behave."

The man nodded and ran off leaving you two alone. Fear was one way to describe it and the look Baekhyun gave you didnt help.

"Now kitten why would you go and do some shit like that? Are you asking to be punished?" He took his hand off your mouth to let you speak. Baekhyuns aura was much different than earlier. The nice guy was gone and you were left with a man who could kill you with just one look.

You stopped hitting him and screamed viciously, "Fuck you! You're fucking insane!"

"Now now princess," he pressed a hand to your throat, wrapping it tighter and tighter until you felt the oxygen leave your lungs, "It seems as if you're asking for a punishment."

"I-if you...s-so dare to-touch..any other p-part of my body, i-ill....kill you..." You whimpered, grabbing his wrist in attempts to pull him off but Baekhyun was relentless, keeping his grasp tight and painful.

"Stop struggling, you're only making this harder for yourself."

There were two options now, either listen to Baekhyun or fight until you passed out again.

"Princess." His voice held a warning tone and you hesitantly stopped and moments later he loosened his grip, you knew there would be marks by tomorrow, "We are going to bed now. Don't try to run, I have this place guarded up and if you do somehow make it out, be prepared because I will find you and beat your ass until you can't sit for a month. Understand?"

Your stomach did flips and not in a good way, you were scared, "Y-yes."

"Can you say 'yes master'?" His voice went higher as he said the last part to mimic yours.

You sighed, positive if you didnt comply then you'd be here all night, "Yes m-master..."

"Good girl." He kissed your cheek and you almost smacked him in disgust but tried not to act aggressive towards him. You wanted to leave, not be punished by whatever he had in mind. "Call me that from now on."

Baekhyun grabbed your hand and led you to the room you were just in, now that you took a good look, it was a pretty room. There was a red sofa against the wall and some other matching chairs plus a huge flat screen TV hanging on the wall facing the bed. You had to admit, he had good taste but he was still insane.

As you sat down on the bed, Baekhyun reached into his draw to pull out a t-shirt and handed it to you with a wide smile, but you raised a brow at the fabric.

"No pants?" You asked.

Baekhyun chuckled, "What for?"

"Because of creeps like you." You grumbled and snatched the shirt that dangled in front of your face before storming off into the connected bathroom. Inside, you could hear Baekhyuns annoying laugh and ignored it, changing into the surprisingly very oversized shirt that went down to your mid thigh.

Taking the clothes you wore earlier, you went back into the room where Baekhyun laid peacefully on the bed, waiting for you.

He only had his boxers on which made you groan in anger and decided to not lay on the bed and instead on the couch near it.

"Princess, what are you doing?" He perched himself on his elbows, watching you throw your clothes on the ground then take the folded blanket on the couch and wrap yourself with it as you laid down.

"Going to sleep, master." You stated coldly with a glare.

Baekhyun rolled his eyes, "Get over here." He said, voice low and laced with dominance but you remained still, closing your eyes and pretending as if you were asleep. "Y/n." He warned but there was no reply.

"Thats it." You heard him get up and march to where you laid. Baekhyun picked you up and you yelped at the sudden intrusion and were thrown over his shoulder.

Smacking his back got you nowhere as he threw you down on the bed, pinning both your hands down and hovered over you with a killing look, "Next time you don't listen, ill bend you over my knee."

"Youre all talk, no action." In an instant you were flipped over and a hand landed straight on your bare ass, leaving you shocked and mouth agape.

"Are you sure, kitten? Would you like me to spank you again?"

"N-no."

"No what?"

"N-no master.."

Baekhyun slowly let you go and laid beside you, still a bit irrated. "Now go to sleep."

You couldnt. Not with the lingering fear of what could happen next. Plus, not with his arm wrapped around your waist with a somewhat tight hold. You were just too scared to let your gaurd down. Why shouldn't you be scared though? What if he took advantage of your sleeping body and did something terrible.

There was no way you could get rest now. You could now count this as your fifth day without proper sleep.