#i laughed out loud when i read that sentence
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pandapetals · 2 days ago
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Shits and Giggles
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You and Logan get drunk together and get caught by Xavier.
professor logan howlett x professor fem!reader - established relationship (y'all married), cute, fluff, teasing, no y/n used, no reader description, your an english professor, logan is a history professor - imagine days of future past logan with the white streaks in his hair
read on ao3 or find more parts for the series: here
“I’ve lost count of how many I’ve had,” you giggled, waving the half-empty beer bottle in your hand like it was some kind of trophy. The world felt a little off-kilter, the living room spinning just slightly as you leaned against Logan on the couch.
Logan, slouched back with his legs stretched out and another empty bottle at his feet, glanced over at you, his lips curling into a lopsided grin. “Sweetheart,” he slurred, his words tinged with a hiccup, “I think we both gave up on countin' somewhere between… hell, I don’t even know.”
You snorted, dissolving into another fit of laughter that made your shoulders shake. “Between 'hell' and 'I don’t even know,'” you echoed, the absurdity of it striking you as the funniest thing in the world. “That’s gotta be at least… five?”
Logan chuckled, shaking his head as he reached for another bottle on the coffee table, nearly knocking over a half-eaten bowl of pretzels in the process. “Five? Try ten,” he shot back, popping the cap off with a quick twist of his wrist. “You’re lightweight compared to me.” He took a swig, then glanced sideways at you, a mischievous twinkle in his eye. “Remember when you tried to out-drink me that one time?”
You burst into laughter again, nearly spilling your drink. “Oh my God, yes! I thought I could handle whiskey,” you said, still giggling as you shook your head. “And then I ended up singing 'Bohemian Rhapsody' on the pool table.”
Logan snorted, his deep laugh rumbling in his chest. “Yeah, you were ‘Galileo’-ing so hard, I thought you were gonna fall off.” He pointed at you with the neck of his beer bottle, his grin widening. “I’ve never seen anyone get that passionate about Freddie Mercury.”
“Well,” you said, trying to compose yourself but failing as another hiccup escaped, “Freddie Mercury is worth the passion.”
You both dissolved into another round of laughter, so loud that the quiet mansion seemed to echo with it, the kind of laughter that left your sides hurting and tears forming at the corners of your eyes. It felt like the whole world had shrunk down to just the two of you—your private little universe of bad jokes and too many drinks.
Logan wiped a tear from the corner of his eye, still chuckling. “We gotta be the loudest drunks in history,” he murmured, his voice low and amused. “Pretty sure we just woke up half the neighborhood.”
“Hey, it’s not our fault the living room has such good acoustics,” you said, hiccuping again, then letting out a laugh that quickly turned into a snort. “Plus, if the mansion was really soundproof like Xavier claims, we’d be fine.”
As if on cue, Xavier wheeled in, looking every bit the stern headmaster despite the lateness of the hour. His brows were raised in a mixture of amusement and disapproval. “And what, may I ask, is the cause of all this ruckus?” he said, his voice calm but carrying that unmistakable tone of authority.
You clapped a hand over your mouth, trying—and failing—to stifle your laughter. “Professor!” you said, eyes wide as you tried to sit up straighter. “Uh, we were just… um…”
“Studying the effects of… alcohol on… something,” Logan added, attempting to sound serious but breaking into a grin halfway through the sentence. “Purely scientific. For… education.”
Xavier sighed, shaking his head as he looked between the two of you. “At this hour? In the middle of the living room?” His lips quirked slightly like he was fighting the urge to smile. “You do realize there are other people in this mansion who require sleep?”
You bit your lip, trying to look contrite but still giggling. “Sorry, Professor,” you said, though your voice wobbled with barely contained laughter. “We’ll keep it down. Pinky promise.” You held up your little finger as if to seal the deal.
Logan glanced at you, then back at Xavier, and without missing a beat, extended his own pinky in a solemn gesture. “Swear on it,” he said, the grin still tugging at his lips.
Xavier shook his head again, a hint of a smile breaking through his stern expression. “I suppose I’ll let it slide this time,” he said, turning his chair toward the door. “But if I hear another rendition of 'Bohemian Rhapsody,' you’ll be on kitchen duty for the rest of the month.”
As soon as he left the room, you and Logan exchanged a look before breaking into laughter all over again, doubling over as you clinked your bottles together. “Kitchen duty,” you gasped, wiping tears from your eyes. “I can’t even make toast without setting off the smoke alarm.”
Logan’s deep laughter echoed through the room once more as he reached over to pull you closer, his arm slipping around your shoulders. “Guess that’s one more reason to behave,” he said, his voice still rough with amusement. “But I gotta admit, darlin’, there’s nobody I’d rather get scolded with.”
You leaned into him, resting your head on his shoulder as the laughter finally started to die down, leaving a warm, fuzzy contentment in its wake. “Likewise,” you murmured, your voice softened by the alcohol and the comfort of his warmth. “We really are a bad influence on each other, huh?”
Logan chuckled, his fingers gently brushing through your hair. “Maybe,” he said quietly, “but I’d say we’re a damn good time.”
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dodger-chan · 3 months ago
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The power of masters and men became more evenly balanced; and now the battle is pretty fairly waged between us.
Oh, I bet you think that, Mr. Thornton. Wouldn't do for the laborers to have things like rights, would it?
Though, honestly, both his and Margaret's perspective on the working class is... dated? I guess? Is a nice way to put it. The Hales are not rich, but they clearly don't fall into the category of "the poor" in Margaret's perspective.
I'm not sure if any of that will be relevant to the focus of the story Gaskell's telling, but Marx published The Communist Manifesto only a few years before this book was written (1848 vs 1854-55).
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welcometoteyvat · 10 months ago
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waterborne poetry you will always be famous
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jyuanka · 2 years ago
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"his lips tasted like ice and sin"
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#so ive been reading this mega popular super long fic for a fandom i dont care about for a ship i dont care about (a procrastination method)#anyway ive read too much of it and felt obligated to keep going but i disliked it more with each chapter#coming at it from an emotional distance helped make it something of a mental writing exercise: pull it apart see why and how it works#my envious little writer heart just wants to know (i mean the stats on this bitch were rising in real time)#but i come upon the above sentence and i let out the ugliest laugh#i stop reading the fic just to process the silliness of what i just read#cue later i reopen the tab and my eyes instantly land on that sentence#suffice to say today i am free of that fic#its on me i shouldve stopped reading when the love interest was described as a 'fallen angel of death'#and its like the writer instantly realized what she's done so the next paragraph immediately starts with 'it was a cliche'#yeah girl it is#(love it when an author leaves their mental self-negotiations over a writing choice right there in the published text)#my decision to stop reading even tho im past the halfway point means i no longer have to read about eyebrows 'quirking inquisitively'#altho sometimes the eyebrow quirks questioningly; often curiously; one time it quirked disapprovingly; but its always quirking & so are lip#and people 'roll their jaws' (no i dont know what that means)#its a fanfic so im fine if the love interest smells like 'oakmoss and papyrus' (sillier scents have been sniffed on love interests)#but if you tell me he smells that way more than 7 times in the span of a few chapters i start having objections#given how many times it was mentioned i started wondering if its plot relevant (its not)#i have so many more thoughts but i like writing in the tags because its the tumblr equivalent of muttering out loud to myself#you might ask 'jyu why are you shredding someone else's work' the answer can be found in the words of contemporary philosopher lil nas x:#'i wanna fuck the ones i envy'
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zabiume · 2 months ago
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pitting rukia and orihime against each other will always fail with me because i genuinely think they're two of the best girls in shonen, but i love it when people try to do it in fanfic, because there was this one story i read ages ago where the author implied that, in-universe, girls desired rukia whereas boys desired orihime, which is very funny to say about a character who a canon lesbian has a crush on, who has more female friends, and whose most popular ship after ulquihime is tatsuhime. like. i am sorry but orihime is kissing different girls on the mouth bi-weekly, she is fruity as hell.
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pepperyduck · 24 days ago
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this is love ft. kento nanami
a/n: a few sappy slices of life with my main man :3 enjoy as i dig up motivation to finish kinktober. 18+ mdni!
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"honey?" kento's voice is muffled through the door as he calls out to you, "everything okay?" the door rattles as he tries to open it, knob jingling.
"uhm, yeah! everything's fine!" you nervously shout, much too loud, and rush to unplug the iron that had melted your husband's favorite shirt. you panic and yelp when the hot iron scorches the side on your hand, throwing the stupid device to the ground in a clatter.
"why is the door locked—are you okay?" he asks, voice becoming more concerned as he hears the movement inside.
"i'm—i'm fine! promise! just give me a minute!" you're rushing into your shared master bathroom to run cold water over your hand, and kento’s using a screwdriver pulled from thin air to break into your bedroom. tears well in your eyes when you catch the sight of kento seeing his favorite shirt burnt and melted to his own ironing board. "i’m so sorry…"
in reality, he doesn’t care about the shirt—he’s already at your side to inspect your burnt hand. after a few seconds, he speaks.
"did you try to iron my shirt for me?" nanami asks, a small smile on his face, "you didn’t have to do that." he turns off the faucet and takes a small towel to dry your hand off.
"i tried to, i’m sorry—i didn’t know it would do that." you apologize, looking down at the cold tile flooring in defeat.
"oh, honey." he coos, "it’s only a shirt."
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"have you seen your father?" you ask your son, yū, who’s sat at the dining table, eating breakfast. he shakes his head no, and when you look at your daughter, mayu, she does the same.
"jeez," you grumble to yourself, bedroom slippers pattering down the hallway as you go to search for your husband. saturday mornings were his time to sleep in, but realistically, he never slept past 9am. and currently, it was nearing 10am.
you check everywhere. he isn’t found in the bedroom, living room, his office, the garage, the patio or in the little garden he kept. upstairs, downstairs, everywhere, he isn’t there. and when you check in your bedroom for the last time, you hear a soft buzzing coming from the bathroom. upon entering, you see your husband bent over the counter, leaning close in the mirror as he shaves his stubble with an electric razor.
"there you are—when did you get that?"
kento had always been a clean shaven kind of man, going to a barber shop once every two weeks for his straight razor shave. it hadn’t even crossed your mind he didn’t go after work yesterday.
but when he looks at you—you burst out laughing. he’d shaven most of his beard off, but a few fuzzy patches remained on his cheeks, along with a mustache grazing his upper lip. peach fuzz and a few knicks litter his chin. this was the first time you’d seen him unable to do anything perfectly. and he looks ridiculous.
"is it really that bad?" he groans, pouting when you wrap your arms around yourself in a giggling fit. you shake your head, although your unforgiving laughs are a testament to the opposite.
"no—no, let me help," you say after calming down.
after gathering a new razor and some shaving cream, you sit atop the counter and your husband stands between your legs. kento is surprised how flawlessly you shave his face, without creating any more marks or cuts. you giggle and kiss him, getting some shaving cream on your face.
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"ken?" you shout from the kitchen, where you’re sat, working on your dissertation. it’s been a long road of blood, sweat, and many, many tears; but you’re finally getting towards the end. about to earn a doctorate.
"yes, darling?" kento replies, walking into the kitchen on queue, his timing impeccable.
"can you read over this paragraph, please?" you kindly ask of him, pointing to your most recent written paragraph. he leans over you, planting one firm palm on the table, the other on your back; his eyes read along the sentences and his fingers tap along your spine.
"ah," his finger becomes more focused on a certain word, "wrong 'there', honey."
"no it's not..." you instantly retort, squinting your tired eyes to read over your writing. and you're right, it was the correct one the first time. this was his version of teasing you. but kento couldn't keep up the face much longer before he's giving in with a shit-eating grin you didn't see that often. "you're funny." you groan as kento stands back up.
after reading over the paragraph for about the nineteenth time, you notice kento silently slipping you some tea before turning back around to keep himself busy with cleaning. you absentmindedly take a few sips, then some more...and you find yourself becoming more and more sleepy...
and you're out like a light, forehead pressed directly against the table as a puddle of drool forms on the papers below. kento already has a warm blanket straight from the dryer to drape over you, and you stir just enough to get comfy on your arms.
kento knows that his back will hurt in the morning, but he sits around the corner of the table next to you, settling his head into his arms to drift off to sleep alongside you.
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music of your taste plays rather quietly in the kitchen. you stir the pot of soup and inhale the flavorful aroma that wafts through the air.
kento sets two bowls next to the stove, then rummages through your silverware drawer to find two spoons. the kids are at their grandparents for the weekend, it's only you and your husband, converted into the duo you were long ago.
you step away from the stove to go fill up two glasses of wine, the brand kento had as his favorite had slowly turned into your favorite over time, too.
kento fills up the two bowls to the brim of the delicious food, grinning on the inside at the simplicity of it all. just you and him. he lids the pot with the matching glass top and makes his way over to the table.
you set out place mats for the both of you, then place the wine glasses in their prospective areas. kento places the bowls on top of the mats as you grab the spoons from the counter.
in the kitchen, your bodies subconsciously dance around each other. carefully, in perfect tune and pace. delicate steps of a routine formed over so much time together.
in the universe, your souls are tied, striding alongside one another in each lifetime repeated.
and this, is love.
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mattsmunch · 1 month ago
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── 𖦹 ! pretty when you cry - c.s
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MEAN!chris sturniolo x CRYBABY!femreader
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✎: "take it just— fuck…just like that…your pussy was fucking made f’me"
ᝰ.ᐟ WC: 7k
⚠︎: SMUT!, established relationship, mean!chris x crybaby!reader, alcohol usage, unprotected p in v (no bueno), fingering, oral (f!receiving), PETNAMES ( baby, ma, sweet girl, & big girl is used like twice but not necessarily as a pet name pls spare me😓) +++ so much more.
⟢ REQUESTED?: yes! in this ask.
⟢ AUTHORS NOTE: THIS IS AN ORIGINAL STORYLINE. i DONT allow any copying, "inspiration" or plagiarism. NOT proof read, sorry for any typos :,)
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ᝰ.ᐟ
chris was pissed.
not only had you ditched lunch plans with him to go shopping with nick and madison, but it was now 7:21pm and he was sat in the passenger seat of matts car reading off directions to your current location.
while you started off the day with plans for a simple shopping spree, Nick and Madison quickly turned the trip into a "two girls and a gay" extravaganza. despite your initial reluctance, the combined power of Madison's fluttering eyelashes and Nick's charm convinced you to join in on their mimosafest. by the fourth glass, you were already feeling a bit fuzzy, but then Nick reminded you of his and Madison’s upcoming month-long tour. that was the final nail in the coffin—you knew you wouldn’t survive that long without your bestie trio.
the decision to join in on the club night with Nick and Madison had led you here, four hours and countless drinks later. you had lost track of everything—how many drinks each of you had, or even what they were. all you knew was that the alcohol coursing through your veins was making you want to dance. with a bit of persuasive coaxing, you managed to drag both Nick and Madison out onto the dance floor. you three let your bodies move to the beat of the music, laughing and squealing as random girls joined in on your carefree dance party.
caught up in the laughter and music, you had completely forgotten about notifying Chris of your plans to go clubbing. in fact, you weren’t even sure if you still had your phone, or if it was tucked away somewhere in the uber you used to get here.
feeling regret bubbling up in your gut, knowing that not letting Chris know about your plans to party was a mistake that’d bite you in the ass later but the alcohol coursing through your veins quickly did an excellent job at putting your worries at bay.
as you danced with complete abandon, Chris was positively seething. Matt couldn’t help but glance at his brother every so often, concern etched on his face. Chris was gritting his teeth, his hand gripping his phone so tightly that his knuckles had turned white.
Matt tried to keep a light atmosphere in the car, his voice strained as he attempted to crack a few jokes. however, knowing that his brother’s mood and behavior were all directed towards you, made the air in the car thick with tension.
Matt and Chris hopped out of the car and hurried to the front of the line, explaining to the bouncer that they didn't intend to stay in the club but just wanted to pick up Chris's girlfriend, his brother, and their friend. once granted entry, Chris instantly started searching the club for you, weaving through flashing lights, loud music, and drunken people bumping into him, each interaction adding to his growing irritation. he clenched his jaw so tightly, his teeth began to ache.
Chris’s eyes were laser-focused as he walked around, scanning the sea of dancers in the hopes of spotting you. the mixture of frustration, worry, and anxiety only fueled his determination to find you as quickly as possible.
Chris and Matt forcefully pushed throught the crowd, making their way to where you and Madison were dancing. when Madison saw Chris approach, she stopped mid-sentence, quickly giving you a nudge to turn around. upon seeing Chris, your initial look of confusion morphed into a wide grin.
"CHRIS!!!!" you squealed with excitement, intoxicated and oblivious to his angry demeanor. you threw yourself into his arms, your body pressed against his.
Chris’s jaw ticked as he caught you, his arms wrapping around your waist in an almost possessive manner. he felt relieved to have found you, but his anger was still present. he leaned down to speak into your ear so you could hear him over the music.
"come on." Chris muttered, his voice low and firm. he gently but firmly guided you and Madison toward the exit, his grip on your waist keeping you close to his side.
as Chris navigated you and Madison through the club, Matt trailed behind them, struggling to keep a stumbling Nick in tow. Matt firmly grabbed onto Nick's arm, tugging him along with them as they all exited the club.
the cold night air hit you, a sharp contrast to the warm and crowded environment of the club. Chris's grip on your waist didn't loosen as he led you to the waiting car where Matt had managed to steer Nick into the backseat.
Chris opened the back door of the car, his gaze locked onto yours as he helped you into the seat. you stumbled slightly in your intoxicated state, but he steered you into the middle, making room for Madison and Nick to sit on either side.
meanwhile, Matt was wrestling with a giggling Nick in the backseat, struggling to keep him still as he attempted to buckle his seatbelt.
once you were both settled in the middle, Chris shut the door behind you before making his way to the passenger seat in the front. Matt finally managed to secure a giggling Nick in place, and quickly rounded the car to get into the driver's seat himself.
the atmosphere in the car was tense, the silence punctuated only by the occasional burst of laughter from Nick. Chris sat in the passenger seat, his jaw still clenched and his eyes fixed on you through the rearview mirror. Matt started the car, ready to pull out and head home.
with your mind slightly clouded by alcohol, you feel a wave of clingy neediness wash over you. You’re not fully aware of Chris’s anger towards you, and all you want is to be close to him and receive attention. you lean forward, awkwardly wrapping your arms around his arm, snuggling up to him and nuzzling your face against his shoulder, ignoring the way your seatbelt was digging into your torso.
“pssst, Chris,” you whisper loudly into his ear, your breath warm against his skin.
you attempts to get his attention go ignored as Chris stubbornly remains silent. he continues staring straight ahead, ignoring your drunken behavior. you pout in disappointment as Chris continues to give you the cold shoulder, the silence in the car feeling like a dagger. you release your grip on his arm, but your hand continues to rest on his shoulder, drawing small circles.
Chris impatiently shrugs your hand off his shoulder, growing increasingly irritated by your behavior. this causes you to pout further, and you huff in response, leaning back in your seat and sulking.
as a result, you begin babbling to both Nick and Madison, all of you slurring your words due to the copious amounts of alcohol you've consumed.
the three of you talk over each other, laughing loudly and speaking in a mixture of exaggerated tones and drunken mumbles. Chris clenches his jaw tighter in frustration, the noise and your intoxication only worsening his already shitty mood.
Chris's irritation increases with every second that passes, the sound of your drunken laughter grating on the nerves. he glances at you through the rearview mirror every so often, watching as you chatter away to Nick and Madison, seemingly oblivious to his anger.
Matt is focused on the road ahead, occasionally sneaking glances at the three of you through the rearview mirror as he drives the car home. he can sense the tension emanating from Chris and feels the weight of the situation. however, he keeps his focus on getting all five of you back safely without any distractions.
the incessant chattering from the backseat finally pushes Chris over the edge, causing him to snap. he turns around in his seat, his eyes fixed on the three of you in the back.
"bruh can yall shut the fuck up," he snarls, his voice sharp and filled with annoyance. "you’re fuckin annoying me."
silence quickly fills the car as you all snap your mouths shut.
Madison remains calm, slightly surprised by Chris's outburst but choosing not to provoke him further. Nick's sassiness gets the better of him, and he throws a quick retort at Chris, which only serves to irritate him even more.
on the other hand, your sensitivity and intoxication has tears pricking at your eyes in response to Chris's harsh words. you pout and sniffle, hurt by his tone.
as tears stream down your drunken red cheeks, Chris's expression remains stoic, showing no sympathy for you. seeing your emotional reaction only adds fuel to his anger, as he views it as an attempt to manipulate his emotions. his jaw clenches once more, his eyes narrow, and he swiftly turns back around in his seat, staring straight ahead as if refusing to look at you any longer.
still completely ignorant to the anger aimed towards you, radiating off of him, you reach forward and tap Chris’s shoulder, wanting his attention. Chris immediately stiffens at your touch, his jaw muscle twitching with irritation. however, your obliviousness only fuels his frustration. he snaps his head around, his eyes flashing with anger as he glares at you, his voice harsh as he snarls out. "What?"
although you flinch slightly at the sharpness in his tone, you maintain your oblivious demeanor and try to muster up a pouty expression. despite the alcohol clouding your judgment, a small voice inside of you cautions you against pushing his buttons too far, but the liquid courage bubbling in your veins compels you to proceed regardless.
you reach forward and rest your hand on his upper arm, gently tracing your fingers along his bicep as you give him your best puppy dog eyes.
"c’mon, Chris," you murmur, your voice whiny and pleading. "why are you being so mean to me?"
your touch and plea for attention only succeed in infuriating him further. his muscles tense under your fingers, his eyes narrowing as he glares at your drunken, pouting face.
"mean to you? you’re the one who went out and got drunk without letting anyone know," he retorts, his voice laced with irritation. "you could have at least had the decency to send me a goddamn text."
sensing the rising tension between you and Chris, Matt quickly turns up the volume of the music, trying to drown out the conversation happening. the upbeat tune blasts through the speakers, drawing the attention of both Nick and Madison, who begin to bob their heads to the beat.
with the music cranked up, your conversation with Chris becomes less audible to the others, but they can still sense the thick atmosphere in the car. Nick and Madison exchange occasional glances, silently listening in while pretending to focus on the music.
you pout your lips in slight indignation, your alcohol-induced brain still not fully comprehending the situation. you look up at him with watery eyes and say, "well, i just wanted to have a good time with Madi and Nick. you’re so boring, never wanting to go out with us."
for a moment, Chris’s irritation morphs into disbelief, his eyebrows rising slightly at your audacity. He snorts sarcastically before retorting, "boring? you call me boring but then pull a stunt like this. real mature."
your mouth opens and closes repeatedly, struggling to form a coherent response to his comment. you’re too inebriated to realize that your actions tonight are anything but mature. the alcohol has rendered you emotionally vulnerable and childish, and your words start to sound more like a desperate plea rather than a valid argument.
"i just wanted to have fun," you repeat, your voice bordering on a whine. "why are you always so serious? i can take care of myself, y'know."
after your reply, Chris looks at you for a moment, his expression a mix of frustration and disbelief. He shakes his head, unable to believe the level of immaturity you're displaying.
as the rest of the car ride passes in relative silence, you, Nick, and Madison slowly start to drift off to sleep in the back seat, the alcohol and exhaustion from the night finally taking their toll.
Matt pulls the car into the driveway, the engine purring to a stop. Nick, roused by the car coming to a halt, wakes up with a disoriented groan. he clambers out of the backseat, his movements clumsy and disoriented as the alcohol still affects his motor skills.
Matt quickly gets out of the car and aids Madison in getting out, guiding her toward the house. meanwhile, Chris grudgingly exits the vehicle and assists you, his touch firm but not exactly gentle.
Chris wraps his hand around your upper arm, guiding and steadying you as you stumble out of the car. you’re still half-asleep but conscious enough to recognize his touch. however, even in your exhausted state, you instinctively lean into him, seeking his warmth and comfort, despite the tension between both of you.
Matt guides Madison and Nick to Nick's room as they mutter a slurred "goodnight" before disappearing behind the door. Chris turns his attention to you, his lips pressed into a thin line. he silently leads you into the bedroom, his demeanor remaining stoic and distant.
once inside, he silently helps you undress, carefully removing your clothes in a detached but efficient manner.
as Chris helps you undress, the alcohol in your system loosens your tongue, and you start to babble in a sleepy, slurred voice.
"missed you s’much today." you sigh, pouting slightly, your eyes half-lidded.
however, Chris remains largely unresponsive, his jaw clenched as he focuses on getting you into something comfortable to sleep in. ignored, your pout deepens, and you let out a small whine.
you continue to pout, frustration mounting within you at Chris's lack of response. you look up at him, your bottom lip jutted out in an exaggerated pout. With an air of drunken petulance, you whine again.
"why won't you talk to me? i said i missed you."
once more, Chris continues to act as if he can't hear your whiney plea. he grabs a soft t-shirt from the dresser and gestures for you to lift your arms up so he can slip it over your head.
his expression remains stoic, giving no hint of whether he's actively ignoring you or simply too focused on getting you comfortable for bed.
after helping you into bed and adjusting the covers, Chris stands next to the bed and nods toward you, signaling that he's done. He then mutters, "gonna take a shower."
with that, he turns and walks to the bathroom, disappearing inside and shutting the door behind him.
the alcohol gradually takes effect, and your inhibitions start to slip. as you lie in bed, your mind begins to wander. the physical absence of Chris, combined with your intoxicated state, starts to awaken a more primal part of you.
a feeling of desire and neediness starts to bubble within you. you find yourself craving his touch, his voice, his presence. your thoughts start to turn down a more sultry and suggestive path.
your mind starts to paint vivid images as you think of Chris in the shower. you imagine the water cascading down his muscled body, the steam clinging to his skin, and the towel hanging around his hips.
the thought alone sends a wave of heat through your body, your pulse quickening at the mental image playing out in your mind. your cheeks flush as your imagination runs wild.
the vivid imagery and growing arousal only intensify as your drunken mind continues to wander. your hand slowly trails down your body, fingertips grazing over the swell of your breasts before dipping lower, teasing along the waistband of your panties.
you squirm against the sheets, aching for more contact. a soft moan escapes your lips as you picture Chris stepping out of the shower, droplets of water glistening on his torso. in your mind's eye, he catches you staring and smirks knowingly, letting the towel drop to the floor.
lost in the fantasy, your fingers slip beneath the fabric, seeking relief from the building heat between your thighs. you arch into your own touch, breath coming faster now as you lose yourself to the sensations and forbidden imaginings of your boyfriend.
with trembling fingers, you slide your panties down, exposing your slick folds to the cool air of the room. your breathing grows ragged as you delve two digits inside yourself, curling them to stroke that sensitive spot deep within. soft, drunken moans spill from your parted lips, echoing in the quiet of the night.
as you pleasure yourself, the distant sound of the shower stills, replaced by the creak of the bathroom door opening. water droplets from Chris' damp skin sparkle in the dim light as he pads silently towards the bed, his eyes locked onto the intimate scene unfolding before him.
your pulse races at being caught in such a compromising position, but instead of pulling away, you continue to touch yourself shamelessly, lost in the throes of desire.
Chris stands at the foot of the bed, the towel draped low around his hips, barely covering the prominent bulge straining against the fabric. His piercing gaze is fixed intently on the erotic display before him - your slender fingers dancing across your sensitive flesh, coaxing pleasure from your quivering core.
"please, Chris," you whimper, your voice thick with lust, "touch me... i need you..." but he remains motionless, simply observing your desperate pleas with an unreadable expression.
undeterred, you bring your other hand up to join the first, frantically rubbing your swollen clit in tight circles. your back arches off the mattress, a keening moan ripping from your throat as the tension builds. Chris' eyes never leave your face, drinking in every gasp, every shudder, every plea for release.
Chris sinks down beside you on the bed, his movements deliberate and controlled. he reaches out, his palm cool against your inner thigh, gently but firmly parting your legs wider apart. you tremble under his touch, a mix of nervousness and anticipation coursing through you.
without a word, he settles himself between your splayed legs, his face mere inches from your dripping cunt. the intoxicating scent of your arousal fills his nostrils as he leans in closer, his warm breath ghosting over your most intimate area. your fingers slow their frantic pace, almost ceasing movement altogether as you await his next action, heart pounding in your chest.
as Chris's face hovers tantalizingly close, you instinctively shift your hands, trying to draw him in, to capture his mouth against your aching clit. but he forestalls your advance, his strong grip closing around your hips, halting your movement.
"no, keep going," he commands harshly, his voice low and authoritative. his words send a thrill through you.
obediently, you resume stroking your clit, your fingers moving in time with the rapid beat of your heart. Chris watches intently, his dark eyes burning with an unspoken hunger as he drinks in the sight of you pleasuring yourself under his stern instruction. the contrast between his commanding demeanor and the vulnerability of your act only heightens the intensity of the moment.
despite your best efforts, the pressure builds to a crescendo, your climax hovering just out of reach. Frustrated and needy, you plead with Chris, "please, i need you..."
but he merely scoffs, a cruel smile playing on his lips as he mocks your words from earlier "you can take care of yourself ma."
your frustration mounts as you struggle to reach completion, your small hands inadequate to satisfy the intense ache pulsing through you. tears of desperation prick at the corners of your eyes as you writhe beneath Chris' watchful gaze.
"please…" you whimper, your voice raw with need. "i can't... i need you to make me come."
Chris' smirk only widens at your pitiful pleas, clearly enjoying the power he holds over you. "what's wrong, baby? can't handle taking care of yourself like a big girl?" he taunts, his tone dripping with condescension.
tears stream down your face as you shake your head frantically, too far gone to care about preserving any semblance of pride. the effects of the alcohol in your system slowly dissipating as your body grows hungrier for his touch. "no, please... m’sorry— need you so badly."
Chris' eyes narrow as he takes in your tear-streaked face, your desperate pleas hanging heavy in the air between you. for a long moment, he simply stares, his expression inscrutable. then, without warning, he surges forward, his mouth crashing against your dripping cunt in a brutal kiss.
a strangled cry tears from your throat at the sudden contact, your hips bucking involuntarily against his face. his tongue delves deep, lapping at your essence greedily as he feasts upon you. the stubble of his chin scrapes deliciously against your sensitive flesh, adding a new dimension to the overwhelming sensations consuming you.
your hands fly to his hair, tangling in the damp strands as you hold him in place, afraid he might pull away.
Chris devours you with a ferocity that borders on punishing, his tongue lashing against your sensitive nub with ruthless precision. each flick and swirl sends shockwaves of pleasure rippling through your body, pushing you closer and closer to the edge.
your fingers tighten their grip on his hair, nails scraping against his scalp as you grind yourself shamelessly against his face. broken moans and incoherent pleas tumble from your lips, lost in the haze of ecstasy that threatens to consume you whole.
just as you teeter on the brink of oblivion, Chris pulls away abruptly, leaving you bereft and wanting. you whine in protest, your hips jerking upwards in a futile attempt to recapture his touch. he chuckles darkly, his breath hot against your swollen clit.
"not yet, ma,"
Chris continues his relentless assault, his tongue delving deeper into your heated core. every lick, every swirl brings you closer to the precipice, each wave of pleasure building upon the last until you're left gasping and writhing beneath him.
his fingers find your swollen clit, pinning it against his thumb as he begins to circle the sensitive nub mercilessly. a choked sob escapes your lips as the dual assault of his mouth and hand pushes you further than you've ever been before.
your orgasm crashes over you like a tidal wave, your body convulsing as waves of pleasure ripple through your core. your cries echo throughout the room as you ride out the aftershocks, completely spent and utterly satisfied.
before you can even catch your breath, Chris is on you again, his mouth descending upon your sensitive flesh once more. the sensation is almost too much to bear, your oversensitive skin crying out in protest even as your body betrays you, craving more.
he laps at your essence hungrily, his tongue delving deep into your fluttering walls as if seeking to claim every last drop. your hands fist in the sheets, your knuckles turning white as you clench the fabric, anchoring yourself against the overwhelming tide of sensation.
Chris' fingers join the fray, two digits plunging into your slick heat as he curls them just right, hitting that sweet spot within you that makes stars explode behind your eyelids. your hips buck wildly, meeting his thrusts with abandon as you chase another peak, another shattering release.
lost in a haze of pleasure, you find yourself unable to form coherent words. all that escapes your lips are broken moans and garbled pleas, your mind too focused on the exquisite sensations radiating from your core to string together a proper sentence.
as Chris works you towards another earth-shattering orgasm, your body arches off the bed, your back bowing as you surrender yourself fully to the overwhelming ecstasy. your thighs quiver, your muscles tensing as the coil within you winds tighter and tighter, ready to snap at any moment.
with a final, brutal thrust of his fingers and a hard suckle of your clit, Chris sends you hurtling over the edge once more. your vision whites out, your world narrowing down to the singular point where his mouth meets your cunt as you come undone beneath him, screaming his name like a prayer.
as the last tremors of your orgasm fade, Chris suddenly sits up. before you can voice your disappointment, his palm connects sharply with your sensitive mound, sending a jolt of painful pleasure racing up your spine.
the unexpected sting has you gasping, your eyes flying open wide as you stare up at Chris in shock. He grins wickedly down at you, clearly relishing the effect his actions have had on you. by this point your absolutely positive any trace of alcohol in your system has been completely fucked out.
without warning, he shifts your limp, satiated body effortlessly, maneuvering you onto his lap as he leans back against the headboard. His throbbing cock presses insistently against your thigh through the towel, a reminder of his own pent-up desire.
Chris settles you comfortably in his lap, his strong arms encircling your waist as he holds you close. you can feel the heat of his skin seeping into yours, his heart beating a steady rhythm beneath your cheek. for a moment, you allow yourself to relax into his embrace, savoring the intimacy of the moment.
then, slowly, teasingly, Chris begins to rock his hips, grinding his still-clothed erection against your sensitive folds. the friction sends sparks of pleasure dancing along your nerve endings, reigniting the fire within you despite your exhaustion.
his hands roam your body possessively, mapping every curve and hollow as if committing you to memory. he lifts your shirt up slightly and dips his head, capturing one pert nipple between his teeth and tugging gently, drawing a sharp gasp from your lips.
"look at you," he mocks, his tone dripping with desire and sarcasm.
Chris chuckles low in his throat, the sound sending vibrations through your chest as he continues to toy with your nipples, alternating between gentle tugs and soft bites.
“acting like such a big girl, blowing me off all day without so much as a text. and now, here you are, practically begging for my attention."
his words should offend you, but instead, they only serve to stoke the flames of your neediness. you squirm in his lap, your hips rolling instinctively against his clothed arousal as you seek relief from the ache building within you.
"you're such a needy little thing, aren't you?" Chris taunts.
your cheeks flush with a mix of embarrassment and arousal at Chris' mocking words. despite the teasing, you can't deny the truth in his statement - you did blow him off today, and now you're practically climbing his body in an attempt to satisfy the gnawing hunger within you.
"i...i forgot..." you start to defend yourself, but the words trail off as Chris' fingers find your sensitive clit, circling the swollen bud with maddening slowness. a whimper escapes your lips, your hips bucking involuntarily into his touch.
"you..you forgot what, ma?" Chris prompts, his voice a low purr as he mocks your stuttering.
"i-i was just hanging out with Nick and Madison," you stammer, trying to focus on the conversation despite the intense stimulation Chris is providing. "we got caught up talking and lost track of time. i didn't mean to ignore you!"
Chris listens patiently, his expression unreadable as he allows you to explain yourself. but then, with a sudden movement, he tugs the towel loose from under him, letting it fall away to reveal his fully erect cock standing proudly at attention.
the sight takes your breath away, and for a moment, you forget all about your excuses, your gaze fixated on the thick length of him. Chris smirks knowingly, his free hand stroking himself lazily as he waits for you to continue.
you lean in, your intention clear as you reach for Chris' impressive erection. but before your fingers can make contact, his hand shoots out, slapping yours away with a firm "nuh uh."
he punctuates the denial with a mocking kiss of his teeth, a frown falls onto your face.
Chris' grip tightens around your wrist, holding your hand captive in his lap as he looks at you with a mixture of amusement and sternness.
Chris releases your wrist only to grasp your chin firmly, tilting your face up to meet his intense gaze. "listen up, because i’m only going to say this once," he says, his voice low and authoritative. "tonight, you put me in a world of shit, worrying about where you were and if you were okay. whole damn time you were just out there living it up, completely unaware of the stress you caused me."
he pauses, studying your reaction before continuing. "let me make one thing crystal clear: i’m in charge here, ma. when you neglect to check in or consider someone else's feelings, you end up in trouble. and right now? you're in a whole lot of it."
Chris' thumb brushes across your lower lip, his touch both soothing and threatening. "so here's what's going to happen."
Chris leans in closer, his breath hot against your ear as he whispers his demands. "first, you're going to apologize properly for putting me through hell tonight. then, you're going to show me just how sorry you really are."
with those words, Chris claims your mouth in a bruising kiss, his tongue delving deep to stake its claim. his hands roam your body possessively, squeezing and kneading every inch of exposed skin until you're writhing in his lap, desperate for more.
Chris breaks the kiss, his chest heaving as he looks down at you with a mix of lust and control. "apologize," he commands, his voice rough with desire.
you swallow hard, your mind racing to process the intensity of the situation. but with Chris' piercing gaze boring into you, you know there's no room for hesitation. "i’m sorry," you begin, your voice trembling slightly. “m’really, really sorry for worrying you and not checking in. it thoughtless and selfish of me..."
as you continue apologizing, Chris starts to stroke himself again, his movements slow and deliberate. each word from your lips seems to spur him on, his cock twitching in anticipation.
your apologies tumble from your lips, tears begin to stream down your face, guilt overwhelming you. Chris watches impassively, his eyes cold as he listens to your words. suddenly, he cuts you off mid-sentence, feigning sympathy as he pulls you into a brief, patronizing hug.
"oh, poor baby," he coos mockingly. "you feel so bad, don't you sweet girl? gonna make it up me, hm?"
before you can respond, Chris grabs your hips roughly and positions you over his throbbing cock. With no warning whatsoever, he slams you down onto him, burying himself to the hilt in one brutal thrust. the sudden intrusion steals the air from your lungs, pain and pleasure mingling in a dizzying rush.
your fingers dig into Chris' shoulders as he buries himself inside you, the sensation overwhelming. "wait!" you gasp, trying to halt his movements. "t—..too much…"
“ ‘too much’ too fucking bad, i don’t care. take it.” he mocks you as his hands grip your hips tightly as he grinds you down onto him. the pain is almost unbearable, but mixed with the pleasure, it feels incredibly good. you try to push back against him, but his hold is unyielding, leaving you trapped beneath his powerful frame.
Chris holds you steady, his pace relentless as he pounds into you with increasing force. the sound of skin slapping against skin fills the room, punctuated by your muffled cries and his guttural groans.
despite your initial protests, your body begins to adapt, craving the intense friction and fullness Chris provides. you arch your back, meeting each thrust with a desperate grind of your own, the pleasure building rapidly within you.
"fuck, look at you," Chris growls, his eyes dark with lust as he watches you take him. "love seeing you get used to my cock, y/n.”
your body betrays you, responding to Chris' dominant thrusts with a growing need for more. the pain has transformed into a sharp, delicious ache, fueling the rising heat between your thighs.
"please..." you whimper, as your hips move instinctively to meet his, seeking that perfect angle for maximum pleasure. tears still streak your face, but they're tinged with a strange, exhilarating mix of shame and arousal.
"that’s it, baby," he encourages, his voice dripping with satisfaction. "take it just— fuck…just like that…your pussy was fucking made f’me”
chris continues to pound into you mercilessly, his rhythm unrelenting. each thrust pushes you closer to the edge, the pressure building relentlessly within you.
your walls clench around him involuntarily, your body betraying your resistance. despite your earlier pleas, you find yourself pushing back against him eagerly now, desperate for release.
"fuck yeah," Chris groans in approval, feeling your tight walls quiver and spasm around his cock. "fucking love seeing you squirm on my dick.”
Chris' grip on your hips tightens to the point of pain as he increases his tempo, each thrust driving deeper and harder than before. his breath comes in harsh pants, his face twisted in a mask of raw, animalistic lust.
"you wanted this, didn't you?" he snarls, his voice dripping with cruel mockery. "wanted me to fuck you senseless, make you cum all over my cock?"
his words cut through the haze of pleasure, striking a nerve even as your body continues to respond eagerly to his brutal assault. a part of you recoils at the degrading language, but another part, darker and more primal, craves the domination, the complete loss of control.
Chris leans in close, his lips brushing against your ear as he whispers, "this is what happens when you forget your place, ma. when you think you can run wild and free, without considering the consequences."
he punctuates his words with a particularly vicious thrust, grinding his pelvis against yours. the movement sends shockwaves of pleasure-pain through your core, drawing a choked moan from your throat.
"that's right, let me hear you," Chris taunts, his voice a sinful purr. "moan for me, baby. let everyone know who owns this pussy."
Chris doesn't bother to quiet his increasingly loud grunts and groans, fully aware that anyone nearby could likely hear the lewd sounds of his dominance.
"fuck, you're so goddamn tight," he growls, his hips snapping against yours with ruthless precision. "gonna ruin this cunt for anyone else, make sure you never forget who you belong to."
the sheer audacity of his declaration, coupled with the brutal intensity of his thrusts, leaves you breathless and utterly at his mercy. even with the humiliation of being so thoroughly claimed, you can't deny the intoxicating thrill that courses through you, the knowledge that you've been marked, owned, in the most primal way possible.
your voice barely audible over the obscene slap of flesh against flesh. "please, Chris...i can't...it's too much..."
but even as the words leave your lips, your body continues to respond to his relentless pounding, your inner walls fluttering and clenching around his invading length. the conflicting sensations of pain and pleasure swirl together, threatening to consume you entirely.
Chris seems to relish your struggles, his pace never faltering as he drives home his point, his dominance over you absolute. "too much?" he scoffs, his breath hot against your neck. "you wanted this, ma. now you're gonna take it."
without warning, Chris yanks you off his cock and spins you around, forcing you to drop to your hands and knees on the bed. he yanks your hips back, your ass raised high and inviting.
"fucking perfect," he murmurs, running a hand over the curve of your rear possessively. then, with a swift, brutal thrust, he sheathes himself back inside you, stretching you open once more.
Chris sets a punishing rhythm, his hips slapping against your ass as he takes you from behind. the new angle allows him to hit even deeper, the head of his cock battering relentlessly at your cervix with each powerful stroke.
"look at that ass bounce," he pants, his grip on your hips tightening. "so beautiful, taking my cock like a good little slut."
Chris brings his palm down hard on the rounded globe of your ass, the crack of the impact ringing out in the room. a bright red handprint blooms instantly on your tender flesh, marking you as his property.
the sudden sting sends a jolt straight to your core, triggering an intense orgasm that crashes through you without warning. your vision whites out, your entire body shaking as wave after wave of ecstasy consumes you.
but Chris shows no mercy, continuing to pound into you even as you convulse around him, milking his cock with rhythmic spasms. the added stimulation only seems to spur him on, his strokes becoming faster, harder, more frenzied.
"that’s it, cum on my cock like a good little whore," he growls, one hand fisting in your hair as he yanks your head back. "fucking take it."
as the aftershocks of your third orgasm subside, you collapse further into the bed, your mind reeling from the intensity of your orgasm. Chris continues to rut into you with abandon, his movements erratic and driven by his own impending release.
"ahh, f-fuck...so g-good," you stutter, your words tumbling out in a breathless, incoherent stream. "c-can't...can't believe how much...oh god, Chris!"
your body, still sensitive from the brutal fucking, responds to every twitch and throb of his cock inside you. the sensation is almost too much to bear, your nerves stretched taut and singing with pleasure.
Chris grunts, his pace faltering as he nears his peak. "gonna...fuck, gonna fill this pussy up," he gasps, his fingers digging into your hips.
with a final, guttural groan, Chris pulls out of you abruptly, leaving you empty and aching. he flips you over onto your back, looming above you with a predatory gleam in his eyes.
"not done with you yet, ma," he says, his voice low and menacing.
before you can react, he's crawling up your body, his mouth finding yours in a searing kiss. his tongue invades your mouth, claiming you thoroughly as his hands roam over your breasts and stomach.
when he finally breaks the kiss, you're left panting and dazed, your body thrumming with need. Chris smirks down at you, clearly enjoying the power he holds over you.
Chris grips your thighs, spreading them wide as he positions himself between them. his eyes lock onto yours, dark with lust and possession.
"wanna see your pretty face," he growls, his voice thick with desire.
with that, he surges forward, burying himself to the hilt in one powerful thrust. you cry out at the sudden intrusion, your body tensing around him.
Chris starts to move, his hips rolling in a slow, deliberate rhythm. each stroke is deep and purposeful, designed to stretch and claim you completely.
as he picks up speed, his gaze remains fixed on your face, drinking in every expression of pleasure and submission. the intensity of his stare only heightens your arousal, making you feel exposed and vulnerable beneath him.
Chris' thrusts become more urgent, his breathing growing ragged as he chases his release. his hands slide under your thighs, lifting and spreading your legs wider, opening you up completely to his possession.
"you’re mine, y/n," he pants, his voice strained with exertion. "this pussy belongs to me, understand? no one else gets to touch you like this."
his words, combined with the relentless pounding of his cock, push you closer to the edge once more. your body trembles beneath him, teetering on the brink of another shattering climax.
"beg for it," Chris demands, his hips snapping forward with bruising force. "beg me to fill you up, i know you want it."
"p-please, Chris!" you whimper, your voice breaking on a sob. "n-need…need your cum…”
your desperate plea seems to unleash something primal within him. Chris lets out a feral growl, his thrusts becoming savage and unrelenting as he drives towards his climax.
"yes, fuck yes," he snarls, his eyes blazing with raw hunger. "take it all, ma. i know you can do it"
with a final, brutal plunge, Chris buries himself to the hilt inside you. his cock throbs and pulses as he erupts, flooding your depths with his scorching hot release. wave after wave of his essence pumps into you, marking you irrevocably as his.
as Chris' orgasm subsides, he collapses on top of you, his weight pressing you into the mattress. you can feel his heart thundering against your chest, his hot breath fanning over your skin as he tries to catch his breath.
after a long moment, he lifts his head, looking down at you with a mix of satisfaction and possession. "i love you," his voice is soft with a low rumble.
he rolls off you, pulling you into his arms as he settles back against the pillows. despite the exhaustion that threatens to claim you, you find yourself curling into his side, seeking the warmth and security of his embrace.
Chris runs his fingers through your hair, gently brushing the sweat-dampened strands away from your face. there’s a hint of tenderness in his touch, a stark contrast to the rough passion of moments before.
"we’re going to talk about this in the morning kid," he says softly, his tone firm but not unkind. "about you blowing me off, gotta to set some things straight, ma."
despite the gravity of his words, there's no real anger in his voice. instead, there's a sense of determination, a quiet insistence that he won't let this happen again.
for now, though, he simply holds you close, allowing you both to bask in the afterglow of your lovemaking. tomorrow will bring its own challenges, but for tonight, you're content to lose yourself in the comfort of his embrace.
you nod sleepily, already feeling the heaviness of exhaustion pulling you under. Chris tucks you in tighter, his arm a solid barrier across your waist.
" get some rest," he murmurs, planting a soft kiss on your forehead. "sweet dreams my sweet girl"
as his warm breath washes over your skin, you let out a contented sigh, your eyelids drifting shut. the steady beat of Chris' heart and the gentle rise and fall of his chest lull you into a deep, dreamless sleep, unaware of the storm brewing on the horizon.
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AUTHORS NOTE: whoever this cutesy lil anon is, i apologize i literally thought i posted this last night LOLL. i hope this fits ur stands, if not lmk and i’ll write another immediately :,))
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ladadiida · 1 year ago
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𝐩𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 | 𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐣𝐢 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
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𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 as much as you wanted to stay by his side, you couldn't bear the thought of watching him fall in love with other women while you're stuck at the kitchen washing dishes and measuring ingredients. so you dreamt of leaving, of traveling to different islands to share your lovely songs and tunes; but the more your desire to leave grows, the more sanji finds himself drowning in your warmth.
or,
you and sanji over the years, wherein five times you tried to leave him and the one time you finally did, despite his refusal to let you go.
𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬 musician reader, 5 + 1 things, pining, unrequited love, not actually unrequited love, heavy (kind of) angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, angst with a happy ending
𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 HERE IT IS! the response to the sneak peek was crazy, and so i rushed to get this done. i only watched the live action so beware of minor mistakes if you ever saw one. english is also not my first language and you are welcome to correct me anytime for any grammatical errors. title is a lyric from the last time by taylor swift ft. gary lightbody. this fic is also posted in ao3 with its full summary and WITH A BONUS CHAPTER. enjoy reading!
𝐰𝐜 11.3k
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"There you are."
Your soapy, wet hands almost dropped the ceramic plate you were currently washing in the dirty kitchen sink as soon as you heard a familiar smooth and honeyed voice. Abruptly turning off the sink so that the sound of his approaching footsteps were clear to your ears, you wiped the sweat off your forehead with the back of your hand before turning your body towards him.
He was carrying a stack of plates, a fresh batch to add to the pile you had to wash, with an obnoxious yet handsome smile plastered on his lips. You took a deep breath to calm the growing irritation at the bottom of your stomach, reminding yourself that this was your job and you only had a couple of hours to endure until you're free to lock yourself up in your bedroom. You were particularly looking forward to writing today, and the thought of finishing the lyrics to your new song tonight slightly eased your mood. Accepting your fate, you pointed to the remaining space beside the sink.
"Place it there." You told him, albeit begrudgingly as you turn on the sink again and pour more soap on the battered sponge.
You took a mental note to ask Zeff later about buying new sponges, and if you were lucky to catch him in a good mood, you'll put in a request to get the sink fixed and cleaned. Your eyes scanned over the grime and rust around the area. If you were going to spend the rest of your life washing dishes, then you might as well get a proper kitchen sink to do so.
An amused laugh fell out of the golden haired man you grew up with, surprised at your compliance to do the job you hated. The sound nearly sent your poor heart into a dizzying whirlwind of little nuisances called emotions. "What a hardworking woman."
"I could say the same to you. It seems like you have a new record today." You said while you splashed dirtied bowls with soap water, smiling at him teasingly, "Thought you would've been kicked out of the line by now."
"The old man just can't help but to accept the fact that I am a greater cook than him." He smirked, wiping a knife with a dish cloth. Trying not to roll your eyes, you shook your head at his usual display of arrogance, yet you can't help but to grin as you began to hear scratching sounds against the floors.
"Then you better get those chopped carrots ready." You replied, and when you got to finish your sentence, the doors to the kitchen swung open, revealing the head chef.
Zeff's cold and steely eyes immediately landed on the blond. He walked towards him with a fast pace despite only having one leg, his braided mustache bouncing in each step.
"Aye, aye, aye. Why haven't you started on the carrots yet, little eggplant? Can you get any slower?" He scolded, loud enough for the whole staff to hear, but none of them even flinched. You returned back to your plates and glasses, smiling softly. This was part of your routine everyday: to listen in their silly arguments.
However, before the younger chef can reply, you butted in, "Sanji fetched some of the plates for me. Since there's a lunch rush, I couldn't leave the kitchen."
Zeff let out a low hum. You couldn't even see Sanji's face, but you knew him well enough to know that he was smiling triumphantly, knowing that he won this time. After a few minutes of contemplating, the head chef clicked his tongue. "Don't defend him, little lass. But I'll let it slip this time. What are you waiting for, then? Start cutting them!"
"Yes, chef." Sanji answered in a jovial manner, placing the carrots on a chopping board.
Twisting the faucet lever so that the water flow from the sink is gentle and quiet, you then paid attention to their little banters every now and then. You brought up a wine glass and positioned it by your side to try to get a glimpse of the two most important men in your life. Through their reflection on the glass, you can see Zeff hunching over Sanji's knifework, nodding every time the vegetables were correctly sliced.
On the other hand, Sanji was unbothered by the head chef's observations and continued to cut the ingredients calmly. Some of the strands in his hair fell down on one side of his face, covering an eye, and most people would think that it was an unusual way of styling hair; yet it was one thing out of many that you loved the most about him.
You accepted it years ago.
You accepted the fact that you somehow fell in love with Sanji Vinsmoke along your weird journey of working in a sea restaurant full of former pirates and making music while at it. How the pesky feelings grew and wrapped themselves around your aching heart, you didn't know. Maybe it was when he learned to cook your favorite food and gave it to you afterwards, or the way his crystal blue eyes reminded you of snowflakes every winter.
Or maybe it was when he pulled your hair out of jealousy the moment he learned that Zeff would be taking in another child in his care, but brushed it and even braided it after the latter cleared the misunderstanding. Maybe it was when he supported you in your dreams and told you they weren't silly, maybe it was when he fought off drunk men that were trying to hit on you. Or maybe it was the way his voice would drop an octave lower whenever he asks you for a favor. The list could go on and on and you still wouldn't know the reason why. It doesn't matter anyway. You tripped, you fell, and now you're pining.
Drying off the last of the plates, you washed your own hands after and patted them dry on your skirt. You were the last one to leave the kitchen, the other staff already back in their quarters after a long, exhausting day of cooking. You fixed the signature blue bandana tied in your hair then went on your way towards the upper deck.
You weren't blessed with a talent in cooking, so you offered to do chores instead. Washing the dishes, cleaning the restaurant, and doing the laundry were few of the things you do in the Baratie. You can't say that you enjoy it, but you were beyond grateful that Zeff gave you a chance despite his opposition to let a woman work inside his restaurant.
As you were about to go to the newly laundered clothes you hung on a thin wire earlier that morning, you heard two voices speaking. You also smelled cigarette smoke wafting through the air, and you only knew one person who could be smoking at this hour. Your breath hitched in anticipation.
"You bringing a woman to your bed again, Sanji?" The other person asked playfully, but there was a hint of disbelief in his voice. You carefully took a peek so you won't accidentally reveal yourself and be accused of eavesdropping. Two people came into view with their backs facing you.
"Now, what are you talking about, Patty? I am a gentleman. I only had a nice chat with the lovely lady and escorted her back to her ship." Sanji interjected, a cigarette hanging on his lips.
Patty huffed. "I didn't know that chatting included kiss marks on jawlines."
This caused Sanji to laugh and say, "Not my fault she was charmed by my food."
"The boss man ain't gonna like it when he finds out about this."
"He's not gonna find out." Sanji assured him, wiping off the said kiss mark on his jaw. You stared at him as he did so, and you pitied the woman who planted that kiss, knowing she was just one of the many beautiful ladies Sanji had flirted with before. However, a tinge of pain in your chest said otherwise, taunting you that it was not pity you're feeling, but foul jealousy.
"Why don't you look for more decent women, eh? How about 'little lass' for a change?" Patty suddenly suggested.
It was like someone had hit your stomach with one of the metal pans in the kitchen with the way it lurched in surprise and nervousness. Your heartbeat started to quicken the longer you waited for his response, making your grip on your skirt tighter. In moments like these, you allowed yourself to hope, to wish that he saw something in you and that he finds you beautiful and lovely enough to be the person standing by his side.
But his answer made all that hope crumble down into nothing but dust.
"I don't see her that way." Sanji said after a long stretch of silence, taking a long drag from the cigarette then releasing the smoke in a single breath.
Ah.
You blinked repeatedly, trying to keep the tears from forming. It's always been like this, so why can't you get used to it? Taking a deep breath, you gulped away the knot forming in your throat and decided to leave. You can grab the clothes later.
"You're too kind for him." Someone behind you spoke, making you jump and tense up. Turning around, you saw Zeff looking at you with an unreadable emotion in his eyes and his hands on his hips, almost like he knew your secret. Of course he does. He always sees everything.
You stumbled on your words. "Sir?"
"That boy is always up to something." He began, switching his attention to Sanji. "One minute he's stubbornly immature in the kitchen, and the next he'll be a thirsty man staring at women like they're liquid booze."
Clearing your throat, you forced a smile.
"Well, he can be a lot sometimes." You agreed, remembering the days when the two of you would fight over irrelevant matters. Then you chuckled and continued, "But he's kind. He's gentle, and lovely, like a freshly made poem you keep repeating in your head. But then he's also confusing, hot-headed, and reckless. He's like the sea, isn't he? Calm yet wrapped with mystery, dangerous yet beautiful..."
You trailed off, an unbearable heat rising up your cheeks and neck once you slowly began to realize that you just ranted out your feelings to the head chef. You glanced at him with wide eyes, preparing to see a disgusted look on his face; however, Zeff didn't appear to be repulsed by your little speech. In fact, the corners of his lips were slightly quirked up.
"But I cannot swim. If I were to drown, he wouldn't save me." You quickly added, hoping to shut down the topic.
He sighed. "You will meet someone who deserves you as much as you deserve them, little lass." He simply said. He then laid his hand out, and on his palm was a little box poorly tied with a ribbon. "Here, for you."
Altnough you were a bit confused at the random gift, you accepted it and cradled the box to your chest. "I'll be okay, Zeff." You insisted, grinning cheekily. "When I become famous, I'll sing my songs here in Baratie, and people would flood the restaurant to hear my singing. And to eat your food too, of course."
The head chef nodded, relief flooding his expression. "I look forward to that." He said while awkwardly returning your smile.
That night, when you were sure that everyone in the Baratie was asleep, you opened the loose floorboard on the floors of your bedroom and grabbed the wooden box you kept hidden for a long time now. You opened the lid and began counting the Berry you saved for the past few months.
Tomorrow was the perfect day to leave.
You just can't stay here. Yes, you had a roof over your head, delicious food to eat everyday, and clean clothes to wear but you were so miserable. This wasn't the life you wanted. You wish to go out there, sing your heart out, and fall in love with someone who actually loves you back.
A knock on your door made you freeze. You held your breath as the person on the other side continued to knock a few more times. "You awake?"
Pain surged through your veins, your chest twisting in agony. Sanji.
"You didn't come down for dinner. I guess you're too tired, hmm?" He said, his muffled voice gentle, and the sound almost prompted you to stand up and open the door for him. But you dug your fingernails in your palms and resisted, because you can't just let this opportunity pass by.
You heard a brief clinking sound before Sanji spoke again, "Sweet dreams, ange."
Once his footsteps faded away, you cautiously moved towards your door and opened it as quietly as you can. There, on the floor, was a small plate with a slice of your favorite desert: angel's food cake, topped with fresh cream and strawberries.
You bent down and saw a note beside the plate. And when you got to read the contents of the note, you burst into tears and sobs that wracked down your entire body.
Happy Birthday
— S.
You ate the cake with tears silently falling down your cheeks, and that was the first time you failed to leave Sanji Vinsmoke.
⸻ • ⸻
Today was the day, and you won't allow anyone to ruin it for you.
You had saved enough Berries to travel around the world and sustain yourself for the upcoming months. Your notebook containing the lyrics of the songs you wrote laid open on top of your bed as you spent all night revising them while planning out an itinerary. Then you'll find a place to settle in, a stable job that required doing what you loved the most, and overall just be peaceful and free from pirates and chefs and pirate chefs. It was perfect.
Folded clothes surrounded you everywhere, ready to be packed in your bags. Once you finished stuffing them all in, you grabbed your treasured instrument, the one thing you couldn't live without: your guitar, which has been with you since you were a little child. It was given by your mother and you've been attached to it ever since.
It has scratches all over its wooden surface, and the strings needed some fixing occassionally, but you wouldn't trade it for the greatest treasures in the world. You ran your fingers over it, suddenly feeling like it was lacking something. Seeing the paint chipping off at the corners, you figured that it needed a little color.  You'll need lacquer, and paint if you managed to find some.
You set the guitar aside and left your bedroom to head downstairs to the kitchen. As you were about to push the doors open, a loud, angry shout made you stop in your tracks.
"I won't ever become a pathetic waiter for you!" Sanji's thunderous yells can be heard from outside. Your shoulders tensed up. It was a good thing that brunch was over and all the customers had left.
Zeff's own furious voice followed, "Leave then, for all I care! You can do anything you want, but don't you ever serve one of your shit dishes in my kitchen!"
A frown settled on your face. Their fights were a normal occurrence to you, but this one sounded more grave than usual. Crossing your arms, you stepped in closer to the entrance and hesitated whether you should go in or not. Before you could make a decision, Zeff beat you to it by pushing the doors open, rage emanating from his figure as he ignored and walked past you.
Without hesitation this time, you entered the kitchen, greeted by the sight of Sanji bowing over the counter, breathing heavily, his face covered with his hair. He didn't move an inch even as you approached him, the clacking of the heels in your boots echoing throughout the room.
Both of you were silent as you rummaged through cabinets, trying to find lacquer to cover your guitar with, while he tried his best to calm himself down after his outburst. Many cupboards later, you finally found a small can of used up lacquer, but as you started to reach for it, your hand completely stopped mid-air.
You looked over your shoulder, and found Sanji already recovered from the argument seeing that he was on the move again, preparing a cut of beef tenderloin and other ingredients he needed for tonight's dinner.
Slowly, you closed the cupboard and went closer to him. He still refused to look at you. And so you watched him place a bag of flour on the countertop, slices of cold butter, and a variety of spice bottles to season the meat with.
Sanji began to wrap twine around the beef tenderloin. You sighed, and before you could stop yourself, you grabbed a bowl and decided to help him. Your guitar can wait.
It was rare for you to cook inside the kitchen, having so little knowledge about food and how they were prepared, but you knew this recipe well. You poured two cups of flour through the sifter, followed by placing heaps of the cold butter in the mixture.
The moment you started to mix the dough for the puff pastry, Sanji quickly pointed out in a monotone voice, "You're adding too much butter."
You raised your head and glanced at him, his attention now on the meat he was searing on a skillet. You smiled, glad that he was speaking again.
"You're beginning to sound like the old man himself." You joked lightly.
His jaw clenched. "Don't compare me to that shitty geezer."
In a softer voice, you asked, "What happened?"
"The usual." He replied curtly. "Didn't approve of my dishes."
You perked up upon hearing about a dish he made himself. Sanji was talented when it comes to creating his own recipes, and sometimes, you would be the person he chooses to test them out. Every time he lets you taste them, your chest would feel warm and you wouldn't be able to sleep for days because you'll keep replaying it in your head. "What did you make this time?"
"It doesn't matter. He'll never agree to any of them."
"Maybe I can—"
"Drop it. Don't poke your nose in things you're not involved." Sanji cut you off, his hardened gaze meeting your concerned stare. You only blinked at him, straightening up.
"I see." You muttered, eyes landing on the bag of flour. You looked at him, then at the flour, then back at him. A smile began to form on your lips as a devious plan formulated itself in your brain. Sticking your hand inside the bag of flour, you took a fistful of the pillowy powder and threw it straight into his face.
Sanji jumped back, flinching and closing his eyes when some of the flour's particles managed to enter them. His jaw dropped open in surprise, hands quickly removing themselves from the skillet's handle to dust off the flour that rested on his now white hair. You tried to stifle a laugh as you watched him struggle getting the flour out.
Once he managed to clean himself, he stared straight at you and said in the calmest way possible, even if you knew deep inside that he was fuming, "What was that for?"
A high-pitched snort left your mouth. You covered it to prevent yourself from laughing.
You cleared your throat and smiled at him innocently. "Am I involved now?"
His piercing blue eyes then started to sparkle with mirth, amusement replacing the vexation previously swimming in them. He also looked to be trying to push down a smile, and that made your heart skip a beat. "You're insufferable."
He reached for the bag of flour. You squeaked and took off running, trying to escape from his attack, but he still managed to throw a small amount on you. Giggling, you ran the opposite direction to confuse him, and yet he caught up with you, throwing another round of flour. This time, it hit your cheeks, making you laugh loudly. He laughed along, pointing a finger at you because you probably looked crazy at the moment.
You tried to take the bag of flour away from him, but he just took it an as opportunity to catch your arm and grip it firmly. He pulled you into his chest, caging you completely.
With your cheeks warm and your breaths short, you tilted your head up and looked at him, noticing the way that you were both covered in flour; and not only that, you also noticed the short distance between your bodies and how your noses were almost touching. His pupils were dilated, black dominating the alluring blue shade that kept haunting your dreams. You drank in the attention he was giving you, the breathing coming out from his soft lips, and the comfortable silence that wrapped around the both of you like a safe little bubble.
"Caught you." Sanji muttered, voice deeper and huskier, making you let out a quiet sigh. His arms snaked around your waist as he leaned in closer. A million questions started to run inside your head, begging to know what this situation was and how you got into it. "Nowhere to run now, darling."
A slamming of doors shattered the secret moment you shared, and you immediately pulled away from each other. You pushed down your disappointment and hid it in the secret crevice in your heart as the two of you faced your intruder.
Zeff observed your flour-laden figures, his thick eyebrows scrunched together in irritation. He then demanded, voice seething and dripping with anger, "What in the hell are you two little brats doing?"
Sanji blurted out in defense, "Zeff, we—she was the one who started it!"
"And you went along with it!" You accused incredulously, grinning from ear-to-ear. Sanji grinned back, shaking his head and biting his lower lip.
"Oh, shut up before I stitch your mouths! Just by looking at you two, I already know that you snot-nosed shits are both at fault!" Zeff shouted, clicking his tongue at the sight of the half emptied flour. "Wasted them good flour for your childish fights. You're even worse than fatwits. Get out and clean the toilets!"
"Not the shitty toilets!" Sanji groaned, and you couldn't blame him for it. The bathroom area smelled revolting and the floors were always wet for some reason.
"I don't wanna hear complaints from you when you've dirtied my kitchen! Off you go!" Zeff dismissed, and you can't help but to laugh again when you saw Sanji pout like a little kid.
The head chef watched the two of you leave the kitchen together while giggling and exchanging fond looks. Patty, who also saw the whole situation unfold, suddenly appeared beside him, snickering, "I can already hear the wedding bells ringing."
Zeff took a deep, tired breath.
"Oh, they're ringing alright."
You cleaned and scrubbed the toilets the entire afternoon with the man you're in love with, flushing your plans down the drain and forgetting all about them, and that was the second time you failed to leave Sanji Vinsmoke.
⸻ • ⸻
You didn't know how you ended up in a ship full of pirates.
Well, maybe you knew. A little. But it wasn't supposed to be like this.
Your knuckles were beginning to turn white with how tight you were clenching them. A mix of emotions swirled around in your chest, namely confusion, impatience, and hesitation, pondering about whether you should be irritated at yourself or at Sanji.
The opportunity was there, handed to you like a steak on a golden platter, or a miracle that suddenly fell from the sky. The day you met Luffy and his strange pirate crew was the day you immediately realized that he was the key to your exit from the Baratie. He was friendly; a good pirate, according to his own words, so you figured he would allow you to tag along for a while until you find an island to get off to. You just had to ask for his permission and wait for his reply.
Luffy agreed. And you were ecstatic. You were finally going to leave Sanji Vinsmoke and your pathetic, unrequited feelings behind.
Or so you thought.
You watched in horror as he followed you when you boarded the Going Merry, also carrying a bag of his own. He said something along the lines of Luffy needing a cook for the journey to the Grand Line but you couldn't care less. You got here first. Why was he here?
So here you were, sitting in a corner, lonelier than ever and regretting your life decisions. You watched Luffy and his friends celebrate after defeating the pirate Arlong and saving Coco Village from his inhuman hold over its people, but Sanji and the beautiful orange haired Nami were nowhere in sight.
The thought of them being gone together at the same time left a bitter aftertaste on your tongue.
Nami. The first time you laid eyes on her, ethereal was the word that came up to your mind. With soft deep saffron locks that framed her small face and a wide blue eyed gaze, she would have the cruelest of men begging for mercy and affection at her feet.
Unfortunately, Sanji was one of those men.
Fuck, you cursed mentally, rubbing your face with your hands to try and forget about the times he flirted with her and the moments he wouldn't stop talking about her or kept asking about her favorite food or dessert or if she's into blonds. Your already battered heart doesn't need the usual reminder that he'll never see you that way, that you weren't going to experience his sweet words and his loving gazes.
You took a sharp breath. It's okay, you tell yourself over and over again until they were buried in your heart. They'll make a great pair, Sanji the cook and Nami the thief. A strong man with an equally strong woman. Yes. That makes sense.
You'll leave soon anyway, and you'll no longer have to worry about seeing them or how they were going to end up together.
And yet you can't help but to think about the things that could've been if you were the one he was in love with instead.
You were crossing your arms and hugging yourself as the crisp afternoon air was getting chilly when a hand gripping a shot glass filled with amber liquid appeared in front of you. Looking up, you saw Luffy smiling widely at you, waving the glass encouragingly.
"Come on, just one drink! Usopp poured this for you!" The captain exclaimed heartily, obviously trying to uplift your spirits and to make you feel welcomed in his crew, even though you did nothing but to guard the Going Merry while they were fighting for their lives.
You shook your head and smiled politely. "No, I don't drink. Sorry."
Luffy's smile faltered, but he recovered quickly. He nodded, setting the glass down on top of a barrel. "Well, okay." He said, then turned to Usopp, who was currently downing a whole bottle of whiskey. "Hey, where's Nami?"
"Oh, she's with the cook," Usopp replied cheekily, wiping his mouth after drinking. There was a teasing tone in his voice as he continued, "Someone's getting a boyfriend tonight!"
With that said, you reached for the shot glass that Luffy was offering you earlier, grabbed it swiftly, and poured the whole thing down your throat. The whiskey tasted unfamiliar, and it burned and made you dizzy at first taste, but it doesn't matter; as long as it can make you forget just for a little while, you were willing to drink more of the horrible beverage.
Zoro, the green haired swordsman and the captain's first mate, stared at you as if you had lost your mind, but a tinge of concern was visibly written on his face. "Woah, slow down." He warned sternly.
"I thought you didn't drink." Was all Luffy said, blinking in confusion. You chuckled tiredly.
"Now I do."
Drink after drink, glass after glass. You lost count on how many times Usopp poured whiskey for you, or how many times Zoro shook his head in disbelief. Luffy was the same old happy-go-lucky captain throughout the disaster that was starting to brew inside you, turning your brain into mush. You can barely lift your head or your fingers as you asked for another shot in an incoherent voice. Luckily, Usopp was still able to understand you, tipping the whiskey bottle yet again towards your glass.
You started to raise the glass to your lips, eager to just get severely drunk and be over with it already. However, you suddenly felt strong fingers wrap around your wrist to stop you from drinking; and when you caught sight of a familiar silver ring with Baratie's jolly roger inlaid upon it, you didn't need to look up to know who it was.
Sanji's voice was unnervingly calm as he questioned the crew, but the slight shake in his words lets you know otherwise. "Which one of you allowed her to drink?"
"No one. She took the glass and made the decision herself." Zoro drawled, challenging the chef, "The last time I checked, waiter, you were supposed to be the one responsible for her."
Sanji ignored him and turned his attention to you. He stole the shot glass away from you, then kneeled and held your hands comfortingly, smiling. "Come on, ange. It's time for you to rest now." He said quietly, yet loud enough for only you to hear.
You stubbornly shook your head repeatedly and whined loudly. "No! Don't touch me!" You cried, prying your hands away from his, "I don't like you...!"
Zoro huffed in amusement at your declaration. Sanji glared at him for a short second before looking at you again. This time, he stood and gently placed his arms under your shoulders to raise you up. Once you were standing on your feet, he swept you up and carried you bridal style with ease. Another whine escaped your lips.
"Put me down! I want another drink, please, just one more!" You pleaded while throwing weak punches on his chest. Sanji only smiled and began to lead you towards the sleeping quarters. You continued to thrash in his arms as he walked slowly and in small steps so he wouldn't drop you.
Sanji carefully set you down on your hammock. "No drinks for you until you actually learn how to take them." He told you, tucking a stray piece of your hair behind your ear. His thumb caressed the soft skin of your cheek and rubbed it in circles, noting how fast you were heating up due to the alcohol. You pouted.
"Pretty please, Sanji...please..."
He chuckled, staring at you intensely. "Maybe some other time, ange."
You went quiet, staring back at him with half-lidded eyes. Then, you crossed your arms like a child and asked, "Why do you keep calling me that?"
Sanji raised a brow. "Call you what? Ange?"
You nodded. "I don't like it."
He began to smile, the dimples on his cheeks appearing. You briefly wondered if he'd allow you to poke and feel them. "Why?"
"I don't know what it means. Is it an insult?" You wondered aloud, your eyes widening in curiosity.
A hearty and warm laugh came out from Sanji, his eyes forming half-moons as he cackled at your words like they were the biggest joke he heard in his entire life, "Oh, my dear girl, how could I possibly insult you?" He managed to speak between laughs, "It means angel. You're an angel, to me at least. My angel."
Oh.
Your lips parted in surprise. Blinking, you simply said, "You're not Sanji."
He's not Sanji. He wouldn't call you angel; you're not even sure if he found you beautiful or attractive. You wear the same old tattered dresses that Zeff bought for you a long time ago, and you didn't even bother to style your hair or put on face powder like all the other beautiful ladies do. You look nowhere near to an angel.
But Sanji only grinned. "I assure you, I am very much Sanji. The little brat who pulled your hair when we were barely eleven years old."
Your breath hitched at the thought of him remembering one of your fond memories in your childhood. "You remembered."
"Of course I remembered." He whispered, cupping your cheek one last time before he got ready to leave. He turned on his heel and was about to walk away when you spoke.
"Are you going to see her again?" You asked, and he quickly noticed how broken your voice sounded. Sanji faced you in concern and was taken aback with how deep you were frowning. He figured that you were just drunk and women tend to be different when they were intoxicated. You were no exception to that, it seemed.
"Hm?" He hummed, prompting you to elaborate further.
Tears began to form in the corners of your eyes. You shakily mumbled, "Nami...you're going to Nami, aren't you?"
Sanji froze, an icy cold rush filling up his body. A knot formed in his throat, and it continued to tighten the longer he stared at your face. You looked so hurt—like he just destroyed your beloved guitar into pieces. Your lower lips were trembling, your eyes glistening with unshed tears. For a moment, he couldn't find the courage to answer you, feeling like he could die at any second now if he answers your question.
But the answer was simple.
"Yes." He breathed out, a sharp pain stabbing through his heart.
And it only became worse when a teardrop finally rolled down your cheek. "Why?" You rasped, and Sanji didn't know that a single word can hurt this much.
He tried to give you a reassuring smile but awfully failed to do so. He started to explain, "We were just discussing something—"
"Why not me?"
Those three words coming out of your mouth felt like a final blow to his heart. He can feel himself bleed, drained of life and soul because of you and your words alone, and he let you. He let you kill him, he let you make him swim in his own guilt and he doesn't why, why, why.
More tears fell out of your angelic eyes, staining your cheeks with wet trails, and he tried to hold himself back from wiping them off. You choked out, "Why not me, Sanji? I have been asking myself that question for the past decade, and it eats my brain every night like some kind of plague, but I let it anyway. Because why? Why can't you just recognize me and appreciate me and see me? Why can't you go to me if you want to talk about your dreams, or what dish you're planning to create? Why do you have to seek solace in other women when you have me standing by your side everyday, me who is willing to listen to you and whatever you have to say?"
Angry, red rimmed eyes glared at him. Your hair strands stuck to your skin and framed your face as sweat began to form on your forehead. Teardrops clung to your wet eyelashes and your face was drenched like you just took a swim in the ocean. You were burning with fury and rage and want, struggling to breathe properly after your little rant, and Sanji thought you couldn't be more beautiful. You were so beautiful.
"Oh but I couldn't blame you for that. She's just so beautiful, so perfect, and so strong. She could give you anything you wanted and she could be anything that I never was." You hiccuped, smiling forcibly, "But in the end...I will still love you. I will always love you. I think."
You scooted closer to him, leaning in until your faces only had a few inches apart between them. You didn't notice how his lips were slightly parted in shock, nor his eyes that were starting to glisten with his own tears. "No matter where I flee to, or where I lay my heart on, or which skies I look at—it's always you, Sanji. It's always been you."
"I had been so selfless all these years, Sanji. So please, can you pretend to like me too, just for today, before I leave?" You whispered meekly, cupping his cheeks with both of your hands. Numb and completely speechless, Sanji simply gave you a single nod as a response.
You gingerly pressed your lips against his, and he immediately tasted the saltiness of your tears. But your lips were soft, as he expected from an angel like you. And so he couldn't help himself; he closed his eyes and delicately kissed you back, repeating your name in his mind like a sacred prayer and wishing to the stars above to not let the moment end.
However, you broke the kiss by losing consciousness and falling down on your hammock, knocked out and peacefully snoring.
Sanji spaced out, not moving from his position. No. It's not that he didn't want to move—he couldn't move. He couldn't feel anything except for the drumming of his heart, knocking on his chest desperately. His lips were still tingling and his ears and neck were warming up.
He gulped, loosening the collar of his shirt to cool himself down. He needed a cigarette. And a drink.
Scrambling to get up even with his trembling legs, Sanji managed to stand properly. He avoided your sleeping figure and decided to get out of the room as soon as possible. However, when he took a step forward, his foot touched a notebook lying on the floor.
Sanji bent down and took the notebook. He flipped it open, and after reading only the first page, he finally came into a conclusion.
Heartbroken, drunk, and unaware, you dozed off the rest of the afternoon. When nightfall settled on the azure horizon and dusk fell on the rough surface of the sea, you missed the chance to walk away from the crew yet again; and that was the third time you failed to leave Sanji Vinsmoke.
⸻ • ⸻
The next morning, you woke up feeling much better with only the memory of you drinking and crying yourself to sleep and nothing else. Everything was normal, and the crew began to make plans for their next adventure during breakfast.
Everything was normal, except for Sanji, who was quiet throughout the whole discussion. And of course, just like always, you were the only one who noticed his strange behavior. You tried to catch his eyes, but he looked at everywhere except you.
When he finally met your gaze, you gave him a soft smile, hoping he would smile back and everything was fine and you were just overthinking it.
He doesn't.
⸻ • ⸻
"Are you really going to leave?"
Taking your gaze away from the heart shaped cloud you spotted on the clear blue sky, you faced the person who asked the question you were dreading for some time now. Luffy was staring curiously at you, awaiting your answer. You can't help but to smile softly at the captain, whose kindness you have yet to repay.
"I believe we already talked about this, captain." You said, recalling your short conversation last night. He kept asking you if you were really sure about your decision while his eyes darted to a certain blond haired chef every time he shoots you the question. It was strange, and you felt even more suspicious when Sanji pretended not to hear your answer and even refused to glance your way.
Luffy put his hands on his hips. "You know, you're welcome to stay and be a part of my crew."
You crossed your arms, smile growing wide. "And what, pray tell, is my role? Sing battle songs and chant your names while you swing your gummy arms at pirates?" You joked playfully.
The young captain stroked his chin in deep thought, almost like he was considering your suggestion. "That's not a bad idea."
You bursted out laughing, shaking your head in disbelief, "I'll leave first thing in the morning. I told Nami to dock at a nearby island."
"What about Sanji?" He suddenly questioned, leaving you flabbergasted for a split second. You weren't prepared to hear Sanji's name after days of not talking to him properly.
Him not speaking with you wasn't a strange occurence at all; back when you were still in the Baratie, there would be days when Sanji wouldn't bother to acknowledge your presence and would completely ignore you. This would happen whenever he was extremely busy with his cooking or he had a disagreement with Zeff.
And it seemed like this was one of those days, seeing that he had been ignoring you for about a week now. Yes, you have been keeping count. Although he doesn't appear to be angry with you, the short-lived exchanges and the abrupt cut-offs before you could say anything deeply concerned you more than it should have.
You tried to rack your brains for reasons on why he was acting like this. Maybe Nami had rejected him for the hundredth time, or Zoro kept throwing insults in his direction—or maybe his cigarette packet had ran out. Maybe his kitchen knives weren't sharp anymore and he was struggling in the kitchen.
Should you ask him? Should you go to him and demand him to tell you what's wrong?
You pressed your lips together. It sounded like the worst idea you've thought of so far. You convinced yourself that Sanji was fine and he'd be back to normal in no time; there would no need to talk to him.
"What about him?" You faltered, chuckling to ease the tension in your body.
"You care for each other." Luffy explained bluntly and matter-of-factly, "What does he think about you leaving?"
A shaky sigh made its way out of your lips. How will you tell the captain that his cook has been avoiding you like you were some kind of rotten fish these days?
"I..." You stammered, gathering the courage to lie to Luffy even if you thought it would be the gravest sin you could commit, "He...agrees. Yeah. No need to worry."
Luffy grinned, but it didn't look normal at all. You winced in embarrassment. He knew that you were lying and was totally unconvinced.
Luckily, he didn't voice it out. He only nodded and said, "Great! Oh, I have an idea! Why don't you sing for us before we part ways? Think of it as a farewell party for the crew."
Hearing the pure and genuine excitement dripping from his voice, you couldn't turn him down. It was a good idea too, and now that you thought about it, you haven't performed for them yet. "Sure." You agreed, shrugging.
He raised his fist up in the air and cheered. You smiled, watching as he shouted for his crewmates' names to come down and listen to you sing. You prepared yourself for an impromptu performance, making sure that your guitar was properly tuned and your voice was clear enough to give you the best version of your singing. Sitting on top of a barrel, you faced your audience of four, all their eager eyes watching your every move.
As you struck the first chord to your song, you tried hard not to think that Sanji wasn't there to watch you sing the song you secretly dedicate to him.
In the kitchen, Sanji busied himself by plating the food that he'll serve to his fellow crew mates for dinner. He grabbed a large plate and placed the chicken drumsticks that his captain favored, but Luffy wasn't the one in his mind when he cooked those. Looking at the food, he wondered if you would love them too.
He shook his thoughts off and took the plate with him outside. Approaching the crew, his steps slowed down when he heard a familiar singing voice and a melodic tune of a guitar.
Sanji almost dropped the plate.
It was you. Of course it was you, you were the only one he knew who had a voice like that. It was you, and you were singing with a lovely smile painted on your sweet lips, the very same lips that touched his a few days ago, resulting in him not getting a wink of sleep every night. The beam of the sunset right behind you colored your hair in the different shades of the sky as the dulcet-filled notes you made echoed throughout the vast sea. For a moment, he was worried that you were going to attract ferocious sea beasts with your angelic voice and steal you away from him.
He could hear his blood pound in his ears the longer he observed you from afar. You looked happy. Happier than you were when you stayed with him and Zeff. His chest tightened, knowing that you leaving and go on adventures on your own was probably the best decision you could make, even if that means leaving him too.
You were finishing up your song by the time you saw Sanji standing behind Usopp, silently listening. He met your gaze, and for the first time ever, you couldn't read his mind. His expression was blank as you stared at each other, and as you opened your mouth to say something, he cut you off.
"Dinner's ready." Sanji announced shortly, setting down the plate in front of Luffy and then walked away without saying another word.
That was your final straw. You immediately put down your guitar and followed him into the kitchen. You didn't care about how you felt Nami's watchful eyes on you as you went after him, nor how Luffy was scarfing down the dinner and was definitely going to finish it all before you could take a bite; you just chased the blond with determination oozing out of you.
You roughly pushed the door open and found Sanji washing the pans he used for cooking. He glanced at you briefly then quickly looked away after. This irritated you even more as you demanded, "Is there something bothering you?"
"You should eat before the food gets cold." He said with an empty voice.
"Sanji!"
He stiffened. You rarely raised your voice at anyone. Sighing in defeat, he dried off his hands and fully faced you.
Your eyes were sharper than his knives, cutting straight into his soul. "I've known you for a long time now, do you think I don't notice whenever you have a problem?" You glowered, taking a step closer to him, "You have a problem. What is it?"
It happened fast. His hand landed on the small of your back and pulled you to his chest, and the other was placed on top of your cheek, and in a single motion, Sanji captured your lips with his. You gasped in the kiss, your heart dropping to the soles of your feet when he tilted his face to deepen it. Your fingers tightly grasped the sleeves of his shirt for support as he passionately moved his lips against yours. A pleasant heat ran down your spine, your whole body tingling and warming up. You were simply drowning. There was no other way to describe it, and it was only caused by his fervent kisses.
Sanji pulled away, resting your forehead on top of yours, and you took it as an opportunity to breathe in air that you lost. "You are the problem." He murmured lowly, eyes darting down to your swollen lips. Confused and lightheaded, you didn't get the chance to retort.
"Ever since that night, ange, you occupy my thoughts. You gave me a taste of your lips and you didn't even remember the next day. Do you know how that feels, hm?" He said, pecking your lips once again. You made a noise in the back of your throat, turning your head sideways so he couldn't kiss you anymore, but he took your chin and hungrily connected both of your lips.
He spoke between kisses, "You torture me. Ever since I read those songs you wrote about me in that little notebook of yours, you torture me with your presence."
That was when you snapped out of your daze. With all the force you could muster, you placed your hands on his chest and pushed him away. Sanji stepped back, surprised at your reaction.
Without giving him a chance to ask you anything, you ran off and left the kitchen, slamming the door loudly so you wouldn't hear him calling your name and be tempted to go back in his arms again.
You arrived in the sleeping quarters, locking the door behind you. You were sure that the others would understand you needing your alone time. Once you made sure you were on your own, your body collapsed altogether, your back sliding down against the door as you panted heavily.
He knows, was all you could think about. He knows about the songs. He knows about your feelings.
Well, you finally got your answer to your previous question, but a more complicated one replaced it. With trembling hands, your fingers raised themselves to your lips, touching its surface. You hated the way that you still felt his warmth on top of them.
A lone tear slid down the side of your nose. He was cruel. Sanji was cruel.
You didn't come out of that room for days, refusing to talk to anyone as you gathered your scrambled throughts and pulled yourself back together, and that was the fourth time you failed to leave Sanji Vinsmoke.
⸻ • ⸻
A stack of books, most of them being a collection of maps compiled in one, rested beside you while you flipped through the pages of the one you chose among them.
Nami has been lending you her books ever since you shut yourself out from the crew. You ignored all of them and only let Nami in, hoping that she'll be able to understand you; and she did. She was a good listener. Although you weren't particularly close with each other, you trusted her and told her everything: your dreams, your problems, your feelings, and Sanji. In return, she confided in you too.
"Here. So you can finally decide on where you will go to," You recall her saying while she handed you her collection of world map books, "and to distract yourself, of course."
"You're too kind, Nami." You said in admiration. Maybe this is why Sanji was enamored with her. She was a beauty inside and out.
Nami shrugged, yet she was smiling. "Just helping a fellow woman out."
The books did take your mind off the stubborn blond haired man that was still resting inside your heart, even if it was only for a fleeting moment. You tried to search for islands that will be suitable for you to start your career, narrowing some of them down into choices, but your eyes wil always lead back to where the Baratie was stationed.
You leaned back against your chair, letting your head hit the wall with a soft thud as you released a sigh of frustration. Not only will you need to prepare yourself for a journey all alone, but you also have to talk to Sanji sooner or later, whether you like it or not. The kiss distracted you more than the books Nami gave you. You think of it in the morning and dream of it at night, and it only got worse every time you remembered that he kissed you like he loved you.
Relaxing in your seat, you closed the book and listened to the silence.
The Going Merry docked for a quick trip to a market to gather fresh ingredients for food. Sanji will be gone for the meantime and you were free to roam around the ship without his heated stare boring holes in your skin.
But the peace was ruined by rushed footsteps and Usopp breaking into the room, almost destroying the door with his brute force. You frowned, standing up on alert when you saw how nervous he looked.
"Sanji's injured!" He exclaimed, which got your brow raising, knowing that he had a long history of lying to people. However, he forcibly pulled Sanji inside, and you were greeted by the sight of a bruised man, whose lips were bleeding and cheeks were starting to yellow.
You immediately sprang into action. You took the first aid kit you packed in your bag and grabbed his arm, making him sit down on your chair.
"How did you get into a fight in just a span of ten minutes?" You asked in irritation, wetting a cloth with saltwater to wipe off the blood on his lips.
Sanji grunted, tensing up when you took a hold of his face and dabbed on his lip using the cloth. "Some petty vendor was selling overpriced onions, and they weren't even the best of quality."
You stopped for a minute, glaring at him. "So you decided to punch them instead of talking it over?"
He only huffed in reply. Pursing your lips in annoyance, you continued to treat his wounds in silence, noticing him flinching and wincing in pain whenever you compress the bruised area with ice. "Who's being petty now?" You scolded impatiently, "Stay still."
The only sound that filled the room was you hastily rummaging your kit trying to find an ointment and an awkward silence that made you want to jump into the sea and never swim back to the surface. You unscrewed the lid of the jar of ointment and scooped some with your finger, looking at Sanji as you did so. He looked back at you quietly, and you tried hard not to think about the fact that you have to touch his lips in order for you to apply it.
It seemed like he realized that too, glancing down at the dollop of ointment on top of your finger, then back to you. You just gave him a small, uneasy smile, showing him that you weren't uncomfortable even though you were, and shyly took a step forward.
As gently as you could, you spread the ointment on the wounded area on his lips, reminding yourself to not be distracted on how soft they looked.
"A busted lip because of overpriced ingredients...it almost feels like you're doing this on purpose so I wouldn't get the chance to leave you." You half-heartedly joked to lighten up the atmosphere. However, you were greeted by nothing, not even a smart comeback or a funny joke from the blond. You hesitantly observed his reaction, and saw that he was grim and serious, guilt swimming in his beryl blue eyes.
The realization began to sink in.
Oh.
You should've known from the start. Sanji was a great fighter; he wouldn't be injured in the first place. "Sanji..."
Sanji took your wrist and held on it tightly. Your breath hitched, only then realizing how much you missed his touch, his warm, gentle, and loving touch.
"Let me go." You weakly said, even though deep down, you didn't want him to.
"Tell me you're not in love with me." He said, sounding utterly desperate that it almost made you fall down to your knees, "Tell me, and I'll let you go."
When you didn't answer, he stood up and cupped your cheeks with both of his hands. He pleaded, "Look at me. Look into my eyes and tell me you don't love me."
"Please don't do this." You whispered in pain as you tearfully shook your head.
"Stay. Please, stay." Sanji begged, pressing his forehead against yours, "What can I do to make you stay? Tell me. I'll do anything. Do I need to kneel? To beg for your forgiveness? Tell me what you want. I'll do anything in my power to make you the happiest woman in all of East Blue. Just please, don't leave."
"I can't." You answered, closing your eyes, a few tears streaming down your cheeks. You hate the way he was making this so hard for you.
He only continued, "Hate me, curse me, shout at me, if you must. Anything but you leaving me. Or do you want to make me yours? Then I am letting you. Whatever you want, mon ange—my heart, my soul, my attention, they're all yours. I'm all yours."
"No..."
"The crew will be incomplete without you." Sanji insisted in anguish.
"I have dreams, Sanji. Just like you and the rest of the crew." You explained softly, placing your own hands on top of his in attempt to comfort him and relieve him from his confusion.
However, he was persistent, "You can achieve your dreams without leaving. You can stay, and I will support you in everything you do. You're better off staying with me—with us."
You said firmly, "I will not spend the rest of my life doing what I don't want."
"Even with me by your side?"
A few second pass before you finally reply, "I'd be miserable."
Pain flashed on his face, making you want to take back your own words, yet you remained strong and unyielding. Sanji took a deep breath and stepped away from you, saying, "I'd rather have you miserable here than go out there and encounter ruthless pirates."
The statement quickly irritated you, frowning at him deeply. "You think I'll have problems with pirates when I've been serving them for years?"
"Oh, darling, you wouldn't be able to say that once you've encountered worse ones, with bounties higher than you could ever imagine." He snapped, voice raising with each word.
"I can manage on my own!" You bit back frustratingly, your tears evaporating into anger.
Sanji scowled at you, impatiently running his fingers through his hair. "You can't fight!" He shouted, voice breaking in the process, and with it, your heart too. It shattered like glass and the shards landed and pierced through your lungs, rendering you breathless. Your eyes widened, mouth dropping open in shock.
Seeing your expression, he immediately snapped back to reality, regret writing itself on his face. You shook your head in disbelief and let out a humorless laugh, "Are you telling me that I'm weak?"
"I didn't say that." Sanji quickly said in a hushed manner.
"But you're implying it!" You choked, still can't believe that he doesn't trust you. He doesn't trust you enough to accomplish your dreams on your own, and that he was not confident that you'll succeed without him by your side.
You wanted to ask him about the passionate kiss you two shared, about his loving gestures that confused the hell out of you, about his fresh bruises that he received on purpose so that he can get you to stay, and why he did all of that. You needed confirmation. But the question that left you was, "What am I to you?"
Sanji stayed quiet, and your heart broke again once more. Deciding that this was the last time he breaks it, you walked away and left him alone to tend to his own injuries.
He lit up a cigarette as he listened to your fading footsteps. A single teardrop fell down from his eye the moment he placed the cigarette between his lips, and all he could think about was that you hurt more than the bruises on his cheeks.
You packed your bags and spoke with Nami, telling her that you were ready, and that was the fifth time you tried to leave Sanji Vinsmoke—and tomorrow, you'll finally succeed.
⸻ • ⸻
The sun had just risen, and the early morning breeze smelled of the ocean, the calming sound of waves filling your ears. It was one of those days when the sky was clear and the sunlight wasn't harsh but pleasantly warm on your skin, making it the perfect day to start working on a new song and strum on your guitar for the melody.
But today was different. You were standing on the first step of the ship's staircase that leads to a docking station and a wooden walkway towards an unfamiliar island that was soon to be your new home. Your fingers clenched on the strap of your bag, finding this moment to be surreal. You have tried many times to leave, and here it was, right on the palms of your hands.
"So. This is it, huh?" Your trance broke as Nami commented beside you. She was the only one to bid you farewell and watch you leave, since the others were still asleep. You thought of Sanji and how he looked like when he was sleeping, staring at his handsome features so you can memorize them and implant it in your mind. He was your first love; you didn't want to forget him.
You smiled. "Thank you, Nami." You said earnestly, "I would've liked to spend more time with you. It's tiring to speak to men sometimes, don't you think?"
She laughed. "Yeah." Then, she caged you in her arms and hugged you tightly, surprising you for a second before you laughed too and returned the hug. "Stay safe out there."
"I will."
"So you planned to leave? Without saying goodbye?" A new voice interrupted, breaking the hug you and Nami both shared. You swiveled to look behind you, and there stood Sanji, appearing to have just woken up, with the strands of his blond hair sticking up in different directions. You observed his dejected expression, the downward tilt of the corners of his lips, and the glistening of his tired eyes. You stared at his crumpled suit and his crooked necktie. Despite how messy he looked, he will always be perfect to you.
You walked forward and looked at him fondly, with your eyes full of so much love reserved for him and him only. "Thought it would hurt less." You said, raising your hands to touch his hair and brush it down, "And I was right. How can I leave now when you're standing in front of me?"
He sighed shakily as he felt your soft fingers threading through his hair. "Then don't." He whispered. You only smiled at him. He didn't smile back, but that didn't stop you from taking both of his hands and caressing his knuckles using your thumb.
"Every night, I'll look at the moon and think of you. I'll tell my stories, sing my songs, and whisper my secrets to it. Just like what you and me would do when we were little." You told him softly and endearingly, "Would you be so kind as to look at the moon too and think of me?"
Sanji's eyebrows were scrunched together in agony, muttering, "I can't make you stay, can I?"
When you didn't answer, he just nodded his head, understanding what you wanted to stay. He forced a smile and tightly squeezed your hands. "I'm sorry."
"I'm yours." You answered, placing a soft kiss on the back of his hands. After letting your lips linger on his skin for a while, you slowly let go, and with one last glance at his face, you stepped back and made your way downstairs to the docking area, leaving before you could change your mind.
Sanji watched you go. While you walked away from the Going Merry, from the crew, and from him, not once did you look back. He just watched as you went farther away and became smaller in the distance, until you blended in with the crowd and you were just another person in a sea of people. And then you were gone.
It was the sixth time you tried to leave Sanji Vinsmoke, and this time, you finally did.
⸻ • ⸻
The red velvet curtains began to draw in front of you, gently falling back down on the stage as you said your final good-byes to your audience for tonight, a bouquet of roses cradled in your arms while you blew delicate kisses towards them. You can still hear their loud cheering and clapping even as you retreated to your personal room backstage.
A middle-aged woman greeted you inside when you stepped in the room and closed the door behind you, whistling. "There she is, our talented rising star!"
You only laughed at the silly nickname, setting the bouquet of roses that one of the people gave you in tonight's show on top of your vanity table. "You exaggerate, Madam. I have only performed two shows in your beautiful theater."
The madam, who was the owner of the theater you were currently working in, shook her head in disagreement. "And those two shows are sold out!" She informed you proudly, placing her hands on your shoulders, "Let me know if you want to add more, you are welcome to perform here anytime."
"I'll think about it." You replied, smiling. The madam patted your shoulder twice before she left you alone, humming happily to herself. You huffed in amusement, fully aware that she doesn't appreciate your talents at all, but only cared for the money.
Regardless of that, you were happy. It has been a couple of years since you left the Strawhat Pirates and pursued your dreams all on your own, and you've been traveling to different islands across the seas to perform. You never had a permanent home; being a musician meant going to many places from time to time to share and spread out your music.
Yet you can't help but miss life on the sea.
You missed washing dishes on the Baratie and the late night conversations you had with Zeff. You missed Luffy and his weird antics, Usopp and his jokes, Zoro and his blunt comments, and Nami and her kindness.
You missed Sanji and everything that he was.
You stared at your reflection in the vanity mirror on your desk. Your hair was pinned neatly, you had make-up on and you were dressed fancily for your performance. Years ago, you wouldn't look like this. It was hard to believe how much you've grown and changed, but these days, you felt like you wanted your old self back. Slowly, you took the itchy pins off your hair, and cleaned your face with warm water and a cloth. You replaced your dress in a more comfortable one and went outside.
Looking up at the night sky, you saw a bright full moon with no stars in sight. It was just the moon and its beauty, illuminating the pitch black sky with its glow. You silently watched it, a smile growing on your lips as you felt a tug on your heart.
"I wonder what you're up to, Sanji." You thought aloud, cheeks heating up at the memory of your first love and his golden hair and his contagious smiles. Then, to your surprise, a voice spoke unexpectedly.
"Well, I am fortuitous to have met such a beautiful angel."
You froze. No one referred to you as angel except for one.
Sanji.
As you turned around, he was already walking towards you. And there you both were, bathing under the moonlight, with him grinning at you mischievously and you looking at him lovingly.  You didn't know how he found you, but what mattered was that he searched for you and now he was here, and he was still making your heart beat fast in your chest just like all those years ago.
How the pesky feelings stayed and wrapped themselves around your aching heart, you didn't know. But maybe it was because he was standing in front of you, and the way his next words made you run into his open arms and kiss him until you were both breathless,
"There you are, ange."
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taglist part 1 @angel-luv3r @appalost @chexmixtrys @nimtano @sparklyphantom @natalieisfreeziing @reallysparklychaos @maydaylovex @johnnysactualgf @mochamei @kisumisumi @ttokyocat @mypurplewinee @rosaliinnn @nonniecannie @court-jester-stuff @detectivelucy07 @megumiif @untitledandrandom @erin-the-king @fangeekkk @nikolaevna-art @candesstuff @chaoticevilbakugo
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onmykneesformatt · 4 months ago
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too tired. -m.s.
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⭐️hey sluts!⭐️
warnings: softdom!reader, kind of sub!matt, riding, praising, sleepy sex, cockwarming, unprotected p in v (WRAP YO SHIT UP!!!!), no use of y/n bc i hate it🤞
synopsis: after slightly ignoring matt before bed, you show him that you can be just as much of a tease as him.
a/n: HIIIII!!! sooo this is my first fic so i’m so very sorry if it’s bad!! but i’m so excited for y’all to read this is not even funny. anyways, enjoy!!
it wasn’t out of the ordinary for matt to stay up late. it was actually more than normal. especially if he were playing video games. 
it was 2 am. 2:06 am, to be exact. you were laying in matt’s bed, doom-scrolling tiktok half-asleep as matt was focused on fortnite with nick and chris. they weren’t filming anything, but every few nights, they like to get nostalgic and just play video games all night. 
“chris, you’re too fucking loud.” matt exclaims. 
“no, i’m not!” chris retaliates, which you hear through the floor and matt’s headset. 
matt turns back to you with a “can you believe this kid?” look on his face. 
you giggle when you see matt gesturing to his headset and shaking his head. 
you go look back at your phone as matt yawns while stretching, reaching his arms up. his shirt lifted a little, exposing his boxers under his blue pajama pants. 
he caught you staring, realizing what simple things had an effect on you. the ball was in his court. although you loved the idea of late night sex, you didn’t know how matt would feel. 
so, you just laid there, waiting until you physically couldn’t stay awake. 
matt saw your eyes flutter open and closed, how your hand would slowly droop down the whip back up when your eyes opened. 
he came over, shut off your phone, pulled up your blanket, and kissed you on the forehead. 
just then, you heard matt whisper over his headset. 
“hey, she’s falling asleep, and i’m feeling pretty tired. goodnight.” matt states. 
“aww, goodnight matty.” nick replies. 
chris, being chris, replies with, “yeah, you’re gonna go to ‘sleep’.” 
matt rolls his eyes as nick laughs. he ends the conversation and turns his whole setup off. 
you feel his mattress dip from behind you, right as you feel two warm arms wrap around your waist from behind. 
his touch wasn’t helping the thoughts you were having right now. you wanted him. but didn’t even wanna open your eyes. 
to send a signal, you started to adjust how you were laying, carefully moving your hips to perfectly rub against matt’s hips and thighs. 
your subconscious must’ve known what was gonna happen to you tonight, as you went to bed in matt’s baggy briefs and one of his shirts. 
no underwear, no bra. 
you were more comfortable that way, and so was matt. 
matt groaned quietly as he slowly moved his head into the crook of your neck, leaving soft pecks.
“goodnight, my girl. i love you.” 
you didn’t respond. 
matt was a little offended by the loud silence that followed his sentence. 
“baby? you already asleep?” 
honestly, you were about to be. 
a soft groan left you as you shook your head. 
“what’s wrong?” he asked.
“nothin’. just too tired to even think right now.”
he knew when something was wrong.
the way your voice got low, your head would lightly shake side to side with every “reassuring” sentence, and how you’d lack in responses in total.
“well, somethin’ is wrong. tell me, baby. what’s on your mind?”
you could feel him getting hard as you kept adjusting your hips. 
every. single. inch.
“if you don’t tell me what’s wrong, then i’m just gonna go to bed.”
silence.
“alright. your choice.”
you felt him turn over as his arms left your side.
you just ignored him.
bad idea.
“wait.”
you turned onto your back, leaning on your elbows as you tried to peek at matt’s face. 
he didn’t even move.
“matt. baby.”
no response.
boy, did that pill hurt to swallow.
“baby, i���m ready to talk. amongst.. other.. things.”
you were hoping he was gonna catch your drift.
you assumed he did when he only turned his head to look up at you. the dim light coming from a warm, vanilla candle on his desk made him look more irresistible. 
“what.. other things?”
“baby. you know what i’m talking about.”
“mmm. not too sure i am.”
he put on a smug look, acting stupid. 
that’s how he would punish you.
whenever you would tease him or treat him like he was the needy one in public. 
you sat fully up, now leaning on your left hand, still looking down at him. 
“i wanna.. you know..”
“ohh.”
maybe he would be nice and give in tonight.
“mmh. too tired.”
nevermind.
“matt!”
you whisper-yelled. loud enough to grab his attention, but quiet enough that you couldn’t even hear it in nick or chris’ room.
“look, i’m sorry i ignored you earlier. i really am! but-“
“but what?”
his deep voice made you feel knots in your stomach. 
the way his curls laid perfectly on his head.
the way his tattoos complimented his veins.
everything about him made you snap out of your sleepy haze.
you reached over to his hip, pulling him flat on his back.
you swept your leg over his hips, leaving you perfectly sat onto his lap. 
he acted tough, but you knew you could make him do anything you wanted. 
“the fuck do you think you’re doing?” 
matt’s voice was stern, but you knew he wasn’t actually upset.
how?
by the way the bulge underneath your core was getting harder and harder. 
“i’m sorry for ignoring you.”
you left a kiss on his neck.
“i’m sorry for not switching the laundry earlier.”
then his collarbone.
“i’m sorry for not being a good girlfriend.”
then his chest, with the collar of his shirt lightly pulled down to give you easy access.
you didn’t actually think you were a bad girlfriend, but you weren’t trying to guilt him.
you were teasing him.
his least and most favorite thing in the world.
“no, baby. you’re all i want and more.”
matt’s hands caressed your sides.
once he reached up high enough, he realized you didn’t have a bra on.
you could see his excitement.
and feel it.
“then prove it.”
he immediately sat up and pulled his shirt off.
it was like out of a movie.
sloppy kisses as you both started to get undressed. 
next thing you know, you’re completely naked and all he has on is his boxers. 
“can you take your boxers off for me? i need you as close to me as possible.”
you pushed yourself up slightly on your knees, giving him enough room to slip his boxers off and throw them somewhere on his floor. 
he laid back, giving you the sweetest puppy dog eyes you’d ever seen. 
you grabbed his length, teasing your own entrance, knowing it was just as bad for him. 
you kept eye contact the entire time, making sure to see his eyebrows furrow as soon as he was inside of you. 
once he was, it was like he had melted.
slow, sultry movements of your hips was enough to make him twitch. 
low groans had left his mouth, making you closer and closer the the edge. 
after a few minutes of little praises from both of you, you both felt your highs getting closer and closer.
“just like that.”
“you’re doing great for me, baby.”
“look at my pretty girl.”
matt’s hands gripped his sheets, proving his release was getting closer and closer.
the sight of his veins was enough to make you moan his name.
he looked up at you, praying his brothers didn’t hear. 
not that he would be too upset if they did.
“can i- mmph..”
you were waiting for him to ask, as you needed to release the knot in your stomach. 
“go ahead, baby.”
you felt the warmth of his release inside of you, mixed with your own.
you slumped over, laying on his chest. 
he played with your hair while you both attempted to catch your breath. 
light sweat was making his hair stick to his forehead. 
you lightly kissed his chest, feeling his heartbeat. 
you felt safe with him. 
the way he was never ashamed to open up to you, nor was he judgemental when you opened up to him. 
“can i.. maybe.. keep it in? y’know, while we sleep?”
“let’s clean up, then of course. anything for my pretty boy.”
after you showered together, with light kisses and washing eachothers bodies, you went back to bed. 
you stayed undressed.
as he slipped back into you, eliciting light moans from both of you, he wrapped his arms back around your waist. 
“was that enough proof? or should i give you more?”
you chuckled, knowing how tomorrow morning would start.
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missnxthingg · 7 days ago
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Lando scared to hold his baby…just flufffy stuff between him reads and new baby
pairing: Lando Norris x Wife!Reader {daddy Lando au) summary: Lando Norris has held countless of kids through his life, but it's too scary when it comes to his son words: 1 K - warnings: Just an overdose of cuteness!! author’s notes:  As you can see by my previous series, I'm a sucker for daddy Lando. Him being just an idiot and so cute, it's everything I needed. Thank you for the request, I hope you enjoy it!
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Lando has two beautiful nieces to which he has helped look after and take care through the years, always taking them on adventures and making sure to keep them entertained so his brother and sister-in-law could have a rest. He had never had a single issue on picking them up, ever. And not to talk about the countless kids that come to meet him on track. Last year, on an event for McLaren, he held a tiny pretty baby in his hands, so his father could take a picture by their car.
But it was different when he came to his baby.
He had been waiting for so long to meet his kid. He and Y/N had been waiting for so long to have a baby, deciding the right time to give it a try, going through the process of trying to get pregnant and finally getting the good news, only to have to wait nine months until they finally met. And yet, when the moment came, he panicked.
“I can’t do this, baby”, he mumbled, stepping away from his wife, who had been carrying their son, Liam, between her arms in the safeness of their maternity room. They had been alone for a good half hour now, getting to know their brand new little son. 
Y/N rolled her eyes as she rocked little Liam back and forth, while he was deep into sleep under her hold.
“What are you so afraid of, my love? It’s just a baby! You’ve held countless babies before, like Mila and Athena. They are fine, aren’t they? You haven’t dropped them in their heads, have you?”
“But it’s different this time”, he brushed a finger through his son’s cheek and sighed. “I’m clumsy. You know me. What if I drop him?”
“You won’t drop him, Lando”, she toughened up, but he still swallowed dry. “Baby, I trust you more than anything in the world. I know you won’t ever do anything to harm our son”.
Y/N leaned in and pressed a kiss on top of his cheek. Lando was still nervous and thinking about the idea of holding his son for the first time. It was a big deal; becoming a dad is quite scary. What if he isn’t good enough? What if Liam ends up hating him? What if he harms his precious son?
“That’s a lot o what ifs”, Y/N chuckled, making him realized he had said the last sentences out loud. “Lando, we’re in this together, okay? I know it’s scary, but you can do this. You can do anything. You’re Lando Norris, for God’s sake!”
He took a deep breath and agreed with a nod. Then he found a place to seat, just to be more secure with holding the baby for the first time. Y/N gently place Liam between his arms and stayed close as Lando started to feel more secure about holding their son. She only relaxed when he opened a big smile, bringing their kid closer to his body.
“I’m holding him”, he mumbled, making his wife laugh at the statement. She took a seat next to him and leaned over their son, admiring how pretty he looks. “Oh my God, I’m holding him”.
“You’re doing great, my love”, she pressed a kiss on the crown of his head and cuddled into his arm, making their little family as close together as they possibly could be. “I’m so proud of you, Lan. You’re going to be the best dad in the world”.
“He’s so pretty”, he said, admiring Liam from up close. “Looks a little bit like me already. Mum said I was also born with a lot of hair”.
“We carry them for nine months, only for them to turn out to be exactly like their dad”, Y/N laughed. “But that’s okay, because you’re the dad. I would have ten thousand kids that look exactly like you, if I could”.
Lando laughed at her joke and nudged his nose against hers, just before he pressed a sweet kiss to her lips. “I love you so much, you know that?”
“For a really long time now”, she smiled.
“Thank you so much for giving me a son. I don’t think I will ever be able to thank you enough for this blessing”, he declared. “You’re the love of my life, and I’m so happy about the little family we’re building”.
“I love you so much too. And I can’t wait to grow our little family a little bit more”, she kissed him again. “Everything is worthy and less scary next to you”.
Lando and Y/N turned their attention back to Liam, who sighed into his dad’s arms, making them laugh at his action. She swore she saw her husband shed a few tears as he analysed every inch of their son’s face from up close. Their little miracle was finally between their arms.
“We’re going to be best friends, little one”, he mumbled. “Daddy and mummy love you so much, and we’re going to have so much fun together”.
He spent the entire day holding Liam between his arms, and would refuse to let go off him under any cost. Y/N begged him to put their son down so he could rest and go to sleep, but all Lando wanted to do, now that he had the confidence, was hold their baby close to him.
“Look at this drooling daddy. Liam, you’re so lucky”, she giggled, pressing a kiss on her husband’s forehead, as he got comfortable between the hospital’s couch, ready for a long night as a father. “I love you, have a good night, baby”.
“Good night to you too, baby. I love you”.
And just like that, Lando welcomed the night and some rest right next to his newborn son, who quietly slept through the entire night in the safeness of his father’s hold. And after that first scare, he was never afraid of holding his kid ever again.
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ariestrxsh · 23 days ago
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🖤 content warning: 🖤 smut, sneaking around, getting caught, jealousy, daddy kink, praise/degradation, sensory deprivation (blindfold), threesome, oral(m!receiving), unprotected sex, jealous!matt, jealous!chris, sneaky!reader
🖤 summary: 🖤 while exchanging information about their sex lives, matt and chris find out you've been hooking up with them both behind the other's back.
i got this idea from @sturnobessed who had the idea for this plot, and it was also heavily inspired by these two edits ( 1 & 2) that make me cum everytime. okay, enjoy! (also, chat, i think i might be a chratt girl???)
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soaked
"Who are you textin'?" Chris collapsed down onto the couch, teasingly nudging his brother Matt, who was smirking down at his phone. "Just a girl I've been talking to," Matt vaguely responded, eyes glued to your text. "Is that code for fucking?" Chris chuckled, nudging him again. "It might be," Matt replied, silently reading the dirty message you'd just sent him:
"In desperate need of your cock. Come over. I'll do that party trick with my mouth that you like so much."
"How long have you guys been talking?" Chris asked his brother, eager to hear more about the girl that had him smiling like that. "A few weeks. It's nothing serious. We're just messing around," Matt shrugged, still gazing down at his phone screen. "I've been talking to a girl for about the same amount of time. She's really fucking hot," Chris bragged. "Can't be hotter than my girl," Matt scoffed.
"She does this thing when she's giving me head," Chris started to say, but then he stopped himself. "Go on. Finish your sentence," Matt perked up, curious to hear what he was going to say. "She just does this thing with she teases the tip with her tongue while she's sucking and bobbing up and down on it. And she'll moan while she does it. It's like, multi-dimensional," Chris relayed, his cock twitching at the thought of it.
"Wait, because my girl does the same exact technique," Matt narrowed his eyes at his brother. "I mean, that's probably common. I don't know. I haven't gotten head from that many people, but I didn't know it was possible for someone to do that many things with their mouth at one time. She calls it her party trick," Chris responded, running his fingers through his hair. His body temperature was rising just thinking about it.
Matt stared intently off into the distance, taking in this familiar information. "Chris, I think we may be fucking the same girl," Matt admitted after a few seconds of silence. "No way. What would even be the odds of that ever happening?" Chris gave the boy to his left a skeptical look.
"On the count of three, say her name," Matt replied, setting down his phone and turning towards his brother. They counted to three in unison, and then at the same time, your name passed through both of their lips. The two of them stared at each other with widening eyes and dropped jaws as it dawned on them that you might have been sleeping with both of them behind the other's back.
"There's only one way to know for sure," Matt said, picking up his cellphone and going to his gallery. "I'll pull up a picture of my girl, and you pull up a picture of yours," Chris suggested, flipping through his camera roll. They placed their phones side-by-side, each clicking on your photo and confirming their suspicions.
"Holy shit, it's the same girl," Matt replied. He felt jealousy coursing through his veins. "I mean, I'm not planning on dating her. Is it weird if we both just keep fucking her?" Chris wondered out loud, laughing. "I have a better idea. What if we confront her?" Matt asked with a twinkle in his eye. This idea piqued Chris' interest. "I'm listening."
"She's texting me right now, practically begging me to go over and do her. What if we both show up?" Matt devilishly grinned at his brother. "Why the fuck is she texting you and not me?" Chris asked, checking to see if the service on his phone was working. "Maybe I just give better dick than you," Matt nonchalantly responded, knowing how to push his brother's buttons.
"Or maybe she's just saving the best for last. You know, asking you to come over first as a warm up before she invites me over later to finish her off," Chris shot back. Matt punched Chris in the arm. Hard. "We'll see about that," Matt muttered. "What do you mean? Are you suggesting we..?" Chris raised an eyebrow at Matt.
"I'm suggesting we make her choose. Have her tell us who fucks her better. She put us in an uncomfortable situation, and now we're going to put her in an uncomfortable situation," Matt shrugged. "Get even. I like it," Chris nodded, impressed by his brother's plan.
"I'm on my way over. Leave your door unlocked. Wear that pretty lingerie set I like. I want you blindfolded and waiting for me when I get there," Matt maliciously texted back.
Matt couldn't help that he was always one step ahead of everyone. He wanted to get back at both of you, at you, for lying to him and at Chris, for his smart mouth.
He drove over to your house, going a bit faster than normal. The entire time he was death gripping the steering wheel and clenching his jaw. Chris sat beside him playing a new Lil Skies song as they cruised through the winding roads and mountains to your place.
"So, what's the game plan?" Chris asked Matt as the two of them pulled into your driveway. "She doesn't know we know yet. I told her to wait up there in her room for me. Blindfolded. Just follow my lead. Let me do the talking," Matt relayed to Chris as they got out of the car and let themselves inside.
Matt held his finger up to his lips as they made their way up the stairs, trying to synchronize their steps as much as possible, so you couldn't distinguish between their two sets of footsteps. Matt rested his hand on the doorknob of your room and began to turn the handle.
"I've been waiting for you," you lustfully responded, laying on your bed with your legs spread while you were in your pink lingerie with a matching blindfold covering your eyes. They both took in the sight, burning your image into their memories.
"Hey, baby. Sorry it took so long. My brother, Chris and I had to clear something up before I could come over," Matt smirked at the way you laid there, unsuspecting. "Oh, yeah? Well I hope you guys got it figured out," you nibbled on your lip, nervous to hear Matt say his brother's name. "Oh, we sure did. You look so pretty, baby," Matt said, wandering over towards you and starting to run his fingers under the pretty fabric of your panties. You let out a soft whine.
"What are you doing?" Chris silently mouthed to Matt with a confused expression. Matt held his finger to his lips again while he gazed into Chris' eyes. "Trust me," Matt silently replied. Chris read his brother's lips, but he couldn't help but be skeptical of him.
"I know you don't like to talk about the other guys you see, and don't get me wrong, we're not official or anything, so I respect that. But wouldn't it be hot if I fucked you in front of one of them and made them watch?" Matt asked you, a malicious smile overcoming his face while he pulled his dick out of his sweatpants.
"Oh, my god. That does sound kind of hot," you whimpered back as Matt pulled your panties to the side and started teasing your hole with his tip. Chris' jaw tightened as he realized what Matt was doing. He was totally cucking him.
"I know you must really like those other guys you entertain, but you must like me the most, huh? Is that why you're always begging me to come over and ruin you?" Matt cooed, sinking into your heat. "Ahhh. Yes, daddy. You treat my pussy so good," you murmured back, adjusting to his thick rod as it stretched you out.
"Tell me I do it the best," Matt replied, glancing up at Chris, who was shocked, angry, and admittedly a little turned on. "You do it the best, daddy. No one could ever fuck me as hard as you," you cried out as Matt started thrusting inside of you. Chris' cock twitched as he listened to you moaning his favorite word to hear during sex, daddy.
"You know. We have a little bit of a problem, sweetheart. Daddy knows you've been naughty," Matt cooed, still picking up the speed as he pounded into you. "Yeah? Have I been a naughty girl?" You wondered in a flirtatious tone, assuming it was all part of the role play.
"You know you have. Why did you lie to me and tell me you've never met my brothers, hmm?" Matt asked in a sweet sounding voice, but his intentions were far from it. You gulped. "I haven't. I've never spoken to Chris," you said defensively, hoping Matt wasn't onto you. "Blowing your cover already. I didn't say which brother. You know, you're not a very good liar," he replied to you.
"I-I'm not lying," you said in a quiet voice. Panic flooded your system. You thought you'd done such a good job at sneaking around with both of them, making sure they'd never crossed paths when leaving and coming to your house.
"I'm not enough for you, huh? You need my brother, too?" Matt smirked, still rocking his hips back and forth. "I don't know why he'd say that," you responded in between moans, still playing dumb. "Yeah? You think he's just jealous or something?" Matt asked.
"Yeah, maybe he's just jealou- oh!" You whimpered as Matt grabbed your hips and pulled you closer to him, filling you to the hilt with his length. "If he's never met you, then why does he know about that thing you do with your mouth?" Matt questioned you. "I don't know what you mean," you bluffed.
"Sure, you do. I know how proud you are of that trick. Remember? You used it to make me cum a few days ago? I complimented you on it," Matt grunted. You reached up to peek under your blindfold, but Matt stopped you. "Ah, ah, ah. No peeking," he swatted your hand away. "How does he know about it?" Matt asked again, his voice becoming more stern, envy seeping into his tone.
Your stomach dropped, and you swallowed hard. You decided to double down. "I don't know, daddy. I don't know how he knows," you whined as Matt pumped into you mercilessly. "Well, he seems to know a lot about it, so why don't you ask him?" Matt chuckled.
"Ask him?" You said with a confused inflection. "Yeah. Since you don't know, just ask him yourself," Matt said, removing the blindfold you had wrapped around your head and throwing it back at you. Your gaze immediately met the eyes of the brother you didn't even know was in the room with you yet. "Chris," his name escaped your lips as more of a sultry moan. "Yeah, now you know who he is, don't you? Does he make you cum as hard as I do, baby?" Matt asked, leaning over and grazing your cheek with the back of his hand.
You nervously shifted your glance between both of them. Fuck, you thought to yourself. "I thought I was the only one you called daddy in bed," Chris told you with a twinge of jealousy and hurt in his voice, taking a few steps closer to you.
"So, we don't really appreciate that you've been keeping us both a secret from the other, and we're gonna make you choose. Which one of us do you want more?" Matt wondered, studying your pathetic expression while he hit your sweet spot. "I can't choose," you softly mewled, shaking your head.
"Come on, sweetheart. Just pick one. Who fucks you better, hmm?" Chris asked, coming around to the side of the bed to brush a few stray hairs out of your face. "Yeah. Pick one. Who's it gonna be?" Matt chimed in. "Both of you," you whispered.
"What was that, sweetheart? Speak up," Chris smirked down at your needy expression and started teasing your nipples through your pretty, pink bra. "Both of you," you cried out. "Both of us?" Matt chuckled at how desperate you sounded. "If I can't have you both at the same time, then I don't want either one of you," you said in a bratty tone.
"Yeah, sure. I've had to share my toys with Chris my whole life, and now I have to share my favorite one?" Matt sighed and rolled his eyes. "You really can't pick just one? You know I get jealous easy," Chris peered down at you lustfully, pulling out his throbbing member and sliding it between your lips.
"Yeah. Come on. Don't you know I'm the jealous type, too, baby?" Matt cooed, reaching down and stimulating your clit with his thumb. "Such a greedy little slut. One of us isn't enough to satisfy you, hmm? Open up," Chris demanded, You stuck out your tongue, and Chris began gently tapping the head of his dick against your tastebuds while he reached into your lacy bra and cupped your breast.
"It's okay, baby, you don't have to lie to spare Matt's feelings. I know I make you feel so much better than he ever could," Chris whimpered, running his pink tip along your soft tongue. "I bet Chris has never made you squirt like I did the other night," Matt shot back, digging his fingers into the fleshy insides of your thighs while he rammed into you.
"Who cares if you made her squirt once?" Chris sneered at Matt. "Remember when I made you cum five times in a row last weekend, baby?" Chris turned his attention back to you, sinking more of his length behind your pouty lips. "Five times?! Jesus, Chris. Quality over quantity," Matt ranted.
"Come on, babe. Do that little thing I like," Chris cooed, ignoring his brother and stroking your cheek. You generously bobbed your head while you circled his tip with your tongue, suckling as you did so and moaning against all his sensitive nerve-endings.
You loved the way Chris reacted to your party trick. The way he'd hold eye contact and grip the back of your head while smiling and biting his lip. You relished in the sweet sounds from Chris that filled your ears as a bit of his pre-cum pooled onto your tastebuds.
Matt continued jackhammerimg into you, bringing you to the brink of orgasm. "You don't even have the patience to edge her and make her squirt, do you?" Matt snarked at Chris. "Why the fuck would I wait when I can make her finish over and over?" Chris retorted.
The way they were arguing with one another, fighting over you, and taking verbal jabs at each other made you clench around Matt. Chris grabbed ahold of your hair while you hummed against his cock, and you stared into his beautiful blue eyes.
"Don't fucking look at him. I'm the one making you cum right now," Matt glared at you while you came undone around him. "Maybe I'm just more fun to look at," Chris shot back, giving you a devilish grin. You glanced between them both, unsure of who to give your attention to. You couldn't get enough of either one of them.
Your climax washed over you, trapping you in its riptide and flooding your system with immense waves of pleasure, ebbing and flowing through every inch of you. Soon, you weren't looking at either one of them, your eyes rolling into the back of your head, but both of their mental images played on the insides of your eyelids.
It was happening again. You felt yourself squirt, your fluids spurting all over Matt's rod as the knot in your stomach came unraveled. Your whole body violently shook as you soaked your sheets, and you let out a slew of delighted sounds as you finished.
"See how good I make her feel?" Matt snarked at his brother. "Just wait until it's my turn to make her cream all over my cock," Chris challenged. After your orgasm subsided, you breathlessly shifted your gaze between them again. They each slowed their movements, pulled themselves out of you, and switched places.
"Why don't you clean up the mess you made?" Matt suggested, a double meaning in his words while he shoved his sensitive head between your lips. Chris lined himself up with your entrance and slowly pushed in his tip, letting you get used to him inch by inch. He watched the way he disappeared into your hole, flickering his gaze up at your desperate expression.
He gently rested his hand on your lower stomach and started applying pressure while he was inside of you, deviously smirking up at you while your eyes rolled back once more. Matt sweetly smiled down at you and the way you generously accepted him.
"That's it. Show me that trick again," Matt demanded. You obediently listened, encircling all his favorite nerve endings with your tongue while you sucked on it. You pumped him in and out of your mouth while your lips vibrated against him, and you watched his reaction.
You loved watching him lose his composure, the way his forehead would wrinkle, and the way his jaw would drop. Matt's knees grew weak, and his eyes lost focus as you swirled your tongue around on it. "You're so good at that," he whimpered, savoring the sensation.
"Stop watching him," Chris gently smacked his hand against your face a few times to pull you out of the trance Matt had you in. "Look at me instead," he said with an imperative and dominant tone. Your eyes shot up at Chris, who was burrowed deep inside of you. "Don't listen to him. Look at me," Matt cooed, carressing your face and tilting it further in his direction.
"Matt can fuck off. Listen to me. Look me in the eyes while you cum for me," Chris commanded you, maintaining his stamina and tilting your chin to make you watch him instead. "Shut up, Chris," Matt barked, fucking your face. "You shut up. Let her enjoy how good I make her feel," Chris shot back, his tip getting to all your hard-to-reach places.
An explosive feeling brewed deep within you. You could feel your heat rhythmically clenching around Chris as you reached your climax. Your juices flowed out of you, coating Chris' length in your essence. "One," Chris counted, smirking down at you.
You felt desire burning in your core as he continued pumping in and out of you after he made you finish, coaxing another orgasm out of you. "Two," Chris cooed, mercilessly fucking you harder than before. You lost control of your body, giving into the throes of ecstasy that overtook you. Your legs trembled as you reached your third climax in a row.
"Three," Chris grunted, pumping in and out of your pink hole that was drooling all over his dick. You felt yourself fluttering in and out of consciousness as Chris pulled climax after climax out of you. "Okay, I get the point, Chris," Matt replied. "Get on your fucking knees, you two-timing slut," Chris commanded you.
You obediently fell to your knees in front of them and opened your mouth for them. They both fervently pumped their cocks back and forth while you hungrily waited to swallow their loads.
Simultaneously they each finished onto your tongue, filling your tastebuds with their flavor and moaning in unison as they smirked down at you. You loved the way they looked, towering over you with the pleasure you made them feel engraved into their expressions.
"You really can't choose, huh?" Chris asked, peering down at the mess you were after they were done. You glanced back and forth between them with your big doe eyes as you wiped their cum from the corners of your lips, "I can't. I really mean it."
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mismatched-sockss · 6 months ago
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Follow my lead
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» Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader » Word count: 5,8k (help, i got a little carried away..) » Warnings: 18+ only, MDNI, squint and you'll miss the plot, established relationship, reader hasn't been able to orgasm from masturbation alone, mentions of using sex toys to cum (f), guided masturbation, masturbation (f and m), praising / praise kink, dirty talk, unintentional edging (f), voyerism, multiple orgasms, some begging, a lot of check ins, unprotected p in v, creampie, i think this already counts as (soft)dom!Spencer, pet names (good girl for reader, baby, love) » A/N: and here we have my first entry for the bingo! it's my first time participating in a bigger challenge, i can't tell you all how excited i am about this whole thing. don't ask me what happend here, i was shocked when i checked the word count... also, this is the first time writing smut again after years, so bare with me please. hope you enjoy!
⚶ bingo masterlist | masterlist ⚶
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“Never?”
“Never. I don't know, it just doesn't do it for me.”
“But you are- I mean, when”, Spencer mumbled, waving his hands around and pointing at you then him, back and forth a couple of times. “When we-”, he trailed off, his cheeks blushing as he got shy and a bit insecure.
“Oh? No”, you started but when his eyes slightly widened you realized it came out wrong. You stepped closer to him and took his hands in yours, softly squeezing them as you looked up at him with a reassuring smile. “Yes, it works when we are sleeping with each other. You do make me cum.” He huffed out a small laugh and blushed a bit more, but the insecurity that had bubbled up was leaving him again.
You pulled him in to you and placed his hands on your waist, then leaned against him and rested your chin against his chest, looking up at him. Shrugging, you wrapped your arms around his mid. “I just can't finish from only touching myself. Not without using toys that require batteries at least.”
Spencer softly squeezed your waist and started drawing circles with his thumbs. He slightly squinted his eyes and nodded his head a couple of times in thought; you could practically hear the gears turning as an idea formed in his mind. You raised your chin. “What?”
“Show me.”
“Huh? Show you? You mean, you...”, you trailed off. Now it was your turn to get shy, the heat rising up in your body, creeping higher until your face grew hot. “You want to watch me.. masturbate?”
Spencer nodded, one side of his lips turned up in a teasing half smile. “Yes. You said I make you cum, so there must be something I'm doing right.” Both of you chuckled at that. “You could show me how you touch yourself and I could talk you through it. If you'd like to try, I mean.”
Subconsciously you pressed you thighs together, which Spencer didn't miss. You licked over your bottom lip, then pulled it between your teeth as you thought about what he was saying. Spencer's eyes followed the motion as he was studying your face, studying your reaction to his proposition.
The thought alone made your heart beat faster and it ignited a raging fire in you. The thought of his eyes watching closely as you lie before him, legs spread and with your hands between your thighs. His voice and words guiding and aiding your pleasure, telling you what to do and how to do it...
Your breath hitched and you swallowed hard. He raised one of his hands to cup your cheek, his thumb softly brushed over the corner of your mouth. “Is that a yes?”, he asked, his voice low. Spencer already knew the answer just by watching your reaction, but wanted you to say it out loud. His other hand sneaked under your shirt, his fingertips caressing your skin on their way higher and higher until he stopped at your ribs.
If he would give you a second, just one second without him touching or teasing you in some way, you would be able to form a sentence and answer with more than a nod. As if he had read your mind, Spencer slightly pulled back, giving you space to breathe and without his hands on you.
And even though this was what you had wanted a few seconds ago so you could properly answer him, you immediately missed his touch and a whine escaped you. He just chuckled and raised an eyebrow, encouraging you to speak, still waiting for an answer.
“Okay. Yes”, you breathed out and nodded, “wanna do it.” A desperate plea still on your tongue, he cupped your cheeks and pressed his lips to yours.
You sighed against his mouth, your lips parting. Spencer deepened the kiss and both of you moaned when your tongues met. A shiver ran down your spine when you felt his hands slide down over your neck and collarbones, over your chest where he was careful not to touch your nipples through the fabric and down to your sides, where he pushed them back under the hem of your shirt, slowly making his way up..
The kiss only broke for a moment when he pulled your shirt over your head, his lips instantly reattaching to yours and his hands back on you, now able to roam freely over your skin without any restrictions. You slid your own hands over his chest and started to unbutton his dress shirt. You just undid the last button when you gasped and bunched up the material in your hands; Spencer slowly slid one of his hands under the hem of your panties and groaned against your lips when he felt how wet you were.
His finger slid through your folds, teasing at your entrance before he drew slow and gentle circles on your clit. When your breath hitched and you began to grind your hips against his hand, he stopped and pulled his hand out of your pants
“Nuh-uh, the deal was for you to make yourself cum; with your own hands”, he taunted, as if he hadn't started this himself just now. He lifted your chin and pressed a kiss to your lips. When he leaned back you tried to chase his lips, whining when he left you hanging and took a step back, shrugging the shirt off his shoulders as he did so. Then he took another step. And another. “Take the rest of your clothes off.”
The buckle of his belt rattled as Spencer opened it, your eyes followed his hands. You watched him pull it out of the loops and drop it to the floor next to him before he unbuttoned his pants – but kept them on – and sat down in the armchair. His eyes never left you, following each of your moves. You hooked your thumbs into the hem of your pants and underwear and pulled them down, letting them pool around your ankles.
“Sit down, spread your legs and put your hands on your knees.”
You stepped out of the pile of fabric and kicked them to the side, right onto the rest of your discarded clothes, then you did as he told you and sat down across from him on the sofa, slowly opening your legs.
Being naked in front of Spencer was one thing, but this? It was a totally new feeling for you; a different – a special – kind of vulnerability you had never experienced before, not with him, not with anybody.
You felt like your skin was on fire, inch after inch getting ignited as Spencer's eyes wandered over your naked body, lingering here and there for a moment; on your bottom lip when you licked over it and pulled it between your teeth, the swell of your breasts and your hardening nipples, down over your soft stomach to your glistening pussy, already wet from his teasing, and your hands loosely resting on your knees.
“Like that. Good girl.”
This wasn't the first time he called you a 'good girl', but today... Fuck... A shiver ran down your back and you were barely able to hold back a whimper, the ache in your core getting stronger and you felt yourself clench around nothing. God, you wanted to feel him deep inside you; tongue, fingers, cock. What ever you could get. What ever he would give you. Your hands shook in anticipation and you felt yourself getting wetter and needier.
Spencer's eyes darkened when he saw your intense reaction to the praise and his jaw went slack for a moment before he fixed his gaze back on your face, trying to gain back some composure. His hands held a tight grip on the armrests, his knuckles almost white, as if he had to physically hold himself back from just getting up and ravaging you right then and there.
You loved the effect you had on him, that just seeing you drove him crazy. It made you feel powerful.
He took a deep breath in through his nose and slowly breathed out, calming himself down. His grip on the armrests loosened then and he leaned back. “I want you to start by moving your hands over your thighs”, he instructed, his voice low and raspy. “Slowly.”
Without having to think about it you followed his words and let your hands glide over your soft skin with a gentle pressure; from your knees over the outsides of your thighs until you reached your hips, then you moved them up to slide them back down to your knees again.
“You can touch your inner thighs as well, but don't touch your pussy yet.”
You nodded and took a shaky breath. The insides of your thighs were more sensitive and you shuddered as you got closer and closer to your core and a soft moan escaped your lips. Even though Spencer told you not to, you wanted nothing more than to play with your clit or slide two of your fingers inside, thrusting them in and out.
And when he moved his hand to his bulge, palming himself as he watched you, you thought that maybe, he would let you do it. He didn't give you permission and you didn't ask, but you didn't stop moving your hands further up. But when your fingertips got too close to your folds, he clicked his tongue disapprovingly.
“Sorry”, you mumbled breathless and pulled your hands back. You slid them back down, closer to your knees, and grabbed your thighs.
“'s okay, baby.” Then Spencer chuckled. “And you can sit more comfortably if you want, by the way. You don't have to sit up with a straight back.”
You pouted with a smile on your lips as you looked beside you and grabbed a pillow to put it behind your back. “I knew that.” You leaned back, testing if the pillow was in a good position and when you where satisfied with the placement you scooted back some more and fully rested your body against it.
“Anything you feel like doing right now?”, Spencer asked. You opened your mouth, but before you could say anything he added with a smirk: “Except for touching your pussy.”
You grinned at him. “What about for you to fuck me?” But he just shook his head, chuckling.
“Patience, love.”
Well, it was still worth a try. You held back the disappointed and needy whine that wanted to come out and for a moment you tried to think about it, you really did. But you made the mistake to look down his torso and Spencer's hand was just too damn distracting. He was still palming himself over his pants, softly squeezing from time to time. And while he was waiting for your answer, he lazily stroked his thumb back and forth over his clothed shaft.
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The words came out choked and barely audible when you finally forced yourself to answer, your fingers digging hard in to your flesh. “Don't know...”
“First thing that comes to mind.” His voice was lazed with amusement; Spencer was enjoying this so much and he knew exactly what he was doing to you right now. His tongue darted out to lick over his lip and the softly bit down in the tip.
After a deep breath you made yourself look at his face and softened the grip you had on your thighs. “Maybe... touch my breasts? My nipples?”
He smiled softly. “No wrong answers here.” With a tilt of his head he raised his chin as confirmation. “Go ahead. Keep your hands on your body.”
With a tender touch your moved your hands up your body, softly caressing your skin, up to your tits and cupped them with your hands.
“Gently massage them, play with your nipples.”
You gasped when you followed his instructions and rolled your hard nipples between your fingers, the sensation shooting waves of pleasure down to your core. With every flick and twist you grew needier. Impatient.
"Feels good?", he asked breathy, his voice shaking a bit when he moved his hand faster and with more pressure over his cock.
"Not as good as when you do it”, you whined.
Spencer chuckled again; his tone teasing. "Want me to touch you?"
You nodded your head eagerly, your back slightly arching into your hands. "Mh-hm, please."
"Wanna see you make yourself cum first, okay? You can do it. I'll touch you as much as you want after."
If you wouldn't get some kind of release soon, you would go insane, completely feral. Closing your legs to press your thighs together for some friction wasn't an option and with the way you were sitting you couldn't exactly try and rub yourself against the sofa. And maybe it was written on your face in big, bold letters, because Spencer – finally – gave you the go.
“Slide your hands down your stomach, move your fingertips over your lips and tease yourself for a moment – yes, good, like that. When you are ready, go ahead and touch your clit. Soft circles.”
The first stoke of your fingers over your clit felt like heaven and ecstasy flooded through your whole body. Your head fell back and you moaned loudly; it felt so good to finally be able to feel your fingers where you so desperately had wanted them that your body started to tremble. A string of mashed together words fell from your lips, you didn't even realize you were saying them. ”Thankyouthankyouthankyou-”
You melted back into the pillow, gasping and moaning as the pleasure became more and more; your other hand found its way back to your tits on its own, groping at the soft flesh and teasing your nipple as your fingers between your legs moved in slow, tight circles.
The sound of clothes rustling made you lift your head; Spencer lifted his hips to slip off his pants, letting them pool around his ankles. He adjusted his position and leaned back, his knees slightly falling apart and he wrapped his hand around his hard cock.
The sight made you whimper, the need to taste him and feel him overtaking your whole being. But you knew, even if you would ask – beg – him to fuck you, he wouldn't do it, not now; you hadn't cum yet. So you did the next best thing and pushed two of your fingers into your leaking cunt.
A breathy laugh fell from Spencer's lips as he watched you start to thrust your fingers into yourself as soon as you had seen him. His grip on his cock tightened and he started to pump his fist faster, not holding back his own moans. He so desperately wanted to bury himself in your tight walls and it took everything in him to hold back. “God, you look so perfect right now... So fucking pretty.”
The both of you worked each other up, the pleasure getting more intense with every stroke; hands moving, touching and teasing with more and more want and desperation.
But somehow it still wasn't enough. “Can I go faster?”, you whimpered, your voice wavering.
“Of course, baby. Go as fast or as slow as you want.”
The room filled with both of your moans and panting, and the sounds of skin hitting on skin – Spencer's fist hitting his pelvis and the palm of your hand slapping against your slick cunt – as you gradually picked up the pace until you were franticly fucking yourself with your fingers.
After a while you slowed down your pace again, trying to catch your breath. You felt the familiar knot form in your belly as you pumped your fingers in and out of your heat, your walls fluttering around them.
“Think I'm getting close...”, you breathed out, followed by a high-pitched gasp when your palm rubbed over your clit.
A groan formed in the back of Spencer's throat. “Touch your clit again; you can go slow or fast, in circles or not, however it feels right.”
You pulled your fingers out and swirled them over your clit, your fingertips effortlessly sliding over it. The muscles in your stomach tightened as your orgasm built up. You fought against the urge to thrust your hips up, trying to keep your focus on rubbing your clit. You didn't want to get distracted, this was the closest you had ever gotten yourself and if you had to concentrate on moving your hips as well as your hand and fingers, you wouldn't be able to keep up with both movements.
Your breathing got quicker and heat was rising up in your body. Just when you felt like you would burst – it stopped; instead of falling over the edge your body refused to go further, keeping you right on the ledge. As if it was taunting you, the sensation became weaker, not even leaving you on the edge any more.
It was always like this when you tried to finish without a toy; your managed to make yourself feel good and when you got close – which also felt like it took forever to even get there – your body refused to give you the release you had been chasing.
A whine left your lips, you were borderline sobbing, as you squeezed your eyes shut. The need to cum and the frustration that it wasn't working, together with the unintentionally edging had you close to tears. You slowed your movements, but kept going nonetheless. “I can't. Told you it doesn't work for me.”
“Don't fight it, you almost had it. Let your body take control and let it guide you.”
You nodded eagerly and met his eyes. “Okay, I- I'll try.” You tried to hold his gaze and after a deep breath you slowly pick up the pace again. Spencer matched your pace, the slow lazy strokes getting faster as he pumped his cock with the same speed your fingers were circling your clit. Your eyelids fluttered as your gaze flickered between his face – all flushed, desire burning in his eyes and slack-jawed, with his lips slightly parted – and his hand stroking his erection.
This time when your hips jolted, you let it happen and shifted your focus to what you were feeling instead of what you were doing. It took you a moment or two to fully let go and give into the pleasure, your movements faltering a couple of times until your mind cleared and your hips and fingers synced up to work together in a delicious, steady rhythm.
“That's it, baby. Just like that. You are doing so well.” Spencer's voice was low and his tone had gotten so gravelly, he was almost growling.
You leaned back, your moans getting louder again as heat spread under your skin until your whole body was on fire , the knot in your stomach began to tighten again. It got tighter and tighter until –
“Oh fuck”, you screamed out in between your moans as your legs began to shake, and when the coil in your lower belly snapped your thighs clamped shut. Your hand stilled and your fingers stopped working your clit; instead your hips kept jolting, thrusting up into your fingers and prolonged your orgasm on their own accord. Your back arched off the sofa and you slapped your other hand on the cushion next to you, tightly gripping it in your fist.
When your body finally calmed down you gasped for air and through the foggy haze clouding your mind you vaguely registered moaning and a string of words – probably an array of curses, maybe even some praise about how well you did, how pretty you looked when you came, good girl – but the blood rushing through your ears was too loud, making it hard to make out any words.
As your muscles relaxed more, your body got limb and let yourself slide along the back of the couch until you were lying down; pulling one leg onto the couch, the other still hanging down. The more oxygen you got, the more you came back to. The shaking in your legs had almost stopped, instead your shoulders started to shake as you began to giggle. “Holy shit.”
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A low laugh made you turn your head to the side and open your eyes. Your were met with Spencer's face right next to yours, a proud smile on his lips as he took in your blissed out state. He had just knelt down next to you, his hand found its way to your forehead and brushed away a few sweaty strands. “See? Knew you could do it, 'm so proud of you, baby.” He moved his hand to cup your cheeks, then further down to curl it around the back of your neck.
Your smile grew bigger and you took a shaky breath to say something, but before you could Spencer pulled you closer and kissed you desperately; the need to be near you, touch you, feel you, overpowering him. You kissed him back just as feverishly and buried your hands in his hair. Spencer let his hand wander from your neck down to your breasts, his fingers leaving your skin burning up and begging for more. He cupped one of them, gently massaging it and started playing with your nipple, rolling it between his fingertips and pinching it with just the right amount of pressure that made you tremble and arch your back into him.
You whimpered and softly tugged on the strands at the back of his head. He groaned into your mouth in return and you felt him shift his position as he got up, pulling his knee up to hold him self up so he could lean over you. His touch and his lips, finally feeling his hands on your body, made you feel dizzy and reignited the ache in your core, your clit throbbing, desperately waiting for his attention.
The sudden feeling of his hand between your thighs made you jump a little, you broke the kiss and gasped which quickly turned into a high-pitched moan when he slipped one of his fingers in between your slick folds, only grazing your entrance as he collected some of your arousal. You were still sensitive from your orgasm, but the rush of him finally touching you was stronger and you started to move your hips.
He didn't make you wait long and so after a few tight circles over your clit, he slid his fingers down to your entrance and sank two of them into you, filling you up so much better than your own had done and reaching that spot deep inside you that you couldn't quite reach yourself.
The both of you quickly fell in an easy rhythm with each other and he had you a moaning and blabbering mess in a matter of seconds; it would almost be embarrassing if you would care about it. It blew your mind every time – every god damn day – how much power Spencer held over you, both body and mind. And if he would be anybody else, it might even scare you.
“You looked so beautiful, love, you have no idea”, Spencer breathlessly cooed against your delicate skin, kissing and softly nibbling along your neck and throat. “Could watch you play with yourself all day.”
You wouldn't be able to say anything to him even if you wanted, your mind getting blank and fuzzy; all what left your lips where breathy moans and pleas. A whiny gasp left your throat when he curled his fingers, pressing his fingertips against the very spot that made you see stars.
Spencer kissed his way to the sensitive spot under your ear and when he spoke again, whispering into your ear, his lips grazed it. “Can feel how close you are, it's okay, baby. Come for me.”
He asked and your body complied.
With his name on your lips, repeating it over and over like a prayer, your orgasm washed over you. Your eyes rolled back and when your whole body tensed up, you tried to hold on to something to anchor yourself. You blindly reached for his wrist and held it in a tight grip, your other hand curled around his arm, clawing at his biceps. Spencer kept the pace he was circling your clit with his thumb with and pumping his fingers into you as you clenched around them, trying to suck him in deeper.
Your walls were still fluttering around his fingers when you released his wrist from your grip and moved your hand to the back of his head, pulling him even closer to you. The vibrations of him chuckling against your pulse tickled your skin and you whined quietly when he slowly pulled his fingers out of your cunt, leaving you empty. He slightly leaned back and looked at you, a crooked smirk stretched on his lips. “Still want more, huh?”
“Please, baby, need you, please.” You keened, not at all caring how needy you sounded.
He shook his head at you, not to say no, but in a affectionate you are something else kind of way. “Think you got enough strength left to hold yourself up a little?”
“Yes, think so.” You swallowed and breathed deeply, nodding your head as you held his gaze. ”I will.”
“That's my good girl.” Spencer closed the small space between you and kissed you, swallowing the whiny sound you made, his lips lingering on yours for a moment, then he helped you to sit up. You watched him reach for the other pillows that had scattered around the couch and bunch them up, piling them against the back of the seats, right next to you. “C'mere.”
His hands found your hips and you let him guide you in to the position he had wanted you in, right against the pillows. He guided you to sit – kneel really – in front of the piled up pillows, chest facing them and gently pushed your upper body with a hand between your shoulder blades down. You lay against the pile, letting it support your body and after adjusting it a bit, you crossed your arms on top and placed your head down; you were practically hugging the whole thing.
He nudged your leg with his knee to spread your legs more so he could kneel behind you. With a sigh you relaxed your muscles and enjoyed Spencers hands roaming over your back. He planted a couple of kisses on your neck and shoulder, then placed his hand on the backrest behind you to hold himself up and craned his neck to catch your eyes. You shifted the position of your head slightly so you could look at him better.
“Are you comfortable?”
You smiled at him and hummed, nodding your head. Spencer returned the smile and leaned closer, to capture your lips in a kiss. It was supposed to be a quick one, just a small peck, but his front was now flush against your back and his dick had fit so perfectly between you, with his shaft splitting your folds and pressed against your entrance that he couldn't hold back any more.
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So instead, he moved his hand from the sofa to the back of your head, holding you close as he slid his tongue into your mouth and deepened the kiss. You moaned into each others mouths, desperately rocking your hips against each other. He pressed himself against you as close as possible, leaving no space between your bodies, as if he wanted to make up for the time he hadn't touched you all evening.
All it took was for him to pull back just a bit more and his cock slipped right into you, bottoming out at once. “Shit”, you hissed at the sudden stretch, directly followed by crying out his name in pleasure when he pulled out just an inch or two and slowly thrust back in, even deeper.
His forehead fell to your shoulder and Spencer let out a long, deep moan. He placed his left hand back on the backrest – closer to your front this time so his arm was circling around you, more like he was holding you in a hug – and his other took a tight hold on your hip. For a long moment neither of you moved, just basking in the feeling of each other and trying to catch your breaths.
Every time you exhaled, a soft whimpering sigh left your lips. You pulled your left arm out from under your body and reached for his hand on the backrest, slotting your fingers between his. He moved his fingers slightly so he could gently squeeze yours.
Spencer was the first to move. You felt him lift his head and press his lips to your shoulder, before he repeated the same slow and deep thrust from before, not moving his body away even an inch from yours. He kept rolling his hips into you in a slow pace, pushing in deep and hard rather than fast.
Your whole body was pushed hard against the pillows in front of you every time he rocked into you, every thrust eliciting a low moan from you. You let your head fall back against him, leaning the side of your face against his. “Fuck, feel so good around me”, he groaned right by your ear, his warm breath hitting your skin.
He kept the slow and hard pace for a while, only moving faster when you pushed back against him, needing to feel more of him. You gasped with every quickening breath, the ache in your stomach was growing again. “'m close”, you breathed out, your hand tightening the hold on his.
With his nose he gently nudged your cheek. “You know what to do”, he said breathless.
You shook your head quickly, whining desperately. “No, no, no, nonono, please, need you to touch me. Please.”
“Aw, but you did so well earlier.” He planted a kiss to your jaw, then moved his lips to your ear and pulled your earlobe between his teeth, gently nibbling on it.
“Promised...Ah... Said 'yd touch me.. all I want...” You got quieter with every word, your voice high-pitched and shaky with need.
Spencer chuckled and leaned his forehead against your temple. “Mmh, I did, didn't I?” All you could do was nod, not trusting your voice any more. But there were no more words needed. He sneaked his free hand between you and the pillows to give you what you wanted, needed.
You hadn't expected to be this sensitive, but when his fingertips slid over your clit you jolted forward, crying out his name. “Fuck...” His chest rumbled with a deep laugh against your back and he pushed your body against the pile of pillows with his own to hold you in place. In sync with the quick flicks of his fingers, he picked up the pace he was thrusting into your pussy, his hips snapping against you faster and faster.
You tried to hold yourself up, leaning your forearms against the backrest, but your arms had gotten too weak so all you could do was hold onto it with your hands in a tight grip, taking what Spencer gave you; your head hung low and nothing more then moans left your lips.
When he felt you clench hard around him, Spencer groaned and leaned his temple against yours, his mouth near your ear. “Such a good girl, taking me so well”, he panted and increased the pressure on your clit; the praise did exactly what he had intended and it sent you over the edge, with a choked out cry your back arched against him and you came, your whole body shaking. He had been close before, but it took him by surprise when you pussy clenched so hard around him that you pulled him right with you, his dick twitching and he spilled himself into you.
Both of you collapsed against the back of the sofa, breathing hard, and you let out an uff when Spencer's weight got too much. “Sorry”, he said breathlessly and immediately pulled back; you hissed when he pulled out in the same move. He moved his arm around your torso and helped you holding yourself up. You tiredly grabbed pillow after pillow and just threw it blindly to the side to let them fall to the floor. The last one was a bit difficult to get out from under you, but after you got it out you moved it to the end of the couch.
You let your body fall into the cushions, ringing for air and with your eyes closed. Next to you, Spencer got up. You reached out to him, alarmed when you heard him stumble; he luckily had regained his balance before he fell over his own feet, but his knees were still a bit wobbly. “Are you okay?”, you asked, your lips stretching into a worried smile. He huffed out a laugh and took the hand you had reached out into his, pressing a kiss to your knuckles.
“Yeah, I'm good. Just wanted to get us some water.” He gave your fingers a gentle squeeze before he let go and bend down to get his boxer shorts to put them back on before he slowly walked into the kitchen. Not even a minute later he came back and handed you a glass of cold water, his own already half empty.
When you had finished your water he took your glasses and put them down on the coffee table. You lifted your arms and reached for him, beckoning for him to come back and lay down on the couch with you.
“Five minutes”, you said softly, a wide smile on your lips; you already knew Spencer was about to shoo you up and into the shower.
He huffed, but took your hand and joined you. You made him some space and rested your head on his chest as he wrapped his arms around you. You hummed content, nuzzling your face deeper into the crook of his neck, closing your eyes. After a short moment you mumbled: “Maybe ten minutes...”
Spencer just laughed and pulled you closer.
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angelsforthenight · 1 month ago
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take care of me…
ellie williams x fem! reader
cw: mdni, modern AU, sub! ellie, dom! reader, loser!ellie, established relationship, use of vibrator, cunnilingus, slight degrading, overstimulation, bush! ellie 🤑, begging, crying, cursing, sub-space, aftercare + some fluff at the end :3
WHAT IS SUB-SPACE? sub-space is an altered state of consciousness that can happen during BDSM play. typically it’s when the bottom gets all high and floaty. subs in subspace may have a higher pain tolerance, have difficulty speaking, and lose all sense of time.
“nn—nnhhh… i can’t— i can’t, y/n, please.” ellie gasps out, on the cusp of release. she feels too much, too overwhelmed by the plethora of different sensations. grabbing your hair for some sort of anchor, her jaw falls slack: pathetic whines and pleasured sobs tumbling from her lips as they melt against the loud humming of the vibrator nudged against her clit. and your mouth only keeps moving.
hold on, run that back. wanna know how you got here?
“babe, i’m not even kidding, i think i ripped out a tastebud.” ellie’s been complaining about this for the entire day, but doing nothing about it. to be frank, it’s been pissing you off a little. ellie could just as well get up and take a look in the mirror for herself, but for some reason she insists on you checking it out.
this isn’t the first time you’ve had to play doctor. don’t get it twisted, it’s cute! having to take care of your girlfriend is a gift you want to keep safe in an enclosed haven. but only when something has actually happened.
when false alarms happen one too many times, it’s only natural you get at least a little annoyed, and you’re very positive that this moment is another one of that case, yet you never seem to get enough. you set the book you were reading down, sitting up on your bed.
“let me see.” you sigh, placing your fingers on her chin, tilting her head up. ellie sticks her tongue out and to no surprise at all, there’s nothing.
“you’re kidding me, right?”
“what? no! i just hurt my tongue so bad trying to shred the guitar!” ellie says defensively.
“well then you’re stupid.” you laugh, “who the hell does that?”
“jimi hendrix does…” she mumbles sullenly, hanging her head low and so very clearly trying to make you pity her and give in. and alas, it’s working.
“stop pouting and come here.” you roll your eyes, even if there’s a hint of a smile on your lips. ellie lights up too, shuffling closer and opening her mouth again.
you scrutinise your stare. it’s a little red, yes, but that’s the entire tip of her tongue. if ellie ripped out a tastebud like she claims she did, she would have at least been bleeding a little bit.
meanwhile, ellie keeps her eyes trained on you. it’s so quiet in the room apart from the whirring fan noises and the sounds of cars driving past every now and then. she likes seeing you all focused, with your attention on nothing else but her. secretly, that’s why she’s always pestering you about meaningless injuries.
“you didn’t tell me where…” you murmur, but you leave no space for her to respond when you clamp her tongue down with your thumb and forefinger; pulling her tongue down a little further so you can get a closer look. the pad of your thumb drags across it to feel something, even if you don’t know what it is you’re really looking for. ellie’s caught off guard by this move. in fact, it projects her into this sudden state of being very aware of what you two are doing, the feel of your fingers in her mouth, on her tongue. she can’t help but fidget, getting distracted.
“don’t move.” you mutter, oblivious to the way ellie’s feeling. that firm command stirs her up even more, her breathing uncontrollably growing heavier. she tries to lock in, but with the way she’s suddenly conscious? horny? fuuuck, it’s difficult. you feel her hot breath fan against your knuckles.
“if you ripped out a tastebud then you would’ve been bleed—“ you trail off in the middle of your sentence when you glance up at ellie. her cheeks are a light shade of pink, prominent even under the warm amber glow of your bedroom lamp lights. her eyebrows are arched upwards, staring at you with this helpless look on her face. she looks so, undeniably pathetic. surprised, you let go of her tongue.
ellie looks away, wiping her mouth with her fist. you realise she’s very faintly trembling.
“ellie…” you murmur softly.
“what are we gonna have for dinner, by the way? you cooked yesterday but i’m very shit at cooking so we could order door-dash but at the same time we did door-dash the day before yesterday and the day before-before so..” she begins to ramble, clearly flustered and embarrassed. you smile.
“ellie.” you say again, taking her hands in yours. she pauses, staring at you. her chest heaves, eyes all big and yielding.
“let’s do this again, ‘kay? wanna tell me what you really want?” you say slowly, and the way your tone is soft makes ellie’s head feel foggy. she takes a deep breath, which almost sounds like a whine.
“i… um…” ellie’s always had trouble communicating what she wants. she avoids your gaze, trying to find the right words to say. she feels like a glop of slime, slowly melting. you give her an encouraging smile, brushing your thumb against the back of her palm in repeated back and forth motions.
“i want you… to, um— i need you to take care of me.” her voice crackles with neediness, urgency laced in her tone. her lips are quivering. you can tell how bad she wants this, but you can’t help but prod her some more.
“take care of you how? lots of ways i can do that.” your voice is consistently soft, almost cooing. ellie’s mind keeps on slipping into this hazy state, lips quivering and eyes half-slits.
“y-you know. i don’t have to tell you…”
“damn right you do.” you tut. “you’re gonna use your words and tell me what you want. i’m not inside your brain now, am i?” the slight change in tone makes ellie flinch, as she’d quite frankly die before disappointing you. you can literally see the cogs in her head moving, calculating what to say so that you’re able to give her what she wants and simultaneously not being bad.
her eyebrows arch again, subtly scooting even closer to you so that her knees are pressed directly against yours.
“can we… uh… like, have sex? like you touching me and stuff?” she whispers, as if somebody else could hear. you initially try to stifle in your laughter, but it slips out.
“oh yeah? how do you want it?” you giggle, amused by the way ellie’s fumbling over her words and constructing her sentences in this weird, adorable way. ellie scowls, not finding this the least bit funny.
“stop laughing at me.”
“how do you want it?” you repeat, grinning.
“i don’t know, you can do anything you want… just… please. i need to cum.” ellie groans, but it sounds more like a helpless mewl. you stare at her whilst ellie fidgets in her seat, eyes repeatedly flicking between your eyes, your lips and your lap. you can’t help but ‘awww’ in pity.
“anything, yeah? don’t hold your word against me, okay?” you raise your brows, expecting a response. ellie shudders in excitement.”
“okay.”
so next thing you know, you two are kissing whilst ellie’s propped up on your lap. you’re aware of how she's grinding on you; trying to give herself flickers of stimulation. you let it happen, occasionally teasing her by bucking your own hips up. whenever you do so, ellie has a hard time kissing you back, losing composure and moaning in your mouth. it’s the hottest thing.
you pull away so you can marvel at the look on ellie’s face; quietly panting for breath whilst she stares at you with the most pliant look. so malleable it’s as if you could bend her into anything you wanted with just a command.
you smush your lips against hers again, only you’re more greedy this time: pushing forwards so you both drop onto the bed. you intertwine your fingers with hers, peppering wet kisses on her neck. the way your lips tug on her skin compiles ellie into mush, with no thoughts running through her head. she whimpers, eyes fluttering shut as her back arches, chest against chest. you continue to administer neck-kisses, leaving a few selfish marks whilst your free hand slowly inches it’s way towards ellie’s pants, tugging it down. ellie’s in her own world: wriggling free from the confines of her sweatpants as her head lolls against the pillow. next, your hand quietly reaches for the drawer. ellie’s eyes are closed, so she doesn’t realise when you pull out a vibrator with the head of a cute bear. you bite your lip, stifling in your amused excitement when you press the machine against ellie’s clothed cunt. ellie harshly gasps, eyes flying open before groaning.
“oh, i fucking hate you…” she laughs, head plopping back down, “you just had… to go for the— stupid bear one…” her words keep on getting broken up by moans slipping out.
“do you like this?” you grin. a wet spot slowly fades in the centre of ellie’s underwear. ellie whines when you heighten the setting. “yes or no?”
“yes….” ellie squeaks. “can we… t-take… aaah…” ellie’s having a hard time speaking with the vibrator flush against her. her underwear is growing wetter and wetter, outlining her vulva clearly. her stomach tightens.
“hmmmm?” ellie’s thighs twitch in delight at the sensation, back arching as she seeks out for more.
“my underwear… take it off, please.” she gasps out, her entire body buzzing. you turn the vibrator off so she has time to breathe, deciding to be nice for now: serving as a prior make-up for how much you’re going to ruin the poor girl. that’s why you do what she’s asked of you, slowly pulling off her undies. ellie shivers at the way it rolls down her legs, twitching at the air fanning her now bare cunt. your place your hand at the top of her mound, fingers spreading through her pubes as your thumb grazes against her folds, slightly opening it and watching as the juices eagerly flow out. you unconsciously lick your lips, pupils darkening. ellie watches you and blushes.
“you’re this needy? just ‘cuz of the tongue thing?” you taunt whilst ellie whines in response. you dip your head in between her legs, tongue flicking out to get a taste. “ohhhh my god, yesyesyesyes…” ellie whispers. you’re hungry, munching on her pussy like you’ve been starving for damn near weeks. ellie’s back flies off the bed, her hands desperately gripping the sheets.
“pathetic…” you mumble, and ellie moans at the way the word thrums against her pussy, sending vibrations in her entire body. her moans unabashedly rip out of her lips at the way you kiss and suck her heat. the frenzy consumes her, as her body jerks uncontrollably. to induce the cruelty, you suddenly pause: an idea flicking through your head like a light bulb.
“i’m really gonna mess you up. sorry, baby…” you murmur but ellie couldn’t care any less, so goddamn needy for release she’ll accept anything you give her. you grab the discarded bear-head and press down against her clit, the setting even higher than last time. it elicits loud reactions from ellie, helpless whimpers tumbling from her lips as she receives thrum after thrums of pleasure.
to make matters (better) worse, you resume your pussy-licking, so ellie can feel both the vibrator and your lips on her mound. ellie cries out, thighs instinctively trying to close themselves up. your hand firmly presses down on her thigh, keeping them open.
“nn—nnhhh… i can’t— i can’t, y/n, please.” ellie gasps out, on the cusp of release. she feels too much, too overwhelmed by the plethora of different sensations. grabbing your hair for some sort of anchor, her jaw falls slack: pathetic whines and pleasured sobs tumbling from her lips as they melt against the loud humming of the vibrator nudged against her clit. and your mouth only keeps moving.
you’re putting the work in, going to town on her and really fucking her up. thick tears stream down her face from how insanely good it all feels, her entire body twitching and jolting. your tongue laps strongly, whilst the vibrator is on the highest setting it can be. ellie’s bordering on becoming animalistic, letting out grunts and loud moans.
“g-gonna cum.. —cumming, i’m cumming..” ellie babbles pathetically, seldom coherent. jolting sharply, she grips your hair tightly, in which you groan from the slight pain, as you feel her warm juices flowing in your mouth. ellie pants as you turn the bear-head off, lifting your head up to glance at ellie.
you did succeed in breaking the hell out of her. there’s a heavy, dazed look written across her face; eyes glazed-over and as if she’s not really here. she looks boneless yet plush. you lift yourself up, gazing at her softly. it’s understandable she’s entered into sub-space after what they’ve just done.
“oh, baby…” you whisper, lifting her up so you two are sitting. ellie complies silently, weakly wrapping her arms around your waist and burying her face in the crook of your neck. there is no train of thought running through her head, and it’s almost as if she’s unconscious whilst fully awake. you run your fingers through her hair, kissing her head.
“my sweet girl… you did so good. so proud of you.” you whisper in her ear. ellie hums in response, burying her face even more. she’s all blissed out, liking the way the tip of your nails dance across her scalp. it makes her feel safe, but most of all loved.
hours later, when you two do end up ordering door-dash for the third time this week, ellie ends up flatly denying the state she had been in earlier.
“nope. no idea what you’re talking about.” she says, yet unable to hide her sheepish smile.
a/n: my singular contribution to kinktober 🧎‍♀️also i am a suuuuucker for sub! ellie like i was so giggly writing this!!! lmk if u were too (˶˃ᆺ˂˶)!!
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parfaitblogs · 5 days ago
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making the bed ❀ s. reid x reader
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in which your night crumbles around you, and spencer is happy to pick up the pieces. 
pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader genre: hurt/comfort  tags: established relationship. (prior) alcohol consumption. reader is semi-drunk (but sobers up). post drinking depression. healthy alcohol information/discussion 🫡 word count: 2.1k a/n: do not read too much into this for you will begin to question why i still enjoy going clubbing. (joke...) 😄 plsss tell me if u liked this or even if u didnt thank u i love uuuuuu
Alcohol is a depressant. 
You remembered the God awful lecture your boyfriend had given you when you woke up one Sunday morning with this feeling of existential dread, and nothing to pin it to. A ramble about how alcohol can temporarily increase the body's production of dopamine and serotonin when entering, causing a worse crash of both chemicals when it leaves. Leaving you, evidently, depressed and anxious after a big night. 
You knew that. 
You also knew how quick you were to seclude within your mind when you were with people. Too many drinks and not enough social interaction tended to lead to your own isolation, sitting on the outer edge of the booth, absentmindedly playing with the charm on the end of your phone. 
The room no longer spun the way it had an hour ago. You missed when it spun. When it spun, you weren't thinking about how little you had to contribute to the conversations your friends were having. You weren't tallying up how many drinks you had already drank, then falling flat when you realised you couldn't remember, and that was a thought more horrifying than knowing it was over ten. You were fun, when the room was a carousel. 
Now, it's simply overwhelming. Loud chattering from both your table, and the surrounding ones. Clinking of glasses at the bar. A sports game on the television across the room. Balls on a pool table being dispersed for the first time in a game. Dancing feet. Music. People. So many fucking people.
Your phone buzzes against the table, and you pick it up before any of your friends could turn their heads to see where the vibrations were coming from. You figured they were too drunk to conclude it was you, anyways. Or to care. 
Spencer had texted you fifteen minutes ago to check in on you, and though it wasn't long ago, you not responding immediately in a flurry of half strung together sentences and emojis was worrying for him. That was probably why his name was now lighting up your screen, a funny photo of him mid-bite of an ice cream as his contact photo, enlarged. 
You hadn't responded for no reason other than the fact that you had no will to. Which should've been a big enough red flag to yourself that you should text him, and you should ask if he can pick you up. Thankfully, he loved to prove how well he could read you, and he was calling you anyways. 
"Hi," you mumble into the phone, angling your body away from your friends, hand held up to your other ear to block out some of the noise the best you could. 
"Hi," he parrots back to you. "You okay?"
An automatic yes manifests on your tongue, but you're quick enough to keep it to yourself before you can lie to him. Instead, you let out a quiet, "No."
He seems to have expected that answer, for he leaves no silence in between your admission and his response. "What can I do to help?" He also seems to be expecting your hesitance at asking him for anything that would require him to move, because he adds, "I can pick you up. Do you want me to pick you up?"
"Yes. Please?"
"I'm already leaving," he tells you, and you can hear his shoes against the wooden floor of his apartment to confirm that. "Did something happen? Are you safe?"
"No, nothing happened. I'm safe," you reassure him. "I started feeling sick so I stopped drinking an hour ago. Now I'm just sad."
"You remember what I told you about it being a depressant?"
"Vividly," you mutter, and while it isn't meant to be funny, you hear him huff a short laugh anyways. It makes you feel a little better. 
"It's important to know," he defends. "I'm sorry I shared important information with you."
"Mm."
Your lack of a verbal response was expected, but he still hated the sound of it regardless. You heard him sigh. "I have to hang up now. I'll be there in forty minutes. Will you be okay?"
"Yeah."
"Okay. I love you."
"Love you too."
No matter how much time had passed, your head lifted every time the door — that your group was so conveniently close to — opened, letting in a rush of cool air and sobering you up with every hit of it. 
True to his word, Spencer was entering the bar after forty minutes, face scrunching up at the sudden onslaught of noises and visual stimuli. Same boat as you, only he had not a drop of alcohol in his body. At least you weren't crazy about it being overstimulating. 
"This is why I don't go to bars," he says once he's approached your booth, and you had stood up next to you, his hand finding an automatic place on your waist. 
"It's usually not this bad," you tell him, but he decides not to ask you anything else upon hearing just how exhausted your voice sounds. You're grateful for that.
The goodbye to your friends is quick, Spencer rattling off a lie about him needing you home for he had work early the next morning, and you only had one key to the apartment. Even the friends who knew that wasn't the case didn't comment on it, and you made a pointless mental note to thank them for it later. You knew you wouldn't. 
The drive home was even faster. Silence, aside from the rush of the wind from your slightly cracked window as Spencer drove, that helped the sick feeling in your stomach from the alcohol you had consumed. 
It didn't seem to help the hollowness of your chest, though.
You weren't sure if anything would, really. A chemical imbalance in your brain — even one as temporary as the deflation from being drunk — was hard to fix without medication. It would go away, yes. But then you would make the mistake of drinking once more, and you would find yourself back in this brain peeling predicament. 
You showered alone. Despite Spencer's offer to join you, and your own personal desire for him to be there with you. It didn't help your fogged mind at all, and you were exiting the bathroom feeling like you had retreated further into your bones. Every movement felt clunky, your skin a heavy coat to your skeleton, restricting your movement down to short shuffles and barely lifted arm movements. 
He was reading when you reentered your bedroom, and you've never seen him put a book and his glasses back on his bedside table faster. He looked visibly tired. Keeping himself awake a seemingly difficult struggle, that you could feel your body heading towards to as well. 
"Hey," he says as you climb into the bed, and he's very patient as you figure out what position you want your bodies in. Head on his chest, but next to him, you had decided on, and his fingers entangled into your hair.
"Hi," you mumble, staring up at the ceiling, counting brush strokes of the paint, as if it were possible to.
"Penny for your thoughts?"
You huff at the phrase, tilting your head upwards so your eyes could land on him. "Do you have a penny?"
He pauses, then angles his head closer towards yours. "Okay, kiss for your thoughts?"
"That'll just distract me."
"Is that what you want?"
You should say no. Arguably the last thing you should be doing when you're sad is let intimacy with your boyfriend distract you. But then again, you're not the best advocate for healthy coping mechanisms anyways. 
"Maybe."
"Maybe?" he muses, and his lips brush against yours. Your heart flutters. 
"I don't really know what I want," you settle on telling him, honestly. "I want my brain to shut up."
His body deflates beneath you, and you feel guilt chip away up your spine at the killing of the less depressing atmosphere. 
"Sorry," you mumble.
"No. It's good. Be honest with me," he reassures you, quietly. His fingers tap at your scalp, "What's going on up here?"
"I'll cry if I try to verbalise it."
"Crying's good for you, you know," he hums.
"I'm pretty sure I still have eyeliner in my waterline. I'll just stain your sheets," you retort. 
"Yeah, probably. That's fine."
You're silent for a few moments, gathering your thoughts in your brain the best you could despite yourself, before you sit up, his hand dropping to the bed beside you.
"I just don't like being... here? Out? I don't know. I'm just really sick of being sad every time I drink. Is there something wrong with me? Did you get sad whenever you drank? Everyone else I know loves going out for drinks because they have fun and they're giggly drunks, or they're clingy drunks. And if I drink too much then I'm a fucking sad drunk, and I'm the only person I know that gets that way. I want to be normal."
He's silent your entire rant, and then some, waiting for your heaving chest to slow, having caught the few tears that slipped down your cheeks. You were grateful — you needed that time.
He reaches a hand out, and you let him tug you back down to the bed, slotting your body atop his own, just so he could see you properly. 
"To answer your question, no, I didn't get sad when I drank," he says, brushing your hair out of your face, before his hands rest on either side of your face. "But I wasn't really happy, either. I just talked more."
"You already talk a lot."
His lips twitch. "I do. Double whatever you think my worst is, and that was me drunk. Focus on the part where I said I wasn't a happy drunk, please."
"But you weren't sad. So there is something wrong with me."
"No, there's not. Alcohol is a depressant," he punctuates his words with a kiss to your nose, which you gratefully accept despite your emotions. "Are you willing to give up alcohol as a whole?" 
"My friends will think I'm boring, then."
He hesitates in his response, but ultimately settles on asking, "Do you think I'm boring because I don't drink?"
"No. Obviously not. And you have a real reason for not drinking, so—"
"—and being sad isn't a real reason to not drink?"
Taken aback by his sudden sternness, you go quiet, breath hitching within your throat. He was right, ultimately. No reason is reason enough. You knew that. 
Sensing your discomfort at his tone, he expels a breath of air and lowers his hands down to your hips. His voice drops to something a little less harsh, as he murmurs, "You are allowed to not want to drink alcohol if you don't like the way it makes you feel. If your friends think you're boring for that, then they're not worth it."
You silently nod your head, beginning to curse your emotional regulators. For while you had kept your tears at bay for the vast majority of this conversation, it seemed all it took was the gentle rubbing of circles onto your hip bones, and a fact checked piece of life advice from your boyfriend to make you cry. 
"Sorry," you sniffle, dropping your head to the crook of his neck to hide your newly tear stricken face. 
"Crying's good for you," he repeats his earlier words, and feels you nod your head. "You don't have to decide tonight. I'd encourage you not to, actually. You're technically still intoxicated."
"I'm sober," you protest, weakly. 
"Okay, honey." He's only agreeing with you to wane any further argument. "I don't think your friends will think you're boring, though, if that's any help."
"I don't think they will either."
He nods his head, and you're relaxing against him a little more. 
"Are you just trying to not be the only loser who doesn't drink?" you mumble, voice muffled by his skin.
"You've caught me."
He relishes in the laugh that leaves your lips, and he places the gentlest of kisses on the side of your head, which prompts you to lift it to look at him again. 
"You're not a loser for not drinking," you say, and his lips pull into a smile. 
He leans his head up, brushing his lips against yours, despite the mix of mint toothpaste and alcohol on your tongue. "I know. You wouldn't be either."
"I know."
your reblogs and replies are always appreciated ♡
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vanesycho · 3 months ago
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Summary: You are playing Whisper Game with Nct127, what could be bad? Until you forget Haechan's real name and this is pissed him off. And if he got you alone, he will do something so as not to make you forget his real name.
Warnings:Smut,fingering,getting caught(?)
wc:1,7k
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“Come on Y/n, this is going to be fun.”
You looked at Jungwoo’s pleading gaze, all of you gathered at home sipping your drinks when Jungwoo said he was bored and wanted to play a game. Everyone admitted they were bored and said they wanted to play, except you of course.
“But I’m really bad at this game, I’m not good at lip reading.”
“Don’t spoil it Y/n, no one is good at this game, the point is to have fun.”
Everyone looked at you with curiosity as Doyoung spoke, waiting for your answer. Frankly, you didn’t want to just sit around while everyone else played the game, so…
“Okay then, let’s play.”
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A few minutes had passed, you didn't expect to have this much fun. You held your stomach that ached from laughing as you looked at Mark and Haechan.
"Your favorite member."
You looked at Haechan's lips that were pursed forward as he spelled. He caught your gaze for a brief moment and wet his lips before repeating the sentence.
"Your favorite member!! Oh really Mork you can't be that stupid."
"Did you say Mark stupid?!"
Mark stood up laughing, the other members stopped him laughing as they realized the time was up. Haechan took off his headphone and grumbled as he sat down.
"Oh I can't believe we're going to get the least points."
"Don't worry you won't get it while I'm here."
You sat on one of the chairs and put on your headphones. Jaehyun sat across from you.
“Are you ready?”
You shook your head, he smiled at you briefly and you started the game.
You knew the first few words easily, to your own surprise, even if it was because of Jaehyun’s explanation. When you got to the third word, Jaehyun laughed and you looked at him carefully when he kept his seriousness and moved his lips.
“Haechan’s real name.”
You frowned, were you reading it right or did Haechan say it?
“Haechan what?”
“Haechan’s real name. Name.”
You paused for a moment and looked at Haechan, he laughed at that. He said something but you couldn't hear it because of the music.
"Haechan's name? Haechan...?"
You could see some of the members around you laughing, you tried again trying to make sense of it.
"Aah Haechan's real name? It's-"
You paused and pressed your lips together when you realized you forgot, you didn't usually call him by his real name and you got confused because of the loud music.
"Wait a minute what's Haechan's name!"
Everyone was laughing and looking at Haechan, Haechan was looking at you with a fixed look. No, you didn't forget his real name just now?
You thought for a moment and when it came to you, you hid your face in your hands in embarrassment, then you raised your head and answered.
"Lee Donghyuck. Ah really..."
When the time was up, you took off your headphones and when you turned around, everyone had gotten off the couch and were lying on the floor, exhausted from laughing.
"Forgetting Haechan's real name was my favorite part Y/n."
You closed your eyes with a whimper as Johnny spoke, and when you took your place, your eyes searched for Haechan. You let out a sigh of relief when you saw him laughing and having fun with the members as if nothing had happened. You were grateful that at least he didn't get mad at you.
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"It's too late, stay here tonight. You can leave tomorrow after breakfast."
It was a common occurrence for you to stay in the same house as them, it wasn't strange, you were all close and they always make room for you.
"So...whose room will I steal tonight?"
"Mine."
When Haechan spoke, you turned to him, he was leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed.
"Haechan, are you sure?"
He spoke without taking his eyes off you.
"Sure, I'll prepare the room for you."
There was something strange about him but you couldn't make sense of it, you decided not to think too much about it and walked towards his room.
You opened the door and saw Haechan packing some of his own important things, you sat on the edge of your bed and watched him.
“Hey, we’re not going to get on bad terms because of what happened today, right? It was just that the music was too loud and I felt like I completely stopped thinking.”
You heard a hysterical laugh come out, Haechan came across you and leaned over as he placed his hands on either side of you, you lifted your head and watched him. He looked at your lips for a moment, his eyes going up to yours and he whispered.
“What’s my name?”
“What?”
“My name.Y/n.”
“Haec-”
He pushed you by the shoulders and got on top of you, you looked at him nervously as he placed his knee between your legs. When he leaned down again, he moved towards your neck, you stopped breathing when you felt his hot breath, he whispered into your ear.
“What were you saying?”
You turned your head away as your ear tingled with his breath, Haechan grabbed your chin with one hand and made you look at him.
“It’s way past time to play games, are you trying to test my patience?”
You shook your head in a negative tone, he couldn’t be doing all of this just because you forgot his name. Right? Well, if it was Haechan, it was possible.
“Donghyuck.”
Haechan grinned as his real name came out of his mouth for perhaps the first time, leaning in and pressing a kiss behind your ear.
“See? It wasn’t that hard, was it?”
His fingertips began to caress your body through your clothes. You didn’t even realize you were holding your breath, you let out a deep breath, Haechan continued, enjoying your reaction.
“Dongyuck, please…”
He stopped his movements and looked at you, his gaze not scaring you but stirring something inside you. He couldn’t look this good when he was serious.
“Mark and Johnny’s room is right next to us.”
“So? Should that scare me?”
He started to press small kisses to your neck. He spoke as his warm breath hit your neck again.
“If you’re quiet, we won’t get in trouble, you can do this, right?”
You shook your head when he looked at you questioningly. He grinned and you held your breath so that you wouldn’t make a sound when he pressed his knee to your pussy.
“See? You can do it, baby.”
You watched him take off your shorts, shivering under his touch as his hands brushed your skin lightly. He leaned in closer and moved closer to your lips, surprising you as you were expecting him to kiss you, he pulled your panties aside and began to gently caress you with his fingertips.
“Hyuck-”
He grinned at your reaction and spoke against your lips.
"Ah...I didn't even touch you properly and fuck...you're soaking wet."
When he effortlessly inserted a finger inside you, you buried your head in Haechan's neck to keep from moaning, Haechan took a deep breath as he listened to your moanings. When he started to speed up the movements of his finger, you couldn't help but moan loudly.
"Ah-ah be quiet. We don't want them to know how I made you moan like that with just one finger."
He grabbed your chin with his free hand and made you look at him. He started kissing your lips, adding a second finger as he started to suck on your lower lip. You moaned into his mouth, your voice not coming out as loud because of his kiss.
After a while, you felt your stomach tighten, you spoke with a teary voice as the pleasure inside you increased.
"Hyuck- I..."
He knew that you were getting close before you even had to finish the sentence, and he was going to give you what you wanted. But the sound of knocking on the door made you turn your head in fear.
You looked at Haechan, his fingers still moving inside you.
"Y/n? Do you know where Haechan is?"
Your heart raced in fear when you heard Yuta's voice. Haechan leaned in and whispered in your ear.
"Answer."
You shook your head in negative.
"I can't..P-please stop for now."
When he added his third finger, you screamed with this unexpected movement, quickly covering your mouth with your hand. Haechan ignored this and laughed at your reaction, keep moving his fingers inside you.
"Y/n? Are you okay? Did something happen?"
You buried your head in Haechan's shoulder again, feeling his breath on your ear again.
"Either you answer now or I'll stop and never make you cum."
You lifted your head and tried to catch your breath, doing everything you could to make your voice sound right.
"I'm okay, it's just...Ah..I, I hit my foot on the corner of the table."
He chuckled at the excuse you found. You pressed your lips together as he sped up his fingers.
"Come on, come on my fingers. You can do it baby, right?"
Instead of answering, you continued to moan, the lack of sound from Yuta at the door frightened you, but the pleasure overcame that. You let yourself go under Haechan.And finally came his fingers, you closed your eyes and tried to collect yourself, you felt his lips on yours. When you opened your eyes you saw him licking his fingers that were full of your cum, the sight made you turn your head away in embarrassment.
"We were getting caught."
This time, he kissed your cheek and said with a smile.
"But we weren't caught, were we?"
"You were caught Haechan. I've been waiting for you for minutes, don't come to my room and stay there. After all, you guys can sleep in the same bed now."
When you heard footsteps, you realized Yuta was gone now. You buried your face in the pillow and made a tearful sound. You spoke angrily, but your voice came out muffled.
"I can't believe this, I'll never be able to look Yuta in the face again."
He placed his pillow next to you and leaned back, putting his arms behind his head. You looked at his comfort in surprise. He turned his head to you and looked down at your body, seeing that you still had no shorts on.
"So...Round two?"
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I really messed up on this one👍🏻 this was my first time writing smut (as it's obvious) I hope you guys liked it bcuz idk😭
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wordsarelife · 8 months ago
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—gorgeous
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pairing: mattheo riddle x fem!reader
summary: being in love with your best friend might be a bad idea, but drowning your sorrows in alcohol might be your worst one yet
warnings: underage drinking, partying, no usage of y/n, a few suggestive remarks
notes: this is my official entry for the hogmarch challenge of @thatdammchickennugget using prompt 2: “are you speaking parsletongue or am i really that drunk?”
the night was rushing fast away in front of your eyes, easy chatter, at the start of the party, quickly turning into drunken singing and shouting along to the music that was drowning out everything else.
the dim blue light that was shining through the ravenclaw common room did it‘s best to worsen the drunken state many of your classmates were in.
mattheo was sitting on a couch, wearing his usual cool demeanour and being surrounded by his friends. they were known for getting a bit drunk, but never making an embarrassment out of themselves through loud singing or obnoxious dancing.
and normally you were known for sitting right next to them and doing the same.
even though it was dark, you could see mattheo's head turn and his eyes searching the crowd for you. you had excused yourself to get something to drink. that had been over ten minutes ago and you were really debating to just go to bed.
the night had turned out differently than you had expected and you weren't really in the mood to act like it hadn't.
"someone is looking for you" a voice behind you said and you turned around startled.
"harry" you said relieved when you recognized the boy.
it wasn't like the two of you were friends, after all you were coming from vastly different groups, but since a project in astronomy you had become acquaintances, sometimes sharing a few nice words at parties.
"why are you standing here all alone? why aren't you with your friends?"
"why aren't you?" you shot back, making harry quirk an eyebrow.
"well played" he complimented and smiled "i was trying to get away from dean and ginny making out"
"ouch" it wasn't really a well known fact that harry fancied ginny, but you had noticed it right away a few parties ago and he had been able to read you well enough to know that you had known.
"it's alright" he shrugged "i just don't want to sit next to it"
"who would?" you asked sarcastically as you eyes fell on the couple, hungrily making out on the couch, successfully pushing seamus off.
it seemed that a few people felt way too comfortable in the ravenclaw common room.
"oi, it's no fun with these two" seamus complained, sympathetically hitting harry's shoulder on the way to the table with the drinks.
"back to you" harry grinned, seemingly uncomfortable with talking about his secret crush on ginny weasley more than necessary "why are you avoiding riddle? i thought you two were the best of friends"
"i'm not avoiding him" you said defensively, taking a big gulp from the vodka in your cup to prevent yourself from saying any more.
harry took a moment to study your facial expression, before he sighed in a tone that almost made you tear up "oh"
"no" you shook your head "no 'oh', stop looking at me like that, potter"
harry laughed dryly "too late" he shrugged "so, being the best of friends is your actual problem, huh?"
you didn't answer his question, but took another sip from the cup. immediately regretting it.
harry cringed "if you continue drinking at that rate you won't be able to speak a coherent sentence in a few minutes"
"maybe i don't want to speak coherent sentences anymore"
"so we're already at the point of drowning our sorrows in alcohol?" he raised his cup and took a sip "no, you're right, it doesn't look like you're unluckily in love with riddle at all"
you sighed "okay, fine, you're obviously smarter than you look" you rolled your eyes.
"well, ouch" harry said offended, but you could see a hint of mischief in his eyes. "am i allowed to join your little club of self-pity?"
"sure" you nodded "the more the merrier i guess"
"there's no better way to spend a party than drown yourself in self-pity with the girl you're kind of on good terms with"
"yeah, totally" you grinned "but i think if we continue talking at that rate we will be able to call each other friends in an hour"
"deal" harry laughed, before he grabbed the bottle of vodka on the table behind you, filling both your own and his cup back up. he put the bottle back and held his cup in your direction "to unrequited love" he said dramatically.
you grimaced, but raised your cup to clink against his. "to unrequited love" you toasted "and unexpected friendships" you added.
"yeah that too" he smiled before you both took a big sip from your cups.
"vodka is fucking disgusting" you complained and harry nodded, making a face that would allow the assumption that he had been thinking the same thing.
"at least it does the trick"
you and harry spend the next hour recklessly sipping vodka, while you were telling each other ridiculous stories. the vodka had a quicker effect than either of you had thought, making the both of you dance and refer to each other as friends sooner than you had predicted.
just as 'dancing queen' began to play and you were twirling on the dancefloor, did you notice the empty spot on the couch occupied by your friends. there was only one of them missing. before it could really register in your brain who exactly was missing, a voice rang out next to you.
"make room, potter" you and harry both turned around, looking surprised at the arrival of mattheo riddle.
"matty" you laughed after the few seconds it had taken you to recognize your best friend.
mattheo's arm darted to the side, catching you before you could fall to the ground. you had made the attempt to hug him, missing his body by a few feet. you had been closer to hugging cormac mclaggen who was standing off to the side.
"there you are" mattheo noted, gently taking your cup out of your hand, sniffing the contents and grimacing at the strong sent of vodka, mixed with a bit of orange juice.
"do you want some?" you slurred, grinning up at the boy, who's arm was still holding you steady.
"how many of these has she had?" mattheo asked harry, thinking he would be a little less wasted than you.
"like thirty-four thousand?" harry answered before him and you broke into simultaneous laughter.
"had to have been a lot" mattheo muttered, noticing the way you were laughing with the chosen one, gripping his arm, like you were old friends.
he let go of you, taking harry's cup as well, emptying the both into the bucket under the table with the drinks. he came back right in time to witness you saying goodbye to harry with a dramatic hug, kissing both his cheeks and lastly his forehead.
"yeah, that's enough" mattheo said, dragging your body back against his when he noticed you going in to plant more kisses on harry's face. he looked bad enough, the red lipstick you were wearing leaving marks all over his face.
harry smiled before he waved at you and turned around, stumbling through the crowd of students probably in search of his redheaded best friend.
mattheo rolled his eyes. "you're absolutely wasted, darling"
you turned around to look at him and unconsciously bring a bit of space between the both of you "is it that obvious?" you asked.
mattheo watched with a smirk, how you tried to balance yourself out, to just be able to stand. your arm ended up stabilizing your own hip and you almost fell full on to the side, when you moved your leg.
"not really" mattheo grinned "come on, baby" he softly gripped your waist on either side, guiding you in the direction of your friends. you closed your eyes, leaning your head against his shoulder, letting him walk you through the room willingly.
"have i ever told you how gorgeous you are?"
"i am?" he asked laughing.
"so gorgeous that it hurts"
"you're flattering me" he smiled, nudging your arm. "but maybe you should concentrate more on walking in the right direction"
he was right. it was taking you way too long to cross the room, thanks to your inability to still walk in a straight line, even with his help.
"hey" mattheo greeted, making the eyes of his friends turn on him. "i'm bringing her to bed"
"already?" enzo asked skeptically, checking his watch "it's only two a.m."
"hey guys!" you greeted when your eyes snapped open. you bend forward, plastering a kiss onto enzo’s cheek. "how the party you doing? good? good!" you smiled, nodding as your eyes fell closed, as you leaned back onto mattheo again.
"what?" theo laughed at your slurred words that had not made the slightest bit of sense.
"yeah, i get it now" enzo nodded understandingly, trying to rub your lipstick off his cheek.
"she's only been gone for an hour" blaise said unbelievingly "how did she get that drunk?"
"she's had approximately like more than a thousand vodka-o's according to potter" mattheo chuckled.
"potter?" draco repeated disgustingly "what has she been doing with potter?"
"harry and i are best friends" you gushed, giving draco an angry look. he rolled his eyes in annoyance, but without questioning your answer.
"let's not get ahead of ourselves, love" mattheo argued, a bit of jealousy in his voice.
"you don't have to be jealous" you softly touched his cheek "you know i love you more than anyone, honey"
blaise let out a loud whistling noise "seems likes she's your girl after all, riddle"
"oh shut up" mattheo said at the same time as you said "of course"
"better bring her to bed now" theo advised and you could feel mattheo nod next to you.
"i'll be back in a few minutes" mattheo promised, as he softly turned you around to be able to walk you in the direction of the door.
"no he won't" you slurred, turning your head in the direction your friends, gripping mattheo's neck and winking at them.
enzo hollored and theo laughed, while blaise repeated the whisteling.
"cheers to that" even draco was amused about you, as he raised his cup in your direction.
"i'll be back" mattheo assured again, pushing you forward.
"no you won't" theo shook his head, smirking as he watched his friend roll his eyes and gently guide you through the crowd.
"how about a shot of tequila?" you suggested to mattheo, perfectly awake again. there was no hint of the tiredness that had consumed your body only a few minutes ago.
maybe it was the alcohol or maybe it was the sound of a familiar voice indicating the beginning of the song 'whatta man' by salt-n-pepa, which was now booming through the boxes.
"no, no more alcohol" mattheo shook his head, suddenly being the kind of responsible he had never seen himself to become.
"oh my god!" you gushed when you finally reconized the song "that's my favorite song! let us dance, matty!"
he was distracted by two hufflepuff boys almost running into him, when you saw the perfect opportunity to escape his hold. stupidly enough, that was the only thing you could see, as you had promptly gotten lost in the crowd of people.
mattheo was at your side only a second after, making you realize that you had in fact just turned around, without moving more than a feet away from him.
"if you don't come with me on your own accord, i'll have to carry you" mattheo warned.
you giggled, clasping your hands around his biceps "let us dance" you pleaded, completely ignoring what he had said.
mattheo furrowed his eyebrows, still waiting for you to reply to what he had said, but you were busy watching a few ravenclaws and hufflepuffs downing shots. "or we could down some shots" you mumbled.
mattheo took that as answer enough, clasping one of his hands around your forearm and the other around your leg, as he bend down to throw you over his shoulder.
"matty" you protested, as he began to walk you out of the common room. you gave up arguing and continued to sing along to the chorus of 'whatta man' as mattheo walked you both through the crowd of people.
as soon as the door to the ravenclaw common room fell close behind the two of you, you slumped down on mattheo's shoulder, the tiredness hitting you immediately.
"do you want to walk on your own now, baby?" mattheo asked, but he could feel you shake your head. "can you use you words?" he was growing a bit concerned at your sudden mood shift, trying to make sure that you were still somewhat alright.
"no" you pouted "i don't want to use my words"
"you just did"
"i never let a man tell me what to do" you slurred and mattheo had to chuckle.
"clearly" he muttered under his breath.
he walked through the halls of the castle quickly, making sure that you wouldn't be discovered by one of the teachers. you would probably kill him if one of them saw you like this. you never really got that drunk often, so it was on mattheo to make sure that no one found out about it now.
he should've searched for you immediately after you hadn't come back. he shouldn't have waited an hour. but he was scared of annoying you. you were always together and he had taken your absence as a sign for you needing some space.
if he could, he would follow you around all the time, preferably holding your hand while doing so. maybe in another universe you would want him to do that.
"when are we there?" you asked, your hand wandering across his shoulder, before it finally found it's place in his hair, gripping it tightly.
"any second now" mattheo was trying to make sure not to shake your body too much, as he quickly walked down the steps to the dungeon. he wouldn't want you to throw up. "do you feel sick, sweetheart?"
"no" you muttered "i just want to sleep"
"i know, i know" mattheo patted the back of your leg "we're almost at the door"
he hadn't lied. it only took a few more seconds, before he whispered the password and the door to the slytherin common room opened, revealing the familiar green lighting as he walked you both inside. he crossed the room, climbing the stairs to your dorm.
he took his time to set you down on your bed, making sure that no quick movement could make you feel uncomfortable. he unfolded your blanket, spreading it across your body.
he was ready to leave the room, before you called him back.
"matty" you cried and he perked up, walking back to the bed. you threw the blanket to the side dramatically, revealing your trousers and shirt. "i can't sleep like this"
"oh" mattheo said dumbfounded "do you want me to take them off?" he asked slowly, gripping the waistband of your trousers.
"are you speaking parsletongue or am i really that drunk?" you giggled at the joke with your eyes still closed.
"you're really that drunk" mattheo answered, rolling his eyes at your unseriousness "and it's not funny"
"it's a bit funny" you opened your eyes and giggled at his facial expression "why are you so serious, matty?"
"i should've kept an eye on you" he answered "you don't like to be drunk"
"i can make my own decisions" you argued, crossing your arms.
"obviously" mattheo nodded "should i take them off?" he repeated his question from earlier, but the tone of his voice made you sober up immediately, well at least a bit.
"are you really angry at me right now?" you asked surprised.
"i had to leave the party to bring you to bed"
"that's not the reason you're angry" you said, knowing him well enough to see through his lie.
"okay, fine" he sat down on the bed and you sat up, drawing your knees to your chest and hugging them with your arms. "maybe i'm a bit angry that you would rather spend your evening getting drunk with potter than speaking to me"
"matty"
"no, it's fine" he shook his head "i shouldn't be angry about how you choose to spend your time. goodnight" he stood up from the bed, walking to the door quickly, so voice rang out before he was able to twist the doorknob.
"can you please just stay?" you asked and he turned around in surprise.
"what?"
"maybe i chose to spend time with harry, but i'm choosing to spend the night with you. isn't that more important?"
"that's not how it works"
"okay, fine" you said, tired of arguing "do you want to know the truth? spending time with you is super hard while i'm madly in love with you" even though you were a bit more sober than before, he could still recognize the drunkness in your voice, especially because you were never that bold.
"madly in love with me, huh?" mattheo repeated surprised, his signature smirk immediately replacing the frown on his face.
“it’s embarrassing, i know” you buried your face in your hands, hiding your rosy cheeks from his eyes. he softly took your hands in his, freeing your face of them.
"don't hide from me" he smiled "and it’s not embarrassing, because the truth is, that i'm madly in love with you too"
you smiled up at him. “can you kiss me then?” he smiled at your question, but shook his head.
“no more kisses tonight” he muttered, softly stroking your hair “we can do that tomorrow, as often as you want to, when you’re sober again”
“okay” you nodded.
he gently helped you to exchange your trousers for pyjama bottoms, before he took of his shirt and climbed into bed next to you. you cuddled close to his chest, your hair tickling him whenever you moved.
"blaise was right" you said finally "i'm your girl after all"
"you always were" mattheo whispered back, softly kissing your forehead, before the both of you fell asleep, holding onto each other.
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