#i know you guys are SICK of hearing it but i feel like such a cheater for using the liquify tool to just move everything into place

[liminalweirdo]

There is something very surreal and very ironic about this, because while the lockdowns were different, and while most countries' political parties handled (and are handling) lockdowns and covid in an absolutely atrocious manner, and British health practitioners in particular were following some pretty abhorrent rules about who to resuscitate and who not to (it was intellectually disabled people), there are still people out there — like me, like many other disabled and immunocompromised people — who are watching you guys party and see your friends and go dancing all without masks, when we have been pleading with you to at least wear masks in public spaces so that disabled people can have equitable and safe access to those same spaces since 2020.

And most of the time no one hears us.

Just because people aren't dying alone in hospital rooms anymore, doesn't mean people are not still dying or become even more severely disabled. We're all trying to live too, and we watch you live like covid is over, and like your decisions to go into public unmasked don't affect us and force us into further isolation.

"Around a half million people died of covid-19 in the United States alone over the first year of this pandemic, ten times the number who ever died of AIDS in a single year." x

In 2024 there are over 7 million people dead

More than 400 million people disabled by covid and counting

The "S" in SARS-CoV-2 stands for severe. You can pass covid onto other before you feel sick and 60% of cases are asymptomatic. You cannot just wear a mask "When you feel sick."

So I don't know. It's 2024, maybe we can do better next year. Please wear a mask in public spaces.

She died on Christmas Day. On Christmas Day! I said goodbye on an iPad! Because of the rules! She died alone! And those awful people and their wine fridges, and their dancing, and their parties, and I listened to them, and I let my mother die alone!

i dunno about the rest of the world but this is such bitter, satisfying british political commentary that i've needed to hear for over two years now. thank you steven moffat this genuinely healed something within me

[mylovesstuffs]

Seungcheol is THAT type of boyfriend

This is my personal opinion and perspective. It may not accurately reflect their real-life personalities or behaviors.

The Protective Boyfriend™: Seungcheol is the guy who will hold your hand while crossing the street like you might just wander into traffic without him. It’s sweet until you realize he’s also glaring at everyone within a 10-foot radius for daring to breathe near you.

Seungcheol’s idea of helping you pick an outfit for date night is standing behind you, his hands on your waist, whispering in your ear, “This one’s nice… but it’d be nicer on the floor later.” Then he smirks like he didn’t just turn your brain into static.

Calls you "jagiya" so often it feels like a title you should put on your LinkedIn. But don’t let that fool you, he’ll pout harder than you if you don’t jagiya him back.

You’re trying to get up after a movie, but he pulls you back down, trapping you in his lap with one arm around your waist. “Where do you think you’re going?” he teases, his lips brushing your ear. “The credits haven’t even finished yet.” (the credits have been done for 10 minutes.)

He’ll put on his leader voice to scold you for skipping lunch, only to order your favorite food five minutes later and feed you the first bite because you’re too busy to take care of yourself.

This man right here is your personal radiator. Winter nights? Perfect. Summer? Good luck prying his arm off you because "you’re my pillow." (And he snores when he’s comfy, but you’d never admit you secretly love it.)

When you ask him if you’re bothering him by calling for the fifth time in an hour, he deadpans, “No, jagiya, I love being your 24/7 helpline. Shall I install a red phone like Batman?” But then he’s at your door in 15 minutes because he misses your face.

He loooooovessssss when you’re flustered, so he’ll accidentally brush his fingers along your collarbone while adjusting your necklace, all while holding eye contact. And when you stutter something about being ticklish, he just chuckles, “Oh? That’s good to know for later.”

If someone flirts with you, his smile gets tighter than his favorite jeans. He won’t say a word, but he’ll make sure to wrap an arm around you and loudly mention that his girlfriend loves this place.

He’ll kiss your forehead in public just to see you blush, then smirk like he just won a prize. “You’re cute when you’re flustered,” he’ll whisper, as if your face isn’t already bright red.

He’s not big on flashy displays, but when he kisses you, it’s deliberate, slow, and leaves you wondering how the world managed to keep spinning after that.

Seungcheol knows exactly what he’s doing when he leans in close, his voice dropping an octave to say something mundane like, “Pass the soy sauce, baby.” But the way his lips almost graze your neck? I'm sure that’s not about soy sauce, bro??? (did I just attempt to call him bro?)

He's the type of boyfriend who would die for you but pretends he’s chill. “Of course, I’ll help you move apartments,” he says, lifting all your furniture with a single grunt while you’re holding a throw pillow. “I’m totally fine. This is lightwork.” (I'm telling you, he’s not fine.)

SEVENTEEN is sick of hearing about how amazing, talented, and gorgeous you are but the sparkle in his eyes says he’s never shutting up about you.

Out of nowhere, he’ll text you, “You’re my favorite person.” No context. Just vibes. And when you ask about it later, he shrugs, “Felt like reminding you.”

Seungcheol isn’t just THAT type of boyfriend—he’s the blueprint, the standard, and the reason your expectations are now irreparably high.

[na0koz]

Waiter!! More toxic Vi please!! :3

is this another series brewing oh gosh..i have much less ideas for vi than i do for jinx ngl guys

vi literally does not give a fuck about her health or safety. she gets herself in a mess at least once a week and relies on you to sort her out. she’ll show up to your apartment, drunk and bloody from the fight she likely started.

“heyyy..” she hiccups as she leans on your doorframe for support. you sigh and step aside to let her inside, it’s better keeping her inside rather than letting her roam the streets when she’s blackout drunk. she’s an angry drunk, punching anyone who breathes near her funny.

she stumbles into your apartment, probably tripping over your shoes by the door and eating shit in the hallway. you drag her up as best you can, she is very heavy after all, and manage to get her to the bathroom to clean her up.

she hiccups and groans every now and then, murmuring how she feels sick a couple of times. between this, she whispers how she loves you and she’s sorry for being like this. she appreciates you doing this for her, but she’ll never say it out loud (when she’s sober at least).

you wipe blood from vi’s mouth and her nose, muttering how she should stop fighting random people for no reason. alas, she doesn’t hear you and continues talking about how much she needs you and appreciates you. you know she’ll act like she never said anything of the sort in the morning.

you sigh before helping her into the clothes she left at your apartment a few weeks earlier, something she does to have a reason to come back to you after ghosting you for the millionth time.

you lay her in your bed, on your sheets, in your apartment for what feels like the thousandth time. you don’t know why she even comes her when she lives much closer to the bar she frequents.

she eventually falls asleep with a stern grip on your wrist after mumbling a few confessions of love. briefly, you think she’s telling the truth. i mean, maybe she was a little less drunk, some time had passed and she’d eaten something.

however, you’re reminded of why you aren’t supposed to trust violet when you wake up. an empty bed next to you, with the only trace of her ever being there was the slight crease in your sheets, loosely shaped to her muscular form.

she’ll be back in a couple of days though.

[r4fe-cam3ron]

SPECIAL EDITION | CHRISTMAS (BABY, PLEASE COME HOME) — truck driver!e. munson x reader

w; truckdiver!eddie au of course :D, does not follow st, mentions of pregnancy and sickness.

an; MERRY CHRISTMAS! this is my gift to you guys - i hope everyone has a safe and wonderful christmas. stay warm <3 thank you for all of your support!

An agitated huff leaves your lips when a - luckily - plastic ornament falls and bounces close towards the flannel couch. You stare at it dejectedly, walking closer towards the couch. Bending at the hips, you let out a small sound and wince before standing once again, hands landing on your belly. 

“You, little sir, better come soon.” You had till February until Grayson was welcomed into the world. Maybe you could wait a couple more weeks until he popped out.

You stare at the ornament quietly, pouting. It’s silly, getting upset over something that had slipped from your hand and rolled near the couch leg. And you would not call Wayne to walk out into the snow just to come pick up some plastic ball. 

Turning, you decide to plop down near the phone. Your feet prop onto the coffee table in front of you, your eyes landing on the television that plays some sort of commercial for JcPenney's. 

You groan when it comes on, turning your head towards the hallway and stare at the open door. You needed to wrap the last few of Eddie’s presents before he came home. 

He didn’t like leaving you - especially when it’s hard for you to even get up in the morning, let alone being sick every time you fix something to eat. 

Plus - it’s Christmas. Who wants to work on Christmas when you can spend it with loved ones instead? 

The phone ringing quickly catches your attention - you’ll get to wrapping after this phone call, knowing he couldn’t talk long. Reaching over, you quickly press the phone onto your ear. 

“Eddie?” 

“Hi, Mama. How are you?” The name is meant to be endearing, a scoff leaving your lips every time he calls you that jokingly. You need to get used to it was his excuse. 

“I’m okay. About cried over an ornament falling and rolling towards the couch,” You lean your head back. You can hear cars passing by. “This kid of yours is getting in the way.” 

“Well, he is my son,” You can hear the grin in his voice. “I’m sorry I’m not home though. Why didn’t you call Wayne to help put up the rest?” 

“And make the poor man trek through his snow and wind? No way. I’m not doing that to Uncle Wayne,” You shake your head to yourself. “Are you wearing a hat?” 

“Wh— Oh, yeah.” 

“Gloves?” 

“Mhm.”

“What about a scarf and your big, puffy jacket?” Your eyes squint suspiciously at the ceiling. 

“Sure.” 

“Edward Munson.” 

“Uh-oh,” He chuckles. You swore you could hear the chattering of his teeth over the phone. “Full government name. I’ve been bad, huh?” 

“You should not be standing outside in…probably only a flannel, small jacket, some combat boots, and whatever skinny jeans you packed,” You huff. “I don’t want you getting sick.” 

“I'm not going to, sweetheart,” He sounds soft, you could almost drift off to sleep and take a small nap. Wrapping presents. “If it makes you feel any better, I do have the beanie on.” 

“You need the other things on. Not just that,” You grumble. “Promise me you’ll put them on when you get into that truck.” 

“Okay.” 

“Promise me, Eddie.” 

“Okay. Okay. I promise.” He gives in. 

Your lips pull into a grin, nodding to yourself. You had won — again, of course. “Okay, great. Thank you,” You say. “One more question - how is it?” 

“Eh, it’s okay. Roads are a bit backed up since everyone’s traveling home for the holidays,” You frown and glance down at the magazine on the table, tugging at the hem of your shirt. You’re quiet for a moment until Eddie speaks up once again. “Where’d you go, sweetheart?” 

You glance towards the television when a song suddenly starts playing, your bottom lip pushing out slightly. It was one of your favorite Christmas songs - Christmas (Baby, please come home) by Darlene Love. 

The upbeat, happy song that usually had you dancing and giggling now has you tearing up from the words. “I’m here.” 

“What's wrong? Why are you—”

You let out a watery laugh, pressing the tips of your fingers into your forehead as your eyes shut. “I’m fine…I just miss you and this song is making it worse.” 

“The one you like?” 

“Mhm…” You stare at the television. “I’ll let you go, honey. Please, please, please put your jacket, gloves, and scarf on when you get into the truck. And be safe - no road rage either.”

“Me? Road rage?” 

“I’ve known you for 12 years, Eddie,” You deadpan. “Even when Wayne would drive us somewhere, you’d yell from the backseat.” 

He grumbles mostly to himself, but you smile softly. You miss his grumbling. “Okay,” He gives in once again. “I love you. Stay warm, okay?” 

“Okay…you too,” You say, turning towards the table. “I love you. Bye.” 

“Bye, sweetheart.” 

The line goes down and you place the phone back on the receiver, huffing as you scoot your way off the couch. You grab the remote, clicking the television off. Standing, you walk into the kitchen, yelping at the cold tiles and jumping slightly. Spotting Eddie’s slippers, you quickly walk over and push your feet into them before walking back to the fruit bowl. 

You grab a tangerine, the scissors, and tape before making your way into the bedroom. Sighing, you eye the flannels you’d picked out for him and some of his favorite cologne. You place a slice of fruit into your mouth, before settling onto the bed.  

—

Hours had passed, Eddie’s presents had been, not so delicately, placed under the tree. The warm colorful lights make the tinsel shine and you smile sleepily at how cozy everything feels - especially when you snuggle onto the couch with a heating pad and blankets, a couple of pillows pushed under your back. 

You’d made some sugar cookies as well - Grayson, of course, had a sweet tooth. So you had to make them. They're cooling on a plate in the kitchen now. 

You’d turned out the main lights, allowing the trailer to just bask in the warm glow of Christmas lights. The television was playing A Christmas Story - one of Eddie’s favorites and you feel bad for even watching it without him. The volume was down a couple of notches, the wind outside could be heard through the window - the chill of the air sneaking inside making you shiver slightly and pull the blanket higher under your chin. 

You’re comfortable. 

So comfortable you finally drift off after a long, hard day. 

You’re woken up by something brushing against your cheeks, eyes slowly opening. Your vision is a bit blurry and your neck hurts and you can distinctly feel drool slipping past the corner of your lips. Blinking away the heaviness, you can finally make out the wild curls and Eddie’s dimples. 

“Eddie?” You mumble. He chuckles, nodding. He did as he promised - put on the winter clothes you wanted him too. He slips off his gloves, and reaches a hand up, brushing the drool from the corner of your lips. 

“It’s me, sweetheart.” 

“When did…what?” You’re still confused, believing this was truly a dream and it was fake. There was no way Eddie was home, now, in front of you, looking at you as if you’d hung the moon and the stars in the night sky. 

He laughs softly. When you blink once again, his hands grip your cheeks softly, pressing a kiss to your lips. His plush lips were slightly chapped and freezing. You shiver slightly. 

He pulls away and grins at you. You can’t help but think about how cute he looks in that puffer jacket - the fur around the hood had a bit of snow slowly melting into it. The black beanie he wears tapers down his curls to his cheeks, covering his fringe and a bit of his brows. You know his hair is about to look insane. 

“How did you make it home so early?” You reach for him, pulling him close. He smells of his faded cologne and syrup with a hint of hot chocolate. 

“I broke a couple of laws,” He teases, hand landing on top of your stomach softly, thumb sliding back and forth slowly. “Kidding,” He quickly says when he catches the look you give him. 

“I was going to stop at a hotel about an hour ago, but realized how close I was. I decided to go ahead and come home to you because I missed you way too much to stay away any longer.” 

You press a kiss to his cold cheek, draping the blanket over him and pulling him even closer - as much as you could. He lets out a small laugh, kicking his shoes off. 

“You should’ve taken those off by the door.” You mumble, eyes sliding close once again when his fingers lift from your stomach to trace along your cheekbones. 

“I should’ve,” He whispers softly, now tracing above your eyebrow. “But you looked so cute and I had to give you a kiss,” You hum softly. 

“I also got you some hash browns.” His finger trails down the slope of your nose slowly before tracing over your lips. He smirks when one of your eyes open, peeking over at him. 

“Hash browns, you say?” 

“Mhm,” He nods. “Maybe some warm waffles as well.” 

“Have I told you I loved you?” 

“Once or twice.” He shrugs with a cute grin. 

“How about that I’m in love with you?” You open both eyes now, ready to demolish some greasy food. 

“Hm, that’s a new one I think,” He stands from the couch and walks towards the kitchen. He grabs the to-go plates and the cup. He makes his way back, holding them out. “Chocolate milk.” 

“Oh, yes,” He smiles as he watches you grab the food from his hands. You take a sip of the thick chocolate, groaning. “That’s so good. It’s the best chocolate milk I’ve ever had.”

He leans closer and presses a kiss to your forehead. “I know, baby. That’s why I got you some,” He lifts once again. “I’m gonna go stand under some hot water for a couple of minutes. You need anything?” 

You think but shake your head. “No, I’m okay. Thank you, honey.” 

“Okay. Shout if you need anything.” 

You nod and uncover the food, grabbing the plastic fork. Smiling, Eddie walks away, grabbing a sugar cookie as he passes. He steps into the bedroom, flipping on the light. 

“Eddie!” You shout, causing him to trip over his feet. He quickly runs out of the room, stumbling to a stop. 

“What? What is it? What happened?” 

You grin, watching his chest heave as his eyes glance around. “I just wanted to remind you to put your boots by the door.” 

He stares at you before squinting his eyes. “Was that necessary?” He walks over and grabs his boots, walking towards the door and placing them on the small rack. 

You shrug innocently, taking a sip of your chocolate milk. “You said to shout.” 

He hums softly, walking back towards the bedroom. “You’re lucky I love you!” He grabs some clean pajamas and a towel. 

“I am very lucky that you love me!” You call back. Eddie smiles and shakes his head as he closes the door. 

“Merry Christmas to me.” He whispers to himself. 

| tags — @oceanblvd111 ; @ali-r3n

| please do not copy my work! comments, feedbacks, reblogs, & requests are welcomed and greatly appreciated! ❅

| border — @/silkholland

[charliedawn]

Hi! Can I ask for a fic where the slashers have a reader nurse that acts like Kagaya Ubayashiki (from demon slayer) like there calm demeanour and there gentle and fluid manner of speaking.

They can handle criticism and honest about there weakness. The slashers manage to witness how the curse or illness spread to nurse reader each and every day.

The slashers reacting when finding out the real truth of there illness by eavesdropping to there conversation and admitting that they are slowing dying but still wanted to keep working and taking care of them because they care and love the slashers. Nurse reader still keeps working while now being blind and reassuring the slashers they still can handle it.

How would the slashers do now when they found out the truth of there sickness and nurse reader being blind. And nurse reader dies peacefully in there sleep while holding one of the slashers or Norman hand (like trying reassuring or comforting them that they won’t leave or there still here even tho they die) and smile in there sleep. How would there slashers react to nurse reader dying peacefully.

Btw I love your fics there both funny and amazing to read and entertaining I hope your doing well there Author take care 🥰🥰🥰🥰

Bubba noticed the first time you came into his cell and didn’t flinch at his appearance. Let’s be honest here, Bubba is a big guy and everyone who sees his very peculiar mask would at least be a little surprised.

But, you simply sat there—unbothered.

You were calm and even smiled at him. The fact that you were sick didn’t seem to actually matter at first since he didn’t care about you. You were just another nurse…

But then, you weren’t anymore. You started becoming the one who made it possible for his family to visit, who took care of him when he was hurt, who read him and the other slashers stories at night…He started caring because you cared.

And when it was time to say goodbye ? Bubba wasn’t ready. He knelt at your bedside and took your hand between his—crying and shaking as he begged you to stay.

"…My poor little lamb. I can already the black veils of death surrounding you. Slashers can feel Her. Death. And She is holding tight to your heart, dear child."

Hannibal Sr. is very perceptive. He knew from the start, he could smell Her. She was following you around and Hannibal Sr. knew that there was nothing to be done.

You were his favourite nurse. You were the one who gave his children’s gifts to him and who had never once flinched in his presence. He respected you…

When the time came, he took your hand and kissed the back of it.

"…Unfortunate child. Know that whatever time you spent on this Earth, you were good."

When you gave out your final breath, Hannibal Sr. closed his eyes and sighed. Such a shame…

Pennywise was at your door every night. He had tried to heal you—many times. But, his healing powers didn’t work on curses.

Hence, he thought that maybe by standing in front of your door every night, he could spook Death away.

"Not them…Not them..." He repeated over and over—hoping She would hear him. Or that Maturin would save you.

He begged and begged—him who had sworn to never beg for anything ever again—was now begging for your life. A human. A nothing…But if he was to save one person—it would be you.

When he knew there was no other way, he stayed by your side. He didn’t cry, but he held your hand and made jokes all night until he knew there was no laughter left in you. You were gone…

How dared you ? He was death. He was the boogeyman. You had no right to die. He hadn’t allowed it yet.

Michael stayed by your bed side, and you didn’t need your eyes to know that he was worried and didn’t want to leave you—afraid that if he was to close his eyes for even a second…you would disappear forever.

"Michael…It’s okay." You tried to tell him, but he wouldn’t listen to you. He started crying when he felt that death was inevitable and he held your hand in his.

You smiled at him.

"…I am glad…I got to meet you, Michael. You and everyone else."

Michael’s hand tightened around yours and he decided to get the mask off. Letting you see his face, knowing it wouldn’t change anything and then he whispered.

"…I…am…glad…too."

And then, your eyes slowly closed and Michael shivered as he felt your soul depart from your body. He stayed there hours later—holding your hand.

Freddy came the night he knew you were going to die. He wordlessly sat beside you and you felt him. You smiled.

"…Hi, Freddy."

Freddy was uncharacteristically silent. He looked at you and finally whispered.

"It is…tonight, Y/N."

You nodded.

"I know."

Freddy hesitated before taking your hand.

"…Are you scared ?"

You smiled.

"No. Not anymore…Not when I have a friend with me."

Freddy tried not to cry, but he couldn’t help himself. He sighed and replied with a broken voice.

"…I wish you were an asshole like me, ‘cause at least I’d be sure to see you in hell. But…I know this is goodbye and…I guess the only thing I can do is make sure you get the best sleep of your life tonight."

He put his hand on your eyes and you felt yourself fall into a dream…

You smiled.

"…Good night, Freddy."

He smiled back, even though his hand was shaking.

"…Good night, sweetheart."

"Hum…What do you mean you’re dying ?"

Eddie was taken aback at the news. He stared at you in disbelief for a moment before shaking his head.

"You can’t. That’s not…no. Come on. No." He had tears in his eyes as he took your hands in his and begged you to stay.

He had gotten used to you. You were the only one who knew who he really was. He cried next to your bedside and once you had left this world—he kissed the back of your hand.

"See you soon…Y/N."

Norman stayed awake for days-on-end to stay with you as much as possible. He cooked your favourite food, he played your favourite games and read your favourite books. He thought it would help once the time came. But, it didn’t. It was still so painful to watch when he saw how hard it was for you. He had to see you slowly lose your sight and lock yourself up in your room the days before the inevitable moment of death…

Norman *kisses your hand* : "…If I could die instead of you…I wouldn’t even hesitate to give you my life."

You kept working as a nurse for the slashers, providing for them and making sure that everything would run smoothly once you were gone.

[gladdygirl18]

Cheer Up, Sis!

Happy Holidays, everyone! Surprise @ficsandgiggles! I was your Secret Santa for SquealingSanta2024! I cannot tell you how happy I was when I got you; gave me a chance to write a Marvel/Avengers fic again after so long! I know we barely interact, but I do hope you love this fic as much as I did writing it!

This fic contains zero spoilers for any show or movie, so happy reading!

Theme for this fic: Classic cheer up tickles

Summary: Yelena feels like an outcast after being disconnected from reality and society all those years, and it's hard connecting to the rest of the Avengers, but never fear! Big sister Natasha is here to cheer up a pouty and upset little sister!

Word Count: 1800

⚠️Warning⚠️: mild swearing

How long has Yelena been trapped within the Red Room? How long has she been under the influence and control of that sick bastard General Dreykov? Far too long. All those years of mindless killing was dreadful; Yelena hated it. She felt like she was watching the world through someone else’s eyes, trapped within her own body, unable to stop herself. She hates herself for being so weak that she couldn’t resist the mind control of the Red Room. Yelena thought there was no way out of this hell. She needed a miracle; she needed a sign; she needed her sister.

As if her prayers were answered, Natasha came to Yelena’s rescue. After taking down the Red Room for good, the sisters, along with the other Red Room-controlled operatives, lived out the rest of their lives, finally free from the anguish, torment, and bloodshed. Natasha took Yelena to Avengers HQ to get her situated. The Avengers welcomed the younger Black Widow with open arms, knowing her from the stories Natasha would tell. They would talk about how much Natasha missed her, longed to see, and hold her again, and most importantly, how much she loved her. Hearing all this made Yelena hopeful for the future, that things could get better; that things could change. Oh, how wrong she was.

It’s been a few months since Yelena came to stay at the facility, and while she was well-adjusted to her new surroundings, she still felt distant from everything, and everyone. Whenever there were game nights or movie nights, she felt so disconnected. Being disconnected from reality and not having control over her mind for years upon years did her in; the lingering effects of Dreykov. She may be free but at what cost. Her childhood was practically snatched away from her and was forced to fight and kill, but not out of her own volition. Even now, she feels like she’s watching the world through someone else’s eyes and feels awful that she can’t connect with the other Avengers like she hoped she would.

It was Christmas Eve, and some of the Avengers—Peter and his friends included—were playing in the snow. Inside, Tony, Thor, Bucky, and Stephen were hanging Christmas decorations around the facility, getting ready for their annual Christmas party. The Avengers have a tradition of doing Secret Santa every year and everyone would exchange one gift when the clock strikes 12. Natasha encouraged her sister to join, but she respectfully declined. Now, Yelena was in her room, laying on her bed, watching the snow fall from her window. It reminded her of home; she felt like she was in a mini snow globe.

“Hey, have any of you guys seen Yelena anywhere?” Natasha asked.

“I haven’t, no,” Bucky said, “We’ve been hanging decorations all morning.”

The Black Widow sighed and turned her head away with concern contorted on her face.

“It’s snowing outside and…” Natasha began, “We used to play in the snow all the time back home. I just thought she’d want to go outside and play with me and some of the others… She’s just been so closed-off from everything lately… and everyone.”

Tony walked up to Natasha and placed a hand on his friend’s shoulder.

“Don’t stress over this, Nat,” Tony said, “She’ll come around when she’s ready.”

Natasha sighed and nodded before walking out of the living room. As Natasha’s walking to her room, she notices her sister’s door cracked open a bit. The Black Widow took a deep breath before lightly knocking on the door. Yelena’s head perked up to the sound before settling her head back on the pillows.

“Who is it?” Yelena asked.

“It’s Nat,” Natasha said, “Can I come in?”

Yelena sighed before humming her response. Natasha walked into the room and quietly shut the door, the room cloaked in a cozy darkness, the light from the afternoon sun illuminating the room. The Black Widow sat next to her sister and glanced at her. The younger woman wore a tired expression; many would assume that’s her “resting bitch face,” but no.

“Are you okay?” Natasha asked.

Yelena opened her mouth to speak but sighed and responded with a slow nod.

“Use your words, младшая сестра.” Natasha said softly yet sternly.

“I’m fine, okay?” Yelena retorted, a hint of malice in her words.

Natasha pulled back in shock as her shoulders slumped. The Black Widow stared out the window to see the snow softly fall, smiling to herself as she saw her and Yelena playing and rolling around in the snow. She was brought back to reality when she heard soft sniffling. Natasha glanced down at her sister and noticed small tears streaming down her cheeks.

“Yelena, what’s wrong?” Natasha asked, quickly sitting up her sister and hugging her.

When Yelena felt the warmth of her sister’s embrace, she pressed her face into her shoulder and sobbed softly. The Black Widow frowned as she held her sister close, slowing rocking her to calm her down.

“Am I… broken…?” Yelena asked suddenly.

“What? What, no,” Natasha answered quickly, “Why would ever think that?”

“Ever since you pulled me out of that God forsaken Red Room and brought me here… I haven’t been the same… I feel so out of place from everything, like I don’t belong in society anymore.”

Natasha felt her heart ache listening to her sister’s words. Dreykov’s influence really did a number on her, considering how long she was under his control.

“I want to be part of these little activities you and the other Avengers do, but I am so afraid of… fucking it up,” Yelena said sorrowfully, “I feel so… disconnected, from reality, society… and myself. It feels like I’m watching the world through someone else’s eyes and it’s scary…”

The Black Widow hugged her sister tight, trying to suppress her own tears.

“Yelena, I can assure you that you are everything but broken,” Natasha said, pulling away to see her sister’s face, “You are a smart, strong, and confident woman. Always have been, always will be.”

Yelena averted her sister’s gaze as she glanced down at the bed sheets. Natasha wanted to cheer up her sister, to remind her that she’s not broken. As Natasha scanned through her childhood memories, there was one thing the Black Widow remembered about her sister that would get her smiling every time. As Natasha repositioned her hands around her sister, she pounced, skittering her fingers all over Yelena’s sides. The younger woman yelped before giggling uncontrollably.

“Nahahahat! W-Whahahahat are yohohou doihihihing?!” Yelena asked through her giggles.

“Still as ticklish as ever, I see,” Natasha said, “But to answer your question, I’m cheering you up!”

The younger woman giggled as she tried to twist out of her sister’s grasp, but it was pointless; being a Black Widow, she knew how to handle people who squirmed around a lot.

“Natashahahahaha, plehehehease!” Yelena giggled, “No mohohohore!”

“Not until all of your poutiness is tickled away!” Natasha giggled.

The younger woman’s shoulders bounced as she giggled, trying to get out of her sister’s gentle yet firm grip.

“Ah, this brings back memories,” Natasha said, “I remember so vividly when you started to squirm around like this, I would grab your wrists…”

Natasha briefly stopped the tickling to grab her sister’s wrists with one hand.

“Pin you to the bed,” she continued, doing just that, “Straddle your waist.”

Keeping Yelena’s hands pinned above her head, Natasha straddled her sister, taking in the other’s attempt to escape.

“And once I have you right where I want you…” Natasha began, leaning in, “I… tickle you silly!”

She then started scribbling her hand all over the young woman’s torso with vigor, causing the other to buck and squeal with laughter.

“Nahahahat, nohohoho!” Yelena giggled, “Ahahahaha! This isn’t fahahahahair! Yohohohou’re bihihihigger than mehehe! Hahaha!”

“And you’re more ticklish than me,” Natasha retorted, “Evens out, don’t ya think?”

Yelena thrashed around as she tried to dislodge her wrist from her sister’s grip. When Natasha’s fingers found her belly, Yelena squealed and tried to turn away.

“H-Hehehehehey! Naahahahaha!” Yelena cried, “Not thehehere! Stahaahaap!”

“Are you gonna stop being mopey and enjoy the holiday festivities with me and the others?” Natasha asked.

When Yelena didn’t give and answer, Natasha started digging into the other’s ribs, causing the younger woman to snort.

“SHIHIHIHIHIT! NAAAHHAHAT *snort* THEEEHEHERE!” Yelena laughed, “NAAAAHAHAHAT! FUHUHUHUCKING STAAAAHAHAHAP!”

“Language, young lady,” Natasha teased, “And why would I stop? Your laugh is so cute!”

Yelena’s legs kicked behind the other as she laughed.

“Сестра, пожалуйста!” Yelena cried, “NO MOHOHOHOORE! IT TIHIHIHICKLES! AAHAHAHAHAHA!”

“Are you gonna spend Christmas Eve with the rest of us?” Natasha asked.

When Natasha pinched her middle rib, Yelena squealed loudly before dissolving into silent laughter. This was the Yelena Natasha missed. She missed this side of her sister, only seeing it a few times before their lives were changed; she was happy to see this smiling and laughing face again.

“OKAAHAHAHAHAY! AAHAHAHEHEHE!” Yelena wheezed, “I CAAAHAHAHAHAN’T!”

Natasha chuckled before releasing her sister and halting the tickles. Yelena panted like a dog as residual giggles spilled from her lips.

“You… ahahare so fucking ehehevil…” Yelena panted.

“But you love me all the same.” Natasha teased with a wink.

The younger woman scoffed and lightly punched her sister’s arm as she sat up. A peaceful silence fell between the sisters as Yelena caught her breath.

“You feel better?” Natasha asked.

Yelena hesitated to answer, but after pondering for a bit, the younger woman looked at her sister and nodded with a genuine smile.

“Yeah, I do,” Yelena said, “I feel… lighter, like a huge weight was just lifted. Thanks, Nat.”

“That’s what sisters are for.” Natasha said, placing her forehead on her sister’s.

Yelena smiled as she lightly bumped her nose with Natasha’s before they embraced. When they parted, Natasha stood up and pointed outside.

“There’s still a little bit of light left before the sun sets,” Natasha said, “Do you wanna play in the snow for a while?”

Yelena glanced at the winter wonderland outside her window and smiled as she turned back to her sister.

“Sure, that sounds like fun!” Yelena said eagerly.

Natasha grinned as she walked over to the door.

“Hey, Nat.” Yelena called out.

The Black Widow stopped in her tracks and turned around.

“Я тебя люблю.” Yelena said.

Natasha grinned as she opened the door.

“я тоже тебя люблю.” she said.

When Natasha left, Yelena sat back on the headboard and sighed, pulling one knee to her chest as she watched the snow fall. It will take some time for Yelena to get back into the groove of how things were before the Red Room, but with Natasha by her side to guide her, she doubts she’ll ever lose her way again.

[aishangotome]

Azel Radwan: Chapter 0

Thank you @caffedrine for providing the video for this chapter!

♡———♡

True love–for me, it’s the worst curse imaginable.

Azel: High Priest… Please… Stop it…

The whip gouges into human flesh, and the screams of my beloved brothers echo.

Blood drips from their torn-off nails, staining the cold floor crimson, forever burned into my eyes, once called mystical.

In this hideous scene, like a compilation of all the nightmares in the world, the powerless God could only cry out until his voice gave out.

Azel: Please, I'll do anything you say.

Azel: It's because I was a bad boy, because I didn't behave.

Azel: I won't ever run away again, so please stop.

Azel: Please, please, please, please…

Clinging to the High Priest’s clothes shamelessly, repeating words like a broken doll.

Being a God worshipped by people sounds nice, but the reality is different.

Head Priest: Living God… I apologize. It’s not that I want to torment you.

The High Priest gently strokes the God’s head with compassion and smiles soothingly.

In this nightmarish landscape, he alone is kind and gentle.

Head Priest: This is also love.

Azel: …Love?

Head Priest: The Living God is a special being. It would be too late if something were to happen.

Head Priest: To ensure your noble self makes no mistakes, I must punish you severely like this.

Head Priest: All of this is because I care for you. Please understand.

The whip cracks again.

My brothers, suspended from the ceiling, gradually lose their life force and become like dolls.

If this is what is called "love" – I am disgusted by its hideousness.

Azel: … I under…stand…

Azel: I understand… so… please stop…

-

Matias: Do you guys know the trending romance novel in Acroite lately?

The three kingdom's princes gather regularly, changing locations, and occasionally engage in small talk.

The content of their conversations varies from day to day, but on this particular day, the most unwelcome topic was brought up.

Kagari: I don't.

Azel: Not interested.

Matias: Then let me lend you my book.

Azel: Only Kagari can have it.

Kagari: No way. When it comes to this kind of story, Matias is uncontrollable.

Azel: Unfortunately, I'm allergic to romance.

Matias: Oh, is that so?

Azel: Yes, so—.......

Matias: Then let me read it aloud.

(…Hell just got even more hellish, give me a break)

Matias doesn't seem to want to back down and places the book in question on the table.

It was a very ordinary-looking book with no extravagance.

Matias: This book is so detailed in depicting the process of love's development that it's called the beginner's bible for romance.

Matias: I've read through it, and it's truly a treasure trove of information.

Matias: For example, there's a scene about a first date on page 32, and according to this bible—.....

While tuning out the rambling that has begun, I casually pull the book closer and flip through it.

(Ugh… what is this)

Just as Matias praised it, the content was a graphic depiction of the process of love.

There were many unnecessary parts for a story, and most of it was filled with idle chatter between the lovers.

Kagari: Was the allergy a lie?

Azel: It's not a lie. Look at these goosebumps.

Kagari: They certainly are real.

Azel: Matias might be yearning for love, but I'm the complete opposite.

Azel: Just hearing about love and romance makes me feel sick.

*remembering the past*

I recall the "love" preached to me that day with a merciful smile.

Just seeing the word makes me nauseous, and the aversion makes me dizzy to the point that I can't accept "love."

(Well, besides that crazy old geezer, there were plenty of people who preached about love with their crappy reasoning.)

(I wonder how Matias can believe in love so innocently…)

Matias: You're strange. There's no one who hates being loved, is there?

Azel: I'm a God, so maybe I'm different from humans.

Azel: … At the very least, I don't want to be loved by anyone, nor do I want to love anyone.

Azel: I know firsthand that love is a terrible thing.

I close the book and thrust it back at Matias.

There's no doubt that this is the kind of book I never want to open again.

Matias: There's no need to return it. This book is a present for you.

Azel: I don't want it, I refuse.

Matias: Don't say that. You might detest love and romance now, but you might change your mind.

Matias: Perhaps you'll meet your ideal princess in a scorching desert, on the verge of collapse, and after nursing her back to health, you'll become intimate—

Azel: Matias, please come back to reality.

Matias: Ahem. Anyway, it doesn't hurt to have a beginner's bible.

Matias: It covers everything from how to ask someone out on a date to how to handle relationships at night. You should study it diligently.

I can't help but glare at the book that Matias pushed back to me.

(Is it too much trouble to refuse?)

(Well, whatever. It's fine as long as I never open it.)

(Or… maybe I could sell it to Akatsuki.)

(I've had enough of being loved.)

-

(...Hm?)

Suddenly, I awaken to consciousness.

A landscape I've never seen before spreads out before me.

(Is this a rose garden? It's rather desolate for one, though.)

I've experienced the sensation of entering "someone else's dream" several times before.

I don't remember all of them, but I'm sure I've never met the owner of a dream with a rose garden.

(At least it's not the kind of dream someone from the desert would have.)

An oak table is placed where several paths intersect.

On top of it, there's a single book.

As I casually pick it up and follow the letters with my eyes, the story of the dream's owner vaguely flows into my mind.

Although it's an incomplete and fragmented story, the dream owner's "wish" is conveyed to me.

Azel: I see, I see…

Azel: How truly comical.

(A strong yearning for love… Are they the same kind of person as Matias?)

Someone approaches.

Glancing to the side, I see an unfamiliar woman standing there.

???: What is…?

Azel: I have some unfortunate news for you, who yearns for love and desires to know it.

Azel: Love isn't all that great.

Azel: Sometimes, it's better to live your life and die as the innocent, unknowing you that you are now.

(I don't intend to force my views on others, but…)

The woman looks genuinely kind; the type who would be the first to be taken advantage of by a swindler.

Precisely because I had that impression, the God, unusually, offered mercy.

Azel: I've seen the "love" of many people. Not in stories, but the raw, real love that exists in reality…

Azel: Many of them are people who believe they can do anything using "love" as an excuse.

Azel: It's a miserable thing, a human driven mad by love.

Azel: No matter how rational a person is, once they're driven mad by love, they can no longer live without it.

Azel: Like a curse.

(This woman who doesn't know love might become a different person if she does.)

(…I pray that won't happen.)

May the ugly curse of love not turn her into a beast—

The God, who can only pray, was as powerless as that day.

.

.

.

Chapter 1

If you’d like to support my translations, feel free to buy me a coffee here! :)

[thatguywhodoesstuff]

A Few Jhad Incorrect Quotes More

The long awaited(?) fifth installment of my Jhad Incorrect Quotes Series.

———

Thad: Did J just tell me she loved me for the first time?

Uzi: Yeah, she did.

Thad: And did I just do finger guns back?

Uzi: Yeah, you did.

———

Rebecca: I like your top, J!

Thad: (Jokingly) I have a name, you know.

J: (Pinches the bridge of her “nose”) *Sighs* Why? Why are you like this?

———

Thad: (Ecstatic) J and I got married!!

Uzi: Don't share your personal problems with everyone.

———

Thad: I'm so happy, I could kiss you!

J: Um...Neat.

(Later)

J: (Lying face down on her bed) I said "Neat," Uzi. Who the fuck says neat these days? It's not neat to say neat but I said it anyways because I'm fucking stupid.

Uzi: (Reading a book) Don't beat yourself up too much, J. Everyone gets nervous sometimes. Remember what I did when N confessed his love for me?

J: (Looks up) Didn't you thank him?

Uzi: (Closes the book and looks at the ceiling) I fucking thanked him.

———

N: Why is J crying on the floor?

V: She’s drunk.

N: And?

V: She saw a picture of Thad’s wife.

N: But… she’s Thad’s wife.

V: I know.

———

Uzi: I sleep with sick as hell railgun under my pillow.

Doll: Я сплю с ножом.

Thad: Both of you are so weird.

Uzi: (Cocks an eyebrow) Oh yeah? What do you sleep with?

Thad: J.

———

J: I can't take this anymore, someone needs to take me out!

Thad: In a dating type of way, or an assassination type of way?

J: I don't know, surprise me!

———

J: Do you want to explain the text you sent me last night?

Thad: It was autocorrect.

J: Autocorrect wrote "You're so hot. Please step on me."?

Thad: Yes.

———

Khan: (Sees J and Thad together) They're cute. I would put them on a boat.

Nori: (Caught off guard) You mean... you ship them?

———

Thad: Are we fighting or flirting?

J: Wha- I'm pinning you against a wall with my hand around your neck!

Thad: Your point?

———

J: (Rocket launcher at the ready) Get the fuck out!

Uzi: (Unfazed) What's up your ass this morning?

Thad: (Groggily walks in) *Yawn* ...Hey.

Uzi: Hmm... never mind. (Runs out of the pod to tell the others)

J: WAIT NO!

———

Darren: So... I've seen you've been spending a lot of time with J recently.

Thad: No, Darren, it's not what it looks like, I swear.

Darren: Oh really? So no reason for me to be jealous?

Thad: No! You're the only one for me.

Darren: Is that so?

Thad: I promise! J and I are just dating, okay? She’s my girlfriend.

Darren: So there are no best-friends-feelings involved?

Thad: You are still my one and only best friend! She’s just the love of my life, nothing more!

Darren: But I'm still the platonic love of your life, right?

Thad: Of course bro!

Darren: (Takes off his sunglasses, teary-eyed) Bro...

J: (Deeply confused) What the…?

———

Thad: Talk dirty to me, baby~

J: The dishes.

Thad: Wh-

J: They've been there for 4 days and it's your turn to wash them. You still haven't cleaned them and I have asked you to do so several times.

———

(J comes home absolutely drunk, undresses, and stands in Thad’s bedroom.)

Thad: Babe, are you… coming to bed?

J: No thank you, I'm sure you're lovely but I have a boyfriend.

(J falls face first on the ground and immediately falls asleep)

Thad: (Shakes his head)

———

N: If you want my advice-

J: No offense but you're the last person I want relationship advice from. You tried to kill your girlfriend. Multiple times.

N: First off, that was before we started dating. Secondly, she’s also tried to kill me.

Uzi: It's true. It was mutually attempted murder.

———

J: Time sensitive question how flirt boy.

Uzi: Throw rocks at he.

Lizzy: Hot Dogs.

Doll: Убей его.

J: Thanks guys.

———

J: I love you.

Thad: I love you too. I've waited so long to hear you say that.

(They kiss passionately)

V: (To Uzi) You owe me 20 dollars.

———

J: Thad, you love me, right?

Thad: Normally I'd say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere I won't like.

———

J: (Comes out of the changing room wearing silk pants) How does this look?

Thad: Like it slips on and off really easily.

J: (Blushes)

Thad: (Blushes) No, I didn't mean it like that-!

Lizzy: (Teasingly) We know what you meant~

———

Cyn/The Absolute Solver: Did you take out Thad as I requested?

J: Thad has been taken out, yes.

Cyn/The Absolute Solver: Giggle. Excellent, now to-

J: It was a great restaurant. We had a romantic candlelit dinner and Thad proposed afterwards, we're filing the wedding papers.

Cyn/The Absolute Solver: ಠ_ಠ

———

Thad: (Smiling proudly) Well, J and I finally did it!

The Rest of the Squad: *Gasps, shocked expressions, etc.*

Thad: That's right... We kissed!

The Rest of the Squad: ಠ_ಠ

———

J: I don't need to go to bed. I'm not tired, I'll be fine.

Thad: But, babe, I'll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again.

J: (Flustered) O-oh. Well… Wait. Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns?

Thad: …Is it working?

———

J: You look good in that hoodie.

Thad: You know where else l'd look good?

J: (Zero hesitation) My bed.

Thad: (At the same time) By your side- Wait, what?

J: (Blushing and averting her gaze) Nothing!

———

Thad: Bro-

J: No, no, hold up, rewind. My tongue was down your throat just a second ago and now you're calling me bro!?

———

[kaiserkisser]

can someone nice (!!) please please please adopt me im begging you im requesting you (huge word vomit and vent in tags, pls dont read if u dont want to!! and if you don't want this stuff on this blog PLS lmk!! i dont wanna make anyone uncomfy! )

[skrunksthatwunk]

idk if i've discussed it before (i have certainly THOUGHT about it) but someone on my kuwa suffering ep 89 comp mentioned it and i just had to go off about it like. ok. sensui tells yusuke something along the lines of "you heard itsuki" when itsuki's inside the uraotoko, implying that not only can sensui hear those inside the uraotoko, but that he expects yusuke to be able to as well. which means that yusuke Almost Certainly Heard And Kind Of Ignored kuwabara's prolonged mental breakdown and wailing about how much he needs yusuke to live etc. which. guHHH i hate him yusuke you ass but also listen.

the only acknowledgement yusuke gives to this (if any) is when he says something like "sensui you're sooo fucking cooked this plan's going perfectly (my friends are going to get strong and kill you when i die)." he's trash talking to sensui, ignoring the others because, i think, he doesn't want to acknowledge what he's doing to them.

yusuke is explicitly recreating the experience he had with kuwabara's "death" at the hands of toguro, complete with the announcement of intent (and power) to kill, the inability to impede the threat in any way (barring a power-breakthrough), and the target in some way racing towards/volunteering for their death. yusuke learns through doing, and through tough love-style approaches. it's only effective if it hurts. watching kuwabara die like that was devastating to yusuke, but it sure as hell fucking worked. he beat toguro because of that maneuver. so even if he has to (re-)traumatize his friends in the process, this method will make his friends stronger, and he feels confident in that. but he never had to live with the consequences of kuwabara's death, not really. that's something hiei makes clear before they enter the cave as well, that there are no fake-outs ready to make him or anyone else stronger. the only deaths here will be real. the only power gained will come at a high, permanent cost. hiei's warning is an attempt to keep everyone alive, to keep yusuke from being stupid. and then yusuke decides to take that fatality into his own hands, but it's kind of his friends who would pay the price. he's going to make them live through the days, months, years without him, the actual permanency of loss (assuming they survive for that long), something he never experienced with kuwabara (a new facet of that traumatic scenario), AND he's escaping the emotional fallout of this choice through death. he doesn't have to see them mourn, won't get yelled at, won't watch them fail to move on. he's tapping out and choosing to believe they'll be fine.

but i think he feels guilty. just a little. i mean, yusuke couldn't even believe that people cared about him enough to want him alive in episode one. he's staked everything on his friends, which means he still kind of... doesn't value his own life, at least not compared to theirs. but he believes his friends love him and want him around, and we know that because he has to, or else he wouldn't make a plan that depends entirely on that love. he is actively leveraging the care he doesn't think he deserves, trying to hurt them in a way he is intimately familiar with (only worse), for.... what, exactly?

this is kind of my sticking point tbh. i don't think the answer is... super clear, but let's start with what it's not.

yusuke is not doing this because it is the most practical way to save all of humanity; that would be the mafukan, which he stopped. it could be a gamble to save all of his friends? the mafukan strategy would guarantee koenma's death/eternal imprisonment, whereas this strategy gambles all of humanity on the chance that his friends come out of the Easy Break Oven strong enough to avert the end of the world. if the sacrifice of even one friend is completely intolerable, perhaps he'd accept those slim odds and their steep consequences. yusuke tends to take risks like that, especially when he's got fight-induced tunnel vision. he doesn't think things through too much; his schemes are usually dependent on surprising his enemy enough to oneshot them. truthfully, i think this is the closest we'll get to an answer, and it's a more conventional one for this kind of story. but there is another layer i haven't been able to get from my mind.

i think yusuke is gifting each of his friends an honorable warrior's death.

so, in case it needs saying, yusuke, kuwabara, kurama, and hiei all (at least once, if not several times) exhibit a desire to die in combat in a way they deem noble to give their lives purpose (usually by self-sacrifice, but sometimes by another metric of honor, like hiei's duel with shigure and his desire to die in mutual defeat against an evenly matched opponent; or even kurama's decision to fight shigure in his human form, displaying a sort of passive suicidality via placing being true to himself in this (somewhat symbolic/inconsequential) way over survival). they need to make their lives count for something, because they feel guilty for being alive (kurama and hiei feel guilty for their past actions (hiei's is most evident in his distance from yukina, though that's not its primary reason), hiei, kuwabara, and yusuke have all been ostracized and made to feel like burdens on/unwanted by their caregivers and general society; all four of them have felt profound isolation even from their loved ones (yusuke and hiei are rather obvious; kurama can never tell his mother about the majority of his life nor what she truly means to him in the context of it; and kuwabara is separated from his peers for his spiritual awareness and his "stupidity" (plus his parents aren't around? and he is Desperate to define manhood/manliness through a broader pop cultural one which includes the warrior sacrifice thing bc he has no male role models BUT that's for another post) (i will admit kuwa's the most tenuous one here irt isolation)). they want to die for a cause so badly it's actually physically painful to me. it is passive suicidality, and they define their lives and identities by their relation to, engagement with, and skill at doing violence, etc. they live to die by the sword. anyway. nobody talks about it but i think it's very important to understanding what yusuke's doing here.

because i think he knows that about himself and his friends. they're kindred spirits. at the very least he knows this about kuwabara, who literally made a speech about this before diving into toguro's fingers In The Event That He Is Recreating Explicitly. he is dying nobly like they all want to on the chance that they'll get to break out and fight sensui rather than dying without even getting to take a swing. it's about his pride and theirs. but i don't think yusuke necessarily believes they'll win. he knows better than anyone how strong sensui is, and how wide the gap is between sensui and team urameshi. his stated position that humanity is doomed and that he doesn't care about its fate is, i think, not completely genuine, but if we take it at face value, he's not killing himself so that his friends can survive the end of the world. something's going to come around and kill them eventually. he's doing it so they can survive long enough to fight sensui. he needs them (specifically kuwabara) to be strong enough to free themselves to begin round two. but he's given up on their side winning, on humanity surviving, on his own victory---why should he think his friends are capable of winning? this could be another case of yusuke's fight-blinders. it could be another gamble, more blind faith put in his friends. but honestly it reads more to me that yusuke's giving them a chance to die together on the battlefield. them winning would be great, but it's not his goal. it's a pipe dream.

he knows he's going to be killed. they're probably going to be killed, too. but to make it so they last a little longer against sensui, to make the odds a little more even, so they are killed not like livestock, but like worthy fighters, he'd die a little faster. it's the best kind of death someone like them can have; and he'll deprive himself of it just to make their ends a little sweeter. even if the road to that is far more bitter.

but it's not like yusuke's friends know what he's thinking or agree to it, and he can't exactly make his case for it in the moment. he's making that choice for them. whatever his intentions, whatever odds he thinks they have of beating sensui, he's kind of sealing all of their fates. so how the hell is he supposed to acknowledge kuwabara screaming at him not to die, trying desperately to express what yusuke means to him in what could be their final moments together? this plan is going to hurt his friends terribly. it is already doing so, and he can hear it. his choices to stop koenma from using the mafukan and to die for his friends' strength are both selfish in some way, no matter how you read the scene. if yusuke comforts kuwabara, he might not get strong enough. if he twists the knife, well... how could he forgive himself? and either way by responding he would have to face them all and say yes, i'm doing this regardless of your feelings (with the intention of hurting you). so i think he does what he often does. he avoids it. he lets that emotion glance off him and his bravado and his one-liners so he doesn't have to deal with the fact that he's hurting people, that he's scared and guilty and unsure of himself. that he's about to die again, about to put kuwabara through the grief he saw at his wake again, only worse; about to put his quieter friends through something similar.

yusuke is confronted with the responsibility one has to the people who care for them, and he runs from it in an attempt to give them some small peace. just like when he died before and thought hey, at least my mom and keiko won't be burdened by me anymore. because the only thing he can really do for them is die.

[pinkseas]

hearing "how are you feeling? are you getting enough sleep? are you taking anything for it? are you drinking water?" from the besties: 🥺🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭😭🥰🩷❣️💓💗💝💘💖💕💞🙏💝💖💘💕💞💗💓❣️🩷🥰💘🥰🥰🩷💞🥰💞🩷💞🩷💕❣️💘❣️💘❣️💕🥰💗💓💖💗💗💝💗🙏💞🥰💕🥰💘🩷❣️💘🩷💗🩷💗🩷💕💓💞🥰🥰🥰🥰🥺🥺🥺

hearing "how are you feeling? are you getting enough sleep? are you taking anything for it? are you drinking water?" from your parents: 😐😐😐😐💀🙄💥😬💥💀🙄💀😐😒😐💀🙄💥😬💀😬🙄💀😐😒🙄💀😬💥😬💥🙄😬😒💀💥💥💀💀💥😬💥💀😬💀😐😒😒😐😐💀💥💥💀💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥

[look-at-the-stars-tonight]

the amount of effort that goes into figuring out what to cook and eat every day is RIDICULOUS. i used to think people were so weird and boring for eating the same thing every single day but it truly does make life so much easier

[clavissionary-position]

I would like to welcome another eternal wip to the family of eternal wips

I think I drew Emma's bangs parted the wrong way ahaha… <- a person who really sucks at making Emma look Emma-like

[aviangrian]

thank god chappell roan didn’t release good luck babe in summer 22!

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

………… thinking evil thoughts

[beegswaz]

I MISSED BUG. BEING CORRECT ABOUT WHEATLEY..???? WHY IS THE WORLD SO CRUEL.