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judesmoonbeauty · 4 months ago

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Jude Jazza's PV Dissection ☾.

Beneath the cut for event and other suitor's route spoilers. This is just for fun, and please feel free to kindly share what you think! To be honest, I don't think I have anything interesting to add, but here goes it...

My First Thought: Let’s just state the obvious and say that Jude’s route is going to be ANGSTY and WILD!!! That much is definite by watching the PV, and that’s pretty much what we see in his events as well. The animation was beautiful. There’s a A LOT of recycled CGs, and majority of his lines come from his gacha cards and bond stories, but it gets the job done.

However, I feel like Jude is still very much under wraps. His PV barely gave us anything to go on that we don’t already know about, or haven't theorized. I’ve watched it like 15 times. I counted the number of hands on the clocks to see if there were 13 (there’s not), and paused to search the outline of Big Ben, and things like the shadows to see if something was hinted or hidden, but nothing.

Of course, that doesn’t mean it didn’t give us anything at all, but before we get into that, let’s just recap the premise of Act 2:

In Act 2, Kate has already been the fairytale keeper for one full week, and that’s when Vogel enters the picture with the claim that they want to be “friends” with Crown. Harrison knows that they’re lying about something, and Darius, as we learn, is looking for “family members.”

Now…..

Tick, Tick, Tick, Tick, Tick - The ticking clock is very prominent in his trailer, and that makes sense because Jude’s fairytale curse is associated with time. His icon is an hourglass, and he is very cognizant in events/routes about wasting time. Additionally, it’s interesting to note that several of Jude’s events often mention specific lengths of years that have passed, such as, Dark IF, GHR, Island Lust, and a bond story.

As far as the PV goes, I think it may be hinting that Jude is running out of time in the sense of accomplishing a goal, which will in turn fulfill a promise. Our average life span today is about 80 years, but back then it was much shorter, and I feel like Jude needs a lot of time to accomplish what he is doing. It could be that a single lifetime is not enough for him to accomplish it, but he is going to try anyway. Such as? Him traveling to the moon. I feel like the PV points to this at the outset with that giant full moon behind Big Ben. I think this may be a CG we get.

Conversely, it could be that he is running out of time in the sense that he is dying of an illness. We know for a fact that he suffers from seasonal asthma (which is triggered with enclosed spaces filled with smoke), he smokes himself, but he also suffered from childhood malnutrition, and that can cause a lot of issues. Still, I don’t know how strong of a theory this is as Jude has no problem with physical exertion or activity……not looking at that one other gut I love in IkePri.

Additionally, a part of me feels like he’s just tired and he wants to die. To be honest, all these guys have some kind of death wish in one form or another, but in terms of Jude, Ellis said that he looked like he was going to fall into the river as he looked at the moon while chain smoking, and Roger said Jude looked like he was vacantly staring at the moon as if he had given up on something.

Notably, in Roger’s past records, we learn that Jude uses cigarettes to fuel his rage to keep him living, and Kate also mentioned in his Cruise Liner event that anger is a great motivator.

So, for all intents and purposes, Jude is being kept alive by his own rage, cigarettes, the promise he made, and Roger. THANK YOU ROGER! That’s what I feel at least.

Rewinds/Record Scratches: I think glitchy rewind/record-scratching sound is being cleverly used to note the different tones we are going to see in his route, like I mentioned before, it’s going to be angsty and wild (that’s what I feel anyway).

However, I will say that a part of me feels like it’s a nod to all the times he says things like, ‘once you’ve lost something, you can’t get it back.' How many of us wish we could rewind and do things over or see someone we’ve lost again, even if it were just for a minute?

Jude said in Roger’s route that once someone is gone those left behind are stuck feeling a void, and I think he’d do whatever he could to rewind time if that were in his power. However, cue that jazzy music and we find ourselves in the interior of a…..

Warehouse: No doubt by the docks that Jude frequents for deliveries, and while it’s nothing major, it does indicate one of the settings we will likely be at. Although, this is pretty obvious to most of us because in both his first event and his one year anniversary event, they are at the warehouses by the docks.

Personally, I loved the detail of the seagulls, not that is important in anyway, but I just got excited to see a visual of it instead of just imagining it. However, I am hoping to see something different in terms of what we’ve already seen in both of those events. Kate getting caught by someone who broke their contract with Jude or is after Jude, and she is caught in the middle. Is that too much to ask?

Papers: We quickly shift to an office like space, whether this is located at Raven or at Crown, there is something very important to note in this scene, and that’s not only the rows of books behind our clever mobster, but the bulletin board that has notes stuck all over them.

At first, I thought that this could be business plans, product information or designs, business targets, or information about the personal lives of those whom Jude makes contracts with. Ultimately, I think that these are engineering designs and research papers that he’s written and/or reviewed for……moon travel. If you look closely, one paper in particular has a definite design on it.

Why am I so hellbent on this? Because Jude says himself in his bond levels that he’s trying to nab all the researches and scientists that he can as quickly as possible, and that he was going to have Ellis look into the authors who wrote the papers he had been reading. On a random note, I don’t think this would be his office space at Raven, but his personal office or room at Crown.

About that Bridge Scene: You know, the one where he looks completely over this shit as he smokes a cigarette? Then all of a sudden he shoots you that look like he’s gonna tear you up because he’s annoyed, and you’re like: Impregnate me, please? That one. So, the night that Ellis met Jude, Ellis said that he was standing on the bridge looking like he was about to fall into the river.

I believe this may be the second CG we may get of Jude in his route, and I want to know why he goes to the bridge? Is there special meaning to it? Did he visit that place with his loved one? Was a promise made under the moon? Is this were he wants….things to end? And forgive this last bit, but I can’t help but think of the song ‘Moon River’ when he’s at that bridge.

Ah, to hell with it, It’s too pretty not have posted again:

How long: When we get to the scene of Jude and Kate in a somewhat awkward rain scene (I agree with my friends, her sprite looks out of place), he asks Kate how long she is planning to stick next to him. Here again, we have a form of time being hinted at, and Kate’s time with Crown should end in three weeks time.

Still, we don’t know how far along we are in his route when he asks her this question, so it’s difficult to say how much time Kate has remaining with him at this point. What we can guess is that she’s been at Crown long enough to have seen Jude do horrendous things - all of Crown - for that matter.

Additionally, she will have seen the filthy underbelly of England at that point, perhaps in the form of drugs, SA, human-trafficking and the like, if his events are any indication of that. Not to mention his cruel attempts to force her to give up on being fairytale keeper. So, how do you think Kate will answer, and will her answer disrupt his plans??

Unhinged, Possessive, Obsessive Jude: Is he really though? I think so. This is what I think will be the third CG - belonging to his Mad Love End. Did you all see those eyes??? He is UNHINGED, and I am HERE for it. I think it really drives home the point too that he is going to make her pay for placing a curse on him for the rest of her life - that’s Judese for - I’ll make you pay for making me love you for as long as you live.

Seeing him that expression in his eyes and the way he plays with her hair, (this is also a thing Jude does in his events), really exemplifies the phrase that he also uses in that their being together is madness.

Thinking about it, it really wasn’t until the Island Lust story that we started to see a small glimmer of Mr. Jazza’s jealousy, and that’s because Jude is often cold and controls any emotions that could be linked to her romantically. But we slowly start to see this change with Island lust, I gushed how he didn’t like Kate thinking about the other Crown members when he was near her, and in effect, ignoring him.

In the Jude vs. Nica event, we got even more of his jelly side when he learned that Kate and Nica are on a first name basis, even though they just met. CUTEST THING EVER.

And finally, in his Dark Mafia card, Jude is ready to commit murder over the guys who are looking at Kate. So, I’m really looking forward to seeing how jealous or possessive he may get once he gives into his feelings.

Pocket Watch: The time shows at 10:10 pm. Is this significant? I can’t say for sure, but there is nothing odd about the pocket watch itself. The only thing I noticed is that the hands on the pocket watch aren’t moving.

That doesn't necessarily mean anything, but let’s throw out a random idea I had about the watch actually being broken. It doesn’t work. The time stopped at exactly 10:10 pm, perhaps some incident happened during that time when it stopped, and Jude wears it as a memento. Ultimately, I don’t place too much stock in this because there's really no basis for it, but let's say we've covered our bases with this and move on to the last, but certainly not least...

My Evil (or sin), is an unfulfilled promise: His tag line at the end��.I don’t believe this is related to Jude’s fated demise. I have an inkling that Cybird may go the Disney route for his fate, but that can be a discussion for another day….maybe. What I do believe is that this emphasizes Jude’s compellation to pay back an unfulfilled promise (essentially what amounts to a betrayal).

I don’t feel that he MUST pay back betrayals that others experience, but if he is involved in a case in some manner of speaking (like for missions), Jude has been known to carry out revenge, such as he does to Anne’s father in GHR. Also, in the "Evil Behind the Scenes" event, Jude allows the husband of the wife who was unfaithful take care of things behind closed doors (it said it was supposed to be talking, but Ellis was in the room too, and who knows what the husband did). It’s interesting, because Jude mentions that while he has no interest in harming women, betrayal must be repaid, so whatever happened happened.

This would make sense as to why Jude does everything he can to fulfill his own promises. But, what if he fails to keep his own promise……what happens then? Hope to find out soon.

That's all I could dig up. They really gave us nothing, but everything at the same time?

Honorable Mention: No eye Kate...please stop treating my girl this way cybird!

#jude jazza #ikevil theories #C's corner #Ciele's Rambles #ikevil spoilers #ikevil jude

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tossawary · 10 months ago

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Thinking about the actual living arrangements between Wu Yanzi and Shen Jiu is interesting, because I would think that Wu Yanzi should be more than a little concerned that his new apprentice might decide to turn that bloody sword on him sooner or later.

Putting this below a cut because I'm talking about child abuse here.

You can come up with all sorts of angsty, abusive behavior for Wu Yanzi on the premise that he's afraid of what Shen Jiu might do, simpler examples being things like "he might have made Shen Jiu sleep outside if he was ever taking a room at an inn" and "he might have regularly taken all of Shen Jiu's belongings away because he couldn't 'trust' his disciple with them". More extreme, antagonizing examples being things like "he might have tied Shen Jiu up at night like a dog" or "he might have planted some kind of talismans that prevented Shen Jiu from coming near him or from leaving a small space". He might have even been "matter of fact" about it. Not obviously taking pleasure in a "necessary measure".

I don't think Wu Yanzi treated Shen Jiu like complete shit all the time, I think it probably would have depended on his moods, as it does with many abusers. I just think it's interesting to think about why exactly young Shen Jiu was "terrified to death" of this person. There has to have been a line of "worth putting up with this to learn some cultivation techniques" keeping Shen Jiu from deciding to just risk it and try to kill Wu Yanzi (the line ends up being Yue Qi at the Conference).

It's possible that Wu Yanzi treated Shen Jiu kind of okay most of the time, actually, trusting in his young apprentice's fear without relying on any kind of physical abuse. At the beginning, Wu Yanzi is something of a cultivator and Shen Jiu is not. By forcing Shen Jiu to participate in his foul crimes, he makes it harder for Shen Jiu to leave him, because now Wu Yanzi can threaten to TELL PEOPLE what Shen Jiu has done. And seeing Wu Yanzi kill people in horrific ways such as the Cursed Black Light talismans functions as a very effective threat by itself. "Behave or I'll kill you," is probably all the rope that Wu Yanzi would need to tie Shen Jiu up at night, honestly, stopping his apprentice from killing him in his sleep. Verbal threats and abuse are more than enough, especially when said by an actual murderer.

I think it's interesting to think about the different ways that abuse manifests, and how the different styles of abuse from Qiu Jianluo and Wu Yanzi might have affected Shen Jiu. We don't see a lot of Shen Jiu's life with Wu Yanzi, so we don't know whether or not his behavior was playfully cruel or tersely paranoid or coldly detached. It's easier to draw links between Shen Jiu's abusive treatment of Luo Binghe and Qiu Jianluo's abuse of Shen Jiu.

Anyway, I was thinking about this because I was thinking about more Canon Divergence AUs for Qijiu. Like, what if, after killing Qiu Jianluo, Shen Jiu gets a taste of what his life will be like under Wu Yanzi and throws caution to the wind to murder this guy? He desperately wants to learn cultivation, yes, but he doesn't want another master. Maybe there's some bounty on Wu Yanzi's head and Shen Jiu decides to take it, and hopefully leverage the kill as his legitimate entrance into the cultivation world?

I'm wondering how easy it would be to somehow get Shen Jiu to Cang Qiong Mountain Sect when Yue Qi has been trapped in the Ling Xi caves. I don't think that Shen Jiu would be happy about Yue Qi's imprisonment at all. That could end up being a very dramatic rescue.

#tossawary svsss #fic ideas #wu yanzi #shen jiu #yue qingyuan

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necrotic-nephilim · 4 months ago

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If I may ask, what is your top 10 fics(excluding the Slade/Steph fic)?

oooh, yes! (obligatory rec of the above-mentioned SladeSteph fic by the lovely @kevin-day-is-bi tho bc it's so worth a read for anyone who hasn't read it) most of these are Batcest related, but there are a couple of gen fics as well that really hold a special place in my heart

In The Company of Monsters - this is a No Capes AU dystopian DamiTim fic that is unfinished but. god i can never not recommend it. i've liked this fic longer than i've liked Batcest, this fic used to be my "okay i dislike the ship but this is my exception". i adore how Damian and Tim are written, i adore the world building, this is just. my roman empire.

Robins And Other Flightless Birds - a mostly genfic that follows a Bruce without a Batfamily just. adopting members of the Batfam across the multiverse who were never saved. Dick is a Talon, Tim is Joker Junior, etc. i usually don't go for Good Dad Bruce fics, but there's something so special about this fic and how it writes Bruce struggling to adjust to having kids with no experience bc he craved a family.

The Music We Make is Unnatural - this was written as a gift for me in the JayTim exchange by the lovely @rottenapricots and GOD is it everything i could've asked for. for such a short fic it packs a wonderful punch exploring the premise of Jason who never died and Tim who's Ra's' apprentince. it has so many JayTim tropes i love while still being something unique and special on its own.

props - this is a series and it's long, but god is it gloriously fucked up. this surrounds mostly JayBruTim, where Jason and Bruce solve their uses by using Tim as a toy between them, and then the aftermath of Dick finding out. it's so good. this series just lives rent free in my brain and i cannot recommend it enough to dead dove enjoyers.

all the men and women merely players - a Tim-centric fic that explores Tim being self aware and breaking the fourth wall, but from a very whump/angsty perspective. i adore fourth wall breaking that feels more like psychological horror as a character struggles to grip that their reality is malleable and out of their control. and this fic does it SO well.

I Know What My Brother Is - a Reverse Robins DamiTim fic that has everything i adore about RR and DamiTim in one place. their dynamic, the sexual exploration, everything in this is just top notch and i truly adore RR!DamiTim.

Keep you warm - JayDickTim fic with Talon!Dick and Omegaverse. this really delights me bc there are just so many layers to how this relationship builds and how these three end up together despite a lot of initial rocky territory.

Catch me low - this fic was recommended to me recently and i'm still just starting it, but i adore the concept already. this has DickTimJayBruce and Jason universe hopping to "make things right" in a very fun dead dove kind of way.

When You Move I'm Moved - a TimKon PWP that explores just how far you can reasonably take TTK. and god is it everything to me. the smut is so good and all the kinks just. hit the spot. i want to chew on this fic.

one life for the many - this is a dark BruTim fic that's very short but has a special place in my heart for exploring my favorite sort of BruTim dynamic where Tim considers the risks of being Robin and ends up ina sexual relationship with Bruce reluctantly. it's just so good and i love Tim's internal logic.

also an honorable mention to a fic that's not DC, but an MHA ShinBkau fic i regularly reread, NyQuil™. i just have a soft spot for adult AU ShinBaku fics even tho i don't read MHA much anymore. it's so crunchy to me.

#necrotic answerings #fic recs #all of these are so worth reading #i enjoy both longfics and oneshots #there's just so much good food in this fandom #if i ever get into fic binding i'm definitely binding a few of these bc they're so good #but ty for asking i always love promoting works by other writers!!#we have so many talented writers in this community. 10/10

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barblaz-arts · 6 days ago

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Thank you for taking my ask so seriously!!!! A lot of people would have just said no and move on, but now you've activated my secret infodumping card >:3

First of all, I went through the notes and I promise you the comic isn't as angsty as the premise makes it out to be. A very central theme is friendship, and connection, and how relationships can save us even in the worst times. These guys are already dead and they're finding time to have group hugs and blood pacts <3 they're so stupid n I care them a lot 💖💖💖💖

And all the characters have such fun designs!!! They're all very distinct and full of personality, with very fun interactions, and I genuinely think you'd have a blast putting those beasts in situation. Since their personalities are so unique the fandom (me) looooves making silly little aus where they can do whatever and not. Yk. Fight for their lives.

The art is great and the whole world building with the spectre forms (kind of similar to the full demon forms from hazbin) are genuinely so cool and so fun to speculate about, and wonder what else is going on in the very vast world of the story.

But, ultimately, the best part is the lead romance. And girl. If you like couples who are devoted to each other Annabel Lee and Lenore are the best thing to ever happened. That devoted that's leaning into "Oh there might be something toxic goin on here!!!!" They have burnt down houses, trapped friends in walls, and almost fell of balconies for the other. Absolutely bonkers bananas.

They're honestly what makes the comic so if you think they're not your style idk if it's going to be an enjoyable experience. There's also some bloody scenes (ex: someone's eye getting scarred) but they never get gory, and some heavier themes (esp madness and the condition of women in the early 1900s).

Soooooo idk. I'm mostly sending this ask bc I love being in the same fandoms as you and hearing your takes :D

I mean, both my hyperfixations are on hiatus rn and there aren't lot of content for them anymore, so why not? I could try other media while im waiting.

Ngl the toxic element im hearing about the romance isn't pulling me in all that much cuz I'm not a big fan of that. I'm more for wholesome shit. But the plot itself does interest me. Especially the spectres. I love seeing transformations.

And im fine with gore so long as it isn't straight up, idk, torture porn. I've ended up seeing some nasty shit because of previous hyperfixations lmao the most violent media I got into was this game called Corpse Party when I was a teen(if you dont know it, it's fine. Ur probably better off. But in denial baby gay me was obsessed bcuz of the yuri) so yeh I'm fine with a little violence

Thank you tho! It's one thing to be liked for my art or fic, but to have my insight valued too means a lot! I can't promise if or when I'll check it out, cuz i dont wanna get anyone's hopes up, but I'm not gonna write it off. It does genuinely seem interesting.

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shubertblue · 1 month ago

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Squid Games fic I came up with…

Premise: No SquidGames! AU… Inho- Hardened and widowed police officer undercover at a sketchy auto manufacturing facility meets target- Gihun. Gihun, desperate to make money to save his mom’s life and maybe even keep his daughter around takes a job offer he can’t refuse in his position. But tragedy still hits and he’s forced to work. Inho befriends Gihun in attempt to get insider information.

STORY STRUCTURE:

1. Exposition- Introduce Characters/Establish Setting/Foreshadow Conflict

-Inho gets assigned undercover @ sketchy manufacturing facility.

-Gihun target “in” (he’s innocent and Inho doesn’t realize just how gullible he is… well he will eventually.)

-Angsty Inho monologue, meets Gihun, etc

-Gihun desperate to get money to save mom and potentially keep daughter around signed a vaguely legal contract.

Gihun ends up loosing them anyways, but forced to work still… :(

- They don’t talk a lot right off the bat, Inho staring WAY too much, observing Gihun like a predator to prey.

- Gihun rightfully confused- refer to Inho knowing his name without asking and using the name young-il .

1. Inciting Incident 1 - Conflict that puts plot into motion.

-Gihun the only one willing to show Inho the ropes, very patient w/ Inho (he’s a quick learner but had no experience prior.) —> (bonus: Inho thought he could work desk, but turns out that is an exclusive position, only for runners/dealers.)

-Inho impressed, Gihun’s kindness and/Or acting (obviously he’s just nice, but Inho doesn’t know that yet. To add Gihun actually is good at the job, obviously working the trade for real. Not just a strawman.

-Planning to infiltrate, Inho tries to befriend Gihun through events.

-ex) Work convo/ being helpful/ drinks after work/ smoke breaks.

BONUS: Gihun sometimes clever. Inho tells him he’ll have to pay for drinks, Gihun comments that he’s better off and Inho refutes. Gihun points out name brand clothing and well-kept appearance etc- borderline flirting unknowingly.

-Gihun is friendly, but quickly grows weary- Like, he can tell Inho is being a little pushy. He roles with it though, he craves connection.

1. Rising Action - Build tension while characters bond.

-Inho feels like Gihun is catching onto him, so he gets a little bolder.

- He investigates harder, more personally. (Finds a way to get invited/infiltrate gihun’s house

- To avoid getting caught he makes advances on Gihun.

- Not entirely accepted at first, confused and questioning (on both ends really, borderline genuine and half desperate)

- Things get a little awkward/distant, so Inho switches gears to investigate the place itself.

1. Small Victory- Temporary solution/victory before things get worse/resolve

- Inho finds a lead/evidence! But he needs more and that gets riskier…

- Gihun confronts their “incident” and realizes it’s not entirely unwelcome, but still too forward.

- Gihun sees Inho Snooping/ Curious about evidence.

- Inho interrogates Gihun roughly/secretly.

- Figures out Gihun is genuine. A good guy unknowingly working for horrible people.

- Gihun agrees to help Inho get info/bring down the place even at the expense of his livelihood (again) ((probably would joke about it not being his 1st time inciting a rebellion at an his job.))

- This moves Inho deeply.

- Maybe with tension, some romance… (possible spice?)

1. Climax- Height of craziness, catharsis

- They plan more solidly.

- Gihun gets keys under the gullible guise of needing supplies/equiptment.

- Trades off to Inho secretly and distracts people in charge/monitoring.

- Inho is able to get in and get info/takes pictures and sends just in case. Calls for reinforcements.

- Tense moment as he hides in room as someone walks in, stays hidden.

- Inho gets back to work but boss is suspicious of him/confronts him

- Police come and all chaos.

- Badass Inho moments

- Inho about to get shot and Gihun blocks it. Inho still gets hurt but less impact saves him. (what can I say, I love a little dramatic moment even if cliche)

1. Falling Action- affects/aftermath of climax

- Gihun wakes up in hospital besides Inho’s own bed.

- They both survived! Yay! :D

- Still, they went through something traumatic-deals with emotions/pain.

- Inho grateful for Gihun’s sacrifice and care.

- Sappy bonding moment and development in relationship.

- Suddenly interrupted by Junho- Appreciative of Gihun for saving brother’s life.

- Sweet moment then interrupted by Jungbae (salty Inho —> shocked/amused Junho)

- Inho offers Gihun to stay with him as a “thanks” until he finds a new job.

- (Possible quick spice after tension/surviving before time skip.)

1. Resolution- the end! :)

-Two years after the hospital.

-Gihun never ends up moving out, because they end up together!

- Their relationship isn’t perfect, but they’re exactly what each other needs/balance each other out nicely.

- Gihun helps Inho loosen up/restores faith in humanity/ Joy.

- Inho gives Gihun the push to get his life in order.

- Gihun ends up getting an automotive service management position. (Makes good money.) At a good place this time.

- Fluff of their life together/ maybe even appreciating each other’s scars—> symbolic of having similar traumas and loving each other regardless.

- Possible sweet spice/ more romantic.

BONUS:

-They end up visiting Gihun’s daughter in the US

- Gihun first meets his ex respectfully, she’s impressed by his growth and they are civil.

- Gihun notices her husband was spying on them, she feels a little bad for being mistrusting but Gihun is very accepting about it.

- Inho (secretly spying on Gihun) ends up coming over to ease the tension.

- Plays it off with a clever excuse (as to why he was there) and Gihun of course believes him.

- Inho meets Gihun’s ex, cordial and cold. (A little possessive/flaunty in a very subtle way.)

- Gihun is able to meet his daughter with Inho.

- She notices that they have matching rings.

- Turns out, they’re engaged! :D

Bonus/Bonus

-Their vacation in the US!

-Romantic Dates and vacation activities ensure!

-tooth rotting fluff and sweet romantic tenderness.

-Possible “spice” fun, more flavorful…

(Might write it, but would definitely need a beta reader to keep me on track! I’m talking 10k+ slowburn….

#squid game #seong gi hun #gihun x inho #gihun x frontman #457 #fanfic #hwang inho #inhun #giho

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its-time-to-write · 2 years ago

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Hi y’all! This is my last unprompted angsty fic for a little! Gonna go back to our usually scheduled hijinks that are sitting in my request pile, I wanted to do this one first. I write all these as a way to deal with things that happen in my own life, whether it’s stressing about school and work, stupid romance, great romance, family, health, whatever, and I wanted to say (yet again) thank you for all the support. Sometimes I still can’t believe that you all like what I write but hey, there ya go

It’s funny, because my most popular fics are the ones that have been written directly out of my actual life. The ones that start out hard-to-deal-with, or with real, palpable heartbreak. The endings are often different because real life isn’t guaranteed a happy ending, but I’m allowed to take the past and see what it would be like if things went differently.

My characterization of Jamie is based on the only person I’ve ever really loved, which is why I can write his voice so clearly. I first watched Ted Lasso and was surprised at how similar they were, stupid hair and all. A lot of these fics are my way of archiving our story and immortalizing parts of it, as well as reminding myself that the love was there. It didn’t last and it wasn’t supposed to, but it was there.

Now, what’s real and what’s fiction? I’ll leave that up to you to decide, but I will say that it’s more than you might think and less than you might hope for.

So if you read this current fic and think, “huh, that was a really specific premise,” well I got news for you! It is. I’m in the first part of my journey on this, the early stages, and this story is not the way I want things to go for me. But I’m hoping that by creating a good ending out of a rough beginning, I can better face whatever lies ahead for me whether I approach it on my own two feet or with the assistance of some really sick wheels.

Anyway, enjoy this or skip it, it won’t hurt my feelings!

how to love being alive

Jamie’s at training when he gets the call. He barely registers the words on the other side when he’s cursing something awful, enough to make Roy Kent blush, and saying something about an emergency before speeding out the door. He pauses for a moment to look up an address in his phone, then he’s tearing out of the parking lot in a manner that puts Colin to shame.

To summarize, he’s not acting like himself.

He pulls up to a chiropractor of all places and the girl at the front desk must be able to tell who he’s here for because she just points to a door down the hall. Jamie’s pretty sure he’s never moved this quick in his life and wonders if this could translate to the pitch. Sure he’s fast, but he could always be faster.

He bursts through the door to see you borderline catatonic, staring at the floor while a doctor pats your arm. She looks at Jamie and says, “Let’s chat for a minute outside,” before he has a chance to say a single thing. Jamie can’t tear his eyes away from you as the doctor leads him out and shuts the door.

“Thought emergency contacts were for like, hospitals and shit,” he says.

The chiropractor shakes her head. Jamie notes that her name tag says “Dr. Hadley,” and has a vague memory of you mentioning her a few months ago.

God, it feels like a lifetime ago.

“We’re not confident she’s in a fit state to get herself home,” Dr. Hadley says. “Her headspace is a little messed up, which is to be expected. Usually people come to these types of appointments with some moral support.”

Jamie asks, “What kinds of appointments?” and Dr. Hadley tilts her head at him.

“You are Mr. Tartt, aren’t you?” she asks and Jamie just scoffs because he can’t decide between responding obviously, or telling her no, he’s not Mr. Tartt, that’s his father. He’s just Jamie.

Dr. Hadley knows who he is because she doesn’t live in a hole in the ground, so she doesn’t ask for identification. She takes his scoff as permission to keep talking, so she says, “She’s here for her MRI results. We’ve been in the process of treating a protrusion on her spine.”

Jamie is positive everyone in this office must think he’s on drugs because Dr. Hadley is talking like he’s supposed to know this, but for the life of him he knows you’d never said a thing.

“Your girlfriend has been in a severe amount of pain over the last few months, and we’ve finally been able to see the extent of the problem. Apparently she thought it would just go away, but it never did. So now she’s here with us.”

“She’s not my girlfriend,” Jamie says automatically. Because it’s true, innit? You’re not. You’ve been broken up for a month because he couldn’t take it anymore, couldn’t take the irritation at attending his matches and the tossing and turning in bed at night and the fact that you were wound so tight that you’d snap at the most minor offenses.

You hadn’t been surprised when Jamie said he couldn’t do it anymore, it’s over, and at the time he had wished that you’d shown just a tiny sliver of emotion. After all, a year and two months is a long time to be with someone for you to coldly slide him his key and then turn away as though he were a stranger.

He could have sworn there was a glimmer of tears in your eyes, but they’d looked that way for a bit now so maybe it was just allergies. There’s no reason for you to have been in the verge of tears for the entire month before the breakup, right?

Right.

But he can’t think about that now because Dr. Hadley is frowning at him in a way that so comically reminds him of Roy’s sister that he has to bite back a laugh.

Everything’s all twisted.

“I certainly hope your split was amicable,” Dr. Hadley says. “You’re the only one listed as her emergency contact. She needs someone to get her home safely.”

“Right,” says Jamie. “Yes. Fuck. Right. Um, what exactly is wrong with her?”

Dr. Hadley shakes her head. “That’s her personal information to share with you at her prerogative. And we should probably go see her, I’m sure she doesn’t want to be alone for long.”

Jamie snorts at that. This doctor doesn’t know you at all. If you’ve received any type of bad news the last thing you want is people hanging around.

Jamie used to pride himself on being the only one you’d let into the bad-new bubble.

You don’t count with those other people, you’d said once while wrapped around Jamie so tight he thought he’d have to call Ted to bring a crowbar. You said, I don’t have to pretend around you. I don’t ever get tired of you.

Jamie bitterly thinks that that statement turned out to be a lie, but he shakes it off because you’ve only been separated a month, and apparently he’s still your emergency contact for a doctor he didn’t know you had been seeing and fuck if you didn’t look like the most pitiful thing he’d ever seen. He’ll pretend it’s ok for as long as it takes to get you home and comfortable, and then he’s calling this office to get his number switched off.

So he follows Dr. Hadley back into the room as she softly says your name in order to break whatever trance has you studying the carpet like your final exam is in ten minutes.

You can barely look at her as she whispers something about going home and being gentle, to which you nod and finally look at Jamie.

He wonders if you recognize him, because the stare you have is so vacant that you might as well be looking at a stranger.

“Is she on drugs?” he asks because it looks like you’re on drugs.

Dr. Hadley shakes her head and holds out her arm to help you up. “No, she’s just in a lot of pain. And emotional distress. It’s a killer combo, and she’ll need extra gentle handling for a while. No sitting for too long, no bending, no lifting. There’s a back support at the front desk for you to take.”

Jamie thinks he hears something pointed in the way Dr. Hadley says, extra gentle. What, like he doesn’t know how bad an injury can take you out? He’s in the Premier League for fuck’s sake. He knows how to deal with a strained muscle.

Dr. Hadley transfers your arm over to Jamie’s so smoothly that he barely understands what’s happening as she ushers you both out the door, thrusting a small foam roll into Jamie’s free hand.

“For lumbar support,” she says. “Won’t help much, but it’s better than nothing.”

Jamie’s pretty sure he’s said thanks as you climb in the car and then he’s in the drivers seat and it’s dead quiet.

“Right,” he says to the silence. “What the fuck.”

You’re picking at your nails something fierce. Jamie has to fight the urge to take your hand in his. A month of separation is not long enough for this shit.

“Can you just drive?” you ask in a broken voice. “I don’t want to be sitting for longer than I have to.”

There’s a new pitch in your voice, one Jamie’s never heard before, so he doesn’t argue. He doesn’t turn on the radio or a playlist or a podcast or anything, just drives in silence. He knows if it’s quiet long enough, you’ll talk.

He’s the opposite. He doesn’t need time to crack wide open, just a kind touch or a soft glance and he’s an open book. He was always shocked how early into your relationship you’d figured that out. A soft, “What’s on your mind, Jaim?” and he was unloading about whatever stress or fear he had.

He’s two minutes away from your flat when you break the silence. “I have gradual onset paralysis,” you say in a voice devoid of emotion. “‘Gradual onset’ means it happens over time. Paralysis means, well…paralysis.”

Jamie can hear what you’re saying and he understands it, but what catches him is the way you’re like nothing more than a hollow body. Not cracking a joke, not picking a fight. Just- empty.

Jamie says a long and drawn out “Fuuuckk,” because what else can you say? It’s not really his business to comfort you or to pry, except he’s the one the doctor called, so he allows himself one question.

“How did it happen?”

Last he knew, you were healthy as a horse.

“Two disks in my spine popped,” you reply, still in that same awful emotionless voice. “They’re not really sure how, could’ve been any number of things. Anyway, it got into my nerves. And my spinal cord. And it’s messing things up and it’s only going to get worse. The scans were to see if they could operate, because sometimes you can remove the shards. Or whatever it is. But I guess they can’t, because if they tried I’d definitely be paralyzed. So all I can do now is be in pain and wait for my legs to shut down.”

Jamie doesn’t know how to respond to any of that but he’s saved from thinking of an adequate response because he’s at your flat.

It was smart of you not to sell it when you’d moved in with Jamie. He wonders if you knew the breakup was inevitable.

He hops out and opens the door like a gentleman, offering his hand like he’s some Mr. Darcy-type shit, except you had both agreed that Roy was Mr. Darcy and he was Bingley. So it doesn’t fit at all except as soon as you’re done clutching his hand so you can get out without unnecessary pain, his hand flexes itself like he’s in that damn movie.

It wasn’t even a conscious choice, just a thing his hand decided to do, and he definitely thinks he’s going to have to talk to Ted about this. Or maybe Sam. Sam knows shit and is good at empathy. Maybe he’ll know what to say when your ex-girlfriend tells you she’s not going to walk ever again.

Jamie follows you to the door as you fiddle with the lock and push it open with a sigh. For a moment he doesn’t know if he should go inside, but it smells like honey and cinnamon because it’s the beginning of fall and he thinks that he should at least make sure you’ll be alright.

He notices you’re moving weird. All stiff, like. You’re trying to get an icepack out of the freezer but you can’t maneuver in a way that’s comfortable so Jamie grabs it and hands it to you.

You mumble, “Thanks,” and Jamie catches a glimpse of the perpetual glimmer in your eye.

“D’you need me to call someone?” he asks. “I can get Keeley down here. Or fucking… Ted. Or Colin.” He doesn’t say Sam, because he needs Sam. He can’t talk to Sam if he’s here with you.

You shake your head. Jamie wonders if it hurts to talk, but he remembers how much you hate the sound of your voice when you’re crying.

You take a slow, shallow breath to collect yourself. “I’m ok,” you finally say. “Not much anyone can do, and you’ve got training. I- I didn’t know they’d call you. I still have to switch your number with someone else. I’m probably going to ask Keeley since my family’s still far away.”

“Right,” Jamie says. Not much else to say. Except-

“You were seeing that bone doctor when we were together, and you didn’t fucking say anything?”

It’s accusatory and he knows it, but he can’t for the life of him say it kinder. Ted’s always on about communication and shit, and that is not communication.

You shuffle over to the couch and use it to help you lay face down in the floor. The icepack is precariously balanced on the small of your back.

“Didn’t know how to tell you,” comes your muffled voice. “Least, I figured out how to tell you too late. What was I gonna say, ‘Sorry I’ve been a complete bitch to you for four weeks, I’ve got shit floating around in my spine that makes me hurt so bad I want to die?’ Sounds fucking stupid.”

Jamie wants to say, Swear jar because it’s a long-standing joke, but he catches the words right before they reach the tip of his tongue.

“You could’ve said something,” he replies instead. “Chronic pain’s shit. It’s really shit and it makes you act like shit to the people you care about. It’s not an excuse, but it’s a reason.” As the words are coming out of his mouth, Jamie is reminded of a time when the roles were reversed, and you were giving him the “excuse versus reason,” speech.

You’d said, You’re dad’s an abusive prick, Jamie. Makes sense that you’d have a lot of negative emotions.

Fuck, if only you’d said something sooner. Maybe this would be something that you’d be cracking jokes about, or Jamie would be holding your hand, or he’d be laying right next to you as he runs his fingers through your hair.

But your muscles spasm so that thought gets banished as you bite on your forearm in an effort not to yell.

“Fucking hell,” Jamie says. “I don’t think you’re sorted on your own. I’m calling Ted.”

He walks to the other room so he can pretend he can’t hear your protests.

—

Ted leaves training to Roy, Beard, and Nate. What’s the point in having four coaches if one of ‘em can’t leave for family emergencies?

Sure, you’re not actually family, but that’s Ted for you. He doesn’t do casual friendships.

Jamie is out the door like a shot as soon as Ted knocks with a “Sorry, coach,” that Ted barely has a chance to wave off.

Ted doesn’t say much once he’s inside, just rambles on about training and Kansas and Henry. He’s clattering around in your kitchen and you can’t find it in yourself to care what he’s doing so you just keep laying on the floor, willing your back to stop hurting.

Finally, he comes over and sets down a smoothie in a short glass with a straw.

“It’s so you can drink it without moving,” he explains.

“I don’t think I can do this,” you say more to the couch legs than to Ted.

He sighs from where he’s crouched down next to you. “You don’t really have a choice, darlin’. You have to do this. The question is, are you gonna go through it alone?”

You shrug as best as you’re able.

“Wrong answer,” says Ted, standing up. “You’ve got a whole crew of people here who are gonna root for you and support you with whatever you need. All you got to do is ask, sweetheart.”

Ah, fuck, you’re crying again and Ted can definitely tell because your shoulders are shaking. He’s pretty sure you’d want to save face so he stands up and says, “Beard’s coming over after training. Says he wants to figure out how to modify your house for a wheelchair or something. Thought I’d make us all dinner so we’re not so hangry when he mentions taking an ax to anything.”

The mental image of Coach Beard chopping down your stairs is enough to make you smile a little through your tears.

—

Waiting is really shitty. Like, really shitty. Every day is the same thing: tingly legs, shooting pains, phantom cramps. The worst was when Dani and Richard were over and you stood up to get something from the fridge, and your legs decided at that moment to lose feeling. You panicked with your arms held out for balance as you swayed back and forth for a moment, willing your feet to fucking move. They did, but not before Dani and Richard were on you in a flash, ready to catch you if you fell.

“Well that was weird,” you joke in an effort to cut the tension. They laugh, but you still catch their worried glance.

“You do not have to put on a brave face for us,” Dani says. “If you want to joke, we will joke. But if you want to cry, we will cry too.”

“You can cry,” Richard says, “I will just pour more wine.”

You laugh. There’s been a steady stream of Greyhounds at your flat for the last week and a half. Everyone and their mother (quite literally) has come by to see you. Your own parents were coming in a week to stay indefinitely while you sorted things out.

You wonder if it’s easier to lose control of your legs slowly or all at once? On the one hand, you at least have notice. But on the other hand, the long, drawn-out waiting feels like slow torture. Every day you wake up from restless sleep and experimentally wiggle your toes. Every day, you check off one more box on your mental calendar as you count down to a date that doesn’t even properly exist.

The only person who hasn’t visited is Jamie. You don’t blame him, though. Keeley’s come round almost every single day and has been successfully switched to your emergency contact. She’s the one you’re calling as soon as you discover you can’t move.

You’re pretty sure it’s getting closer. Your legs fall asleep more frequently and things are all numb. It’s like you know you’re in pain, but it’s not quite registering with your nerves.

It fucking sucks.

—

You don’t believe in intuition like spirits and all that, but you believe in it in that your brain can pick up things that you couldn’t if you were actually trying.

That’s why you’re pretty sure this is it.

Walking is pretty much a no-go right now, so you stiff-leg yourself to the couch and sprawl out as comfortably as you can.

You call Keeley, and she’s over in no time.

“Hi babes,” she says as soon as she’s through the door, “Can I call Rebecca for girls’s night?”

“Sure,” you say, “Might as well live it up.”

Keeley replies, “Great! She’ll be here in ten minutes,” and you laugh, really actually laugh, because of course Keeley’s already called her.

Rebecca swoops in all smiles and no sympathy which is great because if one more person pushes their lower lip out at you, you’re going to scream. She’s brought drinks and Keeley’s pulling out snacks and you’re going to talk and giggle until you fall asleep, ready for what the morning has.

“Is Shandy making a move on that one player?” Rebecca asks Keeley from the couch.

“Nah,” Keeley calls back, “He said he wasn’t interested right now. Still hung up, I think.”

“What player?” you ask. You know what Shandy’s like, and you feel for the poor guy.

Rebecca and Keeley are silent before Keeley says, “You wouldn’t know him.”

“Bullshit,” you reply. “I know everyone on that team and I know you haven’t signed anyone new recently. Is it Colin?”

Rebecca shakes her head and gives Keeley a look. Keeley shrugs. “You’re the one who brought it up, babes.”

Rebecca turns to you. “It’s Jamie,” she says. “She’s been trying to bag him ever since Zava showed up.”

You shake your head. “She’s not right for him. He deserves someone better than that.”

Keeley’s back from the kitchen and scrutinizing your expression. “And what exactly do you mean by better?” she asks.

You laugh. “Oh no, not me. I wasn’t talking about me. No, I’m not- he needs someone different. Like, I don’t know, Roy’s sister, maybe? She’s great and a doctor to boot. Very caring too.”

“You’re caring,” Keeley says slowly, “And anyway, Molly doesn’t like him like that. They’re just friends.”

“Hang on, are you putting yourself in the same bracket as Shandy?” Rebecca interjects.

You shrug. “I was a complete bitch the last month we were together. There’s no excuse for it. I’m just surprised he lasted as long as he did.”

“You were in fucking pain!” Keeley exclaims. “You said you weren’t sleeping and everything fucking hurt and you couldn’t even think straight.”

You grab a handful of candy from a bowl. “Keels, I appreciate the sentiment, but I majorly fucked it. Like, there’s no going back. So he can date whoever he wants as long as it’s not fucking Shandy. Can we please, please move on?”

Rebecca’s eyes are narrowed but they both acquiesce. “Keeley, what about your love life? I’m sure it’s boring as usual.”

Keeley shrieks and smacks her with a pillow. “Fuck off,” she replies. “I’ll have you know it’s going very well…”

—

You were right. You wake up still on the couch tangled in Keeley’s arms, and the standard toe-wiggle just… doesn’t happen. It’s quiet, the early morning type, the kind where the sunlight isn’t so harsh and birds are chirping softly and all of Richmond hasn’t quite got up to begin their day.

As you look at your unmoving toes, the first thing you feel is a rush of relief. The waiting’s over, you think.

You look over to the wheelchair that’s been leaning patiently against the wall all this time. Here’s the first day of forever. You’re in no rush for it to start, so you let Keeley’s little snores and Rebecca’s heavy breathing lull you back to sleep.

—

It’s definitely a learning curve. And it’s frustrating. And if one more person catches you crying out of sheer rage, you’re going to start throwing things. But like Ted said, you don’t really have a choice.

Your mom said, “The only way out is through,” then grinned at the murderous glare you shot her way. She opened her phone and pulled up a picture of you, age three. “Same lovely expression as always,” she remarks cheerfully. That cracks your frown. You always were a funny kid.

It takes a while to figure out how to get places. Keeley (the absolute angel) volunteered, but she’s busy with the PR firm and quite frankly, a little too delicate to help you into a car. You made the mistake of saying this exactly one time and because subject to a rant about how she’s “not weak, just PETITE FOR FUCK’S SAKE!!”

Roy had punctuated her argument with a couple “That’s fucking right, babe"s all while rolling his eyes behind her back. It made you giggle.

The general consensus was that at any given reasonable hour (or unreasonable if you’re Richard or Bumbercatch) a Greyhound or coach would be able to get you where you’re needed. And today, that place is Nelson Road.

“How often does Jamie come visit?” Jan Maas asks, straightforward as ever.

“Um, never,” you reply. “We broke up, remember?”

“Right,” agrees Jan Maas. “We all know that, I just assumed you had gotten back together.”

You laugh. How absurd. “And why on earth would you assume that?”

“Because he talks about you all the time,” comes his prompt reply.

Huh. That’s interesting. You haven’t received so much as a single emoji from Jamie, but hadn’t thought a thing of it. But this, this is strange. This does not fit into your idea of how broken up people act.

“Weird,” you say. “Wonder what the fuck that’s about.”

Jan Maas shrugs and moves to lift you from the car.

—

It’s weird to be at Nelson Road, number one because it’s been FOREVER, number two because you’re eye-level with all sorts of things you’d never noticed before (ahem, part of the wall Roy kicked that no one cared to patch up), and number three because the last time you were here, it was as Jamie Tartt’s girlfriend.

Jan holds open the door as you roll in, ready to face whatever lies in wait.

It turns out whatever is a very excited Ted and Beard as well as a neutral Roy who present you a coaching jacket and a whistle.

“You’re coaching with us today because that little rat bastard Nate went to the dark side,” Beard says.

You remark, “Tell us how you really feel,” earning a snort from Roy and a chuckle from Trent Crimm.

“Oh yeah,” Ted says, “this is Trent. He’s writing a book.”

“Cool,” you say, “but you do know I know jack shit about coaching?”

Beard shrugs. “Neither do we. Worked out pretty well so far.” That earns another snort from Roy.

“Right,” you say. “Well, I guess I’m up for anything.”

“You mean ‘down,’” says Ted. “Oh I’m sorry, is it too soon?”

“Never,” you reply. “It’s never too soon to make trauma-related puns and this world, it’s either laugh or cry. So fuck it, I’m going to laugh.”

“Fuck yes,” grunts Roy before turning on his heel to yell at the team to GET THE FUCK ON THE PITCH YOU LITTLE PRICKS!

—

You don’t do much except sit there and watch as the coaches yell and point and run drills. It’s a chore to remind yourself not to check out Jamie’s butt as he runs by so you start thinking not yours, not yours, like a mental mantra.

He’s not looking at you so you won’t look at him and you’re sure it won’t be a problem because there are so many people to look at and talk to, except lunch rolls around (haha) and you sit at the head of a table and Jamie’s on the bench right next to you. So. There goes the no eye-contact plan.

You take exactly two bites of your sandwich before thinking fuck this and pushing yourself back so you can roll away. You can just take the elevator to see Becca.

You’ve made it a good way down the hall when you hear Jamie calling your name while saying, “Wait,” so you move a little faster.

But it’s still new and you’re painfully reminded that arms are not legs so he catches you with ease.

“The fuck are you running away for?” he asks, and you want to point out that technically, you weren’t running. Metaphorically though, he’d be right.

“I’m not running,” you reply. “I was just going to see Rebecca.”

“Bullshit,” he says. “I know you, and that was running. Is it because of me?”

“No,” you say, and you realize how much you’ve been looking up today. Your fucking neck needs a break so you rub it and look straight ahead, past Jamie at a life-size decal of O’Brien on the opposite wall.

“Why would I be running away from you? You’re not- I’m the shitty ex in this situation. I’m the one who fucked things up, Jamie, so… you don’t have to like, pretend that it’s your problem. I actually think it would be better if you were just mad and avoided me instead of whatever the hell is currently happening.”

Jamie rubs his jaw. He should be exasperated, he should, but instead the gears in his mind are turning. A few words stick out to him and then it’s like the final puzzle piece has clicked into place.

“Hang on,” he says slowly. “Hold the fuck up. Did you mess things up on purpose?”

The moment the words are out of his mouth he wants to take them back and apologize, because there’s no way they’re actually true, except you have a look on your face that can only be described as guilty.

“Fuuckkk,” Jamie breathes out and you hurriedly interject, “It wasn’t intentional! At least, not at first. It started because I was irritable because I hurt a lot, and then I convinced myself that I was faking it so I got mad at myself for being a little liar. And then I couldn’t sleep because I hurt so bad and everything was making me uncomfortable so I started snapping at you. I noticed it pretty quick so I figured I’d get the pain checked out and sorted because I didn’t think pulled muscles were supposed to last this long. And it turned out that it wasn’t a pulled muscle but some of my disks were all weird, and then one day in between physical therapy and the chiropractor, I fell on my back and jostled everything wrong and it fucking popped.”

Jamie thinks he knows exactly when that was. He remembers you saying something about falling while walking to your car after work and him asking if you needed ice. It was at the tail end of things, and he’d taken your stiffness figuratively as opposed to literally. Like, you were acting all cold because you hated him, not because you couldn’t move.

“So,” you continue, “I just leaned into it. I mean, Dr. Hadley was only one of my doctors, but she’s the one who told me I- you know, could end up like this. She said if things popped and it got into my spinal cord or fluid or whatever and they couldn’t get it out, it was only a matter of time before it messed everything up. They only way to stop it at that point would be to not move so either way, I end up stuck.”

You half-sob, half-laugh. “I didn’t know how to tell you and I could tell you were already annoyed with me so I just decided to let it happen. You’re better off without me, anyway. I hate asking for help and I hate when people give me empathetic looks or what-fucking-ever, and I was going to have to ask you for a lot of help. You don’t even fucking have time for that, Jamie.”

Jamie is at a loss for words, and you’ve run out of things to say.

You stare at each other in the hallway by the elevator, breathing heavily. You’ve both triggered each other’s fight-or-flight response, and it seems you’re both down for a fight.

“Right,” Jamie says finally, “ok, yeah, ok. You didn’t tell me because you didn’t want me to have to deal with this?”

You nod.

“Right,” he says again. “That’s fucked up.”

You don’t respond and he looks at you closely. “You know that’s fucked up, yeah?”

You shrug.

“Jesus, babe.” Jamie runs his hands through his hair. He’s going to have to fix his headbands. “Alright,” he says yet again, “look. Dr. Sharon and me- we talk. And, you’re supposed to be able to talk to people about shit like this. Like, me playing football isn’t supposed to mean I don’t have time for the people I love. And if you’re feeling that way or if you’re hurting, you have to tell me so I don’t think you’re being all pissed off because you hate me. That’s the whole point of love, babe. You take care of each other’s shit.”

“Jamie, I can’t get places easily anymore. I can’t drive and I can’t go up steps. I will never be able to storm the pitch to kiss you or walk with you in Brazil. I get mad really easily because everything’s so fucking frustrating and I just want to punch something.” You shake your head. “You don’t deserve any of that. You need someone who can be there for you and isn’t a total pill to be around.”

“Are you fucking trying to push me away?” he asks.

“Yes!” you exclaim. “Obviously!”

“Well fucking don’t. You almost had me the first time, but good luck getting rid of me now.”

“Fine!”

“For fuck’s sake, just kiss,” groans Will, walking by with an armful of laundry.

“Fuck off, William!” you both say in unison and then Jamie’s on one knee, eye-level with you and brushing a thumb across your chin.

“Fucking hell, love,” he breathes. “You have to remember that you can talk to me, yeah? Just promise you’ll remember.”

You nod, unable to speak.

“Good,” he says. “We’re giving this another go. And if you can’t kiss me on the pitch, might as well do it here, yeah?”

#jamie tartt x reader #jamie tartt fanfiction #jamie tartt imagine #jamie tartt x y/n #jamie tartt x you #jamie tartt #ted lasso

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raayllum · 5 months ago

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I read say the wind won't change on us at least once a week if I don't I will wither away and die what the HELL have you and burrs done to me

Aww thank you so much! that fic was one @thosefiveadoraburrs and i had a lot of fun writing in spite of the angsty subject matter! also weirdly enough felt like Growth in a lot of ways since one of our first rayllum oneshots 4+ years ago was a "Rayla is sick" fic and this like a much more in-depth follow up, at least in terms of premise?

Getting to weave in other characters (namely Ezran, Nyx, and Ethari) as Rayllum navigates the situation and all the big feelings that come with it was a treat, too, since it's rare to write the latter two overall

Did not, of course, expect any of it let alone 2+ things to have a weird amount of parallels to S5 and S6 though, but very pleased all the same!

“Thank you,” Callum said. “But I haven’t found anything yet. We’d probably have to turn right around and leave the sea entirely—” “Leave the sea?” Ezran repeated more doubtfully. They were more than halfway toward the centre, and that’d taken almost a week. They wouldn’t make it back in time if they turned around now, and they only had one ship. Nyx raised her hand. “Uh, do you really have time for that kind of detour? Don’t you guys have like, the end of the world to stop?” Callum ground his teeth together. “I don’t care about—Rayla might not have two weeks.”

She mock-gasped. “Oh no, whatever shall we do? If only we had a mage who could fly places—” Callum chuckled and shook his head at her, leaning in closer. His free hand rested on the railing by her hip. Did this count as flirting, she thought, slightly light-headed? “Y’know, I think I might know a guy.” “Oh we couldn’t get him,” she puttered. “Too busy and in-demand.” “I dunno, I’m pretty good at drawing on connections.” She arched an eyebrow. “Are you now?” “Well yeah.” His big goofy grin softened, his fingers entwining themselves with hers. “Word is there’s this elf girl he’s got a big soft spot for—would do anything for her.”

and it was either very early in the morning or very late at night when the door to the sleeping quarters burst open. She forced her eyes open, ears pricking between laboured breaths, and then nearly let out a sob in relief. “Callum.” [...] “You’re here,” Rayla rasped.

#fic: say the winds won't change on us #thosefiveadoraburrs #rayllum #thanks for asking #fic #my fic #anonymous #kind words

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anothanobody · 2 days ago

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His To Marry, His to Protect

Pairing: Sung Jinwoo & Cha Haein

Premise: A sheltered princess is made to wed the newly crowned king, Sung Jinwoo, as an assurance after the war ended. A decision that not everyone respects in his kingdom as many plots and twists cannot wait to see her out of the palace to replace her with a Queen of their choosing.

The premise is up there, now... it is going to be angsty every now and then, like really.

A few key points for the beginning part of the plot:

The wedding will be kind of sabotaged, the wedding is the first time they meet, they're actually attracted to each other based on looks. They kiss at the ceremony, it lingers on their minds.

the reception makes her feel unwelcomed quickly, the nobles keep taking Jinwoo away, interrupting her and cutting her off every time they're talking. Though, he rejects them a few times, the few times he goes, the ladies are the ones getting close to him or they talk to him without ever directing a words at her that wasn’t passive aggressive.

First dance, only dance, he’s whisked away to dance with Juhee and then Jinah. Whispers and murmurs after he’s dragged for another dance with a lady, Haein feels embarrassed, after a few she leaves for the garden to breathe and then to the palace after returning to the ballroom to see him still dancing with her.

She tells the maids to not let anyone inside the room for the night. They follow her orders and inform the king, jinwoo, since he had arranged for them to share a bed already. He’s locked out and his new wife is mad.

Her people after their king was informed, leave the ballroom, rendering their alliance strained already.

After another similar incident and rumors spreading of Jinwoo’s dalliances with another lady at his wedding, they ask for an annulment after the humiliation of the wedding of their princess as her and her people were disrespected.

Jinwoo embarrassed at his people, had half of the palace fired and goes look for Haein. She allowed the annulment, but Jinwoo begs her to at least stay with him till their required period of six months ended to show her that things will change.

She accepts but she’s sure the divorce will go through anyway, his nobles were shameless in their actions, they were going to do worse.

Haein has her walls up, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Jinwoo is being extra careful with her, he had actually met her before, or seen her, when their kingdoms were at peace when they were just children before the war.

Things keep happening out of her control. Though, she starts to fall in love him, things were not great. Going against his own nobility for her sake, they are ready to rebel and take over. Haein thinks it will be better to go their separate ways but Jinwoo after spending time together, cannot let her go.

Ok… so listen. like i said i love angst.

now the wedding was his fault, he was unsure what to do at the occasion and with so many people present of foreign countries, he had tried to stay by her side. He wasn’t sure whether to lose it in front of everyone or consent it. Alas, he chose wrong. He regrets it.

Haein feels alone as her own delegation has to go back. Leaving her there. She had been though it; so she’s sure she’ll survive it. For a while she feels like it’s her against the world, she doesn’t trust Jinwoo.

She can see he’s making an effort. Her walls start to crumble for him and Jinah that has been by her side since the first day, knowing what it is like to be a princess and having no agency for most of their lives.

There might be a runaway arc or a caged arc, where she’ll be locked up in the palace without a way out in fear of her running away. and another war might break out.

so. it gets dark real fast 💀

this will happen to a certain extent in the first maybe three chapters. or four. if you have opinions let me know, i’m having lots of thoughts on whether i should make it a lighter or darker story, honestly tho, solo leveling ain’t sunshine’s and rainbows so…

This is roughly what will happen in HTMHTP, hopefully you’ll like it when it comes out! it’s in the works!

#jinhae

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lunar-years · 1 month ago

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if you want to we would love to hear about your current rkj thoughts!

I was hoping to get some writing done this weekend but then I got sick with the worst cold so :( nothing has gotten done. But!!! I am thinking lotsss of thoughts about them ❤️. Many of which are kind of depressing and related to my angsty fic wips lmao but here you go:

in a scenario where Jamie and his dad reunite and are on somewhat on good terms moving forward, I think Roy and Keeley both try the absolute MOST to be fully supportive and even let James Sr. come visit and stay at their place and whatnot BUT they also still hate that man with every fiber of their beings. So to cope with the constant irritation of James Sr.'s presence, they occasionally hide away with one another and go back and forth exchanging increasingly ridiculous ways they could get rid of James Sr. and "no one would have to know." by the end of any given visit they've got a fully conceived and well developed plot for his demise. They do this so to keep themselves sane so that when they emerge from the room they can be totally civil and support Jamie how he needs them to, and it's kind of this important thing they have just the two of them (they don't ever tell Jamie because they know it would upset/worry him, and it becomes pretty much the only longstanding secret they have without him)

(TW: Suicide ideation)...my career retirement fic is getting very dark I fear because I am leaning into Brett's quotes about Roy possibly being suicidal. So chapter two is going to be the darkest chapter diving into Roy's headspace after retiring, but chapter 3 (which is actually Jamie's retirement chapter) is going to carry over a lot of the same themes, because Roy knows how similar Jamie is to him in a lot of ways and is secretly petrified that Jamie is going to contemplate suicide like he did when he was forced to give up football (Jamie however is not suicidal in this story, he has some other stuff going on). except neither Jamie nor Keeley are aware of Roy's prior near-attempt years before (because he's never told them. oh.) and so Roy is just watching Jamie all the time like a hawk and being totally overbearing and it's driving Jamie Nuts. Any then there's a lot of revelations and important conversations and love <3. This is the story I'm working on most right now and I'm really hoping to get the second chapter out soon but yeah that's the premise!!

#royjamiekeeley #ted lasso #fic: rjk career change #ship post #asks

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chainofclovers · 2 months ago

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Fic ask meme: I want to know all of them, but am intensely curious about 3, 4, 16, 18, 19 ✨🫡

Howdy! Thanks for the ask, friend! :D

3. What was your happiest writing experience?

It was finishing up "stay open" (Ted/Rebecca/Nate) right at the start of the year for my Sexy Christmas due date of January 4. I had been working on the fic off and on since June 2023. It was a gift for @boglady and I'd been, annoyingly, telling her I was writing something for her while (SUCCESSFULLY) keeping the relationship and premise a secret. I was beside myself with excitement for not having to keep the secret anymore. My darling beta @itsagutthing was keeping me sane, but not sane enough that I didn't blast the Bach violin chaconne Nate records for Ted in the fic while I was going through the Taco Bell drive-thru in real life. My wife was out of town. I kept odd hours. Despite the six+ month lead time, I added thousands of words to the fic in the final couple days. IT WAS THE BEST! I genuinely was having the time of my life writing that thing and it's easily the fic I'm most proud of writing at any point in my life and one of the most fun times I've had participating in a fandom event.

4. What was your most frustrating writing experience?

Keeping with fic, I ended up pretty happy with the angsty post-canon sort-of-ish-Ted/Beard/Rebecca fic, "rice," that I wrote for a comment-a-thon prize. But I had a lot of stops and starts including a lot of difficulty with a whole different plot idea that ended up being bad. It turns out that setting out to specifically write angst (or, I imagine, any specific tone) feels like a lot of pressure! I spent far less time writing the actual fic that ended up existing than I spent gnashing my teeth while writing doomed words.

16. What do you want to change about your writing in 2025? What do you want to stay the same?

Already answered!

18. Say something kind about your own writing this year.

I had fun and did what I wanted! I did things like spend 7 months thinking about a Ted/Rebecca/Nate poly arrangement that likely wouldn't be up a lot of people's alley, or write a modern art museum AU in one quick evening. Life is stressful and hard and writing should be a blast whenever possible.

19. If you’re an epigraph person, which was your most meaningful epigraph?

Probably the epigraph for my Secret Santa fic, "and you're with me" (Ted/Rebecca). Ever since I heard "Jade Green" by Kacey Musgraves I had T/R thoughts. It's such a beautiful song, and I ended up having a jade bracelet pop up a few times in the story as a focal point for Rebecca as her relationship with Ted evolves and grows over the years.

I can't help it, I get anxious, and every time we part I say a little prayer to drive away the dark And I'm with you and you're with me Like the bracelet that you gave me

Year-end fic ask meme.

#2024 fic ask meme #broadwayfreak5357 #asks #meme #hot dork club

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ashoss · 8 months ago

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I LOVE Hermes kid Dick Grayson, I love Dionysus kid Steph, and I'm torn bc both Athena kid Barbara and Jason make so much sense but it's not fun if we repeat :(

I think the obvious choice for Jason is Ares, but that makes me very sad. Also, given Cass's origin story it makes sense for her father to be Ares–except taking the place of Shiva. Mythologically the gods could turn into animals but unlike the Norse gods I don't think any of them ever was a mother. Except for Zeus, arguably (see: the births of Athena and Dionysus). I just see Ares being attracted to David Cain's…*gestures vaguely* everything. And Cass fighting the heritage of violence she was born to, but I see the same with Jason.

Also to the Zeus kid Dick anon: not to worry fam, I gotchu: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1825744

This series by emavee is mostly Dick & Bruce and has a lot of variations of magical!Dick hiding his identity/abilities from Bruce.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/37798489

That one is werewolf!Dick Grayson but it's the same premise.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/53461267#main

Here's an angsty case fic with regular Robin Dick Grayson and soft dad Bruce.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/45895753

And lastly here's an incredibly soft fic with actual baby bat Dick and more soft Dad Bruce.

Back to PJO Batfam kids: maybe Cass becomes a huntress of Artemis? IDK. Also I see Alfred being a follower if not a son of Hestia. She's another virgin goddess but most top goddesses are for sexist reasons, I say let them fuck nasty.

i do really like Athena kid Babs and Jason!! but i think i might make her a clearsighted mortal and Jason I'm still torn on,, but yeah i kind of want to make them all children of different gods but maybe ill have an exception or two :)

i do like ares kid jason but i feel like that might play into his angry angsty thing too much? its kind of a copout if that makes sense. ares kid cass does make sense but im not 100% sure on it. (and on that mother thing, apollo kid kayla actually has a mortal dad - meaning apollo probably birthed kayla so!!)

hunter of artemis cass is def interesting and i might play around with that? also alfred is 100% a hestia devotee at the least ( or maybe hestia herself? who knows?)

#barbara gordon #jason todd #cass cain #alfred pennyworth #ashbox #the bat pjo au #also #fic recs

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m--rtyr · 11 months ago

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can i ask for a quick rundown of your mcd and/or mystreet rewrite? i’m a new follower and a tiny bit lost 😭

Ah, Ofc!! this will be a long post, because you said 'quick' and i just heard 'explain everything'. just because I don't know HOW to summarise everything, so I just explain what I can... which is too much.

each section will have a TL;DR if it's long, though.

So, the only rewrite I’ve actually, like, done so far is Amaranth (https://archiveofourown.org/works/31310384)

It’s an MCD rewrite, the first one I did, and it’s not **technically** related to my overall rewrite universe, though I’m not going to totally discredit it. It’s where I got a lot of my ideas, and it was sort of a first draft for me. It’s very similar to MCD, just with events changed to how I would have written them myself. Major change is that the Zane/aphmau engagement actually goes somewhere. My favourite change was the Pikoro arc tho for some reason bc it was just my first significant deviation from the original plot.

Now… cannibalism and cult stuff, yeah?

(Don’t read past this point if you are uncomfortable with discussions of human-on-human meat/organ consumption)

Lycoris Radiata (https://archiveofourown.org/works/50710504) is the only part of this current era of rewrite!Aphverse that has any content so far.

TL;DR for this section: i mostly just emphasised themes present in canon, there's cannibalism for magical reasons, Shad is more relevant early on, and there's a reason why characters look like that when i draw them, i promise. Also, cult stuff!

LR is an MCD rewrite, which has some lore changes. It begins with Avra (Aphmau) travelling with Visher, Garroth being angsty, and so on. Only the prologue and first chapter are currently posted, and you don't need to read Amaranth to begin it (though it will follow similar storylines later on). Basically, the main premise is that it’s kind of a criticism of imperialism, organised religion, and so on. Those are themes already present in original MCD, and so I… expanded. Blood Magic is the main magic focused on as well. It's the kind that Avra uses, and it's the kind that makes SKs function. Avra has to consume blood and meat (typically organ meat, preferably human) in order to have any amount of magic, and depending on what creature the meat comes from, also grants her some fun little magical extras. She also has a strong association with Judgement(Shad) in my rewrite, and there is a reason I draw them so often together. Most character changes you'll see have some lore-based backing for it. Characters who are made darker-skinned, or have had their haircolour changed, it's typically due to them belonging to a particular ethnic group that i made for Ru'Aun or Tu'La, which does impact their characters in the way that they obviously grew up under certain cultures. Sometimes it'll just be because I think it looks cool, or for visual/thematic parallels with another character. If you're ever curious as to knowing why i have certain characters looking the way I do, then just ask. Oh, also, people aren't just loyal to Avra because she's nice. there's like an actual cult thing that begins happening and to say there's some weird shit with that would be... underselling it.

A Royal Tale, and Mermaid Tales both fall into the timeline between LR and the MyS rewrite. they're quite insignificant series, but i decided to devote myself to being a completionist.

My plans for them aren't really set in stone yet, but I know i want to expand upon them and their lore a lot more, and they will eventually both fall into the, uh, cannibalism and murder theme of the rest of the rewrites. they'll likely be little side projects. I have trauma from ART tho. Show makes me *uncomfy*

Mystreet.... yayyyy...

No official name for the rewrite yet, I'm working on it.

TL;DR: If you let an edgy teenager write MyS but they also watched desperate housewives so they write some sitcom episodes on the side. Also, Avra needs that gross-tasting nailpolish that stops you from chewing on your nails... but like... all over her body.

Basically, MyS except they've always been reincarnations of their MCD (or LR, in this case) selves, with some residual trauma and habits because of that. I'm going to lean more into the darker seasons, even though Ik popular opinion is that the light-hearted ones were the best, and I'll just focus more on lore and stuff. PDH has a 17 year old Avra joining PDH, after being homeschooled for a while due to having some mental health issues. I'm going to go a little more 'general highschool drama' vibes, might have some mystery shit idk. Will be less cringe than canon, because yes, i'm cringe and i'm free, but even i have limits. The more lighthearted seasons might just be amalgamed into one big 'sitcom style' fic, which will be set before S4 and such, but i'll probably make lighthearted chapters between the serious ones. S4, Aphmau's Year, S5, S6 and Her Wish will be my main priority, and will go into the whole murder and cannibalism theme of LR. It'll already have been kind of expanded upon, because MyS!Avra has a bit of a habit of auto-cannibalism (eating the skin around her nails/on her fingers, on the inside of her cheeks and on her lips) which eventually just... goes a little crazy. There is gonna be cult stuff in MyS too, it just might present differently to how it does in LR. Or maybe similarly. Idk, depends on how you view it.

#tw cannibalism #tw cult #i dont know how to explain them without going into way too much detail i'm sorry #if anyone could do a better job of it i would pay them (i cant actually bc im broke but)#aphmau #aphverse #aphblr #rewrite #mcd #minecraft diaries #im working on a bible of LR info so i might just put the doc for that online eventually idk #lycoris radiata/ranthredo #ranthredo

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jestbee · 11 months ago

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Fic Graveyard Tag

So @scoops404 asked me to list the fics in my "fic Graveyard" aka the fics in my google docs that I started but will probably not continue, and I decided to make it a tag for all my writer friends to do. List all the fics you started writing but probably won't continue and then tag some friends to do the same: For my version of this I've only included fics where I have over a couple thousand words because I have lots of docs with like 200/300 words in and that would be a really long list. Honourable mentions at the end! Working title/doc title: From whence you came Premise: Fae!George and Knight!Dream dsmp fic Pairing: dnf with side karlnap Word count: 7,602 Reason you stopped writing it: I'm not really a fantasy writer I just got the idea in my head and wrote a bunch of it. The karlnap dynamic in this of like himbo sapnap and mage!karl lives in my head rent free though

Working title/doc title: Shiny Things/You Earned It Premise: Sugar Baby AU Pairing: dnf Word count: 2,627 Reason you stopped writing it: I struggled with the initial way in to this as I didn't want to do it entirely AU but they both have a lot of their own money irl and although George likes when ppl pay for things the initial way into the arrangement didn't work for me. It kept coming out a bit more findom. I have extensive notes on it though and I may return to something similar at some point

Working title/doc title: the porn star au that Dream asked for Premise: They're porn stars, Dream is faceless and does amateur solo stuff on OnlyFans but is really successful, George does studio movies and is popular in his own right. Dream wants to transition to movie work for the money and requests to work with George, but no one is actually sure if he's gay or just gay for pay. This was based on Dream's tweet about "in an alternate universe I'm a gay porn star are still get cancelled for queerbaiting" or whatever it was he said. Anyway, every time I read my notes for this I love it a bit more Pairing: dnf Word count: 2,749 Reason you stopped writing it: Honestly, I liked the premise so much I worried about not doing it justice and now I get scared every time I try

Working title/doc title: Tricksy Dreamon times Premise: dsmp fic where DreamXD keep taunting George in the wake of Dream being locked in prison but then Dream escapes and shows up on George's doorstep all traumatised and in need of care. Essentially just some angsty hurt/comfort Pairing: dnf Word count: 4,327 Reason you stopped writing it: Again, I'm not really a fantasy writer or dsmp writer, my friend Charlotte just loved some fics like this and so I wanted to write her one but it's not really in my wheelhouse and so I'll leave her to read the actual good ones

Working title/doc title: the royalty au dream wants but that I didn't think I'd ever write Premise: George is a rebellious prince sleeping with a knight called Dream he doesn't really get along with but then he becomes King unexpectedly due to the death of his father and is faced with the perils of trying to govern a country. He's expected to marry the prince of a nearby kingdom in order to solidify their alliance, but he just can't seem to shake Dream, who has some very strong opinions about how George could be running things instead Pairing: dnf Word count: 1,804 Reason you stopped writing it: Again, not really my usual kind of thing. I'm a contemporary romance write - I don't know why I keep starting these things

Honourable mentions (fics that are a couple hundred words): Werewolf!Dream au - again, not my thing Spanking fic - There are already so many good ones and anything I could have put in this will probably be in a future longer fic of mine Living like you said - a fic with the summary "As YouTube falls apart, Dream and George fall together" about them contemplating quitting while getting together - idk why I gave this up except I didn't have a clear outline for it How to deal with alpha roommates - I so badly want to write more Beta!George like in my fic That's How We Play It (please read, it's my baby) and I started with a premise but again didn't have a clear outline, just a desire for Beta!George fake snf for the bet - what it says on the tin, really. abandoned because I lost enthusiasm for it (Sapnap probably pissed me off that day) Fertitlity stuff - occasionally I start fic to exorcise some personal demons and this was an mpreg one where they faced fertility issues and then split up only to get back together later on but then - well, my own life happened and it made this a bit impossible to continue. This is just the DNF, if you wanna see the Phan list, let me know!! I'm tagging: @scoops404 @czargasm @alittledizzy to do this too fi they want but also if they don't that's cool too :)

#fic meme

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minijenn · 1 year ago

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Jen Tortures Herself With Every Dreamworks Animated Movie Ever: Rise of the Guardians

So I vaguely remember watching this movie at a Walmart once while I was waiting on my car to get fixed. Fuck all if I remember anything about it though other than that people ship the ice twink with Elsa or whatever. So I kind of went into this one for my first active watching of it with bare expectations. How did I end up finding it then?

The Guardians are a group of mythical beings composed of North (Santa Claus), the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, the Sandman, and their newest recruit, Jack Frost. Together, they protect the children of the world from the villainous Pitch Black (the Boogeyman) from spreading fear across the entire world. A pretty solid setup with some good payoff, but... there are problems.

I think my biggest issue with Rise of the Guardians is... well, its ambitious. A bit too ambitious for its own good at times. It has so much it wants to establish with these characters and how their roles and powers work that it sometimes bogs itself down with all of the details and... overcomplicates things a bit too much? Like on its own, we all are familiar with the concept of Santa or the Easter Bunny, and I do appreciate how creative this movie is with executing them and the work that they do. But sometimes, it just... gets in its own way? If that makes any sense?

So a simple premise that bogs itself down in the details. Ok, what else is there about this movie to redeem it? Lots, surprisingly! The Guardians are all really fun characters in their own right, and I loved the dynamic developed between them. Jack Frost is our focal point out of all of them, and I really liked him! He's an angsty little ice twink who can't been seen by almost anyone because no one believes him, so he has plenty of baggage for compelling drama. My one issue with him though is that I don't think Chris Pine's voice works for his character design? Like I look at that character and I do not think the voice of a man cresting his mid 40s. Its just a touch weird in terms of casting.

The other Guardians are also really fun and unique takes on characters we all already know. North is a delightfully different take on Santa, still just as jolly as we know him to be, with a slick action-hero element of him to the side. The Tooth Fairy has a very sweet, fast-paced energy to her, while the Easter Bunny brings a great edge of sass to compete with Jack throughout the film. The Sandman, while not saying a word, is probably my favorite of the bunch though. He's just so charming and sweet and while he isn't in much of the movie, he makes such a strong impact every second he's on screen.

Of course, we also have our villain, Pitch Black. He's sinister and manipulative, if not a bit... predictable? Like we've all seen this kind of villain before, he isn't doing anything new, but he works well as a foil for this team, especially for Jack and I think he's an ok antagonist overall.

Visually, this movie is beautiful, so unlike almost anything Dreamworks has ever made before, with gorgeous effects and fantastically animated action sequences. The character designs are so... un-Dreamworks, but they work so nicely in the world they inhabit. That world itself is beautifully built, especially in its more fantastical setpieces like the Tooth Palace or the North Pole. The score was also lovely to listen to, capturing the sheer creativity of this movie so nicely.

At the end of the day, I think that's the perfect word to describe Rise of the Guardians. It's very creative, with a lot of love and thought clearly poured into it. It really is a shame that it didn't go anywhere further into a series or more sequels because I would have loved to see more of this team and watch them just... be together. They're that fun to watch in action. Same for the movie itself. It's good!

Overall Rating: 8/10

Verdict: All hail the Ice Twink

Previous Review (Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted)

Next Review (The Croods)

#jen watches #dreamworks watch #rise of the guardians #dreamworks #jen tortures herself with every dreamworks animated movie ever

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haunting-hufflepuffs-basement · 3 months ago

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18, 19, 22, 23 (pick any if you have time, no pressure!)

❤️ Jane :)

Hello Jane! I'm thrilled to answer all of these!

18. It's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on. . .

THE COMEDY POTENTIAL. You guys know me, you can look through my top posts, they're pretty much all comedic. I LOVE to laugh, it's my whole thing, it's why I enjoy the things I do: I think it's fucking funny. Marauders as a whole is a very angsty fandom, and while that's good and fine and I really enjoy a lot of the angst, we NEED more laughter and more silliness in this fandom! Like, I want you all to just think about one of the main premises of Marauders: nobody knows Remus is a werewolf except for like 4 other people. This means that he's gonna have to come up with bullshit excuses and people are gonna be theorizing on his behavior and he's gonna get into some sticky situations that he might just have to get out of via refuge in absurdity. Another main premise of Marauders is that the Marauders are PRANKSTERS. Pranksters with no concept of what "going too far" is. I want them to do shit that is genuinely hilarious. Dropping dung bombs in the corridors is first year stuff. Give me Marauders who spiked all the professors drinks with alcohol last night, so all the teachers show up to class drunk and/or hungover. Give me marauders who have the Gryffindor trait of audacity and say the most wild shit. Marauders has such high potential for hilarity, and I'm the kind of person who likes all comedy all the time. I'm not funny enough to do this all myself, I need the rest of ya'll to contribute too.

19. You're mad/ashamed/horrified that you kind of like. . .

"Good" Snape fics. I am a very loud hater of Severus Snape. He bullies children. Look me in the eyes and tell me Neville deserved that, tell me Seamus deserved that, tell me Hermoine deserved that, tell me fucking HARRY deserved that. This man should not be allowed to be in the same room as children, let alone have any authority over him. He's a fucking murderer Dumbledore, why do you let him teach? But, as you may notice, I tend to chalk up a lot of Snape's frankly idiotic situation to Dumbledore's lack of care for his own students and the people underneath him. I find I actually really enjoy Snape and even his mean and cruel tendencies in the right situations, so while I'm pretty pissed about it, I do actually like fics where Snape gets redeemed or gets to have a different job. Or, hell, I read a good DADA Professor Harry fic a while back where he just gets to survive the war so that he's forced to be an equal and a colleague with Neville and Harry who senselessly bully him about it, and that was GOLD. I hate Snape, but I love Snape. I love to hate him and I hate to love him. It's a whole thing.

22. Your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

Hmm. This could go in a lot of different directions, since my favorite part has a tendency to shift and change over time (I read HP when I was 9, we've been here for a while). While I won't say it's my favorite thing about canon, I get ridiculously bothered by people ignoring Dudley. Because there's real potential there! Yes, he's a bully, yes he's a jerk, yes he's a little dumb in the earlier books, yes he's absolutely awful to Harry in every conceivable way. But it's pretty clear this is all just a reflection of what his parents taught him, and when faced with irrefutable evidence that they are wrong (Harry saving his life), he does his best to change with his limited knowledge of how. Dudley Dursley is not somebody that I see Harry ever seeking out in his life in his later years. But those interactions he has with Harry from book 5 onward say to me that Dudley is trying. That he would really work on himself in the future, probably become a bit more separated from his parents (he's shown to be annoyed with Aunt Petunia's smothering as early as book 4, and he doesn't actually seem to like or hang out with his father much). And then a lot more separated. I can see Dudley Dursley marrying into the magical world. I can see him seeking out Harry and trying to build something there. And Harry is a forgiving enough person that I can see him accepting that. Dudley is a character with a ton of potential. And it's potential that I think people would recognize a lot more if they weren't so distracted by his counterpart/character foil Draco Malfoy. Because the longer you think about it, the more you realize that Draco and Dudley are in almost identical situations by the end of the book, but Draco is the only one anybody cares about because---say it with me everyone---he's pretty. Dudley being fat and having the face of a pig means that he gets ignored for absolutely NO good reason. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

23. Ship you've unwillingly come around to

RePeter (Regulus x Peter). I'm not the kind of person who actively ships Peter with anybody because a) I think he's demiromantic and demisexual, which means building a romantic relationship with someone would take all kinds of time and effort on both sides that I don't think anybody is prepared for and b) it is infinitely sillier if he is unrequitedly in love with EVERYONE at some point or another. But I do actually really like RePeter, mostly cuz I read a good Peter gets redeemed fic with RePeter endgame (no I don't remember the name of anything ever, go through the Peter x Regulus tag, you'll find it I'm sure). But also because they're character foils in every way. Think about it. Regulus started cradled in the arms of the Death Eaters and had to come to a number of unsettling realizations to force his way out of it, which ultimately cost him his life (something he willingly gave). Peter meanwhile, was surrounded by every opportunity to choose good, but wasn't willing to lose his life for his morals, and so he threw them out the window and chose survival. Both of them were MONUMENTAL to Voldemort's cause (both in building him up and defeating him) in both wars. They have almost entirely opposite relationships with Sirius Black (Peter was chosen by Sirius and went on to betray him and be seen as the scum under Sirius' boot, while Regulus was shunned by Sirius but went on to lose his life before he could become great and be remembered sadly but fondly by Sirius) but both deeply resent him. They just have a lot of interesting character interactions, and while I don't really like most Peter ships because I just can't see them spinning out successfully, I think RePeter is alright. IDK man, read random shit on AO3 by just scrolling through tags, you'll come across some real treasures and change your opinions about a lot of things.

Thanks so much for asking Jane, these were fun!

#marauders #harry potter #asks #spectr al answers #janeiscompletelyfine #fandom discourse #Regulus x Peter #Peter x Regulus #neither of those are tags you slackers #peter pettigrew #regulus black #severus snape #dudley dursley #justice for dudley #dudley dursley deserves better #Peter pettigrew deserves better #Can you guys tell I really like Peter? I wanna put him in a jar #But not in the same way Hermoine put Rita in a jar #this is a good thing for you Peter I promise

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