#i know i'm missing the 50th

[too-funky]

Tenth Doctor + gadgets

[alessiasfreckles]

could you do kiss roulette #35 with leah pls?

wasting time - leah williamson x reader

35. a kiss against a wall

----

You were furious.

You'd received a yellow card for time wasting, your second one of the night after receiving one for fouling someone in the first half of the game. Even you could admit that the first card was fair, but the second one was absolute bullshit - it was the 50th minute, for god's sake, and you were 1-0 up, why would you be time-wasting?

The ref didn't want to hear it though, and sent you off with a whistle.

You stormed down the hallway to the changing room, hands clenched in tight fists. You could still hear the roar of the crowd behind you, protesting your being sent off, as well as raised voices from your teammates and Jonas.

Leah had been watching from the bench, having to sit out the game due to a twinge in her knee.

"What the fuck?" she murmured as the ref held up the red card towards you. You were not a player known for getting carded, if anything, this was your first red card in your entire history at Arsenal. She watched your brows furrow in confusion, and then your face fall as you realised you were being sent off. When you stormed off the pitch and into the tunnel, she could see your eyes glistening.

You ended up running the rest of the short distance to the changing room, needing to let out some of the angry energy that was overflowing inside you. Once you were in the changing room, you grabbed your hoodie from your cubby, balled it up in your hands, brought it up to your mouth and screamed into it, as loudly as you could.

It helped, a little.

You were still so angry, though. And so... upset. It felt like an insult to your integrity as a player. You sat down on the bench for a few seconds before standing up again, too restless to stay still.

The door opened with a soft click, catching your attention. You looked over to see Leah poking her head around the door, a concerned look on her face.

"Can I come in?" she asked, waiting for you to give her the all clear. When you nodded, she came in and closed the door gently behind her. "Are you okay?"

You started to nod, and then sighed. "Not really. I'm pissed off. And sad, about the card and about missing the rest of the game."

Leah bit her lip, still stood near the door. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"I dunno. I just- it's just not fair! I didn't deserve another yellow, I wasn't time-wasting!" you said, words pouring out now that you'd started talking. "And, like, I feel like I'm not the kind of player who does stuff like that. This is my first red card at Arsenal! I don't need to resort to things like time-wasting to fucking win, you know?"

You were pacing around the changing room by this point, working yourself up again. Your hands were clenched, and it broke Leah's heart to see you so upset and angry. She watched you pace, unsure whether to let you ride out your frustration or to intervene.

"Now people are going to think I'm that kind of player, and I'm going to have a red card in my playing stats this season, and-"

You were cut off by Leah grabbing you and pushing you against the cool stone wall, kissing you fiercely. Any angry thoughts you'd had quickly melted away as her lips moved against yours, too distracted by the feeling to think about anything else.

It was over just as quickly as it had started, Leah pulling away from you. Her hands were still on your shoulders, pushing you against the wall, and her eyes were wide. She bit her lip nervously as she watched for your reaction.

“So, all this time I just had to get a red card for you to kiss me, huh?”

[neoplatinum]

opposing worlds | kim chaewon

summary: rooming with kim chaewon was a terribly bad (good) decision.

pairing: roommate!chaewon x roommate!reader

themes: enemies (?) to lovers, college au, fluff, very minor angst, chaewon is a micromanager!, implied sexual content, yunjin!

wc: 3.0k

even though its below freezing outside, with a red nose along with frozen ears, you refuse to enter your apartment. fearing the demon that you live with, her legal name being kim chaewon.

a major pain in your ass is how you would describe living with her. you would rather step on legos than to live with her, but with limited on-campus housing you have to deal the cards that you've been dealt.

so you pace outside, on the welcome mat, biting your nails. just getting the courage to walk back into your apartment. one that turns into a war zone whenever chaewon's being a stickler for rules and regulations (ones that she's made for the apartment). you finally stop pacing when you feel the confidence back in your body.

"i'm not letting her dictate what i can and cant do." you say to yourself quietly, this was ridiculous. not being able to enter a space that you pay for just because chaewon was a micromanager pissed you off more than you would like to admit.

as soon as you enter the apartment, you're immediately hit with the silence of the apartment. it's odd, and you can feel a pair of eyes staring at your back. you pay it no mind as you slip off your shoes. you turn to the sight of chaewon with her arms crossed, standing in that familiar stance of authority. letting out a heavy breath, you know, watch her folded arms, tense jaw, and the most telling sign: her foot tapping rhythmically. so you walk towards her, like a child ready for scolding.

"what's it going to be tonight, chaewon? cleanliness, manners, etiquette, or are you going to comment about my clothes?" you explain, frustrated. It seems you can never get things right around miss perfect.

"cleanliness!" she exclaims, pointing at the many dishes piling up in the sink. you grimace at the sight, just remembering it was your turn to do the dishes. "look at our chore list! it's your week!" she continues point at the very detailed chore poster, your name in big bold red letters.

you groan and grab some gloves, preparing for the long lecture about cleanliness and maintaining a proper space. while you are busy washing all the bowls in the sink and placing them on a drying rack, chaewon begins listing off reasons to always maintain a clean apartment—a lecture you have heard far too often.

"enough, chaewon! i am not five, and i don't need to be lectured on why I need to wash the dishes for the 50th time!" you shout at her, cutting her off from her outburst. she stops, and you can see her lips waver, and her hands are balled into fists.

"then stop acting like a five-year-old!" she shouts back at you, stomping to her room and slamming the door. you wince at the sound, feeling a little guilty for yelling at her, she just really set you off tonight.

so you stand in the kitchen all alone with the sound of running water comforting you. feeling the weight of your words, you feel bad that she has to reprimand you for things you should figure out on your own. with a final dish on the rack, you sulk back into your room, thinking of ways to apologize to your roommate.

--

"chaewon?" you wake up early, feeling guilty that you yelled at her. even though you were tired of the lectures, you knew it was wrong to yell at the girl. you tried making a breakfast that she would like. so with a bowl of oatmeal and a cup of her favorite green tea, you carry the tray towards her room and knock on her door.

"what." her voice is flat and monotone. you shrink into yourself before speaking again.

"i made you breakfast...listen i'm sorry about yelling at you. i shouldn't have and i let my emotions get the best of me. could you open the door?" you explain, feeling awful just remembering her face when you yelled at her.

the door opens slowly and behind the door is an upset chaewon with puffy eyes and a bunch of tissues in hand. you slowly walk in and place the tray on her desk. she's busy with her schoolwork it seems, but it also looks like she's been busy crying with the pile of tissues in her waste basket.

it's weird being in her room ever since you found out how high-strung she was. so you have always steered clear of her room, this is the first time you've been inside. noticing how decorated the room is, it's cute, oddly. it's what you expect of chaewon's room, clean and proper. with a splash of green everywhere, that must be her favorite color.

she stares at the bowl of oatmeal you made her, eyeing it wearily. you groan at her.

"i didn't poison it, if that's what you're thinking." you comment quietly. she nods and sits down in her chair to eat it. you wait patiently, not really sure what to do. maybe waiting for feedback at this point. she just nods and you finally feel your shoulders release tension.

"phew." you say out loud.

"thank you for breakfast, i'll stop lecturing you so much." she says quietly. you nod, a little shocked at how dismissive she is. walking out of her room, you still feel a bit awful, maybe you should invite her out somewhere.

before you can begin to ask her, chaewon is already closing her door behind her. you're just grateful she accepted the peace offering.

--

she doesn't comment on your poor behavior in the next couple of weeks, you just feel inclined to do the chores that have been laid out. you don't hear from her for a while, feeling her absence in the apartment.

some days, when you're past boredom, eyes glued to the ceiling, and daydreaming of becoming rich. you think about chaewon and why she's so persistent about cleanliness. you always thought it was a bit extreme, but you never came back to a messy apartment. so you could appreciate that, you just hope she goes back to her own noisy self.

it's become strangely quiet in the apartment without chaewon's constant annoyance towards you. whenever you step outside in the living room in hopes of seeing chaewon, she's never there. your mood is considerably worse without a person to argue with.

you purposely leave out clothes on the floor for her to scold you, but she never comments on it. just stares at it and walks into her room. so with a dejected face, you pick up your own clothes. you hate to admit that you missing your nagging roommate.

--

"is that chaewon?" your friend shouts into your ear. saturday night out, and instead of staying inside with the awkward tension with chaewon, you're out here to party your anxiety away.

the thing that irks you tonight is that this house party is definitely a fire hazard—way exceeding the maximum number of occupants. you remember chaewon telling you to never stay in a place that breaks the maximum occupants.

you turn your head up at the question, looking around and you finally spot your roommate across the room. all you can conclude is chaewon is stupid drunk—dancing like her life depended on it. people all around her are egging her on, and chaewon breaks out the robot, making you laugh.

then some guy starts getting near her to dance with her, you frown at the sight. setting down your cup as you make your way to the other side of the room.

"woah buddy, back up." you put a hand between the dude and chaewon, he flips you off before walking away. you are about to chase after him to give him a piece of your mind, but then you remember chaewon in front of you. blearly eyes chaewon, with her stumbling and drunk laughter filling your senses. she refocuses her eyes, and they land on you, eyeing your outfit.

"what are you doing here?" she asks in a slurred tone, her finger wagging in your face.

"i could ask you the same thing." you raise your eyebrows, confused by the sight of miss perfect student chaewon partying on a sunday night. she scoffs at you.

"don't tell me what to do." she crosses her arms as best as she can, definitely feeling the drunkness.

"don't tell me what to do." you mock her tone, laughing at her when she gets mad at you. she starts to walk away, but you grab her arm. "hey, let's go home. it's late."

"no! let me go." she stomps her foot like a child.

"alright, let's do this the hard way." you say and and hoist her up, carrying her out the stuffed house.

"let me down! i'm not done partying." she shouts. you pay her no mind as she tries pushing you away. you laugh because she really isn't trying that hard.

so you take her back home, walking down frat row until you reach your apartments. by then she's fallen asleep, arms wrapped around your neck and snoring lightly. it's cute seeing chaewon so relaxed, you're glad you found her, it's been weird being at home without her. you hope whatever is happening between you two just returns back to normal.

you fumble around with the key to your apartment, and with a final push you walk into her room. unwrapping her arms from your neck, as you set her down in her bed. you admire the way chaewon looks in makeup, gorgeous and very serene.

but you also know that chaewon hates going to sleep with her makeup on, so you rummage through her makeup drawer, finding makeup wipes for her. you take the time to gently wipe all the makeup off, finding it peaceful and fulfilling to do so.

she fusses a bit when you wipe too hard. you pull back and let her calm down, before wiping the rest of it off. throwing the used wipes in her waste basket. when you turn around, you see her knocked out cold, laying like a starfish on her green comforter.

you smile at the sight and then roll her under her comforter, tucking her in. with light footsteps, you close her door, and return back to your own room. the smile never leaves your face.

--

it's been about a week since the party, chaewon was embarrassed that you had brought her home. so she bought you coffee and a muffin nearly every morning.

she lets you explain that night from your point of view, her face goes red at the embarrassing parts. you purposely leave out the part where that guy was trying to dance with her. for some reason, you feel upset when you talk about it, maybe he just looked too creepy.

she dissapears into her room soon after, something along the lines of, "i need to process all this."

later that night, you're writing on your laptop when you hear chaewon's door open. the sight of her in a nice form fitting dress and her hair done up, your jaw drops and you jump to your feet.

"where are you going?" you ask. she's checking her purse for something. she looks up at you confused.

"a party?" she states like it's so obvious. your body is jittery at the idea. you think quickly, she's not going out by herself. what if she gets kidnapped?

"wait, let me go with you." you say as you rush into your room to get ready, no way you're letting her go to that party alone. you need to fend off the creepy men for her.

"why are you going?" she asks from outside the doorway. a little confused at the sight of you throwing clothes everywhere. she even steps inside to pick up the clothes now littered all over the floor.

"just cause." you say and grab your outfit. rushing into your bathroom to change. within a few minutes you walk out ready to accompany chaewon.

she's on her phone waiting for you, and you examine her outfit. you rummage through the closet, looking for a nice warm jacket. slipping it over her shoulders as you both set out for the night. you miss how chaewon's cheeks warm at the gesture.

--

it has started becoming a regular habit: if you can't attend the party with chaewon, no matter how late or wasted she is, you always pick her up from the party. if she was too tired or drunk, you would help tuck her into bed.

oftentimes, you even had to help her puke her guts out from drinking too much. but that was never a pretty sight, so you try and get her to puke her guts out before she enters the apartment.

one night, she ends up just crawling into your bed. when you fall asleep, you feel her body warmth against your body. she makes herself comfortable under the blanket. wrapping her arms around your torso as she lays against your pillow.

you move yourself further off the edge of the bed as she scoots closer. she mumbles something about how warm her bed is, and honestly, even with her taking up your personal space, you don't mind.

it has somehow blended into a habit to sleep together every night when she came in the next night, and without a word, slipped under the comforter again. you let her, too scared of saying anything in case it scared her away. it's become a nightly thing to just sleep in the same bed together...even when she's not drunk.

--

"you two do what?" yunjin is staring at you with her food half chewed.

"dont talk with food in your mouth, you're going to catch flies." you comment.

"oh great, now you sound like chaewon too." yunjin bites her food. you decided to contact yunjin in hopes of figuring out what to do with this new "development" with chaewon. the habit of her sleeping in your bed with you. sometimes you wake up and catch chaewon staring at you.

"so you two sleep together in the same bed, brush your teeth together, go about your morning and nightly routine together, and even cuddle...platonically." yunjin questions you, but the sarcasm is dripping as she says it.

"yes." you answer.

yunjin takes a deep breath before starting up again, she didn't think you were so dense. "dude, chaewon is into you."

"no she's not, just two months ago we were at each other throats. don't you remember?" you ask.

"of course i remember, oh my GOD, is this my real life enemies to lovers slow burn 10k words fic in real life?" yunjin says to herself towards the end.

"you seriously have got to get off the internet." you cross your arms staring at the girl. "you aren't helping, by the way."

"help with what?" she asks, a little confused.

"what do i do?" you ask her. ever since the new habit of chaewon and yours, you've been going through your days all confused, always thinking about chaewon.

"you either grow a pair and confess you want to be more than 'sleep buddies' or you wuss out and just let her continue doing this." she says plainly.

you disregard her comment, "forget what i said." you say. yunjin just shrugs and continues eating her meal, letting you sit with your own thoughts.

--

so you do wuss out like an absolute coward. just letting the unspoken words take over you and chaewon's sleeping arrangements. you let her continue to invade your space, moving her stuff into your room. her decorations, her clothes in your drawers, and just recently she moved her desk into your room, placing it just next to your desk.

you were shocked at the arrangement but couldn't find the confidence to comment on it. it's weird; now you two practically exist in each other's space all the time; just two months ago, you were cursing the world for giving you chaewon as a roommate. now you can't imagine going to sleep without seeing her and her hair roller every night.

sleeping together turns into unspoken dates: going to the movies together, going bowling, getting groceries together, and even going to high-end restaurants together.

it's like you're dating unofficially. those were the exact words your friend told you when he came over to visit. when you let him into your room to show off your movie posters, he immediately thought you had a girlfriend, you had to explain to him how it was just chaewon.

he looked at you like you grew a third eye, confused at how chaewon went from most annoying person in the world, to someone who sleeps in your bed every night. you try not to let those words mean so much, but secretly you're hoping you can officially date her.

--

one night, you go out clubbing with chaewon; she looks gorgeous in her tight dress and her hair laid out, showing off her dancing to you. you recently found out thar chaewon was part of the dance team, often visiting her showcases. now you enjoy just watching her let loose, like a free soul, not bounded by her own rules. its beautiful to see.

by the third song of you two circling each other on the dance floor, you kiss her. pulling her into your embrace, hands reaching her back and pushing her closer to you. she welcomes the kiss and lets you pull her closer. hands running up your hair, tugging lightly.

you make out with her against the club wall, and drag each other home with urgency. laughing loudly in the streets like teenagers in love.

"be mine." she breathes into your ears that night.

"only if you're mine too." you kiss her shoulder, and she nods.

--

yunjin visits you two the next day, screaming at the sight of you two in your bed and covering her eyes immediately. you wake up horrified with chaewon clinging onto you as yunjin screams for the whole apartment complex to hear. she slams the door closed and runs out of the apartment. you and chaewon both look at each other before laughing loudly.

even though yunjin avoids both you and chaewon for the next two weeks, you don't feel an ounce of regret. you can honestly say that rooming with chaewon was the best decision of your life.

--

a/n: i feel like chaewon fits enemies to lovers really well but maybe that's just me. didn't really proofread this one but anyways. posting this piece first because it was decided by the people! i hope it was worth the wait! stay safe and stay healthy everyone!

[okthatsgreat]

did anybody see the newest episode of danganronpa 52 lollllllll

#there is something deeply wrong with team dr im afraid #A DEATH SO SOON JESUSSSSSS where was the ult cardiologist at......... #dr52 liveblog #dr52 spoilers #lee chat

5 notes

🐻 dangronper Follow

Gonna try getting into the new season lol, I stopped watching at season 37. No spoilers please

🐻 dangronper Follow

Okay wow a lot has changed! Everything is so high tech now??? I kinda miss when they just kept it more simple and had them all locked in a school ngl but maybe thats just me liking season 1 lol. Im really liking Jiro so far Im hoping he at least makes it to chapter 3 because I really wanna know more about that guy

🐻 dangronper Follow

You've gotta be kidding.

#CHAPTER ONE? HE DIED CHAPTER ONE? #THIS IS WHY I HATE ALL OF THE NEW SEASONS SO FUCKIGN BAD #THEY ONLY CARE ABOUT SHOCK VALUE AND THEY DONT CARE ABOUT STORY #THAT DEATH MAKES NO SENSE THERE ARE YOU ACTUALLY JOKING #Im logging off.

4 notes

💀 youvegotthatrite Following

12,433 notes

🫖 nagitosleftleg Follow

just a reminder that wishing death on any of the danganronpa writers makes you a terrible person and all of your favorite danganronpa characters hate you if you do that! 🤗 this is danganronpa so a lot of them will die 🤗 that doesnt mean you get to be a dickhead to team dr 🤗 get over it! 🤗

🍳 naeggieggin Follow

oh my god can anybody in this fandom just be normal and not use this weird passive aggressive tone for every single post. the writers do not give less of a fuck and neither do the actors theyre all dealing with their own shit

#i hate this fandom istg. and stop calling them characters the flashback light doesnt make them entirely fake #theyre still actual people #with feelings #danganronpa 52

769 notes

🍀luckyguy Follow

this is NOT what ultimate hope makoto naegi would have wanted

#dr52 spoilers #lucky student killed first chapter <;/3 #shut up you [txt]

4,013 notes

🔧 sorryiwasbornstupid Follow

kazuichi sighted in the new post-season promo video he looks so g.ood .... . id let him do anything to me

🌸 neverminded Following

@kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial @kazuichisodaofficial

🔧 sorryiwasbornstupid Follow

HELLO?

34 notes

🔪 danganronpa Following

Puhuhu! New episode of DANGANRONPA 52 out TODAY at 1pm JST! Make sure to bring your popcorn and your bagels, this episode sure gets.... despairful 👀You won't wanna miss it!

🍀luckyguy Follow

K

🔱 ultscubafan Follow

U

🎆 chickencoopexplosion Follow

N

🫖 nagitosleftleg Follow

G

🎸 lightmusicplayer Following

P

9,012 notes

🍳 naeggieggin Follow

can early season purists please get their heads out of nagito komaedas ass. he does not want to fuck you

106 notes

🎞️ kirigiririririri Follow

Waiittttt Jiro is so cute actually XD He keeps tripping over his shoelaces in the background of scenes LOL he's so smol ..............

🎞️ kirigiririririri Follow

I'M GONNA KILL MYSELF

#he's DEAD?????????????????????????????????

2 notes

🍳 naeggieggin Follow

keep in mind the danganronpa actors are still real people and they can see all of you thirsting over them ok. please be normal. just because they went through the effects of the flashback light doesnt mean its ok to be a fucking weirdo to hajime whenever he walks outside

🧊 kokoroicebox Follow

They're celebrities. People are going to find celebrities attractive, especially if these are people they see on screens and billboards every day. If you pick up the nearest magazine you find you're probably going to find Junko Enoshima in it. And maybe you should consider that those "weirdos" who are walking up to Hajime are simply fans that want to greet him. We've watched these people fight through hell, cry, laugh, and find hope along the way. Of course we are going to get attached to them, especially to those of us who have been keeping up with them for a long time now. You're basically asking a bunch of teenagers to close their eyes and pretend their favorite media doesn't exist.

🍳 naeggieggin Follow

i literally did not say that

🌀 cageofdeath Follow

have you maybe ever considered that maybe some people get hyperfixations??

🍳 naeggieggin Follow

oh my fucking god.

🎸 lightmusicplayer Following

anybody in this thread smoke weed

1,034 notes

🍊 hinataorangejuice Follow

OKKKKK WAIT WHY IS RANTARO KINDA 👀👀👀

#the way he got so serious while investigating.............. #wasnt a huge fan of him at the start but he's growing on me lowkey #dr52 #danganronpa 52 #dr52 #orange speaks!

29 notes

💀 youvegotthatrite Following

JIROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

#FUFUUUCUCKKCKCCKKKCKKCKC I REALLY LIEKD HIM!!!3!@!#(!# #FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK #ORUUGH WHY COULDNT HAVE BEEN MOMO #dr52 lb

8 notes

🍧minimarruuuu Follow

no chapter 1 death is ever gonna beat sayaka imo #girl

#it just really started the series off so well and no other chapter 1 victim has impressed me tbh #ugh but idk shes kinda annoying now with all of her interviewssss like girl its ok to not smile sometimes lmfao #sayaka maizono #dr52 critical #maru.txt

11 notes

🎸 lightmusicplayer Following

guy ists ok hes not actually dead hes just sleeping guys

#guys #danganronpa 52 #danganronpa 52 spoilers #<- ??? just in case

🔍 kirigiri Following

a

🍊 hinataorangejuice Follow

ok queen speak your truth i guess

🌸 neverminded Following

THIS MIGHT BE A CLUE THIS MGIHT BE A CLUE TO JIROS KILLER IM LOOKIGNGGGGG SO HARD AT AKEMI RIGHT NOW

🎆 chickencoopexplosion Follow

i think she might have just accidentally posted a draft lol

🌸 neverminded Following

I dont know............. team dr has done this before where they leave littel clues in places and this seems a little TOO coincidental

🔍 kirigiri Following

I hit the post button too early.

🌸 neverminded Following

KYOKO KIRIGIRI?

43,033 notes

🐰monomini Follow

okkkkk im kinda over rantaro already lmao. heres hoping we dont get another season of him

1 note

[bgomtori]

☆ colours - c.bg

synopsis - despite everything you two have been through, all good things must come to an end right?

-> beomgyu x reader

-> listen to colors by halsey for an experience 🤍

-> friends to potential lovers to acquintances, highschool au

-> warnings! beomgyu pushes reader away, angst, talks on mental illness and eating disorders, yn becomes an insomniac, beomgyu's a year older than you

-> notes! i've gotten back into jjk for the 7th time, and i saw like 3 edits abt stsg to the song colors, so i just wanted to LET IT OUT. GEGE AKUTAMI WATCH OUT

love is the most twisted curse of them all

tired eyes scanning through the folder of memories on your phone, your head dipping into the fluffy cushions underneath you. you didn't want to go through it again, but you couldn't stop your fingers from moving. your eyes watered, tears dripping from the corner. this was at least your 50th time rereading past messages, past folders, and old voicemails you had with choi beomgyu

choi beomgyu, the man that he was. talented, charming, and pretty. he was constantly bombarded with the squeels from your schoolmates along the hallways. however, he would always stick to you like glue, to him, you were everything he wanted. what a trope, maybe opposites do attract.

he was the light to your darkness, even if he stuck onto you like a emotionally attached puppy, you appreciated his presence. as much as you wanted to ignore his pestering, you enjoyed it, too much, to the point where your heart starts beating rapidly whenever he's around.

"ynn, let's go to the arcade after school. you don't have anything after right? let's go." the way he drags his words to persuade you into doing something he wants to do with you, and how your name rolling off his tongue perfectly, has an effect on you. his arms leaned on your desk, giving you puppy dog eyes.

"beomgyu, we have a test next week, i can't just waste my time playing games with you." you closed your textbook, placing your pen back into your pencilcase, making eye contact with beomgyu.

"come onn, you've been studying so much this entire week, you've barely hung out with me." beomgyu whined, using the tip of his shoes to kick your shins.

"beomgyu. this test is important for my final grade." you firmly stated your point, hoping that it'll get through beomgyu's thick skull. you sigh when beomgyu continues to look at you with the same puppy eyes, your words going deaf to his ears.

"fine.." you muttered out, you could have sworn that you saw beomgyu's eyes sparkle when you said that. he jumped out of the random chair he stole from the person who sat infront of you.

"i'll wait for you outside your class! see you!" beomgyu beamed, messing your hair before skipping out of the class like a lunatic. you watched as he left your class, smiling to yourself.

"are you giggling over choi beomgyu like everyone else?" your tablemate, natty, commented. knowing the teasing glint she had in her eyes, you glared at her.

"shut up."

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

"i'm graduating in a month, will you miss me?" beomgyu smirked, biting on the straw of his drink. you took small bites out of the bread beomgyu got for you, giving him a disgusted glare.

"what's with that look." beomgyu gasped, swinging his arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer to him. the side of your body was completely squished against him, you could feel your heart about to jump out of your throat. he was too close, too close for your liking.

"i'm going to miss my favourite junior ever, you know that right? you're my favourite junior, no one can ever compare to you." beomgyu reminded you, your lips pursed into a line, pushing his body away from yours.

"don't you have other juniors to care about? why me?" you asked, your eyes not leaving his own round ones.

"isn't it obvious.." he mumbled, not loud enough for you to hear.

"huh? speak up."

"it's nothing! come on hurry, i have a new song to play for you on the guitar." beomgyu grabbed your hand, running towards the direction of his house. you screeched as he pulled you at a speed you were not ready for. you felt like you were running a track competition at this point, just how much stamina does choi beomgyu have?

your head was dizzy, you haven't ran in such a long time at a distance you don't even want to remember. the click of beomgyu's door caused your head to look up from your phone.

"sorry for making you run, i was just excited." beomgyu apologised, placing a plate of fruits and a cup of water on the floor, finding himself on the floor beside you.

"it's fine." you shook your head, poking the fruits on the plate, not having an appetite for them. beomgyu noticed your odd behaviour throughout your entire conversation with him, from the way you just took small bites of the fruits and taking huge gulps of water.

"have you been eating these days?" the sudden question had you panicking, is he always this observant? your eyes darted around his room.

"i ate the bread earlier, doesn't that answer your question?" you replied non-chalantly.

"i meant like proper meals, when was the last time you have eaten an actual meal?" his face has gotten serious, you thought to yourself, your nails dug into the flesh of your thigh, trying to think of a plausible answer.

"i can read you like a book yn, you can't lie to me." beomgyu sighs, his hands reaching out for yours, pulling them away from your thighs.

"i know i'm always not serious around you, but this has to stop soon okay? don't starve yourself, it's unhealthy, and i'm worried for you okay?" beomgyu carressed the knuckles of your fingers. slowly, you calmed yourself down from the unsettling thoughts that were eating you alive, smiling at beomgyu,

"i'm sorry, i'll stop. i don't like seeing you all worried because of me."

beomgyu's lipped tugged up into a smile, standing up, "i'll make something for you to eat, wait here."

from that day on, you knew you could rely on beomgyu with whatever problems you had. he's your best friend either way, opening up to him was easy. he was your solution to everything.

that was until a week before beomgyu's graduation, you've noticed that his radiant aura was turning dull, his eyes slowly getting more tired by the time. despite that, he has been wearing a fake smile around his batchmates, smiling whenever he was with them, returning the same energy they were giving him. your eyes squinted at his odd behaviour, you too, could read him like a book.

"you're not actually that optimistic right?" you stated, trailing behind beomgyu. beomgyu paused in his tracks, turning to face you.

"what are you talking about yn?"

"you know what i'm talking about. if you need it, i'm here to help you." you inched closer to beomgyu.

"please, if you're hurting let me help you too. let me return that favour. isn't that what friends are for?" you gagged at your words, friends? of course. you two were just friends, nothing more.

"aren't you cute? don't worry about it yn, i'll tell you everything soon." beomgyu patted your cheeks, waving a quick goodbye to you before disappearing into his classroom. you stared at the empty spot infront of you, why isn't he telling you anything after everything? didn't he tell you that he trusted you with all his life, if not, why isn't he opening up to you?

you bit your lips, trying to suppress the tears that were about to flow out. you groaned, walking back to your class as if nothing happened, but your mind was overthinking, again.

what you failed to notice was that beomgyu was watching you from the window of his class, his heart ached seeing your pained expression. he then felt a tug on his sleeve.

"when are you going to tell her?" seungmin whispered, his eyes watching beomgyu's actions carefully.

"soon enough."

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

it was finally the day every senior had been dreading or anticipating. you stayed back after school to watch the ceremony, in hopes of seeing your seniors for one last time before they leave, including choi beomgyu.

you felt so proud for him, he's finally done with this hell, and now he can follow his dreams. however, you couldn't escape the feeling of emptiness, without him, what were you? ever since he started distancing himself from you, you felt horrible, you felt like shit.

before you knew it, the ceremony was over, the crowd screamed in joy, running to find their best friends in the crowd. you did the same, dashing to where beomgyu might be at. you hated running, but in order to talk to him in school one last time, you ran as fast as you could.

finally, you found him, your eyes watched as he took multiple pictures with the girls from his batch and yours. your face fell as you realise that the crowd practically engulfed him, you probably wouldn't have enough time to have a decent conversation with him.

however, your eyes met his, your body tensed up, he looked exhausted, yet he was still able to flash you a cute smile that you reciprocated. he signalled you to go towards him, telling the crowd that he needed to leave soon, and that was when you walked towards him.

"congrats on graduating." you hugged him, feeling his body slowly soften under your touch.

"lovebirds, wanna take a picture together?" seungmin shouted, his hand stretched out, asking for your phones. both you and beomgyu handed him your phones. seungmin smirked, snapping numerous shots for the two of you.

when he returned your phones, he whispered something in beomgyu's ear, causing him to blush and yell at him to shut up.

"don't mind him. come with me, i have something to tell you." beomgyu shoved his phone back into his pocket, dragging to towards a familiar direction.

the walk was comforting, you talked about everything that came to mind. beomgyu stared as you rambled, watching you as if you hung the stars in the sky, you were stunning.

"sorry, was i saying too much?" you mumbled, sitting beside beomgyu on a bench at the park where you first met. beomgyu shook his head.

"i like hearing you talk don't worry." reassuring you.

"what did you want to tell me anyways?"

"before that, take this, i want you to cherish this forever, as if your life depends on it okay?" beomgyu pulled out a ring, placing it on your pinky. your heart raced, the butterflies in your stomach turned into a whole zoo, your face felt warm.

"what for..?"

"i'm leaving daegu to pursue my dreams, i may not be able to see any of you again, so i just want you to have this as a reminder of me." beomgyu suddenly announced. your eyes widened, a lump formed in your throat, leaving your mouth dry.

"what are you saying? can't you at least keep in contact with me? that's stupid, you can't just cut everyone out of your life like that." you argued, biting back the tears that were watering your eyes.

"you're making this harder for me." beomgyu laughed, "you'll distract me from achieving what i want, my priority isn't you."

you were smacked with the hard truth, beomgyu was more determined to pursue his lifelong dream, and in order to do this, he has to let go of one of his dreams, and that dream was to be with you forever. your goals were completely different, you would only hinder his progress towards success. your eyes stung with tears, it hurts.

"gyu, you can't do this, maybe we can figure something out?" you pleaded, you couldn't live without him by your side. beomgyu wiped your tears with his thumb, making you look at him.

"you know i love you right? if you love me back, promise me that you'll let me go." beomgyu forced a smile, trying to calm you down.

"you? what? why didn't you tell me this earlier? we could have spent more time together as a couple." your voice was shaky, you wanted to leave, but you wanted to stay by his side till the end.

"yea i could have, but i guess i was too scared, so were you though." beomgyu shrugged, laughing dryly to himself. he hated this, he hated the fact that you were crying because of him, he hated that he can't do anything to stop you from crying. beomgyu watched you sobbed, his eyes beginning to sting, but he blinked the tears away.

"this is just a bad dream right?" you looked at beomgyu. beomgyu held your hand, shaking his head slowly, your eyes tearing up once more.

"sometimes love can be the most twisted curse of them all." beomgyu chuckled, looking off to the side.

"then at least curse me a little at the end." you hiccupped. beomgyu's eyes widened, softening once he made eye contact with you. he pulled you into a kiss filled with longing and desperation. you were quick to kiss him back, you didn't want this to end, you wanted him to stay by your side forever. you slowly pulled away from him, wiping off the dried up tears from your face. beomgyu took your pinky, intertwining them with his,

"i'll go now, take care of yourself for me okay? please eat well." beomgyu kissed your lips once before walking away from you. leaving you to cry by yourself on the bench, at the park where you first met, and now you've ended it at the same spot.

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

bonus!

beomgyu started sobbing when he walked away from you. you must have endured so much pain when he left you in the dark for so long. his first love, a love where it could have blossomed into something more than friends, crumbling down like that. he hated himself for that, he hated seeing you hurt, but you would still suffer the same fate if you stayed by his side. thus he made his decision that week prior to his graduation.

perm taglist! (send an ask to be added) @mrsyawnzzn @tinyelfperson @woncheecks @boba-beom @naveries @be-argyu @defnotleee

[goldsbitch]

Just don't talk----

-and please bite me like you did before.

p5 to Just don't talk

summary: Enemies to lovers on steroids. Lando is so bored at a gala event that he overcomes his grudge and makes a request he never expected to make.

warnings: not for minors, cursing, biting kink, typos!!! not checked yet

It was yet another of the FIA gala events that were not to be missed by the drivers. Not even if they wanted to, which was something that Lando had wanted to opt for. But no, he was told specifically to be there - and he didn't respond well when somebody was ordering him around. Unless it was a girl in his bedsheets, especially one specific girl. 

She was sat quite a few seats away from him, which he found to be a relief. He was still mad at her - either at her being a super calculating bitch or at her not having a grip on her own team. Nevertheless, he was still pissed, not planning on going back to fooling around with her and risking his career. She made him mad. The way she just sat there, laughing, looking all cute and innocent. As if she really was. Only he knew how she liked to dominate him in bed, how wild she was and how far from innocent she could be. 

It made him furious. Why did she had be such a bitch? Also, why were all of of the people he was sat close to someone so annoyingly dull? He considered that to be a crime. The worst thing one could do - be boring. 

It must have been a 50th joke he had to pretend to laugh at. At this point, all he wanted to do was to escape. But he was mad, mad at the fact he had to waste time here, angry that this was one of the things that he had to endure in order to have this job and furious that she was flirting with some random executive from a sponsor. As if that guy was in any way a match to him. He wasn't fit, attractive and from the little of what he heard, he was far from funny. Plus, what had he done for Y/N with regards to her regarding her career? Unlike Lando, this guy had done shit. 

My god, was he bored. He couldn't stand one more remark from the guy sitting opposite to him. He had to get out. Fuck it all, he said internally, not being as sober as one should be at these events. 

"Come and meet me at the bathrooms," he texted to Y/N. He burned her with his look until she read the text. She looked puzzled and he just looked at her with a look that suggested she didn't really have a choice. So she nodded slightly and left few moments after him, not to raise any major attention.

She wasn't sure what this was about. Still had their last argument in fresh memory and was not looking forward to living it all over again. But, she felt obligated to at least go and talk to him. She was taken back a lot, when the mood she was met with once she found him in one of the men's stalls was not a look of anger. 

"I want you to bite me again," he stated simply, as it was the most normal thing in the world. 

"What?" she asked, puzzled. Shock wave ran through her. 

He ached from the inside. Needed a hit of any excitement available - and she was the best one out of all of them. Not that he would ever admit it. 

"I'm bored. I'm so bored I'd rather be burning alive waiting in a never-ending line at the grocery store than get back to that table. I am fed up by mediocre conversation, people saying this and that, same shit all the time and I have to sit and smile at the right people. Bite, please" he said, eyes sending shockwaves towards her. She has seen lots of intense looks on him, but not this. It took her a bit by surprise.

"Don't tell me you're not bored out of your mind too. I see the way you look, so desperate for fun. I can show you fun." Without breaking the eye contact, he walked few steps towards her. "I know what you like," he knew she was super sensitive the first time he would touch her during their nightly sessions. Before she got used to his body temperature, she would always shiver a bit. Not from cold or warmth. But the feeling of his fingertips on her skin. With that thought, he slowly traced the line of her arm with a light touch, moving from elbow, to shoulder, where he did few circles and then as a cheeky fuck boy he was, he went for the top line of her dress, right where is covered her chest. 

"Bite me, come on. I like it," he said, putting his finger over her lips. She licked it slowly. "That's my girl." He was challenging her with his eyes, had the same look as her had right before a race. "Come on."

Something shifted in her, inhibitions gone away before she could say "stop". 

"Take your shirt off," she ordered without missing a beat. Lando bit his lips, smiling and began on working his shirt off. She just watched, not participating, calculating her move. She loved having his full attention. Knowing that he was waiting, even probably begging for her to do stuff to him. Oh, what a joy to have that kind of a power. 

His shirt was off and he was standing there, anticipating. She knew they had very little time before someone would come in and the risk of a scandal was too big. Yet, she wanted her moment. 

"Say it."

"What?"

"Please."

"Please." he whispered with a need that was so honest it made her wet. She closed their distance and kissed him hard. Her tongue danced with his, having a complete upper hand. Then she bit his lip, hard. He reacted immediately with a slight hiss. 

"That's not it, my dear," she said and swiftly bent down and put her mouth on a piece of flesh on the side of his waist. It was hard to avoid biting into a muscle on his body, she felt like this would serve good enough. And my god, did this send him to heavens. Her teeth digging to his skin, pain shooting through his left side and all the good emotions coming with it. He gave her a rather loud sign when the pain was too much and she stopped immediately. That was when the emotions started really running in Lando. The same cocktail as last time, but now he was ready and looked forward to taking it all in. The pain shifting into adrenaline, relief and dopamine hitting the right spots. He didn't even notice the sound he made when she released her grip.

She watched him, like an artist would observe his favorite muse. Obsessed with him. How he reacted. How he took pleasure in. She would fuck him right then and there, but sadly, reason stopped her. Also, she wanted to maintain the cool aura this got her. Just feel a little cooler. So she walked away, leaving him with his newly forming bruise alone. 

He felt her bite all evening, whenever he turned over to discretely glance over to her, he felt a little tingle in his left side, leaving his constantly reminded of the little slut he was for this girl.

part 6

_________________________________________

@scopeiguess @leclercsluv @sulliamour

[buddierecs]

aly's favourite fic's

this is a list of my all time favourites buddie fics :) it will be a mixture of ratings. please check the rating/tags!

let's hear it for the boy by hattalove (anything by this author is incredible!!!!) "in which eddie attends a self-empowerment group for gbtq men to supplement his therapy, and is empowered to: forgive himself, say "i'm gay" to his own reflection in the mirror, accidentally adopt an adult, make fried rice, and tell his straight best friend that he's in love with him. not necessarily in that order." word count: 56k rating: teen and up audiences important tags: self-discovery, coming out, friends to lovers, pining, gay disaster!eddie diaz.

leave the light on (i'll be coming home) - highly highly recommend this!!!!! by: HMSLusitania "an accident on a call leaves buck with custody of chris after eddie is... missing presumed. while they navigate their new family circumstances -- and fight to stay together, despite eddie's parents' best efforts -- a john doe wakes up in a coma ward with no memory of his own life beyond the knowledge he has a son named christopher and, somehow, he needs to get home." word count: 44k rating: mature important tags: presumed dead, grief, mourning, angst, amnesia, getting together a leaf falls on loneliness by: iimpossible_things "buck doesn’t think that if he were to say, “i’m in a bad place”, that anyone would turn him away. really, he doesn’t. the 118 has too many good, kind people for that. but every time he wants to open his mouth, to say something, to reach out to eddie or bobby or hen or chim, he hears eddie yelling, “you’re exhausting.” —you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting— so each day he does his job and he laughs and he jokes and he pretends he’s the care-free goofball he’s always been. And each day he packs away his bruises and his worries, takes them home to his empty loft with its quiet rooms, and licks his wounds in silence." word count: 11k rating: not rated important tags: angst, fluff, happy ending, orginal male character and i'm not good at winning fights anymore by: spaceprincessem "five times buck needs to feel eddie's heartbeat and the one time eddie needs to feel his" word count: 24k rating: teen and up audience important tags: 5+1 things, whump, protective!eddie diaz, getting together, soft boys in love, ptsd i know you're hurting (but so am i) by: justhockey "eddie understands better than maybe anyone else ever could, how it feels to have everything unravel in the palm of your hands. he knows frustration - he knows fury. he’s painfully familiar with that burning rage that crackles in the tips of your fingers, that makes your skin hot and chest tight, and makes you want to punch anyone that dares to even look at you. but that doesn’t give chim the right to lay a damn hand on buck" word count: 3.7k rating: not rated important tags: ptsd, feelings realisation, protective!eddie diaz, communication, 5x04 coda good pretender by: likeshipsonthesea "an au where buck broke up with taylor before 5b, ravi and buck become (actually platonic) friends with benefits, and ravi, eddie, and buck all go on a journey of self-discovery that ends with them all getting what they need" word count: 85k rating: explicit important tags: friends with benefits (buckandravi), casual sex, childhood tramua, healing, feelings realisation, jealous!eddie diaz, ptsd, love confessions, anal sex

the best life is the truth (my best mask is my face) by: letmetellyouaboutmyfeels the buckleys are celebrating their 50th anniversary, and maddie and buck are both expected to come. to take the heat off maddie, buck impulsively blurts out that he's seeing someone new. obviously, there's only one solution: bring eddie as his fake boyfriend, pretend to be in love with him, and survive the weekend with minimal bloodshed. no problem, except for the, uh. "pretend" part." word count: 43k rating: explicit important tags: fake dating, idiots to lovers, there was only one bed, eventual smut

tomorrow will always and forever now be today (tomorrow is our always and forver) by: withmeornotatall "eddie gets trapped in a time loop on the day buck marries natalia" word count: 43k rating: mature important tags: time loop, minor buck/natalia, heavy angst, eventual happy ending, weddings, love confessions winter prayer by: daisies_and_briars "when a work conflict prevents athena from accompanying bobby to minnesota for the ten year anniversary of his family dying, buck and may offer to go instead. over the course of the trip, they all learn more about each other, and bobby faces his grief." word count: 18k rating: general audiences important tags: road trip, family bonding, grief, healing, angst, bobby being a dad to may and buck, may and buck are siblings

what a heart can do by: bvckandeddie "in which buck becomes the guardian of the daughter he never knew he had. together, they discover what happiness truly means to them." word count: 128k rating: teen and up important tags: girldad!buck, slow burn, friends to co-parents to lovers, oblivious!evan buckley, therapy, light angst, emotional hurt/comfort

[exhaustedpirate]

a kept promise

day 17 of @bucktommyfluffebruary (i'm catching up!) wanted a redo of the hospital kiss and it ended up having a lot of buckley siblings love and buckley parents hate so you've been warned! also, interrupted homophobia? i guess?

rated G | 1673 words also on AO3

He is late.

He is the man of honor and he is late.

Buck is pacing on the hotel lobby, fingers running through his hair, ruining the perfectly gelled hairstyle he had spent an hour fixing. He is late.

“Buck, the ceremony is starting in five minutes,” Hen reminds him, looking exasperated but understanding. “He’ll meet you inside.” 

It’s not the first time Hen has told him that, not even the second or third, but he still waves her away. Tommy promised. He promised he would do his damnedest to make it to the wedding.

But it had been 10 hours since the last text message Tommy sent him. He had a break and wanted to message Buck to say he was okay and attached a picture of a granola bar and bottle of water in his dirty hand - but he had been busy dealing with the missing veil and trying to stop his sister’s spiral. 

Tommy isn’t late, not yet anyway. And for all Buck knows, he won’t even be able to show up. It’s not like a wildfire is gonna stop just so he can be Buck’s plus one. He wishes it would though. Besides, they’ve been on one date, it’s new. Tommy would probably prefer to go home and rest rather than be at a wedding he was invited to last minute.

He opens their text message for the 50th time in the past hour. After he had missed Tommy’s last message, he sent him a picture of his suit, knowing that the blue of his tie matched his eyes. Buck’s next messages were a mix of ceremony schedule reminders and reassuring Tommy that it’d be okay if he couldn’t come.

Buck really wants Tommy there.

“Three minute warning, Buckaroo,” Hen calls out, not really having left. “Get your ass in gear or I’m sending Maddie to get you next.” 

Buck winces, touching his ears. “He’ll be here.” He says with a determination he doesn’t feel, before waving Hen away once more.

Two minutes later, Buck sighs defeated. He can’t ruin his sister’s wedding, not when she waited so long to find someone like Chimney, someone that makes her so happy, that is perfect for her.

He drags his feet on the way to the room beside the garden entrance. He can see the altar and the crowd filling the chairs lined up on the grass, can hear the enthusiastic whispering of family and friends. Notices Chim’s nervous jittering and Hen’s fondly exasperated expression. Sees Jee in an intense conversation with the Lees in the front row. Sees the three empty chairs right next to them and his chest feels tight.

His parents are currently in the room with Maddie, making sure she’s ready and calm while Buck has been stressfully pacing in the lobby. And the third chair is for Tommy, not that his parents know about it. He feels a little bad forcing Tommy into the same space as them but he knows how much the Buckleys despise a scene.

He wants to look out into the crowd and see Tommy there, wants to see that scrunchy smile on his face, the way his eyes get so bright when he does. 

The door to his right opens suddenly and both he and Philip Buckley startle. “E-Buck, what are you doing out here? Your sister has been waiting for you forever!”

His tone is exasperated but Buck can hear the bitterness in his voice too. Their father hadn’t been all too pleased when he found out Buck was going to be walking Maddie down the aisle.

“Is that Evan?” His mom’s voice approaches as she finishes opening the door. “You are making Maddie late.” She accuses and he sighs.

His eyes find his sister and he feels his lips stretch in a small smile. Maddie looks beautiful, the dress is perfect on her and he sees the way she relaxes when their eyes meet. She is still nervous, of course she is, but she knows she can count on him. He takes a deep breath and shakes his head at her. Her head tilts in disappointment. 

Maddie knows. Of course Maddie knows.

She gave him permission to invite Tommy, with Chimney’s complete support. She’s the one who rearranged the whole sitting area so that Tommy could sit in the front row. She’s the one who asked him to walk her down the aisle, who told their parents without a shadow of a doubt that it was her wedding and her decision.

He loves her.

“Let’s go, Evan,” His father puts a hand on his shoulder pulling him into the room. “They are all waiting.”

Buck takes a step forward before he feels his phone vibrate in his hand. 

I’m here.

Tommy. His heart pounds against his chest and he raises wide pleading eyes towards Maddie who smiles and nods. He loves her.

Wrenching away from his father’s hold and ignoring their calls of his name, Buck rushes back towards the lobby and watches as Tommy walks through the hotel doors still in his turnouts, soot covering his face and a tired smile on his face.

“I’m sorry I’m late,” Tommy says as they approach one another. His heart is fit to burst in his chest. “My phone died just as I was goi-” 

Buck interrupts him by taking hold of the back of his neck pulling him into a hard kiss, swallowing the surprised moan he lets out. He ignores everything around him as he focuses on the feel of Tommy’s lips on his, on the tight hold his hands have on Buck’s waist. On the fact that Tommy showed up. On the fact that Tommy is there.

They break apart but Buck refuses to let go of him, to get out of this bubble they’ve created just for them. “You’re here,” He whispers. “You’re really here.”

“I told you I’d try,” Tommy whispers back, hands caressing his sides under his suit jacket. “I wanted to be here for you.”

Buck shakes his head slowly, their foreheads rubbing together before he pulls away. He opens his eyes to see Tommy’s already looking back at him, that soft look on his face.

“Come with me,” Buck says, taking hold of Tommy’s hand to pull him towards the bride’s room. “There’s someone I want you to meet.”

“Evan Buckley!” His mom whisper-shouts, her mouth in a tight grimace. Tommy’s hand on his tenses but Buck keeps a tight hold on it.

“Just a minute.” Buck holds out a finger towards his gawking parents.

He walks through the door followed by Tommy who tries to hide a laugh with a cough, not successfully - it only makes Buck like him more. Maddie is still where she had been, standing in front of the mirror, nervous excitement in all her limbs. Her eyes widen as she meets Buck’s eyes in the mirror and she turns with a wide grin.

“'Hot pilot doesn’t do him justice, Buck.” She comments and he feels his face flush.

“Maddie,” Buck starts as they stand inside the room. Tommy is looking at her with a grin, despite his obvious blush and he forces himself to focus. “This is Tommy. Tommy, this is my sister, Maddie.”

The older man turns to the bride and holds out a hand. “It’s wonderful to meet you, I feel like I know you already.”

“Oh, me too.” 

Buck groans, in faux disgruntlement, as they turn knowing smiles towards him. “Alright, alright, we’ll have time for this later,” He approaches Maddie, letting go of Tommy’s hand to hold hers. “I’m sorry that I delayed your wedding.”

“I want my man of honor happy,” Maddie cups his cheek with her free hand and they share a laugh. “You don’t need to apologise.”

“Thank you.” His voice comes out as a whisper, his chest tight with love.

“I’m sorry I didn’t bring a suit,” Tommy interrupts after a moment, a sheepish smile on his sooty face. “I can stand in the back row.”

That summoned Phillip Buckley. “Well, that is probably-”

“Nonsense,” Maddie interrupts in a louder tone. “We saved you a seat on the front row,” Her smile widens at the wide eyed expression on Tommy's face and how it reflected on their parent’s faces, with very different meanings. “There’s a bathroom behind you if you wanna wash up, we’ll wait.” 

Tommy stumbles as he takes a step back towards the door, looking overwhelmed but happy. Buck gives him an encouraging smile. “We’ll wait.” He repeats and Tommy nods, finally walking through the door behind him.

“Maddie-” 

“Mom, Dad,” His sister interrupts their mother this time. “Why don’t you go ahead and find your seats, let them know we’ll be out in a couple of minutes?”

“Maddie, you can’t possibly expect to sit-”

“Please, Mom?” Maybe he isn’t the only one with extraordinary pouting abilities.

They wait until their parents stumble out of the room to giggle together. 

“Thank you, Maddie, for everything.” 

She kisses his forehead and he feels complete. “You’re welcome,” She taps his cheek with a knowing smirk. “Go wash up too, you have soot all over your face.”

“Oh,” He feels bright red but unashamed. “I-I’ll do that.”

Her giggles follow him into the bathroom where he laughs alongside Tommy. 

And that’s how, among suits and dresses of multiple colours, an LAFD t-shirt and sooty trousers-wearing happily-tired firefighter sits on the front row. 

Buck finds himself looking out into the crowd every second, ignoring his parent’s secretly displeased expressions to find Tommy’s bright smile directed at him. Tommy came for him.

And as they dance in the decorated ballroom, Buck’s head laying on Tommy’s shoulder, the smell of smoke, ash and forest seeping into his nose, feels Tommy’s arms wrapped around him, a strong, steady hold, he feels at ease. It might be too soon but, as they share a soft kiss under the colourful lights, swaying to the tune of a slow song, he feels like Tommy might be the one.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA for getting my dad a 50th birthday gift and not my mom? 🐍🐍

my (20nb) dad (49m) is turning 50 in a few weeks. him and my mom (49f) are separated and she is not happy about it. my mother and i don't exactly have the best relationship either (she's not abusive; just a bit toxic and we dont get along).

my mom is also a disney mom and she insists on going to disney during the end of february. i told her i didnt want to go (we are upper middle class and go every few years, and tbh i am tired of disney and would rather go somewhere else if we go on vacation) so she intentionally planned it to be during the time i have mid-winter break so i would HAVE to go. she also invited my younger brother and sister (ages irrelevant, neither adults).

this happens to fall on my dad's 50th birthday.

my dad has been pretty hyped for this birthday for awhile, and is really upset that we're going to be gone that day. mom told him shed pay for his flight down to florida, but he doesn't want to miss any days at work. she also invited her brother, who is someone that my dad dislikes, and my sister's best friend, who is a stranger to my dad and also (imo) not a very nice person.

what i guarantee my dad WANTS is a quiet day/dinner with his family (instead of my mom's) and his friends. going down to disney is stressful for him and isn't something he enjoys, even when him and mom were married. i think my dad should have a day he ENJOYS rather than being forced to do something he dislikes.

what i'm thinking about is getting my dad a birthday present (specifically, going out to eat and paying for it since its one of our favorite things to do) and not getting my mom one (or getting her smth cheap), since she is forcing me on this trip and to miss my dad's 50th birthday. i know that it's petty, but i know that she's aware of what date my dad's birthday falls on and she knew i dont want to go. essentially, the vacation in disney with me is her birthday present.

she could have done this trip any time she wanted without me, and i wouldve been fine. but she chose to do it on the one week i cant say no, and shes already booked everything so i cant back out, so thats not an option. would i be justified, or is my judgement being clouded since my mom and i dont get along?

What are these acronyms?

[bobbyfloyd]

Celebrating Older!Bob's 50th birthday, and you ABSOLUTELY slut it tf up for him 👅👅

“happy birthday, mr. floyd.” your soft voice alerted bob to your presence. he lifted his head, only to find you standing in the doorway of his home office. you were dressed in a silk robe. deep blue, his favorite color, with feathers lining the cuffs. he could tell you weren’t wearing anything beneath it, from the way your nipples were peaked beneath the smooth fabric. he leaned back in his chair, mouth turning up into a curious smile. “why, look at you. dressed up so pretty for me,” he mused. it was sunset, and the final rays of sun were glimmering through the window, their light catching on the silver of his hair. god, he was regal. even dressed down in a pair of slacks and a cable knit sweater.

"wanted to give you one last gift," you replied, pushing off the doorway and sauntering toward him. eyes remaining on your approaching figure, he pushed his chair back from the desk, giving you space for whatever you were about to do. you perched on the edge of the desk, situated directly in front of him. "oh really? and what is this gift, exactly?" he asked with a twinkle in his eyes. he didn't miss your mischievous smile. "i have something to show you." you rose to your feet again, stepping forward and reaching for his hands, beckoning him to untie your robe. he did so, skilled fingers easing the tie open with ease.

then you stepped back and let the silk fall to the floor in a soft heap. bob watched you through hooded eyes, biting his lip in anticipation. you turned, sliding open the top drawer of his desk and retrieving a velvet pouch. he'd never seen it before. sneaky. you untied the pouch, and then reached for his hand. you turned the pouch over, and into his palm fell a small bottle. he turned it over, reading the label, and his eyes widened. "what..." but before he could finish his question, you turned, slowly bending forward over the desk. that was when he saw it. a glimmer of blue in the waning sunlight. a jeweled plug.

you couldn't help but smile at his low groan. "honey, you're serious?" he asked incredulously. you looked at him over your shoulder, a knowing smile on your face. "i've been working on getting ready to take you. got a dildo that's close to your size. i practiced riding it whenever you were at work. been wearing plugs a lot too. i think i'm finally ready for your cock, daddy." bob was certain he'd spontaneously combust right then and there. he rose from his chair, stepping toward you, large hand coming up to part the skin of your bottom so he could admire the plug fully. "look at you. spent all this time working so hard so you'd be ready to take daddy. i'm so proud of you, angel," he praised, leaning down to kiss between your shoulder blades. "you have no idea how happy this makes me."

you smiled again. "i think i have a small idea," you said. then, you pushed your ass back against him. "i'm all yours, sir. fuck me however you like." you felt his fingers prodding at the glimmering plug. "oh, i will, darling. i will. just want to savor this for a few more moments. your sweet little ass looks so pretty with a plug inside it."

[jalicecookie]

A Duck in the Oven

A Gift for the wonderful @ritualofcirice and her work Hazbin Hotel Imagines and Scenarios Chapter 3 : When Lucifer gave you your fiftieth Duck <3

After Lucifer has given you your 50th duck, you surprise him with the 51st duck and a very special surprise hidden in the Oven.

You knew it was something special to be in a relationship with Lucifer. The king of hell with a big heart for you and a very special fascination for rubber ducks not only managed to conquer your own heart, but also to tear down your carefully built walls - bit by bit - along with your fears and insecurities.

Your life in hell had been anything but easy since you were born. Your father got lost in gambling, drugs and illegal business and your mother was overwhelmed with you and raising your siblings. From a young age you had learned to react inconspicuously, to withdraw when things got loud and not to talk back. Your childhood was marked by instability and fear.....after school you started working in a small music store. Music could heal a part of your heart and then one day Lucifer himself stood in front of you.

He asked for an old record by a demonic artist who had died the year before last. You were able to help the King of Hell and since then he came to the little shop at least once a week until he surprised you by asking you out on a date. You were so shocked that you started to stutter and could only say "yes, please". You were very afraid of this date...it's been a long time since you dated anyone and wanted to think about something like a relationship. Working in the shop and your first small apartment of your own gave you the distance from the complex family situation that you needed to heal...even if it was only a small step forward.

But the date turned out to be wonderfully chaotic. Lucifer told you about his daughter Charlie's dreams, about the Hazbin Hotel and about the new bond of trust with his daughter. He seemed to have problems just like you and when Lucifer said goodbye to the date, just outside your apartment door (he had of course accompanied you home like a gentleman!) - he gave you your first rubber duck. A rubber duck in a waiter's uniform. It made you smile when you said: - I'm looking forward to the next date, Lucifer.

This date turned into several, and the number of rubber ducks grew too. Soon, many different ducks were decorating your small apartment and your feelings for the King of Hell grew steadily. The revelation of your feelings took place at a picnic in one of the parks.

You had tried baking and only baked a cherry cake that was almost completely burnt...it was a tragedy, but even for this Lucifer found a few loving words of encouragement. Your heart beat faster with every word of affection. You didn't know that such emotions were still slumbering within you. But with every date, every kiss and every gentle touch, Lucifer managed to break down the protective walls you had built up...and make you happier and more cheerful.

One year after your first date and the 50th rubber duck you received, you had a surprise for your partner. Yes, you had entered into a relationship, you had moved into his house and met his daughter Charlie for the first time at the end of last year.

And you had taken the girl straight to your heart, you could see where Charlie got her optimistic, cheerful nature from, as she was so similar to Lucifer in many ways. You got on well and you tried to support Charlie's dream. It was not an easy undertaking, hell was divided in opinion about rehabilitating souls up to heaven.

"Darling? I'm back home!"

His voice made you smile and you quickly closed the oven door, turned around and walked towards your partner to give him a gentle kiss on the mouth.

"Luci, I missed you! Aaaand a surprise for you," you said with an almost childlike expression in your eyes.

"A surprise for me? Did I forget the anniversary of our first date...or your birthday...or your demon cat's birthday...or...?" Lucifer got nervous because he immediately thought he had forgotten some important date.

But you just gently grabbed his right hand and led him in the direction of the closed oven door.

"You haven't forgotten anything Luci, turn on the light in the oven, I think it's broken," you asked pleadingly and let go of your partner's hand.

Lucifer immediately complied with this request and turned on the light in the oven.

"Hmmm...the light seems to be working normally," Lucifer wondered and turned to you. But you just blinked at him questioningly.

"Is there something in the oven?" you replied innocently and Lucifer turned around again.

"Yes, one...oh, it's a duck! A cat duck with a pink bow on its head and cat ears!"- said Lucifer, surprised but still pleased.

"It's the 51st duck and the first one to you. I wanted to surprise you...but there's another surprise"

Lucifer turned to you in surprise and even with his nod towards the closed oven door, the King of Hell didn't understand what you were getting at.

"What's that in the oven, Luci?" you gave him a little hint.

"There's a duck in the oven"

"And what does a duck in the oven mean?"

"That you share my passion for ducks?"

"Yes, that too, my darling, but it has another meaning"

Lucifer looked back and forth between the oven and you several times, confused.

You took a few steps towards him, grabbed his right hand and gently guided it on the fabric of your jacket, where your stomach is.

"There's a little duckling in the oven, Luci", you said, happiness sparkling in your eyes.

It took a moment for Lucifer to understand this allusion and tears of joy formed in his eyes.

"A baby duck? WOW!" Lucifer said happily and pulled you into a long loving hug.

The duck in the oven was the beginning of a new phase of life and you could hardly wait , until the baby duckling would see the light of day.

"Maybe there's one - you're going to be big sister duck - for Charlie? We really have to stop by that one shop, later okay?"  - you suggested and Lucifer, tears of joy now running down his face, could only nod - before he blew a passionate, loving kiss on your lips.

And it felt just as happy and wonderful as the very first kiss between you.

THE END

[theoutcastrogue]

According to EN World (I mean I wouldn't know and couldn't possibly be bothered) the author of this tweet is "former gaming executive turned culture warrior Mark Hern".

The Making of Original Dungeons & Dragons is a WotC book that just came out for the game's 50th anniversary, and the passages are from "the foreword written by Jon Peterson, one of the foremost historians about Dungeons & Dragons and who also collaborated with Wizards of the Coast on the book".

Elon Musk, famous idiot, immediately piped in supporting the tweet

and obviously fuck Musk and fuck the "culture warriors", here's how I see it (without having read the book, but I'm confident my guesses are educated enough).

This book is promotional material. The good part is that it brings to light primary documents, which are invaluable for research. The bad part is that it's promotional material, like everything that comes out of WotC. No one should trust a fucking brand (silence, brand) to tell its own story. I've read some of Jon Peterson's previous work, and I thought he's an excellent researcher but only moderately able to pick up the prejudices baked in the hobby. Gets some of it, misses a lot. I'm guessing his criticism came about by WotC's own request, and would not be printed if their PR team (and legal team, probably) didn't approve it. And I'm gonna note that said criticism, while in the right direction (to be clear, the basic stance of "this was shitty, but erasing it from history and pretending it didn't exist doesn't help; what helps is acknowledging the shittiness" is absolutely correct), is very light and very careful. The history of D&D needs STRONGER criticism, which will never happen in a WotC publication.

And what I'd like to see is a comprehensive critical history of D&D, which I don't think exists yet. We have EITHER involved and well-researched but largely uncritical histories, even when they delve deep into the cultural environment that made D&D's birth possible, OR works that explore a single topic or focus on a handful of problematic™ elements. AFAIK. If I'm missing something, by all means, let me know! Here's my bibliography so far (not including papers, which can be VERY critical):

David M. Ewalt, Of Dice and Men: The Story of Dungeons & Dragons and the People Who Play It (Scribner, 2013)

Jon Peterson, Playing at the World: A history of simulating wars, people and fantastic adventures, from chess to role-playing games (Unreason Press, 2012)

Michael J. Tresca, The Evolution of Fantasy Role-Playing Games (McFarland, 2011)

Jennifer Grouling Cover, The Creation of Narrative in Tabletop Role-playing Games (McFarland, 2010)

Sarah Lynne Bowman, The Functions of Role-Playing Games: How Participants Create Community, Solve Problems and Explore Identity (McFarland, 2010)

Joseph P. Laycock, Dangerous Games: What the Moral Panic over Role-Playing Games Says about Play, Religion, and Imagined Worlds (University of California Press, 2015)

Ashley ML Brown, Sexuality in Role-Playing Games (Routledge, 2015)

and the promos

30 Years of Adventure: A Celebration of Dungeons & Dragons (WotC, 2006)

Michael Witwer et al, Art & Arcana: A Visual History (Ten Speed Press, 2018)

Michael Witwer, Empire of Imagination: Gary Gygax and the Birth of Dungeons & Dragons (Bloomsbury, 2015) [not a promo per se, but fully a eulogy]

[aithusarosekiller]

HGIHIHIII U SEEM NICE AND ALSO COOL SO HIII :D

DO U HAVE ANY JEGULILY HCS?? I SAW U LIKED THEM IN ANOTHRR POST!!

HI HI HI HI I AM LITERALLY SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG TO REPLY I KEPT HAVING IDEAS THEN GETTING DISTRACTED AND AAAAAAAAA I AM HERE NOW!!!

Yes I absolutely doooooo, they are my babies and I will gladly share everything I think about them don't you even worry!

ALSO before anyone wastes time whining that jily is tagged here, there are literally jily hcs in the post and I always tag correctly so if it bothers you so much, go to settings and filter out the jegulily tag and then it's gone x

OKAY

- I love the idea that Regulus used family heirlooms in order to make promise rings for both of them because his ancestors would absolutely hate it and sometimes he feels like he has to prove that part of his past wrong and keep pushing back to remind himself that who he was brainwashed to be is NOT who he is. It it actually Lily who suggests reusing heirlooms to give them a new meaning as an idea and he decides to do it and use them as a way to promise to spend his life with them. He's a romantic, what can I say! (in fact, in the longfic I'm planning, Lily having the black signet ring is a recurring feature with quite a lot of weight!) despite Regulus being the one with the promise rings, it is Lily who proposes (it is ALWAYS Lily no matter who I ship her with) and then because they're all for equality in their relationship it's James who announces the wedding and asks Lily's parents and Sirius/Narcissa for permission to marry them. I just love married jegulily idk

- Regulily watch the most disturbing shows together in the middle of the night to the point where James has to go to bed early to miss them or he can't sleep. Eventually they convince him to stay downstairs and just listen to music in his earphones while laying across their laps but he refuses to watch the screen. During the day he's the biggest, toughest guy imaginable. Nothing can phase him at all. But after midnight? ABSOLUTELY NOT. He almost turns into a completely different person. It is not helped by the folk tales Fleamont told him as a kid to mess with him, not realising just how much they would stick with him in years to come.

- James cooks dinner, Lily makes dessert, Regulus cleans. You just know Lily makes the best apple pie with the lattice top and everything 🙏 James can do pretty much anything well, and Regulus is decent at both but doesn't really enjoy it so he does all the washing up because he likes the way it gives him time to stare into the water and think

- not much to this one but I love them being T4T4T SOOOOO much! They're the transest trio ever. They just are sorry, I know because I am trans so I'm allowed to spread it around wherever I want 🤷‍♂️

- Lily gets really warm and stressed under too much physical contact. If they're all cuddled together she'll be on the outside with Reg's face in her neck and one of James' hands on her waist but most of the time she'll only pick one of them to cuddle up to so she doesn't get overwhelmed. Regulus is always in the middle, he's touch starved to the point where refusing to hug him is like kicking a puppy

- In an au where their all raise Harry together, he's the biggest mummy's boy. There is NO way Lily isn't his favourite parent. It's always 'where's mum?' 'If mummy was here-' 'I miss mummy' she pretends to feel bad for them both but secretly loves it

- James falls asleep ANYWHERE. It's not rare at all to find him curled up on the floor while sorting laundry or snoozing in the passenger seat on a short drive. He's also a very deep sleeper, so they'll just give him a little kiss on the head, take a photo for the growing collection there saving for his 50th birthday, and cover him with a blanket.

- James and Lily go to concerts together. It's one of their favourite types of date. James and Regulus go to the cinema (Lily got them into films and they have never looked back some) and Regulus and Lily adore going to the theatre. They all like going to museums together.

- for their first anniversary, Peter got them a little orange tree that everyone expected Lily to care for the most bc she'd always been really good in jerbologj so they're all surprised when it becomes Regulus' little baby with only the best fertiliser and plant food that he forces James to get whenever he passes through Diagon.

- Every morning Reg and Lily sit and do the sudoku together

- Whenever James spends time out of the country, he'll bring back something nice for each of his friends and partners (it's his love language!) he puts so much thought into into each one that sometimes he'll dedicate an entire day of the trip to finding the perfect gift for each person

[imaginespazzi]

Yeah honestly, i'm just grateful she kept shooting cause we all know the old Azzi would have stopped shooting and passed everything up after the 3rd missed shot so I am happy about that. Same, I would have liked her to have gone to her midrange game a little more but pretty much all the threes she took were good, open looks and the rim was just a little too unkind to her unfortunately. Hopefully they finally go down next game, also just so that it boosts her confidence even further. But yeah otherwise, her defense and playmaking were outstanding!

And at the end of the day, just seeing Azzi out on that court, moving well, is always gonna put a smile on my face - whether she's bricking or not 😂🥹

YES!! I think it shows a lot about the work she don't on a mental and emotional level that she didn't take those misses to heart and start overthinking (which we all know she's been prone to do in the past) and I just think it's a matter of seeing two or three down consecutively and she'll be right back where she was.

And yep, like I said I'd love to see her go that midrange like she did against Ole Miss (or my personal favorite against Iowa) and see if she can maybe work inside out but it would be wrong to say she wasn't taking good shots/threes today.

Honestly, it's been such a journey to get to her 50th game (!!) that it truly is just wonderful to see her out there, smile on her face, playing the game she loves.

[dreamwatch]

WIP Weekend

Thank you to @vthx and @hbyrde36 for tagging me (and if anyone else did and I missed them, sorry, please know that my notifications at the moment are an overflowing dumpster fire.)

Rules: Send me an emoji in an ask, and I'll write 3-5 sentences and/or paragraphs from that WIP! No limits to the amount of emojis you can request.

Full disclosure - a couple of the big fics are in really weird places, and by weird I mean I'm hiding from them. So that means I kinda need to creep up on them with a weapon, try and take them from behind, throw a towel over them to subdue them, you know the score. All that to say - it might take a couple of days if you ask for one of Big Three, but I WILL write something and I will share it!

🔒 Fell On Black Days aka The Prison Fic - Eddie lives but goes to prison. Hilarity ensues. There's no hilarity, I'm making him wish he had never been born. Eventual Steddie through the power of letters.

🌊 Like A Stone - Eddie stays in Hawkins after Spring Break with only Dustin, Mike and Gareth for company. Oh, and visions of Chrissy Cunningham. Steddie.

🌦️ Seasons aka Grunge Eddie - Eddie runs like hell, all the way to Butte, Montana via LA and Seattle. Grief comes along for the ride. Steddie.

🥨 Eddie Gets Vecna-d - Eddie stands in for Max at the Creel House and she struggles in the aftermath. Steddie, but this one is mostly about Max.

💾 I Seek You - (Steddie Bingo) 90's/early 00's WITSEC Eddie gets the internet and meets a mystery man...

🎂 Eddie's 50th Birthday - (Steddie Bingo) Surprise roadtrip fic! Middle aged steddie my beloveds.

🎰 Steddie Bingo - I'm super behind with this so if the wheel works feel free to pick a prompt and I'll get started on it!

Oki doki, no pressure tags as always!

@the-unforgivenn @jo-harrington @thisapplepielife @cchapsticck @occasionaloverboy @soaringornithopter and anyone else that wants to play!

[sha-brytols]

im afraid to open a can of worms, haha, but can i ask you what do you like about solas and his romance? coming from a genuine place of curiosity because i never romanced him

i liked him decently on my first playthrough where i befriended him, but when i tried to romance him on another try, my lavellan and him clashed so much, arguing constantly and gaining disapproval like crazy 😭 so i didn't continue it

maybe it's on me for choosing to play as an older keeper and grandmamancing him (romancing him as a grandma), i thought it'd be a fun dynamic but grandma lavellan's freak was left unmatched...

what solas and elnora's dynamic is like? what drives them to romance? what makes them click? i rly want to know

i can't remember if this was sent before or after i wailed about how much i miss blackwall's romance but if its the latter this is really funny. anyway i'm flattered you're asking me of all people since i feel like i'm probably on a solavellan blacklist somewhere LOL

this post ended up longer than expected so um. woe readmore be upon ye

my enjoyment of his romance is like almost purely from a meta perspective so take my opinions with several grains of salt because i am like the furthest you can get from a standard solavellan fan; like on an actual emotional level i just physically cannot fucking stomach imagining myself in a relationship with him even in a self indulgent "sexy older man with Issues" fantasy. which might be the root of your problem too idk what your personal preferences are but full disclosure this is NOT my usual taste LOL

but um. i think for me the biggest part of solas' romance that i enjoy is being able to play off of his character and his flaws and motivations etc. elnora was like my 50th inquisitor so i kind of had the privilege of meta knowledge allowing me to write her relationship to him from a more informed place than someone would be if they were going in blind (which is what i think contributed to me enjoying the game just in general so much, having the ability to go into certain situations already knowing how things will play out and making sure my character complimented the themes and plot structure accordingly).

like for elnora specifically, i gave her a more unorthodox take on her faith (she believes in the maker as well as the creators and tries to follow the wisdom of both andraste And mythal from a place of open-minded curiosity), which meant it was easier to talk to solas and gain some common ground without the constant feeling that you're just being talked down to, which in turn i think made him as a character a lot more digestible to me because i think when you approach his dialogue from a position of genuine interest—even from just a roleplay perspective and not necessarily your own interest in the material—it makes the whole thing a lot more enjoyable because it feels less like an argument and more like a character study (if that makes sense.?) like for me i HAD to detach myself from my character's beliefs to get the most out of it. this isn't even to say you have to make a character that constantly agrees with him because elnora SURE DIDNT LOL but i think it's just about having a character that values his wisdom i would say, because it really shifts your perspective of him and makes it easier to appreciate him as a character

also. yeah. sorry i think the grandma part might have contributed LOL solas' romance does seem like its geared more towards like. mid-30 year old lavellans Max. or at least people who dont have the same amount of life experience that he posits to have. again i think understanding that a lot of the condescension is completely unintentional is important because from solas' perspective he really is just trying to set the record straight for someone who he believes is genuinely just uneducated in a subject matter he is well versed in (you know, it's that thin line between pride and wisdom). so yeah it's probably going to be extra irritating to have a character that DOES actually know what she's talking about and is having to listen to him mansplain elfy shit to her LOL. the power imbalance is a big part of the romance, so it's kind of something you have to accept or at least find a way to navigate that works for your personal comfort level

my favorite part about elnora and solas' relationship i think is that they're pretty much the same person but at two different stages of their journey. elnora is the free-spirited skeptic who just wants to understand as much of the world as possible and carve out her place in it. solas is the bitter old sage who's learned the hard way the cost of his ambitions and is looking back on his own journey with a heavy dose of regret. neither of their outlooks are inherently right or wrong, so there's always this kind of push-and-pull where they're learning from each other but also trying to change each other's minds and they both eventually reach a line where they can't cross over. i think that's why it made so much sense to me for them specifically to have a relationship rooted more in the emotional intimacy as opposed to the sexual and this is only partly because the mental image of solas being sexual in any way makes me feel violently ill.

my FAVORITE part about the romance though that i think is what ultimately sealed it as one of my favorite dynamics is the fact that lavellan can be Angry with him. i love when he shatters her entire world and then immediately decides to dump her on the spot in the most clinical and detached way possible and she can say "are you FUCKING kidding me?!" and storms off. i love that she can confront him later and Not Allow him to play it off like it was nothing. i love that you can shout "YOU LIED TO ME" when you finally meet him again in trespasser and when he tries to brush it off ("only by omission") she just gets angrier and then they literally square off like this.

but like the reason why i like that is because the game never once tries to strongarm what you should do with that anger. lavellan can be angry and also still love him. the ability to adopt that "fuck you you can't push me away i'm bringing you home even if it's kicking and screaming the whole way" mentality is soooo delicious to me. i love how much agency she has in how she can react to him after he essentially betrays her (multiple times) and how that reaction does not necessarily misalign with what she wants to do in terms of his fate. its such an interesting dynamic that really allows you to explore the character from angles that you don't really get to see very often because video game romances tend to be VERY binary in terms of your characterization (and as much as i adore da2 i do fully believe even the rivalmance/friendmance paths fall victim to this). idk i just think it's super cool

also uhhhh i like drama. yeah thats the post