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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

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The Night Shift: Chapter Four

If you'd like to be tagged when new chapters are posted let me know! -Ghostiewvlf ✦ The Night Shift Masterpost ✦

➢ Tag List: @valleys

➢Summary:

You work the night shift at a local dog kennel for boarding and daycare. You love the peace and quiet of the shift, but just when you get comfortable- a few break-ins happen around town, and upper management decides to place your quiet, brooding, shift lead on the schedule with you.

☽✧ Chapter Four: Fun & Games ✧☾

-Y/N POV-

After spending all day in labs and lectures you really were not on your A game for tonight's shift. You felt completely fried- mentally and physically. Walking across campus to and from your science and math courses and arriving on time when you had barely a five minute window between them had been exhausting, and the content in the classes left you wondering if you even had brain cells left.

If you had any energy left you would try to remember to not set your schedule this way for your last semester- though the way your feet dragged as you entered the building and clocked in had you realizing it was no use.

“Damn- long day?” Liz chuckled from behind the reception counter.

“So long…” Your voice sounded defeated as it left your mouth.

“Well, good news- most everyone was picked up from boarding today- we did have one drop off though…” Her voice wavered in uncertainty as you joined her behind the counter.

“Oh yeah? Who got dropped o-”

“Just the coolest little dude ever…”

You turned to the comically deep voiced interrupter and watched as Logan walked in from the adjoining break room with a small black Shetland puppy cradled in his arms.

“Oh my god!” You swooned over the dog and cautiously approached to pet him, earning a laugh from both Liz and your boss as the puppy struggled out of Logan’s hold and into yours.

“Suppose that will make your night a bit better huh?” Liz laughed out as she gathered her things to leave. “Also… Ryder wasn't picked up from daycare today. I emailed his owners and they requested to leave him here tonight, they're aware of the charges but still need to be billed, I left it open on the computer for you guys.”

“Is this the universe apologizing for my long day?” You laughed as the puppy licked incessantly at your face.

“Guess so…” Liz smiled and shrugged as she headed out, wishing you an easy night.

“So, if you had a rough day- I’m guessing you’ll want to finish up that invoice, since you’ve got some furry company…” Logan chuckled. “I suppose I can lend you my son and get started on dinners.” He rolled his eyes playfully.

“Oh so he’s your son now? Have you let his owners know- should I send them a quick update email while I’m at it?”

“Fuck off…” His laugh was much more sincere than you expected as he waved off your comment on his way to the back. You smiled to yourself and got settled at the computer to invoice Ryder’s owners and collect payment, keeping the small puppy in your lap as he absently chewed your hoodie strings.

---

“Do you drink coffee or tea?” He broke the silence between you as the dogs started to settle down from playing outside.

“Um, tea usually…” you laughed softly and gave him a questioning glance, “why do you ask?”

“I don’t know- thought I’d ask in case I stop and get us drinks again.” He shrugged as he grinned down at the puppy jumping at his ankles. He groaned dramatically as he sat on a rock and placed the small dog in his lap- chuckling as it immediately gnawed at his fingers. “Plus I don’t know much about you- and if we’re gonna work most nights together I should probably learn the basics.”

“Fair point.” You smiled and sat beside an exhausted looking Ryder a few feet from him. “That coffee was really good, especially for how cold it was.” You chuckled. “I usually get iced chais, so that wouldn't have been as ideal. What about you?”

“Well, glad I made that call then. Cause I get the same…” He chuckled. “I mean- usually I turn to- stronger drinks- but chai will suffice at work.”

“Yeah, we wouldn’t want any red wine stains on our clothes at work…” You teased as you pet the panting dog beside you.

“Of course not… totally unprofessional.” He laughed along and rolled his eyes.

“Well, if we're getting to know each other- umm…” you paused as you thought of good questions (that were at least somewhat professionally appropriate) to ask of your boss. “What made you get into animal care?”

“Hmm, well I’ve always wanted my own animal- but I’m not sure that my lifestyle or whatever would allow me to properly take care of one, or that I could handle it I guess… I started out just watching my friends' dogs or cats. Then I saw an opening here and figured it would be a nice place to work.” He shrugged and smiled before meeting your gaze. “What about you? I know you worked on the vet side for a while- and you were at an ER before this right?”

“That's… super cute? Sorry just- picturing you- deep voice and intimidating nature… as a pet sitter, it's strange to think about.” You laughed at the thought.

“I know… I don’t really look- or sound- the type huh?” He chuckled in agreement and you shook your head and smiled.

“But um- yeah I did. ER was really cool, I got to see a lot of interesting cases there… and working on the vet side here was nice since I still needed more experience for vet school, but both those jobs were really demanding, and I needed to cut back so I could focus more on finishing school- so this seemed perfect for me right now.”

“I'm glad…” he smiled sweetly, “-you’re smart and deserve to take the time you need to get your school stuff sorted. Especially if you have such a good plan.”

“I wouldn’t say it’s a good plan- I mean, who knows what I’ll really end up doing.” You scoffed softly. “I never really wanted to go to college or anything but my family pressured me into it, saying I could never make it as anything without it.”

“Well that's just- not true…” He scoffed loudly.

“No?”

“Definitely not. I mean, I basically raised myself- I was never close with my family- so I don’t really understand that perspective, but school never worked for me. I ended up dropping out pretty early…” he shrugged and turned his attention back to the puppy, now falling asleep in his lap. “I mean, it’s difficult dropping out so young and being like ‘I'm gonna make something of myself someday, I’m gonna do something big-’ but it’s definitely doable.With or without schooling.” His voice softened slightly as he spoke. You couldn’t help but stare at him, almost in awe, at how much he revealed.

“I’m sorry Logan. That sounds… awful- I’m sorry you went though that…” you paused, “-but thank you. I suppose you’re right, it is difficult for sure… making a name for yourself, or figuring out what to do in life. ” You weren't really sure how to respond to such a candid response.

“Eh, that's how life goes right?” He chuckled awkwardly, carefully picking up the sleeping puppy as he rose to his feet. “Spose we should let these guys back in, everyone seems tuckered out.”

“Yeah, suppose we should.” You carefully stood as well, hoping to not rile up the dogs again as you all made your way in for the night.

-Logan’s POV-

He stayed quiet as the two of you cleaned around the building, silently admonishing himself for his loose lips earlier. He had no idea why he’d shared so much, why talking with you made it so easy to share what seemed like all the most negative things about him. Maybe he was compensating- getting it all out in the open about how he was toxic to befriend so you’d turn tail sooner rather than later.

He couldn’t help the nagging feeling of relief though, having told you a bit about himself and getting such a kind response. You probably just felt awkward, or pitied him, after all. He shouldn’t make it a regular thing.

Eventually when you both had finished cleaning, you settled in at the front desk again. He was grateful when you pulled out your notebook and binder from your bag, knowing you would need quiet to do your homework and he couldn’t run his mouth any longer. He did find it a bit funny when you asked if he minded, of course he didn’t care if you got some homework done, especially with the awkward tension in the air now. He put on some soft lofi for you and scrolled on his phone as you worked. Every few minutes or so he’d sneak a glance at your papers, instantly regretting it as he was greeted with complex molecules, chemistry equations, and the pervasive fact that you were far more intelligent than he ever considered himself.

You huffed loudly, breaking the silence as you pushed your papers away and leaned back in the chair. He turned to give you a questioning glance.

“If you’re stuck on something- I hope you aren't going to ask me for help.” He chuckled. “Because if I lock eyes with your papers again my brain will melt.”

“No, no…” He bit down on the inside of his cheek as you laughed. “I’m finished. It’s not all correct, but I’m done.”

“Ah, well good… its aura is haunting the entire room.” He chuckled, cringing away as you put everything back in your bag.

“Yeah, believe me I know.” You pursed your lips and leaned back again. “You can put on regular music again if you want… Unless you brought your laptop?”

“Fuck, you remembered that I said that?” He groaned and hid his face in his hands.

“Sure do, so when you bringin it?”

“Hmmm…” he paused, humming suspiciously. “I don’t know I feel like- if I had some dirt on you, I might be more motivated to remember to bring it…” He insinuated with poorly feigned innocence.

“Wow, blackmail- that's bold.” You giggled, he merely winked in response, a sly grin across his lips. “I guess I’ll have to think of some dirt on me then…”

The rest of the night was fairly calm. He pulled up some games on the computer for you two to pass the time, and he continued to joke with you throughout the night until it was time to clock out.

“See you Thursday I guess…” He dramatically huffed as he walked with you to your cars.

“Are you pouting about the shifts you work alone now?” You laughed as you tossed your things into your car, he smiled and rolled his eyes.

“Hey, my two to three shifts I have alone are boring now…”

“Right, because you’re such a conversationalist…”

“Fuck off…” he chuckled before pausing as he did the same, “drive safe, text me when you get home…”

He again waited until you were safely out onto the road before pulling out and heading home himself. He took a longer route home this time, opting to stop and pick up some groceries on his way- not because it would keep his mind off you or from overthinking everything he said, it was only because his fridge and pantry were barren.

After arriving home and putting everything away, he couldn’t help but feel anxious as he saw you still hadn’t messaged him. He groaned and took a swig from a new bottle of wine he’d gotten and began typing.

Logan 🐺:

Did you make it home ok?

You:

Right, sorry… forgot lol yes I did

He chuckled and rolled his eyes.

You:

Were you worried? lol

Logan 🐺:

Well yeah you didn’t text me 😤

Sorry I care if my friends get home safe… sheesh

You:

Oh so were friends now? Lmao

He laughed as he sent back a barrage of offended gifs and memes. He couldn’t really remember the last time he’d been so eager to continue a conversation.

You:

Don't be butthurt haha, I just only ever see you at work is all

Logan 🐺:

Well you're so busy with school- otherwise we could hangout

You:

Hey don't blame me- you make my work schedule, you know what days I’m off 🤷‍♀️

Logan 🐺:

Fine… fair point…

Sunday?

You:

I’ll think about it…

He rolled his eyes and sent a few gifs of graves before tossing his phone aside and attempting to wipe the ridiculous smile off his face. He knew this was likely a mistake, but he didn’t really care right now, maybe it was time to make a new friend.

➢ Links:

✦ Fics Masterlist ✦ The Night Shift Masterpost ✦ ✦ AO3 ✦ Wattpad ✦ Art ✦ ✦ Requests Masterpost & Guidelines ✦ Request Trope List ✦ 。:゜:.*∵✧∵ ☽ Submit A Request ☾∵✧∵*:.゜: 。

#The Night Shift #TNS #corpse husband #corpse husband fanfiction #corpse husband x reader #corpse x reader #corpse husband x y/n #corpse x y/n #romance #slow burn #coworkers to lovers #fanfiction #fanfic #mutual pining #fluff #angst #Ghostie Howls #J Writes

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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

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Requests Update :)

Sorry about the delay on requests- we all got pretty busy but we will be working through them this week! Tysm if you've sent in a request!

-JTheGhost

#requests #requests are open #update

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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

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The Night Shift Update!

TAG LIST: @valleys

So, it's been a minute- sorry guys I got a new job and I got sick right after lol. But we're going to be updating TNS fic tonight or tomorrow (hopefully tonight!)

Also, we're going back through and editing the previous chapters a bit... the timeline was a little wonky and there were a few details missing so not a ton of editing!

Hope everyone is still excited about this fic! It's definitely a challenge to write chaptered fics in 'reader' or 'y/n' format lol so sorry for the delay!

PS: if you want to be tagged in updates let us know and we'll add you to the tag list (of any fic! not just TNS!)

Love yall, tyy!

-Ghostiewvlf

#TNS #corpse husband #corpse husband fanfiction #corpse husband x reader #corpse x reader #corpse husband x y/n #corpse x y/n #romance #slow burn #coworkers to lovers #fanfiction #fanfic #mutual pining #fluff #angst #The Night Shift #Ghostie Howls #j writes

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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

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Me reading over any dialogue I've written ever

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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

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This fanfic I’m never going to write is really damn good.

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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

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#corpse husband #corpse husband fanfiction #ic #inciting chaos #poll #fanfic poll #reader poll #fanfiction #fanfic

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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

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That new song tho...?!

#perfect for the sequal to wanderer #if i could cry i probs would #my bones be quaking #how tf to process this agh #CORPSE #Corpse Husband

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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

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Excited for some Obey Me! content agh! I was wondering if you could you do an angsty hurt/comfort one of the demon brothers being exhausted, and MC is just trying their best to help them all? Thank u! -🍥

Coming right up anon! I tried both the dateable format as well as small one-shot below... might've gotten carried away tho oof... -Ghostiewvlf

SPOILER Warning: Super light spoilers of content thru chapter 30ish.

死 Requests Masterpost 死 Request Topics 死 Submit A Request 死

REQUEST: Midterm Stress

---

It was midterms season and everyone was stressed. Exams had been more difficult than ever before lately, even Satan was struggling in areas. Diavolo had pestered Lucifer to ensure everyone’s grades at The House of Lamentation would improve, which in turn not only added to Lucifer’s stress, but everyones of course.

---

Lucifer:

When he’s not admonishing his brothers, he’s up in his room or private study either torturing himself at the desk with tasks, or pacing anxiously as he goes through the dozens of papers he’s balancing in his hands.

He’ll ignore all your attempts to get him to eat/take breaks or communicate in general, not on purpose though. He just doesn’t hear your words through the hurricane of stress.

He’ll look up from the papers at you with exhausted yet determined eyes and his brows will furrow in guilt when he realizes you’d been trying to get his attention.

His gaze will soften as he huffs out a stressed breath before making his way over to you, or beaconing you over if he’s at the desk. “I’m sorry, MC. What did you say?”

His hand will easily find its way to your back/hand/shoulders. Even when stressed, he wants to ensure you feel his affection. He knows he’s not the best at showing them. He also never wants to misplace his frustration on you.

He’ll try to not make it obvious that he’s still glancing over at his papers as you gently reprimand him for not resting.

If you do somehow convince him to take a break he’ll likely be huffy about it until you can steer his mind from whatever is stressing him. Usually by leading him to the bed for late-night cuddles (or other distracting activities) or leading him to the fireplace and putting on his favorite records.

Once you get him relaxed enough, his exhaustion will likely turn to shameful, gushy, affection, either with him smothering you with ‘thank you’s and kisses, or with him becoming a blushing mess if you gave him scratches/rubs/kisses in all the right spots.

A spot you found that always seems to work is at the base of his wings, where the feathers become more short and fuzzy. He’ll groan and relax instantly, the feathers ruffling as if you found a scratch he could never reach. Though effective as it is, you never act on this secret hack in front of anyone, due to the high mortality rate you’d expect.

After getting him to eat and rest a bit, he’ll always be hesitant to return. His caresses, kisses, and words will all seem to linger as he desperately tries to slow time. Eventually the panic of deadlines will drag him from the warmth of your affections and he’ll return to his desk.

On rare occasions, you can sometimes convince him into letting you help. Your grades after all- were fine- great even. And you’d been learning more and more of the language and could convince him that helping would only help you to study it better and see it used naturally within documents instead of textbooks.

“I know that you’re manipulating me into this… fortunately for you, you’ve always been smart- and you have some bits of sound logic in there…” He’d tease with a tired smile. Of course you’d tease him back about being too prideful to admit that he just wants you to keep him company.

“My love, have I not made it clear that I’ll happily admit that I never want you to leave my side?”

He’d act put off by it but you always seemed to catch the small upward curl in his lips as he gently pulls you to sit in his lap, piling a few (much more brief) documents in front of you.

You knew you couldn’t do enough to put a massive dent in his everlasting to-do list, but you noted that he always seemed much more content and less burnt out with you there

He’d trace his fingers innocently along your legs or arms, or lean his face into your hair as he scans through paragraphs of text. You swore that once you could even hear him humming softly, and if you could manage to at least alleviate some stress- you always would.

Mammon:

If he isn’t already trying to convince you to come shopping with him, (if he’s somehow gotten his hands on Lucifer’s card) then you’d find him either angrily tossing things around after getting lectured by his older brother- or on his bed, textbook in his lap while he scrolls through mindless content on his DDD.

If he’s angry and tossing things, he’d stop quickly after realizing you’d come to his room. He doesn’t ever want to scare you, or assume he’s upset with you… he could never bear that. If he’s avoiding studying though, you’re a much better distraction than his phone. He’d instantly shove it all away and replace it with you. “Aw, c’mere MC… are you here to save me?”

He’d lament to you about how unfair his situation is. If you agree, or sit by him and listen silently with that oh-so-adorable look on your face, he’ll quickly lose his train of thought and begin stuttering.

“W- would you quit lookin’ at me like that?!” “I can’t think when yer bein’ all sweet to me like this… and lookin’ all cute”

If you interject about how you know how capable and smart he is, and that he can do it if he really wants to, or that you’re proud of him, the stuttering will only grow worse. His face will twist to a look of surprise and awe before returning back to suspicious frustration.

“Wh- what? MC, c’mon… don’t fuck with me like that… did Beel put you up to this?” “I know it ain't true so what’s your game?”

He often doubts your feelings and compliments, no matter how many times you assure him. He’s only ever been told how stupid and unambitious he is for a simple ‘i’m not joking’ to work. So you usually amp it up a bit just to get the message across.

Leaning closer or moving entirely to sit in his lap and dotingly shower him in affection will usually do the trick. “You really mean all that? Yer not jokin’ around and filmin’ this as a prank?” He’ll mutter out as he leans into your touch, pulling you closer, though with a bit of reservation still.

If you continue to assure him of how you don’t view him at all the way his brothers do, he’ll often work up a little determination and ask if you’ll help him or if you could study together (after one last little break under the excuse of “Well I ain’t gonna be able to concentrate on anything else!” or more famously “I figured that’s what you’ve been wantin’... gettin’ all affectionate and sweet on me! I ain’t doin’ it cause I wanted to!!” all while turning red as a tomato.)

Upon getting all the distractions out of the way, he’d always be difficult about getting back to work. Most of the time you could incentivize him with promises of a small (budgeted) Akuzon browsing break, more affection, or even some playful teasing.

“No! I ain’t lettin’ the textbook writers trick me! I’m The Great Mammon!”

After he was through with his antics, you two would actually get quite a lot done. You’d quiz each other and even make little games of it all. He’d be buzzing with excitement with each turn, not for the content of course, but just feeding off the bubbly, fun vibes that you two seemed to always have.

Upon your first yawn though, he’d be back to getting you both off task for the night. He’d take the textbooks and toss them to the floor before pulling you to lie down beside him.

“I ain’t makin’ a move or anything- unless you want me to of course- you just seem tired. Ya can’t overwork yourself either, MC…”

You’d laugh at his typical sheepishness before shifting to lie on your stomach so you could freely dote on him a bit more reward him for getting so much done. It was once you took on a more serious tone, while thanking him for the help and for sticking out the study session, that he’d almost freeze up once again.

He’d stutter a bit before shaking his head and smiling. “Yer gonna be the death of me babe, you know that?”

Although using your serious tone while praising him got him to give more honest replies- it also typically activated that infamous greed, and- damn he was always greedy for more of you.

Levi:

Typically when he was stressed, it wasn’t you that found him- but rather his shouting and screaming from down the hall that found you.

You’d make your way over to his room, wincing at the volume but laughing at the slew of insults he’d be throwing around at whatever game he was playing.

After you two had beaten the newest game he’d gotten, you’d both come up with a new ‘secret passcode’ to enter each other's rooms. You waited for a pause in his yelling before your knuckles tapped out the tune of the title theme of the game against his door.

He’d answer and change his demeanor almost instantly, though you didn’t miss the flush on his cheeks upon seeing you and realizing what you must’ve heard.

“Ah! Uh, sorry MC… I- I just can’t beat this level.” “No, I know I should study but… but it's just so hard! Seducing humans isn’t as easy as you think!”

You’d laugh as he sulked back over to his desk, often pausing to think of the best way to tease him in the moment. Usually coming up behind him and wrapping your arms loosely around him and saying out-of-pocket flirtations as you snuggled into him worked- if he wasn’t too stressed or upset.

“Wh- I… I seduced you?! N-No I didn’t…” You could never help but laugh again as he’d tense up in your arms. “MC, how- how have I done that? I don’t even know what… what I did or said!” He’d spin around and look to you for clarification, maybe if he knew what allegedly worked on you, he could simply repeat that to pass the exam.

You’d pull up another chair and unpause his game, trying your luck at the level as he listened to you explain with a humorous amount of attention.

You’d explain that one-liners and smooth talking never really impressed you, but when you were with him- he’d always been your best friend first and partner second. That the way he enthused about your shared interests and about his own passions was what made you fall for him. If you ever were curious and didn’t know something, he was happy- no, delighted- to explain it to you.

It was by this point that he’d long forgotten the actual reason for the conversation and instead became a blushy, stuttering mess beside you when he attempted to speak.

You continued to explain that he should think of being a demon and seducing a human as a game. That being a demon and obtaining the human’s trust are his greatest passions, while trying to find a way to spin it so that the human wishes to share those passions. That it all could be played out in his mind by just "choosing the persuasion or charisma dialogue choices."

You couldn’t help but beam at him as excitement grew in his expression, distracting you and causing you to take a fatal blow from the boss in the game and lose. He chuckled a bit as the screen faded to black.

“MC, c’mon… are you really letting me distract you from your real objective here? I thought you came here to help me win this…”

Upon getting the words out without a single stutter and scooching closer to you the monitor, as well as seeing the enamored look on your face, he realized how right you’d been. “D-did that just… work?!” You’d tug firmly at his jacket, pulling him closer as you teased him again. “What do you mean ‘act like I’ve been here before, because I have’?! I was unaware!” He always laughed off his own embarrassment.

A few blushy kisses later, his mood will be entirely fixed, and both of you continue to flirt practice for the exam while taking turns on the game.

Satan:

You heard before that the best way to learn something is to teach it to someone else. With him being so similar to Lucifer, you figured this would be the best option to start with- stroking his ego.

He’d be in the library, fervently flipping through several different books scattered around him. It was always a wonder how he managed to keep things sorted in his head when his workspaces- and room- always seemed to look like the aftermath of a natural disaster.

He wouldn't initially notice you until you physically made your presence known, either by brushing the hair from his face or sitting calmly beside him.

He never liked when you’d immediately tried to fix his problems for him. Asking if he needed help or what he was studying only frazzled him more. So you sat quietly beside him, switching between watching videos of cats on your DDD to draw his attention (you secretly had a folder of them saved for instances just like this), and examining the texts he was going through.

Slowly you’d intrude more- bit by bit. You’d trace your fingers along his hand or arm, or lean in closer to him to read something from a book further from you until he opened up. You made sure to repress the urge to laugh and beam at him as he quietly muttered things to himself, his look of concentration was just too cute.

After a few minutes, he’d usually open up by offering a short snappy complaint about whatever it was that was bothering him. “Can you believe this? I’ve been here for hours and I still cannot find the origins of this potion ingredient. These curriculums are made for morons like Mammon to pass, why can I not find this?”

Typically, much like his brothers, his sin would be his undoing. He’d spend much of his time fuming about something when the answer was right in front of him, he was just tunnel visioning on the frustration and wrath and unable to see it.

Sometimes you could get away with offering a gentle nudge towards the answer, but if he was really worked up- you’d even gone as far as editing a Wiki article to contain it, just so he wouldn’t get more frustrated when you pointed it out, usually right where he’d spent hours searching.

You decided the former was the way to go in this situation as you groaned in agreement, stating you’d been stuck on the same exact thing and thought that he could help you. “See?! We’re the two best performing students, and we’re struggling! This question is absolutely ridiculous.”

You nodded and waited a moment before tugging him away from the books, nearly melting as he easily caved and moved his undivided attention to you instead. “A break doesn’t sound too bad… Perhaps I am a bit fried. I’m sorry I’m not of any help to you either…” He’d pull you closer to kiss you.

Once you got him to let it go for the night, he was easily ushered to his room. You relaxed in his bed as he watched the new cat videos you’d saved for him, contently telling you all about the breeds and their characteristics as you massaged out the knots in his shoulders from studying.

After he managed to calm down and eventually fall asleep, you took the book with the answer in it and left a post-it note on the page, explaining that you ‘thought it might be this’ but still didn't understand the reasoning why it was used in this potion. You curled back into bed with him, knowing that he’d grow wise to your feigned ignorance in the morning but he would still explain it to you. It was a good thing that the admonishing smirk he always made looked good on him.

Asmo:

Whenever he was overwhelmed, he made sure everyone in the HoL knew about it. The dramatics always went to an all time high. He would start by whining and sighing dramatically near you, hoping you’d take pity on him and make it all better.

Of course you always would. Seeing him in such a state not only upset you- but was also unsettling- he was always in a good mood, so seeing him upset (no matter how exaggerated it was) was cause for concern to you.

Sometimes you’d start off by questioning the validity of his dramatics, which either led to him upping the ante on them- or admitting it wasn't that bad, but you should still comfort him. Other times, you could tell he was really struggling, and you would give him an equal amount of coddling for the theatrics. This is what he adored most.

He’d let himself melt into your arms (without putting his whole weight into your grasp, you were still his precious little human after all) and he’d begin to tell the tale of his woes; how Lucifer was cruel to him and bruising his ego, how the professors were just jealous and used the grades to get back at him for his beauty, how he didn’t even need to know these things- not when he was so charming.

You’d play along with it, nodding in agreement and offering up complements in the pauses he took or brushing his hair from his eyes as he spoke. Your sweet words and gestures would have him swooning in seconds.

“MC, you’re the only one in this house that truly understands me… you and I are perfect for each other you know that?” You’d feel yourself blush as he’d shower you in compliments, his pupils practically turning into hearts as he gazed at you.

Eventually you could convince him that, although you thought he was perfect as is, some people were just blinded by his beauty, and needed to be convinced that his mind was equally as beautiful.

He’d ponder it for a moment before laughing and agreeing, of course he’d request help to improve this ‘mental beauty’ of his. You’d smile back, knowing exactly where this was headed and go to help him study.

Every so often as you helped him though, he’d obviously become distracted and suggest breaks. (None of these boys have an attention span, bless ‘em.) He’d trace his hand up your thigh or your side, gradually but quickly losing focus as you read the textbook aloud.

“MC, how can I be expected to focus when your lips move like that as you speak?” He’d question in a suggestive tone. He’d suggest that you give him incentives to keep him on track (with your consent of course-)

Although immune to his charm ability, you were a sucker for his cute pouty look, plus you did want to help him avoid further stress and lectures from Lucifer and Diavolo, so you’d agree to a few sultry breaks every now and again.

Once you both felt more confident with his understanding of the material, you’d usually give in to much more long lasting rewards, he was the avatar of lust, after all.

He’d always smother you with compliments and praise afterwards- rewards included or not- he adored how much you cared for him and the time you two spent together.

You did have to admit that his honeyed words were more than nice to hear, so any time that he needed help, you’d be ready to assist.

Beel:

You always enjoyed helping the avatar of glutton cheer up. You weren't the best in the kitchen, but in the human realm you’d done your fair share of baking. The pandemic had left you with lots of time, and that time was spent honing in obscure crafts you never thought to try.

After various hours spent watching cooking videos on Youtube and practicing with all that extra time on your hands, you could throw together some amazing desserts and pastries. Since moving into the HoL, he was always begging for you to make something for him.

You were usually alerted to his sour mood by a dreadful empty aura surrounding the kitchen as he stared into the empty fridge with contempt. You hated to imagine how hungry he must feel, but he did always look adorable when he pouted. You’d approach him and wrap yourself around his arm, knowingly asking what was wrong.

“So hungry…” he’d murmur softly, his words always seemed like they were exhausting to voice. You’d promptly pry for more- knowing he was only this hungry when he was upset- his own exaggerated version of stress eating.

Upon learning the real issue, you offered to make him his favorite batch of cookies if he’d promise to study while you baked. You’d swoon at his face liting up as he agreed.

As you mixed together the ingredients, you’d explain concepts for him and quiz him afterwards- being sure to always keep his hunger in mind by giving him samples periodically to placate him. The less hungry he was- the more he could think and understand concepts better.

He’d happily lick spoons and whisks you offered him and recite what you’d explained. You always made sure to quadruple the recipe, and always set aside some batter or dough before baking the cookies (he’d once reached in the oven and burned himself because eight minutes was just too long.)

After he’d devoured the dough, the cookies were usually done. You’d continue quizzing him by frosting the answers onto them as they cooled. If he got it correct you’d smile and hand it to him, hoping he’d remember them for the exam being that he’d seen it atop his favorite thing besides you of course.

He usually was solid on the lesson once the cookies were gone, and you always praised him for working so hard. Not that you thought it was out of the ordinary for him, but simply because you adored the flustered face he made when you did. His cheeks would heat and he’d look at his fumbling hands in his lap, quietly thanking you for your help.

You couldn't ever resist wrapping your arms around him and planting a kiss on his forehead or lips when he was seated in the kitchen all nervous like this, especially since it was one of the few times you could ever reach.

Once all the surgery warmth of the cookies settled in with the mental exhaustion of studying, he’d often very shyly ask you to stay in his room with him. Not only did you relieve him of his nightmares, but he loved having you to cuddle up with at night.

Although he and Belphie shared a room, usually his twin would have already escaped to the attic to get some sleep, having missed out on so many naps due to his brother and his brother’s stomach’s loud complaints all day. You felt bad for his loss of sleep, but were more than grateful to have the room to yourselves, allowing you to be as grossly adorable together as you wanted- with no groans of embarrassment from the other side of the room.

Belphie:

You could always tell when he was in distress. He always slept like a rock, a very cute rock, that was nice to snuggle up to, but when he got an earful from the eldest from bad test scores, he tossed and turned, muttering anxiously as he snoozed beside you. You would often nudge him softly to wake him, feeling bad but knowing the sleep wasn't restful. If he wasn't sleeping, you’d find him pacing in the planetarium, but he’d quickly agree to go hang out in bed once you suggested it.

He’d be grumpy for a few minutes, but eventually would come around, venting to you once you gave him some physical affection. Brushing his hair aside, showering him with dozens of soft kisses, scooching up to him to snuggle, and initiating some spicier affection, were among his favorites.

After helping to improve his mood, he was pretty easy to motivate into studying, he didn’t like arguing with you and he knew you always had his wishes for sleep and his best interests in mind. Regardless though, he’d always do as you asked- especially if he knew you’d be proud of him after- he loved the face you made when you were.

He’d only interrupt occasionally with yawns or requests to take ‘just a fifteen-minute' nap. Eventually, you suggested that he try out a modified version of the study method you learned during one of your more difficult semesters in your human realm school; to work for 45 minutes and take a 30-minute break. It gave him time to sleep but also ensured that he’d wake up and work again.

The method worked wonders for him, and he of course loved the built-in snuggled-up naps too. You couldn’t really complain, so long as he found it helpful- you were more than happy to cuddle up under his soft blankets and get some extra sleep. (Diavolo only knows you needed it with all these boys)

After making sure he was solid on all the concepts, you would both either reward yourselves with a nap and no alarm set again, or if for some reason he was feeling more well-rested, you’d go up to the attic or planetarium and talk, hangout, or reward yourselves for all the hard work.

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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

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controversial writing tip

open a document and start writing

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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

Text

The Night Shift: Chapter Three

If you'd like to be tagged when new chapters are posted let me know! -Ghostiewvlf

✦✦Update: Edited slightly :) -Ghostiewvlf

✦ The Night Shift Masterpost ✦

➢ Tag List: @valleys

➢Summary:

☽✧ Chapter Three: Musically In Tune ✧☾

-Y/N POV-

Your second class wasn't supposed to start for another fifteen minutes, but you really didn't have the energy to get out of bed. You hated that you only had one day off work, sure your job was alright, but using your other day off as the day to schedule all your classes was really not the move, because now you didn't want to attend the lectures. The text that popped up on your phone didn't help focusing much either. Why was he texting you? Did he want you to come in on your day off?

Logan 🐺:

Hows school nerd?

“Weird” You said aloud, laughing to yourself as the small adrenaline rush of having to come in dissipated.

You:

Not exactly better than work, but not worse

Logan 🐺:

I can always call you in for an ‘emergency’ haha

You:

No thanks! Lol

Next thing you knew your phone was flooding with sad cat memes about school. Your face quickly started to ache from laughing so much.

Logan 🐺:

Don’t tell the boss im memeing on company time

You:

You are my boss stupid

Logan 🐺:

Oh, yeah… guess I am ;)

It was so bizarre seeing this side of him. In just a week he had gone from this “quiet shift lead that no one really wants to talk to” to “coworker that you look forward to working with everyday” to now, acquaintances? Friends? You didn't really know. It was hard for you to draw lines between stages of friendship at work. Maybe he was just being nice to make you feel more comfortable around him?

Logan 🐺:

So… what class are you in right now?

You:

Just about to start music theory

Logan 🐺:

RIP haha

Need any help studying? I’m pretty good with music

You:

I might take you up on that actually lol

I never have time for this class so now im nearly failing

Logan 🐺:

Bring your stuff next shift and we’ll work on it :)

You:

Thank youuuu :’)

You turned the screen off on your phone and tried your best to pay attention during your lecture, but you couldn't shake the nervous energy you had built up thinking about the next shift working with him.

It didn't take long for the next workday to arrive. You had barely slept at all, staying up studying and trying to catch up in your other courses was beginning to take a toll on you. You arrived barely on time for your shift, quickly getting the usual updates from departing day staff before clocking in. You headed into the break room and set your things down before collapsing into the seat and catching your breath. You’d just barely remembered to grab your music theory notes and homework, collecting them in a rush and making you run just enough behind that you’d be late if you picked up food for the shift. At least you would be able to get some help from Logan tonight though and hopefully your next exam would go over better than the last.

The day shift quickly finished up and clocked out. Logan seemed to be running a bit late, so once everyone else had clocked out and left you began the duties of the night. You were on your second rotation of letting dogs out when you heard his car pull up, so you didn't turn to look when you heard the backdoor open and a few more dogs run out. You continued playing with one of the more shy dogs that was boarding for the night and watched to make sure everyone was getting along.

“Hey there.” You felt a warm hand on your back, a sharp contrast with the bite in the cold fall air. You tried to ignore the nagging feeling in the pit of your stomach acting up.

“Oh hey!” a slightly-too-loud laugh falling from your lips.

“I stopped at Starbucks and got us some coffee.” An uneven smile painted his face, making him look almost comical with his cold bitten nose and pale skin, along with those signature dark circles under his eyes.

“Oh wow, thank you! I was running late and wasn't able to stop for anything today.” You smiled and accepted the warm cup and took an eager sip, grateful to have some caffeine for the night.

“Oh huh, perfect timing I guess? You're welcome.” He chuckled and offered a smile just as warm as the cup in your hands. “I can order some food or snacks later too.” He took a sip of his own cup and huffed, his breath forming a small cloud in front of him due to the freezing temperature. As much as you despised the cold and how it made your already poor circulation in your hands feel like pins and needles, you did really love the aesthetics of it: the clouds of breath, the way it made faces redden, the smell that was draped across everything the night before a big thunderstorm or heavy snowfall, the oversized hoodies and layered outfits that everyone seemed buried in, big boots with chunky socks- it was all very comforting in a way, it seemed to round out the edges in a very sharp world.

The night went by much the same as it began. There was a very comforting feeling about the weather and the mood that you were both in, even the dogs seemed very subdued. Time seemed to go by a bit slower, which you happily welcomed after weeks of vigorous study.

Though time seemed to be lulling along peacefully, you got your nightly duties done in record time. You blamed the unusually well behaved dogs. It wasn't long before you were both sitting at the front desk again, joking around and playing some light music. He hesitantly showed you a few of his favorite bands. You assumed his apprehension was from fear of judgment. Lucky for him, you both enjoyed darker, more melancholy music.

You both listened to his Spotify playlist while he helped you on your coursework. You bopped along to several songs you recognized as he read through your work. BONES, Xavier Wulf, and several other artists played softly through the speakers.

“Mm, yeah not this one…” You sheepishly laughed as you clicked skip on Cholesterol, not needing to feel too melancholic tonight. He merely chuckled and nodded with firm agreement. You were surprised by his knowledge about music, he helped you get through the entirety of your homework, as well as explained a bunch of the questions you’d missed on the last exam you brought with you.

“How do you know all this? I feel like you know more than my professor honestly…” You laughed as you finished up the last question and shut your notebook. He’d managed to explain everything all in a way that was actually making sense to you. He’d even related back to songs that played out softly on the speakers and used them as examples to the concepts.

“I sincerely fucking doubt that…” He chuckled tiredly. “I just- know music I guess… I spend a lot of time with and around it, I uh- I’ve even made a couple songs myself…” You smiled as you caught the red tint on his heated cheeks.

“Wait really?” You gave him a surprised look.

“Yeah, I don’t know if they're any good, but I like making them.” He shrugged and passed you the keyboard and mouse to play music.

“Can I hear one?” You pried, making him slump into his chair further and groan softly.

“Ahh I don’t know, y/n…” He huffed and rolled his eyes playfully. “I haven't really shown anyone, but I guess if you promise to not make fun of me…” he turned slightly and narrowed his eyes at you, “...or tell anyone here- maybe I’ll bring my computer next time or something…”

“Hmm, we’ll see…” You squinted back, jokingly challenging him before laughing.

“I’ll write you up I swear to god y/n…” He joked back, laughing along with you.

“OoOkay boss man…”

➢ Links:

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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

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The Night Shift: Chapter Two

If you'd like to be tagged when new chapters are posted let me know!

-Ghostiewvlf

✦✦Update: Edited slightly :) -Ghostiewvlf

✦ The Night Shift Masterpost ✦

➢ Tag List: @valleys

➢Summary:

☽✧ Chapter Two: Hesitancy ✧☾

-Y/N POV-

The next few shifts with him were pretty uneventful. Logan sustained his normal, more closed off, demeanor- though it seemed he opened up a lot more when it was just the two of you and no other staff or customers. It was nice getting to know him on a level besides ‘young guy that happened to be in charge but never acted like it.’

“I never really wanted this position, you know.” He muttered softly.

“What?” You hadn't expected him to change the subject so quickly. You’d finished early tonight, on account of the small number of animals that were boarding along with the cold weather outside preventing longer playgroups for them. You'd just been joking around about a crazy customer that kept calling after hours.

“Shift lead. I know no one here really sees me as a boss, I like it and all but… for what they’re expecting of me, vs what theyre paying me… its fucking ridiculous.” He laughed and scrolled through his Twitter feed on the work computer.

“Isn't that how they always get you?” You laughed lightly. Neither the company, nor the industry itself, were known for the competitive pay or the proper treatment of staff.

“Pretty much. I was just too desperate for any type of raise since I just lost my- roommate or whatever.” He rolled his eyes. “Shits fuckin difficult.”

“I’m sorry man, did you wanna talk about it?” You offered softly, unsure of how to react to him willingly telling you all this.

“No- no, just- I don't know. I just don't want you to see me as this, like, hard ass or something you know? I hear the conversations behind closed doors.” He laughed. “Ever since I got ‘promoted’ everyone hates working with me. They think that either I’m a rat, or that I didn't deserve the position… It doesn't bother me too much but, I don't know- if we're gonna be working together almost every night, I just hope you don’t see me that way I suppose. It would make things easier.”

“I don’t. I mean- it is strange suddenly like- working one-on-one with just your shift lead, but I don't know, I guess you and I have the same kind of work ethic so it kind of works out.” You chuckled and shrugged.

“True.” He gave you a tired smile before his eyes widened a bit. “Shit I never paid up on that IOU huh?” He pulled out his phone and leaned back in the reception chair next to you. “How does pizza sound?” He raised an eyebrow and smiled a crooked grin.

“You don't have to do that.” You laughed. “I was pretty used to working these shifts solo, so having you to help just makes it easier, you napping on the job didn't affect me much.” You nudged his chair lightly with your shoe, pushing it slightly.

“Whatever, I always keep my word, so I’m getting us pizza, it sounds fire right now.” He rolled his eyes and pushed you back before turning his attention to his phone again. “Pepperoni sound good?”

“Sounds good to me.” You shrugged and smiled at him.

---

Once the end of your shift rolled around, he clocked both of you out before waiting at the door while you gathered up your things. He flashed you a tired smile when you finally headed over to the door.

“You didn’t need to wait for me… you’re exhausted you should've headed out.” You stated as you both made your way out after locking up.

“It’s fuckin dark out here though… I mean- wasn't management's whole point of having two of us work so that we’re safe?” He teased in a soft mocking tone while he walked you over to your car. “Can’t let those hooligans get to us underpaid staff.”

“Yeah I suppose so…” You laughed and stopped at your car door, unlocking it and tossing your bag in. “Well, thank you anyways- you get home safe.”

“You too, y/n.” He smiled and gave you a nod before hopping into his own car. This was such a new side of him to you. Night shifts were actually becoming fun like day shifts with Liz were before switching over. It was nice that you actually got to talk and be friendly. You were actually starting to look forward to working the next shift with Logan.

-Logan’s POV-

He sat and let his car warm up, keeping an eye on you to ensure your car started and you could be on your way home. Once you’d left the lot he let out a huff of breath he hadn't realized he’d been holding. He hadn’t exactly meant to reveal so much about himself, it just seemed to slip out so easily. He took his phone and connected it to the stereo before putting on one of his playlists and starting his own drive home.

He had to admit to himself, working the later shifts with you had been much nicer than the day shifts. He was finding himself looking forward to them, even the days he pulled a double. You were a dedicated worker, and it was obvious that you showed up for much more than a paycheck, you really did care about the work you put in and the animal’s happiness. He respected it, though he found it a bit funny; you seemed to be on the same page as him when it came to certain policies or disliking the culture within the field- yet you never cut corners when it came to the important tasks or taking care of the animals. He understood now why management had been so lackluster about choosing him as shift lead- you had obviously been their first choice, given the extensive experience and expertise you had in the field, but since you were only part-time- they couldn’t give you the title of lead. He wondered if they had even approached you about it or not.

Not that any of it mattered at all to him, afterall he was keeping you at an arm's-length from him. He didn’t need anyone new in his life, and judging on how similar you were to him, you’d be fast friends for sure. He didn’t need to see the disappointment grow in your face as you slowly got to know him, and he didn’t need to watch another person walk out of his life- after all, you were smart, and funny… and kind, you would quickly grow wise to what a degenerate he truly was.

Once he got home he grabbed a snack before quickly retreating to his room. He still wasn’t fully able to exist comfortably in the living room or kitchen, even his bedroom it was difficult. There were far too many memories of when he wasn’t living alone that taunted him out there. Everywhere he looked in his apartment he seemed to be bombarded with flashbacks of her and the life they’d had together before she inevitably broke him.

He collapsed in bed and started up a game on his console to relax. Just as he finished up his first match, he heard his phone buzz at his side. He felt a similar buzz in his chest in the hope that it was you, but that didn’t last as the Google Photos notification appeared on his screen. His gaze hardened as he checked the date while the application loaded. Just as he suspected, an old anniversary date. He swiped the app closed before the photos of some long buried memory could load and force it all back to the surface. He tossed the phone away and started another match, a new frustrated indignation brewing in him and souring his abnormally good mood. He didn’t want to drink again- he couldn’t come into work and have you seeing him hungover again, but the urge was strong from the bottle beside him on the nightstand.

It wasn't until a quarter till 4am that it buzzed again, he paused the game and was ready to shut off the device when your name appeared on the screen. He instantly clicked it and was greeted with your familiar friendly tone in your texts.

Y/n:

You make it home safe?

Logan:

Yeah like thirty minutes ago. Do you really drive that slow, granny?

Y/n:

I live far away and it’s foggy on the highway… ac-tu-ally

Logan:

Whatever you need to tell yourself to rationalize it 😂

Glad you’re home safe. Get some rest lol

He couldn’t help the full laugh as you sent back an angry grandma gif in response, nor could he help the slight dread he felt afterward in response.

➢ Links:

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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

Note

Is there more to ☽✧ The Night Shift ✧☾? If so where can I read it?

Hi yes there is but i havent gotten it all written out yet! Im trying to update it but im a little stuck haha i will post more soon though! 🥰🥰🥰 -Ghostiewvlf

#TNS #the night shift #asks

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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

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Anyone down for some fucked up Obey Me fics? Downloaded the app 2 days ago and drained my checking account only to get to chaper 18 so im impatient and gonna write my own shit 🙃 - GhostieWvlf

#obey me #shall we date obey me #obey me luci x reader #ghostie howls

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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

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j can you please make a corpse x reader where they are both publicly dating and as all internet couples do, get a fair amount of hate. but one day a specific comment gets under the readers skin so they distance themselves from corpse (lots of angst but with a good ending ?)

I'm sorry this took forever, I couldn't get my meds and went a lil crazy agh, also idk if this is any good tbh I feel bad at writing lately. Hopefully you like it though oof.

-J The Ghost

死 Requests Masterpost 死 Request Topics 死 Submit A Request 死

Request: Hate Mail

You woke up from your nap to the sounds of several voices coming from the other room. He must be streaming… You thought groggily as you stretched and snuggled back into the covers enveloped in the scent of his cologne. You pulled out your phone and checked the time, almost four… Jesus, he really had made good on his word, you didn’t even realize you could be that exhausted. As you scrolled through your socials you saw the notifications of most of his friends live streams. Sussy Sundays, of course, how did you forget? He really had taken it out of you earlier.

You were grateful to have weekends off, allowing you to see him more than just any days you managed to get off work at a decent time, but you hated Sundays. You both took turns staying over at each other's houses and coming up with fun things to do together, but since he’d agreed to be a part of the Sussy Sundays, you had to find a way to entertain yourself. When he would stay at your house, it was easy to find things to do- dishes, laundry, and tidying up always needed done- but at his place, he mostly ordered takeout, and didn't really have enough stuff to ever accumulate messes, much less any laundry, so you were left to figure something else out.

A few times he’d asked you to join in on games, or hangout and watch him, but if the viewers got wind that you were with him- everyone's chat would latch on and start blowing up about it. You hated the fact that you’d turn viewers' attention away from the streamers they were watching, which led to you feeling guilty for making even the slightest sounds despite both him and his ever supportive friends trying to actively involve you.

Ever since the two of you had gone public, the internet had gone wild. In the beginning fans were pretty supportive and kind, but once Corpse started to post about you more and more, they quickly turned on you. It felt like the majority now was vehemently against the idea of your relationship. You knew that once it was public, you would get a lot of hate, but some of the comments were so hyper specific and vile- you couldn't help but be hurt. You always did your best to not read through them, or let him see when ones you did see affect you. You knew it was mostly young fans that were crushing on him and envious of you, but it all still seemed to leave you feeling drained, and anxious, an empty feeling of doom settling in with each critique. What if he saw merit in some of them? Sure most were shallow insults, but some seemed so spot on to you.

Who even are they? They're nobody, why is he with them??

He probably felt bad- he’s just too nice…

He can do soo much better…

You weren't usually an insecure person, but it was hard to stay positive when you did kind of agree. You worked a normal job, lived an average life, and you weren't really into the world of streaming, even as a viewer. It was- at the least- confusing to understand why he would be with you over someone with a similar lifestyle, or had more in common with him.

Tik Tok was your savior while he finished up with his friends. The algorithm only showed you the mind-numbing content you wanted to see, nothing about him or streaming at all. It was around 7:30 and you were halfway through a dinner recipe video when he finally entered his room again.

“Have a good nap?” He smirked tiredly as he plopped down on the bed beside you.

“So good…” You chuckled, saving the video before tossing your phone aside to snuggle up to him “How was the stream?”

“It was fun. Everyone said to tell you hi…” He wrapped his arm around you and absently traced his fingers along your arm.

“Tell them I say hi too.” You smiled as you buried your face into his hoodie. “Your friends are so nice…”

“Mhm… they really like you.” He chuckled. “Are you hungry yet? I'm starving…” You nodded and paused, still groggy from lying in bed.

“Can we get pasta? I’m craving it so bad…” Your voice perked up at the thought of the recipe video.

“Of course,” he laughed at your enthused voice, “you better start getting ready though…”

“Were going out?” You looked up at him in confusion, it was rare he ever wanted to go out, especially so spontaneously.

“Yeah why not? I mean… as long as you’re up for it?”

“Y-Yeah, just surprised that you are…” You beamed up at him before mustering the energy to get up and get ready. You pulled your hair aside and headed to the bathroom to wash your face, peeking slightly in the mirror's reflection and catching glimpses of him changing from the bedroom. The cheeky blush across your face turned quickly to a hot embarrassment as you watched the black button-down settle across his lean shoulders. Your mind started flashing through images of all the comments deeming you unworthy of him. You turned your face away from the mirror and avoided eye-contact with yourself- knowing it would only cement those thoughts and sour your mood even more.

You quickly brushed your teeth and headed back to the room, only to stare at the clothes you had brought in disappointment. Too loose you’ll look like a soggy cardboard box, too tight you’ll look like a shrink wrapped ham, too-

“You okay?” He chuckled from behind you as he fixed his shirt.

“Yeah… I’m fine.” You huffed out, grabbing at a random article of clothing and feeling yourself physically recoil at the thought of wearing it.

“You don’t look fine- if you don’t wanna go out we can stay in…” He shrugged and examined your clothes with you. “You still have some other things in my closet you know… you don’t have to keep living out of your carry on bag. You can keep things here.” He laughed softly.

“I- I know. I just… I don’t know- it's one of those days- you know?” You mustered up a small laugh. “Nothing feels right.” You shrugged it off.

“I get it… let's just stay in.” He sat beside your clothes on the bed, offering a soft smile as he took your hands and pulled you closer .

“No, I want to go out…” You furrowed your brow a bit, irritated that you were letting it all affect you so much. “I’ll hurry up.” You pulled another few items of clothing out and headed back to the bathroom, not wanting to even think about him watching you change right now.

You came back out after continuing to struggle through every aspect of getting ready while your mind attacked you. He sat up from scrolling his socials on the bed and quickly tucked his phone back into his pocket- a detail you wish your brain would find insignificant.

“Ready?” He smiled and stood as you nodded. He grabbed his jacket and threw it on as you grabbed your things and started to head out with him.

You were grateful for the comfortable silence as he drove to the restaurant, allowing you some time to try and change your mood. He’d put some softer lofi on the radio and let you silently watch as the streetlights flashed past your window. You weren't sure how he always seemed to know exactly what you needed, yet he always did.

When you arrived at the restaurant you were surprised to hear he’d made reservations for the two of you. You couldn’t help but smile, despite the discomfort welling up that he’d chosen something more fancy than you had expected- or dressed for.

“Wait, wait…” He hooked arm around your side, stopping you as you followed the host to the booth. He spun you into him in front of the elegant floor length mirror stood beside the entrance and pulled out his phone for a picture. You giggled at the quick cute gesture and posed with him, shutting your eyes as he snapped the pic to avoid any further mental spiraling.

Dinner went by uneventfully, you stayed a bit more quiet as he excitedly told you about new songs he was working on, or vented about the issues holding up his new merch drop. It wasn’t entirely due to your bad mood, you loved seeing him enthuse about his passions and how animated he’d suddenly become. His whiskey toned eyes would light up and his excitement was palpable in the air, making even you more energized. It wasn’t until halfway through or so when you came back from the bathroom that things shifted. You caught sight of him looking up at you returning before tucking his phone quickly away again.

“What’s that about?” You questioned lightheartedly with a laugh.

“Oh it’s nothing… Did you wanna get dessert?” He dismissed before swiftly changing the subject, but not before you caught a strange look on his face.

“Okay Mr. Secretive… um, I think I’m full though.” You shrugged awkwardly as you looked down at your plate.

“You sure weren't saying that about the wine though…” He chuckled as he sipped his own glass.

“I- okay?” You rebutted, hesitating as you gave him a confused glance. “I was just trying to cure my bad mood…” You internally cringed as your voice came out more defeated and offended than you intended, seemingly proving his point that you’d had too much. It was only two glasses… am I really that bad? All that stupid pasta I kept shoving in my fat mouth absorbed it all- I don’t even feel drunk…

“Wh- no… baby I- I was just making a joke… I didn’t mean anything by it-” His face softened with concern.

“No it’s fine… I probably have had too much- sorry.” You managed to squeak out, your face reddening with embarrassment. “Let’s just get the check…” I just want to go home now… Jesus Christ. You bit down on the inside of your lip as you heard the harsh, irritated sigh he let out.

---

The drive back from the restaurant was insufferable, just as it had been for him to the restaurant. He wasn’t sure if even his knives could’ve cut the tension radiating from the passenger side. It was clear something happened but he didn’t know what. Before he’d gone to his office to join the stream everything was fine, but once he came back the mood had completely changed.

“Are you- okay? Did I do something to upset you?” He asked as tentatively as he could upon getting back home.

“N-No, I’m fine. I’m sorry I had too much to drink.” Your voice was still soft but had a bit of an edge to it.

“I’m sorry I said that at the restaurant, I didn’t mean it like that at all. I meant it in like a- ‘it’s funny that you chose the wine over dessert…’ because I agreed- kind of way… I’m sorry baby.” He paused, taking your hands and tugging you gently closer as he kissed your forehead. “Y/n, If I did something to upset you, I wanna know, so I can fix it and make you feel better. You’ve seemed upset since I got off stream.”

“It… it’s fine, I’m just stupidly sensitive. I’m fine.” You ruined the entire night with him, great job. If he really wasn’t hiding anything on his phone earlier, he’ll surely start now. You huffed in frustration at yourself. “I should probably get home…”

“W- Why? You always leave Monday mornings…” He asked, feeling his energy plummet as you continued to shut down.

“I just have an early day tomorrow is all. I’m sorry…” You met his gaze, immediately wishing you hadn't as you offered a half smile to his heartbreakingly defeated expression. You pushed back the self-criticism as you went to collect your things, that could wait until you were alone in your car. He silently followed you back into his room like a kicked puppy and helped you gather your things, making your brain slew more insecurities about him wanting you gone. Once all your stuff was in your bag he walked you out to your car while you said your goodbyes.

“Please drive safe…”

He’ll just feel guilty if something happens…

“...text me when you get home…”

He feels like he has to say that… you’re so fucking sensitive. He walks on eggshells with you.

“I love you…”

No he doesn’t, why the fuck would he?

The drive back home continued that way as you dissociated the entire time, only letting the tears fall once you were back inside your own house. After having a small breakdown over the bullying your brain had done, you texted him you were home before collapsing down into your bed- exhausted by it all. You were ready for any solace you could get from mindlessly scrolling your phone, though it seemed the universe had something else in mind. You opened your instagram to check messages from your friends but were promptly bombarded by a photo he’d posted of the two of you from the restaurant. He’d put some goofy angel and devil emojis over your faces that you tried to let yourself laugh at but couldn't muster at the moment. He’d captioned it ‘LOMFL 😍🥵’ that got a small smile out of you, but not without a scoff. It wasn’t really until you tapped on the comments, you felt your gut tighten. The first few were various heart emojis from Rae, Tina, and Sean- but below that it took a turn. His fans attacked everything about you, your outfit, your weight, even your personality- as if they even knew you. But it didn’t stop there, some crazed fans had gone as far as finding you somehow- despite him never tagging you- and DMing your personal account even more vile things, even death threats. You wanted to vomit. You wanted to scream and show them how awful you could really be, but mostly you wanted to make yourself stop believing them. You didn’t want any of it to be true… but you were now convinced it was.

The next day you kept your phone completely off, even going as far as deleting all your socials before shutting it off. In the morning meeting with your boss you informed her your phone wasn’t working and email was how you should be contacted from now on, so you wouldn't even need it on for later. You went about your daily tasks at work completely numb, doing everything you could to keep yourself too busy to think. Of course, that only worked at work, at home it was entirely different. The next few days turned to weeks as you cleaned like you never had before, you rearranged furniture like you were suddenly trying to fit four Alaskan king sized beds in your home, you went to the store and meal prepped- full well knowing you’d have no appetite, you binged several of your favorite shows entirely.

By the third week, you’d fully run out of tasks to keep the thoughts and anxiety at bay. You scrolled through Netflix, Hulu, and Amazon- finding nothing. Out of either habit or some subconscious cue about the anxiety of not texting the only person you wanted to at the moment, you opened up Youtube. You rolled your eyes and groaned softly but scrolled through the videos anyway, cringing as the recommendations of Sussy Sundays and various other videos with your boyfriend popped up. You felt incredibly guilty about not talking to him. It wasn’t like the two of you talked non-stop, or that he’d be mad, you were just sure with the way you’d left things he was likely worrying about you by now. As you continued to scroll you saw a live video pop up in your suggestions, of him. He’s live? Why is he live? He doesn’t stream anymore… You were already anxious, but after reading the title ‘we need to talk…’ you started to feel sick. You hesitantly clicked the video and his voice rang out from your TV.

“...I really don’t give a fuck how you guys feel or what you fuckin think…” He paused, presumably reading the chat. “I know it’s not all of you… but those of you that are commenting this shit… I don’t wanna fuckin see it- I don’t everr wanna see this shit again… if you like my content but come into my chat, or friends chats, or on twitter.com or instagram and say that shit… fucking unsubscribe right now, fuck you. Get off the fucking internet, it's disgusting.” You took in a deep breath as anxiety welled up more, why was he doing this? “I’ll straight up never put out another thing ever again if this keeps happening. I know that people are always gonna be assholes, but if you’re a fan of me or whatever- and saying this fucking shit about my partner? Go fuck yourself. I don’t want your fucking support…”

You stared at his animated figure standing in the rain blankly and opened up your laptop, starting a video call to him. You waited for a while as he went silent on stream before it was denied. Is he mad at me? It’s all my fault- fuck.

“Anyways- I just thought I’d get on here and reprimand you fucks… and to all my actual fans, being kind and supportive, thank you, and keep reporting these people- love you guys… oodles and oodles… keep being you- I’m sorry you guys had to hear this… love you.”

You tried again as the stream ended. Again denied. Fuck he’s pissed… Because of me he had to get on after not streaming anymore and do that- fuck… You took a deep breath and tried to not overthink. Maybe he’s just sick of your bullshit. If he was worried or he’d been trying to contact you at all, he probably would’ve answered. You fidgeted nervously at the thought. I’ll just start a new show- keep my mind off this… You shut your laptop and dejectedly threw it aside on the couch before getting up and grabbing some blankets for another night of Netflix.

You were two episodes in when you decided to grab a snack but just as you paused the show and stood, there was a knock on the door. You looked over, and cautiously moved toward it. Peeking out the peephole you saw what looked like an outraged figure of your boyfriend standing outside. You felt icy panic run through you as you grabbed the handle and twisted, preparing yourself for the worst.

“You’re okay…” He sighed in relief as his whole body relaxed.

“I- Y- yeah… I- I’m fine.. What are you-” You tried to play catch up, still in shock to see him at your door, let alone not yelling at you.

“You haven’t answered your phone- for anyone- in like a month…” He seemed to pant out. “I tried to give you space and not worry too much when you weren't answering, but then you deleted your socials, and then didn’t answer Tina, or Rae… or me… I was… scared.” He paused and caught his breath. “When you video called me I panicked, I thought you were in trouble or- I- I don’t even know… I just rushed over.” He stepped in and yanked you into one of his enveloping bear hugs. You stood motionless, mostly from how tight his arms were around you, but partially from even more surprise. Here he was, yet again, proving that he knew you better than anyone- and certainly better than you knew him. The guilt of not talking to him only grew now. How could you have ever thought any awful things about the panic stricken, devoted, heart-of-fucking-gold man that was seemingly holding onto you for dear life?

“I- I’m sorry…” You squeaked out, faltering under his obvious concern. He sighed again and released his hold but kept his hands gently on your arms.

“Please don’t do that again… If you need space that's okay, but please just tell me… I- I didn’t know what to think- or do…” He knelt down to your level slightly, his face full of worry as he seemed to practically beg.

“I’m sorry…” You swallowed hard, feeling your face heat as your voice wavered.

“I-It’s okay… I- I’m not mad… I just wanted to know you’re safe- cause I worked myself into a panic not knowing- I’m sorry I just showed up out of the blue…” He took a deep breath. “If you still need space that's okay I just- I was really worried. I know I’m probably overreacting…”

“No… I just… I don’t know-” You looked down at your feet, the guilt consuming you now as he continued to prove every horrible thought you had about him wrong.

“Do you want to talk?” He questioned hesitantly as his mind began reeling in the same way yours had. You just nodded, looking up as he closed the door and looked back to you, eyes still full of worry.

You moved back to the couch and curled up into the blanket, comforting yourself and trying to hold back tears of guilt over how you’d acted toward him. He slowly moved to sit by you.

“What’s going on? A-are you upset with me?” He stuttered nervously, also anticipating the worst. You shook your head and shut your eyes as they welled up. It all felt so stupid now- but the constant harassment, death threats, and insults had done a number- and having him here, almost completely in the dark about it all but still so kind and loving was just too much all at once.

“Oh- baby… shh come here.” He soothed melodically as he pulled you closer, wrapping his arms around you tightly again. “Please talk to me.” His voice was soft and quiet as he pressed kisses onto the top of your head.

“I don’t wanna cry- it’s stupid…” You managed to mumble.

“It’s not stupid- something is really bothering you… is it the comments and shit?” You nodded.

“It’s all of it- I- I don’t know why you’re even with me…” Your voice cracked and broke.

“Y/n, I’m with you because I’m in love with you- I wouldn’t ever let the opinions of fucking dumbass ten-year-olds with no internet supervision change or dictate that…” You cringed as you heard the offended tone in his voice.

“I know… I just… I let my brain believe it all… and I feel shitty… and that just makes me wonder even more why- because I do shit like this- even though you’re nothing but amazing and loving to me…” You choked out between sobs.

“You’re not shitty…” His tone softened even more as he pulled your face up. “I have no idea what it’s like to go through that, and how you can even deal with it. Most people don’t. I knew it was hard to see, and if I had any idea that you’d been this upset about it for this long I would’ve stopped it right then and there…” He kissed your forehead and wiped off your tears. “I’m so sorry baby… I should’ve known.” You shook your head.

“I should’ve just told you… but I felt so stupid- letting it get to me- I wanted to just come home and clear my head and get over it… but then it got worse and I just I don’t know, I couldn't deal.” He pushed your hair from your face and let you continue after the sobs began to slow. “Now I just feel guilty and shitty for avoiding you- avoiding all of it, not telling you… especially when you are… like this- so nice, and understanding.” You scoffed harshly at yourself, making him chuckle.

“Don’t. It’s a pretty understandable way to react… I’m sorry honey…” He leaned in and kissed you softly. “Would it help if I pretend to be mad at you?” He joked lightly as you parted. You let out a weak but honest giggle and gave an exaggeratory nod. He laughed and tsked loudly. “I can’t believe it… how could someone so goddamn attractive, funny, kind, and lovable think that I’d be dumb enough to see any warrant to the words of fuckin dipshit kids? To think that I’m not already blindly and completely head over heels? I’m disappointed…” He mocked in a goofy tone.

“Shut up…” You laughed, wiping your face and pushing him playfully.

“I love you dummy.” He chuckled and kissed you again.

“I love you too, Corpsie.”

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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

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Wanderer: Chapter Forty Five

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➢ Summary:

Violet was a wanderer, always had been. In a near-constant state of uprooting her life whenever things got rough, she had seen her way in and out of nearly every major city she had any type of affinity for, constantly searching for a home she’d never known. She expected to move again soon, so when she found herself being offered a position to further grow her career in LA, the town she grew up in, it only made sense to accept. What she wasn’t expecting was rooming with a man she knew practically nothing about. They’re roommates for now, but how long will it last?

✧ Notes:

Hope you enjoy the series! Our requests are open! Links: Request Guidelines Submit A Request

Chapter Forty-Five: The Poet & The Crybaby

Friday

After not nearly enough sleep, Violet was greeting the marketing team as she sipped a bloody mary and waited for the Adderall to kick in. Everyone was relaxed and happily supportive of her work as she got to know everyone a bit, going into more detail about her travels and understanding of the digital realm as they discussed all the options on how to brand and promote her work. They were a good team, and she was excited to have them backing her. The only thing missing was Jack. The boy in the bar who’d been the first person she told about what she was writing in the first place. He’d always been so inquisitive and excited when she talked about it, and it wasn’t that her other friends didn’t care about or encourage her passions, it was just that he’d changed her perspective on the pertinence of her work… and now he wasn’t here.

She missed him. Much more than she expected to given the past few weeks. But she was used to people leaving, and she needed to keep moving forward, just as she always had. She was looking for genuine connection, and meeting these new people was just another step toward that. Even if it was just for work, it was a start.

Markus had told her about the company party a few weeks in advance. There was apparently a theme, fanfiction tropes. And of course they’d settled on Spring Break, meaning everyone would be in some form of swimsuit. Rolling her eyes at the additional trope she could add to her life, she was at least grateful to be able to prepare her social battery for the ridiculously long day of drinking and networking in a swimsuit. She’d even bought a new one for the event, and Markus had been annoyingly complimentary of the tall wedges she’d decided to wear with the mesh skirt tied around her hips. But as they parked and walked down the path toward the private beach, the amount of people already there had her heart racing. She had to remind herself that this wasn’t like the last few parties she’d been to, she had a fresh start with these people. And, if worse came to worse, she’d likely never have to see most of these people again. Even if it was for work, it was still spring break- she was supposed to party, forget the bad shit, and enjoy herself. That had honestly been the entire point of this visit; she needed to finally let herself relax.

>>From: Jack

Are you okay? Why didn’t you come home last night?

If you’re mad or something, I’m sorry. Idk what I did- I’m sure something stupid and out of line- but can you just let me know you’re alright? I’m worried

Confusion spread over Violet as she read Jack’s texts. She’d definitely told him beforehand about her trip- had given the dates and even times for her bus. She knew it had been a while, but for him to actually seem worried had her worried.

>>To: Jack

No need to worry, I’m fine, I’m in San Diego for the weekend remember? I’ll be back Sunday

Irritation pricked over her skin as a red exclamation point popped up over her message, unable to send. Huffing, she opened the Snapchat app to respond to him there, only to see that her responses from last night hadn’t even been sent. Regardless, she typed out her message, telling Jack not to worry, she was okay, and would be back in a couple days. Then she walked carefully down to the party with Markus and Anthony on each arm. With an edible kicking in and drinks awaiting her, she was more than ready to enjoy a day at the beach.

Her first drink was finished as she chatted with the marketing team again before someone named Robin introduced her to a few of the authors they worked with. It was easy chitchat, talking about inspiration and what platforms they were utilizing to publish and promote. It wasn’t as scary as Violet had thought it would be, but there was still something missing in their conversations that she couldn’t tell if it was due to where her head was at, or due to the professional situation- despite how casual the surroundings were.

Congratulatory shots were held at dusk in her honor. Markus had been taking pictures and excitedly adding to the company’s Snapchat and Instagram all evening while he dragged Violet to hang with some of his favorite coworkers, as well as authors they repped, and some of the managers they worked with.

“They can help with sponsorships, more networking, and even help you branch into other media if you want,” Markus explained to her.

“Yeah, that’s… mmm-we’ll see.” It wasn’t a bad idea, but Violet wasn’t keen on going mainstream just for the sake of it. It wasn’t that her work was niche by any means, she just preferred to work on her own time and not follow a list of boxes to maintain success; she’d had enough of that with the education system. Plus, there was a voice that sounded frustratingly like Jack that kept laughing at all their spiels.

She’d managed to find some alone time on the shoreline for a quick smoke at one point, needing a break from the extensive amount of people- especially Markus’ persistence in taking pictures and ‘interviewing’ her. The water was dark, the only light coming from the party about a quarter mile away, and the embers burning from her blunt. The ocean was pitch black, and the water cool on her toes- wedges ditched in favor of the sand.

The sound of the waves were as calming as the THC she inhaled, and as she blew out the smoke, memories of her childhood came with it. The calm ones at the beach where she could escape all the shit at home and actually be a kid. She was able to play and explore; be curious. It’s part of what had made that first date with Jack so wonderful- it had only added to the wonderful nostalgia she held for the beach, so having those memories be so synonymous made it difficult to ignore the issues she’d still have to face when she got home. Not just the fighting and leftover hurt, but the revelations she’d had since. She couldn’t keep living like this, she didn’t want him bleeding into every beautiful memory if all he intended to leave was a scorch mark.

“Hey, um… a certain husband of yours seems to be stalking my Insta…” Markus interrupted her thoughts.

“What?” She leaned over as her phone alerted her of a text from the devil himself, making her scoff. Of course she couldn’t get good enough reception to send a text, but could receive one.

>>From: “Jack”

Congrats on the book, glad to see you’re happy u earned it

…

not that you want my opinion on anything anymore lol

“Wait, is that from him?”

“Yeah…” Her brows furrowed at the snide tone in his text. “He’s been texting me all day, asking where I’ve been.”

“Well, guess he found you.”

“Yeah, and seems super fucking thrilled.” She scoffed again and rolled her eyes.

“Look, don’t let him mess this up for you. You did work hard on this and you have earned it. This whole weekend was to celebrate.” Pause. “I know you wanted him to be here, but you can deal with that later…. in whatever way you choose.” He gently took her phone. “But for now, have fun. Not only have you earned it, you need it.”

A few more drinks were had as Violet made her rounds, speaking with other authors and some of the editors and whomever had helped in the slightest and pretending like none of this was fazing her. And after a few more shots, she’d been pulled to dance with Anthony and a few others as the hours passed on, helping her enjoy herself and forget about everything she couldn’t control.

It was anyone’s guess what time it actually was when Anthony finally corralled his husband and friend back into the car- Violet huddled in what was likely one of Jack’s hoodies she’d tucked away in her suitcase. She was too fucked up to be completely put off by the way it smelled like him, too nostalgic and caught up in the ‘what if’s’ and ‘could’ve beens’ to hate him the way she wanted to. No matter how much she tried to stop herself from loving the ones who’d never reciprocate, in the end- she loved who she loved.

“Hey, put on a record while I roll.” Anthony told her when they got back to their house. Markus was busy heating up some munchies for all of them as Violet meandered over to their collection. She sighed when she saw a familiar purple cover, but slipped the vinyl out regardless and placed it on the jockey. Instrumentals filled the room as Markus brought over the snacks and some glasses of wine as they headed out to the deck, music still crooning through the open patio doors.

Violet drunkenly voiced her appreciation for her friends for hosting her and for all their support, and then they moved on to talk about Anthony’s latest work as a journalist, and then the topic shifted to music, which Violet wasn’t too keen on now that she knew so much more about her roommate’s career.

“I thought we were celebrating.” Markus blurted at one point, listening into the soundtrack still playing.

“We are?” Violet arched a brow in confusion as she grooved to the music, having ditched the hoodie after warming up from the alcohol.

“Then why’re we listening to your comfort soundtrack?” He sent a suspicious smirk toward his friend, who only blushed. “It couldn’t be… because of the dedication… could it?”

“Oh my God, shut up.” She laughed.

“Not like it would bring back… memories of a certain someone.” Anthony giggled at his husband’s sarcastic antics. “What do you call him again?” Markus slowly brought his camera up to record how much fun she was finally having.

“...loverboy.” She murmured, remembering how shocked she’d been at how easy he’d lifted her- how she could never quite figure him out, but still loved him regardless of all that, even then. And she probably always would, no matter what happened next. As exhausting it all was, as much as it hurt, she didn’t think she could stop. While she’d left bits of her heart in all the places she’d wandered, she always held a spot in her heart for the people she met along the way. It was a constant pattern, again and again she loved too hard.

“And if he still doesn’t answer?” The music, Markus, and Anthony all called out together, making her laugh again. She rolled her hips to the slow beat before laughing again at the feigned seriousness and her friends cheered her on.

“He better answer that…” Markus slurred as he took another drag. Violet was about to question him before Anthony asked her about something or other that took up the rest of her brain power before they all called it a night. When Violet plugged her dead phone into the charger, she was alerted of all the notifications from nearly every social platform she had- most from Jack. But as the sun started to rise, Violet’s eyes shut and she figured she’d deal with the aftermath when she woke up.

Jack woke up to a cat kneading biscuits on his back, cute as it was, he winced as the nails caught on his back and shirt. He turned a bit, Bingus immediately hopping off and moving to where Nugget was still curled up on the bed. He felt his face heat as he sat up, realizing that not only had he fallen asleep in her bed, but he’d had a death grip on one of her pillows all night. He looked around her room quickly as the anxiety quickly woke him up fully. Had she come home to find him here? Was she mad and moved to the couch for the night? He got out of her bed and switched off her TV, his neck and face heating more as he prepared to go out to the living room for yet another argument.

He stopped at the end of the hallway, staring at the couch, still left in the same condition as when he’d gone to her room for the night. He searched the rest of the apartment as his anxiety grew.

“Violet? You home?” He called out tentatively, receiving no answer. He pulled his phone out and seeing it was already nearing 3PM, he blamed the good night sleep on the perfume that covered the bed- and now his clothes- as he checked for any new messages or calls. Nothing. He started typing as worst case scenarios plagued his thoughts. What if something happened? Is she okay? What if something happened on the bus, or the train? If someone even dared to hurt her- He sent the message as panic and protective rage flooded his chest.

>>To: “Mommy uwu 👉👈”

“Are you okay? Why didn’t you come home last night??”

He sat on the couch, switching the TV on to try and fill the deafening silence in the apartment as he waited for a response. His knee bounced wildly as he tried to keep his thoughts quiet, focusing as much as he could on the show that played. Over the next hour, his eyes continued to dart to his phone every few minutes to see if she’d replied. Still nothing… He couldn’t do this all day… He got up and paced for a bit before opening Snapchat again. She’d again- opened it and not replied. It was so unlike her to leave him on read like this. Even when they’d been in arguments, she would be short with him but would always, at the very least, let him know she was okay. He huffed out an anxious breath and sat again, pulling out a tray and rolling a few blunts to calm his nerves. He grabbed one and headed out to the patio, trying not to think of all the times over the last few months they’d smoked together- all the fun he always had when he was around her, sober or not.

He sat on the couch by the firepit and lit the blunt, hitting it a bit hard for having just woken up, but needing the wave of relaxation more than ever. If something happened to her… No, he couldn’t go down that route of panic… he’d rather believe that she was just pissed at him and stayed at a hotel or a coworkers’ house for the night, then think about anyone daring to hurt her.

>>To: “Mommy uwu 👉👈”

“If you’re mad or something, I’m sorry. Idk what I did- I’m sure something stupid and out of line- but can you just let me know you’re alright? I’m worried…”

His stomach churned as he sent the message and tried to keep his thoughts in line, THC already helping a bit while he finished the blunt. The cats greeted him happily as he entered the house again, earning only a halfhearted chuckle from him as he made his way back to her room to grab his drink from the night before.

The amount of liquid that still remained in the cup surprised him a bit when he jostled the tumbler. He turned to leave her room but stopped as a familiar piece of clothing caught his eye, a smile forced its way to his face as he picked up the hoodie he’d lent her at the party, now carefully draped over her chair. His mind started to wander before he felt a buzz in his pocket. He would’ve been embarrassed by how much his heart rate spiked as he -much too quickly- yanked his phone out,but he was far too worried to care. He watched as her little avatar and typing bubble popped up on Snapchat for a few seconds before disappearing. Thank God, at least she’s alright.

He stared blankly at the screen and waited for a few minutes before trying to make sense of her leaving him on read. Was she really just ignoring him? He couldn’t think of any reason for why she would ignore him now; sure he’d fucked things up between them, he’d said a lot of stupid things, done stupid shit that pissed her off… she had plenty of valid reasons she could cite for not answering, he just couldn’t understand why now. Things had felt like they were- maybe getting better between them… what had changed? He felt the frustration rise as he started to type again in the chat.

“I get it if you’re mad… I suppose I’ve been a *proper* dick a lot recently… I’m sorry”

He chewed the inside of his lip anxiously as he continued to type a second message.

“Honestly, I’d really like to try and talk this out and fix this… I think things got out of hand and talking while hungover was kind of stupid on my part… 😬”

He didn’t want to bombard her with messages and upset her more, but he still wanted to say something to try and mend what he could for now.

“I fucking haaate all our miscommunication 🙃😥💀 why can’t we just fuckin communicate telepathically already?? 🙄🤣”

A bit iffie He thought, hoping she’d find the joke endearing, but fuck- he missed her.

“UGH… Boys, what do I do?” The loud sentiment startled both the felines as they were trying to settle back in on her bed. He smiled and carefully aimed his phone at the cats, catching a video of Nugget smacking the top of Bingus’s head for taking too long to settle in beside him. He snickered as he watched the replay before sending it to her. He turned to her desk and saw her vase of flowers, smiling as he plucked a small one out and- as gently as he could- placed it on Nugget’s teenie little head without disturbing him. He took another quick photo and added a very uwu filter, attaching it to a text to her this time.

>>To: “Mommy uwu 👉👈”

*IMG Attachment*

“We like flowers, and we like you. Come homeeee 🌸❤️🏡😿😢”

He huffed a bit and grabbed his cup again, heading to the kitchen and topping it back off before adding some ice and taking a long drink, settling back in on her bed again. He switched on a mind numbing show to pass the time as he waited.

---

He was a few episodes, along with another few drinks, in when he took a break to smoke again. He stood, chuckling to himself as he stumbled a bit, the effects of the alcohol became more apparent on his feet. The walk back out to the patio was blurred a bit while he moved.

He watched the smoke from the blunt swirl above him as his mind wandered back to their nights drinking together. He couldn’t get the adorable face she’d always tried to hide as she laughed at his drunken stumbling out of his head. Fuck why isn’t she here? I wish she’d hurry back. Part of him knew it wasn’t a good idea to drunk text her, but his phone was already back in his hand and he was typing out a message. He couldn’t help laughing to himself as he typed out the @ as if it were on Twitter.

>>To: “Mommy uwu 👉👈”

“@corpse_wifeie We’re coparents you know, you gotta come baaack :)”

“Deadass bitch, i fucmkin miss you. Fuckin come home”

“I’m sorry i not mean to call you bitch. Love u lots bye”

He headed back inside, feeling the beginnings of a mental spiral, but the liquor and weed numbed his inhibitions. He considered said inhibitions as he leaned over the counter, his finger hovered over the button as he rationalized quickly. At this point, he knew he wouldn't remember much of this later anyway, what was the harm? She was already mad. He pressed the call icon on her contact. No answer. As the voice message tone rang out, he quickly realized he hadn’t thought through what he would say to her, just that he just wanted to hear her voice.

“Ah fuck…” He chuckled softly, embarrassed by how disappointed he really was to not hear her voice. “Hi… um… sorry I- don’t really know why I called…” he paused, “I just- miss you I guess.” He picked up the wine bottle, cursing as he realized it was empty. “Shit sorry- I have… a situation. I just ran out of wine. The boys and I, we were partying like boys do… and now it's all gone…” He slurred out before laughing, realizing he should clarify. “I- I’m kidding obviously I did- I did not give the cats wine…” He set the phone down and opened a few cabinets in search of more wine he might've put where he least expected, forgetting for a second that he was recording a message.

“Oh shit! Sorry!” His neck heated as he grabbed the phone again, giggling drunkenly. “I forgot I was recording aghhh- God it’s only fucking 7PM.” He paused, taking in how hammered he actually was as his chest started to ache. “Fuck… I really wish you were here.” He chuckled somberly. “I really hate alcohol sometimes…” He paused again as the drinks clouded his mind with exactly what he was trying to forget. “I-I fuckin hate not talking to you… if you’re like- ignoring me on purpose to get me to act like an idiot like this on purpose… then congrats.” He chuckled again as he slurred heavily. “We… I-I promise I’ll fix this. We’ll be all golden again soon baby- Fuck… do you think they have glitter band-aid this big-?” The recording ended and sent over to her once he lost focus and opened the Chrome app. He swayed a bit as he stood, scouring the internet for a giant sized glitter band-aid.

He wasn't sure how long it had been when his search was interrupted by a Discord call from Emma. He stared for a minute, making sure to press accept on the call button and not video call.

“Corpse, my beloved.” Her voice was mockingly sweet as she laughed. “What are you up to bestie?”

“Mmm-” He hummed softly as he tried to switch to the Discord app on his phone, eventually getting there and seeing her video on the bottom window of the chat, clicking absently and smiling mischievously at her computer screen. “Hello-hello. Um…” He cleared his throat and tried to sound as sober as he could. “Are you live?” He watched as she glanced suspiciously at her screen as if it were him.

“I am not… I just downloaded a new horror game and wanted to see if you were down to play.”

“Fuck… uh-” He laughed and he shut his eyes, trying to sober up a bit. “I can’t see so good right now…”

“Oh, is your eye bothering you? We don’t have to… I guess we can just chat-” She rolled her eyes and laughed.

“Mmm- mhm… yeah that's it…” He slurred sarcastically.

“Oh shit, are you… inebriated bestie?” She asked shiftily, squinting at the screen a bit.

“Aghhh… very much so-” He stifled his drunken giggle a bit, only slightly embarrassed at being called out so quickly.

“And you didn’t invite me? I’m offended! What, did you make another gay head-empty friend? Trying to fuckin’ replace me?!” She accused jokingly. The shocked smile on her face made him crack up again.

“I-I’m sorry… it- it won't happen again… I promise-” He played along. “I-I am out of wine though…” He trailed off.

“Oh, so you want me to just drop everything for you and bring more wine? Is that it?!” She shouted, laughing through the mock angry tone.

“Ye-yes?” He laughed as she rolled her eyes. “I-I mean I’m not pickyyy, I’ll take whatever?” Another Discord chime rangout as someone else joined the call. His screen split to three video windows, revealing Poki sitting similarly at her own computer as she excitedly greeted them both.

“I’m not interrupting anything right? Are you guys live?” She questioned cautiously.

“No, we’re just chatting about alcoholism,” Emma answered with a grin. “Corpsie here is sloshed and didn’t invite us.”

“I- have not had many sober thoughts this month… to.be.fair.” He retorted.

“Yeahhh… we may not have helped much with that.” Poki admitted warily.

“W-wait what?” He cluelessly stared at the screen, before remembering what was a month ago. “Ohhh- Yeah, fuck you guys.” He jabbed as seriously as he could muster before another drunken giggle escaped.

“Is she home?” Emma wondered. The only updates any of them had been given was that Violet now thought all of them hated her, and refused to talk any more on the subject.

“No she uh- she never came home last night sooo… you know… gotta stay as blackout as possible so I lose the ability to think.” He answered a bit too cheerily.

“Wait, is she ok?” They both wondered immediately.

“She left me on read after typing for a second on Snapchat- so I assume so… she fuckin better be, I won’t fuckin catch a case.” He muttered, a bit of anger rising up as he remembered what he did to the last guy to hurt her.

“That’s kinda weird…” Poki muttered, not knowing Violet well enough to make a full determination on what that might mean.

“So- slumber tea-party and Clue?” Emma piped in, placing her extended finger and thumb under her chin, an inquisitive look on her face that made them all laugh.

“Corpse? You down buddy? I don’t wanna drive over to find you already searching for clues in the toilet bowl…” Poki questioned, not knowing how drunk he already was.

“You think I could be drunk for a month straight if I was a bitch? Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to?” He asked, deepening his voice even more in his signature mock threatening tone before drunken giggles erupted out.

“Damn alright, someone’s on their bully shit tonight.”

“I meeaan… I didn’t join a voice chat with Corpse Husband and Emma Langavin and expect compliments and sweet nothings…” Poki laughed.

“God damn right…” He continued.

“We’ll be over soon-” Emma spoke between laughs, “-remember there's no clues in the bathroom bitch.” She added in a mockingly sweet tone as both girls exited the call.

-----

He’d sobered up far more than he’d liked to, his mental state worsening by the minute as he waited for them to arrive. He made his way into his room and hesitated over the tray on his desk before doing a few lines to keep himself awake. Just as he made his way back out he heard a knock at the door.

“Goddamn, did you fuckin walk here?” He quipped, earning an exaggerated eye roll from them both.

“I was looking for your favorite- damn,” Emma handed him a box with several bottles. “Try to do something nice for you and this is what I get? Bitch.”

“Aren't New Yorkers supposed to be like… always in a rush or something-? Did you forget to yell ‘I’m walkin’ here’ or something?” He laughed as he mocked her accent, knowing the ‘mix up’ would piss her off. “Also, what was it you said, Poki? You guys weren't much help with the Violet thing?”

“First off- go fuck yaself, second-you try finding a good Uber in LA on a Friday night and get back to me.”

“Well, fwortunately as per both your idea, and requwest- all I can do is fuck myself.” He continued to mock her, shutting the door behind them and setting the box on the counter.

“We're here to fix it though!” Poki peeped out guiltily, laughing at Emma’s outraged expression as she moved to wail on their mouthy friend. She grabbed a few cups for them from the cupboard. And once they all had their drinks and moved to the couch, Poki started an order for food as Emma requested the tea.

“Look, no offense but I’m too drunk and tired to keep repeating all the details, umm…” he paused for a second, “-hang on…” Jack chuckled as he stood and headed to his room. Emma stared after him in confusion for a second before realizing and glancing over to Poki. She decided she was distracted enough with the food order and stood to follow after him.

“You’re not gonna share?” She admonished quietly, catching him in the act.

“Wh-?” He tried to cough as quietly as he could, given the shock of her following him. “I- I mean, Poki wouldn’t exactly approve of this…” He whispered back, receiving an eye roll and an all too familiar look from her that easily translated into ‘you’re a bitch’ as she leaned down over the tray.

“Where’d you guys go?” Poki asked, confused.

“I had to grab my phone- I uh, can't remember all the drunk texts…” He lied convincingly with a half guilty smile. “Emma followed because she's a little bitch.” They settled in again before Jack started to explain. “So basically- Violet misconstrued everything I said and thinks this entire thing was some sort of elaborate joke and that we hate her.”

“How does that get misconstrued?” Poki questioned, floored at the result.

“Honestly, if she was pissed about it why didn’t you just grow a fuckin’ pair for once and admit it?” Emma added.

“Aye… listen- what's done is done. I say stupid shit when I’m with her, but also I guess she fuckin thinks I do things just to ‘get a reaction’ out of her?” He rolled his eyes. “I thought things were getting better though, like- right after it all I thought things would be like… over, but- thankfully- she didn’t outright leave and after a few weeks it seemed like things were going back to normal-ish.” He huffed softly, the worry sinking in again. “Now- she’s uh… she’s fuckin gone.”

“All her shit is still here though right? And obviously she left the cats…” Emma remarked as Nugget purred loudly from Poki’s lap. She stood and walked over to the edge of Violet’s room, peeking in.

“Ye-yeah… so I was worried something happened until I saw her open up the Snapchat and not reply…” Jack took a sip of his drink, ignoring Emma’s nosyness.

“Does she normally ignore you when she’s upset?” Poki asked, a bit more concern in her voice.

“No, she’ll be short but she’ll always let me know she’s safe or what she’s doing so I don’t worry…”

“Guys,” Emma called out now from the back of Violet’s room. “Come here!” They gave each other a confused look before cautiously joining Emma in her room. “Unless Violet has the smallest wardrobe collection I’ve ever seen- then… I think she left…” Emma shot a nervous glance to Jack as she opened the mostly empty closet. Jack was quiet for a moment.

“Oh, so- just good news then?” He nodded and smiled, chuckling easily before turning around and grabbing something stronger from the box in the kitchen and making quick work of downing a fourth of it.

“Two things though!” Poki tried to remain positive. “First is the cat. Would she just leave him? Second- where would she go?”

“Hmm…” He coughed lightly as the liquid burned down his throat. “Probably to remind me of all the pussy I don’t get- and uh, I have no fuckin clue- if I did I’d be there by now.” He stated bitterly with a shrug.

“Have you shared locations?” Emma asked.

“No, it’s never really been an issue…”

“Lemme see your phone…” Poki requested after a moment of silence, eagerly grabbing it from Jack’s hand. They watched as she typed a bit before scrolling for a minute. “Found her…” She looked up and shot Jack an exasperated look, handing the phone back to him. “Do you really wanna know?” Her look softened a bit, making him hesitate for a second before taking the phone to look. Emma gave her an expectant look as she leaned closer to see the phone screen. “She's um- she’s tagged in a photo with some guy from yesterday… says they're in San Diego.”

“Um- what the fuck…” The mock threatening tone from before wasn’t so much mocking anymore as he took in the photo on his phone. Violet was posed a little too closely beside a man he’d never seen in pictures she’d shown him before. He clicked the username, taking him to the man's profile, Markus. His mind was completely blank as he raged silently. He immediately noticed the colorful outline of a story on the profile picture icon. His thumb hovered for a second before clicking it, revealing another photo of the two at dinner together, posted a few hours ago.

“Corpse?” Poki questioned, concerned about the blank stare on his face. She looked back down at the photo on his phone. “It could be nothing…” Jack silently backed out of the story and scrutinized the profile again. He clicked a link in the bio, leading him to an Instagram page for a publishing house where the same was listed within the bio as the social media director. He clicked the profile picture to watch the story posted there. Photos of food and drinks turned to scenery and tables and speakers being set up at some sort of beach venue. Jack’s brow furrowed at the next photo. Violet and Markus, the soon to be carcass, posed- his arm around her and both with big smiles in front of a display with a few dozen books on it. “‘Excited to welcome our newest writer to the club-’ His voice was vapid as he read the caption of the photo aloud to the girls. Another few photos appeared after with text thanking various people and companies for catering, hosting or providing Djs. The last thing to play on the story was a video panning across the spanse of people at a party, music played loudly as people dressed in swimsuits danced and drank at the venue, while people in the back were down in the sand or water behind. The camera turned to Violet and Markus, both also in swimsuits, cheersing happily and downing a shot.

“Cool..” He muttered quietly, heading back to the couch, visibly unaffected as he took a few large gulps of whiskey from the bottle. He sent her a quick message.

>>To: “V”

Congrats on the book, glad to see you’re happy u earned it

…

not that you want my opinion on anything anymore lol

Poki was the first to sit by him and break the silence.

“Corpse, this is good news- isn't it? She’s got a publishing deal! She didn’t leave you… she’s just out of town for this party.” Poki offered, sitting back down beside him. Emma wasn't far behind, setting his phone on the coffee table as she sat on the other side of him.

“Yeah bestie, there's no way- I know I don’t fuckin’ like- know her that well- but that cannot be her type…” She laughed. “If she has any interest in you, which- we’re not blind, we’ve seen the way she looks at you… we can all agree that she must, there's no way that you have anything to worry about with him.” He sighed dejectedly.

“Even if that’s true, she didn't tell me.” He took another deep breath. “Violet tells me everything… even if we are fighting. I’m her best friend after all…” He scoffed coldly. “Apparently I’ve even fucked that up now.” He took another long pull from the bottle, hoping to drown out the spiraling waves of thoughts stirring in his mind.

“Ok, don’t spiral yet, he could be anyone.” Poki tried to keep everyone calm.

“Anyone? He’s no one! Corpse, you don’t need to worry. You really think she’s interested in some random guy in San Diego?” Emma retorted.

“Exactly, we don’t have enough info to be downing things like that yet.” Poki quickly agreed, reaching to pull the bottle away from him.

“No, it's obvious- the feeling isn't mutual, and it never will be.” Jack stood suddenly, earning confused and uneasy looks from both Poki and Emma. A loud echoing clack made them both flinch as his phone clattered forcefully onto the coffee table. He took another long pull from the bottle in his hand, finishing it off as the video continued. He walked by the kitchen and tossed the empty bottle into the sink and headed into his room, gladly indulging in a few more lines before grabbing the blunts he’d rolled earlier. He returned to the living room and dropped the blunts on the coffee table, unphased by the looks of distress on his friends faces as he continued out to the patio. He collapsed into the couch there and switched on the fire pit, leaning forward and letting it light the blunt he held to his lips.

“Jack?” Emma’s voice sounded absolutely foreign as she used his real name, and a gentle tone. He slowly blew out the smoke.

“Yes?”

“You alright?” She sat on the couch opposite of him, her eyebrows pulled together in concern.

“Always.” He assured flatly. She sighed and lit her blunt from the fire pit as well, taking a hit and coughing a bit as she let it out.

“Corpse I really don’t think there was as much there as you’re letting yourself believe. I think it really is just a party.” Poki added as she joined them outside, setting his phone by him cautiously before sitting down.

“It really doesn’t fuckin matter. It’s clear that right now- I don’t even exist to her.” He took a long hit of the blunt, trying to force himself forget the video entirely.

“She’s just drunk, she's probably not checking her phone.” Emma offered back.

“It doesn’t matter.” He shook his head, chuckling a bit in disbelief. “She left without saying a fuckin’ thing to me, opened my messages- thought about replying but… decided it wasn’t worth the time or effort, and now she’s in San Diego- out drinking with a dude I’ve never heard her mention, celebrating something she never told me about, wearing only a fuckin’ bikini- in March- and of course all on a beach.” He took another hit, letting it slowly blow out as he spoke again. “I feel like it doesn’t get much clearer than that.” He callously surmised as the liquor he’d practically chugged started to overpower everything else.

“It’s really not clear though, it makes no sense…” Poki challenged.

“She’s made no sense the entire time I’ve known her.” He snapped, his words starting to slur a bit. “We’ve been fighting for weeks, a strong argument could be made that we never really stop fighting. She sleeps with me, tells me were best fucking friends while continuing to flirt with me and also shoot me down, gets pissed when she twists my words to be something they’re not, stonewalls me when I bring it up, then she fucks off without a word to San Diego and sends her new socialite fucking boytoy to rile me up.” He was seething as his mind continued spiraling. “I mean, we were never together, she made that exceptionally fucking clear, and she wanted to find someone she could ‘have connection with’ so I guess she’s gone and done just that.” He rolled his eyes and leaned back into the couch, taking another puff.

“I don’t think he posted that to specifically rile you up…” Emma argued. “I get what you’re saying, but I don’t know- I mean- say you’re right, say she did all of this with some malicious or careless intent. Say she is involved with that random guy- dating, fucking, whatever- why now, why him, and why ‘rile you up’?”

“I don’t know, to fuck me over? To ruin me? She knows she can, I mean she just fucking did.” His raw laugh let on to the complete breakdown he was holding back. “Maybe next she’ll tell that little social media rat that she lives with the infamous piece of shit, Corpse Husband…” His words slurred as he spoke, “...or maybe she’ll just… never fucking come back, she’ll send someone out to come get her things, never have to speak to me again.” He shrugged bleakly and chuckled.

“She wouldn’t do that Corpse, she’s not like that.” Poki chimed back in, worry thick in her voice.

“It makes sense… She can fuck her way to the top, once she gets done fucking him, she can turn around and fuck me, spill my secret to him… get back at me for making her life hell and ‘hating her’.” He spat out the last words bitterly. All his worst fears, all the worst case scenarios he’d thought of- they all were playing out now just as he imagined them- and all he could do was fucking laugh.

“What if, all of that is wrong. What if she just- really does genuinely believe that you hate her.” Poki offered softly.

“She knows I don’t.”

“How?”

“I wrote her a letter…” His voice softened as he took another hit, blowing out the smoke. “It was around Christmas time, and I wrote everything out.. all of it- that I fucking loved her, that she changed how I saw things and made shit just- better, that I wanted to be with her but would respect if she only wanted friendship- I added an apology at the end too for everything that happened recently. All I left out was the beginning. I put it in a pocket in a stuffed animal I got for her and gave it to her a while ago… it's not in her room anymore so she must’ve found it.” He shrugged, a blank expression on his face as he stared at the fire.

“Maybe she just- needs some time.” Emma countered, taking another hit.

“No, but does it really matter? What good is speculation when she’s out drunkenly trotting around with some other dude?” He laughed. “Not gonna change anything.” He paused and finished off the blunt, trying to expel any feelings he had as he blew the smoke out. “It’s uh- it's over…” He chuckled, his voice cracking slightly. There was a still silence as the girls processed everything.

“Corpse…” Poki started as he stood.

“Guys, it’s fine. If she wants to be with some fucking yuppie, go-getter- there’s not really fuck all I can do about it now.” He finished off his blunt and huffed out the last bit of smoke in defeat, biting down on the inside of his cheek to block out the emotions. He picked up his phone and chuckled to himself as he saw the multiple cracks across his screen. He stood and switched off the fire, grabbing the food along with his drink to head back in, the girls followed close behind.

“How can we cheer you up Corpse? Take your mind off it?” Poki offered, clapping and jumping to her feet comically as they refilled drinks and munched on the pizza.

“I’m fine- really…” He laughed at her sudden exertion of energy.

“No really- we gotta do something fun!” She pressed, doing a few strange mini jumping jacks.

“We could redye your hair! Get rid of shit that reminds you of her- plus that shit is so faded…” Emma laughed as she stood and picked at the random pieces of his hair that still held a light blue tint.

“I’m down…everything is in the cabinet in the bathroom. Do whatever, I just need another drink in my hand.” He chuckled softly.

“Oh my God! Okay, I’ll keep mixing more drinks for us all, Emma you start with his hair.” Poki’s voice pitched when she spoke. She excitedly beamed, handing him another drink as Emma brought out all the supplies.

“What color you feelin bestie? Or do you want a surprise?” Emma started parting his hair away from the colored chunks as Poki set all the drinks down by them and helped to section off areas of hair as best she could.

“Anything but goddamn purple and pink…” He laughed, taking a long sip of the perfectly strong drink.

---

“Imagine being dumb as fuck on instagramdotcom and only getting a 5k on this bullshit…” Jack held up his cracked phone, showing them a basic, thirst trap-esque photo Markus had posted recently as they helped style his hair. He laughed again, rolled his eyes. “Couldn’t be me.... Bet, fucking bet, I’ll post a picture of a strand of hair or my fuckin eye or something, and break Instagram and Twitter.” His friends laughed loudly, alcohol hitting them both as well.

“Be patient, Corpsie. You can be a manwhore on the internet when we’re fucking done.” Emma jabbed with an exaggerated southern Cali girl accent.

“The internet is the only place that appreciates it.” He laughed out drunkenly. “The internet, and my true love-” He grabbed an opened bottle of wine from the counter and kissed it. “Wine would never leave me. Right wine?” He turned the bottle as if it was talking back. ‘Right Corpse, I would never!’ He mocked in a strange voice and laughed. “Fuck I love you, wine…” He took a big pull, trying to not think about how easily I could say those words to -a bottle of fucking wine- but not to her..

“Done!” Poki stood back, and admired her work after styling Jack’s freshly dyed hair.

“Mmmm-” Emma hummed in concentration as she finished up. “If you’re gonna post your eye too let's really make it a thirst trap, you little weeb ass bitch. ” She laughed and pulled an eyeliner out of her bag.

“Are you gonna make me into an anime character?” He glanced up at them, trying to get a read on their drunk expressions. Emma concentrated as she swiped the liner on his eyes and backed up to where Poki stood, examining their work and grinning.

“Turn around and see.”

“Oh my fucking God… you’re fucking joking-” He laughed as he looked in the mirror. His hair now had deep blood red streaks where the blue once was, and Emma had used her eyeliner to draw two very distinctive wings at the edge and beneath his eye.

“Get it? Because you’ve been a fucking crybaby all goddamn night, you goddamn pussy…” Emma noted with a smirk. “Now work that Devilman side…”

“You fuckin’ bitch…” He laughed out drunkenly.

“Stop whining and drink more wine, oh my God.” Poki chirped in.

“Damn, don’t have to tell me twice.” He chuckled before taking a long swig of his wine bottle.

“Okay Corpse, follow through- break the internet now with your dumb eyeball and hair.” Emma reminded him with a light jab to his side and eye roll. Poki then helped take a picture of his eye, pulling some of the red streaks down and framing it just to show enough of the look but hide anything distinguishing with his face besides the eye and red and black curls.

“Ooh, wait roll your eyes!” Poki suggested before taking the shot and posting the photo for him.

---

The next few hours felt like a blur to him as ‘brown out Jack’ took over, snippets of watching as he easily trended on Twitter, bits of the show they’d put on as well as their drunken jokes in between flashed in his mind. After what felt both like minutes and hours, Emma announced that they should get going before Ubers would be too limited.

“You sure you’re gonna be alright Corpse?” Poki placed her hands on either side of Jack's face, forcing him to make eye contact.

“Ye-Yes Imane…” He slurred and chuckled uncomfortably.

“Okay, well- call us if not- or if something happens okay? Promise?” He agreed as he walked them both down to their Uber.

“And don’t fucking stalk those accounts all night and make yourself upset… Crybaby.” Emma smacked his arm affectionately.

“I’ll do my best…” He half smiled, anxiety already starting to rise as they said their goodbyes. “Um- thank you both… I uh- really appreciated everything tonight. I love you guys.” He choked up a bit, as he fought back his drunken emotions. They both noticed, hugging him that much tighter before getting into the impatient Uber and leaving.

Once he was back in the apartment alone, it wasn't long before his emotional walls quickly started to crumble down. He headed for his room, not even bothering with the lights before pulling his shirt off and changing into a pair of sweats. He leaned down over the tray on his desk and prepped another few lines- silently pleading for it to numb his mind as his hands shook.

Coping with a much larger few bumps was his only defense to mentally hold everything back. He let out a deep sigh and collapsed into his bed as the high rolled through him once again. Ignoring Emma’s sentiments was the next thing to crumble after his dignity. He opened up Instagram and looked through Violet’s tagged photos, seeing if anything new was added while his mind raced. I’m really not even worth a fucking goodbye? Nothing? Would she even fucking coming back??

There was a tick in his jaw as he opened the other profile, clicking yet another story that was added as he took a pull from the bottle he’d brought with him to bed. More videos played, loud music crackled even more through his broken phone as visuals of Violet dancing in the crowd or with others fogged his mind further, flashing memories of the last time he’d seen that much of her at once. The familiar ache grew as he watched, completely hypnotized by the way that she moved. He tried to keep his breath even as he reached down and started undoing his jeans. Party lights faded and flashed across her bare skin in the crowd. Her eyes locked with the camera for a second- coaxing out a sound only she could force from him. He groaned and opened Snapchat, and snapped a few dark pictures, writing whatever came to his mind before sending them to her.

Once he’d caught his breath, he opened up the story once again, instantly regretting it as he saw a new video was added. It started with shaky camera movements before it shifted focus from some grass and up to Violet in her bikini. Water beads were illuminated on her skin by a small fire from the patio a few feet away, leaving Jack to guess they were back at his place. He wasn't sure how to feel. The visuals made his mind fog up instantly all over again- but jealousy shot up through him at the thought of this shoddy socialite getting to be with her like this. Just as Jack’s blood began to boil- the camera moved closer as he heard presumably Markus’s voice shout a line to her that ran like ice through him.

‘And if he still doesn't answer?’

She turned, laughing and beamed drunkenly at him as she heard the music from her favorite movie start up. She rolled her body, dancing and singing along suggestively to the beginning of the song.

He couldn't even get through the video, he was up pacing the apartment, his phone to his ear as it rang. A small tone chimed out on his phone signaling to begin the recording on Violet’s voicemail. He couldn’t stop the inebriated rant that had been building this entire time.

“You went home with him?? Drunk?! Violet, if he fucking lays a hand on you, I just want you to know that I will make sure he never forgets what his own blood tastes like, his last fucking meal will be his own teeth. Remember that blind date of yours? Yeah, I'll start with something a lot worse than his eyes if he fucking hurts you.” He closed his eyes and tried to compose himself. “Come home. Now.” He growled into the phone, as his blood ran blindingly hot through his veins. He tried to calm down as he looked up, seeing his reflection in the bathroom mirror, feeling completely drained as lined up another bump and quickly snorted it. It hit him much harder than the rest and left his chest aching and head pounding. His eyes were bloodshot and dizzyingly dilated, blood slowly trickled down from his nose and his hands shook violently. He squeezed one into a fist, unsuccessfully trying to subdue the tremble. No wonder she fucking left, you’re fucking psychotic, an addict, you’re worth nothing to her- why would she owe you shit? All you do is fuck everything up- He shut his eyes, desperately fighting back against his own brain before screaming a slew of curses and sending his fist into the mirror. His stare was vacant and broken as he watched the shards scatter around him, barely noticing the several that shot out and embedded into his chest and hands. He screamed out a curse as his phone collided with the hardwood floor outside the bathroom.

He slowly slid down the wall in the bathroom and onto the floor, staring at the growing blots of burgundy spotting his skin now. He began carefully working out the shards from his skin, feeling all the edges of the glass tug and rip as he peeled each one out, unbothered by the pain each caused. Once he’d calmed down- as much as he could- he carefully stood and examined the rest of the glass wounds.

He let out a soft defeated groan and splashed water on his face before filling up a glass and downing it. He hoped it would get rid of the cough but as another fit started up he saw that wasn’t the case. He looked up and saw the blood still trickling from his nose, and upon looking down, noted the large splatters of blood painted in the inside of the sink. Why did she get to just torture him like this? If it hadn’t already been, it was clear of fucking day now. It was all just a game. He’d been stupid to even think she was interested from the start.

Fuck this- fuck what she thinks.

After picking up his smashed phone and taking a pull from an opened bottle in the kitchen, he sent her one last message.

>>To: “V”

If you haven’t read the letter yet- don’t even bother- just fucking toss it

After stealing the pink blanket from her room- earning him a slew of volatile insults his brain dished out at his expense, he collapsed in his bed. His mind easily drifted off in what would likely be the last time he’d enjoy the fog of her perfume.

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inciting-chaos-series · 2 years ago

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Wanderer: Chapter Forty Four

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Chapter Forty-Four: The Chaotic Weekend

Thursday

Jack was grateful that the alcohol had kept his mind off things for this long, but that could only last for so long. She should know by now. He knew based on her mellow tone when he’d asked where the band-aids were the other night she still hadn’t found out but surely she had to know by now? Had it been a mistake? Should he have just said it out loud instead? Would that have made it better or worse? The anxiety of it was eating away at him while he made another drink, trying to get back to a level where he wasn't fixating on it. He’d just need to wait until she got home to see if she even found it and knew or not. He took a large sip while he moved to the couch, putting on one of his friends' streams- hoping to further relax his racing thoughts as he waited for her.

After the stream was over and he’d downed another few drinks, he could finally feel the numbing effects. He checked his phone for the time as he got up- 7PM… weird, she should definitely be home by now… There were no new messages from her either. She usually would let him know at least if she was staying out, but maybe she had gotten really caught up with work?

He went to peek in her room through the slightly open door, smiling as he stepped in and saw the two cats curled up together on her bed.

“You guys miss her too huh?” He muttered, scratching both their heads as he sat on her bed. The cats both gave him tired expressions and stretched a bit, pawing at the blanket beneath them before relaxing back in their cuddle puddle. He chuckled, pulling his phone out snapping a photo of the two before putting a cutesy filter over it. He sent it to her and lied down with the cats. “Oh fuck I see why you guys are in here now…” He groaned out lazily as the smell of her perfume radiated from the blankets into his face.

He’d been some level of drunk for a few weeks and had no real sense of anything. He knew it wasn’t great to slip into benders again but it was the only relief he had over thoughts of how badly he’d fucked everything up. He knew he’d been a piece of shit, he had said shit that he never should have said. And with the way that things had ‘cleared up’ made him constantly question how skewed her perception of his feelings really was, and how that would affect them and his chances. He was pissed about it, pissed that she always found a way to twist up what he thought was clear communication. But he also couldn't help but feel guilty over it all. He wasn’t perfect, by any fucking means, he said shit he didn’t mean when he was drunk or upset, he did stupid petty shit sometimes, but was he cruel to her? Was he really so shitty that she could believe he hated her that easily? What had he done to make her think something so monumentally far from the truth?

He was even more frustrated because it always seemed like it was different with her, depending on the day. Some days he could get away with flirtations, and she would- seemingly- flirt black- happily… but other days, she would shut it down faster than it had started.

He stood and headed back to the kitchen for a refill before the smell of her fogged his head too much. He sipped his topped off drink and opened up Snapchat, brow furrowing as he saw that she’d opened his last one but never replied. He sent another snap, this time of the wine he’d picked up for her on the counter, writing out ‘got you your fave-it’s awaiting your return’ before sending it. He watched for a moment but she didn't open the message, sending a small wave of anxiety through him. Was she okay? Had something happened? He needed this drink to be much stronger. He shoved his phone in his pocket, hoping to keep his mind from panicking unnecessarily as he added in more straight liquor and headed back to her room.

“Are we just hanging out in here tonight lil man?” He asked as Nugget responded by rolling onto his back for belly rubs. “Solid logic my man, can’t argue with you there.” He laid down again, one hand still scratching him while the other held his drink. He closed his eyes and let the smell of her perfume- still draped over the bed like a pink cloud of- good- fill his nose as the spins started coming. Perfect, finally no more thoughts. “Where’d your fucking sibling go little dude?” He questioned as he sat up, to which the cat peered around until his eyes landed on the naked pink cat perched on the fuzzy cat bed atop her dresser. “Praise Bingus.” He saluted drunkenly, earning a soft meow from Nugget as he continued to pet him and wait, wondering how long she would even be, and if she would murder him if she came home to catch him in her bed.

God, if only... Having any type of acknowledgement from her would feel fucking divine at this point. It was like being edged for a fight. It was torture- and not the fun kind. “If we're gonna camp out here my man, we're gonna need to entertain ourselves, what do you think?” He just stared with empty, little, yellow demon eyes. “You're right. More wine.” He snapped and pointed in his direction before sitting up and taking another large sip of the wine and vodka mixture he’d made. “Oy, keep an eye out for me. If I spill this on her bed that will for sure ruin things for good… if I haven't already… aight? Can I trust you little man?” Again- blank stare. “I knew I could, dude, I’m just joshin ya. You really don't need to be so pressed about it.” He took another pull and set it down on her nightstand as he stood, mindlessly looking over the various items throughout her room. Her desk was pretty normal, a few pictures, some papers and planners that didn't get used past the month of February. He chuckled at her forgetfulness, opening a drawer just below and feeling his whole face go red. The drawer was filled to the brim with leather, lace and fishnet fabrics, a few handcuffs and cat ears. “Oh shit...” He muttered to himself. He’d already found her naughty drawer when they’d been in a phase of pranking each other, but this drawer? This drawer was a memory that needed to be processed later. He slammed it shut, feeling weirdly embarrassed.

He moved to continue snooping but paused. Not without a meme, maybe it'll make her laugh. Lighten the mood. He thought, taking out his phone and putting his hand on the drawer handle, barely pulling it open before taking a picture, typing a quick message with it and sending it.

>>To: “Mommy uwu 👉👈”

*IMG Attachment*

“Should I open it? 😇😅”

He sent the message as he grabbed his drink again, taking another sip. “Nugget, if you have some psychic connection to her… make her take that well and not get mad, aight big man?” He laughed as he continued to go through her things, only silently hoping to find more scandal. The rest of her room was pretty tame, much to his disappointment, though he paused and admired the “family” picture she had still from Christmas morning. He was surprised to see it so front and center, especially considering the recent tension.

He’d successfully wasted nearly the entire evening now in her room and she still wasn’t home. He pulled his phone out again and stared in irritation as the alcohol soured and shrouded his mood with gloom. She’s usually home by now. Where the fuck is she? He shamefully checked Snapchat again, seeing that she’d opened the first couple but not the last one. What the fuck? He knew things were still awkward but he was trying to make an effort, the least she could do is let him know she was okay and when she’d be home like she usually did. Was she mad? He hadn’t done anything to piss her off recently… He collapsed down on the bed by Nugget again and groaned as he drowsily flipped on her TV and put on a random show as both the cats moved to join him in his solitude.

----

Violet got on the greyhound bus in the early afternoon, her stuffed dino in her hands to keep her company during her travels. It wasn’t the ideal form of travel, but it wasn’t too long of a trip, and there were enough travel mandates in place that the bus wasn’t too crowded as she listened to every song her roommate had put on Spotify, despite having already memorized them in the few weeks since his latest release.

Markus, one of her closest friends since high school, was waiting to pick her up when she finally arrived in San Diego. It was through his publishing company that she was publishing her book; Markus was the social media director and was aiding Violet in the marketing process as she finished all the final details. While the majority of the weekend would be spent drinking and catching up on some much needed rest, she also had plans to get a bit of work done with Markus on that front.

“It’s been too long.” Markus crooned as he embraced Violet. “Can’t believe it took a book deal and a breakdown for you to finally come visit me.” She shot him an unamused look.

“I’m not the only one who’s been busy,” she reminded him with a soft smile as Markus took her bag and set it in the car for her.

“Yeah, I’ve actually been getting laid.” He snorted.

“Fuck off.” Violet responded in good humor as Markus pulled her into another half-hug.

“C’mere, Instagram needs to know about our reunion.” He pulled out his phone to first alert his partner, Anthony, that he’d picked Violet up, and then opened the camera app where he and Violet posed cutely as he snapped a few pictures to edit and upload later. “Now let’s go, you need tequila, and I need tea.”

“I think we may need more than this weekend for all that.” Markus was one of the few friends she had who actually kept in contact when they were apart, so he’d been kept in the loop about everything, from her moving to LA, to her job, and all the fluctuation with her roommate. It was hard to get it all out over text or even the phone, some things were just easier sorted out in person, and Violet was incredibly grateful to have some extra support and guidance from one of her oldest friends.

“Well, you’re welcome for as long as you want,” he assured her. “But I know you’d miss that rascal cat.” Violet chuckled. Almost on cue, Violet felt a soft buzzing in one of her pockets. She pulled out her phone to see a snap from Jack. Curiously, she opened it to see a picture of the cats curled up together on her bed with a very cute filter making the entire scene look absurdly sweet and tender. “Damn, you’re fucking whipped.”

“Fuck off.” She texted a reply of emojis-mostly heart eyes-and set her phone back in her bag in order to give her sole attention to catching up with her friend.

After setting her things at Markus’ place, they headed to a bar along the boardwalk and met up with Anthony for an early dinner, where they snacked on appetizers and sipped their cocktails as they caught up. While Markus made it abundantly obvious he wanted to talk more about Violet’s roommate situation, Anthony was good about keeping the conversation on work and the friends they’d made in the area. It kept Violet’s mind at ease from all the stress of the past few months. But then Markus insisted on celebratory shots, which made her nervous given the last time she’d indulged in this much alcohol.

“Markus, we have to meet with the marketing team tomorrow,” she told him, slurring just a little already. “I’m too old for this shit.”

“You’re not even fucking thirty,” Anthony insisted rather loudly, feeling drunkenly fragile at the ripe age of 34.

“Yeah Vi, lighten up. Everyone there is probably gonna be hungover or actively on something anyway.”

“C’mon, it’s spring break! Where’s the party bitch from our wedding?” It had been the last time she’d seen them in person, just before she’d gone to teach in Asia before the pandemic. Back when life felt more manageable. It wasn’t that it was easy for Violet before all that, but she’d certainly felt a lot more hopeful about life’s possible outcomes than she did now. Even with graduation and the publication coming out, she felt strangely fruitless concerning it- because what was the point? She had no idea where it would take her- if anywhere, and had no idea what she even wanted to do with all of it. No idea of what she wanted, period.

“C’mon bitch, we’re tryna celebrate you!” Markus insisted with a laugh. That at least got her to smile again.

“Sorry, I’m just being a sensitive bitch,” she waved them off. “Alright, let’s celebrate, but if I’m sick, you have no one to blame but yourselves.”

“No, that’ll be for tomorrow…. and Anthony will be our DD.” After the meeting with the team tomorrow, the publishing house was throwing a small party on a private beach. They’d invited a few authors for her to network with, and Markus knew from experience that it would last well into the night, with food, music, alcohol (and other substances) to keep everyone happy and conversational.

“Someone’s gotta keep an eye on you both, I know how you two are when you get together.” Most of the stories Violet and Markus had from high school and early college were filled with chaos and hilarity, and whenever they’d been able to meet up in between all the travel, work, and school, similar shenanigans could always be counted on. Even with all the growing up and separation, they always managed to work hard and party harder. And with a bit of work this weekend, the trio knew it would be just like old times.

They took the long way back to the couples’ condo, walking along the boardwalk and browsing through the tiny stalls and markets as Violet stared out at the roaring ocean, the tides almost glowing under the moonlight. Her mind kept drifting to her first ‘date’ with Jack, listening to him talk openly about his music, walking in easy silence, searching for shells… him kissing her like that. Then the fight, then hearing what he’d said to Seán; all of it was giving her whiplash, she really wasn’t sure what to believe at this point. The only constant had been distance, uncertainty, and the consideration that maybe this was just another thing not meant to end well; that this was just another test. She wasn’t sure what she was supposed to learn from this one; every time she had an idea, the only thing that came was more questions.

A low chirp sounded from her phone- another snap from Jack. Markus nearly slammed into her at the noise, tipsily giddy at what Violet’s roommate had sent her this time. It was a looping video of Jack showing off a new bottle of wine, captioned ‘got you your fave-it’s awaiting your return’, giving Violet even further whiplash. It was so simple but so thoughtful, leaving her trying to piece all his actions together, all the while drunkenly staring at the rings on his hands and the grip he had on the bottle.

“Hold up, excuse the fuck me?” Markus exclaimed loudly, taking her phone to examine the clip better. “This is your roommate?”

“Yeah?” Violet responded hesitantly. From the numbers on his Spotify, he was doing incredibly well, and she knew he was insistent on privacy. As much as she trusted Markus, she didn’t want to betray Jack’s trust about privacy.

“No…” The cheshire smile grew steadily on Markus’ face as the video continued to loop. He couldn’t help a near hysterical laugh that had nothing to do with how much he’d drunk that night, and the drinking he was about to do.

“What’s up?” Anthony approached them with the ice cream they’d decided to get on the way back. He peered over his husband’s shoulders and rolled his eyes. “Really? Again? I leave for two minutes….”

“What?” Violet scrunched her face.

“Markus has fallen down the Corpse Husband rabbit hole,” Anthony teased. “Fuckin simp.”

“I’m sorry, what?” Violet repeated, sobering up a bit.

“Oh!” Markus scoffed. “No need to worry, this is Violet’s roommate.” He sent a knowing glance to his husband.

“How the fuck-?” Violet gaped. “How do you know who that is from his hand?”

“Vi- that’s pretty much how he started trending. I’d recognize those hand freckles anywhere…” Markus told her flatly. He handed back her phone, taking in her bewildered expression. “Wait- did you not know?”

“I mean- all I know is he’s been doing well with his music. I’ve been listening, but he hasn’t really… said much about it.” She shrugged, unsure of what else to reveal.

“Ohhh boy, okay…” Markus rubbed the back of his neck.

“You can’t tell anyone!” She told them suddenly. “Like- no one.” She had no idea how far her roommate’s reach went, but if it was enough to be recognized by a short clip of just his hand…

“Cross my heart,” Markus promised seriously. “Deadass, I know I get mouthy when I’m drunk, but I promise… fuck, I swear on the s’mores.” Violet chuckled at the memory-their neighborhood in Brooklyn had three neighborhood cats that always stuck together, a beige tabby, a chocolate long-hair, and a white one, all affectionately called the s’mores by the neighbors. “Okay, let’s get back and uh, get you caught up.”

After trying to set up Youtube-and having to reboot the system a couple times due to the shoddy internet that Violet couldn’t connect to properly, the trio sat in near silence watching Youtube for the next few hours, only pausing for bathroom breaks or drink refills. They began with his channel, starting with his return to Youtube, and watching through various streams and unreleased music before going through clips on fan channels and then even delving into his friends’ channels.

“Wait, that’s Jacksepticeye?” She asked drunkenly when they got to Seán’s page.

“Yeah?” Markus asked curiously.

“I just… didn’t know that’s what he looked like.” She breathed out slowly as she felt dumber and dumber for not knowing so much.

“You’d think a digital media major would use social media more,” Anthony teased as they watched on, Violet carefully scanning for new information about Jack, whether it was nonchalant commentary or pertinent facts he’d either never thought to bring up or was keeping her in the dark about. As much as she didn’t want to keep overanalyzing, it was in her nature. She still couldn’t figure out why he’d bothered asking her to live with him, what reaction he and his friends apparently wanted, or if he actually gave a damn. While she was able to grasp so much more with this context, it still left her teetering on where she stood with him, if there was room for her in his drive for success and relevancy.

As much as she tried to grasp everything, she was still a bit drunk (and mildly disassociating as she analyzed each spoken word), so there were still some tidbits she missed here and there. She was vaguely aware of Ludwig talking about his Valentine’s date and someone else teasing Jack-Corpse-about his intolerance for dating, something she was very well aware of. She almost didn’t notice Markus pausing the video and staring at her expectantly.

“What?” She finally noticed.

“Didn’t you two go out on Valentine’s Day?” He asked. She nodded slowly and waited for him to rewind the video just a few seconds for her to hear Jack announce with a strangely sarcastic tone, ‘...have a date with my dream woman tonight…’ It had Markus turning back to her with an excited smile. “He’s talking about you!” As much as Violet wanted to believe it- seeing as how he seemed to be much more honest and open with these people, his tone still seemed too sarcastic for her to trust it completely.

“I- that’s a reach, Markus.” She rubbed her face tiredly. “Kinda sounds like he’s just fishing for views.”

“Yeah, cuz he totally needs to.” Markus rolled his eyes

“I don’t know…” Violet sighed. “Like I’d love to believe it, but…”

“Girl, look at Rae’s face! That is the face of someone that just heard tea get spilled that she’s been keeping quiet about! Even Tina did it, but she's covering his ass because Rae is such a bad fucking liar…”

“I dunno.” Violet repeated. She was exhausted and really had no idea what to make of Markus’ new perspective. And when she finally went to bed, her head was reeling with everything new she’d learned about Jack’s career, making sleep difficult. The only thing to finally lull her was the soft plush dinosaur that somehow smelled like him.

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