#i know i make typos a lot as well because i dont notice Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[mutsukiss]

I want to start this by saying this is COMPLETELY free of bad faith and I don't think less of any people that do this ok, I would just like to be explained what's up with people that regularly make gramatic errors like switching "their" and "they're". As in, I know there's young people, I know there's non native speakers, I know there's people with learning disabilities. That I completely understand and acknowledge. What confuses me is that I was also once 14 and learning English through the internet and had undiagnosed add that affected my studies, and I had typos ALL the time. But when I saw people writing it correctly or someone corrected me I stopped doing it and just. Wrote it correctly. Why do I keep seeing the same person writing "I love they're clothes" almost a year after meeting them

[n7punk]

Hey there! Good evenin!

I wanted to ask for advice on posting AI3 stories on here? I’ve noticed you and other artists I favorite doing it for some time but I’ve never really gotten the hang of figuring it out for myself.

(well, tumblr gave me two notifications but only showed me one anon so... hope you're the only one LOL). I assume that's a typo for AO3 and not the crime of AI generating 3 stories XD

okay, so I'm guessing you're looking for tips on how to effectively share fics in a useful/concise way? i don't know what a lot of other people do since the fanfic authors i follow on tumblr dont usually make share posts, but i can talk about my thought process i guess.

i share the way i do because i used to write my fics direct on tumblr (which was fine when they were like 1k one shots and doesn't work for pretty much anything else). i had to include all the information someone might want at the start of a post by necessity. when i started sharing fics from ao3, i continued providing the same information with some changes/additions because like, if that's what they wanted to know to read it on tumblr, they probably want it in order to click through to another site too. i know a lot of people who post direct on tumblr will just include like two lines like [- ship name - prompt/summary (some people skip even this & just. pls. include it) - read more] but that's really not enough for me to read something new unless i already like the author.

(side bar: for long projects, i generally do one share post at the beginning and one at the end, occasionally with another halfway through if it's especially long. i used to do them every chapter but that's just Annoying (for me, people in the tags, and my followers probably) but i update really frequently, so if it's been 2 months since the last chapter, go for a new share post, why not.)

anyway this is my general formatting notes that led to how i do my posts:

either start with or end with the link. you can type a regular title/"Read here on AO3!" and make it a hyperlink, or include one of the embedded links tumblr has.

IF YOU USE AN EMBED LINK: for multichapter fics, it will title it only as "Show Chapter" which is totally unhelpful. ao3 links are roughly formatted as "ao3.org/works/[workID]/chapters/[chapterID]". you need to delete the "/chapters/[chapterID]" part to have it display the embed link the same as it does with one shots, with the fic title, author pseud, and "AO3" stuff. This will make the link title actually helpful!

think of what information you would need if you were browsing ao3 instead of tumblr. you would usually be in a fandom, character, or ship's tag, so that's going to be the most important information you want to be sure you include and get out first, since it's often the first qualifying/disqualifying factor for people looking at fics. personally, i include fandom and ship because those two characters will be the obvious focus and all the others can be found on the actual ao3 post. if it's not a ship fic, then you can list major character(s) instead (also, you can list ship as "Gen" for general, non-shippy fic).

obviously you need a summary (seriously, you need a summary. even if it's bad, or one sentence, put something), but if there's other stats you want to include (like how i do the rating - which i think is important - and chapter/word count) you might want to put those ahead of the summary just to keep things visually neater. what you view as important will vary.

if you want to literally copy what i do i dont give 2 shits lmao. if you like some things about it but would change others, go for it. to me, your hitlist of information should be: fandom, ship/characters, work title, and fic summary. pseuds can be skipped, especially if its the same as your tumblr name, but i generally include it. i think rating is important, and i include something indicating length since thats a big decision factor in when/if i read what fics, but it's not so important in a share post because ideally, if they're interested in the summary, they'll at least open the fic and add it to their saved for later if its too long for that moment, and they'll see word count then

[whaledocboi]

i have been enabled and i also looove yapping so there goes the twilight doc rewrite idea dump (under the cut because this is gonna be long)

i will say it again tho, i only watched the movies so if something was different in the books and im wrong just ignore that please and thank you. also if i made any typos or forgot words ykwim

1, it should Not be set at a high school, i understand its for relatibility and so that they can stay at one place longer but i cannot believe that these people would actually pass as teenagers or that you are capable of making anyone over the (mental) age of 50 just go back to high school over and over again, they Would unionize after like the secone time. a university would make more sense because they can actually study what they want (or at least different things every time and it'd give them some sort characterization for once), there's more people, its less personal, they can blend in more so its not like outrageously unbelievable that Nobody noticed how strange the entire family is with just randomly disappearing for days etc etc, and probably most importantly we can get rid of that stupid ass teetering age gap between edward and bella, well she's 17 and he's technically over a 100 but it doesnt count because he doesnt age mentally- we all know not aging mentally isnt a thing, all that weird stuff, i dont want. make bella at least 21 or something. maybe she took several gap years because she wasnt sure what to do with her life, but after going on a spirit journey to working in retail for 3 years she discovered her unactualized passion for shakespeare or idfk, something of this nature (i do think bella should work in retail for some time, it'd give her the edge and common sense she didnt seem to have in the original). yea its less self insert YA romance but sacrifices must be made so i can get rid of the "not aging mentally thing" which (pisses me off) in this context is simply Not feasible.

2, we all know in canon all those vampire powers dont work on bella, edward cant read her thoughts, jane cant do the pain thing, etc etc, she has that shield going on for her, awesome, we can keep that, but i want to extend it to the point that all that vampire charm they're supposed to have, yknow that makes them "irresistable" for humans, just doesnt work on her either. she looks at the cullens and thinks damn. these people are uncanny valley as fuck tbh. and feels insane every time people talk about how cool and hot and sexy they are because i mean yeah i Guess they look attractive but why the fuck are they so pale that cant be normal and im like 60% sure their eyes change color. and nobody gets what she's talking about. she's pretty sure they're in a cult of some sort, especially after learning they're all adoptive siblings but they're also dating each other. she meets edward for the first time and him acting like a weirdo isnt softened by his supernatural charms so bella's first impression on him is like this guy is soo strange i hope i dont have to do group projects with him again. imo it'd be better (and way funnier) if she initially wasnt into them at all, it'd give moments to actually get to know these people and make the overall story not feel like she basically got manipulated into liking these people

3, going over to edward, he should be at least five times more pathetic, and also not a 100+ years old, him still being quite young would work better for this interpretation in my head. whole new backstory incoming, he was a sickly child and sickly teenager, spent a lot of time in the hospital or at home, so couldnt really make lasting friendships or socialize very much because of that, when he was turned at like 19-20, he had to spend the next however long in the vampire cult with the other weirdos and freaks vampires in alaska making sure he learns how to act like a human again and wont eat people and stuff and Then when he finally managed to get back into society he sort of realized that now people are only really into him because he has that vampire charm thing going for him, which he quickly grows to dislike, because now he'll always feel like people dont care about him for who he is but because of this unnatural allure he has. bro deep down just wants to make One friend who isnt there because of forced proximity or because of his involuntarily vampire rizz. thats why after he meets bella (and overcomes wanting to eat her, sure she can still have vampire cocaine blood, whatever) and realizes he cant read her thoughts and she appears to be utterly uninterested in him, he's almost happy because maybe that means he can cultivate a normal human relationship again. he lowkey isnt very good at it (aformentioned reasons), but eventually they get to a point where they are friends. cue to getting to know each other montage. they Will have more than 3 scenes together where they talk about themselves and their interests. edward would try to be as honest as possible because he already feels bad enough for knowing he could never tell bella about the vampire thing which is like. a pretty important plotpoint to him. (he'd talk about how he was in and out of hospitals a lot growing up which didnt help with his social skills, bella voice so you just stare off into space hoping your looks will be enough to get people to talk to you? edward voice well..so far it had worked...)

4, jacob should stay around 16-17 and he will stay good in this idc, there was literally no reason to ruin his character like that for the stupid ass love triangle. it can be implied he had a little crush on bella growing up, but imo by the edward events they should have a sibling bond where jacob still is protective of bella and isnt a fan of the cullens at all, but its because he's actually worried about her safety not because he's upset that she's hanging out with another guy. he would still antagonize edward but in the "your brother who hates your brooding emo boyfriend and thinks he's not good enough for you" way. and pleaseee give him an age appropriate love interest. dare i say im willing to put my own selfish reasons aside (lesbian), it can be leah clearwater too if done right (they both get hit with the wolfication beam and they're both struggling to come to terms with it so that gives them opportunity to bond etc etc. but they can just be friends too). i just think jacob could've been such a likeable character if they didnt insist on making him into a certified selfish niceguy douchebag

first movie more important events timeline: i manifest an imaginary small town and an imaginary university in the slightly bigger town close by -> bella moves to small town to her dad (i will make up a reason for that later. she wants to escape big cities, open a small bookstore and live near the forest. or something.) -> bella meeting new people and getting settled montage -> seeing the cullens around for the first time (#weird) -> meeting edward for the first time (super weird) -> edward apology, getting to know each other montage -> edward and bella are legit friends now and its cute! they bicker and stuff! -> something something different characters hanging out and we as the audience learn things about them so they arent just cardboard cutouts -> i think it can also focus a bit on edward's whole struggle with the vampire thing and the cullens very bad no good attempts at trying to act like normal people around bella after they all realize that they cant deceive her by just being sexy. let them be silly. bella genuinely likes edward and maybe alice (because she's nice and friendly) but still thinks their family is really weird -> the whole james feud happens at the end but its scaled down and bella still doesnt know about the vampire thing (because no matter how weird she finds them, her first and immediate conclusion isnt that its because they must be vampires, she's normal in this), so its just them hanging out/going home after bella dragged edward out to have drinks with her friends in an attempt to socialize him some more (insert edward slightly improved but still not great people skills) when they get attacked by james (just him this time) which immediately puts edward into the worst situation of his life because there is no way of getting out of this without either revealing himself to be decidedly not a human to bella or her getting killed by james, and in both cases its almost guaranteed that he will lose the only actual friend he's had since forever. theres almost no good choice because even if he saves bella at the very least he and his entire family are gonna have to move away and bella will forever have this experience and knowledge nobody's ever going to believe. its very hard to be him rn. he then of course decides to fight off james because the other choice is just letting bella die which he cant live with, so he'd rather choose making some shit up and having his entire family be very mad at him for having to move again (also just to note that bella really likes him at this point, maybe has a crush on him but isnt genuinely obsessed the way she was in canon, like she wouldnt fall into a multiple months long depression if he left, she'd just be confused and sad). story ends on a cliffhanger of edward killing james and after a moment of silence bella realizing what just happened. so unfortunately the gazebo dancing will be cut, rip.

the only thing i have planned out for the second part is that it'd start with like a small timejump where things seem fairly normal, and then it'd cut to a flashback of where the first one ended (the james feud) where now both of them are verging a mental breakdown, bella because she thinks she's either actually losing her mind right now or someone put the strongest hallucinogen drugs known to man into her drink or she did actually just witness his friend killing a dude in a clearly supernatural fight and edward because he has to somehow deal with this situation of explaining it to bella and making sure she wont tell it to anybody, explaining it to his family and making sure they (rosalie) dont get the sparkling idea of just killing off bella in order to stay around longer, but at least leaving everything and moving to the other side of the country. after the immediate freaking out bella is still very disturbed and shocked and quite frankly she does not want to be there so as edward would try to start explaining it she's like Please shut up this instant, there is no way i can deal with any of this at the moment i need to go home, can i go home? its not as though i can tell it to anyone without looking insane anyways. and edward is just very defeated okay but pleasee can we talk as soon as possible. so now its back to the beginning, its been idk a couple days, doesnt matter, and this will be the first time they'll talk since the events, bella is still lowkey spooked (no wonder) so her conditions are that its gotta be a very public place so she can have some sense of safety at least. something something edward vampire coming out scene, bella voice i cant help but feel like you're just shitting me edward voice i could show you all the things i've talked about if we werent in the school cafeteria- etc etc vampirism morality conversation no i dont eat people i never have etc etc edward will be allowed to have one vampire ability showcase running around in the woods and stuff. we can insert a cullen family argument about what they should do, but they decide on staying for now. bella is obviously still kinda weirded the fuck out and kinda wants some distance from edward to like figure it out, so she spends more time bonding with jacob who then gets hit with the wolf beam and becomes even more resentful towards the cullens (he blames the shapeshifter gene or whatever being triggered by them moving here and he's kinda justified in that) so girl is Not escaping the supernatural events, its almost funny. the victoria revenge tour thing will start in this one too. thats where im at currently.

extra thoughts, i would definitely want to keep the cartoonishly evil vaguely queer coded disney villain volturi the way they were in the movies, batshit insane michael sheen behaving like he just did crack cocaine every time he was on screen was the highlight of my days. plus charlie should also be immune to all vampire stuff thats why he isnt a fan of the cullens and edward either

i've never read the twilight books and only ever watched the movies kind of tipsy or actually drunk, but for some reason i got to the point where not only am i reasonably convinced i could make it into a way more compelling story but i have a fully planned out rewrite of the first movie/book in my head. maybe the second one too if i think about it for another hour

[shotorozu]

hellolololo!¡! so i recently saw this video where their

s/o goes on to omegle and the other person from omegle like goes “hi ur cute” or “u have snap?” and then their boyfriend just enters the frame,, can u do that to todobakudeku separately :3

if u dont understand u can check this out 😭 https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSJdEqc7V/ tyy ❤️❤️

“ur kinda cute” on omegle

(tiktok prank)

character(s) : todoroki shouto, bakugou katsuki, midoriya izuku (bnha)

part two — part three

legend : [Y/N = your name] they/them pronouns used, quirk not mentioned

headcanon type : fluff, crack — ‘x reader’

note(s) : i love these types of requests 🤩 so i plan on making 3 parts with this (oh and don’t worry, i’ll finish the other tiktok prank series i have going on at the moment)

also, there’s no proofread on this so if there’s any typos or mistakes, sorry! i’ll be editing them in the morning

┈ ✁✃✁✃✁✃✁✃✁ ┈

todoroki shouto

okay so, the entire tiktok idea was planned— but the part where shouto came in surely wasn’t staged

so, being a curious young person— you wanted to make a tiktok, where you went on omegle just to speak to people for fun

and inside of your head, you’re kinda thinking that “this is dumb, omg im going to get flashed on there.” also while you were setting up your laptop

but you just used the appropriate tags and !! you were set off for an adventure

you set your phone aside, and you filmed most of the experience— cutting out the not so interesting encounters out of your tiktok

and then came on a dude, who had a,, unique reaction. he didn’t seem all that fishy— until he asked you for your snap (your social medias, essentially)

“you’re kinda cute, y’know. how did i not see you before?”

you shake your head, “oh no no! i appreciate your compliment, but i’m very much taken!” your mind immediately flashing back to the image of your icyhot boyfriend

“nahh you’re lying! i don’t see any dude back there”

oh,, and that was because shouto was out getting snacks 🧎 “no really dude, i appreciate it! i’m very much taken and being disloyal is out of the question!”

this dude just kept insisting and insisting, and due to the struggle— you weren’t able to hear the door knob jiggle

it seemed to be that his advances came to an end, and your lover made an entrance— a mop of red and white peaked out from the door frame

and the dude literally got scared and ended the conversation 💀 because you really weren’t lying!

you also figured that it was time to end your omegle shenanigans, and finish the tiktok— because your boyfriend was already there “hi love, who were you talking to?”

you closed your laptop, and offered him a smile “i was on omegle for a tiktok! i’m glad you’re back.” you discard your phone, wrapping your arms around his torso (and also making sure you don’t delete the draft)

shouto doesn’t say a lot, but he immediately accepts your touch, setting the groceries aside.

he doesn’t question the fact that you were on omegle because well,, he had to get used to your shenanigans on tiktok SOMEHOW

a few hours later, you posted the tiktok— and almost immediately, the tiktok gains a lot of attention

“i love how your boyfriend drove the last dude away 💀💀” “man the last dude didn’t take the hint 🗿” “your boyfriend indirectly protected you! we need more guys like him.”

you snicker at the comments, which ultimately gathered shouto’s attention “what’s up, love?”

you show him the tiktok, “the tiktok did well.” he’ll comment calmly, but shouto’s lowkey MAD ?? that a dude had the audacity. but he’s just glad that you’re happy just maybe,, don’t go on omegle anymore 💀

“love— next time, let me in on your tiktoks.” he says, running a thumb along your cheek lightly. because he was actually quite entertained, putting everything aside

bakugou katsuki

as if bakugou katsuki would let you go on OMEGLE, a place that’s known for having the sketchiest people to ever exist— but make it virtual

but being with you made him realize that well,, if you want to do something, you’ll go through lengths just to do it.

even the great bakugou katsuki can’t really stop you. whatever makes you happy— but oh, that doesn’t mean he doesn’t highly discourage it

which lead you to go on omegle for a tiktok in the other room, while bakugou exercised in the very next room.

when you told him that you wanted to film a tiktok, bakugou only shrugged— “don’t do overly dumb shit.” was what he only told you and he left the door open too

you then set up your phone and laptop, applied the appropriate tags— and went off to make your tiktok

you only filmed the interesting encounters, and the people you met on there were very diverse in personality and just,, in general.

after the 4th encounter, then came a rather interesting dude. he didn’t seem all that ordinary but he wasn’t spectacular. he was just nice

and the conversation was rather normal— until he started asking for your socials “putting everything aside, do you have social media? you’re really cute.”

you reject immediately, “oh no, i appreciate your words but— i already have a boyfriend.”

you just have to hope that he noticed bakugou walking back and forth with equipment, but with his next words— that doesn’t seem to be the case

“i didn’t see anyone back there, a simple no would’ve been sufficient instead.” uh oh

“no really, i—” and before things escalated, katsuki’s head peaked through the door frame, freshly out of the shower “are you almost done, idiot?”

the dude literally looked behind you, and thought “oh shit, their boyfriend is bakugou fucking katsuki.” because bakugou is famous for,, multiple different reasons

the dude’s camera shakes in terror, “oh uhm,, it was nice meeting you!” not long before he dips from of the conversation, never to be seen again.

closing your laptop— you end the tiktok while bursting into laughter, and this action just confused katsuki ever further. he heard you speaking to someone, and when he looked, the person was nowhere to be seen

“what are you laughing at??”

“nothing katsuki, i was laughing at the tiktok i just made.”

then— you figured that it would be best to tell katsuki now that you were on omegle (long story short, he wasn’t pleased)

he scolded you that you shouldn’t be on omegle, but let’s be honest, he couldn’t stay mad at you— so he just cuddles the frustration away

when you upload the tiktok the following hours, it blows up pretty quickly—with comments like “LOL IS THAT BAKUGOU KATSUKI??” “he had guts until he saw bakugou katsuki 💀” “tbh i’d be scared too”

and when you report the news the katsuki, he smirks— “as he should be.”

midoriya izuku

at this point, izuku is very much used to your shenanigans on tiktok. he’s very supportive of whatever you do all in all

but, about omegle,,, yeah,, as much as he trusts you— he does not trust omegle. he’s aware that it’s a shady place, and he doesn’t advise that you do go on that website bc he cares

so when you brought up the tiktok idea, he proposed that he’d be there, right beside you just to monitor if anyone’s being weird :)

and that’s great! because you also wanted to ask if he wanted to be a reoccuring guest in your tiktok— and of course, what kind of boyfriend would he be if he opposed?

he helps you set up your laptop and phone— all of that sort of stuff, and then you guys were off to make an interesting tiktok

oh, but izuku did apply the appropriate tags because he didn’t want you to see odd things he was secretly nervous but,, you were very ethusiastic, so he was too.

the first several people were interesting in their own way— especially with their reactions to your boyfriend appearing on screen

usually, they’d back off with, and comment on how cute your boyfriend is— wishing the both of you well before calmly leaving to meet new people,

that was how it was, until you met this person in particular.

he sounded very,, egotistical— i wouldn’t say that because you’ve just met the dude, but he acted like everyone wanted him or it sounded like that

then he says, “you definitely have a phone number, right? you’re cute, just my type.” wkdksmd this is awkward since izuku’s right beside you, but he’s just outside of the frame

then, izuku pops out of the frame— in all his cute ass glory, he gives a small wave to the not so pleased stranger

“please, that’s your boyfriend?” he scoffs, “with those arms, he looks like he could be your little brother! now let me ask again—”

it’s really weird?? because have you seen izuku’s gainz?? and this dude’s audacity is extraordinary.

but little did this guy know, he’s looking at midoriya izuku— and,, you’ve seen his performance in the sports festival.

the dude takes another glance at your boyfriend, who’s sitting there right beside you— and he realizes who he was talking to

“oh shit, you’re—” and before the both of you could realize it, he nopes out of the conversation.

after that encounter, you burst into a fit of laughter— the look on izuku’s face being priceless. “you should’ve seen your reaction!”

“haha, i guess he knew who i was,” he says bashfully, cheeks warming up. because it registered in his mind that people actually knew who he was. “can you,, upload the tiktok later? i want to hug you— i mean! if that’s fine.”

of course it’s fine! you oblige, and give him all the hugs he could ever need

after cuddling with izuku, you do upload the tiktok— and an hour later, your tiktok notifications blow up

the tiktok all in all gathered 1M views, 780K likes, and over 1,500 comments— most of them saying stuff like

“your boyfriend’s reaction was so cute?? i know he looked like he was going to punch him through the screen but 👀” “last dude was just not it.” “LMAO HE REALLY TRIED IT” “is your boyfriend IZUKU MIDORIYA??”

when you excitingly showed him the tiktok’s results, he was certainly pleased— because most of the comments were positive, and also because the tiktok’s results made you happy

“i’m glad that it did well!” he’ll sigh in relief, pressing a kiss against your temple, let’s just not go on there ever again

┈ ✁✃✁✃✁✃✁✃✁ ┈

likes and reblogs are appreciated, thanks for reading!

i do not own bnha/mha and it’s characters. boku no hero academia/my hero academia belongs to horikoshi kohei, i only own the writing and i do not profit off of my hobby

do not plagiarize, reupload, translate, or use my works for audio readings without permission

[lucynnamonroll]

Selfship ramble under the cut, there is probably a lot of typo tbh

Last night I was thinking about Mucho (as usual i want to say snsjk) and how we met/cute things that happened before we got officially together.

Here's the situation: I rarely put makeup on, I think the last time I did was literally one year ago for my birthday, and it was my friends who did my make up 😭🤚

So what if, one day, I decide to put some makeup on (not heavy, really light makeup but it's still noticeable like you can see that something changed) as I have nothing to do but hangout with my bestie n Toman (i will talk about that another day). And ofc, me being me, I dont put makeup on just to put makeup on, I was kinda desperate to get some attention from my crush (aka Mucho). I'm not even subtil about the fact I have a big fat crush on him, and half on Toman probably already figured out but nobody really talked about it because well- If it's related to Mucho they dont want to take any risk.

The captains know tho, and they have so much fun with it 😔✌ They are not so secretly rooting for us because they think we would be a good match: the tall shy girl and the big beefy calm man.

So when I arrive where Toman usually reunite and that I spot all of them, I'm secretly hoping that he will say something about it, wasn't even excepting anything, maybe just a "you put on makeup?" would have been enough, but no, nothing and the others tried to push it like "omg you put makeup" "it looks good!" "Yes I agree, it surprisingly enough suits you" (<- draken or how to talk to woman). And he was just out there, staring at me blankly, with what I thought was disapproval in his eyes. (It's only later that i learned he was jealous about his friends comments about me)

Since I'm also very naive I thought that he just wouldn't like to voice it while others were around and just hoped that he would make comment later. Well, it never happened 💀

End of the day, I'm just sitting sadly on the stone stair, removing my makeup bc what was the point anyway, and I just look like an abandoned puppy and I can feel their looks on my back wondering what they should do because today mission is obviously a big fail. So they send Mucho over pretexting he is the one being good at reading others' emotions. And he has no other choice to do so because all of them are literally threatening him to comfort me.

The only thing he found to say was "Why are you removing your makeup? I thought you liked it"

"Well, not really. I'm not a huge fan of makeup anyway"

"Then why put it on in the first place?"

"To look pretty?"

Silence.

"What do you mean "look pretty"?"

"Well, I thought that if I put makeup, the guy I like would find me pretty, or at least say something about it"

Silence again.

"Well, if the guy you like needs you to put makeup to find you pretty, he isnt the right one"

( -> at this time, Mucho thought I had a crush on Draken, that's why he wasn,'t making any move, and even if I didnt get it, the way he said it was to make me understand HE was the right one 💀)

"And I don't know why you got this idea stuck in your head that you need makeup to look pretty. You already are."

And with that he left, because well, he didnt have anything more to say. He made his report to the guys that I was sad bc "my crush didnt made any comment about my makeup" and they collectively rolled eyes because he was probably the only one not knowing HE was the said crush.

Meanwhile, I'm dying in the background, squealing bc he said I was pretty and that means i can still hope for us to becone something <3

[violetnotez]

Hi! Ummm. I’ve had a bit of a difficult day. I was hanging out with my family friend’s daughter (7 y/o). Everything was going great, until she asked about my skin (I was in a bathing suit, so I showed more skin than usual). I have a really severe case of dermatillomania that’s affected me for around 5 years now, and it’s a huge source of embarrassment for me. I have trouble looking people in the eyes at times because of my face, and I don’t wear tank tops, because it shows off my shoulders (1/2)

As I said, I’m having a tough time coping, so I was wondering if maybe you could write something where Shinsou/Deku/Tama/Shouto’s s/o (pick your favs) has dermatillomania? And maybe Shiggy as well, but like, as an older brother?? I know he has it too, and it’s the first depiction I’ve seen of it in popular media, so he’s kinda special to me. 😌 Don’t feel like you have to, just looking for some support, and you’re such a wholesome person, so. 🙈 I love you so much!!! Many thanks - 📸 anon

Hey babe! Im so sorry your feeling under the weather, you are so so strong, really. Im really honored you came to me, and I tried to get this out as fast as I could! I tried to gear it to your situation, but also to anyone that has skin conditions that feel insecure about them <3 I hope these make you feel better!!!!!

(also i didnt proofread as well as I usually do, so sorry for typos!!!)

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ

Shinsou

If your ever feeling down, Shinsou’s the type of boyfriend to make cuddle you and make you giggle

And by giggle, make you so flustered you wont remember what you were even feeling down about

Lots of pet name- mostly “babe” and “kitten”, CAUSE CMON ITS CUTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

“Cmon kitten, can you give me a smile? Just one-you know how much I love them”

Once you tell him your feeling down about your skin, he is just gonna give you the most nonchalant smile as he cuddles your body into his chest

“I dont see anything wrong with your skin...honestly, I see everything right about it”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ

Deku

Okay-this baby, as smart as he is, didnt realize what your condition was at first

Honestly just thought it was your quirk

But once he realizes its an actual condition, that your insecure about, THIS BOY IS GONNA BE SOOOO SUPPORTIVE

Also is just going to be so empathetic towards you

“Gosh I didnt realize you were going through all that-your so amazingly strong, dont ever forget it!”

Will of course research it and take notes about it- anything revolving you he will immediately research it, hope you know that

He will pick up all your little mannerisms- if your hand are fidgeting, he will immediately hand you a little stress reliever ball to get ylur mind off of it or even do thing like play video games or do some training

In public if he notices you getting shy around others, he’ll give you an encouraging smile

“Here”- he will give you his hand, and then pull you closer to him so you know he is right there beside you

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ

Tamaki

As socially awkward as he is, he would HATE to see you uncomfortable in public

He understands the struggle you are going through, always feeling stressed out around others and if they are judging or staring, but he’ll try to help you overcome it as best he can

WHICH MEANSSSSSS TAMAKI CUDDDLESSSSSS

Honestly tho Tamaki cuddles are really just him hugging you really realllyyyyyy soft

This boy may be blushy but he will just shower you in affection and affirmations

“You know your beautiful, right?”

Just so so sooooooo incredibly sweet about all your insecurities

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ

Shoto

Shoto is NOT shallow-like at all

And by shallow I mean he isnt geared tawrds appearances-but character and perosnality

So when you tell him about your insecurities, hes immediately just so confused

“What do you mean you feel self-conscious? To me, you look absolutely fine,”

But he will understand how you feel once you explain it him- after all, he has his own skin issues too

In public he is just the sweetest little bean verrrrr

Like very protective and makes sure you feel safe

If he ver spots soemone staring at you/you feeling uncomfrotable, he’s immediately gonna kick into Protective Boyfriend Mode

Will grab your hand gently and pull you close to him, his walk going a little faster to get you out of the uncomfy situation

“Just follow me dear- youre going to be fine”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ

Bonus: Shiggy!

If anybody so much as gives you a wierd stare uhhhhhh

they dead

But honestly Shigaraki would probably be protective of you, like a little sister!

He gives good advice, that is just worded very very wrong

“The hell you worried about others opinions? Theyre all just little pieces of trash anyway”

SHiggy we get your angsty but you cant call society ALL trash some of us are decentttttttt

If you tell him about feeling insecure, he will instantly get defensive for you and creepy

“Huh. so somebody’s been bothering you? Oh dont worry, Ill take care of it-”

He is like a ticking time bomb with tooooo much power and time PLS CONTROL HIM

After he’s done making death threats, he will listen to your insecurities and honestly probably feel empathy for the first time in a while

He gets what your going through, and it pains him to see someone he actually cares for go through something that he is bothered with too

After your down spilling your emotions, he will give you a thoughtful look and the smallest grin

“Word of advice- people will judge you at some point, you cant control that. So control what you do and give them shit for ever thinking less of you.”

Very um-honest adivce!

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ

Again, I really hope this helped you some and Im sorry for this post being so late! I hope your feeling better babe! <3

[ayzashl]

Pairing: Shoto Todoroki x Reader

Genre: Fluff, Crack (i think)

Also um, im new to these so sorry for possible gramatical errors or typos (i dont double check bc I literally was bored doing this and just, decided to share it on tumblr lmao)

Disclaimer, I made this out of boredom because I was thinking about exams and stuff and was wondering about how my husbando would react about my situation, having placed on high ranks barely putting efforts towards studying lmao (Not rlly bragging im sorry if it came out as bragging :((, i jusy rlly be curious and hopefully I portrayed it like how I expected for him to react, sorry im new to writing bc I mainly draw🌚👉👈)

***

It was already sunset. The hues of yellow, orange and red envelops the dorms of U.A high school, its gradient tinting the windows of the students occupying the rooms shine bright, displaying its vibrant colors on the inside of each dorms facing the sunset.

You, who were sitting on your knees, switching positions time to time, searching for a particular pose to get comfortable while drawing on your boyfriend's kotatsu in his dorm, door leading into the balcony open, making the cold breeze of late October allow itself to enter the room.

Autumn has already arrived, and that also means midterm exams. It had just finished today. After a almost whole month of preparing for the exams, and the 3 days of taking it, the students of 1-A was relieved and relaxing in their rooms as the days of hardhips were finally over, plus its a Friday so the students were scattered on each others dorms due to the upcoming weekend.

You were taking a sip of your juicebox, almost emptying it now out of frustration for having a hard time drawing a hand. In your opinion, the struggle was equal or actually a lot harder than your midterms. Art frustrates you a lot and your boyfriend wonders why you still do it, yet never really ask you since he can also tell you're really passionate about it than your other hobbies.

He was sitting on his futon, leaning againts the wall as he stare at your back figure, watching you scribble something on your sketchpad and aggressively erasing it afterwards, making the papers crumble into the direction on where you rub it, making you groan in annoyance even more.

As he observes your actions, a thought runs up his mind, asking himself the same particular questions over and over again.

"Why?"

He asks himself. Why were you putting most of your effort into this drawing? Why were you more irritated in this than the midterm exams?

"Just..... why?"

Shoto had noticed you since the start of your so-called-library-dates, although its mostly just you accompanying him to gather resources for the upcoming exams while you just scan your notes or draw, or read a completely different book whose topic is not related to your exams.

Its always been like that everyday, he never really saw you offer a lot of your energy in terms of studying, like most of the students does, as he noticed the library being almost full as soon as October started.

He saw you scan your notes time to time, yes. But full on concentration on studies? no, never seen you. The most of what he saw were you fixate immensely on your math notebook before exams started, and that was it.

The exams ended abruptly on the second day but there was extra curricular on the Hero's Course on the third day before their final grade were posted. And yes, both of you did well. After the announcement, Shoto (and you) were shocked to find out that you were in 6th place and he placed in 5th. You both exchanged congratulations, you mostly squealing out of joy to actually achieve this particular rank.

Shoto on the other hand was, doubting?. Of course he feels happy for you, but at the back of his mind, he was a little agitated. You both got the exam results at the end of the third day and to his surprise (and also yours, but internally) your scores were high, almost having the amount of same mistakes as him, except your math which you devastatingly, almost failed (lmao), which merely affected your overall result since your scores were high anyways.

Your boyfriend wasnt the type to get irritated over these things, heck yeah he feels ecstatic over your accomplishment, signal the kiss he gave you on your forehead plus the soft look he gave you with a slight smile displayed on his face. But there was a faint thought of doubt running through the back of his head, how did you get such results when you were barely even studying? There was no way you would cheat right? He didnt want to accept it, he didnt want to doubt you, but it was the one of the highest possibilities that was mostly that likely happened, as he could think of right now.

He couldnt let go of this thought unless he confronts you about it right now, so he decided to ask you, waiting for a few moments, observing you, waiting for you to calm down a little from your work.

"Y/n...."

"Hmm?" you hum, not turning yout back at him, eyes and most of your attention fixated on the paper.

"How did you manage to get a high rank even though I barely saw you studying?" he finally asks, hoping you wont get offended by it, but this thought had been bothering him a little, and he wouldnt be satisfied until he gets his answer, as the stubborn man that he is.

"Are you doubting me?" you say in an offended tone, although you meant it sarcastically, turning your back, giving Shoto your full attention now as you crawl towards him, pencil dropping in the background as you make your way towards your boyfriend, offering him to lay down as you pat his futon. He complies so, already knowing you wanted to cuddle whenever you do that certain action.

You cuddle next to him, facing him as you give him a smile to reassure him that you werent offended by him back then. "Did you notice that in class, I always, almost bury my head on my notebook, writing on it almost 24/7 whenever lecture starts?" you ask him, as you start to fidget his hair on the sides which you and him really enjoy, making its way up to his bangs, and back and fort.

"You were.... writing?" Shoto asks, raising an eyebrow with the same stoic face who seemed not to show a lot of emotions, a little dumbfounded. "I thought you were doodling". You burst out in laughter from the small misunderstanding of your boyfriend.

"Of course I was. You see, whatever the teacher blurts about that sounds important to me, I write it down because, you know, its usually what appears in exams" you explain to him, closing your eyes time to time as if you were a philosopher, passionately explaining your beliefs, only with an added self-sense of humor. As he was on the other had was, fascinated.

I mean, who knew?

"Also just to clarify things, I do put some extra effort on, some of my studies"

"By some you mean just the science topic you reported you keep rereading everyday"

"......yes"

Shoto lighlty chuckles as he moves your head to his chest, placing an arm on your head, planting a kiss on your forehead, as a sign of affection like he always does. He feels a little guilty, assuming you were cheating but in the end, you were just and always has been the genius that you were. Heck if you actually put a lot of effort in your study, you might actually come out at the top in the class, but he's aware you have other things to focus and worry about as his eyes gaze at the table with a slightly crumpled juice box standing out.

"Were you mad?" you ask, out of curiousity. You had assumed he was maybe upset about the results because he gets a little too competitive or has the sentiment that he has to prove that he only isnt good with his powers, but in academics as well, considering his situation.

He lightly shook his head as he fully encloses you to his grasp, leg placed on your sides, locking you in as he settles his face on your hair, inhaling the sweet scent of your lavender shampoo in which he always adores.

You on the other hand, was relieved now that the matter was somehow resolved? Putting those thoughts at the back of your head, your perception of relief was shortly replaced by a wave of worry as you lightly chuckle of uneasiness.

"Shoto?" you tap his sides, body tightly secured onto his. This was the one that made worry. His hands tightly clutching you, but not too much, leg on your sides, locking you in so that you wont get away easily, to him it made him feel happy, knowing that you werent going away and draw for a while. You've had situations like these already and all you ever do is give up and shower him with affection, already knowing he was slightly, probably getting a little touch starved, craving for your attention and affection. But in your situation right now, it was, unpleasant, so to say.

Not after you just finished your juicebox.

-Disclaimer, uh, I made this from

He hums in response, head tilted a little more into your head's direction. He was sure you would have given up already, knowing that he will never let you go.

"I need to pee"

"..."

"Shoto..."

"........"

"Sho"

"All I can say is good luck getting out"

"......"

"Noooooooohohohoooo!!!" you exclaim, with a sarcastic crying in your tone. This was gonna be one hell of a struggle.

.

Im bad at explaining things, hope you did enjoy reading this as much as I did though :))

[louiserandom]

Play Games with Me

Pairing: Senju Tobirama/Uchiha Madara | Rating: E

A/N: Commission for the amazing @rookie-d​💙💗 thank you so much! *hugs* 

Read on AO3 or continue under the cut :3 Ko-fi and fic commission info in the header!

Tobirama SenJERK has never had sex in his life, Madara types, as always brimming with spite when it comes to his least favorite person in town. Maybe on the planet.

Rereading the comment and satisfied that there aren’t any typos or any hint whatsoever at some kind of hidden affection (which isn’t there, never was and never will be, Madara reminds himself firmly), he hits ‘Comment.’

“Take that, you dumbass,” Madara mutters under his breath, and really, this could be classified as childish, were he not completely in the right to take vicious revenge upon the fucking asshole who dared refer to Madara as ‘so idiotic it’s pitifully adorable’ on his last stream. Hah! Like Tobirama isn’t the less intelligent one of the two of them; Madara has watched enough of his Uncharted 4 gameplay to note that Tobirama took twelve seconds longer than him to figure out arguably the most difficult puzzle in the game. And although Madara’s sub count doesn’t quite reflect his superior intellect compared to Senju’sーnot that he’s checked in a whileーit’s likely a testament to the viewers’ total lack of taste, if anything else.

(Two thousand, nine hundred and thirty four viewer’s, to be precise, according to this morning’s stats and minus the handful of Madara’s fake accounts that he created just in case to keep up with his chief competitor. Admittedly, it might be a tad annoying.)

A notification pipes up.

Hm, I wonder how you’d know that, MaddyGamerboy? Are you stalking me? I must admit, I’m flattered.

Madara sputters at the reply. At yet another butchering of his perfectly adequate nickname. The fucking nerve of the guyーand people fucking wonder why Madara hates his guts?

(Madara knows it doesn’t really help his case that he’s touched himself to fantasies of the younger Senju more times than he’d care to count, but hate-fucking a thing isn’t it? Hate-masturbation must be too, he supposes. Not the healthiest outlet for negative feelings, but it makes him feel good enough.)

(Heavenly, to be precise.)

I AM NOT, YOU SELF-OBSESSED DUMBASS, Madara types, simultaneously taking care of the half-a-dozen typos that appear of their own accord.

No.

Deep breath. Stop fingers from shaking. Think about something witty to say.

Pff, he writes, for lack of any better word to express his indignant huff, like I give a shit about you. You’re dumb.

It did sound much better in his head, but Madara has spent over a minute writing the comment already, and he doesn’t want to appear as if he’s thinking too hard on it.

He posts his answer, not dwelling too match on the number of likes on Tobirama’s comment far outnumbering the hundred Madara’s garnered. Again, Tobirama’s audience is clearly not the best judge of character.

“FUCK. YOU. SIDEWAYS, SENJU!” Madara shouts at the reply that follows, consisting only of the words:

Thanks for the sub btw.

“You fucking piece of shit,” Madara hisses. “Like eight fucking fake accounts do anything to boost your stats, I don’t even like all your videos from each one of them, you ass!”

I DID NOT SUB DONT BELIEVE HIM

I’m happy to have another loyal fan ;)

HE IS FUCKING LYEING!!!

With seemingly every single person in the comments raving about how it’s about time MadGamer69 and admitted he admires FlyingThunderGod’s skill, Madara has to consciously restrain himself from smashing his laptop against the wall.

“You can just tell him you like him, you know.”

Madara startles, almost stumbling to the floor when Hashirama returns with their drinks and quickly put-together snacks, always the one to rummage through Madara’s kitchen because Madara hardly cares what edible and inedible things existed there or what to do with themーthat’s Izuna’s job.

“I do not,” Madara snarls, as Hashirama flops next to him on the couch, “like that stupid clusterfuck you call a brother!”

“Madara!” Hashirama whines, with that ever-present pout on his face. “Be civil.”

“Yeah, when he returns the favor,” Madara glowers, grabbing a milkshake from Hashirama’s hand. “Did you forget that he fucking started it? Do I need to quote his “pitifully adorable how so much stupidity can fit in such a short man” again?” Madara can’t help flailing his arms a little, though far too conscious of this habit now since the Tobirama has started pointing it out. He makes up for it with what he hopes is a deadly enough glare. “Did no one in your family bother to teach him manners? Did you?”

Hashirama only sighs. “And did you forget,” he asks, “how before that you abused my invitation over to our place to hide his Golden Youtube Gamer Tablet?”

Madara groans. “It’s called a Gold Play Button. Idiot.”

“Now you’re insulting me,” Hashirama grumbles, “and who cares? The point is, you’d be upset too if he hid yours.”

“Youtubers care,” Madara says, “and also, that’s irrelevant, that was revenge for him making fun of my perfectly adequate gameplay.”

“To be fair, you were dying quite a lot in that playthrough...”

“He took twelve seconds longer to figure out that puzzle in the game!” Madara growls.

Hashirama rolls his eyes. “Well, of course, because that Yellow Flash guy was flirting and distracting him in the chat.”

Madara blanches. "That good-for-nothing pipsqueak was what?”

“See,” Hashirama drawls, “you are jealous. Why would you be jealous?”

“I-I’m not!”

“Madara, you are so far in denial, that as your best friend,” Hashirama says firmly, slapping a hand over Madara’s mouth before he can muster another protest, “I cannot stand by and watch you suffer. Anymore, that is, because this has reached a breaking point. So, please, for me, I am begging you, just try politely asking if maybe Tobirama would like to accompany you for coffee somewhere tomorrow? Maybe brunch? I mean, come on, I know you guys don’t hate each other anymore. Seriously, you guys seem like you enjoy arguments, and hey, who am I to judge how people express affection?”

“Affection?!” Madara shrieks, shoving Hashirama’s hand away.

“And please stop pretending you don’t have printed out screenshots of my brother’s videos hidden under your mattress because Izunaー”

“Is a fucking snooping rat!” Madara hisses.

Hashirama sighs. “If it helps you feel better, maybe Tobirama might possibly not feel extreme dislike towards you but actually the opposite,” he says, smiling nervously as Madara blanches.

Because... what?

He blinks, running Hashirama’s words through his mind again.

“And how would you know that?” he asks, suspicious. “I swear if you dared tell him anything about my possibly nonexistent feelingsー”

“Possibly?” Excitement starts bubbling in Hashirama’s eyes. “That’s progress!”

“Definitely nonexistent feelings, dammit!”

Hashirama, the asshole Madara calls best friend for some reason, giggles. “Don’t worry, I didn’t. I promise, stop glaring or I will start pouting,” he threatens, and Madara schools his expression back into a light scowl to avoid the infamous Senju pout.

Like a curse, memories of said pout curling Tobirama’s lips spring to mind, and Madara has to physically shake his head to banish those thoughts.

“Listen, the fact that we’re not as... aggressive as we used to be,” Madara says, “doesn’t mean we suddenly like each other.”

“Madara, you insist on coming along every time we hang out,” Hashirama points out.

“I like hanging out with you.”

“Yet every time we do,” Hashirama presses on, “you’re hyperfocused on bickering with Tobirama instead of talking about wholesome stuff with me. Did you even notice that I brought Mito with me the past few times and it was literally a double date?”

“Was not!” Madara shoves at Hashirama with his shoulder and stands up to pace, because there goes the tell-tale sweating of his hands, the fluttering in his chest and stomach and the memoriesーof him and Tobirama secretly filming the other on camera when they do stupid shit, their almost daily Best Playground Insult Contest that’s been memed half to death on Twitter, the one time they got separated from Hashirama and Izuna in Disneyland because they’d got caught in their arguments so much it devolved into discussing their favorite games and an actual conversation that had Madara’s insides tingling.

No.

No, no, no. If anything, they were just gradually becoming something not unlike friends. And Madara’s occasional fantasies behind closed doors were nothing but a means to a pleasant end.

Not. Feelings.

No matter how much he’s grown attached to the site of messy, white-gray hair that he knows is soft to the touch from all the times he’s tugged on it to irritate him. No matter how piercing Tobirama’s unique red eyes may look. No matter how objectively hot his recent workout routine video wasーand Madara knows he’d only watched it so many times because he wants to improve his own routine, right?

Right?

Madara groans. “Why are emotions so fucking confusing!” He slumps onto the floor and wraps his arms around his knees, hitting his head over and over again on his kneecaps because, “I don’t even know what I want from him, okay?”

There’s a brief silence before Hashirama joins him and keeps him from abusing his head further. “How about,” Hashirama suggests, rubbing a comforting hand on his back, “you just ask? Listen, he’s my brother. And you’re my best friend. You two fighting less and at least making an effort to get to know each other better?” Hashirama brings out the puppy dog eyes. “That would mean the world for me.”

Madara glances at him before looking away again, focusing on a random photo of the wall. One featuring Tobirama right after his university graduation with a wide smile on his face. Quite the adorable face, too, and the unprompted thought makes Madara want to descend into oblivion. Preferably forever.

“That’s difficult,” he says lamely.

“But not impossible,” Hashirama says, “and hey, it’s better than waiting for the Yellow Flash guy to actually make a move on Tobi and start occupying all of his time. He’s a really big fan.”

“Fuck Minato,” Madara scoffs, “the guy just showed up and is just shamelessly emulating Tobirama’s style. That’s dumb.”

“Dumber than you claim Tobi is?” Hashirama prompts.

Madara thinks about it. “You know what? Yes.”

“As I saidーprogress!”

Madara can never go through with his impulses to punch his well-meaning best friend, and so grabs the nearest pillow from the couch and smashes it into Hashirama���s face to shut him up.

Tobirama returns home only to find Hashirama and Madara standing by the front door, frowning as they watched something that sounded like a tsunami of some kind.

“Listen, it’s gotta be one of those black holes or something twisting that vortex. Look how stuff disappears right into it!” is his brother talking, and Tobirama is already heaving a frustrated sigh.

Please don’t tell me you think there’s a black hole on Earth.

“There’s no black holes on Earth, idiot! The nearest one is way off, like near Pluto or something,” Madara says.

Ah. Even better. Tobirama chuckles under his breath, crosses his arms and leans against the wall, observing the two idiots he knows and loves.

He mentally kicks himself.

Well, one of them, he loves. Of course he loves his brother.

The other is... complicated.

“And besides, that could just be the Loch Ness monster or a cthulhu or something. See how dark the water is?”

“Or maybe,” Tobirama says, making them both jump, “it’s a natural phenomenon that’s a tad too difficult for both your brain cells to comprehend? I’m happy to explain though.”

“I’m happy to see you fuck yourself,” Madara greets him his usual way, scowling despite the exceptionally conspicuous blush painting his cheeks.

The contrast never fails to make Tobirama’s heart beat faster. He hates himself for it.

“Mm, Madara,” Tobirama teases, “not in front of my brother.”

As expected, Madara starts spluttering, and Tobirama is left wondering again how he avoids making a total fool of himself in each and every one of his videos. It seems Madara saves most of his flailing for the comment section.

“You,” Madara snarls, pointing Tobirama’s way, “are an asshole, Senju, but spending time with the better part of society might do you some good. So see you at brunch tomorrow and do not be late.”

And with that, Madara gives Hashirama a cursory wave and stalks off, leaving Tobirama frozen on the spot.

Did Madara just?..

Tobirama blinks, swallowing heavily as he feels his throat running dry and his heart rate pick up.

No fucking way.

He must have imagined it. Through his stupor of trying to figure out what the hell just took place, Tobirama vaguely registers Hashirama’s facepalm.

“Sorry for that,” Tobirama hears his brother speak through the rush in his ears. “He meant, uh, will you please join him for brunch? Tomorrow at 11 am, Eggspectation?”

Tobirama blinks harder.

“I,” he starts, “I don’t... Did you blackmail Madara into asking me out?”

Hashirama looks scandalized. “What? No!”

“Did Madara just ask me out?”

“Well, yes, Tobi.” Hashirama chuckles nervously. “You sure you’re feeling okay?”

Tobirama glares. “The idiot’s wake up text to me today was literally a collection of trashy limerick poems about how much I suck. Sorry if I’m a little skeptical.”

“You,” Hashirama says, wincing as a long-suffering expression settles on his face, “you guys send wake up texts to each other?”

A moment of awkward silence hangs in the air.

“Sometimes,” Tobirama says, defensive, although the damage is already done.

“And you’re still not going out? Tobirama, you do realize he’s in love with you, right?”

“Don’t say things like that, Anija!” Tobirama snaps, hoping the dim lighting in the corridor conceals the blush he can feel heating up his cheeks. Fuck. Now he’s turning Madara. “Yet, I mean.”

“I’ll save the celebrations until after your date then!” Hashirama sing-songs like the idiot he is.

Tobirama resigns to his fate. “I hate you.”

“You love me.”

“You’re ridiculous.”

“You’ll thank me for this.”

“If it goes well,” Tobirama glowers though it’s ineffective, really, against his brother’s bubbling positivity, and the sheer awe still coursing through him from Madara asking him out on a fucking date is actually enough to make Tobirama want to hug him. He refrains. "Now, thanks, Anija, but I have work things to attend to.”

“Sure! Just don’t forget, 11ー”

“Eleven eggs and uh, no expectations, got it.”

“Wait, Tobi, noー”

With no time to waste, naturally, Tobirama bolts into their apartment and straight to his room to choose an appropriate outfit. And to mentally prepare himself for something he’s almost given up hoping for.

Tobirama cannotーwill notーmess this up.

Tobirama makes sure to arrive about ten minutes early. Not because he’s worried or nervous, of course; maybe just a little, but mostly just to get his bearings beforeーfinallyーa date with Madara goddamn Uchiha.

Madara, who’s been Tobirama’s stupid crush since high school, and just as in love with gaming as he is, only that didn’t turn out to be such a great bonding point between them, as Tobirama had hopedーbefore he actually got to know his Anija’s best friend.

Madara, who seemed to dislike Tobirama at first sight and only grew to hate him more over the years as they both found more joy in arguing than they did in talking.

Madara, who, despite this, blushes every rare time Tobirama genuinely smiles at him or drops a suggestive joke, who has an arguably unhealthy obsession with Tobirama’s ass which he always ogles when he thinks no one is looking.

Madara, whose plastered ass Tobirama had to drag home the other week, amid drunken speeches about capitalist injustice, some wacky conspiracy behind the disappearance of the dodo bird and... something quite interesting.

 “Listen, Senju,” Madara was slurring against Tobirama’s shoulder, as the latter cursed every single nonexistent god that Hashirama had chosen that fucking day to go on a road trip with Mito, Toka and Izuna, leaving Tobirama in charge of this walking trash fire of a man. “Listen. Tobira... Tobi. Tobirama. You’re so hot.”

The words almost made Tobirama stumble.

“What, Uchiha?”

“And cute... So pretty, too, I wish you could see that...” Madara went on babbling. “I think you do. But still. Wish you could see me like I do. I mean see you. Like I do...”

“Tobira, you’re just, you’re unfair...”

“I hate you and I like you then I love you and I hate you again, why you’reー” A hiccup. “How do you exist...”

“I just want to hold hands and just... walk and talk and be together and...”

Tobirama watched in ever mounting confusion as Madara leaned completely into him, humming as he hugged Tobirama tightly and said,

“Is that too fucking much to ask...”

Tobirama stood, shell-shocked, with Madara whispering impossible nonsense in his arms, wondering if he was in a dream.

 The next day saw Madara returning to his usual self insulting Tobirama at every goddamn opportunity, which left Tobirama... confused.

Confused, and conflicted, and sleepless for the rest of the night, thoughts held captive by the utter idiot whose ultimate goal seems to be to ruin Tobirama’s life.

It’s maddening.

Of course, he’d suspected that Madara’s flailing and constant blushing interspersed with screams and insults (the most creative ones, reserved only for Tobirama, it seemed) were signs of not so much dislike, as the complete opposite. Of course, Tobirama had tried flirting with Madara, just bordering right there on the edge of suggestive, only for his advances to be seen as patronizing or condescending. And hearing Madara speak to him this way, in a drunken stupor no less, when he’d probably have no causeーor abilityーto lie is...

Maddening. Annoying. Exhilarating. A tantalizing opportunity. Maybe a glimmer of hope.

And of course, Tobirama told his brother; they never really had any secrets between them. And of fucking course Hashirama had a hand in convincing Madara to change his usual behavior, which is nice and all, but doesn’t help the nerves wracking through Tobirama’s body, nor the crippling fear that he’s going to somehow screw this up.

But no. Deep breath. Exhale. And remember Anija’s advice.

Tobirama takes the last turn before he’s faced with their meeting place, surprised to find Madara already there.

Even though he’s usually always late. Sitting inside by the window, looking out onto the street with a slight frown, Madara keeps worrying his bottom lip and, apparently, trying to break a spoon.

It paints an endearing picture. Tobirama sighs, feeling a smile tugging at his lips.

This man...

Tobirama comes in, approaching him slowly, allowing himself a few moments to watch Madara needlessly fix his wild mane of hair, appraise his reflection in the spoon, try out several fake-looking smiles before settling on a scowl and going back to his nervous tics again. With another sigh, Tobirama takes the few steps left to his date, repeating Hashirama’s advice over and over in his head.

Just be yourselfーand have fun!

Just a few minutes into their date, it becomes obvious that Madara didn’t get the same advice from Hashirama.

Or just didn’t get the advice, period.

With their orders made and beverages served, they’re left to wallow in a less than comfortable silence, broken only by Madara’s... uncharacteristic attempts at conversation.

“Are you enjoying the tea?” Madara asks Tobirama with all of the softness of a brick wall.

Tobirama isn’t used to the man being eloquent, much less polite, and he has yet to have at least one conversation with Madara that doesn’t devolve into a pissing contest. So theoretically, Tobirama should be enjoying this.

But it only seems wrong. Annoying. Not them.

He tries to recall if, maybe, their first meeting was an adequate exchange? Tobirama thinks to the day Hashirama first introduced them. Only flashes of spilled milkshakes and jibes at intelligence run through his mind, and of course that was the very first time he’d called Madara an idiot pipsqueak, receiving quite the lame ‘stuck-up dandelion’ in turn.

Unsurprising.

“Yes,” Tobirama says, taking another sip as he eyes Madara struggling on the other side of the table. Struggling to do what is the question: either sit straight, or assume a more relaxed posture, or reach towards his own drink, or avoid eye contact, even though he keeps glancing his way when he thinks Tobirama won’t notice. Tobirama does, every time, and that just makes the whole ordeal more awkward. “Nice weather,” Tobirama says, with about as much enthusiasm.

If Madara wants to play this stupid game, Tobirama will indulge. Just to see how long it takes for Madara to break and return to his blustering status quo.

“Yeah...” Madara clears his throat, eye twitching as he manages to hold Tobirama’s gaze for a commendable three seconds this time. “Hate the sun. I meanーI mean I love the sun. Ugh. It just, uh. Burns.”

It’s both saddening and funny to see Madara visibly deflate.

“Skin too sensitive, huh?” Tobirama starts small. “Just like your ego?”

Madara’s jaw clenches and his nervous look shifts into a glare before he looks away again, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath to calm himself down before he flashes an unnaturally cheery smile.

“Heh, nice,” Madara grits through his teeth, “nice joke, Senju.”

Tobirama raises his eyebrow as Madara flinches at his own words.

“I’m glad you appreciate my sense of humor,” Tobirama says, barely reining in a smirk.

“Sure! You’reーyou’re funny.”

“And?”

“And what?” Madara frowns, confused.

“And what else am I?” Tobirama demands, feigning thoughtfulness. “A recent assessment of yours was that I look and act like a self-obsessed dumbass, I think.”

“No-no,” Madara blurts out, looking much a cornered animal, “I think you... you are... you look not at all so terrible today?” he finishes with a nervous chuckle, running a hand through his hair.

Tobirama wants to scream from the agony.

No. This won’t do, otherwise he might as well leave.

“Can you just call me a stuck-up asshole like you always do or recite one of those horrible limerick disses?” he demands.

Madara actually yelps. “What? No! I mean, wait.” He narrows his eyes. “Why?”

“Because you’re acting weird.”

“We’re on a date, if you were too stupーpreoccupied to get my invitation, Senju,” Madara says, jaw still clenched as he doubtless refrains from swearing, “and I’m being civil!”

That’s the advice he must have gotten from Anija, Tobirama thinks.

What a tragedy.

“Madara,” Tobirama implores, leaning his eyebrows on the table and meeting Uchiha’s gaze, “have you considered thatーI prefer it when you aren’t?”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake, thank fuck!” Madara slams his hands on the table, heaving a massive sigh as Tobirama laughs in relief. “I was ready to fucking die, you piece of shit! How does your brother stay so fucking kind all the time, it’s fucking torture!”

Tobirama rolls his eyes. “It’s a talent, naturally. Just like your talent at embarrassing yourself and mine at being awesome.”

“You’ve got it a little backwards, Senju,” Madara sneers, “but it’s excusable, given your level of intellect.”

“Twice as high as yours?” Tobirama parries.

“Twice as little.”

“That’s more like it,” Tobirama says, grinning despite himself, “I thought you were a decoy or something. You’ve told me to fuck off every single day since we first met and this was getting worrisome.”

Madara’s laugh is sudden, melodic, sending those irritating tingling sensations through Tobirama’s body. He makes an effort to appear outwardly calm.

“Maybe because you managed to piss me the fuck off every day that I’ve known you,” Madara scoffs, “but you’re all right sometimes. I guess.” He shrugs, feigning nonchalance even as he keeps nervously fixing and running his fingers through his hair.

A stupid, tantalizing habit. Tobirama imagines carding his own hands through the messy locks, tugging Madara’s head back toー

He forcefully aborts the thought process before he’s faced with a problem of the harder kind. “Oh, I’m sure we’ll try to strangle each other when we game together.”

“We’re playing today?” Madara asks.

Tobirama tilts his head to the side.

“You haven’t planned one gaming session after our date?”

“Um,” Madara says, blinking rapidly, “why should I be the one with the plan?”

“Because you’re the one who invited me,” Tobirama deadpans. And anyway, Madara is always the one to egg Tobirama on to gaming, which would usually only ever lead to semi-playful brawls and their fighting making Hashirama cry.

And without Anija there to assault them with his antics, Tobirama wonders what their play-fighting might lead to... and promptly shuts off those thoughts again. Control, dammit.

Madara opens his mouth, then closes it, sighs explosively and says, “All right, fair enough. But you’re the strategy pro here. And my thing is RPGs.” He smirks. “I can improvise.”

And Madara does, in fact, improvise, leading Tobirama on what he hopes is a satisfying daylong adventure. It’s strange, walking by themselves around Konoha without anyone else with them (not that they’ve taken to ignoring Hashirama and Mito anyway on their most recent group outings), free to talk about and do anything they want. Strange and perfect, the way Tobirama switches between poorly concealed bashfulness and his usual confidence, as their jokes and jibes at each other, every little prank they pull never fails to make them both laugh.

It’s perfect.

Just like Tobirama’s smile is, directed at him without any pretenses as they set off to explore the lush, gigantic forest surrounding the city, rumored to be home to mythical, many-tailed creatures. And that’s followed by their forays into an abandoned chemistry lab; the scares they get in the woods from intermittent growls coming from the shadows are nothing compared to the horror Madara feels when Tobirama insists on touching broken vials and experimental equipment, and going through doors with dilapidated ‘DANGER. CHEMICAL HAZARD’ signs.

“If we’re infected by some deadly and insidious poison,” Madara whispers as they explore the lab’s tunnels, “I’m going to fucking kill you before it does. Painfully.”

“It’s for science,” Tobirama says. “And trust me. We’re safe. I got a degree in this.”

“Youtube is practically your full-time job at this point. What the fuck else do you need?”

“The satisfaction of discovering something cool?”

“And deadly.”

"Unlikely.”

Madara groans, cursing his life, as well as his inability to say no to hisーapparentlyーnew boyfriend.

The boyfriend who’s just discovered another hidden pathway to a deeper level and has scurried off towards it like an excited five-year-old. Despite himself, despite his intent to keep complaining, Madara can’t hold back the grin tugging at his lips.

Still perfect.

Just like their lunch date which turns into a picnic by the Naka river, where Madara remembers meeting Hashirama way back when. Just like the first time Tobirama grasps his hand, fingers gently massaging it as he laughs at Madara stuttering to a stop from whatever rant he’d been on, heart in his throat and mind suddenly focused on whether his palms are too sweaty or not.

His mind goes blank. Eyes focus only on the man in front of him, whom he yearns to strangle just as often as he craves to tackle him onto any surface and ruin him completely. And it should feel wrong, it should be, only Madara hasn’t quite felt so right about anything in a long time, and with every minute they spend with their familiar bickering, just with a layer of something more behind it this time, it becomes harder and harder to deny how good being near Tobirama makes him feel. Happy. Complete.

Madara winces. Oh, gods. He’s waxing poetic now.

All worries about that fly out the window when Tobirama, without so much as a word of warning, leans in and draws Madara by his collar into a kiss.

Surprisingly, he doesn’t spring up to awaken alone in his bed like he always does, after dreams like these.

And, unsurprisingly, it turns out to be Madara’s best kiss to date.

Maybe he’s exaggerating, if just because he’s been craving this so damn much. Tobirama’s lips are hot, gentle, and welcoming against his, a curious tongue darting out to coax Madara’s lips open and deepen the kiss. The delightful drag of his tongue, his hands, rough and demanding on Madara’s chest, waist, thighsーit’s not long before he’s dizzy with it, barely holding back moans of pleasure for fear of sounding too desperate.

“Fuck,” Madara gasps as they pull away for breath, lips still touching as their eyes stay locked and he’s treated to Tobirama’s downright ravenous gaze. “That wasー”

Tobirama cuts him off with another kiss, then another, and it’s not long before they find themselves tangled in a mess of limbs and loose clothing. The hard ground presses against Madara’s back as Tobirama settles on top of him, ravaging Madara’s mouth with a passion that soon has his pants feeling too tight.

Fuck.

He groans, hips thrusting of their own accord and feeling Tobirama's own erection through the fabric.

Madara makes an immense effort to pull away, stifling a whine at the loss of contact.

“Bed,” he says, mortified at his own crudeness far too late after the word comes out. “Fuck, I meantー”

“Yes,” Tobirama growls, capturing Madara’s lips in another open-mouthed kiss before he hauls him up to start gathering their things. “Your place or mine?”

“Yours? Izuna,” Madara rasps, head too clouded to explain more in-depth, but Tobirama seems to understand.

“Anija shouldn’t be back for a while,” Tobirama says, a devastating grin on his face, “lots of time for us to play.”

Gods.

Madara scrambles to his feet fast enough to stumble, and for once, Tobirama has nothing to say about his clumsiness.

They all but crash through the front door, not even bothering to lock it as they rush through a cursory check to make sure Hashirama is out like he said he’d be.

“Fuck, thank the gods,” Tobirama sighs in relief before dragging Madara back into liplock.

Madara can’t hold back a moan this time, heat ratcheting up between them as he wraps his hands around Tobirama’s neck, pulling him closer as they stumble to the couch. Madara ends up straddling him just so that their cocks brush through too-rough clothing, kiss growing urgent and sloppy, as wandering hands touching every inch of uncovered skin.

Clothes fall away, leaving them both shirtless, and Madara needs a few moments to take in the miles of pale skin, so soft to the touch, toned muscles rippling as Tobirama squirms under him, gasps and groans escaping his lips in answer to every one of Madara’s touches. He leans in to mouth Tobirama’s neck, sucking bruising kisses onto the soft skin there pleasure flaring at the base of his stomach each time Tobirama moans and arches against him.

“You’re so sensitive,” Madara whispers, with a hint of incredulity. “That’s... fuck.”

“Yeah,” Tobirama rasps, eyes unfocused, “because... just get on with it.”

“If I knew this is what it took to finally get you to shut up,” Madara chuckles, “I would have tried this a long time ago.”

If he weren’t so sure Tobirama genuinely despised him. Butー

“I fucking wished you would!” Tobirama snaps, though the irritation rings hollow with the breathless tone.

Madara blinks in shock.

“You did?” Madara asks, moving lower to lap at Tobirama’s nipple, sucking the hardened nub into his mouth and eliciting another delicious whimper. “You thought about this? About my hands on you, touching you?”

“Yes!” The desperation in his tone only adds to Madara’s mounting confidence, one that he so rarely ever feels in Tobirama’s presence.

“My mouth on your cock,” he continues, heart hammering against his ribs as he trails kisses lower and lower, “would you like that? While I finger you, getting you ready to take me?”

“Yes, yes, yes,” Tobirama’s hips jerk, making them both moan at the friction.

“Off,” Madara grunts, tugging at Tobirama’s pants with one hand as the other works the belt off his own. They scramble, a bit awkwardly, until they’re both naked and sprawled on top of each other, and Madara all but drools at the sight of Tobirama’s cock, hard and straining, beads of precum already leaking from the tip.

Perfect.

It’s tempting to just let go but Madara decides to take his time. Strokes Tobirama’s sides and chest, fingers his nipples, kisses every inch of skin he can reach, sucking bruises and biting slightly. He marvels at every little keen and groan he wrings from Tobirama, relishing how needy he grows with each second, how he moans Madara’s name, curses him and urges Madara to touch him, sliding his dick against his and huffing when Madara doesn’t do anything about it, before finally devolving into pleading.

Just what Madara’s been waiting for.

“Madara, please,” Tobirama’s whines, a soft, desperate sound that makes Madara groan in turn.

“Please what?” he asks, knowing he’s being a tease and enjoying the hell out of it.

Tobirama musters a pretty non-intimidating glare. “Just... fuck.”

“Tell me.”

“Fuck you.”

“Is that what you want?” Madara raises an eyebrow, making sure to wet his lips, letting his tongue gently graze the head of Tobirama’s cock. “I can bottom. I don’t mind.”

“Fuck!” Tobirama squeezes his eyes shut, heavy breathing interspersed with desperate whines. “Just... suck me off. Please. Now.”

“That’s it, Tobirama,” Madara drags out the syllables of his name, a smirk tugging at his lips, “when you ask so nicely, how can I refuse?”

He wraps his lipsーfinallyーaround the head, licking at the salty fluid gathered there, ears ringing from the heady feel of Tobirama’s cock against his mouth, his hands tangling in Madara’s hair, the sounds slipping from Tobirama’s lips that are borderline fucking obscene. Madara takes a breath to brace himself and takes Tobirama a few inches deeper. His length is hot, stiff, and heavy in his mouth as Madara presses the flat of his tongue against the underside, sucking hard, wringing another delectable whimper. Tobirama’s thrusts up, cock hitting the back of his throat, and Madara chokes for a moment, his own dick jerking at the sensation.

“Madara,” Tobirama breathes, “Madara, gods, you feel amazing.”

The words send another rush of pleasure through him, and Madara takes himself in hand to release some of the unbearable tension, stroking himself slowly as he relaxes his throat and sinks down to take Tobirama to the base.

Tobirama’s moan is a sweet, drawn-out melody. One that Madara enjoys making louder and louder as he starts moving, setting a fast-paced rhythm, uncaring for how debauched he may look, drool leaking out of his mouth and coating Tobirama’s cock, throat constricting around it as he takes him deep, lets him stay there, tongue gliding along his shaft. Tobirama soon devolves into barely coherent pleading, until ‘please’, and ‘more’, and Madara’s name are the only words coming out of his mouth.

It’s intoxicating. Overwhelming, far too much. Madara gives up stroking himself, the pleasure ramping up far too quickly, too soon, though Tobirama isn’t doing much better. Madara draws his lips up along his length, lapping up more precum gathered at the head, even as Tobirama’s hips jerk again and the hand in Madara’s hair tightens, urging him back down.

“Madara, please,” Tobirama keens, “I need...”

Madara has a pretty good idea of what he needs. He swirls his tongue over the head, descending again until his nose is pressed against Tobirama’s stomach. Madara swallows around him once, twice, a third time before he feels Tobirama nudging at his shoulder in a warning he doesn’t pay heed to, starting to bob his head again, wrapping his fingers around the base of Tobirama’s cock, using both his mouth and hand to bring him to completion.

“Fuck, Madara, Iー”

Madara lets out a muffled groan once he feels cum spilling against his tongue, swallowing rapidly as Tobirama’s cock pulses, again and again, through an orgasm that has him writhing and and trembling underneath him, hands tightening in Madara’s hair enough to hurt with the kind of tantalizing pain that only adds to the pleasure.

“You feel so fucking good,” Tobirama pants, watching Madara through white lashes, eyes dark and hazy as another shudder runs through him, “fuckーI want...”

Madara releases him with a wet pop. “Want what, Tobirama?” he whispers, voice too hoarse for him to speak properly.

Tobirama grips his shoulders in lieu of an answer, directing Madara to turn around so his back is pressed against his chest.

Then Tobirama’s hand wraps around his cock andーoh.

Madara has pretty much forgotten about his own pleasure, too focused on not coming too soon and making sure Tobirama was enjoying himself.

“My turn,” Tobirama murmurs against his ear, tone still breathless but with a commanding edge to it now that makes Madara shiver, “and lemmeーlet me hear you, Madara.”

Gods. He groans just from the sound of Tobirama’s voice. The feel of his teeth nibbling at his earlobe, his hand setting a quick, harsh rhythm that builds up the pleasure to impossible degrees. Tobirama’s heated skin pressed against his back, his thighs, the fingers of his other hand carding through his hair with a gentleness that contrasts with his harshness before.

It’s too much.

“Go on, Madara.”

Tobirama’s fingers swiping at the precome gathering at the head of Madara’s cock, smearing it over his shaft. His voice, a muffled whisper coaxing Madara to let go, to come for him, to say Tobirama’s nameー

“Just like that, Madara,” Tobirama grunts, “louder for me, come on.”

Madara thrusts into his grip, all but fucking into Tobirama’s fist at this point, moans his name as the heat grows unbearable the closer he gets to release.

“To-bi-rama...” He comes with a broken groan slipping from his lips as cum spills all over his stomach and Tobirama’s hand, each pulse coming stronger than the last, leaving him dizzy and boneless in Tobirama’s arms for however long it takes for his orgasm to abate.

Feels like forever. Probably a lot less. Time does seem to slow down, though, both of them collapsing against each other onto the cushions, breathing raggedly and curling into each other as Madara turns to bury his head in the crook of Tobirama’s neck.

It still seems unreal. Too perfect. So right.

They lie there for a minutes, coming down from the high, limbs tangled and lazy kisses exchanged here and there. Tobirama looks so peaceful, like Madara’s never seen him before: eyes half-lidded, hair messier than ever, sticking in every direction, skin still flushed and marked, all over, with hickeys and teeth marks, the mere sight of which has Madara’s dick stirring in interest, recent orgasm or no.

“You know,” Madara says, hands running over Tobirama’s chest, barely grazing his still sensitive nipples and making him shiver, “if this is the game you want to play, I’m really not against binging it. The rest of the dayーweekend, if you want.” Madara presses a kiss to Tobirama’s neck. “Make the playthrough as thorough as possible.” To his collarbone. “Unlock all achievements and, uh,” Madara trails his hand along Tobirama’s chest to his groin, past his length and to his ass, "explore every location.”

“If that was some thinly veiled euphemism,” Tobirama says, barely holding in laughter, “for you wanting to fuck me sideways...” Madara holds Tobirama’s gaze as his fingers hover just over Tobirama’s hole. “Then Madara, for fuck’s sake, stop trying to be subtle and get to work.”

Madara barks out a laugh.

“Whatever you say, Tobirama.”

Madara dips his voice low and deep, like he’s noticed Tobirama loves, and relishes the whimper it earns him. Relishes the way Tobirama arches against him, looking for friction, how delectable he looks, ready and responsive, so eager for Madara’s touch.

He knows then and there that if it’s up to him, Madara will do anything to make this last.

[mister-lady]

I did fic gmkfkdkfr. And it what, only took me several weeks to write a fic for Dice? Mvgkdkkf. This was still fun and I liked it :3 and sorry if ttheres a lot of typos, I only seemed to be able to write this before I went to bed or before I woke up so it might be a little sloppy fkdkdkdk this was also a lot longer than I intended so ubm,, sorry about that

AU: uhh.. I dont know if theres a proper au name? Store clerk au? Idk but you'll get it cjfms

TW: talk about food, mention of blood, mention of looking like someone got murdered, talk about sharks eating someone

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Matt had a party he was invited too, and for Matt this was a special occasion, so he decided to go out and get some formal wear! He had a few dresses and such at home, but he wanted something with a newer and fresher feeling. Lucky for him, there was a nearby tailor shop that he knew about. He's never been to the tailor shop because he's never really needed anything from the place, so he was a mixture of excitement and nervousness at going. Thankfully for him, the nervousness wasn't too overwhelming this time.

As Matt stepped into the tailor shop, he was quickly hit with the smell of strong perfume- or was it cologne? Either way it was powerful enough to give him a small headache the second he walked it. He couldn't help but notice the small bell that jingled as he walked in, and smiled at the noise. Matt decided to look around, and caught a glimpse of a perfume stand that had it's own counter and shelf to it. Matt could only guess that's what was causing his headache. He couldn't help but also notice how big the store was too. He expected it to be some small tailor shop like the stores you would find inside a mall, but this once mind as well be the mall. He could only imagine how much money this place was gaining to be so big, and the concerned him because that normally ment it was pricey, and Matt wasn't really in the mood to go 50 miles elsewhere because he was a broke sucker. The interior had bright white walls and white floor tiles too, and the lights made the whole place seem to glow, only contributing to his minor headache. Though, it did make sense that they would need good lighting if it was a tailor shop, which seemed to have mini stands inside that sold other stuff, like the perfume one he had spotted earlier. Matt walked further in to get a better look and saw some other people that were presumably with store clerks that were taking their measurements or picking out clothing that would work with them. Matt also noticed that the majority of customers were females, which made him grow a little self conscious and contrary to what the website said, he almost started to doubt if this place had items for more masculine customers like himself. Matt hadn't gotten too far into the store before being abruptly stopped by someone. Matt shrunk a little, the person that stopped him looked rather intimidating, they were wearing mostly black clothing that hugged his body and had a scarf wrapped around his neck even while indoors, and also had a pair of shaded circle glasses that made it harder to see his eyes, again, while also indoors. 

"And what brings you here?" The mystery person had asked.

Matt quickly scanned the person for a nametag, and found one on his chest with his name written on it. "Uhmm… I came here to maybe find an outfit for a party I need to go to later?" Matt was debating if he should bother using the person's name, as he wasn't ready to potentially butcher it.

"A party? Tacky; but fine. Come with me I'll help you pick out something." The man waved his hand, signaling Matt to follow him.

"T-tacky??" Matt blurted out before wishing he hadn't spoken up.

"Uhm, yeah. Tacky. We sell things like dresses and suits, not poorly colored and terrible silk clothing for a party no one is going to remember." The person didn't even turn around to face Matt while speaking, and kept walking.

Matt was left speachless, he didn't even know how to respond to that, especially because it was a slightly true statement. After a few minutes of Matt not knowing what to say, and feeling stupidly shy, he decided to at least look around and see if anything caught his eye. Matt didn't realize that the person he was following had stopped, and almost bumped into him. 

"Here, stand on this stool." The guy pointed to a small stool that was set infront of a mirror against a wall. 

Matt obeyed and stepped onto the stool. He looked at himself in the mirror before quickly looking away for several reasons.

"Stand up straight." The idiot wearing glasses indoors ordered.

Matt quickly shot up and fixed his posture and stretched his arms out straight and was quickly filled with embarrassment. The worker pulled out a tape measurement and quickly started taking Matt's measurements. Matt, like the dork he is, felt his cheeks flush at someones hands being so close to his body, especially when taking measurements for clothing, which that normally required waist and bust measurements. Matt looked away, avoiding eye contact like it would kill him. He was probably making the situation seem worse that it probably was. The worker stood up and put the tape measurement back into his pocket before seeming to think about something.

"Don't you need to write the measurements down?" Matt shyly asked.

"I do this every day as a job, I have it in my head." The worker spoke with a tinge of sass in his voice. "What are you particularly looking for, anyways?" 

"Uhm.. well, I was mostly looking for a suit, though I normally don't wear the overcoat with it so maybe just a fine button-up shirt with a tie?" Matt had subconsciously reverted back to being slightly hunched over and his hands were fiddling around with the cuffs of his sleeves. 

"I'm sure I can find something for that. Any particular color you're looking for? And what type of tie? Are you allergic to any fabrics? I need all the details." 

Matt was overwhelmed by the sudden burst of so many questions and almost immediately blanked on anything he was just asked. "Oh I uh.. I'm not allergic to anything, uhm.. I'm not too picky about color, and I'd prefer a bowtie." 

"Very specific, aren't we?" The worker teased.

"Well I don't want to seem too picky, I mean I don't want anything too expensive." Matt stumbled over his words.

"Darling, being picky here is what we need. Lucky for you I'm not someone that just throws anything on you for money." 

"Ah yes, how lucky I am." Matt muttered sarcastically.

"So, are you sure you don't have a preference? Becuase I don't want to pick soemthing for you and you go complaining." 

"I won't complain!" Matt stubbornly said.

"Fine, fine. You're words not mine." Then he walked off, probably to go and find something for Matt.

Matt couldn't help but think how oddly the place was ran. Matt didn't expect it to be that they pick something for you, he thought it'd be like any normal clothing store, where he could pick out what he wanted to wear. Of course, if a customer pointed out something they liked then the worker would probably get it for them or allow them to look around, but Matt would rather die than speak up like a normal person. Plus, this guy seemed to know what he was doing anyways, so Matt didn't mind too hard. While Matt was thinking about looking around he decided to see what was around him anyways. There was a small jewelry section nearby which probably had necklaces and earrings and chains and bracelets. There were also shelves on either side of Matt, not too close to him, but if he stretched out both of his arms fully, he could probably touch the two shelves. They looked like they would be shoe wrecks, but actually had folded clothing on them. Matt noticed an orange Hawaiian shirt with pineapple print all over it and three white buttons extending down from the collar of the shirt. He couldn't help but giggle as he picked it up, but made sure to not unfold it in the process. I mean, it was a party after all, right? Not some elegant ball. And it's not like a silly pineapple shirt hurt anyone anyways, right? He carefully set it back where he had grabbed it from, and eagerly scanned the shelves for anything else that might catch his interest. Most of the things on the shelves, as for the rest of the store, were all silky material stuff or fancy and were probably meant for more special occasions rather than a party that Matt was going to sit out in the bathroom all night. Yet… something felt different about the clothing on these shelves. Most of the shelves were a beaming white, and only had three or four shelves near the bottom for shoes and some folded pants or socks and stockings, and had hangers at the top for skirts and dresses and shirts and gowns and such. The shelves near Matt were brown and only had folded clothing on it. And Matt just noticed the prices were a lot cheaper too. It was like he found the discount regect section of the store. Though, Matt didn't mind it too much because he found a shirt he liked.

Matt was so lost in thought, he didn't realize his "buddy" had already came back. Matt actually didn't even know until a shirt got tossed at him, causing him to almost drop it. Matt held it up and examined it. It was a green button-up shirt with black buttons. Matt glanced up at the worker, like he was expecting him to say something, which just lead to them kinda blankly looking at eachother for a little bit.

"Well?" The worker prompted.

"Well what?" Matt echoed.

"Do you like it? I found a pastel purple one too, and you could maybe wear brown slacks with them, but I think black would better suit you." 

"Well I don't mind it, than sounds fine." 

"Don't mind it? We need something you'll love, not just feel neutral towards." The worker said it as if he was offended. "Did anything catch your eye maybe while I was gone?"

Matt hesitated for a moment, and shyly glanced at the pineapple shirt and pointed at it as if he wasn't allowed to touch it. 

"Really? That?" The worker questioned and furrowed his brows.

"W-well you did ask…" 

"Yeah it's just… theres a reason it's in a separated section from everything else." 

"I assumed so, but it's pineapples.." 

"But you'll look like a a torrist that got lost."

"Ouch, thanks."

"Look, I'm trying to say it nicely, but you'll look like a complete dork."

"No dorkier than your name." 

"Hey! My name is not bad, if anything it's plenty better than whatver yours is."

"I didn't say it was bad! I said it was just dorky." Matt said defensively. "I like dorky things. I am a dork." Matt added.

"Yeah, uh, you do realize normally dork isn't a compliment, right?"

"Emphasis on normally."

"Look, if you like my name I'm not going to complain, alright?"

Matt huffed out a sigh. "I just wanted a shirt how do these situations happen to me." 

"Here, I found this too." The worker said and tossed another shirt into Matt's arms.

"Jesus christ." Matt muttered.

"What?" 

"Dice- can I call you that? I mean it's your name but..- Anyways, this shirt stinks."

"How? I mean if you think it's bad you don't have a sense of fashion." 

"I mean, I don't but…anyone looking at me far away will think I got stabbed." 

"And then they come up, see what it really is, and want to try it themselves. It's perfect."

Matt shook his head in silence. The skirt was white, but it had big flowers on it that were a deep red color, making Matt look like someone tried to shank him all over. Matt loved flowers but this was just asking to mess something up.

"If it helps, it's better than your pineapple shirt that you wanted." Dice said, like that was supposed to help somehow.

"If you don't like the pineapple shirt so much, cant I just buy it then?"

"No, I'm trying to save you."

"Save me? The only saving I'll need is from when someone calls the paramedics cause I look like I swam with some sharks." 

"Oh yes, because being dressed like a fruit helps. It's not even a floral print it's a pineapple. I don't even need to explain what's wrong with that."

"Do you do this with every customer or?.."

"No, just you." 

"Wow"

"Theres so much good clothing in here like suits and dresses and better patterns and nicer clothes and things that compliment you, than some pineapple shirt you can get at a Dollar Tree store."

"Y'know, you almost make me want to thank you."

"Well, you should be thanking me." 

"I'm not going to." Matt made sure to say this in a rather playful tone, even though most their conversation had been teasing banter.

"Here, how about we just find something we can both settle on?"

"You're best idea yet. That sounds fine."

"Good." Dice walked off to go and look for something for Matt, but this time Matt decided to follow him as well.

It didn't take long for Dice to spot something and show it to Matt. "Here, how about this?" Dice offered.

Matt recoiled a little bit when it saw it. "It's not bad but..-" 

"But?" Dice cut off Matt.

"Well.. it's so scratchy looking!" 

Dice looked over Matt as if he was trying to check if Matt was being genuine or not. "You haven't even tried it on yet!!"

Matt timidly reach out a hand and rubbed it across the shirt before cringing back a little bit. "No."

Dice sighed before putting the shirt back and going off the hunt for something else suitable for Matt. Matt glanced around, he felt a little bad and a little afraid that he was being annoying, but he tried to push it away. Matt let in an excited gasp as he spotted something, before scampering off to go and pick it up. 

Matt picked it up with a wide grin and held it up to show Dice like he discovered something new.

"That one?" Dice questioned.

"I am not letting you talk me out of this one! It has a space theme and that is final." Matt pointed at the shirt he was holding up, which had stars and planets all over it.

Dice held up a hand to his chin and looked over the shirt like he was considering it. He ended up giving in. "Okay, it's not too bad and I suppose it's better than that pineapple shirt…"

"I don't know what's with you and pineapples but I'll take it!" Matt was beaming and was bouncing on his heels from happiness. 

Dice gently took the shirt from Matt's hands and checked for a price tag. Matt frowned a little, he completely forgot that prices were a thing since he was so caught up in his excitement. Dice glanced around and snagged a pair of long purple jeans and handed the clothing to Matt. 

"How much will it cost?" Matt asked, almost not wanting to hear the answer.

"....I'll just say fifteen dollars." Dice responded.

"For both?" Matt asked, surprised.

"I want to help you pay for it." 

Matt was surprised by the answer. "Are you sure?" 

"Mhm." 

"Isn't that illegal in a way though?.." 

"Maybe if you want to look at it like that, but you're cute so I'm letting it slide."

Matt felt himself get flustered at the comment, whether it was supposed to be flirtatious or not. He decided to not respond and just shake his head in response, though he was pretty sure Dice had noticed anyways.

As Matt ran up to the nearest counter to pay, he couldn't help but feel the need to Wave goodbye to Dice. Things like that happen when you become attached to people after five minutes. Matt was oddly surprised to see Dice wave back but was warmed by the feeling. As Matt ran off to his car so he could try on his clothes sooner, he noticed a small paper hanging out the pocket of the shirt he had just picked out. He grabbed the paper before it could fall out and got deeply flustered and joyous at what was written on it. There was a small drawing of a single die cube, and a phone number written next to it. It didn't take long for Matt to quickly punch the number into his phone and pray it wasn't some rouse. He decided to just send one small message saying "hi :D". Right as Matt went to put his phone back into his pocket, it buzzed signaling he got a new notification. Matt checked it and tensely checked if it was what he was truly hoping for. He read the message so fast he had to read it a second time after not picking up what it had said. It read:

Already texting me right as you just left? Someone's clingy and in love.

Matt sighed and smiled and stuffed his phone back into his pocket. He had a feeling this was going to end up being something he needed to buckle in for, but whether that was necessarily a bad thing? He didn't think it was.

[bedlamgames]

Q&A #103

Today we have the Twine conversion, lesbian training mantras, social lube, a bunch of random stuff from the discord, and a whole lot more. 

[Anonymous said]: I'm really curious what the tally means for your twine conversion posts. Can't seem to figure out what its suppose to represent progress wise...

- Answered this last Q&A. Because of you asking I’ve now also added the explanation to what it’s about to every stream post so I hope that helped with understanding what’s going on with that.

[Anonymous said]: Suggestion: For races that start with a random corruption (ie: Succubi), have an option in full custom to spend points to either narrow what that corruption is (to be one of the four types, for example) or to outright pick one (for a much higher cost).

- That’s a good idea. Being able to pick specifically I think would be too much. There are ALOT of corruptions so that would mean many many menus to be able to select everything. Being able to pick one of the four types seems fair to me as something to spend points on in Full Custom. Added it to my notes. 

[Anonymous said]: Have a succubus slaver who used to be a lamia. On level up, she had the option to get the Fleet trait, which I thought was off-limits for Lamia due to their body shape. I think it's a bug?

- Good spot and should be fixed as of the last update. 

[Anonymous said]: Noticed a bug with No Haven 0.903: If you select a human (or once-human) for your character, and then quick restart, your next character will keep the human's Racial aspect Social Lube. On the topic of that Racial, it says " includes one human, and three other different races/subtypes gain an additional Success" Does that mean one human and three non-humans, or one human and three slavers each of a different race from each other?

-Took me awhile to work this out as going from human to human seemed fine. However you’re right that those with a heritage like demi-angels or succubi will incorrectly keep the previous racial. 

The second so as long as you have at least one human you can get the buff by say having a northerner, noble, wastelander, and convent. 

[Anonymous said]: hi bud, xfto/x421 here, its been a long time i guess. wanted to ask about the status of the no haven/twine conversation. i joined your picardo lately but couldnt post some reports since you dont allow guest-posts. well anyway, the report is about something ridiculous i have found after some restarts, the chosen main charakter (lamia) starts as male with the hard carry aspect(immense shaft) and different description than the ones the perks would give. 1/2

another question, feels like i asked something similiar in the past, how about the integration of different artpacks/access to older pics, or deletion of those that never get used? i guess that would requiere some more access to the game than you allow atm. maybe with twine? do you have a roadmap on tfgames or somewhere for the future of no haven? i know there are some more races you want to implement and improve some systems, but thats it, hope you are doing well in these times. 2/2

I do an update on the patreon every two weeks which is linked on the twitter. You do not need to be a patron to read these and is the best way to stay informed about what I’ve been up to. That includes the status of the conversion. To quickly sum it up;

It's at a stage where all the RAGS to Twine code conversion is basically done. What I need to do now is translate all that work into something playable and there's currently big logic issues with a bunch of the conditions and passages. So what I'm currently doing is trying to tidy up the visual look of the code with a bunch of idents with the theory that will make finding the errors easier.

Alas it’s not me disallowing guest posts... Picarto had some massive stonking issues and so they locked things down hard due to that preventing guests from chatting. I suggest a throwaway email site to get around that.

I don’t think there’s any art in the game file that’s not used as I try to keep on top of deleting the old ones. Not really down for doing art packs of the old ones as due to that not being my art so I see them as placeholder only until they can be replaced by commissions. 

I probably do need to do some kind of roadmap sometime. I’m less keen as it’s kind of a dirty word these days as due to the miss-use of them by others it’s got some bad connontations, but I’m also aware the alternative which is me randomly mentioning stuff on discord/picarto streams leaves the vast majority of my audience in the dark which is also really not ideal.

[Anonymous said]: [no haven 0.903] [Crit no longer grants Bimboborn] okay, but how do I get bimboborn now?

- It’s a corruption. Specifically Blessings of Perversion. 

[Anonymous said]: With the change to training where hypnotic slavers can fully embed the relevant mantras for blowjob, bimbo, and sissy training, could we also get that for lesbian training?

- Yes that’s the plan when I do the third part of lesbian training. Got a set of commissions planned just got to sort the funding and work out who I’m getting to do it. 

[Anonymous said]: hey bud, x421 here, again, might be already fixed because thats from no haven .903, but i recently had the witch queen super rare quest, you might want to proof read the quest and results, there are a few typos. i really did enjoy the writing nonetheless, just a quick question about that quest, as far as i understood this one, you only change your odds of the final result depending on how good you do on your way to the final, but the reward in the end only depends on the final result? 1/2

2/2 it just dawned on me that its been a while since you made an Q&A post so i guess i ll go and lurk on the tfgames forum in the next days, just one last question: i asked early in development about camp upgrades and you were not that convinced about that stuff, i understand you want the slaver camp as some bandit camp and not some castle/bastion or whatever, but since you added camp upgrades, maybe add proximity to a certain region? or something to spend supplies and gold in a 13month+ run?

- Hah! Okay will give it another read through.That’s correct yes. There’s also rewards on the way if you Critical those parts. 

There is a new gold sink coming soon in an upcoming update. I’ve also got plans for more camp upgrades coming later. 

[From the Patreon]: I'm that guy you replied to about the patch notes in Q&A 101. Solid updates. Bugs in the outfit system has driven me nuts since like, 2015, has it been that long already? I think it has. I like collecting them and something always blows up. This time, I ended up with a slaver wearing both the ooze outfit and ponygirl outfit. So there's that. Also I was disappointed the new Quicker then You'd Like wasn't interactive. Solid in any case though, thanks!

- I'll get them all one day I swear! Don't suppose you remember the chain of events that led to that? New QAYL was a patron requested one with the idea of having a big pay off for playing submissive which often involves playing sub-optimally.

[From the Patreon]: 1-ive been noticing when you choose to repick choices for an slave training assignment the slave gets added to the list of choices 2-also just how rare is the post-slave princess city assignment, cause i can never seem to get it even after selling multiple slave princesses 3-another thing is that the nightly puppet-leader stat is almost impossible to get again(either that or i have bedwarmers incapable of usurping me even thought i my current stats mean i couldnt win against even the subbiest slave)

- Will check 3 as you've not been the only person to mention that. 2 I know exists for sure as other people have definitely got it. Should be no rarer than any other rare City assignment, and thanks for the spot on 1.

[From the Discord]: Top 3 Animes of the 2010 to 2020

Mahou Shoujo Madoka★Magica the series was staggeringly good. Just redefined what anime could be to me. Film is a... well it was a thing. A beautiful thing with an ending which I still quite know how to feel about. 

Shirobako. It’s about creativity, craft, and about how people can come together to make something. It might not be something good, but dangit it’s been made and that’s worthwhile. It’s also from personal experience by miles the most accurate depiction of working in an office I’ve ever seen.

Oh man this is very very hard deciding on the third so pick one of the following and I could probably make a strong case for it. 

Kobayashi-san Chi no Maid Dragon, Darling in the FranXX (yes really, yes even the ending), Lupin III: Part 5, Kill la Kill, Monster Musume, Flip Flappers, Demi-chan wa Kataritai, Zombieland Saga, or Kaguya-sama wa Kokurasetai.

Also while I was taking the question to mean series both Your Name and Promare are absolutely phenonemal films. 

[From the Discord]: Best recent Eurovision Act

Lena. Always Lena. 

[From the Discord]: What's the agricultural technological level of No Haven like 

It’s not hit industrialization yet. What makes the difference is and allows cities like Aversol and even bigger to exist is that the organization of the human empire is far better than it has any right to be for the other levels of development being able to keep an incredibly complex supply chain constantly flowing even if on the ground level it barely seems to be moving at all. There are also some much, much larger farms both on the Great Plains and further to the north compared to the much more isolated single/couple of households ones that your slavers raid. 

[From the Discord]: What have been some of your all-time favourite assignments, both in terms of working on them and how they turned out?

Love When Week’s End Comes for a recent one. Writing all the results in colour commentary (and all the variations for weather, events and outcomes) was a real challenge and I do like how it came out. 

Witch-Queen and Arisin’ for being the first times I tried to go for a different, more potentially disturbing/freaky mood, and I’m pleased with the results. 

Sable Masquerade as I really like the ‘bad end’ I came up with. Actually I like the whole thing as while the pitch from the patron obviously helped, a lot of it was inspired by a random superhero bondage party picture I saw on HF, which I decided to run with, and had a bunch of fun exploring. 

[From the Discord]: Weirdest bug and most difficult bug

The one that resulted in a male wisp riding a griffon was a fun one. 

Most difficult has to be the clothing management which as a previous question suggests I’ve still not entirely solved. 

[From the Discord]: If No Haven was an MMO, what race/class would you play?

Kreen rogue mainly as I really like the edit I did for the portrait which MidnightonMars later translated into a commission. 

If not definitely a lamia. 

[From the Discord]: Knowing what you do now about the design of the game, are there any game mechanics you wish you'd have implemented differently?

Clothing management. So very much clothing management. I’ve redone it entirely twice now, and it’s still not where I want it to be. 

[From the Discord]: What was your inspiration for creating the setting of No Haven?  Has the direction the game has gone varied from your initial idea? If so what has been the biggest change?

- It started off with adapting the chan game Deeper Dungeons which was basically a certain popular mmo with nothing different about it outside of it being porn along with some possibly unwise options of personal abuse. I first changed it by ditching gnomes for neko which to my mind was a clear upgrade. There even used to be an examine refference in the RAGS version to suggest they’d been in the region of the dungeons before being driven out.

Then it was a gradual process of adding with the occasional subtractions to get it closer to a more Warhammer feeling setting which has always been a major love of mine when I was still doing Whorelock’s in RAGS.

With No Haven it was a case of building on what I’ve done there and expanding upon that with the race lore and assignment descriptions. Biggest was probably when I did the favoured/unfavoured stuff and added a ton of extra backstory to various races to justify the choices made there. 

[kawaiianimeredhead]

Oh right I wanted to rant. Im still on my phone so there might be typos but oh well

Edit: this got way longer and rambly than I expected oops. I hope this read more works, i never actually checked yesterday when I used it to see if it still worked on mobile so if it doesnt oops and sorry

Anyways. In september a new company took over our contract and thats a whole rant on its own. The previous lead (my dad but not important) left before the new company came and he left Sam in charge. Sam has been there for like four or five years and he's a pretty good guy. When the new cobtract started he was very quickly overwhelmed with the bs and also with the paper abd computer stuff he had to do so he stepped down. Hes still there and actually was still in charge for a bit after he stepped down because we didnt have a new lead.

And now we do have a new lead. This was apparently a Process from what ive heard. Nobody really wanted the job and im not sure how the Boss from the company even went about hiring but i heard that a couple people he considered weren't interested and then I was told that someone was hired or was going to be hired and quick before she even started. I heard these from two differenr people because one told me she qas being walked around and woukd start soon and another said she wasnt coming a day or so later. Someone was hired though and the first night he was there so was the Boss showing him around kinda. I spoke with him a bit and he seemed nice. Def better than the Boss who I cant stand beinf around for long hes got weird and annoying vibes around him.

None of this is actually particularly relevant or necessary for this rant but it came out anyways.

So this new lead has tried all thr different shifts/jobs out and and has been with us for like a month or so now maybe? The first schedule he was properly scheduled on was such a SHIT week/schedule because I went from working 5-4 days a week to 3 and instead of doing bathrooms which is 3 hours or 4 depending on if I'm also doing trash to working 2 hours one day, 2 or 3 the next, and 3 or 4 the last. And it sucks. Then, the first schedule to come out that he made (with the help of the Boss) had ALL of us on less days and hours and HE now working every day but one and working both in the morning AND at night. Now I'm not convinced this was soley his decision because I know he made this schedule with the Boss and i have a suspicion that the Boss encouraged him or persuaded him or some other kind of bull shit to do the schedule like this. And then the week after was the same schedule copied again and this week coming up is the same minus a few small changes.

Now all this is annoying and bull shit on its own but not even the main fuel to this rambling rant. With this schedule, hes scheduled to clean the bathrooms and trash every day except Sunday, which is when I am scheduled on them. Last week was the first week of this and besides the day I'm specificed to do bathrooms im not given a specific job. Imbonly told to do "extras" so ive asked Sam and hes told me to do offices one day and some windows the other. I come in Saturday ready to do the windows which ive been dying to do because they look awful and they used to be my Thing so I get really annoyed about them often but then I notice the trash hadnt been done. So I start doing that thinking maybe that was what I was supposed to be doing. Then while doing this I notice the main breakroom doesnt look particularly clean, breakrooms are a part of the bathroom persons job. This was annoying but because it wasnt Bad I left it. I then go to the next break room which is smaller and always messier because more people stay in it for longer, this one also looked dirtier than it should be. In addition, the bathroom's trash hadnt beeb taken out which is a part of the bathroom job. Bathroom trash is separate from trash trash as far as jobs go, theyre usually done together but if someone is doinf "extras" and someone else bathrooms, bathrooms normally gets bathroom trash abd extras the rest. Something felt really off about the bathroom as well and combined with the breakdowns I had a suspicion that bathrooms hadnt been done. So I decided to check the costumer bathrooms for their trash and their cleanliness. When I got there they absolutely had not been done. Which ! I hadn't planned for. I was taking my time on trash and now I had to do bathroom s.

Nobody had been called or texted about the lead not being at work. And he absolutely has our numbers. We used to sign in on a time sheet and that would have helped us noticed but we recently got a finger print time clock which, as far as I know, we cant check other peoples hours on. So we had no fucking clue he just hadnt been in the previous night.

Then this week comes along. Friday talking with Sam he mentioned something along the lines of not checking the bathrooms. Mentioning that its not really our fault if we dont abd they havent been done because since were not scheduled for them, we have no reason to assume they wouldnt be done. So I hadnt looked in the bathrooms but I did notice the break room looked a bit messy and which had me a bit concerned about a repeat of the previous week. But I didnt wanna do them and I knew Sam didnt either so I left it be but texted nick to ask if hed seen the lead the previous night. Nick confirmed hed been in and was seen cleaning the bathrooms. Yesterday, I briefly looked into the main break room and it looked not great, and then later I went to the bathroom in the smaller breakroom's bathroom (they have really nice soap they buy themselves thats not really importantto this tho) and noticed that one looked AWFUL. It absolutly hadnt been swept and I felt bad but it wasnt what I was scheduled for so I just kinda left it... Their bathroom also had 1ply toilet paper in it, which is what we had when the company first took over it its AWFUL everyone complained so we switched but the unused rolls are still in our closet. Nobody told our new lead this so he had put some of this in the bathrooms. Then later on in the morning, I noticed several trash cans had stuff in it. Not trash but like residue from trash? Like sticky spots of soda oe coffee, some gum, things like that. Basically things that pointed to him only dumping out the trash and not changing the bag. The bags dont always get changed everyday, thats not really an issue, but if theres something still kinda in them they normally are changed because thats gross and why would it just be left like that... I also noticed that up front by the entrance door none of the trash had been got. The busiest area for trash (from customers) and it was still ! There! And I had actually heard Friday or last Friday that this wasnt the first time. Again I left it because I had other things to do.

Now this morning. I worked bathrooms and trash. Trash went ok, I changed a lot of the bags becsuse I prefer to do it regardless and it was just normal overall. Then bathrooms. The bathroom cart is a mess. Which started my mood. The top is all unorganized and theres dirty water in the mop bucket. When I went go get new water, I had set the mop off to the side assuming it had already veen run out and dried because it had been in the part of the bucket where you ring it out and it had been there since yesterday morning. I finished filling the bucket and then look over and notice the puddle forming under the mop because my assumption had been wrong and worse, it smelled like pee. ! Carring on The first two bathrooms were ok, not great but fine. Then I got to the main breakroom and noticed itd clearly been cleaned, Sam worked the day shift Saturday so I assume he swept and mopped. I also swept and mopped. Then, the small break room. Sam didnt clean this one. Which is fair on his part because I think throughout the whole day at least one or more people are sitting in it with no time for someone to clean. So I start and its just the whole thing, even the bathroom floor, was so bad. Aside from the floor the bathroom part was ok, but the floor really didnt seem to have been swept. And the main floor absolutely hadnt been swept. This was obvious from the start but it kept making me madder and madder as I swept and saw how much trash was on the floor. It absolutely put me behind because I wanted to get as much as I could. The cutomer bathrooms also looked pretty bad which is had to tell who thats on, but wheb I got to them it was apparent somethibg else I hadnt fully thought of as a problem until then. Behind all the toilets, like on then but behidb the seat part, there was so much DUST. I had noticed before in the other bathrooms but didnt really think about it because of things plus i see the dust more often collect in the orher bathrooms than that one for some reason and I didnt even realize this but because it was something New in the costumer bathroom it was really noticeable now. Which made ne even madder. Its not hard to clean, were supposed to be cleaning the toilet seats anyways so getting just behind them isnt anything!

And its just so aggrivating. The longer at work i was this morning the more it pissed me off. Especially because in addition to what I was seeing, the things I had heard from others over the last couple of weeks started piling on.

With my own eyes i had seen how bad the cart had been and from sam I heard that the water in the bucket had been in there all week, he suspected that he wasnt changing it. He also commented on the rags all over the cart thinking that he wasnt using paper towels to clean and instead used the rags. I heard about how a couple of times now hed forgotten or ignore the front trash cans and some others. I heard from someone in the meat room that when he cleans it he doesnt do that grear a job and even broke a couple small things. Which is all very concerning to hear since thats a fucking sanitation issue!? And I heard from nick yesterday that he thinks that the lead isnt cleaning all thw bathrooms every day and is instead only cleaning them when they look dirty. Which I'm a bit inclinded to believe because the underside of some of the seats seemed much dirtier than id expected.

And its all infuriating! The Boss is the one who showed him all the jobs, none of us showed him any of what we do it was all the Boss. So like, did HE tell the lead not to do this or that? To do some of it to save time? I dont know but some of it is common sense regardless of what hes beeb told hes still fucking it up and hes our fucking boss. And the main one doing everything!

The store hasnt looked as clean from the start of this new contract and now it's even worse and its awful!

And I dont have a way to end this rant it got really long snd feels like it needs a good closer but I dont have one...

[ofphcenixes]

BLUE & LIBBY - text thread 001

texts from 3:55pm to 7:01pm

blue

hey lib. (: havent talked today. just wanted to drop in and see if u were doin alright i have memes if u need them

libby

i mean, technically we did talk. i reminded you of the moment the world stood still: when valentine and you made contact (1) time. are you okay though? you seem a little, weird

blue

i maintain that valentine was an alien in a spider suit that wanted to destroy me but u know what I mean djdjdjd just chats between us. the gc has been a june holden fest lately lmao hope it works out for them tho anyways i am always weird in ur eyes djdjhd. but im fine. shit was crazy that night and we never really got to talk about what happenedand if u wanted to talk i just want u to kno im here ABOUT NADIA bc yeah kdjdjjd

libby

don't talk to me or my son ever again yeah, wow, okay so holden stayed over the night. i only know that because i saw his stuff in her room? i think she mentioned that like, it was a one time thing but i feel like... he might be coming over again which.. is Interesting oh. yeah, no i think i'm okay. i guess just in shock. june is very broken up over it, so i'm doing my best to be a good pal, and bring loads of ice cream and kisses. /: do you wanna talk? about nadia? i know that she like, meant something to you

blue

ok good luck getting me to stop talkin to u but as for valentine? bye Felecia! is that right. hmm well he doesn’t seem like much is goin on so maybe they were just,, hanging out. bringing a bag over is pretty damning tho. and if he does come over and u see him tell that bih he owes me $ bc he ate my fucking chorizo salad ): r u proud lib?? I ate a salad by choice well I would have if Holden wasn’t a lil birch bitch DONT CENSOR ME fuck. im sorry. ): i actually wanted to see june today tbh. but if u need anyone pls let me know alright? id skip practice if u needed me, lib WELL. i mean ok i was sorta close with her in middle school and she’s always been a friend and I just. I’m just fucking numb tbh. I really can’t believe it

libby

i'll have you know that valentine died shortly after my 18th birthday so ): idk idk, why would they hang out in her room if they were "hanging out"? like they have history. i feel like thats, a little too ... suspicious given the context. in a good way though. like i hope it works out theyre both so miserable without each other. oh my god!! look at you go! so proud of you, dude! ( even if you never got to it lmao ) no, no, it's okay. june needs all the support she can get, and i don't wanna impede. i'm really fine, i just sort of need to accept it and i guess reflect on how terrible it is. she was a really sweet person and fuck i really cant believe any of it i guess

blue

fuck what kdjdjdnd I thought valentine just yeeted shit that’s not a good way to put it fuck but. im sorry lib ): ok I take it back Valentine was alright. still scared the fuck out of me tho all i know is that if i loved someone as much as holden loves june, i wouldn’t let you go **THEM fuck Damn phone Typos Djdjhdi can’t believe u make me eat green stuff its truly CRUEL whomst? I only know nadia just didn’t fucking deserve any of this. shit even daisey didn’t. i just want to protect everyone and i don’t know HOW it goes without saying that im happy to be ur uber driver for the indefinite future

libby

no omg, i took good care of my boy. idk what happened, they can live up to like 15 years so i was pretty bummed tbh. i was a bad mom he appreciates your support from the grave though i mean, i guess. but not everyone you love is going to love you back, i think that's where holden's at. not everyone wants to be clung to, and june seems reluctant besides, you know all about that. holden, the love of your life, loves june. how sad it's good for you!!! i'm helping i ... feel so badly for both of them. i can't imagine how their families must be feeling, fuck. i hate this. i'm moving to spain ah, dude you don't have to do all that. you probably are busy with practice, and holden, and work. thank you tho

blue

im sure ur a great mother. ): but still valentine was lucky to have u. and im sure he misses u in his weird spider heaven web of flies and whatever it is spiders like idk ill dm peter parker and find out i mean... guess that’s true. I suppose I dont get to see how june feels most of the time. i just wish they’d talk about it and sort it out at least. they both deserve to be happy holden is the loml that is true aksjjsjd. holden has enough room for both me and june in his heart. so i mean technically i can love someone else too?? but enough about that lmfao you definitely are helping. even coach has noticed dkdjd. making me better without even trying u can’t move without me who’s gonna get me free popcorn ): you’re just as important as practise and holden to me, lib.

libby

god, i miss him. you think the girls would be mad if i bought another one? like, to keep in my room.  i know! they're both obviously still in love, you can tell. i can't wait for them to overcome this and get to be together. also, im grateful for the amount of sleep i'm able to get now that... the room next to mine is less loud welp, i hope you find someone who is willing to share you with holden lol oMG, REALLY? IDK WHY THAT MADE ME IRRATIONALLY HAPPY LOL. WE CAN GET SALAD LATER let's go, we'll go to spain and take on a new identity. we can live along the coast and work in a bakery or something. get a puppy don't show holden that text he might cry. but dsjflk thank you, you're very important to me too. kinda my best pal

blue

u would have to ask. but if you did get another what would u call it? thanksgiving? funnily enough valentine is only a few weeks away. a sign?? i mean fuck ive known holden for years and can confirm he is happiest when he’s with june. when she’s not roasting him at least lmfao. and if my MasterPlan works im afraid things will get bad again djdjdj. I can take one for the team and try to get them to come over here tho - u don’t need to deal with that shit i hope i do too tbh. and who would I want it to be u ask? that’s right. danny devito. LETS NOT GET TOO CRAZY IVE ALREADY HAD THREE VEGETABLES THIS WERK AND ITS ONLY TUESDAY. I think it’s popcorn time 8) bold of u to assume i know where Spain is dkdjdjdjdj well he’s gonna catch on soon enough we spend every day together at this point lol

libby

i was gonna name this one patrick, after st patricks day actually lol. yes you know what's also approaching that is more important? your birthday! i know, it doesnt take a rocket scientist to figure that out. he's v much a relationship kinda dude, actually bc he's also kinda slutty lol. but even june is sad and its just, SO HARD. i hate when people are clearly, happiest together are like, nO IM GOING TO PROLONG THE MISERY. i feel like we're in a rom-com. how do we get them back together? i'll let him know. my v-day gift from me to you oooo, should i get the skittles ready too then? popcorn is kinda of a veggie if you think abt it omg, okay well now you can't come with me. offer rescinded. im going with the hot cop lslsfkjdjkldfs i mean its not like we're doing anything weird, so its okay, right?

blue

ur so cute wtf. although if u did do this i hope u know im calling him patrick star. also how the fuck do u tell if its a female or a male spider theyre so small and gross. fuck it is too lol. i dont have any money so im gonna let ppl down on the party front lmao. ud still come tho, right? how can he be both slutty and relationshippy. like not to be weird bc i know hes ur cousin and all dkfjgg but he doesnt.. have people over anymore. unless hes someone learned not to stomp around the house WHICH I DONT BELIEVE. and ha hA im already on plan 384 to get them back together get on my level lmao.  we just gotta force them to spend time together tbh. does that mean i have to give u the hot cop for valentines bc i mean. i would if that's what u wanted but im sure u can do much better than him OH FUCK UR RIGHT OUR WHOLE RELATIONSHIP HAS BEEN A LIE TO CONVERT ME TO VEGGIES HASNT IT r u breaking up with me? well fine, ill take the dog ): it's... it's not weird unless we make it weird. and we haven't. have we?

libby

fdsjfjdsl shhhhh, back at you. Patrick Star will be his full name, i promise you this much. as for gender idfk, i am honestly assuming its pronouns lol. i'd be sued by the LGBT community if they knew. also dude, of course. i'll make you cupcakes. plus i know what i wanna buy you! i  can't wait dude what? really?? i thought he was seeing people this whole time, holy shit. dude he's really messed up over this huh? wow, okay, we need to kick this into high gear and have them get back together. tell me your plans. omg, no you clown. i don't even like him that much, he's just pretty. i do like... some personality and he has 0 GOD MY PLAN HAS BEEN FOILED. I CANT BELIEVE IT like i'd ever let you take the dog. she's mine sdfjlkdsfjlk iDK DUDE. I MAY HAVE MADE IT WEIRD BUT WE'RE BAD AT TALKING ABT STUFF, SO WE DONT HAVE TO LOL.

blue

do spiders even have gender i thought they were just the minions of evil lmfao lib u rly dont have to get me anything, really. altho now im curious tbh. but get ready for me to get a lit gift in june >:) ill even wrap it myself which says a lot bc i cant wrap for shit but i want it to be personal lmao not many that im aware of atm. will give u info is this changes. huh we r spies lib. >:) but i dont have any current plans except trying to force them to go in a photo booth together or something when we eventually go to the arcade djsjdh omg how did u know. but idk everyone speaks about him like hes gOD he’s just a dude. eyebrows on fleek tho I will say that IM SO HURT UD USE ME LIKE THIS LIB. ALL THIS TIME WE WERE GETTING CLOSE AND U WERE ONLY HERE FOR THE VEGGIES so u get Spain AND the dog. what do I get, sadness ???? you haven’t made it weird lib, i promise. not to me, anyway. maybe we both wanted the same thing. maybe. oR MAYBE NOT LMFAO but yeah we can talk about whatever lol

libby

don't talk about nate like that omg! i want to, plus its a surprise so no asking what it is. also wow i cant believe you remember my birthday, lol. you dont have to get me anything. you can buy me an ice cream though oh my gOD THAT'S BRILLIANT! aw, what if they take one of those cute kiss pictures in the photobooth like in the movies? i can't wait for them to love each other again, they're so cute. are you jealous that no one is talking about your eyebrows? you have nice eyebrows and nothing to be jealous abt GOD, IM SO SORRY. ROY HIRED ME. HE WAS WORRIED ABT YOUR HEALTH. IM SORRY YOU HAD TO FIND OUT THIS WAY. I THOUGHT YOU NEVER WOULD /: you get the memory of what we were to keep you warm right, cool. noted

blue

why do u talk about the string bean all the time i know u grew up with him but seriously he's like a pale pipe cleaner that i dont need in my life ofc i remeber ur birthday lib. dont u remember ur 10th?? probably the best day of my life lmao. and if u get me something i get u something thats how this works as long as june doesnt say anything mean and holden say anything stupid, its a pretty solid plan tbh. im not jealous HOW DARE ROY PLAY ME LIKE THIS. cant believe u betrayed me lib, after all we've been through ;-; but what if i want something to sell off now that u took the house oh fuck lib i didn't mean it like that. just... pretend i said nothing ok and. yeah talk about something else

libby

hey sorry, i gotta go. talk tomorrow.

blue

oh is everything ok? but alright talk tomorrow then i guess bye lib

libby

night

blue

its 6pm lib but okay night

blue

lib if i did something u dont have to tell me but pls know i didnt mean it, whatever it was. i hope youre okay. but i wont bother u again i promise. just. yeah

libby

it's okay, dude. i'm fine. it's honestly my own fault, it's not you. you're always great. i'm sorry. it's fine

blue

i dont understand what ur talking about but i can tell u dont want to so ill just... leave this. but you're always great too lib. the greatest, in fact. just let me know if ur still coming to the arcade later or not yeah

libby

i guess i'll go. i like pacman.

blue

if u... if u change ur mind i understand. but i really hope u can make it.

[wooyoung-a]

HERE WE GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

contains spoilers !! if ever you're reading my feedback before vae's fic anyway READ IT NOW or your pillows are warm both sides every night ;)

first and foremost i apologize for the inconsistency of my grammar , conjunctions and everything else related and most importantly typos because i still have tears in my eyes and my heart is still aching bc changmin crying is tattooed in my head

i literally opened my desktop bc THE APP KEEPS ON CRASHING

will rb this rant on my writing blog too bcz

OKAY

OKAY

OKAY

this will be long wtf

ok

so

ok

i cant form the words i need to be able to describe the feelings i felt in this

definitely something that deserves all the hype in the teasers and dont mind me not using caps YOU KNOW how i feel

its funny that my head can't comprehend reading these days and i havent even read my books for college but i managed to read this one and maybe i'll read a few more to aid the heartache i got from this one

VAE,,,,,,,,,,,,, you have worked so much for this fic and i can't be more thankful for you for bringing this out to the world

and i am just so so so so so proud of you and i hope you know that

can you believe 40k words???? in a span???????? of a few weeks????? because i'll be honest i can't do that

but how much did you love this fic sm and how inspired were you that you spurt this much effort on a fic??? i wouldn't know. but i know that everything that you and this fic and all your other works are getting now is that you deserve it. every single ounce of recognition, notes, feedbacks, YOU DESERVE IT

you might not realize that yet but i am here to remind you of that

anyway back to kidult

i sent you an ask about it but REALLY i HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATE kids so much

they annoy me to death

but reading this??????? WANTS ME TO BUILD A DAYCARE RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW RIGHT THIS SECOND

the dynamics were all shown so much whether it was tbz kids x tbz kids or tbz kids x yn or tbz kids x chang

but what i loved most of course was hyunjae x changmin

i mean i wouldn't have ever guessed that all throughout the fic we'll be focusing on just one kid and then the rest is yn x changmin but

it made everything and yn's and changmin's relationship more connected WHICH made the death hurt a lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lot more

and the ending <///////////////3

I HATE TO BEAK IT TO YOU BUT i can really imagine hyunjae and the other tbz faces as kids in this one asdjklajl

SO WHEN HYUNJAE SOBBED SOBBED SOBBED when that mf left him in the daycare IN HIS BDAY WTF and when this bitch changmin left at the end ,.,,,,,, MY HEART IS IN SHAMBLES

i really dont think theres much more to say but again, for the nth time, i wont ever get tired of saying this but your works are masterpieces.

they really strike to the heart if it needs to, melt your heart and everything that needs to be felt.

THIS WAS NOT DRAGGED ON TOO MUCH. if anything this was such a nice flow ???????????? I MEAN ????????? i didn't even realize i was reading a 40k fic

everything was just so so so well written and ofc i noticed the part where the line gave was there too

WAIT

WAIT LEMME JUST

THERE'S THIS ONE LINE THAT STRUCK ME LEMME JUST THINK

IT PASSED MY HEAD FOR A SECOND WHAT THE FUCK WAIT

He wishes there was more to read, more to hear from you, but this is the most he’s ever going to get.

THAT ONE literally had to scan the whole fic again and i managed to cry again because i STILL see images of changmin and hyunjae crying

THAT LINE HIT HOME

okay anyway

i cant explain it but here

the wc for fluff = the amount of angst

DID YOU GET IT AJSKDNAKJ

IMMA TRY TO EXPLAIN ANYWAY

EVEN THO THE AMOUNT OF FLUFF >>>>>>>>>> IS SOSOSOSO MUCH GREATER THAN THE ANGST ,,, like angst happened in a second

IT BALANCES

YA GET ME

IT BALANCES!!!!!!! THE AMOUNT I MELTED FOR CHANGMIN X KIDS X YN IS THE AMOUNT I HURT FOR CHANGMIN X HYUNJAE X YN AT THE END

and it makes me wonder now that i've typed that out

what are the other tbz kids reactions when............................... <///////////////////////////////3 LITERALLY NO WHY DID I THINK OF THAT IT HURTS SOSOSOS MUCH MORE NOW

vae you have officially put a scar on my heart that will never heal

i just kep on blabbering now but i have more to blabber

that mf

SHE CALLS HIMSELF A MOTHER WTF

okay so

when hyunjae kept on sneaking on yn

i had an idea that maybe this would happen like hyunjae sneaks out from his mother and then anything happens

THEN

suddenly it was changmin holding hyunjae AND MAYBE i thought they were the ones going to die

that driver just ,,,,, !!! why didn't he turn towards the mother /j ??!?!?!?!?

im enraged when i say i hate that mother

hyunjae doesnt deserve anything he's been treated at home <///3

it still hurts vae

how ,,,

im just ,,,,

good morning ,,,, i guess ,,,,, good evening ??? good afternoon ????

everythings just <///3

watch me wail to sleep

watch me not listen to my physio class today

watch me be crying for changmin and the boyz whenever i see them

WHEN I SAID TRY ME I DIDNT KNOW YOU'D GO THAT HARD

i regret it

i regret saying iw as ready

i wasnt ready

THINKING OF IT ,,,,,,,,,

what if i relate this fic to my hyunjae fic hmm

ANYWAY that's such a wishful thinking i wouldn't want to alter your beautiful wonderfully created fic

overall this was such another surge of emotions

something i'd love to read again BUT only if i'm already heartbroken

not when i'm fully functioning

i hope you're having a nice sleep after hurting us

again

i just want to say

thank you for creating this and for pouring so so so much effort in this. i hope you know how much i'm proud of you for pulling this off and i know it will reach milestones you deserve. you're an amazing writer and i'm so glad you believed in yourself. thank you also for constantly telling me how you feel about the fic and i can't be more than touched that you trust me with trying to cheer you up.

i love you

but at the same time i hate you for hurting me

^that was a joke

i love you,, the only one i hate is hyunjae's mother and father

i didn't really give a feedback didn't i ???????? BECAUSE YOU DONT NEED IT

this was just a rant and i know im sorry ))):

aight imma head to sleep with tears in my eyes and with a broken to pieces heart

KIDULT 2/2 | J.CM

꒰ synopsis ꒱ changmin always believed he was never fond of children, especially when he took the job at your daycare. little did he know the child in him was playing hide and seek, finally revealing itself after growing to love the kids. oh, and you too

꒰ pairing ꒱ daycareworker!changmin x genderneutral!reader

꒰ genre ꒱ strangers to lovers, daycare au, slow burn, fluff, angst, features hyunjae and the rest of the boyz as children

꒰ warnings ꒱ children, car accident, major character death, descriptions of blood, sprinkled bits of profanity and capitalization, and an overall merry bad ending

꒰ word count ꒱ 41.2k+ ( 14.3k+ )

꒰ perspective ꒱ 2nd person omniscient

‘ playlist two ›› spotify, youtube

‘ author's note!! 🍃 — this fic is for @junjungsunwoo 's merry bad ending collab!! biggest thanks to @pjmaparty , @fullsunfluff , @bbanghoonie , and @heejojo for beta reading!! this is the second part out of two <3

‘ taglist ›› @nilesig @reniqt @sunfics @wooyoung-a @kimaya2209 @frickyratz @deputyjuyeon @stealanity @hwallswrld @kyu-rious @changminurheart

NAVIGATION | TBZ MASTERLIST | PART ONE

The jingle from the front doors makes your ears perk, rushing out the playroom and into the entrance. The sight of Changmin never fails to bring a smile to your face, and you immediately wrap your arms around his waist, greeting him with a kiss on his nose.

“You’re here later than usual.”

He sets down his umbrella after closing it and returns the kiss by pressing one onto your cheek. “It’s only 6:10am, dummy. I was struggling to find my umbrella.”

“It just felt way longer since Hyunjae has been here for an hour.”

The statement causes Changmin’s smile to vanish, his lips being slightly parted due to the shock.

But before you allow him to speak, you release him from your hold, dragging him inside the playroom to say hi to the eight-year-old.

“Teacher Changmin!!” the boy squeals, dropping his pencil onto the table before running over to the taller male, engulfing him in a life threatening hug. “I was so bored.”

The statement makes you scoff loudly, standing by your desk as you watch the two. “I said we could watch a movie if you wanted to.”

Hyunjae happily allows himself to be brought into Changmin’s arms, giggling at how he’s now taller than you. “We can’t watch a movie without popcorn.”

Changmin nods, shifting his gaze from Hyunjae over to you. “He’s right, you know. No movie is ever good without popcorn.”

All of a sudden, the male gasps loudly, remembering the plan he had for the day. “Hyunjae, want to go shopping with me? Let’s get some popcorn.”

“Shopping?” Hyunjae’s eyes light up, struggling to remain still in Changmin’s arms after hearing the suggestion. “Shopping??” he repeats.

“Yes, shopping.” Changmin laughs at Hyunjae’s enthusiasm, the corner of his lips tugging slightly upwards. “Teacher Y/N can’t come though.”

He looks over at you, fully expecting your eyebrows furrowing at his response.

“Why can’t I come?”

“The daycare’s opened, remember?” He sets Hyunjae on the ground, urging him to clean up his belongings. “We’re going to be gone for a while.”

“I’m assuming you’re not just going to buy popcorn, are you?” A frown makes its way to your face, slowing your breathing in the process.

“Perhaps.”

You sigh, not wanting to question him any further. You know Changmin has his reasons; he always does, and regardless of what explanation he gives you, you’ll still have to stay within the daycare to look after the other boys.

“You’re going to miss what I have planned for this morning, though…” Your words trail off, your gaze falling to the ground. It’s an understatement to say that you were excited for what you had planned, especially since it relates to one of your ‘dates’ in the past.

“We won’t be gone for long, okay? I’m just going to be stealing him for a few hours.” He cracks a smile and goes to stand in front of you, taking your hand in his. Changmin easily reassures you with a kiss on the lips while his thumb unconsciously rubs the back of your hand. “We’ll be back before you know it.”

Feeling his plump lips gently pressed against your fingers is what convinces you to let him go for the time being, nodding. “...Okay okay, don’t take too long. I’m going to miss the two of my favorite boys.”

“We won’t.” A cheeky smile is brought to his face when he goes back in to kiss you once more, subtly linking his pinky with yours. “We’ll miss you more.”

The kiss would’ve lasted longer if Hyunjae didn’t finish cleaning as fast, running over to Changmin with a loud ‘I’m done!’.

“Have fun, okay?” You wave Hyunjae goodbye as Changmin picks him up again, walking the two outside the daycare.

//

“My butt hurts,” Hyunjae whines, desperate to leave the car.

“A thirty minute ride is not that long,” Changmin mumbles, unbuckling the boy out of his seat.

“Yes it is!” he counters, stretching his limbs. “If my butt hurts, that means the car ride was long!”

“Your butt is fine.” Changmin gives Hyunjae’s butt a gentle pat after helping him out of the car, closing the door shut behind him.

“We could’ve just walked to get popcorn,” he huffs.

Changmin looks up at the sky, glad they no longer need an umbrella due to the rain lessening immensely. He takes Hyunjae’s hand into his, tightly holding onto it as they cross the street over to the line of stores. “We’re not only here for popcorn, you know.”

“Then why are we here?” Hyunjae asks, looking up at the male.

“To buy a special something for a special someone.” A smile grows onto Changmin’s lips when he gives the explanation, not including any more hints for the sole purpose of wanting the boy to figure it out himself.

It finally clicks when Hyunjae is brought to the outside of a jewelry store, shaking Changmin’s hand aggressively while jumping up and down. “Are you buying a ring for Teacher Y/N??”

Changmin laughs, pushing the door open for the two to enter. “Bingo.”

Hyunjae bites back a squeal, letting go of Changmin’s hand to run over to the shelves of rings displayed behind glass panels.

Changmin heads over to the counter, greeting the worker with a warm smile before explaining his situation. Meanwhile, Hyunjae is busy roaming around the store in awe at the amount of diamonds he was seeing. Constant oohs and aahs are heard from the child while the two adults are conversing about the upcoming planned proposal.

“When do you plan on proposing?” the young worker asks, resting her chin in the palm of her hand as she looks at Changmin dreamily.

“Soon, actually. Maybe next week? This kid’s birthday is soon, and I want it to be sort of a gift to him, you know?” Changmin gestures over to Hyunjae before peeking over his shoulder, seeing the eight-year-old on his tippy toes with his face pressed up against the glass.

“That is soon! I hope you find your special ring here, then.” She follows his gaze and spots the boy, her lips forming into an ‘o’. “Is that your son?” she asks, her gaze flickering between Hyunjae and Changmin to see if she could spot any resemblance.

The layer of pink forming on Changmin’s cheeks show how much the question caught him off guard, stutters falling past his lips. “Oh- uh, uhm, n-no, no he isn’t.”

“Teacher Changmin!!” Hyunjae exclaims immediately after, waving to the teacher to come over.

The worker is able to connect the dots after hearing the call and nods, the smile on her lips never faltering.

Changmin goes over to Hyunjae and crouches down by his side, peering into the glass. “What’s up, Hyunjae?”

“Look! That ring reminds me of Teacher Y/N!”

The worker behind the counter joins the two boys, checking to see what the little boy was referring to.

“That one?” Changmin asks, pointing to one of the rings.

Hyunjae shakes his head, adjusting Changmin’s finger by taking it into his own fingers and pointing to the one he was talking about. “That one! The one with the twisty thing.”

Changmin lets out an ‘ah’ at the sight of it, admiring the ring for a few seconds before speaking.

“It’s simple. I like that.”

“That’s our twisted halo ring,” the worker introduces, grabbing the two boys’ attention. “I’d love to bring an extra out to show you if you’d like.”

Changmin puts his hands on his thighs and stands up, nodding. “That’d be wonderful, thank you.”

Hyunjae begins to tug on Changmin’s hand, pulling the teacher back down to his height. “Halo ring??” he whispers.

When Changmin shows his confusion by tilting his head, Hyunjae moves to reach for the paper in Changmin’s back pocket, knowing that it would be there. Ever since he received Hyunjae’s painting from you, he makes sure to always bring it everywhere with him, considering it good luck. Hyunjae only found out about it recently when Changmin flaunted it off one night, saying that the painting is why he won a certain carnival game.

Considering it’s been two years since Hyunjae has painted it, some of the paint has definitely chipped off, but the halo continues to remain on the top of your head, always managing to bring a smile to everyone’s faces at the sight of it.

Hyunjae unfolds it and points to the halo, shoving the painting in front of Changmin’s face. “See? Halo!!”

“Some things are just meant to be, aren’t they?” Changmin sighs, taking the paper into his own hands. He admires it and the little details Hyunjae has managed to add, reminiscing the day he saw it for the first time ever. Little did he know he would actually get to be with you. “Dang, Hyunjae. I can’t believe you painted this when you were six.”

“Can I paint a better one?” he offers. “With a brush? That one looks terrible because I used my finger.”

Changmin ponders the idea, tucking the piece of paper back into his pocket after refolding it. He decides to mess around with the boy, patting his head. “I don’t know, Hyunjae,” he murmurs, cupping his cheek. “This one means a lot to me…”

It hurts his heart when he sees Hyunjae’s face fall, but he keeps up his act, grazing his thumb over his skin.

Shortly after, the worker returns with a box in her hands, placing it onto the counter, and before it could drag Changmin’s attention away, the teacher goes to lean into Hyunjae’s ear.

“A new painting would make a great wedding present, by the way,” he whispers.

And with a wink, he leaves the boy to head over to the counter, unable to stop smiling after seeing Hyunjae’s happy demeanor return.

//

“We’re back!!”

Although Changmin announces it to the class, his eyes are strictly locked onto you. You’re sitting by the teacher’s desk, writing something. You don’t pay attention to him whatsoever, the pen still moving in your hand.

Hyunjae greets the other boys and runs over to Juyeon’s table, joining him and Hyungseo to see what they are doing.

Changmin frowns at the lack of a reaction from you and makes his way over to your desk, but by then, you are hidden, doing something fairly quickly below the desk before revealing yourself to him.

“It’s about time you noticed my presence,” he huffs, setting the grocery bag on the table.

“I was doing something, Jichang.” You roll your eyes and sit up from your seat, eyeing the bag Changmin just sat down. All it has is a box of popcorn packs inside, making you raise a brow. “It took you five hours to only buy popcorn?”

“Let’s just say we got distracted.” He grins, turning his head to face the other children only to realize the amount of flowers within the playroom.

The counters with sinks are decorated with flowers in vases while the rounded tables are full of scattered petals and leaves. The boys are playing with the flowers, some of them making flower crowns while the other ones are sorting the petals into piles by their colors.

Younghoon grins at his finished product and rises from his seat, walking over to Changmin. “I made this for you,” he explains. He brings the linked daisies up into the air, revealing a flower crown with the heads tucked into the stems.

“You made one for Changmin and not me?” you gasp, dramatically throwing a playful fit that Younghoon was surely used to.

“Chanhee is making yours right now, Teacher Y/N. He broke it, so he’s restarting.”

Changmin leans down and tilts his head forward, allowing Younghoon to crown him with the daisies. He gives Younghoon a tight hug and whispers a thank you before waving him off.

“Still can’t believe you got yours first,” you mumble, and Changmin chortles. He leans in to kiss the top of your head, unable to go ten minutes without showering you with affection.

“You’ll get yours soon. Don’t worry, honey.” He tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, humming.

“Honey? That’s a new one.”

“It’s cute. I’ll try to use it more for you.”

You smile, resting your head against his shoulder as you gaze at the boys, all ten of them doing something completely different.

“You know, I was going to have them clean up for lunch, but they all wanted another half hour to finish.” You reach to wrap your fingers around his pinky, holding onto it. “They wanted to wait for you and Hyunjae.”

“What did you have them do? Make flower crowns?” He uses his free hand to play with your hair.

“Kind of.” You look up at Changmin while wearing a crooked smile, one that made his heart burst. “See the vases of flowers on the counters? The boys made those themselves. I actually got a majority of the flowers from the field a few miles away, remember?”

He raises a brow, letting his hand drop to the side. “The one where I got stung?”

“Precisely. Also!!-” You remove your head from his shoulder and move behind your desk, bending down just like you were earlier. You take out a white vase with purple flowers shoved into it, and the sight almost makes Changmin laugh.

“I may or may not have cheated a bit and bought a few extra purple flowers from a nearby flower shop, but I’d say it’s worth it, don't you think?” You smile at the assortment of flowers, but when you turn to look at Changmin, he has a hand over his mouth, truly trying his best to contain his laughter.

“You can laugh, you know,” you sigh, setting the vase onto the table. You fully expected this response from him, especially with how messy the assortment came out to be, so you aren’t at all offended.

“I’m sorry it just- Y/N did you make that?”

“Kind of? The other boys helped me with it, and we all kind of struggled, but purple is your favorite color, right?”

He nods, bringing the vase into his own hands.

“In all honesty, I would’ve fixed it, but the messiness is kind of what makes it- special. It reminds me of how we met too.”

Your sheepish tone softens Changmin immediately, gazing at the flowers. “How so?”

“Well,” you begin, “if you think about it- our first impression of each other wasn’t the best. I thought you were incompetent.”

He shoots his head up to look at you, snorting at the comment. “Then why did you hire me?”

“I was desperate, but that’s not the point,” you grumble, taking the vase from him. “It’s just….the way we met- it’s like, well, it wasn’t perfect, but it...it was real, nonetheless.” You started playing with the petals, running your fingers across the smooth surfaces. “Just like these flowers. They’re not the best looking bunch out there, but they’re real.”

You set the vase aside. “I considered buying fake ones so they would last longer, but I decided against it.” You then look at him. “They look pretty regardless, don’t you think?”

He looks at them and smiles. “They do.”

“But, all that aside, what had you gone for five hours, Mr. Ji?” You look at him skeptically, teasing him through your tone.

He grins, playing along with your words by teasing you in return. “Nothing in particular. Why do you ask?”

“You’re not keeping something from me, are you?” You cross your arms over your chest, pouting.

“Hm...maaaaybe.” He has his arms behind his back, looking at you like a kid that’s hiding a secret from their parents.

“Teacher Y/N!!” Chanhee interrupts, erupting from his seat. He waves the chained daisies in the air. “I finished your crown!!” he yells.

Changmin urges you over to the boy, forcing you to forget your previous conversation.

“Don’t think I’ll forget about this,” you mutter.

“I’ll tell you in a few days, okay? Now go over to him to be crowned the love of my life.”

//

The day has finally arrived, and Changmin’s worry is constantly bubbling up within him, unable to stay in one spot.

While the rest of the kids are in the parking lot, you, Changmin, and Hyunjae are in the playroom to gather last minute items.

Well, only you are doing so.

Changmin is busy pacing around behind you, gaze constantly shifting between the box in his hands and your back turned to him. He’s always been confident in whatever he did, but to be proposing was just on another level Changmin wasn’t used to.

Thoughts flooded his head, clearing his throat every few seconds. You would turn around to see if he was alright, but he would shrug it off, saying that he was just excited for Hyunjae’s birthday.

Hyunjae snorts loudly when hearing Changmin’s lame excuse, leaving the round tables to grab Changmin’s hand. He pulls Changmin away from you and to the other side of the room, explaining that he needed help with putting on the party hat.

He brings Changmin over to your desk, making him crouch down before asking him the question he refused to stop pestering Changmin about.

“You have the ring, right?” he asks, furiously shaking his hand. The excitement radiating off of Hyunjae causes his whisper to be way louder than intended, making Changmin’s eyes widen.

The teacher hushes him, praying that you hadn’t heard what Hyunjae ever so carelessly asked.

He looks at you standing by the sinks, and thankfully you haven’t reacted whatsoever. You are too busy moving around the playroom to even care about what the two were talking about, much less doing, taking the utensils out of the plastic bags you put them in.

“I do, Hyunjae, and no, I’m not showing you for the nth time.” He rolls his eyes, tightening his grip around the navy blue box.

Hyunjae frowns, taking note of the fist Changmin’s creating in his right hand. The teacher grabs one of the party hats off of your desk and snaps it onto the birthday boy’s head, eliciting an ‘ow’ out of him.

“It’s your birthday,” Changmin reminds, booping his nose with his finger.

“Yeah, but-....but still!!” Hyunjae begins to whine, throwing an unnecessary fit.

Throughout the two and a half years of knowing Hyunjae, Changmin learned that Hyunjae doesn’t really make a fit out of anything unnecessary. It was a change from the other boys you two watched over, but it didn’t settle correctly within him.

So despite how loud Hyunjae got with his whines, Changmin could only smile, glad that the boy is comfortable enough to throw a playful fit over something that doesn’t even have to do with him.

He sets the box onto the ground to cup both of Hyunjae’s cheeks, leaning in to press a kiss to his forehead. Being with the young boy really calmed his nerves, especially when he takes the box back into his fingers with ease.

“C’mon Hyunjae, let’s go outside. The other boys have been waiting for you for a while now.” Changmin extends his left hand, wiggling his fingers.

Hyunjae grabs it after sniffing loudly, adjusting the hat on top of his head as the two begin to make their way to the door.

Changmin peeks over his shoulder to look at you, his eyes becoming locked onto your figure. His heart is pounding against his chest as he’s reminded of how today is the day. The day you’ll become more than a tango duo that has been sharing sweet little nothings and kisses for the past two years.

You’re dressed beautifully, as always, but your fits for special occasions never fail to make him extremely flustered, truly taken aback by your beauty.

“You coming, Y/N?” he asks, garnering you attention by amplifying his voice.

“One sec!” you call out, informing the two. You dump the remaining utensils into the paper plates and rush over to the boys with the stack in your hand. You reach out to hold onto Hyunjae’s other hand, looking down at him with a warm smile that has resided on your face. “Excited?”

“More than ever,” he responds, nodding furiously. He then resumes to pull the two of you out the playroom and outside the daycare, harshly tugging onto your hands.

“Let’s go!” the now nine-year-old commands.

With how much Hyunjae is tugging on your hand, it almost makes you drop your plates, and Changmin laughs at how cute you are when you stumble over your feet.

“Careful, Hyunjae,” Changmin warns when beginning to cross the street, constantly looking both ways before allowing the boy to walk over to the parking lot.

Hyunjae continues to lead the two teachers to the nine other boys occupying themselves by the tables in the parking lot, loud music blasting through the speakers you displayed earlier.

Hyunjae releases both of your hands when Youngjae tosses a balloon at his face, charging at the six-year-old when the younger boy cackles.

“Can you lower the music? I’ll light the candles.” You approach him with a gentle kiss to his cheek, setting the plates down by the cake Sangyeon helped you place.

Changmin does exactly as you say, and by the time the music is lowered, you have gotten all nine candles on the cake to light up. Sangyeon is the one who initiates the birthday song, singing it very loudly for others to join in.

And unlike Karaoke Sundays, you join along in the singing, clapping your hands along to the rhythm while you’re watching a bouncy Hyunjae make his way over to the cake.

He blows out the candles once the song ends, causing everyone to clap.

“Should we do cake first or presents?” you ask, letting the birthday boy decide.

“Cake!!” Haknyeon shouts, bringing the attention over to him.

You’re playfully sending a glare towards the interruption while Hyunjae smiles brightly, agreeing. “We can do cake,” he affirms.

As you’re busy cutting the cake, Changmin has unintentionally drifted to the opposite side of the parking lot, resuming his pacing in his spot. His fingers fiddle with the box in his hand, wondering how he should come across this proposal. It doesn’t help that he hasn’t even asked you (much less anyone else) out before, so to be proposing gave him another level of anxiety.

Changmin has already celebrated Hyunjae’s birthday twice in the past, but this one certainly proves different. This one is special. The present he has for Hyunjae is something he’d never be able to outdo in the future years to come, and even Hyunjae knows that.

So it explains why the youngster sprints over to Changmin instead of standing in line for his slice, tugging on his shirt rather aggressively.

“Now??” he whines, practically begging Changmin to get it over with.

Changmin feels his breath hitch in his throat, growing hesitant with every passing second. His mind is running with countless thoughts, unable to organize them. This causes his brain to malfunction, realizing that this maybe wasn’t a good idea after all.

“Hyunjae, maybe-...maybe this isn’t a good idea. I haven’t even asked Y/N out. It’s too early, I don’t think I can do this. I’m- I don’t know, I’m sorry Hyunjae. Maybe another time?”

But Hyunjae completely disregards every word that leaves Changmin’s mouth and reaches for the male’s closed fist. He pulls the teacher’s fingers open to retrieve the box, running away with it in his hold.

Changmin stares at him in disbelief, his arm still being extended outwards with his hand empty of the box. Changmin has been holding onto that box ever since he arrived at the daycare, and for it to be taken from his grasp for more than ten seconds made his heart plummet. He wants to chase after Hyunjae, to take it back, and never show his face again due to the embarrassment shooting up his neck.

Hyunjae’s party hat falls off his head when he reaches you, but he doesn’t care, panting as he reaches to poke your side.

“Hyunjae!!” you yell, flinching at the touch. “You can’t surprise me when I have a knife in my hand,” you frown, setting it aside after handing Haknyeon his rather large slice of cake.

Without saying a word, Hyunjae raises the box into your view by presenting it in the palm of his hands, looking at you with wide eyes.

Meanwhile, Changmin’s suffering in the background, his feet unable to move as he bites on his fist. His mind is constantly running with thoughts of grabbing Hyunjae and tossing him across the world for doing such a thing. He wants to reverse time and never have bought the ring in the first place, the idea of rejection stabbing at his heart repeatedly.

You raise a brow at the sight of the unfamiliar navy box, bringing it into your hold.

Changmin starts to sob internally when seeing you open the box, moving to hide behind one of the set out unfoldable chairs. And just like a kid, he brings his hands over his ears, preparing himself for the worst possible outcome with his knees pressed up against his chest.

But his self-deprecating state doesn’t falter Hyunjae’s smile in the process; if anything, it only made it grow impossibly wider, bright eyes anticipating your reaction.

All the boys have stopped whatever they were doing to look at you, only now realizing what was happening.

Your eyes finally fall onto the ring in the box, and your heart nearly stops in your chest. Although your lips are parted, you’re left with no words to speak.

You have no clue what to feel.

But you know your answer. Your mind is chanting ‘yes’ repeatedly in your head as you think of the future the diamond ring holds, but the most important man is missing from the scene.

You scan the parking lot for Changmin and spot him instantly behind one of the chairs.

If it wasn’t for his white shirt flowing through the breeze, Sunwoo and Youngjae pointing at him definitely gave it away.

With shaky fingers, you close the box. You’re nervous yourself; hell, this is the last thing you were expecting on a day like this. You make your way over to the chair with slow steps, Hyunjae quick to tail after you.

You’re finally able to bring the entirety of Changmin into your view when you approach him. His eyes are closed incredibly shut with his arms wrapped tightly around his legs, slowly rocking back and forth in his spot.

The sight makes you melt in your spot, and seeing him only confirms the fact you want to be with him. You want to be with him until the end, until your very last dying breath, and you need him to cooperate with you. Just like the day Changmin confessed, you are now basically begging for a response from him, wanting to hear that he does want to get married to you.

He senses your presence and peeks an eye open at you, closing it immediately after at the sight of you holding the box.

“Peek-a-boo,” you whisper, removing the chair so you could see him clearer.

You can hear Sunwoo snickering in the background, but it quickly turns into wheezes when Chanhee elbows him in the chest.

Changmin opens his eyes again at the sound of your voice, slowly allowing his gaze to meet yours. He smiles warmly, slightly waving his hand up towards you. “Hi.”

“What are you doing here?” you laugh, grabbing one of his arms to pull him up onto his feet.

He immediately breaks out into incoherent rambles, fixing his dress shirt. “I- uh, well Y/N, heh, you see, uhm...funny story, actually-”

You cut him off by waving the box in his face, handing it to him. “I’m assuming this is yours.”

Changmin drops it like it’s fire, raising his hands up in the air defensively. Hyunjae groans at the teacher’s stupidity, and Youngjae is giggling in the background, shortly joined by Sunwoo and Juyeon.

“I have no clue what you’re talking about!! That- that isn’t mine, uhm, yeah. Who-...who told you it was mine?” His nervous laughter trails off when he scratches the back of his, his cheeks being completely flushed with a bright shade of pink.

“Who knew Teacher Changmin could be this embarrassing?” Haknyeon grumbles, shoving a forkful of cake into his mouth. Sangyeon reaches over the table to slap the blonde boy’s head, telling him to shut up.

You’re sending daggers towards Changmin’s way through your gaze, bending down to pick up the box. Thankfully, you’re easily calmed down by Haknyeon’s comment, laughing to yourself.

Changmin has his hands dropped to his sides, bottom lip caught between his teeth as he eyes the box in your hands. He doesn’t say anything else, knowing the situation will only turn out worse if he utters another word.

Because of this, you understood that this won’t be going anywhere. Changmin will continue to deny his possession being his, and it would be no use just standing there, trying to hand the engagement ring back to him.

So you take matters into your own hands, heart racing as your mind impulsively makes you move down onto one knee.

You certainly weren’t expecting to propose on Hyunjae’s birthday, but regardless of that fact, your hands move on their own accord, opening the box to present the ring to him.

Hyunjae is holding back squeals in the background, you could tell, and he’s grabbing onto Juyeon’s hand, holding it tightly as he anticipates what’s going to happen next.

And with a whisper, you finally ask the awaited question.

“Changmin, will you marry me?”

He, along with the other boys, gapes at your response, and Hyunjae screams ‘YES’, shaking Juyeon by his shoulders.

The smile lingering on your lips shows Changmin that you already know his answer, but you continue to stay on one knee, waiting for a reply.

Changmin feels like screaming, wanting to say ‘yes’ instantly just to reassure you. He wants to pull you up onto your feet and press his lips against yours, keeping you in his arms until the world ends. He wants to scream ‘we’re getting married’ and show you off to the world, but he does none of it as he stands there in shock, growing weak at the ever so pretty sight of your smile.

“Oh brother,” Hyunjae mutters, letting go of Juyeon’s shoulder to run over to the two of you.

He pulls the ring out of the box and knees Changmin’s thighs, getting him to react. “Say yes,” he demands, grabbing his hand to shove the ring onto his finger.

Changmin wheezes out a ‘yes’ in pain, rubbing his thigh as Hyunjae figures out how to get it to fit. The ring was too small for all of his fingers. Well, all but one.

So he slips it onto his pinky finger, giving you a tight hug once you thank him.

He runs back to where he was previously standing, and you get onto your feet, brushing off any dirt that remained on your knee.

You finally look at Changmin and notice the way he’s gazing at the ring. It was meant for you, so to see the ring on his finger only made his mind go dizzier.

Before you could say anything, Changmin looks up and doesn’t hesitate to bring you close against him, linking the pinky with one of yours.

“I’d say yes a million times. Yes, I’ll marry you. Yes, I’ll be your husband. Yes, I’m yours.” He uses his other hand to cup your cheek, making your eyes lock with his. “Holy fuck, I’m yours.”

You laugh loudly, happiness filling up your lungs. You swing your arms around his neck, pulling him in for a quick kiss.

“You’re real,” you whisper against his lips, half hooded eyes looking into his. “You’re real, and you’re mine.”

“I’m forever yours,” he murmurs, “and you’re forever mine.”

That’s the last thing you hear from him before he pulls you into another kiss, pressing a hand up against your back.

//

You have a book in your hands when Changmin exits your bathroom, purposely having his entrance to your bedroom go unnoticed as you continue to ‘read’.

He’s about to flaunt how good he looks after moisturizing when you don’t even spare him a glare, sending him into a pout when he reaches your bed. “You’re not even reading that,” he mumbles.

“What makes you say that?”

“You’re reading it backwards,” Changmin points out, referring to how you keep flipping the pages into the opposite direction. He adjusts his flannel pajamas before joining you on your bed, letting out a content sigh at the fluffiness of your blankets.

“I have powers you’re not aware of,” you hum matter-of-factly.

A ‘hey!’ escapes you when Changmin snatches the book from your grasp, confiscating it for the time being.

He reaches over you to set the book on the nightstand, taking note of the time displayed on the alarm clock.

“It’s-...nine pm, Y/N,” he states before looking back at you. “It’s our first time together in your apartment at this time. I’m not letting you ignore me with a book.”

When you think about his words, he isn’t wrong. For the past year, you’ve been inviting Changmin to stay the night in your apartment whenever it got too late (an example being Hyunjae being picked up in the middle of the night). But otherwise, he’s never been here earlier than 11pm.

The crack of thunder accompanies the silence that washes through the atmosphere, and Changmin moves to bring the blankets over both of your torsos, making sure you’re comfortable. He doesn’t even question your lack of words, knowing you’re thinking about something whenever creases form on your forehead.

He rests on his side with his head propped up onto his hand, waiting for you to notice him staring at you while the rain patters against the windows.

It takes a few minutes before you finally notice him, heat shooting up to your ears when your eyes unintentionally lock with his. He smiles at your shyness, pulling you to lie down with him.

“What are you thinking about, honey?” Changmin has you close to him when he runs his fingers through your hair, fluffing it up.

The pet name never fails to calm you.

“About us,” you respond simply.

“Us?” He helps to untangle the knots in your hair, gently loosening them.

The room is dimly lit, but that changes only for a mere second when the lightning decides to be present. Though, it only adds to your comfort, knowing you’re safe in Changmin’s embrace.

“We entirely skipped the dating stage, didn’t we?”

His movements stutter at your question. “...Kind of? I mean yeah, basically, but I don’t mind.” Changmin pauses, shifting his gaze from your hair and down to your eyes. “Do you?”

You shake your head, pulling his hand out of your hair. “The thing is- I just never really got a chance to call you….my boyfriend.” The last part becomes a whisper, focusing on interlacing your fingers with his.

He gives your hand a gentle squeeze, the sounds of the rain eventually drowning out as he makes you his focal point.

And out of nowhere, he sighs dramatically, letting go of your hand to look at the ceiling. “Alas, it’s a loss.”

You slap his chest for talking like that, a throaty cackle escaping him shortly after. He brings an arm over his forehead, continuing to stare at the ceiling and the shadows of the window panel.

“But honestly? Y/N?” He turns his head to look at you. “I prefer fiancé.”

You giggle at how he’s always managed to be so smooth, rolling your eyes. He goes back to turning his entire body to have it face yours, sticking out his pinky. “Can you believe we’re engaged?”

The question makes you scoff, laughing. “Can you believe we’re going to be married?” you counterattacked, linking your pinky with his. “Us?”

He raises his brows. “Wow, I’m hurt. Personally, I think I look stunning in a suit.”

Your toothy smile shines through the dark when you look at him. “I actually don’t doubt that one bit.”

The playful atmosphere seems to fade when you’re given time to just get lost in each other’s eyes, slowly retracting your pinky from his.

He looks down at his fingers, and reality finally settles in.

“We’re going to get married,” he whispers.

Changmin then realizes there’s something he’s planned on doing yet never did earlier that day, so he gets you to sit up with him. You’re confused, as expected, but you slowly start to understand when he wiggles the ring off of his finger.

He asks for your hand and slowly slips it onto your ring finger, and the added weight takes a toll on your heart. It stops beating in your chest, and only now do you understand why Changmin was looking at his finger ever so lovingly earlier at Hyunjae’s party. This time, you’re the one that’s finally able to admire the diamond and the curves of the ring, finding it absolutely gorgeous.

“When are we going to get married?” you ask, looking up at him. “Where? And our honeymoon? There’s so many things we need to plan-” you pause. “We’re making Hyunjae our best man, no exceptions.”

“Definitely,” Changmin affirms, clicking his tongue. “The boy is one hundred percent mature enough to make an entire speech about our relationship.”

You laugh, agreeing with the nod of your head. “Okay, but seriously, Changmin. How are we going to plan all of this? We’re just- two losers working at a daycare.”

“Two soon-to-be-married losers,” he corrects. He brings you into his lap, allowing you to rest your forearms on his shoulders while he rests his hands by your sides. He then lowers his tone, whispering. “Let’s worry about everything another time, okay? We have so many years ahead of us.”

He continues his rant while his fingers play with the fabric of your shirt. “We don’t have to get married this year or the next. Hell, we don’t have to get married the year after that. As long as you’re always by my side, we’ll be together forever.” He leans in to press a fluttering kiss against your jaw.

“Okay okay,” you murmur, reassured by his words. You bring your hands up to his face, cupping his cheeks, and he immediately falls into the warmth of your palms, an unbearable amount of butterflies forming in his stomach especially when you whisper ‘my fiancé’ before kissing his nose.

The comfortable silence returns, and all you two do is hold each other while the storm crashes down onto your windows. But no single clash of thunder makes either of you two flinch, too lost in each other’s touch to even notice.

“Y/N?” Changmin croaks, voice lower than usual.

“Yes?”

He hesitates, his words coming out breathy.

“Y/N?” he repeats.

“What’s wrong, my love?”

The name causes a smile to bloom onto his face, laughing as he shakes his head. “Nothing’s wrong.”

“So you just like saying my name for fun now?” you tease, squishing his cheeks with your fingers.

The playfulness dials down eventually, and you rest your head against his shoulder with your eyes fallen shut. The tranquility wrapped around the two of you brings Changmin confidence once again, repeating your name for the third time.

“Y/N?”

“Hm?”

“...I lov-”

He’s cut off by your ringtone blaring throughout the bedroom, causing both of your heads to turn to the direction of the noise. You apologize through a murmur after rubbing your eyes, leaving Changmin’s lap to check your phone. You’re immediately kicked out of your tiresome state when you see the caller id, accepting the call.

Changmin watches you curiously, and he doesn’t get a chance to hear a single word from the other line since you brought your phone up to your ear. He shrugs it off as a personal matter but notices how you don’t speak a single word into the call, making him confused when it ends.

Your face is now far from the cheerfulness you were feeling earlier, standing up from the edge of your bed.

“Who was that?” he questions, crawling over to the edge of the bed. “Why were they calling at this hour?”

You toss your phone into his lap and make your way over to the closet in hurried steps, taking out your raincoat.

Changmin grows worried at your silence, and it isn’t until he notices the bright light illuminating from your phone, taking a glance at the caller id.

Hyunjae’s mother.

//

“There he is,” you whisper, freeing yourself from the buckle in Changmin’s passenger seat before exiting the car.

Throughout the entire drive to the daycare, Changmin’s face remained completely void of emotions, his jaw clenched as he sped through the storm.

He slams the car door shut when leaving, and the two of you run across the street without sparing a glance to oncoming cars, racing to the entrance of the daycare.

Usually, Changmin would be complaining about the storm being ever so heavy in the middle of autumn, but with how focused he is on the situation at hand, he doesn’t give one single damn about the rain crashing down onto the two of you.

The boom of thunder doesn’t startle either of you in the slightest; if anything, it was the sight of Hyunjae sitting under the roof of the entrance that makes your heart drop, the boy trying to gain warmth by hugging his legs.

He’s facing the ground until he hears the sound of running footsteps his way, his heart pounding hard against his chest. Maybe it’s a sense of a relief that washes over him when he sees you two, but the tears that were pooling up in his eyes finally rush down his cheeks in streams, breaking the dam that he’s been holding up for so long.

He sobs when you crouch down to his level, quick to pull him into your embrace.

“We’re here, Hyunjae, we’re here,” you murmur.

The warmth of being in someone else’s embrace only makes him cry hard, little fingers clutching onto your wet coat.

After pulling out his keys and unlocking the doors, Changmin nearly breaks the glass doors down when shoving them open, ushering the two of you inside.

He’s the first one to enter the playroom after flicking on the lights, and you pull Hyunjae to the side, making him look at you.

The boy is breaking down in front of you, having his tears fall into the palm of your hands when you cup his cheeks. He’s holding onto your wrists, fingernails digging into your skin as he continues to sob. He’s growing weaker each second, unsure if he’ll be able to stand for any longer.

The sight of seeing your favorite boy like this rips you apart, choking up on your own tears as you do your best to reassure him, reminding him that both you and Changmin are here and that he’s okay.

Through his tears, Hyunjae is looking at you like you’re completely unreal, and his tearful, broken gaze pierces your heart.

Changmin returns with a roll of paper towels and sets them aside before taking Hyunjae from you, one knee on the ground as he makes the crying boy look at him.

“What happened?” he interrogates, showing no sense of pain as he stares at him. Fury continues to boil up within his chest when Hyunjae doesn’t respond, amplifying his voice throughout the daycare.

“What happened, Hyunjae?” he repeats. The question is more of a hostile demand, his fingers wrapped tightly around the boy’s wrist. His tone only makes Hyunjae cry even more, unable to keep himself up for any longer.

You rush over to Hyunjae and take him back into your arms, letting him curl up against your torso while you stare at Changmin.

Changmin doesn’t ease up in the slightest, only growing even more furious as he allows his hands to ball up into fists. His eyes are constantly flickering between Hyunjae and the storm outside, mind running with possibilities of what could’ve happened if you two didn’t get to him sooner.

“M-my m-mommy-” Hyunjae croaks, trying to get words out of his throat before falling right back into his sobs, burying his face in your chest with his fingers bunching up your shirt into a fist.

“That’s it,” Changmin spits, not regretting a single punch of hatred he’s had for Hyunjae’s mother.

“Changmin,” you say sternly in hopes of calming him down, knowing how out of control he could become when unsupervised.

Changmin rises from the ground and makes his way behind the front desk, yanking the drawer open. He flips through the files and comes across the one he wished he never thought he’d have to take out, slapping it onto the desk so hard that it makes your nerves jump.

“Changmin,” you repeat, raising your voice this time.

“No, don’t say another word,” he orders. Just like the storm outside, his voice is thunderous, stinging you with how cold his demeanor had become.

“Enough is enough. How can a mother be so heartless? How could someone leave their son outside an empty building in the middle of a storm?” He flips the file open, scowling. “On his fucking birthday too,” he mutters, pulling out his phone.

He scans the list of phone numbers on the paper before finally catching sight of the one he’s been seeking. Changmin begins dialing in the number, mumbling ‘I should’ve done this two years ago’ under his breath.

You know exactly what he’s doing, and you let go of Hyunjae to stop him from calling Child Protection Services by grabbing his wrist, taking the phone away from him.

“Please,” you beg, desperation present in your tone.

You’re looking at him with eyes he’s never seen before, trying to convince him through your gaze.

But it doesn’t work, and Changmin yanks your arm away just to take the phone back from you. He fails as you continue to hide it from him, eyes frantically searching for a way to have him do otherwise.

Then you give in, remembering all the scoldings he’s given you in the past.

“I’ll talk to her!” you blurted, freezing his actions. “I’ll say something to her, okay? I promise.” You set the phone face down onto the surface of the table, allowing yourself to breathe before continuing. “I’ll work this out with her when she returns. I’ll tell her how this isn’t right, and that we will call if she ever does something like this again. Just for now, let’s just focus on Hyunjae.”

You slip in another ‘please’ after your rant, and it makes him look back at the crying boy in the corner. He looks back at you, and you’re brought to tears yourself, letting one slip down your cheek as you look at him.

So Changmin gives in, finally understanding that Hyunjae deserves to be their first priority at the moment.

The sounds of Hyunjae continuously sobbing is something Changmin has never wished to hear. He allows his shield to lower before rushing back over to him, bringing the trembling boy into his hold. Hyunjae rests his head against his shoulder, having his tears fall onto Changmin’s flannel.

“It’s okay, Hyunjae. We’re here,” he whispers, rubbing his back.

You’ve disappeared into the playroom and come back with a blanket, wrapping it around the two boys after joining them. The warmth and attention brings Hyunjae to ease, his tears lessening as he calms himself down.

Changmin is looking at him with a weak, gentle smile, staying silent when you start whispering little nothings to the boy.

Hyunjae becomes mentally capable of explaining what’s happened after an hour of you two holding onto him.

“M-mommy, she-...she-” he stops when his voice cracks, and Changmin reassures him with a kiss on his forehead, telling him to take it slow.

Hyunjae has a bit of trouble breathing while explaining, but he manages to sort his thoughts. “I-I had a nightmare, and the storm s-scared me…” He flinches at the rumble of the thunder, working up the courage to continue.

“She—she yelled at me,” he whispers, sniffing loudly.

Changmin stiffens with every word that Hyunjae stutters, but he remains quiet, letting him go on.

“She yelled at m-me when I told her I was s-scared, a-and she-” The boy starts choking on his tears again at the memory, and Changmin helps him through it.

Everything clicks for the two of you after that. Hyunjae doesn’t need to say another word for you two to understand what happened, so you convince Hyunjae to take deep breaths.

Another hour passes, but this time you’re with Hyunjae in the bean bags, reading him his favorite book as he dozes off to sleep beside you.

Changmin’s left to clean up the water outside the playroom, tossing all the paper towels into a nearby trash can. He eyes the paper on his desk, staring at it. You’d be too busy to even notice if he calls, but he fights against his own beliefs.

He trusts you. He trusts you and your word, so he shoves the paper away back into its file, putting it back into the drawer.

You’ll finally talk it out with his mother, and things will be better.

//

The playroom is filled with silence once the storm has subsided. The dark clouds still remained in the sky and the winds were still causing the trees to trash around, but the rain had stopped and you could no longer hear any bursts of thunder.

You look over at the two sleeping boys in the bean bags, smiling warmly at them. Although the playroom is dimly lit, you could see Hyunjae snuggling up against Changmin’s chest, holding onto his arms. They looked comfortable, but you haven’t gotten an ounce of sleep.

For the past few hours, your mind has been constantly thinking of things to say to Hyunjae’s mother when she arrives. You’re thinking of the anger she’s given Changmin and the pain she inflicted on Hyunjae, but you’re still left with no words to say.

You hate to admit it, but you came to terms with the fact you’re scared. You’re scared for what’s to come, knowing that she could lash you out at any minute. She’s done it before, and she’ll certainly do it again.

It doesn’t help that she reminds you of your own parents, feeling the balance in power when she stands in front of you. Although she manages to muster up sweet words to you with that warm smile of hers, you knew she was anything but. She is manipulative and easily has you wrapped around her finger.

Hell, she knows she does. It came as no surprise when she called you, stating that she’ll be dropping Hyunjae off at the daycare. She doesn’t ask you because she knows you’ll drop everything for her son.

She knows how much you love him, and she holds that over your head like you’re a little kitty, enjoying the way you try to take away what’s hers.

Your face is buried into the palm of your hands as you try thinking of ways to confront her, but you’re given no more time when you hear her car pull up into the parking lot. Your eyes shoot up to the only clock in the room, acknowledging how it was 3 in the morning. With sluggish steps (and a defeated sigh), you remove yourself from the chair and make your way over to the two boys.

“Wake up,” you whisper, gently shaking the two boys awake.

Hyunjae is the first one to react, rubbing his eyes open with a confused expression worn on his face. “Huh?”

“Your mother is here,” you explain, bringing the small boy to his feet.

Changmin stretches his limbs before standing up. He shoots a look towards you when hearing the jingle from the entrance.

It hurts to see Changmin ever so expressionless, especially when you know what’s about to come; it’s why you prevent him from leaving the doorway of the playroom.

“Don’t- don’t say anything, okay? Just stand here. I’ll work this out on my own.”

He tries going against your words but you shoot your gaze to the ground, avoiding all eye contact with him. “T-trust me for once. Fighting with her will only makes things worse.”

His eyes soften at the sight of you, and he gives in with a nod. He does as he was told, standing by the doorway when you go to approach Mrs. Lee with Hyunjae.

She looks exhausted, but it doesn’t cover up how her eyes are darting into her son’s skull when he walks over to her, showing no remorse for what she had done.

The lady clears her throat and faces you, plastering the same kind smile she’s shown you ever since day one.

“Thank you, Y/N, for watching over him.” She glances over at Changmin, clearly noticing the other teacher in the room, but says nothing.

“Yeah, o-of course,” you whisper, peeking over at Changmin. You’re unsure how to continue, and he could easily tell, but he doesn’t make a single attempt to step in, repeating your words in his head.

“Mrs. Lee!!” you call out, stopping Hyunjae’s mother from leaving. Not only don’t you want to disappoint Changmin, but you know Hyunjae’s well-being is also on the line.

She turns around on her heels, furrowing her brows ever so innocently at you. “What’s the matter, Y/N?”

The question serenades you, making your mind run blank.

Changmin stares at you, breath caught up in his throat as he waits.

“I-....I never got to hug your son goodbye.” Your voice turns into a squeak, and you could feel Changmin’s eyes burning into the back of your head.

She looks down at her son, visibly holding back a scowl. “Well then….you heard them, Jaehyun. Go give Teacher Y/N a goodbye hug.”

Hyunjae stumbles over his feet as he makes his way over to you, hugging you tight. “Goodbye,” he whispers.

“Goodbye, Hyu-...J-Jaehyun.” You pull away from the hug to look at him, brushing your thumb over his cheek. “I’ll see you tomorrow, alright?”

He nods, repeating you through a murmur. “Tomorrow.”

Mrs. Lee’s phone begins to ring, and she picks it up, glaring at her son. “Let’s go, Jaehyun. It’s late.” She’s the first one to exit the doors, leaving while Hyunjae struggles to follow after.

When the door shuts, Changmin moves to reveal himself to you, and saying that he was fuming would be an understatement.

“What was that?”

You turn to him with your teeth latching onto your lower lip, not daring to meet his gaze.

“Look, Changmin-”

“No, don’t ‘look, Changmin’ me. You said you’ll tell her. You promised you’ll do something about it this time.” His voice breaks at the end of his sentence, disbelief washed over his features. “I-I trusted you, Y/N. I fucking trusted you to fix this for us, and you just let her go.”

He shakes off your apologies, pushing you away from him as he goes to pull the glass doors open.

“An ‘I’m sorry’ means nothing, Y/N. I thought you’d learn that by now,” he scoffs, gritting his teeth. He mutters a ‘pathetic’ before leaving you alone in the entrance, exiting the daycare.

The word takes a stab to your heart, and you feel your entire world crashing down on you. You follow him out, ready to beg for him to come back, but he’s already chasing after Hyunjae’s mother, taking matters into his own hands.

But you two stop in your steps when you see what was happening.

Mrs. Lee is talking on the phone, completely oblivious to how Hyunjae was falling behind her.

The boy is yelling out for her and telling his mother to slow down, but she doesn’t listen.

Changmin spots the car racing towards Hyunjae on the road, and he runs. You tail his steps, sprinting over onto the street to save Hyunjae from the car.

Changmin is faster when it comes to running, reaching Hyunjae in a quicker amount of time. He picks the boy up and tries to run, but it’s already too late.

The sound of the horn blaring fills up his ears, and the headlights blind Changmin’s vision.

He shuts his eyes and holds onto Hyunjae with his life, but nothing happens.

The car had swerved, and it struck you instead.

The vehicle comes to a halt, and the sound of your head colliding with the pavement fills the air.

Everything has gone silent, including Mrs. Lee’s voice when she sees what happened. Hyunjae is left in too much shock to process anything that he just witnessed, causing him to be handed over to his mother shortly after. Changmin no longer cares about what Mrs. Lee does with her son, rushing to the scene with pleas falling past his lips.

The driver has left their car, countless apologies pouring out of them as they stumble to call for emergency.

All Changmin could see was blood covering your figure. The liquid continuously pours out of you and into the puddles left by the storm, coloring the water a dark shade of red.

“No no no, Y/N.” He frantically pulls you into his hold, hugging you close against him with his hand patting your cheek. “Y/N, please talk to me.”

But you’re not moving. He feels for a pulse and finds it wavering, unsure if you were still with him. He begs for you to wake up, and the driver only watches with a hand over their mouth, in complete disbelief at what they had just done while informing the dispatcher.

Changmin is screaming your name, shaking you repeatedly as he sobs into your chest. He’s hugging onto the hand he kissed only hours ago, trying to not only reassure you but himself as well.

“We’ll—we’ll get through this together, o-okay? C-come on, Y/N, stay….s-stay with me. I know you’re there—I know-....I know you’re holding on. I-I believe in you.” His voice croaks as he utters the last sentence, his tears filling up his vision.

He doesn’t curse when blood seeps into his pajamas, praying as he tightly squeezes your hand. “S-stay with me, Y/N.”

//

One of the nurses gives him a fresh set of clothes when he enters the hospital, telling him they’ll do all they can to save you.

He nods and takes the clothes, going over to the bathroom. He locks himself inside and turns on the lights. He refuses to look at himself in the mirror, and he couldn’t tell if it’s because he would see his tear-stained cheeks or your blood drying up in the fabric of his pajamas.

The clothes he was given were nothing too special. It’s just a pair of jeans and a white t-shirt, and surprisingly they somewhat fitted him. He takes one last glance at the pajamas before tossing them into the trash can provided within the bathroom.

Changmin tries to calm his anxiety by setting the toilet lid down, sitting on it. Unfortunately for him, his mind refuses to stop racing with possible outcomes of the situation, leaving him irritated.

He stops thinking when realizing he left something in his pajamas, taking them out of the trash. He searches his pocket to find the thing that appeared in his mind, letting out a sigh of relief at the sight of the paper. He takes it out and drops the pajamas back into the can, sitting back down on top of the lid.

With shaky fingers, he unfolds the blood-stained painting. He doesn’t shed a tear at the sight, only praying that you’ll be okay with the luck the painting has always given him.

It always brought him the most luck out of any scenario, and he knows he needs it now more than ever.

After minutes of staring at it, he tucks it back into his pocket. He looks into the mirror and tells himself that everything will be okay. He forces himself to ignore any other signs telling him otherwise, clearing his mind before leaving the bathroom.

His footsteps echo throughout the hallway as he walks past the doors, hating how quiet the hospital seemed to be in the middle of the night.

Earlier, he was told not to enter your door, so when he came across the door numbered two, he sat down in the chair opposite from it.

He rests his elbows on his legs, closing his eyes as he tries to block out any sounds of the incident that wouldn’t stop ringing in his ears.

The sounds go silent at the click of the door in front of him, making him rise to his feet.

The nurse quickly shuts the door behind her, standing in front of it as she’s met with Changmin’s presence. A saddened, solemn expression takes over her features, but Changmin dismisses it when approaching her.

“How’s Y/N?” he asks, desperate to know about his lover’s condition. His eyes have a glint of hope in them, one that the nurse knows will vanish.

She hesitates to speak, fumbling with her fingers as she avoids all contact with Changmin. “You’re-...you’re the one who’s engaged to Y/N, correct?”

He nods, confirming his identity, and her eyes start to fill with sorrow. She parts her lips as if to say something but closes them shortly after to process her thoughts.

“Sir,” she begins. “Y/N-...in the incident, Y/N….Y/N lost a lot of blood.”

Changmin doesn’t hesitate to cut her off from continuing any further. “I can donate mine,” he offers. “We share the same blood type! AB, right?” He thinks back to when you found out about sharing the same blood type, jokingly declaring the two of you destined with fate after squealing about it.

The nurse pauses, and then shakes her head. “I’m afraid that’s not the case, sir-”

“Does Y/N need surgery?” Changmin asks, frantically pushing out his words. “I have the funds for everything, and I’ll pay anything just to make sure Y/N is alr-”

“Sir,” she says sternly, forcing him to cut off. After minutes of avoiding Changmin, she brings herself to have her gaze meet his, and only does Changmin now notice the tears prickling at her eyes. He shuts up, allowing the nurse to speak.

She looks down while digging for something through the pocket of her coat, slowly pulling the item out. “I-I came to return this to you,” she whispers.

“...What?”

The nurse hands the item to the male, and Changmin is finally able to tell what it is.

“...No. No, no there’s no way. Why-...would you give me the ring...Y/N-”

“We lost a pulse, sir,” she whispers, hanging her head as she drops the information.

Changmin’s entire body freezes and the ring in his hands falls, filling the empty hallway with the sound it makes when it hits the ground.

In complete denial, Changmin pushes past the nurse and pulls the door open, bursting into the room. His eyes search the room, and that’s when his gaze settles on the flat line presented on the monitor.

He stumbles back a few steps, and the only doctor in the room turns to look at him. She’s just as speechless as Changmin is, and she steps away from your bed to walk over to him.

“I’m so sorry for your loss,” she murmurs, leaving him alone with your lifeless body in the room

Although you’re covered head to toe with a white sheet, Changmin manages to get a glimpse of the blood dripping from your fingers, your now empty fingers, noticing the puddle that has been created on the ground.

The scene makes Changmin dizzy, and he feels like passing out as he uses the door frame as support. Too much is going on in his mind to have him fully comprehend what he is seeing; that it’s your body he’s looking at.

The nurse remains with him in the hallway, picking up the ring he dropped seconds earlier to hand it to him.

Just like the doctor, she apologizes as well, but Changmin doesn’t get to hear the end of it when he leaves with the ring. He storms past the staff walking through the hallways and leaves the hospital, not willing to have strangers witnessing his tears.

All Changmin does is get in his car and drive.

He drives to the daycare, refusing to let the reality dawn on him because when he reaches the daycare, he’ll be able to see you.

He’ll see you working at your desk, planning the activity for a day with a smile on your lips as you think about Hyunjae. He’ll see you twirling around in your swivel chair, telling him to join you.

But none of that happens when he enters the daycare, turning on the lights to the playroom. All he is met with is the vacancy of the room and your raincoat tossed onto one of the round tables.

And for the first time that night, Changmin realizes he’ll never see you again.

//

Growing up, people have always told Changmin to think about what he has rather than what he doesn’t have.

But how could he think about what he has when he no longer has you?

He doesn’t have you sitting in the passenger seat of his car, rating each song in his playlist or your smile that would wish him good morning whenever he enters the daycare. He doesn’t have your hand to hold and caress or your forehead to kiss.

He doesn’t have a reason to smile, so what was there to think about?

He didn’t even get a chance to say I love you.

It was such a foolish mistake to not say it to you everyday. If he had the chance, he would say it whenever you drift off to sleep and wake up beside him. He would say it after you slap him on the back for saying something stupid and kiss him on the cheek to make up for it.

But he never did. He never once uttered those cursed three words to you.

He was too lost in love to even acknowledge the lack of the three words being shared in the first place, and it doesn’t help that the world has taken you from him shortly after.

Changmin walks around the playroom in order to calm down the inferno burning up his insides, but that all fails when he drives his fist in the wall, wishing that the pain will replace the emptiness in his chest. He tosses all of the children’s paintings into the trash, along with the purple flowers you arranged for him a week ago.

With the only light in the playroom being the moonlight, he pulls out Hyunjae’s painting without thinking and tears it into pieces, ripping it until it could no longer be torn. The pieces fall onto one of the round tables like confetti, and his hands meet the table, letting out the sobs he’s been holding in ever since he’s heard the news from the nurse.

This place became his home in only two years, and he blames the stupid smile that would always reside on your face when you greeted him into the daycare. You and the kids were always the reason why he looked forward to waking up everyday, creating memories that would bring comfort to everyone in the room.

He sits down in one of the chairs, wiping away his tears as he pulls the ring out from his pockets, watching the way it glistens under the light illuminating from the moon. Carelessly, he tosses it onto the paper he’s ripped apart, pushing the table away from him.

You didn’t even get to wear it for a day.

Through his tears, he sees a paper on the ground, one that hadn’t been there when Changmin had entered the room. He quickly realizes that it fell out of the vase when he trashed the flowers away, picking it up between his fingers.

He hesitates to read what it says. He’s already dealing with too much pain that his heart is unable to handle anymore, but his fingers can’t help but move on their own, opening the paper to reveal the purple ink written all over.

Dear my (second) favorite person on earth,

I know you’ll throw these flowers away when they die. After all, that’s the classic Changmin I’ve grown to love so when you do, when you find this letter, I hope you read every single word I’m about to write.

I love yow.

I didn’t think my letter would get that fucked easily. Hyungseo tried peeking over my shoulder to see what I was writing, and I accidentally wrote a ‘w’ instead of a ‘u’ because of him. Honestly speaking, I hate it here. (No I don’t).

That reminds me. Did I ever tell you how much I love writing? We should write each other notes while we have the kids do an activity. You know, like highschoolers in love. I think it’ll be cute seeing you get caught writing mid-sentence by Hyunjae.

I should really stop rambling because Haknyeon’s starting to eat the petals from the flowers and Youngjae and Sunwoo refuse to stop hyping him up. Can you believe these boys? This is what you and Hyunjae are missing out on. I can’t believe you’ve been gone for hours now with him,, why’d you have to steal him from me >:( kidding, by the way. I hope you two are having fun without me. (Yes, I’m still petty).

I love you, Changmin. Two years with you, and I’ve never gotten to say it. It’s not like it matters because our love language is anything but, but it wouldn’t hurt to say it every now and then because I truly do mean it when I say I love you. I would say it to your face if I wasn’t such a wuss about it so here I am, expressing my feelings through a stupid letter. You better enjoy reading after this, by the way. I’m not going to write essays about how much I love you just for you to not read them.

Anyways, I bought this purple pen yesterday! It’s pretty, isn’t it? It isn’t the exact shade of purple you like, but the same could honestly be said about the assortment of flowers the boys and I made for you.

….Okay listen, I know you’re going to laugh when I show them to you. I swore the flowers looked beautiful when I bought them, but somehow when I gave them to the kids, they all managed to fuck them up and have them all bent in all the wrong places. So as an apology, I’m hoping this note makes up for it. Shit, I went off topic again.

I love you, Jichang. I love you more than words can do any justice, so instead of writing I love you a thousand different times…

Changmin, would you like the honor of being my boyfriend?

Shut up, I know you’ll say yes regardless, but I’ll still be expecting you to pick me up and twirl me around in the air, declaring yourself as my official boyfriend. It’d be nice, wouldn’t it?

Changmin sees how your handwriting trails off, figuring that was when he entered the playroom with Hyunjae and the popcorn. He wishes there was more to read, more to hear from you, but this is the most he’s ever going to get.

His sobs return, and he’s crying like Hyunjae except Changmin is in the arms of no one; no one to hold him, no one to tell him they’re there for him.

His mind is flashing images of you, reminding him of the memories he’s shared with you.

He’s reminded of the roll of your eyes when he would make a snarky remark and of your cuddles whenever all the kids have finally left the daycare. He remembers the way you would smile at him whenever he’s playing with the kids and how you always manage to unintentionally daydream about him when he’s sitting right beside you.

All those moments that made him fall in love with you are now memories that took turns taking a stab at his heart, crushing the organ until there was no more.

He wanted to scream at the world for taking you away from him so soon, but his throat is raw and he’s barely able to whisper. He’s craving your touch, your lips against his, and he’s wishing he could hear the jingle from the glass doors, signifying that you have arrived.

He wishes he had the chance to dance with you at least once in the middle of the empty playroom, maybe even practice the one you’ll share at your wedding.

The idea of the wedding makes Changmin look at the ring on the table, bringing it back between his fingers.

“I feel so lost,” he whispers, his voice breaking as he clutches onto the ring. “Y/N, what-...what do I do without you?”

He has no one to guide him, no one to tell him to believe in himself, and no one to love.

//

Changmin carries the last box into the trunk of his car, stacking it on top of the others. He wipes the sweat off his forehead, looking up at the sun shining bright in the sky despite it nearing winter. He pulls out his phone to check the time, realizing he has another thirty minutes before he has to leave.

In the past two months, Changmin has closed the daycare and called the dance academy. It took a few paperworks to be filled out before he’s officially accepted, and today is finally the day he’ll be leaving.

Changmin hears a car pulling up next to his in the parking lot, looking over to see who it was.

He regrets doing so, especially when Mrs. Lee leaves the driver’s seat.

“Ch-”

“The daycare’s closing, Mrs. Lee,” Changmin states, closing his trunk shut. “I have to leave soon too.”

His tone would’ve been more bitter if it wasn’t for the fact that Changmin is drained. For the past two months, Changmin has been drained of his tears and pain, causing him to be left with only soreness and a throbbing heartache.

“I know, I know, but Changmin, please listen to me.” She follows him across the street, tailing after his steps to the daycare. “My son keeps getting constant nightmares, and all I ask for is for you to give him all your time before you leave.”

“Your son?” he scoffs, stopping when he reaches the glass doors. “I owe you nothing.”

He wraps his fingers around the handle of the door, ready to push it open before hearing Mrs. Lee.

“Jaehy- Hyunjae. Hyunjae wants to see you. He wants to say goodbye.”

Changmin shuts his eyes at the name he’s been avoiding for so long, turning around in his spot to face his mother.

“Please, Changmin, talk to him one last time, I beg of you.” She’s distraught, not knowing how else to get her desperation across.

His mind runs over the idea of talking to Hyunjae for the last time, heart wrenching at the thought.

“Alright. Tell him to enter alone and make it quick. I don’t have all day.” Changmin’s just about to enter the daycare before realizing something, turning back around to look at the lady.

“Oh, and Mrs. Lee? Don’t bother ever stepping foot into this building ever again. I mean it. You’ve already inflicted enough pain.”

He pushes the door open and makes his way into the playroom.

The emptiness of the room engulfs him as he enters, looking at how lifeless the walls looked after taking down the colored posters that had the abcs written all over them. Truly nothing remained in the room except for the counters with sinks. The bookshelves have been donated along with all of the books, and the bean bags have been given to Sunwoo and Youngjae’s families. He looks around the room one last time, unable to pinpoint how he used to call this dinky place ‘home’.

A few minutes after roaming around the place with a hollow heart, Changmin hears the front two doors jingle, tiny footsteps making their way into the daycare.

Hyunjae peeks into the playroom and when he catches sight of Changmin, tears begin to fall down his face. He runs over to the male, wrapping his arms tightly around his waist as he breaks out into full-on sobs.

Changmin hesitantly crouches down so Hyunjae is able to hug him better, remaining emotionless as the young boy wets his shirt with his tears. His little fingers desperately cling onto his sleeves, and no words are exchanged between the two boys for minutes. Though, to Changmin, it feels like hours, holding the boy in his arms as he stares off into the void.

Hyunjae is the first to speak up, voice quivering. “Don’t leave,” he whispers.

Changmin struggles to find the right words to use in the moment but gives up, deciding to just be blatantly honest with the boy. “I have to, Hyunjae. I can’t stay. I’m leaving.”

Hyunjae looks up at him, redness tinting his puffy eyes while tears continuously pour down his face. “You can’t- you just can’t-” he sobs, going back to hiding his face in the teacher’s chest. “What w-would I do without you?”

Changmin pats the back of his head and thinks, smiling back at a memory. “Hyunjae, do you remember that book you always liked? The one Y/N bought for you two years ago?”

The nine-year-old stiffles his cries for only a second, nodding.

“The main character...He dies in the end, right?”

Again, Hyunjae nods.

“But you’ve read that book how many times?”

The boy frowns. “What does this have to do with anything?” he hiccups, wiping his tears away.

Changmin sighs. “Life is kind of like, well, a storybook. Whatever is written is permanent, and there’s nothing you can change. You can keep flipping the pages back and forth, wishing that you’ll be able to change the outcome, but you can’t because the ink has already seeped into the paper.

So it’s hard to, you know, turn the page when you know someone you loved ever so dearly won’t be in the next chapter, but you do it regardless. You come to accept the fact they’re gone because you’ll have to move on with the story, and eventually you’re able to turn that page.”

He cups Hyunjae’s cheeks in his hands, reassuring him. “You’ll move on, Hyunjae. Just like how you’ve gotten over the boy’s death in the book a trillion times. Trust me.”

“But that’s different,” Hyunjae reasons, removing Changmin’s hands from his face. “I-In the book, they still get their happy ending. In the book, the people still live happily ever after, even with the death of the boy.”

“Yes, ‘in the book’, Hyunjae. This is real life.” He looks at the ground. “Not all couples get happy endings.”

“But we could get ours.” Hyunjae makes Changmin look at him, tears being brought back into his eyes. “You’re here with me right now, and you can stay. You can stay with me, and we could write our own story with a happy ending.”

“I’m afraid it’s not that easy, Hyunjae,” the male whispers.

“Teacher Y/N already left,” Hyunjae mumbles. “I can’t-...I don’t want to lose you too.”

With shaky hands, Hyunjae reaches up to cup Changmin’s cheeks, tears cascading down his cheeks as he tries to speak. “P-please, please don’t leave me,” he hiccups through his tears.

Changmin closes his eyes, preventing himself from falling vulnerable into the hands of a nine-year-old. “I don’t make promises I can’t keep.”

“B-but we’re family, and family....family sticks together, right?”

“We’re not family, Hyunjae.”

Changmin’s words pierces into Hyunjae’s heart, and the boy no longer says anything else, the two allowing the young boy’s sobs to fill up the room.

Changmin opens his eyes to look at Hyunjae, and he knows this image of Hyunjae will forever be engraved into his mind.

And out of nowhere, Changmin smiles. He smiles because he knows they’ll be okay.

“Thank you.”

Hyunjae sniffs loudly, still holding onto Changmin’s cheeks. “F-for what?” The boy is biting back his upcoming batch of tears, but it fails when Changmin starts to speak.

“Thank you, Hyunjae, for being the sunshine that always brightens the daycare’s day and being the shooting star that glitters the dark skies at night. Thank you for your little surprise hellos and your comforting goodbyes. Thank you for the happiness you’ve brought to not only me, but Teacher Y/N as well.” Changmin finally allows his tears to fall, not breaking eye contact with Hyunjae. “Thank you for being so fucking strong for the both of us and growing up to be the angel Y/N will always love and cherish.”

Hyunjae’s sobs even harder after hearing Changmin, unable to contain himself. “Please-...don’t go.”

But the male continues. He removes his face from Hyunjae’s palms and moves to rest his forehead against the boy’s, working his words through his own tears.

“Thank you for being your bestest self in front of everyone. Thank you for bringing a smile to everyone’s faces every single day, and thank you for always giving me a reason to wake up. Thank you for being the first person to give me hugs and loving me when no one else would. Thank you for making me feel like a kid again these past two years. Thank you, Hyunjae, for being the gift in my life.”

Changmin pulls away from the young boy and presses a sweet, gentle kiss to his nose, hugging him tightly afterwards. “I love you,” he whispers.

The teacher then stands up and doesn’t take another glance at the boy he had only broken further, leaving the playroom. He walks out the glass doors of the daycare and heads for his car, looking ahead towards the path he was always meant to take.

The kid inside him once played hide and seek for twenty three years, and during those twenty three years, Changmin refused to play along.

Now, the only person that remains inside the vacant daycare is the kid Changmin grew to love and eventually left behind; the boy that led him to his inner kidult.

Maybe, just like in Hyunjae’s painting, Changmin was the devil after all.

As always, you’re reading a book despite how late it is at night. Your legs are sprawled out on top of the blankets, waiting for Changmin to exit the bathroom as usual.

He’s dressed in his usual flannel pajamas, a bright smile on his face. You close your book and set it aside before spotting a piece of paper peeking out from the pockets in his pants.

“You bring that thing everywhere, don’t you?”

“Huh? This?” Changmin pulls it out of his pocket and waves it in the air, making you confirm his words with a nod.

“Why wouldn’t I?” he snorts, raising his brows. “If you had this gem, you’d bring it everywhere too.”

You roll your eyes and grab a pillow, tossing it at his face. “Yeah sure, but I wouldn’t shower with it, dummy.”

He stumbles back due to the hit and picks it up from the ground, tossing the pillow right back at you. “I don’t shower with it!” he exclaims.

Changmin joins you on your bed after setting Hyunjae’s painting down onto the nightstand, yawning loudly.

“Whatever you say, Jichang.”

You put the pillow back into its spot and bring the blankets over both of your bodies after turning off the lamp, leaving the two of you in complete darkness. Though, the lack of light doesn’t stop Changmin from bringing you close against him, snuggling up to you.

It’s silent, and you would think he’s asleep until he shifts in his spot.

“Y/N?”

“Hm?”

“Isn’t it crazy how like...Hyunjae painted that thing when we only knew each other for, what? Two days?” He scrunches his nose at the memory before turning to look at you to see what you thought.

“It is,” you respond. “Kids do the darndest things.”

Changmin laughs at your word choice but agrees nonetheless. “Don’t you think it somehow links with fate? The two of us ending up together?”

“Mmm, perhaps. Depends on how you put it.” You shift in your spot, turning to face him. “Hyunjae’s special like that.”

You reach to hold one of his hands, playing with his fingers. “Together forever,” you sigh, pressing a kiss against his knuckles.

“That includes Hyunjae, right?” Changmin asks, lazy eyes watching your every movement as a cheeky smile makes its way to his lips.

You laugh, nodding. “Yes, that includes Hyunjae. All three of us...together forever....Oh my god, Changmin, remember that pinky promise you had the three of us do before you left?”

He grins at the memory, remembering how grim that day turned out to be until he asked you out. “Yeah, yeah I do.”

He pulls his hand away from you to tuck his nose into the crook of your neck, growing drowsier with each hum that escapes you.

“The three of us and our happy little ending,” Changmin murmurs, that being the last thing he says before drifting off to sleep.

NAVIGATION | TBZ MASTERLIST

[clearvenus]

(bad) editing tutorial

hellooooo so this editing tutorial was requested by the lovely @phoenixresurgent. this is for basic story scenes, so nothing too fancy. I do the same with edits but just with a lot more carefully and with a lot more thought put into it. disclaimer, im not the best at editing or using photoshop, and even worse at explaing what im doing. im fairly inconsistent in how i edit. my editing is basically a mashup of editing tutorials of a few blogs i follow on here, so you guys will probably recognize some of the thing im doing.

keep in mind have a reshade preset which does a lot of the work for me :3c

OK so first i start off with a fresh screen shot from my game, and duplicate the background/layer 0. that wayi have the original in case i mess up, but also to keep track of the progress im making as i edit. 

then i go in with topaz clean:

in case you can’t see, the only things ive messed around with is edges, and i have accent set to 3, radius to 1.50, and sharpness to 1.00.

then i go into filter > camera raw filter, and set the exposure from anywhere to +0.10-+0.50, depending on how bright the picture is. most of the time i set it to +0.40 but its fairly bright in the scene so i only set it to +0.25. 

then i always set contrast and clarity +7. 

ill then go in and use some actions. first i’ll use warm n’ colorful, delete the curves layer, sometimes the level’s layer if i find the image to still be too bright after using the action. i merge all the layers except the original layer. and then i go in with melanchole, but ive modified this action to not have the first or the last layer. and then i merge the layers again, excluding the original layer. 

then i go for the lighting effects:

since this takes place in the late afternoon, i set the color to a nice warm yellow. its usually on the whiter side, because the tint from the effect is very strong. i then position the effect to where the original light source is (the sun in this case but if its in a room i set it to where the lamps or ceiling lights are) . and then i mess around with the ambiance and intensity, which i dont have a set number for because it usually varies from picture to picture.

extra but sometimes i do lighting effects twice to make the photo more intense, or if theres another light sources behind a sim or object. when i do this i duplicate the layer that already has the lighting effects on it, then add the second one, use a layer mask, invert the layer mask (ctrl+1 i think), and go over the parts of the screen shot i want the light to be visible (around the sim or object). 

then i dodge and burn (shading and highlighting), but im not good at explaining that but i learned by following this tutorial. i know a lot of other simmers do this differently but this is just how i learned how to do it, and it works well.  

then if theres any other extra things i want to add, dust or scratch overlays, noise, smoke, breath, hair, change their expression using liquefy, ill do that on a new layer (for the liquify part tho i just duplicate the previous layer then go in with the liquefy tool and start adjusting stuff).

in this case since theyre outside on a cold winter day, i added breath by making a new layer, using my breath brushes (u can find some on deviantart by googling breath brushes or something like that), setting the opacity to 10%~20%, and start adding that, adjusting the brush size as i go. 

then i add my subs and thats pretty much it! sorry if this is hard to understand, im shit at explaining stuff, or if there were any typos bc i did NOT proof read this at all asoidsdnhaisod. 

heres a before and after 

(the difference isnt really apparent here but i promise its more noticeable in other photos ;_;)

[athcnvs]

aLLL of them

Send “✆” for a MORNING text.

[ 11:57 ] ➝ graham: my eyes are aren’t fully open yet but good mornign my dearest[ 11:58 ] ➝ graham: is it still morning i think it’s still morning why is my csreen so brgih t[ 11:58 ] ➝ graham: yes just in time im up before noon are u proud of me????[ 11:59 ] ➝ graham: say ur proud of me ://

Send “” for a text that WASN’T SENT. 

[ UNSENT ] ➝ graham: hey if i wasnt so hung up over brandon during high school, do you think we would have dated? idk why i’m thinking about this now bc it’s so long ago, but do you think? i probably misunderstood and you probably didn’t have feelings for me back then, but i can’t help thinking about the possibility that you did. in retrospect, you really did care about me a lot, even way back when. i can’t believe that i took you for granted. i know i’ve apologized for it several times, but i had no idea how good i had it. i feel like i took you for granted more than i apologized for it and then teagan happened and i dont know. i didn’t have the right to be jealous, so why was i??? why do i have to keep building up walls?? why can’t i give anyone a chance??? i’m so stupid i should have let you in from the start. fuck brandon, i hate him. why am i so dumb??? why am i writing this why do i think this would even make a difference?? maybe i should take ur advice from before and give up on what’s never going to happen bc ur my best friend and i cant let anything or anyone change that

Send “☎” for a RUSHED text. 

[ 15:31 ] ➝ graham: my phone is at 1% but pls remind me to tell u abt my day bc i was hit on by a cute boy and i feel very conflicted atm im omw back soon lov u

Send “⁇” for a DRUNK text.

[ 01:12 ] ➝ graham: ui have a sueqtion[ 01:12 ] ➝ graham: do yoyu caer about me ?[ 01:13 ] ➝ graham: like hkonestly?[ 01:14 ] ➝ graham: i know dyou say you do btu are you telgling thbe trtuh[ 01:14 ] ➝ graham: pim afraid that one day youre goign tto stop caring about me[ 01:14 ] ➝ graham: i love you pso much i dont want to eewvr lose you[ 01:15 ] ➝ graham:im afraid of aour friendship being ruuined [ 01:15 ] ➝ graham:evertiyhngs a mess but i lvoe u

Send “✿” for a SUGGESTIVE text. 

[ 18:22 ] ➝ graham: yea sure just give me a sex[ 18:22 ] ➝ graham: OMG THAT WAS A TYPO[ 18:22 ] ➝ graham: WHY CAN’T WE UNDO TEXTS IT’S 2017 [ 18:22 ] ➝ graham: I’M SO SORRY PLS DO NOT BRING THIS UP

Send “ø” for a LATE NIGHT text.

[ 04:34 ] ➝ graham: u up? i can’t sleep[ 04:34 ] ➝ graham: i’ve just been staring at the ceiling… thinking[ 04:34 ] ➝ graham: my first instinct was to text u about it[ 04:39 ] ➝ graham: ur probably asleep nvm

Send “✘” for a HATEFUL text.

[ 02/23/13, 22:35 ] ➝ graham: ok can u pls stop telling me that i should just give up on brandon????? like holy shit graham[ 02/23/13, 22:35 ] ➝ graham: i get that you’re trying to look out for me but i can handle things on my own u kno[ 02/23/13, 22:37 ] ➝ graham: if i want to go out and get my heart broken at least let me learn my lesson[ 02/23/13, 22:40 ] ➝ graham: i really don’t mean to be confrontational with u because you’ve always been so kind to me, but trust me on this ok???? just…. let me try to fix this bc i really care about him and i’m getting tired of everyone telling me that he’s not worth it bc he means a lot to me and since u kno how i’ve felt abt him u should respect my decision to go through with this and take my chances[ 02/23/13, 22:41 ] ➝ graham: i just dont want to give up on someone that mattered so easily and i’m going to hope that he still hasn’t given up on me

Send “#” for a RANDOM text.

[ 02:05 ] ➝ graham: did u kno that the pillsbury doughboy’s real name is…[ 02:06 ] ➝ graham: poppin’ fresh[ 02:06 ] ➝ graham: i mean i guess their products should be poppin’ after they’re fresh out of the oven… they should give him sunglasses

Send “@” for a SCARED text.

[ 23:11 ] ➝ graham: i see people who are so passionate abt their craft and i keep thinking that i’ve made a mistake in my life and that i should have found a way to move forward with music even though my parents would probably yell at me forever??? i mean computer science is cool and all and people make a lot of money but is that really what i want in life??? i guess there are cs jobs in entertainment but i guess it’s not exactly what i was thinking of. but at the same time maybe i’m not a good enough musician to do anything with it.[ 23:16 ] ➝ graham: i guess my youtube channel is good enough for now but what does it matter if i’m not happy in the end u kno???? o well…. que sera que sera i guess i’m gonna go back to transcribing this tab

Send “&” for a LOVING text.

[ 23:16 ] ➝ graham: hey saw these scans from a book called soppy online and it’s so cute??? some of them made me think of us[ 23:17 ] ➝ graham: hold on lemme send[ 23:21 ] ➝ graham: [ attachment ][ 23:21 ] ➝ graham: [ attachment ][ 23:21 ] ➝ graham: [ attachment ][ 23:22 ] ➝ graham: that last one is when im playing overwatch

Send “%” for a CURIOUS text.

[ 12:42 ] ➝ graham: what is ur stance on matching hoodies??[ 12:42 ] ➝ graham: i’m not planning on buying any or anything i was just asking for a friend who saw something online[ 12:43 ] ➝ graham: the colors are the inverse of each other and i think they look cool

Send “ツ” for an EXCITED text.

[ 14:23 ] ➝ graham: GRAHAM GRAHAM HARHAFAMRA HRRAHAM GHRAM[ 14:23 ] ➝ graham: IM SCREAMING CAN U HEAR ME[ 14:23 ] ➝ graham: I’M ABT TO HIT 100K ON MY CHANNEL HOLY MOLY[ 14:24 ] ➝ graham: LET’S GO OUT AND CELEBRATE WHEN I DO

Send “$” for an ACCIDENTAL text.

[ 13:52 ] ➝ graham: https://youtu.be/58-jcJupBug[ 13:52 ] ➝ graham: oh my god that’s not the video i wanted to send u[ 13:52 ] ➝ graham: i… have no idea how that got in my clipboard  

Send “♀” for a HEARTBREAKING text. 

[ UNSENT ] ➝ graham: sometimes i ask myself how the events of my life led me to this point. sometimes i wonder how different things would have been if slowly distanced myself from you. or if i found some reason to hate you. there were so many instances where i could have vanished from your life. would you have noticed if i did?? sometimes i think about how my life would probably be less complicated and messy if i wasn’t your best friend. if i didn’t love you so much. but here i am, and here i will forever be. i wish i could give myself the closure i need, but it’s been four years and i still don’t know where i stand or how i feel about you. four. years. i just hope that i don’t mess things up for the both of us. in the end, it’s the two of us against the world. wow ok that sounded dramatic athena what are you doing[ 03:04 ] ➝ graham: i can’t believe i’m really out here tearing up to the ost of a kdrama at 3 o clock in the morning… who am i??

[burnedhybrid]

nonnie <3

I didn’t want to post your ask because I didnt want anyone going to this person and potentially bashing them for their views and since you asked me- I’m just putting this out there for you :)

As a Klayley shipper too, I have to say I do agree with everything they said regarding Klayley. I’ve said it before that I’d love to see that play out, it’s not a popular opinion, but it's my opinion. Klaus has really matured, and come into his own this season, I’ve really loved watching that happen. I think Hayley and Klaus’ relationship has gotten to this really beautiful position. I’m all here for it. I don’t think that’s something that can happen over night. But I hope they write that well, if and when it happens.

Bare in mind I said I agree with everything she said about the ship- The individual characters however;

I put Hayley and her happiness first. I haven’t denied that. Her being happy regardless of whether she’s in a relationship with whomever really isn’t a bother. She’s a mother now, Hope is her everything. I agree with the majority of her view points, they are valid and she handled the questions so well, I’m afraid I’m not as eloquent with my words but I’ll give it a go. Sorry to be a little vague as well, I’m not here to start wars, lmao. The points I don’t share the same agreement on will be addressed below -

Elijah is a very complex character. While I do think this season weve seen a different side to him I’d also like highlight a pattern I’ve seen in his character. Family and their values are very dear to him. Elijah will always put himself at the front line to be in battle and not care about the outcome when it comes to protecting those he cares for. This isn’t about Hayley, this is about Family. Its a trait he’s always had, all you have to do is look back, read the TO books and do your homework. 

Their cursed lives affected him dramatically and he’s been the big brother trying to keep somewhat of a resemblance of what once was, and what he hoped his family to be, which is why he was so encouraging for klaus to accept the baby. He remember what it used to be like that and due to everything that’s happened in his centuries of living.

Like Klaus, things changed, people changed and they both hardened. Both committed unforgivable crimes. But Klaus admitted that Elijah is better than him, he does it for his family insinuating they did it for fun. For sport. For the heck of it.

Elijahs happiness has always been stopped one way or another, this has been something he’s dealt with since he was a child. With all that happened he was kind of thrown into this parental figure for his siblings and has always sought out that bond and unity. During his centuries of course Elijah has hardened and numbed to a lot of emotion. He admitted himself he has no clue what feeling human is like anymore. And honestly, if you think about it, he’s had every reason to, he lives and breathes for his family and strives to bring back what they once had as humans. In turn he’s been daggered, had lovers killed in front of him, by family members, by klaus, been manipulated, walked all over and I’m keeping that light- and after all of that, he dusts himself off and continuously puts himself in compromising positions to make others happy. He gets shit on, cleans himself off, gets shit on, cleans himself off- you get the picture.

After centuries of that cycle, don’t you think that you’d harden too? Maybe thats why Elijah is able to walk into a battle ground and do what he has to do if it’ll bring the family peace/safety. 9/10 no one even notices either. Once he died and Klaus stood over his body and apologized. Last season Klaus told Elijah he couldnt ‘do this’ without him. Dare I say it- Elijah is the backbone of this family. He’s so used to that position of brushing aside his own feelings, wants and needs for another. A friend pointed out to me the other day that when Freya told him she wasn’t going to let him die Elijah looked shocked, I went back and watched it and I got it. Freya is the oldest now, she vowed to take care of him and in all honesty I dont think hes ever had that feeling. He switched roles, he became the little brother, he was looked after. Its really nice to see.

Of course he’s going to think the core of his foundation is this blood riddled room, with the most painful memory/version of himself in. He’s been doing that all of his life. He hates that side of himself, he tries to run from that and he always ends up back to square one.

But this has been centuries of this spiral and he met Hayley and she was innocent and young a massive reminder of what humanity was and is to him. She encourages him to find that within him again.

Hayley know this, she’s just never seen it and when she did, he attacked her, with the intent to kill. And she’s reacting the way any woman should. I agree with her. Elijah was wrong for that, regardless, she’ll probably forgive him too because she loves him. She was still in there, it was all very real for her, regardless. But she’ll regard the circumstance they were in. But for herself, for Hope, she’ll move on. 100% agree.

In turn Hayley is a baby in this battlefield, she’s young and just as she got used to and grasped the fact she was a wolf, at least when she was just that she could comprehend that, she was still built like a human, she then became a hybrid and there she is now even farther from her human roots, dealing with things like humanity switches. She strives to stay human, to feel pain, to not block it out. Personally I think it’s for an array of reasons. Hope being number 1. She wants to give that little girl to have everything that she and klaus never did. They can’t be numb and raise a child. I’ve said already that I agree with them breaking up, i was never angry about the ship ending. They were doomed from the start. Always said that. Its a tragic love story.

Insinuating that the man whos only ever acted in violence for his family's greater good suddenly is a woman beater, when the whole cast have been doing these crimes from the beginning of time is absurd.

Using that relationship as an example doesn’t make sense since Elijah went about everything the right gentlemanly way.

But I still stand by being upset at the writer's’ personal bias conveying into their writing. Give me a week to get over it. Lol. I get the point they were trying to make. I’m a feminist, I have people in my family that have had violence and abuse in their household. I love that they felt compelled to change scripts is awesome. This show is notorious for promoting that romanticized violence. So is TVD, especially TVD. Elijah’s character was a poor representation is all. That wasn’t fair on his character.

But its a show. Its fake and its fragments of people's imagination played out on screen its not real. I have a ton more views in some previous posts  you can search  for those on my blog to see some more opinions.

Also again- this is why I don’t follow certain tags, because I dont like hate from different sets of the fandom. Its so unnecessary. I’m so sorry if someone from another ship has been giving you hate. I hope it gets better soon.

Also, also- sorry for the typo’s in advance, this is so long and I didnt bother editing lmao.