#i know i am not active here and i barely talk about bts on my texts or on my twitter account

[sugajimin]

.

[sollucets]

I warned you, should you open fic requests I’d be coming straight for your inbox with AkkAyan. I’m obsessed with on our way up/the sky full of stars and I wondered if you’d be willing to write something of it we didn’t get to see like their cooking date from chapter 4 or dinner at Akk’s house from chapter 3

tiis do you know i love you dearly

context from my fic on our way up:

The thing is, he and Akk had spent last night doing crimes against the culinary arts (jointly trying to make stir-fried basil pork in the tiny dorm room kitchen in a small disaster that ended in takeout) + The disaster at his dorm had been almost entirely Akk’s fault, and he’ll die on that hill.

so! as requested i took this briefly referenced incident and proceeded to project my personal (lack of) cooking skills on akk for about 1k(?? these things happen) of fluff. this ficlet brought to you by my best friend thaicookbooktv (and my milestone event. i guess)

💜

"Can I trust you with that?"

Akk glances up from the two eggs he's just started frying to glare at his boyfriend. There's a smug look on Aye's face as he leans against a counter on the other side of the cramped dorm kitchen (and thus within potential grabbing reach) and uses a little bowl to crush up some garlic and peppers (making grabbing probably a bad idea). "I know how to make eggs, Ayan."

"If you say so," Aye tells him, singsong. "I've never once seen you cook."

"That doesn't mean anything." Returning his gaze to the pan, Akk startles to see them more cooked than they should be and hurriedly, awkwardly gets them flipped before Aye gets to pretend it's evidence.

If it'd been anyone else, Akk might have admitted to the truth, which is that he does (sort of) know how to make eggs, and he can grill meat if he's invited to barbecue, but much more is beyond him. He thinks he could be good at it, with time, but he’d never learned to cook much at home, and at school he’d had so much to do that it had always been faster and easier and cheaper to have cafeteria leftovers or something instant. 

But it isn’t anyone else, it’s Aye, and when he’d asked all earnest if they could cook together when he visited, Akk had gritted his teeth and then spent most of last night and the part of the bus ride over that he had decent data on looking up recipes. 

So it’s particularly infuriating that Aye seems to have figured him out right away anyway. Akk scowls down at his eggs. 

“All set over here,” Aye says, then snorts audibly. “What’s that look for? Did the egg insult your parents or something?” 

“Shut up.”

Aye brings his bowl over to Akk’s side of the kitchen and sets it next to the other ingredients on the counter to the right of the stove. He’d only been banished over there in the first place for being distracting; Akk probably should’ve known he’d manage it anyway. 

A moment later, there’s a light breeze against the back of his neck, and Akk jerks against the tickle, barely suppressing a yelp. He’s not actually holding the pan, just his spatula, so the worst that happens to the eggs is them getting slightly jostled, but he aims a blind elbow in the direction of Aye anyway, making contact with his ribs. “Jackass.” 

“Violent authoritarian,” Aye responds, cheerful if slightly strained. “Those look good."

Once the eggs are safely off the heat, Aye hands him a larger pan, shuffling some things around on the little counter once there’s enough space. “Turn the heat up a little higher and put a little oil in there, okay?” 

Akk glances over for the bottle of vegetable oil and grabs it. His recipe-searching had turned up the idea, but Aye isn’t using one, and Akk does not know how much ‘a little’ is. He sighs, sends a sideways look at Aye where he’s putting the egg pan in the sink, and tentatively pours some oil in. 

“More than that.”

Frowning, Akk does as told. When he checks Aye’s reaction, he finds his boyfriend leaning on his hip against the counter and holding the bowl of vegetables again. 

“Were you nervous about this?” Aye asks, tone a too-familiar combination of fond and condescending.

“Why would I be,” says Akk, too quickly. Always too quickly. That’s something Aye’s pointed out before, he should know better. 

“‘Cause you wanted to impress me? I understand.” 

Akk rolls his eyes, keeping his attention on the oil where it’s heating up. “You’re extra annoying today. Is it a special occasion?” 

“Of course it is,” says Aye, tone gone painfully sincere. “My boyfriend came to see me.”

When Akk reacts far too late to keep a smile off his face, Aye pokes his cheek. “I’m happy, too,” he coos. “Now scoot, please. This next part has to happen kind of fast.”

Akk shuffles out of the way, letting Aye move in front and pour his little bowl into the pan, and sends a baleful look at Aye’s back. He’s looking far too cool in this situation; it has to be fixed. 

Decided, Akk moves until he’s right behind his boyfriend, then hooks his chin over his shoulder, looping both arms around his waist, and glances down at the pan. With the bowl poured out, something looks a little suspicious in the garlic-to-chili pepper ratio. “Aye,” Akk says, trying to make sure his breath hits the skin of Aye’s neck over his t-shirt, “Did you put enough spice in?” 

Annoyingly, Aye takes this without much in the way of reaction, only leaning back into Akk’s hold, and doesn’t even flinch. He reaches out for the bowl of meat and says, amused, “The neck is your weakness, not mine, Bigfoot.”

“That’s not an answer."

“Hey, who's the one of us that actually knows how to make it?” 

“I could figure it out,” Akk says mutinously, dropping his face all the way to Aye’s shoulder in defeat and speaking into his skin. It’s not his fault Aye is apparently some kind of cooking expert who’s never needed a recipe in his life. 

Aye laughs, just audible over the suddenly-loud sizzling sound of what Akk assumes is him adding something else to the meat. “I’m sure you could, baby, you’re smart. You just haven’t had much practice.”

“I help at home,” Akk retorts, offended.��

“I know, I know.” Aye’s shoulder moves, presumably stirring, as he continues, “You don’t need to worry about it. I’ll cook for you, so long as you always do the dishes.” 

Squeezing Aye’s waist just that bit too hard in retribution, Akk scoffs. “As if. I’ll practice more. I’m not doing your dishes for the rest of our lives.”

The sizzling gets a little louder, and Aye doesn’t respond. Akk blinks, lifts his head, and sees Aye frozen over the stove, one hand out on a bottle of soy sauce and the other not moving a spatula at all. “What?” 

“You said—” Aye starts, sounding awed. “You said ‘the rest of our lives’.”

“Oh.” Akk swallows on the impulse to deny it and just— lets it sit. Hides his face in Aye’s shoulder again and leaves it there, feels his ears heating up. What can he say? They’ve made the joke before, about their pins and wedding rings. It’s stupid, they’re teenagers, they’ve gone too fast, and he meant it, or it wouldn’t’ve slipped out.

Gratifyingly, Aye seems just as unable to speak for a moment. Eventually, he stutters, “I— that— sounds good to me,” and then, “I love you,” and then, “Oh, shit, the pork.” 

[bookscandlesnbts]

they must have been planning/talked about this for a long time since the application process starts so far in advance, and then they went on their japan trip so would’ve had moments alone nearer to the enlistment time so of course they would have private moments to talk, but it also must be so difficult when you’re moments from actually enlisting and there’s btb staff cameras, media cameras, parents and family, 2 enlisted members and everything! so overwhelming - the moment where JK rubs JMs head and JM looks away then back at him, and that long look they cut at the end of the btb felt so…. heavy

Hi anon. Get ready for some all over the place thoughts because honestly, I’ve been having a hard time. And I knew I would, but even trying to anticipate this and getting myself mentally “ready”, I am not ready. I was not ready to say goodbye to Jimin, to Jikook to any of the members. And I’m not fooled. 18 months is a long damn time. If it’s this hard on day 2, then I need to prepare myself. I need distractions. If I still get anons, and can come up with things to post, then I will stay active on here. I have no one to gush about BTS with in my real life and even less so now that they are all gone to MS. I made it 2 minutes into Jimin’s last live and then I couldn’t do it. He was devastated. He was holding back tears and we know from a decade worth of content that Jimin is not one to cry easily. He waited until the very last second to cut his hair. It really broke my heart to know that he has to do this and doesn’t want to at all. In fact, I spent pretty much all of yesterday and the day before crying and now I am having moments where I break down if I’m alone with my thoughts for too long. Don’t be fooled either. It’s not just Jimin. I’m furious that all the members and every citizen has to. That MS is mandatory. But I’m not going to talk about that or go further into my thoughts on it.

I figured it would only be a matter of time before we learned more about the application timeline, but I knew it had to be far enough in advance. If I had even known that a companion enlistment existed, I would have called it from Day 1 that they would enlist together, but I sadly can’t claim that.

I hope they got as ready as they possibly could. It seemed like the reality set in for JM and JK during their lives, and unlike some of the shittest most obnoxious parts of the fandoms (yn cis hets looking at you) that claimed that JK was going to be so excited to go and want to even stay longer, he wasn’t. He wasn’t at all. His live was short and somber. He also said that he was iffy about it. I know BTS didn’t want special treatment, and part of me is glad that they didn’t get it because of the uproar that it would cause, but it’s still awful that they had to do it at all. I have to trick myself sometimes into thinking that it’s not what it really is just to cope.

The way Jimin bent forward to JK showing him his head made me cry. He needed comfort and approval, and JK just rubbed it over and over and looked away from Jimin for a minute. I think he was overwhelmed too. Of course, he complimented him which was so sweet.

I’ll be honest, I’m pretty terrible at noticing footage cuts, but that one was SO OBVIOUS that if I can notice it, then it’s really bad. I can’t even speculate what was cut because I’m not creative but my guess is that they said something comforting and private to each other.

In summary, I hate this. I knew I would hate it. But it’s so much more painful than I could have imagined and I think it’s because JM and JK were both so sad in their lives. And don’t get me wrong, I’m so so glad they were honest with us. That’s how you know that they aren’t “fake” and “scripted” like some idiots want all of the members to be characters in a tv show. They are human and they bared their human emotional souls to us. And it broke my heart and it will for the next 18 months. I think about how long we have been without Jin already and it sucks so much. But we will be there for each other. We will try to have little joys and experiences. We will work on ourselves and improve whatever it is we want to improve or achieve. Or some days or most days we will just fucking exist. We also don’t have to do anything monumental or special. Existing is enough too. Existing until 2025 when they reunite.

[idekforfun]

Comfort ... JJk

Summary: After scoring an invite to JHope's album release party, Yazmine isn't expecting anything more than to stick to the sidelines and enjoy the free drinks and music. Little did she know what her ever growing relationship with the rapper would lead her to.

Pairing: Idol!Jungkook x OC

Genre: Fluff, slight angst, strangers to lovers, ongoing series

Word count: 2.7k

...

The only thing I am able to think of as my eyes scatter across the room of popular faces is "the amount of talent in this room is enough to swallow me whole". I’m overwhelmed with anxiety and I can't seem to remember how I was ever able to suppress it. I'm finding it increasingly hard to hide behind my extrovert persona, the one that is a lie, a huge lie in fact.

 I realized I had been lost in my head when the sound of loud clapping brought me back to the real world. I barely catch the very end of Hoseok's speech, something along the lines of "Thank you for supporting me", and "enjoy the food and music" then he gives a bow and walks down the stairs where he is immediately pulled into conversation. Oh, I can't even imagine the anxiety he must be feeling. I could simply stick to a corner and hide in the shadows, whereas he has to socialize with everyone out of obligation.

Socializing. For some reason I forgot that I'd have to do that. I've been able to avoid it thus-far having arrived minutes before the actual album started playing. Now, everywhere I looked someone was talking to someone else. I realized I couldn't just stand here alone forever. I examine the room for someone I know, even better someone I have interviewed because I'll take any familiarity I can at this point. This whole ordeal is making me question my job because how am I able to meet celebrities on the daily, and here I am stressing about having to socialize at a party.

I was too in my head again, so I didn't realize someone had been calling my name until I felt a few taps on my shoulder. When I turn around, I was met with no other than Jessi, thank god. We have met on more than one occasion, and she has a weird ability of making people extremely comfortable, something I am immensely thankful for right now.

"Yaz!" She pulls me into a hug. It actually does well to soothe me. "I didn't know you were coming."

"I didn't know either," I pulled back from the hug with a gentle smile. "Actually, I was kind of surprised."

"Why, are you and J-hope not close?" she questioned.

"I mean, I had him on the show and we got on really well. We've also messaged a lot, too." I know I sound hesitant speaking, as if I'm not sure of the words I am saying. It is kind of hard to believe that Hoseok would want a friendship with me of all people, let alone be close.

"Oh, he definitely adores you, we even talked about you once," she has a sparkle in her eye as she talks and for some reason, I feel obliged to believe her. "Also, he was one of the best episodes on your show by far."

She is right about that. It has been my most viewed interview by a pretty wide margin. Part of me knows it’s due to the fact that he is J-hope of BTS, obviously, but it was also such a good video. All my interviews follow a simple formula. I bring the guest on and we engage in whatever activity they enjoy, in Hoseok’s case dancing. It brings a different level of intimacy that you can’t get from simply sitting across from one another and reading questions from a card. The conversation always flows naturally, and it’s all so genuine. On top of that, even I can admit that Hoseok and I just clicked. Our personalities complimented each other well. So much that we even continued to develop our relationship through messaging, and now I am attending his album release party which is a very important step in his solo career. Maybe we are closer than I allowed myself to believe.

“Yeah, it was pretty great actually.” I could see her eyes light up at my slight self-indulgence. Maybe I should give myself more credit.

We both turn our heads at the call of Jessi’s name from across the room. She gives me another smile and hug and tells me that she’ll find me later. I am left alone again but it’s not as bad as before. The anxiety has decreased significantly, which made my apparent hunger more noticeable. Hoseok did say to enjoy the food so I might as well. The snack table was filled with delicious finger food. As I was reaching my hand to grab a bite of some expensive looking cheese on a toothpick someone called my name. I turned around to find none other than Hoseok’s bright smile.

“So, I see you made it!” He pulled me into a hug. Not the ‘barely touch you because this is a little uncomfortable hug”, but a “I feel like we’ve known each other for years hug’.

“Hoseok, you’re incredible. The album is amazing, the release party is amazing, your outfit is amazing!” We pulled away from the hug and I could see a feint blush on his cheeks hidden well in the dimly lit room. “I’m serious, you may be the coolest person I know.”

“Yahhh, you’re boosting my ego too much.” He said while smiling shyly.

“You also may be the humblest person I know so I actually don’t think that is possible.” He smiled at me again and I swear I saw a glimpse of the actual sun in him.

“Do you know anyone here?”

“A few people, mostly through the grapevine.” He could sense my hesitancy right away, I could tell.          

“Come, I’ll introduce you to my friends.” He said as he gestured to the general direction behind him where his so-called friends were. Knowing him, his friends could be some ultra-famous idols that have better things to do than interacting with me. I could slowly feel the anxiety creep back up my spine, and my heartbeat slowly increased.

“I don’t really want to be a bother,” he looked down at me with squinted eyes and a tilted head. “I promise it’s okay, I like being alone and these appetizers are calling my name.”

He chuckled at me in disbelief, as if that was an insane thing to say in a room full of celebrities. I guess you could say a part of me is forgetting that they are just normal people too, so I shouldn’t be feeling this intimidated by them. At the same time, I’ve seen celebrities get starstruck over other celebrities, so they really aren’t just normal people and I am going to tell myself that my feelings are valid.

“C’mon, you’re never a bother. You’re my friend and I want my friends to meet you” he said reassuringly. I guess that answers my earlier internal debate. After 2 seconds of contemplation, I let myself believe him, and I signaled for him to lead the way. He lit up and tugged on my wrist so I could follow him.

I don’t know who I was expecting him to introduce me to, but for some reason his members stupidly did not come to mind. Three of the seven members of BTS were sitting on the stage together, and their heads all turned to Hoseok and I as we approached them. Despite all my inner turmoil, I take pride in my ability to pretend that I am confident and unfazed by everything. That is how I’ve done so well in my career while dealing with anxiety, but as the three idols studied us as we approached them, I could tell that mainting my persona would be more difficult than usual. I know them of course, because who doesn’t these days, but seeing them in person simply beats videos and pictures. They really were beautiful men.

“Yazmine this is Taehyung, Jimin and Jungkook. Guys this is Yazmine.” Hoseok introduced while gesturing to each of them.

“Hi guys its so great to meet you.” I said with a smile. Jungkook and Taehyung who were sitting raised themselves up to give me a bow as well as Jimin who was already standing as I shook my hands at them. “Oh! there’s no need for that we can be casual.”

“Sorry, it’s a habit,” Jimin said with a smile. “After all these years it feels kind of strange not to be formal.”

“That’s how I feel except opposite. Getting used to being formal was a challenge and I sometimes still forget the strict customs.” I explained.

“Sorry if this comes across as rude but you’re not Korean? You’re Korean is really good!” Taehyung questioned.

“It’s not rude at all! I am half Korean from my mom and my dad is middle eastern,” as I was explaining, someone summoned Hoseok over to them and he gave my arm a firm squeeze in parting as he nodded to his members insinuating his departure. “I was raised in the US till age 12 and I’ve been back and forth since then.” I explained as they nodded in understanding. It was endearing how intently they were listening to me, and for some reason I felt oddly at ease with the three. My eyes wandered over to Jungkook’s as I finished my explanation, and as they met he quicky looked away.

“Your interview with Hobi Hyung was amazing by the way,” Jimin said. In the moment I don’t think I even processed that Park Jimin watches my show, I’d have to do that later. “The idea is so new and exciting. I hope that you’ll invite me once I start my solo schedule.” There was a sly smirk on his face. I wondered if it would be inappropriate to tell him I would probably jump off a bus if he asked me to, but I decided to keep that to myself in the end.

“I’ll see what I could do.” I joked back. Out of the corner of my eye I saw someone new approaching us and I turned my head to find Seokjin. I was now surrounded by four members of the group and I am surprised I’ve held my composure for this long.

“Hello,” he says timidly with a subtle bow. “Sorry to interrupt, I just wanted to say bye to these three. I’m Jin.”

Just when I thought these men couldn’t get any better, he introduces himself as if I wouldn’t already know who he is. I gave a bow back and smiled at his humility, “I’m Yazmine, it’s nice to meet you.”

“Hey Jungkook, this must be exciting for you.” At the mention of the youngest members name, I turned to look at him and caught his wide eyes and small headshake towards Jin that I was clearly not meant to see as his eyes shifted to me. “He loves your videos. One time he made me watch three episodes of your trying new things series.”

“Hyung!” Jungkook cried out. Obviously I was not supposed to be filled in on this information, but my heart couldn’t help but beat a little faster at this new discovery.

“Oh, did he now?” I questioned with a smirk. Jungkook’s face twinged a subtle pink that was barely noticeable in the dimly lit room, but noticeable, nonetheless.

“Oh yeah, Jungkookie is always sending us clips from your videos,” Jimin teased. Taehyung started nodding his head enthusiastically and decided he also wanted to join in on teasing the youngest.

“You should have seen his reaction when he found out Hobi Hyung was making an appearance, he was so jeal-”

            “Okay that’s enough.” Jungkook interrupted with an annoyed expression. Despite how much I was enjoying this, I also felt a little bad for him, and I’m sure he’s been at the center of their teasing all these years.

            “Well, I really appreciate the support, and it means a lot coming from you especially.” I reassured him. He gave me a shy small in return.

            “Well it was nice to meet you Yazmine, I am sure we’ll run into each other again,” Jin said with a warm smile. “Before I leave Hobi wants a picture with all of us.” He said while gesturing to the other members. They all nodded in agreement.

            As they all turned to follow Jin, Jimin turned to me and nudged my arm with his. “Don’t go too far, we’ll be back soon.”

“I’ll be here.” I reassured. I definitely wasn’t comfortable enough to talk with anyone else here, and their welcoming energy was definitely more than enough for me. Jimin and Taehyung followed Jin, while I noticed Jungkook lingering a bit. I could tell he had something on his mind that he wanted to say.

            “Isn’t it a bit early for Jin to be leaving?” I questioned. This was my best attempt at making him comfortable enough to tell me what was on his mind.

            “This isn’t really Jin Hyungs scene, he doesn’t really know many people and he gets nervous meeting them too.” Jungkook explained. I almost did not catch the end of what he was saying because I was too distracted by his eyes. They really do sparkle just like everyone says.

            “Wow, if that’s how Jin feels then I really am hopeless.” I said in shock. If a literal bts member was having trouble socializing, I was doomed.

            “Not completely hopeless, you have us now.” He said with the most endearing smile I have ever seen. There was also something about how he said “You have us now”, as if he was insinuating that I would be in their lives longer than just a casual conversation at a party. I know it’s probably my delusion speaking, but it’s a nice thought to comfort me.  “By the way I really do enjoy your videos a lot. I guess it’s kinda embarrassingly obvious now that I am a fan.” He said with a little more confidence while referring to the teasing from his Hyungs.

            “If it makes you feel better, I have 3 older brothers, so I know how it feels. Also, I am slightly embarrassed because of how many stupid things you’ve probably seen me do. It’s actually all coming back now.” I laughed. I started internally second guessing every decision I made for my videos because Jeon fucking Jungkook watches them, and I pray that he has not seen the bird calling video.

            “What, like the bird calling video?” He says with a chuckle. This is not happening right now.

            “I am actually going to ignore what you just said for mental health reasons.” He lets out a boyish laugh at that and I swear I’ve never heard something more adorable in my life. I would honestly embarrass myself 100 times over if it meant that I could make him laugh.

            We both turn our heads at the call of his name and see the members waving him over for the pictures.

            “I’m sorry I don’t want to leave you alone…” He says hesitantly.

            “No, don’t worry about it,” I said. “I’ll just be here trying not to embarrass myself.”

            “I won’t take long so we can be embarrassing together.” He said in a teasing tone. My eyes couldn’t help but widen. I’m either crazy, or he just flirted with me. I could hear his giggle as he turned to walk away while I stood there stunned. The butterflies in my stomach were going crazy as I watched him join the others. Seeing them interact with each other was so special. They looked so happy and comfortable. It was hard not to be slightly envious of their relationship. I can’t remember the last time I had a connection like that with someone, and I could tell it was rare. My eyes naturally wander over to Jungkook as he wrapped his arm around Hoseok. I could see his eyes glistening even from here with joy and contempt. His eyes meet mine and I find myself unable to look away even though I know I’ve been caught staring. His eyes crinkle at the corners as we look at each other, waiting to see who will break eye contact first. My gaze wanders across his nose and cheeks as my face heats up. I force my eyes to meet his one final time and I turn away with a light feeling looming over me.

[fromtenthousandfeet]

https://x.com/97901_sue/status/1837382052729311473?t=AkNYU_IdWzar_rrDeie5Ew&s=19

Idk if he's achieved the money they were hoping his album would bring but he definitely got more fans than any other members. The songs that were chosen were of general public taste more than any other members'. Of course we know the Maknae line is already more Famous than others but he definitely gained a lot more fans like at least they succeeded in this. There's always some idols or other celebrities mentioning his songs and it's not just seven or not they do mention the b-sides as well. One thing i can say is that if currently there's one idol who's most popular then that's definitely him in general not talking about specific parts. The songs from Golden are known. I know the company pushing him helped A LOT but it's still about his vocal ability that i think attracts more ppl plus the choreo for those songs were also something that gp would love not too complicated not too easy. He Especially gained a lot more in sk cause so many idols mention him.

And i really hope someone won't say that I'm a jjk in disguise cause I'm not. Just saying what i saw. Would have said the same if it was any other member instead of him.

I'm really not convinced Jungkook picked up a ton of fans due to SEVEN or his album. Don't confuse successful marketing with actual committed fans.

Marketing exists for a reason - because it works! HYBE spent an INSANE amount of money marketing SEVEN, and Golden to a lesser extent. SEVEN was basically unavoidable if you were on TikTok. And if you weren't on that platform, you got hit by auto play on Spotify, or forced ads on YouTube. Hearing something enough times makes it familiar. Recognizing a song is kind of comforting. You may sing along even if you don't really love the song.

I get so many asks about Jungkook. Why me??? Stop, I beg you!

Here are my honest opinions about JK:

He's overhyped. At the end of the day, he's just a typical Gen Z dude in an extraordinary situation.

The songs I've heard from Golden sound dated and dull.

His voice is nothing special. I don't care how much training he's had. It's nasal and devoid of emotion. He sounds better when he sings in his lower register, but that doesn't work well in pop music, where almost all the male singers are tenors. His falsetto is unlistenable.

He's a mockingbird. He can mimic famous singers, but he himself has no signature sound or artistic point of view.

I'm not a fan of Taylor Swift. I don't hate her, but I don't actively search out her music. I'm fine listening to her songs when I hear them in public or on the radio. I think it's great that she's so successful. I'm totally fine with her enormous fandom. This is where I'm trying to get with Jungkook. It would be easy to feel indifferent to him and his potential success if all members of BTS were given equal treatment by the company. I would simply say, "congratulations on your success as a solo artist and good luck in your future endeavors." The problem, of course, is the fact that BigHit/HYBE openly sabotages Jimin, copies Jimin, and gives him the bare minimum of tools for success. They aren't really doing any favors for the remaining five members, either.

Jimin has something Jungkook doesn't have, and that's the most dedicated global fandom imaginable. It's an organized fandom who keep him on the charts despite the odds. Jungkook just has lots of tools, including basic pop songs specifically written for a western audience, infinite versions, covers, and remixes, and an unfathomable marketing budget, all of which almost guarantee his success. You just can't compare the two.

Yikes. I'm long winded as usual, but here's what I'd like to end with. I hope Jimin will continue to write his own music. I hope he will continue to dazzle us with his own style of dance, incorporating contemporary and street style. I hope he pushes boundaries. Jungkook can have the huge global pop star title. I am in no way obligated to consume his music or content. Equally, I won't mind if others do.

[borathae]

Chapter 6

HOSEOK BITCH STOP GRANDMA???? THATS A STRETCH AND KNOWING U ARE AN ANCIENT BEING, DAMN I-

Hoseok stumbles, colliding with Seokjin’s chest. ofc he laughs with his entire body FUCK I MISS HIM WTF NAH NOPE WE WONT CRY WE MUST STAY FOCUSED BROTHER

JIN U BETRAYED ME??? HOW COULD YOU

Seokjin pleads, giving you the biggest puppy eyes that man hates aegyo on command, but watch his ass do aegyo on command if its on run bts tasks 😭 ik he will be the most supportive one if you told bts you are selling feet pics

who calls their fraternity Alpha? What kind of superiority complex do they have?” 💯fr

What are you? Secret vampires or something?” um

So mysterious”, Hoseok says, ok ig

“that man can be an asshole.” WHAT DO U MEAN MY KITTY IS AN ASSHOLE????

dig his metaphorical fangs into your neck and drain you of your metaphorical blood WHAT DOES THAT MEAN??? (ik what it means, but 👀👀)

at least she got her sleep and is stress free now, i guess thats a win

JAMAL CHILL?? OOH JIN TELL EM SIS, WHATS HIS PROBLEM?

they are quaking with the desire to punch each other’s faces in. BE LESBIAN, PROBLEM SOLVED YEEHAW

Without me? homie really said that with his whole chest

It’s one of those activities you like to call terribly boring." ??? sir ??

also u know what, i will make it unboring for you real quick, lets go on a pirate ship, that will make u scream

dont judge my man yall, he was giving birth to lie on the pirate ship

WHAT DID TAE TELL HIM???? JAMAL SMILED AT ME??? his moodswings be like ➡️⬅️⬆️⬇️↗️↘️↙️↖️↕️↔️🔄️↪️↩️⤴️⤵️🔃

joon asks me out to study AAAAAAH 😩

holding his arm before you giggle into it. *twitching eyes WHY SHE GOTTA LIVE MY DREAM AAH BUTTER TAE THOSE ARMSS 🤤😋

“Oh you’re still here?” Taehyung asks STOP HE IS SOO SASSY, GIVE THAT MAN LONG NAILS

making Taehyung chuckle.......... one of his weirdly dishonest ones. tae when jin forces him to laugh at puns (that still makes me cackle)

He is a self-centred peacock PEACOCK DAMN GURL

“Violence is never the answer IT IS THE SOLUTION

ok sorry tae, back to serious mode, IS THAT FORESHADOW TO HIS PAST(mentioned in drabbles)

we are going swing dancing today UWUW

I can’t dance. What if I make a fool of myself?” I CANT DANCE EITHER, LETS GET MARRIED we can swing dance together for shits and giggles and get drunk in each other's laughter and smile, kissing passionately as if we are still in high school.

(omg that was so romantic, lemme just copy that)

did i tell you i still love the way he talks, its so coquette, in a manly way

I am a terrible student. i got exams in a month i have barely studied 😃😭

time does really fly fr it does, you wish it went fast, but when you think back, you wish you could live in that moment one more time

“cake is quite the delicacy oof the fanciness

ah yes old stuff *sighs in delight and coziness

There is fog in the air. It got stuck on the rooftops of the houses. Like a perfect gradient it makes them disappear into a grey nothingness. if this scene was on tv, what color light would it have?? (background lights you know) i was thinking of yellow, since we are talking about antiques

“I guess…” you look out the window for quite some time to think of an answer. You look at the perfectly polished stones of the sidewalk. You watch how the rain builds little rivers in the nooks and crannies. And that is when you get your answer. and the lights slowly becomes cool and blue (blue for calm, unity and stability)

thats a nice perspective of history but for the love of god, i cant stay awake or mentally present during it 😭

With your cheeks burning up like crazy and a big smile on your face you look out of the window again. A swing song comes on the radio, Taehyung turns it louder the tiniest bit. AND THE LIGHTS TURN PINK

“N-no? I-I’m alright”, you stutter. we can see that

Taehyung gets a few (probably painful) steps on his toes, but he doesn’t say anything. MASOCHIST ALERT 😭

stop flattering me im shyyyyy *shakes booty like jimin

this is so cute bye im soo single

“this was like in the movies! Do it again!” SHE IS SOO CUTE UWUW MOVE TAE SHE IS MINE *hits the gym so i can yeet tae out of the way and carry her

HE DID IT AGAIN HEEEHEEEEHEHHE

“Okay but that throwing thing you did? You can’t just do that without training first. Also why are you so strong? It’s inhuman really.” SAY IT SIS

I just think you are beyond precious”BYE IM GONE

Why do an elderly lady and Taehyung know each to such extent that they are hugging as if they were two old friends reuniting? dont overthink, they are just besties, um they met on a idk metro yeah

“it’s been so many years and yet you still look the same. While look at me”, OBVIOUSLY ITS SUS

Perhaps I should have taken the offer back then.” 👀👀

“What offer?” um the plastic surgery offer, anti aging laser. HERBS YEAH IT WAS THE HERBS, SHE MISSED OUT ON AN HERBAL MASSAGE

No way! That’s splendid! Just what you dreamt of!” they are such cute besties pls

It is hard not to choke on your olive, not when your body is burning up like that. i choked on air

How is it?” WHY IS THIS SOO HOT STOP DONT FOLD THAT FAST BITCH NA UH *also folds like a lawn chair in a sec

Taehyung gets off the barstool and closes the distance between you and him. SIR MY MENTAL HEALTH???

you stutter, knees buckling slightly as he helps you stand up. SLIGHTLY???? u mean buckling like a trying on heels

You haven’t told anyone ever but in your dreams you always pictured your prince charming to be good with elderly people and kids. Not that you would tell anyone your stupid fantasies, but you really did picture him like that. we all do, tae is a prince charming *sighs in high standards

“I think you gave that lady proper heart palpitations fr, i got so giddy just reading

And so full of life”, 👀👀👀as opposed to what sir???

Taehyung seems properly flustered for a moment, eyes flitting downwards and blinking rapidly. YES WE GOT THE CUTIE PIE FLUSTERED YEEHAW THIS IS A WIN FOR THE GAYS AND UNGAYS (i love to use this in sentences unrelated to sexuality)

quite sad to think that we are looking at something which has died thousands of years ago ... Well if you say it like that mood sis

it is nice to know that we can look at the past when we look at the stars?” waaaah im in love with her

I always thought of them as a reminder of death”, “or rather hell.” AYO??👀👀

they are still burning bright. Mustn’t it be such a burden to never get to rest?” ooh

*starts playing love maze

“Then you mess up, you mustn’t worry about mistakes you haven’t even made yet” i will try to remember this all the time

because right now I am thinking that this lamp is also alone, surrounded by darkness and thick fog and it should feel so terribly lonely and yet here it is, outshining both of them." 

HOW DO U WRITE THIS WELL?? LEAVE US SOME TALENT CRUMBS

People normally aren’t happy when they are around you and finally experiencing it feels so good.  WHO HURT YOU POOKIE??? IM COMING WITH MY FRYING PAN

this is soo cute i cant, the writing, them, the lamp and the stars gosh, i feel so giddy i wanna spin around the lamppost like a simp does in music videos

Yes darling” Taehyung whispers and there is obvious seduction in his voice. OHO HO HO I SEE U NAUGHTY BOI

this was a cute chapter im gonna sleep soo good with idk grass and unicorns in my dreams

HOSEOK BITCH STOP GRANDMA???? THATS A STRETCH AND KNOWING U ARE AN ANCIENT BEING, DAMN I-

lmoaoao he is so mean for no reason fajsdfja I love him JFAJDFJ

Hoseok stumbles, colliding with Seokjin’s chest. ofc he laughs with his entire body FUCK I MISS HIM WTF NAH NOPE WE WONT CRY WE MUST STAY FOCUSED BROTHER

LISTEN I MISS HIM TOO OMFG I'M IN PAIN

Seokjin pleads, giving you the biggest puppy eyes that man hates aegyo on command, but watch his ass do aegyo on command if its on run bts tasks 😭 ik he will be the most supportive one if you told bts you are selling feet pics

I miss him so much 😭 BUT ALSO LESS THAN A MONTH TILL HE IS BACK OMGMGMG (the most supportive for feet pics would be Tae though change my mind. you can't.)

who calls their fraternity Alpha? What kind of superiority complex do they have?” 💯fr

no but it will ALL MAKE SENSE LIKE LIKE LIEK LIEKEKE LIKEKE

“that man can be an asshole.” WHAT DO U MEAN MY KITTY IS AN ASSHOLE????

the foreshADOWINGNNG (i said too much)

dig his metaphorical fangs into your neck and drain you of your metaphorical blood WHAT DOES THAT MEAN??? (ik what it means, but 👀👀)

HELLOOOOOOOOOO

Without me? homie really said that with his whole chest

THE JEALOUSY of this man LIKE

It’s one of those activities you like to call terribly boring." ??? sir ??

i love their sass fr fjadsjf

WHAT DID TAE TELL HIM???? JAMAL SMILED AT ME??? his moodswings be like ➡️⬅️⬆️⬇️↗️↘️↙️↖️↕️↔️🔄️↪️↩️⤴️⤵️🔃

perhaps something with her metaphorical blood HELLOO

joon asks me out to study AAAAAAH 😩

AAAH (scared)

holding his arm before you giggle into it. *twitching eyes WHY SHE GOTTA LIVE MY DREAM AAH BUTTER TAE THOSE ARMSS 🤤😋

when this video dropped I lost IT

ok sorry tae, back to serious mode, IS THAT FORESHADOW TO HIS PAST(mentioned in drabbles)

mhmhmmhmh

time does really fly fr it does, you wish it went fast, but when you think back, you wish you could live in that moment one more time

YES THIS OMFG the most painful thing ever 😭

ALSO I love how you thought of different colours during the scene <3 I love this energy heheh <3

Taehyung gets a few (probably painful) steps on his toes, but he doesn’t say anything. MASOCHIST ALERT 😭

there are no lies to be found here tbfh

“this was like in the movies! Do it again!” SHE IS SOO CUTE UWUW MOVE TAE SHE IS MINE *hits the gym so i can yeet tae out of the way and carry her

NO BUT THANK YOU i LOVE HER SO MUCH she is so cute frrr

“it’s been so many years and yet you still look the same. While look at me”, OBVIOUSLY ITS SUS

it IS

lmaooao you losing it over Tae existing is so me fr

it is nice to know that we can look at the past when we look at the stars?” waaaah im in love with her

me fr

I always thought of them as a reminder of death”, “or rather hell.” AYO??👀👀

THE FORESHADOWING GOES CRAZY FR ps: i forgot the stars and photography part during this chapter and now im <3 holy moly they were so cute together in the beginning im so soft

People normally aren’t happy when they are around you and finally experiencing it feels so good.  WHO HURT YOU POOKIE??? IM COMING WITH MY FRYING PAN

NO BUT FR

this is soo cute i cant, the writing, them, the lamp and the stars gosh, i feel so giddy i wanna spin around the lamppost like a simp does in music videos

I'M HAPPY YOU LOVED IT SO MUCH HEHEHE 💜💜

[ataraxetta]

Three of Bruce's Audio Logs from the Gotham Knights game that hit me like a punch. The first is directly after Barbara's injury and mostly about Jason's death, the next is about missing Dick and wishing he could make things right between them, and the third is about Jason coming back into the fold and some Lazarus Pit pondering. Text is below under the cut, but Bruce's voice actor does some amazing work here with adding emotional depth, so I suggest listening if it is a thing you might be into!

LOG ENTRY BT-45 - SPIRAL

"Log entry BT-42...

Alfred, I can't do this. Not now.

[Alfred: If you don't make time for this now, Master Bruce, then when will you? Take all the time you need.]

I didn't know so much could go wrong. There's nowhere else I can go. Dick stopped by Gotham again. Our meetings lately have been...strained. I pushed him away. And this time I don't know if he'll ever come back. He worried about my 'obsessions.' But I wasn't focused nearly enough. If I was, then Barbara--

She got hurt. Paralyzed. Maybe permanently. Because she was trying to help me. I let her take on too much. I should have been there. I Failed her. Barbara, and Dick, and... Jason.

Jason barely got a chance. He could have been great for Gotham. The best kind of Robin. But he was reckless. Rushing into danger like that--No. I'm responsible for this. After being too strict with Dick, I tried to give Jason more freedom. I should have been paying more attention. He went off on his own to be a hero. Then that monster MURDERED him for it.

He was killed because of me.

I'd do anything to fix this. Things I said I'd never do.

Like speak with Talia again. I swore to myself I'd NEVER consider using a Lazarus Pit. The risks, even compared to death, were too great. But I had to know if resurrection was even possible. But when I tracked her down, I couldn't even ask for her help. One more thing I got wrong. And Talia just laughed. I broke almost every rule I have to bring Jason back. And I have nothing to show for it. He's really gone."

Sixteen...

Batman failed-- I failed everyone.

I don't know how to make any of this right. But I'm going to find a way."

LOG ENTRY BT-70 - FATHER AND GRAYSON

"Log entry BT-70.

I don't often have dreams. But this morning, I woke up from one about Nightwing.

Dick came back to Gotham. We sat right here in this room. Together. He let me explain myself, apologize for pushing him away. I found all the words I should have said before he left. That's how I knew none of it was real. He asked me about something we used to talk about. Batman's legacy. You know, 'who wears the cowl when Bruce Wayne can't?'

For years, I thought I had the answer. Every time I looked at Dick Grayson, I saw the next Batman.

But Dick never wanted it.

I've been monitoring his activities in Bludhaven. It's amazing what he's accomplished on his own. His way. With courage and kindness. I see it clearly now. I don't want Nightwing to become Batman. I need Batman to be more like Nightwing.

Despite everything, I just wish he was home, so we could talk. REALLY talk. I'd tell him how proud I really am. That Nightwing is the better version of what Batman was meant to be. That because of Dick Grayson, Bruce Wayne became a better man.

I'd tell my son that I miss him.

I'll tell him the next time he comes back. He doesn't need me bothering him.

He doesn't need me at all."

LOG ENTRY BT-57 - BACK FOR GOOD

"It's been two months since I confronted Red Hood.

Wanted Criminal. Confirmed Killer. Jason.

At first, I didn't want to believe it. But after that shock came hope. He's still driven by a sense of justice. There's still a part of him I can recognize as Robin.

He's talking to me, but... he's so angry. Not so much at his murderer, but at me.

I deserve his anger. He was just a child when I put him in harm's way. I pushed him too hard, too fast. He's made it clear that he'll never let go of his desire for vengeance. But he's come to understand that violence has its limits.

I can only be grateful Jason's meeting me halfway. He's accepted counseling. We're finding a way to move forward. He's even suggested we work on a new kind of pistol for him, together. Something that's more... Bat-friendly. I have some reservations about that, but he insists it's possible, and his prototypes are promising. He's making an incredible effort to come back from that cliff, to be a better man.

So far, I've been unable to find out what happened between Jason's murder and his appearance on Gotham's streets as the Red Hood. His amnesia seems total, but not necessarily irreversible. Maybe with time he'll remember...

Alfred and I ran every test we could think of. The last one confirmed my suspicions. We found evidence he'd been exposed to a Lazarus Pit. Was Jason revived by Ra's? Talia? Another faction or cult?

Ra's has healed his injuries, no matter how severe, in Lazarus Pits. Ongoing exposure has rendered him practically immortal, though at the cost of his humanity. Ra's original goal when he founded the League was to destroy a corrupted society to then rebuild it in a purer form. Now, he seems to have lost sight of any reconstruction. He views all human beings as irredeemably flawed, even Talia.

For all his anger, Jason is nothing like that. My working theory is that a single, short exposure to a Lazarus Pit won't cause a permanent shift in personality. But I need to learn more, for Jason's sake.

I won't lose him again."

[namjjuice]

I've never made a post like this, so please bare with me 😭😭

Introduction

Hello, I'm JJ. I'm 18 (will be 19 soon) and I've been doing literate roleplay for about a decade. I've had a couple of different roleplay partners over the years, but for the most part, I've had a singular consistent partner this entire time (my now boyfriend). I'm in my first year of uni for a medical degree, as well as working a job, but I usually roleplay 5+ times per day, even more if we're both actively typing and I'm really into it lol. I'm in EST, and I tend to go to bed around midnight, but again, I often force myself to stay up to get a few more responses in if the plot is really good ^_^.

Requirements

I do request that you be at least 18, as I do like nsfw plots! I understand that if you're under that age, you may also like that (as i did), but I just personally don't feel comfortable role-playing that with someone underage.

My second requirement is that you are at least somewhat literate. I usually roleplay on Instagram, but I'm definitely more open to discord until we develop more of a friendship due to it offering more anonymity. I usually write ~600 words per response, but it can and will vary based on your responses. What I will not do is a 10+ paragraph response. I just personally feel that a lot of the aspects of role-playing that I enjoy, like playing off of one another, gets lost really easily like that.

My RP Interests

NSFW (we can talk more specifically in private 💔)

Horror themes (gore, horror movie killers, body horror)

OCs

Fandom

Any opportunity to include medical terminology :3

I usually do MxM, but I'm trans, so my characters often also end up being trans. I'm also willing to do FxM and FxF if the plot is good, but I think it's important to keep in mind that I AM a gay man, so take that as you will.

Some Fandoms I'm personally in include:

Valorant

BTS

Hannibal NBC

DSMP (literally only pumpkinduo I got into it this year)

Hazbin

I will say that I have gotten into fandoms specifically because someone wanted to roleplay it T_T so even if it's not here, it may just be something that I don't rp in as much or something you could suggest if you're really wanting it.

Feel free to message me on here and we can talk to see if we're a good match! I don't check Tumblr that often, but I'll be on the lookout :)

And in case you didn't read it before, IM A MAN. I know some people aren't comfortable with that, so I'm making sure it's absolutely seen. That is all.

[mimibwi]

BTS shippergate

(lol I just like saying xyzgate about any little drama so here we go.)

What is shipper’s issue with Taehyung recently and when did he become public enemy #1?? I am definitely on the 'Taehyung is smarter than people give him credit for' train but never did I think he was the evil mastermind some people think he is. Are we all really being serious or are a lot of your complaints about him colored in a jikooker, taekooker, taennie, y/n lens?? I’d go with the latter cause the things some of the aforementioned groups of people have said about Taehyung in the past few months can only be cooked up in a cauldron of delusion.

Let’s get this straight— Taehyung is not interacting with his friends/group mates (who he’s known for 10+ years, mind you) to feed shippers. It’s the way y’all will go to war with this idea that Tae wants to use Jungkook to cover up his alleged relationship. First of all, you’re giving him way too much credit. Who do you think Taehyung is that he can use Jungkook or Jimin or any other member for that matter, and keep doing it for as long as you claimed he has, without that member saying something about it. Do you think Jungkook is so scared of Taehyung that he can’t tell him to not mention his name on weverse? You always talk about “he knows how much hate Jungkook and Jimin get when he does this” does he? Now I’m not saying the boys are totally oblivious on the matter of ships but I definitely don’t think they see as much as y’all think they do. A lot of the things shippers talk about are very niche things that you would have to actively seek out for the most part, at least based on my experience. And this is just the english side of things, I don’t really know what the shipper climate is like on the korean side so it’s hard for me to entertain the idea that he knows about the things we (girl idek much) know about and doesn’t care. It’s also interesting to me that this claim is coming from jkkers when Jimin was treated similarly for years every time he so much as breathe in JK’s direction. i thought y’all will understand but I guess you’re fighting fire with fire…

But before we even get into all of that, why are we here in the first place? Why can’t we ever take anything the guys say or do just as it stands? I’d be with you guys if it was only silly little jokes but it isn’t. You guys are taking it so seriously and starting one sided beef with a man who probably wouldn’t know what you’re talking about. Why can’t something that was meant to be a joke between friends not just come across as such to you unless it fits your narrative? Why can’t two friends go to a movie premiere without it being seen as either a big ‘coming out’ moment or a PR stunt and nothing in between? (it can be because we saw 94z at an event and no one acted this weird, it’s always the maknaes smh) It’s because many shippers have reduced everything these men post, say or do as a hint of their relationship. Not everything they do has to do with a ship, whether you think that ship is real or is being used as a cover for some other relationship. Taehyung can post Jungkook on insta just because he wants to, he can talk about him 25/8 and no one should care unless JK says he has a problem with it. It’s just that many times shippers draw baseless conclusions from things that don’t even matter. It comes from that inability to separate the fact presented in front of you from the stories you make up in your minds. If this doesn’t change I can see this continuing to be a problem. We’ll see the same cycle of events occur if JK or Jimin ever end up in rumors like this (gawd i hope not, i’ve aged 64 years) because you guys refuse to leave room for deniability. I am not saying this as someone who thinks they’re holier than thou for not shipping the members but i’m saying this as a shipper myself. You cannot believe in a ship 100% because we do not know these people’s life, all we see is barely 4%.

*sighs* #makeshippingfunagain. lol has it ever been fun with BTS though? Things were already in the trenches when I got here:/.

Now taekookers who are switching up on Tae. I must say— this one is on you and i don’t know what else to tell you.

I’m not gonna repeat myself too many times cause this all comes down to the fact that you lot convinced yourself FOR YEARS that Tae so much as looking in JK’s direction meant he was hinting that they were married and in love. Taehyung has never told y’all explicitly that he was dating JK (if anything he’s showed signs that he isn’t, but let’s talk about this another day) so it’s not his problem that all your walls are now cracking. I think the state of that ship rn shows that a lot of y’all didn’t really like Taekook in the first place cause how does one of them possibly being in a different relationship cause y’all to jump ship so quick. Now I’m not telling you to start more discourses to deny Taennie, let it rest i beg. What i’m saying is Taekook still exists. Taehyung can have 20 *confirmed* girlfriends and 10 *confirmed* boyfriends and Taekook will still exist because at the end of the day they’re friends before anything else. But i guess if I was also preaching and fighting with others FOR YEARS about my ship being real I will also be throwing a temper tantrum right now. Anyway, if y’all are leaving you can just do it quietly, all of this is uncalled for. You’re just embarrassing yourselves.

Unto my last point, Taehyung isn’t obligated to be some protector of Jennie on the internet. They’re both involved in this mess and if any of them wanted to say anything or protect each other from their fans being equally as nasty to the other, they both have the means and platforms to do so. I don’t get this double standard that Tae has to protect her while she can just go about doing whatever she wants. And it’s honestly so dumb to be advocating for Jennie when (if we’re assuming they’re in a long term, loving relationship) she can just as easily tell her man what she wants/needs from him and whatever happens there is really not our concern. It’s also ridiculous cause what do you want him to do?? I’m genuinely curious.

Anyway i’m gonna end here because there’s no way I can go on without this giving me a stress ulcer. It’s not like I was surprised by any of this (y’all are predictable), I knew Tae would get hated no matter what he did after Paris and it’s going to keep happening once all of this is still in the air. Now, I get this whole taenniegate thing is a big deal, it’s confusing as shit and I acknowledge that. I can even acknowledge people having thoughts and opinions on the matter because we’re only human but some people, on every side you can think of, have definitely lost the plot. Let’s get it together!

~~🐝

^^if you hate him you will die and go to hell btw:))

[hocusbogus]

Journal Entry: 8 May 2023 (Monday)

I did a Tumblr cleanup earlier, got rid of my followings, people literally weren’t updating for like a decade, hahaha can’t believe some of us are still here right? It’s been long abandoned. I’m still around mainly because this is my safe space of which I can just journal without worrying about people reading it, some may, but let’s be real it’s like talking to the void. Most of us no longer have the attention spans to be reading long blog posts like this, I myself included. My attention span for content consumption has reduced dramatically since 2020, I can barely sit through one movie without wanting to combust.

I remember being so active on Tumblr, I would scroll endlessly and it genuinely did felt like a community, I had a few Tumblr friends. I kinda miss that, but now we are more wary of who we talk to online, as we should.

I haven’t been out since yesterday, and I don’t know... not being out and about could sometimes take a toll on me, because I feel like I need the sun and to be with people. But at the same time I like not doing anything and staying in, maybe I’m just having ADHD Paralysis.

I’m looking forward to Jakarta so much, damn I really am, counting days, also I’m missing Bangtan a lot, like all 7 together. They’re such comfort to me, been watching Run BTS episodes.

Also been feeling rather nostalgic recently, I think it’s definitely because of mercury retrograde, whenever it comes around I would always feel this type of way.

A friend of mine is going through something, with his dad, his dad is sick and battling for his life, I just feel highly empathetic, I just feel so heavy for him. At the same time I’m sending strong energy to him and his family hoping that they’ll go through this with courage and acceptance. It is something that all human must go through and I just hope that we’re all able to be with each other when we’re going through such a painful human experience.

I also had a recent realization about children, I used to say that I do not like kids, and I saw this one tik tok that explained that usually when we feel that way it is because we haven’t done the work to heal ourselves. I didn’t get to be a kid, I have always been expected to mature, I was like the third parent. I had to self regulate and parent myself at a young age as I was raised by narcisstic and traumatized parents who are not emotionally sound. Hence, when I saw kids that “misbehave” or not acting like what I think they should be acting, I get triggered. I realized now that I was simply reacting to my past trauma.

Children deserves to be children and be validated and cared for by the adults in their life, they aren’t supposed to know everything and behave like adults because they’re not adults. With that realization, I have became more compassionate towards children, yes I may still get annoyed it’s not an easy thing to unlearn but there is that spark in me that made me feel more empathy towards them.

I also try to live in the present more and detach from future outcomes, appreciating the past but not letting it be the shackle that I carry into the future. Can’t wait for Jupiter to move into Taurus.

[selfproducingfanfictionauthor]

BTS Scenario: An omega arrives in your pack (Hyungline x alpha/beta fem!reader)

Summary:  An omega joining a pack is a blessing - an unmated one is a miracle. So when the village elder came to you not with authority in her eyes but pity and pleading for understanding, you had no choice but to let him go.

Or, an omega joins the pack and you’re an alpha/beta in a relationship with another alpha. The community asks for your sacrifice. Warnings/Notes: Implied Smut, slight ass play, Angst, Drabble (no resolution... yet) I wanted to explore a different dynamic in the ABO Universe, since it’s usually Alpha BTS x Omega Reader but how about the Beta or even the Alpha reader? Hope you enjoy!  Word Count: 2k+ (500 per drabble) 

KIM SEOKJIN 

(after he’s called to participate in the matching, and Jungkook is an unmated male omega who’s always had a crush on you) (though crush is a understatement)

He’s here for a final goodbye, you think as you allow him to push you back against the wall.

He kisses you with desperation, all teeth and tongue, as if he wants to devour you whole. He reeks of her but you push it at the back of your mind, together with your instinct to gain the upper hand.

If this is goodbye, let it be as soft as you two could be.

You close your eyes to blink back the tears and wrap your arms around his neck. You match his passion kiss after kiss until you both are panting, breathing in each other.

Seokjin slows it down and pulls at your shirt, slipping it off your head. His eyes are wan, and he hasn’t met your gaze the whole time. It feels wrong, but then again, everything is.

So you try to bring back some normalcy and let the urgency in your touch show. Your arms slid down his shoulder, pushing him back into your room, your strength easily matching his.

In the dark of the room, you tug at his shirt but Seokjin grasps your hand away from his chest. You thought he’s going to lead you to his cock just as he did many times before, but he pulls you closer until there’s no more space between your chest and his and leads your hand to his hole.

He’s dry as the dessert but her pushes your hand closer, until your fingers tap his puckered hole.

You can feel him force himself not to tense up, breathing deeply and dropping his head to your shoulder. His back is caved over you, like a tall child and he turns to graze his lips against your ear.

“I’ll let you fuck me too, if that’s what you want, jagi.”

Your eyes widen and you try to pull your hand away but he holds it still. Your other hand tries to push his chest away but his other arm wraps around your shoulder blades, unwilling to let go.

He keeps still in the crook of your neck, murmuring words you never imagined you’ll hear from the alpha, “I’ll moan like he did. Beg like he did.” His voice shakes, and you startle at the tears wetting your skin. It doesn’t even occur to you to wonder how he knew about Jungkook, and what had transpired the night before because here he is.

He’s crying. Your alpha is crying.

“Just please don’t leave me.”

MIN YOONGI 

(Your love for Yoongi knows no bounds, you can give him this. In which your arranged marriage is thwarted.)

“It’s a good thing we’re not bonded yet, huh?”

You try not to wince at the relief in his voice and instead you laugh, hoping that the dark is enough to conceal the wobble on your lip.

You are both lying on your bed, exhausted by your hours long of… what do you call it again? Ah, he did call it his favorite recreational activity. He figured sexual compatibility is an important factor in arrange marriages earlier on your engagement.

And you, in love with him for more than half your life, said yes.

His fingers are playing with your hair, while his other hand lifts a lit cigarette to his lips. He glances down at you, his cat-like eyes half-lidded.

“You want a smoke?”

Pulling the blanket higher to your chest, relishing in the slight flicker of interest in his eyes, you shake your head. “Actually, can you not smoke on my bed tonight?”

Yoongi raises an eyebrow but says nothing and puts out his cigarette against the ash tray on your bedside table. Usually, you take up on his offer, and he’s not gonna lie and say that the image of your lips around a cigarette doesn’t stir his cock alive.

“Not feeling well?” He asks, the only time you refused his offer was whenever you’re feeling the drop after your activities. But usually, you’ll tell him outright, communication being as open as you both could.

You let a small smile touch your lips at his tone. He cares for you, you know, maybe not as much as you want him to, but it’s enough.

Or it used to be enough.

“Just a mild migraine,” you lie before pressing a kiss against his shoulder.

Yoongi smiles and kisses the crown of your head, “You know what cures migraines?”

Your smile grows wider as you look up to his grin, his hand already sliding down the small of your back under your blankets. “I think I have an idea.”

By the time he’s pulled out 3 more orgasms from you, the moon has started fading from the night sky. The brisk winter air entering your room by the open window, drawing goosebumps on your skin.

Beside you, Yoongi sits up and pulls his shirt over his head.

“You’re not staying the night?”

Yoongi shakes his head, “The trials start the day after tomorrow, I’ve got to get a head start.”

Your press your lips together, your hand sneaking down your belly. You imagine your child, the size of a pea, hoping they do not hear your breaking heart. “I thought you didn’t like being choices taken away from you.”

That was one of the major points of discussion when your parents arranged your marriage. It’s also a source of your many arguments at the start, before slowly becoming some sort of unwanted roommate in your makeshift relationship.

Yoongi pauses, there’s something in your voice that he can’t pinpoint. He turns to you, for once, you are unreadable. “This is different.”

“Oh,” you breathe. How so, you want to ask. How come a choice robbed by our secondary natures so much different than the ones robbed by our parents? How come it’s the lesser evil in your eyes?

How come I was never a palatable choice in the first place?

But you don’t. Instead, Yoongi presses on. “At least now, you know, if it turns out that it’s me, you’re free. You can go to university just like you want.”

“Yeah…” you chuckle dryly, “Well, good luck then.”

You don’t beg him to stay, you’re an alpha too and an alpha protects their pack. As your hand travels down to your belly again, you remember - you have your own to protect now too.

JUNG HOSEOK 

(You’re just his best friend. What can you say?)

“She smells like lilacs! No, wait, honey! Honey and cream.” Hoseok sighs, all lovestruck on your couch over the new omega girl in town.

As part of the search party that found her, he hasn’t stopped talking about her for weeks. Giving you updates on her recovery in the beginning, and then her smile, her eyes, and the way she laughs as time went by.

At first, you didn’t mind. An omega joining the pack is a blessing, given their rarity. They symbolize fertility and bounty, and you are nothing if not loyal to the community. You foster the village children as their teacher, you teach them the ropes of the land - how to feed the cows, how to plant the seeds, and how to prepare for harvest - after all.

But as time went by, as Hoseok’s visits to her home frequent and his visits to yours lessen, it’s become harder and harder to keep the bitter thoughts away. Hoseok may still visit you, but when was the last time you two talked about anything other than her?

“The trials for her mate starts next week,” Hoseok starts, almost as if waiting for you to say something, “I’m thinking of participating.”

From the kitchen, you tighten your hold on the tray balancing your tea and snacks. Without a wobble, you inquire as you step back into your living room, “Oh?”

“Yeah,” he picks up one of your cookies, suddenly looking all bashful, “I’m unmated and I’m not getting younger so, might as well give it a shot you know?”

You frown behind your tea cup, “We’re barely past our mid-20s, Seok-ie, that hardly qualifies as old.”

Hoseok leans back and tilts his head on the back of your couch until it hangs in relaxation. “It’s different between you and I.”

It’s true, betas are not so pressured to reproduce early. After all, there’s nothing special to be had in your genes, you think bitterly.

“Besides,” he continues, “I think I like her. You know, maybe we should invite her next time we hang out! You can get to know her too!”

“I’d rather not.” It spills over your lips before you could control it, and Hoseok stiffens before turning his gaze to you.

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you’re jealous.” Hoseok teases, unaware at how his words hit home.

You stiffen, biting your lip before the dam breaks. “Maybe I am.” you whisper.

He blinks in surprise at the feebleness of your tone, “B-but… you’re a beta.”

You know. You know your place, in this village and in his life but somehow it’s different hearing it from him. Standing, you  turn away to step back into your kitchen when a hand grasps your wrist.

“I don’t understand.” Hoseok whispers, trying to look up to your face but thwarted by your hair. He doesn’t need to see your watering eyes to know there are tears in them. He’s reeling from the sudden change of atmosphere, smelling your distress in the air.

Suddenly, you’re overwhelmed by the sense of inferiority and your heart caves into itself. With the last of your strength, you shake off his hold, pointing to the door.

“I think it’s best you leave.”

KIM NAMJOON 

(Namjoon has always been a man of duty, and though you are tough and strong, there are limits to what you can and will endure)

You pride yourself to be level-headed, calm, and objective unlike many of the alphas in the pack. You’ve never lost your control, or flown into fury even during your youth but at this very moment, you summon all your discipline to keep your lips from pulling back and snarling at the older alpha in front of you.

How dare she?

How dare they ask this of you?

“It is his duty.” She repeats and beside you, Namjoon is silent. Eyes straight ahead, back as rigid as the trees outside your home. The home that you two built for your children that will come after your wedding.

The wedding that’s supposed to be in a month.

But the longer Namjoon stays silent, the farther that future seems to be. By the time the elder leaves your home, you don’t even see a speck of it in your mind’s eye.

The silence continue as you clean up the cups and uneaten rice cakes. The silent clink of the utensils echoing in your quaint home.

As you wash the dishes, you feel like an outsider watching your body go through the motions. Scrubbing the plate clockwise, once, twice, three times, before running it under the faucet. Next, you pick up the cups, here, clockwise, once, twice —

“It is my duty,” you hear Namjoon, and oh, he’s beside you, hand on your wrist, pulling your hands away from the frigid waters, “you know that, right?”

As one of the strongest and wisest alphas this pack has ever seen in generations, your betrothal to Namjoon was tolerated at best. Alpha bondings are common nowadays, with the scarcity of omegas. So yes, your betrothal was tolerated - just tolerated, even with you being as strong and as wise as your betrothed - but now?

With that young omega in the picture?

They are making you feel as if you’ve committed a grave sin against the community, as if it’s not within your rights to rage against the unfairness of it all.

They’re asking you for your love.

And he’s so willing to be taken away. Your heart breaks but you nod quietly, “I know. I understand.”

Namjoon stupidly thought that was the end of it. That you knew he’ll always come back to you, omega or not.

Maybe he was naive, or he truly was selfish to ask it of you but when he gets home the week after the trials to a dark cold house the surprise knocks him to his knees and drops his heart to his stomach.

You left the kitchen untouched, his mug still next to yours but, Namjoon pauses at the threshold of your room. There, glinting under the moonlight, sits your ring and the last of your scent wafts away.

END NOTES:  Hearts are appreciated but comments are gold. Let me know if this should have a second (or even third) part! :) 

[glowyjellyfish]

I have been thinking about FF7 yesterday and today for some reason, and read a bunch of discussion, and now I wanna talk about Reeve. Yet again. I can’t remember how much of this I have actually posted before, as I have a tendency to get rambly when I write things up and then cut them back. Maybe I’d be better off looking for discussion on Reddit, but I’m more comfortable here. I’m curious whether my headcanons and concept of him are even accurate within the larger compilation—I went too deep and am trying to temper my expectations.

1. He’s my favorite. He was my favorite before I formed all these headcanons and theories over the last couple years, so it probably won’t distress me too much if I’m 100% wrong. Maybe. Always been fascinated with the double life dichotomy and the contradiction with Serious Competent Businessman whose alter ego is a Silly Magic Cat Robot.

2. Soooo a few years ago, probably before Remake was even announced but definitely within the last decade or so, I read the Ultimania BTS that the concept for Reeve was that he controlled Cait Sith with a magic ability. I don’t know what the Compilation has to add on the subject (beyond “Reeve definitely makes and controls robots”), but I quickly realized that this actually works better in the OG than the more common assumption that he’s got like, remote devices or something. You don’t hold two completely separate conversations at once and get confused about who you’re talking to and when, with each side only getting select parts of the conversation, if you are using a remote and talking into a mic. Honestly I don’t know how Reeve even could have pulled off the simultaneous conversation with Scarlet and Heidgger and everyone on the Highwind without bare minimum Cait Sith’s control device being implanted in his brain and controlled mentally. Not to mention all the times Cait Sith casually slips into clearly speaking directly from Reeve’s perspective. So as you can see, this rapidly became my headcanon for him, and I don’t think it’s actively contradicted anywhere. They just... don’t talk about how he actually controls his robots.

3. So I started writing stuff about that into my FF7/FF8 crossover fic, which injected new life into what was before just a little collection of script scenes with nowhere in particular to go. This led to Reeve developing a solid arc in that fic, feeling out of place because he can’t fight, struggling to continue hiding his ability because he can’t imagine not hiding it but at the same time he can’t not use it and feels like it’s his only asset, finally confessing in an attempt to prevent everyone’s cover stories from unraveling, and getting shipped to Esthar with Ellone for his trouble. There’s a lot more to it, but that’s the basics, and his arc ended up driving a lot of the plot I have so far.

4. I ended up constantly reassessing my concept of how Reeve is as a person in the lead up to Remake, and the way he was portrayed informed my current position and led to my Cait Sith to the Rescue fanfic (actually called Trust. Probably.) Before this, I had a lot of theories about Reeve maybe being coerced or blackmailed into spying, because it’s odd he would add “spy via magic robot” to his already very full plate. But Remake showed me Reeve is angry. And he’s frustrated that he can’t change anything even from his position, and he’s willing to do whatever he can under the radar. And then I realized it actually makes a lot more sense if Reeve uses Cait Sith to covertly join Avalanche. Sincerely and of his own free will. He obviously isn’t going to fully trust them, and I bet he’ll also be doing whatever he can to make sure Avalanche doesn’t cause any casualties, and has no problem navigating both sides to reach what he sees as the best possible outcome.

5. This leads to my current opinion on the Keystone Betrayal. I don’t think Reeve was intending to actively betray them. If you reread the script of the return to the gold saucer, it almost sounds like Cait Sith was trying to ask Cloud why they needed to go after the Black Materia at all. My theory is that Reeve was getting worried about Cloud’s increasingly odd behavior, and Cloud’s inability to explain himself was what sealed the deal. I think Reeve wasn’t trying to throw in with Shinra, but figured it was better to let Shinra take the Black Materia and store it safely in Midgar while unreliable Cloud and friends run after Sephiroth. And Reeve couldn’t exactly suggest something like that without looking suspicious, and in any case he’s extremely used to making his own decisions and going behind his peers’ backs to achieve them.

6. I can’t really justify the kidnapping of Marlene, though. I think it’s either Reeve veering too hard into ruthlessness to get the job done because that’s what he’s had to get used to working for Shinra, or it’s something Tseng suggested and added to this plan as a guarantee. I suspect Remake will do something resembling the latter, if they include it at all.

7. If I was writing Remake, I would then proceed to have Cait Sith be fully kicked out of the party at this point, which makes more sense than just keeping him around even with kidnapping and blackmail, and would be cathartic to the players who find the betrayal enraging. Then, maybe around the time the player reaches the Temple of the Ancients, I’d have a little section showing Cait Sith going to the Temple with the Turks. I’d have the player control Cait Sith with the Turks as awesome guest characters, and this covers the Turk Temple flashbacks from the OG. A bit of Cait Sith stealthing around trying to avoid Sephiroth, maybe. Ideally with considerably better and more fun mechanics for him, too.

8. It’s also my headcanon that Reeve needed to be controlling Cait Sith directly to solve the Temple and get the Black Materia, and even though it couldn’t actually kill him with Cait Sith as a proxy, he remembers the whole experience and has nightmares about it sometimes. I feel framing it a little more this way helps make it feel like an actual sacrifice, the way the OG hams it up. Again, if I was writing the remake…

9. Last headcanon: in the return to Junon after Meteor was summoned, Cait Sith/Reeve spearheaded the shit out of that rescue operation. Who else was going to? Although we weren’t shown it, I refuse to believe Shinra would have imprisoned Barret and Tifa and planned to execute them and just let everyone else wander free to plan a rescue. I have in fact written an entire fanfic about this. (the Cait Sith to the Rescue fic). He’s furious that Rufus still won’t try working with Avalanche to stop Sephiroth, and even more furious about the upcoming execution without trial to pin the blame on them, and this leads to him finally giving up on the idea that he can navigate both sides, and he comes down hard on the side of Avalanche. He immediately starts making plans to free everyone, plans which involve discretely shipping in another Cait Sith in order to free himself, and has to communicate the plan to everyone and convince them he can be trusted. The fic treats Reeve and Cait Sith as the same person, but closely follows Reeve’s perspective as he uses Cait Sith to mount a rescue, and I am also very pleased with the way I have progressed to treating my headcanon on Reeve’s ability like it’s normal, and not constantly explaining it like I did in the FF7/FF8 fanfic. Reeve worries a little bit about saying too much, but mostly it’s just a totally normal part of his daily life, and hopefully readers could piece it together themselves.

...I don’t think I will be totally disappointed if Remake parts 2 and up come out loudly saying “he has a remote control and Cait Sith is also an individual person!” (...even though I think remake part one very lightly supports my headcanon with what little we got), but I will definitely be bummed if they don’t tweak the betrayal at least a little and emphasize his involvement in the Junon rescue. It would be naive of me to expect anything too close to my fanfic and concepts, but it sure would be cool if I am anywhere in the ballpark of what ends up being in Remake.

[sizzlingpatrolfox]

You have been a fan for a long time now and are also not feeling much towards their recent content. I am in the same boat about the second part. There weren't many 2021 highlights for me compared to how full of actual content 2020 felt,and the last song I liked was Blue&Grey(not counting the covers and the solos).

For you,what do you think was different before,and what made you love them through these years?

I have seen a couple of "smart" blogs in here who are newer fans,who also aren't enamored with Butter and PTD. But they also feel entitled to analyze BTS content by being dismissive of most of the qualities that make BTS who they are. I would have liked to talk to other people who feel similarly disappointed with the 2021 direction,but those fans are exclusively focusing on queer aspects of Jikook performances and call anything that isn't Jikook being hot a waste of time or not mature enough,and that's just...completely missing the point of BTS? And insulting,because it's like they expect gay people to only sing about being gay and be sexual,but that's another topic.

I honestly don't know where you stand,but even if you think the same I'm still curious and want to know about your perspective.

I really love the contrast of high and low voices in Blue and Grey, it's so extremely beautiful.

What do you mean they analyze BTS content while dismissing the things that make them BTS? How is that possible?

I think there are a few angles to this, and I don't know if what I feel will make sense to you, or anyone but here it goes.

First of all, bighit. Bighit has been actively trying to branch out from BTS so they'll be able to at least get by when BTS are no longer idols. Bighit/Hybe whatever their name is, they know perfectly well that they will never be able to recreate BTS success or even a tenth of it. But they will get by. The company won't thrive once BTS are gone, but they'll survive. There was a recent media article about quarter of the year revenues thing that they do on idols companies and in hybe statements, they said something like "50% of our revenue came from albums even without BTS releasing one". Just making sure everyone knows they can sell albums that aren't BTS, you know.. wink wink. There's also COVID and the fact that it's impossible for them to tour so music like they did before keeps getting postponed until they can perform those songs in a concert. It makes sense, kinda. It made sense in 2020, at least.

So while all of this is happening, bighit is doing the bare minimum to keep fans hanging and providing just enough content to keep everyone on their toes. You know, a couple of bangtanbombs a week, some webtoon... and that would be it lmao.

Then there's BTS themselves...

I used to love their enthusiasm and sincerity. There was sooooo sooooo so much enthusiasm in their music, their performances, the way they interacted with fans, they were enthusiastic about their comebacks. I haven't felt like anything of that was there since 2019. I could speculate on why where when who but that would be a whole other post and either way I would just be guessing away, so I will only talk about my feelings and the differences I notice. For like two years already, it has actually felt for me that this is something like a chore for them. That they do it as ticking off items from a list and not because their hearts are really in it.

I know that they struggled to have some private lives amidst their crazy schedules, but now they have that and there's just... disconnection between BTS and the fandom. I didn't know it was mutually exclusive. I said it before when talking about ITS 1 and ITS 2 but they don't even have conversations on camera anymore. They go on live and don't know what to talk about, they don't know how much they can say, they are scared of speaking. They seriously don't want to share anything about themselves. I was watching Festa 2019 earlier this afternoon, and so much was said, so much to learn about all of them. It was wholesome knowing to that extent about what they thought and felt, it made them feel accesible and human to me. A lot of times in 2020 and 2021, and right now too, they just feel to me like people I once knew. Especially Jimin and Jungkook. And no, I don't feel like this just because of the break but I felt like that even watching Jimin's live, and when Jungkook showed up with a one year old dog that nobody knew anything about, and during the concerts, and throughout the past two years.

Going into the jikook aspect of things, I just honestly have a bitter taste about the fact that everything we know of them, it's during their work lives. Every interaction there is of them, is because there happens to be a camera around, except for the stuff Jimin talks about sometimes, it's never because they want to share. The last time they were seen together out and about was 2019 while they were on tour. Jimin was the one who used to post about them regularly but now he barely even posts about himself, so. And Jungkook won't post or talk. It's not that I'm bitter because I feel entitled to knowing or anything, it's seriously just me being sad that that stuff has changed.

Of course there are some silver linings here and there, and there have been short and little outburts of honesty about what they think of their careers these days, but overall that's the feeling I've been having about BTS ever since the end of 2019 and it only got worse in 2020 and especially in 2021.

3J choreo for butter remix didn't feel like it was a chore for them, they were really invested in that and they enjoyed doing it. Even if they don't release albums, they could still do more stuff like that; everyone loves it and it allows them to show their talents.

I guess what changed is that they didn't feel like celebrities to me but now they do. I mean, they have been celebrities for a while, I just was used to a different type of BTS/ARMY dynamic and that's long gone and their celebrity image is what remains.

Another thing that made me love them back then, was that I thought they were really invested in social causes. But they aren't. Maybe this is more of a critique towards the company than towards them especifically, but they could do so much more for the lgbtq community and they don't. They could've openly supported the anti-discrimination bill that was pending for approval in the senate in Korea, a huge step for gay rights, but they stayed silent. They could've spoken in favor of the female olympic sport player that was receiving so much hate, but they didn't. They could've had a gay couple in PTD MV but they didn't. They could've even had one in My Universe MV but no, we had to see that green screen monstrosity. I know it most likely it's bighit's fault, but their "activism", if you can even call it that, is extremely fake deep and even if it's solely the company's doing, I don't really see BTS standing up to the company and asking for things to change.

[btsmosphere]

Crossing Paths - drabble from the Crossfire universe

request from @excusemyuwus -

I remember Tae said he had a crush on her while working on that project so now I kinda want to see his pov of that time and how he was holding being around his crush lol, not gonna lie gangster Tae all nervous bc he like someone is something want to see (also imagine how much the guys would tease him uwu)

tumblr ate your ask when I tried to answer it, sorry! this is the only part I had copied, but if it ever resurfaces, I shall answer there. for now it is still refusing to cooperate so I am posting like this! (update: the ask just returned, it is here)

~pairing: taehyung x reader ~word count: 1.4k ~pre-relationship, fluff, angst, slice of life, mafia au, college au ~rating: g ~warnings: vague mention of gang activity, this is a gang au after all, but it’s not particularly prominent

~a/n: thank you for your great request! this was so nice to come back to, I am so sentimental about this series as my first bts fic🥰takes me back to when I was just getting into bts… it felt hard to do it justice! because of this, sorry it took me a while to write, but I wanted to do it well, and again I kept the theme of making my ‘drabbles’ wayyy longer😅final big thanks to the site being frustrating and eating drafts and such🙃🙃but here it is, finally seeing the light of day! I hope you enjoy it x

“I can tell something’s on your mind, Tae.”

Jimin stared coolly at his friend. Looking over his shoulder guiltily as he unlocked the door, Tae found the other boy with his hands in his pockets, looking expectant.

All Tae could do was shrug as he elbowed the door open, heading to ditch his bag.

“Hey, Jimin’s right.”

A light flick on Tae’s forehead made him startle, looking up to find Hobi grinning, though his head was tilted to one side in question.

“What is it?”

Jimin’s shoulder nudged his own as they sunk into the sofa.

Tae checked his phone.

“It’s just a project for class, don’t worry about it,” he pocketed his phone, ignoring their gazes, “I gotta meet with my partner in an hour.”

“It’s okay, I wasn’t staying that long anyway,” Hobi slumped down too, having helped himself to a drink from the fridge, “I’m on watch with Yoongi across town.”

As the discussion turned to this week’s jobs and deals, Taehyung rested his head back against the sofa. The sounds of his friends’ conversation was like static. Instead, he was picturing the scene in class earlier, as the slideshow was flipped to show the project partners on the screen.

Tae hadn’t been too fussed, idly playing with his pen lid as he searched for his name. But when his eyes fell on it, he sat up straight.

Having only bumped into you a few times in class, he had never expected his heart to be hammering quite so hard as he quickly scanned the room for you. Sliding his things away, he had walked towards you as everyone began to file out, meeting you halfway as you did the same.

Leaning against a desk to keep his jittery hands occupied, he grinned at you.

Your returning smile, he noticed, was much more nervous, only flickering into existence for a wavering second. The two of you had only a brief conversation to sort out when you would meet, before you had practically scurried away.

His eyes had lingered on you as his smile slowly sank.

Unconsciously poking his tongue against his cheek, Tae wondered if you were afraid of him.

“Hey!”

A finger clicked sharply in front of his face. He blinked back at Hobi’s grin, Jimin bursting into laughter at his side.

“Just a project, my ass,” Hobi shook his head, dumping an empty bottle on the coffee table, “don’t wanna be late, do you?”

A radiant smile was tossed over his shoulder as Hobi left the room, front door clicking soon after.

Sending his best friend a knowing look, Jimin also gathered himself to stand.

“Have fun tonight, yeah?”

He winked. Tae protested, shooting up from the sofa with an affronted look.

“So it is a special someone?” Jimin giggled.

“You’re impossible,” Tae grumbled, trailing after him to the door, “it’s just a project, I told you.”

Jimin hummed in a way which made it very clear he didn’t believe him.

“Don’t scare them off, tiger,” he remarked, stepping outside.

Tae’s shoulders slumped. He was certain that was just what he had already done.

“I’m busy tonight. And my house isn’t free, so I can’t have anyone showing up here.”

Namjoon chuckled across the line.

“All this for a college project?” Clearly he had heard about this from the others. “If you could lend Kook some of your commitment to school, that would be great,” he teased.

Sighing, Tae spun around to survey the road outside his window, ruffling his own hair.

“You’re very funny, but I need to go. See you tomorrow.”

Tae was certain he would never hear the end of this from the others. It was true that he had firmly set aside time for your meeting today, even if it was only for a minor college presentation. But it was important to him.

He knew that this was the only time he would get together with you, and though it would end as soon as the presentation was given, he couldn’t help but want to make the most of it. At your last meeting, he had been largely distracted by the dizzying height of your apartment, leaving him shying back from any windows.

So this left you with his house today instead.

Arriving soon after Tae’s phone call, you were both soon seated on his floor. Though you mostly worked in quiet with occasional, quick conversation, it was not awkward. Your legs lay close together under the coffee table as you scribbled away diligently on its surface.

Glancing over the lid of his laptop as his fingers hung idly, Tae sighed. Watching as your pen swirled across your notebook, he let his eyes drift across your focussed features.

He swallowed as he did so, teeth tugging his lip. A light frown came over your features. He couldn’t take his eyes away from your lips as your pen lifted to your mouth, resting between your teeth as you mulled the work over, eyes flitting about the page.

Eventually, the lack of tapping at his keyboard must have got through to you. You raised your head.

Too late to divert his gaze, Taehyung cleared his throat and muttered a proposal for a break. Eager as well to put your work aside, you clambered from the floor to join him at his offer of a drink.

Moving through to the kitchen, he made casual conversation, asking after your dad. Last time there had only been a brief meeting, as he met Tae at the door before you hurried him away.

Picking up on his offer to chat, you teased Tae for his fear of heights, giggling over how he had screwed his eyes shut whenever he had come within sight of the view from your windows.

Of course, Tae tried his best to roll his eyes at you, but the smile dragging the corners of his mouth refused to be suppressed.

He poured your drinks. When he turned away to put the cartons back in the fridge, he took a breath, trying to settle himself. Why did he feel so flustered?

Squaring his shoulders a little more, he turned back, only for his hand to catch one of the glasses. It clattered against the surface, barely leaving time for him to jump back and avoid being splattered with its contents.

You hopped from your seat, ready to help.

Swallowing down his shock, Tae scratched at the back of his neck to hide his slightly trembling hand.

“Don’t worry,” he quickly muttered, flashing a nervous smile as he gathered towels and set to cleaning up.

Soft laughter followed from you. Still, you reached across to help.

Righting the glass and taking one of the cloths to clear up, your hand came concerningly close to Tae’s own. He kept his eyes firmly fixed on the countertop, his cheeks warm even as you finished and he was rooting in the fridge again for a refill.

You seemed miraculously unfazed by his flailing, though, he noticed as you finally settled beside each other sipping your drinks.

“So it went well?”

Jimin nudged a reluctant Tae, eyebrows wiggling all the time.

“Yes, fine,” Tae groaned, trying to shrug him off.

Jimin did stop, but only in favour of staring at his friend with doleful eyes.

“Don’t be like that. You’ll see her again. You literally share a class!”

“It’s nothing like that,” Tae refuted.

He even halfway believed it.

You had got on well together, but surely not more than could be expected of most classmates? He sighed a little as he thought of it. It had been fun, but there was no excuse to spend any more time with you.

Besides, sparing one night to work on a project was a little different to becoming friends, or even more…

There was a reason the bangtan boys stuck to themselves.

But as he reminisced, he knew he had a soft spot for you, even if it should come to nothing. The project was over, the presentation given, but he still remembered the way you bounced with excited relief after you had finished talking to the class. Your face was glowing as you high-fived him with a grin, the work having paid off.

There was still a hint of nervousness though, and you had only given a timid smile and a small ‘see you later’ before heading out of class.

And that was the end of it.

But Tae smiled to himself. It had been fun, and he knew he wouldn’t be sorry if you ever crossed paths again.

Thank you for reading! Reblogs and comments super appreciated always!!

Taglist: @aianloveseven​ @preciouschimine​ @un2-verse​ @ddaechwita​ @taegularities​ 

[caizen]

here's to karma (at least we tried, didn't we?) | okkotsu y.

synopsis: you and yuuta go back to where it all started, rewriting the beginning as the end.

wc: 2.0k | prfr

warning/s: one swear i was hesitant to put in and might remove later, brief talk bt abandonment + insecurities since i am one insecure piece of shit and that was the root of this all | genre: angst

playlist : flower face - angela (this song SLAPS please do listen to it)

a/n: this is my break up fic with yuuta i'm leaving him thanks for activating my insecurities/lh /hj now i have this fic of leaving u that i might revise some time later. anyway i'm proud of this ahaha

♡ reblogs are appreciated ♡

okkotsu yuuta is not an early bird.

he doesn't like getting up before the sun, but he learned to love it when he once watched it rise with you. he doesn't like cold showers in the morning, but he's willing to take them to be presentable for you. he doesn't like alarms, but he's willing to make as many as he can to wake up with you.

yuuta is not an early bird, but at 5 in the morning, fully-dressed and awake, he's in front of an old convenience store, six feet away from where you sat down.

reluctant to call out your name, his gaze and shoulders heavy with unnecessary guilt.

he eventually greets you.

"good morning," he tells you at 5:16 a.m.

his voice is raspy, possibly from how it's only been 53 minutes since he woke up.

you don't mind it anyways; you've gotten used to hearing its soft whispers of "good morning" whenever he comes by your place to pick you up, or the lighthearted bursts of laughter when he finds himself in a stupid situation, or how he leans into your ear to tell you how wonderful you look when it's too crowded and you're struck with unpleasant thoughts.

it takes you minutes to reply, hesitant and distracted with thoughts wondering why he was here even if it had been you that called him over last night.

he figures you haven't noticed him yet, so he takes three steps towards you.

one for each year you both spent calling and finding home in each other.

the first year, when you first ask him to go stargazing with you even though there were barely even stars at night with how bright the city is.

the second year, when he's not-so-shy to let you know about how he carries an extra scarf from fall until spring because he's memorized your forgetfulness.

the third year, when things start to fall apart, but you're both still able to mend it back together. (or pretend that it's fixed.)

and the fourth—

"you really came, huh," your voice is low and almost inaudible except for the pained chuckle at the end of your sentence.

full of regret, your head hangs low. maybe it wasn't a good idea to have invited him.

he was stupid to have actually come anyway.

and honestly, he didn't want to come had it been someone else that invited him out at morning.

but it's you who invited him, and he's never been able to say no to you. not when he doesn't like seeing you disappointed.

"of course," he lowers his gaze to the ground, unable to look at you without feeling his head and chest ache every second. "you know i'd never flake out on you."

—then why was there never a fourth year?

something stings your eyes and blur your vision for a moment.

they're gone when you blink, leaving behind a wet trail down your cheek that was quick to dry when the breeze passes you by.

a sore, forced laugh leaves your lips, followed by a cough that has him rushing to your side and patting your back gently while worried eyes watch over you for every second that passed by.

"are you okay?" despite his hoarse and harsh-sounding voice, his tone is sweet and mellow, dipped in genuine concern, rough hands handling you delicately.

everything's silent other than your cough resonating in the empty parking lot and his soft pats on your back ringing in your ears. it remains empty aside from the two of you.

too bad it wasn't open for 24 hours so that there would be a few vehicles around or aisles for you to hide behind and then you wouldn't have to face him.

that's what you've always done though.

run away from reality and its problems.

it's time for you to face it again.

"sorry," you cough into your elbow. "yeah, i'm fine."

yuta knows about how often you lie about your condition, so he asks one more time in hopes of getting an honest answer.

a nod is all he gets. he doesn't question you again.

he wants to though.

he wants to ask if you're okay and if you two can try again.

still, he doesn't because he knows that he's going to get both a 'yes' and a 'no', and he knows which answer belonged to which question.

backing away from you, he sits when he deems the distance between you two not too far nor too close. you're more than a hand's reach, and that's enough for him. he wants to be closer, but to have you around is already enough for him.

it's already 5:28.

time passes too quickly.

despite wanting to cherish the moment, sit in silence and hopefully, peace as well, he stops his stalling and questions your need to see him in the morning when there's so much more time left on the clock.

as he's fulfilled your desire to meet him, you fulfill his of basking in the stillness of the world—with you.

you, and not someone else.

you, because you're the one he wants to have around.

you, because he—

—loves you.

he loves you, and not someone else, because he can't see himself with anyone else other than you.

(and he'll keep on loving you, even if you tell him to stop for his sake and yours.)

"do you still remember?" you mumble in your folded arms on your knees. "when we first met."

of course he does. it was somewhat unusual and unforgettable aside from the fact that the place you're both at right now is where you two met.

a cold, lonely dawn spent at an empty parking lot of a convenience store. two kids feeling empty and drained until he decided to strike up a conversation with you, wondering why you were there when you could ask him the same. neither of you judged each other about it though, understanding one another regardless being in different situations.

that's when you both got on the same vehicle and drove to a road that led to now.

it was like any other roadtrip, fun yet tiring, but neither of you realized that when everything was romanticized since the moment you two got on. it really was stupid of you two to think that meeting at a convenience store was romantic because it's not.

it really was stupid of you to ignore the warning signs.

"yeah," scratching his nape, he tilts his head to get a glimpse of your face, but he only sees your back. "we danced around even though there wasn't any music playing."

"it was dumb," you turn away from him as if you were going to get the urge remake the mistakes you made then if you saw his undeniably pretty features.

"it was fun though," a shy, embarrassed smile tugs at his lips. he hopes you're smiling too.

"wanna do it again?"

this was dumber.

though you're not going to make the same mistakes again. this was the end already, after all. there's no more mistakes to be made when there's no choices to be made.

the deep inhale of the cold air stings your lungs as you finally face him for the first time today, standing up and holding a hand out to him.

he swallows the last bit of hesitance that was preventing him from taking your hand, then starts to pull you into him.

"still no music?" one of his hands run to your waist.

you answer him as he's about to intertwine his other with yours by taking out your phone and a slow, gloomy melody begins to play. it echoes in the empty space lightly when you settle it on the cold cement floor.

no comments were made about the choice of music. his hand rests on your waist while yours on his shoulder, the others laced together.

for a moment, you're both back to the start.

dwelling in the glum atmosphere, savoring each other's company.

still unable to look each other in the eye so you two opt for the ground or anywhere other than the eyes or face. stiffly and awkwardly swaying, feet pausing every few seconds in doubt, choosing which steps to take because it's not used to dancing.

bathing in the lowlight of mornings that turn into something better because that's what you two are good at: romanticizing the hopeless and the unromantic.

"i wanted to have a last dance with you," you mutter, afraid he hears it. "that's why."

with the little space between your bodies, he does hear it. like your first meeting, he doesn't judge you for it. he likes dancing with you anyways.

"it doesn't have to be the last one," he wishes to say but it remains as a thought, the lack of courage not allowing him to use his voice. knowing he's going to regret doing so later, he still keeps them to himself.

so instead, he says something else.

"we can always dance again, if you'd like."

fuck.

that's even worse. (is it?)

on his shoulder, he feels your fingers claw at him. he wasn't supposed to say that. at least he doesn't mind it, but maybe you do.

you said it yourself, this was the last. maybe you said that because you didn't want to anymore, he overthinks.

with closed eyes, your fingers loosen up on the cotton material, relaxing and exhaling slowly through your nose.

"that's—" he tenses up at your voice.

"that's cool."

did he hear you right?

"i don't mind dancing with you again but," the corner of your lips curl up, a burning sensation in your lungs when you inhale the cold morning air and finish your sentence. "someone might."

someone, meaning the person you see himself with in your stead. the person whom you're convinced is better than you. the person whom you're convinced is more fitting for him, unlike you.

your eyes meet, and he can see through you.

you always lied about how you felt, until now.

it's all obvious with the way your voice stutters, eyes falter, and hands tremble; with how you avoid his gaze as much as you can because it's become unbearable to look at him without having your heart be spared from being torn into little pieces.

yuuta's done beating around the bushes. biting his lip, his hands squeeze your waist and hand, his gaze shaky.

"you didn't have to end this."

having enough of it, too much for him to contain, he bursts into tears and lays his head on your shoulder, shuddering and holding onto you tightly, as if that was ever going to stop you from letting go.

"it was better for the both of us."

the music gets drowned out by his choked sobs, the sky growing a little brighter than before each minute.

the sun rises slowly and lights up the dark corners of the world, and there's nothing you can do but watch another day begin again.

there's nothing you can do to stop yuuta crying.

there was nothing you could do to stop yourself from falling out of love.

(and even if you could prevent it, the road was always going to lead here.)

and as your shoulder gets soaked in tears, while you softly tug at the black tufts of his hair, you remember that there never was a fourth year because you—your insecurities—cut it off before he could. (because he never would, and neither would you.)

at your reply, he wonders why he even came here in the first place. was it because he was hopeful that you'd take him back again? (definitely.)

it's too early for this, and okkotsu yuuta is not an early bird.

he doesn't like getting up before the sun, but today, he did just for you. he doesn't like cold showers in the morning, but today, he took them to be presentable for you. he doesn't like alarms, but last night, he made as many as he could to make sure he doesn't wake up late and make you wait for nothing.

yuuta is not an early bird, so he faces the consequences of being left.

(while he's busy facing his consequences, you're facing yours: having to wake up knowing he's someone else's because of you.)

(you never wanted to leave, but it was better than to have him abandon you.)

(even if he never was going to.)

[btsandvmin]

How much do we really know?

I really don't understand how any BTS shippers can be confident enough in their ships to turn into “supporters/believers” that believe their ship is real 100%. For any ship. Like even deep diving into some theories or getting literally 100+ reasons from various believers own mouths for why some ships have to be real, nothing has been big enough to count as proof in my opinion. (Of course this includes Vmin.)

Like... They all have questionable moments. Some more than others, sure. But proof of more than very strong and unusually intimate friendships? No.

You could argue some things seem “gay” or has possible LGBTQ+ connections. Like GCF having a LGBT+ song, or 4 o'clock including a reference to a gay movie, or Vmin's literal gay drama whatever that was. But most of it is just fans zooming in on various things and adding their own meaning to it. Like it has to mean something becaues it is connected to your ship. (But only for your ship.) Sometimes, a lot of times, it’s not even directly connected to the ship... It’s just assumed to be connected to them. It’s a guess or a theory, not a fact.

I get questions from Vminies not knowing things about Vmin all the time, and I myself know I’ll never be able to remember or even see everything that is out there with Vmin. And that’s just from the content we are able to consume to begin with. Beyond that is a lot of guessing and assumption based on the fraction of moments we get. But if some Vminies might not even know where the soulmate label comes from, or that 4 o’clock was written with Jimin in mind or that Vmin seem to casually sleep together in private (if we take Tae’s words for it in the Billboard vlive) it’s clear that something I might see as obvious and common knowledge isn’t. Even further it’s clear that other shippers will know even less about Vmin. 

And how can you dismiss something you don’t even know about?

We all focus on, remember or look for/get exposed to our biases or favorite ships the most. Even if we consume the original content we will likely zoom in and see things for our own ship simply because we look for it. And there is nothing wrong with that, it’s natural. But we need to realize it means we will miss things when it comes to other ships, and need to be aware that we know more and end up in echo chambers of both facts and interpretations for our own ships.

It’s so blatantly obvious to me that many non-vminies have no clue about even some of the biggest moments between Vmin. And again, it’s nothing really odd or bad about that... Until you start to act superior even when you lack a lot of knowledge. So much misinformation is spread this way too...

That’s why even though I personally think I know more about other ships than perhaps the regular person, I still won’t preach or explain too much about other ships. Because just as I know others don’t seem to know or notice a lot about Vmin, I know I work the same in regards to other ships. I can’t possibly even remember everything when it comes to Vmin, so how can I with all other ships too?

If I get questions about tae/kook or ji/kook or any dynamic in BTS I might be able to answer it... But I might also lack the full context or might not even have noticed some things to begin with. Coming to me with questions about other ships will give you a very different view than if you ask a shipper focused on that ship directly. I try to be unbiased, but I can’t. I try to be informed but I can’t remember or notice everything. So even if I feel I know a lot, I might never know enough to get the full context of any situation regarding BTS. 

Of course trying to remember to watch unbiased content is very important and helps to keep a better balance. Or as in my case where I actively looked up other ship theories and felt “I know enough to see there are weird things and I can’t dismiss everything since we don’t know the truth of what it might mean”. Just as I feel a lot of things about Vmin shouldn’t be dismissed. Many other shippers also came to me and talked long and detailed about why their ship is real and my isn’t. Many times I lacked knowledge about specific situations about other ships, but so did they about Vmin. I don’t think you can dismiss something if you don’t even know about it to begin with, and there is a big gap of knowledge between the shipping communities.

I mean, the way hyung x maknae line ships have so many great moments and you barely see them outside of the actual content. At this point all ships in BTS are big and get attention, but they don’t seem to register the same way in people’s minds, with the focus  always being on the three youngest together.

This is the thing about worrying about “rival ships” too... They only matter if there is a moment between the ones you already see as “competition”. Does anyone worry or cry about Vmin or Ji/kook when Ji/hope or Hope/kook get very intimate and sweet moments? No, because they don’t seem to register at all. 

I wasn’t even able to find a gif of this ji/hope moment from Run recently... (And I can’t add twitter videos from desktop)

Yoon/min holding hands and joking about breaking up.

Meanwhile if Tae/kook have fun together or if Ji/kook does something cute all hell breaks lose. We have been tainted by the narratives from shippers. The more we see and hear about other ships the bigger “impact” they will have on us.

If moments like this between other members doesn’t make me feel insecure about Vmin, then why would any similar moment from Ji/kook or Tae/kook? People need to stop hyper focusing on both skinship and “rival ship” moments in general and stop adding importance to them, especially when they don’t even do it equally with all ships.

It’s not that one is good:

One is neutral:

And one is bad:

They all happen and exist and we need to realize that’s how it always has been and likely always will be. Any interpretations of these moments shouldn’t change how you view them when nothing is even confirmed. They all happen so we should all accept that and be happy the members have close and intimate relationships with each other.

I really don’t think people understand my stance on all of this. I literally don’t mind if another ship turns out to be real (even if any ship being real is probably not that likely), because I trust in Vmin’s relationship after having watched it for 5 years. But since nothing is confirmed I still remain of the opinion that Vmin’s relationship and behavior is weirder than other ships IN MY VIEW, based on MY INTERPRETATIONS. But I am totally ok with being proven wrong, because it doesn’t matter what kind of relationship Vmin have as long as I can trust that the love they express for each other is real. Thus I also don’t have to downplay moments between other ships. They are there and that’s nice.

We lack a lot of information for many reasons even though we do get to see a lot. But even knowing all the things we know, I still don’t think it’s enough for any ship moments to count as “proof”. For example with Vmin, they were denied to sing a song because it was essentially “ too gay” and Taehyung complained about it, but that doesn't mean they have to be a couple and is forced apart by Big Hit.

We put weight into things because we have our biases and guesses and we find things because we look for them. Here are just some things that fans of various communities says have to mean something but to me really doesn't have to mean anything even if proven:

Physical intimacy Emotional intimacy Jealousy Screen time Fanservice “Sexual tension” Heart eyes or any looks in general Joking about being a couple Showering together Sleeping together Being alone together Living together Writing songs about each other Secret signs Hidden messages to fans Hiding in rooms

And so on...

But even If you do want to count these things to mean something, at least acknowledge how many of those things other ships have too. Vmin literally have several of these confirmed as well. Many of these moments either have happened or gets speculated to happen between many ships. You might find your ship isn’t as uniqe as you feel it is if you actually start diving deeper. If you did and it makes you doubt your own ships superiority, that’s good. Being sure won’t lead to any good for anyone.

Also if you wanna go there.... If other shipper say these have to mean something they are either ignoring Vmin or more likely doesn’t know or say it doesn’t mean the same if they do it.

Fine if hand holding and cuddling doesn’t make you wonder about Vmin, that’s totally legit. In fact you don’t have to wonder about Vmin unless you want to. But using excuses for why something doesn’t mean something you don’t want it to mean or downplaying moments or automatically calling them platonic and “not the same” doesn’t mean you can’t be wrong about those assumptions. Especially when you might not know the full context of it. Again, it should go both ways and include moments from all relationships.

I am legit curious how ji/kookers and tae/kookers are able to be so confident about their ship being real with Tae doing the things he does towards Jimin.... Like... They mean to tell me Tae and Jimin being soulmates, Tae wanting to sing a romantic Christmas song with Jimin, Tae writing 4 o'clock, Tae having Sweet night and telling us it's a personal song while he keeps calling Jimin his only best friend doesn't even have a possibility to mean something non platonic? 😗

Soulmates + Friends lyrics + "how could I know one day I would wake up feeling more" + "are you my best friend?" + "sweet night is a personal song" + "Of course Jimin is my only friend" + 4 o'clock/dumpling fight + the not allowed Christmas song + "Jimin-ah I like you the most" + "I told him to come sleep next to me as I was too lazy to go to him" + “we told our candid stories as honestly as possible” + “Oppa, why are you still awake? I’m dreaming of Jiminie” = Vmin is probably the best known guess to what relationship Tae might be talking about in Sweet Night.

Is it confirmed though? Can I call it proof? NO! Because while it fits in theory, we don’t know and we don’t have all the information to know. But I can make a damn good case for it and that’s the whole point. I can do that because I look for material, see things and add them together with a narrative. Just as other shippers do with their ships. In the end it’s all just narratives though, not proof.

Getting all these asks recently just confirms that the people who worry, or who says other ships are real, haven’t read even a fraction of my posts or they just don’t understand them. Or let alone noticed major moments between all BTS members that should show that their belief is not as “obvious” as they might think.

I am tired of insecurities when it shouldn’t even matter. If any ship in BTS is real, let’s support them and be happy. It doesn’t change the dynamics and relationships between the other members if some of them happen to be a couple. What we see is still there. The “worst” that can happen is that our ideas and theories prove to be wrong. 

But let’s at least try to be aware of how little we see and know, and especially about ships that aren’t our own. I am writing about Vmin because there is a lot to see, but me focusing on Vmin also gives me a knowledge about them I can’t compare with other ships. Which is why I won’t sit and write essays about other ships, and which is why Vminies coming to me for information about other ships is going to lack the depth I can provide for Vmin. All shippers are biased and all shippers lack information.

If you want to ship do it, if you want to speculate go right ahead. But be aware that there is a big difference between facts and knowledge and narratives and speculation.

I hope you found this an interesting read. And if you are considering sending me asks worried about Vmin because of interactions between other members or you want to send “statments” or explenations about other ships being real, just know you are barking up the wrong tree.