#i know every time she talked super nice to me she was acting her ass off talking to me like im a child and not listening to me

[nytfythfhtyf]

this is going to haunt me for so long i cant stand when people dont like me. my boss’ response to me leaving hurt my feelings so much like who cares that doesnt matter but wow she was not a nice person

[moralesmilesanhour]

Hello!!! How are you? I’ve been a follower for the past few days and was wondering if I could request something.

I was hoping to request a fic or like give you a prompt for something for miles42 × femreader

So it goes like this- yk those super corny reads that are like the reader's pinning for miles and like sometimes miles finds them annoying but in a cute way but he don't know that her yk? So he's talking to his homeboys about her, talm about some how she's so "annoying, a nuisance" and guess who's behind the wall listening? The reader herself.

So this goes one of two ways- she either matches up there, confronts him. And she's like "flipping fine, if that's how you feel then lemme get out of ur way- you won't hear a peep from me" and she like just ignores him and he learns how he feels about her, sees how his life is so boring without her and all that- goes to apologize happy ending..

Option number 2: silent treatment. Like just slowly drifting away until he once again comes to the realization that he needs her and all that happy ending yay!

Feel free to do whatever you want with this but I'm thinking of sending the same request to other authors to see what they come up with cause everyone has a style k? And i just love studying them and reading them cause evervtime- no matter how similar the prompt is- they always manage to invoke different feelings with in me.

Anyway- have fun doing this- but remember you don't have to cause this is kinda too much and I'm sorry😓

"I want my pen back."

wc: >1,200 A/N: okay so i got a bit carried away...this is a long one. (yes I am using this as an excuse to try out the gradient thing) thank you anon for this fun request! i also rlly like ur reasoning behind it and i hope i was able to do this prompt some type of justice lol

The gel pen clattered to the ground.

“I got it,” you said, grinning at Miles. You squat to grab it before the boy can act to get it himself, and he sighs as you hand it to him.

“Thanks.”

Miles turned the pen every which way between his fingers.

You had gifted it to him on the first day of school, with that same expectant grin. The little cartoon dogs that surrounded the perimeter had begun to fade with use because – admittedly – it had actually turned out to be a good ass pen.

He’d thought initially that you were just being nice; maybe you were handing shit out to everyone because it was the first day, understandable. 

But then, it was highlighters (the erasable ones).

Pink sticky-notes on his locker, telling him to have a nice day with the ‘i’s dotted with hearts.

A new sketchbook for Secret Santa.

Miles’ pencil case had rapidly gotten bulkier, and when you rushed to grab a seat next to him during the one class without assigned seats, it finally clicked.

You were trying to get his attention. And he wasn’t sure what would happen if you got it.

“I like the new braids.”

He was snapped out of his thoughts, and turned to you.

“Huh?”

“The braids,” you laughed. “I like the pattern. Who did ‘em for you?”

A tiny smirk ghosted the boy’s lips.

“My mom. Just like the last time you asked me.”

He ran a hand instinctively over the meandering zig-zag pattern that his cornrows had been sectioned into. Miles looked at you from his periphery; you were still staring. 

“Bitch, just ask him out already!”

Your friend smacked the back of your shoulder as the two of you took your sweet time getting back to your lockers.

“Alright, today, I swear,” you said, hand over your heart for emphasis.

A beat of silence passes. “But what if he says no?” 

She groaned.

“Then he says no, and you can save your money. But say something, it’s getting embarrassing.”

Your friends’ encouragement landed you here, around the corner of a building where Miles and a gaggle of other boys from your homeroom were bursting into raucous laughter.

“Yo, why you ain’t bag her yet? She wants you bad,” one boy said.

Unsure if the ‘she’ in question was you, you stay where you are and keep listening.

“I dunno, she kinda annoying,”

Miles��� low voice makes your ears perk up.

“One day she gon’ run outta things to say about my hair, she has to!”

…Oh.

The buoyant feeling in your chest sinks as the group erupts into another laughing fit. If you asked him out now, you’d hear about it for the rest of the year.

Shoving your phone into your pocket, you turn back the way you came. 

Miles knew something was off when you sat down the next morning without a word. 

“You good?” he asked.

You glanced at him, then nodded before going back to playing with the beads in your hair. The excruciating silence stretched on for almost the entirety of class before it was broken again.

“Do you…wanna help me with my homework? I’ll really let you, this time.”

You raised an eyebrow.

“Morales, you got an ‘A’ in every class.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Your name’s on every bulletin board.”

“Damn,” the boy muttered to himself as his leg bounced under the desk.

Your beads clattered against your back as you rose from your seat. The bell had rung, finally. You didn’t even say ‘bye’.

Miles cracked open his locker. One of your sticky notes from last week had begun to un-stick and fluttered to the ground. There were no new ones. He bent to pick it up, noticing how neat and round your handwriting was on these compared to the way you wrote in class. The letters didn’t run together, like you were in a rush.

Neatly folding the note and sticking it in his pocket, Miles shut his locker to reveal your face. The boy nearly yelped in surprise.

“Where the hell did you come from? Scared the shit outta me,” he said with a grin.

“I want my pen back.”

Miles froze. 

“Which pen?”

You tilted your chin up towards the one he was currently gripping in his left hand. He looked down at it like a wad of cash.

“Oh.”

He couldn’t just not give the pen back to you…

…but he didn’t want to give it to you, either.

“What you need it for? Don’t you have, like, a whole store full of these?”

“Miles, I gotta get to class. I’m not playing,” you reached for Miles’ hand, but he raised it high above his head.

Instead of a smirk or mocking sneer, something like worry was etched onto the boy’s features. 

“Tell me what’s up witchu first.”

“What are you talking about? I’m about to be late, c’mon.”

“You ain’t said a word to me all day,” he dropped his hand momentarily. “Are you sick? Did I do something? What–hey!”

You had snatched the pen out of the boy’s hand when he wasn’t looking, throwing it into your bag.

“I thought that’s what you wanted.”

You turn to retreat down the hallway, but stop with a huff when Miles calls after you.

“Wait!”

“I’m waiting.”

“Come see me after school?”

You kicked an empty can down the sidewalk in front of Miles’ apartment.

“Make this quick, I gotta go study.”

He looks everywhere else to avoid meeting your eyes, looking for the right words.

“You didn’t answer me earlier,” Miles awkwardly shuffled his feet. “Are you mad at me?”

“...Yeah, kinda.”

“For what?”

You stop to think for a moment, crossing your arms. 

“For…for letting me hand you that pen, knowing you weren’t gonna give it back,” you began.

Miles’ brows furrowed in confusion. “That’s it?”

You shook your head profusely, “N-no, I’m not done. You let me buy you all that stuff, put all that dumb shit in your locker, whole time you don’t even like me–”

“You don’t know that,” Miles interrupted. Your head snapped up to look at him, and you paused.

“I don’t?”

Neither of you say anything for a moment, then Miles remembers the note in his pocket. He takes it out and shows it to you.

“These? Are cute as fuck,”

He searches for more words, ten continues, "A-and I use that sketchbook every day. That pen? It’s like, my favorite,” he laughs. “I got half a mind to steal it back from you.”

Miles watches you expectantly. Your arms are still crossed, but the corners of your lips quirk up in amusement.

“So you like getting free stuff.”

“No-! I…”

The boy’s arms had begun to flail around in frustration. You hold back a giggle, never having seen him squirm like this before. It’s a nice change of pace.

“Alright, listen. I like hearing you talk to me every morning, and…”

He trailed off. He had begun slightly bouncing on his toes.

“...I like you.”

At some point while watching Miles struggle to explain himself, the float-y feeling in your chest had come back. You tilted your head to the side, and smiled.

“Okay. What are you gonna do about it?”

The boy’s eyes lit up.

“Where do you wanna go?”

[mxlktxa]

ᴅᴇᴄᴇɪᴠɪɴɢ ʟᴏᴏᴋꜱ

ᴍᴏᴅᴇʀɴ!ᴀᴜ (ᴍᴇɴᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ᴏꜰ)ᴄᴏʟʟᴇɢᴇ!ᴀᴜ

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ(ꜱ); ᴍᴏᴅᴇʀɴ!ᴇʟʟɪᴇ ᴡɪʟʟɪᴀᴍꜱ x ꜰᴇᴍ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀꜱ; ᴇʟʟɪᴇ ᴡɪʟʟɪᴀᴍꜱ*, ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ, ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀꜱ ᴘᴀʀᴇɴᴛꜱ, ᴅɪɴᴀ ɴᴏʟᴀꜱᴛɴᴀᴍᴇ (ᴍᴇɴᴛɪᴏɴᴇᴅ), ʀɪʟᴇʏ ᴀʙᴇʟ (ᴍᴇɴᴛɪᴏɴᴇᴅ), ᴊᴏᴇʟ ᴍɪʟʟᴇʀ (ᴍᴇɴᴛɪᴏɴᴇᴅ)

ᴄᴡ; 18+ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ, ʟᴀɴɢᴜᴀɢᴇ, ᴇʟʟɪᴇꜱ ᴘᴏᴠ, ᴍᴇɴᴛɪᴏɴꜱ/ᴛᴀʟᴋꜱ ᴏꜰ ꜱʜ (ꜱᴇʟꜰ ʜᴀʀᴍ), ᴍᴇɴᴛɪᴏɴꜱ/ᴛᴀʟᴋꜱ ᴏꜰ ᴅʀᴜɢꜱ(/ᴅʀᴜɢ ᴜꜱᴀɢᴇ), ᴍᴇɴᴛɪᴏɴꜱ/ᴛᴀʟᴋꜱ ᴏꜰ ᴀʟᴄᴏʜᴀʟ (ᴜꜱᴀɢᴇ), ɴᴏᴛ ᴘʀᴏᴏꜰʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴀᴛ ᴀʟʟ, ᴘᴇᴛ ɴᴀᴍᴇꜱ (ᴘʀɪɴᴄᴇꜱꜱ, ᴅᴏʟʟ, ᴇᴛᴄ)

ᴡᴄ; 1.2ᴋ, 6.8ᴋ ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀꜱ

'✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ 🀦 '✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ '✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ 🀦 '✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ '✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ 🀦 '✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹

I had known this girl all my life. Since we were kids, really. She was just a sweet, innocent, happy girl. She could never do anything wrong. Even her appearance came off of such, definitely wouldn’t hurt a fly. Made friends easily— not with me, I was an ass—, super creative, and very talented. She was an angel, anyone would agree. You could love her oh-so easily.

Back when we were younger, she always came up to me whenever she saw me isolated from anyone else, wanting to hold conversations or just sit in a comfortable silence. As we got older, conversations were held much better and longer. She ended up giving me gifts out of the blue, begging me to accept them even when I told her to stop spoiling me. Drawings, little candy baskets, sweet notes, invitations for a sleepover or dinner at her parents.

I’m telling you. She’s the sweetest.

Later down the line, sometime between seventh and eighth grade, I would see her personality falter here and there, see her have her bad days, yet act like she was having such a fantastic one. Behind closed doors she would break down, screaming and crying her lungs out, verbally considering self-harm. I talked her out of it, thankfully, I didn’t want to see her so deep in an endless void.

Highschool rolled around, we were very, very different people. I ended up getting into substances I shouldn’t’ve gotten into, lots of fights, loads of rumors, and plenty of quick and unreasonable relationships. But her? She stayed the same. Perfect, gorgeous, happy, so very happy-go-lucky. Of course, she had her bad days, thats a given. But they were because of that stupid path I decided to walk down. And yet, that peachy little angel stayed by my side.

Fucking angel.

Around graduation, I was only smoking weed, selling some every now and again, taking time off of being in relationships. Fights were drastically reduced but rumors… Not so much. We went back to having sleepovers and little lunch dates. Mainly sleepovers as she said she enjoyed staying up with me and sleeping on top me more than sitting down and eating for what felt like ten minutes. She even encouraged me to go to college with her, move into a nice little home with her. As friends.

Moving in was wild. We would go out four times a week, constantly stay up late, and drink as if alcohol poisoning wasn’t a thing. That’s when I found out her appearance and personality was definitely not her default behavior. She was a total… let’s just say she’s not so innocent. She’s a wild dancer, crazy dirty talking, so flirtatious, highly sensual. That’s how she ended up basically admitting she’s always liked me and been dying to fuck me.

“Y’know, Els, I’ve always liked you. Love you, even. And I hated all those girls y’got with. Except that Riley girl. She was a sweetheart. M’but not Dina. ‘Specially Dina. Fuck her. Speakin’ o’ which, I would give anything to fuck you. To watch my sweet Ellie through half shut lids as she— …Mmph, nevermind. Sorry, m’sorry.”

“No, no. Tell me. Tell me what you want your ‘sweet Ellie’ to do. Hm? What do you want from me, princess?”

“Yeah? Y’wanna know?”

“Tell me, baby. No one’s around to judge.”

“I wanna watch you eat me out until I’m nothin’ but a crying, shaking mess. My legs, over your shoulders, our eyes filled with nothin’ but lust and pure love. Get me high beforehand, m’curious about what it might feel like.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Mhm… Better yet, buy a strap and let me sit on it. I’d let you do whatever you wanted to me. No complaints.”

“You’re so fuckin’ nasty.”

“Tell me about it.”

That entire interaction is what led me to actually laying her out and having her beyond fucked stupid. She asked and she received. Soon, we just labeled ourselves as a couple, she took me to meet her parents— as if I didn’t know them already— and I took her to meet mine. That includes Joel, even if he was just a really cool babysitter I had when I was younger. They love each other, platonically, of course.

“You? You’re the one that gave ‘er that bruise on ‘er arm?”

“Yep!”

“Y’seem so sweet, though. You’re also quite tiny. I reckon you could take ‘er in a fight, huh?”

“I wouldn’t go that far. Our play fighting does not do her justice, Joel.”

“Hey! You cheat! All the time!”

“I do not.”

“Joel!”

“I believe you, don’t worry, kiddo.”

We rarely ever fought. If we did it was either over something stupid— which resulted in talking it out—, or for valid, genuine reasons— those resulted in building up tension for a few hours, fucking, then talking it out. Terrible, I know but lord was she so filthy and rough.

I loved this girl and everything we’ve ever been through. She dealt with me for so long, she helped me through everything, she changed me. Of course, she would say I did the same for her but I would harshly disagree. I haven’t done nearly as much as she has for me. Except proposing and marrying the girl.

Oh, boy was she crying and passing out for the next few days.

Now present day, here we were, married and going through old photos we had and the notes she gave me back then. She was sat in front me in her nightgown, giggling at every photo she found from middle school. The picture was handed to me, both of us in our halloween costumes from that year.

“Remember this? Our little pirate and princess phase?” her eyes met mine, sending shivers up my spine and some wild butterflies in my stomach. I could only nod and stare at her in silence, too hung up on her giddy expression. “We were so cute. We still are, don’t get it twisted, but… This is a different kind of cute.”

“You’re so gorgeous,” I spoke without really thinking, watching the love of my life perk up at the small compliment. God she was the cutest.

"Thank you," she whispered, leaning forward to kiss my cheek, "I think you're very handsome."

"Handsome?"

"Mhm."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah," she giggled, scooting back from me, "so handsome that I could die."

We stared at each other in a comfortable silence, slowly starting to smile and puff up our cheeks with air. Within seconds we blew raspberries and began laughing like crazy. While she was in the middle of laughing, I grabbed the nearby polaroid that she had beside her, aiming it at her laughing expression and taking the chance to snap the photo.

"Got 'cha, pretty girl," lowering the camera, she gasped and snatched the photo from the device in my hand, sliding it off to the side. Those eyes I adored so much landed on me, holding an idea we both knew I couldn't confuse.

"Y'know, Els," she started, having me roll my eyes immediately and nod to her, "why don't we start a little private collection?”

As per usual, she came up with something I never expected to leave her mouth. My head tilted to the side, surprised at the suggestion meanwhile she just shrugged while reaching for the camera, “here. I’ll start.”

Just like that, her dropped the straps on her nightgown over her shoulders, her breasts on full display to me… And the camera. I watched as she made up various poses, snapping numerous pictures. She even stared directly at me a few times as the flash had gone off. I’m definitely fucking her after we put this stuff up.

“You’re something else, y’know that?”

“And yet,” she crawled over to me, straddling me, chest now against mine as she hugged me tightly, “you absolutely adore it. Don’t you?”

'✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ 🀦 '✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ '✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ 🀦 '✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ '✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ 🀦 '✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹

ᴀɴ; ʀᴇʙʟᴏɢꜱ, ᴀꜱᴋꜱ, ᴀɴᴅ ʀᴇᴘʟɪᴇꜱ ᴀʀᴇ ᴀʟʟ ᴡᴇʟᴄᴏᴍᴇᴅ!! ̤̮

[the-knucklesverse]

Deep Thoughts

something something Boom is feeling bad about himself because he's not smart in his world. Dark sees an opportunity - if this idiot is starting to recognize his failing, this may be something he can use to his advantage.

He slithers up to Boom and starts whispering in his ear, reinforcing the idea that his friends there aren't REALLY his friends, and that the other Knux's don't REALLY understand what he's going through

It's making Boom feel so much worse, because when Dark says it, it's giving his thoughts validity. Dark's just about to go in for what he hopes is the final push to get Boom to draw on the ME's energy, when he's hit with an ice cold stream of water.

~~~~~

"I'm gonna muzzle you and chain you to that corner if I see you slithering around the others like a demented slug again, Dark," Callie said as she came over to them. She gave Dark another squirt with her Super Soaker. "Get your ass back to your corner, you wrinkly crank."

Dark actually hissed at her, but returned to his corner of the Sanctuary. Callie hissed back, giving him another squirt as he retreated for good measure.

She turned to Boom, a little smile on her lips. "How's my Boomie? What was that overripe banana whispering in your ear, hmm?" She sat next to him, pressing her shoulder against his. "C'mon. Talk to me."

Boom shook his head, heaving a deep sigh. "Just telling me what I already know."

"Oh really? And what might that be?"

"That I'm an idiot. Back on my world, without the Master Emerald, I can't think straight. My brain . . ." He tapped his forehead with his fingers. "It's like it's all fuzzy. Like I'm dizzy all the time. I'm just . . . I'm stupid."

Callie considered this, leaning against him more. Physical touch was a good way to provide comfort to a Knuckles (at least to those comfortable with physical touch), so she made sure to keep contact with him as much as she could. "And this bothers you."

He turned to her, brow furrowed. "Of course it bothers me! Why wouldn't it? I'm a complete moron on my world! Wouldn't that bother you?"

"I guess it depends. Does it bother you while you're on your world?"

Boom blinked. He thought for a moment, before shaking his head. "No. But, idiot, remember? I'm too stupid to know how stupid I am."

"So it only bothers you when you're here. When you think back on how you act there. Right?"

"It's only when I'm here that I realize just how dumb I am there. It's embarrassing. My friends think I'm an idiot, and I prove them right every time I open my mouth."

"They must not like you, then." She shook her head. "If you're that dumb, they must hate hanging around you."

He jerked in her direction. "No! They . . . they like me. They invite me places and like hanging around me. I think."

"Then they must not trust you to help them when they need it. Like when they're fighting your Eggman. Probably run off and leave you behind because they know you'll just mess up and be more trouble than you're worth."

"No! We fight Eggman together all the time! I bash his bots something good, and we all work really well together."

"Hmmm," she said, furrowing her brow as she thought. "So then they're mean to you and like to see you mess up so they can laugh at you."

He gaped at her, brows pinched in upset. "Callie, my friends aren't mean! They don't laugh at me like that!"

She looked over at him, a thoughtful expression on her face. "Then why does it bother you if you're different there than you are here?"

"Because I can't think straight there! I can't focus or concentrate or put my thoughts in order like I can here!"

A little smile curled her lips. "Take it from someone who overthinks like it's her job. Sometimes it's nice to not have a bunch of thoughts rattling around in your head, being distracting and anxiety inducing and overall annoying when you're trying to do other things."

"That's not the point," he said, planting an elbow on his knee and perching his chin in his hand. "You don't understand."

"No, I understand. But I don't think you're looking at it the right way." She leaned against him a little more, placing a hand on his arm. "Boom, you have friends who care about you on your world. They don't seem to care that you're not the sharpest knife in the drawer. They love you for who you are. They accept you for who you are. That should matter for something."

He was quiet for a moment, before looking over at her. "Even if I'm dumb as a rock?"

She shrugged. "That's the Boom they know. That's the Boom they love. I know it bothers you, and I'm not saying it shouldn't. I'm just saying that as long as you're loved and cared for and accepted by your friends . . . maybe it’s okay that you’re different. They're there to take care of you, even if you're not at your best." She looked out over the Sanctuary, at the other Knuckleses. "And maybe you can take solace in the fact that when you're here, you are so smart and pulled together that you can take care of all of them."

The furrow in his brow smoothed, and he looked out at the other Knuckleses for a moment, before turning back to her. "You really think that?"

She smiled, pulling him toward her to press their foreheads together.

"I really think that. We all play different roles to different people in our lives. Back on your world, you need a little caring. But here, you take care of others. It's just the way things go."

He smiled, a little chuckle rumbling from his chest. "Yeah, I guess so." He reached up and cupped the back of her neck to pull her against him a little firmer. "Thanks, Mom."

"Anytime, sweetie."

~~ Qwerty

[bucketspammer4life]

punch out boxers and what i think they had as a childhood stuffie + some extra guests

As a break from that one Forbidden™ post, heres something fluffy, sorry if the translations suck im using a translator

Glass Joe - a cat plushie with dark blue button eyes, lovingly named "Jojo" after himself, think of a calico cat for its pattern and its built like a teddy bear except for its head & tail

Von Kaiser - a teddy bear, creatively named "Bär" (means bear in german, i know how creative this is) suprisingly squeaky clean with a few stitches and a eye missing

Disco Kid - a koala named "Mr. Dance" that he regularly gave concerts to along with dance performances and talked to a lot, a bit pink since he accidentally messed up while washing it but still loved nonetheless, mr dance is a real one

King Hippo - a hippo plushie made from rags with souless button eyes he made a crown for, he got the name inspo from his plushie since it was named "King hippo", he jokingly refers to himself as "King hippo the second" if anyone knows about the original hippo

Piston Hondo - a frog plushie that is also suprisingly clean with a copy of his headband on it with a red belt, smells like mint for some reason named "マスターフロッグ" (master frog)

Bear Hugger - a stuffed salmon plushie handmade by a friend, smells like death and has a bite taken from it because he bit it while dreaming & ate a chunk from it

Great Tiger - a tiger plushie with sunglasses named "awesome man" (i couldnt find a proper translator and google translate sucks so im writing it in english) that smells like his dads perfume with a few cuts & a eye holding on for dear life, he performed magic tricks for it and made it have drama with his clones

Don Flamenco - a flamingo plushie with a red scarf around its neck, patched up with colorful fabrics, named it after himself, its eyes also happen to be missing, he argued with it constantly and fought it for no reason

Aran Ryan - a giraffe plushie named "spots" that has seen some stuff, half of its face missing, constantly wet (think of that webkinz plushie post) probably moldy with thousands of stitches & patches that smells like spoiled milk

Soda Popinski - a husky plushie with blue beady eyes, somehow in one piece except for one eye gone & sewn up nicely, named "Охотник" (Hunter) that smells like your grandmas house, lovingly hugged and tucked in along with him

Bald Bull - a sheep plushie, somewhat yellowish fur & glittery eyes named "kuzucuk" (no exact translation for this, kuzu means sheep and -cuk and most verbs similiar to it is usually added to mean little, either in a rude way or a cute way) that is always really warm and smells like cinnamon, he has sobbed into that plushie right after decking it in the face many times

Super Macho Man - a dino plushie (specifically a t-rex) named "Chompers" that has a few bitemarks on it and reeks of glue, he made it act out godzilla

Mr Sandman - a squirrel plushie named "Ms. Walnut" that has a portion of its tail missing and has one button eye and another stitched up eye, he always talked to it for advice and apologized to it after he punched it from anger, he always imagined Ms. Walnut's voice as a posh british lady when he made it speak

Doc Louis - a crocodile plushie named "Pickle" that reeks of pickles somehow, tail sewn in a half-assed way, always rko'd for some reason

Little Mac - a polar bear plushie, gifted to him from doc when he was first adopted named "tiny mac" stitched up lovingly, he still has it and is not ashamed, not one bit (me too bestie, shout out to that one pikachu plushie i bought with my own money at a bazaar and still hug every night)

Carmen - clown plushie with a dress very similiar to hers named "Señorita Payasa" (Miss Clown), the reason she has a polka dress is because of her and was the main reason she loves clowns

Narcis Prince - a horse plushie named "horsey" that is loved very much, always accompanied him with his imaginary tea parties, sewn up in the stomach nicely (he secretly still has it and still loves it very much shh shut up)

Gabby Jay - a handmade doll of him by his grandma, called "Gabs" for short, always held it close to his heart and sprayed his perfume on it, no injuries (unlike gabby jay himself LMAOO) , no dirt, and no trauma, beloved

Pizza Pasta - a flour bag with eyes drawn on, stuffed with fluff (with no flour thankfully) named "L'uomo della farina" (flour man) with a lot of patches, bitten very often

[ech0-0nslaught]

i want to know ur agent lore they sound cool,,, (totally not desperate for agent 32 content)

show your face anon i don't bite.. also here you go

my 4's entire lore comes from the fact that i can't fathom her name being anything except Four

her parents named her that cause she's the fourth kid they had and they didn't give a shit about her 😢 in order to make them give a shit she studied all day every day like a madman to get extremely good grades cause they Had to show up for school events otherwise someone would know something was up...

anyways she skipped grades, didn't make any friends, didn't even know who the squid sisters were, then one day she heard ebb & flow on the radio (i like to think it's a song about marina running away from the domes and being Free, inkfish are weird about music they hear one song and just leave their home forever lol) and decided to go to inkopolis (the family lives 40 mins away from both inkopolis and calamari county, if this doesn't look right on the inkadia map then you can throw a stick at me or something)

that's where she finds marie's pothole and decides to investigate! she becomes agent 4 etc, the way she approaches agent work is basically the same way she acted towards schoolwork (i have to be the best so they can love me, if i get one thing wrong they'll hate me forever) and marie tells her to chill out... she spends a lot of time in octo canyon with marie, she ends up taking a lot after her... ok then they save callie and that's two good role models, she stops acting like this cold uncaring war weapon and starts acting like four !!!

since she spends a lot of time at cuttlefish cabin with the squid sisters and octavio's always there, or sometimes she's there by herself and has to watch him, they slowly start becoming friends... they do four's homework together and octavio teaches her octarian cause she wants to talk to the octarians during her patrols around the domes lol

i think she basically befriends all of octo canyon after learning octarian, like they still fight eachother but nobody's actually worried about anything and it's basically just a game. also callie still goes to the domes to talk to her friends i think they all do. fun

i like to think octo expansion happened a year after splatoon 2 and not at the same time, basically just so that 4 & 3 can have already met before oe lol . they're good friends 3 is a really bad influence on 4

okay moving on to agent 8 . she DOES have a name it's hachi (creative i know), back at the domes she used to be in the surimi combat unit (name i pulled out of my ass) and she's never been on an official mission yet but she's basically done all the training already... wow awesome

she's already gotten a few warnings for possession of illicit material (various squid world items that the octarians pick up on the ground and trade around) and general compassion towards the enemy but her unit's elite lets it slide cause she's a good soldier. at 12 she heard the calamari inkantation and it did affect her in some way but she didn't think about running away until she heard it again at 14... so then she does... metro time

i think it's implied that she experiences psychosis due to the many hallucinations. anyways the metro isn't fun but they get out YAY!!! she lives with pearl and marina for a while but it starts to bother her how far away she lives from inkopolis (really short ride but she likes walking), so she decides she needs to find an apartment in inkopolis

the whole splatoon has a nice meeting/dinner and 4 mentions needing a roommate, 8 (who barely speaks inklish at this point) immediately offers herself as a candidate

so that's when they start living together. 4 teaches her about the squid world ooo... they become friends awesome

4's working at grizzco in the super secret clique of guys who need to clean up after everyone's failed runs (top employees who get treated even worse and HAVE to work every day, the company needs them!!) and 8 doesn't like her job and hopes that grizzco blows up every day. after she gets her engineering degree (in a less stressful way than how she handled the rest of her school years) she even has to help them design weapons

8 started studying at inkblot art academy!! fashion specifically, she works part-time at a clothes store and she wants to hopefully one day have a clothing brand of her own... wow...

they both do patrols at the canyon now also at one point they get together i can't decide how. anyways the world tour

4 was supposed to come to the tour too but a big run started (and grizzco's shitty about giving vacation days) and also a bunch of octarians mysteriously went missing at octo canyon, so she ends up staying in inkopolis to take care of both issues... very sad

when she and octavio realize that basically nobody's there anymore he leaves on his giant robot suit to find whoever's responsible. he goes to the crater we know what happened (nooo the octarians are all fuzzy now)

around the time octavio leaves is when oth tests the memverse for the first time !!! when order takes over four also gets sucked in and order manages to grayscale her pretty easily cause like, a world of order means no big runs and no octarians going missing (oversimplification)

anyways it basically splits her consciousness into parallel canon, the ones wearing helmets basically only have enough brainpower to use weapons and follow orders but the one wearing the mask is just four but orderly or something (this isn't canon parallel canon is just a bunch of copies of four's soul)

ok anyways after 8 kills the white baby 45 times they reconfigure 4's palette and she's normal again yay, marina hires her as head of memverse security and she can quit working for grizzco hoorayyyy

thanks for reading and sorry for the word vomit

[misiahasahardname]

Thoughts on

Katie and Sadie

Mike

Trent

Dakota

and Sierra?

katie and sadie -

they have very little screentime so i don’t have much to say about them. i have definetly seen a lot of girls like them, but that was usually when i was primary school age, not as a teenager. at times they can be really annoying, but their friendship can be pretty wholesome at times. reminds me of how attached i was to my friends at… well, not their age. there’s nothing really bad about them, but not much good either? really indifferent about them.

mike -

fresh tv did NOT know how to write a character with a mental disorder… besides the bad representation, i think mike is a pretty nice guy! i love silly-with-a-hint-of-mental-disorder characters like him. he’s one of the better characters from gen 2, and he’s… sweet? that’s how i’m going to word it. also. i‘m going to say it right here. i LOVE svetlana (or swjetłana, as they call her in the Polish dub). my favourite alter (i think that’s the term?) of his. totally not just because she’s slavic and i crave representation, she’s just a very fun character and a very skilled gymnast! i also like vito. he’s cool. very unfortunate what they did with mike in ass stars!

trent -

trent is a very interesting character. i could go on for ages, analysing his behaviours, figuring out his past traumas and what caused him to end up the way he is. there is so much to talk about with trent! that’s why i love trentcourse: it’s just a bunch of people talking about this guy!! he’s a sweetheart. his chill, coolheaded, and a really kind person. he’s not made much real enemies, and. ugh. i love his relationship with gwen. just,,,,, so pure. action kinda fucked him up a little bit, but in a way it gave him a bit of depth? my personal theory on why he kinda just. snapped was that since action started so early after island, he hadn’t gotten the chance to pack enough meds, and anyone who’s needed to take any sort of medication for that kind of thing will probably know that if you’re going to go off of medication/start taking medication, you need to do it gradually, and that’s for a good reason!!!!!! anyways i love trent. he and cody are the traumatised boyfriends.

dakota -

I LOVE LOVE LOVE DAKOTA!!!!!! SHE’S SO FUCKING SILLY. genuinely. she is my favourite character of gen 2 alongside jo. she’s a bit how i used to imagine myself to be in the future! fashionable, famous, rich, successful, and in a healthy relationship!! (samkota is SO WHOLESOME) her turning into dakotazoid was actually really great. i kinda prefer her that way! she could still be confident with her body despite being a twelve foot tall mutant! i don’t fully understand people who draw her as ‘healed’ from that because like. i don’t think you can reverse something that drastic. and also she’s comfortable with it! she doesn’t seem too upset about it (iirc of course. been a while since i’ve rewatched roti). anyways dakota is amazing, i love her and her relationship with sam, and i think she and zoey should be best friends!!

sierra -

ok i don’t know if you’d want to hear it but. i’m sorry. i hate her. like every moment she was on screen i’d get SUPER uncomfortable. her actions towards cody were horrible and i am not going to ignore them even though yeah she’s a fictional character!!!! i don’t know if her actions were meant to come off as jokes or not but either way it’s not funny at all. i like her design, her voice acting is AMAZING, her face is very expressive (and i love that in a cartoon!), paris in the springtime was one of the best songs of the season (but it will never beat her real name isn’t blaineley), but she’s just. not a good character. she had potential! i would’ve loved it if she was a villain, like, you set up alejandro to be the main villain but them BOOM! sierra is actually a manipulative mastermind who will blackmail anyone and get them eliminated!! or something like that. but yeah i don’t like sierra.

i hope this is an ok response!

[sewer-freak]

LONG ASS MESSAGE WARNING!!!! I have Things to Share! You've not been super online lately so I've complied sum shit that may be of interest to you.

(turning off my pink text bc normal text is easier on the eyes for big messages likethis)

I've Accepted that my instinctive feelings toward your buddy Cain are. Different from yours and uhhhuhhhhh usually try not to make Too big a thing of it. (TBH, I get an instinctive bad vibe from. Most people. So that on its own isn't enough to go off of anyway.)

however!!!! I have reason to believe that he is The Kiwi Creep. (<- I gave him a name like they do for prolific killers)

Firstly, I present to you: These posts! I'm not a huge fan of this girl's either, but it is super useful that people just confess their dark incriminating secrets to her sometimes.

https://www.tumblr.com/heavensentofficial/757394760772337664/everything-is-alright-yes-its-just-not?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/heavensentofficial/757737395132186624/apologies-for-the-late-acknowledgment-thank-you?source=share

(The second one has confirmation that this the same person that's been harassing you!)

"Anyway, I’ve been intentionally misleading people. Or, one particular person.

She’s someone I truly hold dear and appreciate, yet I’ve been anonymously sending her sadistic, lewd fantasies I have about her. They make her scared and uncomfortable, but every time I send them, she comes to me for help. …Without knowing it’s me."

"I can’t keep up the act anymore, I feel as if everything’s blurring together. I’m hurting her. Yet I’m the person she seeks comfort from. She’s coming to the very person who’s causing her issues in the first place and she has no idea."

Sound familiar???

I find it interesting too that The Kiwi Creep instead of going to Cain like you suggested went to this totally uninvolved person! (Kind of like how you never see Batman and Bruce Wayne in the same room!)

Coincidence? I for one think not!

If this isn't enough, he recently announced he'd be going on break.

https://www.tumblr.com/divinetouchdown/757916668887515136/hello-all-i-have-an-important-announcement-to?source=share

To do what? To handle an issue offline with higher ups at the temple. Guess he decided the coal-walking wasn't enough...

I don't usually go there anymore bc the local temple is built on abuse, puritanical hypocrisy and stuffing people into nasty, hard to clean chastity devices, but because I wanted to get to the bottom of this, I dressed up as Edin, who he'd trust, to see if I could get footage of him doing the things The Kiwi Creep said he'd do. I have some videos I can send you in DMs if you want em.

To top it all off, I got an account of his character from someone else that knows him.

https://www.tumblr.com/poorsadorphanposting/757925978181943296/hi-hi-%CB%86%E1%97%9C%CB%86-i-hear-youve-talked-to-one-mr?source=share

I personally think it's pretty fucking damning but you ofc are free to reach your own conclusions.

Anywayz I hope you're alright n I know this ask is probably kind of overwhelming gihfuoji;kl ... Idk if putting it all out there like this is even helpful but I feel Strongly about The Truth being important. Feel free 2 take your time n figure out how you feel about this info n stuff idfk

hi. yea sorry idont have a good consept of timr. im mot on here alot. immrlyy truing to thnk words but its hard. id o not feel well.

i also get bad vibes feom everyone but idk idk cain i felt like. like he proved hilmself to me like he was different he said he was and he was but ffXKKNG KIWI SAID HE WAS DIFFERTN AND FHAT IF I KNEW WHO HE WAS I wouldd dhnage my tone oh nnyhod im going to be sick

wwwhhatt do yiu mean “shes comjing tothe bery peraon who is causing her jssues” hes so nice why WHYDO I MAKE EVERYUONE WANT TO HURT ME?! clearly he doesnt eant to feel like that he told me it frustrated him and hedidnt know what to so with the feelings i provoked him i always dducking do this i shojldnt interact with anyone evwer

ii i i dont kniw alot about the temple 8 only know whathes told me .,,, i thought he wpuld twll me to join but he neverdid it was alwaays more like “come to me with ur issues i can fix them!” idk idk idk

can

can you send me the vjdeos

i fffrll so horrible idont know what to do

[thelanor-s-astame]

EPISODE 2

This one is probably the episode I’m gonna have the least amount to say about. I still hadn't really solidified anything yet. It was still super off the cuff, and still uber amateur hour. But I think it’s a little bit better than the first one. I sorta lock down the flow a lot better in this one. The first bit in particular is really good. And it was a thing that I came up with in, like, the 11th hour that improved the whole thing. I remember needing to pad this bit out a little, I didn’t want to start with him meeting with Cornifer. I wanted him to establish himself a little first. And also it’s kinda funny when quite a bit of the video is me talking to two characters who I also play. Saine locked down the Cornifer voice in this episode. I think this is the first one I directed him in. He gives a real great performance here! Still real proud of the “Yeah money can’t buy happiness, but it can bribe off unhappiness so, yeah it’d help.” line. The dynamic zooms I did here are a little to tiny. This is something I still screw up from time to time. Gotta zoom in quite a bit if there’s only gonna be two cuts! But I always underestimate how much of something I need. Do that shit when I cook too. Just don’t add enough spices sometimes. But I started putting still images over the characters when they’re not talking! Me from two years ago is making little steps forward to give the series a visual style that works!

That’s the thing about these youtube videos that are nice. I can kinda just be really amatureish, screw up a ton, and have people come for the stuff I already know how to do, and just, figure it out as I go along! One of the things I started out thinking was “Is it gonna be a pain in the ass to manually apply a sound filter to every track every time I take damage on screen?” And nowadays that’s the *least* pain in the ass, manual thing I have to do! I can do that shit in less than a minute!

Also all the audio channel stuff whenever hornet shows up before the confrontation, is just me playing around with the sound design of the scene. I will just take any opertunity to do that. I did a deadcells video where I replaced every single sound, with a SSBM sound effect manually, for a joke that lasted 12 seconds. It took like 3-4 hours I just love making the noises go! It makes my brain go brrrr!

Grub Father was the first voice role I ever gave to Flashgen. An absolute shame I haven’t given him more. The dude will come up to be like “So I was thinking about what voice to give the character and I was thinking something like this? Is this good?” And it’ll be the perfect voice and exactly what I’m looking for. Dude never disappoints.

So Zote is very much a “So here’s the obvious bit, how do I make it a little better” kinda character. The obvious bit for zote is the one he is! He’s an obnoxious jackass who’se actually a poor lil meow meow that’s incapable of walking three steps without getting shit on. But will bullshit about being the best and better than you.” What if, instead of bring an asshole, he was passively condescending. What if he *acted* like he was hot shit. And what if he gave convincing performance? That’d almost make him more insufferable. And what if *even still* everyone could see right through him.

So the hornet fight was the first one of these I did. And it’s where I figured a looot of the groundwork for these. Basically I had to be way more dynamic with the camera, hide cuts so I could go forward and back in time, I muted the music and fought her without that, muted the voice sounds (This was a helova first fight because hornet sure does announce her attacks) and I needed to only go in and mute when she said something so you could still hear the attack noises. Then I realized I’d need to manually put in some of those sounds myself because it’s super noticeable when she does an attack and the SFX isn’t there. Whoo boy did this one teach me how to do a looooot of that stuff. And ultimately I’m surprised it came out as good as it did. Especially ‘cus I was on a time crunch with this one. Some of the cuts are a little awkward but still. Like, so much of the fundamentals I do when editing a fight scene I brute forced learning here I’m surprised it has the same flow as the rest of the fight scenes in these videos. Shocking to come back to this one and see how much *did* work.

So, first bit of lore building here. Hornet was a character I already had plans for. She was gonna be the star of the Silksong series. So I already had her pretty characterized as essentially a dumb nerd who didn’t have any friends, spent most of her time alone, talking to herself, and was hyperfocused on combat and combat history. And, thing is, I don’t know all that much about combat history, but I do know about film history! So I just kinda simplified it, replace some names with bug names and was like “Yeah that’s good.” And so that began. I’ve got a very Yes And theory about writing. I’ve always been hugely influenced by The Venture Brothers. The way a lot of that show goes is “Hey we invented this character as a funny joke background character in season two, now it’s season five and their tragic backstory is integral to the plot.” Retcons are boring. Take the thing that was true and make it true in whatever situation. There’s Do not change a character to suit the tone, leave them as they are and have the struggle with the tone. And for gods sake don’t flanderize them. A character grows every second their on screen, and sometimes they outgrow their joke. But it’s okay if they outgrow their joke, the new joke that they’ve grown into is *much funnier because it required that growth*!

And the fighting history stuff I’ll talk more about on episode three because that was then I actually solidified what the story was gonna be.

Also I might get into the dreamers a little bit more there too. But their characters stuck out there. The joke I set up about The Pale King being garbage at sex but that Herrah loved to brag about getting him in the sack is one I planned out *from* this episode. Finally got to see it pay off! Also speaking of Herrah, that was the first time I got Ponk in here! Always does a great job! Unfortunately, she used her Discord Mic here. This one wasn’t a situation where she didn’t have a good mic. She just forgot to use the good one and I completely forgot she is also really into audio stuff too and would jump at the chance to use her fancy stuff. She has been since!

And that’s episode 2!

[stenka-razin]

Grammy Live Performances Reviewed

Dua Lipa: it was fine, but I don't remember much of it. Didn't help that I don't think I know these songs at all.

Luke Combs & Tracy Chapman doing Fast Car: Dunno why this was second, eyes were pissing tears immediately. This is one of better ideas for a Grammy Performances. You have all these artists under one roof, make 'em work together! Anyway, it was good.

SZA: SZA was good and the choreography was solid. I don't know much SZA though, but it sounded nice enough.

Billie Eilish: (sharp inhale into the mic) why (sharp inhale into the mic) did (sharp inhale into the mic) billie (sharp inhale into the mic) eilish (sharp inhale into the mic) sing (sharp inhale into the mic) like (sharp inhale into the mic) this? Seriously sounded like she ran a 5k before singing. Also I didn't like the song.

Miley Cyrus: Miley did Flowers, a song I think is whatever, but her performance was fine enough. Except she kept making incredibly cringe adlibs. Like when she admonished the crowd "don't act like y'all don't know this song." That became a running gag for us. Not great but I laughed a lot.

Olivia Rodrigo: If you buy the Olivia Rodrigo/Taylor Swift feud rumors, you'd half to imagine that she was quietly seething all night. She performed Vampire, a song allegedly about Taylor Swift, right before Taylor won an award they were both nominated for and announced a new album. Olivia proceeded not to win anything. Anyhow, her performance was fine, but the song is not my thing. She didn't overunder sing it like Billie or do stupid crowd engagement like Miley at least.

U2: U2 did a new U2 song. I don't super care, but always good to see them still remaining defiantly in their own lane. But really this was less about the music and more a glorified ad for Las Vegas' Sphere. I think I would throw up if I saw a show in that thing. Maybe that's the point. Dead & Co have a residency in there and I'm wondering how that'll be. It seems like a venue built for artist with sick ass laser light shows. Not meandering psyched tinge bluegrass jams. I just don't get Vegas I guess. Last time I was there for a layover that took forever and some dude attempted to shoot his family in the parking lot of the airport. Bad vibes man. Oh I was talking about U2?

Stevie Wonder, Annie Lennox, Wendy & Lisa, Jon Batiste, Ann Nesby, Cory Henry, Jimmy Jam & Terry Lewis, and Fantasy: Woo! Yeah this was the immemorial segment, and really it was a series of consecutive performances. Notably, Stevie Wonder dueted with Tony Bennett's ghost. Annie Lennox did Nothing Compares 2 U and called for a ceasefire, and it climaxed in Fantasia's big Proud Mary romp. Also for some reason in the middle we got a 20 second clip of Jimmy Buffet. No other deceased performer got a standalone sound bite so it was weird. All in all it was pretty good, though ran sacharine as you can expect these in memorium segments to.

Joni Mitchell, Brandi Carlisle, others: Joni's still got it! She did Both Sides Now, backed by a band consisting of wiki tells me are accomplished musicians int heir own right.

Travis Scott & Playboi Carti: This SUCKED! First off, both these dudes music is entirely production driven. That's fine (I mean, more so for Scott since he actually does a lot of his own beats) but it absolutely does not translate to compelling live shows. Travis Scott is so fucking corny, he's out here in his fake muscles trying to hulk out, when he looks like a withered pillhead. Also I have no idea why you'd book a performer where every other line needs to be muted out of the livestream. Anyway, he can't rap for shit and this was god awful.

Burna Boy, 21 Savage, Brandy: This was great! I didn't know much Burna Boy but this was a fun performance and everyone was very good. Brandy is still great?

Billy Joel: It's no surprise Billy Joel can still perform. For all the to do about him not putting out new music for decades, it overlooks that he's still on the road constantly. But yeah, the new Billy Joel song sounds like an old Billy Joel song, so that's probably for the best. Then he did You Might Be Right, one of those consummately uncool songs that I enjoy anyway.

[okimargarvez]

"I don't flirt with you, it's my mission statement"

-12x1

"But you're still gonna have to figure out how to be nice to me.” “I am nice. I am like the Queen of nice.” “Maybe like the Queen of ice.” “Ok. Ok. Look. This is my nice face. Ha Ha. I gave you that.” ��� So, Garcia” “Yeah, what about it?” “I don't know, is that from the little known blond-haired Swedish Garcias?” “Actually it's from the family that took me in after my parents died. So, thanks for reminding me of that painful memory.” “So what are you doing tonight, chica, huh? Hang out with your Canadian boyfriend that totally exists?” “Ok, he does totally exist. And he's not Canadian. And why does it matter what we're doing? What are you doing, Mr. Tall, dark, and blandsome?” “Just kickin' it with Roxy.” “Huh. Who's that?” “That's my girl. Yeah, you should meet her sometime. You'd love her.” “Yeah. Does she love you?” “Yeah, she adores me.” “Tell her to call me when she's come to her senses.”

-12x4

"I thought you were talking about your girlfriend, you know, I thought you were being all fatheaded and macho.” “I know.” “You know?” “Yeah. I know you didn't want to like me at first, so I figured I'd make it easier on you.” “So you profiled me?” “Luke Alvez, behavioral analyst. That's what I do.”

-12x5

“It's just a little something.” “For me?” “No, not for you. It's for Roxy. But you have opposable thumbs, so you can open it for her.” “Wow. Biscuits.” “Yeah. They're all organic. Human grade. Quite delicious, if I do say so myself. Uh, plus…” “It's a sweater.” “Oh! Isn't it amazing?” “It is… Amazing.” “What was that?” “Huh? What was what?” “You paused.” “No, I didn't.” “You don't like it.” “No, I didn't I didn't say that.” “Oh, you might be a profiler in training, but I'm a profiler by association, and I can tell a lie when I hear one, and liar.”

"I may not be able to prevent myself. From random acts of dog kindness. Not every day, mind you, because that would be excessive.” “Oh, yeah. And you're the queen of moderation.” “I am the Queen of it.”

-12x8

“You couldn't find anything out with all your super powers?” “Oh, ha ha, newbie. It's not like I haven't tried. [...] I'm declaring a dictatorship. You guys don't get a vote. Especially you, newbie.”

“Hey, you’re forgetting something” “I’m forgetting nothing, newbie”

-12x16

“What do you want, newbie?” “Still with that? Come on. You need some new material” “Ok, whatever you say El Nuevo. Hunky Newster. New kid on the no, that one's too much on the nose.”

-12x17

“It was luck. It was timing. I cry all the time. I'm a very sensitive person. I am glad you're here, ok? But I am never going to stop giving you crap, Luke.” “Hey. Penelope.” “Hmm? “You know, that's the first time” “Shut it.” “You call me by my” “Let's be in the moment.”

-13x3

“Do not look at me. I have been telling him this is going to sail right over the gentle minds at his seminar.” “Wait, I got it. [...] Garcia's right. That's way too esoteric.” “I told you. Look, just say, "when you assume you make an ass of u and me, because then you can say "ass" in a classroom. Huh?”

“Cool hand Luke, what you need?” “Wow, I like the way that sounds, Garcia. You feeling ok?” “I am naturally magnanimous in word and deed, and when it comes your way, bask in it. What do you want?” “Listen..." [...] “I am the genie in genealogy. Just rub my lamp. That came out wrong. Goodbye.” “Wow.”

-13x10

“Bowling trophies, seriously?” “I just reports the facts as I find them, sir”

-13x11

“Garcia, are your ears burning?” “My ears are the same temperature as the rest of my body hot. Oh, that sounds like flirting. I don't flirt with you. It's in my mission statement."

-14x6

"How dare you bury the lede? How did the big move-in go?” “It was great.” “So Lisa's all moved in?” “She is.” “Details. Luke, give me details or I'm gonna get grumpy with you like I always do.”

-14x8

“Speak of the devil. So, I hear you and I are gonna be lab partners.” “Ugh! Blerg! Fleh! Whatever. If I must."

“Ok, guys, so it looks like” “Ah-ah-ah-ahem.” “Like Garcia has some things she wants to tell you.” “Mm-hmm. I'm about to say the same thing as Luke was going to, but with far more chutzpah, wit, and eloquence."

"I think we're the dynamic duo. Come on. Hit me.” “Oh, puh-lease. We will never be a "duo. Uh-uh.” “Well, come on. Admit it. I helped.” “Oh! Heh! You'd have to torture me. You'd have to force me to wear beige, deny me of all things unicorn for me to ever admit that you helped."

-14x11

“I'm telling you, I don't want a housewarming party.” “What is wrong with you? Who doesn't like ribbon-adorned potted plants and veggie cruditè and hummus with your face carved in it? Do you even fondue, bro?” “We've got bigger fish to fry here. It's life and death, and a housewarming party just seems stupid.”

“Ok. Methinks thou dost protest too much about this whole not liking a housewarming thing. Where's Lisa?” “She got called away at the last minute to cover night shift, so I guess E.R. doctors come with a perfectly built-in, acceptable excuse to not be at their own parties, even if it was their own idea in the first place.” “As do FBI agents. Anyway, don't be rude. Open my gift.” “Ok.” “Come on. Just open the gift.” “Ooh, ok.” “Yay!” “All right. Well, look. I'm beginning to understand the value of a housewarming party. Thank you.”

-14x14

“I'm actually calling you with a list of my own. I've got 5 more places the unsub might be targeting next. They're a little lesser known, but they fit the parameters haunted, violent history, right in the unsub's comfort zone.” “Thanks, Garcia. Why don't you give us a call back once you get a handle on Courtney's list.” “Oh, Alvez, have you heard of multitasking? It's all the rage, I'm really good at it, and I'm doing it right now.” “Yeah, I'm sure you were. Don't get me wrong. You're great, but Rossi literally just sent you that list.” “Yeah, well, I'm more than simply great. I'm entirely fantastic.”

-14x15

“Hey, where have you been? We've all been waiting.” “I was waiting to see if Lisa was gonna have to work an extra shift, and she does, so maybe she'll make it later. Can I please have one of your fancy drinks?” “Because you asked nicely, you can. Oh, my gosh, you guys, did you guys hear? Johnny Mathis is Rossi's best man.” “Of course he is.”

-15x4

“Oh. Now, should we bring in the rest of the team? Because we do have that holding us up.” “Do you remember, like, 30 seconds ago, when you thanked us? Yeah. We were so young then.” “Anyway…” […] “Alvez will be going with me to Elizabeth's apartment. Now, she says no one's broken in, but I'm not convinced, so let me get her keys so we can check it out. And now we will… Wheels up.” “We're not going anywhere.” “Shut up, shut up. Just because you look like that doesn't mean you can do whatever you want with this part of your face. How does Prentiss make this look easy? Ok, come on!

-15x7

“Garcia, have you found any overlap socially?” “Do I have to start calling you newbie again?” “Ok. So you would have led with that.”

“So our initial interview with Sean's case worker Brenda Hacker didn't raise any red flags, but she was the last person to see him alive, so I did some additional spelunking.” “And?” “Welcome to the thunderdome. [...] Like, get yourself to Vegas, call your bookie, the fix is in unusual.” “You think she's greasing the wheels?” “Oh, she's lubing them up big time. Uh, stop smiling, Luke Alvez. I can feel it. That joke was not for you.” […] “Penelope.” “New phone. Who dis?” “Thank you.” “You should worship at my throne, Luke Alvez.” “Oh, but I do. I do. You know I do.” “What does that even mean?”

-15x10

“This is from Lunacorn. Luke Alvez, stop making me like you.” “Ha! Never.”

[...]

“Wait, moving out of here like the Colts did Baltimore?” “Ok, no one knows what that means.”

-16x1

“You owe me some very short cookies.” “Just admit it, okay? You miss me.” “You know what? First of all, it's gross to talk with your mouth full, and also, I have banned the 24-hour news and doom scrolling, so whatever it is you're talking about, I don't even know and I can't tell you how well that works for me. Who'd you lose the bet to?” “It wasn't a bet.” “Tell JJ I love her, but I can't. No, I just can't. I thought for a second I could, but I can't. You have destroyed my party, but not my day. Take your carbs and exit, sir.” [...] “One time. One time. Once.” “Deal.” “Like, for reals. If somebody is oh, I don't know. Let's say they're taking dead people and dressing them up like like cast members from "Star Trek", I am not helping.” “Deal.” “Okay? I mean it. And if someone if someone just starts killing everybody who shops at Goop because their wife blew her hoo-ha out with one of those eggs made of precious stones, I am not helping!” “Look, we're on a clock.” “Okay. I created "SOAR" to avoid things like this. I mean, users are protected through an end-to-end encryption with a VPN built in on both ends. You have no idea what I'm saying, do you, Luddite?" [...] "Gah! I hate how easy it is to pick this back up! So why are you doing I have a gorgeous life here!” “One, stop slapping me, okay? That's number one. Number two, eh, let's focus on what the UnSub's hunting ground would be, okay?" [...] “It's less annoying when he's not there, correct?” “You just couldn't wait to get started on me?”

[...] “You know that your office is still empty? You know, the four people that try to do your job, they try to do it from home.” “Have you ever met them?” “Never.” “Do you know their names?” “Sorta. I mean, they're just boxes on a screen.” “Oh, that's weird.” “Totally.” “Is it weird that I kind of love it?” “Define weird.”

-16x4

"Good morning, Penelope." "Thank for entering my cleansed lair. Can I ask you something?" "If you're gonna ask me to look after your cat again, I am gonna have to get an allergy prescription from the doctor." "No. But on behalf of Sergio and all senior cats everywhere, we appreciate you putting your immune system on the line like that for him. I've been spelunking into Tyler Green's past... [..] What do you think?" "I think it's a great idea." "And the rumor is you're difficult to work with. Oh, wait. I started that rumor. Hey, we got a case." "Let's pitch Emily after we brief." "Uh, no, you will pitch Emily." "Oh, no, I will not." "Yes." "This was your idea." "Yes, it was, but I brought it to you." [...] "Go talk to her." "Right." "Now's the time. Come on. Let's go." "No, I'm not. You need to go and talk to her. You should tell her." "It's all right." "No, no." "It was your idea." "It's your thing. It's kind of in your house of wheels." [...] "But after your first go around with him, are you sure you can convince him to sit for it?" "I don't..." "Yes is the answer." "Okay, I don't... I'm being honest. I don't know."

-16x8

"Um, is this all you could find?" "Oh, for now, my liege, but I shall keep digging." "Wait, what was that?" "What was what?" "Like, where's the snark? Like, a comment about how amazing it is that I can tie my own shoes or a question about how I got into the FBI wearing caveman overalls and carrying a big wooden club." "You're funny. That's funny. A club? No, don't be so hard on yourself."

-16x9

“What were we thinking?” “I don't know. But why? I mean, it's... It's not like this when we're at work.” “Yes. Can I share my truth with you?” “When have you ever not?” “I find it very hard to have a conversation with you when I am not dunking on you.” “That is cold.” “With us, there absolutely is something there, but not that. And you're so great. I'm so great. I know that your person is out there. I know that my person is out there.” “Where? Thank you.” “I don't know. But I hope I know when I find them. And now that I know you're not trying to get me drunk, I'm gonna do so on my own volition.” “Well, okay. Whatever it takes. To finding the right person.”

-16x10

"I guess, if people didn't, we might all be out of a job, right?" "Yeah. But I... I did catch myself, and I did course-correct. What's that thing... Oh. What's that thing that Emily Dickinson says?" "The heart wants what it wants, or else it doesn't care." "You know Emily Dickinson?" "I... I know that quote."

Other pic posts

[ask-hannah-blog]

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays Honkers!!!

Pretzel again!🥨🤡 Just been living my life thinking of you and how fucking sexy you're getting love! ❤️ 😍 💖 ❣️ 💕 💘

Been following your advice and giving my plushies plenty of attention these past couple days and I gotta say the new greasy burger joint smell my flat took on these past couple days has been great! Having your body produce its own food is super convenient too I practically don't have to shop for food anymore! Well, unless if I wanna spread my mayo on some other salty snack heheheheheheh! Hyuck that reminds me my feet haven't been the only thing that have grown! My new diet is super good and yummy but I've been packing on some extra weight because of it! A big pot belly! Look good on me to be honest, feels like I was always meant to be a greasy gassy lard hog, y'know?

I finally found a use for my dumb buckteeth! 🤪 they're bottle openers durrr! I shoulda guessed!

Anyways I figured for Christmas I'd treat myself a bit and got a nice mani/pedi (my hands with my colors, and my toes with yours!), and you'll never guess who I ran into! A real Christmas miracle! My old friend toe cleavage! Now as tempted as I was to jump her right there and thank her for all the progress she's helped me make as a clown I did my best to keep my sausage at bay and chat it up with her. Proper girl talk you know? Even if I think she was a bit freaked out by the fact that my feet could cover her entire face hyuck! 😳

Well anyway, as luck would have it, she's actually looking for a new therapist. So I figured I'd give her your information! If you get a call from her and she schedules an appointment, you know what to do, "Honey toes"! Up to you if you wanna send her back after she's done cooking. I wouldn't want my Queen to think I'm selfish!

That's all from me for now, but don't worry I didn't forget about that trade offer of yours! I'm thinking of buying a proper camera and put the video of me going down on my feet up online so all the pervs out there can really enjoy my brand of foot worship heheehhe hyuck! It'll be my gift to our amazing community!

Pretzel out, keep up the good work Hannah ✌️😘

Merry Christmas!

Lol Pretzel you nasty girl, living off a diet of mayonnaise and soda pop. When your makeup comes in you’re going to have a bunch of red dots on your face to act as clown acne, you greasy freak!

Good girl playing with your plushies like I told you! Mmmm your greasy babies have got to be taking after their mama by now. Isn’t that right? Their fur is getting ratty and knotted, crusty with your stinky cum. I bet your cum has been bleaching them, their fur turning white over time, while their noses inflate into big red balls for you to honk. Their faces have changed too I bet. They’ve all got big stupid Buck teeth now, just like their mama. But that’s not what I’m talking about, is it? No, but you know what I mean. Their faces look more…. Perverted now don’t they? Some are making Ahegao faces, others are just leering, watching you fuck and molest their furry friends with obvious glee. They’ve gotten bigger, haven’t they? You’re not the only one living on a diet of your cum. With how much they’ve absorbed they’ve been getting fat, getting little teddy beer bellies, big bunny titties, phat fox phannies! They just look so weird and freakish now, not like cute little stuffies at all huh? That’s because they’re sex toys, you in all your cartoonish perversion turned them into sex toys. Each of them is strapped with a colorful rubber clowny cock, or a slick greasy pussy. Lately your idea of playing with your stuffies has been riding a thick plastic bunny cock with your ass pussy, farting on him with every drop, while you plunge a slutty little piggy doll down on your weiner. It’s perfect for you! A gassy hog like Pretzel would have a big gross collection of perverted sex plushies wouldn’t she? Maybe the cute trans girl she used to be, whatever her name was would have cute sweet little stuffies, but not our Pretzel!

I bet your pot is sooooo cute! Why are you so perfect? I didn’t even think that you’d be blowing up too, how cute! Deep belly button? Fun to tongue? What’s it taste like? Can I bury my nose in it and just get lost in the smell?

And silly Pretzel your Buck teeth always had a purpose! They made sure that no one took you seriously, or thought of you as a real person! But the can opener trick is cute too!

Mani pedi you go girl! Treat yourself! I love that you have both our colors it’s like we’re married! 🥹 plus anyone who sees my colors in your yummy clown fleet will know instantly who you belong to! 👸 I think all my loyal clowny subjects should do the same and give praise to Pretzel for allowing them to show their devotion to me!

I don’t know how you were able to sit through an entire pedicure without without just losing your mind! I’m just imagining these poor Asian ladies trying to paint your big clowny toe tails while you’re sitting there in the chair chuckling your head off while your big girl cock is flinging strings of mayoie cum everywhere.

Even if you were able to keep yourself in control I don’t know how they managed to stop themselves from putting those delicious salty pretzel bites you call toes into their mouth. Mmm just being so close to that warm bready smell must have been soooooooooo tempting for them! Hoooooonk!

BUT NONE OF THAT MATTERS!

Because!

AAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!

HOT TOE CLEAVAGE!

As in:

As in

I got you girl don’t even sweat it!

I don’t even know why she needs a therapist, but I know becoming a fart sniffing clown is the treatment! Hyuck! Trust me guys! I got the degree!

Studies show becoming Pretzel’s devoted clown slave significantly increase a person’s happiness!

Gosh, I just don’t know how I’m going to stop myself from fucking her the moment she comes into my office! I mean you’ve just been teasing me and bragging about those hot pictures you have of her I feel like when i finally see them I’ll go nuts! I mean her toes, they pretty much single handily perverted you! I won’t stand a chance! 😱 Hehehehe!

What kind of girlie should we make for Pretzel guys?!?! Definitely going to give her a big pink beehive hairdo and her hair will become cotton candy! Then she could man your pervy little snack stand with you!

Do you want her fat, or do you want to do that yourself? ;)

Should she keep her pussy, or grow a peepee? If so how big?!??

Should she be slobby like you, or do you want a cute little sugary bimbo who puts up with all your nastiness because you’re soooooooooo cute?!???

Hehe okay, I’m masturbating way too hard to all of this! Just so excited to give Pretzel the girl of her dreams! Hehehe!

[tea-with-evan-and-me]

just imagine my ask box receiving several of these anonymous novels from gftwd and her lost stans.. like, are you okay? are you alright? 🤨

AND? do you think you need to launch a federal investigation about me because i wanted to create a “extra nice, inclusive space” for people to talk about evan peters gossip? 😭 if that’s what gftwd was trying to do, she failed. she flopped. you’re super weird for writing all these long ass messages instead of, i don’t know.. doing literally anything else with your time. it’s not that deep. i’m now aware of at least two other blogs who focus on evan peters gossip and neither of them have any problems, either, because they are kind and respectful to people who talk to them. i don’t see them having to delete their accounts or fight with folks. i get asks every day that i delete because they would cause arguments or purposely spread untrue information. i routinely ignore asks that are specifically targeting me because something i said ruffled feathers. i don’t care. this is the internet, where everyone is anonymous and bold. it does not hurt my feelings. i get repetitive asks constantly asking basic things like “is evan single” that we’ve already discussed to death on my page, and i don’t feel the urge to say rude, mean things in response. gftwd would tear you a new asshole if you asked something that irritated her when all she had to do was delete it and move on. you are acting like running a tumblr blog is some immensely stressful ordeal and gftwd just snapped because one too many people asked about evan’s dating life. who the fuck cares? if you don’t like people asking questions why the hell are you a tea blog? i do this because i find it fun and i have a ton of free time on my hands this winter. if you’re doing it because you are on a power trip and it makes your pussy tingle to insult people, mock them, kick them out of discord servers and tag your “friend” to come and say insanely cruel things then you need to go call a therapists office and cut off your internet connection ❤️ have a blessed sunday

[marcelinesghost13]

Hi Blog,

So I had another argument with my spouse. This is the part that I don't get.... Like for a couple days she's super nice and very loving and caring and then all of a sudden it's just boom you can go fuck yourself. I get the whole bipolar thing but what the fuck. I'm so tired of this up and down with her. Then she wants me to come back home but why? For I can be belittled and gaslighted and treated like crap again... No thank you... And when I tell her these things she tells me that's a lie that she doesn't do that. Which is complete total fucking bullshit because she's been doing it for fucking years.

So I did some running around because I've been up since like 5:30 in the morning because something happened at the gas station up the road woke my ass up. It is about 1300 (1:00 pm) hours and I got a text from my spouse. And I happen to be getting something to eat so I asked her if she was hungry even though the night before she started a fight with me I thought I'd be the decent human being. So I got her a Laguna Burger and took it up to the house. Everything was okay we were getting along... And then once again fucking boom.... She started fighting and arguing with me and asked me why I won't come the fuck home. But she just kept on talking and arguing and I didn't get a fucking word in. Finally I did and she got pissed off on what I had to say. So she stormed off to her bedroom slamming the door and locking it like she always does. I figured fuck it I'm going to grab my cat and a litter box and take him home with me. She heard me doing this and that pissed her off some more. Then I try to say something because she kept on letting me know that I was acting like a child. And she got pissed again and walked away. I saw that as my opportunity to leave which I did. And then after I left she started blowing up my phone I was driving home... This is that conversation that took place on my phone...

Wife

So you walked away again, at sone point i need to know why I am going through all this dor someone who is Never comming back

I dont need a helper your my husband

You married me then just walked out

So is never comming home true?

This is an obvious game if you want me counseling and wont come home or be a part of my life

Your always somewhere else with someone else , hope u are happy with your choices, you destroyed our life, because you could never even try to be happy here, i can see iysan excise, just yell at me to fuck off to be in communication with your friends, hope they make you happy

this will never be resolved, because u cant be bothered

Me

No this won't be resolved because you don't care to listen to what I have to say.

wife

And u dont hear me and...

me

For years you have used me as a punching bag every time you get angry upset or whatever it is you let me know how much of a piece of shit human being I am and how I'm doing everything absolutely fucking wrong. And then there's the constant breaking my phone's breaking my stuff constantly hitting me all the time I'm not doing that anymore and yet you don't see that part of the relationship

Oh I'm hearing you loud and clear

And you keep on thinking those ideas that you have in your head that I'm hanging out with my friends and then I'm fucking someone behind your back like I always am because I'm cheating bastard like that or at least that's what you let me know

wife

Because all i get is vacant stares

Because u were never there

And all those friends i didnt know, but you sure did

me

I've always been here I've always been there you're the one that has decided that I haven't inside your mind's mind you have come to that conclusion

wife

Really?

My memories are wrong again lol

me

I've said that from the beginning your perspective of his marriage and my perspective of this marriage are completely totally different

wife

Of course they are when you try and gaslight

me

I don't think mean you will ever see eye to eye

You're the one that gaslights

wife

Sure i with that

Sure, anyway Go with that

me

And this is all we do is fight back and forth I'm tired of doing this

wife

All this...for what?

So you can leave, and be in dependant on your own.

Because life is too hard for you to be a part of

So you left to escape problems you refuse to acknowledge

me

Whatever... I'll go off and be the little girl that acts like a teenage brat that's what you said right

wife

Midlife crisis

me

I'm done talking

wife

Lol ok

That was so useless to talk to you again

me

ditto

Wife

Do what you have too

Ignore me, your lifei s so much better you said without me anyway, because working doing SHIT for me and your dad, didnt make happy, so keep doing whayever it is over there to be a happy girl.

There you go that's a normal argument between me and my spouse.. it's really fucking stupid and childish. She doesn't listen to a fucking thing that I have to tell her. She doesn't want to hear anything. She's beyond angry. And everything that she's texting is just out of anger and hatred. But what should I expect her favorite fucking character in cinema is Darth Vader God damn fucking Anakin Skywalker. And she always likes the sith with their anger and their hatred and all that other fucking bullshit that Seth do but you know what else see if they're narcissistic is fuck. And I'm done being with a fucking sith.

101220241705

[rhazimpulsivelyposts]

My dad was an fboi who accidentally had a child that the mother was too mentally unfit to take care of ~ so we moved around A LOT! I mean like every 2 or 3 years I would have to pack up everything I could carry and we were leaving.

We lived with this woman named Diane off and on for years because my dad and her had a super toxic relationship. We lived with her at her dads , then my dad went to jail so I went to foster care, I get out of foster care and we live with her again in a different house , then my dad went back to jail and I went back to foster care, then I’m back with my dad and Diane but they get into a fight and he kicks her out but now he can’t afford the house . -> then we live with some guy my dad worked with and I legit slept on a couch for a year and then in a small bed in that guys daughters room with his daughter who was younger than me for a year or so. -> then we lived back with Diane and her kids in a small ass house, then we all moved into a nice bigger house, but then as “pay back” so my dad says she kicks us out “like he kicked her out last time” . -> then we go live with my uncle and aunt for a year or two -> then my dad gets us a duplex that we live in for a year or something, but he gets fired for drinking because it’s always that -> we go back and live with my uncle and aunt for a year or so , but then we get kicked out because my dad has a relationship with this flirty girl who flirts with other guys when she’s drunk and my dads emotional when he’s drunk and he starts a big ass fight and gets us kicked out .

After all that I’m now just like 9? We go and live with his mother because he has no options left. His abusive Catholic mother who had 5 kids and abused and neglected all of them. Cool. Probably why 2 of her kids are dead now, one left at 18 never to talk to anyone again, one is doing alright , and the other one is my dad. When we moved in with her he stopped acting like a dad and started acting like she was OUR MOM! At 9… bro what? He would let me “sneak out of the house” at like 2am when I was 13 , but would make me hop the back fence because “Lois can’t know ok?” Why? She’s not my parent you are? Fcking weird. He stopped working because he’s drunk all the time, and lives off my child support for YEARS! I had no idea. Child support and food stamps.

Anyways that was a trauma dump back story just for me to tell you we had a garage fridge, but really it was just a big freezer in the kitchen that he would fill with microwave snacks and food so that I could eat that and he would never have to cook for me or teach me how to cook 🙃

[lizardlicks]

I came out on the worst possible way imaginable.

See way back in 2015 I had already figured out that I was queer, but at the time I was really easy to read as straight and cis. I made the consciousness choice not to come out, not from any fear of repercussion, but because I thought I could do better work for the community as an ally.

I posted on face book a lot. My family are all conservatives, but not the frothing at the mouth extremist kind. They vote part ticket because that's what they've always done. The very lukewarm milk and white toast kind of every day people who still believed the party lies of republicans being the good and moral party who would stand up for working class middle America.

Trump was running for office but it didn't look like his numbers were doing all that good. I had lots of long, thoughtful conversations with friends and extended family. I did the work to post informative links with sources. It seemed like I was actually reaching people.

And then Trump won the election. I watched my queer friends panic. My disabled friends talked about finding homes for their pets so that they could kill themselves with a guilt free conscience because they expected the ACA to be gutted, which would mean a slow, lingering death for them anyway. I spent hours in DM's talking several people down from the edges of dispair, begging then not to give up hope yet.

I dragged my exhausted ass into work the next morning with zero sleep and a pounding head, and spent the next eight hours getting nothing done because I feared coming home to the news that someone I care about might have already thrown in the towel while I was stuck out of reach. When I did log on, I saw one of my conservative family members posts. Something about the losing team should be a good sport, it's not the end of the world and better luck next time. I lost it.

I came out in a facebook rant. "I'm trans and queer," I said. "Know that if you voted red, you voted to kill me. That is not hyperbole. You voted for people who want me dead and my family torn apart. No one is acting like a sore loser, we're acting scared for our lives because we are, and we have convincing evidence to be. The next time you want to talk to me about how you voted because of xyz issue, look me in the eye and remember that was more important to you than me and my friends being alive."

My conservative family didn't say much. My dad replied saying that if anyone went after me he'd kill them... Which a nice sentiment, but missed the point entirely because guns don't stop structural bigotry. He then sent me a blatantly biased oped about how no Pence wasn't REALLY opposed to gays, you guys, chill out!

My spouse's family were a bunch of old school liberals and autistic weirdos. They rallied and sent me so much support, with my mother in law being the loudest. I miss her so much-- not a day went by between then and her last day where she wasn't sending me some uplifting news article or something super gay that she found.

I don't regret coming out. I wish I had done it sooner. It probably wouldn't have made a difference, but at the minimum, hiding who I really was had been so pointless and tedious. If you haven't yet, don't feel like you have to. Coming out is not a required part of the queer narrative. You need to do what's in your best interest for being safe and happy. But my god if it hurts you, don't cut yourself down to fit something more palatable. It's not worth it.