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enkas-illusion · 8 months

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Double Trouble

Fandom / Pairing: Jujutsu Kaisen / Gojo Satoru x f!reader

Rating: SFW

Genre/Theme: Established relationship; non-sorcery au

Content warning: fluff, suggestive, no smut, language.

Summary: Boyfriend!Satoru with a twin and they're exact copies of each other, down to their mannerism so they often switch places just to test how long it takes for you to figure out you're talking to the other one.

Author's Note: The one where he isn’t the only Honoured one. I hope you enjoy this one shot. Thank you for reading!

~ Eren’s Birdie

Song Dedication: Say Yes by Loco, Punch

Satoru Gojo was everything you could've asked for in a partner. He was kind, funny, intelligent, sexy, and had better emotional maturity than most men despite being somewhat of a nihilist in his own way – perfect was the word to describe him.

The only problem was that he was a bit too much to handle at times, or dare one say, a bit *too many, – meaning his mother gave birth to him and thought ‘he's perfect!’ so she popped another xerox copy 2 minutes later.

And thus were born Satoru and Soichiro, the most identical twins in the history of twins. The two not only shared the same face but had gained quite some notoriety among friends and family for sharing the same brain cell as well.

While you had no reason to complain about their flawless personalities, they'd taken a liking to mess with you each time they got together. One would think they'd go easy with the pranks if it's someone they love, right? Wrong! It meant the shit you had to endure was way worse than any other normal friend would have to.

On one such instance, Soichiro tagged along with Satoru after work and it wasn't until halfway through dinner that your instinct went off and you figured out it was the twin who was sitting next to you instead of your boyfriend as usual. Later that night, you'd warned Satoru about it, presenting a solid argument even he couldn't resist.

“You know I almost grabbed his thigh under the table tonight!”

“No, you didn't,” Satoru scoffed.

“Okay, maybe not. But it’s highly likely that I could've! Ummm… what if one day you return home and I greet you in some skimpy lingerie but instead of you, it’s your brother who sees me, all titties out???” You were grasping at straws really.

“Will you do that!?” His ears perked up.

“Not the point, Toru…”

“Hmm… okay fine, I won't let it get that far,” he assured you.

“But you'll still continue to tease me?” You huffed and he nodded his head, smiling innocently. You rolled your eyes at him, complaining about how he was the ‘worst’ while he simply gave you a bear hug and a few kisses to make it up to you.

~~~

So, even after being with Satoru for more than a year, you still did not know how to distinguish between the two. The only people to do so in a split-second were his parents. You had once sat the twins down to compare their faces for any tiny details you might’ve missed but you came up short regardless.

You could only tell the difference by instinct, after having a conversation with them – maybe you were more delusional than you'd like to admit but to you, Satoru's voice held a lot of love each time he called your name.

In an attempt to distinguish the two, you thought you'd successfully managed to get Satoru to dye his hair black with temporary colour last time you went to their family house, only to find out Soichiro had done the same and was waiting for you, waving his arm at you in the driveway with a victorious grin.

So when you don't find the twin greeting you like a devil inviting you to hell this time, you turn to your boyfriend who's undoing his seatbelt.

“Listen to me, Satoru,” you grab his collar to turn him to look at you as you speak in a serious tone, “Please don't fuck with me this time. One of these days, I might really embarrass myself due to your games.”

“I'm betting on it baby,” he grins as he gives you a quick peck before swiftly making his way out of the car to avoid your scolding. You were going to stay at his parents’ country house for a weekend and you could already tell it was going to be a long weekend.

You sigh as you grab your bag and he opens the door for you before pulling the bag out of your hand and holding his hand out for you. It's impossible to be annoyed at Satoru for long when he pulls shit like this.

When you enter the house, Satoru excuses himself to find his father and you make your way to the backyard garden where you guess his mother might be. You smile to yourself when your guess is right.

“How can I help?” You smile, making his mother turn to look at you. She gently puts the shovel down next to the plants she's depotting.

“Hello dear, you've arrived just in time… would you mind bringing the remaining pots? They’re near the window in the reading room,” she instructs and you nod as you make your way back inside.

You walk the long corridor before you reach your destination, making your way to the window where the pots were placed. You lift two in each hand, holding them with care, trying not to drop them or stain your t-shirt.

“Need some help?” you hear a voice and turn around to see the other twin at the door. The only reason you can tell it's Soichiro is because he's wearing a grey t-shirt and black sweatpants as opposed to your boyfriend who was wearing a purple hoodie and coal grey pants.

“Hey Sochi, could you pick the last one?” You motion your head in the direction of the last pot, “Gotta move it to the garden.”

He nods before picking up the pot and walking with you, back to the backyard garden.

“Did you arrive before us? I didn't see your car in the driveway,” you make conversation along the way.

“My car's out for servicing. I arrived with the mothership yesterday when she was in town shopping,” he explains.

“Hmm…” you nod as you stop near the area where the soil has been rooted out of the ground, “here.”

You motion to him to keep the pot down and he obeys as he leans down to place them there gently. You're busy looking around to find Mrs. Gojo when you hear him speak, “Anything else, princes–”

Your eyes widen as your head snaps back to look at him.

“SATORU!” you gasp at the nickname that accidentally slips out of your boyfriend's name, making you realise it's not his twin.

“Soichiro! Leave my poor girl alone,” the other blondie walks out wearing the exact same clothes. You look between the two as you stare in disbelief, not being able to tell who's who.

You're about to speak when you hear their mom's voice as she moves closer to you, pressing an arm gently around your shoulder, “Satoru… I'd expect you of all people to be nice to her,” shaking her head at the twin standing next to you.

You were right! The twin next to you is Satoru!

“No, it's okay! The best way to deal with them is to avoid both of them the entire weekend,” you give your boyfriend the fakest smile you can muster up as you walk hand in hand with his mother to fulfil your gardening duties.

As it's the only exact identical matching outfit the twins have, they don't mind wearing it all weekend. As the day progresses, you find yourself working your brain full time to notice any difference you can find, but the guys are relentless to the point where even their sleeves are rolled to the exact same length.

And of course, the whole day is spent the way you’d dreaded and almost predicted it’d be like. Later when you’re out on the porch having coffee and watching the sunset with your boyfriend, you notice Satoru has an insect bite on the side of his wrist.

“Toru?” you question, wanting to make sure you have the right twin next to you.

“Hmm?” he peels his eyes away from the pretty sunset to look at you.

“Kiss me?” you ask softly.

“Wha– is this a test?” He raises an eyebrow.

“You know what, nevermind… I just felt like it cause this is the first time we’ve been alone all d–” your words are cut off by his lips capturing yours. You smile into the kiss as Satoru cups your face, caressing your cheek.

Satoru check completed! You make a mental note to observe his wrist for the mark each time you interact with the twins.

After dinner when everyone's lazing around in the living room and watching whatever reality tv show is playing in the background, you excuse yourself to go to the washroom. Roaming around, you end up in Satoru's old bedroom. It's endearing seeing how you can still find pieces of his current personality, likes, hobbies and interests in bits, plastered everywhere around his room.

You find yourself craving some alone time with your boyfriend all of a sudden so you pull your phone out to text him to come up to his room. You only have to wait a few minutes before you hear a knock on the door.

“It's open,” you say as you place the book that you were holding back on the shelf. With a big grin, you extend your arm out to him and he takes it.

“Hello, darling,” he says in a playful tone and your eyes briefly glance at his wrist. No mark. It's Soichiro. He pulls you into a hug and pats your head.

Fine. If your boyfriend still wants to mess with you even when you’re needy for him, he's gonna get his payback. You decide at that moment – this switcharoo bullshit stops today.

You smile innocently at Soichiro as you pull away, your hands travel up to his chest to push him back till he falls on the bed.

You hop on top of him to straddle him but are careful enough to not actually make any sort of inappropriate contact, hovering above without closing the gap between your bodies. You simply wanted to push him enough to get him uncomfortable and to confess.

You can see the nervousness on his face as he clears his throat to come up with an excuse to get out of this situation without making it awkward, “T-the door’s open, let me–”

“It’s just us Toru… I doubt anyone��s gonna bother coming up to find us anyway,” you purr as you lean your body forward, placing your palms on the sides of his head to support your weight. You start feeling anxious too, you need him to break soon or you’d have to abandon the act, so you persist and whisper in his ear, “You look so sexy, I’ve been wanting to feel you inside me all day, Satoru.”

You cringe internally at your own words. But in that moment, you can see his face get paler than it usually is and you want to laugh at how nervous he looks when he hits his limit at your lewd comments.

“Wait, I’m no–” Soichiro pushes you by the shoulders as he begins in panic, another voice interrupts, pushing the half-open door forcefully, “Baby, wait!”

You feel a large arm hook around your waist to pull you away. As you stumble to your feet, breaking free from his hold, you turn around to see an annoyed Satoru, knitting his eyebrows as he looks at you. He looks more annoyed at himself than at you.

“Satoru?” you question as you bring up a hand to his cheek.

“Yes, baby?” he asks in that loving tone you’re so used to as he wraps his arms around your waist tighter.

You smile as you caress his cheek, trying hard to hold in your laughter, “What… A… Dumbass!”

You burst out laughing as you break free from his embrace and he stares at you in disbelief. You look from him to Soichiro, who’s already stood up from the bed as you hold your stomach, hurting from laughing so much, “That should teach you both!”

“Well then, I’m gonna go watch tv with the only two sensible people in this house,” you wave the baffled twins goodbye and turn around to leave the room. The very next second, you’re taken by surprise when you feel a hand grab your wrist to keep you from moving.

You turn around to see that your boyfriend seems… mad at you?

“Sochi, do you mind? I wanna talk to her alone,” Satoru motions his brother to leave the room.

“Yikes, just keep it quiet,” the twin chuckles in embarrassment as he walks out hastily. You hear the door close behind you before footsteps recede down the hallway.

You look at Satoru, expecting him to speak up. But your boyfriend simply grabs both of your wrists before twisting them behind your back and closes the distance between your bodies.

“Waitttt… is this Toru or Sochi? It is impossible to tell!” your words are dry and sarcastic as you giggle at him.

“Baby, I don’t think you’re in a position to be laughing at me right now,” he towers over you, his grip on your waists tightening.

“But here we are! I told you not to mess with me,” you chuckle as you try to wriggle your wrists out of his grip.

“And I’ve warned you not to press my buttons… or do I need to remind you again?” he grunts as he flips you around, walking you to the bed till your knees hit the edge of the bed, making you stumble on the mattress with him behind you. He brings a hand to the back of your head to press your face down into the mattress and you take this opportunity to try to hold him. He tsks at your movement before moving away from your completely.

You flip your body around to lie on your back and see what’s going on, only to find him rummaging through his closet. When Satoru turns around to walk back towards the bed, you notice two ties in his hands.

This isn’t how you’d expected your little prank to turn out but you definitely weren’t complaining. However, just as Satoru straddles you, grabbing your wrists, his phone buzzes in his pocket.

“What?” he groans into the speaker.

“Mum’s calling you both downstairs,” you hear Soichiro’s voice on the other end.

You press your lips together to keep yourself from laughing as Satoru groans once again before cutting the call with a ‘be right there’.

“I think god sent a guardian angel disguised as your mom for me,” you chuckle as you sit up, making your way out from under him.

“You’re lucky,” Satoru grabs your jaw, “but don’t get ahead of yourself, guardian angel can't save you past her bedtime.”

You poke your tongue out to tease him, breaking free and springing out of the bed, mumbling a ‘whatever’, walking out towards the living room.

As you make your way back down the hall, you hear your boyfriend’s footsteps behind you. You smile to yourself as you begin to brew different ideas of riling him up further throughout the night.

~fin~

#jjk x you #erensbirdie #jjk x reader #jujutsukaisen x reader #jjk #jjk gojo #gojo satoru #satoru gojo #gojo x reader #gojo smut #jujutsu gojo

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chipchopclipclop · 3 months

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i just started rewatching soul eater for the first time since i was 15 and Stein is so much more interesting to me than he was then... what are ur soul eater thoughts chip if youre willing to share

i did not experience soul eater as a wee youth, the first time i watched (and then read it) was 4 years ago (give or take) so i do not have the beautifully tinged nostalgia for the series others might. i say this only bc it colours my thoughts of the series pretty well lmao.

the anime is alot better than the manga just by virture of bones' animation being incredible but also its like 40% less painfully fucking horny (though still is its shounen) and the way some of that plot goes in the second half is so fucking bad in the manga (though not all, but god). It's not like the anime gets rid of everything like that stupid ass argument black star has with maka still makes me want to murder him but ultimately i like the anime and its writing more. i think my minds canon is just a meld of parts i like from both lol.

ohkubo is also just on my top ten list of mangaka i need to actually kill like hes a solid #3 on the needs to die list. his designs and art improvement were fun to watch and i do love halloween world and his toony stuff, undeniably bangs, but you can really tell by the end where his transformation into horny moe artist came from. sometimes i see people shocked by this and soul eater not's existence and i have to think did we read the same fucking manga...??

sorry i needed to get my bitching out before talking about stein. i love stein. so many things wrong with him. he is 70% of the reason i got around to watching it and 95% of the reason i kept reading it. i think how expressive he is is alot of his charm, like he does alot of moe body language you might not expect of his type of chara.

hes #crazy and #madscientist and #edgy and #insaneasylum but also very silly and whimsical... kind of emblematic of the world of soul eater at large actually, this is also alot of the other characters appeal in this universe too (DEATH THE KID).

he's obsessive, hes empathetic, hes also sadistic, hes got a screw in his head, megane, fun with kids, perfect man. hes also got both an equal capacity for getting worse and better in him which can be fun to think about in either direction, and you've got characters that do influence him either way for that in the series. im also kind of remembering clicking the screw in his head is to help somewhat deal with his mental state actually, king of the disability aid...(?)

you can treat his character very seriously or lightheartedly, i think the writing in both versions maintains that balance well. It also makes everyone else who actually sticks around him somewhat deranged too (the fact he did surgery on spirit at school but spirit still interacts like pretty normally at work with him after meeting again. lmfao. THEY WENT DRINKING TOO) the fact he still calls spirit senpai also is so funny. its like 40% a dig at him but also 60% genuine. i hate gay people btw.

i like the thought that he was more stoic when he was younger but as he got older stopped trying to hide his eccentricities as much, and became more expressive lol. younger stein to me is a guy screaming in his head 247 but looking like 😐 while spirit stares at him trying to decipher what his eyelid twitching today means.

#chitter chatter #anonymous #this is longer than i thought it would be. apparently i have alot to say about soul eater

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museandwords · 2 months

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worship in decay ( bucky barnes x reader)

Warnings: female!reader, dubious consent, lots of alcohol consumption, mentions of casual sex, addiction mentions, the avoidance of genuine feelings, foul language, self-destructive behaviors, self-hatred?, self-esteem issues, parent issues, childhood trauma, bucky is no saint, but he tries to be a good boy, mentions of mental health, this will be expanded on per chapter.

Author’s note: this was affectionately nicknamed the hoe fic. i have been working on this for the better part of the past two (three?) months. im still adding, re-writing and editing a lot of the chapters. so far i have 7 chapters planned, though this may change as it's expanding by the second. weekly updates are planned, and to be perfectly honest this is just self-indulged and an ode to the sluts. please validate me, feedback is welcome. also sorry i've been gone for so long (i got married)

MINORS DNI! 18+ ONLY

PROLOGUE

You don’t know why you do it.

You suppose you could put the blame on your absent father, or the degradation and restrained hatred your mother held for you. You remember being that small child – begging for their love.

Now you find it in the hands of strangers.

Maybe you could blame it on the liquor that burns your throat and melts the ice off your bones and paints the world in some rose-coloured hue.

Or maybe (and this is the part that scares you most) you’re just truly a despicable human being, in which all of the ugly parts of your parents made you whole.

You try not to think too much about that. So you find comfort in the warmth of bodies, the hunger in kisses, the worship of strange men that bring you closer to God than any religion could.

At the end of the day; human beings are mammals at their core, it’s a dog eat dog world, and you’re starving.

‿︵‿︵ - - ‿︵‿︵

Waking up in the 21st century initially shook Bucky to his core.

American culture had fallen into a frenzy of degeneracy that could’ve made James Buchanan Barnes cry.

But he wasn’t James Buchanan Barnes anymore, he was something else.

And he was already desensitized to the dread of the world thanks to the recollection of his own mental house of horrors.

He just couldn’t believe there were more people like him.

People who are more desperate, self-serving, and shameless, he notices. He feels right at home with them.

That debauched urgency to chase a temporary high to replace the self-hatred even just for a little while was something he and these kinds of people shared. Addicts, the depraved, the lost, the broken.

Let them say Bucky Barnes was their king.

He's learned quickly that being brainwashed and kept on ice for the past 70 years really took a toll on his libido, go figure. He’s like a damn teenager full of raging hormones wanting to stick his dick in anything that moves. Now all he craves is the warmth of a human, living breathing body beneath him while their essence fills the holes in his soul.

What surprises him more is that they let him. They let his blood stained hands all over their silken soft skin, they let his rotted essence into their core, infecting them, tainting them, over and over, and they enjoy it.

His teeth graze their neck, and they should be scared that the Winter Solider could rip their throat out in a millisecond.

Instead, they coo and sigh and hold onto him tighter. It's addictive.

He loves them, every single one, for one reason or another.

This one makes pretty noises in his ear and smells like candy, that one has a beauty mark beneath her left eye and can make him laugh, those other ones look pretty in sundresses and make him breakfast in the morning. They all give him something, things he never knew he needed. To be adored, taken care of, loved.

#bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes x you #are we so back?#worship in decay series

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csuitebitches · 9 months

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I apologize for the long ask and if this question is a bit juvenile but objectively, how can one “gain” pretty privilege/gauge how they are viewed? I’ve done well in career pursuits for how early on I am ( I graduated in 2020) but started noticing that the invites to events/opportunities where one can really establish themselves not only professionally but socially, I was getting passed over by some higher up colleagues. In speaking to a female mentor who is related to my field and the same background as me (Black), she alluded that while my race may play a small factor in it, it’s more so my appearance that may be holding me back as the personality and poise is there. Some coworkers of mine who are brilliant and POC have similar credentials and positions as I and while we are all wonderful and hard working, they (who I feel are more beautiful and put together looks-wise) have discussed privately to me they have noticed a difference in treatment between us. While it’s not right, I am adult enough to know not to let things that can be fixed hinder the life I want. Your page is a wealth of information and I appreciate how encouraging you are!!

well. I’m going to be very blunt.

it’s all fun and games to say “oh fuck the beauty standards they’re terrible and they shouldn’t exist” yes, true, unfortunately they do exist and they play a bigger role than we imagine it to be.

the first thing you have to get right is your mindset.

you need to be strong enough to admit that you need changes in X, Y, Z area but not in A, B, C area. You also need to be a little loyal towards your racial identity (for the better or worse) because that’s what is going to make you stand out.

if you have a sensitive, overly emotional mindset and you get hurt very easily / become obsessive by nature, I highly recommend you to STOP reading now.

Understand what is considered pretty in your country and area. Even in one country, beauty standards can different from the north and south. Don’t exactly try to become attractive for the opposite sex but understand what they find attractive because these guys are your primary responders to your pretty privilege. Women will be kind on the surface and so it can be difficult to get constructive criticism from them.

Understand what YOU consider pretty. Who are the women who you think are crazy beautiful? What do they look like, dress like, how’s their hair and their make up, can you replicate any of it? Rule of thumb when it comes to hair and beauty - look at influencers / celebs who are of your racial background for the best fit.

there are always a few things that are universally considered “respectfully attractive” not “you wanna fuck me attractive”- semi modesty/ modesty outfits (my father always told me that when in doubt, go for a more conservative look), hygiene, well kept hair, clean nails and toe nails, soft skin, natural make up, natural hair colour, perfume, clothes that fit, skin care, a workout routine.

pretty privilege is not just the art of looking pretty. It’s also bringing in something of value on the table. Value = money / connections / knowledge/ humour / being the fun social person / whatever value the target group considers to be the most important for you to be relevant to them. Work on your soft skills. It’s better to look half baked but have solid soft skills than to look amazing and not know how to converse.

things that one normally notices when meeting someone new:

Skin - is it clear, is the make up overdone?

hair - is it messy or does it suit your face structure?

how you smell

teeth, when you talk - and dental hygiene

shoes - are they filthy?

shirt/ top - does it fit you well (always check that the seams on your shoulder and your actual shoulder line up), the colour of your clothes

body type, posture, how you carry yourself

start with incremental changes. Make a list of things you think you could improve on (this is not a list of “ugly” things, it’s an “improvement/ potential” list). Sort them according to ease of improvement (is this going to be expensive and difficult or affordable and easy?) and time (can this be done overnight or will it take some time).

Use point 1 and 2 only as launching pads. You do not have to look like Beyoncé, you’re simply understanding what her MUA and hair stylist does for her that could work for you. After a point, you have to ensure that YOUR identify sticks out and is still there, you’re not born to imitate someone else and also, it’s very obvious when someone is trying to be someone they’re not.

again. I repeat. If you’re going to get obsessive and make yourself sick over this it’s NOT WORTH IT. If you’re not mentally capable of making these changes, do not go through it.

#Q/a #pretty privilege

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traintomoon · 9 months

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BIRTHDAY REDEMPTION

summary: where tangerine finds himself at your door, with an apology and some other unintended confessions.

In the dimly lit room, Tangerine and Lemon meticulously scrubbed away any traces of their misdeeds. In a rather odd nature, the music blasting from the radio made the scene unserious. Tangerine sighed, holding the bloody mop in his hands. The floor looked decent now after hours of scrubbing. But the heaviness of metal sat solid in air.

Lemon looked up with a different look in his gaze. "Oi, it was y/n's birthday a few days back. We completely missed it."

Tangerine, usually unflappable, froze for a moment, his expression revealing a rare vulnerability. The look of your face flashed in his eyes, making the knot in his stomach tighter. "What? Why didn't you tell me earlier?"

Lemon, scrubbing harder as if trying to cleanse more than just the crime scene, continued cautiously. "Didn't think it was a big deal to you, mate. But I've seen the way you look at her. You might wanna make it right."

A wave of guilt washed over Tangerine's face. Without another word, he abandoned the job and dashed out, driven by a sudden urgency to make amends. The cold exterior that usually surrounded him melted away as he raced to your place, his embarrassment outweighing any lingering reluctance.

You hadn't thought much about your coworkers missing your birthday. You had eaten a cupcake after long works of stalking people suspected of smuggling drugs. You had thought of Tangerine and Lemon while blowing out the single candle too, but you won't accept it. Not even in your deepest emotions.

Just as you were preparing to get some sleep, there were loud knocks on your door. You were annoyed at the clamour. You tied a robe around your waist, cursing at the uninvited guest.

"I'm not fucking deaf. Holy shit."

The door creaked open, revealing Tangerine standing there, disheveled. He looked like he had abandoned a war to get there.

"Tangerine? What's... what's going on?"

His gaze briefly met yours, and for a moment, you saw vulnerability in his eyes—something you hadn't witnessed before. He shifted uncomfortably.

"What the fuck am I doing? I must have lost my fucking brain." Tangerine muttered under his breath.

"Tan, what's going on?"

The man in front of you took a deep breath, gathering his composure back. "Oi, listen here, I'm sorry. Forgot your bloody birthday. My bad, love."

Confusion mingled with amusement as you processed his unexpected admission. Tangerine, the enigmatic figure with a guarded demeanor, was standing on your doorstep, practically unraveling. The same person who didn't blink when you got shot in the leg last year.

"Are you sick? You came all the way here to say this? I appreciate it, Tan. But it's just a stupid birthday."

The air suddenly was filled with tension you didn't expect to feel.

"Look. I care about my apology because we work the kind of job that doesn't guarantee the security of life." If the lights were dim, you wouldn't have witnessed a small blooming colour cover Tangerine's cheeks.

"You could've texted."

"Texted? Blimey, love, I'm more of a face-to-face bloke, ain't I?" Tangerine refused to meet your eyes. You felt like he was hiding something more. That was until you saw some blood on the side of his forehead.

"I really hope this isn't yours." You held his hand, pulling him inside, closer to you. He felt a rush of heat reach his head when you pressed your thumb on his skin, wiping away the red.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Tangerine's voice came out low. You met his eyes, something hidden flashing in them. This handsome man looked even better close up.

"You tell me. Why are you acting weird? You like me Or something?" You surprised yourself at the bravery of your questions.

Tangerine blinked, refusing to put distance between you two. He drew slightly closer. "Why? Do I need to ask your parents' permission, love?"

"No." Your eyes moved down to his lips. Your hand now rested on his chest. The thumping inside his chest vibrated against your fingertips.

"Shall I bloody kiss you then? Because this is frustrating me."

Before you could process it, Tangerine, typically a man of few words, let his actions speak. In a sudden, daring move, he cupped your face, his lips meeting yours in a feathery touch. You kissed him back, making him melt in your wordless answer.

#tangerine bullet train #bullet train #aaron taylor johnson #lemon bullet train #fluff fanfic #writers on tumblr

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serve-corps · 3 months

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Joanne Harcourt x fem reader

Joanne helps you with your English homework and let's you know, he knows you're actually a girl, turns out he doesn't care about gender!🤷🏼‍♀️

also, here is an ASMR of Joanne that I made that this story is based on

youtube

Footsteps were heard along the cement path as the Scarlet Fox House dormitory for the third year’s door opened. The footsteps continued as the door shut behind it.

A casual hello and greeting were exchanged between the normal students and a blonde sweetheart, all soft smiles and lovey-dovey eyes directed at the very well-known prefect's drudge.

He really was Cole's replacement; he was just as pretty if not far more. However, he was dependable and kind, caring and sweet, he would never harm a soul. Must have gotten that gentle nature from his two older sisters I suppose.

Despite being a kind soul, he was also independent. Him going to Weston collage often reminded you of a baby bird leaving the nest for the first time, spreading its wings at Weston.

The blonde made his way through the years of said collage with only a few hiccups, but he was loved no less, he was friendly with all, well, minus Cole.

As he opens the doors to his room, entering with a soft click behind him, the doors shut. He dragged his feet to his bed which was relatively comfortable. It was far better than what he had as a first year. Damn, he can feel his back aching just thinking about it. It must have been a stone slab covered by a sheet; it was rock solid!

He sat down with an umf as he sighed, feeling the soft texture. for the next few seconds, he was cursing out the education system for their ways of punishment as he gained a Y for not being able to stop Kadar from infiltrating Sapphire Owl House's dormitory.

his thoughts came to a halt as something crossed his mind. something that had been bothering him for a while. He was worried. Worried about one of his dorm roommates.

He built quite the relationship with them as they always tried to help him in any way they could, whether it be with his drudge duties even though he tried to refuse, you always did small things for him that really helped him out.

'I'm worried...I haven't seen them recently...' He thought to himself, Joanne sat on his bed wondering if you were okay, he knew that the year group had an English examination due soon, he wasn't exactly sure how soon but he knew it was coming up. All that could be said was that nearly have the year group was stressed like the dickens.

He specifically recalled how you had a large pile of work on your desk, also remembering how you had missed lunchtime to continue with your work. You would get ill at this rate! he was paranoid about your health mentally and physically.

you've been awfully quiet around school, intentionally or not he still felt as though you were ostracizing yourself from not only the entirety of the school but him as well. he missed you in all fairness.

he knew if he said anything to one of the boys in the school, he would become an outcast again, he couldn't be known for having romantic feelings for another boy let alone one of his closest friends.

while he was off in his own world; thinking of how to comfort you, the door opened, revealing you who was dressed in the Weston college uniform, your hair kept up in a wig but the same colour as your natural hair (if you had parts dyed include them too), your face was very feminine but nobody here could talk, Cole had the face of a teenage girl while Harcourt himself looked like he came out of a freshly printed magazine cover for women to dress like men. you were never judged for that.

you walked in through the doors and closed them behind you, hearing the same click from before but your head snapped to the blonde you treasured ever so much as he called out to you.

"O-Oh! hi! I was just thinking about you!" he said with a soft smile that made your heart melt, you turned your head away to hide your face as you were struggling to compose yourself at his innocence. Joanne panicked at your negligence, feigning that you were upset by what he said,

"All good things! All good things! don't worry!" he said urgently as you turned back to face him, he felt a bit more at ease as you were no longer annoyed, he presumed at least.

Joanne went on to voice his thoughts to you as you once again tried to bury your own grave in work. god, you would be suffocating in it if it weren't for the fact you had draws to put them in instead.

"I've just been a bit...worried..." he turned his head to the side and scratched his cheek as he was bashful for admitting it.

"you've been almost distant with everyone! including me..." he sounded like a kicked puppy as he looked down.

you looked up from your work and softly gazed at the nervous boy as he was showing genuine concern for you.

"I'm sorry Harcourt- I- well it's just- *sigh* I don't really have the time physically and metaphorically..." you responded, your voice hoarse as you hadn't been talking much today. ironic because it was the English-speaking examination that was stressing you out the most.

He looked at you with heartfelt eyes as he heard your voice, this *was* damaging you physically. you needed help. this time, he wanted to help you.

"Do you want to tell me what's wrong? I'm willing to help you in any way I can! I just want to be of use to you (last name)….I really...don't like seeing you like this...." his voice was as gentle as a breeze as he offered to be your short-term therapist for the next few minutes.

you slammed the quill against the desk, breaking the feather as you hit the wooden table that you used quite often with your fist. the shock rattled through your hand, and it stung a little bit. you shook your hand as you looked at the desk in anger, almost blaming it.

sighing, you look at the kind soul who offered you help and explained,

"it's Master Goyal; the English teacher. he's ruthless with deadlines however he; pardon my language, can’t teach jack-shit! I've been stuck writing this damn speech that's worth a large part of my final grade and he won't give me any advice on how to word it! Christ all mighty! all I've done is be a good student and he hasn't helped at all! no! no! scratch that! he's set me mountains of homework!" you went on a rant about the teacher you loath. honestly? that's so fucking relatable.

"you see all this Joanne?! this mountain of damn paper?! you'd think that's all of the work I'd do in a year, right?! HA FUCK NO! he set it as god damn homework!!!" you shouted. you're really goddamn lucky he isn't a housemaster otherwise you'd be so fucked.

"that teacher is my goddamn thirteenth reason..." you mumbled to yourself and Joanne was silent throughout the whole rant, only for you to get an adorable little giggle in return, it stole your heart you had to admit.

"You just need some help with the homework? that's not an issue at all! I can help you with that!" he said with a snicker in his voice, but it died down to a sincere offer,

"I'm willing to help you in any way you need..."

you felt like a weight had been taken off of your shoulders as a smile made its way onto your face, staring at your savoir from this god-forsaken pit of paper.

the boy's attitude lightened up seeing you have a happier face, "I thought you seemed a bit depressed, thank god it was just the homework!"

he said with a gentle chuckle as you listed off a few of the other homework from other teachers who took pity on you, so they gave you less.

you asked him wearily if he was really sure if he wanted to give you a hand and his response was a giggle and a few kicks of his legs at the end of the bed.

"of course! justttt know that biology isn't my strongest subject...Hehe, so you might have to ask Kadar about that one...!"

you yourself chuckled at this as you know soma want the best person to go to about school work anyways, but you gave your dear old friend a little shock.

"Surprisingly, I'm very well-read in biology, whether it be anatomy, cells, or photosynthesis, I'm like a jack of all trades in that category!"

the boy sighed in relief, "Oh thank goodness, personally I excel in chemistry so I'll be able to help you in that aspect"

after that conversation with Joanne, he clapped his hands together and stood up, "Right! let me help you with this English speech!"

you sighed as you ruffled through some papers, muttering curses at Master Goyal once more only to result in the papers being mixed in with the rest of the homework. damn.

about two minutes later, you arrived victorious as you pulled out your speech, handing it to the blonde who was waiting patiently, secretly finding your struggle amusing as you looked like you wanted to throw hands with sheets of paper, damn his feelings were wrong.

he started reading over your speech, noticing your mannerisms and techniques. you were very well versed in the writing sector, you did ace your English literature after all, but the confidence portrayed through your words were appalling, he softened the commentary as much as he could.

"(your fake name), I think...you uhm... you have the right phrasing and techniques but you're lacking in the ahem...confidence department.

the listeners won't be engaged unless you sound like you’re the only right person, you need to have more confidence- uh"

you had your hand covering your mouth, finding it harder and harder to shut up your giggling the longer he spoke, snorts leaving your shanking form. he sighed in exasperation at this.

"Can you stop laughing? please? it's not that funny..." he said trying to be serious, however, failing miserably. he himself cracked a smile that he tried to shoo away because of your adorable laughter.

"but it is! do you remember what you were like before you became a drudge? you were as quiet as a mouse!" your snorts turned into full-on cackling as Joanne lost his serious act unintentionally.

"yes, yes I know, how ironic. Joanne Harcourt telling you to be more confidant...sooo funny..." his voice was shaky from trying not to laugh, only to break a little bit when you slapped your knee and wheezed out, "but it is though-"

"Okay! but I'm being serious! this could help you in the long run (Y/f/n)!"

your laughing at him continued as he Shakely explained the importance of confidence that you needed in your speech, you were taking the advice though, almost to heart as he dished out tips and tricks.

he ended up finishing his little lecture about voice and tone for you to still be softly giggling at him.

he let out a short sigh and crossed his arms, leaning back from you with a pouty face, "You're so mean!" but that charade ended rather quickly as you both grabbed hold of the other and both started laughing, these were moments you treasured with this boy.

he might not know you were a girl but you were still in love with him.

you both calmed down and you finished quite a large sum of the work together, at the least 75% of it was done, but time flew as you did the work together, it didn't even feel like work when you were with Joanne. I suppose that is a good thing, right?

suddenly, Joanne spoke up. " how about this, we go meet up with Prince Soma tomorrow and study some more English and chemistry because let's face it, if it was a chance of life or death with you answering a chemistry question? we're all as good as dead." both of you chuckled at this.

Joanne perked up as he came to a realization, "Wait, what's the time? you have a watch, don't you?"

you looked at your wrist and your eyes widened.

"Holy shit, it's almost 11 o'clock at night!" you whisper yelled.

"it's nearly 11?! crap! we have to get to bed now! I don't want a Y!"

several days had passed and now it was the night before your English-speaking exam, you felt confident you were going to rock this shit because you had your crush's help throughout it all.

you tossed and turned in your bed, only to hear Joanne softly whisper to you "Are you awake (Y/f/n)?"

the housemaster put us to bed about an hour ago, the routinely 5-minute checkups are now over as the housemaster has gone to bed. everyone in the room was asleep, apparently apart from you and Joanne.

"yeah, I am. what's up blondie?" you whispered back to him, turning to face him as he was led down in his bed which was next to yours.

"It’s just- I'm worried for you is all...do you think you'll be okay tomorrow, I did my best to help you..."

you sighed as it seemed Joanne Harcourt was more nervous about your exam than you were, honestly? that sounds just like the boy you fell in love with.

you dragged your feet over the side of the bed, heading straight for his as he was laying there shocked at what you were doing.

"w-wait...what are you? -"

you climbed into his bed as he led there still as a rock, trying to grasp the situation. you rested next to him, hoping to not only calm his nerves but to calm any of yours that could have been flying around out there somewhere for your exam.

"Why are you in my bed?... What on earth are you doing in my bed?..?" the boy whispered with a stutter. a blush painting his cheeks a light pink as his innocence overtook him.

despite his embarrassment, he pulled through, "You know I'm a prefects drudge right? it- it's improper for me to do this I-"

you hushed him and replied to the silent question why do you want this?

"I need the comfort, I don't want to burst into a panic attack as soon as the exam starts, right?" you say with an extremely calm voice, not a single hint of paranoia lacing it.

"This doesn't permit you to- if word got out then-"

"Then be quiet." you hushed him as he would wake the other three in the room.

he took a deep breath and accepted the inevitable. "t-this is fine..."

"But why me? you have a friend in Scarlet Fox House who'd be more than happy to do this, so why me- uh!"

you shut him up by wrapping your arms around his waist, pulling him into your chest. this leads to him being a blushing mess.

"p-please be considerate of the fact I know your confidential secret...that..." he gulped and looked down, not at your tits, just down.

"that you're not a male..."

your breathing stopped for a second. your thoughts going a million miles an hour as now the panic had kicked in, but only one thought stood out from the rest. 'will be okay with dating me now?'.

he chuckled at your shocked face as he debunked your attempts to hide it. "you thought you were slick, didn't you? it was obvious to me after a while...you don't bathe with us but you're always hygienic so you must do so separately...your body stature is very feminine.

you cut him off by nuzzling his chest, that really was an effective way to shut him up. "do I really provide that much comfort?.." he said in a hushed voice.

all you did was nod silently.

he sighed, "Fine... I'll sleep with you. just for tonight! I don't want you getting the wrong idea." he scolded in a motherly tone. you know damn well you'll be doing this from now on every night.

the looked down at your face as he looked into your eyes. your body reacted instinctively as you felt his breath against your face. you strained upwards, "What are you-! *gasp*" You cut him off quickly with a short peck to the lips, they felt so soft, you wanted another taste...but no, you need to make sure it's okay with him first.

red crawled up Joanne's neck all the way to the tips of his ears as he covered his mouth with the back of his hand, he was a stuttery mess.

he quietly cleared his throat to regain himself. As you stared at him lovingly, it made him all the more flustered.

"y-you could have at least told me your real name first-"

you stroked his cheek softly as you took a deep breath,

"O-Oh, I wasn't expecting you to actually-"

"(y/n)."

there was silence for a moment as if he was soaking in the same to match the face. his eyes now reflected your loving gaze.

"that's such a beautiful name. It suits you well..." he chuckled softly.

"Just make sure you ask next time you do that... I'd be more than happy to let you..."

both of your faces were slowly leaning closer, your eyes asking the question that you so desperately wanted to ask for you,

"you can do it as often as you like...mmf-!" his eyes widened once more but this time they shut to savor the moment, he tasted like honey and scones, but tea time was over five hours ago...must be his natural taste...

as you both pulled away this time, the kiss was dragged out longer, but both of your eyes slowly opened. you both appeared to have the air stolen from your lungs. you felt your heart melt as he said,

"you're cute, even dressed as a boy, you know that?" he rested his forehead against yours as you hummed in contentment, a small smile gracing your lips as you now felt tired and relieved.

"let's keep this between us, okay? I don't think Redmond should know about this...

I think it would be nice to make this a normal thing, like our own little homework club!" he said excitedly only for you to softly shush him and stroke your thumb against his cheek.

"two members only, I wonder why...." he said gently as your eyes fluttered shut, yet you still moved your head to kiss him once more, a short kiss that said shut up in a nice way. this led to a giggle from him.

"Maybe that's why..."

#Youtube #joanne harcourt #Joanne #Harcourt #x reader #black butler #kuroshitsuji #public school arc #scarlet fox house #fluff #kiss #joanne x reader #Joanne Harcourt x reader #tooth rotting fluff #asmr

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Text

A Timeline of Events in the Artemis Fowl Series

If anyone's interested, I did do an actual analysis for where I pulled some of these dates from. But because I cannot type succinctly to save my life, it's 5,000 words long, so that's below the cut. I also put the timeline there again, but in three separate images, so hopefully they load well enough to be fully legible if the above isn't.

A thousand thanks to @sadbitchapologist and @zahnie for their help and advice with this, despite neither of them having any more than the barest interest in the series and therefore having no clue what I was on about. Thanks also to @orangerosebush for fielding completely out-of-the-blue questions about the French school system, so I didn't have to attempt to navigate web search results to figure out what mandatory gym classes were like for the sole purpose of plotting Luc's birthday on here.

An Analysis of the Timelines in the Artemis Fowl Series

A Brief Introduction

The Artemis Fowl series is made up of eight books covering a range of years and events. I wanted to see how accurate the timelines present in the books were, as well as try and plot out some other details implied in the novels but not explicitly stated, to have a better understanding of the overall world-building. To that end, I went through the series and made the above timeline. I colour-coded it based on the relevance of the specific items to certain categories, namely Humans, Fairies, Villains, and the Series itself. This does mean that some things could have fit into multiple categories. For instance, you will see some items involving Opal categorized as Fairy-Specific (such as her college years, as those are fairly neutral to the main plot or her villainy), Villain-Specific (such as her setting up her emergency fund, as that is mostly related to her schemes as opposed to relevant to her existence as a fairy, or part of the main plot of the series), and Plot-Specific (such as her opening the Berserker Gate, the primary plot point for the final book).

Before we really delve into things though, we should establish the baseline assumptions I was working with. Firstly, I am only using the original series. I have not used anything written in The Fowl Twins trilogy, given that those books seem to ret-con a considerable amount of the original information, and that is far too many headaches to give myself. Any supplemental series information, such as the short stories found in The Artemis Fowl Files, or anything from interviews is also not included. The premise here is: using just the original books, what is the event timeline of the world? The second thing we need to establish is that I am using the North American releases of the novels. I did make notes on where each bit of information comes from, but there isn’t really a citation style for this kind of thing, so I’m not sure how relevant that is. The third assumption is that the first book takes place the year it was originally published. According to my copy, the original publication was 2001, with the first American paperback edition coming out in 2002, and the first mass market paperback being released in 2003. This means our starting point is in 2001.

For sake of clarity, this analysis will start with setting the dates of the books and continue on from there.

The Basics of The Books

With that out of the way, let’s talk about the first book, Artemis Fowl (AF). It is actually not until the very end of the book that we get a solid answer for when it takes place. It’s only in the last few pages of the novel that Angeline Fowl leaves her attic room after all the plot points are tied up and announces that it is Christmas Day. This might be cause for concern – Angeline had not previously been established as a particularly reliable narrator – but given that we are asked to believe that Holly’s ‘feel better’ mood booster worked, and that neither Butler nor Artemis balk at or question the pronouncement that is Christmas Day, we’ll accept that it’s true and move on. This means that, with Butler’s earlier announcement that he was stuck doing four months of stakeout, we can say with a fair amount of certainty that Artemis obtained and translated the Fairy Book in September 2001, and managed to capture a fairy in December of the same year.

Moving on to Artemis Fowl: The Arctic Incident (TAI), we are given a decent chunk of information, albeit spread out a bit. The first is the announcement that the ransom drop for Artemis Fowl I is to be held on the fourteenth. The fourteenth of what, you might ask? Well, we are told that Artemis is currently thirteen years old. Clearly, things are past September 1, 2002 (we know Artemis’s birthday is September 1 based on information in both the fifth and seventh books). We are also told that Luc Carrere has been trading with the goblins for six months, starting in July. That puts us in either December or January, but we can narrow it down further since Artemis gives us another helpful clue. He mentions they are not expecting to see the dawn while attempting to rescue his father in the Arctic. There are only a few latitudes on Earth where polar night (of any type) occurs, and at Murmansk, polar twilight occurs between December 10 – January 2. Combining all of this, we learn that TAI takes place December 14, 2002, give or take a few days to either side.

This can be corroborated by information in Book 3, Artemis Fowl: The Eternity Code (TEC). After Holly heals Artemis Senior, we are told that it takes over two months for him to wake up. Since we are specifically told two months, as opposed to two and a half or three, we can conclude that the events of TEC take place in March 2003. Mulch gives us some information that confirms this. He was living in LA “less than four months ago,” and since he was conscripted to help with the events of TAI in December, a March plotline fits the bill. We are given further confirmation as well: Spiro mentions that Artemis will be fourteen in six months. A specific date for Artemis & Co.’s attack on Spiro’s Needle can be pulled from the throw-away line that Pex and Chips are “burying” Mulch on the full moon. A quick web search tells us that the full moon in March of 2003 takes place on March 14, and the rest of the events in the novel take place roughly two days to either side of that.

In Artemis Fowl: The Opal Deception (TOD), the fourth book in the series, we are given several very clear indications of when the events take place. Firstly, Artemis is contemplating that at fourteen years and three months old, he is the youngest person to successfully obtain The Fairy Thief. Based on previously noted details that his birthday is in September, the events of TOD must take place in December of 2003. Additionally, we are told that things are the middle of winter and Opal has been in a coma for eleven months and counting as of the end of TAI, another December plot.

Artemis Fowl: The Lost Colony (TLC) requires the most math and interpretation so far to figure out when it takes place. We know Artemis is still fourteen, so the main events clearly happen sometime between January 2004 and September 2004. Beyond that, we are using a fair amount of context clues. Artemis and Butler have evidently been traveling for four months looking for demons, so we are dealing with events in at least May. But that still leaves us several summertime months to work with, so to establish a timeline here, we will need to look forward a bit. In the sixth book, Artemis Fowl: The Time Paradox (TTP), it’s noted that Artemis is not yet fifteen, and has, on multiple occasions, spent the full moon in the study. Ergo, he’s spent at least a few months back from Hybras. If he has been back for two months and not yet turned fifteen, he would have had to have returned by July at the latest, and since he returns almost three years later than he leaves, we are looking at him returning in either May or June. This would have him disappearing to Hybras – and by extension, dealing with the earlier events in the book – in June, July, or August. After his conversation with Minerva, he notes to Butler that they “are planning a June wedding,” which wouldn’t make sense to say if they were currently in the month of June. From all of this, we can extrapolate that the first three-quarters of TLC take place in late July or early August 2004, with the triumphant return of our intrepid heroes occurring in June 2007.

As previously stated, TTP mentions that Artemis is still not fifteen, but is nearly there. He has also been home again for at least two months. This would put the events of the sixth book in August 2007. At least, the events set in the current time period. TTP does bring back time travel, and with it some problems. We are told that Artemis and Holly jump back nearly eight years to Artemis being ten and trying to fund searches for his missing father. This would put the events of the past in early 2000. However, other details presented regarding Artemis Senior’s disappearance, which we will discuss later, make that impossible. Artemis also admits, in TEC, that he was eleven when his father disappeared, not ten. If we take a bit of creative license with our interpretations and base the time-jump to the past on other presented information as opposed to the dates given in TTP, we can say that Holly and Artemis instead return to early 2001. This lines up with further details, such as the sinking of the Fowl Star (as calculated a few paragraphs down in this analysis) occurring in December of 2000, and the textual confirmation in TTP that it’s barely two months past that sinking when Artemis brokers the deal(s) regarding the silky sifaka lemur. Since, at the end of the day, the time jump impacts very little in the grand scheme of things, and the year 2001 actually fits in better with other textual evidence and events, that’s what I’m going with for this timeline.

The seventh book, Artemis Fowl: The Atlantis Complex (TAC) gives us a very helpful base point! It takes place on Artemis’s fifteenth birthday, September 1. From our previous results on setting dates for book events, that would be September 1, 2007. The sections in which Butler and Juliet are fighting mesmerized wrestling fans and meeting up with Mulch are noted in the novel as happening “the day before,” which would fall on August 31, 2007.

Artemis Fowl: The Last Guardian (TLG), the eighth and final book in the series, creates some problems. If we assume that Artemis starts receiving treatment for his Atlantis Complex immediately after diagnosis in TAC¸ that would put him receiving treatment in September 2007. We are told he is certified as cured after six months. Yet we are also told that the rest of the events of the book take place in the week or so leading up to the Christmas holidays. Everything so far has said that the Artemis Fowl series follows the current calendar, in which case there is no way that six months can fit between September 1, 2007 and December 25, 2007. However, the only reference to Christmas is in two lines noting that the Fowl parents were planning on holidaying with their children on a foreign beach. If we simply say that six months have passed, and they are instead planning on spending the Irish school system’s spring holidays in the French Riviera, everything else lines up much better. So that’s what I’ve done. This would also put the resurrection of Artemis, after the events of the book and a further six months have passed, at roughly September of 2008. There is a pleasing symmetry to Artemis being born and then re-born in September, though if you want to get really technical and say the events of TLG take place during the 2008 March full moon as Opal claims (as noted in another web search as March 28), a six-month wait time for the clone to grow would put the resurrection in October. Still, there is something to be said for having a boy’s ghost haunting a clone of himself close to All Hallows. Since it’s the last plot point of the series, you can choose which you’d like; it doesn’t have to lead to anything else after it.

Let’s Talk Timelines: The Beginning of the Line to The End of The 19th Century

Now that we have our baseline book time periods established, we can get into the math used to determine some of the events in the timeline above. Several events are easy; we are given specific dates for them. Turnball Root meets Leonor in 1938, Juliet wins the Miss Sugar Beet Fair beauty contest in 1999. Other things are based on some basic math, such as Artemis claiming his parents got married fourteen years prior to AF¸ putting that event in 1987.

The majority of the items on the above timeline, however, do take some mathematics, extrapolation, and interpretation to plot out. To try and keep everything organized, we’ll start at the far left of the timeline, and work our way forwards, looking at events oldest-to-newest to explain why they are where they are on the graph. I won’t be getting too in-depth on everything in the graph, since I’m not sure how relevant the notes on the very minor side characters such as Carla Frazetti are, but I’ll at least try to touch on some of the more relevant points.

To start with, the Battle of Taillte was noted in the 2000’s as being ten thousand years ago, putting that at 8000 BCE. Similarly, the last dome breach at Atlantis was apparently eight thousand years ago in the 2000’s, so that would be 6000 BCE. Troll sideshows were legal in the early middle ages, which implies they were not legal after that. A quick web search says the early middle ages ended around 1000. The first crusades were in 1096-1099, and as those crusades are the start point of the Butler-Fowl working relationship, a point for noting that comes next on the graph.

From there, we get into more modern – relatively speaking – events. Briar Cudgeon and Julius Root are noted as attending the LEP Academy together and being raised in the same tunnel, as well as having about 600 years of history together. If one assumes “being raised in the same tunnel” is similar to the human equivalent of “growing up in the same neighbourhood,” we can assume the two were born roughly 600 years ago, in the 1400’s. Vinyaya is portrayed as being of a similar age to Root, so her birth can also be put in the same general era. We are also told that Fowl Manor was originally a castle built in the fifteenth century, that in the early 2000’s the theories of timeline corruption were first introduced over five centuries ago, and that cloning has been banned for over five hundred years, so those three events are also tossed into the 1400’s.

Julius Root is noted as doing his LEP basic training 500 years ago in Ireland, so that would have to be in the 1500’s. He would have attended the Academy before then, putting that in the mid-to-late 1400’s. As previously stated, he was in the Academy with Cudgeon. Opal also met Cudgeon in college, and competed with Foaly for science prizes there, so they were all in school at the same time.

Mulch now enters the picture. We aren’t ever given a specific age range for him, but we are told about his career. He has, apparently, spent three centuries in and out of prison after a couple centuries of success as a thief. This would make him at least five hundred years old. There is a brief mention that he tried the athletic route at college before becoming a thief, so he would have to be an adult at that point, putting his age at roughly 550 years during the events of the series.

We then enter a period filled in from one-off lines throughout the series, presumably added to give some depth to the world. Things about the wine cellar at Fowl Manor being a seventeenth century addition, Captain Eusebius Fowl and his crew dying in the eighteenth century, and Mulch first faking his own death over two hundred years ago.

Time Marches On: The 20th Century

There is nothing of much relevance to linger on between the 1550’s and the 20th century, so we’ll jump ahead to the 1900’s, when we have Holly Short’s birthday. She is in her eighties during TLC, and her father died “over twenty years ago” when she was “barely sixty” as of TAI. Based on that, she would have been in her early eighties in 2002, putting her birthday sometime in the 1920’s. What a doll.

A few more birthdays now appear, and we’ll ignore, for the most part, some of the irrelevant ones. I don’t think we are at all concerned with Gaspard Paradizo’s birthday, or Mikhael Vassikin. We are, however, rather more interested in Jon Spiro, Domovoi Butler, and Artemis Fowl I.

Jon Spiro enters the series in TEC, as a middle-aged American. A quick search on the Internet says that middle age is generally noted as being between the ages of 40 to 60. We are told that Spiro has worked in three main industries over the past two and a half decades. Additionally, we are told that law enforcement has been “trying to put [him] away for thirty years.” If we assume he entered the working world at twenty, spent five years developing his professional self, and then started going down a path of questionable legality to get the police after him, that would put him at fifty-five in 2003, and born in the late 1940’s.

It was a bit easier to determine Domovoi Butler’s age, and we can get more specific with his actual birthday. We are told that he is forty at the start of TEC, and he is still forty during TOD. From that, we can assume his birthday is not between March – December, which means it has to be between January – March. Now, we can just leave things there, but contextually, Butler says in late March 2003 that “a lot of people know [him] as a forty-year old man.” Since I doubt he’s the kind of person who introduces himself by announcing that his birthday was last week, we can assume that his birthday is not in March. Since about half the books in the series take place in December, and there is never any mention of Butler’s birthday coming up soon, we can likely assume it isn’t in January. We can therefore conclude Butler was born in February, 40 years before 2003, which puts his birth year in 1963.

We then have Artemis Fowl I. This one took the most extrapolation to determine. We know he has run an ethical empire for a few years as of 2007, which coincides with his return to his family after being kidnapped by the Mafia. He apparently ran a successful criminal empire for two decades before that, though, so in 2007 he has been working for at least 25 years. Based on the interactions he had with his own son, I’ve assumed he was also taught to take over the family business from a young age. If he started working at his age of majority at 18 (as possible in the 1980’s in Ireland, based on a web search), we can assume he was born in roughly the mid 60’s.

Billy Kong, born Jonah Lee, is one to touch on. He plays a large role in TLC, during which we are given possibly the most backstory of any villain in the series. He was evidently born in the early 1970’s, and was eight years old in the early 1980’s. Mathematically, that can only lend itself to so many birth years, so it’s easy enough to put his birthdate somewhere in 1973, and his brother’s death date in 1981.

While we’re here, let’s talk about the 1980’s. A lot of things happen in the 80’s, so we’ll be here for a few paragraphs. Butler would have graduated Madam Ko’s Academy in the early ‘80s, Artemis I would have started working in his family’s business and stolen some warrior mummies (of note, the theft is only noted as being in Artemis Sr.’s “gangster days,” but if you are a young, rich criminal, you’d likely commit a wild theft in your early years as opposed to your thirties, which is why this is put in here). Additionally, in the mid 1980’s, Holly graduates the LEP Academy and her mother dies, as noted in TTP when she is contemplating missing three years of her friends lives.

Butler would have started his five-year stint in Russia with an espionage unit in the mid-to-late 80’s, and become a big brother in 1985. Juliet is noted at being four years older than Artemis in AF in 2001, and he is twelve then, making her sixteen at the time. We can extrapolate the month from TEC, wherein she is apparently eighteen when she is called regarding her brother’s apparent death. At the time, we are told what gifts she received for her birthday, implying it was fairly recent. Additionally, Artemis was only thirteen at that time, which would make Juliet five years older than Artemis. If, however, we trust that acolytes at Madam Ko’s start their training on their tenth birthday and get one chance to graduate per year, it would make sense for that one chance to be on their birthday, or within a day or two to allow for as much training time as possible. Since Juliet was in the midst of this one graduation evaluation when she gets the phone call and joins the crew for the March heist at Spiro’s Needle, she’d have to be born in March. (We can also corroborate this with some details from AF: if AF takes place in mid-September, that would be just after Artemis’s birthday, which puts the 4-year age difference back into play.)

Spelltropy begins for the People in 1987, if it appeared 20 years ago from 2007. Artemis I and Angeline Fowl would get married in 1987. They would have their first child, Artemis Fowl II, in 1989, as calculated by Artemis being twelve during the initial siege of the Manor in December 2001. Artemis II’s grandfather was noted as having been dead for over ten years at that point, and it was mentioned in TEC that Angeline married her husband before he really took over the family business, so those events would likely happen when Artemis was but a baby in 1990.

The ‘90s are a period where a lot of things are happening, but few are particularly important. Spelltropy has a cure found, Minerva Paradizo is born, Juliet begins her bodyguard training and her brother refuses to let her shave her hair. These, and other events in the 90’s, are mostly calculated by math along the lines of “Event A happened X number of years ago,” but since the 90’s was mostly a time of worldbuilding events rather than plot events, we’ll just skim over the specific details.

‘You Are Here’: The 21st Century, and Where The Storytelling Begins

Welcome to the 2000’s! The kick-off point of not only the 2000’s, but also the entire series, is the sinking of the Fowl Star. We aren’t given a specific date for this, but we are given enough information to extrapolate the date. Specifically, in September 2001, in AF, we are told Fowl Sr. has been missing for almost a year. In TAI, in December, we are told he has been missing for almost two years. That does have the potential to have the ship go down in either December or January, so we need to use a bit more details from TAI to make a final determination. Mikhael Vassikin and Kamar were told to dump Fowl’s body in the Kola if he didn’t wake up in “another year,” so they’ve been looking after him for one at that point. Fowl Sr. wakes up two weeks before the deadline, and as noted earlier, the ransom drop for him takes place December 14, after he has been awake for perhaps a week. From that, we can tell that the deadline for “another year” was mid to late December, putting the initial sinking of the Fowl Star in late 2000.

The analysis gets a bit confusing at this point, because 2001 is when future Artemis and Holly join the party via time travel, as well as having their regular selves in the timestream. Essentially, we’ve established the timeline for the events of TTP above, so we know the whole lemur fiasco takes place in March 2001. Artemis wakes up at the end of that book thinking about fairies, which ties in rather neatly to him then dragging Butler across three continents for six false alarms (with an assumed approximate 3 weeks between each jaunt) before striking metaphorical gold in Ho Chi Minh City in September. During their time-traveling, Holly also gets a chance to talk to Root, who wonders why she isn’t in Hamburg, which was noted in AF as Holly’s first major failure as a Recon officer and was nearly preceding the events of AF. The time-traveling would also mean that Opal would have had to harvest her DNA for future diabolical plans before March 2001, when her younger self travels to the future. Since it takes up to two years to grow a clone to adulthood, and her clone has to be ready in September 2003, we are a few months off in the time requirements, but really, for a practice that’s been outlawed for 500 years, I can offer a bit of leeway.

We are now well and truly in the thick of the main events of the series. Most of this will be tied into the initial assessments we made way at the beginning of this essay, where we established when each book occurs. Because of this, we aren’t going to spend time on anything plot-related. However, a brief note on Turnball Root and Artemis’s Atlantis Complex is likely in order. Artemis was, as previously stated, dealing with his return from Hybras and the after-effects of stealing magic during July and August of 2007. His Atlantis Complex, and Turnball Root’s plan to escape the Deeps prison, are in full swing in September of that year. We have a brief note in TAC during the evacuation of Atlantis, that Turnball had, a month before, spied on Artemis and noted his Atlantis Complex developing. Therefore, Artemis’s Complex likely came into play in late July or early August 2007. This is close enough to Artemis’s magic theft to make sense for the deterioration of his mental health, and enough time for Butler to have started to notice something was wrong, as he did. We can therefore assume that Atlantis Complex, at least in the case of magic-stealing humans who have a propensity for time travel and getting involved in supremely complicated and improbable plots, develops relatively quickly.

This leaves just one major discussion point from the last few books: the age of Artemis’s twin brothers, Beckett and Myles. The twins are first introduced at the very end of TLC. They are written as being two during the events of TTP, three during the events of TAC, and four during the events of TLG. Regardless of the time-traveling shenanigans of their elder brother, it is impossible for the twins to age two years in the eight months between Artemis’s return from Hybras in June 2007 and the finale of the series in March of 2008, so we need to look at what makes sense.

Myles has already potty-trained himself, and done so at fourteen months, so they must be at least that old. Their other behaviours would make sense for them to be two in TTP. Diapers are still a part of their lives, and their language and vocabulary fit what a two-year-old would have, at least in Beckett’s case. Since Artemis was surprised by their existence, it doesn’t seem likely that Angeline would have known she was pregnant, or at least not have told Artemis yet, when he went to Limbo. Ergo, they can’t be any older than two, since (one would hope) Artemis would have noticed his mother’s pregnancy if the twins were any older.

Additionally, in TLG, we know Artemis gave his brother a birthday present, so he had to have been around during the twin’s birthday at least once. With this fact, the twins cannot be born between March – June, which just leaves the question of when are the twins born?

The most logical answer is February 2005. If Angeline was early on in her pregnancy, say six weeks (which is when most women start noticing symptoms), when Artemis disappeared in July 2004, she wouldn’t necessarily have told him yet. Then, if we assume that since most twin births occur around the 35-week mark, that would math out to having the twins be born in February of 2005. Fast forward, and they would turn one in February 2006, and two in February 2007, which puts them at the correct age for the events of TTP. [One could argue, of course, that a twin pregnancy in an older woman (unfortunately, there is nothing in the series to indicate Angeline’s age) and in a woman already dealing with significant stress could result in a very premature birth, thereby voiding any of this math and leaving the whole question of the twin’s birthday unanswered. However, since I’d rather not subject the Fowl parents to the strife and misery of having one son missing and presumed dead, and their younger children in the NICU with a low survival rate, I’m working with the assumption that the pregnancy was a healthy and normal one.]

The brief comment from Juliet in TAC about the twins being three can be passed off by them being a little over two-and-a-half and Juliet not being around as she is touring in Mexico. By the time TLG takes place, in March of 2008, the twins would have had their third birthday, allowing for Artemis to give Myles his chair as a birthday present, Beckett to be old enough to no longer need diapers, and the behaviours to act more like children than infants. While this doesn’t quite allow for the repeated textual confirmations in TLG that the twins are four, we’ll go with what mathematically makes sense.

That brings us to the end of the timeline! Not everything is touched on in the timeline, and not everything in the books is plotted (we are never given enough context to know Foaly’s or Opal’s birthdates, for instance). But the main events of the Artemis Fowl series are all analyzed, mathematically or logically or textually corroborated, and plotted out, for use or ignoring as personal preference dictates.

#artemis fowl #af timeline #you have no idea how irritated I am that there is nothing - NOTHING - in the series to give ANY context #on the ages for Angeline Fowl or Arno Blunt or Damon Kronski.#i can make GUESSES but they would be entirely based on my own bias and thoughts and vibes #which is INTENSELY irritating because i have basically EVERYONE ELSE #on the timeline SOMEWHERE #oh well. i think i have most of the events of the series on there?#if i missed something i'd love it if someone could point it out so i have a complete 'map'#oh though to be clear: i did very much do this for me!#this isn't meant to like...take away anyone's headcanons or ideas or whatever #if you wanna do something that directly contradicts the above - go for it!#i am just - as my cousin put it - 'that kind of fic writer' in which i will do insane amounts of research for the smallest of details #the one i wanted this for is honestly in a fic i haven't even started #and that is in fact several ticks down the Want To Write list #but that's neither here nor there!#i now have an outline of when things happen so i can do whatever i want with it :)

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adobe-outdesign · 7 days

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Pteri or grarrl review when you have the time? Whichever out of the two you most feel like doing

(I can do both in two parts, but for right now I'll do the Pteri.)

The Pteri is one of several bird Neopets, but surprisingly all of the other birds are specific, distinct species (penguin, owl, etc.), making the Pteri surprisingly unique for just being a normal songbird. Another thing that's unique is that the Pteri has a long non-feathered tail, almost like a Zafara; a very unique addition for a bird and one that gives it a lot more flavor than it would have otherwise.

In terms of design, the Pteri uses a simple three-color palette; base color on top, creamy accents on the underbelly and inside wing, and a complimentary shade of yellow for the beak and feet. The eyes also have these unique fire-y markings to them that accent the underbelly. My only real issue with the design is that the two head feathers don't share the same shape as any of the other feathers, and look both too long and too thin to be read as just fluff. Otherwise, it's a solid design.

The Pteri hasn't changed much through conversion, outside of gaining more distinct chest fluff and slightly longer, fuller wings. I like the overall rounded shape of the original a bit more, but I also really like the 3/4s few the converted is in; having it be front-facing in the older artwork makes the details of the design harder to see. (Also, a moment of appreciation that they just subtly cupped the converted Pteri's wing instead of trying to give it hands or something. Hissi, take notes.)

Favorite Colours:

Faerie: The Faerie Pteri is simply beautiful, and everyone knows it. Instead of having butterfly wings tacked onto it, it instead runs with the bird idea by adding extra feathers to the tail, kind of like a mini peacock, and also adding more to the head and wings. It uses a gorgeous yellow as its primary color and accents it with white, orange, red, and purple, with the colors radiating outward in layers. The design also compliments the natural eye markings with additional markings around the entire eye as well as on the head and tail, and adds some lovely eye spots on the tail as well.

The converted version technically follows the same design as the original, minus the additional eye markings, but honestly the UC/styled pose shows off the markings better and has more flow to boot, making it far superior by default.

Darigan: Unlike Faerie, the converted Darigan Pteri doesn't look that great. The design is technically accurate to the original, but trying to make those features work on the default body shape just isn't happening, and a lot of detail got lost in the shading and highlights in the process.

However, the UC/styled version is really cool. It's one of the few tan Darigan pets that I don't wish were purple, with black accents for the finest feathers and red eyes for contrast. The long feathers and more raptor-like body shape really work well, and the talons on the hind feet are accented by the beak and various spikes. I also appreciate the subtle spotting.

Valentine: Not as fancy as the other two, but the Valentine's Pteri is quite nice; a mostly pink body with a subtle white gradient that transitions into heart markings. Like most good Valentine pets, it subtly integrates hearts into areas like the chest feathers, head feathers, and eye markings, and doesn't feel overly cluttered. I do think that the tail should've also been a heart, and something about the face reads as faintly sunburned to me, but it's still a nice color overall.

BONUS: The mutant Pteri is one of those mutants that's just a little too busy to be one of my all-time favs, but I do like it a lot. The cockatrice-esq body shape is super distinct and looks appropriately mutant-ish, and the teal, yellow, and red palette works great; not to mention the actual art quality is really good as well, with some lovely shading and linework. I do feel like the details should've been trimmed back—lose the long arm fingers, lose the red things on the tail (maybe just keep the final cream segment red instead), drop the patterning, maybe even make the wing feathers cream to break up the design a bit. Still, pretty good overall.

#the neopets servers aren't loading any images right now hopefully everything shows up right #neopets #neotag #pteri #neopet reviews

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strawberryfragola · 2 years

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a guiding hand

mentor!al-haitham x reader

warnings: MDNI, explicitly afab!reader, power imbalance, sexual fantasy, oral, praise kink, choking

al-haitham loves watching his cute little student squirm. you��re so desperate to make him proud, you listen to his every instruction like a sermon, eyes wide and attentive as you bow your head to him. you’re so adorable, he can’t help but tease.

he makes his teachings vague and abstract on purpose to watch your brow furrow. he can almost see the cogs turning in your silly little head as you try to make him happy. al-haitham makes you rewrite your paper again and again - you don’t see him gripping his throbbing cock under the table, embarrassingly turned on by the flushed colour of your cheeks as you redden from humiliation at another failed attempt.

the dark circles under your eyes are more pronounced the next time you visit him, you’ve clearly stayed up all night to work on it this time. as you hand him what feels like your thousandth draft, you shuffle on the spot, hands twisted in the hem of your blouse, eyes on the floor. al-haitham doesn’t miss your pink cheeks and the beginning of frustrated tears in your eyes. he also doesn’t miss the way your thighs press together slightly as he leans back leisurely in his chair to read.

your writing is improving. in all honesty, the last few drafts had been more than sufficient. he just couldn’t help but break you down a little bit more. as he reads, he narrowly his eyes and runs a finger absentmindedly along his thigh. you’re full on squirming now, seemingly unable to stand still as the anticipation of his criticism overwhelms you.

maybe al-haitham should be kind. maybe he should tell you it’s perfect, that he is proud of you. oh, he’d love to see how flustered you would get when he finally praised you. he would reward you of course, clever girls like you deserve something special. perhaps he would finally spread your soft thighs on his desk, keep you still with his hand around your pretty neck while he devoured your dripping cunt. you’d sing ever so sweetly for him if he sucked on your clit, but he couldn’t have that at all. you were his little trainee, he wouldn’t share your whines with any of the other scum at the akademiya. he would make sure you were all his, even if it meant extinguishing your moans by gripping your throat so hard your air was cut off. maybe he’d leave a harsh ring of purple fingerprints along the column of your throat, the most beautiful necklace a silly little slut like you could ever deserve.

when he lowers your paper at last, you finally meet his eyes. there’s something calculating in his gaze, as though he studying you. your breath catches in your throat as he stares, impassive. seconds pass in silence. as he stands to move nearer, you freeze, unable to run, unable to do anything but watch nervously as he approaches you. too exposed, too vulnerable, he stalks nearer until his mouth brushes the shell of your ear. all you can hear is your own thumping heart, your shallow breathing. the feeling of his warm breath on your ear makes you shiver and you feel his lips curl upwards as your body quivers against his own solid one.

“not bad,” he murmurs, barely more than a whisper. “but i think we can do a little bit better, don’t you? it seems i still have so much more to teach you.”

#genshin impact #genshin imagines #genshin x reader #genshin impact posting #genshin impact smut #al haitham smut #al haitham x reader #al haitham genshin

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mistinajar · 2 months

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Ask and you shall receive!!

This comment is about a Coraline au, focused around Emil. Sorry if this summary is a bit clunky.

(Human au). Lukas and Mathias move into a new house, bringing Emil, who is about 16-17, with them.

Berwald and Timo are neighbours of Emil now, being close family that Lukas and Mathias moved to be closer to. The rest of Emil’s neighbours are pretty eccentric.

Emil feels isolated and alone in his new house, so to get away from it all he spends his time exploring through the natural landscape, however on a rainy day, when being ignored by Lukas and Mathias, who were working, Emil sets off to explore a room when he discovers the hidden door.

Upon asking Lukas to open the door for him, Emil discovers that the door opens onto a solid brick wall.

One of Emil’s neighbours (not sure who yet- maybe Belarus or England?) gives Emil a spiritual prediction of some kind, claiming he’s in grave danger. Emil thinks no more of this prediction and wakes up the next day to find that Lukas has gone grocery shopping.

Bored and lonely once again, he decides to open the door to the brick wall once again. To his surprise, he finds that the door no longer opens onto a brick wall. It leads to a mysterious corridor instead.

Emil goes down the corridor and ends up in a parallel universe that looks just like the one he left behind. The only difference is that things seemed somewhat better in this universe than his own.

His bedroom is not dreary with a minimalist look but instead painted in captivatingly colours with trinkets and items of nostalgia galore.

Emil sees his alternate family in the parallel universe consisting of the Other Lukas and the Other Mathias (idk if I should come up with better names). They both have buttons for eyes.

Emil discovers that puffins can talk in this universe and then he’s greeted by alternate versions of his neighbours. After a while, they seem much more sinister than in real life.

Emil is soon creeped out by this world, and decides to return to his own.

Other things to note:

The ghost children -> micronations?

Big themes -> isolation/loneliness (when isn’t it when it’s about aph iceland lmao), family, escapism, choice, imagination, and identity

@moody-skyz :]

#hetalia #hws iceland #mistjar talks

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rea-grimm · 1 month

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My dragon warrior 2

You haven't been to your grandmother's in a good five years. At first, you avoided the place, and then, later, you weren't attracted to it anymore. Sometimes you'd go there just to wish her a happy birthday or Christmas, but those were just a few hours.

This time you were celebrating, and since it was your anniversary, Grandma wanted to give you a special present. You were kind of wondering what it would be.

You were sitting in the living room and you received a small box from your grandmother. You immediately thought it was probably some kind of jewellery.

"Then open it," your grandmother urged you. Inside the box was a bracelet made of black leather with a stone of your favourite colour in the centre. You took it in your hand and looked it over before giving your grandmother another hug as a thank you.

"Try it on. I want to see how it fits," she urged you again, giving you the impression that she was more eager than you were. You obeyed her anyway and put the bracelet on your arm. It fits you like a glove.

You held out your hand, admiring how pretty it was as the stone glowed familiarly. Immediately the joy left you as the light enveloped you, and in the confusion, you didn't even notice your grandmother smiling contentedly.

It was a feeling of déjà-vu as you floated through space, having no idea where you were. Could you be travelling to Japan again? It's hard to say.

When the light finally faded, you finally felt solid ground beneath your feet. Everything around you was spinning and somehow you managed to land standing up. You didn't know why you decided to take a step forward, but you didn't and ended up on the ground instead. You lay there like a corpse, watching the sky slowly spin around.

When your head finally stopped spinning, you sat up and looked at your bracelet. The stone was snow white. As if it had never been coloured. That didn't help, and you cursed your grandmother for at least not warning you.

But now you looked around. You felt like you were sitting in the ruins of a building. You could still see the walls in places, and there were lockers and such that were already covered in grass and moss.

You rose to your feet, wondering which way to go. But it looked the same in all directions, so you headed in a random direction. Maybe it would lead you to civilization. It was still better than waiting to see if something would eat you.

You walked through the forest until you came to a beaten path. You decided to follow it. The path was bumpy and twisty, but you didn't mind. The weather was warm, and the surrounding trees gave you nice shade. Under different circumstances, it would have been a pleasant walk.

You were slowly approaching the edge of the woods when you could see the meadow when you paused. You felt as if something giant had flown over your head, and your fear was confirmed by a flock of birds taking flight.

You stopped and clung to a tree and waited. You almost fell over in shock when you saw what was circling over your head. It was a giant Chinese dragon with blue scales. It flew low over the meadow and you thought it saw you among all the trees. You immediately took off into the woods, as far away from the dragon as possible. What was a dragon doing here anyway? They were only in fairy tales, weren't they?

You ran, and you had a dozen questions running through your head. One of them was if you could even escape and what you'd do when he caught you. The dragon chased you over the treetops until the forest thinned and he could swoop down and zigzag through the trees.

Slowly but surely, you approached the other end of the forest and this time you couldn't turn back as you had the dragon at your heels. You ran out into the meadow, knowing that out in the open, it would catch you like anything. You ran on, trying to figure out something useful you knew about dragons.

"If you ever come across a dragon, it's important to show it respect. It's best to bow to it," a voice with a Japanese accent said in your head, and you remembered your first visit to another world.

You had no idea if you were in the same or a completely different world, or what the rules were here. But you didn't have many options. Either you keep running and he catches you, or you take a chance and maybe survive. You chose the latter.

With a roar, the dragon burst out of the forest, and as you expected, he was faster here, and nothing was slowing him down. It took you a long time to convince yourself that this was better than running away, and finally, you stopped and turned to the dragon, heart pounding.

You clenched your hands into fists, and when he was only a few dozen feet away, you bowed. At a good, almost right angle. You felt that a slight bow wouldn't be enough and that the more you bowed the better. You didn't want to fall straight to your knees and this seemed perfect. You waited with bated breath to see what would happen next.

With a thud, the dragon landed a few feet away from you, looking you over. You felt his gaze on you, wondering why you didn't start shivering.

Nothing happened for a long time, and you hesitated to get up anymore. Instead, you weakly raised your head to see him. You almost couldn't believe your own eyes, as the dragon lowered his head to the ground as well, and it looked like he was bowing to you as well.

As you bowed, you felt you couldn't take it much longer and slowly stood up. The dragon raised his head in the same way and you both looked at each other. You had to admit that he had beautiful blue scales, blue-gold horns, almost black fur, and golden eyes.

You decided to try your luck some more and looked around. Behind you, you notice a beaten path. It could lead you to civilization. You looked again at the dragon, who was looking at you with stern eyes.

"Um, I better get going," you said nervously, not knowing if he even understood you. The dragon didn't react in any way, so you decided to turn around and head down the path away. After a few steps, you looked over your shoulder, but the dragon was still there and never took his eyes off you for a minute. You decided to ignore him and keep walking.

You walked up a small hill and noticed that there was a town in the distance ahead of you. As if a stone had been dropped from your heart, you rejoiced. You had finally found civilization. As you looked around, you noticed that the dragon was still circling you. He was keeping his distance, but he was still watching you.

You rested for a moment before you set off with renewed energy.

After a few hours, you finally reached the city. Already on the way as you approached, you began to see more and more people. With civilization at your fingertips, you felt much safer and more confident. You looked up at the sky several times, but there was no sign of the dragon. Had he given up? You just shrugged it off and moved on.

You wondered how you were going to take care of yourself now. You were in a strange world with no money and nothing of use. Surely you could have been worse off. You could have been slaughtered by a dragon over there, for example.

You walked the streets of downtown and took in your surroundings. It reminded you so much of your world. Even when you overheard people talking, you were calm because you understood them.

In addition, there was some sort of market going on in the square and there were stalls scattered everywhere with food, drink and all sorts of things. You looked at the stalls with interest and stopped at one with food. You watched a chicken being grilled as you realized how hungry you were.

You couldn't even count how long you'd been on the road. You would have liked to buy something from the stand, but you didn't have a penny on you. Trying to steal something? You could try, but you weren't so sure.

Instead, you went to the next stall. Here too, they offered delicious-looking food, and the vendor was nice enough to offer you a bite to try. You happily accepted. You took a bite and felt like you had tasted heaven. It was so good, you could have eaten a lot more.

You were about to eat the rest when someone grabbed you by the arm and started pulling you away. The rest of the bite fell to the floor. But you didn't have a chance to mourn it and instead turned to the scoundrel who was pulling you away. You denied yourself and wanted to wriggle out of his grasp, but it was like fighting a mountain. His grip was awfully strong and you felt like you'd dislocate your arm before you could get away.

The man was wearing a short black kimono, one sleeve of which he had not worn, which was flowing loosely behind him, and perhaps the most noticeable feature on him was the blue dragon tattoo that stretched down his entire left arm to his chest. His hair was tied up in a ponytail with a ribbon and he had a neat beard. None of that interested you at the moment, though. Thoughts ran through your head that he was going to sell you on the black market for human flesh or drag you off somewhere and rape you.

"Help!" you screamed at the top of your lungs. "Help! Pervert!" You continued, struggling to get out of his steely grip. As you did so, you noticed people started turning on you and forming a small crowd around you.

"Shut up!" He growled at you, as he didn't like the attention you were attracting either.

"No way!" You snapped and somehow managed to spin around so that you were now facing him directly. He loosened his grip for a slight moment as other people began to hoot at him to let you go. You took advantage of this and kicked him in the crotch as hard as you could. He immediately let go of you and fell to the floor, writhing in pain. You weren't going to linger there a second longer and ran towards him. You didn't even look back.

Some were still yelling at him but most were gathered around you, trying to comfort you. They even offered you food and drink from nearby stalls. You gladly accepted and thanked them all.

#my dragon warrior #hanzo shimada #hanzo x reader #overwatch #overwatch x reader #dragon hanzo #soulmates

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mummer · 2 years

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hellooooooo smart person!!! i have two asoiaf questions to ask you. so i was reading adwd, the chapter with ellaria sand making her big speech (can i take the skull to bed with me, to give me comfort in the night?) which was literally one of the best monologues ever. but i think it frames justice in a bitter, bloodthirsty manner. the martells are completely understandably pissed off by the lannisters, is george saying in this instance, even though vengeance is good (emotionally), it’ll screw everyone over? and does this apply to the starks/boltons too? we have so many good speeches on war and justice: broken man, this one, bathe in bolton blood, the mummer’s farce is almost over, etc. but they do conflict. is that the point? justice is better not pursued? or needs to be thought out?

ALSO. your vibe is that you’re a theon enjoyer. so i was wondering where his story is. it’s about identity, yes? but who is he? he’s not a greyjoy, i don’t think, he seems so disconnected from that violent culture, but he’s no stark. i think he wants a family, but the north will never accept him as a stark. so what’s theon’s purpose? i’m so sorry for talking so much but i always love your answers

ok ok ok. anon ily. i might answer the theon one in a separate post if i have time; im gonna try to be as brief as possible but i am gonna put this under a readmore because you touched on uhhh probably the central question of the whole series lol! in fact you could probably write a phd thesis about violence and justice in asoiaf lol, but lets see if i can boil it down quickly maybe not clickbait???? (i lied, this got egregiously long)

ok ok ok some disclaimers up front. I personally am probably a bigger pacifist than most people lol, so this may colour my take somewhat. secondly spoilers but my answer is that i dont think the series actually has a solid answer to the question of retribution/vengeance. my favourite kinds of art are pieces that ask questions that can't be answered. and: is violence ever acceptable? can it be used as a means to a good/just end? <- is like, a hugely unsettled matter in the entire human experience. this is a question we all ask ourselves at some point. it's even more complicated and tangled in real life! is the death penalty ever okay? how can we wage just wars? how do we protest subversively? can people be rehabilitated? even: can we change? that's what politics are all about! the q of violence is something i am constantly thinking about and am still unsure of my answers! most people are!

what asoiaf does so well is pick at the idea of violence in about a hundred different ways and though a hundred different lenses. not all violences are equal! of course not! it is very clear about this, as well as that said violence is not always physical, is most often institutional. and justice.... well justice is completely incoherent in this world!!! the first chapter opens with the protagonist executing a man we as readers KNOW did nothing morally wrong! the thing with asoiaf is that there is always an added nuance to challenge you when you think you've made up your mind. someone shows a glimmer of humanity, or else descends into unexpected cruelty, or else complicates the narrative. there is always a 'but'.

for example: take robb's war for ned. he is trying to avenge his father, save his sister. okay, that's noble. that's just. you want to root for that. BUT: their warpath endangers hundreds of thousands of smallfolk, not to mention the thousands of innocents in their armies forced to fight one another and die for the sake of one man. how could that be worth it? BUT: tywin's army was desolating the riverlands anyway, so wouldnt it be a net good to defeat them? BUT: protecting smallfolk was never their priority; their 'justice' is only for the highborn; politically, an independent north would probably not be any better or worse for the peasantry. a tree of hanging women who lay with lions. "the north remembers", when it's first used on page, is not a joyous rally; it's robb reflecting bitterly that harrion karstark cannot openly forgive him for killing rickard, or risk losing face. rickard, who was killed for killing lannisters, because the lannisters killed his sons-- because robb waged war, because the lannisters killed ned! a poisoned cycle that can't end, an ideology defined by war, remembrance and loyalty as its own sort of sickness.

the thing about violence as justice in asoiaf is that it is never portrayed as revelatory. it's not... like... cool lol. did tywin deserve to die? idk, maybe. but this does not lift a weight off tyrion's shoulders. it doesn't feel like he won. this is something all characters must bear and grapple with. arya in particular is rich with this and that could be its own essay ofc. at its simplest, though, we have sandor. he killed her friend. a child. do child-murderers deserve to die? a lot of people in the world would say yes. but when he is at her mercy, when he is literally begging for her to kill him, she can't. it's too much. when dany orders the disembowlment of the slavers, she questions the choice internally. does torture have utility, here? what is it worth? ("But later, when she passed the men dying on the posts, when she heard their moans and smelled their bowels and blood... Dany put the glass aside, frowning. It was just. It was. I did it for the children.") again, i dont think the narrative has a straight or easy answer, which is why she's asking at all! if these answers were easy there wouldnt be a book. or things like jon's babyswap, which i consider its own kind of violence— but it is born from an unflinching desire to avoid worse violence. so... can it be just, then? theon murders the miller's boys. little kids. does he deserve to be punished? yeah, right? but then we are confronted with reek, and the empathy in the reader flinches, says: nooooo not like that!!!! and then feels bad for ever thinking it! so if he can change, did he ever deserve to die? when joffrey dies-- joffrey!!!-- there is very little catharsis to be found. ("He has Jaime's eyes. Only he had never seen Jaime look so scared. The boy's only thirteen.") the prose focuses on his purple face, his futile desperation to breathe. the way he looks like a child, because he is.

and then there are all the logistical, logical ends that need to be dealt with when seeking retribution. you got back at someone: great. now their family or allies or loved ones will get back at you, and on and on it will go forever until no one remembers the original injustice (see: the brackens and the blackwoods). now there is a power vacuum, or a counterrevolution, now the crops have burned and everyone is starving, now there are orphans. so... was it worth it? this is generally never the intent, but none of this can be sidestepped, either. a large point: no matter how justified in war you may feel, these consequences must still be borne. whether they are worth it in the end is your decision to make.

so we come to ellaria, with no clearer answer than what we started with. and i agree, it's one of my favourite quotes too. the endless question of: what do we do with what has been done to us? the violence has already been done, there is no way to bring someone back, there is no retribution. the victims are dead and so is their killer. and yet it is a hollow justice, because nothing has changed. women like elia are still bartered as political pawns and discarded. again, there is no coherent justice in westeros. it is only by chance that gregor died anyway. the systems of power are still functioning, and the aberration of that is felt. the sand snakes are grieving, but they are grieving the only way they know how. oberyn walked past obara's weeping mother when she picked up a spear. the only language in westeros is violence, the only power in blood. well, it's better than being powerless, right? .....right?

there is no good option. doran picks a side, having agonized over it for decades. this was not easy for him! the martells are understandably pissed off by the lannisters— of course— but... who is left to seek justice from? tywin is dead. robert is dead. aerys and rhaegar are dead. gregor is dead. amory lorch is dead. they could war against/kill cersei... i guess. jaime, maybe? myrcella? tommen? great, what would be the point? will their deaths feel good, emotionally, to the martells? or will they just feel hollow, like so many scenes of retribution in the series?

so i might favour ellaria's vision-- peace and submission, anything just to survive, to avoid hurting people. but this has its own very very obvious problems! pacifism is not a get out of jail free card lmao! "war will come, whether we wish it or not," obara says. it's highly possible this move would be seen as a sign of "weakness", and would only invite worse violences from the ruling power. again— the misery of this world is systemic, not individual. that's what feudalism is. that's what power is. it requires violence to maintain. but violence is also almost always required to challenge or protest it. so, ok. fuck. fuck! how can a world like this be borne? and how can we change it?

god i wish i knew!!!!!! — george rr. martin, 2011

#asoiaf #this is nowhere even close to my full thoughts on this. at all. but a little taste a little glimmer #'a little glimmer' i say about a 1500 word post #i spent so long on this im not gonna be able to get enough sleep oops. Oh well

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