#i just wish my family was normal | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

sleep-nurse · 1 year ago

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blame my inactivity to my shitty ass ''parents''

#vent #all i did today was cry #and i didnt even go to bed i just had to lay on my desk #on my chair all day and now everything fucking huirts to shit #i just wish my family was normal #i wish i dnd't have to hear about how much i fucking suck everyday #all for no reason too #i wish i was loved by anyone #if i disappear one day don't be surprised #i didnt even eat or drink anything all day #its 8 pm now

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kari-go · 2 months ago

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...buttefly!Chloe?

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fizpup · 1 year ago

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valentine, you're a horse ❤️

#my little pony #mlp g3 #wish-I-may #wish-I-might #ok so. I'm gonna ramble for a sec #normally when I post on valentine's day I complain in the tags about being single. but I won't this year!#I've recently realized I'm definitely somewhere on the aromantic spectrum. and that I'm perfectly content without a partner #in the past I've described myself as 'emotionally unavailable' or having 'commitment issues' but neither of those things were ever true #I'm a very loving and loyal person!#I've always been extremely affectionate with friends and family but unable to have the same level of love for potential partners #unsure if I'm just demisexual/demiromantic or actually aroace but I'm definitely not the default settings type of gay lol #I'm a big fan of romance and sex in fiction! but irl? 😅😬 idk about that fam! idk!#hypothetically I would like to have a gf one day and maybe fall in love but now I understand why that may not happen #or atleast is gonna take a while. and that's fine :)#tldr; if your top song on spotify last year was Cupid by Fifty Fifty it's time to do some soul searching lol #happy valentine's day!! 💕

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napping-sapphic · 26 days ago

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can tell the pain induced lack of sleep is getting to me because i just got emotional over the somber feeling of a heating pad losing its warmth

#like the sensation is sad idk how else to say it #also side note that ive been going to doctors and being medicated for this pain since i was a teenager #and like there are things i struggle to do or avoid because of it #and like times it wakes me up and such etc etc #but it was only after my last doctors appointment that it sort of occurred to me and i had to check with my mom #like straight had to ask ‘wait do I have chronic pain??’#she looked at me like i was crazy💀💀#the answer is apparently yes btw #which - rude no one even told me😒#like how was i supposed to know????#i thought it was like idk bad normal pain #but my family keeps trying to tell me ‘normal pain’ isn’t a thing #which like??? surely not?? everyone gets aches and pain and. the like??#really been coming to some health revelations this year #and heating pads are with me through it all😌❤️#just wish it didn’t feel like they were passing away in my arms any time they shut off💔#sorry for the rambles againnnn #sleeps been weird lately and i just get so bored waiting on it😪

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a-gaime · 9 months ago

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Chainsaw man oc who's just Denjis therapist and is a responsible and trustworthy adult who doesn't take advantage of him or his issues and trauma

#chainsaw man #not even joking #i need this #ripping my flesh off and clawing at my bones none of you get him like i do #i can fix him (be a decent person to him and punch katana man)#the oc will adopt denji and nayuta and they'll all live in a apartment and finally be happy and meowy will be there and im NOT CRAZY!!!!!#chapter 166 is actually killing me fujimoto PLEASE for the sake of the world as we know it and as we wish it to be let him be happy #get these freaks away from him he doesn't need them in his life its just him and asa amd they're normal and they go to the zoo and aquarium #and they have fun and Denji comes home to a cooked meal and a family who cam actually support him both financially and emotionally #this cannot be to much to ask for #csm denji #csm spoilers #ig #only in the tags #denji hayakawa #what do i have to do for him to be happy fujimoto

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nikothebookdragon · 2 months ago

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to anyone not feeling the "christmas spirit" or any kind of cheer in fact, I'm sending you much love. we may be strangers behind screens but in spirit we are holding hands and getting through this together <3

#I normally adore christmas and everything about it (well. not everything. but the nice parts and the so-called spirit)#but I just want it to be over #just wanna get away from here and never come back #and see all my friends and hug them tight #and maybe even kiss the one who stole my heart #(I'm allowed a little indulgent fantasy)#(it's copium OKAY)#I normally would never wish for time to pass quickly and I swear I'm trying to see the positives #but I just want to fall asleep and wake up several weeks in the future #this is probably the most depressing christmas eve I've ever had #and it's a low bar #one day I'll have the perfect christmas though #surrounded by my chosen family and all the people I love #laughing and playing games and chaotically cooking #and all this will seem like a bad dream from another life #we'll hold each other close and fill our ragged cracks with love #and it'll be even better than in the movies #I'm promising it to myself #cosmo rambles

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destielgaysex · 9 days ago

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season 5 of supernatural makes me so fucking upset and crazy and i think thats why i have never rewatched it until now. i am so fucking crazy and also upset. i cant do this

#cas isnt even THAT self laothing yet #i cant look at himm #i can tlook at him all i can think is ohhh my god he doesnt even hate himself so muhc yet #oh godddddd #oh my godddd #like he is still gay but without so much self loathing #I CANT DO IT #it makes me so upset #imnormal #itsnt normal #DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON DEAN.#how defeated and hopeless he gets like yessss pathetic but also in a way that i cant woobify too much becuase its all too real #just apathy and hopelessness #like when dean is grieving and hopeless im like HAHA YES #bc i have never experienced loss like that (s1 dean moment)#but in s5 he isnt grieving so much as just giving up and hopelesss #even at the end of the season when he doesnt say yes to michael its like #he is so sad #WAH #and like i said before not even the sexy sad of losing his wife or anthing #he just has to let his little brother sacrifice himself into torture hell forever and #he raised him and that was his little brother #he had to take care of and protect and watch him grow up #and so he watches his little brother throw himself into hell cage with lucifer the devil #and then goes to be heterosexual in the suburbs as it was said little brother's DYING WISH #dean always craved the normalcy of a nuclear family and having a home #but now its tainted by his ilttle brother's death and sacrifice and how he is in hell cage with lucifer #ACTUALLY HURTS MY STOMACH #ok so you know how i said dont get me started on dean #i got started on dean.

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wonder-worker · 11 months ago

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"[Elizabeth Woodville's] piety as queen seems to have been broadly conventional for a fifteenth-century royal, encompassing pilgrimages, membership of various fraternities, a particular devotion to her name saint, notable generosity to the Carthusians, and the foundation of a chantry at Westminster after her son was born there. ['On other occasions she supported planned religious foundations in London, […] made generous gifts to Eton College, and petitioned the pope to extend the circumstances in which indulgences could be acquired by observing the feast of the Visitation']. One possible indicator of a more personal, and more sophisticated, thread in her piety is a book of Hours of the Guardian Angel which Sutton and Visser-Fuchs have argued was commissioned for her, very possibly at her request."

-J.L. Laynesmith, "Elizabeth Woodville: The Knight's Widow", Later Plantagenet and Wars of the Roses Consorts: Power, Influence, Dynasty

#historicwomendaily #elizabeth woodville #my post #friendly reminder that there's nothing indicating that Elizabeth was exceptionally pious or that her piety was 'beyond purely conventional'#(something first claimed by Anne Crawford who simultaneously claimed that Elizabeth was 'grasping and totally lacking in scruple' so...)#EW's piety as queen may have stood out compared to former 15th century predecessors and definitely stood out compared to her husband #but her actions in themselves were not especially novel or 'beyond normal' and by themselves don't indicate unusual piety on her part #As Laynesmith's more recent research observes they seem to have been 'broadly conventional'#A conclusion arrived at Derek Neal as well who also points out that in general queens and elite noblewomen simply had wider means #of 'visible material expression of [their] personal devotion' - and also emphasizes how we should look at their wider circumstances #to understand their actions (eg: the death of Elizabeth's son George in 1479 as a motivating factor)#It's nice that we know a bit about Elizabeth's more personal piety - for eg she seems to have developed an attachment to Westminster Abbey #It's possible her (outward) piety increased across her queenship - she undertook most of her religious projects in later years #But again - none of them indicate the *level* of her piety (ie: they don't indicate that she was beyond conventionally pious)#By 1475 it seems that contemporaries identified Cecily Neville as the most personally devout from the Yorkist family #(though Elizabeth and even Cecily's sons were far greater patrons)#I think people also assume this because of her retirement to Westminster post 1485 #which doesn't work because 1) we don't actually know when she retired? as Laynesmith says there is no actual evidence for the traditional #date of 12 February 1487 #2) she had very secular reasons for retiring (grief over the death of her children? her lack of dower lands or estates which most other #widows had? her options were very limited; choosing to reside in the abbey is not particularly surprising. it's a massive and unneeded jump #to claim that it was motivated solely by piety (especially because it wasn't a complete 'retirement' in the way people assume it was)#I think historians have a habit of using her piety as a GOTCHA!' point against her vilification - which is a flawed and stupid argument #Elizabeth could be the most pious individual in the world and still be the pantomime villain Ricardians/Yorkists claim she was #They're not mutually exclusive; this line of thinking is useless #I think this also stems from the fact that we simply know very little about Elizabeth as an individual (ie: her hobbies/interests)#certainly far less than we do for other prominent women Margaret of Anjou; Elizabeth of York;; Cecily Neville or Margaret Beaufort #and I think rather than emphasizing that gap of knowledge her historians merely try to fill it up with 'she was pious!'#which is ... an incredibly lackluster take. I think it's better to just acknowledge that we don't know much about this historical figure #ie: I do wish that her piety and patronage was emphasized more yes. but it shouldn't flip too far to the other side either.

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sleep-nurse · 1 year ago

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crying again

#vent #i wish i could live life without the same worry having to ruin my entire day #without always being at risk of fuckijng dying every single day #i wish i could live a normal life #i just wish my family was normal

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moopbox · 26 days ago

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do u ever feel alive but not...

like ur body is alright n stuff but ur mind...isn't... I don't FEEL alive... its like I'm distant from me... I'm not here... I can feel my limbs I can feel the blood going through me I can feel everything that I've ever hurt.. I can breathe...I can see.. i can write these words down....but I'm just not. just not here my head is fuzzy,parts of me hurt..idk..

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