#i just think this would be so funny

[adoringmha]

doing that tik tok trend with katsuki where your bf ranks how mad he would be if another man touched you in different ways from 1 to 10...pls

the first image is someone squeezing your cheeks with one hand.

katsuki's jaw clenches, "no one would even be able to get that close to you."

you roll your eyes with a smile. "just imagine."

"then i'd blast his hand off." he blinks, serious as ever.

"you're not supposed to say what you'd do to them, you have to rank it."

he practically snarls. "one."

you laugh. "baby you have to be serious."

he cuts his eyes to you from the side. "does it look like i'm joking?"

"you have 10 things to rank, babe. i guarantee you that's not the worst thing you'll see."

he mutters to himself, "why did i agree to this." he sighs. "fine, four."

second, someone giving you a massage.

you swear, his eye twitches. "i'd break both his arms."

"that's not––"

"don't care." katsuki says matter of fact, adding his own rule to the game. "three."

third, you sitting in someone's lap, facing them.

he turns to look at you, offended.

you laugh, "why are you looking at me like i actually did it?"

he rolls his eyes. "tch, i'd break his kneecaps." he crosses his arms. "fucking one."

you sitting on someone's shoulders.

he runs a hand over his face in disbelief. "i'd knock him out, there's no way. why the fuck?-" he shakes his head. "two."

you stifle a laugh.

someone giving you a bath.

"immediately fucking no."

"katsuki-"

"they're all one, fuck it. we're done with this dumbass game."

[luthnethril]

I'm fond of Noldor!Lindir and Sinda!Lindir and Just Some Guy Lindir and I also enjoy Lindir-is-Actually-Maglor and Lindir-is-Actually-Daeron headcanons as much as the next person (and I'm partial to my personal hc that he's the son of Maglor's wife's niece with some Northern Sinda elf), but I have been thinking.

What if Lindir is Maglor and Daeron. At the same time.

Hear me out.

It is some time during the third age, and one of them makes it to Rivendell (my money is on Daeron being first) and decides to stay there. Wanting to remain anonymous, he chooses to go by 'Lindir' to avoid questions like "you're the Daeron/Maglor???" etc. Life goes on.

Now, the other one makes it to Rivendell also (I like the idea that Maglor is second bc he's dragged there by his ear) and wants to stay as well, and wishes also to remain anonymous for the same aforementioned reasons. Elrond very politely and very inconspicuously offers him to use the name 'Lindir'.

Life goes on. There are two Lindirs in Rivendell. Naturally, the two Lindirs in question do not remain unaware of this for long, which leads to a very heated discussion with Elrond bc "why would you give me his name do you think I want to copy him??" "Do you think I want people to mistake your terrible music as mine???"

( @morluin's idea that neither of them knows about the other and they both assume they are the only Lindir makes this scenario much much funnier, btw.)

Elrond offers that, since Lindir is a person that does not exist, there is no reason for his persona to be limited to a single person! It really is not very important since it allows them both their desired anonymity to outsiders! No one will really notice!!

Maglor, with dark curls to his knees and bright silver eyes and pale skin that has gone tanned and sun-kissed and dehydrated through continuous exposure to the sun without proper sunscream, and Daeron, with shorter gleaming silver hair and pale blue eyes the colour or morning dew, with even paler skin that makes him almost glow completely in the dark to mortal eyes: look at each other

But what Elrond wants, Elrond gets, even though in this instance he is almost definitely fucking with them. Life goes on.

Eventually Maglor and Daeron get over their petty arguments about sharing the same fake name and start having fun with it. They fuck with people on purpose. They go from prissy rivals to 'sexual tension tangible enough to cut with a knife' rivals and of course, eventually they have to fuck about it. And then they continue fucking with people in increasingly funnier ways as 'Lindir'.

Elrond wins.

Pseudo foster father within reach? Check ✅

Pseudo foster father's significant other who makes him happier? Check ✅

Anonymity for both of them that allows Elrond to escape headaches of having to explain to people Galadriel why he's sheltering a kinslayer by virtue of plausible deniability? Check ✅

Dramatic self-absorbed minstrels getting a hobby? 2/2 check ✅

[pyreshe]

also goo.d o.mens livvy and No one knows what she is or why her powers are there and angels demons etc are just like "what the fuck even is she?" and the answer is just "she's livvy!" and that being a running joke,

[dykejake]

next time greta van fleet performs caravel I want them to have backup dancers who’s outfits form a ship, a la turkey eurovision 2012

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Knowledge Revenge.

[inkskinned]

she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.

my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.

my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.

my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would know someone for only 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.

at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.

my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.

i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.

two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.

it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.

[doctorsiren]

Gravity Falls AU where everything is exactly the same except Bill’s parents are alive and well, and they’re just so proud of their chaotic dream demon son

[crumb-crumblet-s-crumbington]

elita pep talk

[spyglassrealms]

had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing

[chloesimaginationthings]

The FNAF Vanessas meet their younger selves..

[lotus-pear]

he’s begging kuni to let them eat pancakes for dinner

[egophiliac]

(looks at upcoming card releases)

I'm in danger :)

[johnconstantinesdick]

The most popular fic in the Steel Samurai fandom had an unexplained seven year hiatus only to update at like 3 am on December 21st, 2027. The author explains that they couldn’t update fic while in prison (huh?) but now that they’re off death row (WHAT??) they’ve transcribed seven years worth of writing (Jesus Christ). The update is 130k words long. Edgeworth and Maya don’t sleep that night.

[clownowo]

been replaying the Portal series I think this is where its heading

[thereallycoolmonsterithoughtup]

kabru and mithrun's fun succubus adventure

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Dog Meshi.