#i just rewatched it for the first time since like. 2017?

[redsodaz]

okay guys confession time... i still kinda like be more chill

[keerysfreckles]

august — cam cameron

pairing: cam cameron x fem!reader

summary: y/n has a summer job at the cousins bakery. cam cameron likes to find excuses to buy muffins every day.

warnings: none? just a long fic (i got carried away oopsies)

a/n: already rewatching tsitp and i finished it this week I LOVE IT SO MUCH FJSHJDHSH

masterlist !

⋆ ˚｡ ⋆ ୨୧ ˚

cousins beach was so surreal in the summertime. it was the busiest time of the year for the small town. the beaches were crowded and the boardwalk never slept.

everyone practically knew everyone. that's what y/n might have loved most about it. besides her close friend isabel conklin of course.

the girls met in the summer of 2017 when y/n's family started driving three hours to their newly bought beach house. it was in the same neighborhood as the beck house, meaning y/n and belly quickly became friends. belly always invited y/n over, and grew fondly of conrad and jeremiah fisher. she eventually learned to enjoy steven's presence as well.

the two girls have been inseparable since. every summer you'd find them attached at the hip, with conrad, jeremiah and steven following behind.

this summer however was different. not for belly though, she was still just as obsessed with the older fisher brother. the summer was already different for y/n. her father made the decision for the girl to get a summer job. her mother wasn't too thrilled with the idea, just wanting her daughter to have a memorable summer. but after officially getting hired at the local bakery, y/n didn't mind.

she's always loved going to the bakery. it was almost tradition for her mother to buy a pie to bring to susannah's fourth of july parties. y/n always begged for the double chocolate chip muffins before they left at the beginning of august. nine out of ten times she left with a smile on her face and a muffin in her hands.

the first week of work went smoothly for y/n. belly stopped by everyday to check on her. jeremiah went with her one morning for a muffin run, and conrad went with her once to buy chocolate chip cookies to cheer up a very upset steven.

two new faces came into the bakery with belly and the fisher brothers. conrad and jeremiah immediately went to the small stand with different flavors of cupcakes. belly walked up to the counter, with the two newcomers trailing behind her.

"hey bells," y/n smiles, leaning against the cold counter.

"hi," she smiles back, "i just had to bring everyone here for the best muffins in the whole wide world."

belly gestures to the two friends behind her. the girl to her right has dirty blonde hair, with thick mascara covering her eyelashes.

"this is taylor," taylor waves.

the boy to her left has brown curly hair, with darker skin than belly's, and y/n can't help but smile when be does.

"and this is cam," belly pushes him forward a bit.

"it's cam cameron actually!" jeremiah interrupts from the other side of the small store.

y/n can't help bit giggle, "cam cameron?"

"yeah, cam or uh- cameron works just as well."

y/n sends him one last smile before turning back towards belly, "so i'm guessing you didn't just come in here to chat?"

belly shakes her head and gives y/n the muffin order, including steven's request who was busy with his summer job at the pool as a server.

y/n was quick to pack the 7 muffins in a box before handing them to belly. she walked over to conrad after paying, with taylor following behind. cam sent a wave to y/n, which she happily reciprocated, before watching them walk out of the store.

—

the next day at the bakery was quite boring for y/n. an older couple came in and ordered a cake, and a family of four ordered a dozen muffins. y/n was in the middle of cleaning and rewriting on one of the chalkboards on the wall when the bell above the door rang.

"oh hey cam cameron!" y/n turned to see the curly headed boy from yesterday.

he smiled at the name, not hating it when it came out of her mouth.

"what can i do for you?" she sets down the chalk and walks behind the counter. cam follows as he stands on the opposite side.

he gives her his order, which was one blueberry muffin for himself to enjoy. she slides the small bag across the counter, but cam doesn't want to leave the store just yet.

"seeing as you're not busy," cam chuckles as he looks around the store, "do you mind if i keep you company?"

y/n instantly shakes her head, "no, no not at all. i'd actually love that today. it's been so slow."

cam nods, "yeah i saw the boardwalk was pretty busy on the way over here."

the pair talked for over an hour, when to both of them it only felt like ten minutes. y/n couldn't keep her smile off her face when he was around.

cam pauses in the middle of his story when his phone buzzes from his pocket. "shoot," he sighs, "my mom wants me home for lunch."

cam grabs his bag before walking towards the door, "i'll see you!"

y/n smiles and waves, "bye cam cameron."

for the rest of her shift y/n couldn't stop thinking about cam. their conversation earlier ranged from their favorite foods, to cam's love for marine biology, and even to y/n's hidden talent of being a boss at karaoke (belly's words, not hers.)

—

a week had passed and cam stopped by the bakery every day. his order varied from muffins, to cupcakes, to cookies. cam accidentally admitted to the girl he visited her to keep her company. it absolutely warmed her heart and a giggle fell from her lips.

y/n practically skipped out of the bakery and towards her yellow bike. she knew she'd call belly as soon as she got home to tell her what happened with cam today.

the phone rang once, then twice, then belly answered.

"hi y/n! what's up?"

"i may need some girl advice bells."

"i'm sorry?" belly's instantly confused by y/n's words.

y/n groans, not knowing how to word her feelings, "can you just come over? it'll be easier to explain."

not even five minutes after hanging up, belly's knocking on the pale blue door of y/n's parent's beach house.

"cam cameron asked me on a date," y/n was quick to the point once the two girls got to her room.

belly squealed, before asking a million questions. y/n happily answered them all, knowing belly was truly excited for her.

y/n explained to belly that cam asked her right before she left to go home after her shift at the bakery. the sun was setting, and cam was worried he'd miss her if he didn't jog the second half of the route from his house towards the bakery. she found it cute as he seemed more nervous around her today than any other day last week.

cam took a deep breath before asking y/n if she wanted to go to the boardwalk with him. with a bright smile the girl agreed.

which leads to her predicament, of not knowing weather or not cam cameron meant it as a date or not.

"he asked you personally, so obviously it's a date y/n," belly was looking through y/n's closet as the ladder layed on her unmade bed.

"but what if he just sees it as two friends hanging out?" y/n rebuttals.

belly doesn't answer, but instead she comes out with a navy blue corset type of tank top, and grabs the pair of shorts she found in y/n's dresser moments ago.

she holds the articles of clothing together, "because how can he see you as a friend if he sees you in this!"

both girls fall into a fit of giggles before you eventually get ready. y/n still had thirty minutes or so until cam was picking her up, so belly insisted on helping with the rest of the look.

she kept her hair natural, from it already being styled for work earlier in the day. she threw all her jewelry back on, considering she can't wear any at work. y/n always wore two necklaces, five rings (three on her left hand, two on the right), and a handful of bracelets adorned both her wrists.

belly helped with her mascara and lip gloss.

with one last look in her mirror, y/n and belly both giggled as a knock echoed through the whole house.

cam cameron was never speechless, but when he saw y/n standing in front of him words weren't even a thought.

"hi cam," she giggles.

"hey- hey y/n, you look great."

belly not-so-subtley squeezes her way between y/n and the door, greeting cam before she ran back to her own house.

cam and y/n started walking towards the boardwalk. the sun was still in the phase of setting. hues of orange, yellow and pink filled the sky with a couple of clouds.

the walk to the boardwalk wasn't the shortest, but y/n loved the amount of time she's able to spend with cam. they didn't stop talking the whole way there.

cam observed the girl, and noticed the small wrinkles around y/n's eyes when she laughed. he saw her fiddle with the ring on her thumb when she listened to him talk. he loved how excited she got talking about all her favorite rides at the boardwalk.

y/n wasn't the observant type, but cam was the only exception. her heart sped up when his smile got bigger as he talked about marine biology. he loved everything about whales. she noticed during the week, when he got nervous he runs his hand through his hair. he does the same motion as the two finally walk into the buzzing atmosphere of the boardwalk.

"so, what do you want to do first?" cam politely asks.

y/n can't help but giggle again, before grabbing onto his hand, "i have an idea." she simply grabs cam's hand and pulls him towards one of the many games.

—

y/n never thought her favorite night of summer would be with a boy she just met this year.

her and cam played almost every game on the boardwalk. y/n won most of them, but when cam beat her at ring toss, he gave her the purple stuffed giraffe, which she didn't dare loosen her grip on it for the rest of the night.

after games, the two sat down on a bench to eat. y/n had a massive plate of chilli cheese fries while cam had funnel cake. y/n wasn't one to question his choice, as he explained he ate an early dinner before he picked her up.

after eating they went into the arcade for a little over an hour. they walked out and the sky was now dark, with a million stars reflecting off the ocean.

now y/n and cam were walking side by side at the other end of the boardwalk. they were near the railing, away from all the games and bright lights, making it more quiet.

"i had a lot of fun tonight cam," y/n's smile hasn't left her face all day, and doesn't falter when she thanks him.

"me too, i'm glad you were able to come."

for a few moments it was quiet between the two. their hands kept brushing into each other's. y/n could feel the warmth radiating off of his hand, she couldn't help but slowly interlock her pinky with his.

"do you mind if we sit?" y/n points to a bench maybe ten feet away, "all the walking is finally catching up to me."

of course cam says yes. they sit beside each other on the cold bench, with the purple giraffe sitting lopsided by y/n's feet.

"are you not cold?" cam asks, suddenly remembering y/n was outside in only a tank top and shorts.

y/n shakes her head, "no uh- not really. i like the cold."

cam tilts his head towards her, "you sure? cause i could easily go to the gift shop for you."

y/n giggles at how sweet cam is, "really, i'm okay cam."

"do you know what you're gonna name it?" cam gestures to the giraffe he won for her earlier in the evening.

y/n shrugs, "i haven't really thought about it yet," she picks up the giraffe and studies it, "what about muffin?"

cam lets out a chuckle, "it's perfect."

a cool ocean breeze blows through the boardwalk. once it reaches y/n and cam, the girl shivers and subconsciously moves closer to cam. his cheeks flush slightly at the contact of her thigh pressing against his, and her shoulder bumping against his own.

"you sure about you not being cold?" cam laughs.

"okay, maybe it's a little cold now," y/n laughs with him.

silently, cam holds his hand open. y/n takes it, and a warm electric feeling flows through her body. cam's hand was shockingly warm, which was a great contrast to y/n's cold skin.

—

sadly, the fun night cam had planned for the pair had to come to an end. their hands never left each other's grip as cam walked y/n back to her house. once again, the two talked the whole way back.

y/n sighed once they reached the cobblestone driveway of her house. cam walked her up the steps of her porch, now turning to the girl once they reached the door.

"thank you for today cam," y/n thanked him again.

"i'm glad you had a good time," cam smiled down at the girl.

y/n smiled before leaning up to kiss the boy's cheek. her lips lingered there for a moment. just as she was about to unlock the front door, cam's voice stopped her.

"you missed."

y/n's eyesbrows furrowed.

"you missed," cam repeated.

before y/n can respond, cam grabs her hand again to pull her in front of him. he smiles before pushing his lips softly against y/n's. the kiss lasts for a few seconds before the girl pulls away. her cheeks are pink and her cold skin is suddenly warm.

"i really like you y/n," cam's voice is quiet, afraid to break the moment the two just shared.

to respond, y/n leans up to kiss cam again. this time one of her hands goes to his cheek to make the kiss become deeper. cam smiles against her lips, as his hold on her waist never falters.

this was the first of many dates for cam and y/n, and she loved every single one of them.

[love-byers]

stancy + mlvn music coding

this is probably gonna be messy but i will try my hardest to keep it comprehensible

okay so recently i was rewatching the robin/vickie/vickie's bf scene in the gun store (4x08) because i felt like i'd heard the song that plays there before. it reminded me of the song that plays during this scene in 2x01

the song that plays in the s4 scene is actually 2 songs back to back, the first called 'Kids Two' (a variation of 'Kids" from the s1 sound track) and the second called 'Choices', originally from the s2 soundtrack. 'Choices' plays in the scene in 2x08 where dustin apologizes to lucas for lying about dart and suggests max take his place in the party and also says he felt the electricity between lucas and max-- and it leads into the scene where max and mike talk about el, and mike reminds max that she's still not in their party. i find that interesting because no one in that scene says choice, and no one in either scene is making a choice. that name does make sense for the s4 scene, because vickie is torn between her boyfriend and robin, clearly implying she must make a choice. 'Choices' is the song that sounded familiar to me.

the songs aren't exactly the same, but they are definitely similar and the one in s4 is likely an edited version of the one from the stancy scene.

those scenes are obviously parallels, steve sneaks up behind nancy and scares her and they kiss, just like vickie and her bf. then nancy/vickie look at jonathan/robin in a seemingly yearning way. love triangle stuff.

i always figured the song in the stancy scene was an original track from season 2. but turns out it isn't from s2, its from s1. its called 'First Kiss', and, you guessed it, it plays during mike and el's first kiss in 1x08.

i am not lying, go and watch the scenes.

after discovering this, i watched some more stancy scenes to listen for more similarities in the music. and i came across this scene from 1x05, where nancy almost hits steve with her bat and he apologizes to her over dismissing her concern over barb, and nancy gives him a kiss.

i went through the s1 tracklist and even tried shazam-ing the scene, but nothing turned up. i thought it sounded like 'First Kiss', but i wasn't sure if it was my own bias feeding into that. so i went to reddit, where all the people with way too much time on their hands hang out, and asked if anyone knew which ost was playing in that scene. this is what i got back

the reddit gurus agree with me.

as they said, first kiss also plays when mike and el make up in the hospital in 3x05. makes sense, since it's supposed to be their song.

i will also add that the stancy scene in 1x05 is immediately followed by the scene of joyce kicking lonnie out. that speaks for itself. AND, the mlvn scene in 3x05 cuts directly from el smiling at mike to a dead body. take that as you will

so lets recap

'First Kiss', or a section/version of it, has played during

1x05 steve apologizes to nancy 1x08 mike and el kiss 2x01 steve scares nancy and stancy kiss, nancy yearns over jonathan 3x05 mike and el make up via m&ms

2 stancy scenes and 2 mlvn scenes.

hm.

and 'Choices', which i strongly believe is derived from 'First Kiss', plays during

2x08 dustin apologizes to lucas and points out the electricity between lucas and max 2x08 mike and max talk about el 4x08 robin watches vickie and her boyfriend kiss

2 references to a love triangle (dustin,lucas,max & robin,vickie,dan)

and a nod towards mlvn involving max, who in the next season will come between mike and el's relationship.

HM.

im not sure if any of these besides 'Choices' play in s4, but once i do a rewatch i will let you guys know. im pretty sure they don't because i have a weirdly good memory when it comes to my hyperfixations so i think i'd remember it. like i knew the music from the stancy scene in 2x01 just from watching it like four different times since 2017.

all of this coupled with the countless times byler has had music parallels with jancy and lumax, i'm pretty sure this means byler endgame.

if anyone tries to say that it doesn't matter that they reused mike and el's first kiss song for a loveless relationship, i wholeheartedly disagree with you. they make songs that are specifically for one scene and are never played again. for example 'The First Lie', the song that played during jonathan and nancy's first kiss has only played during that scene. never again.

so if mlvn is what the fans say it is, the main couple, the epic love story of stranger things, why can't they just have a song to themselves? jonathan and nancy do. im sure they could've found another song that fit for the stancy/jancy scene in 2x01, knowing the implications it would give if they used it. but nope, they had to use 'First Kiss', which takes place an episode before the stancy scene. 1x08 -> 2x01

one more example, 'On The Bus' is from the s2 soundtrack. it plays once during s2, when lucas and max talk on top of the bus. it doesn't play at all in s3, and then randomly in 4x04, it plays during a byler scene. THAT. HAS. IMPLICATIONS.

take this however you'd like

[bitletsanddrabbles]

Stolen Child: A Much Needed Screaming Fit

Okay, so, as I said earlier - I'm fine. The story's fine. I'm not angry at anyone about anything or shouting at or accusing anyone of anything or any of that sort of thing that I might come across as somehow because I'm shouting and only sort of semi-coherently. I'm just shouting because I need to shout.

Basically, I've been feeling increasingly just…tired and tense? The temperature spike this weekend did not help at all, since I am not a heat person and it narfs my sleep. And my brain finally phrased last month as "I didn't have a single day off in August because every time I wasn't at work I was some stripe of not-feeling-well", at which point the rest of my mind and body went "YES EXACTLY!" and doubled down on the exhaustion and anxiety. I also have another routine medical appointment next Tuesday and something going on with my hand that looks kinda like ringworm, but doesn't act like ringworm (and how would I have picked up ringworm there?), which I will need to make another appointment for. Which means I really need to have a good, old fashioned, overstimulated three-year-old level melt down about something I care about, but that is not ultimately important to the universe and then go…I dunno. Maybe eat some ice cream and take a nap. Definitely with the napping.

Since Stolen Child is kinda the Big Craft Community Craft Thing right now and ranting about it could, conceivably, generate some useful dialogue which always results in Happy Brain Chemicals (useful right now!), we're going with that one. So if you feel like reading through the flailing mental health fail rant and giving advice, observations, feedback, or just patting me on the head and saying "Don't forget to breathe, dear. Air is important", go right on ahead. If you don't, eh. Not your job. Feel free to keep scrolling.

And now! Here we go! Ready, set - MELT DOWN!

This right here? Is a great comment. It's a lovely comment. I love informative comments like this! There's only one problem with it:

I SERIOUSLY NEEDED THIS INFO BACK WHEN I WAS PLANNING THE ORIGINAL STORY!

See, back in 2017, when I was first plotting this whole thing, my plan was to have him wind up…not heir. I seriously think he'd be happier doing like Tom and Henry and living at Downton, but running a clock shop somewhere and letting Mary run the estate and George be the heir. Thing is, I didn't know that was possible just like that. I hadn't made any of my UK fan-friends at the time (heck, I don't think I had this account yet?). As I have mentioned a million times, I fail at research, although I have been slowly getting a bit better with help. So at the time I thought that an Earl's son became the heir, no questions asked, and no options unless they abdicated which was fully what I intended on having Thomas do after a bit of trying and getting a headache and having him and Mary both unintentionally-but-avoidably stomp all over each other's toes. Then I started rewatching (didn't make it through season one because I have officially hit the 'can't really watch things on my own' stage) and was immediately reminded that Matthew didn't have a choice but to be heir. Oh! Oops! Guess Thomas can't abdicate! Which is how we wound up with the current draft.

And this comment.

Now, I have no reason to disbelieve the statement that they don't need to recognize Thomas, but I can't think of why my UK friends wouldn't have pointed it out at some point, except that I did always call it the Thomas-as-Heir fic which could have lead to the concept that heir was my desired end game. Or perhaps it was one of those things that just didn't get questioned because subconsciously they thought it was my desired end game. Or maybe something else perfectly logical! I mean, there are reasons it could have happened, but my brain is not braining good right now, so. Point being, I didn't know and I'm still not sure and this firmly falls outside of my 'things I can comfortably research'. If it were modern, sure! But history?

Seriously, my researching lessons in school extended to 'go to the library and read a book' and stopped. There was nothing about how to gauge how trustworthy the book was, or if there was, I didn't learn it because I moved through three school districts (five if you count college and uni) and wasn't in the right district at the right time. Given how obvious it is that there are a lot of history books out there that straight up lie (and I don't just mean the school texts. I've tried to teach myself history in recent years and wound up straight up calling bull shit on several books), this leads to massive trust issues. I asked at my local library if they had a research librarian on staff and bless his heart, the fellow I was talking to didn't even know what that was. There's another library nearby that is bigger, but I keep forgetting that it's part of our library system now and honestly I don't even know how to drive there and don't like driving in that area anyway and I'm not even sure the busses will take me there in a reasonable manner given public transport in this area. I know I've heard of a couple other tricks over the years that I've carefully noted down in places I've forgotten about so that I could reference them later.

…yeah.

And if it is true (which I have every reason to believe it is), what then? I've already set up the entire story to have Thomas be recognized as heir! I mean, I could put it on hold and rewrite the ending. There are a couple of scenes that would be easy, but others would be straight up impossible. I'd also have to lose at least three scenes that I've been looking forward to sharing and that people would love, and I don't know what I'd replace them with, and I'd have to rewrite the dinner scene (*straight up cries at the thought*), and I am a slow writer, so I have no idea when it would be done! I kinda hate the idea of telling everyone "We're going to be a chapter a week!" and then three chapters later going "Haha, just kidding! Indefinite hiatus while I fix the entire plot!" Especially since right now reader comments are definitely my primary 'happy chemical' source and I need that! On the other hand, I really, really love the idea of this being a one shot and not having to figure out what happens next! But it might not get done for another ten years if I try that!

If I do stick with him as heir, it seems like people would know that not recognizing him was an option, so I'd still need to do some rewriting to explain why he winds up heir! And why would he? The only thing I can come up with given my current setting is Cora pitching an ever loving (dignified, restrained) fit over the idea of not acknowledging him and he and Robert just going "OKAY OKAY WE YIELD!" which will still take some rewriting, but a lot less (I think I can keep the rewrites ahead of the posting schedule for the most part maybe?), and will still leave me figuring out where we go from here, but might work as a decent compromise?

Either way, I have to figure out what I'm doing before I post next week's chapter! And all my brain wants to do is melt into a puddle of goo for a month! The idea of trying to research or plot or anything like that just makes me want to sit in the shower and cry! I WANT A MONTH'S VACATION FROM LIFE, DAMN IT ALL!

Edit: I now have an appointment to have my hand looked at this Wednesday.

[absolutebl]

500 BLs - My Top 50

Somehow, in the mad end of year rush, I missed the fact that the BL Spreadsheet of Doom tipped over and into 500 BLs. Yep, I’ve now watch over 500. 

Top 50 BLs - The Elite 10% 

Seven Days - Japan 2015 (oldest BL on this list, also hold #1 spot, cute)

We Best Love: No. 1 For You & Fighting Mr. 2nd - Taiwan 2021 

Semantic Error - Korea 2022

Light On Me - Korea 2021

Until We Meet Again - Thai 2019

To My Star - Korea 2021

Color Rush- Korea 2021

Old Fashion Cupcake - Japan 2022

Takara-kun and Amagi-kun - Japan 2022

Minato's Laundromat - Japan 2022

My Beautiful Man - Japan 2021

Cherry Blossoms After Winter - Korea 2022

HIStory 2: Crossing the Line - Taiwan 2018

Cherry Magic - Japan 2020

Bad Buddy - Thai 2022

A Tale of Thousand Stars  - Thai 2021

Oxygen - Thai 2020

Be Loved In House: I Do - Taiwan 2021

Lovely Writer - Thai 2021

He's Coming to Me - Thai 2019

Blueming - Korea 2022

My Ride - Thai 2022

Wish You - Korea 2020

Not Me - Thai 2022

Nobleman Ryu's Wedding - Korea 2021

Love By Chance - Thai 2018

See You After Quarantine? - Taiwan 2021

Addicted - China 2016

Long Time No See - Korea 2017

My Tooth Your Love - Taiwan 2022

Why R U? - Thai 2020

The Tasty Florida - Korea 2021

About Youth - Taiwan 2022

SOTUS - Thai 2016

DNA Says Love You - Taiwan 2022

My Love Mix Up - Japan 2021

Roommates of Poongduck 304 - Korea 2022

The Eclipse - Thai 2022

Dark Blue Kiss - Thai 2019

Oh! Boarding House - Korea 2022

My Day - Pinoy 2020

Ocean Likes Me - Korea 2022

Gameboys - Pinoy 2020

Cutie Pie - Thai 2022

Life: Love on the Line - Japan 2020 

Love Class - Korea 2022

Restart After Come Back Home - Japan 2020

Tinted With You - Korea 2022

2gether - Thai 2020

Choco Milk Shake - Korea 2022

Rankings aren’t fixed (outside of the three ratings). I basically just asked myself which one would I want to rewatch right now. 

Bold = 10/10 (#1 ... #7)

Italics = 9/10 (#8 ... #25) 

everything else is 8/10

Absolute BL not included because it’s parody 

Love is Science? & Puppy Honey not included because BL is a B plot

Word of Honor has been censored off the list. Fuck that noise. 

The following are highly ranked shorts

A First Love Story - Korea 2021 

Just Friends? - Korea 2009 (would have been the oldest on the list)

Some More Korea - 2018 

This is as of the end of 2022. Not responsible for any additional awesome BLs that have aired since then.

[c-is-for-circinate]

MCU 2024 Rewatch MASTERPOST: yeah sure why not

Fuck it, guess we're doing this! I, in the year of our lord 2024, am watching my way through the full MCU, in release order. Just that kind of masochist I guess. And because this is the Masochism And Schadenfreude website, you all get to watch!

One of the reasons I'm doing this is because I actually really want to track where it feels like the MCU went wrong. I saw the original Iron Man in theaters in 2008 (twice!), and it was genre-defining in several ways that seem very distant after sixteen years and thirty-some-odd movies. We all watched these for a reason! Time to figure out what it was and also where it got lost.

Note: for now we're skipping the various TV shows, Agents of SHIELD, the assorted Netflix miniseries, Agent Carter...it is Too Much and unlike Twitch reacters, I ain't getting paid for this shit. We're also skipping The Incredible Hulk. Fight me on it.

I have seen...some of these. Pretty much everything through Civil War, and then most things through Infinity War, and basically nothing since then. So it's also going to be interesting to see how future knowledge impacts some of the earlier movies, and then y'all are going to get my actual reactions to the later movies. Which I'm sure will be fun for SOMEBODY.

Anyway I'll be tagging everything as C Watches MCU 2024, and I'll link below on the list after the readmore as reactions happen. Hopefully this whole list will keep me honest!

(oh god there are 32 movies on this list even skipping the Hulk. why am I doing this to myself. what have I begun. why.)

Iron Man (2008)

The Incredible Hulk (2008) THIS DOES NOT COUNT AND I'M NOT DOING IT

Iron Man 2 (2010)

Thor (2011)

Captain America: The First Avenger (2011)

The Avengers (2012)

Iron Man 3 (2013)

Thor: The Dark World (2013)

Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014)

Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)

Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015)

Ant-Man (2015)

Captain America: Civil War (2016)

Doctor Strange (2016)

Guardians of the Galaxy 2 (2017)

Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)

Thor: Ragnarok (2017)

Black Panther (2017)

Avengers: Infinity War (2018)

Ant-Man and the Wasp (2018)

Captain Marvel (2019)

Avengers: Endgame (2019)

Spider-Man: Far From Home (2019)

Black Widow (2021)

Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (2021)

Eternals (2021)

Spider-Man: No Way Home (2021)

Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022)

Thor: Love and Thunder (2022)

Black Panther: Wakanda Forever (2022)

Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (2023)

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023)

The Marvels (2023)

[bluesuns3t]

Recently I was doing some report on "why I always fall for fictional men and never fall in love with men in real life"

I watch all of my favorite series and movies, and it occurred to me that Japanese fictional characters have been very interesting to me rather than any fictional men from other countries. At first, I was not finding the reason why until I realized

The expression of the male lead. I don't know what I should call it cause some of them are from BL. I always captivated on how they look at their partner with some lust in their eyes but also look vulnerable at the same time. Let me give you an example

1. Segasaki from My Personal Weatherman

This is the first series of rewatch cause I want to feel the butterfly in my stomach everytime Segasaki look at Yoh. I mean what this man deal so he can look like that. Everytime he look at yoh it's like he's ready to devour him right there right now. I can't get enough of his facial expression

2. Haiba Jin from Tsuiraku JK to Haijin Kyoshi

I don't know what his deal for having such a seductive look. It's kinda inappropriate but ppfftt I don't really care. I know I'm weird cause teacher and student relationships has been my fave trope since forever.

3. Ito sensei from Sensei (2017)

I've always been Toma ikuta fans even since I watch Bokura ga Ita way back when I was in junior high. But one day, he decided to play as a teacher who has feeling for his students and I was like "hold my heart for a sec" cause I know it going to be lit.

4. Sakurai sensei from Close Range Love

If you familiar with student-teacher love story you might also watch close range love. The student teacher relationship between Sakurai senses dan yuni it just *chef's kiss.

5. Tendo Sensei fron An Incurable Case Of Love

As a nurse i might said, there's a part of my life wanting to find a doctor as my future husband but none of all my colleagues look like Takeru Sato and to be honest I'm very disappointed.

6. Togawa from Old Fashioned Cupcakes

I've seen unhealthy amounts of (specifically) this scene. There is no need for further explanation.

I might writing for part 2

[supermaks]

Top 10 essential Verstappen races list please!

I habe been watching since I was a literal infant but I kinda took a break from 2014 until 2018 so I missed a lot of teenage Max lore. Now I treated myself to some f1tv for Christmas and want to rewatch a couple old races!!!

Malaysia 2015 Baby boys first points on his 2nd ever f1 start. Drags that lil toro rosso to q3 and then beats both red bulls. Also very funny to listen to the sky commentary because they dont take him seriously at all but he keeps doing things with that car he shouldnt be able to do so they have to keep talking about him and they're so annoyed about itnklfdjgkfdj

Singapore, 2015 classic max race. car d1es at the start. somehow makes it back on track 1 lap down, waits for his main character moment. gets it on lap 13. breezes past the field. gets told to swap positions. literally yells 'NO' and does not do it. U thought brazil 2022 was shocking, well. Educate yourself

USA, 2015 first of all there was a whole hurricane happening bro like a literal hurricane everything about thsi race is like .. what is going on. Hello. Is that Elton John???? Mind you, its Max's rookie season. Austin with wet conditions is the race track equivalent of a fucking minefield I think like half the grid retired. And still, u will witness that lil boy bring the fight to Merc and Ferrari. He actually fought Lewis and Seb Vettel for a podium. In a toro rosso. yeah

Spain, 2016 anime protagonist race. lil babby makes the jump to the big sister team amid much mockery and controversy, and wins on his debut. I can't say this enough. Max has made a career out of owning up to bitches. Every single time. Mercs take each other out, Danny ric gets inexplicably put on a 3 stopper ((lmfao)), and Max holds off fucking RAIKKONEN on DRS!!!! for like a billion years. Not a wheel out of place. And not even his defining moment of the year. For that, u gotta go with--

Brazil, 2016 He became MOTHER age 19 in Interlagos. Nothing else to say. if ur a verstappie u gotta watch Brazil 2016 like twice a year for ur troubles

China, 2017 just a super underrated race imo. Imma go on a tangent for a bit sorry but one of most insane aspects of Max's move to f1 is that he did so with 1 year of experience in f3. Like f3 had been the strongest engine he'd driven up to that point. f3 cars are fast but they're not f1 fast. So Max was supposed to be like a lil squid in a bowl of sharks. To anybody else it wouldve been extremely intimidating and scary to make that jump and its likely they would've sacrificed speed just because they didn't have that confidence in the car yet. And there'd be nothing wrong with that, thats just normal. Well Max never did normal. Seb put it perfectly and Im pretty sure he's not the first driver to comment on this, but Max goes for moves that nobody in their right mind would even dream of attempting. Shit that takes a special type of instinct, but more than that, a complete lack of fear. And with that comes the other side of the sword, which is the recklessness. Max was a reckless driver. A lot of drivers can be reckless, especially if the car doesn't allow them to just cruise to podiums, but Max was a child. This race is so important in his curriculum because it solidifies that his recklessness is not foolishness, but necessity. Bro passed 9 cars in one lap and held off danny ric with older tires. This after a disaster quali where he finished second to last because of an engine problem. To come back from that and get a podium the way he did, its a character drive. It showed who he was and Max was the future

Mexico, 2017 here. Yeah

Austria, 2018 quali is a must watch for this one. Listening to Max educate his engineers on 'discipline' for even DARING to ask him to pass danny ric prolly makes that move to Renault less confusing. Like u cant fight that. That is not a mf who will ever let u win a world title. But he didnt show it just during quali. This race is important because u can compare it some of his most dominant 2022 victories, in a car that would literally spit out its own tires and explode if Max idk farted or something.

USA, 2018 ok I'm biased but max has never come to the US and not served. Idk why its kind of funny but every time he steps foot in here he stunts and gets super wet and looks amazing. He's also absurdly good in US circuits for no reason. Like Max says, u gotta know how to defend not just attack. Prolly one of the most impressive defensive performances from him here, against none other than sir hammer herself. Lew had fresher tires and a championship winning merc and still couldnt crack lil bro with his renault engine, cap and a dream. Also they literally installed a whole new curb on the track specifically to make drivers stick to track limits and called it the verstopper and that. literal tears in my eyes yk look at this shit

Look at her . anyway

Enjoy thjs humble selection of our fav boy genius/fbi most wanted best hits. Next up

✨😤 Part 2 😤✨ Part 3 🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨

[gardenerian]

TAG GAME! IT'S TIME FOR A TAG GAME! ty darling @creepkinginc @deedala and @energievie for this lovely walk down memory lane 🥰

how did you get into the fandom? i was here on tumblr for another fandom (shall not be named) when a friend reblogged a clip from s10. i had not kept up with shameless for a few seasons, but then i immediately rewatched and caught up... the rest is history!

how long have you been here? let's see - that was december 2019.... omg 😭 i have had this blog since 2017, and have been on tumblr on and off since 2010 tho askdhf i live here 🏡

what's the first fandom channel you found? (youtube, reddit, tumblr, insta, twitter, FB, other?) tumbles 4ever

what's your favourite now? see above 😇

which mutual have you known the longest in the fandom? i'm pretty sure it's @sickness-health-all-that-shit! one of the very first shameless blogs i followed, who for some reason decided to follow me back and i am forever grateful for my dearest rita 🥺

which tumblerinos did you have your first fandom crush(es) on and wanted to get to know? oh man so many! most of my early crushes are no longer active 😔 but they are so close to my heart always! but i also very much remember throwing my phone across a hotel room in excitement when i first saw @whatwouldmickeydo in my inbox ✨

first gallavich fan fic you read (or that blew you away that you remember)? always always always @palepinkgoat - i will never recover from my first reading of restoration.

first fan art that blew your mind? literally anything by @steorie!

fanfic trope that you were sure wasn't for you but now you low key (or high key) love? apparently i am really into the apocalypse askdfh

what surprised you most about this fandom? i think it's how... elastic (??) it is? like. maybe bc it was such a long running show, but i just love how the fandom grows and evolves over time. people are always welcome! whether they're brand new or are returning home... there's always excitement and love for everyone. it made my time away from the fandom bearable, knowing there was always a place for me to come back to when i was ready.

moment in the show (or YT vids if you're one of those) that you fell in hyperfixation with gallavich? 🗣 SORRY I'M LATE

ian or mickey? ian girlie (gender neutral) but i strongly feel you can't love one without the other!!!!

which gallagher or milkovich are you? oh. god. oh god i'm probably lip askdjlfh with the softness of one ian gallagher

TAGGING SOME BABIES

@metalheadmickey

@howlinchickhowl

@heymacy

@whatthebodygraspsnot

@heymrspatel

@gallawitchxx

@darlingian

@fionnagallagher

@rereadanon

@crossmydna

@callivich

@too-schoolforcool

@vintagelacerosette

@mickeym4ndy

@mickittotheman

@mmmichyyy

@sleepyfacetoughguy

@michellemisfit

and all the babes tagged above! 🍅

[isagrimorie]

I rewatched episode 9 of season 1 of 12 Monkeys and then leaped to episode 9 of season 4. And god, it's such a perfect circle and the continuity is glorious.

I don't know if Terry Matalas and the other writers planned it this way but in season 1, episode 9 (Tomorrow) Cole is trapped in 2017 and meets this version of Cassie:

And the first time I watched it, I thought it was because Cassie grew older, that would make sense right?

But then after watching the whole series I realized, no, no that's not the reason. The reason why Cassie has the white streak is that this Cassie has already been to the future and splintered several times!

Cassie got the white streak in her hair from grappling with this medieval dude in season 4 to get the weapon.

Season 1!Cole is still so... not innocent but he doesn't know what he has in his future, he still thinks it's as easy as stopping one person.

Cassie mentions how his mission in Chechnya felt like a million years ago because, for Cassie, it has. She's been through too much. She has done something so unbelievably terrible.

Cassie tells Cole: "A lot has happened since then... with you and me."

Understatement of the century.

Because to their very horror, the whole mission they've set their whole life fighting against. Stopping the plague, saving the billions of lives lost, and to be faced with the heart-stopping realization that they were the ones who start the plague.

Even more horrific for Cassie is the realization that she is the one who has triggered it. She sacrificed so much to stop the plague from happening and to know the horror as a Doctor, whose whole mission in life is to stop it...

Then to compound horror upon horror is the realization that Cole himself has to be erased so they can reset the whole timeline. It's just...

Time has already made a murdered of Cassie, and now time is taking away the only other person she loves the most.

This is why this back in season 1, episode 9 this hug meant everything to Cassie:

For Cassie she has loved and lost him already, she is the version who returns to this moment to set up everything that needs to be set-up to complete the causality of a time loop.

Like now with the benefit of hindsight:

"I thought it was over... and that you were erased."

Because Cole hasn't gone on the splinter chair yet to be erased, this timeline is still going because, in the future, Cole still existed. And Cassie is here in her present-past.

And it also makes so much sense why she's sick because she was that close to the pathogen, this is why she dies. And this version of Cassie is the body past!Cole will find it in the pilot episode.

It's all so cyclical and interconnected and it's just so chef's kiss.

Best. Time. Travel. Show. Ever.

[bwaldorf]

ramasha do you have any bollywood movie recs?? 🎤

omgggg em im so honored you thought of me!! 🫶🏼🩷

tbh i've sorta been on a journey of watching more bollywood (and south asian cinema in general), since there was a huge chunk of my life where i just never really kept up with releases and was sorta discouraged from watching it so my taste isn't the Most diverse (in terms of genres and years) but i'm working on it 😭 that said, here's my attempt at giving you a lot of different options, so hopefully there's something here that strikes your fancy hehe :3

lots will be under the cut bc im a huge YAPPER.... sorry. also, some of these haven't really aged that well and are sometimes more of just a nostalgic fav and/or ones i think are iconic so... take some of these recs with a grain of salt

some of my bigger personal faves:

om shanti om (2007) — it may hit more if you have a bit more exposure to bollywood cinema and its industry bc it references it a lot, but i still think it's an enjoyable movie regardless! (yes i am biased bc this is one of my fav bollywood movies ever + a huge nostalgic fav. plus SRK and deepika padukone.. can't go wrong there!)

haider (2014) — this movie is SOOOO good! i highly rec it 💞 it's an adaptation of hamlet, set within the backdrop of the 1995 kashmir conflicts. this is actually a part of trilogy of shakespeare adaptations by the director: the other two are maqbool (2003) which is macbeth and omkara (2006) which is othello

main hoon na (2004) — another SRK nostalgic fav

ghajini (2008) — it rips off christopher nolan's memento but i think it adds a lot of its own stuff too and i have a soft spot for it 😭

andhadhun (2018)

kahaani (2012)

tumbbad (2018)

amar singh chamkila (2024)

3 idiots (2009) — the most likely one that non regular bollywood watchers will know and deservedly so imo

gully boy (2019)

hum saath saath hain (1999) — okay not objectively the best movie.. but its a hugely nostalgic and comfort movie for me and i think its great if you wanna watch something that's heartfelt and doesn't have a ton of high stakes conflict

maine pyar kiya (1989) — same as above ☝🏼 i watched this one a lot as a kid

jab we met (2007)

devdas (2002) — worth it for at least the beautiful cinematography, costumes, and gorgeous talented cast

fanaa (2006) ��� plot is kinda messy at times but it was a real angst machine for me as a kid 😭

photograph (2019)

sir (2018)

bulbbul (2020) — tw for a rape scene though. sorry for the spoiler but it was genuinely really harrowing for me to watch so i think its important to mention

misc other movies i've seen:

qala (2022)

dil bole hadippa! (2009) — admittedly, i haven't rewatched this one in a long time so i can't totally say it holds up. it's a rip-off of she's the man, but … better….. TO ME. yes im speaking from nostalgia bc this is the one i saw first

badhaai do (2022) — this is technically a 'sequel' to the similarly titled movie badhaai ho (2018) but they're actually total standalones

gangubai kathiawadi (2022) — i have such mixed feelings about this one but it's a movie that really stuck with me ever since i watched it soooo yeah

raees (2017) — SRK looks unbelievably fine in that movie. need i say more?

koi mil gaya (2003) — it's a mix of both ET and close encounters of the third kind... but in my very biased, nostalgic opinion: better 🫣 there's also a few sequels, but i only really remember seeing krrish (2006)

josh (2000) — another entry to the SRK looks super gorgeous in this movie 😭 this is basically a desi west side story

go goa gone (2013) — not the best to me, but its a bollywood zombie movie! which was a very new concept to me in that industry so ofc i had to throw it in there

chennai express (2013)

mohabbatein (2000)

dilwale dulhania le jayenge (1995) — had to include this for SRK reasons and also bc it's a massively impactful movie in the industry so i'd be remiss not to

andaz apna apna (1994)

ek ladki ko dekha toh aisa laga (2019)

jaane tu.. ya jaane na (2008)

aaja nachle (2007)

munna bhai mbbs (2003)

gangs of wasseypur - part 1 (2012) — i've only seen the first one in this series but if you want a somewhat slower, meditative, gangster movie this one def fits the bill

what's your raashee? (2009) — can't remember how well this ages (i think it was pretty mid?) but the concept is fun! priyanka chopra plays 12 girls: each personifying a different zodiac sign as the main guy tries to find his soulmate 😭

taare zameen par (2007) — you'll also see this listed as 'like stars on earth' sometimes

amar akbar anthony (1977)

don (2006) — villainous SRK? sign me up! he actually has multiple movies where he's this sorta antihero/"antivillain" type character. and even a few where he's a straight-up villain. i've been trying to get through all of those bc i just love his range

anjaam (1993) — an example of the aforementioned thing ☝🏼 SRK plays a genuinely terrible guy here, and i love how it actually challenges a lot of the tropes that bollywood tends to use in its romances and shows how creepy and stalkerish they actually are (despite it being typically framed in the narrative otherwise)

partner (2007) — i recently found out it was basically ripping will smith's hitch 😭 i haven't seen that one so i can't say which is better, but if you enjoyed that one, you'll probably be into this one too. it's very unserious and not the Best. but i watched it a lot as a kid

aaja nachle (2007)

roadside romeo (2008) — okay this is a very unserious, low budget animated movie rec. it's soooo so silly and dumb but if you're in the market for smth like that, this is an amusing one for that

welcome (2007) — i gotta rewatch this one bc i don't remember a lot but it seems like a lot of tomfoolery and shenanigans

my name is khan (2010) — another one i gotta rewatch for its politics but i figured i'd throw it in regardless

black (2005)

kal ho naa ho (2003)

kuch kuch hota hai (1998)

sholay (1975)

hungama (2003)

some from my watchlist that i haven't seen yet:

(as if this list needed to be any longer.... but anyways! including these bc i think they seem promising/interesting and i think they introduce More variety of genres/time periods than the ones before)

ijaazat (1987)

thappad (2020)

udaan (2010)

merry christmas (2024)

chhoti si baat (1976)

hindi medium (2017)

the lunchbox (2013) — heard LOTS of good things about this one!

lipstick under my burkha (2017)

neerja (2016)

queen (2014)

rajnigandha (1974)

kaagaz ke phool (1959)

anand (1971)

paheli (2005) — it's a mainstream bollywood remake of duvidha (1973)

baadshah (1999)

monica, o my darling (2022)

madhumati (1958)

raaz (2002)

satya (1998)

highway (2014)

oh darling! yeh hai india! (1995)

pyaasa (1957)

sardar udham (2021)

awaara (1951)

shree 420 (1957)

kaminey (2009)

mahal (1949)

chandigarh kare aashiqui (2021)

bunty aur babli (2005)

talvar (2015)

duplicate (1998)

lootera (2013)

mughal-e-azam (1960)

baazigar (1993)

trapped (2017)

fire (1996) — a hugely significant movie in explicitly showing a wlw relationship in bollywood. i believe it was the first in that regard?

stree (2018)

piku (2015)

english vinglish (2012)

umrao jaan (2006) — there's also an earlier version of this movie with the same title that came out in 1981! i haven't seen either yet so i can't say which is better

jodhaa akbar (2008)

darr (1993) — big movie for villain SRK enthusiasts if that interests you too like it does me 🤭

zindagi na milegi dobara (2011)

dil dhadakne do (2015)

dear zindagi (2016)

special 26 (2013)

badla (2019)

mardaani (2014)

raman raghav 2.0 (2016)

peepli live (2010)

drishyam (2015)

[6mayhem]

top ten men??

okay.....this is a long personal post BE PREPARED!!! to find me cringe after this

in no particular order and most are also gonna be fictional LOLOLOLOLOL starting with the real people tho

gerard way...what can i say..... just 10/10 who I'm trying to be. All my problems would be solved if I could 100% embody him body mind and soul circa mid 2000s because spiritually that's who i was born to be. also the music is good very good. does he even count as a man anymore everyone's a transgender nowadays. anyway i don't actually know anything abt him apart from the stage persona and that's the way I'm trying to keep it bc everything i learn about celebrities I learn against my will

manuel germanletsplay. god i was so obsessed with him as a teenager. for the americans: he was of the biggest german gaming/minecraft youtubers and national heartthrob among teen girls. everyone shipped him with his friends including me THE FANFICSSSS..... he inspired a lot of transgenderism in me due to his twinky nature and his piano talent and long hair and the fact he never (to this day) showed his face. his persona was like a real life creepypasta character when it comes to sex appeal

isak valtersen skam..... skam is like my longest running hyperfixations i first watched it circa 2017 and have been rewatching at LEAST twice a year since then. idc that it's a teen show.......... he contributed greatly to my transgenderism. I love manipulative teen guys who are just the absolute fucking worst when you look at it objectively. he was such a male manipulator the whole s1 arc rlly made him out to be such a mastermind supervillain it was so silly. and then he got rlly pathetic in s3 ❤️❤️❤️❤️ anyway awesome outfits also..And anger issues

mickey milkovich shameless.... don't feel like I need to explain. WHAT AN ARC !!! he's a terrible person but like somehow the most sympathetic character in the entire show. everything past s7 was such flanderization it made me mad as hell but before that waowwaow.....he deserved better. my meowmeow. would move mountains and literally kill people for the most average annoying guy ever (real mickey fans hate ian) (jk hes fine minus the last 2 seasons)

syd march antiviral. what a fucking freak. he's got everything. blood kink. appearance of a sickly victorian child. horrible daddy issues. bisexuality. a thinly veiled transgender subplot. he's just so slimy and greasy and you just wanna punch him the entire movie I love it. big fan. also a male manipulator..U never know how much of his weakness is real and how much is faked to gain people's trust. he's just like me when it comes to obsessing over random beautiful women!!

sven kretschmer from ich hasse liebeslieder. no one knows this book because it was posted in like 2015 on a german fanfiction website but it permanently changed my brain chemistry. wow. i love him so much. he's everything to me. eyeliner wearing bisexual emo with greasy black hair who canonically looks like gerard way and struggles with every mental issue under the sun. erectile dysfunction subplot. has an abusive father. my favorite band is only kj because that's HIS favorite band. you could trace back 90% of who I am as a person to sven. HE BECAME A TATTOO ARTIST ALSO THAT'S SO COOL!!! and he's the most loyal bastard ever just a kicked puppy kinda guy i love men who are really clingy in relationships. but at the same time he also has insane anger issues which I ALSO love in a man GRIN 😁 😁 😁 😁 😁 ^^^^ see above faves this is a whole archetype of guy for me

jack as you are.... See profile pic!! you already knowwwww!!!!! he's just like me fr. sheltered/seen as weak and sensitive and longing to be rebellious and do things to impress other men (in a homosexual way). maybe transgender? maybe killed his best friend/brother/lover!! again...greasy long hair YAYYY!!! the whole movie could be a forcemasc fantasy

mirco from this sorta obscure book called landeplatz der engel....his mother rejected him. the woman who took him in is a prostitute.... he says ableist slurs but is the least ableist person in the whole book...he wears a ring with a jewel in the shape of a boar head how cool is that?? and he stole a car. and does illegal car races. and ditched his girlfriend for his new male best friend. and he's secretly really traumatized but never wants to be a victim and gets mad when you imply his past affected him 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 idk I just love how he never pretends to be a better person than he is, but the opposite of it. He never gives himself credit for how kind he is

will graham... What a fucking freak(2). proves that your life isn't over at 30 you can still find the love of your life and do really weird shit because you decided that the only thing you care about is what a freaky european cannibal thinks of you.

adam saw....what can i say. he's awesome. he's transgender. he's funny. he's tragic. he's in love with a man twice his age while his brain can't decide if it should see him as a father figure or romantic interest. relatable to me personally

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

my oc neph bell because he's awesome and basically me

steve harrington and eddie munson from stranger things bc i still ship it (there's zero canon moments but idgaf about canon its stupid anyway) bc 1. Tragic blond failson with daddy issues and 2. eddie gave me aesthetic aspirations fuel for like a full year before i figured out who i wanna be. so yeah. I'm only a little bit ashamed of this

tyler durden fight club because yeah. and by extension the narrator bc the moments where he acted like a proper weird fucker were so funny and also meeeeeeee x3

nezumi no.6 you edgy fucker

mo folchart inkheart bc i always wanted him to be my father

kurt cobain

my other oc cesar liehmann bc he embodies everything i like re: blond men with anger issues who have to compensate for their average height by acting more confident than they are

free space for whoever i might be forgetting rn. I always have a LOT of thoughts about fictional men....

SHIN TSUKIMI FROM YTTD LOL I REMEMBER BEING CRAZY ABT HIM

max zerophilia... just completely embraces his sexuality and status as a Z. shamelessly in love with both luke and luca. HOT!!!! kind of bad at flirting but it works for him. AND HE'S ALSO HOT AS MICHELLE AND I'M BISEXUAL SO THAT'S THAT

[tarisilmarwen]

Rebels Rewatch: "Twin Suns"

In which the end of the Malachor arc is profoundly beautiful.

First off, obligatory live reaction version from 2017.

Second, I would be remiss if I did not link back to this close read of "Twin Suns" (by greenreticule here on Tumblr), from which I draw quite a bit of my own analysis and opinions about the themes and messages of the episode. Check it out sometime, there's ten parts (technically eleven but the last post in the series is more of a memoir/personal reflection by the author and therefore not as relevant to our meta purposes) and it is a loooooong read but worth it, in my opinion. I don't always agree with every single point of the analysis (the stuff about the Sequel Trilogy, for example) but there's a lot of things that resonate and that I incorporate into my own interpretation of the episode so I figured I'd mention the source.

Onwards!

Rather appropriately we open on a shot of the titular twin suns themselves.

The next series of shots are stark and empty, nothing but the vast white desert, emphasizing the loneliness and isolation of both Tatooine itself, and Maul in particular.

And he is not, ah... taking Ezra's rejection or the long wanderings out in the desert well. To say the least.

From this first opening monologue we can already tell that Maul is fraying. He spent ten years in the depths of madness and it seems like he's descending into madness once again. Even his clothing reflects this, sandblasted and torn, a ragged hood recalling the one he wore at the beginning of Malachor as he feigned being weak and decrepit, and uneven wrappings circling his arms, asymmetrically.

His mood swings from "Visions and Voices" are more pronounced, one moment warbling pitifully about being lost, about being so close to his target, the next shrieking Obi-Wan's name skyward like an obscenity.

Obi-Wan has managed to elude him all this time since Dathomir, and Maul is beginning to get desperate.

RIGHT, SO THIS IS THE PART WHERE I GET BACK INTO MY BLUBBERING KENOBI SHOW FEELINGS BECAUSE "JEDI CANNOT HELP WHAT THEY ARE. THEIR COMPASSION LEAVES A TRAIL. THE JEDI CODE IS LIKE AN ITCH. [THEY] CANNOT HELP IT." AND SOB FOREVER ABOUT HOW WHOEVER IT WAS ON THE WRITING TEAM THAT CAME UP WITH THAT RAW-ASS LINE, THEY UNDERSTOOD THE ASSIGNMENT.

So not only is this a callback to the previous times Maul lured Obi-Wan out to him in TCW, this now also a call-forward to Kenobi and I just want y'all to appreciate for a moment that Maul is using the exact same tactic on two different Jedi, simultaneously.

Maul is luring Ezra and taking advantage of Ezra's compassion, hero complex, guilt complex, and sense of hyper-responsibility, in order to then exploit Obi-Wan's compassion and protector-guardian streak, so that he can kill Obi-Wan when Obi-Wan comes to Ezra's rescue.

Because that's what Jedi do, that's what Jedi are, the Jedi Code is like an itch they cannot help it--frick man, I'm already emotional and we're not even two minutes in.

A general overview of the music this episode, and I'll comment on specific cues as they happen, but I mostly want to point out the frequent lack of music, actually. This episode is very stripped down in terms of theme and instrumentation and there are long stretches of utter silence, to help us absorb the atmosphere. It's very effective in making Tatooine feel utterly desolate, like we're alone on this journey with the characters.

This episode had originally been very ambitious, we've been told from behind-the-scenes commentary, longer, more complex, a lot more plot points, but as it was coming together they very wisely pared it way down to the barebone tacks, cutting out all the excesses and stripping things down to a simple character journey narrative, making the resulting story that much more profound and intimate.

(Plus the saved budget allowed us to get some absolutely gorgeous animation and new pajamas for Ezra. XD)

He looks so comfy in them.

This sequence is heavily styled after the cold open in "Legacy", camera movement and shot choice almost exactly matching. This is not a coincidence, as the basic premise of both episodes is the same: Ezra receives a vision through the Force, and it moves him to action.

Unlike in "Legacy", however, when the Force itself was moving to comfort Ezra and connect him to the voices and images of his parents one last time before their death, this vision is artificially constructed, sent to him by Maul--like the ones in "Visions and Voices"--to deliberately manipulate him, pull him away from his support network, make him act out of fear.

A false Call To Action, in an artificial Hero's Journey narrative that Maul has constructed for Ezra to follow. (More on that later.)

Side note, completely unrelated to all this meta, but an observation I just want to point out: It's the middle of the night and Kanan is not in his room on the Ghost. Where exactly was he eh? Perhaps a certain Twi'lek pilot's room? *eyebrow waggle*

Anyway, after Ezra's Weird Force Tele-Distance Holocron Call we move to a scene that is a bit heavy in the exposition department, by virtue of it having to hold the burden of the extra plotlines they pared down. It's maybe not quite as effective as it could have been but it serves its purpose: It establishes that they identified the "desert planet with two suns" as Tatooine sometime offscreen, and that they asked about Obi-Wan and Bail Organa lied through his teeth about the man being dead. So therefore they must have decided to give the matter up, and let Maul chase ghosts in the Tatooine sands.

Rex being clearly distraught at Obi-Wan's assumed death. :(

Kanan also reminds Ezra that the last visions he got from and about Maul were a trick designed to manipulate him.

Ezra's insistent though, as he always tends to be whenever the notion of being able to obtain "the key to destroying the Sith" pops up. So Hera takes him aside for a moment.

Her face and how often she touches Ezra's arms and shoulders in this scene hurts. :( And the strain in her voice when she asserts that if Obi-Wan were alive he wouldn't be hiding in the desert, he'd be helping them, Hera understands Jedi nature too, she just hasn't gotten the full picture, doesn't know the reason why Obi-Wan is doing... well... exactly that.

This is where the story beat parallels to "Legacy" end, because this time, Ezra does not receive Hera's blessing to go. Instead she reminds him, rather sternly, that he is supposed to be there with them, planning the attack on Lothal, she needs him and his focus here.

Recall Yoda's line about Luke: "Never his mind on where he was. What he was doing." Since all the way back in Season Two, when his mere presence started to become a danger to the safety of his friends, Ezra has been growing more and more obsessed with finding a way to kill the Sith, whenever Maul turns up more distracted. It ties straight back into his motivation for becoming a Jedi in the first place that he told Yoda in "Path of the Jedi".

"I just want to protect myself and my friends. And not just them, everyone. I'll protect everyone."

Ezra has an abundance of that natural Jedi urge to protect (planted by his parents, nurtured by Hera), the itch inside him intermingles with his clingyness and attachment to his Ghost family in particular. When everything went wrong on Malachor he internalized that failure severely, and his natural Jedi compulsions went overdrive into a crippling sense of hyper-responsibility, magnified by his guilt and leading him down the same path Anakin walked--seeking more power, from dubious and deceitful sources, in order to prevent another personal tragedy from happening to him again.

His desire to protect got twisted into attachment, into a clingy possessiveness, into a fear of more potential loss. In this way his flirtations with the Dark Side mirrored Anakin's, though ultimately Ezra never went far enough that he wasn't able to come back, the disaster at Reklam and his reconciliation with Kanan enough of a kick in the head from the Force for him to be all, "NOPE, I REGRET EVERYTHING, I'M NOT DOING THAT AGAIN."

But even though Ezra came to his senses and rejected the Dark Side, he was still not on the right path. The aftereffects of Malachor remained and he kept letting that Sisyphean unattainable goal of defeating the Sith--himself, personally, or else personally enabling it to happen--pull him away. Kept letting it move him out of place in the narrative.

He was supposed to be here, Hera needed him here. "You're in the wrong place, Ezra Bridger," Obi-Wan tells him gently, later. Ezra lets Maul, lets his obsession with destroying the Sith, yank him out of order in the cosmic destiny of things.

The Force has a place for him. But it is here and not there.

But he kind of has to go on this perilous journey for it to finally kick in.

(One of the scenes I do kind of wish they had kept from the original extended plot is the one where Hera and Kanan and Zeb all kind of commiserate about how "the kids", meaning Ezra and Sabine, are growing up and leaving home, and how they have to let them go, even if they might make bad choices, really playing into that whole parental angle and explaining why they didn't immediately rush off after Ezra.)

Despite Ezra's half-hearted assurance to Hera, it's clear he has no intention of obeying her order to stay put. His sense of impulsive hyper-responsibility is too strong, he's following the same instincts that led him to obsess over and misinterpret his other two major Force visions.

So he swipes a training A-wing.

He's such a little shit I love him. <3

This is the point of no return and Ezra is unwittingly drawn into Maul's trap, which mimics the beats of a classic Campbell Hero's Journey.

Joseph Campbell, for reference, is a writer and philosopher who purported the idea of the monomyth, that in all stories and all mythologies across cultures there are similar patterns and cycles. His Hero's Journey is often styled as a closed circle ("It ends where it began."), with a dividing line between the Known and Unknown worlds and various stops and characters and plot elements mentioned along the sides. The Hero's Journey monomyth, incidentally, was one of George Lucas's major inspirations for writing Star Wars, wanting to create one such classic mythological narrative.

So we have all the elements in place here. We have the Call To Adventure (the distorted holocron message). We have the Refusal Of The Call (Hera ordering Ezra to stay and him initially not fighting her). We have the Supernatural Aid (the pieces of the holocron that function as some kind of magic compass). We've outmaneuvered the Threshold Guardian and crossed over into the Unknown (Ezra swiping the A-wing from under the technician's nose). Along the way we'll pick up the Ally or Helper (it's revealed Chopper snuck along and went with him). And we will be facing Trials, Tests, and Tribulations (everything from the initial Tusken attack to braving the harsh elements of Tatooine's unforgiving sand and heat).

...But it's all wrong.

See, Ezra has already answered the Call to his own Hero's Journey, the one that started for him all the way back in the pilot, when he returned Kanan's lightsaber and crossed the Threshold into the Unknown world of being a Rebel and a Jedi Padawan. This falsely constructed cycle Maul has drawn him into is not his narrative. It was never intended to bring him enlightenment, never intended to complete, only to be used to further Maul's selfish ends.

That Ezra manages to find enlightenment and complete the cycle anyway is something that happens in spite of Maul, and not because of him, and takes some severe course-correcting from Obi-Wan. Over and over this episode we'll hear this idea repeated, that this was not where Ezra was supposed to be in the story, it's not his job or responsibility to deal with Maul, he is where "[he] should never have been".

We'll table that for now and come back to it, have a moment to enjoy some pretty caps.

Thus far, music-wise, we've had a couple ominous cues, and a bouncy jaunt full of Rebellion flutes and brass as Ezra made his escape, in between a couple of the aforementioned long bouts of silence. There's a bubbly little bit when Chopper is discovered. (And I can't even tell you how much I love the touch with Ezra startling so bad he smacks the A-wing cockpit window and bumps the steering column so that the ship swerves out of place--PART OF THE METAPHOR MUCH?) Soft vocals filter in as Ezra consults the holocron shards, holding in long, mystical notes. A lone viola sounds, mournfully. Higher strings sound with spiritual reverence as Ezra gets out of the A-wing, as if to suggest his goal, his enlightenment, is just up ahead.

Then, darker notes like a pulsing heartbeat. The voices go discordant.

Then the Tuskens attack and hell breaks loose.

One of the underlying threads this episode is Ezra and Chopper's devotion and loyalty to each other so I really like how, even though Ezra told him to find cover, Chopper doesn't and charges in to get a Tusken off Ezra instead. Ezra in turn shields him with his own body when the Tuskens score hits that make the A-wing explode.

And that's Ezra's, "I'm in so much trouble." look lol.

Maul, meanwhile, decides to go ahead and murder all the Tuskens and I would not fault you for thinking back to another lightsaber-fueled Tusken massacre.

In fact, probably any parallel or allusion you think of during this episode is in all likelihood deliberate. Frankly I'd argue that this is one of the most important episodes of the show, with how integral it is to Ezra's character arc.

Which is why it was so annoying and asinine that people complained that Ezra took up most of the episode's focus and whined that it should have been only about Maul. Hello, do you understand the concept of a protagonist?!

Speaking of allusions though, we get some lovely call backs to "Visions And Voices" with Maul once again letting Ezra hear him inside his head and catch fleeting glimpses of him, this time in order to lure him further out into the desert. Maul is still trying to keep him in the false cycle, tempting him away from escape.

And Ezra's sense of hyper-responsibility, of This is all my fault and I have to fix it, leads him right down Maul's preordained path.

"I have to help Master Kenobi, if I can." As if Obi-Wan needs any help dealing with Maul, ha ha.

Another moment of pure heartwarming loyalty from Chopper here, he has the opportunity to keep going along the path to safety, but begrudgingly chooses instead to stay with Ezra, through thick and thin.

Ezra once again returns the favor by refusing to leave his side when he runs out of power.

Subtle animation appreciation moment: The way Ezra staggers, looking completely exhausted. Also the sandblasting in his hair and clothes kjhfkasjfha.

Taylor's acting here is heartbreaking, he makes Ezra sound SO lost and scared. :(((((((

Maul decides to rub things in a bit and oh hey some mirror dialogue here, eerily similar to a certain exchange in "Gathering Forces". :D

Grand Inquisitor: The Darkness is too strong for you, orphan. It'll swallow you up even now. Ezra: No. Grand Inquisitor: Your master will die. Ezra: No! Grand Inquisitor: Your friends will die, and everything you've hoped for will be lost. This is the way the story ends. Ezra: NO!

And in comparison:

Maul: He is dead... He is dead. Ezra: No... Maul: You led me to him. Ezra: No. Maul: You failed your friends. Ezra: No! Maul: You will DIE!" Ezra: NOOOO!

~It's like poetry, it rhymes.~

Also this is terrifying.

So I've legitimately teared up like... twice watching this show. This was one of the times. This moment right here where Obi-Wan's feet step softly into frame.

Yeah it got me.

Cut to... Night. A quiet campfire. Ezra comes to and things are suddenly put into perspective.

"You're in the wrong place, Ezra Bridger."

(The voice they got for Obi-Wan is perfect btw, sounds just like Alec Guinness.)

Obi-Wan explains gently that he is not "the key to defeating the Sith". He never was. Maul's desires muddied the holocron vision, he used Ezra to get his own answers and left Ezra with only partial answers. Because Obi-Wan is associated with the key to defeating the Sith but he's not the Chosen One.

And neither is Ezra.

He is a narrative "chosen one", a key player picked by the Force, imbued with purpose, but defeating Vader, killing the Emperor... that was never his task to take. After the loss he suffered in "Legacy" Ezra had been letting himself get obsessed with the idea that he could fix that problem--the problem of the Sith--himself.

But that is not his role in the story.

It is not yet sunrise (Luke and Leia). So the moon (Ezra) must endure.

"You win by killing an Inquisitor." "No, you win by surviving."

Ever since before Malachor, Ezra has been stepping outside his station, trying to do things he was never meant to do, instead of what he was supposed to do, which was to help the people in front of him, right now, do what good he can in the moment. (Something that he'd gain clarity on via a falling out with Saw in Season Four.)

"What you need, you already have."

Ezra lost sight of that in the grief over his parents, in his guilt over Malachor. He was never going to be the one to defeat the Sith. Yoda and Obi-Wan both knew the only ones who even stood a chance... would be Vader's children. Maybe Ahsoka. Perhaps that was even why Yoda advised going to Malachor, to test and see if Vader could be saved, or killed, by his former padawan. Someone who he might have had a strong enough attachment to that it would cloud his judgement. (Just as Obi-Wan's mere presence would drive Vader mad with irrational murderous rage and yet, paradoxically, a cloying need to have him back.)

"We asked for a chance to destroy the Sith... and we failed."

Vader has no connection to Ezra, therefore Ezra will not be the one to end him.

His task is to endure, keep the darkness back, and hold the line until the narrative chosen one who will do that task (Luke) is ready to take up the sword. This is not Ezra's role in the story. He has his own destiny, his own part to play in the Rebellion.

And he needs to return to it.

Obi-Wan closes the broken cycle for Ezra, rescuing him from The Ordeal or Abyss, and sending him back to the Known world with the Boon (his sage wisdom) irregardless of how false the path there to him was. Ezra is freed from the obligations, responsibilities, and burdens he wrongly took on himself... to return home, and rejoin his own Hero Cycle.

And then all that's left is to "mend this old wound". (Maul)

Maul has what he wanted, or so he thinks. His old enemy, his past, ready for the killing. His future and legacy, his apprentice, within reach for taking.

But things have changed. Obi-Wan is older, wiser, more serene and at peace with himself and with the Force, in spite of all he's suffered. He has grown from his failures, let go of the past, and found balance, while Maul has regressed, repeated the same mistakes, clung to the hurt and pain in his past and deteriorated, been sucked almost dry by the Dark Side.

And Obi-Wan pities him.

Maul is scalded by this, upset that after everything he's endured, Obi-Wan seems to have taken no ill effect. And it's not like Order 66 and Anakin's betrayal didn't hurt him (hell we have all of the Kenobi show to demonstrate otherwise) but that he's processed those emotions and feelings and traumas, and returned to a settled baseline. He is more a Jedi now than ever, and revenge is not the Jedi way.

And can I flail a little bit inarticulately for a moment about the dichotomy between Obi-Wan's "I had no intention of fighting him, though that seems inevitable now." and Thrawn's "It was not my intention to utterly destroy Lothal but that is inevitable now."?

So Maul digs for something to bait Obi-Wan with, touching about the reason he's there on Tatooine to begin with, discerning that there is someone that Obi-Wan is protecting. Notes of Sith vocals creep into the music here, a sequence that sounds like Maul's arrival on Tatooine from Phantom Menace ("It ends where it began.").

And with this implicit threat towards Luke, Obi-Wan ignites his saber.

SO much ink has been spilled about this duel. I was surprised at how short it was at first too, but it makes perfect thematic sense in hindsight. The way Obi-Wan slowly baits Maul, drawing Maul's mental frame of mind back to Naboo, because he knows that Maul is stuck in the past, constantly reliving that moment of triumph and defeat over and over again, fixated on it as the shatterpoint where things in his life first went wrong. He can't let it go. He can't move on. He has to keep going back to that moment over and over to make things "correct" and kill the one he pins the blame on for his pain. (But this will not fix him, even if he accomplishes it.)

An entire story is told solely through foot placement and stances. Maul moves through the stances he's used in duels with Obi-Wan before. Obi-Wan shifts through his classic New Hope lightsaber grip, to his iconic Soresu.

And then he switches to Ataru, to the same stance Qui-Gon used.

The music has been tense throughout, but now the Force Theme creeps in. There's a flare of recognition in Maul's eyes; He knows this, this is familiar.

So he lunges, using the same lightsaber trick that he used to kill Qui-Gon...

...except it doesn't work.

I love the look of quiet realization and acceptance in Maul's expression. It's just like, "......Oh."

Maul submits and falls in defeat, into his enemy's arms, yet another parallel to Phantom Menace, to the start of everything between these two men. And then he asks something heartbreaking: Is Obi-Wan protecting the Chosen One? The one who would defeat the Sith?

And because Obi-Wan no longer believes that Vader can be saved, he answers yes. (Amazing how well this scene fits with the later Kenobi show.)

With his dying breath, Maul finally recognizes his true enemy, accepts and forgives Obi-Wan as his brother, as a fellow victim of Palpatine, and declares with almost prophetic insight, "He... will avenge us."

Not take revenge, avenge. As Trilla Sundari would admonish Cal Kestis in the Jedi Fallen Order video game, Maul also asks for restitution and justice with his last words.

(I do kind of wish we got one brief reaction shot from Ezra as he sensed Maul passing, just for confirmation that he knows. It's inferred but still.)

Back with Ezra as he returns home with the Boon, and he's also claimed the prize of Maul's ship, the Mandalorian gauntlet. (Again, just the briefest scene of him finding it, that would have been nice.)

"I was wrong. This is where I'm supposed to be. You're my family. And we should go home."

Ezra has finally forgiven himself for Malachor, completed the arc he started in "Legacy" (or maybe even earlier), and returned to his proper place. His family accepts him back with the laying of hands like a benediction.

And meanwhile, just to wring your heart one last time, we return to Tatooine, to watch Obi-Wan watch over Luke from a distance, a scene drenched in OT nostalgia, from using the exact audio of Aunt Beru calling Luke to closing us out with Luke's Theme and Binary Sunset for the credits, reminding us that the shadow will not hold sway forever.

Eventually, the sun will rise. And a new hope will emerge.

Trust in the Force.

Man, there aren't enough words to tell you how much I love this episode. It's so beautiful and poetic and thematic. It's the lynchpin of Ezra's character development, he needed to be in this episode, to go on this journey. It's gorgeously animated and there are so many many layers of parallels and themes, motifs and archetypes, that tie into the monomyth in general and Star Wars in particular. I'm astonished how well it melds with later canon material (JFO and Kenobi), but I guess that just speaks to how true to the spirit and essence of Star Wars it is.

It's just beautiful.

[genomynt]

Hello there, I recently took an interest into Niji X Cosette duo to fan art. But I still have mix feeling about it because of the canon but they are kinda cute together. So how do you deal with your feelings towards this ship?

Also, before you saw their fan art. What’s your opinion of these two when you first saw their interaction in manga/anime?

Hey there anon bud!! 🥰🫶🏼

FIRST ...I sincerely apologize for the late reply 🤦🏻‍♀️ it's been AGES since I've opened this app 😭

That's a good question 👀 and apparently, it's a FAQ for me, given the fact I've been rambling about them for 6 years and counting 👀💀

TBH with you anon, it all started back in 2017-2018 when I rewatched and reread OP again after hearing Sanji's getting married to Pudding in WCI 👀 I stopped because I was in highschool and getting ready to review for college entrance exams that time.💀So I need to take a break from long-running animes and focus for my exams.

I tried to keep up with both the manga and the anime, and apparently, my TL on twitter back then passed a NijiCose fanart and got spoiled before reaching the actual episode 800-802💀😭 that fanart was from @ovaCkuyuri... Here's a pixiv log of the said NijiCose fanarts:

At first I already knew they're problematic based on how they're interpreted on the fanarts (like Niji being a Tsundere to Cosette, and her acting nervous and flustered around him). But as I continued to watch and reread the manga... I noticed something interesting as well on Niji's character on manga that was documented on his profile page in OP wiki:

So far, he has the most "redeeming qualities from his modified brothers 👀 I know it says that his values totally contrast against Sanji, but I still have hopes for him.

In the series tho, I wish for a closure and reconciliation for both Niji and Cosette once the Vinsmoke siblings' modifications have been reversed. I want Niji to genuinely apologize to her and pay her back for everything.

Also, to answer your question how do I deal with this ship, I simply view them as problematic and angsty, yet a redeemable ship.

For sure, Cosette is traumatized deeply from Niji, and for sure she's totally aware of the modification story of the Vinsmoke siblings when she was hired in Germa. She knows what she's getting into when she was hired as their Royal Head Chef. Hopefully we got some backstory of how she got there in the first place 👀

I always daydream of them getting slowburned from Niji's existential crisis as humanity regains from his senses as he feels horribly guilty about his wrong doings as a warmonger, not just to Cosette; and Cosette knowing that he's not born to be evil in the first place, tolerating and slowly tries to understand him.

Disclaimer: I don't and NEVER patronize abuse and Domestic violence IRL.

NijiCose is fiction. One Piece is fiction. My condolences if you can't separate your views from fiction to reality.

‼️Feel free to block this account if you're uncomfortable with my ships.

Addendum:

I recently sent an SBS letter to Oda about some origins of Cosette like how she got there working under Germa.👀 Hopefully that would be answered and clear some things up

[absolutebl]

My Top 60 BLs - The Elite 10% of 600 Watched

It's happened again, another year, another 100 BLs watched. We have just tipped the BL tracking spreadsheet over into 600 BLs watched. (by moi).

SO after watching 600 BLs, here are my top 60:

Seven Days - Japan 2015 (oldest BL on this list, also holds #1 spot, cute)

We Best Love: No. 1 For You & Fighting Mr. 2nd - Taiwan 2021

Semantic Error - Korea 2022

Light On Me - Korea 2021

Until We Meet Again - Thai 2019

Our Dating Sim - Korea 2023

To My Star - Korea 2021

Color Rush 1 - Korea 2021

Old Fashion Cupcake - Japan 2022

Takara-kun and Amagi-kun - Japan 2022

Minato’s Laundromat - Japan 2022

My Beautiful Man - Japan 2021

Cherry Blossoms After Winter - Korea 2022

HIStory 2: Crossing the Line - Taiwan 2018

Cherry Magic - Japan 2020

The Eighth Sense - Korea 2023

Bad Buddy - Thai 2022

A Tale of Thousand Stars - Thai 2021

My School President - Thai 2023

Love Tractor - Korea 2023

The New Employee - Korea 2023

Oxygen - Thai 2020

Be Loved In House: I Do - Taiwan 2021

Lovely Writer - Thai 2021

He’s Coming to Me - Thai 2019

Blueming - Korea 2022

Unintentional Love Story - Korea 2023

Step By Step - Thai 2023

My Ride - Thai 2022

La Pluie - Thai 2023

Wish You - Korea 2020

Our Dining Table AKA Bokura no Shokutaku - Japan 2023

Not Me - Thai 2022

Nobleman Ryu’s Wedding - Korea 2021

Love By Chance - Thai 2018

See You After Quarantine? - Taiwan 2021

Addicted - China 2016

Long Time No See - Korea 2017

My Tooth Your Love - Taiwan 2022

Why R U? - Thai 2020

The Tasty Florida - Korea 2021

About Youth - Taiwan 2022

SOTUS - Thai 2016

DNA Says Love You - Taiwan 2022

My Love Mix Up - Japan 2021

Roommates of Poongduck 304 - Korea 2022

The Eclipse - Thai 2022

Dark Blue Kiss - Thai 2019

Oh! Boarding House - Korea 2022

My Day - Pinoy 2020

Ocean Likes Me - Korea 2022

Bed Friend - Thai 2023

Cutie Pie - Thai 2022

Life: Love on the Line - Japan 2020

Love Class - Korea 2022

Restart After Come Back Home - Japan 2020

Tinted With You - Korea 2022

2gether - Thai 2020

Choco Milk Shake - Korea 2022

Destiny Seeker - Thai 2023

600 BLs - My Top 60 Notes

Bold = 10/10 (#1 … #8)

Italics = 9/10 (#9 … #33)

everything else is 8/10 (there are more 8/10s)

These are my personal preferences. If you don't see one of your favorites there it may still have scored an 8 just not made it onto the list.

Or... I didn't like is as much as you think I should.

Relative ranking isn't fixed. I basically just asked myself which ones would I want to rewatch right... now.

Absolute BL not included because it’s parody

Love is Science? & Puppy Honey not included because BL is a B-plot

Word of Honor has been censored off the list. Fuck that noise.

The following are my top 3 shorts:

A First Love Story - Korea 2021

Just Friends? - Korea 2009 (would have been the oldest on the list)

Some More - Korea 2018

This is as of the Aug 2023.

Not responsible for any additional awesome BLs that have aired since then.

Next up... 700 BLs. Expect me to do this again - next year. Unless I'm dead of course.

(Here's the last time I did this.)

[unloneliest]

i just rewatched the king george job for the first time since my original leverage watch in 2017 and i'm having like a physical reaction to hardison calling eliot "e" again in front of my own two eyes. they're so in love and hardison trusts him so, so much. top 10 photos taken moments before a disaster. i'm experiencing symptoms i feel SICK