#i just got past book 3
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Yuu: well I think you'll get it someday
Jamil: get what?
Yuu: love, silly!
Jamil: well what if I don't want a partner?
Yuu: love comes in all shapes, sizes, and forms, Jamil. Self love being one of them. It's tough to get at, that's for certain. But . . . It's real nice to have once you have it. Don't ya think?
#twisted wonderland#twst yuu#twst jamil#i just got past book 3#and unfortunately#i accidentally gor spoilers for certain things about the bby#and god i love him
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So basically ATLA brain rot has hit me like a truck
#atla#avatar the last airbender#zuko#toph beifong#what happened was I was forced to watch the live action#which is actually pretty good if you get past the first few episodes#and if you don’t have someone in your ear telling you it’s awful the whole time#first episode is definitely the weakest and that’s 50% gran gran’s fault#aang and katara are also pretty flat but whatever#sokka’s good and zuko’s fantastic actually#they did goof on a few things but overall I think it’s a fun time#just don’t expect it to be as good as the cartoon and you’ll be okay#ANYWAY it got me missing toph#so i rewatched the blind bandit episode#and then wound up watching the entirety of books 2 & 3 in a few days#and now I’m brain rotted#which is especially weird considering when I first watched it I was like#yeah that was good! and then never thought about it again#i dunno what changed but i need help it’s taking over my life#wanted to draw Sokka too but he looks hard to draw#and i had enough trouble with these two#maybe someday#sorry for rambling in the tags goodbye
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You know what I love about Binghe's character? His role in the story and the way it changes our perception of him through the narrative.
We first meet him as this poor boy and we, just like Shen Qingqiu, get swept by the image of the white lotus. He's a teenager, and we're told that at this age he didn't have any of the darkness that would reign over his life after the Abyss. We're only shown an obedient and sweet Luo Binghe. He is the "young and innocent protagonist".
But we know about his future. Shen Qingqiu tells us so many times that the Abyss will corrupt him irreversebly, that he will come back and take his revenge on the scum villain. The problem is that we see the story through Shen Qingqiu's point of view, he is our protagonist, making Binghe our villain. So we read about the disciple days with the constant thought that this boy will one day become the antagonist.
And see, there's a slight difference between villain and antagonist. A villain is perceived as someone with bad intentions, while an antagonist is just someone who opposes the protagonist.
When Luo Binghe comes back from the Abyss, he is both villain and antagonist. He goes against Shen Qingqiu (antagonist), and the story tells us he wants to kill him like the original PIDW (villain).
Then it's revealed that it may not be exactly like that. First, we're shown that Binghe has romantic feelings for Shen Qingqiu (which, yeah, it's obvious to everyone but him, but still), giving Binghe a new possible role in the story: love interest. This immediately reduces the perceived danger of his actions. It brings him closer, it makes him a safer character.
Yes, there are stories with villainous love interests that do horrible shit, but we're dealing with the most common way narratives treat this type of character: generally, the love interest is good. And so, the moment this role is put upon Luo Binghe by the narrative itself, it also influences the reader.
But Shen Qingqiu, and consequently we, don't lower our guard. Despite being the love interest now, we also know that Luo Binghe has conspired to take down his master and organized the sower plague. He's attacked Huan Hua Palace, killed Gongyi Xiao and many others, putting the blame on Shen Qingqiu. By the end of book 2 he's villain, antagonist and love interest.
But it all gets proven wrong. That almost everything that happened to Shen Qingqiu was not because of Luo Binghe. We discover that there are other villains in the shadows.
The sower plague and the the attack at Huan Hua Palace was caused by Tianlang-Jun and Zhuzhi-Lang. Qiu Haitang's involvement and Shen Qingqiu's imprisonment was one of the Old Palace Master's schemes. All of this destroys Binghe's role as villain and antagonist.
This is the moment Shen Qingqiu decides to trust Binghe, pushing the reader to do the same. Because he's just "love interest" now and by the standard conventions, he's good. We trust him to be. Shen Qingqiu himself starts to project onto him that same image of white lotus. Since our image of Luo Binghe was so bad previously, this makes it jump way higher. It lulls us into this much better perception of his character.
The Old Palace Master was a villain and he died, as villains are often destined to. The only obstacle remains Tianlang-Jun, who doesn't harm Shen Qingqiu because of Zhuzhi-Lang's wishes (not an antagonist), but also wants to merge the realms (villain).
So our protagonist and love interest move toward the action, the big battle against the final boss. The villains get defeated easily and after the truth of what happened to Su Xiyan, Tianlang-Jun gives up his plan. His role as villain ends there. But the story has more antagonists to reveal.
Luo Binghe has never stopped being one. The narrative only hid his real motivations and let him cover himself with the role of love interest. And at this moment, he drops the mask and lets all of his feelings out, everything he didn't tell Shen Qingqiu nor the readers. He becomes the final antagonist, the one we've had since the very beginning.
The thing that saves him is his status as love interest, because no, he's not the only one to blame for what is happening. There's Xin Mo, who has fed on his insecurities and negative feelings, and Shen Qingqiu himself. He is the one who has constantly pushed Binghe to the side, believing himself to do the right thing, first by giving Binghe his death and then by trying to keep him "protected" from his father.
In the end, Luo Binghe wasn't a villain. Shen Qingqiu was, and he dies. But since he's not a real villain, he's allowed to come back.
When everything is over, their story comes to an end. The narrative itself leaves them free, to be whoever they want to be.
#the first time we got to the final battle and lbh revealed he was the one to actually control xin mo#i got chills#it was so unexpected#but i also felt vindicated#because for all of book 3 there is this suspense around lbh's character#it feels like something is missing#despite sqq and lbh's relationship being much better after the events of the mausoleum there is something unsaid there#and it leaves the reader with this sense of non closure#but we don't have the time to dwell on it#because the whole thing with tlj is going down#(and the reveals of sxy and tlj's relationship plus sj's past)#until we come to the finale and lbh is the final antagonist#and that's when everything finally comes into place#svsss#why do i have to write my uni thesis#can't i just spend all my days thinking of svsss#scum villain#scum villain's self saving system#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#bingqiu
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PLEASE MORE BUTTERFLY HOWDY CONTENT HES SO FUCKING SILLY
OKAY HERE'S A COMIC SHENANIGANS THING
#this looks best if you click through instead of scrolling#which is kind of stupid to say After The Post. but yk.#spent way too long on this. worth it tho#its always worth it For The Bit#and this was good practice! ty for the opportunity!#the version of butterfly!howdy i have in my head is. hes a lot. i love him <3#scribble salad#welcome home#welcome home puppet show#howdy pillar#yassified howdy <3#i am so so so soooo tempted to make a butterfly howdy tag just to compile it all#i love compiling things. i like having specific collections In One Uninterrupted Place#alright well my hand hurts and its 5 am so im gonna queue this and go sleepies#wait fuck whats in the queue for tomorrow. today.#hm... ok this is a sunday post then. tomorrow is Booked#yall get a brief break from the butterfly howdy shenanigans#*got. im speaking to future people from the past rn. wild. ty tumblr for allowing time travel#its a tangled mess of yarn anyways#i am once again So Tempted To Write For This#perhaps one day i will fulfill my dream of writing a fic about howdy chrysalizing. metamorphosizing. whatever#id make it slowburn laughingstock perhaps... Probably.... i care them too much not too....#something for future me to enjoy! as a treat <3
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This scene has been living in my head rent-free, it was such a powerful moment! "I will give you everything I own and more. I would give you my life."🥺
I haven't played the other RO routes yet, so I've been wondering, how does it go for them? Are they all using their unique abilities to get through the crowd? Or does it go similarly?
Because this scene made me think we finally got a glimpse at Nate's tier X abilities. I highlighted some parts: the crowd parting without noticing, placing his hand on the supernatural's shoulder, his tone like molten gold and looking pale afterwards...
...And now I'm back to thinking about the whole Queen's Sabre massacre and how Nate is clearly feeling guilty about his past, yet he was judged as not guilty by Falk. Ugh, how I wish we found out more about his past! I do have my theories but I so want to hear it from him, especially since it's clear how much this is eating him up... He's so afraid to open up to MC!
In any case, I loved seeing Nate's other side in this book! (And I don't mean his horny side now, even though that was a treat too😏) He has always been as careful as possible when fighting their enemies but in book 3, there are plenty of instances where he loses his control because MC is in danger. It's clear how much he's been holding back.
The first time I read the auction scene, I got goosebumps when he showed up, seeing him in such power and control!🔥 And I have a feeling this is still far from his full abilities...
Either way, I would love to hear your thoughts and any inputs about how Adam/Mason/Felix scene looks like!
#I just need to talk about this#excuse the long post but i have too many thoughts and feels#if any of you have screenshots of the other routes please let me know#because I'm way too curious about everything when it comes to N I wish we got more inisghts into Nate's past too#nate sewell#n sewell#unit bravo#wayhaven#nathaniel sewell#the wayhaven chronicles#twc book 3#twc book 3 spoilers#tier x#a du mortain#specialist agent m#f hauville
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hi kairo :333 he loves you i love you i hope you’re doing well …. !!!! napping and eating tasty food and drinking lots of water and going on walks !!!!!!!
here is a treat and a drink that suguru made for u :33 ily always 🍵🍪
ARI MY ULTIMATE BELOVED HIIIIIIII BESTIEEEEEE :3 HOW ARE YOU MY LOVE HOW’RE YOU FEELING i hope you feel a bit more refreshed & rejuvenated bc you deserve it!!! AND HEHEHEHE am doing most of those things except the walking omg let me add daily walks back into my routine actually…….. will walk & get boba soon you just Opened my third eye rn <333
TY FOR THE TREAT & THE SUGU I’M CHOMPING ON THEM BOTH RARFJFJDJGHHARGSH (sounds of me eating) HERE’S SOME TREATS & A SUGU FOR YOU AS WELL HEHEHEHE 🍱🍡🍵 ILYSMMMMM 🙂↕️🫶🏼
#asks#ari tag <3#I HAVE ALL YOUR FICS SAVED BTW i wasn’t on yesterday that much but then i saw you came out w another fic BLESS UP 🫡🙏🏼#i’m so sorry i’m SO behind on my fic rb’s omfg see this is why i can’t have a tbr i’m the type who needs to rb when i see it immediately#JUST KNOW. THIS WEEK/WEEKEND I’M FOR SURE RB’ING!!!!!! (i’ve said that for the past few weeks but i Mean it this time)#ALSOOOOOOOO HOW’RE YOU MY LOOOOOOOOOVE#i hope summer is so pretty where you are and i hope you get to eat all the delicious food and see all the pretty beaches <3#and go shopping for books or cute clothes ofc <333#MWAHHHHHHHHH#still can’t believe we got canon black-nail polished sugu btw… we Manifested That#ANYWAYS HEHEHEHE ILYSMMMMM ARI MWAH MWAH MWAHHHHHHHH <333
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It's been a little over a month since I read FTB and I wanted to do (and say, I think) a few things related to it. So here, take this. FTB stuff I was wanting to share.
Including some drawings/my designs for some characters (the ones above), some separate sketches, and giving some long thoughts on the book. (This post is looong so I'm going to put everything under the curtain. Enjoy!)
Starting: Rose, Evan and Archie. They are the ones that, I admit, are what I wanted to draw/design most while/after I read the book. Now, at least, if I want to make something involving one of these three one day, I have designs ready to go! Hooray! Evan is the only one of the three that I actually had to design from scratch. With Rose I had made a sketch 1 year ago conceptualizing the idea for her design, and it was only recently that I came back to this idea to finally solidify it. And I had already done Archie's design last year while I was doing my designs for the human cast of BATDR, so I was already prepared without even knowing it.
Also,Ink!Archie!! The poor guy got screwed pretty badly. First two designs in the first image are based on the events in the book. The one on the left is him seen mostly in the book (alive) and the one on the right is when he is in the Ink Realm, post-death. The design in the second image was supposed to be a stylization/variation of his Cycle design. I tried drawing him with a visible mouth/teeth similar to what I did with Sammy in a recent drawing and in some sketches that I didn't post here. I'm not sure about the beard tho. I think I exaggerated it. Next time, remember to draw less beard in this design. (And maybe, for the design that is more "close to canon", don't draw the ends of the hair and beard in the Cycle design)
Any other character in the book, either I don't have a design and I don't plan on making a design for them now, or I do but it will take a while to show them. (I promise I'll show Dot one day)
I also have some additional sketches. So if you want to take a look at that too, here it is:
Ollie Sorenson. This wasn't quite the way I had imagined him when I was reading the book but 1. the hair I tried to draw for him before didn't work out well, so I went another route and 2. Ollie isn't particularly a character in this book that I'm going to I think a lot in comparison to the others (he's still cool, tho) and I doubt I'll make another design for him, so let's go with this one. Not a bad design,so,eh.
Rose. Sketch on the left was made last year. I'm almost certain it was done after the book synopsis was revealed by Kress. The sketch on the right was made last month when I was reading the book. I took the idea from the sketch on the left and tried to solidify her design better.
Evan. Some other sketches made when I read the book. I had just completed his design and wanted to test it a little more to, you know, see if I can actually draw him. Verdict? I think I can.
And now uhhhhhh what I thought of the book! I previously considered doing a separate text post with these thoughts only but I don't do text-only posts in general and if I were to make a separate post it would take a while and it would come out more than 1 month/probably 2 months since I read the book and it would be kinda awkward. And I'm already writing this post, so why not put it all here now, right?
(Warning: My thoughts on the book ended up being MUCH LONGER THAN I EXPECTED TO WRITE. You don't need to read them if you want, they are just more additional and optional things. But if you are going to read them, be warned)
(Spoilers: I may have strayed a little off topic when I started talking about Archie. Don't mention how long his paragraph is, tho)
But yeah, Fade To Black. That was something else, I tell you (and I mean that in a positive way). Probably reading this book after all the fuss that happened about the books a while ago wasn't the best idea possible. But even with…all that in mind, I still wanted to read this for a long time, and I'm glad I went ahead with it. I had a lot of fun with the book! And thinking about it a little over a month after finishing it, I think I can say that this book is up there as, like, one of my favorites of the Bendy books that have been released to date. Before this, I would have considered DCTL my favorite of the books, so I'm somewhere between saying that both of these two are my favorite books in this series and that I like them equally, or that FTB has now become my favorite book of the series, surpassing DCTL. (Maybe I'll have a better idea of this later this year when I reread these books once again)
I really liked the story told, its concept had already interested me since its synopsis was revealed last year - the setting in the 50's, the TV show, the whole 3D glasses thing - so it's no surprise that I was very interested in what this book had to tell. And since I already brought that up: I liked the new concepts it brings to the table,specifically,of course,the glasses and the TV. An idea that,I admit,at first is something I thought was a bit different (and dare i say unusual?) from what I usually see in the Bendy universe (although, it's not something so out of the ordinary from what we've seen before in the series) but I have to say that it's something that I thought was cool even so. 3D glasses that end up transporting your mind into the televised cartoons (and,by all accounts,the ink realm). The jokes I saw that Joey created virtual reality in this book weren't so far-fetched after all lol. But still, it's a concept that I admit to having been interested in, and that it might be cool to play around with in fanon stuff. I also considered this could open doors for other, more "wild" ideas to be explored in the books (as long as they still make sense for a >Bendy< book, of course). I also liked the whole segment taking place in the ink realm at the end of the book, and I hope that this can open up possibilities for future novel stories to take place there, either partially (as in this one) or in full (I accept an entire novel taking place in the cycle,ngl). The additional lore for the ink realm is a nice treat and adds more to what we have in the games. I admit that, at the same time, I feel a little thoughtful about a certain part of this additional lore that - assuming the way I understand it is right - leaves me wondering if this "extended origin" of the cycle coupled with what we already know of its lore would make sense in the games, and how these ideias would be acknowledged in future entries. But at the same time, I may be overthinking this, and the stars may still be aligned, and I've gotten the information wrong. Despite everything, I liked what was told about the ink realm in this book, I appreciate this "extended origin" at the end of the day.
I really liked the cast, both the new ones and the old faces. Rose is great, I really liked her as the protagonist. She's already one of my favorite book characters, I hope we hear from her again in the future. Also, it's good to have a protagonist in these books who survives in the end. Okay, sure, she didn't come out of it 100% unharmed, considering what the ending implies, but still. Again. It's good to have a protagonist in these books who came out of this alive at the end. Evan is also very good. Even though I want to slap him on the back of the head, I also hope to hear from him again, especially considering the way he "exited the story" (is that how you say it?). I talked about the possibility of a future novel taking place in the ink realm, I think that would give a good chance of bringing him back, now as an ink creature. I don't have much to say about Ollie, but I also thought he was cool. The scenes between him and Rose are very nice and the scenes related to the "Bendy Visions" caused by the glasses is another concept that I found very interesting (Tense moments, but cool ones nonetheless) Very happy to see Dot again. I like her character, and I always wanted to see what happened to her after the events of DCTL (TLO had already implied that she was still alive, but I wanted to know more, you know). Her participation in this book is very good, and a chapter that I have to highlight is the one where she meets Rose and they talk in the cafe. Their conversation alone is very good, but the specific part that got me was Dot talking about Buddy, what happened to her after the first book, and Buddy's family. That part was like. A slap in the heart, I'm not going to lie. This chapter made me sad, 10/10. Favorite chapter of the book.
Archie Carter was a big surprise (not really, I already knew he would be here before reading the book), and he is another of my favorite aspects of the book. It's good to see one of the characters from BATDR's human cast ending up being used more in a story. Archie in the game, like other characters we saw in the audio logs in DR, is a "One and done" situation where we only hear from him once and that's it, combined with the fact that he is ultimately just another background character who exists mostly to fill the world and give information that is not necessarily integral to the main things that occur in the game and is more to tell about different things, people and events that were also occurring inside the studio and in the outside world ( those of the lost city and Gent Workshop, essentially) pre-game events. (I really don't know how to explain this properly, but I would say that the "thing" of the information given by the new human cast (with the exception of the Archs) is the same thing as the characters who are giving such information: filling the world. I hope you get the gist of what I'm saying) And while I wouldn't say the information on these tapes is really irrelevant (in Archie's case, he provides some of the most interesting), and in my case, I don't mind the addition of the newbies, I don't blame other people for not being interested, don't get attached to or even dislike these new characters who don't do much in the grand scheme of things in DR and in comparison to the BATIM cast (or at least, the majority of the IM cast). So seeing at least 1 of these newcomers being used more deeply in a story and having their characters expanded is good! And I liked what was done with Archie here. You know the guy who worked at Gent as a test subject and who saw bad things happening at the company? Guess what! Same company screwed up his life and now he's a half-human-half-ink creature guy infected with evil ink and his current situation is not good at all! He's going through horrors unfortunately (especially in the cycle), but I really like what Adrienne did with Archie in this book. Again, he is one of the highlights of this book, and I hope that something similar ends up happening with other DR characters in future stories (manifesting the novel that uses Bill Danton and/or Grace Conway in some capacity 🙌) Plus, I also think it's cool that of all the DR characters to be used, it was the one voiced by SuperHorrorBro who ended up being chosen for this book (I like SHB, what can I say)
Joey (like in the other books) is a standout (and considering what we specifically see of him in this book, he's especially a standout here). More of Allison, even though in the end it's just a small one-scene cameo. Finally, I'm being fed the bread crumbs I craved. And I think now I have another version of Henry to talk about. My collection is growing strong, now I have 3 versions of my favorite old man! Among the new ones, and especially the secondary and tertiary ones, Papa D and Gladys are nice, even though they don't have much time in the story. Oh, and Wilson showed up too. He doesn't do much either, he's just there to be creepy. But I will acknowledge him.
I also enjoyed seeing some of the ideias showcased first in BATDR here (which makes sense, this book came out well after the game finally released). I always found it interesting to see more of Gent in the spotlight, and reading and knowing a little more about the things they were doing after JDS closed is nice. (And I think it's good to see more reaffirmation of what BATDR had already implied. That Gent also had eyes on the Ink Machine even when the studio was still open, and when the studio collapsed, they still continued the ink experiments in their own facilities. Again, this was already something that had been shown in DR, but it's good to see more reaffirmation here) The appearance of the Siverlane Express was something that I really appreciated, even if it was something very short. I ealready talk about Archie in one giant paragraph, and again, Wilson is here too.
There isn't really anything I "disliked" about this book, but at most, I only have a few nitpicks. The Ink Demon appears in the story, but compared to DCTL and TLO, I feel FTB is definitely the book where he appears the least. I mean, yeah, the story isn't about him in the end, but it's still something I managed to notice. I also feel that, in my opinion, this is the least "scary" of the 3. Not that it doesn't have "scary" elements but still, compared to moments in the other books like Buddy in the infirmary, or the TLO trio in the old factory, I don't know if this book would be the most "scary" of the trilogy. However,FTB still has several suspenseful scenes (the Bendy visions, some scenes with Ollie, Archie's pre-introduction, Wilson in the library), which I also like anyway. And I'll admit. While this idea isn't that far out there - and in the context of the story, it makes sense - I kind of raised an eyebrow a little at the whole "using your mind/imagination to get out of the ink realm" thing. It is not bad! And again, with what we saw in the book, this idea actually fits with what we had seen so far in the story. But I can't lie that when we got to this moment I was like "oh, this is something that happened, I guess", you know? But even so, I didn't dislike the idea.
(I once saw someone describe this part of the book as "they canonized no-clipping in Bendy" and you know what? I think that's funny. I think we need to start referring to this idea in the book as that instead of "using the imagination" /hj)
But even so, even with these small "nitpicks", I still had a lot of fun with this book. I really enjoyed reading it, and not only is it now one of my favorite Bendy books so far, I dare say it's one of my favorite things about the franchise in general. Like, if I had to make a top 3 of my favorite things from the Bendy series so far, I'd say it's this book and the first two mainline games. I guess this is to show how much I enjoyed the book!
And with that, my journey with the Bendy books ends. At least, with the books I managed to have access so far. I have no plans to pursue the updated version of the Employee Handbook so far, but from what I've heard and seen so far, I'm not missing anything too important. And the DCTL graphic novel….exists. It's definitely a graphic novel that exists. Dare I say that it is definitely one of the graphic novels of all time, alright. But what have I read so far? It was what I would say, a good journey. I've been interested in the Bendy books for a long time, and it's been a while since I read them, and I'm glad I did, despite recent events. Of course, they have their flaws and problems too, I have things about them that I myself identify as bumps in the road (and that applies to the novel trilogy too btw) But even with them in mind and acknowledging them, I still think that they are worth something. And I hope people still continue to recognize them and give them a chance. Even with its flaws, and with their whole canocity thing that happened a while ago, I still believe that people should check out the books eventually. Give it a chance, you know? If they did, and liked what they read, great! But if they don't like it, that's okay too! In the end, at least they, on both sides, gave it a chance. And that's what I at least want to see. I don't like the idea of discarding these things and pretending they don't exist just because the devs said they aren't canon to the games (because, in my view, just because the books aren't canon doesn't make them without value or that you can't have fun with them after all)
WOW, this is getting long, I think I got carried away. I think that's all I had to say. To conclude everything, here is my list of the Bendy books that I like the most and the ones I like least:
Fade To Black (I've already talked a lot about this book)
Dreams Come To Life (hand in hand with FTB being in first place. It has its flaws, some that may have already been mentioned before, but I still found myself liking it in the end. For a first novel, it worked out fine)
Crack-Up Comics (Really liked the comics. It's good to see more things related to the cartoon characters, and I like some of the characters introduced. Pretty fun stuff)
The Lost Ones (it's not a very "Bendy" focused book compared to the others, and I don't blame those who didn't like this one because of the lack of many Bendy elements, but I confess that I still liked it as much as the other 2, and I loved the protagonists of this one. Even so, of the trilogy, it is the weakest book)
The Illusion of Living (In itself, it's an interesting read. It's really cool to see more of Joey from a deeper angle, and see more of his past. But I confess that it's not my favorite read, and I still prefer the main novels. Not bad, tho)
JDS Employee Handbook (2019) (For the first Bendy book overall, it's not bad, and I like the lore tidbits it has. But compared to the rest, it's actually the weakest)
The TL;DR is: Fade To Black is fun and my favorite, I liked its story and characters. I liked the books. Check them out if you want. If you liked them, cool. If you didn't like them, that's cool too. Read in general.
And if you've read this far: Thank you! And at the same time, I'm sorry! Have a good day/afternoon/night everyone. Peace.
#bendy and the ink machine#batim#bendy and the dark revival#batdr#bendy: fade to black#bendy ftb#rose sorenson#evan ftb#archie carter#ollie sorenson#crookedsmileart#SORRY FOR 2/3 OF THE POST BEING LONG AS HECK#I got carried away a lot and there was no way back#I considered kind of deleting everything and rewriting it in a shorter way#but then I would erase a work that I could not erase#So there it is; my review (kind of) of Fade To Black#a book that changed my brain probably#and for now; my marathon of rereading the Bendy books is over#for now at least#I'm going to reread the trilogy again this year; I hope lol#Now I wait for a fourth novel#I really hope we get past 3 novels#I doubt we won't have a fourth book written by Kress#But still#I hope this really happens#I had a lot of fun with FTB; I don't want to stop here; you know#as a side note; I have no plans to read the books that will come out this year#not in the tradicional way at least;#i'll figure it out;just saying#blink;blink
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I wanna draw so bad but I'm trying to stay on top of my readings so I have like 3 chapters to read but it's so boring and I don't wanna read it </3 😔😔
#nicco blabs#i did this last year so it shouldnt be a surprise to me but omg im never gonna get used to it#just teach me the shit in class...#im paying to be taught not to teach myself with a goddamn book#anyways sorry for my rant#ALSO TEXTBOKKS ARE SO EXPENSIVE??#like ny child development textbook was 100 dollars??#i didnt buy it bc my friend found a pdf version thankfully#i was deadass gonna get a free trial for 12 days and copy and paste the whole book so i didnt have to pay for it...#that 100 dollars is going towards my groceries now <3#like thats gonna get me much tho...#fuck canada fr guys#everything far too expensive#anyways sorry for the rant in the tags...#thanks for reading it all if you got this far <33
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gonna start the secret history soon... will I get through it or DNF it for 2 years we will see
#my tolerance for books is 3-20 pages usually#library at mount char i dnfed at chapter 1#the first time i started vicious i dropped her page 10#gideon the ninth took me months to get to page 50#for vicious and gtn when i got past those points i finished the books in a day#library at mt char i just found the writing style ENRAGING#my point is i consider a book Good if i Get Through It
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seems like my heart does nothing but break lately
#oh my god dont read the tags. it breaks for everyone :( but on a more personal level#for my gf whos sinking deeper into something n i cant even help bc im a wreck myself but i am so so scared to lose her#still havent even been able to book a psych appointment n i rlly dont know where to go with all these ..em*tions#Guys i rlly dont understand one thing. how come one random freak whos in ur life at some point can derail a whole person like eons later#jeopardise their whole future just by crossing some lines for funz i really dont understand this#not fair not fair at all this is evil#and becasue u got unlucky someone wanted to be disgusting u have to carry the consequences#i rly still cant even say it i still cant even write it#i dont even know how . irl the only perosn i told in some capacity#is dealing with her own trauma and i hate that jsut being understanding is not enoughlike#Wow Lmao Its just Funny How it Shapes You. & U Can Never bury it forever becuz it will always catch up to you😂😂😂😂😂😂#AND THE PAST CAN NEVER BE ERASED 😃😃😁😁😂😂😂🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔪🔪#at least my gf has been taking steps to deal with it for.3 yrs and i just never even#LOL i feel like such a coward but the sh*me and the g**lt associated with the Thing..r so overwhelming i cant even admit it#what would i even do at the psych appointment like straight up what am i gonna say Lol#hai iam here to process something i dont actually remember probably becasue i was a child but imnot sure. n id rather#kms than tell u how i know 😂. So thats also why my heart breaks. for that little girl who was a ball of shame i guess and no matter#how much i cognitively.like rationally know its not my fault the ball of shame n guilt is still there#n it swallows me every time i vaguely start 2 think about acknowledging the Th*ng#or whatever. And thats just my end of the deal but my gf has it worse genuinely bc she remembers everything n still has to see the freak#n it went on for yrs n her family doesnt know n heres the worst thing hes a beloved family member a sweet boy with struggles of his own#well i hope he walks into traffic for doing what he did to her
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Do you know any good qsmp lore supercuts? I want to watch more qsmp content (since i've really only been following along with liveblogs; i only really watched wilbur's vods almost up to when the eggs were first supposed to disappear) but there's so much to watch and it doesn't all hold my attention.
https://youtube.com/@QSMPInfo?si=FUrtOTX89-XRWLvF
^^ this is the official qsmp lore recap channel!! honestly the best source I think you could get they condense so much of it so well. as for more recent stuff they haven't gotten to yet I'd recommend going on twitter (yeah i know I'm sorry 😔) and looking through your language of choices update accounts!! they're all run by official admins and have translated updates on every streamer per day. its a lot of lore but also liveblogging is how most people consume other lore, since there are people constantly streaming on the server. i look through the qsmp tag when i wake up in the morning and get home from school like a newspaper LMAO
typically I'd just suggest the twitter accounts, the recap channel, picking at least 2 or 3 different streamers to watch casually and looking through liveblogs. im a huge charlie guy obviously but I've literally never seen a cellbit stream before despite him being one of my favorite characters, I only know him through other streams and liveblogging. my spanish streamers don't stream on there anymore (cmon mariana and rubius D:) and so i mainly get Spanish updates from Spanish speakers on here!! point is you're doing great already LMAO just watch some of the recaps and look through the update accounts and you'll be fine.
(plus every stream they have to relay old information from one person to another so eventually you will get a lore info dump if you want to or not)
#i make yet anothet post just for me 👍#we have mail :]#AUGUAHJGFHH IM SORRY I DONT HAVE BETTER ANSWERS LMAO I WISH I DID!!#best recap of the story over the past couple of weeks that no channels have really covered:#the federation (big bad) kidnapped the eggs from the parents while everyone was asleep. this wasnt this first time theyve done this but!!#this time felt much different. like they were really gone for good.#forever was given brainwashing pills by cucurucho (federation worker/census bureau for the island)#and these pills fucked him up BAD. he keeps hearing a ticking clock sound and whenever it gets the loudest he snaps and takes more drugs#bbh has been grieving and every stream he loses a little more color. he lost all of his color and streamed his 'acceptance' stream#where he kidnapped the drugged members and put them in cages along with torturing fed members to get them to talk#phil finally logged back on and with tubbo and fit's (? I think) help they covered the main federation building in cobblestone and lava#essentially just griefed the server as a threat LMAO#phil wrote and delivered a note that essentially said 'give the eggs back by the end of the week. or else'#then we got cryptic messages that cellbit decoded#they said: 'the answer is not in the center'#that all leads to todays stream where charlie tubbo and roier went to the center of a maze they found through coords#(that fred not the feds gave to them in 3 seperate books)#and there was a wheel in the center surrounded by all of the eggs items. tubbo spun it and it landed on 5#then lava poured from the ceiling and mobs spawned kicking all three of them out#now this saturday (or tomorrow i think?) is a huge stream that was teased a couple says ago with the roman numerals 2#and the spinny wheel in the maze was written in roman numerals#so we think todays stream and all the lore is leading up to something with the eggs tomorrow/Saturday i forgor the date#and thats basically whats been happening this past few days!! theres a LOT more lore than normal dw we have just been experiencing.#The Horrors. this isnt normal LMAO#qsmp#<- forgot to tag this
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Hate to doom post, but I really don't think there's gonna be a 3rd season of Good Omens.
Not being renewed immediately is a very bad sign. Righteous Gemstones was renewed immediately; Succession was offered a 5th season, but Jesse Armstrong most likely declined considering he didn't want a 5th season.
From dumping off a whole season in one day, the writer's strike and (awful lol) studios prioritizing AI and reality shows, streaming generally dying, and the industry floundering, it's never good for very expensive shows that take a long time, e.g. fantasy, sci fi, etc. Even superhero shows are suffering and are going the way of westerns.
Basically I'm still dealing with trauma from Pushing Daisies being cancelled mid-season and I've been fighting those demons since I was 12. Disillusionment runs my life smdh
#and fucking dark crystal WAS RENEWED AND THEY BACKTRACKED#and studios are selfish with properties#in the past if you got cancelled you could try to go to a new studio#but now studios keep certain assets as part of IP#so they would have to make changes possibly like the set and music or even the actors#i'm super sad about it since while a book would be dank it just would noooooot be the same#idk it's depressing me more than the ending lol#being a fan of fantasy and sci fi is just hell man#good omens#good omens speculation#i am cry#good omens 2#good omens 3#good omens meta#aziraphale#crowley#michael sheen#david tennant#not tagging [redacted] author because he's on here and i'm not tryna make anyone sad i promise#pushing daisies#i didn't watch it regularly at the time and feel personally responsible for it dying smdh#dark crystal#i mean at least dark crystal had a NOT BUMMER REAL ENDING#my mom bemoans masters of sex being cancelled mid season but i didn't watch nor care about it so eh#succession#the righteous gemstones#and yes word choice of 'fighting my demons' was on purpose lmaoooo#reminder pushing daisies came out right before the writer's strike in 2007#which killed a lot of shows#especially high concept
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Okay, confession time... I've watched Red, White and Royal Blue three times already and I might have spent last Sunday frantically reading the book.
I'm so sorry to my mutuals for whatever is about to unfold...
#im so sorry#i watched because i saw a post in here saying it was available and i couldn't sleep on the 11th#and honestly i didn't like it that much cause im not like super into romcoms#buuuut i couldn't get it out of my brain#and then my friends came over on Saturday and i dont know why i proposed we watch it together#and it just hit so much harder watching it with other gay people#we were crying and screaming and laughing#it was an ✨ experience ✨ that showed me that it wasn't that i didn't like romcoms it was just that i couldn't relate but this was for me#for us#so we stayed up talking until like 3:30 am about like life and love and being queer#and as soon as i woke up on Sunday i downloaded the ebook and got my ass reading it like i was 13 again and hyperfocused on this shit#i finished it in less than 6 hours#and of course the book is so much better#but now with all my new canon knowledge i *had* to re watch the movie again#and im so sorry for the horrors this past week will bring to my mutuals dashes#rwrb#rwrb movie#red white and royal blue
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Ok, I'm apparently in such a state that Iroh's story from the Tales of Ba Sing Se episode. Made me cry.
Watched this episode who knows how many times. I know exactly what would happen. But it sure is the first time I've watched this episode since several major deaths in my life.
God. I'm not used to being this emotionally affected by things.
#speculation nation#a part of me feels like im watching this show anew#it's the first time im watching since i started doing some serious writing#so ive been seeing things through a storytelling lens i didnt have before#seeing things with a wisdom and understanding i didnt have before#and experiencing things with a depth of emotion that im not used to having.#i also nearly cried at the end of the desert episode. when aang was so angry and upset about appa that he went into the avatar state#and katara just stayed by him. reached up for him. looking So Tired...#used to calming him down from these states but hating that she is.#then both of them crying in each others' arms. it got to me man.#i wonder if ill be crying any other times from this watch. im clearly much more emotionally affected than i used to be.#man. man. this rewatch is changing smth in me i think.#reaching nearly 20 years into my own past with this. getting in touch with the person i used to be. and still kind of am#what a time! what a time.#this is episode 15 of season 2. ill probably be finishing season 2 today. and im excited to start season 3.#the book of fire is truly my favorite one of the show. so many good episodes in it. im excited.
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im so emotional rn :( hello!!! :(
#in a good way#i wish i could timetravel back to my younger self and tell them hey!!! youll be well enough mentally for a trip to jpn when ur 28#youll reach it <333333#like :( thats so cute. i want past-me to know we got so much better!!!!#we just booked our plane tickets<3#nohr.txt
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Tetsu's bday = my molecular bio + protein chemistry final :((
couldn't be anymore awesome -_-
sorry my lovers the kuroo bday fic will be up a little late, I have doomsday to pass :(
#not to mention these 2 are the most hardest courses I have taken this semester#Im like ripping my hair off#14 LECTURES?! AND EVERY LECTURE IS LIKE A GODDAMN UNIT OF A BOOK#who gives such shit-#every lecture takes atleast 3 hours to finish what a fucking drag man#and I keep forgetting the past lectures what the fuck man#and I gotta study after coming home too cause the very next day I got another final#wow#nice#must be nice having a life and write and breath normally#can't relate#sorry everyone Im just venting I really wanted to upload right on his day :(((#but issokay I'll read y'alls for the time being#:33
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