#i just don't think it's great for studies

[starssoblue]

"the reason adrien is just instantly good at everything he tries is because he is programmed to be that way as a senti" aside from the fact that i don't think that's how it works (and also while he was decent at everything he tried with marinette he wasn't instantly good at all of them, and what marinette actually said to him was that he could improve in anything with practice but it was a great first attempt) did we all collectively forget about how adrien actually canonically isn't the best singer?

[anonymusbosch]

on wanting to do a million things

prompted by @bloodshack 's

i wanna learn SQL but i wanna learn haskell but i wanna learn statistics but i wanna start a degree in macroeconomics also sociology also library science but i wanna learn norwegian but i wanna learn mandarin but i wanna paint but i wanna do pottery but i wanna get better at woodworking but i wanna get better at cooking but i wanna bake one of those cakes that's just 11 crepes stacked on top of each other but i wanna watch more movies but i wanna listen to more podcast episodes but i need to rest but i need to exercise but i wanna play with my dog but i wanna go shopping but i need to go grocery shopping but i need to do the dishes but i need to do laundry but i need to buy a new x y and z but i need to save money but i wanna give all my money away to people who need it more but i wanna pivot my career to book editing but to do that i have to read more and i wanna read more nonfiction but i wanna read more novels but i wanna get better at meditating but i wanna volunteer but i wanna plan a party but i wanna go to law school. but what im gonna do is watch a dumbass youtube video and go to bed

I think I've been doing slightly better this year about Actually Doing Things. not great! but I do a lot and I've been "prototyping" ways to get closer to doing as much as is possible. and if I actually talk about it it's a bunch of very obvious statements but I'll try to make them a little more concrete

rule number one: experiment on yourself

there's no one approach that's right for everyone and there's not even one approach for me that works at all times. try things out. see what works. pay attention to what doesn't. try something else.

rule number two: ask what's stopping you and then take it seriously

example: I often want to do Everything in the evening at like 2 PM, but then get home and am tempted sorely by the couch, and then get stuck inertia'd and not doing much but being tired and kind of bored. why?

if I don't have plans, it's easy to leave work later than planned and hard to make myself do something by a specific time

i'm generally tiredish after work. 4 out of 5 times, that'll go away if I actually start Doing Something, but 1 out of 5 it's real and I will go hardcore sleepmode at 8 PM and just be Done

i use up a ton of my program management/executive function/Deciding Things brain at work and usually find it noticeably harder to string together "want to do Thing > make list of Things > decide on a Thing > do Thing" after I'm home. Even if I have a list of Things to Do, how does one decide! how does one start! and god forbid there's a Necessary thing. then it's all downhill

therefore, mitigations: have concrete time-specific plans in advance.

if I have an art class at 6:00 PM I need to leave work by 5:15 and NO LATER and I can't get sucked into "oh 10 more minutes to finish this" *one hour later*

that also means I have to have a fridge or freezer dinner ready and can't spend 45 minutes cooking "fuck it, what the hell did I put in the fridge, why don't we have soy sauce" evil meal that is not good

plans with friends: dinner! art night! music night! repair-your-clothes night! seeing a show! occasionally, Accountability Time where a friend comes over for We Are Doing Tasks with tea and snacks etc.

for some reason I'm way better about Actually Doing Things when the plan exists already. magically I overcome couch inertia even though I am the same amount of tired! and while I never learn the ability to decouch without plans I at least learn to make them

still working on:

a "prototype" for maybe next month is a weeklyish Study Session for a thing I want to learn about. I want to somehow make it employer-proof (I am accountable to some entity to being at place X at time Y) and haven't figured out a good way. Maybe I can leverage that the local library is open til 8 on wednesdays and somehow make it a Thing? maybe I'll try it!

oh god oh fuck the thing about plans is that if you want to have them you need to make them. christ. a lot of the time I can cover this with some combo of weekend planning + recurring events (things like weekly friend dinner/weekly class) + having cool friends who reach out proactively but it still requires active planning and it can fall thru the cracks

rule three: cool friends

they can take you to things

they can remind you that you can do whatever the fuck you please

i have a friend who is somehow Always doing cool classes and learning shit. and this reminds me that I can ... do that. and sometimes I do

you can take them to things!!

rule four: try to kill the anon hate in your head

obv this depends on your circumstance but sometimes it's worth it to me to look at constraints that "feel real" and check whether they're an active choice I made thoughtfully or, like, the specters of people I don't know judging my choices

time and money are obvious ones. recently was gently nudged towards looking at whether i could give myself more time to Do Things by cooking less. imaginary specters of judgmental twitterites: "it's illegal to spend money. if you get takeout you're the first up against the wall when the revoution comes. make all your lunches and dinners and hoard the money for Later. for Something. how dare you get lunch at the store. you bourgeois hoe. taking charity donations from the mouths of the poor cause you don't have your life together enough to cook artisanal bespoke dinners every night. fuck you." and obviously eating takeout 24/7 is not the answer, but realizing I was not making an active choice helped me try making the active choice instead. "how much do I actually want to balance cost, time, tastiness, and wastefulness of my food, given my amount of free time and my salary and the tradeoff against doing something else? can I approach it differently to do more quick cheap food + some takeout?" -> current prototype: substitute in 1 takeout dinner or restaurant-with-friends a week, 1 frozen type dinner, and then batch cook or sandwiches lunches w/ "permission" to get fast lunch at the store. we'll see how it goes!

i am really really bad at this and find it helpful to talk to other people who can help point out when I'm being haunted by ghosts about it.

rule five: what would it take? what's the next step?

this one i give a lot of credit to @adiantum-sporophyte in particular for, especially for prompting me with questions when I muse about the million-ideal-lives on car rides. what would it look like to do xyz? what's something I could do right now to move in that direction? what's the obstacle? like, actually ask the question and think through it. with a person talking to you! damn! maybe the obstacle to x is that I don't know if I'll like it or if I just like the idea of it. and I don't want to commit to x without knowing. Okay, so maybe an approach would be to find someone who does x and talk to them about how their life is, or maybe it's "spend 15 minutes looking up intro-to-x near me", or "actively schedule 1 instance of x", or something like that. Or maybe it's that I don't know what it takes to do x. Okay, how about on Tues after dinner Adiantum fixes a sweater at my apartment while I spend 20 min looking at prereqs for x. like, it's so basic to say "to do a thing, you could try figuring out how to do it" but I think the important thing here is the feedback/prompting to even recognize "hey, step back, if you don't know the next step then figuring out the next step is the next step"

rule six: habits

prototyping: exercise

I do a lot better when I exercise in the mornings. I do a lot better when I do PT exercises regularly. For a while I was doing PT with friend in the morning every morning before work (accountability! a friendly face to make it more pleasant!) but that didn't really solve - it's not the kind of exercise that makes me feel awake/active, it's like dumb little foot botherings. but: having the habit of morning exercise made it easier to swap out 2 of the 5 days for more intense exercise, and then to swap those 2 for a different more intense exercise when I needed a break. it's easier to build a low-effort version of the habit and then work in the higher-effort one than to just Decide to be the kind of person who gets up at ass o clock to do cardio or whatever

rule seven: set up the structure of your life to make it easy

this is also a "duh" thing but like. on so many levels it comes down to structure your life to make the choice more doable. this can be something like "i structure my life to make vegetarian cooking baseline and vegan cooking the majority by stocking the pantry with staples and spices from cuisines that work well that way" or "i chose an apartment that lets me commute by bike" or "i have my camping gear put away in a fashion that makes it easier to gather frequently and lowers the barrier to trips" or "i keep physical books around to prompt myself to read xyz" to "i don't use instagram or twitter or snapchat or facebook" to . idk.

and in terms of charitable giving: similar deal. I have an explicit budget at the beginning of the year (~10% of my before-tax income), I know in advance what charities I give to, and I know what timing I will use (basically, alerts for donation matching around specific fundraising times). Anything outside the Plan comes from my discretionary budget/fun money. That makes it less of a mental load (the choice is already made; I don't grapple with every donation request or every bleeding-heart trap because I have a very solid anchor on "I give to xyz, the money's set aside") and it's armor against impulsive-but-not-useful scrupulosity. I structure the rest of my spending/life to prioritize a set amount and it makes it easier to follow through

rule eight: if you can do it at work a tiny bit that counts for real life

(infrequently used)

"hi mr. manager I think it would be great if I could use enough SQL to make basic queries in the database so we don't have to go through the software team for common/basic questions. I'd like to take 1 hr on Friday to go through some basic tutorials and then 1 hr with Pat on Monday so he can walk me through an intro for our specific use case. I estimate this will help save the team a couple hours a week of waiting for answers from the other team." and then you have enough of a handle with baby's first SQL that you can add little bits and bobs as you exercise it. this is responsible for a medium amount of my knowledge of python and all 3 brain cells worth of SQL.

rule nine: life is an optimization problem

not in, like, "you need to optimize your skincare and career and exercise and social life and have everything all at once" that's not what optimization means. optimization is like, maximize something with respect to a set of constraints. i explicitly Do Not do skincare beyond "wash face" and "sunscreen" bc I want to optimize my life for like looking at weird plants in the mountains. explicitly choosing to put time and money elsewhere! can't have it all all at once. so fuck them pores. who give a shit. yeah i ate a lot of protein shakes instead of home cooked breakfasts this week bc i was prioritizing morning exercise. im looking at this beautiful bug and it doesn't know what fashion is or what my resume looks like. im holding a lizard. im not spending time on picking cool clothes or whatever bc i spent that time looking up lizard hotspots on purpose.

that's really long and probably mostly, like, not surprising? but i keep benefiting from ppl being like "hey have you considered Obvious Thing" framed very gently

[mysteryshoptls]

SR Grim - Striped Ribbon Vignette

"The best time we can possibly have!"

[Ramshackle Dorm – Anniversary Party]

Grim: Wooooah. Ramshackle's all festive lookin' now! Take some pics with the ghost camera, [Yuu]!

Grim: When Ace and Deuce came over with the other first years this mornin', at first I was all, "What's goin' on!?"…

Grim: But looks like they were just puttin' up decorations for "Founding Day." What a bunch of kids, all super excited over somethin' like that.

You don't like Founding Day, Grim?

Grim: I-I didn't say that.

Grim: Night Raven College's a big-shot school that only lets chosen mages in. That means it's a huge deal to go to school here, right!?

Grim: There's no way any student here wouldn't be celebratin' Founding Day!

Well, so, it's great that they decorated everything so nicely for us, then.

Grim: …I guess.

Grim: But it was so crazy with how noisy everyone was. At least everything got done alright, thanks to my awesome leadership, though.

Grim: Didja see how Ace tried to skip doin' actual work, even though he's the one who came all on his own? He tried pullin' pranks on me again today, too!

What do you mean, "again"?

Grim: C'mon, you! Didn't you see him pickin' on me during flight class yesterday!?

Grim: When I was trying to fly on my broom, he tried to get in my way by using his wind magic to tickle me. He's so annoyin'!

Grim: He's obviously just jealous of my magical genius. I'm gonna show him who's the real boss one day!

Grim: Deuce was at least focusing on putting up the decorations, but he kept hanging the letters out of order… He's no better than Ace.

Grim: Oh yeah, that reminds me, the homework answer he gave me the other day was completely wrong and it got Crewel on our case, big time.

Grim: In the end, me 'n Deuce had to stay after for Crewel's special lessons. That guys should really do better on his studies.

I don't think you're one to talk.

Grim: Urgh… H-Hey, I've totally been taking my classes more seriously recently!

Grim: But in History of Magic, whenever Jack sits in front of me, I can't see the blackboard at all.

Grim: Plus, he's always sitting as straight up as he can despite him already being so huge, sayin' he needs to exercise his back muscles even in class.

Grim: If I say somethin' to him, he just says "Sit on [Yuu]'s shoulders" and doesn't budge one bit. He's such a muscle-brain.

Grim: Epel's gotta have the worst of it, seeing as he's in the same class as such a stubborn guy.

Grim: …Actually, Epel'd probably just snap back and pick a fight right away, huh.

Grim: He's a gutsy kid that hates to lose, after all.

Grim: We were sneakin' some food outta the cafeteria together the other day, too. We promised not to tell anyone, either… Boy, that sure was fun…

Grim: …Ah! Shoot, I just told you! That right now is a secret between us, okay!?

Grim: Speakin' of sneakin' food, Sebek's hard to deal with too! He's so stubborn, there's no use talkin' with him!

Grim: A little while ago, I tried just the tiiiiniest bit of some of his food, and he got super mad, yellin' and chasin' after me!

Grim: He just kept coming and he was shoutin' so loud my ears were starting to hurt real bad.

Grim: It was just one bite of his deluxe minced cutlet sandwich… Or was it five? Maybe ten bites?

I should probably apologize to him later…

[Ramshackle Dorm – Anniversary Party]

You look like you're really enjoying your time here at school, Grim.

Grim: Your little grin's creepin' me out, stop it. Well, what about you, then?

1. Every day is a blast, thanks to you.

Grim: Myahaha! Well, that goes without sayin'! Grim: And that's 'cause I'm here watchin' over and takin' care of you every day! Grim: …Good, good, you're enjoying yourself. Eheh.

2. I think I'm exhausted by all the trouble that happens every day…

Grim: My-Myaah!? Grim: What, does that mean you ain't havin' fun hangin' with me every day? I can't accept that! Grim: You'll see just how much I've been doin' for you! Just you wait!

Grim: …But hey, I guess I've gotten used to living in Ramshackle like this.

Grim: We're really doin' pretty good for ourselves in this run-down dorm.

Grim: That downpour the other day caused a huge mess the other day with all those leaks, though.

Grim: The bed and blankets were soakin' wet that I thought we'd have to sleep on the floor…

Grim: But luckily, one of the sofas made it through dry, so that was good. It was small and cramped, but way better than the floor.

Grim: We were able to patch things up with the help of the ghosts, but one day we definitely gotta get the school to cough up some dough to fix everything!

Definitely!

Grim: Yeah! We gotta make sure bein' here at this school's the best time we can possibly have!

[knock, knock]

Grim: Oh! Is that Ace 'n them?

Grim: We promised we'd all get together to celebrate Founding Day outside. I bet there's a feast planned, too!

Grim: Let's go, [Yuu]! Time for an outdoor party! Myaha!

Grim, let's keep at it together.

Grim: !

Grim: …Yeah! I'm definitely gonna keep lookin' after my little hench-human forever.

Grim: You just stick with me, [Yuu]!

Requested by @sweetdelightknight.

[changingplumbob]

Day Twenty - Chloe Group 2/2

Lara doesn't mind one way or the other that the date is in a small park in Tartosa, she's just thrilled to be on one!

Deanna: Hey you, I feel like we haven't had a proper chat in ages

Lara: I know! It can be hard with everyone, I don't want to push in

Deanna: *smiles* Well we can talk now. So tell me... did you enjoy school growing up?

Lara: Yes! What about you?

Deanna: I did! Although some days stuck in a hot classroom I just wanted to be outdoors

Deanna: When you were little did you have a dream job?

Lara: Yes! I wanted to be the greatest DJ of all time

Deanna: Well you're on the way there right

Lara: For sure! How about you? Did little Deanna dream of building robots

Deanna: *laughs* No my love of tinkering came later. I uh, wanted to be a pirate

Lara: Think of the epic parties we could throw on the open sea! Simply incredible

Lara: As a child, I used to organize dance competitions with my cousins and friends; the prize was the stuffed cookies my grandma made, even though, in the end, she gave them to everyone for their great effort hihi

Deanna: That's so cute! I often wished I had a nonna growing up

Lara: It was great, I'm sorry you missed out

Deanna: I guess I've been lucky in other ways though. No proper dance competitions with me and my siblings though, but a lot of make believe. I'm not a big dancer

Lara: Maybe that's just because you haven't been dancing with me yet *blows kiss*

After the date we head back to the villa where it is once again skill time! Will contestants focus on short term needs or play the long game with their study choices?

Improving personal relationships seems to be the flavour of the day. Apolline and Hana take time in front of the mirror to practice their charisma. Callie sticks to a joke book while Elise hones hercomedy skills online. Billie is feeling a little on the dark side after chatting to Artemisia and has decided to work on her mischief skill. Lara is hoping to plan ahead and reads some rock climbing tips.

While contestants are busy Deanna works on grilling a treat for dinner. Time to see how she felt the date went.

Devin: Chicken again?

Deanna: Grilled chicken and veges, not just chicken skewers this time'

Devin: So how was the date with Lara? Tell me!

Deanna: *smiling* It was so nice to spend time with her. She's so funny and cheerful. I'm definitely smitten with her after that

Devin (voiceover): How did you find it

Lara (voiceover): I think I got in my own head too much before, worrying about the others. When it was just me and Deanna I relaxed, I'm very smitten

Rather than heading to the dinning room for dinner contestants are asked to put on their active clothes and head out. They arrive at the local spa where they are greeted by Deanna and... someone else.

Deanna: Thanks for coming everyone. I know that this round must have been stressful. Meeting new people, competing, trying to decide if I'm worth staying for. That's why we're here with my best friend Reece, this guy. He is an outdoors loving genius with a desire to spread zen so he's going to lead us through a guided meditation

Reece: Hello. I look forward to meeting you all properly later. For now follow me to the meditation garden. It's outside but in the shade so we won't need to worry about sunburn

Reece led the group through a meditation, successfully lowering heart rates and ensuring everyone was in a good mood for the rest of the evening. Before going in the spa however, one more surprise. Deanna had grilled up a picnic for everyone!

Again Deanna may have started out at the picnic table but didn't stay there. While she enjoyed talking with Lara, Apolline and Elise she really wanted to go to the pillow area. There she had a good chat with Billie and Reece about the benefits of the outdoors. It was surprising to hear Billie talk of fishing but I suppose a painter would know where to find goldfish. Hana saved that nugget of wisdom for later.

Heading in to the spa everyone got a face mask! They were assigned to either relax in the sauna, relax in a massage chair or get a proper massage as their first activity. Autonomy was toggled on full from the moment the meditation ended so contestants had some time to chat or further pamper themselves. Remember, if they do not win a date from the upcoming cast challenge then this will be their last opportunity to talk to Deanna before the commencement ceremony. Reece is also around but friendship gained with him will not be judged.

Taking a break from the massage chairs Deanna chose to head to the sauna with Lara and Callie. while they were steaming the rest of the contestants relaxed and enjoyed a nice foot soak. While Hana and Billie celebrated their creative sides with animal masks our resident rich girl relaxed in a golden face mask. Apolline tried to order a drink but yet again the bartender left, it must be something about the time? No matter, a spa assistant poured a tray of drinks for the ladies.

Some friendships cemented themselves over the fizzy water. Hana finally accepted that Apolline did know a thing or two about art and happily chatted to her. Outside the sauna Elise and Billie struck up more conversations about gorgeous landscapes, each enjoying the others descriptions. Downstairs Lara and Callie chatted to Deanna and Reece. Lara and Reece got quite a friendship going.

Cut to cr-

Aww, nevermind. We have to witness what Lara did autonomously. It's not the lips but it's the first almost kiss of the season. And kissing a face mask, commitment to the cause. Deanna is delighted by the display of affection.

Cut to cred-

Uh oh! Callie saw that and she is NOT delighted. After seething and shedding a tear she pulls Deanna aside to give her a piece of her mind… and several face slaps. She storms off and something tells me this action will have consequences…

Both her friendship and romance bars automatically dropped by 9 despite her settings being that physical romance will not trigger jealousy. She doesn't have the jealous trait but she has developed the fear of being cheated on… How's Lara taking this? Oh she's chilling and chatting with Reece looking proud of herself and absolutely undeterred. Maybe it's best that this is the last day for the Chloe group.

@belsasim, @igglemouse, @invisiblequeen, @paracosmic-sims, @perolesims, @simscici

[mtcloudsworld]

Can I please request a fic for Jason maybe how he would react to meeting a reader (black fem reader) who’s super confident so open about her attraction to him just out right saying he’s sexy/fine to their mutual friends idk I just need some Jason feeling wanted and knowing his feelings are reciprocated ❤���❤️❤️

𝐉𝐀𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝐍𝐄𝐄𝐃𝐒 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐓𝐎𝐎 | j.todd x black fem reader

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 | I didn't give much description on the reader but it is black fem reader intended. I just got lost in the sauce is all lol. No warnings except that it's just fluff with some errors here and there probably. Just ignore them if you can.

⠈⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠈⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁

Let's put a little spin on the block shall we?

I think in this case, Jason knows a little bit of you right? He knows just a portion of you because Roy talks about you like your next big thing. He finally gets to meet you at your best friend's birthday party. At first he was kinda on the outskirts like he usually is but when you come around, he'll admit, he sees what all the hype's about. Y'all hung out a few times after that. There have been some great conversations and what not, went as far as exchanging numbers and as of recently they've been noticing the shared glances, the smiles, jokes and what not.

And you're friends? Well... they're betting their money and a life time supply of ass kissing that something beautiful just might happen between you two.

Now Jason hasn't really put himself into the dating scene yet, now of course he's had a few crushes along the way but nothing too serious.

And as you sit back in the perimeter of his space, in this friendly medium size cafe, smelling the fresh scent of coffee beans and cologne, in the proximity of his warmth, with the sun beaming past his face, you gazed over that jaw dropping, god like face and into those baby blue eyes-- you can't help but to think: How could anyone NOT like him? How could he NOT have a girlfriend already?

The man is built-- massive, muscles and all. 6 ft something, prince charming material, top tier sense of humor, tempting, a whole ass meal, sensible, a gentleman, girl dinner, a lover, a protector, a man you'd let bend you over on the kitchen counter and fuck the living shit out of you--

I mean, the list could really go on and on and on and on honey

His behavior, personality and quirks were all so cute and attractive, and of course you haven't seen the night terrors or any scars he has to deal with, but trust and believe that's manageable. it's just enough to want you to get to know him on a deeper level.

⏜︵♡︵⏜︵୨୧︵⏜︵♡︵⏜⏜︵♡︵⏜︵

As you watched him walk to retrieve yet another book, you couldn't help but release a soft sigh in bliss. "God he is so fine." Roy and your best friend roll their eyes, smiling from ear to ear as they give shared glances. They knew your interest was peeked, they also knew you've been wanting to shoot your shot for sometime now, but strangely, you haven't had the courage to do so. "Girl just go over there and talk to the man."

You give them a shy smile and shrug, "I don't want to seem weird though."

Your best friend chuckles, head shaking as she nudges her shoulder into yours, "I promise you won't. Trust me, go talk to him."

You sigh in defeat, giving a curt nod before standing to your feet and walking over to him. You weren't close by for him to sense your presence yet. However he caught a whiff of your scent lingering nearby, he has recognized it, studied it and memorized it all once before and you were the only person who wore this distinct fragrance. So, naturally, when you came closer, his attention turns to you. The sight of his eyes glowing in happiness and the smirk that rises to his lips makes your insides twist in relish. Feeling your cheeks burn and lips curl into a smile as you stand close by "So, whose your next victim?" You'd ask playfully looking down at the book in his hand with cluelessness and innocence pooling in your eyes.

⏜︵♡︵⏜︵୨୧︵⏜︵♡︵⏜⏜︵♡︵⏜︵

And you? You're so beautiful. So, so beautiful. He could look at you for hours upon hours upon hours and could never get enough of you. The way your skin glowed in the sunlight was exquisite. The rich tone of your voice sent a sweet ring to his ears as he listened to you talk. Charming in every sense-- your charisma sent him blushing, every flirtatious comment and glare you sent his way made butterflies swarm in his stomach.

Your confidence was blunt. Bold in every way, inspiring and admirable. He found the things and the people you loved were drawn from deep passion. You were undeniably sweet, so sweet that it felt so unfamiliar to him. Your touch, gentle and warm, made a part of his shoulder or arm tingle with want and need.

He may look cool calm and collected on the outside but inside?

Baby that man's heart is punching against his ribcage 😭 his skin is hot and he's trying his damn hardest not to make a fool of himself.

And the way you say his name?!?! Uggggh, his heart, his poor little heart!

Effortlessly you've got this man wrapped around your tiny little finger. Your independence was attractive, the way you care for others wa tender and lovely. He liked how you thought about him constantly, your genuine care for him was sudden but expected, you never shy away from inviting him places, buying his favorite snacks and what not. Just, sigh, everything about you made him feel uplifted and seen.

But even when he's feeling all these emotions, and these little things are happening to spike his blood pressure, somewhere in the deepest part of his brain where insecurity dwells, he believes you're way out of his league.

⏜︵♡︵⏜︵୨୧︵⏜︵♡︵⏜⏜︵♡︵⏜︵

Where Jason resides, he stood and observed from a distance you and your best friend chatting it up with a mutual coworker you hadn't seen in a minute. Undoubtedly it was a guy and Jason couldnt help but feel a little jealous??? couldn't help but feel like yeah, you're beautiful and single and have every right to talk and cheese all in another guy's face.

Yet, he couldn't shake this mixture of feelings that although he wants you all to himself, he feels he's not worthy enough to be something more for you. He doesn't feel worthy enough to have you when he does all these bad things-- living a double life.

He's basically stuck between a rock and hard place, and Roy can see it. His brows knitted in dissatisfaction, pondering his choices as he burned holes into the guy's head, but still, he glanced at you with tenderness.

"I don't think I'm good enough Roy, not even the slightest." He murmured, seated at the table across from his friend, playing with the red solo cup between his fingers. "If I told her what I was all about, I bet you she'll walk away-- I know she would."

"But you don't know that," Roy argued, gently. "You can't just assume the worst if nothing has happened yet."

"You say you're not good enough and that she may not like you, but you don't realize the most energy she gives you than any other person out there. She's drawn to you, Jason, more than you think. You're worthy of having a relationship, of being happy, of being loved... you're worthy of all of that. Stop saying you aren't because you are."

And fortunately, Roy was right. He was always right.

Because as Jason was left to his thoughts (Still hesitating and having a hard time believing it all). There was a moment when you noticed him all alone, pouting a little. Ditching the duo to approach him instead made his heart clench. You were all smiles, reaching for his hand and suggesting for them to take a walk.

He could never resist you, even if he tried.

⏜︵♡︵⏜︵୨୧︵⏜︵♡︵⏜⏜︵♡︵⏜︵

He felt you could do so much better than him.

But you didn't want better, did you?

You didn't want anybody else.

You didn't have your eye on anybody else because you were too busy gawking at the physique and personality of a god who could have you folding in 2.5 seconds. You were starstruck, in awe and it was kinda hard to believe that Jason was oblivious to it all when you are so open and blunt about it.

Soooooo, what can you do? Hm?

What can you do to make this man understand that you are into him?

⏜︵♡︵⏜︵୨୧︵⏜︵♡︵⏜⏜︵♡︵⏜︵

"Looks like you've got something on your mind."

You blink.

Your head turns to him, humming in response once you come back to your senses. In the middle of the dance floor, all alone now, held by the waist as you swayed slowly underneath the starry night sky, dim lighting from the hanging lights along the tent. You give him a close-lip smile in reassurance and shrug, adjusting your arms around his shoulders a little.

"I hope you're not bored of me."

"Pfft, bored?" You snicker amusingly. "you're anything but boring, Todd."

"You're never this quiet though."

He notices your mood switches, "...I know." You've grown quiet, hesitant as you avoid eye contact now.

Jason frowns. Eyes trained on, his hands squeeze at your hips for a second, grasping your attention again. His thumbs begin to caress at your sides soothing the nerves bubbling from within, admiring the giant before you.

"What's on your mind?" His voice grew curious. Yet you couldn't shake off the caring tone in his voice. Blue eyes swirl with need and want. He spoke with deep vibrato, placing you in a trance of encouragement for you to speak.

You hum, gaze diverted elsewhere as you ponder in thought. Your cheeks start to burn, then a chuckle and next a groan. A sudden burst of bashfulness on your face grows as you lean into his chest, attempting to cover the embarrassment all over your face.

A helpless groan is heard, "I don't wanna say..."

Jason gulps, clearing his throat at the action. Trying his hardest to not freak out as your face practically nestles into him. "No, c'mon what is it? Clearly it's bothering you if you're thinking so deeply about it." He says causally.

There was a silence, one that was filled with anticipation. And then there was a sigh, one of defeat and submission as you start to speak again. "Have you ever... liked someone so much you wish you could tell them without dying inside?"

"A little dramatic if I'm being honest but yeah... I've had my fair share of crushes in the past." He humors, gazing over you. "Why you ask?"

"I may...or may not have a crush on somebody." You say, hesitantly

"Hm. Whose the lucky bastard?"

Your gazes locked, and for a split second you thought he was joking. You thought that maybe he'd give you a playful smirk and say, "what? you didn't think I know?" But he doesn't do any of that. He's seriously asking who this crush of yours was.

So you toy with him murmuring, "I doubt you'd know anything about him."

"Hm," he shrugs, clueless. "A little background check wouldn't hurt none." He couldn't possibly be this oblivious but he was. It made you smile, endearingly. It honestly made you want to laugh because this was just sickly cute and silly of him to think it was anybody but him.

"it's you.. Jason."

The smile on his face slowly fades away, realization hitting him like a ton of bricks when h recollects your words.

"...what?"

"It's you. I have a crush on you Jason." You admit confidently this time. You slowly feel yourselves pull away, watching as his eyes grow slightly wide in shock, brows knitted in confusion. "I've liked you for a while now. Ever since we met I've always thought you were the most sexiest man I've ever laid eyes on." Your bluntness makes him blush along the tips of his ears to his cheeks. "You're a sweet man, Jay. I find it hard not to think about you daily. You make me feel happy, you make me feel acknowledged when you consider me." You sigh, "I just don't understand how a man like yourself don't have a girlfriend already. You're not ugly, you're far from that. You're a confident charmer, flirtatious even. Even when you say you don't mean to do so intentionally, it just comes out of you naturally. I love how sensible and caring, you are. I know that vulnerability can be hard for you because of your past but I can tell, you wanted to be needed at the end. I wanted more. Even the way you look at me its.ljke you're begging for me to stay a little longer, begging for me to be yours only, begging for a chance." His eyes flickered shut to the feeling of your hand cupping at his cheek, nestled in the palm of your hand as if he was a cat begging to be scratched. "I like every aspect of you, Jay," you say sweetly, your bodies drawing closer till there was no space between you two to fill. "I don't want to lose this feeling, this connection we have? I don't want it to go away." You whisper cupping his face now, you're foreheads meeting and hooded gazes locked now.

He doesn't say anything, and you frown.

"Jason? Please say something. Anything? I promise you I won't get upset if you don't feel the same. I know it's a little sudden, I get it, but I didn't know how else to tell--"

⏜︵♡︵⏜︵୨୧︵⏜︵♡︵⏜⏜︵♡︵⏜︵

His lips smashed against yours that night, shutting up any doubts or hesitation you both might've had at that moment. While you were quick to submission and he was quick to need, your lips moved slowly yet eagerly, in tune with yours. His hands weren't hesitant to hold you close, wasn't hesitant to groan in the kiss as your finger tugged at his hair. Growing an obsession at the taste of each other, your both breathless, small moans are heard and internally his heart was fluttering to you clinging to him. You both didn't want to break the kiss. But you had to. You had to, unreluctantly catch your breath. Just in time to see heart eyes glare into yours, to see that smirk dance along his lips. You giggle, turning head to the side as you feel your cheeks burning again. His nose bumps into your cheek, strong arms deciding to wrap around you possessively as he kisses between your jaw and neck.

⏜︵♡︵⏜︵୨୧︵⏜︵♡︵⏜⏜︵♡︵⏜︵

Later that night, you had called him to let him know you made it home safely. The call was supposed to be short and sweet but...

"I'm sorry that it took me so long to realize..."

You smiled as you placed the phone beside you, laying on your side as you close your eyes for a moment. You hum, "I think you were just hesitant, had a a difficult time believing it. You chose to ignore the signs because you felt you weren't good enough, which is not true."

"...Maybe." silence. "It's just strange to me, unfamiliar to hear someone say they want me."

"Well...I want you Jason, I really do." He could hear the smile on your voice as you spoke with such sweet softness. Admittedly he felt he could die in that moment, as he smirked down at the phone in his hand.

"Then...you can have me, all of me."

⏜︵♡︵⏜︵୨୧︵⏜︵♡︵⏜⏜︵♡︵⏜︵

Let's just say in the end there was no keeping this boy away from you, he was head over heels for you. You gave him security, you gave him communication, the space to be vulnerable when he least expected it. He felt more spoiled than you did in the relationship and that was okay. He deserved every bit of it just as much as you did. It took some time to admit who he truly was, to understand why he worked so late and came to you with all kinds of wound and bruises. His past and trauma made sense. But it didn't make you view him any less of a boyfriend. Actually, it turned you on even more. It was more sexy to know you were dating a badass vigilante who gave two fucks about his reputation, but was willing to protect you at every cost.

𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐑 | sorry this took me a minute. I had soooo many ideas for this one and just couldn't choose what route to go on. Sorry if it's not what you wanted I completely understand.

Like, comment, reblog. Requests are open so if you have an idea you'd like me to write out, I'm all ears 😁

𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐒 𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐄𝐃

𝐃𝐎 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐋 ©𝐦𝐭𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐝𝐬 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟓

[silverofthunder]

☆ favor ☆

Copia & Papa V Perpetua

summary: the first meeting between Copia & Perpetua

content: 1k words, brotherly stuff, a lot of emotions i think?

i don't even know what this is. wanted to write something because i haven't written anything for a while. also i've been having a lot of Copia & Perpetua feelings so... yeah. enjoy! ♡

Copia barely registered the knock on the door but then the door was opened and he tore his gaze away from the computer screen.

It was him.

Papa V Perpetua.

Copia let out a sigh, a string of curses going through his mind as he stood up.

"Sorry, I thought..." Perpetua started, vaguely motioning to the door, a look of hesitance on his half-masked face.

"Just come in." The words came out a bit sharper than necessary but it didn't seem to bother Perpetua as he stepped inside and closed the door. He walked slowly closer to Copia's desk and Copia wasn't sure what else to do than stand behind it awkwardly.

This meeting was supposed to happen at some point but it still felt too soon. He wasn't ready.

Perpetua's gaze studied him, curious, and Copia shifted, squeezing the hem of his suit jacket between his fists, the leather of his gloves creaking.

"Nice to finally meet you."

Copia blinked, his mouth twitching. He didn’t know what to say so he just nodded instead and Perpertua seemed to be okay with that. He must have realized that Copia really wasn't prepared for the situation.

Copia watched as he moved, slowly, turning his gaze to take in the office. The bright light made Perpetua's mask glow and Copia was secretly glad he wasn't wearing the rhinestone one - that shit would have blinded him on the spot.

Perpetua stepped over the boxes but one somehow caught him and he tripped and before Copia knew, he was grabbing a hold of him to keep him from falling.

Perpetua let out a little laugh as he staightened himself up, and Copia flashed him a smile, though he wasn't sure if it came out more of a grimace.

"I've been meaning to move those but..." Copia sighed and Perpetua just brushed it off with a wave of a hand. He looked a bit embarrassed, though, lowering his gaze as he was standing securely again.

"So..." Copia said, wanting to start the conversation finally. "Tour is starting soon. How are you... feeling about it?"

Perpetua's eyes found him again, wide with surprise.

"A little nervous, I suppose," he answered. "Excited but also, uhm... like I shouldn't be doing it."

Oh.

Oh.

Copia couldn't deny that he was feeling the same but obviously he wasn't going to say it to Perpetua. He was still mourning the loss of the performing part, to be able to be on stage and give everything he had to the audience. It hurt to not be able to do it again. It hurt to be replaced by someone else, by his own twin, nonetheless.

"Ah, don't worry about it. You'll grow into the role eventually."

It might have been a weak attempt at encouragement but the way Perpetua's eyes lit up told Copia his words weren't a complete miss.

"Perhaps. I know I can never be like you, as great as you, but I'll do my best," Perpetua admitted and Copia felt a sting in his chest.

Damn.

Copia shifted, reaching out his hand and placing it on Perpetua's arm, giving it a slight squeeze. Perpetua's mouth opened and he looked like there was so much he wanted to say but not one word came out. Copia offered him a small smile.

"You don't have to be like me. People already love you from what I've read."

The look in Perpetua's eyes turned softer, almost shiny and a tiny bit in Copia's chest melted.

"Yet some still would rather have you on stage."

"You'll win them over, I'm sure of it," Copia said, not really knowing where all these words were coming from now.

"I don't know..." Perpetua said, his shoulders slugging, the self doubt seeming to get the better of him. Copia sighed, long and deep, knowing the feeling all too well.

He gave Perpetua's arm another squeeze, searching for the right words. Despite his mixed feelings about the man in front of him, he couldn't just ignore the request that lied behind the words.

"Eh, do you maybe need some guidance?"

Perpetua nodded slowly.

"If that's not too much to ask."

It wasn't, really. If Copia thought about it, helping Perpetua would at least give him a fraction of his old life back. Maybe not directly but to some extend anyway.

"Whatever you need," Copia said and the smile he got from Perpetua made his chest sting even more but also a slight ball of warmth blossomed there and it was something he couldn't just brush under the carpet.

"Thank you, brother," Perpetua said, putting more emphasis to the last word and Copia let out a slight, embarrassing noise.

"You know...?"

"Yes, I knew it before I came here."

"Oh..." was all Copia got out and earned a little laugh from Perpetua.

"All my life I've felt like something has been missing and now I know what it was. Who it was."

The words seemed to punch all the air out of Copia's lungs, all the emotions surging to the surface. A part of him wanted to punch a wall while another wanted to just wrap his arms around Perpetua. He did neither, instead standing frozen in place and staring at his brother, eyes burning from unshed tears.

Perpetua looked so genuine, almost child-like, with his soft smile and big, bright eyes, and if that hadn't melted Copia's heart, nothing probably would have. He used all his willpower not to hug Perpetua, patting then his arm before pulling away and turning to face his computer.

"Well, I guess we can continue later," he said, pointing at the screen. "I've got some work to do."

In truth he didn't have that much work, he just needed a moment to himself.

"Oh, of course," Perpetua said, making his way past the boxes on the floor, this time not tripping on any of them. He stopped by the door, hand on the handle.

"I'm looking forward your advice," he added and Copia just nodded, waving his hand. Then Perpetua opened the door and exited the office. As soon as the door closed, Copia sat on the couch and buried his face in his hands with a loud sigh.

The tears ran free soon after.

[thali-lemmonpie]

My Star Trek OCs and their parents

names and info under the cut:

Mom: T'Vran (58), she's an exo-agronomist.

1) T'Lyra's Family

Dad: Arev (57), he's an exo-anthropologist and ambassador assistant.

They meet at a young age in a federation colony (that has a majority of humans) while they were working in their areas. They went straight to the point and once they realized they both were compatible and soon they bonded.

Life in the colony was lonely, and they were thinking to go back to Vulcan until they were invited to a Punk Community that received them with their arms open and without hesitation. Soon they started participating until they blended well within the community.

A couple of years later T'Lyra was born in that ambient, she has a couple of siblings. They all practice the Surak teachings to a T.

T'Lyra will debate everything, she has a future in security that's for sure.

2) Shryr's Family (I'm so sorry for the long names I found it funny)

Dad 1: Nicolas Aníbal Riquelme Aravena (55), Physician

Dad 2: Yeison Antonio del Carmen Diaz Rojas (56), Engineer

They meet at a Deep Space base while studying, they bonded over being born in the same country (Chile) and soon enough they were inseparable. They went to work at the antártica and meet Shryr bio-parents and became great friends. Unfortunately, Shryr parents died in an accident and left their 3 year old toddler in their care.

Has been fun, they like to change locations (always where is cold, they do like snow not only because of their son). They don't work for the starfleet but they accept to relocate where they're nedded.

Shryr likes the life he has with his dads, he wants to pursuit exo-biology in starfleet.

3) Shanak's Family

Dad: Lorian (94), accountant

Mom: Mivi (64), IT

Both of them meet at a starbase were they work for the same office (yep, they have a 9 to 5). Lorian was a widower with a son in the way of Kolinahr while Mivi was divorced with a teenager son.

They spent a year knowing each other before courting and a year later they bonded and got married. They had Shanak 2 years later at the same starbase.

They spent holidays in their homeworlds, Shanak had some trouble with her emotions so her older Vulcan brother (who was a Kolinahr master at that point) taught her rigorous meditations skills that has helped her. Her orion brother would like her to be freer but he loves her anyway.

Her mom was a little bit delulu thinking she was going to have the same problem Amanda Grayson had when she was pregnant with her until his husband reminded her that they were just a couple of employees in a random company in a random department, neither were the ambassador for an entire planet, that made her chuckle.

Shanak is divided between science and engineering, but will pursuit both just for fun.

They all went to Starfleet in the 2370s and became great friends ❤ T'Vran and Mivi became besties once they meet (also because their daughters started dating)

[dufferpuffer]

Can you talk a little about Remus’ intelligence? Recently I’ve felt it’s been severely downplayed in fandom as a response to fanon depicting Sirius as “the dumb one” and Remus as “the smart one” in a wolfstar context. While obviously Sirius is extremely intelligent that doesn’t mean Remus has to be dumb in contrast? I also think they just have different types of intelligence, and I strongly believe that basing their intellect off of their achievements in school is limiting (also people don’t take into account that Remus was sick every month for at least 3 days, even if he was matched perfectly in intelligence with Sirius he’d still be doing worse in school). What’s your take on this my balanced remus lover friend?

I don't think Remus is a 'genius', like James and Sirius might be. But he's a bloody capable wizard - hard-earned, not talent.

The one flashback we get of him as a kid, we see him focusing hard on his OWL's, despite an upcoming Full Moon. He has his own methods for revision - when he asks Sirius if he would help him study, Sirius can't fathom why he should bother. Sirius doesn't need to revise or study - but Remus is good at it.

You're damn right that doesn't mean he is stupid compared to Sirius. There's nothing stupid about forming methods to help himself learn. Sirius and James are natural talents - Remus is a nerd.

By adulthood his work ethic has paid off: He has effortless confidence in his charms and conjuring - doing most of it without incantation. He's kind of a badass: He conjured fire and a non-corporeal Patronus without incantation - while exhausted and in the presence of a dementor. He could duel Lucius Malfoy, battled death eaters in the astronomy tower, dueled while flying and supporting an injured man on his broom - and disarmed multiple people in a row with enough accuracy to catch their wands. (tbf they were children)

Remus is a natural at teaching. First day on the job: he handles a room full of kids like he's been at it for years, even those with difficulties who need extra care and encouragement. He is patient with Harry learning to cast a Patronus, explaining things clearly to him - changing his explanation as Harry's needs change. This shows a deep understanding of both the material he is teaching... and what it is like to learn. Knowing how to struggle, how to adapt, how to learn, the validity of different perspectives - that's good wisdom.

His greatest strength is his Social Intelligence. Witty, astute, cunning, sly, persuasive… Sirius isn't socially inept but he is so honest and blunt he can come across as kicking the door down - rather than Remus' picking the lock and making it seem like a natural innocent behaviour. Does that make sense...? It was the entirety of his role in PoA: A murderer on the loose after Harry's blood - and yet through all the mysterious absences, sketchy evasiveness, superficial closeness with Harry, slightly slap-dash teaching methods and blatant distrust from Snape (who had been proven trustworthy - Harry just thought he was an arse)… Remus Lupin manages to charm his students, getting to know them without any of them knowing anything about him. He has Harry hanging off his every word, despite obvious apprehension to engage with him about his parents or needs. He effortlessly keeps Harry's trust even when he blatantly, skillfully lies in-front of him - and TO him! For his own gain!!! The scene of the Marauders Map is a brazen display of how quickly he can manipulate his way out of a complex situation. Even when he is with a murderer and they all know he will turn into a werewolf soon - he commands emotional focus. Ron is injured, a Murderer is present, they are supposed to be investigating a rat with haste... yet most of the time they are discussing HIM and why HE is 'not so scary, please don't hate me' in a long-winded fashion.

Only Snape seems immune. So he bullies him to shut him up. Without SEEMING like a bully. The kids think he is great, the way he can control the uncontrollable - Snape and Peeves.

Remus slips in and everyone is so taken with him they never notice the lock being picked. Their perception of him is on a tight leash. A magician’s sleight of hand and a silver tongue. Lockheart WISHES he could do this.

Remus is practical and practiced. He has the grit of someone who has fought for his life with both his wand and his tongue. He has lived a life of misdirection, gaslighting and manipulation - always subtle, always present. He reads others better than himself and moves through society with quiet ease, slipping in unnoticed and slipping out just as easily. No wonder he works as a spy.

He’s a top-class wizard - held back only by circumstance. Balancing his core needs, his interests and his health with no support network and poverty…? yeesh. In another life he may have been able to focus his efforts on a passion, rather than on topics that aid his survival in a harsh world.

As he is, though: he’s a formidable duelist and skilled charmer (magically and socially) - a survivalist, both in the wild and within society. An outcast who never seems like one. A wolf in sheep's clothing.

That's my take, as 'balanced remus lover friend' :^) Thanks - I needed to sit down and yap about Remus for a bit, had a shitty month

[wonderingwhereileftreality]

part 2 of Gnome Scientist AU, because I had more thoughts

So most people seem to think that Stanley would still pretend to be Ford in-person, and that is definitely on-brand, but please consider:

Stan chokes the first time someone thinks he's Ford and accidentally denies it instead of going along.

He can't exactly live as Stanley though (because Stanley's a wanted criminal in most of the country...also he's dead, Stanley has held the fake funeral at this point, he can't go back), thus forcing him to create a "long lost cousin" that happened to be interested in the sciences and ended up as Ford's research assistant despite not having any proper credentials (nepotism, am i right?)

Here's how it plays out in my head:

???: so, you're the great Stanford Pines?

Stanley: no no, I'm Stan-*realizing he's just fucked up*...iel. Staniel Pines, his...cousin...

Stanley, internally: oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck that's the worst fake name I've come up with so far.

???, oblivious: Wow, the Pines family must really like the name "Stan"

So Stanley Staniel explains that he writes the papers for Ford so that the workaholic scientist can spend more time in the field, thus why no one ever seems to catch him at the shack.

So, not only is Ford going to be known in the scientific community as "the guy who discovered gnomes", he's also basically become a local cryptid, with people gossiping about what he might be studying and claiming to have seen him in different parts of town (really it was just Stan doing some light field research to flesh out some parts of Ford's report).

That being said, there are definitely people that know he's not Ford or "Staniel"

Obviously Shermie and Caryn would recognize Stanley, but they don't know about the portal so they probably just don't bring it up because they think Stan will make himself disappear on purpose if he gets caught. (this is also technically my theory on why they would think he's Ford in canon; like they know its him, he's missing 2 middle fingers, but nobody's willing to risk calling him out on it)

I can also imagine Fiddleford eventually reading one of the papers Stanley got published and try to confront Stan about them...either because

He's angry at Ford for publishing evidence of the supernatural (since at this point he's formed the Society of the Blind Eye and letting everyone know that Gnomes are real is kinda the exact opposite of what his cult's about)

Stanley didn't know who Fiddleford was and wouldn't have been able to properly credit him on any of the published findings. (Don't get me wrong, Fiddleford isn't exactly a gloryhog, but he's definitely dragged Ford out of enough deadly situations that he should at least get some kind of recognition.)

He's a little miffed at how quickly Ford replaced him with a new assistant and just wants to give him a piece of his mind.

Also them meeting would allow Stan to explain the portal incident with someone that could (with a bit of convincing) reasonably help him in speeding up the repair process, so that maybe Ford doesn't have to wait 3 decades to get home.

[tobiasdrake]

Digimon Adventure 02x22 - The Brave Evolution! XV-mon / Davis Cries Wolfman

Previously on Digimon Adventure: Chimeramon came back for another go but Wormmon killed them with kindness. Unfortunately, in the process, Chimeramon also killed Wormmon with excessive violence. Nonetheless, the Chosen Children completed their mission and the Ken was given a new mission of his own: Go touch grass.

Apparently this is NOT the episode that goes into Ken's past. That will be next episode. So the Dub Narrator was wrong when he said we'd find out today what Ken will do with the Crest of Kindness, and I was a fool to trust him.

Uh, content warning for extensive involvement of urination. If you're squeamish about that, this one's gonna be gross.

With the Digimon Kaiser at last overthrown, we open on another normal day at Odaiba Elementary. Iori's in class reading a thematically relevant passage from a textbook.

Iori: Thus, the country was saved. The king was overthrown and the country was saved. The king was overthrown but a great sadness remained in the people's hearts. The great sadness remaining in the people's hearts became a legend that will never fade.

Each line contains a piece of the previous line and makes a new statement out of it. It's a language exercise, not a literary one. But it's hard not to think of the Digital World when reading it.

Upamon, hiding in Iori's desk, wipes a tear from his eye.

Upamon: Native Language class always makes me want to cry-dagyaa!

Nope. None of that. Iori pushes Upamon deeper into the desk to silence him.

Yes, it's called Native Language class. The word 日本語 Nihongo refers to the Japanese language while 国語 Kokugo means the native language of the region you are in. So, in 日本 Nihon, Japan, the 国語 Kokugo would be 日本語 Nihongo. But if you went to 英国 Eikoku, England, then 国語 Kokugo would be 英語 Eigo, English.

In Japanese schools, the study of Japanese is 国語の授業 Kokugo no Jugyou, Native Language Class. Most places with a robust education system have some form of 国語の授業 Kokugo no Jugyou; It's just that the 国語 Kokugo we study in different regions are different languages.

It's like how Americans sometimes call it "Language Arts class" instead of "English class". It's a better, more universal terminology.

In the dub:

Cody: And so the kingdom was saved. But there was no joy in the land that day for the king had died. In his effort to save his people, he mistakenly stood on the wrong side of the cannon as it was being fired. The people watched in shock as the king flew overhead. Upamon: Gee, Cody, you couldn't be a little more depressing, could ya? Cody: Shhh! (Cody stuffs Upamon in the desk)

Cody is reading a literary textbook. A hilariously morbid one, at that. Holy shit.

"There was no joy in the land that day because of the hilarious Looney Tunes demise of their lord. Royal blood and viscera rained down upon all who came to witness his glory. One man got hit in the face with a femur and let out a yelp."

Obviously, this does not bear any sort of thematic resonance to the recent victory against the Digimon Emperor.

Next, we turn to Miyako in chemistry class, holding up a flask.

Miyako: Take this fluid. Add it to the other chemical in the beaker and then heat them over an alcohol lamp.

She pours the solution in and heats them.

Miyako: There! Now we just have to wait three minutes.

Outside the window, Poromon is watching her. He has concerns.

Poromon: Uhhh, that seems kind of dangerous....

Suddenly, the boiling fluid starts putting out purple smoke.

Poromon: Huh?

The smoke then turns to smoke rings. Miyako stares at the rings, transfixed, but the rest of the class is smart enough to run.

Poromon: EYEEEEEEGH!!! Students: LOOK OUT!!!

The concoction explodes right in Miyako's face, covering her in soot.

Miyako: Errors have been made.

Don't worry, Miyako. It's not your fault. It's the fault of the Coalition of Fictional Chemistry Teachers who make it standard practice to let children mix dangerous chemicals unsupervised.

In the dub:

Yolei: Pay attention, everybody! I take this tube of hydro-something stuff and add it to this beaker of a few things I threw together. I let it simmer for a bit. Now the experiment is almost complete! I'm thinking of doing some tutoring in chemistry after school if any of you boys are interested.... (Beaker starts to smoke) Poromon: Uh-oh! Boy: Is it supposed to smoke that much!? Yolei: Uhhh, of course! It's just the fluorodicarbonate polyethylene. (Smoke rings; Everyone screams and runs, followed by explosion) Yolei: Ehehehe....

I like that they roped in Yolei's love-starved trait. She tries to use her volatile concoction to flirt only for it to literally blow up in her face. I don't think any of those boys will be taking her up on that offer.

So that's what they're doing in 3rd and 6th grade. Time to check in on the 5th-graders. In the gym, Hikari is doing ballet. Chibimon, Patamon, and Tailmon watch from the rafters.

Tailmon: I want to dance too. Patamon: Will you dance with me? Tailmon: Yeah!

Neither of them know how to do ballet but they flop around and have fun. Beneath them, Chibimon feels left out.

Chibimon: You two have fun, then! Hmph!

Here's our first hint at what's going to be a driving source of conflict for this episode. That's right, it's time to talk about the Takeru/Hikari/Daisuke triangle.

The girls' ballet lessons end almost as soon as we get to the gym, though, and now it's time for boys' basketball. We see a few practice shots taken at the basket. Two balls whiff the basket while a third one goes in.

From their body language, it seems Daisuke sunk the successful shot; Takeru and another boy look distraught while Daisuke proudly spins a basketball on his finger. Then the whistle blows.

Daisuke: Hehehe.... Chibimon: (excited) The boys' basketball game is about to start!

The boys square up against each other, with Daisuke and Takeru on opposing teams. The girls file off to the side. Hikari and two other girls watch eagerly as the match begins.

In the dub:

Patamon: Kari is such a graceful dancer! Gatomon: She should be. I taught her everything she knows! Patamon: Teach me! Gatomon: Okay! (They start dancing) DemiVeemon: I forgot my dancing shoes! Hmph!

The dub's take on the ballet scene cuts out the romantic connotation to Patamon asking Tailmon to dance. So it's not really clear why DemiVeemon is suddenly acting so pissy.

The dub uses extra dialogue to clarify that it was Davis who made that shot.

Davis: You guys are lame! Watch me! (Ball sinks) Davis: Nothing but net! Not only am I the best soccer player in school; I'm the best basketball player too! (Davis spins the ball on his finger) Davis: Hehehe.... Chibimon: Is there anything in the real world that Davis isn't the best at? Gatomon: Yeah. Being modest.

All this extra dialogue is setup for the impending match between Davis and T.K. There are other players on the field, but comparing Daisuke/Davis and Takeru/T.K. is the purpose of this scene.

At the serve, Takeru claims the ball and dribbles around the opposing players.

Patamon: Keep it up, Takeru!

Daisuke moves in to stop him, but Takeru's incredible footwork allows him to dart around Daisuke and move in on the basket.

Patamon: SHOOT!!!

Takeru takes the shot and sinks it.

Patamon: YIPPEE!!! Tailmon: NICE SHOT!!! Chibimon: Daisuke could do that too, y'know. Hikari: TAKERU-KUUUUUUN!!!

With everyone cheering him on, Takeru high fives his other teammate.

Takeru: Yes! We did it!

A fantastic play by Takeru. Daisuke may be a strong soccer player but he's in Takeru's thunderdome now.

In the dub, Kari announces the start of the match since they changed DemiVeemon's dialogue.

Kari: The basketball game's about to start. GO T.K.!!! Referee: (whistles) Jump ball! (T.K. claims the ball and dribbles down court) Patamon: Air T.K.! T.K.: Try to stop me, Davis! If you can! (T.K. dribbles around Davis, then goes up for the shot) Patamon: Don't pose for pictures; Shoot it! (The ball goes in) Patamon: Two points! Gatomon: YAY!!! DemiVeemon: I guess anybody can get lucky against Davis once! Kari: NICE SHOT!!! T.K.: Teamwork, baby! (T.K. high fives his partner) T.K.: Yeah!

"Don't pose for pictures" is an Abridged Parody riff on the animation. They hang dramatically on that shot of Takeru preparing to fire, and Dub Patamon accuses him of actually doing that diegetically.

I really like the "Teamwork, baby!" line as he high fives his partner. That's good sportsmanship.

But one person isn't impressed.

Daisuke: That smug Takeru thinks he's so cool. Alright!

Determined to prove himself, Daisuke gets back in the game. He catches the basketball and dribbles past an opposing team member.

Chibimon: DAISUKE, SHOOT!!!

Against an opposing team member, Daisuke finds himself blocked the way he tried to block Takeru. He tries to slip past, trips over his own foot, and crashes face-first into the floor. The ball goes flying.

Tailmon & Patamon: Ahahahahahahaha-- Chibimon: STOP LAUGHING!!!

Daisuke, embarrassed, picks himself up off the court and glances over at the girls, who are all stifling laughter of their own.

Hikari: (snicker) We should go start our dance routine over.

Hikari herds the girls away from Daisuke's shame. Takeru approaches him, offering a hand up.

Takeru: Are you okay, Daisuke-kun?

Daisuke ignores the offered hand and picks himself up.

Daisuke: Obviously, I'm not okay. Takeru: What's wrong? Daisuke: Hmph!

Refusing to answer, Daisuke turns away from Takeru just in time to take a basketball to the face. He's not having a good day.

Yesterday, he vanquished the Digimon Kaiser once and for all. Today, basketball butt monkey. It's not easy being Daisuke.

In the dub:

Davis: Guys, we need to learn to pass the ball! Now let's do it! (Davis catches the ball and dribbles down court) DemiVeemon: GO DAVIS!!! (Davis trips over his own foot and faceplants) Gatomon & Patamon: Ahahahahahahaha-- DemiVeemon: IT'S NOT THAT FUNNY!!! (All the girls are laughing) Kari: Come on, I think Davis needs a little more time to practice. (T.K. offers Davis a hand up) T.K.: Hey Davis, do you need a hand? (Davis picks himself up) Davis: No, I need a team that knows how to pass the ball! T.K.: I think they're starting to learn. Davis: Hm? (Davis turns around and takes a basketball to the face)

This version doesn't have the symmetry of both Patamon and Chibimon respectively cheering for their Partner to shoot.

Hikari tries to spare Daisuke's feelings by driving the girls away, while Kari mocks Davis.

Daisuke is jealous and spiteful of Takeru for outperforming him in basketball. This, again, sets up a significant conflict for this episode. Davis is fine with T.K., but mad at his team over insufficient ball passing. This sets up the gag of the ball hitting him in the face, but is an odd thing for him to complain about in context when what went wrong was him tripping over himself.

So the dub traded out setup for a core theme of the episode to try and make an existing gag funnier.

The ringing of the school bell heralds the end of the day. Time to hit computer club.

Miyako and Iori meet in the stairwell.

Iori: Ah! Miyako-san! Miyako: Iori!

Together, they sprint down the hall and into the clubroom, where the fifth-graders are waiting for them.

Daisuke: You're late! Miyako: Huh? Takeru: Miyako-san, Daisuke-kun's been in a bad mood for a while now. Please just hurry up and open the Gate. Miyako: Hrm.

Miyako goes to the computer and pulls up the Digital Gate.

Miyako: DIGITAL GATE, OPEN!!! CHOSEN CHILDREN, LET'S ROLL!!!

Crossing over, the Chosen Children arrive in a forest in the Digital World.

Iori: (contemplative) Even with the Digimon Kaiser gone, we can still enter the Digital World.... Miyako: What's that supposed to mean? The Digital World is finally at peace! We can just enjoy the Digital World from now on, right? Takeru & Iori: Eh... Well.... Miyako: You're with me, right, Hikari-chan? Hikari: Uh, sure....

Iori raises a valid concern. Last time the Chosen Children were needed, the Digital World basically told them to hit the bricks as soon as the task was complete. So the fact that we can still come and go from the place is a little concerning.

In the dub:

Cody: Oh, I'm late I'm late I'm late! I'm late! I'm late I'm late I'm LATE!!! (Yolei and Cody meet in the hall) Yolei: (cheerfully) We're late.

The dub has the school bell ring here. Which is an odd place to put it. If they were on their way to a class, then this would support how late they are because the bell means class has started. But since it's the end of the school day, doesn't that mean they skipped the last few minutes of their classes and are in fact early?

(Cody and Yolei sprint into the clubroom) Davis: LOOK WHO'S HERE!!! T.K.: Davis is in a bad mood. Let's hope things are better in the Digital World. He's already had one nasty trip today! Yolei: Hrm. Is everybody ready? (Yolei pulls up the Digi-Port) Group: YEAH!!! Yolei: Then let's do it! DIGI-PORT, OPEN!!!

"He's already had one nasty trip today!" Goddammit, that got me. XD Good passive-aggressive burn, T.K.

The dub takes its first commercial break as the kids are crossing over. We return to find them in the woods.

Cody: You know, I'm surprised that now, with the Digimon Emperor gone, we're still able to come to the Digital World. Yolei: Of course we can still come here! I don't know about the rest of you but with the Digimon Emperor gone, I plan on having a little fun in the Digi-Sun! Don't you think we deserve it!? Cody & T.K.: Well, yeah! Yolei: How about you, Kari? Do you agree with me? Kari: Uhhh....

This is almost perfect, but they seem to have missed that Iori and Takeru are not onboard with Miyako's assertion. Cody and T.K. deliver their lines like they're in full agreement, though their faces clearly suggest otherwise. But they did catch that Hikari was only humoring her.

There is one person willing to cast his vote in Miyako's favor, however. And that should probably be reason enough to rethink her stance.

Daisuke: You're right, Miyako. However, we didn't come to the Digital World to play today. Miyako: I know that! We're volunteering to help with the reconstruction. Daisuke: We're partly responsible for the damage that's been done to the Digital World, after all.

Daisuke has a stronger sense of international responsibility than many actual world leaders. We won the war against the Digimon Kaiser and that's great and all. However, we left several places in ruin while we were having fun kicking his ass and knocking down his Dark Towers. So we now have an obligation to help rebuild what our conflict with him destroyed.

That the Kaiser was himself a Chosen Child only heightens that responsibility. If an English general went rogue and annexed Romania and then the English army bulldozed several Romanian cultural sites to drive him out, Romania would reasonably expect some restitution from England.

Iori: Miyako-san, what is the damage report for the Digital World? Miyako: Let's see... I'll check the D-Terminal.

Apparently the D-Terminal can give you sitrep now. That's a new function.

Miyako: There's the mountain region....

Brief cut to a group of Gotsumon knocking down trees and excavating the mountain for materials.

Takeru: We'll go there. Patamon: Sounds good, Takeru. Daisuke: Alright, Takeru will handle the mountain region.

Makes sense to send one of the fliers up that way.

In the dub:

Davis: There'll be plenty of time for rest and relaxation later, Yolei! But that's not why we came to the Digital World today. Yolei: I know, I know. We're here to restore the Digital World to the way it was before the Digimon Emperor took over. Davis: That's right! There's a lot of areas that are in pretty bad shape and we're part of the reason for it. We have to get to work! Cody: Alright, Yolei, give us a damage report on all the different areas. Yolei: Okay, let me pull it up on the D-Terminal. (Yolei takes out her D-Terminal) Yolei: The mountain area is pretty bad. (Brief cut to Gotsumon working) Gotsumon: Let's get back to work, boys! Don't leave any stone unturned even if it's your cousin! (Back to the kids) T.K.: I guess then... We'll take it. Patamon: The Gotsumon rock! Davis: Okay, Patamon and T.K. will handle the mountains.

They add a couple gags with the Gotsumon but they follow the script perfectly. Despite the foul mood he's in, Davis even refrains from the running gag of saying T.K.'s name wrong on purpose; The dub understands that now that we're here, he's in Serious Business mode. There are bigger things happening than his petty rivalry.

What else have you got for us, Miyako?

Miyako: Next up is the city. That place was hit pretty hard.

Cut to a ruined metropolis. Buildings line in rubble, some knocked over entirely or bombed out. RedVegiemon is there running a soup kitchen, providing curry to Gazimon refugees.

Armadimon: AHH LET'S GO LET'S GO LET'S GO-DAGYAA!!! IORI!!!

Armadimon runs off without another word, forcing Iori to run after him.

Iori: Ah, wait up, Armadimon! Daisuke: Aw, crap! They already took that one.

City region is assigned to Iori. Better luck next time, Daisuke.

Miyako: Next up is the rural countryside.

There, we see Gekomon tilling the rice paddies. Otamamon gather around a river, though it's unclear what exactly they're doing. I assume they're irrigating. A group of Bakemon show up carrying a log, adding it to a bridge under construction across the river.

Daisuke: Guess it's our turn now. Hikari: Wait! I want that one too. Tailmon: Yeah. Daisuke: Alright, then let's play Rock-Paper-Scissors for it. Hikari: Sounds good. Daisuke: (chanting) Starting at Rock! JAN KEN PON!!!

最初はグー Saisho wa guu is a customary phrase to begin a match of じゃんけん Janken. Players all begin with the closed fist of Rock. The three syllabic steps of じゃんけんぽん Jan Ken Pon then serve as a rhythmic countdown to when the players will throw their signs, delivered in the same cadence as 最初はグー Saisho wa guu.

English-speakers have similar countdowns with "Rock Paper Scissors!" or "Rock Paper Scissors Shoot!' but the melodic nature of the Japanese language makes their countdown exceptional.

Daisuke throws Rock to Hikari's Paper, so Hikari wins. Daisuke groans while Hikari high fives Tailmon.

Daisuke: Augh, I lost! Hawkmon: Next is the lake, right? Daisuke: V-mon and I will take the lake!

Once that's decided, Hikari, Takeru, and Daisuke scatter in separate directions. There is no glimpse of what's happening at the lake this time.

Miyako: All that's left is the coastal region. Hawkmon: Then I guess that one is ours, Miyako-san.

Similar to the lake, there is no glimpse of the coast. They just take it.

Just like that, the map is divvied up. Again, despite the bad day he's having, we can see how serious Daisuke is about this reconstruction. He loses out on the region he wants twice but he just rolls with the punches and takes what he can get with minimal complaint. This isn't about him.

In the dub:

Yolei: Next is the city. Wow, that looks in pretty bad shape too. (Cut to destroyed city) RedVegiemon: Form a single line, everybody. And no cutting in! Today's entree will be tuna surprise. Unfortunately, we didn't have any tuna. THAT'S THE SURPRISE!!! (Back to the kids) Armadillomon: Didja hear that, Cody? You get a free lunch. Let's go! (Armadillomon runs off with Cody chasing after) Cody: Wait for me! Davis: Aw man, he beat me to it!

Armadillomon doesn't quite match Armadimon's explosive enthusiasm but the idea is still there.

Yolei: Let's take a look at the farmlands. (Cut to farmlands) Gekomon: Alright, you Bakemon, a little to the left! ...now a smidge to the right! That's it! Easy does it! (The Bakemon add their log to the bridge) Gatomon: Haha, yeah! (Back to the kids) Davis: Okay then, we'll take that one. Kari: Wait! I wanted that area. Gatomon: Me too! Davis: The only fair thing to do is Rock-Paper-Scissors. Kari: Let's do it! Davis: Just so you know, I was champion in the fourth grade! HUAAAAGH!!! (Kari wins) Davis: Aggggh! Gatomon: Yay!

Davis does not offer any cadence and just expects Kari to know when to throw. He set himself up for failure with that one.

Hawkmon: The next area is the lake. Davis: Veemon and I will take that one! (Everyone scatters) Yolei: The only area left is the beach. Hawkmon: Alright, it's settled then! You and I are headed to the beach!

Overall, this is another pretty good adaptation. They stay on point and resist the urge to shit on Davis any harder than his No Good Very Bad Day already is.

Just like that, all assignments are divvied up. A map of the region shows us where each Chosen Child is assigned to work.

The map is followed by a montage of Chosen Children working through the day. Takeru and Patamon up in the mountains are helping with crops. Takeru plants while Patamon flies around the field with a watering can.

Over at the coast, Miyako and Hawkmon are helping dredge up debris. A team of Gizamon push a broken canoe up from the water, while Woodmon on shore pull it with a rope. Miyako and Hawkmon have joined in the pulling, though Hawkmon is contributing nothing to this exercise.

Hawkmon: I CAN'T PULL!!!

Miyako is helping. Hawkmon is dangling. But at least he tried.

In the dub, there's more dialogue to the montage.

(T.K. plants a sprout) T.K.: Okay, Patamon. (Patamon waters; Cut to coast) Yolei: Woodmon, you pull, and Gizamon, you push. Get it right this time. Go! (Yolei and Hawkmon help pull)

They take out the gag of Hawkmon lamenting his uselessness and instead blame the Woodmon and Gizamon for some reason. That's just good old-fashioned American nepotism right there.

In the city region, Iori helps RedVeggiemon stir the cookpot. Armadimon shows up with a bundle of kindling tied to his back, collapsing in front of the pot.

Armadimon: Ugh, if you don't work, you don't eat-dagyaa.

At the lake, Daisuke and V-mon help a group of RedVeggiemon carry cut logs. Unfortunately, a group of Numemon have taken up residence on top of the stack.

Daisuke: Move, Numemon! You're in the way!

The Numemon depart from the log pile, but leave poops behind. Thanks. That's great. Assholes.

And finally, Hikari and Tailmon help the Gekomon harvest water from the river.

In the dub:

(Armadillomon collapses in front of the cookpot) Armadillomon: Ugh. This is hard work. So much for a free lunch. (Davis and the others bring a log for the pile) Davis: Come on, Vegiemon! Lift! You've got to put some backbone into it! Oh. I forgot you don't have one.

Again, the dub has the kids chewing out the Digimon they're helping for inadequate work performance. Something about that rubs me the wrong way.

For Davis, it's used as a replacement for the Numemon poop bit, which the dub snips out the footage of. -1 Poop joke, +1 Digimon anatomy joke.

As Hikari and Tailmon pull up the water bucket, they suddenly hear someone calling for them.

Patamon: TAILMON!!! Girls: Huh? Takeru: HIKARI-CHAAAAAAN!!!

Takeru and Patamon come running over the log bridge that the Bakemon recently built. Which is quite a feat given that they were on opposite ends of the map from Hikari and Tailmon. Do we think Takeru Solid Snaked it past Daisuke? Or did he go the long way through Iori or Miyako territory?

Either way, what he's not doing is his fucking job. He and Patamon planted like three crops and then booked it. For shame.

Hikari: Takeru-kun? Tailmon: What's wrong, Patamon? Patamon: Takeru's worried. There's something weighing on his mind. Hikari: What are you worried about? Takeru: That we can still enter the Digital World. Hikari: That's because we're still needed in the Digital World, right? Takeru: That was certainly the case three years ago. Hikari: So how about now? Patamon: Are we still needed here? Tailmon: We're needed to help with reconstruction for the destroyed Digital World, aren't we? Hikari: Ultimately, we're just volunteering for the reconstruction effort.... Takeru: The fact that we can enter the Digital World means that the Digital World still needs us. A crisis is approaching. Hikari: You mean a new enemy? Takeru: I don't know, but I think we should tell the others about it. Hikari: Yeah.

The veterans remember the escalation from the first series and then whoops none of those guys were actually the guy, THIS is the guy.

I'm glad Takeru spent half an hour slowly moving past Daisuke under cover of a cardboard box so he could deliberate with Hikari about whether to tell Daisuke that they're in danger. He didn't even really consult her on anything. He just came here and told her, "This is what I think. Anyways, let's brief the team."

I think he just wanted to get out of planting crops.

In the dub:

Patamon: GATOMON!!! Girls: Huh? T.K.: KARI!!! (T.K. and Patamon come running) Kari: What's wrong? Gatomon: Patamon, is a dog chasing you? Patamon: No! Listen up. T.K. has a theory that I think we should all listen to. Kari: What is it? T.K.: I was thinking about what Cody said about still being able to come to the Digital World. Kari: I thought we figured out that we can come here because we're still needed for something, didn't we?

We did not. I don't know where you got that impression. This is the first mention of us still being needed for something. Figuring that out is the purpose of this conversation we are having right now.

T.K.: That's the reason we were able to come here the first time. Patamon: You're right. There must be a reason this time too. Gatomon: The reason's as plain as the whiskers on my face; We're here to clean up the mess left by the Digimon Emperor. Kari: The only problem with that theory is that we volunteered for the work. It's not like we were drafted. T.K.: Exactly! That's the part that's been bothering me. We're not meant to be here as a cleanup crew. There's something else out there that we don't know about yet. Kari: T.K., you mean... a new enemy!? T.K.: I'm not exactly sure what it is yet but I think we should be prepared for whatever's out there waiting for us. Kari: Mhm.

Apart from Kari bizarrely thinking we've already had this conversation, this is pretty good.

Setting out to collect the others, Takeru and Hikari find the lake region vacant. Daisuke is nowhere to be found.

Patamon: Huh? There's no one here. Hikari: That's weird. Where did they all go? Patamon: HEEEEEEY!!! COME OUT OF HIDING!!! Takeru: DAISUKE-KUUUUUUN!!! Tailmon: V-MOOOOOON!!!

But no answer comes. What dire fate might have befallen--

Oh, no, scratch that. Daisuke and V-mon went for a walk in the bamboo forest. They're fine. Daisuke's just a little out of it.

Daisuke: Hey, V-mon? You've probably noticed already but... why are Takeru and Hikari-chan so tight-knit?

What exactly does Daisuke mean by that? Well, the language used here is あんなに仲がいい an'nani naka ga ii. 仲がいい Naka ga ii means two people who get along very well. They can be friends, lovers, coworkers, peers; The term does not define a particular type of relationship. What matters is that they support each other with minimal conflict.

あんなに An'nani basically means "like that". To that extent.

So Daisuke isn't specifically defining any sort of relationship for them, though he does have suspicions. But with this line, he is questioning how it is that Takeru and Hikari get along that well. They're two peas in a pod. They support each other relentlessly and are totally on the same page all the time, and it's weird.

Daisuke flashes back on the way Hikari cheered for Takeru at the basketball game. This is a rare instance of a flashback with dialogue.

Hikari: TAKERU-KUUUUUUN!!! Takeru: Yes! We did it! (End Flashback) V-mon: Patamon and Tailmon too....

V-mon flashes back on Patamon and Tailmon dancing.

V-mon (V.O.): They get along really well....

The boys let out a mutual sigh.

In the dub:

Patamon: Uh-oh. Everybody's gone.... Kari: That's really strange. They were all here just a minute ago. Patamon: Okay! If you're hiding, we give up! You can come out now! Ollie Ollie Oxenfree! T.K.: DAVIS!!! VEEMON!!! (Cut to bamboo forest) Davis: Hey, Veemon? Have you noticed how chummy T.K. and Kari are together? Why do you think that is? Veemon: Maybe they're identical twins that look completely different! Davis: For example, did you see how Kari was openly rooting for T.K. when we played basketball? Huh.... (Flashback) Kari: I!!! LOVE!!! YOU!!! T.K.!!! T.K.: YEAH!!! (End Flashback) Veemon: Funny, I don't quite remember it like that. (Flashback) Veemon (V.O.): I was too busy watching Gatomon. (End Flashback, collective sigh)

Obviously, Kari didn't say that in the original scene. But for once, that's on purpose. We're seeing Davis's jealous interpretation of that scene rather than a literal flashback.

Daisuke: V-mon! V-mon: What is it, Daisuke?

Daisuke crouches down and grabs V-mon's hands.

Daisuke: We have to work together. V-mon: Work together? Daisuke: We'll come up with something really cool! V-mon: Really cool! Daisuke: And that will bring me closer with Hikari.

Daisuke fantasizes about doing a slam dunk while Hikari cheers for him. Then he front-flips over in front of her and throws up two V for Victories.

V-mon: And I'll get closer with Tailmon.

V-mon fantasizes about waltzing with Tailmon while holding a rose in his mouth.

V-mon: (singsong) TAILMOOO~OOON!!!

With both boys drunk on their fantasy, we return to reality.

Daisuke: The only way this happens, V-mon, is if you evolve into your Adult form. V-mon: Evolve to my Adult form? Daisuke: Something like UltraAngemon.

THAT'S RIGHT, FUCKOS. Remember UltraAngemon? It's an evolution Daisuke pulled straight out of his ass in a jealous fervor. He invented the concept of UltraAngemon way back in episode 7, the Andromon episode, after witnessing Patamon evolve into Angemon for the first time. With the Digimon Kaiser defeated, it's finally time for UltraAngemon to make his debut!

The boys take a moment to picture what UltraAngemon will look like. It's basically Angemon if he flew through a rainbow and got tie-dyed.

V-mon: Got it! Are you ready for me to become UltraAngemon!?

Daisuke laughs and claps at V-mon humoring him. I don't think they're really serious about this UltraAngemon thing; They're just venting some of their stress by goofing around. Daisuke is serious about V-mon evolving to Adult, though.

In the dub:

Davis: Augh.... Veemon: We're not that popular. (Davis crouches down and grabs Veemon's hands) Davis: If we want Kari and Gatomon to like us, we've gotta change. Veemon: What do you have in mind? Davis: We have to be better at the things they like. Veemon: Like what? Davis: I have to learn to become a better basketball player. (Fantasy Davis dunks) Kari: Yay! Davis: KARI LOVES ME!!! YEAH!!! (End Flashback) Veemon: And I have to learn to be a better dancer. (Veemon flashback) Gatomon: (swooning) Veemon.... (End Flashback) Davis: I got it! Just Digivolve into a Champion Digimon who happens to be a great dancer! Veemon: A regular twinkletoes! Davis: Yeah, right? I can just picture it now! (Imagine spot of UltraAngemon) Davis: Angemon would have nothing on you! Veemon: Here goes! VEEMON DIGIVOLVE TO CHAMPION MEGADANCERMON!!!

The dub didn't quite lay the groundwork for UltraAngemon. It sort of did; Davis did tell Veemon to Digivolve into "AngeSomething" in their version of that scene. But it seems they found it easier just to break away from that gag entirely here, inventing the new hypothetical form of MegaDancermon.

In the original, Daisuke just suggests that they need to "do something cool". The fantasies are them expressing their respective jealousies; Daisuke fantasizes about Hikari cheering for his basketball prowess like she did for Takeru and V-mon fantasizes about Tailmon dancing with him instead of with Patamon.

The plan is:

Step 1: Evolve V-mon into a super cool Adult form that impresses the girls so that they like US now!

Step 2: And then we'll be the ones they do these specific things we're salty about with instead of Takeru and Patamon!

The dub tries to merge those into the same step. Davis describes these activities as "things they like", which he and Veemon must improve at. Then they joke around about evolving Veemon into MegaDancermon to achieve that goal for him.

And, for Veemon, that makes sense. But. Uh. I don't think his logic follows for Kari. Kari wasn't cheering for T.K. because he's good at basketball. She was cheering at the basketball game to support T.K. So that's awkward, but in a way that can just be the character's mistake. Daisuke/Davis is meant to be off his rocker here either way.

Suddenly, Daisuke and V-mon's jubilation is interrupted by a presence nearby. Alerted by the scattering of birds, they whip around to see a horrifying creature emerging from the bamboo forest.

A creature that is clearly a bunch of Numemon in a trenchcoat but we'll humor them. After a commercial break, the creature lunges forward and reveals itself to be of a colossal height.

They kind of look like they're wearing a makeshift Monzaemon outfit.

Daisuke: HELP ME, V-MON!!!

Daisuke pushes V-mon forward towards the creature and darts to the side, out of the way.

V-mon: DAISUKE!!! Daisuke: V-mon, evolve into your Adult form! V-mon: S-Sure...

V-mon spins in place while trying to call out his evolution phrase.

V-mon: V-MON SHINKAAAAAA-YA-YA-ya-yaaaaa....

He successfully dizzies himself and falls over. Victory for FakeMonzaemon.

Daisuke: Ugh, he can't evolve.

Oh well. Looks like we're doomed by the very real threat bearing down on us. Sucks.

Honestly, it's for the best. This kind of disingenuous shit is how you get SkullGreymons. Do you want SkullGreymons, Daisuke?

The dub also takes its commercial break here before commencing the attack. When we return, Davis and Veemon drop some quips in before starting up the script.

Davis: That Digimon needs a new tailor! Veemon: He must have a hard time finding eyeglasses! Davis: LOOK OUT, A MONSTER!!! (Davis pushes Veemon towards it and runs) Davis: Don't just stand there! Try to Digivolve into a Champion! Veemon: VEEMON DIGIVOLVE TO... Doooyagh....

Even in the context of Davis staging this attack, the way he suddenly jumps from snarking on the creature's design to screaming and running for his life feels really awkward and inorganic.

With V-mon vanquished, it is time for the wrath of the fake Monzaemon thing!

Creature: Um, are we done here? Daisuke: Yeah, we're good. Thanks. Creature: You're welcome.

The monster tilts forward and its head comes off, spilling countless Numemon and RedVeggiemon out into a pile.

Daisuke: And after all the trouble you went to. Sorry about that. Group: Bye.

Daisuke and V-mon wave as the Digimon depart.

In the dub:

Creature: Can we stop now, Davis? It's getting really hot in here. Davis: Yeah, guess so. Nice job, guys. Creature: Gee, thanks, Davis. Everybody out! (Creature comes apart) Davis: Aww, you ripped your costume. And it was really good too. Group: Adios / See you later!

Davis compliments the costume instead of apologizing for the wasted effort.

Once they're gone, Daisuke turns on V-mon.

Daisuke: That was all your fault, V-mon! V-mon: How was that my fault!? Daisuke: It just is!

Daisuke punches V-mon in the top of his head.

V-mon: OW, WHAT THE HELL!?

V-mon breaks a bamboo stalk with a chop and then turns furiously on Daisuke.

V-mon: Now I'm really getting mad.... Daisuke: Uhh, sorry!

Daisuke turns and runs from his infuriated Partner. V-mon chases after him, roaring at him.

V-mon: COME BACK HERE, DAISUKE!!!

No dice. Daisuke flees from V-mon until he reaches a rope bridge. Once there, he stops and waits for V-mon while explaining his plan via internal monologue.

Daisuke: (thinking) Hehe... Next plan: Enrage V-mon and then break this suspension bridge and cause it to fall, thus putting me in a dire situation. Then, as a result of my brilliant plan, V-mon will have to evolve into his Adult form!

Okay, I joked about it earlier, but this is literally the SkullGreymon episode of the first series. Daisuke really is just doing the SkullGreymon plot again.

In the dub:

Davis: This is all your fault, Veemon! If you would have just Digivolved into a Champion, I never would have had to trick you!

The dub removes the part where Daisuke punches V-mon in the head.

Veemon: So that's it! (Veemon breaks a bamboo stalk) Veemon: You tried to scare me! (Davis runs for it and Veemon gives chase) Davis: WAAAAUGH!!! WELL, YOU USUALLY DIGIVOLVE WHEN YOU'RE SCARED!!! AHHHHHHH!!! (Davis reaches the bridge) Davis: Come on, Veemon! You're slower than the U.S. mail! I hope your Champion form runs faster than you do! Davis: (thinking) Hehe... And now it's time for Part 2 of Operation: Make Veemon Digivolve. I make Veemon mad and then, as I'm crossing this bridge, it breaks! And in order to save me from the fall, Veemon has to Digivolve to the Champion level. Perfect!

I would have gone with "Plan B" instead of "Part 2". The phrase "Part 2" implies that Davis intended to fail with the Monzaemon costume earlier. In the original, it's more clearly asserted that the bridge plan is a contingency for if the Monzaemon plan fails.

Additionally, losing the punch to the head makes Veemon's reaction seem more irrational here. He's chasing Davis with clear intent to do violence over what was basically a prank. Still a dick thing to go but not necessarily one that needs to escalate into physical violence.

Daisuke puts his plan into action by ripping the cord holding the bridge together. The now unstable bridge begins to shake.

Daisuke: AHHHHHH!!! SAVE ME, V-MON!!! V-mon: DAISUKE!!!

All thoughts of retaliation gone, Daisuke sprints across the bridge, screaming Daisuke's name with fear in his voice. Unfortunately, the shaking of the bridge proves too much for him and he falls on his face. The bridge snaps in half, forcing V-mon to leap across in order to reach the segment that Daisuke's holding onto.

Daisuke: V-MOOOOOON!!! V-mon: DAISUKEEEEEE!!!

Hanging onto the cord of the now destroyed bridge, Daisuke hits the cliffside hard but keeps a firm grip. V-mon manages to grab onto Daisuke's legs.

Daisuke: V-mon! You have to evolve into your Adult form! V-mon: V-mon... shinka....

Then all of a sudden, like magic....

...V-mon loses his grip and plunges into the river below. Daisuke follows shortly after.

I sure hope that isn't one of the bridges we just rebuilt or else Daisuke's going to have some explaining to do. In fact, just in general he's going to have a hard time explaining why he wandered off from a volunteer reconstruction assignment to go wreck things further.

Forget what I said earlier about Daisuke knowing there are bigger things happening here than his petty rivalry. This is kind of awful, Daisuke.

In the dub:

Davis: AHHHH!!! VEEMON, HELP ME!!! Veemon: Davis, hold on! (The bridge gives way) Davis: WHOAAAA-OHHHH!!! Veemon: DAVIS!!! (The boys end up dangling) Davis: Now, Veemon! You've got to Digivolve! Veemon: Veemon... Digivolve... To.... (The boys fall in the river) Veemon: (floundering) Was! This! Another! Trick!? Davis: (floundering) I would never! Do! Something like that!

The boys get a little extra dialogue at the end over what is, in the original, the both of them gasping for air while struggling to keep their heads afloat.

Washing up on the shore, Daisuke comes clean to V-mon.

V-mon: Huh? This was a practice exercise to get me to evolve into my Adult form? Daisuke: The plan was that if I put myself in danger, you would evolve into your Adult form and save me. V-mon: But it doesn't seem like it worked. Sorry, Daisuke. Daisuke: It's not your fault, V-mon. V-mon: No? Well then, we should probably head back to the others soon! Daisuke: Yeah.

V-mon bounced back from that pretty fast. Daisuke stands up, then offers V-mon a hand and helps him to his feet. Suddenly, they hear the sound of rumbling rocks nearby. Looking up, they see several rocks rolling down the cliff towards them.

Daisuke: Run, V-mon!

Daisuke starts running, but V-mon watches the rockslide curiously.

V-mon: This is another practice exercise to make me evolve into my Adult form, right? Daisuke: IT'S NOT PART OF THE PLAN!!! V-mon: WAAAAAAAUGH!!!

Now appropriately freaked out, V-mon books it before a massive boulder lands where he was standing. The boulder hits the ground rolling, pursuing Daisuke and V-mon.

Honestly, I'm surprised it took V-mon this long to realize something didn't smell right. The fact that Daisuke kept yelling "Evolve to your Adult form!" instead of yelling "DIGIMENTAL UP!!!" is a dead giveaway.

In the dub, Veemon already knows Davis has been trying to trick him so their discussion is a little different.

Veemon: But Davis, why did you want me to Digivolve into a Champion? Davis: Well, I thought that maybe Kari would like me more if my Digimon could reach the Champion level like T.K.'s can. Veemon: That's silly. Gatomon wouldn't like me more if you could Digivolve. Davis: Well, it couldn't hurt; She doesn't like you now! Veemon: Hey! That's not nice. I really wish you wouldn't rub it in. Davis: (conciliatory) Okay.

It feels a little awkward that Veemon's suddenly confused by this when they were just talking about MegaDancermon.

But it actually does make sense; They'd only been talking then about how Digivolving would benefit Veemon. That Davis is actually personally invested in Veemon Digivolving was not a topic of conversation before.

In the original, Daisuke clearly stated that V-mon becoming UltraAngemon would impress Hikari and Tailmon into liking them both more. But that idea had not been conveyed to Veemon in the dub until this moment.

Davis does come out of this conversation looking more like an asshole than Daisuke does, however, due to the "She doesn't like you now!" exchange. For Daisuke and V-mon, this is just a sweet reconciliation scene.

(Rockslide) Davis: RUN, VEEMON!!! (Davis runs) Veemon: This isn't another one of your tricks to get me to Digivolve into the Champion level, is it? Davis: NO!!! THIS TIME IT'S FOR REAL!!! RUN!!! Veemon: Waugh! (Veemon starts running too)

This part's perfect. No notes.

Fleeing from the boulder, Daisuke and V-mon run afoul of a Digimon that is clearly and unambiguously urinating on the ground beside the river.

Sure, that might as well happen. We've had so much poop so I guess it's about time. Thanks, show. Also, the spiky-shelled Digimon is laughing riotously about his pissing. I'm not sure what's so funny.

Digimon: Hehehehehe AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Daisuke and V-mon come running, pursued by the boulder.

Boys: AHHHHHH!!!

Upon reaching this Digimon piss puddle, they screech to a stop and then leap over it. They may be fleeing for their lives but stepping in that would just be gross.

Spotting the incoming boulder, the Digimon headbutts it up into the air. It lands and shatters on their hard shell.

V-mon: Awesome! Daisuke: Yeah, but we just saw them... peeing....

The Digimon whips around, letting out a furious roar.

Daisuke: And they seem mad about it!

Tortomon is an Adult-stage Vaccine-attribute Reptile Digimon. It's technically トータモン Toutamon but it's based on the English word トータス toutasu or "tortoise".

This is another rare instance where I feel like the dub actually gets the name right and the Digimon Reference Book gets it wrong. Officially, this Digimon is called "Tortamon" according to the Reference Book but. Like.

If we're going to correctly interpret トー tou as "tor" in this context then why wouldn't we extend that same leverage to タ ta? Tortomon's name is literally トータス toutasu with the ス su cut off and a モン mon glued on, so it feels arbitrary to interpret トー tou with the original word in mind but then take タ ta literally.

The dub goes with "Tortomon" for the English name, and that feels correct and natural.

In any case, new Digimon! Tortomon is from the Nature Spirits release of the Digimon Pendulum V-Pet. They were the other Vaccine Adult alongside Kabuterimon for Tentomon, Gotsumon, and Otamamon to evolve into.

Narrator: Tortomon! A tortoise-like Reptile Digimon with a sharp spiked shell. Their special attack is Shell Phalanx!

As an aside, their most notable feature is not being what Armadimon evolves into even though that would totally make sense. V-mon, Armadimon, and Hawkmon are all designed in a way that feels like new Child forms to existing Digimon (V-dramon, Tortomon, and Garudamon) but are all going in a separate direction with their Adult evolutions.

Though V-mon did evolve into V-dramon in the V-Tamer manga. And it's worth noting that Garudamon is a Perfect so it would still seem natural for Hawkmon's Perfect form to be that Digimon. Plus, Digimon evolutions being what they are, nothing's stopping them from branching that way, I suppose. Still, point is, it makes sense for them to evolve that way but in this show, they do not.

The dub has some editing to do in order to remove all shots of Tortomon's onscreen urination. As the boys approach, we get a closeup of Tortomon's face looking at them in surprise and then splice in a shot from later of Tortomon rearing up and trying to body slam them.

The impression is that the boulder chased us right into the clutches of an already hostile Digimon. Then, from there, we get the awesome moment of Tortomon destroying the boulder.

Veemon: That was close! Davis: It's a good thing he was here to block it. You were great, pal! (Tortomon turns around and roars) Davis: He doesn't take compliments well! Tortomon: (rundown) I am Tortomon! I'm a turtle-type Digimon but I hide my head from no one. I use my Strong Carapace attack to be hard on my enemies!

Lacking the urination bits, Davis has no reason to suspect Tortomon's hostility. Though you'd think Tortomon trying to body slam him a moment ago would be a clue.

Once the rundown's over, the boys are left having to unpack this awkward situation they've found themselves in.

Daisuke: Ack, I knew he was mad! V-mon: Who wouldn't be upset if someone walked in on them while they were enjoying a good piss? Daisuke: But it's not like we wanted to see that! Do you think they'll forgive us if we apologize, V-mon? Tortomon: NRRRRRRGREEEEEEEGH!!! V-mon: (flatly) Don't apologize. (cheerful) Oh, is this another plan to make me evolve?

Tortomon rears up on their hind legs, roaring furiously.

Tortomon: HRRRRRUUUUUUGH!!! Daisuke: IT'S NOT A PLAN!!! RUN!!!!

The boys bail before Tortomon slams back down onto the ground where they were standing. This is the shot that the dub used for the body slam earlier.

Yes, this really is what the third-act conflict is predicated on. Between Wormmon's death and the backstory of how the Digimon Kaiser came to be, this is a tension-relieving shenanigans episode.

In the dub:

Davis: Wow! This guy looks pretty angry! Veemon: I'd be pretty angry too if I had a boulder come at me like that! Davis: We didn't throw it! Veemon: He doesn't know that! Davis: Well, I'll just explain it to him and everything will be fine. Listen, you seem like a reasonable fellow. Let me tell you what happened. Tortomon: HYRRRRRGH! Veemon: Smooth move. Hey, how do I know that's not some Digimon in disguise trying to scare me? (Tortomon rears up) Tortomon: HRRRRRRUUUUUUGH!!! Veemon: Never mind! Davis: WAAAAAAUGH!!! (The boys bail before the body slam)

For their part, the dub credits the boulder itself as the source of Tortomon's ire. Which, to be fair, is a valid reason to be upset. Dub Tortomon feels under attack and is defending himself.

Back at the lake, all those Numemon and RedVeggiemon explain things to Hikari and Takeru.

Takeru: Huh? Daisuke and V-mon are practicing evolving to the Adult level? Hikari: Oh, Daisuke-kun... What is he thinking? Daisuke & V-mon: HELP US!!! Hikari: Daisuke-kun!? Tailmon: V-mon!

Daisuke and V-mon come running, joining the others before stopping to catch their breath.

Takeru: What has you so freaked out? Tortomon: RRRRRRRUUUUUUGH!!! MRRRRRRRMEEEEEEGH!!!

Despite Tortomon loudly storming through the woods, the embarrassing debrief continues.

Takeru: You said you "saw Tortomon while they were enjoying a good piss"!? Daisuke & V-mon: Yeah.... Hikari: Then this is all your fault, Daisuke-kun and V-mon. Tailmon: I think so too. Patamon: No argument here. V-mon: I knew you guys would say that.... Daisuke: (aside, bitterly) It's not like we could have avoided it! Who would want to see something like that? V-mon: (sigh) If only we hadn't-- Tortomon: RRAAAAAAGH!!!

Time's up. Tortomon's caught up and comes running.

In the dub:

T.K.: Let me get this straight. Davis is trying to trick Veemon so he'll Digivolve to the Champion level? Kari: Why does he always have some hair-brained scheme he's trying to pull off!?

...does he? I'm gonna have to drop a Citation Needed on Davis being a Bugs Bunny-esque troublemaker.

Davis & Veemon: WHOAAAAAA!!! Kari: What's the matter, Davis!? Gatomon: Veemon! (Davis and Veemon stop to catch their breath) T.K.: You guys look like you've seen a monster. Tortomon: NROOOOOOGH!!! HRAGH!!! HRAAAAAAGH!!! T.K.: So you think this Digimon is mad at you because he thinks you threw a boulder at him? Davis & Veemon: Uh-huh.... Kari: Why don't you guys just explain the situation to him? Gatomon: Start with Davis's lame plan. Patamon: And finish by saying you're sorry. Veemon: We tried that already!

They did. Unlike their Japanese counterparts, they have in fact tried that already.

Davis: (aside, bitterly) Of course, if Veemon would have Digivolved to the Champion level in the first place, none of this would have happened! Veemon: Again with the Digivolving thing? Tortomon: HRAAAAAAGH!!!

Here again we see a lot of pragmatic writing around the censored topic of Tortomon's urination. The most notable part is having to come up with a new reason for Davis to look off to the side and gripe.

This has the knock-on effect of again making Davis more of an asshole than Daisuke. After the bridge plan failed, Daisuke came clean to V-mon and dropped it. But here Davis is, dredging it back up to whine about it and shift the blame for his stupid plan.

As the furious Tortomon barrels towards them, Daisuke and V-mon scream and start running again. Hikari and Takeru take cover behind the log pile with the Digimon.

Tortomon: MMMMEEEEEERRRRRRGH!!!

As the creature storms off, Hikari and Takeru emerge.

Takeru: (amused) Everyone has times when they don't want anyone to see them, huh? Hikari: (serious) But are they going to be okay? Takeru: What do you mean? Hikari: We can't just leave them like this! Tailmon: Don't worry about it. They'll be fine! Patamon: Tortomon doesn't seem like such a bad guy.

Smash cut to Tortomon bearing down on Daisuke and V-mon, roaring and snarling all the while.

This conversation. XD Takeru says, "Oh those wacky kids." Hikari looks him dead in the eye and goes, "THEY'RE GOING TO DIE." And then the Digimon cut in like, "Nah, I like the cut of Tortomon's jib!"

Tortomon is going to trample Daisuke to death and Hikari is the only person who has a problem with that. XD

In the dub:

Tortomon: HRAAAAAAGH!!! (T.K. and Kari take cover while Tortomon stomps through) T.K.: Have you ever noticed that Davis always gets himself into these things?

I have not. What are you talking about?

Kari: Should we help them? T.K.: Nah. Kari: But how do we know that they'll be okay? Gatomon: Somehow, Davis always lands on his feet. Patamon: Besides, I don't think Tortomon is really that angry with them anyway.

Nonetheless, this conversation is just as hilariously unreasonable as in the original. T.K.'s short and simple "Nah" sent me.

In the city region, Iori's teaching kendo to the Gazimon because of course that's what he's doing.

Armed with sticks, Iori demonstrates an overhead strike, which the Gazimon then repeat.

Iori: MEN!!! Gazimon: MEN!!!

They repeat, calling out their strike and swinging a total of four times before they hear Daisuke's voice.

Daisuke: IORIIIIII!!! Iori: Daisuke-san and V-mon? Daisuke & V-mon: SAVE US!!!

Daisuke and V-mon take cover behind Iori, who brandishes his makeshift shinai.

Iori: I see! Tortomon: HROOOAAAAAAGH!!!

Then Iori actually sees what he's committed to fighting off. The Gazimon scream and scatter.

Iori: AHHHHHH!!! I... I don't think my kendo skills are up to this task. I'M SORRY!!!

Iori throws his stick on the ground and runs for it, abandoning Daisuke and V-mon to their fate. Tortomon crushes the stick underfoot while Iori and the Gazimon take cover inside a nearby stack of culverts. Armadimon cowers atop the culverts making his best attempt to just not be noticed; It works.

As Daisuke and V-mon flee with their pursuer once more, Iori peeks out from the culvert.

Iori: It's a good thing I backed down. There's no way I could have won that. Armadimon: No argument here-dagyaa!

Sorry, guys! Good luck!

In the dub:

Cody: Ready, 1! And 2! And 3! And 4! Davis: CODY!!! Cody: Huh? Hey Davis, what's the big hurry? Davis: We need help! (Cody brandishes his makeshift shinai) Cody: Ha! Hiyah!!! Tortomon: HRAGH!!! HOORAAAAAAGH!!! (Gazimon scatter) Cody: I've just remembered I've got to study for a big math test next Monday! Seeya! (Cody throws the stick down and hides until Tortomon passes) Cody: Boy, Davis sure has some strange ideas about how to have fun. Armadillomon: You can say that again!

The gag is the same in both versions. Iori/Cody initially acts tough and commits to defending Daisuke/Davis only to instantly fold once he lays eyes on the adversary. But the dub presents it in a quippier fashion.

At the coastal region, Miyako and Hawkmon are on a break. Miyako's checking her D-Terminal while Hawkmon knocks back some bottled water.

V-mon: SAVE US, HAWKMON!!! Daisuke: MIYAKOOOOOO!!!

Looking down the beach, Miyako holds up her D-Terminal.

Miyako: Iori sent me an email! Hawkmon: We don't have time to mess around! Daisuke: WE'RE NOT MESSING AROUND!!! V-mon: NO MESSING AROUND HERE!!! Miyako: (eyeroll) You guys are in the way so BUZZ OFF--ACK!!!

It's at that moment that the boys and Tortomon come into view. Upon recognizing the severity of the situation, Miyako and Hawkmon hide in one of the canoes they dredged up. Daisuke, V-mon, and Tortomon pass by.

Daisuke: "Buzz off"!? V-mon: That's so mean! Tortomon: HRAURGH!!!

As Tortomon passes, their size causes their heavy footfalls to slam down into the surf, drenching the boat Miyako and Hawkmon are hiding in. Once they're gone, Miyako and Hawkmon peek back out of the canoe, completely soaked and utterly speechless.

This scene's a little difficult to parse because when Miyako turns and looks at them, holding up her D-Terminal, and then Hawkmon berates them? It feels like they're supposed to be able to see the boys at that point. But then she clearly lays eyes on them and Tortomon for the first time at "Buzz off", when she suddenly reacts and hides.

In the dub:

Veemon: HAWKMON, YOLEI, HELP!!! Yolei: Cody sent me an email and said you had a small problem! Hawkmon: I. Would. Not. Call that. Small. Davis: YOLEI, QUICK!!! DO SOMETHING PLEASE!!! Veemon: YEAH!!! HELP US!!! HURRY!!! Yolei: While you guys are running around playing games, some of us are working. Now--ACK!!! (Yolei and Hawkmon hide) Davis: WE'RE NOT PLAYING GAMES!!! Tortomon: HRARGH!!!

The dub is just as awkward. Hawkmon explicitly sees Tortomon only for Yolei to suddenly notice a few lines later and for the pair to hide.

Continuing onward, Tortomon chases Daisuke and V-mon up a hill.

Daisuke/V-mon: HEEEEEELP!!! / STOP CHASING US!!!

Their luck finally runs out as they reach the edge of a cliff. With nowhere left for Daisuke and V-mon to run, Tortomon stops and catches their breath.

Daisuke & V-mon: Ugh, no more! Tortomon: RRRRRRG-- Daisuke: Wait, Tortomon! Tortomon: Hrm? Daisuke: Before you attack us, there's something I want to say. V-mon: What, our last requests?

Daisuke bows down low to Tortomon. V-mon quickly does the same.

Daisuke: We apologize for seeing you pee. V-mon: It's too late to apologize now! Daisuke: But before you attack us.... V-mon: Before? Daisuke: ...you should wash your hands. V-mon: WHAT!?!? Tortomon: NYRRGH!?

Goddammit, Daisuke. XD

Tortomon's as taken aback as V-mon at that. They rear back and look at their front paws in shock.

Daisuke: If you're going to attack us, wash your hands first. V-mon: WHAT ARE YOU SAYING, DAISUKE!?!? Daisuke: It's more hygienic that way, don't you think? V-mon: I do. But this isn't the time to be worrying about hygiene! Tortomon: MRRRRAAAAAAGH!!! V-mon: LOOK, YOU MADE THEM ANGRIER!!!

Good job, Daisuke. Way to further embarrass the furious murder turtle.

Anyways, that's the story of what ever became of Daisuke. He was never seen again after this point. Only Hikari missed him.

The dub adds some lines as they're running up the hillside.

Veemon: Davis! Please tell me this is just another trick! Davis: Do you think I'm smart enough to think up something like this!? Veemon: Good point!

V-mon/Veemon has brought up the possibility of Tortomon being another trick before, but only Daisuke answered that question definitively. Veemon retracted the question, so this is the first time Davis has actually answered it.

Davis/Veemon: Help! Please! Anybody! / SOMEONE HELP US!!! (Tortomon corners them on the cliff's edge) Davis: This is the end of the line, pal. (Tortomon gasps for breath) Davis & Veemon: He's got bad breath! Tortomon: RRRRRRGH!!!

Right where Daisuke interrupted Tortomon's attack, the dub takes its third commercial break. They roll back the footage on return and we start again from Davis and Veemon delivering their mutual line.

Davis & Veemon: Goodbye old friend! Tortomon: RRRRRRG-- Davis: Hold on! Tortomon, let me just say one thing. Tortomon: Hrm? Davis: I have one final request. Veemon: (hisses) What are you doing, Davis!? (Davis kneels in supplication) Davis: Shut up and get down here! Veemon: Oh boy. (Veemon does the same) Davis: I-I've always considered myself a very clean person. Veemon: Oh, really? It's a good thing he's never seen your room! Davis: Before you destroy us, could you do me a bit favor? Veemon: What? Davis: Would you mind washing your hands? Veemon: HUH!?!? Tortomon: NYRRGH!? (Tortomon looks at their hands) Davis: I don't want to get any bad germs or anything. Veemon: I wouldn't be worried about germs right now! Davis: If you've got a better idea, I'd be glad to hear it right about now! Veemon: Uh, Davis is right! Germs can be very dangerous, especially right-- Tortomon: MRRRRAAAAAAGH!!! Veemon: (flatly) I don't think he buys the whole germ theory.

Without the context that Tortomon was draining the lizard a moment ago, Davis asking him to wash his hands comes right out of left field. The dub plays it off by recontextualizing it; If you read between the lines, Davis is clearly attempting to trick Tortomon as a last-ditch plan to get away.

Whereas for Daisuke, this moment is pure comedic absurdity. He is entirely sincere. Yeah, we're gonna fight, but your hands are icky so can you wash up first?

It's also worth noting that Davis says Tortomon is going to "destroy" them while Daisuke only admits as much as 襲う osou, which means to attack or strike or assault. Davis says "Before you kill us" and Daisuke says "Before you try". He has two Digimentals in his back pocket and he's seen uglier.

Infuriated, Tortomon finally attacks.

Tortomon rears up and slams their left front paw down. Daisuke and V-mon split up, Daisuke breaking left while V-mon goes right. Tortomon turns to follow Daisuke, exposing their flank to V-mon.

Though he doesn't call the attack, V-mon dives in with a headbutt. Tortomon thwacks him with their tail, knocking the wind out of him as he hits the ground.

Daisuke: (worried) V-mon.... V-mon: (pained) Daisuke...!

Once they're satisfied that V-mon is down, Tortomon turns their attention to Daisuke.

Tortomon: RRRGH!!! Daisuke: V-mon! You have to evolve, V-mon!

When Daisuke holds up his D-3, holy light emanates from its screen. Getting his second wind, V-mon climbs back to his feet.

V-mon: Daisuke!

This time, it's sincere. Daisuke has the power now only because he genuinely means it.

In the dub, Veemon calls the attack.

Veemon: VEE HEADB--OOF!!! (Tortomon tail whips Veemon to the ground) Davis: VEEMON!!! Veemon: Why do I have a headache...? (Tortomon turns his attention on Davis) Tortomon: RRRGH!!! Davis: Teach this guy a lesson, Veemon! (Davis holds up his D-3) Veemon: Wow!

The difference is minor, but Davis sounds just a little too secure in his ability to do something that has not successfully worked before.

In any case, despite Daisuke's false starts before, it is now finally time. V-MON SHINKAAAAAA!!! And the first ever instance of Show Me Your Brave Heart playing for one of the three new kids.

Daisuke: V-MON EVOLVED TO THE ADULT LEVEL!!!

XV-mon is an Adult-stage Free-attribute Mythical Dragon Digimon. Like the letter V, the letter X is not a sound that comes naturally to the Japanese language and has to be phonetically spelled out. This means that the relatively simple XV-mon has to be named, in katakana, エクスブイモン Ekusubuimon.

Narrator: XV-mon! An Adult-stage Mythical Dragon Digimon that V-mon evolved into using his own innate power. His special attack is X Laser!

The narrator specifies that this evolution comes from V-mon's own power, as opposed to the Digimentals which borrow on the power of the others. This isn't Daisuke walking in the shadow of Taichi or Yamato; This is Daisuke, pure and unfiltered.

As XV-mon charges into battle, Tortomon lands the first hit. A headbutt to XV-mon's gut knocks him on his back. Tortomon follows up by stomping on his gut.

Before another stomp can be delivered, XV-mon counters with a kick to the head. His kick knocks Tortomon over onto their back. XV-mon scrambles to his feet and grabs Tortomon's tail, spinning him in the air before tossing him.

Tortomon hits the ground hard but recovers quickly and turns back around towards XV-mon.

Tortomon: SHELL PHALANX!!!

Yep! Despite being largely non-verbal, this Digimon actually does call attacks in the Japanese version! That's rare.

Shell Phalanx sounds like it'd be a defensive move but it's not. It's a rapid-fire spike shot from Tortomon's shell. But XV-mon's ready for it. He punches any spikes that come too close out of the air, ending with a side kick for the last spike.

In the dub:

Davis: YOU DID IT, VEEMON!!! YOU REACHED THE CHAMPION LEVEL!!! ExVeemon: (rundown) I feel like a new 'mon! Davis, wait 'til you see my Vee Laser attack! It'll make my Vee Headbutt look like a tap on the shoulder!

I don't know why they spell it like that. Or why they decided X Laser should be Vee Laser. He is no longer Vee. By the dub's admission, he is an ex-Vee.

The dub uses Let's Kick It Up for their insert song here. When ExVeemon kicks Tortomon to get him off, he calls that as an attack.

ExVeemon: EXVEE PUNCH!!! (ExVeemon gets Tortomon off and then throws him) Tortomon: STRONG CARAPACE!!!

Strong Carapace also sounds like a defensive move to me, so both versions are equal on that. ExVee Punch is a weird name for a kick.

When Shell Phalanx fails, Tortomon charges in for another tackle.

XV-mon leaps over the incoming Tortomon, kicking them in the back of the neck before hopping entirely over them. Tortomon crashes down on their face into the dirt.

Capitalizing on this opportunity, XV-mon whips around and lets loose with his special attack.

XV-mon: X LASER!!!

Exactly what it sounds like, the attack is an X-shaped beam emanating from the X/V symbol on XV-mon's chest. It hits Tortomon dead on. Tortomon pulls into their shell and tries to resist it, but the beam picks them up and carries them off the clifff. Tortomon plunges helplessly onto the beach far below. This battle is over.

In the dub, ExVeemon calls the kick he delivers to the back of Tortomon's neck.

ExVeemon: EXVEE KICK!!! (ExVeemon bounds off Tortomon) ExVeemon: VEE LASER!!!

At least this kick was an ExVee Kick and not another ExVee Punch. Though the existence of ExVee Kick and ExVee Punch only make the naming of Vee Laser all the more confusing.

With Tortomon bested, Daisuke takes a moment to celebrate.

Daisuke: YES!!! You're the best, XV-mon!

I love that Daisuke doesn't care even for a second that this is not UltraAngemon. That was a jealous whim. XV-mon is real, and that makes him a million times cooler than UltraAngemon could have ever been.

Suddenly, Tortomon down below starts rapidly spinning and charging up something.

Tortomon: hroooooAAAAAAUUUUUURGH!!!

And then they stop, emerge from their shell, and start giggling and pissing again. Daisuke and XV-mon quickly cover their eyes.

Daisuke: Don't look! Tortomon: Ehehehehe! AHAHAHAHA!!! Daisuke: We're not looking--huh?

Daisuke peeks through his fingers only to realize that Tortomon's finished. Tortomon washes their hands in the ocean.

Tortomon: Ehehehe! Daisuke: Tortomon properly washed their hands! They're not such a bad person when you get to know them. XV-mon: Yeah.

Okay, Daisuke. At least we know that Daisuke takes bathroom hygiene very seriously.

Tortomon departs, laughing to themself all the while. I wish I enjoyed anything half as much as they enjoy peeing.

In the dub, Davis trades Daisuke's unapologetic praise of XV-mon for a punny quip.

Davis: Tortomon has got to learn to come out of his shell! Tortomon: SPINNING ATTACK!!! YAAAAAAAAAAAA!!

Obviously, this footage of Tortomon peeing is removed too. We go straight to Davis and ExVeemon covering their eyes.

Davis: I can't watch! ...do I hear splashing? (Tortomon washes his hands) Davis: What do ya know? The big lug washed his hands after all! That's a good habit to get into!

This rapid spinning right before peeing isn't really explained. The dub compounds the confusion by having him call it as an attack only to never launch the attack.

Again, without the urination context, this resolution lacks any sort of rationale for why this would be how the fight ends. Though the original only makes marginally more sense.

With that settled, Daisuke and XV-mon return to the others. Daisuke rides on XV-mon's shoulder as they approach the team.

Hawkmon: So, are you done goofing off yet? Daisuke: I told you we weren't goofing off. Check it out! V-mon evolved into his Adult form XV-mon! Iori: That means we can rebuild much faster now. Miyako: We can work XV-mon and Daisuke extra hard! Team: YEAH!!! Daisuke: EH!?!?

Daisuke's so startled by this response, he slips off of XV-mon's shoulder and lands hard on his butt. We close on the team laughing merrily at Daisuke's expense! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

In the dub, Davis and ExVeemon get extra dialogue as the scene transitions.

ExVeemon: So this is what it feels like to be a Champion! Davis: Kinda like a great boxer, huh? Only with all your teeth.

OUCH. That was fucking harsh, Davis. XD

Davis: Everybody, I'd like you to meet ExVeemon! Champion Digimon Extraordinaire! Cody: I've always been fond of Veemon and I'm sure I'll like you as well. Yolei: Now our cleanup of the Digital World will go a lot faster! Let's put them to work! Team: ALRIGHT!!! Davis: HUH!?!? (Davis falls off and everyone laughs) Group: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Davis: Ha... haha... ha... What are you laughing at, ExVeemon!? Just because you're a Champion now, doesn't mean you know how to dance yet! Narrator: Is T.K. right about the DigiDestined having a new enemy? Find out next time on Digimon: Digital Monsters!

We might. I know next episode is Ken's big backstory reveal but I don't remember if we meet the new enemies there or not. I dunno. Gonna hold you to that one, Narrator.

Assessment: Like I said earlier, this is a breather episode. Shit was just very real for the last five episodes and it's going to go right back to being very real next episode, so this was an opportunity to dial it back and get into some low-stakes shenanigans.

Daisuke unlocks the first evolution that truly belongs to him of the series and it's oddly fitting that it's in such a goofball of an episode. I've said it before but Daisuke could totally rock the Digimental of Purity. For better and for worse, he wears his heart on his sleeve.

[elpeadro]

AHHHHHHHH HALF-TITAN LUZ IS A NEW DEVELOPMENT WITHIN THE STORY!!!!!!

You said you won't spoil, so you don't have to acknowledge this take at all, but I'm going to take my shot at it anyway, because of my brainrot with your story. Luz gains her Titan characteristics from one of two things. Either:

the direct exposure to the sheer magical power of the Calamity gems from Sasha capturing and carrying/dragging her away reawakens some dormant part of her that was formed when she took in Papa Titan's spirit to briefly become a full Titan and kill Belos. (Could possibly play into your pet theory about how all dimensional travel can be sourced back to the Guardian, who created the Titans. So Luz and her dormant Titan side coming into contact with the energy that birthed the Titans in the first place reignites that aspect.)

Darcy has been reading their way through the history of the Boiling Isles after capturing the Archive House at the beginning of Frogvasion, along with any government buildings or libraries in the main cities. This is how they learn about a human folkhero in this world of witches in the first place and why they send Sasha to bring Luz to them. Now, this next part hinges on the books Darcy has been reading mentioning that Luz briefly became part- or full-Titan in the battle with Belos. If so, their interest in her is the same as their interest in the Shadowfish or Mossmen: Luz is a special, unique creature with abilities they want to study and exploit, because having the blood of the primordial beings who make up the continents of this world is a great boon that they want to have for themself. So...yeah...'scientific experimentation' time, aka torture (but not senseless torture), to try and bring back out her Titan side and which ends up working. Sort of. (You can be sure as hell that Luz would sooner die than let it slip King is also a Titan - assuming that information isn't in the history texts. Or maybe the Core is only interested in Luz because she's shown the ability for a human body to adapt to Titan blood/powers.)

Are Sashanne just hella toxic in an always-negative sense where it's like "how the hell are they even together in the first place?", or are they toxic in that they have such extreme ups and downs where they can be lovey-dovey at times (at least physically and affectionately) but then quickly slip back into Sasha emotionally ignoring Anne and Anne trying to manipulate Sasha, on top of all their other issues?

That Marcy sentence was FOUL, btw 💀

Yessssssssss prisoner Luz is the primary aspect of this AU! Let's go!!!!

As you said, beyond Luz being a naturally affable person, Sasha and Anne are desperate to have someone normal to talk to, since the only people in their lives right now are their hivemind boss (who they hate) and their bitch wife (who they hate, but also love). Enter Luz, and the Calamity girls are like, "holy shit??? A regular conversation? I forgot what this felt like!" And then they start getting attached to this kid a little.

The ambiguity and unease surrounding Anne and her powers is so freaking good. I love it so much.

It's unsettling and terrifying how she can make you doubt your own mind, because yeah, how do you know that what you're feeling and thinking are your own thoughts when you are helpless to even RECOGNIZE that you're being manipulated in the first place, let alone resist it?

I love your joke comic idea about Luz accusing the Core of having done something to Anne and Sasha (because why else would they be so terrible and toxic to each other?), only for Darcy to just snort and be like, "nah man, they were this way long before we got involved." (And I'm sure the Core feeds the flames of that toxicity, because keeping Anne and Sasha divided and at each other's throats is another layer of insurance to make sure they don't try and resist or rise up against Darcy.)

There could also be humor/jokes as Luz realizes these two god-like beings who have been terriyfing her world are:

her age or maybe even younger (3 years after Belos' death, she is 18, and Anne would be 17)

even worse, they're MARRIED??? Luz is out here living her best, yuriful life in her isekai world with her awesome girlfriend, meanwhile these two are the definition of "please get a divorce"

@finbowl

As funny as it would be for the multiverse's most divorced not-divorced couple to be younger than perpetual honeymoonphase lumity, they are a fair bit older.

In hindsight I think I should've written that the date in Luz's journal is 4 or 5 new era, but oh well path not taken. Suffice to say, the Calamity Girls are 29 (Marcy might be 30 at this point not that she gets to enjoy it), and Luz is 18 to 20. It's been about 12 or 13 years since the girls went to Amphibia, and they've been doing this multiverse conquest thing for a decade or so.

The Core being what it is and making them do what they do definitely isn't helping things, but let's be honest it doesn't have to do much to make Sasha and Anne's relationship more toxic, they are very good at doing that themselves.

[elvhendis]

I would like to do armour/metal studies, so if anyone know a character that wears heavy armour or has a really cool reference let me know!!

[likesdoodling]

Been the victim of morbid inspiration yet again ~ this is a representation of Annatar's mental state/his ties to all the past preconceptions that are... Very messed up. from The Harrowing by Chthonion :D

(I was originally gonna do this with a vague image of Melkor in the background and have it be pre-redemption Sauron, but then decided I didn't want to go quite that dark- so this is the toned down version :D)

@chthonion

>:)

[fuumiku]

Harpy mickrin AU yay! Sorta loosely set in Aatom87's harpy & zookeeper AU- Rin is a sooty owl and Mickbell is a cockatiel. You know how parrots are...

The zoo keeps them in the same enclosure out of lack of funds to try and fix behavioral issues. Rin was being too self-isolating and Mickbell was starting shit with other harpies and bonded with zookeeper Kuro instead, which is unhealthy, so they put them in a side enclosure to bond together and assigned Kabru to it instead. Thus they are forced to have enrichment together.

Kabru has it tough since they both act like they hate him, except one is only a tsundere act lol. Mickbell like "huh?? You stealing my cagemate punk?? Wanna fight??" and he's not even wrong lol. Tiny bird very angry very aggressive, cue Kabru getting scratched every day... Kabru leaving their enclosure after a whole showdown of cockatiel Mick screaming scratching biting inflicting him little wounds and then Mick goes right back to "I'm just a little guy"ing @ Rin. Keep going buddy i'm sure... one day...... you'll win her over and make her laugh. Or something.

Although hmmm Kabru hating monsters would mean he wouldn't work there in the first place. Maybe.... He's there undercover to investigate the zoos for corruption or animal-monster abuse or smth... And the injured Mithrun harpy is evidence that he has to take under his wing ba dum tss <- this is how my AUs get out of control

I love Mickbell's stiff paintbrush of a ponytail so much

[adore-gregor]

not sure this post reaches the right target audience

[defiledtomb]

decided to go back to uni