#i just don't have the guts and clearly he is so afraid all the fucking time but he's willing to try for aziraphale and that means so much

[p4nishers]

i can't get over crowley, the demon, being the soft one out of the two of them. that crowley is always indulgent with aziraphale, always helpful, always protective. he's a demon and he's so fucking soft for aziraphale. he just wants a quiet life for them, all he really wants is to be with aziraphale. after thousands, after millions of years, he just wants aziraphale, safe and happy and his. that's all he fucking wants, to run away if they must, to leave the earth he loves so fucking much, only to keep aziraphale safe. he couldn't ever afford to appear weak in hell but he has a weakness and it's an angel, of all things. and hell tries to use it against him, that's why he's so defensive, that's why he closes so tightly around aziraphale, because he knows hell will find any opportunity to use his achilles heel against him, just like furfur and shax. i cannot fucking get over him being the kind one, the one who likes kids and humanity, bc while aziraphale loves every single human, he only likes 3 or 4 out of them. i can't over him being vulnerable with aziraphale, taking off his glasses any time they're alone, like it's merely an object that separates them. he's vulnerable and soft and gentle and forgiving and indulgent and caring with and for aziraphale and as demon, he shouldn't be, he tried not to be for thousands and thousands of years but he just can't fucking help himself and i love him so fucking much.

[theanimeoftheblackbunnymask]

Gathers up the courage to send an ask

Since you are the creator for the blueprint of Yandere PM! Dazai, I gotta ask (because this is my all-time favorite concept with Yandere Dazai and I need to get out of my writing funk)...

How would he react to his darling falling in love or forming a close relationship with someone else? BUT that someone else isn’t a nobody Ex. Chuuya, Akutagawa, Oda, or Kouyou. 

Like every second you are away from him, you are with the other person. Maybe going out of your way to avoid him and go to this other person. Dazai can clearly see that you aren’t being just friendly and it looks like the other person reciprocates your feelings.

However Dazai realizes that it wouldn’t be so simple as to just force you back with him or punish you since you’ve got yourself a new white knight.

Ex:

Chuuya, being someone not afraid to deck Dazai in the face, would be rightfully disgusted regarding Dazai’s behavior and would probably try to get you permanently away from the bandaged freak. And kiss you just to stick it to Dazai.

Akutagawa… ok y’all would be screwed if Dazai found out about you both but the relationship would be super sweet. LET AKUTAGAWA BE HAPPY!!

Oda needs no further explanation. Dazai actually likes and respects Oda so if he is telling Dazai to stop then maybe the suicidal dickhead would consider that he is going too far.

Kouyou is a debatable choice considering that she is a bit scared of Dazai and she is a tad like a yandere herself, but if you are important enough to her she might get you a job under her command so she can protect you during Port Mafia work hours. (she operates the Port Mafia brothels so do with that what you will)

Jesus this was a lot...

One of biggest differences between PM!Dazai and ADA!Dazai is the treatment of their darling.

PM!Dazai is way more clingy than ADA!Dazai. Dazai has you bounded to him 24/7, you're rarely alone. If you were to get close and fall in love with someone that wasn't Dazai, it'd have to be someone who's around him often.

It doesn't necessarily need to be someone like Chuuya, who's always working with Dazai, but instead it just needs to be someone who's in his presence often.

It started off with glances from across the room, but now it's become flirting with just your eyes alone. Dazai picked up on what was going on pretty fast, and this is where he thinks you've forgotten just how ruthless he is.

He'd bring you down to a room where your lover is tied to a chair, their mouth gagged as a cloth was placed over their eyes.

One of Dazai's favorite forms of torture is having someone hurt their loved ones. Luckily for him, and unfortunately for you, he just got his suit cleaned, so you'll have to be doing it.

All he'd do is hand you a crowbar and say one word, "Hit."

After a swift hit to the gut, you end up bursting into tears, saying that you couldn't hurt them.

This is when Dazai's true nature comes out.

Any amusement Dazai had is now placed with annoyance and disappointment, Dazai pulls at your hair, lifting you off the floor.

"If you don't fucking bash his brains in, it won't just him going out in a body bag."

Throwing you back down onto the floor, you reluctantly give the few more blows, the final blow causing you to collapse onto the floor before bursting out into tears.

"Good job," Dazai said in a sickeningly soft tone, patting your head before forcing you look up him. The coldness in his eyes sent a chill down your spine. "If you ever cheat on me again, I'll make you someone else's bitch."

[heeliumhaze-elle]

close friends

「synopsis」 — after running into her extremely toxic ex at jake's birthday party last year, y/n seemed to disappear off the face of the planet. the only traces of her were her instagram story posts during her month-long trip to the states at the start of the new year. but other than that, no one had seen or heard from her since that night in november. the boys have speculated that it was because of the run-in with k all those months ago; however, when something y/n posts on her 'close friends' story begins to circulate through their group, they grow increasingly suspicious and angry over their speculations. ... except something about all of this doesn't sit right with heeseung. 「warnings」 — mc suffers from depression & struggles with thoughts of suicide, the boys are kinda petty assholes imo, cursing. please dm me if i missed anything! 「word count」 — 4923 words 「author's note」 — lowercase intended. only slightly proofread. no real plot, rushed ending - like seriously i didn't know how to end it so i just did... this is my first story, so i'm really nervous, lol. this is all fictional. the way the idols are portrayed in this story does not reflect how i view them by any means. 「dedication」 — this story is dedicated to my friend ani - may you always remember that you are never alone, not anymore.

"can you fucking believe her?" asked sunghoon, staring at the screenshot on jungwon's phone.

jake and jay agreed, peering over sunghoon's shoulder to get a better look at the photo. sunoo, who sat opposite the 02z, let out a tired sigh while ni-ki, who sat on the tabletop between jake and sunoo, massaged his temples. meanwhile, jungwon looked at his hyungs uneasily. heeseung wondered if he regretted asking if y/n was okay.

heeseung kept his gaze fixed on his friends as they continued to skim through the now-infamous screenshot.

"literally though, like what the fuck are we then?" ni-ki asked. "how dare she."

"god, no! and then to re-add us to her 'close friends' as if nothing happened," jay added. "like jungwon wouldn't have said anything to us."

"right?" sunoo said, rolling his eyes as he read through the post. "as if he wasn't going to tell us! like hello? he's our best friend!"

"it's like it was about us," jake said. "i'm not here to play these games. if she has a fucking problem with us, she needs to just fucking say so. we're not in high school anymore!"

"... well, except ni-ki," muttered sunoo.

jungwon let out a nervous sigh. "guys, i didn't mean to start anything-."

"no!" jay interrupted. "jake's right. we're all old enough. she needs to use her fucking words. she has a problem with us, just fucking say so. don't fucking act like we're all 'good' when it's clearly about us."

"because what the hell did we ever do to her?" sunghoon demanded.

all the while, jungwon's phone was making its rounds to each of the boys. and soon, the phone was in heeseung's hands. he was finally able to read the screenshot that started this entire uproar.

... and he was gutted.

"my sleep schedule is so fucked as of lately. all i do is lay in bed for 85-90% of my day. i can't keep pretending i'm jet-lagged from my trip to the states. i desperately crave to get out of the house to do things with other people, but i literally have no friends here — outside the ones that i made at work. even when i try to do things on my own, it's just so mentally taxing that i end up sleeping for 24+ hours after attempting to make myself feel better. it's a lot, i guess.

"... if i wasn't so afraid of death and dying, then maybe-."

heeseung felt his heart drop. he forced himself to stop reading; he couldn't continue, knowing that's where y/n's mind went.

how long had y/n been feeling this way? was there truth in what the other boys were saying? was this post about them?

shaking his head, heeseung refocused his attention on his friends. they all sat around him, angered by the post that y/n had made just the day before. the only person - save for himself - who wasn't mad about what y/n posted was jungwon. but heeseung couldn't tell if that was because he was still able to view her close friends story on instagram or if jungwon was genuinely worried about y/n.

even if the post was about them, heeseung told himself that that was the least of their concerns. the only thing that mattered to him (and he was surprised that his friends didn't seem to think similarly on the subject) was how y/n felt.

as the others went on to bash y/n for posting that and not being upfront with them about her feelings, heeseung handed jungwon back his phone.

"like honestly, i thought we were friends. what is her problem?" sunghoon circled back.

heeseung stood from his seat at the park table, white-knuckled fists suddenly clenched at his side. he startled the others with how abruptly he got up, but he didn't seem to care. "are you all fucking hearing yourself right now?"

"did you not just see what she posted yesterday?" jay asked.

ni-ki looked up at his hyung and added, "and she's so messy for re-adding us to her close friends list. if it wasn't for jungwon hyung, we wouldn't have ever seen this. so i bet she thinks she got away with talking shit about us like that."

"that's exactly what she was thinking!" jake chimed in.

heeseung didn't stay to hear what his insensitive friends had to say next. he simply told the five of them to "fuck off" and bid jungwon goodbye before storming off from the scene. as he neared his car, he reached for his phone from his back pocket; he wanted to text y/n. he needed to! however, upon closer inspection, he realized that his phone was out of battery. and of course, today was the day his car's charging cable broke!

groaning to himself, heeseung let himself into his vehicle and just drove. with his phone dead, there was no way for him to reach y/n to give her the heads-up that he'd be arriving anytime soon... but he also figured - given what he had read only minutes and minutes ago - that she would be home regardless.

his thoughts drifted back to y/n. he kept wondering how long she had been feeling that way. he wondered if she felt lonely because while she was locked away in her apartment, the rest of them were still going to each other's houses and planning group excursions... excursions, heeseung came to realize, that y/n wasn't invited to.

fuck! he thought as he came to a red light. if that post truly was about him and the rest of the guys, was it not deserved? he thought back to all the times that they went out without inviting y/n and he wondered if her fomo eventually got so bad she thought that they had silently kicked her out of the friend group. no... there's no way she thought that! right? y/n had a lot more sense than to think that a few outings without her meant that they no longer wanted to be her friend. right?!

the light stayed red as heeseung's mind swirled with several different thoughts. there was more to the post. heeseung knew that. granted, he didn't read it as thoroughly as his friends had, but he had skimmed through it quickly enough. the others were so hung up on the fact that y/n said she didn't have any friends; heeseung also guessed they were angry over the little bits of text that followed her dark thoughts. but... was she wrong to say all those things? the other seemed to think so. so much so that they completely ignored the blatant cry for help that was the entirety of y/n's post.

when the light finally turned green, heeseung couldn't stop thinking about the first line of the last paragraph. "...if i wasn't so afraid of death and dying, then maybe all of this would be so much easier."

in the three years that heeseung had gotten to know y/n, he had to admit that he was very aware of how dangerously dark her thoughts could be. there were moments when he wouldn't hear from her for weeks at a time. he remembered how y/n would lament on the droves of friends she had lost in the years prior because they hated when she would fall into her slump. after all, she wouldn't text anyone for days at a time; he recalled how when she recalled those memories, it somehow always ended with the friends telling her that she was selfish or that she wasn't trying hard enough to get better.

heeseung quickly parked his car in the guest space of y/n's apartment complex. from his spot, he could see the curtains of her bedroom window weren't drawn, but the window was cracked opened ever-so-slightly. he found himself devising a plan b in case y/n didn't come to the door and it involved somehow shimmying up to the second floor and busting through her window.

without another moment to lose, he rapidly bashed his pointer finger against the doorbell. at least if she was sleeping, he was certain that this'd wake her up!

not even a minute had gone by when y/n flung her apartment door open. heeseung took in the sight of her. her hair, a tangled, matted mess. if he had to guess, he assumed her knots were much worse at the back of her head. he noted that the fullness of her cheeks had vanished. she looked so gaunt compared to the last time he saw her; he wondered when the last time she ate was... or at least when the last time she ate anything of sustenance was.

y/n looked at heeseung with tired eyes. she frowned for a moment, only to replace it with a sad smile.

"have you come to air your grievances with me in person?" she said in a strained whisper.

if heeseung had been gutted before, he had no idea what this new feeling was. whatever it was though, it shattered whatever was left of him. he had known y/n to have horrible episodes of hopelessness and defeat, but this was too much for him to bear. he couldn't even begin to imagine how she was feeling. she was a shell of herself.

"... what are you talking about?" he asked gently.

"i just thought..." y/n let out a deep, long sigh. she looked down at her hello kitty house slippers, not finishing her thought aloud. she tightly wrapped her arms around herself as she stroked her right upper arm slowly.

instinctively, heeseung removed his coat and draped it over y/n. her bloodshot, tired eyes looked up at him once more. he wanted to hold her. to make her feel his warmth. to make her feel his love. he just wanted her to see she wasn't alone anymore.

"you just thought what?" he asked as y/n ushered him inside.

she shut the door behind her and wordlessly led him to the small couch in her living room. heeseung saw the nest she had created for herself with her blankets, pillows, and plushies in the dark space. the only source of light came from her muted television, which was currently airing reruns of old cartoons from the 1990s and the early 2000s. there were torn-up bags of chips (some empty and some half-full), unfinished, open bottles of soju and cans of beer, and a plethora of takeout boxes scattered around her little nest across her tiny coffee table. trash and dirty laundry lined the floor around her couch.

"sorry about the mess. i haven't had visitors in over six months now..."

six months. the last time anyone had seen y/n had been over seven months ago. sure, they had seen her posting all about her trip back to the states a month ago, but no one had physically been in her presence in over half a year. heeseung wanted to kick himself. why hadn't he visited sooner?

"no... please don't apologize-."

"i'm embarrassed," she whispered, trying to make space on the couch by tossing all of her used bedding to the floor.

heeseung stopped her in time, insisting that it was fine. after all, he had been the one to show up unannounced.

"what were you talking about before, y/n?" heeseung tried holding her gaze, but she quickly averted her eyes to her slippers once more. "what grievances are you talking about?"

every sigh that escaped y/n's lips was a dagger to heeseung's heart. he watched as she struggled to find the words to say. sensing her panic, heeseung guided her into her cocoon of blankets - making some room for himself as well. the two of them sat side-by-side in silence. he could wait all day for her to reply, especially if it meant not leaving her alone in this state.

"your friends," y/n reached for her phone from the recesses of her blankets, "they all texted me these paragraphs about something that i posted privately yesterday."

WHAT?!

heeseung could feel his blood boiling. "how do you mean?"

PARAGRAPHS?!

y/n unlocked her phone and handed the device to the man beside her. just as soon as he got a hold of her phone, she quickly retracted her hand and brought it to her eyes, rubbing away at them.

heeseung first watched as y/n began to curl up into a ball, then he directed his attention to her phone. upon first glance at her message app, he noticed that there were three circles pinned to the top: two group chats - one called "ohana 👑" and the other "the tortured poets department 🖊️" - and a silly selfie of him and y/n with the nickname "evan lee 💜" plastered just below it. a blush danced upon his cheeks at the sight of it all.

however, the warmth in his cheeks lasted for only a millisecond as his eyes fell just below their text thread; it appeared that ni-ki, jay, sunghoon, jake, and sunoo all sent messages to y/n in the time that it took for heeseung to arrive. heeseung tapped at the most recent of the texts, sunoo's. he repeated the process with jake's, sunghoon's, jay's, and finally, ni-ki's texts. with each scroll through of texts from his friends, he found himself getting angrier and angrier at them. especially after reading y/n's responses to each of them.

it was hard to tell tone over text, but heeseung knew his friends well. each message to y/n was crafted uniquely and in the sender's own words, but the gist of what they were saying was all the same.

they each started their message by telling y/n that they had been with jungwon the day before and how he had asked them if she was okay. they all state that they didn't know what he could possibly be talking about until jungwon mentioned that it was in reference to her instagram story - a story he failed to mention was only for close friends.

jay and sunoo went on to say that they didn't mind that they couldn't see her story; y/n was allowed to pick and choose who she wanted to see those stories. jake, ni-ki, and sunghoon - on the other hand - took major offense into not being able to see her story, considering "everything" they had been through "together with k". they all mentioned how deeply hurt they were by the fact that y/n said she had not friends. ni-ki had gone as far as to say, "i thought that me and the hyungs were your friends. but i guess not, huh?"

they then followed up their emotions with the same statements they were exclaiming at the park, about how if y/n had something to say about them to just outright say it and not dabble in this "high school bullshit and make everyone play this stupid game where they have to figure out what the hell it is they did wrong" (as jake put it in his text). in sunoo's message, he claimed that he was only reaching out to y/n because he wanted to be upfront with her and couldn't think of a single thing he might have done to offend her. jay and sunghoon continued to stress the fact that their text wasn't meant to be read as an attack, but they "wanted to be adults about the situation instead of resorting to petty, childish drama" because they too couldn't think of anything to warrant such a post from y/n. ni-ki drew from the fact that he and the rest of the boys were hurting over this and how it was "shady and cringy" to post a story like that on her social media account; he accused her of just wanting attention because he "didn't do anything wrong" so for her to post that with the implication that he had irritate the maknae to no end.

just like that, each of them wrapped up their lengthy chunks of text to y/n with such vitriol that heeseung couldn't believe that these were his friends. he knew they were coming from a place of hurt, but he was surprised that they didn't see y/n's post for what it truly was: a cry for help.

instead, they turned her raw emotions into their hurt egos. they decided to take bits and pieces of y/n's story and mold it into this narrative where she attempted to assassinate their characters. it went from being a post about how utterly depressed and pathetic she felt to being a post about them.

and heeseung was livid.

with all of them.

when had they become so self-important? if they were truly y/n's friends like they had so furiously claimed to be, why hadn't any of them asked if she was okay? even jungwon failed to ask her, opting instead to ask his hyungs and ni-ki - which, arguably got everyone in this mess in the first place.

heeseung felt his mind drift back to y/n's reply to each of the boys' texts. while he didn't read every single one, he did read the only one that got a text back, y/n's text to ni-ki. it was a long, heartfelt apology from y/n; heeseung could see how this whole mess was tearing her up inside just from her words to ni-ki alone. but he got even madder when he got to her parting words, only to see that ni-ki had replied with, "k. thanks for reaching out. i just need time for myself if i'm being honest. bye."

before he could say anything, heeseung was brought back to reality when he caught y/n silently sobbing into her hands from the corner of his eye.

"i'm sorry!" she whispered. over and over again. each time more broken than the last.

heeseung gently pulled her closer to his chestm cradling her to him as he rubbed his thumb against her back in an effort to comfort her. "you have nothing to be sorry for..."

"i hurt everyone's feelings-!"

"fuck them," heeseung growled, holding her tighter. "i'm sorry. i'm sorry that they let their egos get in the way of being decent human beings. i'm sorry that you've felt so alone for the last few months. i'm sorry that i haven't shown up for you in the way that you needed someone to be there."

y/n cried harder. "i... i... i... i didn't... i didn't mean..." her hiccups were affecting the rhythm of her speech. "i didn't mean that... that we weren't friends! i just... i just felt-."

"shhhh," he soothed as she shuddered under his embrace. "we haven't been very good friends to you as of lately, anyway. they're like my brothers and i love them, but those messages alone... we haven't been decent friends to you. i can understand how easy it is to feel like you're this lonely, little island, especially when the rest of us are still going out and making no effort to see how you're doing.

"i saw their messages to you. in ni-ki's case specifically, i scrolled up a little too far and saw that you've spent the last half of these past few months messaging him little things like tiktoks and memes only for him to like them or reply to you with one word. have you been reaching out to the rest of the boys?"

he felt her nod against his chest.

oh... so he was the only one to not have heard from her. the green-eyed monster crept into his thoughts momentarily, only for him to realize that the others' text threads were probably just as dry as ni-ki's.

"i'm really sorry that i didn't reach out to you sooner," heeseung sighed. "i really don't know what i was thinking. i'm sorry that you've felt so alone."

once y/n had calmed down enough to stop her hiccups, she excused herself to grab a glass of water. she asked heeseung if he wanted anything while she was up, but he declined - instead offering to get the glass for her. she appreciated the gesture but went to get the water herself.

this moment alone left heeseung in his thoughts again. he didn't want her to have to recount anything to him if she didn't want to, but he still needed to know. in her text to ni-ki, she said that she hadn't meant to keep jungwon on her list of close friends. that what she posted hadn't meant to be for the people she had met in south korea; it was for her friends back home - as a way to vent out the frustrations she hadn't known how to put into words for her korean audience. these frustrations, from what heeseung could gather, were things she wasn't ready to tell him or the others.

but the others had practically forced it out of her in her apologies to them...

... and ni-ki had the gall to tell her that he needed time and space from her. the rest left her on read - as if only turning their read receipts on for this moment alone.

heeseung could feel himself getting worked up all over again. gripping tightly at the fabric of his jeans, he sat up straighter when he heard y/n coming back to the darkened living room.

"i'm sorry," y/n whispered as she neared him.

heeseung stared up at her helplessly as she sat beside him. "no, there's nothing to be-."

"i meant to take all of you off my 'close friends' list. it wasn't because i didn't think we were friends; there are just some things from my past that i'm not ready to talk about with you guys yet-."

"and you don't have to! i'm sorry that the rest of them think that you owe us that..."

"i mean... they thought it was about them; they just wanted to clear things up and let how they were feeling be known," y/n said with a sigh, pulling heeseung's coat closer to her chest. "i offended them. i respect them from being upfront about their feelings-."

"IT'S FUCKING BULLSHIT!" heeseung stood up to face y/n. "WHY ARE THEY ALLOWED TO EXPRESS THEIR EMOTIONS LIKE THAT AND YOU'RE NOT?"

regret washed over heeseung as he noticed y/n's sullen eyes widen. she bit her quivering lips and heeseung wanted to punch himself in the face.

"sorry," he muttered. "i didn't mean to blow up like that. i just..."

heeseung knelt before y/n.

"no, it's okay," she said, avoiding his gaze.

"it's not... and what the guys did isn't okay either. yeah, they confronted you because they thought it was about them and they want to clear the air, but there's a way to go about that. and for ni-ki to go off on your like that only to leave you with that 'i need space' bullshit of a text-."

"he's just a kid."

"i get that, but i have no idea where the boys get off with being so... i don't know... vain? for lack of a better word. their reactions just feel so... guilty. as if they had done something-."

"i was being extremely vague in my post."

heeseung took y/n's shaking hands, finally holding her gaze as she looked at him. she seemed shocked by the physical interaction; he wondered how long it had been since she had touched another person outside their hug minutes ago.

"exactly! if it wasn't about them, but they somehow found a way to relate to it? i don't know... again, i think they're acting out of guilt," heeseung caressed the back of her hands with his thumb.

y/n gave heeseung a sad smile. "i get their side. with the way i worded everything, i can see how they relate what i wrote with the way everyone handled everything between k and me a few years ago."

heeseung felt y/n rip her hands away from his as she buried her face into her hands. sitting back on the couch, he pulled her into another hug; she didn't seem to be crying again, but he couldn't be too sure anymore. y/n hadn't mentioned her past relationship with k since their nasty breakup, but he remembered how unbothered she had been upon seeing him seven months ago at jake's birthday party. he also remembered how angered y/n had been - despite being unbothered at k's initial presence - because he attempted to approach her while she was alone at the open bar, grabbing refills for heeseung, sunghoon, and herself.

"... did the post have anything to do with k?" heeseung asked. he felt her go stiff at the mention of her ex-boyfriend before shaking her head against his chest and letting out a small sniffle. "okay, then? so the boys had nothing to worry about. it's just this huge misunderstanding. if they want to hold it against you, fuck 'em."

"i still really hurt their feelings."

"you apologized. did they?"

y/n pushed heeseung away to hug her legs to her chest. she shook her head. "but... a selfish part of me really feels like i'm owed one."

"it's not selfish - especially after you cleared it up with them. they jumped conclusions and said extremely hurtful things to you. if they truly did no wrong - which who knows, maybe they didn't do anything wrong! - i don't know... maybe they shouldn't have been so defensive. i don't know! maybe it's just me... but their behavior is downright embarrassing!"

with another sigh, y/n leaned against heeseung, who instantly wrapped his arm around her; it felt just like before, like no time had passed between the two of them. like there wasn't this mix of guilt, hopelessness, and despair in the air between them.

"embarrassing?"

"how else would your describe it when you make someone else's trauma and hurting about you?" heeseung asked, giving y/n's shoulder a tight squeeze. "y/n, i know you. i know you're not going to hold this another the boys, but i think their reaction to all of this is downright stupid. you talked about some pretty serious stuff in your post, but they pushed past that to complain that you might have posted about them. that doesn't sit right with me-."

"it's not that deep, hee-."

"except it is, y/n! this is exactly what happened with k hyung after you two broke up and more recently after jake's party. specifically after jake's party, you posted something privately about how hard things have been on your end and how it was affecting your mental health; someone shared it with him and he confronted you-."

"k apologized-."

"but then he immediately turned the conversation into 'i'm sorry, but also you hurt me!' and then you two only focused on his feelings!" heeseung thought back to that time. "i just... i feel like the boys took whatever was posted in the wrong direction. and even then, it wasn't even aimed in their direction to begin with! there are worse things to be done and that have been done than taking someone off your story then putting them back on..."

y/n pressed herself closer to heeseung as he continued.

"and honestly... whatever was actually said in your story was so much bigger than their feelings being hurt, y/n. because we both know that wasn't what it was about."

"hee..."

"look, i know... i know that you never meant for any of us to see it, but we did. and instead of seeing it for what it was, most of them made it about themselves. and i'm sorry for that. i'm sorry that we haven't been good friends to you lately - to the point where you felt like we weren't your friends to begin with. they're allowed to be hurt over it if they truly think that it's about them, but they can't just ambush you like that and then close the discussion when you clear the air and open it up for them. honestly, with the way all of this was handled, i wouldn't be surprised if you still stood by that statement! it's almost like... at every turn, you're reprimanded in some way for posting about your feelings. someone always has to take it out of context and make it about themselves.

"you literally told every single one of them that it had nothing to do with them and they have the audacity to sit there and say that they need time away from you? again, that doesn't sit right with me! why are you made to be the problem in every situation you're stuck to struggle with!"

there was still so much more heeseung had wanted to say, but the sounds of y/n's violent sobs had stopped him. she began to wail into his chest again and she squeezed him closer to her. heeseung felt his heart breaking as he looked down at one of his best friends. she wept loudly, screaming incoherent phrases into him while heeseung held her tightly.

"i'm sorry," heeseung whispered into her hair, pulling her onto his lap. "i'm sorry that i wasn't there for you before... i'm sorry that it's taken me so long to see how much you've been hurting. i'm sorry for everything. but i'm here now."

[crossguild]

there are a lot of bad takes floating around in op fandom but whitebeard slander is always the worst because oda took such care to craft a narrative in which this ONE character fits every mold of a platonic ideal of a father figure and i'm STILL seeing (thankfully not many) people misinterpret and take him in the worst possible faith and hold him to insane standards to which no other OP character is ever held

"he's sexist because he doesn't allow the women on his crew to fight"

word of god, not canon, also explicitly retconned with the presence of whitey bay on his crew in the oden flashback. there are also women who captain subordinate fleets who were clearly fighting alongside him at marineford. shanks's crew has no women at ALL yet no one ever comes at him about it??

even if it wasn't retconned, he served on the same crew as buckingham stussy, charlotte linlin and gloriosa. man knows women will fucking murder u.

he's very much portrayed as an old-fashioned 'dad' figure and OP's world is one in which sexism still exists. it's misguided but not unexpected for him to insist that his 'daughters' aren't put in even more danger because of his orders because he wants to protect them, but honestly given what we've seen of him if they wanted to fight he could NOT stop them lmao

"why would he raid marineford for ace but not avenge thatch or oden?"

ace is still alive. he didn't raid marineford for vengeance but to preserve a life that can still be saved

thatch and oden are dead and attempting to avenge their deaths would have racked up countless more casualties not just from facing off against kaidou or blackbeard's crew, but because in that big fight, he would be vulnerable to attack from other emperors and also the world government.

kaidou specifically used the raid on marineford to try and attack his flank, and was only stopped because shanks stepped in. wb only took the risk of raiding marineford because he felt that the life of one of his crewmembers was worth it, and he's explicitly pointed out that he would do the same for any other crewmember.

the fact that the navy only ever had the guts to try and execute ace because of his lineage speaks to how serious wb is about that particular threat.

"why didn't he listen to shanks??"

shanks wasn't telling him anything he didn't know. he already tried to stop ace, i don't doubt they've tried to call him back, but ace is also a pirate and whitebeard told shanks to butt out in order to preserve ace's reputation and autonomy. he respected ace's wishes to do what he felt was necessary and then he took responsibility for it on ace's behalf.

ace failed! he fucked up! ace felt ashamed enough, and whitebeard knew that, so he took the blame on himself as his father so that at least in the eyes of the world, it was his own reputation that took a beating and not his son's. i know a lot of people don't recognize that, but it is very much a selfless act of love and care. allowing his kid to make a mistake and then taking responsibility for it and helping him recover from it is the role of a good father

"he's too arrogant and trading on reputation and not actually that strong!"

he maintained order in the new world for 20 years after roger's death. he was a terminally ill dying man whose mere presence stabilized hundreds of islands because people were so afraid of him. he isn't overconfident or arrogant at all, he's more than earned any confidence he displays

he is BOTH trading on reputation AND monstrously powerful, but even he says that he's no longer at his peak and people don't live forever. it's well established that he knew he would probably die at marineford, and given the shrewd choices he made all throughout that battle, it's more than reasonable to assume that he prepared the crew for that possibility

"ace would have been a good captain/ace should have been the captain"

ace got them into that mess. he sure as damn hell would not have been a better captain, nor did he WANT to be a captain. ace never wanted to be captain or find the one piece or whatever, he wanted a family and he found it with whitebeard. ace was doing exactly what he wanted as whitebeard's 2nd division commander and all whitebeard wanted for him was to do what he wanted to, not force him to become PK

ace turned back because he couldn't shrug off an insult to whitebeard, and i'm mad at him for it, but it's also completely understandable why he did that. he's a sympathetic, nuanced, great character exactly because of that.

it takes a LONG time to train up haki, ace obviously wouldn't have had the opportunity to properly learn it when luffy could only manage it because one of the most refined users of haki who had all the time in the world to spend training him took luffy under his wing for two years. how the hell was ace gonna learn haki under whitebeard when whitebeard has 1600+ members to take care of and numerous territories to defend. he was growing at a very reasonable rate, it's not ace's fault nor whitebeard's that luffy's pace is so wildly accelerated

"marco didn't do a good job leading the crew"

they were together for a YEAR after marineford and still mustered the forces to fight a war. the story that circulated is that they attacked teach out of vengeance for whitebeard, but marco explicitly says that they moved on blackbeard because he was invading sphinx/other territories

marco is a careful, thoughtful guy. sphinx looked just fine. we heard the WBPs got scattered, but we didn't hear about any mass casualties and he also did not seem all that torn up about what happened during the payback war. actually, the fact that plenty of them and their allies were still alive and kicking for weevil to attack in the timeskip speaks to them being pretty okay after the payback war, if scattered. there's a lot that's still unrevealed about that conflict and i'm not casting judgment until we find out what

"whitebeard doesn't act like an all-powerful captain and he couldn't control the crew"

he's their dad. a dad doesn't exist to impose his will on his kids and force them to follow the path that he wants them to, his parenting is clearly in the style of 'give them a place to grow and thrive and don't worry about that other stuff, with some ground rules like don't be trafficking drugs or slaves or killing your crewmates'

the operation fell apart because blackbeard betrayed every ideal of whitebeard's and took advantage of his trust and kindness. so it's the betrayal of the ideal of 'family' that hurt them, not a problem in how the crew itself was run. it did, after all, function well-- better than any other operation in the new world-- for several decades.

[cosmic-ships]

{ Uncertain }

Ship: Adam Sackler x Kaden

Words: 1,293

cw: ANGST! ;;

Summary: How many time does this need to rinse and repeat?

Hey, if you aren't a self-shipper please dni, nothing against ya, I got anxiety lol

A heavy weight on the chest, a sinking feeling, going lower and lower it reaches the bottom. Gut punched. The heart jumps into the throat and it feels like you're drowning without water, wanting to scream but not a sound is heard. The eyes sting and when their eyes blink they glass over but there are no tears that fall.

Your heart feels like it wants to stop, you forget how to breathe and the deep inhale causes the breath to stutter.

"We're just old friends that's all."

Brought back to reality.

"old friends that used to be together romantically.."

"Why are you so upset? I hugged her that's all."

"It wasn't the hug….it was the look you gave her when you pulled away…" Kaden's voice was quiet they were afraid to be any louder for the fear of tears falling.

"Fucking hell, you're still all paranoid and shit? Really?"

"You can't blame me-" Kaden huffed, standing to their feet "You've got a track record you know."

That stung, like drinking a poison that burned all the way down into the depths of his stomach. His jaw clenched, eyes piercing daggers through them.

"When are you going to trust me? What? You think because I supposedly gave her a 'look' it means I want to fuck her?"

"N-- I…." Kaden glanced to the floor, that was the thing… Kaden didn't know. Their green eyes gazed back up, locking with his. Kaden remained silent and shook their head. It wasn't an answer to his question, it was defeat.

"I…." Kaden felt pressure on their chest a heavy weight that couldn't be lifted with words or actions. an ever-growing pressure that would ultimately make them collapse if they didn't get out of there. "I think…."

Adam waited with bated breath, anger was clear on his face. How many times did they have these same fights? The same back and forth until one of us gave up? It was exhausting. Kaden felt like they were trapping him, that he would be better off if…

Kaden's tears pricked their eyes and spilt over their eyes, rolling down their face but their expression was almost stoic "Adam I think.."

"No." He quickly walked over and gently placed his hands on Kaden's upper arms and Kaden froze, their eyes closing as more tears fell. "Don't say what I think you're going to say. Just…fucking don't."

Kaden's throat went dry and Adam could feel the slight tremble in their body, his grip tightened a little.

"D-Don't--" Adam's voice cracked a little, it no longer held anger, his amber eyes secretly pleading with Kaden, don't say it.

"I need to go.." Kaden whispered.

"Kaden. Don't. Please…stay…Please.." Adam attempted to close the distance to hug them but Kaden stepped back, getting out of his grip with Adam reluctantly let go of them.

"We're not good…" Kaden choked out a small sob. "I mean Christ, every other week we're right back here. Except this time I'm thinking clearly-"

"I can't let you go." He felt a terrible pang in his heart, it felt like he was being crushed from the inside and he didn't know how to fix it. He just wanted this to be better.

"Why? So we can make up and then have this happen again? I've trapped you..it's clear to you this wasn't serious. You've shown time and time again that to you it's not real to you…It's not fair to me and it's not fair to you.."

"How do I fix it? Lemme fix it." Adam was panicking, he just didn't want them to leave.

"…..You can't." Kaden walked towards the door. "I'm sorry I couldn't be someone you wanted.." Kaden's voice carried in a whisper, their vocal cords strained as fresh tears rolled down their face.

With that, Kaden left, closing the door behind them and all they could hear was Adam losing his mind from behind the door, cursing and smashing. He wasn't good at handling his emotions that well but he never did it when Kaden was there.

Kaden walked the night streets, in a daze, phone turned off because of the millions of calls and text messages from Adam. their eyes heavy and exhausted from crying for what felt like forever. They no longer had any tears to shed, they felt numb, and empty like a part of them was left up there with him.

They knew this was for the best but their heart ached, they wished they could be stupid, to just forget it and run back to him but they weren't, they knew it was a cycle that they couldn't stop. Kaden trailed through the dimly lit park, finding a park bench. They sat on it, slumped forwards.

The weight of everything finally crashed down as they thought about all the fights and then their mind thinking of the what ifs. He was going to move on in a few days and in a few days have someone else. It was an assumption but it was an assumption that plagued their thoughts and poisoned their soul. Kaden leaned all the way forward, their arms raising and their hands covering their head as they let out a loud sob. it felt like their soul was being ripped out repeatedly, it felt like they were dying in the slowest possible way

They stayed like that for a while and before they knew what was happening arms were around them. Kaden jumped to see Adam was there, arms wrapped around them tightly.

"Don't run." He stated and Kaden lifted their head, it was hard to see him but his eyes looked puffy..did he cry?

"I know what you said. I respect it. We don't have to be…" Adam inhaled deeply "We don't have to be together but I don't want you out of my life. I don't know how to fix it and I might not be able to. I just want to keep you in my life in one way or another. Please.."

Kaden couldn't help it, no matter how hard they wanted to scream, to yell in his face and call him an emotionally unavailable prick they couldn't all they could do was cling to him and sob because the fact of the matter was, Kaden didn't want to be completely out of his life either. It might be hard at first, and it might hurt but they needed him.

After a few moments, Adam released his hold on Kaden once Kaden had stopped crying. "I won't walk out of your life-" Kaden spoke softly, their voice almost returning to normal but Adam's heart clenched because the once bubbly voice he grew to love sounded dull, almost as if their life had left them.

"But I need space right now…I don't know how long but…I'll…I'll call okay?"

Kaden and Adam stood up together and Adam sighed heavily, he hated the idea of them not being in contact all the time but for once he was listening and decided to give them the space that they needed.

"…Okay" Adam mumbled, shoving his hands into his pockets.

Kaden cleared their throat as they went to turn away from him "Don't get mugged on your way home" Kaden gave a small chuckle despite their laugh sounding a little awkward and sad.

"hah.." Adam feigned a laugh. "Right…"

"Goodbye, Adam."

Adam said nothing, he was afraid if he opened his mouth he would either break apart completely or say something incredibly stupid. His eyes were glassy so he simply nodded his head.

They parted their separate ways, uncertainty looming above them both as they both walked to opposite exits of the small dimly lit park. Not knowing if anything would ever feel normal or the same again…

I PROMSIE IT WILL GET BETTER T_T

Taglist: Lemme know if you wanna be added!

@ama-ships || @heatobrienswife || @kylars-princess || @dragonsmooch || @mahitosoulmate <- I didn't know you changed your name and panicked lmaoooo

[shootforthestars-28]

How we are with this season finale of Chicago pd...

What the future hold??

I have *so* many feelings post-finale! 😅

My thoughts are below the cut so, for those of you who haven't seen it yet, there are spoilers below.

Firstly, I'm truly gutted that we're losing Tracy from the cast but at least she got a better, more believable send-off than Jesse did. I still can't get my head around how they thought it was appropriate to have Jay simply up and leave Hailey after everything they had been through up until that point. It really just doesn't sit right with me!

Secondly, why the fuck was Chapman the one to sidle up to his gurney before he got loaded into the back of the ambulance?! I swear to God, if she becomes his love interest in Season 12, I'm rioting! 😅 While I do agree that perhaps the events of the finale might be the start of Hank opening up to someone, I really don't think it can be her. The dynamic of him being in a meaningful relationship with someone who, professionally, would go over his head at the drop of a hat, I don't think would work. He values trust and loyalty too much to let that happen.

Speaking of trust and loyalty...Alvin!! 🥹 How I loved seeing those to share the screen once more. Watching that scene, I found myself feeling really nostalgic for the older seasons when we got to see a more comedic Hank... mainly because it was Alvin with whom he shared those moments with. But this was an excellent little addition to the episode that was well written, well directed and superbly portrayed.

I thought the father/daughter arc was a sweet angle to take on Hailey's departure, albeit very similar to that of Erin's. I'm pleased to see that the door for both Jay and Hailey is very much open but it was evident to see that it wasn't Hank and Hailey on screen in the last few moments of the episode - that was very much Jason and Tracy.

Upton fans have been really vocal on socials this year on how afraid Tracy is of Jason and how intimidating he is on set when the evidence to the contrary is so overwhelming it's almost amusing! There is clearly a lot of love, respect and affection between all of the cast members which is seen in the plethora of behind the scenes photos and videos we get from the cast and crew. Having visited the set a few times myself, I can verify that first hand.

I have watched and re-watched the video posted on social media of Jason 'yelling' and 'swearing' at Director Jesse on set when, in actual fact, they were running through a scene and Jason asks Jesse "why are all the fucking cameras over here?". Jesse replies and Jason says "oh, okay" and runs the scene again. Anyone who knows even the smallest amount about Jason knows that he's a swearer. I'm not saying that's the right or wrong way to behave but after spending nigh-on a decade around him, from what I can see, neither Tracy nor Jesse seem to be phased at all.

Overall, I think it was a fitting way to end the season.

In terms of what's next, well the unit is now down to four so I suspect we're going to need to more hands on deck! Whether Petrovic will decide to stay or not, I'm not sure but one thing we definitely need is more Detectives! Hopefully the time has finally come for Officers Burgess, Ruzek and Atwater to finally pass their Detectives exams!

We're also due a Burzek wedding which I'm hoping to God Trudy Platt is heavily involved in!

And I'd love to see a happier Hank. With all the loss he's experienced, I'm hoping he can find something/ someone that makes fighting to live in the finale worthwhile... just as long as it's not Chapman 😂 He needs a Det. Katherine Meadows in his life 😉

I could go on forever but thank you for asking my opinion 💛

[xxhappy-chickenxx]

snippets dump round 2!! i don't even remember the context of this but i thought it'd be cute if Pete brought a stray kitten home and control-freak Vegas felt immediately out of his element (dw, he comes around in the end) ~~

“Vegas-”

“No, Pete,” Vegas huffs, pacing around the bedroom. He can hear the… thing in their tub, meowing pathetically. His lip curls in disgust, “those things just piss and shit everywhere!” 

“Cats are actually very hygienic,” Pete frowns, “look, I know it’s unexpected, but he found me, Vegas, what was I supposed to do? I couldn’t find his mother and he was hungry!” 

“Not your problem,” Vegas says flippantly, distantly aware that it’s a very callous thing to say. Whatever, he’s a mob boss, or… ex-mob boss. Either way, he’s literally killed people, he can put a kitten out on the street. “I didn't know you were in the business of saving pathetic creatures.” 

“And yet I saved you,” Pete crosses his arms, clearly not budging on this. Vegas bristles at that, but sighs, crossing his arms right back. 

“If you keep it,” he grits out, trying to ignore the look of sheer joy that crosses Pete’s face, “it’s your responsibility, I’m not doing anything.” 

“I’ve taken care of your family for seven years,” Pete rolls his eyes, “a kitten compared to all that is nothing.” 

The final nail in the paw-shaped coffin is Macau, home from the movies with a soda that announces his presence before anything else does. 

“What’re you guys doing in here?” He rattles the ice in his cup, sucking the straw loudly. Before Pete can answer, another loud meow sounds from the bathroom, and Macau’s ears perk up comically. “Is that a cat?” 

“A kitten, actually,” Pete corrects him, smiling as he follows Macau into the bathroom, while Vegas sits defeated at the foot of their bed. 

“Woah, no way! Where’d you find him?” 

“You know the alley behind the market? He was pawing around back there, eating fish guts. I offered him a piece off my skewer and he ran right up to me, not afraid of anything.”

“Awww,” Macau coos at him, and Vegas rolls his eyes. He doesn’t understand how something so pathetic could be considered cute. The thing can’t even defend itself. “How old is he?” 

“No idea,” Pete hums, “I brought him straight home, we’ll need to look up a veterinarian.” 

Macau gasps, “Can I come?” 

“Sure,” Pete laughs, “We’ll go first thing tomorrow, but today, it’s getting late. We should try to get to the shops before they close, he’ll need food and a litter box.” 

“Let’s go!” His drink abandoned, Macau cradles the bundle of black fur against his chest, beaming as he exits the bathroom. “Hia, look how cute he is! Are you coming with us?” 

“Hm,” Vegas frowns at the little creature wriggling impatiently in his brother’s arms, “I need to get started on dinner. 

“Aw, ok,” Macau leaves their room, chattering to the kitten all the way, “let’s go, little guy, we’re gonna get you all the good stuff, you’re gonna love it…” 

Pete comes out of the bathroom a moment later, watching Vegas closely. “You’re sure you’re ok with this? We can always find him a new home.” 

“It’s just a cat,” Vegas huffs, “what’s the worst it could do?” 

A day later, Vegas learns the ‘worst it can do’ is use his tailored pants as a ropes course. He storms into the closet when he hears the hangers rattling, his hands clenching into fists at the sight of dozens of tiny rips and holes in his painstakingly curated denim. “You little shit!” he yells, turning when Pete runs in behind him, “Look at what he did!” 

“Fuck,” Pete murmurs, scooping the tiny menace into his arms, “poor little guy, you’re just trying to explore, huh? We’ll have to get him something to climb and make sure to keep the doors closed.” 

“That’s it?” Vegas asks, “You’re not going to discipline him?”

“How am I supposed to discipline a cat, Vegas?” Pete replies, his voice flat, “He doesn’t even know what he did wrong.” 

“That doesn’t matter!” Vegas rages, while Pete just blinks at him. In his arms, the kitten wriggles impatiently before flattening its ears and hissing at Vegas. He steps back, affronted. “Did it just hiss at me?” 

“I think so,” Pete snorts, “first time I’ve heard him do it. Glad to know you’re making a good first impression. I’m going to feed him and overnight a new cat tree,” he walks out, calling over his shoulder, “make sure you close the door behind you!” 

[dream-meister-translations]

DREAM MEISTER AND THE RECOLLECTED BLACK FAIRY

MAIN STORY : CHAPTER 3 PART 16

━

Camus's hand trembled as it grasped the gun. His face paler than the moon itself. His stance so unsteady it seemed he could collapse at any moment.

EMMA : Camus...?

MAM : Camus has… more than his fair share of trauma when it comes to guns. Even just holding one makes him tremble like this.

EVERYONE (EXCEPT SEVEN) : Huh!?

MAM : It was that duel wasn’t it? That caused all of this.

CAMUS : Yes. I lost my left eye in the most disgraceful duel in the history of the Bloody Lady and, ultimately, it led to my expulsion from the organization.

CAMUS : Since then, I've been afraid of guns. It's the truth.

It was then that everyone turned to look at Seven…

SEVEN : ...................Heheheheh……

SEVEN : Hahahahaha!!

EMMA : Se-Seven...?

EMMA : (Could it be...)

━FLASHBACK━

EMMA : If he adores her, why did he leave?

VICTOR : I heard that he was kicked out as punishment for failing them. It’s a harsh world, I guess. I’ll tell you more about that when I get the chance. 

━END FLASHBACK━

EMMA : (So all this is because of a duel with Seven!?)

SEVEN : This won't do... I can't just sit back and watch this.

SEVEN : Let me take over the match.

LEN : Huh? What do you mean?

SEVEN : I finally remembered, Camus... That match with you. It was so incredibly intense.

SEVEN : You had my heart pounding, my guts churning...! Only for it to end in a misfire...

SEVEN : This time’ll be different. A duel bigger than anything we've ever seen, risking all our lives and dreams on a single bullet!

SEVEN : Camus, hand me the gun. I'll take your place. Let me experience the ultimate thrill and decide your dreams for you!

VICTOR : W-Wait a minute, Seven!

LEN : This guy's nuts! Hey, stop that, Seven, what the fuck’s gotten into you!? Drop the theatrics!

YMIR : That's fine by me...

VICTOR : Ymir!?

YMIR : What? Seven seems to be far more focused than Camus right now. And he's clearly had success in the past, no?

GRANDFLAIR : This is getting complicated, what do we do?

CROW : We'll leave it to Camus. It's not our decision to make.

EMMA : (Camus...)

SEVEN : I’m waiting, now hand over the gun! If you can't do it, then I will.

CAMUS : The bet has already been made. The players must remain the same.

SEVEN : ........!!

CAMUS : Whether I’m capable of pulling the trigger is thrilling in its own right, is it not?

CAMUS : And... I will definitely take your eye in a rematch one of these days. So, for now, behave yourself.

SEVEN : Tsk! Haha, alright. I’m looking forward to it.

Speaking his last thoughts, Seven stepped back and in an instant seemed to slip back into his lazy, characteristic, sway.

MAM : What a nuisance... After all that racket, it came down to you anyway.

CAMUS : Yes, I apologize. By the way, Mam, if I may. I have one last thing to ask, despite the shame.

MAM : ........Hm?

CAMUS : ...My secret has been exposed. There's no need to pretend anymore.

CAMUS : So I want to say something to her.

EMMA : (Huh?)

MAM : I see. So you’re also in a difficult position.

MAM : It's important to say goodbye between lifetimes. Being a widow... it’s lonely.

CAMUS : Then, Emma, please accept this. Here.

EMMA : M-Me...?

As instructed I slowly approached Camus where he swiftly and suddenly embraced me with his long arms.

ALL : What!?

VICTOR & YMIR & REN : The fu--?

EMMA : U-Um?

EMMA : Camus, steady your mind...!

CAMUS : Thank you. With this, I know I'll be fine.

EMMA : ............Huh?

CAMUS : Now then, let's begin.

The duel was finally under way. Once, twice. And even on the third shot, no bullet was fired...

By the fourth round, it was Mam's turn, with little more than the click of the trigger echoing emptily.

CAMUS : The next round will decide it. As expected of you, Mam, you're brave.

MAM : Don't underestimate me, boy. If you've made up your mind for a game of roulette, then all that's left is to enjoy it 'til the very end.

CAMUS : Haha, there's the Mam I've known all my life. I admire your creed.

CAMUS : No matter how deep the darkness, may you always remain passionate and humane.

With trembling hands, Camus pressed the gun to his head. This was it, the moment when the match would be decided.

CAMUS : Mam, please remember. The Boss's words to never be trapped in darkness no matter what.

CAMUS : …You really shouldn't look so sad right now...

He pulled the trigger...

CLICK.

EMMA : (The fifth shot was a blank...! In that case...)

MAM : ...It's my loss…

The tense atmosphere eased, and a sigh of relief escaped. However—

SEVEN : The match isn't over... yet.

At the moment Seven muttered those words—

Mam snatched the gun from Camus's hand, pressing the barrel against her own temple.

MAM: It's only fair to see the match through to the end.

CAMUS: Mam, the wager was the Boss's position not your life.

MAM : I won't stand for it. After everything I’ve done how could I possibly face him again? — I've had enough!

Mam pulled the trigger, and a bullet fired through her.

But it wasn't a bullet fired from the gun in Mam’s hand.

MAM: Ugh...!

JOE : Hahaha! How about that, my aim gets sharper every time!

ACE : You're so cool, big brother!

CROW & ITSUKI & GRANDFLAIR : The Dark Night Duo!

EMMA : Testament...!

TESTAMENT : Haha... what a pointless match…

YMIR : Not at all. Sorry to say but your plan is ruined. Just now, Camus became the new Boss of The Bloody Lady.

TESTAMENT : Yes. Exactly as expected.

EMMA : What...!?

In the distance, we hear a terrifying roar accompanied by footsteps swiftly approaching us.

??? : Uurraaahhhhh!!!

CROW : Those are the guys they infected with the black powder.

━FLASHBACK━

MAN IN BLACK 1 : We’re agents of a family called the Kingsleys. They’re rivals of the Bloody Lady.

━END FLASHBACK━

ITSUKI : Ah, our old patients. I recognize more than a few faces...

NOAH : There must be dozens of them, this is bad.

TESTAMENT : I told them that Mam was trying to kill them.

KINGSLEYS MEMBER 1 : Bloody Lady, you bastards... You'll be done for before you know it!

KINGSLEYS MEMBER 2 : We'll get revenge for our fallen comrades!!

TESTAMENT : Haha, we're all having such a wonderful time now, aren't we?

BLOODY LADY MEMBER 1 : Ugh!

BLOODY LADY MEMBER 2 : Everyone open fire!!

EMMA : Wait, don't use those guns!!

My shout was in vain... Bloody Lady members opened fire using the guns they'd stored in the warehouse.

KINGSLEYS MEMBER 2 : Hahaha!

One by one. People hit by the bullets were swallowed by the black miasma, losing consciousness.

CROW : I'll stop them!

NOAH : Stop who? There's shooting on both sides!

CROW : Then we'll take them all out! Its the only way to keep them safe!

ITSUKI : Emma, can the Black Fairies handle being out in the open right now?

EMMA : Everyone!

NAVI : Ugh. Such a horrible situation~

NAVI : Negative human emotion is always so thick. Ah... it's too tragic.

EVAN : Ugh, those damned guns! Hey, what the hell do you guys think you're doing!?

GRANDFLAIR : Are you all okay?

HIMMEL : Don't worry. We've recovered quite a bit.

HIMMEL : That said… Trying to purify this many people? It's reckless to say the least…

EMMA : But, we have to try! Let's lend them our strength!

[thatmarvelobsessedteen]

Not planned...not at all

Cassian x reader

Azriel x OC! reader'scousin

Short Summary: Two girls, cousins, somehow find themselves inside a slightly modified version of their favorite book saga ACOTAR. What will happen to them, things have changed and not just their situation but themselves...are those pointy ears they now have?

Chapter 9

We finally entered a very large room, after climbing far too many stairs from the weird dungeon area, it looked similar to a living room although it was connected to a kitchen, a dinning room and what looked like a small bar?

Oh well fucking drunks, it's what happens when energy drinks don't exist I guess! A lot more people drink.

I quickly realize there's people on the couches and arm chairs, which of course is where Rhysand is guiding us. He must have mentally called them, like "surprise meetings get your asses to the living room".

Knowing there would be far more people Roxanne already had her bad bitch look that clearly said fuck off from a mile away meanwhile I moved to her side resting a hand on her shoulder to keep her close.

There were five women sitting there, 4 four of them looked to be either in a constant bad mood or just plainly powerful the fifth one was just there. Meanwhile almost on the other side of the room was another man, a red head, leaning against a wall with a bored but tired look.

Leaning over I whispered to Roxy with a wide smile.

"We're after the cauldron shower, but not too long after, Elaine still looks fucking traumatised"

I try and keep my words as low as possible but as Roxanne snickers I also notice what I can only guess to be Nesta openly glaring at us.

Oh she thought she was scary?!

Giving Roxanne a tap on her shoulder I give her a look that meant no limits. If her face earlier had seemed unapproachable right now she just looked ready to gut whoever crossed her or just looked for too long. Of course knowing I can't manage that type of look unless I'm actually mad I just smirk over my cousin's shoulder giving the "lady of death" a wink.

Oh she got mad, let me tell you! The woman must still not be used to people not shivering in fear at her feet cuz she looked about to get up although quickly stopped by a collective look thrown her way.

No one was really saying anything, well I imagine they were just not aloud or to us which was weird and uncomfortable to say the least.

So I started tapping my foot distracted and trying not to further embarrass myself in front of this many people. At some point my brain had simply turned off while looking out of the windows that led to the balcony, the view was breathtaking I might as well enjoy it while they mentally debate on whether or not to kill us.

Eventually I'm humming along to All the ways by Megan Trainor with that stupid smile I just have while imagining myself as the protagonist of every book I've read, being loved fiercely and endlessly.

Of course Roxanne knowing me noticed and whisper sang some of the words as we both swayed side to side like idiots.

"Don't be afraid babe come on explain"

[edgessunflower]

If possible could you do a Kait Diaz x Fem Reader where reader is extremely overprotective and when reader and Kait get into a argument over reader being overprotective thats gets so heated that kait ends up saying that their relationship was a mistake and reader tells Kait to go to hell and when reader runs past Del, JD and Marcus crying they find out why and Marcus and JD confronts Kait for making reader cry and Marcus explains to Kait why reader is overprotective

AWWW YESSS FINALLY GEARS REQUESTS! ☺️

Not a mistake

Pairing: Kait Diaz x Fem reader

Description: After stepping in during an argument, Kait finds out why you are protective of her

Warning: Minor Swearing

You follow Kait after getting in between her and Del as they argue, getting in between telling them not to argue on it now but to instead focus on finishing getting back to Baird. "Listen I know how you are when I act like this but I have to" she turns to you sighing as you holster your gun on your back "I told you to stop I can handle myself" you hold your breath as you place your hands on your hips "I know that and I have never doubted you in anything why would I do that now?" "Maybe you think of me in a way you know I don't want to be thought of as" your eyebrows raise and your mouth opens "You know damn well I would never think of you like that, you have never been and never will be a burden especially to me we make mistakes sometimes and we learn from them when we know what-" she stops you by hitting her fist into the wall next to her "Maybe things between us and this relationship was the mistake I needed to find out!". your eyes widen, filling with tears as you feel the most gut wrenching pain you have ever felt from words in your life seeing her blurred face realizing what she said "If you mean it and if I was a mistake to you then you can go to hell!" you can't hold in the sobs anymore as you run away with her following behind bumping and running in between del and Marcus who immediately notice the indescribable emotional pain written on your face going to ride on one of the bikes you all had when JD grabs your arm "Hey what happened look at me" you jerk your arm away jogging away until you stop and fall to your knees sobbing. You feel hands on you flinching as you look to see kait but instead seeing a concerned del "Hey it's okay you're not a mistake you have people who care about you" you sob even more as he hugs you while the other three watched feeling many different emotions and feelings at the heartbreaking scene in front of them "What the fuck did you say to her?!" she turns looking at a pissed off jd and an equally pissed marcus staring at her "I didn't mean it it slipped out I was just upset.." she feels all the anger she had at what happened earlier disappear now feeling filled with guilt by what she said to you "You clearly did otherwise she wouldn't be like that!" pointing to you being hugged by del shaking and sobbing in his shoulder as he gets very close to kait, "YOU DID THE ONE THING THAT SHE WAS AFRAID OF EVERYONE DOING TO HER THAT SHE DIDN'T THINK YOU WOULD DO!" he is pulled back by marcus who yells as well "SHE HAS ALREADY BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH SHIT, SHE DOESN'T NEED TO GO THROUGH MORE WHEN SHE DOESN'T HAVE TO ESPECIALLY BECAUSE YOUR PISSED OFF OVER A FUCKING PLAN!" she feels the tears pour as she just wants to grab and hold you to her "She knows you can handle yourself but that doesn't ease her mind...she's protective over you because other than us you are all that she has" she looks at marcus as you feel yourself calm down thanking del for staying with you. "She lost her family when she was younger...they got killed in front of her and she didn't have anyone else but my parents so they took her in and raised her...that's why we know each other she's not just my best friend she's my sister and dad is her dad too" she feels her heart break even more realizing that you cared so much that you were afraid to lose her, you walk to the bike stopping when marcus and jd stand in front of you hugging them both tightly before you all leave reaching baird talking for hours until you all decided to rest for awhile feeling a hand on your arm turning only to see someone's shoulder and hearing crying next to your ear. "I am so sorry If I had known I would have never said what I did please forgive me baby" you tear up all over again hugging back swaying side to side until you both calmed down talking and promising to talk to each other calmly or just give the other space when something happened sealing the promise with a kiss going to her room for well deserved rest wrapped in each other's arms under the covers.

[sethdomain]

Hazbin hotel season 1 honest totally unbiased review /lies

Pro's

-Awesome musical with great talent like Husk VA's (I'am weak to musical that sounds like hamilton rap writing sorry)

-Yuri🎉🎉🎉🎉

-fun animation to look at, they were definitely competent i applaud the animator to be able to animate vivziepop character design.

-Great sets of character and personality and great premise with potential that is fun to think about

-Circus art direction is derivative and cool

-Worldbuiding is fun

-It doesn't really fall into the cliche where it doesnt take itself seriously because its afraid the audience will find it corny

-Cool character design, as much as i roast the show for their twink tumblr sexyman factory design, they do sometimes cook hard af

-Chaggie

-Have i ever told you i love Chaggie

-Charlie and Vagina

Con's

-The most glaring issue is their horrible pacing, clearly lacks episode that fill us in silly hijinks that make us grew more attached with the character more or episode that explore the world around the character. Because of this the season 1 feel like a 3 season packed heavy lore into one season with frankenstein stitching

-Too much telling, not showing. They don't show us much stuff like how heaven is also bad in its own way, but just tell us through musical number.

-Lacks of character building for many character, many character see to still be used in a very little amount in the show, mainly the main cast. I think Angel Dust has the most character developtment in the show, but still in the standar of things if im being honest all the main cast is lacking. They feel like an unearned character developtment, like they just developt off screen and we as the viewer did not get to experience that at all, we just get told that now they have fit 2 whole season worth of character building now and we have to come to term with that.

-Lacks world exploring, Listen bruh explore hell or shit especially HEAVEN

-Repetitive character design trope, bruh stop putting goddamn twinks im scared of them

-Some episode have nauseating camera panning

-Cluttered character design, Some character design just have so much detail in them it hurt me eyesss

-when will Chaggie do scissoring🎉🎉🎉

-You dont get it i need my women filthy, iam so GAY

-can we put the butch in Charlie i think that would be awesome🔥🔥🔥🔥

-lacks CHAGGIE, I NEED THEM ON SCREEN 24/7 IDC IF ITS BAD WRITING /jokes

---------

So, basically I think Hazbin Hotel is a very fun show with great concept, but unfortunately it rush thing too soon.

I genuinely believe if they don't blow it off with a bang and make it like a standard cartoon per episode like SVTFOE where we get silly hijinks and sometime gut wrenching episode they can still run to maybe about to season 4 i think, well it depends if the audience might save them... Hazbin isnt exactly a highly celebrated show because of viv.

And for special coverage about the SA/victim angel plotline, i truly dont gave a fuck about him but i think people blow it off too far. I don't think Angel is a bad SA representation, i think the show did decently on representing him as victim and Val as a abuser.

They don't glorify Val and they clearly put Angel Dust as a survivor first. For how the scene 'poison' representing, how people feel about that I truly cannot control what people think of that and it is a mixed bag, some people say its bad some say its fine, I think its okay-ish some frame is a bit icky thought, i can admit that but it does supposed to make you uncomfortable and it does make sense for Angel Dust as a character. But still, in some shot the line between horryfying oh shit he's being sexually abused to holy shit rape hot sexy times gets REAL blurry.

Sorry not sorry if there are so much CONS in this, but i truly only do that to the show im truly invested in. Its to show that i want to think how a show could be better and how much i cared

[thessalian]

Astrid vs the Goblin Camp

But first, some Visitations

Rafael: Oooh, looks like you're in a spot of bother. I could probably help with that ... for a price.

Astrid: Um ... thank you for the ... very kind offer. And ... you know, the banquet and everything, though I've got a bit of a thing about powerful magical entities and foodstuffs after the Hag And Undead Husband Incident--

Rafael: ...Sorry, how am I hearing the capital letters on that one?

Gale: She insists it's fractional pauses between words. I still can't quite manage it myself. Perhaps it's a bardic talent.

Astrid: Anyway, I'm afraid we're a little full up on deals with beings from the various hells. I mean, still not really liking The Actually A Tiefling Incident very much--

Wyll: I did apologise for that!

Astrid: Not blaming you! I mean, I was pretty suspicious too until The Exploding Hyena Incident. ...Look, sorry, but I think we'll find a way that doesn't involve an open-ended bargain with a demon, or a devil, or whichever sort of entity you are because you're clearly on that end of the spectrum. But thank you very much for the offer, and have a lovely day.

Rafael: You'll be back. ...Though now I really have to wonder--

Astrid: You'll be The Demon Dinner Party Incident.

Rafael: ...Ah.

And again...

Spooky Whispers: Find the Prism for the Absolute and--

Shadowheart: FUCK. OFF.

Spooky Whispers: *do, in fact, FUCK. OFF*

Astrid: Okay, I think I've been really good about not asking about the whatsit so far. But now I kind of have to ask. What is the whatsit?!?

Shadowheart: Honestly not sure, but most of my memories are being held as collateral until I get it to Baldur's Gate.

Astrid: Oh. So ... when I asked a little more about you...

Shadowheart: Well, yes, that was mostly the memory loss, but part of it was trust issues. But if it helps, I like night orchids, and I can't swim.

Astrid: ...I will find you ALL the night orchids. And maybe teach you to swim. If you want. Might take less armour, though.

Shadowheart: *perks up*

Controller Person: *starts seriously rethinking romance choices*

And, because infiltrating a goblin stronghold is the best time for this

Gale: Okay, so draining magical artefacts isn't so much working anymore and if I don't do something about this really ill-considered gift to my last lover, I am going to explode.

Astrid: ...I'm generally willing to leave the past as your business, but I kind of want to know who your last lover was that a gift you gave her is enough to kerboom you.

Gale: Um ... Mystra ... as it happens...

Astrid: ...wut.

Gale: Also ... the explosion wouldn't just kill me. It'd take out an area about the size of Waterdeep.

Astrid: ...................How much do we need to have extracted from you?!?

Astarion: So ... Shadowheart ... you wouldn't happen to have--

Shadowheart: No! Unless that's something they made me forget, but ... almost certainly no!

Astarion: Well, there you have it. Either Astrid feels she couldn't possibly match up favourably to Gale's ex, or he explodes and takes himself out of the running.

Shadowheart: Shut up!

Astarion: Oh. Oh. You'd accept pining from afar if it meant she didn't have to feel the pain of someone she cares about dying! You, a cleric of Shar, no less!

Shadowheart: My greatclub could be sharpened to a stake, Astarion...

But finally, into the Shattered Sanctum

High Priestess Gut: So you wanted to talk?

Astrid: Ummmmmmmm ... not so much. *pulls lute; to the tune of The Sound of Silence* "Hello goblin, my new foe / You are a creepy so-and-so / Since you're making all the tieflings stressed / We've come to do the violence we do best / And your allies / Won't hear your cries for help / Not a yelp / Because I'm caaaasting Silence..."

High Priestess Gut: ............*mouthing obscenities*

Astarion: *critical-hit SHANKs her to death*

Astrid: ...Anyone else think it's kind of ironic that a spell that makes a Silence has verbal components?

And, a little further in

Minthara: Go burn down the druid grove!

Astrid: Oh, for-- how many times are we going to have to save it from you idiots?!?

Minthara: Owowowow!

Astrid: Whoops. ...Wait, what am I saying; I mean good! 'Scuse me, Astarion...

Astarion: Waitwut--

Astrid: *performs dive-bomb on lute and Thunderwaves Minthara right into the chasm, destroying the bridge in the process*

Shadowheart: ...I have to admit, that's a lot more impressive than "yeet".

Astarion: Yes, but I can't jokingly copy that one.

Astrid: *shooting at Scrying Eye* Slay now, praise later, please and thank you! There's going to be backup, and unless they have the jumping prowess of a turtle, the bridge being out won't keep them at range for long!

Astarion: Ah, yes, but two can play at that game. *leaps over chasm, grabs goblin, FEEDS*

Gale: You had to give him those boots, didn't you.

Astrid: I was very disappointed that they didn't give him bunny ears.

And, awhile later

Ragzlin: The mind flayer corpse won't talk!

Astrid: I could ask some questions, if you want...

Ragzlin: You're a bard; you can talk good. FINE.

Astrid: What ... is your name?

Ragzlin: ...What the--?

Astrid: What ... is your quest?

Ragzlin: ...I don't--

Astrid: What ... is the airspeed velocity of an unladen bugbear?

Ragzlin: Hey, waitaminit--

Astrid: *Thunderwave dive-bomb on the lute*

Ragzlin: *goes flying*

Astrid: No convenient chasms here, though. Shame.

Stabnation: *ensues*

And, during a really needed long rest...

Astrid: So ... I've talked to Wyll about the pact he really needs out of, Gale about the ... kerboom thing, and Shadowheart about her whole deal. Want to tell me about the monster hunter?

Astarion: My master in Baldur's Gate wants me back, apparently. And there's nothing we can do about it if he wants to take me, so I'm not even sure why I'm bothering to tell you this.

Astrid: Do you even look at the things I ask you to carry?

Astarion: *peers into haversack* Alchemist's fire and ... what's this?

Astrid: Holy water, or so Shadowheart tells me.

Astarion: What the f-- are you trying to kill me?!?

Astrid: No, I would have put it in your wine if I was trying to kill you with it.

Astarion: That ... is a singularly horrible mental image, but go on...

Astrid: Just because those things work against you doesn't mean you can't use those things against other vampires. And you have options he doesn't. Like, being out in the daytime.

Astarion: You are suicidally overconfident ... and yet all of that might work. Yes, I think I'll echo Shadowheart here: I fear you.

Shadowheart: I do not fear her anymore!

Astarion: Oh, nonsense you don't; you just worry that your devotion to Shar might get in the way of--

Shadowheart: *throws a half-rotted treacle tart at Astarion's head*

Astrid: ...I was wondering why you were carrying those around. Anywaaaaay... How about we get some rest because we still have to find Haslin down in the pits and we should probably rescue Volo too.

Astarion; Gale; Shadowheart; Wyll: Volo's an arse!

Astrid: Yes, but he's an arse that doesn't deserve to be rump roast for goblins, okay?!? They were cooking dwarf out there!

Astarion: Still, couldn't I just take a minor nibble?

Astrid: Gods, no. Stupid might be catching.

Gale: So you can be insulting about people when you're out of range?

Astrid: That or he has a really bad headache right now. Either way.

[fyeahmeddy]

fic idea i keep mulling over; PB investigating finn's previous incarnations as mythological figures in human history and before, ultimately manifesting in her having dreams where she speaks with Finn in two previous incarnations in the dream world: one is Lugh, the Irish god king of all the arts and civilization, and the other is Cu Chulainn, the great Irish culture hero, whose remarks on their lives clearly evoke the recurring elements of Finn's life cycles. Focusing also on Lugh who infamously lost an arm, replacing it with a silver prosthetic, evoking Finn's repeated loss of arms; this suggests its another element, and PB is distraught and frustrated that there is clearly a connection, some theme she cannot isolate, and she is upset because she thinks if she could figure it out she could save him for once, end the cycle of death and rebirth and tragedy

they comfort her, in their ways; PB sees Cu Chulainn dying with pride as he binds himself to a stone with his own guts, still standing on his feet as he passes and his foes too afraid to approach for hours afterwards. She sees the mighty works of Lugh shape cultures and nations; but ah, the names of those cultures are lost. The stories of humanity are extinguished, just as humanity itself will slowly fade away. Perhaps they are already extinct; the last embers of a fire that was snuffed out a long time ago, finally winking out and leaving with nothing more than a sense of relief. Lugh still comforts her, in a language she does not speak. She understands anyway. "Everything ends, Princess. Men die, worlds die, civilizations die. The deeds people do and the impact they leave behind lasts longest but in time that ends too. All things fade away; it is not to be grieved, and it is simply the way of things. Learn to let go. The illusion of control will wound you and keep wounding you. Let go of this knife you keep so close to your chest. I will return, as new life comes to this world and new nations take form. There will always be a battle to be fought and a good cause to be found. You will find it, but permanency is not something you can find or build. Let go." His silver hand departs, and it feels just like the way Finn's did, before he faded away. She awakens with little memory, only a terrible sadness and those words still lingering on her mind: "All things end. All things fade. The illusion of control kills every day."

this is fucking beautiful, dude! I don't think I can add more to it :')

[rose-tinted-juls]

finally i'm finished with my bachelor's thesis and have time to read again! what a feeling!! let's celebrate that with one of my all time favourite stories and a lil list of my fave things about this chapter.

1. i don't even know why but i giggled so hard at the "i don't think anyone would believe i'm at a primary school's art fair in the middle-of-nowhere America" bc i just imagined him irl appearing someplace this random and how it would be. just to imagine him surrounded with kids though at an art fair is making me melt actually

2. the way charles blushes when she calls him charlie!!! he's just so asfwurjfkadsd

3. the two little boys nash and wyatt and the way their faces light up when they find chris and the way they speak with this child-like broken english is just so adorable and also so good and real.

4. "she picks him up from the airport late friday night, just in time to bicker in the middle of a liquor store about wine" had me cackling. they are such a couple. otp for real. + honestly the way charles is just horrified at the idea that chris wants to buy wine in a box is so funny especially when i can clearly imagine him in this situation

5. when charles greets bill and cindy without chris being around 😭 "he knows how to charm" yes he does i'm sure 😭 "knows he's going to be working at it for a while, probably. he's more than willing to put in the hours" STOPPP. where do i find a charles for myself? 😭

6. "i don't want to have her come if she doesn't feel comfortable" this!!! thank you for being a perfect man charles leclerc.

7. "he's been called a lot of things over the years, but good egg might be a new one" this deserved it's own point in this list bc i can just see the slightly confused look in his eyes hearing someone call him a good egg. so precious.

8. the way chris' accent gets stronger when around her family, and how charles finds it cute and sweet. i don't even know why such a simple thing made my heart happy but it did so i'm adding it to this list.

9. "she slots into her comfortable position at charles' side, and his arm is tossing itself over her shoulder before he even realises it's happening. it's habit, almost, to keep her close." catch me bawling my eyes out over here 😭 + this conversation: "y'all are talking about me?" - "always." bc it's just ahhhh. i love them. if it's not obvious already.

10. "they're cute and annoyingly couple-ey all night" i'm just soft. such a simple sentence and i'm over here melting. + the way chris makes everyone feel the most important in the room when she's talking with them + the way charles starts to remember the names even when there's a lot. as someone coming from a large ass family and family friend circle, i know how hard it is to remember and also appreciate him for even trying in the first place. (+ charles feeling and probably looking awestruck at chris 😭)

11. charles and his inner conflict of do i love her or do i not love her is just *chefs kiss*. the way he feel's like he loves her so much he's almost sick with it. the way he lists things that should make him not love her at all like the box of wine, her driving style, how she cries so easily, the glitter everywhere and country music. and yet. AND YET. "he doesn't love her, and then she laughs and he can feel it in his fucking gut, feels the urge to laugh when he doesn't get the joke [...] he wants to laugh because she's laughing and her laugh makes the world a better place and he loves her so bad it hurts." I'M LITERALLY SOBBING. also charles pls just confess. at least to yourself. you know you love her.

ahh anyway this chapter was just sooooo soft it made me melt many times and it was all i needed right now after months of non-stop stress. mackie, you and your writing style never fail to make my heart flutter and my eyes tear-filled. i love you so so much and unlike charles i'm not afraid to say it lol jk and thank you for yet another amazing chapter of this awesome story. <333

miss americana and the heartbreak prince

—08. It's So Sweet —word count: 5.2k —warnings: none :) love, mackie... um... yeah. yeahhhh. sorry sorry sorry if you still read this fic. surprise I guess! its NOT as dead as you thought it was. See you guys again in four months. hopefully sooner if there is a God.

Charles, teeth dug into his tongue so hard he can taste copper, manages to keep from slipping up for the remainder of his time in Georgia. He swallows it down, chokes on an I love you everytime she looks at him for days that feel like an eternity. 

The flight out to France that marks the end of his stay had spent weeks serving as a dreadful backmarker, but now it was one of solace, saving him from himself. He knows better than to spit out “I love you” two months in. He knows better, but he also knows. Simple as that. He just knows. 

He’s good at keeping it down during phone calls and voice memos and FaceTimes because there’s no fucking way he’s stupid enough to say it over the phone. Whenever he does finally deem the time to be right, it’ll be inches from her face, with all the time in the world ahead of them. Her smile will be there, just waiting to be kissed. 

It definitely will not be while she’s grading papers or reviewing a movie or putting purple refills in her pen, even though he finds himself thinking just how plain and simple he loves her when she’s doing those things. 

– – –

Charles spends the holidays with his family in France, coming pretty much directly from his time with Chris and her family in Georgia. 

They quiz him like there’s no tomorrow about all of it; on Chris, and her family and her city and her life. He thinks he does a half-decent job at keeping his cards close to his chest; hiding his tells and acting completely normal and regular and plain about it all. 

Well. He can be coy and secretive to everyone but his mom. Mother’s always know when their sons are in love, and Pascale has always been particularly apt at seeing straight through her boys and the bullshit they try to feed her. 

He’s helping with dinner dishes—working hard to get those extra points towards being the favorite son this weekend—when she confronts him about it. He knows he’s in trouble. He’s never been able to lie to her in a way that was even sort-of convincing. 

“So, Chris…” she hums, drying three two forks at once with a damp towel. “Is this going to be something?” She asks. Charles shrugs, squeezing more blue dish soap onto the plate in his other hand. “That’s too much,” she remarks. 

He ignores the comment, moves the scrubbing sponge over the plate in small circles. “It’s new, still.”

“But you like her?”

He chuckles. Of course he likes her. He wouldn’t be dating her, traveling to see her, introducing her to his family if he didn’t at least like her. That’d just be cruel. “I like her a lot,” he says. I like her the most, he bites his tongue. He rinses the soap from the plate. 

Pascale nods, soft smile on her lips when she takes the plate from his hand, drying it carefully. “Just like, is that right, Charles?”

He knows what she means, what she’s implying. They both know she’s right, too, but he can’t stand to admit it. He feels like if he does, if he actually speaks the words out loud, there’s no way he’s going to be able to keep it in anymore. It’ll be breaking the seal, and he can’t. Not yet. He doesn’t have it in him yet. “Maman,” he says, and his tone is laced with her answer, soft and sweet and pleading in a desperate way. 

She smiles, sets the plate down onto the counter gently. It still clatters against the marble. “I know,” she hums, hand finding his shoulder, giving it a firm squeeze.

Charles spends New Year’s Eve in London. He’s with his brothers and his friends and like, all of their girlfriends. He’s been pathetically texting her the entire trip going on about i’ll buy your ticket if you want to come and it would be so much more fun with you here.

What Charles doesn’t know is that Chris is on her way, and that she’d been planning the surprise with Joris for three weeks. After a red eye flight from Atlanta that lands a little before two in the afternoon in London, Joris manages to sneak off from the group to meet her at the hotel and give her a key to his room. She hides out there for most of the afternoon while Joris tries to convince the group to head back to the hotel for a few hours without spoiling the surprise of why they should go back to the hotel in the middle of the day. 

When he finally gets them back to the hotel, he waits fifteen minutes to text her the all clear, to let her know that she can come and execute the surprise. 

It takes her an almost comical amount of time to find his room, considering it’s in the same hallway as everyone else’ rooms, and only ends up being three or four doors down from where she’d started. When she finally finds it, she’s hit with a sudden wave of anxiety. 

What if he doesn’t want me here? She worries. Her hands get clammy and she stands there in front of the door like a complete idiot just waiting for her body to do something, to do anything. Finally, she brings her fist to the door and knocks. 

Voices are muffled and heavy feet shuffle on the other side of the door before finally, after what feels like an eternity of loud bickering from the boys about who’s going to open the door, Chris is face to face with Charles, stupid, toothy grin on her face. “Oh,” he says. 

Behind him, the guys jeer in French, but neither of them are paying any attention. Chris can't stop laughing, standing there, staring at Charles in the doorway. He stares right back, his eyes a window into the gears that turn behind them, processing… processing… processing so incredibly slowly. “Are you gonna hug me, or just stare at me?” She finally asks, and he laughs, snapping into reality, pulling her into a tight hug. 

“What are you doing here?” He questions, pressing a hard kiss into her hair, and then he laughs even harder. “How did you get here?”

– – –

Chris isn’t there for more than a couple days—she has to be back at work as winter break winds to a close, and Charles has training camp in Italy at the end of the week. It’s a quick visit, but they make the most of it, and they do get their new year’s eve kiss. 

It’s been, like, a month and a half since Chris was last in Monaco, but it’s been just two and a half weeks since someone posted a TikTok of Charles and her walking around Monte Carlo together. That means, it’s been two weeks of Chris stumbling upon, and falling down rabbit holes of, Charles’ fan accounts desperately trying to put a face to the back of the head of the girl in the video. 

She’s less interested in are they going to figure out who I am and more interested in are they at least, like, close? The answer is no. No, they are not even kind-of close to connecting Chris with him. It’s all models and friends and people he follows on Instagram and even one ex-girlfriend, but definitely no American kindergarten teachers. 

The fire is only fed, though, when on New Year’s Eve, drunk on Moscow Mules and equipped with the world’s most fashionable LED glasses, Charles is posted showing off the look. Under his arm, equally as drunk off espresso martinis, is Chris, engaged in conversation with Joris beside her. 

It’s been two-thousand twenty-three for fifteen minutes, and Instagram explore pages across the world are already filled with pictures of the side of her head and Charles’ goofy heart-eyed glasses.

Chris is too drunk to know, much less care, but when she does find out about it, she won’t be bothered. She thinks that maybe she never will be a big deal—certainly not as big of one as he seems to think it is. Nothing is going to happen, she tells him so many times it doesn’t even sound like a sentence anymore. Who cares if everyone figures out who I am?

January isn’t much but settling into a routine. They’re both busy with a million and one different things—just a little peek into any sort of future they hope to have together—and it’s the end of the month before they see each other in person again. 

Every post he makes on social media—every video, photo, story, mention, and repost is run through a microscope, carefully dissected searching for a repeat like and commenter, for an unfamiliar woman’s voice or a hand or a coat or a head of hair. Names fly around in a tornado of guesses, and none of them are correct. 

It’s an easy routine to fall into; scheduled phone calls, FaceTime dates twice a week, and sneakily sent texts in the middle of the workday. Sometimes it feels like they aren’t all that far apart, like he could walk out the front door and get into his car and drive for fifteen minutes and be at her house, eat dinner at the same table, fall asleep at the same time, in the same bed. Other times, they can feel every step of the four-thousand, six-hundred, ninety-five miles that separate them, when it’s all pictures of dinner and goodmorning texts seen three hours later and delayed, laggy FaceTime calls. 

It’s on one of those calls, where her face is frozen mid-conversation, that she’s gushing about how excited she is for some school event at the end of the month, the Art show, she’d called it, and when—after sorting out the camera issue for the time being—he’d asked for clarification on what exactly an Art show is, she’d explained the whole event with a big, excited smile on her face. 

“Oh my gosh!” She’d laughed, pulling her legs underneath her. “Okay, so, it’s the coolest thing. Basically, the art department displays all of the art the students have made so far this year all throughout the year, and the kids get to show it off to all their family. They set up a book fair in the library, and they serve ice-cream in the cafeteria,” she explains, “All the teachers go, and they bring their families, too,” she nods. “It’s really cool. I like to see how proud the kids are of their work.”

He decides then, in that very moment, that he doesn’t want to hear about this in text messages and photos and Facetime calls. He wants to be there—feel her energy, her pride, her smile. It just pours out of his mouth, what if I came? And then, before she can even come up with a response, If that’s okay, obviously. If you even would like, want that, you know. 

She bites down on a smile. “I thought you wanted to keep things quiet?” she chuckles, “be all protective of me and stuff?” 

Charles shrugs. “I don’t think anyone would believe I’m at a primary school’s art-fair in the middle-of-nowhere America.”

“I mean, I don’t care,” she explains, tucking her bangs behind her ears. “But you do. I’d love it if you could be there.”

He smiles. “You’d love it?”

“I would!” She laughs, leaning forward, closer to the camera. “You’d better come for more than just a day though,” she continues, slumping back against the couch behind her, picking at the cuticles on her thumb, raising her brows when she quietly adds: “I can think of lots of other things I’d love to do with you.”

He shakes his head, dimples digging into his cheeks. “You’re a tease, Christyn,” he taunts, and her head shoots up from her cuticle. 

“You have such a dirty mind, Charlie!” she laughs, and his cheeks burn at the nickname, at the accusation. 

“Don’t call me that,” he mutters, and she only laughs harder, smiles bigger. 

“Why?” She teases, crossing her arms over her chest, cocking her head to the side playfully.  “Because it makes you blush?”

– – – 

There’s really only one of Chris’ students that Charles knows by name: Quinn. Or, as Chris usually refers to her, my sweet, sweet, little Quinnie. Quinnie is not at the art show. Chris goes on to explain that she and her family are  never at any of the school events—no open houses, no field trips, no choir recitals or art shows or parent teacher conferences. If it’s not a free event that takes place during school hours, neither Quinn or her siblings will be there, and their Mother will never be there because she’s always at work. 

So, no Quinn to win over. He does, however, meet what may be the cutest kid he’s ever been face-to-face with in Landry, a little girl with two long brown braids and a strawberry patterned dress on. Landry is the first of her students to find their teacher, and completely ignores him to tug Chris’ arm towards the little girl’s artwork hung in the hallway. 

“I’ll be right back,” she says hurriedly, over her shoulder, letting the little girl pull her away. Charles nods and flashes her a quick wink before she’s properly whisked away, leaving him with nothing better to do than shove his hands deep in his pockets and analyze the artwork of primary school students. 

When she finds him again, no Landry in tow, she links her arm through his, leaning her head against his shoulder. “She told me I have a cute boyfriend,” she says.

“No, she did not,” He laughs, but his ears blush pink. 

“She did,” she nods. “She said you were ‘oh my goodness he is soooooo cute,’” Chris repeats, in a sing-songy tone. “I said, ‘I know right! He’s the cutest.’”

“Whatever,” Charles mutters, running his other hand through his hair. “Where’s the ice-cream at, anyway?”

Two styrofoam bowls of vanilla ice-cream slices—one covered in rainbow sprinkles, the other with chocolate syrup and a maraschino cherry—later, and Chris and Charles are sitting at Chris’ desk in her classroom, him in the green spinning chair, her on the desk itself. 

Two boys, who Chris refers to after they leave the room as Nash and Wyatt, are bouncing off the walls with excitement when they turn the corner into Chris’ classroom, their faces lighting up when they find her there. “Miss Elliott!” One of them shouts, half-out of breath. “The book fair has posters of your brother!” He explains. 

“Yeah!” The other chimes in. “I see-ed it when my sister was getting a poster of,” he takes a big breath, “of, uh, a princess poster or something.”

“Yeah, and I get-ted this one!” The first kid adds, unrolling the paper in this hand to reveal a black and white Fortnite poster, demonstrating the dances from the game. “Cool right?” He asks, and Chris nods. 

“So cool!” She says, “where are you going to hang it?” 

Charles leans back in the chair, spinning slightly side to side, eating his ice-cream and just observing the interaction. 

“Um, probably in my bedroom.”

Chris nods again, “perfect place for it,” she agrees. 

– – – 

He’s in Georgia for three days; Friday to Sunday, and spends all of it with Chris, almost entirely at her house. The art show is on Friday night, but he finds himself playing sleepover host with Chris on Saturday when Reid appears with a backpack, a pillow, and a baby blanket Chris tells him not to refer to as a baby blanket. 

Chase is racing in Los Angeles this weekend, and left town on Tuesday, leaving Hannah alone on Mom duty. That would be all fine, if the weekend didn’t fall on the one weekend a month she works. Bill, Cindy, Chris, and Hannah’s mom have been helping to pick up the slack left in Chase’ absence. 

It all comes together to result in him sitting in the middle of the living room, on the floor, surrounded by every blanket and pillow in the entire house on a Saturday night—a four-year-old boy sitting across from him, hanging on his every word, and his girlfriend in the other room making popcorn. 

He’s been tasked with coming up with, and executing the plan for a super, super, cool boy-fort that Auntie Chris can come into, I guess. 

A fort that fits into that description is a lot easier in theory. In Practice, however, he’s faced with the nephew he desperately needs the approval of, and a pile of purple and pink and sparkly and fluffy blankets and pillows. 

It takes all four of the dining table chairs, a curtain rod from the screened-in porch, a fitted sheet, and a box fan, but the fort is quickly commissioned, and gets Reid’s stamp of approval when he moves his pillow, favorite blanket, and definitely not a baby-blanket, baby-blanket into the build. 

Chris is behind them momentarily, knocking on the seat of one of the dining chairs before Reid permits her to enter. She crawls in, laptop and big bowl of popcorn in either hand. Reid is sandwiched between the two of them, Cars blanket covering his little frame, eyes glued to the screen while buttery fingers bury themselves in the popcorn bowl. 

Reid is asleep about five minutes after the popcorn bowl is empty, Chris running her fingers through his short brown hair while soft little snores leave his lips. Her head rests on his pillow, just above his head, and she watches the movie. Charles watches her, arm propped up at the elbow, holding his head up. She’s so soft. So sweet. It ties him up in knots. 

He feels like a child when she catches him staring, her eyes glancing over to him and making unexpected contact. His cheeks burn and his eyes dart away, back to the screen, to the movie. She giggles softly, barely loud enough for him to hear over his sudden mortification.  “Beautiful fort you’ve built here,” she says, and he looks back at her, meets her eyes properly this time. 

“Thank you,” he chuckles. “I’m thinking maybe I will make it my new career after racing.” Charles nods. Chris nods. A smile dances its way across her lips, turning the corners up gently. It makes him smile, too. “Charles Leclerc: Professional fort builder.”

“Oh,” She chuckles. “I can hear it now. You’ll be a household name.”When Charles wakes up, credits are rolling on the laptop screen and Chris’ hand is moving softly over his shoulder. He’s the bridge of his nose and picking the sleep out of his eyes and trying to get his bearings. All he’s sorted out so far is that Chris is here, he’s fucking boiling, and there’s a sleeping kid between them. He squints his eyes—like the dim light from the black credit screen is too bright for him—until she comes into focus. She points to the exit of the fort. “Bed,” she mouths.

“Well,” Chris shrugs, bringing a forkful of salad to her mouth. “I think you’ve won Reid over.”

Charles laughs on her phone screen. He’s in Italy… or Monaco… or… she’s not really sure, to be honest. It’s hard to keep track sometimes, when he’s always somewhere new. He’s in bed, wherever he is, the lamp from her kitchen casting the only light in his dark room. “Is that right?”

“Oh yeah,” she nods. “I had the pleasure of  reminding him you weren’t here this afternoon. He wasn’t happy with me.” She remembers it well, his declaration that Charles and Me are going to play games today, and remembers better the little, defeated oh, right after she had to remind him Charles had left the day before. 

Charles chuckles, shaking his head and rolling his eyes playfully. “I told him goodbye!”

“I know!” She says, taking another bite, her hand covering her mouth while she talks around the lettuce. “He thought you meant goodbye for the day,” she explains, swallowing. “Not goodbye for a while.”

Charles frowns. “Shit, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize!” Chris laughs, poking her fork around her bowl. “I love that he likes you so much, it’s adorable,” she hums. “He’s absolutely devastated you won’t be at his birthday party, though.”

Charles scoffs, his mouth dramatically falling open. “No way. You didn't tell me it was his birthday!”

“Because it’s not for like, two weeks!” She defense, laughing. “I wasn’t even thinking about it.”

“When is it?”

She cocks her head to the side, already knowing what he’s about to say, and unscrews the top of her water bottle. “His birthday’s the sixteenth, but the party is the eighteenth.”

“I’ll be there.”

“No you won’t. You have testing.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Yeah,” she insists. “On Monday you have to be in Bahrain.”

“Monday is not Saturday.”

Chris doesn’t tell anyone outside of Chase and Hannah that Charles is flying in, and they definitely don’t tell Reid about it, just in case it falls through for any of the million reasons it could possibly fall through because of. 

It was a last minute-trip, after all, and it seems like every second of Charles’ time is accounted for right now, so  Chris is prepared at any moment to get a text or a call apologetically explaining that he got pulled into something else. That call never comes, and she picks him up from the airport late Friday night, just in time to bicker in the middle of a liquor store about wine. 

“Absolutely not, baby.” He says, shaking his head, a truly horrified look on his face. 

“You don’t even drink wine!” She insists, holding a three-liter box of Franzia. “This is perfectly fine.”

His eyes go wide, brows raising like he can’t believe what he’s hearing. “It’s in a box.”

She rolls her eyes. “It’s for a fifth birthday party.”

“It’s not for the five-year-old,” he argues, picking two bottles of overpriced chardonnay from the shelf. “We’ll get these.”

– – – 

Much to the dismay of the other, they show up to the party the next afternoon with one box and one bottle. 

Reid is upstairs playing with some kid that Chris is related to somehow, she’s sure, so their arrival goes unnoticed by the birthday boy. Instead, Chris is heaving the box of wine onto the kitchen island, greeting a visibly stressed Hannah with a hug. Charles follows closely behind, setting his bottle down next to her box, following the hug train to Hannah. 

“Look great, as always, Hannah,” He says, and Hannah laughs. 

“I’m a mess, the house is a mess. Reid,” she looks to Chris, “Lord have mercy on me, your nephew has dressed himself.”

Chris scowls, and then shrugs. Charles laughs. “He can be Chandler’s nephew, today,” she says. 

“He’s still your godson, though,” Hannah reminds. 

“Oh, don’t I know it!”

Charles takes Chris’ coat with his own, hands them both up in the mud room that’s just off the kitchen. He hears Hannah calling for Reid while he does it, telling him to come down and say hello to your auntie. Auntie Chris. He loves the way Reid says it—Annie Chris—or, when he really wants to stir some shit up, which Charles has come to learn is just about all of the time, Reid will call her Miss Elliott. 

Everyone hears him before they see him, little feet making heavy noises as they hurry down the stairs so quickly he might as well have just jumped off the landing and tuck’n’rolled his way into the kitchen. He’s bouncing on his feet, talking to Chris animatedly with his back turned to Charles when he appears in the mud-room doorway. Immediately, Chris is glancing up to him and covering Reid’s eyes with her hands, turning him to face Charles. “I have a surprise for you, Reidy.”

“What?” He squirms. “What is it?”

“More like who is it?” Hannah says, and Reid gasps. 

“Chucky?” He asks, and Chris is grinning at Charles, adjusting her hands over the boy’s eyes so one hand covers them both. With the other hand, she pokes Reid’s side right where he’s ticklish and makes him giggle. 

“Who?” She asks, his belly laugh making her laugh, too. 

“Sharles!” Reid exclaims, breathless from laughing so hard. “Sha-rle,” He laughs out, enunciating the poorly mocked accent.

“Wrong,” Chris says, and then takes her hand off his eyes to reveal Charles. 

Reid is slamming into Charles’ legs before he can even squat down to give the kid a proper hug, settling for just hugging his legs. “You comed!” He cheers. 

“Come on, Mate!” Charles says, ruffling the little boy’s hair. “You didn’t think I would miss such an important birthday?”

Chris watches the whole interaction with a giddy smile on her face. Hannah watches, too, while she stirs a crock pot full of nacho cheese. Reid fills Charles in on everything that’s happened to him since Charles left, and is already asking if Charles wants to go play catch outside with the football he’s gotten from his dad earlier that week, on his actual birthday. When Hannah slides behind Chris, between her body and the cabinets, muttering a quick behind you and grabbing a ladle from a drawer, she gives Chris’ shoulder a soft squeeze. 

– – – 

Chris is MIA when Bill and Cindy turn up, arms full of food and gifts for their only grandchild, but Charles is in the backyard, standing around a smoking fire pit with Chase and Reid and other people he remembers meeting from the wedding, but who’s names he wouldn’t be able to remember if there was a gun held to his temple. 

Bill and Cindy wander out shortly after they arrive, looking for the birthday boy, and Charles handles the introductions all by himself—a handshake to Dad, a compliment to Mom, and hugs for both of them. He knows how to charm. Knows he’s going to be working at it for a while, probably. He’s more than willing to put in the hours. 

“I didn’t know you were comin’, son,” Bill says, and Charles is nodding, hands in his jacket pockets, rocking back and forth on his heels.

“Yeah, it was a kind of… last minute choice.”

“Aw,” Cindy hums. “What a sweetheart. How long are you in town for?”

“Just a couple days,” he explains. “Chris is off work this week, but I have to get to Bahrain in a couple days. Get used to the timezone and everything.”

“Ah,” Bill nods. “Season’s starting up again, that right?”

“Eh,” he shrugs. “It never stops, it feels like,” and Bill nods. 

“Don’t I know it, boy.”

“Is Chrissy planning on coming out to any of your races?” Cindy asks, linking her arm through Bill’s, leaning against him around the fire. “I know she told us that y’all are keeping it pretty hush-hush for now.”

“Eventually, I hope she can,” he says. “I don’t want to have her come if she doesn’t feel comfortable.”

Cindy nods, smiling to herself. “Smart answer, honey,” she says, and Bill laughs. “You’re a good egg.” Charles chuckles softly, if only because he doesn’t know what to say to that. He’s been called a lot of things over the years, but good egg might be a new one. 

Just then, Chris is pushing open the sliding door on the back deck, stepping out with her coat on, the hood pulled up over her head, her hands hidden in the sleeves. “Well, speak of the Devil,” Bill says, greeting his daughter with a tight hug. 

“Uh oh,” Chris laughs, following suit with a hug for her mom, too. “Y’all are talking about me?”

He’s come to learn that her accent is never anywhere as strong as it is when she's around family. He’s familiar with the pattern of it, and does the same thing after long breaks away from speaking English or Italian. It takes a while to settle back into translating your thoughts. He thinks it’s probably pretty similar, even if she’s not translating from another language. He thinks it’s cute, when the southern twang gets extra prominent. It’s cute, and it’s sweet, and she sounds like a movie character sometimes. 

She slots into her comfortable position at Charles’ side, and his arm is tossing itself over her shoulder before he even realizes it’s happening. It’s habit, almost, to keep her close. “Always,” he says. 

– – –

They’re cute and annoyingly couple-ey all night. He doesn’t care if she’s related to or friends with almost everyone here, he’s never not amazed at just how easily she can find home in any conversation. Sometimes he wonders if he looks as awestruck about it as he feels, watching her put on this masterclass with everyone she talks to—from passing, brief conversations about how good Hannah’s food is and how old Reid is getting, to the long, sit-down chats about work and her life and their lives. It’s so crystal clear that she makes everyone feel important—the most important person in the room—and he;s even starting to remember names. 

There’s a lot of names to remember. 

There’s nobody that feels quite as important to Chris as Charles does, though, he’s sure of it. In fact, he’s not sure there’s another person on Earth that could manage to make a social event into something so… recharging for him. She just radiates energy, truly. It’s in the atmosphere, just being in her proximity, just having an arm around her or their fingers intertwined or the smell of her perfume on his clothes is enough. 

He loves her so horribly that he’s almost sick with it. He’s biting his tongue all night. Hell, he’s even trying to talk himself out of the now months old revelation. 

Like, she drinks wine from a fucking box. A box. Of wine. And she sees absolutely no problem with it. She wants to drag him around to every person, to engage in every conversation. She changed her perfume or her shampoo or her laundry detergent or something, because she smells different than the last time he was with her. She drives like an elderly woman—Jesus fucking Christ, she takes the speed limit so seriously it’s hard to sit in the passenger seat and let it happen. She cried three times on the way from Atlanta. Three times, because she saw some roadkill that wasn't even identifiable, and couldn’t stop thinking about it.  She’s covered in glitter, like, all the time. And so is her stuff. It’s on her face and her hands and her clothes and every surface of her house. Glitter and spelling tests and like, six variations of the same travel coffee mug. She listens to country music as if it’s the only genre of music that exists, and she listens to it all the time. He doesn’t love her. He doesn’t. If he did, he wouldn't have been able to keep it in for so long. 

He doesn’t love her, and then she laughs and he can feel it in his fucking gut, feels the urge to laugh even when he doesn’t get the joke, even when he misses entirely what is making her so happy. He wants to laugh because she’s laughing and her laugh makes the world a better place and he loves her so bad it hurts.

last chapter masterlist next chapter

[omegatheunknown]

F1 Affinity Grid, 2024

last year

Curiously, though the driver lineup is entirely unchanged from the end of last season, my whims continue to mutate.

Podium Places 1. Fernando Alonso (↑) -- Please, fickle fates, let Nando win a race before he rides off into the sunset. Self-identified villain or not, his undeniable pluck and wiliness persist and his character is now one of a 1 of 1 legend.

2. Alex Albon (↑) -- Williams remains a safe place for Alex, the car looks poor, his competition is below par, he just needs to gut out points and keep smiling. Bit concerned if a good run of form might put him in position to be put back in the fire at Red Bull, then again what if he ends up with George at Merc? Regardless, I want Alex to get everything he wants.

3. Lewis Hamilton (-) -- Well, he asked for this. LH is waiting for next year all year, but then again, aren't we all... I do, however, hope for a surprise breakthrough, even as he runs out his term for Merc.

4. Valtteri Bottas (↓) -- Clearly the mothballed Sauber operation gave him nothing to work with last year but I also struggle to remember even one instance of him outdriving the sled. The bright green car is fun, if unpromising. Bottas remains a fun personality and a surprise appearance in the top of the field would make me quite happy. 5. Yuki Tsunoda (↑) -- Make or break, Yuki lately looks like he'll make. Knowledge that he has to keep Danny Ric at bay looked to have done wonders for his focus over the back half of last season. A podium result would be delightful.

6. Oscar Piastri (↑) -- Oh, this kid's smooth. Pushed Lando as a rookie, which is not nothing.

7. Pierre Gasly (↓) -- Alpine was bad last year and looks... significantly worse this year. This, I'm afraid, will age Pierre and his youthful exuberance irrevocably.

8. Sergio Perez (↓) -- Aw, Checo. Terribly challenging year to try and root for the guy, he just... constantly failed to turn it up, rose to very few of the challenges thrown down... but he did finish 2nd, which, for all the grief, is the first time the bulls have finished 1-2, which I might suggest is indicative of the long term climate for their 2nd drivers.

Mid-field

9. Kevin Magnussen (↓) -- The kinder, gentler, mellower K-Mag continues to do what he do, which is qualify well and hope his Haas doesn't fucking die mid-race.

10. Zhou Guanyu (↓) -- Honestly, probably a better driver than Bottas at this point but it's hard to tell, think Valtteri's spent his spell with not-sauber trying to cope with a car that sucks to drive, whereas Zhou's been making do.

11. Nico Hulkenberg (↓) -- Copy and paste from K-Mag, still the best pair of drivers Haas has had (oh, that's a funny phrase) in ever, but to what end? Consistency in car not designed for race length races.

12. Esteban Ocon (↓) -- Did not, in the end, create much fun drama paired with Pierre, because it's easier to get along when there's little competition to be had. Could be a long quiet season.

13. Max Verstappen (↑) -- SuperMax continues his slow climb in my personal esteem (I'm sure he'd be thrilled to hear this,) he's just been so... consistent, and absent any challenge, sort of zen, reaching for a sort of pure mechanical athleticism mixed with unerring drive for further perfection. Gotta respect that. It's not the band I hate, it's the fans.

14. Charles LeClerc (↑) -- I don't want to feel bad for a rich, handsome Ferrari driver with the kind of life of leisure that allows the globe trotting Monegasque a vocation as a dilettante beat-maker... but his luck is so bad. So so bad.

15. Daniel Ricciardo (n/r) -- Oh, silly me. How could I forget. I have genuinely enjoyed Danny, he's the undisputed driver-side star of DtS. I just don't think he's... well, prove me wrong, Danny.

Backmarkers for my affection

16. Logan Sargeant (↓) -- Okay. Fair points -- he's green. Paired with Alex, he looks poor, Alex looks good. I do more or less hope he shows something this year, it's time to prove it.

17. Lando Norris (--) -- Still not really for me. He's maturing, he's putting up results. I just would not be surprised if Lando was a flat-earther or moon landing denier based on something he saw on tik-tok.

18. George Russell (--) -- I simply do not care for his demeanour.

19. Carlos Sainz, Jr (--) -- Do I feel bad that Lewis is taking his spot? No. No I do not. Feels cruel of me, but...

20. Lance Stroll (--) -- I will try to be nicer to Lance Stroll. Has he learned to check his mirrors before slamming into the side of or slamming his side into someone? Not as of yet.

[blushinggray]

pick your poison

itadori yuji x fem!reader | ryomen sukuna x fem!reader

mildly nsfw // cw: modern au (no jujutsu), bets, some sort of triangle(?), slightly/implied sexual content, intoxication (alcohol), mild cuckholding(?), yuji & sukuna are twins

okay tbh idek what this is, it was supposed to be sexy but it feels more like shenanigans. but whatever, i still kinda like it.

---

"nuh uh. no way. no way in hell."

"what's the matter? afraid she's gonna like me better?" sukuna sticks his tongue out between his smirk.

"shut up. fuck you. you're an asshole. and get out of my room." yuji jabs his finger harder into his brother's chest like he has to physically punctuate his sentences. because clearly this jackass won't get the idea otherwise.

he is not letting his irritating, arrogant, pretentious, playboy jerk of a brother get his grubby hands anywhere near you.

"oh, come on." the dickwad rolls his eyes, "she already kissed me once and didn't even know the difference."

"because she was drunk!" yuji throws his hands up in exasperation, "why the hell do you want her so bad anyway? you literally sleep with a new girl every week!"

sukuna leans against yuji's bedroom doorframe with a pensive look on his face, "i wonder... maybe she's just that good of a kisser that she made me change my mind."

the way the smirk returns to his asshole brother's face is all the confirmation yuji needs that he's just fucking around again. he really does not want or need to deal with this bullshit. because he can tell, at a glance, that sukuna isn't trying to get you because he's genuinely interested in you. it's because you're his.

sukuna has always been trying and getting the upper hand since they were little. whenever yuji had or did something that sukuna didn't, his brother would either take it or do something that made himself look better. and for a long time, yuji had a bit of a complex about that.

that even though they're identical twins, their similarities stop at their faces, because sukuna was just always naturally better -- or managed to easily get better -- than him in most ways. he was faster, stronger, taller, smarter, more popular, more charming, more everything. and for the longest time, he had no way to prove himself as someone other than the inferior version of sukuna.

but then he met you. you, who taught him that he didn't need to prove himself to be anything in comparison to his brother. you, who met both him and sukuna but still chose to get close to him. you, who he developed a real connection with before he finally got the guts to ask you out. you, who has been his rock and his roller coaster and his spice and his comfort for what feels like forever now.

there is no way in hell that yuji is going to let sukuna mess with you just to fuck with him. it's already enough that sukuna has twice as much going on as yuji does. he is not going to let that fucker have you, too.

sure, it was true that you accidentally kissed his brother at a party you were all at. yuji can understand the mistake because you do get pretty loopy after a few drinks and start to lose your... precision. plus, apparently you had walked up to sukuna and kissed him because you thought he was yuji in the first place, until you pulled away and saw the tattoos more clearly on his face.

yuji understood all that because you immediately pulled away and ran to find him and tell him what happened. he can trust you and your apology.

however, he cannot trust his conniving, smirking brother who is always trying to one up him. also, that asshole clearly spends too much time looking you over when he opens the door for you at home. so when sukuna comes to yuji's room to propose an "experiment" where he pretends to be yuji while you're drunk just to see if you'll notice, he is more than ready to send him flying and become an only child.

"what? you don't think it'd be interesting?" sukuna is smirking again, "you like those social experiment documentaries and shit, don't you? it's pretty much the same concept."

"do you think we're both stupid or something?" yuji's eyes and mouth are agape, "even if she was drunk, she wouldn't be blind. or deaf. you still have tattoos all over your body and a different voice than me??"

"you don't think i can act or sound like you?" sukuna looks amused before standing up and slipping his hands into his sweatpants pockets, relaxing his shoulders until they're almost slumped, and looking upwards with a bit of a ditzy, airy expression on, "man... wonder when fushigoro's gonna return my dvd? i wanna rewatch the saw series this weekend. oh! or maybe the conjuring series! ohh! or maybe--"

yuji can feel his eye twitch as he watches his brother switch between more expressions within the same minute than he's seem him do in an entire week before. what really irritates him is that sukuna actually does kind of sound like him... and if you took away the tattoos, and put an actual shirt on, and messed up his hair a bit... he might actually pass as yuji... because if he raises the pitch in his voice, he does start to even sound like him...

but no! no! this isn't some sort of impressions contest, he is not letting sukuna trick you into thinking he's yuji for a date! it's the principle of the thing!

"tell you what." sukuna changes gears, "you've been wanting a car, haven't you?"

"yeah..." yuji furrows his brows. he's been saving up for one for a while, because there are just so many more date possibilities when he and you aren't limited by train accessibility and schedule. but he's barely even halfway there because of his spontaneous spending habits...

"i'll give you mine, then." sukuna says.

"what."

"i've been thinking about getting a new one anyway, so i was gonna sell it first. but..." sukuna's smirk returns, "if you care to make a wager, then you can have it. no questions asked."

"you have got to be joking." yuji deadpans.

"i'm serious." sukuna says, "you let me take your place on your next little date night once your little girlfriend is tipsy enough. and from there, you let me do whatever i want. no interfering."

"you fucking asshole, i knew you were just trying to--"

"if," sukuna interrupts him with a finger, "she figures it out and before the date is over, then the car's yours."

yuji pauses, finally contemplating it. because it sounds too easy. there's no way that his brother would just give something to yuji that easily...

"but if she doesn't realize it isn't you 'til the very end," he continues, eyes starting to glint, "then you can't stop whatever goes down between us."

"uhm. what the fuck."

"you'll still get the car. but only if there are no interruptions." his smirk is downright demonic at this point.

yuji's brow furrow again in horror, not just because of how outrageous this wager is, but also because of how arrogantly confident his brother seems...

it sounds like a deal that's too good to be true, but... is it, really? he trusts you more than anyone, and he's positive that you would figure it out. like, there is no way that you would spend the entire date with sukuna thinking it was yuji, would you...?

...

well it looks like he's going to find out, because you come over to the house a few days later for a movie marathon night in. yuji tells you that he and you have the house to yourselves and spends most of the first movie refilling your cup. he cuddles with you under a blanket and eats the popcorn that you feed him and shares kisses with you at random times throughout the film.

all of the flirting intensifies as your buzz grows and makes you drunker, and yuji takes it all in stride and returns, like he normally does. but the more he does it, the more his heart pangs at the thought of letting his asshole brother, who doesn't deserve any of your love or affection, have this.

he can only hope that you'll be able to see through sukuna's surprisingly impressive act and call him out before the night ends. you're fairly drunk by the time he sets up the second movie, and when he goes off to "make more popcorn," that's when sukuna shows up to take yuji's hoodie right off his back ("i gotta smell the part too, brat") with the popcorn back to take his spot next to you on the couch.

he had somehow covered up all his tattoos, left his hair unstyled, and he's wearing the same sweatpants that yuji's currently wearing already. from a glance, even in a well lit room, it'd be harder to tell the two of them apart now. especially if they weren't standing beside each other.

yuji sneaks around the doors to listen from the hall, from the other side of the wall behind the couch. already, he can hear your drunk giggling and the rustling sound of you probably burrowing yourself deeper into the blanket and closer to sukuna.

he stays there for a solid hour, just listening to anything that develops outside of the movie playing. you do talk a bit between scenes, and sukuna actually ends up responding with things that yuji might actually say... which is kind of creepy.

but more than that, have you seriously not picked up on the fact that isn't not him in there??? you've gotten through half of the movie by now and you still haven't noticed??? granted, sukuna's acting is like, way better than he thought to give him credit for, but to be honest, he's getting a little worried now...

not because of the car or anything like that, but if you really don't notice, then how far is sukuna going to go? he wouldn't put it past his slut of a brother to touch you, but... if he did anything beyond that, yuji made a deal to not interfere. but will he really be able to keep himself from interfering?

the longer he stays here, the less likely it seems. because he can already hear some longer, drawn out kissing sounds coming from the living room.

fuck, he wants to cover his ears. or maybe he should just leave the room. leave the house, even. he doesn't know if he can handle more than this. you're his, for god's sake. the one thing in his life that he holds dear and can't be taken away by his brother. and now...

now...

"mmh..." you let out a sweet moan.

yuji sneaks over to the other end of the hall -- he can't help it -- hiding behind a tall plant where he can peek through the thick, large leaves to see what's happening on the couch.

and fuck-- you're practically lying on him! fuck, fuck-- he should've known. there's a subtle but intimate sex scene happening in the movie too, so of course sukuna would take an opening like that to turn it up.

you let out a gasp when you pull away from his brother, smiling up at him with hazy eyes and a drunk giggle. and sukuna -- the bastard -- gives you an affectionate chuckle and kiss before dragging your leg over his lap to straddle him.

fuck fuuuuuucckkk!! should he go in there? your clothes are still on and it doesn't look or sound like sukuna has gone beyond kissing and touching you through your clothes just yet, but yuji really feels the need to stomp in there, yank you off of his brother, and try to kiss some sense back into you. because have you really still not realized that it's not him in there?

"ugh-- ugh! yuji..." you moan again, and fuck-- now he's got other problems to worry about.

he can't help it! because even though you're probably drunk out of your mind and deceived by his brother's act, you still think it's yuji. and you're still reciprocating thinking that it's him. feeling pleasure because you think you're with him. not sukuna.

shit, now his small problem is becoming a semi-problem. not good, not good. the little sounds and whines you make aren't doing much to help either.

looking through the plant leaves, he can see sukuna's bastard hands up your shirt, clearly moving in a way that means he's groping at your breasts under there. yuji has no idea how his brother fucks -- and he still doesn't want to know -- but he didn't expect him to so affectionate.

even as you start rolling your body into his hands and hips, sukuna's mouth is all over you. he kisses your lips, your jaw, your shoulder, and -- what seems to be his favorite -- your neck. he latches onto the side of your throat like he has to melt you with the heat from his own tongue.

yuji wants to hate this so bad, watching his own brother kissing up on his girl. but you're sighing in bliss, and your head is hanging back, your eyes are closed, and you're still calling out his name in little whispers.

"yuji... ah, yuji..."

fuck, if he was in there right now, he'd be so gone. he wants you so much. what he'd give to just be back on that couch with you right now... not dealing with this stupid bet he made.

but it's sukuna on that couch right now, sukuna is underneath you and touching you and kissing you and--

"here. let me."

that motherfucker! he's taking off your shirt!!! and-- and you don't have a bra on tonight. fuck. no... if he has to watch his own twin brother suck on your tits. ugh no, that just might be the thing that makes him break.

he can't do it. he can't just sit here and let this happen in front of his own eyes anymore. he just can't--

"yuji?" your voice calls out, a little breathless but still sounding like an actual question, "you're not gonna stop me?"

the blood freezes in yuji's body, as he looks directly at you from behind the plant. did you-- did you see him? and wait, what did you just say?

"hm? whaddaya mean?" sukuna asks in his yuji voice as he continues to graze along your neck.

"yuji. are you really just gonna let me fuck your brother like this...?" you breathe out.

what?

"what?" sukuna asks, still in his yuji voice.

"yujiii..." you whine, very clearly not addressing the man beneath you anymore. "baby, i'm so wet right now. if you really don't come get me, i really might just do it with your brother."

yuji bolts into the room faster than lightning could catch up to him, "y-you knew?"

you perk up immediately, pulling your hands away from sukuna's shoulder to hold them out to yuji instead. you rise onto your knees to meet him in an enthusiastic kiss, even with sukuna still trapped underneath your legs.

you let out a little giggle when you let go, "i mean, i'm drunk so it took me a minute to be sure." you turn to sukuna to run your fingers through his hair in a thoughtful gesture, "you really did sound like yuji for a while... but it was pretty obvious once you kept going for my boobs instead of my ass."

okay... that's-- that's fair. yuji is an ass guy through and through. he has never made it through sex or even just a regular day seeing you without putting his hands or his head on your ass. if he could sleep on your ass instead of a pillow, he would.

but to think that that was how you realized it wasn't yuji... you really do know him well. but in the most unexpected ways...

"you really know me, huh." yuji can't help but laugh. finally, he feels like he can take a breath after such a tense night. a smiley kiss from you is the cherry on top.

"alright, lovebirds. this is sweet and all, but i'm not into being the cuck. so move it, sweetie." sukuna pats your hip as a signal for you to move off of him.

but before you do, you ask, "why did you do all this anyway?" you rub a thumb along his cheek, "the makeup, acting like yuji, being all sweet and stuff. did you really wanna live as your brother for a night?"

"as if." sukuna rolls his eyes, lifting you by the hips himself to set you aside, "it was a bet, and he already won, since you found out."

"a bet?" you turn to yuji with a confused look, "you did all this to make a bet? what the heck was so important that you let me make out with your brother for ten minutes?"

"uhhhhh... i'll tell you later." yuji chuckles, rubbing the back of his neck.

you're making a face that tells him that you still want answers, but for now, you want for sukuna to leave the room. yuji is about to join you on the couch again, or maybe get on his knees to apologize, when--

"oi. yuji."

he looks up at his brother, who pauses by the living room doorway. he's facing the hall, and not looking at yuji or you, but there's a strangely contemplative look on his face. a serious expression that he doesn't see all that often from his lackadaisical brother.

then sukuna turns his head to glance briefly between the two of you, before turning away again, "take good care of her."

yuji exchanges a confused look with you before calling after his brother, "i'd do that whether or not you tell me to, jerk!"

but always one to have the last word, sukuna glances down at yuji on his way up the stairs to his room, with the most ominous, sinister smirk yet, "good. you wouldn't want anyone to take her from you now, would you?"

was that a threat? is that asshole seriously going to try going for you now? there's no way that dumb playboy would go that far... right?

"yuji?" you bring his attention back.

"sorry. that must've been really weird, i know." he finally sits down beside you, "but i swear i did it for a reason! hopefully a good reason..."

"hmm... well explain it to me in a bit." you say as you climb into his lap, mirroring the position sukuna had just had you in. you bring his hand into your loose shorts, where he can feel-- oop. "i told you, didn't i? how wet i am... i really was this close to letting him fuck me."

well, shit. he can't have that. it looks like he'll just have to fuck any thoughts of his asshole brother out of your head himself.

-- fin --

(tbc?)