#i just cant sometimes
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I'm so close to isolating myself rn.
#vent post#im sorry i seem to always feel like shit everyone#im so so sorry you guys have to read this stuff#i just cant sometimes#my mental health is in the gutter and i barely have long lasting ways to help me copr#and even when one DOES start working it dies out so fast#im sorry#i love you all so much#im sorry all of you know a failure like me
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BTW... PSA.... even if we arent mutuals if youre in my notes regularly theres a Very high chance i am still fond of you. yes im vaguing someones tags on the compliment the person u rbed this from post. but like. positive vaguing? THE POINT IS im weird abt following ppl but IM STILL SENDING U FOND VIBES...
#i have to acclimate myself into following people. first i have to spend a few days to weeks checking someones blog manually#and i cant follow too many new people in the same burst or else theres TOO MUCH new unfamiliarity on my dash#and i become a small and easily frightened beast alarmed by change#also im just....................... incredibly picky kjhsdkjjkdsj sometimes ppl i generally am :)! towards do occasionally rb#from someone who i want to throw bricks at. and then i cant follow them but im still :)! when i see them in notifs#and sometimes its just that im going AAAA!!! AAAA!!! and cant put more new things on my dash#or in some cases its someone im fond of seeing/chatting w whenever we have talked BUT they simply are also into stuff im not rly into#and i dont want it on my dash despite liking them as a person. etc. you know how it is#ALL OF WHICH TO SAY................... :)!#rimi talks
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truth serum / system reveal au where shen qingqiu gets hit with an uncloaking spell that reveals the system in the reflection of his eyes every time it pops up.
during one of his missions, in the treasure hoard of some dragon-like creature, he finds a golden, oval shaped hand mirror, its gaudy style more victorian based than anything (airplane you hack!), that doesn't seem to do anything when he looks into it. but when he does, it reveals the system's screen in his eyes.
he doesn't notice this, of course, because he can't see it, and the system, surprisingly, stays quiet.
the peak lords think he's cursed.
maybe mu qingfang is the first to notice, during the mandatory post mission check-up, when shen qingqiu is scrolling through his most recently accumulated points and mu qingfang can see the strange vividly-blue lines reflected in his pupils. it's gone when shen qingqiu blinks, like it was nothing but a trick of the light.
it comes out when yue qingyuan is visiting and, just as he's done laying out the plans for a new mission, shen qingqiu's eyes glaze over and a bright blue box takes over the whole of his iris. shen qingqiu goes quiet; the thing in his eyes moves, shifts, pulses for a second, like static worms crawling all over his pupils. then he blinks, and it's gone, and shen qingqiu accepts the mission that yue qingyuan was almost sure he would decline.
maybe there is an intervention, when the peak lords corner shen qingqiu at qian cao peak and try to figure out what's wrong, subjecting him to all kinds of treatments and curse-finding spells that turn up empty, they can't find anything.
of course, the silencing threat is still very much up and running. at first shen qingqiu was kind of confused by the whole ordeal, but when the peak lords start describing a "strange blue box", he realizes, with sickening suddenty, that they're describing the system. and he can't say anything.
this only makes everything worse, because their fellow peak lord now keeps evading every question and acts like he doesn't understand. liu qingge points right at his face and asks, "that blue box, what is it?" and shen qingqiu laughs nervously and starts talking about how bright the weather is and surely it's the sky and nothing to worry about!
even worse, during the intervention the system thought it was a good idea to start talking to him, so now even the peak lords who hadn't seen it and who might have been persuaded by light tricks and reflections, get a first row view that no, that definitely isn't a trick of the light.
they try to do the whole thing of "are you in danger, blink twice" but shen qingqiu can't even do that because it's still a direct admittance!
maybe eventually he starts saying vague confirmations that don't actually confirm anything, like "this master hears what you're saying", or maybe he goes with a classic "this master can neither confirm nor deny that." but the system starts warning him for that too and eventually he stops saying anything, which worries the others more.
luckily mu qingfang catches on that every time they ask a direct question about the box or shen qingqiu says anything vaguely confirming, it appears. it doesn't appear when they ask about curses or demons, so it must not see that as a threat.
for a little extra angst: maybe the peak lords keep pressuring him for answers, and at some point shen qingqiu gets fed up and snaps out something like, "why don't you understand that i'm not allowed to answer that!" the system counts this as a direct admittance, threatening it's existence. so it punishes. shen qingqiu has a qi deviation so bad it lasts two weeks and takes two people every day to cleanse his meridians. the system doesn't appear in that time. it doesn't appear for a long while after that, either. the peak lords stop asking, mainly because shen qingqiu will instantly leave the room if they do. they don't stop searching for a cure, though.
shang qinghua returns from a business trip and catches on the second someone mentions a blue box and forced silencing.
#i like the idea of sqq sort of disassociating every time he talks with the system#like his eyes go unfocused and he goes quiet and doesnt seem to hear what others are saying#and the others always thought that was odd but hey. whatever. until some strange *thing* started showing up#i do also like the idea of the system slowly allowing sqq more liberties#bc its decided it likes this storyline#liu qingge comes to cleanse sqqs meridians and gets red with anger when the system pops up in sqqs eyes#but then sqq reaches out to him and says ''no. it... likes you.''#the system doesnt (cant) really like anyone. but its gifting him friendship points when liu qingge visits him and that's positive?#liu qingge doesnt see it as positive and gets even more mad because what do you MEAN this monster enitity ''likes him''????#liu qingge is going to kill it the first chance he has!!#yue qingyuan talks about a mission looking for volunteers and you can *see* his face fall when the blue box appears#''it wants you to go. doesn't it?'' ''this shidi would like to join this mission.'' ''i understand.''#sometimes the blue box appears and sqq looks *stricken*. like he just saw something really awful#but he just cant talk about it#svsss#scum villain's self saving system#scum villain#shen qingqiu#yue qingyuan#mu qingfang#system svsss#svsss au#reveal au
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sry i have chronic only draws megumi disorder the doctor said it's terminal :/
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#fushiguro megumi#megumi fushiguro#fanart#jjk fanart#megumi#me: 'i like yuuji and megumi Equally :)' also me:#i cant help it hes so fun to draW hes so easy to draw i love you i love you i love youuuuuu#also this is kiiind of me making good on that poll i did forever ago saying id draw catboys . so as promised here is A Catboy :3#hes sooooo meowmeow hes so gd CUTE god i love . fushiguro mEGUMI#to b fair i Do like yuuji and megu equally ffgsdjfdjh#sometimes u just gotta spend the whole entire day fully rendering what was supposed to be a megu sketch sheet#but now it is . just a char sheet by talos this cant keep happening#this all started bc i still want to practice/tweak the way i draw faces but it would appear i cannot control myself#also been loving drawing the cat megumi plush gddff fushiguro mewgumi is my favourite animal crossing villager#anyway so much for working on speed this was a fun 10 hours#its ok . i do it fr him <3 geto voice i dont mind being killed by you
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thinking about sten again. thinking about him calling the warden kadan and never explaining what it means. thinking about him offering to take the warden back with him to par vollen, but it's never actually an option the warden takes, even if you agree. thinking about how sten responds the best to a warden who stands their ground even if he doesn't agree with them. thinking about how he loves sweets and art, and how he plays with kittens. "it's training," he says. but come on. he's playing. thinking about what else he's had to justify to himself for liking.
and he calls alistair kadan! shale as well! do you think it was ever extended to the other party members? just,, agh
#dao#dragon age#dragon age origins#sten#sten of the beresaad#clearly having a normal one#also leliana and sten is such an underrated friendship. i do think it'd be kind of difficult for them to get along at first m#(leliana being so devout and sten being so dedicated to the qun) but they get there#they were both in lothering together. i wonder if they talk about it sometimes#also the whole “the warden cant actually go to par vollen” thing makes me feel SICK with a mage warden. because its an offer that has no#good ending. it was an offer made where both parties already know that it cant happen but it is an offer made regardless#bioware you bastard let me romance sten#just once#cmonn
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...
#i cant take this anymore#ffxiv#y'shtola rhul#erenville#meteor finalfantasy#erenville x wol#ppl keep asking me what meteor did. my answer is idk.#sometimes u just want to shake
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Obviously the ability to turn off anonymous asks is very useful and highly popular, but if tumblr had the option to disallow people sending asks under their blog name and accept only anonymous asks, do you think this feature would be useful to anyone at all? (like, not necessarily you in specific, just, do you think it would be a remotely popular choice with any sort of group on tumblr in general)
turning on "harassment only" mode and going to sleep
#serious answer: not like useful but def funny#id probably enable it sometimes just cause#but like i cant think of much of an actual usecase
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discowing + jaybin ! press for quality
txtless + ref under the cut
ignore my horrible art please i drew this on ibis paint x with my finger and the soft felt tip pen brush. and my crappy penmanship.
#discowing isnt actually that bad guys i swear in this essay i will-#isn’t the discowing suit mainly dark blue? no#thats actually a commen phenomenon in comics#because comics#especially older ones#tend to use blue as highlights for black#and oftentimes that leads readers into mistaking the black for blue#common examples of this are in the discowing suit#in batman’s cape#and in spider-man’s outfit#sometimes like with the discowing suit or the spider-man suit#so many people think that it’s blue that it just starts to be drawn and portrayed as blue#thank you for reading my yap session#if u did#dc#dc comics#batman#nightwing#robin#dick grayson#jason todd#discowing#jaybin#NOT A SHIP btw#please dont tag as ship#its not#i cant believe i have to say that
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super normal normal and well adjusted!! :)
#my art#doombop!#daycare attendant sun#dca fandom#sun fnaf#i eat up au designs but sadly For The Plot these bots are original quality. aside from their eyes somewhat (sometimes) being able to squish-#and squint#. the downfall of the perspective of the story. is i cant include every time Sun's inner dialog is just “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-”
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silly comic based on a time i struggled to read live on stream :thumbsup:
context clip compilation below ASDASDFASA
(cw for brief mention of hospitals/strokes)
#in stars and time#isat#isat odile#isat siffrin#isat spoilers#<- not big ones but the convo this stems from occurs on 3rd floor before king act 2 so#cw hospital#cw stroke#<- brief stroke talk in the clip thats why#odile i am so sorry for making u deal with the fact that i cant read#or just input words?? where there arent any??? i dont know why i do that????#these streams have made me realize i sometimes just autofill words when reading SAFADDA#also random side headcanon i was thinking of while drawing this#is odile speaks alot with her hands?#idk why i just think its fun?#and kinda makes sense as someone who has travelled a lot thru different countries?#personal observation but you can convey/tell a lot without knowing a much of a different language via body language#as someone who grew up with family who spoke a different language that i do not speak LMAO#especially hands!! those say a lot!!#reading body langauge/tone helped me a lot when guessing if what was being talked about a good thing or not#tho tone to a lesser extent since uh it can be hard to tell at times i think ASDFDA#so it makes sense to me???#the art of pointing in general location is a universal skill i think?? yea#to a lesser extent i think siffrin might do this? but more subdued/under the cloak so#the cloak ends up getting in the way 90% of the time so no one can actually see that lmao#okay tag talk over#no stream time today because weather boooooo storms
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small comforts☀️
#*horrific puking noises*#i cant STAND THEM#i love them so much they own my heart and soul i cant take it sOMEBODY SEDATE ME#shes ok in that bottom doodle btw he’s just aggressive with affection and grooming sometimes ok shes used to it#godzilla#mothra#kaiju#mosugoji#mothzilla#my art
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Some Papas (including a Papa Secondo) and a Cardinal
#the band ghost#papa emeritus ii#papa emeritus iii#papa emeritus iv#cardinal copia#popia#ghost#secondo#terzo#terzo is having a spa day#if this wont show up again on your feed ill just cry#oh my god it WORKED I cant believe it#tumblr sometimes i just want to kick you#you guys voted so ill just post a few sketches accordingly!#cardi and popia and terzo were the leading votes and i added papa secondo as a bonus
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Usopp said “I want a divorce!” and Luffy said “Fine! But I’m taking the kids!” and the kids were three teens older than him, a reindeer, and a 30 year old woman who was actively committing a political assassination
#like yeah sometimes your kids are three teens older than both yourself and your spouse a reindeer and a 30 year old woman who was actively c#one piece#water 7#you thought i was done with the usopp brainrot but no i was just on vacation#Elbaf cant come any sooner im chewing on the drywall and thinking about water 7#water seveeeeeen#I’m gonna have to go read fanfiction abt this#lusopp#strawhat pirates#monkey d. luffy#god usopp#my post
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im with fam but i always thinka him so doodle time
#xmen#xmen comics#erik lehnsherr#magneto#snap sketches#'hey guys i wont have time for doodle posting for a bit' me when i lie fCKJWRBKH#i actually dont likr this too much but im posting just so i can ramble bout erik fjKJCNWKDCHJ#I dont think its bad just not really post worthy#i draw this mfer sleepy so much thatswhy i dont like this#i usually just hoard doodles like these since they dont feel super share worthy to me but i repeat#i just want an excuse to talk about erik and i wanted a homegrown visual#anyway. i have wine in me im being bold <- its not that bold#sometimes i look at how the black lines on krakoa eriks design put focus on his. //coughs// front#and i get lightheaded like mfer if you do not want me to stare do not put a literal box in front of my EYES#ok thats literally it. i wanna try to doodle something ill be Happy happy to share but lbr i cant muster anything anymore tonight#so for now bye bye hope everyone had a good day today !!#im gonna go draw erik indecent maybe ill feel better then
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distractions ✨
#for all the shooting range fics and what not#i was gonna make Leon’s face angry but i also think its cute that Luis cant see Leons soft expression#just hears the grumpy voice#i once again struggled with luis’ face… its hit or miss for me sometimes#not safe gun practices so don’t do it lol#serennedy#leon kennedy#leon s kennedy#luis serra#luis serra navarro#resident evil#resident evil 4#resident evil 4 remake#resident evil fanart#serennedy fanart
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zhongli and neuvillette fighting over their reader 🤭🤭
scary dog privilege wherever you go, draconic courting gestures that would scare any regular person, they send each other deadly glares the moment you turn away,
stealing your clothes to just get a whiff of your scent, marking their territory all over your house - making it a battlefield basically, neuvillette (in my hc) is cooler and zhongli is warm so the cuddles are always so comfy ☺️😍,
they give you anything you want - you don't even have to lift a finger, they make you travel between the nations a lot though 😒 sooo clingyyy, extra gentle in their dragon forms as to not squish you, don't even get me started on the size difference 😍😍
just a little thought 🤭☺️
- 🐈⬛
Neuvi being colder is so real and canon. I see him as being colder + a lot more lithe, kinda lanky with smaller but sharper canines versus Zhongli who's warmer and a bit shorter then Neuvi + bulkier with bigger but not as sharp canines.
They've also got very different habits – Zhongli is very prideful not just of himself but his nation. He'll personally give your a tour and purposely drag it out as long as he can. Complimenting Liyue is basically complimenting him, checkmate Neuvi. Especially if he convinces you to try on some local Liyue fashion. Harmless and just a nice gift to anyone else but Neuvi sees it for what it is (since your wearing something from Liyue, technically wearing something of his. He loves his technicalities when it comes to staking a claim over you). Adds salt to the wound by touching you in totally innocent ways like to adjust you towards something he wants to show you or accidently brushing against you when he takes the bags of spoils he's practically drowning you in but really he's just making sure his scent sticks. He's just a sweet, nice gentleman with absolutely no ulterior motives trust.
Neuvillette does love Fontaine, but his habits are more about himself then the nation. He'll take you around if you ask or if the idea strikes him, but you'll probably stay around the making city area or the opera house specifically. He enjoys more personal time with just you and him then anything else. He values the immaterial to the material. Zhongli spoils you with gifts, but Neuvi tries to offer quality time irregardless of physical gifts (though he still gives them just not to the extent of Zhongli). He'll take you to see different operas if that's to your fancy, or leverage a bit of his authority to maybe see a few films since those seem to be hitting off in Fontaine recently. Bet that creaky old archon doesn't have those huh. He feels awkward if you want to watch a trial, but he'll reluctantly agree because. well. it's you. just don't wave or anything he's trying to work and he just Really wants to see you smile at him like that again and it makes him lose his train of thought. gets custom clothes designed by Chiori to replace your clothes from Liyue because they smell of Zhongli and it makes him sulky + he likes to match.
G-d forbid these two are in the same room as you because it's a war of attrition at that point. Constant accidental brush of the hand against your shoulder or elbow but it's just them trying to get rid of the others scent. they are side eyeing each other behind your back while being all smiles whenever your looking. If it's hot and you lean into Neuvi more he's practically GLOWING. not even smug he's just absolutely smitten and happy to be of service. immediately takes off his gloves and presses his hands to your face asking if your okay and if you want to go back with him. if it's cold out and you seek out Zhongli more hes smug as hell beneath the calm veneer. Offers you his coat and stay as physically close to you as he can under the pretense of being worried you'll catch a cold if he doesn't warm you up.
don't even get me started on your house either because you probably have tons of gifts from both of them accumulated everywhere. if Neuvi sees you use a tea set from Zhongli suddenly he had a fantastic gift idea he thought you'd like. he even got some tea included with it so why don't you let him make you some? Zhongli sees you using a goblet Neuvi gave you (totally a coincidence it's similar to his) and suddenly you have 27 square cups in your cabinets that you have no idea where they came from. if the goblet is mysteriously missing oh well. who knows :]
#sagau#genshin sagau#self aware genshin#asks#genshin impact sagau#self aware genshin impact#genshin cult au#genshin impact cult au#is this actually cult au?? csnt tell tagging it anyway#its like 1 am brain not working#🐈⬛ anon#shaking them both like shaker charms#zl feels more possessive too. neuvi is possessive but i dont think snyone could get near zl level of possessiveness#its like having two cats constantly trying to get your attention.#neuvi is more mellow imo so hes not as intense in the rivalry but sometimes he feels PETTY#only if it actually benefits you though because you still come first even if he cant stand zl snd hes not dragging you into it#zl has no issue tossing out gifts neuvi gives you unless your REALLY attached to it but neuvi probably wouldnt yknow..#sometimes neuvi is just clueless he did not gaf abt zl at first he was just smitten with you. he did not want 2 get involved in this rivalry#but hes still a little possessive snd having you come back smelling like zl dressed in clothes from liyue with other gifts from zl..#it rained for like a week straight he was in shambles. acted like a kicked puppy until zl scent was gone 😭#also theres a joke somewhere here abt zl snd his square cups..hm.#just clingy possessive dragons trying to subtly be the only one you pay attention to 🫡#this has been my loser girlfail neuvi propaganda post enjoy
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