#ppl keep asking me what meteor did. my answer is idk.

[deathflare]

...

[littlehungrywarrior]

there’s a lot of things about me that are fucking absurd and really cool, so when ppl ask me to tell them about myself, i break em out immediately (”my family heirloom is a severed head named oswald,” “I can see disney studios from my house,” etc) 

but just bc im bored and I feel like it, here’s some stuff about me that I dont think I’ve ever really talked about? not secrets, but just...mundane things that I don’t really ever say in favor of Ice Breaker™-type things 

I have a profound respect for mail services. When I was 7-8 years old, we watched a documentary in class about how the postal system works, its history, and about the various jobs involved. It was an extremely formative experience for me. I don’t send a lot of things over snailmail and so I’m not really sure how to express my respect and support but it’s definitely there. Unfortunately, I’ve yet to play the FallOut game where you’re a mail carrier, but I wanna... I wanna. 

Though I’ll claim to the ends of the earth that sports confuse me, I am a huge speed-running enthusiast. One hobby/interest/self-esteem exercise I have is that I really like to learn jargon/lingo involved with...anything, really. So I started watching speedruns to pick up the lingo and I just...became infatuated. I’m no expert but I’m %100 into it for more than the lingo at this point; I’ve long since got that covered. One of my favorite parts is golf-clapping along with other fans when something cool/impressive happens. 

I can’t sleep without a hat on. A beanie, specifically. When I was, like...5 or something, I was terrified of vampires, and for some reason I thought vampires bit the skull and not the neck. So I pulled my blankets up over my head at night. My parents thought this was dangerous (I might suffocate) so they gave me a hat to protect myself with. I’ve long since outgrown my fear of vampires (and learnt that they don’t typically bite skulls) but I’ve associated hats with nighttime safety for so long that I can’t fall asleep without one. In the event that I don’t have one, I can wear underwear on my head to suffice...and I think I wore a stuffed animal once somehow but idk. 

I’ve had my SPiN in genetics for so long that 5-year-old me used to infodump strangers at the grocery store. When I asked where babies come from, my dad got me a picture book written for kids specifically to answer that question. We still have it; my brothers used it, too. It starts by explaining pollination and then extends the same concepts to dogs and then humans. Most of the information is on pregnancy and fetuses rather than sex, and cell development immediately caught my fascination. I asked my parents for more information about this and they gave me some more microbiology stuff. Combine that with my animal obsession + budding interest in heredity and you’ve got a tiny obnoxious geneticist who wouldn’t stop telling random people in line at the grocery store about how chromosomes are passed on through haploid cells. Dad got real smug about it, it was fantastic. 

On a similar note (and I have no memory of how this actually happened), I more or less learnt to read spontaneously? All at once? Again, I have no clear memory of this until the part where I can read... My parents read to me every night but I never was able to do it myself. I had a huge library built into the wall at perfect me-height for reading. One morning, the summer I turned 5, I (according to legend) walked up to my parents, got their attention, said “I’m going to read now,” and then (this part I do remember) sat down and read every single book in that library over the course of two or three days. Super rough estimate, but it was somewhere between 70-200 books, with a variety of target ages ranging from 3 to 10-11. No chapter books, all pictures, but the second I was finished I wanted more books. My mom took me to the store to buy more and insisted I get a chapter book since I’d burnt through the picture books so fast. And that’s where I got my first Warriors book. 

That was not the last time I read an entire library. In 7th grade, a friend of mine and I both had sex ed previously and so were allowed to skip that year’s sex ed on the condition that we spent that class in the school library. And together, we read the entire thing. Only what was on the shelves, though; nothing in the back. Actually, at one point on the last day, we’d already read every book in the place and we were bored, so we pulled some books out of the back to look at and none of them caught our interest. One of them was the first Hunger Games book WAY before it got popular. We’d never heard of it, both read the first 2 pages, didn’t like it at all, and put it back. You should’ve seen our faces when it suddenly blew up into a huge thing. The sad thing is, I remember a lot of books that I enjoyed but can’t find now because I can’t remember any specific titles or characters. We sped through everything to finish it all and didn’t really take a lot of time to absorb details so a lot of them are lost to the vague, hazy back of my memory. Still looking for that manga where the ninja kid...stops an evil scientist from...some kind of virtual world machine. There’s a piranha tank? And then the bad guy...gets sniped by a helicopter and falls off the roof, or something? Also there was a manga version of Maximum Ride, which I only remember by name because 2 chapters in it suddenly hit me that this was a comic version of a text-novel my mom was reading at the same time. I bought a handful of books from that library at the end of the year and still have them. 

I’ve only been in one play but something fucking sweet happened during production. I was Malvolio in Twelfth Night because, and I quote my drama teacher (who had known me for 8-ish years at that point and also who was smirking her ass off when she said this), “You’ll see why when you read the play.” She was not wrong and to this day that smug fuckin grin gives me life. Anyway, I was Malvolio, and you know that “Some have greatness thrust upon them” speech that everyone’s so inspired by? That speech is a fucking prank pulled on this asshole and it’s about bangin’. So the scene is that I dramatically read this “””love letter””” I’ve received and then run off to go embarrass myself. The speech is LONG and so I asked if I can just...actually have it written on the letter. And she said yes! So I wrote it down with intent of reading it off the letter. But opening night, the actress who was to place the letter grabbed the wrong paper and so I got just a blank sheet. Guess fucking what? We’d re-choreographed that scene so many times the night before that I slammed that shit anyway, word-for-fucking-word. And I was never mad at my friend for grabbing the wrong paper, so I say this in jest, but her punishment for grabbing the wrong paper is that the entire cast/production team did not hear the end of my pride for the entire week. For a timeframe reference, I was 12. 

When I was a kid I had a horse named Emmy. She was a rental horse. Actually, I think she was a pony? The way the rental worked was that she lived in a barn with a bunch of other horses. Her owners were a small business who gave riding lessons, but instead of just riding each session, one of the horses was “yours” (assigned by age, height, and temperament, not picked by the kid) to take care of while you were there and ride consistently every session. Essentially, she was only my pet when I was on the property. I can still ride but I’ve gotten rusty and I can’t do anything above a trot for more than a few seconds. Both times I’ve jumped have been accidents, once on Emmy and once on mom’s current horse, Meteor. I’ve fallen only once, and it was off Emmy. Mom’s going to be getting a gigantic thoroughbred soon and I’m both terrified and excited to ride this very large boy. 

I talk about this in person but not online because...why would it ever come up online?? I have worn the same style of red jacket every single time I leave the house since I was a pre-teen. It’s to the point where people will only recognize me if I’m wearing it. I had a friend in high school who was/is a really cool guy, we were seniors and we’d been close friends since freshman year. I had my jacket tied around my waist because of the heat. The school had two campuses a block apart and I was walking from one to the other to get something. Friend was walking from the other to the one, so we passed each other. Wordlessly. No wave, nothing. I was tired, it was hot, I didn’t really think anything of it. Then suddenly, a foot behind me, he freezes dead in his tracks and says my name with some kind of stricken shock. He had no idea it was me. At all. Keep in mind: my jacket? Tied around my waist. Not even off, just around my waist. Since then I’ve used this jacket thing to my advantage. Sparingly, I can take it off to sneak around. It’s like I’m invisible to people I know unless I say something and they hear my voice. It’s incredible. 

Going back to speed running, way before I knew that it was a thing at all, I taught myself to speedrun two games: The Lion King (PS2, not the impossibly hard one) and Putt Putt Saves The Zoo. As they were unofficial speedruns that I didn’t really call anything and just kinda did when I was bored, I never timed the latter, and I only timed the former once using my mom’s kitchen timer. It was a rough estimate since sometimes I paused and forgot to hit play for a few seconds, or I needed to pause but didn’t for a few seconds, and the timer only counted full minutes anyway, but I still remember the time: 35 minutes. I keep meaning to go back and re-teach myself to speedrun it, perhaps more professionally, and time it with more accuracy. I still remember all the strats but I can’t pull them off with as much fluidity as I could when I was still in practice. I also can, when watching both Lion King 1 and 2, still point out with frame-perfect accuracy exactly when a scene starts that was a cutscene in that game. 

wow writing this was fun and I kinda wanna do it again. ok 

[cptsdofficial]

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 Ask me! I'll answer honestly jesus fucking hell here we go

1: How tall or short do you wish you were? tbh i’m pretty ok with my height maybe like one (1) inch taller2: What’s your dream pet? (Real or not) i want a sphynx cat shgdhg3: Do you have a favorite clothing style? i like all kinds of styles’ Aesthetic but mine is wearing the same ten t shirts over and over4: What was your favorite video game growing up? Ocarina of Time5: What three things/people do you think of most each day: Jacob, dying and going to sleep6: If you had a warning label, what would yours say? emotionally unstable7: What is your opinion on [insert person/thing here]? i Hate candy corn its Disgusting8: What is your Greek personality type? [Sanguine, Phlegmatic, Choleric, or Melancholic] melancholic have u seen my blog9: Are you ticklish? yea10: Are you allergic to anything? I’m allergic to Nut11: What’s your sexuality? people who give me attention12: Do you prefer tea, coffee, or cocoa? coffee13: Are you a cat or dog person? i like both but! probably more dog14: Would you rather be a vampire, elf, or merperson? vampire15: Do you have a favorite Youtuber? youtube is a sin16: How tall are you? 5′8?17: If you had to change your name, what would you change it to? i chose my name lol bye18: How much do you weigh? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!] too much lol19: Do you believe in ghosts/spirits? idk not really but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯20: Do you like space or the ocean more? space!21: Are you religious? no22: Pet peeves? being alive

23: Would you rather be nocturnal or diurnal [opposite of nocturnal]? nocturnal

24: Favorite constellation? don’t have one25: Favorite star? don’t have one26: Do you like ball-jointed dolls? no?27: Any phobias or fears? bugs28: Do you think global warming is real? who am i trump29: Do you believe in reincarnation? idk i don’t really Believe in it that much but i don’t believe against it30: Favorite movie? Totoro probably

31: Do you get scared easily? pretty much32: How many pets have you own in your lifetime? idk a few34: What is a color that calms you? green or purple35: Where would you like to travel and/or live? i wanna visit Japan36: Where were you born? Indiana37: What is your eye color? brown38: Introvert or extrovert? introvert39: Do you believe in horoscopes and zodiacs? not really but i still read them40: Hugs or kisses? neither lol

41: Who is someone you would like to see/visit right now? god42: Who is someone you love deeply? jacob43: Any piercings you want? no44: Do you like tattoos and piercings? on other people yeah, i kinda want tattoos45: Do you smoke or have you eiver done so? smoke what lol i’m kidding yeah46: Talk about your crush, if you have one! no47: What is a sound you really hate? me talking48: A sound you really love? cronch49: Can you do a backflip? who am i sportacus50: Can you do the splits? no51: Favorite actor and/or actress? Samira Wiley!52: Favorite movie? whys this on here twice bye53: How are you feeling right now? like i still have 120 questions to go54: What color would you like your hair to be right now? what it is55: When did you feel happiest? with @cruelknives56: Something that calms you down? I’ve never once been calm in my life57: Have any mental disorders? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!] lol58: What does your URL mean? it means i’m a borderline and i’m also an ass59: What three words describe you the most? Bad Awful Theworst 60: Do you believe in evolution? it doesn’t matter if u believe in it or not it’s still tru lol61: What makes you unfollow a blog? everything62: What makes you follow a blog? bad content63: Favorite kind of person: Jacob64: Favorite animal(s): idk but i have rats65: Name three of your favorite blogs. mine66: Favorite emoticon: i’m on desktop but the sparkle or the bee67: Favorite meme: all memes are bad68: What is your MBTI personality type? infp!69: What is your star sign? cancer71: What outfit out of all your clothes do you like to wear the most? the same ones72: Post a selfie or two? http://generallyqueer.tumblr.com/tagged/my-face73: Do you have platform shoes? no 74: What is one random but interesting fact about yourself? my head hurts75: Can you do a front flip? no76: Do you like birds? yea77: Do you like to swim? i used to but now dysphoria78: Is swimming or ice skating more fun to you? swimming79: Something you wish didn’t exist: me lol80: Some thing you wish did exist: money in my wallet81: Piercings you have? only my ears82: Something you really enjoy doing: sleeping83: Favorite person to talk to: Jacob84: What was your first impression of Tumblr? bad85: How many followers do you have? on this blog, 19986: Can you run a mile within ten minutes? hwo is this someone healthy87: Do your socks always match? my socks haven’t matched in eight years88: Can you touch your toes and keep your legs straight completely? idk buut i’m not gonna try89: What are your birthstones? pearl and alexandrite!90: If you were an animal, which one would you be? frog91: If a flower could aesthetically represent you, what kind would it be? i.. don’t kno somebody tell me my aesthetic flower92: A store you hate? all of them93: How many cups of coffee can you drink in one day? is that a challenge94: Would you rather be able to fly or read minds? fly cause my brain is enough95: Do you like to wear camo? never in my life96: Winter or summer? neither97: How long can you hold your breath for? don’t know not gonna try98: Least favorite person? me lol  jake99: Someone you look up to: death himself100: A store you love? idk pac sun

101: Favorite type of shoes high tops102: Where do you live? florida103: Are you a vegetarian or vegan? If so, why? no104: What is your favorite mineral or gem? rose quartz probably!105: Do you drink milk? yea106: Do you like bugs? No!107: Do you like spiders? No!!!!108: Something you get paranoid about? being alive lol109: Can you draw: technically yes110: Nosiest question you have ever been asked? idk111: A question you hate being asked? to describe myself112: Ever been bitten by a spider? idk113: Do you like the sound of waves at the beach? yea114: Do you prefer cloudy or sunny days? cloudy115: Someone you’d like to kiss or cuddle right now: mothman116: Favorite cloud type: idk117: What color do you wish the sky was? idk118: Do you have freckles? no119: Favorite thing about a person: gives me attention120: Fruits or vegetables? fruit121: Something you want to do right now: stop answering these122: Is the ocean or sky prettier? sky123: Sweet or sour foods? sweet124: Bright or dim lights? dim125: Do you believe in a certain magical creature? me126: Something you hate about Tumblr: www.tumblr.com127: Something you love about Tumblr: validation128: What do you think about the least? idk129: What would you want written on your tombstone? it was lit fam130: Who would you like to punch in the face right now? myself131: What is something you love but also hate about yourself? my entire appearance 132: Do you smile with your teeth showing for pictures? rarely133: Computer or TV? computer134: Do you like roller coasters? yea135: Do you get motion sickness or seasickness? not that often136: Are your ears lobed or attached? lobed137: Do you believe in karma? kind of138: On a scale of 1-10, how attractive would you say you are? -1 but also 11139: What nicknames do you have/have had? who140: Did you have any pretend or imaginary friends? not really141: Have you ever seen a therapist/shrink? no142: Would you say you are a good or bad influence to others? lol i influence people143: Do you prefer giving or receiving gifts/help? giving144: What makes you angry waking up every day145: How many languages do you speak fluently? 1146: Do you prefer boys, girls, and/or non-binaries? tbh who knows I lean towards mostly nb people and male-aligned ppl i think?? but i’m probably also aro so?? god147: Are you androgynous? I try148: Favorite physical thing about yourself: eyelashes149: Favorite thing about your personality: my 2 personality disorders150: Name three people you would like to talk to right now in person. no one

151: If you could go back into time and live in one era, which would you choose? dinosuars so i could get destroyed by that meteor152: Do you like BuzzFeed? no154: Do you like to kiss others’ foreheads or hands for platonic reasons? no cause i don’t really touch people lol155: Do you like to play with others’ hair? no156: What embarrasses you? being alive157: Something that makes you nervous/anxious: being alive158: Biggest lie you have ever told: i convinced my mom i was stabbed when i was seven159: How many people are you following? 205160: How many posts do you have on your blog(s)? 1,400161: How many drafts do you have on your blog(s)? 9162: How many likes do you have on your blog(s)? 195163: Last time you cried and why: today because my rat was mad at me164: Do you have long or short hair? short165: Longest your hair has ever been: like down to my ass it was bad166: Why do you like, dislike, or have neutral feelings about religon? I mean, i have opinions on religion as a whole (i’m not religious myself) but really idc, i just respect everyone’s beliefs167: Do you really care how the universe and world was created? tbh? not really168: Do you like to wear makeup? no169: Can you stand on your hands or head for more than thirty seconds? no170: Did you answer the questions you were asked truthfully? yea