#i hung out with one of them all evening today she's very nice and she mentioned schubert/pkk was confusing her and so i explained it and

[weidli]

i've made the acquaintance of a couple of first year students (some of them i'm tutoring officially and everything) and inevitably they ask me how i study how i handle writing papers and getting the citing right etc. great questions entirely reasonable things to ask someone unfortunately i have no good answers since "well buddy i cannot emphasize enough how much all this is my version of fun" is uh. Unhelpful

[bare1ythere]

eepy

[sunlightmurdock]

Ashes, Ashes | One | Bradley Bradshaw

masterlist | prologue | next chapter

Synopsis: In which Maverick didn’t make it home after the Uranium mission. He’s missing, presumed dead. There are things that have to be done — someone has to take care of the house, the bills.

So, Maverick’s daughter is back in Fightertown for the first time since she was in elementary school. There’s a gaping hole in both of their lives now, and somehow, the world’s supposed to just keep on turning without him.

Warnings: bradley bradshaw x minimally descriptive oc avery mitchell, age gap (23/33), smut, angst, hurt / comfort, mentions of character death, mourning, military inaccuracies. This entire fic and my blog is an 18+ space, minors do not interact. Do not repost.

…

Crossing the threshold into Maverick’s home doesn’t come naturally to either one of them. This place is something that they had both left behind. Outgrown. It’s solely his. It’s not their home and it has never been, until now. Now, Avery, at least, is stuck here until things are figured out.

On that fourteen hour drive down to San Diego, she’d had a lot of time to think. How long is a person supposed to wait for a body to turn up before they go ahead and throw the funeral without it?

Three paces into the hallway, brown wood floors and white walls, she is met with a smiling family picture. Only, she’s not in it. 

Because, it’s not a picture of Pete’s family. Pete doesn’t have a family. Pete Mitchell has a daughter from a one night stand with a married woman.

This picture is of a real family. Hung on the wall opposite the front door is a picture of Nick and Carole Bradshaw holding their infant son. He’s bald and gummy. They’re grinning and showing him off like a prize trophy — so proud of him even though all he did in those days was drool and pee himself. 

These days, their infant son is up to more important things. Their infant son grew to an upsettingly grand height and is carrying two of her bags in one hand behind her today.

“C’mon, Mitchell — these are heavy.” Bradley huffs softly from behind her, reminding her that she’s standing stationary and blocking his path. 

The nickname stings. Avery’s last name isn’t Mitchell because her biological father had wanted it to be. It’s Mitchell solely because her mother’s husband knew she wasn’t his and would rather die before letting her take his name.

She shrugs her duffel bag closer to her body and turns left. Bradley huffs under the weight of her luggage, watching her walk her cute butt in completely the wrong direction. “Wait, where are you going?”

Not struggling at all under the weight of her single duffel bag, she turns slowly to face him and frowns slightly. “My room.” 

Avery doesn’t remember Bradley. Not in her own memories, anyway. She knows he was around, she’s seen him in pictures but the image in her head doesn’t match. Not quite right. Like puzzle pieces bent and forced together.

He’s taller than he looked at his high school graduation, which sits pictured and framed above Mav’s mantle. Older, but that’s to be expected. Up close, he looks more like his mother than his father. A slight bump in his nose and scars, nicely healed, but jagged and raised nonetheless dusted his cheek and his throat. 

Even with all those differences, there’s a very slight familiarity to him that makes this all feel a little bit less suffocating.

Bradley’s brows draw together. He gives a small nod in the direction of the spare room. “That’s… I usually stayed in that room.”

“Oh.” Avery realises with a hum. With Bradley being ten years your senior, the room was his long before it was hers. With him growing up so close by, it was probably his much more frequently than it was hers, too. It’s not like she had ever kept anything here anyway. It’s just a guest room that she would occupy every now and again.

There’s a brief quiet between the two of them. 

“I just figured you could take the big room. ‘Til you get settled. I’ll go home once your car is fixed, if that’s what you want.” Bradley adds on. That sad little look on her face, right in front of him, is killing him. 

The big room. The loft room upstairs. Avery thinks about it and finds herself pretty sure that she’s never even been upstairs in this house.

“You’re staying too?” 

Oh. Yeah. He hadn’t addressed that point yet. Truthfully, he hadn’t even been planning to stay. He hasn’t even packed an overnight bag. But, from the second that she had stepped out of the car and looked up at the house with that look on her face, he hadn’t even considered leaving her here alone.

“Just ‘til we get your car fixed,” He offers with a small shrug. “I’ll be here to run you around until then.”

Like he’s doing this for her sake. Natasha has her own life to get back to and Bradley can’t stand the thought of going back to his apartment alone. 

“Okay,” Avery agrees, turning to peer down the hall towards the spare room. It’s nothing special — it really never felt like hers, anyway. “Alright, I’ll take Pete’s room.”

Pete. She calls Maverick ‘Pete’ now. 

Bradley just nods, shifting the weight of her bags and nodding for her to head for the stairs. All the floors in this house are tan oak. The entryway is now herringbone. With the help of a friend, Pete had done the entire thing himself. 

Of course, as they walk silently across it, neither one of them would know that. Neither one of them was speaking to him last May, which was why he had needed a project in the first place.

Natasha’s outside on the phone. Bradley’s footsteps thud on the wood of the stairs behind her, following her up. She stops at the top, leaving just enough room for Bradley to stand there behind her.

The door to Maverick’s room is open. His bed is made. There’s a book thrown on top of it, the spine cracked and used, the pages yellow from years out in the sun.

“No way is he still trying to fucking finish War and Peace.” Bradley steps around her and heads straight for the book. Pete started this book before Bradley finished elementary school. Bradley twists and looks back at her. “He always gets bored and stops reading, then forgets his page and starts again.”

Another slow nod. One foot in front of the other, her shoes along the tan oak floors. Her fingers trail the white walls. Maverick wouldn’t have minded. This place was always messy before. It’s not now. 

This house is vacant and quiet, but it’s far from empty. It’s filled to the brim, practically pulling apart at the seams with everything that Maverick was and planned to be. He was finishing War and Peace — he made it to chapter 253 this time; further than he had ever made it before. 

Suddenly, Avery’s throat is thick with the knowledge that all she knew Maverick to be, is now all that he’ll ever be. An absent father, a fantastic pilot, a lousy cook. A thousand more things that she’ll never know.

Four days of knowing, a fourteen hour drive down here, and it’s a book that stings like a cold slap to the face, reminding her of why exactly it is that she’s here.

Fire burns behind her eyes, blistering and stinging as Bradley sets her bags on the floor with a soft thud.

He turns with his attention completely on the book, his fingers extending towards the peeling cover of the paperback. His fingers curl around its weathered pages and he lifts it tenderly, examining the front at first.

It’s too early to start this process bawling her eyes out, and Avery refuses to let Russian Literature be your downfall, again.

That thick feeling sits in her throat like a stack of weights as she sits down on the end of Maverick’s bed. The mattress is soft, taking her weight without a squeak of complaint. Maybe he finally listened to her and got a bed that wasn’t so harsh on his back.

It’s been almost two years since she had even set foot in this house last. If she had known that Maverick was going to be gone this soon… she sits and thinks to herself about if she would have maybe visited more. Probably not.

“I’ll change the sheets and stuff, then I’ll get out of your hair for a bit.”

Lifting her head, she blinks at him. He has already started to pull back the comforter and strip the bottom sheet from the bed, awkwardly forcing her onto her feet again. 

Mobile once more, Avery turns slowly to take in her surroundings. This is Maverick’s room. It’s his house, she was prepared for that much — but this is his room. The last thing she wants is to be alone in it all night.

“Oh. Sure,” She nods, setting into motion to help take the sheets off.

He’s so methodical about it, like none of this phases him at all. But then, she hasn’t seen how he has been for the past few days.

“I was thinking of just ordering food tonight, since I’m kinda tired — and Pete never had groceries. Would you want… to maybe join?”

“Sure.” Bradley nods, tugging the pillows out of the cases. He glances up to her with a strictly polite, neutral smile. Quiet settles between the two of them until the bed is just a bare mattress and uncovered pillows. 

Then, there’s a moment of total stillness between the two of them. Her gaze flickers up, meeting his, and the realization settles between the two of them.

Maverick’s favourite cologne was a French thing that some woman in the eighties had liked. Citrus in the shade of cypress wood. The scent fills the room like he’s standing between the two of them.

Bradley glances down at the white sheets in his hands. The snowy white peaks of those mountains, Maverick’s aircraft spiralling into them, engulfed in flames. In a sick way, Bradley hopes that he didn’t manage to eject. At least then, it would have been instant. Maverick wouldn’t have felt anything.

Avery watches his adam’s apple bob in his throat from the other side of the bed. The last you had heard, Mav and Bradley weren’t on speaking terms. She wonders if this is as weird for him as it is for you.

“I’ll put these in the washer. You can… unpack, or whatever.” He decides finally, already taking one step backwards, headed for the door. She stands there, blinking at him. Even with those steeped, broad shoulders, he makes it through the doorframe unscathed before he turns to check where he’s going.

He probably knows this house inside and out, just like he knew her dad. Once. 

When it comes to wracking her brain and trying to remember Bradley Bradshaw, Avery can’t ever come up with anything. Maybe a glimpse, here and there. A blue t-shirt with green stripes. His school backpack accidentally left in the backseat of Maverick’s convertible beside her shoddily installed car seat. 

Truthfully, her experience with Bradley Bradshaw is limited. He’s just as real to her as any of the other guys in the stories she grew up hearing about. Her very own Peter Pan is downstairs right now, trying to figure out Maverick’s ancient washing machine, just so that he doesn’t have to stand up here and stare across at her.

He can’t hide from her forever, though. Evening comes, and so does hunger. 

He stares down at the pizza between the two of them as he chews through a bite, brows drawn together slightly. He hates thin crust pizza — it’s the worst kind of pizza. But, when she had suggested it, he had agreed with a tight-lipped smile.

Natasha has gone home. It’s just the two of them, now. Sitting in this unchanged, all too familiar kitchen. Avery has barely unpacked. She set up a couple of things in Maverick’s bathroom, but it doesn’t feel right to be in the big room upstairs. That wasn’t ever her space to claim.

She chews absentmindedly at the bite she had taken. The TV in the living room is off. The record player is coated in a layer of thin dust already. It’s dead quiet. The kitchen light is dim above their heads.

There’s a chip in the corner of the table on Bradley’s side. It’s there because Bradley was running through this kitchen when he was four years old and had tripped and knocked his front tooth out right here. His thumb trails the tiny mark, wondering how his teeth had ever been that small.

Wondering why she isn’t angry with him, too.

Maverick had picked him up that day, turned him around and held Bradley while he cried, stemming the blood and quickly introducing the concept of the tooth fairy. He had done all that he could, and Bradley still found a way to resent him for what had happened to his own father.

Bradley hasn’t ever done a thing for Avery. Except maybe pay for this pizza. And here she is, calm as can be. 

The sauce base feels tangy and coppery, and the cheese makes him want to puke. He sets the slice down on his plate and wipes his hands on the paper towel beside him.

Finally, he lifts his head and looks at her. Her hair is up differently now, tucked out of your way after an afternoon of manual labour upstairs, tidier than it had been earlier. She’s wearing a stretched out old t-shirt. Bradley assumes she got it from a boyfriend.

Really, he doesn’t think she looks that much like her old man. He would really have to search for the resemblance. But, briefly, when she offers him a polite smile across the table, he knows that you’re Mav’s kid.

“I’m sorry.” Bradley blurts out. They both look across at each other, equally surprised that he has spoken.

“…For what?” Avery asks quietly, lips tugging into a small frown.

“I’m sorry that I’m here and he’s not.” He’s just got to say it. He knows she probably wouldn’t bring it up on your own, but there’s a big elephant in this room. Bradley knows what it’s like to sit in her spot, and not know how to talk about it.

It’s his fault that Maverick didn’t make it home.

She stops chewing. That last bite sits in her mouth, doughy and dry all of a sudden. She stares across at him, awkwardly making herself swallow down the last of her bite of pizza and picking up the paper towel to wipe at her mouth.

“We weren’t that close.” She tells him, like that’s supposed to make him feel better. It doesn’t. It’s like a blow to the chest. She’ll never get the opportunity to fix things, because of him.

But, he knows what it’s like to be told how to grieve. He just dips his head and nods awkwardly. “Right.” 

“I got a call from an admiral the other day,” She picks up the slice of pizza and pick at its toppings. There’s no one here now to tell her not to play with your food. Mav never really cared anyway. Bradley watches her, unhungry. “Invited me down to Miramar. He said he was a friend of Mav’s and that he could talk me through… this whole thing. How it works.”

Bradley rubs a hand over the neatly trimmed hair above his lip. It feels like he has swallowed a golf ball, sitting here like it’s normal to be discussing the measures.

He knows how it works. It won’t be as simple as it was with his own father. At least Maverick had afforded him something to bury. For her, there’s nothing.

“I’ll have to be there around eleven.” 

“Sure,” Bradley nods, scratching at the back of his neck. His legs tingle with stiffness. Clearing his throat, he shifts in the little wooden chair and stretches, knocking his foot into hers under the table. “Oh. Sorry. I’m sorry.”

Her teeth press into the inside of your cheek. Maverick hadn’t ever described Bradley as this nervous.

“It’s fine.” She hums, pushing back in her chair and standing up from the table. “Well, I’ve been up since like… four, so I might just hit the hay.”

“Sure.” Bradley breathes out, hands braced on his thighs, eyes focussed on that tiny chip in the corner of the table. “Yeah. Goodnight.”

The downstairs bedroom seemed bigger when he was a kid. The twin-sized bunks on the carrier feel bigger than the wooden-framed bed that Maverick put in here. Bradley’s shoulder is practically hanging off the side, and the old frame creaks with each movement he makes.

It’s not like he would be sleeping much anyway. When he closes his eyes, the only thing he can see is the fireball Maverick’s plane had turned into as it fell.

Bradley’s hunched over the coffee pot by the time that Avery wakes up. He hears her coming down the stairs and straightens up like he wasn’t three seconds from throwing the stupid thing at the wall, clearing his throat and turning around.

It occurs to him that he should have put a shirt on. This isn’t his place. It’s hers, now, he guesses — either way, he hadn’t considered making her uncomfortable. He folds his arms over his naked torso as she strolls into the kitchen, hair mussed and rubbing at her eyes.

She’s wearing big socks and the same big t-shirt she had worn to eat the pizza last night. He can’t tell if she’s wearing shorts or not.

“Morning,” He offers up, making her lift her gaze from busily tapping at her phone. Her gaze lands squarely on his navel — more so, how low his shorts sit on his hips and the way a soft trail of brown hair ventures from there to his bellybutton. 

Blinking, she finds his face.

“Coffee machine’s broken, we can stop somewhere on the way to base if you like.” He leans down a little bit, like an awkward teenager shrinking away from a family picture. She locks her gaze on his, trying not to glance back down at his muscles. 

“Oh. That’s not broken — if you hit it hard enough, it’ll work.” She heads right for him, fuzzy socks padding across the floor so softly that it really does startle him when she grabs the copy of War and Peace that now sits on the kitchen counter, and slam the book right into the side of the coffee machine.

He whips around as the machine whirs to life. Avery the book back down gently, and look up at him. He sets his jaw, brows knitted together, searching her face.

Maverick never taught Bradley anything like that. In fact — Bradley always, always was taught the opposite. You never take the easy way out; if something’s worth fixing, then you fix it right.

Then you, you on the other hand, beat the thing with the heaviest book you can find? He just doesn’t get it.

“Well. Thanks.” He guesses, turning his bemused expression back to the brewing coffee. 

He hadn’t been expecting you to do that. Doesn’t take a genius to figure that out, given the way he’s still glaring at the machine. That coffee pot is older than you are, and Mav never taught him that trick?

“So this guy, the one who called me,” Avery skims her fingers along the cool granite countertop, just to have something to do, “He was the guy calling the shots up there?”

Bradley blinks. He doesn’t know how much she knows about the way all of this works. He knew everything there is to know long before he ever enlisted, but that was because he wanted to know.

“Um,” Bradley grabs his mug and takes a step back for her to get herself one.  “He was our mission command so, kind of. He gives orders — but, y’know, everything happens fast, it’s… it’s hard to call the shots from back on the boat.” 

“Did he like Mav much?” She asks, head tucked inside the fridge door as you scan for anything to make her coffee a little less black. Nothing. A couple of beers and a block of good German cheese. She swings it shut with a resigned sigh, wondering if she’ll be here long enough to need groceries.

The thought flashes across her mind — what’ll happen to this place when she leaves it behind?

“Uh... No, not really.” After a routine training presentation at the very beginning of their attachment, Admiral Simpson had once become so agitated by Maverick that he snapped his own reading glasses in half. Mav got a good laugh out of it, at least.

“Great.” Agitation creeps into her tone as she curls her fingers around a plain white coffee mug. All of his kitchenware is plain white. 

“What?” Bradley tilts his head, trying to catch a glimpse at the look on her face, stuck between whether she’s sad or pissed off.

It’s an easy answer, rolling off of her tongue with a shrug of her shoulders and a deflated sigh. “People usually put us in the same boat — if they don’t like him, they don’t like me.”

That’s something that he thinks he can understand. There’s not an instant dislike, but there’s a pity that he finds in the eyes of people who once knew his father. 

He screws his mouth up, shaking his head and reaching for her without thought. His palm claps against her shoulder, platonic and soothing, but the first time he has touched you nonetheless. “I’ll be there. He won’t say a thing.”

Glancing upward, while his palm lingers on her shoulder, her eyes flit across his features. He doesn’t know quite what she’s searching for, or whether she finds it. His fingers squeeze softly against her skin before the touch is gone all together.

They drink their coffees in parallel, both subtly miserable in their silence but comfortable in it anyway. It’s difficult to prepare for a meeting like this — she doesn’t have a clue of what to expect. 

Bradley wears black jeans and boots with a plain white t-shirt, which convinces her not to wear the more formal dress she had thought she’d have to wear. She slips into his passenger seat in a skirt and Mary Janes.

He drives a loud, blue vintage Bronco. It sparkles inside and out, and makes her dusty old car look even worse. 

Bradley settles behind the wheel to the sound of chilled seventies music, the radio turned low. He drives with three fingers curled around the bottom of the wheel and the other hand resting absently on the stick shift.

Even though he seems calm enough behind the wheel, she watches him chew at the inside of his cheek for the duration of the drive. Gears tick away inside his head. His knee only stops bouncing nervously when it’s time to press his foot against the pedal.

He’s not as good at pretending as he thinks he is; she silently appreciates that he tries, either way.

Bradley, truthfully, spends the entire drive thinking about the last time he was face to face with Admiral Simpson. ‘Son, I’m doing this for you.’ He had sworn, face sullen, uttering the exact same words Pete Mitchell once had when delivering the words that had torn Bradley from him the first time.

Only, Admiral Simpson wasn’t pulling Bradley’s papers — he was just putting him on a month long bereavement leave. His protests had fallen on deaf ears once again, as they had fifteen years ago. He’s now a week into that leave, but it feels like longer.

It turns out that when sleep is cut from the equation, everything feels a lot longer. In his own apartment, his routine has been getting up at 2am after hours of tossing and turning, going for a run all the way down to the docks, coming back and showering, then waiting for the sun to rise.

Last night, he’d been awake in that creaky old twin bed, struck by the realisation that if he spent all night tossing and turning — one, he might actually break the old bed frame, and two, the squeaking of it would definitely keep Avery up. 

All it had taken was the focus of trying to sit still for so long to finally knock him out. It was the best that he’d slept since the mission.

He kind of hopes that it’ll take him a while to figure out something to do with her car; at least that way he’ll be able to sleep at night. 

“You ready?” His voice startles Avery from her daydream, the engine cutting out with a jingle of the keys as he stretches forwards in his seat to shove them into his pocket. “We’re headed just over there.”

“Yeah, let’s get this over with.” She’s stepping down and swinging the heavy door shut before she’s taking her next breath, leaving him to catch up to her. 

His long strides have him at her side before long, reaching ahead of her to pull open the glass door to the post headquarters. 

This process has already been easier with him at her side. He’d coolly handed over his service ID and greeted the guard at the gate by name, and he stops her from turning sharply down the wrong hallway with a soft bump of his shoulder against hers.

He catches her forearm as she tries to blow right past the front desk, his grip loose but firm. 

“Rooster.” The woman behind the desk stands up sharply, looking sharp in her service khakis, her entire face creased with a deep worry. She’s older, maybe around Mav’s age. “I heard, I’m so sorry.”

Rooster loosens his hold on her forearm, his lips flattening into a line. He stands up straight, his interaction with the woman nothing if not totally polite. His thumb trails across the bend of her wrist as he nods his head towards her.

“Thank you,” He says softly, seemingly unaware of the way Avery has stiffened in the presence of this woman. “We’re, uh… we’re just here to see Cyclone, Lynn.”

Her warm, brown eyes whip towards Avery, widening. Recognition floods her features as she pieces together who the girl at Bradley's side must be. 

Her boots hit the ground, Avery's lips parting slightly as she realises that this stranger is headed right for her. Bradley feels Avery's arm tug in his grip and turns his head, taking note of the way she's trying to shrink behind him.

Lynn is a hugger by nature, and she was a good friend of Mav’s for a long time. She means well, but Bradley isn’t going to let her touch Avery when he can see how unnerved it makes her.

“We’re a little late. I’ll catch you at the O-Bar this weekend?” His fingers uncurl from her forearm and his palm falls flat between her shoulder blades, giving her a gentle nudge and silent permission to avoid Lynn's hug.

The woman stops and there’s another polite, departing exchange between the two of them while Avery continues down the hall.

Bradley catches up to her as she raps her knuckles against the doorframe, fingers trembling when they come to settle back against her thighs.

“Miss Mitchell.” A chair scrapes along the tiled floor, Cyclone’s signature rumbling voice carrying out into the hallway. His boots tap across the ground, his face creased with sincerity and his hand outstretched when he notices Bradley standing behind the young woman he had arranged this meeting with. “Bradley Bradshaw.”

Avery checks back over her shoulder, glancing briefly at the man behind her, who has assumed his best bodyguard impression. 

Standing tall, his uniform crisp and his greying black hair combed neatly, Admiral Beau Simpson slips his palm into hers and shakes her hand curtly. The sunlight catches on his shining name badge, his face heavy with lines and sharp angles.

Letting her hand go, he then reaches to her right to shake Bradley’s. Bradley’s chest bumps her back as he leans into the handshake.

Avery steps away from him, angling yourself closer to the doorframe. “He just gave me a ride here. Is it okay if he comes in?”

“Of course,” Cyclone is far more polite to her than he has ever been to Bradley. “Anything you need. Please, take a seat.”

It feels a little bit wrong standing before his boss in jeans, and sitting before him. Everything about this feels a little bit wrong. Bradley rests his chin against his fist.

Avery sits in the chair beside him, shoving your trembling hands under your thighs, straightening up and trying to look as brave as you can. 

It shouldn’t be this stranger sitting beside you in this meeting — your mother should have come with you.

“Miss Mitchell,” The admiral takes his seat on the other side of his desk once again. “I want to first express my deepest condolences. Your father was a good man, and a… extremely skilled pilot.”

Bradley almost scoffs. Even now, Cyclone can’t manage to compliment him, not really.

“We are forever grateful for his service, and the sacrifices he made on behalf of our country. I understand that this is an extremely difficult time, and I’d just like to say that I’m going to personally make sure that this process is as easy as it can possibly be.”

Avery blinks at him. Jet engines rumble on outside of the window. People bustle on outside of the closed office door.

Cyclone glances towards Bradley. 

“When a man is lost in action, our resolve is to initiate a search and rescue effort as soon as possible,” The admiral explains, leaving out the part where that search and rescue effort had been delayed by seventy-two hours after Mav disappeared. “We’ve been working tirelessly, and our efforts to locate your father are ongoing.”

Her brows knit together, lips pursed, unimpressed.

“But— he’s dead.” She frowns abruptly, rendering Cyclone suddenly quiet. “He’s got to be. It’s been a week. No food, no water, sub-zero temperature. What’s the point in looking?”

Bradley grits his teeth. He looks across at her, her words like a jolt of ice-cold water, the muscle in his jaw ticking. There’s nothing in her expression, no fear or sadness. Pete deserved more than that.

“The point is to bring him home.” He bites from her side, staring straight ahead at Cyclone.

She shoots him a look. When it’s clear that she isn’t going to say anything else, Cyclone clears his throat to continue. 

“Miss Mitchell, we do have to prepare ourselves for the other outcome. If recovery efforts are unsuccessful, in two weeks time, he will be listed as formally ‘Missing in Action’. If that’s the case, we will honor him with a memorial service and all of his service records and personal effects are delivered to you.”

She drags her teeth across her plush bottom lip, swallowing hard and giving a small nod of her head. Closing her eyes for a moment, she pictures the moment that this is all over. She can get out of here and pretend it never happened.

“Okay. Two weeks?”

“This is going to be a longer process,” Cyclone warns her. He’d heard that she had come down specially for this, and he doesn’t want to mislead her about the time frame. “The recovery mission, if unsuccessful, will be suspended in two weeks’ time. After that, we’d like you to be local for the investigation.”

“Investigation?”

“Of ourselves. To ensure that the Navy had performed its due diligence, that kind of thing… I’d expect us to be here for a good few months.” He explains.

After that, it’s like Bradley can see a switch flip for her. 

She’s biting at the inside of her cheek so hard that she must be tasting copper, picking at the seam of her skirt and breathing like she’s trying not to cry.

He’s still confused when he’s all but chasing her across the parking lot, listening to her try to control her breathing.

“Hey, hey, hey,” He tries, approaching her cautiously as she crowds herself against the passenger side of his car. “It’s alright. We’ll get through it, it’s just a couple of months.”

“I— fuck. I don’t want to be here. I-I— I’m going to have to find a job, and I’ll have to call my mom, and— and my friends, and—“

“Hey,” Bradley mumbles, resisting the instinct to throw his arms around her. His brows draw together as he reaches out and squeezes her bicep, bending his knees so he can catch her eye. “It’s alright. I’ll take care of it.”

Avery knows that he’s just trying to be nice, but really, she’s sick of nice. It’s all that Maverick ever was and it left her with no idea of who he really is. “Of what? There’s so much that I have to—“

He nods, closing his mouth, swallowing dryly. Thinking of what he can, feasibly, take off of her plate for her. The idea sparks in him.

“You need a job. I can get you a job. Um, your friends, we can call them and bring them down for a weekend?” He squeezes again at her bicep, nodding his way through his plans, trying to will the tears in her eyes not to spill over.

She sniffs, turning her gaze towards the ground. The lump in Avery’s throat burns and bobs as she tries to swallow it away. 

Mav really is never coming back.

“I don’t want to go back to his house.” It comes out as a whimper, and really just reminds Bradley that she is in the same position that he was when he was just a little younger than her. It’s a scared kid type of feeling, being all alone in the world. Being in an empty house had made it even worse.

He licks his lips and glances towards the skies, watching the sun pass behind a cloud. 

“You could stay at my place, for a night or two.” 

…

[4ln-stay8]

A stream full of surprises

✑ summary: you join Max for a stream that doesn’t go the way you expected to

✑ pairing: lando norris x fem!reader

✑ autor’s note: so this is my first attempt on doing this so Im really sorry if it sucks

✑ warnings: some stuff might not be accurate but its a fanfic so just pretend

You sat nervously in front of the computer, joining Max Fewtrell's Twitch stream for the first time. You and Max had become close friends fast, thanks to your secret relationship with Lando Norris. Due to you being often alone for a few weeks in a row sometimes, you and Max often hung out when Lando was busy with Formula 1 commitments.

You were often busy studying to get your masters degree. You sometimes needed to stay behind on all the fun you could have by joining Lando and travelling with him but you needed to study so you could keep your scholarship.

“Hi guys! Welcome back to the stream! Today we have a guest who will be joining us, my good friend Y/N. Say hi to her chat!” said Max starting his stream.

The stream started surprisingly well. The chat didn’t payed much attention to you at first, even tho Max made sure that your presence is known. They were very busy trying to get Max to respond to their questions. It took them about 10 minutes to actually acknowledge your presence and then the hell got loose. The chat was flying with questions about who you were and why were you there. Speculations about the relationship between you and Max, people asking where Pietra was and why were you there instead of her were all you could read.

*Chatuser: who is that?

*Chatuser: where is P?

*Chatuser: is she your new gf?

*Chatuser: why is she here?

Max, being the lovely person he is tried very politely to respond to as many questions as he could.

“Guys, as I said, this is my friend Y/n and she will be joining us for today’s stream so be nice chat”

To your surprise, the stream went pretty smoothly from then on. As you chatted and laughed on the stream, the chat kept buzzing with speculations about you and Max being more than just friends. With each new viewer the subject of who you were and what was your business with Max kept repeating over and over again. You then started to blush at the comments, unsure of how to respond.

You weren’t used to being in the spotlight, one of the reasons why you and Lando were keeping things a secret. Unlike them, you weren’t trained to respond in front of cameras, how to respond to personal questions as politely as possible without actually answering them. You were totally unprepared and in that exact moment you hated yourself for letting Max convince you to join him.

You strongly disagreed to his proposal about the stream, not even Lando could convince you to join him but after Max repeatedly asking for you to join you changed your mind and agreed to do it.

Don’t get me wrong, there was nothing you wanted more than to stream with your boyfriend. Seeing him become a chaotic storm, watching his eyes light up whenever he would get a sub or have fun. There was nothing more you wanted that to hear his loud laughs and frustrated screams whenever he was gaming. You wanted to be a part of it but you couldn’t.

You were a very shy and awkward person around strangers and knowing there were thousands of people watching you didn’t sound pleasing to you, but you wanted to change that. You wanted to become more comfortable in front of the camera so you could be all the way in, in your relationship. You wanted to be more comfortable with the fans before you would announce your relationship with Lando and join him around the world. You wanted to make sure they liked you.

Meanwhile, Lando was on his way home from the airport, having just returned from the last race weekend of the season. He got bored on the uber drive and he decided to tune into Max's stream to see what was he getting up to. He was surprised to see his girlfriend on the screen. He often tried to convince you to join him on the streams but you just didn’t agree with him. He didn’t want to push you to do it knowing how shy you can get but what he didn’t understand was why did you accepted Max’s offer instead of his. He just stood there, surprised and confused, watching in silence as the chat filled with ship names and teasing messages about you and Max.

His jealousy flared, and he couldn't help himself. When he finally arrived home, he payed the driver, quickly took his bags and he burst into the house. He left all his things by the door and ran to the room you were in. He opened the door loudly, surprising both you and Max, causing you to jump in your seat.

Lando didn't waste a moment. He quickly approached you without saying a word. When he got in front of you, he cupped your face and he leaned in and planted a passionate kiss on your lips right in front of the camera. The chat went wild, emojis and exclamation marks flooding the screen. Everyone was stunned not knowing what the hell was going on.

*Chatuser: what just happened?

*Chatuser: did lando just kissed y/n?

*Chatuser: 😱

You were petrified at first, your eyes wide as you tried to process what was happening, but then you slowly melted into the kiss, your hand finding its way to the back of Lando's neck. You missed the way his lips felt on yours, the way his hands cupped your face, his thumb slowly brushing your cheek. You were addicted to his kiss. You were addicted to him. It was a brief moment, but it felt like an eternity in front of thousands of viewers. Time just stopped whenever he was near you.

When you finally pulled apart, Lando realized what he had just done. He looked at you with wide eyes and pink cheeks as he was trying to think his next move. He chuckled nervously and helped you to your feet, settling you on his lap as he took your place in front of the camera.

"Hey, everyone," Lando began, trying to hide his embarrassment. "I guess I should explain what just happened." He glanced at you, who was still blushing furiously. You got all shy and he knew it.

“So as you most likely saw, I kissed Y/n. Well that would be scandalous in different circumstances but the truth is that Y/N and I have been dating for the past year. Well, I hope we still are after that stunt I pulled” he said chuckling and he looked at you for reassurance.

“We decided not to make it public due to the fact that Y/N gets a bit shy around strangers and I wanted to make sure that she is as comfortable as possible in this relationship.” He said giving you a small smile

The chat went crazy about all that was happening. Not only did they witness a very private and intimate moment between the two of you, but they also got to see the way Lando looked at you while he was trying to explain the situation.

*Chatuser: the way he looks at her trying to make sure she’s comfortable 😫

*Chatuser: can they be any cuter?

*Chatuser: God it’s me again…

Max was sitting quietly next to you, only making his presence known with small chuckles as he read the chat. He patiently waited for you to finish your conversation before he could actually start teasing his dear friend.

You stayed quiet as well, giving small smiles to the camera trying not to seem rude. You read the comments as well, smiling even wider as you saw how nice and accepting the fans were to you so you decided to make your presence known by teasing your boyfriend.

You leaned in and whispered to Lando, "You couldn't handle the chat teasing us, could you?"

Lando laughed, brushing a strand of hair from your face. "I guess not," he admitted. “ You know I don’t like sharing whats mine” he said playfully.

You looked at him amused and decided to keep teasing him. “I mean, Max is quite charming today I’m not gonna lie” you made a small pause looking at the way his brows frowned “…but you know I only got my eyes on you, right?

You smiled looking at him, your heart swelling with love. You just adore him in ways you didn’t even know that was possible until you met him.

He looked at you with love in his eyes, trying to memorise the way you look, and answered with a simple “I know my love! I only got my eyes on you as well” he said lovingly.

The chat continued to explode with comments, but now it was filled with hearts and messages of support for the couple. Max, who had been silently watching the whole exchange, grinned and gave them a thumbs-up.

“You know guys, if I knew I had to watch you being grossly cute again I wouldn’t have let Y/n join me” said Max earning a light slap on the shoulder from you.

“Oh shut it Max… It’s not like you don’t do the same” you said rolling your eyes giggling at how chill your friend was.

“So what are we gonna do know?” Asked Max trying to change the subject while it was still in a respectful state.

“How about you guys go play something while I’ll go find P?” You said slowly standing up from Lando’s lap ignoring his protests.

“Fine we will play something. You can go and gossip with P now but first give me a kiss” said Lando trying to look as cool as possible.

You leaned in and pecked his lips one more time before slowly walking towards the door. Lando groaned as he didn’t got the kiss he was hoping for, making you giggle.

The boys went back to the stream playing games and causing chaos as they usually do while ypu and P enjoyed some quality talks while drinking some tea.

You never would’ve thought that this would be the way the world would find out about your relationship and you definitely didn’t expect the fans to be so nice about it. At the end of the day you were really grateful that Lando did what he did knowing that you now could stop hiding your love.

[woso-dreamzzz]

Nena II

Barcelona Femení x Child!Reader

Summary: Just another day at your sister's work

You giggled as Asisat lifted from her shoulders and swung you around. Your tummy went all fluttery in a good way as she kept going before releasing you to stumble about.

She caught you when you lost your footing, putting you upright again and smothering a laugh when you fell right back onto the floor.

"Again?" She asked.

You got up immediately, nodding. "Uh-huh!"

"I think we should take a break," Sandra said as she approached," Or the little miss might throw up her breakfast."

"Ingrid's Mapi made pancakes!" You said excitedly," And Ingrid let me have syrup with it!"

"Wow!" Sandra said to you before turning to Asisat," It'll be a pain to clean if she pukes that all up and then you'll have to explain to Ingrid why we've got her kid sister throwing up her food."

"Alright." Asisat ruffled your hair. "Maybe later then."

"Later!" You agreed before allowing Sandra to take your hand and lead you to a shady area.

You had fallen into an easy routine in the past few weeks you've spent in Barcelona. Ingrid and her Mapi would get you ready for the day where one of their teammates (usually Frido or Keira) would take you out onto the field where you would sit in the shady area where the goalkeepers practiced.

Today, though, you were joined by familiar faces.

"Jana! Bruna! Look, I made pictures!"

The two girls, cleared from medical enough to lightly train but not enough to do the extremely complicated drills that were currently going on, hung out with you.

"That is very good, y/n," Jana complimented," You're the best colourer."

"I am very good." You knew that already because Ingrid and her Mapi told you often but, still, it was nice to be recognised for your talent. "You colour."

You tore a sheet out of your book and gave it to Jana along with a purple pencil.

You did the same for Bruna before deciding, after watching her for a moment, that she wasn't doing well so you sat on her lap and helped her.

"In the lines," You told her, parroting the words your Papa used to say to you," So it's not messy anymore. Don't worry. You'll get better when you practice more."

"Gracias, y/n," Bruna said," I'm sure with an expert like you, I will get it in no time."

You nodded and grabbed another sheet. "Mama says you have to practice to get better. She says that's why Ingrid's so good at the ball game so you have to practice your colouring, Bruna. So you can get better."

The warm Spanish sun beat down upon you and your friends as the other girls trained. When it get even hotter, Jana and Bruna gave you two bottles of water and sent you on your way with them.

"Gemma! Cata!" You said as you approached," Here!"

"Our hero!" Cata said as she unscrewed the lid and drained it. "Thanks, kiddo! Gemma, thank her."

Gemma sprayed water at Cata. "I was going to before you interrupted." She leaned down to hug you before allowing you to chug from her drink. "Thanks for the drink, little buddy. Why don't you head on back to Jana and Bruna and do some more colouring? It's nearly time for lunch."

Gemma was right because no sooner had you completed your third picture, did Marta and Caro come to collect you.

Your hand fit easily into Caro's hand and you took Marta's too - just because you could. Together, they swung you into the air every few steps and you giggled ecstatically every time.

Marta laughed with you while Caro settled for just a smile. You beamed at them both - especially when Caro decided to make a pitstop to get you a chocolate bar from the vending machine.

Marta ended up making your plate for lunch and no matter how much you begged and begged, she stuck to the list of approved food your sister had given her.

"Go on, nena," She said, directing you to a very full table," Can I trust you girls to look after her?" The occupants of said table all nodded and she gave them a fierce look before relenting.

Lucy stopped you from sitting down, grabbing her jacket to pile it onto the empty seat. She nudged Keira. "Pass it over." Once Keira surrendered her own jacket as well as Ona, Salma and Esmee, Lucy used them all to create a makeshift booster seat for you before plonking you onto it and pushing your food closer.

"I heard you had a fun weekend, nena," Ona said with a smile, glancing around before pushing part of her nice food onto your plate.

You nodded. "Uh-huh, Ingrid took me to the park and her Mapi let me take Bagheera on a walk."

Esmee rolled her eyes with a huff of a laugh. "She spoils that cat."

"Bagheera's my best boy," You replied to her, cramming food into your mouth," He naps in sunspots and sleeps in my bed with me."

"Really?" Keira asked before glaring daggers at Lucy," Sounds just like Narla."

You cocked your head to the side. "Tia Alexia's dog sleeps in her bed?"

"She means my dog," Lucy said as she ruffled your hair," I have a dog called Narla too."

You made a face. "That's mean, Lucy," You said," You shouldn't name your dog after Tia's Nala. She could get bullied."

Salma, on your other side, laughed. "I don't think dogs get bullied, nena."

"Cats get bullied," You said," Ingrid's Mapi said that's why Bagheera isn't allowed out without her - because the neighbourhood cats bully him. The other dogs could bully Lucy's Narla."

Salma chuckled as she ruffled your hair and shovelled food into your mouth. "Never change, nena. You're adorable."

You made a face at that but didn't argue, allowing Salma to feed you to rest of your meal.

You got restless halfway through lunch and slipped off your seat to tug on Irene's sleeve. You bounced up and down urgently. "Toilet," You said to her because she was Mateo's mama and your mama told you that every mama in the world recognised the potty dance.

Thankfully, your mama was right because Irene excused herself from her conversation and took your hand, leading you to the bathroom.

You did your business quickly but had to be lifted up to reach the sink and then again to use the hand dryer - bursting into hysterical giggles when Irene poked you in the stomach when your top rode up.

By the time you got out of the toilet, lunch had finished and Mariona joined the two of you on your walk to the gym.

"Looking cool in your shoes, nena," She said.

You grinned at her proudly. "They're my most favourite!" Yet again, you had chosen to wear your new light-up shoes. You had been wearing them a lot recently so now Ingrid didn't get worried your feet would start aching because they had finally been broken in.

"Well, they're my most favourite too!" Mariona replied.

"Good!" You said firmly, patting her side in approval with a smiling face. Mariona was pretty cool most of the time when she wasn't running around like a headless chicken and she was doubly cool when she talked to you about your new shoes.

"Are we talking about super cool light-up shoes because..." Patri stamped her feet and the bottom of her shoes lit up into a rainbow.

You gasped and jumped, showing that your shoes could do the same.

"I told you I'd find them, nena! Look at us, we're matching!"

"We are!"

Patri took your hands from Irene and jumped up and down with you, both of your shoes lighting up in sync. You giggled hysterically as the colours bounced.

Over her shoulder, you spied another recognisable face.

"Claudia! Claudia!" You exclaimed," Look! Look! We match!"

You and Patri jumped again to prove your point and Claudia gasped. She glanced around like she had a secret before beckoning you closer.

"You know what?" She asked.

"What?"

"All three of us match!"

She stamped her feet and her shoes lit up too.

You gasped.

"Wow! So cool!"

You looked around the room, holding onto Patri and Claudia and dragging them over to the corner of the gym.

"Aitana! Aitana! Aitana! We match!"

The three of you stamped your feet, causing the rainbow lights to appear again.

Aitana, as she lifted weights, smiled at you. "That's really cool, nena."

You looked down at Aitana's sad, boring shoes and sighed. You released Claudia and Patri to pat Aitana on the leg consolingly.

"It's okay," You told her," If you ask very nicely Claudia and Patri can take you to get matching shoes too."

She let out a chuckle. "Thanks, nena."

Before you could make any more suggestions though, you were pulled away from your friends by Frido, who promptly led you over to the opposite side of the gym which had been set up for your nap time.

You frowned. "Don't wanna nap," You complained.

Frido sighed. "I know. I don't want you to nap either but Ingrid says so."

You huffed. "Ingrid's not the boss of you."

Frido's eyebrows raised. "Somehow, I don't think Ingrid agrees with that. Come on, you, nap time. I'll get you some cake tomorrow if you nap now."

Your eyes narrowed. "With sprinkles?"

"With sprinkles."

"Okay. Naptime now."

Your nap went by very quickly and when you ended it, you still felt groggy.

Someone was touching you though and you squirmed around in their arms until your head was tucked into their neck. They were nice though, nice and warm even if they jostled you every time they took a step.

"You should take a picture for Olga," Your Ingrid's Mapi teased," It might get you one of these sooner rather than later."

"I'm quite content with this one." It was Tia Alexia's voice that spoke next and you realised that you were in her arms.

You blinked away your sleepiness and rubbed your eyes. "Hola, Tia," You said softly.

"Hola, nena," She replied," You slept a long while. I was getting worried you would sleep forever."

"Silly, Tia," You said," That's not possible."

"No?" She teased," Oh, silly me!" She bounced you. "It's nice to see you, nena. I was worried I wouldn't see you today."

"I always like seeing you, Tia," You replied.

"I like see you too."

You turned your head out of her neck and smiled softly at Ingrid's Mapi.

She smiled back at you, a small smile that was reserved only for you. "Hola, elskling," She said and her use of Ingrid's nickname for you made you feel all nice and fluttery inside. "We're heading home now. Ingrid's getting the car all nice and ready for us."

You nodded but didn't say anything else. You still felt kind of tired and sleepy so just soaked in Tia Alexia's warmth and the steady hum of talking between her and Ingrid's Mapi.

You didn't even notice when you moved from Tia Alexia's arms to your Ingrid's until you were placed in your car seat and strapped in.

Ingrid hovered over you as she wiped up the drool from your cheek. "Hi, elskling. Don't you look all nice and sleepy?"

"Frido made me nap," You replied, eyes drooping as she clipped in the last buckle," But I wasn't really sleepy."

"I bet you're sleepy now though, right?"

You nodded and yawned. "Little bit."

"That's alright, elskling," She said," You have a nice little nap in the car and then you can get up when we get home."

"Okay..." Your eyes drooped even lower. "Mapi?"

"Si, elskling?"

"Can we have cuddles with Bagheera on the sofa when I wake up?"

"Of course, elskling. I'm sure Bagheera would love to cuddle with you."

"And you."

"And me."

"And Ingrid."

"And Ingrid too."

[truthfulpoint]

I just “unknowingly” fucked my gf’s best friend

Edit: story is split into 3 sections

1. Some background and context

2. The story

3. Where things get wild

Also sorry it’s really long. This just happened to me and I didn’t want to miss anything so I just typed as I recalled what happened. Also sorry for any errors, I didn’t proof read anything.

Some background and context:

I work mid shift at my work currently (11pm - 7am) so I have these not so great black out curtains that I don’t really use but I also have a sleep mask that I use a lot as it helps me stay asleep.

I have “jokingly” asked my gf a couple times if she’d be interested in a 3 some with one of her friends a couple times just feeling out how she would respond and she always said no without any hints of a maybe.

I have a couple kinks that my gf is well aware of. I love stockings/pantyhose/tights, whatever you want to call them. Idk why I just think they are sexy and I like the feel/look of them. I also really like being woken up into sexual situations. I’m always super horny right when I wake up and told my gf I would love to wake up to my cock in her mouth which has happened a couple of times but not often due to my gf not being horny throughout the day, only around the evening. Lastly we have restraints tied to each corner of the bed that my gf and I enjoy very much. We both use them on each other and pair it up nicely with my sleep mask.

I live in a one bedroom apartment. We have a queen size bed with a bathroom outside the bedroom and a living room on the other side of the bedroom wall. Our kitchen is attached to the living room. We have a decent sized couch in the living room as well

This happened today as I’m writing this about an hour ago and I don’t know what to make of it or if I should confront my gf about it and ask her (giving away the fact that I know what really happened)

My gf and I went to the same high school but never saw/talked to each other. We didn’t really know the other existed until a year after we graduated through a mutual friend

The story:

So my gf (let’s call her Sarah) had one of her best friends from high school come visit and stay with us for a couple days (let’s call her Kate). I was crushing on Kate hard in high school but never told anyone or made a move. Kate is about 5’4” with an athletic build. She played soccer so she had a nice toned ass and was very fit. She had long black hair and very pretty green eyes. She flew in Thursday morning and is leaving Monday morning. Sarah told me the plan, they were doing something everyday like going to the beach or downtown and I had my own plans so it was going to be a great time for the two of them to catch up.

Me and Sarah got Kate from the airport around 10am Thursday and got to our apartment. Kate said she was tired and didn’t want to go out and do anything so we just hung out for a bit and I had to go to sleep at noon because I had to be at work that night. I make my self some sleepy time tea with melatonin in it like I always do before bed bc it helps me stay asleep. Then I go to bed like normal while they are catching up in the living room. I wake up and start getting ready for work. I go to the bathroom to shower and see that Sarah and Kate are still talking but there are a few drinks on the coffee table next to them and they seem to be whispering and giggling more than just catching up.

I shower and then make sure to help get Sarah get Kate’s bed (the living room couch) all set up to sleep in. I say bye and go to work. I get off work and head home. It was a rough day and I just need to get some sleep. Normally I try to pull through and stay up until noon to stay on a schedule but often times I’ll pass out right when I get home. I open my apartment door and the first thing I see is Kate.

She laying down sideways on the couch with the blanket over her fast asleep. I try to be quiet as it’s 7:30am and I don’t know how late they stayed up. I keep looking at her thinking about how attractive she is. Fantasy thoughts come across my brain. I think what if I just came up and started eating her out or fingering her. I think it but I would never actually do anything like that. I’m very respectfully of my relationship and I would never do anything without consent but the sexual though keep rushing over me.

I brush it off and go to the bedroom, Sarah is sleeping too so I quietly get a change of clothes out the dresser and go to the bathroom to shower. I normally come out the bathroom in just my underwear but knowing we have company I put shorts and a shirt on too. I get out and go to the kitchen to make some sleepy time tea and see that Kate is already awake. The blanket is over her still with one arm under it and the other arm over it holding her phone. I guess I was more hornet than I thought bc I immediately pictured her touching herself under the blanket. I say good morning and ask if my shower woke her up.

She said no she didn’t even hear the shower she just woke up naturally. I start boiling water in the tea kettle and ask if she wants any tea. She says “sure what kind do you have?” As she gets up and starts walking into the kitchen. She’s wearing a baggy oversized t shirt and I’m assuming some short athletic shorts that I can’t really see bc the shirt covers them. I can tell she doesn’t have a bra on immediately and try not to get caught looking. I do t know about bra sizes but I’d guess Sarah has C cup. They are pretty decent size but Kate’s are definitely bigger. Not by a lot but bigger.

Kate walks over and I open the pantry saying “pretty much just sleepy time and normal green tea”. She stands in front of me looking into the pantry and I can smell her hair which smells amazing. She slightly leans over to grab the green tea and I can’t help but look at her ass that’s still so pronounced even though her shirt is draped over it. “I’ll just have the green tea then” as she hands me the green tea box.

I make the tea and we sit together on the couch enjoying it. Just small talk the entire time. Not any hints of any sexual undertones or anything. So I finish my tea and tell her I’m going to bed. I put everything away and go to bed. I stripped to my underwear, put on my sleeping mask and fell asleep.

Where things get wild:

I wake up not knowing what time it was (I’m assuming around 8pm bc that sleepy time tea really works at keeping me asleep). I can immediately tell that my underwear is off and I’m restrained. My legs and arms are spread apart and tied to the bed. I pretend to stay asleep as I know that this means sexy time. I woke up with a full on boner and no way was that going down now that I knew what was coming. I don’t move or make any noise or change my breathing but I can tell it’s still pretty lit up in the room by natural light through a crack in the sleeping mask by my nose. I can only see a sliver of my surroundings and only when looking down towards my nose.

I want to look around and see if my gf Sarah is about to go down on me but I do t want her to think I’m awake so I stay still and wait. That’s when I hear the faintest whispering from the living room. Right away I remember that Kate is here so my head gets thrown into confusion

“Is my gf going to do this with her in the apartment?”

“Is Kate going to leave the apartment for a bit”

“Am I supposed to try to be quiet when I pretend to wake up”

A wave of confusion rushes over me as I’m trying to figure it out.

I can tell that there’s two sets of whispers so I know no one is in the bedroom. I take my chance to look around without my head making too much noise on the pillow. First thing I see is my dick has gone soft after the wave on confusion hit my brain. Second thing I see is that the bedroom door is wide open! This blows my mind. “How could Sarah leave the door open??? What if Kate saw me?” Nothing else in the room seems off so I lay there and wait.

I hear the front door open and then close so I think ok Kate is probably going on a walk for a bit. Ok everything makes sense to me now and I can relax and enjoy what my gf is about to do to me. I hear her walk into the bedroom and sit next to me on my right side. She grabs my still soft cock and starts playing with it and stroking it. My gf Sarah is also 5’4” with an athletic build just not as skinny as Kate. Sarah has very small hands so it feels amazing wrapped around my cock and makes it feel bigger than it actually is. It feels good but I’m debating internally when to stop fake sleeping.

She leans over from my right side and slowly puts the tip of my cock in her mouth. It feels amazing! The warmth and the wetness of her mouth. I can feel her lips wrapped around my head and her tongue slowly going back and forth. My dick gets bigger and bigger in her mouth. She moved her hand from the top by her mouth to the base of my cock and then puts all of me in her mouth. I let out a moan. The cover is blown now. She keeps going all the way up and down. I keep letting out soft moans and start wiggling my legs around a little. It feels amazing and I want more.

Now that she knows I’m awake I feel way more free to move around so I decide to try and watch her suck on my cock through the crack in my mask but she moves right before I could look. She put her left leg over me and when I look all I can see is smooth skin right in front of my face. She is in 69 position and I’m all about it. I can feel her feet on my arms which is how I found out she’s wearing pantyhose. Right away that turns me on even more as she plants her pussy right on my mouth. I get to work and start licking her up and down. Then flat tongue going side ways on her clit. While all of this is happening she’s sucking my dick like never before. It feels amazing.

Normally when my gf and I 69, she stops sucking me after a while and lets out a couple moans of pleasure from what I’m doing. This hasn’t happened as she keeps sucking. One hand holding the base and the other holding my balls. I feel like I’m going to cum soon it’s too good. My jaw starts getting sore so I switch to penetrating her with my tongue. I slid my tongue inside her and it doesn’t taste how it normally does. That’s confused me for a second but I think nothing of it and instead concentrate on how tight she feels around my tongue.

She stops sucking when I put my tongue in her and lets out a moan. Very hot but her moan immediately makes me question if this was really Sarah. Everything started to seem like it was connecting. The blowjob felt better than usual, her pussy tasted sweeter, her moan didn’t sound like Sarah’s normal moans, and now I feel like I can smell Kate’s hair. I don’t know if I’m overthinking it or if I’m just imaging/fantasizing that it is Kate and choose to ignore it for now while I’m eating her out.

She gets off me and goes to my nightstand that has condoms in it, pulls one out and puts it on me. I can see her hand putting it on but not much else. At this point I’m like 70% certain that this is Kate which has me going wild inside. And just the thought I might get to fuck her has sparks flying inside. She gets on me revers cowgirl about to slide my cock inside her and that’s when I get the best view. I see her ass hovering over my dick. I can see she’s wearing thigh highs that go up to the crevasse her ass makes on her thigh. They are so smooth and have a lace design at the top. I pan my view up and see Kate’s black hair up in a bun and her slim figure over me.

Before all the questions about how or why this is happening rush in she sits on my cock. No waiting or beating around the bush she shoves me inside of her like that’s the only thing that’s been on her mind for the past week. I can feel her pussy gripped around my cock. She’s so tight, tighter than my gf. It’s very warm and wet. She’s so wet it slid in no problem. We both let out a moan as we were sharing this amazing feeling together. I can’t stop looking at her ass planted on me. Her body is amazing and I want her. I feel her lean forward and grab my ankles. She starts riding me like the good girl she is. A perfect tempo not too slow or too fast. I’m watching her dripping from her pussy as my cock keeps sliding in and out. Her moans alone would be enough to make me cum. She sounds so sexy and I love knowing that she’s enjoying it.

I keep moaning too and start talking dirty to her. I tell her to keep going just like that. Just like the good little slut she is. She loves it and moans louder and louder. I keep telling her she’s my good girl. I want to break these arm restraints more than I’ve ever wanted anything. I want to grab her ass and waist and take control but I can’t. She has all the control right now. Her moans get louder and longer which make me go crazy. Her pussy sliding up and down my cock has brought me to my limit. I can’t possibly hold it in anymore no matter how hard I try. And I dont want to. I don’t want to try to think about something not sexy to delay it. I want to stare at her ass bouncing on my cock when I come. Where I am is where I want to be. I tell her I’m about to come and she doesn’t change anything. She doesn’t stop or speed up she just keeps going and says “cum in me daddy”

I cum so hard inside of her and she stops riding. She’s sitting all the way down on me letting my cock reach the deepest part of her as it pulses and pulses spewing cum out. She’s breathing hard and asks “did you like that?” I say “fuck, that was amazing”

I don’t know if she has given up on trying to be discrete about not being my gf or just got too caught up in how good everything felt bc she was talking. Saying dirty things like cum in me and did you like that. Before I could dive into deeper thinking about this situation she gets off me and turns around. She still straddling me just facing towards me now. I’m too scared to look through my mask bc idk what would happen if she found out I could partially see. I feel her scoot up my body. She hovers her pussy over my face and adjusts her legs. She slides her feet under my shoulders and grabs my hair with both hands careful not to move my mask.

She doesn’t want any teasing or slow play at all, Kate put her pussy right on my mouth as I stuck out my tongue and started grinding on it. Moving her hips forward and back gliding her clit on my flat tongue. She let out soft moans and a sighed “fuck” a couple times but this time as if she was holding it back realizing she shouldn’t be talking.

She stops moving and lets me do all the work. I suck on it a little bit and then start going sideways with my tongue flat on her. I can tell that’s what feels best for her bc of her moans and body movement. I switch to a circular motion and that was the golden ticket. She moans so loud without caring who can hear. Her lags clasp around my head and I can feel them shivering. She keeps shivering and moaning for a bit and is pushing my head away from her pussy because I’m assuming she doesn’t have the strength in her legs to lift herself up. Finally she calms down and lays next to me with her arm and leg draped over me.

I can see her leg over my stomach. Her smooth sexy leg in thigh highs. I wish I could use my hands and feel her. Feel her entire body. She leans over me and starts kissing me. Another dead giveaway that she isn’t my gf. Her making out is way different. She stops and I catch a glimpse of over her breasts. They are unbelievable. Bigger than Sarah’s and more rounded. I could see a small freckle on her chest too which was very attractive to me. I wanted to grab them and lick them so bad. She’s made me so horny I’m ready for round two but she gets up and I can hear her go into the bathroom.

I hear a flush and the sink. Then after a minute she comes out and takes off my condom. She has a rag and starts cleaning me up. I can see she has changed into a normal shirt and short shorts. She finishes cleaning me up and sits in between my legs. She starts slowly stroking me with her left hand while what looks like texting in her right hand. I’m rock hard now wanting more of her. She pauses for a couple seconds with her hand at the base of my cock a couple times. The she does the same thing but this time with her sucking on the head of my cock. I can see what she’s doing. She’s taking selfies with my cock in her mouth. I realize she was taking pictures of it before the selfies too. This just made me hornier. The thought of her doing that seemed sexy to me.

She then walks into the living room after closing the bedroom door. I’m left laying there wanting more and also so content with the most amazing but of my life. After a while I hear the front door open followed by some whispers and quiet giggles. The bedroom door opens and my mask comes off. It’s Sarah and she started undoing my restraints. She says “did you like that? Did it feel good?” I tell her yes and ask if she did too. She said yes and told me that Kate just got back from the gas station down the road and told me to clean up and get dressed quietly as to not leave clues to Kate what happened.

I agree a see the picture now. I’m guessing it was preplanned that Sarah was to let Kate fuck me under the condition I didn’t know it was Kate but cmon it was so obvious. 100% no doubt in my mind that was Kate and it was so lousy how they tried to hide that. I’m sure even Kate knew she had given away her identity multiple times and I’m sure Sarah knew there was no way I wouldn’t figure it out but whatever I’ll play along I guess.

I go to the living room and we all hang out like we don’t all know what just happened. Kate and I keep looking at each other pretty flirty and now I can’t stop imaging her naked and wanting to rail her on my bed. Kate and my gf went out to a cafe and now you’re caught up to the present.

I don’t know if I should tell Sarah that I know about everything that happened and ask her a ton of “why” questions or just keep everything to myself. I want to tell her so I can ask why she was fine with it after telling me she wouldn’t want a 3some with me and her friends but I also want to not say anything because I love the taboo feeling. I also do t know if I should confront Kate about it or not. I don’t know if that would be out of Sarah’s boundaries or not. I also really want to ask Kate how the pictures turned out to see how flustered I can get her.

Any advice is welcome and appreciated as I have no idea what to do or how to play this situation. Thanks for reading and sorry if it was too long or if there were any errors. I didn’t proof read.

[avocad1s]

Bring Back What Once Was Mine

Chapter Summary: The nation of Cryo welcomes you.

Characters Mentioned: The Fatui Harbingers & The Tsaritsa.

Content Warning: Cult and Religious themes ahead! You've been warned.

Reader is the true creator of Teyvat. GN! Reader

Part Four Part Five (you are here!) Part Six

You alr know what I’m gonna say… not beta read :>

The Gnosis didn’t just connect the Archons to the Creator. It also connected them to Celestia.

Although very few understand it, one thing that is known is Celestia is the residence for the Gods. On rare occasions, mortals can ascend to Celestia if they preform great, heroic feats. Meaning even humans can achieve godhood.

However as the decades went by, the Archons begin cutting of their ties to Celestia after the Cataclysm. They decided to live in their respective nations rather than watching them from above.

Celestia, who noticed the reservations of the Seven, knew that it had to do something to keep its order intact.

“You’re Grace?”

“Hmm?”

“You should put your coat on now, we will be arriving on shore soon.”

A few hours has passed since you had made a detour in your journey gotten a on the boat with Childe, he was a talkative individual, boasting about his skills in combat or about the Tsaritsa. Yet when you asked about the other Harbingers he wouldn’t say much, he would vaguely mention something about their strength or their contribution to the Fatui.

Speaking of the Fatui, you still had your reservations about the infamous group. Though when you try to reassure yourself that you know the Cryo Archon better than anyone else, Aether’s words fills your ears.

You sigh slipping the soft material of the coat onto your arms, feeling your body instantly heat up.

“Lord Harbinger,” one of Childe’s soldiers approached the two of you in a stiff bow. “We have arrived.”

Just like with Sumeru, it seems the Snezhnaya had changed a great deal since the last time you were here. You could hardly believe that this nation had been on lock for many years.

Childe holds his hand out to you, “I’ll lead you, Your Grace.” You rest your hand in his gloved one causing him to smile wider as he leads off the boat onto the icy deck.

The deck and the pathway leading to the Zapolyarny palace has a scare amount of security. You couldn’t help but wonder if it was on purpose or if your arrival to Snezhnaya is unexpectedly early.

“Are you nervous, Your Grace?” Childe asks suddenly.

You swallow, could he feel your apprehension? As the two of you get closer to the Zapolyarny palace, you could feel the tension in your body increase. The overwhelming presence of malice the palace was giving off, you could only imagine who- or what- was in there.

He gives your hand a slight squeeze looking over at you, “there’s no need to be nervous, the Fatui and Her Majesty are your most loyal servants. We will never do anything to betray you.”

Nodding at his words, you try to ignore the goosebumps that just appeared on your skin.

Childe pushes open the large doors leading you inside the icy fortress. Even though it wasn’t very well lit, the decor in the inside was spectacular. Multiple banners hung from the support beams all of them with snowflakes decorated at the bottom of it. There were also dozens of pews that lead to the front of the room which seemed to be the most lit. Many soldiers stood near the wall gawking in your direction once you entered the palace, but with a simple glance, you could tell they were lower ranked. Not because of anything they were wearing, but because of the two who stood in front of you.

One you recognized to be the Cryo Archon but the other was someone you’ve never seen before. Both were all dressed nicely but still kept the cold weather in mind.

The Tsaritsa was the only one to approach you, she wasted no time grabbing your free hand with both of hers. “Your Grace please forgive me for my rude welcoming. If I had known you would arrive today-“

“You have no reason to apologize, I wish I was here under better circumstances…” you interrupt.

She lets go of your hand nodding, “having you here already means everything to me.”

You smile at her sweet words, the Tsaritsa was still the same as you remembered. Maybe letting the words of Yelan and Aether get to you was a bad idea.

“You must tired after your journey.” The Tsaritsa begins, “we’ve prepared a room just for you. I hope it’s to your liking.”

Truthfully, you would take any bed right now. Ever since you descended to Teyvat, you’ve been sleeping outside or not sleeping at all, you wouldn’t complain about any accommodations right now.

She looks back at the man who was watching your interaction, “my most trusted will guide you to your chamber. I will come check on you later.”

The Tsaritsa takes a step away from you, turning her attention to Childe who was still holding your hand. “Come with me Tartaglia,” she orders.

Childe hesitantly lets go of your hand giving you a reassuring smile, “don’t worry Your Grace, if you need anything from me, I’ll still be in the palace.”

It fell silent for a moment in the palace, only thing that could be heard is the faint footsteps of Childe and the Cryo Archon walking off as they whisper about something you couldn’t make out.

“Divine One…”

You focus your attention on the man in front of you. He had on a mask like the soldiers in the room with you but his only covered half of his face, his hair is white and his eyes… (or eye) were the most peculiar. It was definitely something you recognized but he was standing to far away for you to make out what it was exactly.

“My name is Pierro,” he introduces, “I will guide you to your chamber.”

So this was the Tsaritsa most trusted. It makes you wonder how long he’s been in the Fatui to earn such a title. He leads you down a hall in the opposite direction that the Tsaritsa had went, he doesn’t say anything keeping his gaze forward and his hands behind his back.

“Where are the others?” You ask breaking the silence.

He glances at you for a moment, “I’m assuming you mean the other Harbingers? They’ll be returning soon.”

Pierro stops in front of a double doored room at the end of the hall, “this is where you’ll be staying while in Snezhnaya, Divine One.” He opens the door for you allowing you to walk inside as he stands by the threshold.

The room was fairly dark, the only light coming from the fireplace on the furthest wall from the door. There was one large bed in the middle of the room and a couch by the fireplace. There was also a table with a few books neatly stacked on it.

“I hope you enjoy your time in the Zapolyarny Palace.” Pierro closes the door leaving you alone in the large room.

Once the door clicks, you pull the flower Aether had given you out of your pocket inspecting it closely. Luckily it hadn’t wilted while on your journey to Snezhnaya. You place the flower on the table shrugging off your coat draping it on the chair. You relax into the couch allowing the fireplace to keep you warm, unaware that this is the last time you’ll relax before knowing the truth yourself.

-

-

The Zapolyarny palace was more comforting than you thought it be.

Slouching on this couch has to be the first time you ever allowed yourself to fully relax since you descended to Teyvat. You didn’t even realized you were succumbing to sleep until you heard faint voices outside your door that brought your attention back to reality.

“Is their Grace really behind this door?”

“That’s what the Jester said, maybe I should bring them something to eat.”

“Why should it be you? Their Grace knows me, they’ll be more comfortable if I bring it to them.”

“It shouldn’t have been you who found them in the first place, Tartaglia. I’m higher ranked than you, it should be me who gives it to them.”

“Well if it’s purely based off our rankings than it should be me, no? I am the highest ranked out of us all since number one isn’t here.”

“You’d just scare them off Dottore!”

Their fighting immediately ceases causing you to sit up on the couch. We’re they aware you were listening or did they walk off to argue somewhere else. Neither answer made sense, you hadn’t made a noise since you noticed they were outside your door and you didn’t hear their footsteps or fading voices indicating that they walked off.

A soft knock is heard at the large doors.

“Your Grace,” a voice calls out. It was the Tsaritsa, “are you awake? May I come inside?”

You use your palms to straighten out your wrinkled clothing before answering, “yes I’m awake. Please come in.”

The door opens immediately and the Cryo Archon walks inside closing the door behind her.

“We’re you able to settle in?”

You nod, “yes! This room is perfect, thank you.”

“I’m glad…” she slowly approaches you on the coach before hesitantly sitting next to you. “Well there’s no point of beating around the bush… I’m assuming you know why I came to see you?”

You rest your hands in your lap giving her your full attention, “it’s about the False Creator. Right?”

“Yes.” She confirms, “Tartaglia wasn’t lying when he said that I’ve figured out where the False Creator came from.”

You say nothing waiting for her to continue and after a best of silence she says, “Your Grace, there’s a reason why none of the Archons were alerted to your presence. We all removed our Gnosis.”

Your eyes widen, “what? Why?”

“It’s not because of you!” She quickly reassures, “we all still hold you in the highest regard, but to be connected to you we also have to be connected to…”

“…Celestia…” you finish her sentence. “Is there something wrong with Celestia? Why don’t you all want to be connected to it anymore?”

She brushes some of her hair off her shoulder, “when you went off world centuries ago and left Celestia in control of Teyvat, something changed.”

“What do you mean?” You ask.

She shrugs, “I’m not entirely sure what happened but once you left, being in Celestia felt… wrong. Like none of us were supposed to be there but it was Celestia’s final order that made us cut our connection to it.”

“Celestia’s final order?”

“What I’m trying to tell you is that Celestia had ordered us Archons to destroy Khaenri'ah under the guise that it was you who told us to.”

Once she had seen your face, it takes everything out of the Tsaritsa not to fall onto the floor and beg for your forgiveness, but telling you everything is whats important right now, even if you do hate her afterwards.

“We all thought it was you who told us to do it… and that’s when the other one had arrived. Pretending to be you, they reassured us that we did the right thing and that we had gotten rid of a nation filled with sinners.”

You notice her eyes fill with tears, she felt true guilt for what she and her fellow Archons had done. Reaching out, you place your hand on top of her silently urging her to continue.

“Celestia feared it was losing it’s control over Teyvat after us Archons stopped going there once you had departed. So it sent down a fake you to keep the control it had over the world. With the False Creator and the Gnosis, Celestia had Teyvat right in the palm of it’s hands.”

“Wait.” You interrupt, “if that’s all they did, then why was Khaenri'ah destroyed?”

You feel her hands trembling under yours, but before you can comment on it she continues. “Khaenri'ah had found out about Celestia’s plans to send down a False Creator. When Khaenri'ah had made plans to summon you, Celestia ordered the destruction of the nation. It’s what we call the Cataclysm.”

You remove your hand from hers bringing them up to your mouth. There’s no way she was actually telling the truth, Celestia had existed way before anyone on Teyvat did. It was one of your first creations, would it really betray you like that?

A cold hand on your cheek breaks you out of your thoughts, the Tsaritsa turns your head to look at her a frown apparent on her face.

“I know how this sounds your Grace but you must believe me. I would never tell you such a blasphemous lie if it weren’t the truth!”

“What were these plans Khaenri'ah had found?” Are the only words to leave your lips.

“A prototype.” She explains, “they had sent down a prototype to see if they could fool Khaenri'ah into believing it was actually you. Celestia knew that convincing that nation would be the hardest since it was the only nation without an Archon.”

You stand from your spot on the couch causing the Tsaritsa to jump up as well, her face looked frantic but she held her composure well. It was clear where the Fatui had gotten their cold nature from.

“And how exactly did you get all of this information?”

“There are many remnants of Khaenri'ah still around Teyvat Your Grace. Celestia wasn’t able to eradicate everything.” She explains.

There was a another silence between the two of you but it wasn’t like before, this time it felt suffocating. If what she claims is the truth that means your own creation, something you believed you could trust, had betrayed you. Now everything made sense. Everything Aether had told you about the remnants of Khaenri'ah still being present. He was there, he probably seen all of it.

You should’ve went with him when you had the chance. Outlander or not, you were conflicted on who you could trust now.

“Your Grace?” the Cryo Archon stutters out her hand resting gently on your shoulder. “What are you going to do now?”

You decide not to respond but her question continues to repeat in your mind. What are you going to do? If it was Celestia, then destroying the Imposter wouldn’t solve your problem. What if you decide to go off world again? Would Celestia just make another Fake Creator and take reign over your world once more? You couldn’t let that happen, it wasn’t a risk you were willing to take.

“As unbelievable everything you just told me sounds, I’m going to trust you…”

Her body visibly relaxes at your explanation.

“Even though I still don’t know everything I wanted, if Celestia was the one who created the Imposter then I cannot waste anymore time. I must return to Sumeru and deal with them immediately.”

-

-

Note: I apologize for the five day wait, but this part took a lot of research on my end and yeah 💀 i already know there are some inaccuracies but for the sake of the plot idc. Anyways we have just reached the climax of the story, my plan is to wrap everything up in three more chapters but we’ll see how that turns out.

Taglist: @esthelily @the-dumber-scaramouche @grimreapersscythe @seawater-aurelia-writing @probablynoposts @genshin-impacts-me @itsredactedlove @chidouna @thedevioussmirk @hoo-hoo @chaoticfivesworld @akemiixx01 @lunarapple @nowords-onlybreathing @fangirlinindia @veyu002 @blackcoffex @kaveh-is-pretty @ariasdream @averycuriousperson @bloopthebat @chuuya-brainrot @crazydreamcat @sparklyphantom @multistanbee @bluebelony @mokakoto @mega-trash-cringe CLOSED

I apologize to anyone who has asked to be tagged over the past few days! Please know that I did see you but Tumblr is not allowing me to add anyone else to the Taglist :<

Also this blog has hit 200 followers in under two weeks… umm HELLO? where did all of you come from?!? Seriously though, I appreciate all of the love and support you all have given this story 🙏 I love you all platonically ofc !!!

[seeingivy]

you belong with me

satoru gojo x f!reader

**part of my satoru as taylor swift songs series

content: high school!au, gojo is a robotics nerd, reader is class president, emo nanami (my beloved), toji is ur shitass football playing boyfriend, typical cheesy highschool drama

an: tell me why posting this is giving me a tummy ache like I haven't posted for gojo in forever and now i think I suck at it :OOO anyways, please be nice to me about this and close your eyes if you hate it. also, totally reliving my high school days when I was senior class vice president (worst experience of my life) FDLJFKDSJFLS

--

You’re a hater. A self proclaimed, real-life, deep in your soul hater. 

What do you hate today? Being class president. 

You hate that you willingly ran, somehow won, had people up your ass all day about stuff that wasn’t in your control, and got stuck in the current situation you were in. Which was arguing with your boyfriend Toji, as you pace around your room and do your own fair share of screaming back. 

“You just did that shit because you were pissed at me.” 

“I did not, Toji. You know, not everything is about you. Other people needed the money and I put it where it was needed.” 

“To the color guard team? Babe, no one gives a fuck about the color guard team. Everyone is at the homecoming game to watch the football team. Not a bunch of idiots waving flags in the air.” 

“They’re also part of the game and all their equipment is broken. They need it more than you when you guys literally get donors and funding from the district and-”

“You’re just pissed about the sweetheart thing. That’s why you’re doing this shit and taking it out on everyone else.” 

“Toji, I’m not even mad about-” 

You’re met with the sound of ringing over the phone, signaling that Toji had enough and finally hung up on you. You flop straight onto your bed, pushing your face so hard into your pillow that sits uncomfortably against your nose and the smell of your laundry detergent makes its way to the crevices of your brain.

You hear a banging behind you and twist around to see Gojo pointing at his walkie-talkie, switching it on as you reach for yours. It’s still covered in glittery pink stickers from when you were seven, the silver coming off on your hand every time you grab it. 

“Come in, bunny.” 

“Loud and clear, Toru.” 

He smiles, setting his hardware down - probably for another weird ass robot he was making - as he holds it up to his face, talking again. 

“You okay?” 

“Yeah. Just arguing with Toji, again. I’ll start allocating some of our funds to get you some sound proof windows.” 

“Much appreciated, Madam President. That’s very generous of you.” 

You laugh, dropping the walkie talkie to lift your fingertips to your temples, lightly massaging the pulsating under your skin. 

“For what it’s worth, the color guard team is really grateful you did that for them. I know Utahime was so excited when the new flags came in, she was flipping them around on the field for hours.” 

“That’s why it’s even more annoying. I know what I did was right, but he just doesn’t see it that way. Uta dragged me down to the field to watch them and their choreography looks so much better with the multicolored flags. They were really happy about it.” 

“Heavy is the head that wears the crown?” 

“Heavy is the head that’s dating Toji Fushiguro.” 

He laughs as you switch your channel off, taking the last few seconds to study you before you draw your curtains. He can see the tension sitting in your shoulders and how clearly it hurts you to argue with Toji like this. And it infuriates him. That you even have to go to sleep angry and that the cause is the headass idiot you’re dating. 

Toji Fushiguro is lucky, far more lucky than he realizes. Not for obvious reasons. Yeah, he’s a great football player and yeah, he’ll probably get scouted for some really good university at the end of the year. He doesn’t have a shortage of friends or intelligence and for all intents and purposes, he’s loved (which Gojo doesn’t understand at all). 

He’ll probably be that scumbag that people see a few years down the line and then get infuriated at. Because if an absolute asshat like Toji Fushiguro can be successful, then truly all things have gone to shit. That the patriarchy is real, that society is broken, living proof that the asshole always wins and everyone else always loses. 

But no, those are common reasons to hate Toji Fushiguro - ones he’s heard echoed by Suguru and Shoko every time he does something that pisses the two of them off. Like scream obscenities in the hallways, block their parking spots when they’re going to class, call them names when they walk by. 

No. Toji Fushiguro is lucky because he gets to date you. Because out of the long list of girls he had to pick one, Toji just had to pick the one that was his. The girl he’s been in love with since he moved in right across the street and had a smiley neighbor excitedly waving at him through her bay window. 

To him, love has always been the pigtail braids you used to wear everyday in the fourth grade, the matching walkie-talkies you bought him in sixth grade when he got grounded, and that sweet smile you’ve had since the first day he’s met you. 

And when he sees those green curtains pulled against the bay window he’s stared at for years, where he’s loved you from for years, he lifts the walkie and says what he forgot to mention. 

I love you.

--

Thanks to your gracious ride, you make it to school thirty minutes early. Your intuition - that Toji was ditching you as your ride to school this morning - was correct. Luckily, you made it in time just before class started. 

Nanami’s already seated on the green bench outside the classroom, headphones plugged into his ears. As you walk up, you silently wonder how much hair gel it takes to keep his Gerard Way hairstyle in place. 

“Hi Kento! How is my best friend doing on this fine morning?” 

“We’re not best friends.” 

“Sure we are!” 

You reach forward and pinch his cheek in your hand, which he only swats off and rolls his eyes at. That’s how you know your best friends. Because if it was anyone else, Nanami would probably break their hand and walk away. But he always lets you tease him, because he know he loves you. 

“Are you still fighting with that dog?” 

“That dog has a name. And it’s Toji. And I’m not sure, he didn’t pick me up for school this morning.” 

“Did he at least tell you he wouldn’t?” 

“No. I was lucky enough that Satoru had walked Megs to the bus stop a little late and I was able to get a ride with him.” 

Nanami looks over, narrowing his eyes at you, as the hallway starts getting crowded with people. And you know what he’s saying, what he’s been saying for the past few months. 

“You know, it’s very normal to give your neighbor a ride when they need one. Not everything has ulterior motives, Kento.” 

“That’s true. Everything doesn’t have ulterior motives. But he does. I’ve seen how he looks at you.”

“How does he look at me, Kento?” 

“Like he’d kiss the ground you’d walk on.” 

You roll your eyes, reaching up to mess up his perfectly styled hair. It doesn’t budge and you get a handful of minty smelling hair gel.

“As if.”

Like you’ve summoned him by bringing him up, Satoru’s sidestepping to where you and Nanami are sitting, Shoko and Getou in tow with him. 

“Nanami~~ How’s my best friend doing?” Satoru says, bending over to totally obscure Nanami’s line of vision.

“Shut the fuck up, Gojo.” Nanami responds. 

Nanami stands up, giving you a look, before he stalks away to his next class. Leaving you, Satoru, Shoko, and Getou standing in front of your classroom.  

“So. I hear you have a robotics competition?” you ask.

“Yeah. Next Saturday. We always practice our hardware out the night before, throw a little party in the lab. You should come.” Getou says, smiling at you. 

Satoru smacks Getou in the stomach right after he invites you, clearly trying to tell him something with his eyes. And then when he catches you staring, he gives you a nervous laugh. 

You get it. He doesn’t want you there.

“Don’t act too excited to see me now, Satoru. Anything more and I might think you like me.” you bite sarcastically.

“What? No, it’s not like that. I just-” Satoru stutters, 

“So you don’t like me?” you say, smirking at him. Shoko and Getou are laughing, the tips of Satoru’s turning pink as he very adamantly tells you that he does indeed like you. 

“I have stuff to set up for the homecoming game that day, so I won’t be able to. But I’ll try my best, yeah?” 

“Okay. Next time?” Getou asks. 

“Sure, Sugar-u. I’ll see you guys around, yeah?” 

You give the three of them a polite smile as you trudge away, leaving to meet Toji at his locker and give him a piece of your mind for this morning. Which leaves Shoko and Getou to give Satoru the scolding of his life. 

“Are you fucking stupid, Satoru? You made it seem like you didn’t want her there.” Shoko says, smacking him on the back of the head. 

“I panicked! Plus, Haibara always likes to play Just Dance and I’d rather not embarrass myself in front of her.” Satoru responds, rubbing the now sore spot on the back of his head. 

“You’re hopeless, Satoru. She’s never going to like you if you keep rejecting her the way you do.” Suguru says, dragging him along to the robotics lab. 

“She has a boyfriend. Who isn’t me. As if she would even consider dating me in the first place.” 

And when the three of them pass you by the lockers, clearly getting yelled at by Toji, it only furthers their argument more. 

“Yeah, I’m sure she really loves him, Satoru.” 

--

Your argument with Toji hours prior simmers in your head, as you wait for the bus to arrive and for this godforsaken day to finally be over. You watch him pile into his car with Salma and the other boys from the football team, which only makes your anger fester more. 

He’s doing this to piss you off. Of course, he’s doing this to-

“Need a ride?” 

You look up and unclench your fists to find Satoru, sparkly blue eyes shining at you and a hand held out to you. 

“Thanks.” 

He leads you to his car, an almost demolished Honda Civic from his maniacal driving, and you climb in, immediately putting your head in your hands. You can feel him moving around you, the engine purring on and him backing out of the spot. 

“About earlier. I don’t not want you to come to the robotics thing. I just thought it was awkward the way he asked you and I-I didn’t want you to feel obligated to come, you know? And I-I’d like it if you came too and so would the rest of us.” he rambles, a hand in his hair. 

You look up, his ears tinted pink from the confession. 

“I was just teasing you, Satoru. I’ll try to make it by, okay?” 

He sighs, a clear breath of relief, and looks over to smile.

“Okay, cool cool cool. Now tell me why you and Toji are fighting.” 

“When aren’t we fighting?” you murmur, pressing your head against the glass. 

“But why?” 

And when you look over, his blue eyes staring into yours, in earnest while the light is red, you unload it all. 

“Do you know about the sweethearts thing they do at the homecoming game?” 

“Uh. That’s when the cheerleaders wear the jerseys right. And then decorate the locker room or some shit for the players.” 

“Yeah. Well, it’s not limited to cheerleaders. It usually is, but if you’re dating someone, that person can do it for you.” 

“So I’m guessing Toji doesn’t want you to do it for him.” 

“Not exactly. He was just saying that it’s more traditional for a cheerleader to do it since they’re also on the side of the track and he wants to see his name out there instead of running around, trying to make sure the game is running and all that.” 

You slump into the chair as Satoru frowns, a pitying look in his eyes, as he keeps driving. You can’t help but watch him, his silhouette against the window - defined jaw, the slope of his nose. 

He’s not the guy who ran away from kissing you in the eighth grade. He’s just ten times hotter. 

You shake your head, letting the thought spill from your mind, as Satoru looks over. 

“Jamoca?” he says, giving you a wide grin. 

You can’t help but laugh, nodding as Satoru makes a sharp left turn, making his way to the ice cream shop. 

Jamoca is your favorite ice cream flavor. Coffee, layered with fudge and almonds, became a proclaimed favorite when Satoru dragged you once in the sixth grade. After very sorely losing the class president battle, you moped in your room for five days - even going as far as borrowing one of Nanami’s My Chemical Romance vinyls to truly and properly mope. 

On day three of blasting the vinyl, Satoru called enough and dragged you to the closest ice cream store, claiming it was the closest thing to therapy that you normies could afford. Since then, any bad day was easily solved with two things. 

Jamoca and Satoru. 

When you make it to the store, Satoru’s excitedly dragging you out of the car, his hand pressed in yours as you both run into the store, giggling while you order your single scoops. And when he drags you out to the curb and you sit there, you silently think to yourself why you ever stopped doing this in the first place. 

Satoru leans over, digging his chocolate fudge covered spoon into your cup, before talking. 

“So. If you guys fight so much, why are you still dating?” 

“Dunno. Feels weird to initiate a breakup, I guess. I can’t see myself doing it.” 

“Even when he wants other girls to be his sweetheart?” 

“Even when he wants other girls to be his sweetheart.” 

You kick the pebbles into the broken parts of the pavement, leaning your elbows on your knees. 

“I don’t know, Toru. I guess he was just the first guy who ever liked me back and then I….spent so much time in the relationship and trying to make it work that it feels weird to let it go now.” 

Satoru swallows hard, eyeing his melting ice cream, as he ponders the best response. Because in earnest, he has two options. Support you or be selfish. Support you to stay with Toji, to do what you’ve been doing because he knows it’s what you want. Or be selfish. Tell you that he you deserve better, that he could be that for you if you just let him. 

He reaches over, flicking you in the forehead. 

“Ouch, asshole.” 

“You’ve got a really big brain in there. And you always have. You’ll figure out the right thing to do, just give it time.” 

And when you give him a halfhearted smile, reaching over into his cup for a bite of his ice cream, he lets it go. 

He can’t be selfish. Not when it comes to you anyways. 

--

After running around all day, you give yourself thirty minutes to go to Satoru’s robotics thing. After triple checking the microphones work, the yearbook team has access to the field, the glitter has been set out for everyone trickling in, and that everyone who could possibly need your phone number has it, you speed run to the other side of campus, to the robotics lab. 

And when you make it, the five of them - Haibara, Nanami, Shoko, Getou, and Satoru - are in the room playing Just Dance. Shoko’s sitting on top of the desk, flippantly moving her remote in the air, while Satoru quite literally is trying to give it all he’s got - and losing apparently. 

You lightly push the door open, which stops the two of them in their tracks, and you’re met with some very excited cheers as they all drag you into the room. You take a seat next to Nanami, giving his cheek a pinch, which he hates. 

“You’re Haibara, right?” 

“You know who I am?” 

“Why wouldn’t I? You’re friends with Nanami and Nanami and I are best friends.” 

“No we aren’t.” responds Nanami, now sulking two seats away from you. 

“Are too.” 

You throw the nearest object, a pencil at Nanami, as you turn back to Haibara and laugh. 

“I like your shirt. Flight of the Navigator is a really good movie.” 

You see Satoru, Shoko, and Suguru’s eyes widen in the back at your words and hear a considerable amount of groaning from Nanami behind you. And after twenty minutes, you find out why. 

Haibara really, really loves Flight of the Navigator. Almost too much. In earnest, you barely remember the movie - at most, maybe the weird little alien companion he has. But here Haibara is, reciting the cast, the directors, acting out the scenes and it’s clear to you that you’ve tapped into some monster they all keep hidden. 

Luckily for you, Satoru comes to your rescue. 

“Okay, Haibara. I’m going to steal her for you for some Just Dance.” 

“I don’t Just Dance Satoru.” 

“Oh yeah? You’re just saying that because you know you’re going to lose.” 

You scoff, knowing exactly what he’s doing. 

“As if, sweetheart. I distinctly remember you banning us from ever playing that game together after I beat you in the fifth grade.” 

“You’re rusty. Maybe we’ll start with something easy. Like Rasputin.” 

“I could do Rasputin in my sleep, bitch.” 

“Prove it.” 

You roll your eyes as you march over to the front, where they’re projecting the game onto the screen. And just for posterity’s sake, you take Satoru’s sunglasses from where they were flipped over on the desk and put them on, effectively blinding yourself from the screen. 

And when the songs start, you can hear them all laughing behind you, Satoru and you hurling insults at each other as you dance on. And somewhere around the middle, you’re sure Satoru must be losing because he grabs your hands and suddenly he’s swinging you around in the air, his hands on your waist as you laugh. 

And when you take your blindfold off and the song dies down, Satoru wins by five points. 

“You asshole. You literally cheated, Satoru.” 

“Did not. You’re just a sore loser, bitch.” 

“You kiss your mom with that mouth?” 

“Every night, sweetheart.” 

You put the palm of your hand in his face as you push him away, moving to sit on the desk. He joins you, the two of you now watching Haibara and Nanami have a very one sided dance battle. 

After forty-five minutes, Satoru’s phone buzzes three times and the smile on his face drops when he checks. You place your hand on his, squeezing twice before asking. 

“You okay?” 

“Huh. Oh, yeah. I-I think you should go to the field. Right now.” 

“Wait, what? But you hate that kind of-” 

He grabs your hand, dragging you out, as you both start running to the field. You keep asking as he pulls you on, getting almost no response and only a faster pace. 

And when you reach the field, you catch just the end of it and the only thing grounding you to that moment is Satoru and Utahime, who was surely the one who had texted Satoru, holding onto your shoulders. 

Salma, the cheerleader Toji picked to be his sweetheart, just asked him to homecoming during halftime. And he said yes. 

Utahime squeezes your hand three times, a soft look in her eyes when she talks. 

“I’m so sorry, Y/N. I just thought you would want to know and I wanted to tell you because you’ve been nothing but nice to me.” 

You smile, moving into her open arms as you whisper a small thank you into her shoulder. She leaves, having to return to the color guard team waiting for her on the side, leaving you and Satoru standing on the pavement right by the field. 

“Take you home?” 

“Thanks, Toru.” 

“You want Jamoca?” 

“Not today.” 

He nods, a hand on the small of your back, as he leads you to his car, even going as far as opening the door for you and letting you crack the windows while you drive back - which you know he hates. 

At the first red light, he taps on the top of your head to get your attention. 

“Penny for your thoughts?” 

“Do you think there’s something wrong with me?” 

“What? Of course, not. Toji is just an asshat who doesn’t see you for what you’re worth and-” 

“No. No, no. Not like that. Do you think there’s something wrong with me because I’m not even the tiniest bit sad right now? I’m…relieved.” 

Satoru looks over, the red front the traffic light flashing on your face, and a blank expression staring back at him. 

“Of course, not. He’s a grade one idiot. Anyone in your position would feel that way, bunny.” 

“I know. That’s true.” 

“But?” 

“Does this make me defective, Satoru? Like, maybe I just can’t like people that much or something and I was the problem.” 

Satoru twiddles his thumbs on the steering wheel, pondering the same question he has been asking for the past few days. Encourage her or be selfish. 

He can’t be selfish with you. 

“Okay, Y/N. Close your eyes.” 

“Huh?” 

“Just do it.” 

“Okay.” 

He looks over, to find you eyelids fluttering shut, your face lit up by the streetlights outside.

“Now. Tell me about your dream guy, bunny.” 

“What are you going on ab-” 

“Just do it.” 

You sigh, before thinking hard about his question. 

“Someone I can be comfortable with. That’s my type. Like we can have fun together and play games but also being around them is comforting to me. Things might suck, but at least they are there to kind of pick me up at the end of the day. They’re nice to people and are surrounded by good company, because you are who you love and they try to be better each day.” 

After finishing, you open your eyes to find Satoru staring at you, an all-knowing look on his face. 

“Bunny?” 

“Toru?” 

“Does that sound anything like Toji to you?” 

You slump back into your chair, sinking down. 

“No.” you murmur. 

“You aren’t defective. Well, maybe in the higher level cognitive thinking part because you clearly have some impaired decision making but-” 

“Hey. Don’t be rude, asshole.” 

“Get out of the car.” 

You crane your head out the window to see you’re in fact not at your house, but at the ice cream store. And when he comes around to your side of the car, opening your door, he drags you out, the two of you eating you ice cream in the light of the dingy lamp outside the store. 

--

You knock hard on your window, only stopping when Satoru looks up from his desk, dropping the pencil he was just scribbling with. You point to your walkie talkie, switching on the channel as he grabs his. 

“Hi bunny. You look nice.” 

“Thank you. Are you coming tonight?” 

To homecoming. Because despite all odds and last night, you still have to go. And crown the homecoming king and queen since you’re the class president, which you’re sure will be Salma and Toji since the universe is very, very kind to you. 

“I’m sorry. Haibara needed help designing something for next week.” 

“Oh. Okay. I wish you were.” 

“I wish I was too. His hardware is Flight of the Navigator themed so wish me luck.” 

You laugh, giving him one last smile as he pulls the curtains to his window. And when you see his navy windows against the pane you’ve stared at him through for years, it only now occurs to you. 

When he asked you to describe that last night, he unlocked something. Bringing it to your attention, to the forefront of your mind. 

The person you were describing is him. You lift your walkie talkie to your mouth, press the button, and mention the words you forgot to say. 

I love you.

And then you turn on your heel and drive yourself to the dance. 

--

Satoru ponders it for thirty minutes. 

Support her or be selfish. Support her or be selfish. Support her or be selfish. 

Be fucking selfish. 

Satoru gets up, dropping the hardware he was making for Haibara, and pulls out the first suit he can find. He grabs his walkie talkie off his desk, convinces Megumi to go beg your mom (who loves Megumi) for your walkie talkie, and then goes ninety on the freeway to get to the school on time. 

He finds Nanami first, the glob of gel on his head somehow even worse than normal and sets his plan in motion. 

“Nanami.” 

“Please, for the love of god, not tod-” 

“Go hand this to Y/N.” 

Nanami and now Shoko are taking the walkie in their hands, flipping it over and inspecting it like they’re the fucking FBI. And more importantly, wasting time. 

Three feet away, you’re standing by the punch table, counting how many balloons are on the ceiling. You reach three hundred and fifteen when you’re approached for the first time that night, by Nanami and Shoko. 

“Nanami. What is going on with your hair? You can’t possibly need that much hair gel.”

“You would be shocked, Y/N.” 

“That's what I said to him too. But this is for you.” Shoko says.

She hands you your walkie talkie, the silver glitter coming off on your hand, as you flip it over. 

“Did you break into my house, Shoko?” 

“No. But I’m guessing Satoru did. He ran in here five minutes ago and basically yelled at us to give it to you.” 

They both shrug as they walk away and you look around, clutching the walkie talkie so hard in your hand you think you might break it. Satoru’s here.

And when you scan your eyes around the room, you see him at the front door, his eyes already fixed on yours. He’s smiling so big that it makes your heart squelch and suddenly you’re moving towards him. And as you both start walking (running) to each other, you can’t help but feel the anticipation of what’s coming. 

Except that’s right when Toji stands in the middle of the two of you, his characteristic slimy, sneer on his face. He reaches for your hand first. 

“Can we talk, Y/N?” 

"No."

You shrug your hand off, pushing right past him, as you walk closer to Satoru. You can hear Toji shouting something at you, but you’re too tunnel visioned on Satoru to pay attention. And when you reach him, you’re both smiling so big at each other, that it makes your face hurt. 

He lifts his walkie talkie to his mouth, talking first. 

“Come in, bunny?” 

“Loud and clear, Toru.” 

“I love you.” 

You can feel yourself smiling so big, so excited that you’re basically jumping on your toes, your walkie shaking in your hand. 

“I love you.” 

“Oh thank god. I was scared I was going to get a breaking and entering charge.”

You laugh, pulling him down by his tie and kissing him square on his face. And when he pulls away, ears pink and face red, you whisper against his lips. 

“It was always going to be you. I belong with you.” 

He smiles, that stupid smile you’ve stared at, loved for years and you can’t help but cheese, leaning forward to kiss him again.

--

the satoru as taylor swift songs series masterlist

taglist: @porridgesblog @platrom  @k0z3me  @kayleegomez  @yihona-san06  @bsenpai @sweetenertea  @skzismyhome  @mykyoon @violetmatcha @rebeccawinters  @luna0713hunter @shotenvinsoot @itzmeme @squirrelspoetry

[tomomiisasleep]

notes on Harryanthe which I am crazy about, in HtN

this dumb little interaction just stuck with me. I mean they're almost always high-strung in the detailed plot, like in almost every one of the Ianthe-centered scenes one of them is in some kind of pain

but I know they have chill moments. mundane moments. petty arguments, like the one in the post scrips of the letter. And I so badly want to read those!!

anyways. I'm gonna start collecting scraps here.

you might have given Ianthe Tridentarius the pleasure of opening the note labelled Upon the death of Harrowhark Nonagesimus. Your only hope for that note was that it contained a single sentence along the lines of, Get what joy you can from my corpse, you devious bitch, but it was written by a previous self and you could not risk a guess.

Harrow: what if I didnt hate her and that makes me wanna have a lobotomy yeah that makes sense

Once, vilely, from Ianthe; she had ensconced you in fat and rolled you down the hallway out of danger, and still laughed whenever she thought about it.

ok this is just Ianthe being a little pest, but it also means that she talks about this and laughs in Harrow's face, which makes her a little bitch, but also like it means they often chat and Ianthe would be like: Yeah today I tried the theorem on apples again, but I tweaked it by directing the flow of thalergy from- hey Harry do u remember the time I saved your life hahahahahaha

The mockery you endured for needing her proximity was exquisitely painful, but humiliation was steadily becoming your existence whole and entire.

I want to know what exactly this mockery entails

It had been very nicely matched to the original until she had ceased using it altogether, and the difference was more pronounced each day. Unconscious of your critical eye, she scratched fretfully at the line until red hives appeared.

Ianthe squirming under Harrow's gaze for once

She was in a filthy mood, if she was wearing that thing, with her arm exposed.

Harrow has been keeping tabs on the state of her arm problem ever since she first woke up on the Erobos. Same as how Ianthe has been keeping tabs on the results of her lobotomy.

she said, blue eyed, those oily little freckles glittering almost pinkly above the dress. They reflected the red rims of her eyelids. You thought that she had been crying.

yeah stare at her eyelids Harrow, and sniff her discreetly all the time, sweat musk vetiver am I right (also have I expressed how crazy it drives me that she wears masculine perfume??????????? no well IT'S SO *faints*

You got better autopsies of her encounters with Beasts than you did from your own, as Augustine was wont to explain significantly more to her than either he or Mercy did to you.

Ugh why why why in this whole book I have not seen them talk shop with each other even once??? Except Harrow showing off after making the arm. Harrow has discussions with Pal all the time in GtN. clearly she trades notes on necromancy with Ianthe frequently. but no, gloss over Ianthe's intellect and just write her freak(fond) moments

You had once been fool enough to recommend that Ianthe take them down, at which point she had rustled up another from the bathroom and hung it in pride of place above an overpainted dresser.

love her

“Oh, heaps,” said Ianthe, who appeared not to have taken offence at your rejection. It was so impossible to tell, with Ianthe. “I made it. It’s vile.”

Maybe she really doesn't care about the rejection or even likes it, but "so impossible to tell" kinda hints that, well she might be hurt,maybe, there just isn't any proof

It was not a connection formed of any mutual admiration; if anything, the more you saw of Ianthe the less likely you were to mistake her for likeable. She made herself like an overdecorated cake: covered so thickly in icing and fondants and gums that it would take serious excavation to find any bread. As a necromancer she was a genius, though you thought she relied too much on shortcuts and circumventions. She had an exceptionally fine mind. She was not afraid of rigour.

If Harrow doesn't have the hots for her at least I do.

Honestly on my first read I took stuff like "not likeable" and "“Tell me to stop breathing,” she said. (“I have, on multiple occasions,” you said.)" at face value and actually thought Harrow genuinely hates her and is forced to interact with her because there's no one else. Which is true. But she's also very attracted to her and I kinda overlooked it at because I thought those feelings were mutually exclusive. And they're not. which I'm obsessed with.

Or she won't think Ianthe's beautiful and note details about how she dresses all the time.

Seriously Harrow's special fixation on "how Ianthe's clothes make her look" is hard to ignore.

for example:

The mother-of-pearl made Ianthe’s hair a lurid yellow and threw up all the mustard tints of her skin; her face was blotchy, and her eyes were sleepless pits. She looked like shit.

The skirts and waists were all beautifully cut for someone of a different height and body type than Ianthe possessed. They were tight where they should have been loose and loose where they should have been tight. They looked like her burial clothes, and she looked as though she had emerged fifty years after that burial.

she answered after a long, scuffling minute, with sleep in her eyes and her hair in dilute whey tangles over her neck and shoulders, wearing a bewildering short garment of violet chiffon.

The back was open, and you could see the fine dents of her spine—her bleached skin bluer and sweeter against the pallid gossamer—and the twin blades of her shoulder blades looked strangely nude and vulnerable to you.

Ianthe was training in her nightgown—a grisly floor-length concoction of pale golden lace that made her long, limber body look like a green-veined mummy

a lone wax figure in pale purple chiffon, tall and colourless—except in the greasy metal of her bone arm, which the lights rendered all the colours of the rainbow.

Ianthe rose soundlessly to her feet, and the long skirts of her nightgown—a brilliant ruffled canary-yellow silk that made her look like a formal lemon—rustled restively around her calves.

Note that Harrow focuses on Ianthe's clothes for how they shape Ianthe's appearance. in contrast:

she ignored your sister, whose pallid eyebrows had shot up so fast and so far that they were in danger of breaking the atmosphere. Mercymorn wore a long slip of peach-coloured silk, and her white Canaanite robe was tucked over her forearms and had slipped entirely off her slender, aggrieved shoulders. She had scraped her hair into a merciless and shining coil at the back of her head, and she had no eyes for either of you.

Obviously Mercy is SUPER HOT here, if Ianthe's reaction means anything. But Harrow only describes her clothing and not how she looks. Same with Augustine's party outfit.

With Ianthe, it's always: she's wearing ..., which makes her look gross. And I did not understand at first but now I know and feel stongly that Harrow is totally into her gross-hotness. well at least I am. the grosser she's described the hotter she is.

[makeitmingi]

And They Called It Puppy Love

Genre: Romance, Fluff, Comedy

Pairing: Yunho x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Girlfriend!Reader, Boyfriend!Yunho

Summary: Despite your worries and concerns about your relationship, your golden retriever boyfriend Yunho never lets you stray too far. He's always right behind you, making sure he's always there for you with whatever you need. No, it's not just puppy love.

Word count: 4.2K

[A/N: Reader is a little insecure in this...]

The moment you class ended and you stepped out of the lecture hall, your phone rang. You looked down at the screen to see the caller ID, a small smile making its way to your face.

'Yuyu 🐾'

"How coincidental is it that you're calling just as I am stepping out of my lecture hall?" You laughed as you pressed the phone to your ear. Not wanting to have the conversation with other people around, you found a more quiet place to talk.

"Not a coincidence at all when I know your class schedule. How has your morning been? Sorry I didn't get to send you to uni today, I had to rush in for an early meeting at the office."

You could practically hear the disappointed pout in his voice but were touched by his intentions.

"No need to apologise, Yuyu. I wouldn't want you to be late because of me. Morning has been okay. How about you?" You asked.

"Same old same old. I can't wait to see you later today, tiny."

"Me too. It's been a long week and it would be nice to just relax with you." You sighed happily just at the thought. Even though you didn't live with Yunho, you did stay over at his place every Friday.

"Mmm, I'll leave you to go have your lunch. Make sure you eat a lot, tiny. Studying is important but eating and taking care of your health is more important!"

"I will, Yuyu. Have a nice day. I'll see you later." You giggled. Yunho was someone that took food and eating very seriously. He loved food and was a huge foodie. You remember being shocked by the amount of food he could eat. But being a foodie boyfriend also meant that he always made sure you were fed.

"Yes, you will. I love you, tiny."

"I love you too." You hummed and hung up. After that, you went to find your friends at one of the cafeterias on campus. You greeted them as you sat down.

"I guess I saw it coming. He started acting different and stuff." One of your friends lamented. She had just gone through a break up, ending a short but seemingly sweet relationship of 6 months.

"He probably just had puppy love." Another one pointed out.

"Puppy love?" You tilted your head.

"Mhmm. You know like just those crushes you used to get as a kid. They do everything to make you happy and impress you then once the puppy love dies, so does your relationship." She explained.

"That's probably why your relationship only lasted for 6 months." One added, making your other friends nod in agreement.

"Oh... I get it." You nodded your head, eating a bite of your food. That was when all the heads at the table turned to you. You blinked in confusion.

"(y/n), you've been in a relationship with Yunho for 8 months... Does he still act the same way as he did when you first started dating?" They asked. You thought about it for a while, thinking back to the moment when you and Yunho started dating.

"He's not as shy as he used to be? Other than that, he's still the same Jeong Yunho. He hasn't changed much in the last 8 months that we've been together." You shrugged.

"Ah, it's different with him. He's one of those golden retriever boyfriends. They're active with everyone they meet." One scoffed.

"Literal puppy love?" One teased.

"He chased you for a while, (y/n). There's nothing to worry about." One of them must have noticed the grim expression on your face and squeezed your shoulder.

Despite her comforting words of encouragement, you stared at your wallpaper of you and Yunho, slight worry settling in your heart. What if Yunho's puppy love for you just died down one day?

"We're kidding, (y/n). Really." The one who started this assured.

"Look at you and Yunho. You're couple goals, you both set the standard so high." They tried convincing you.

You wanted to correct them. You didn't set the bar high, Yunho did. They knew the lengths that Yunho went to, to do things that made you happy. Now that you think about it, you didn't do much for him. The excuse was that Yunho didn't let you do much because he was always one step ahead of you.

The only thing you did was cook for him because he wasn't very good at cooking.

"My love language is food!"

That was one of the first things Yunho told you, he loved it when you cooked for him. Other than that, Yunho mainly did a lot of things for you. He never really let you or liked you doing things for him.

Throughout the rest of the day, you tried to push aside that unnerving feeling that settled in your stomach and distract yourself with your classes.

'I got pork cutlet for lunch! San brought us to a new place. We'll come here next time! - Yuyu 🐾'

*Yuyu 🐾 sent 1 photo attachment*

Every time your phone lit up and you saw Yunho's smiling face or a message from him, it just reminded you of it again. You knew you were just overthinking now. With a sigh, you put your phone into your bag and focused on your notes.

"Hmm..." Yunho frowned with a tilt of his head as he stared intently a this phone screen.

"What's wrong, Yunho?" San, who was sitting across him and noticed the look on his face, asked. Yeosang, who was focused on his food also looked up.

"She read my text but didn't reply again..." Yunho said, looking at the 5th message that you left him on read.

"Maybe she's busy, hyung. She is in class after all." Jongho pointed out with his chopstick.

"No... If she's busy and can't reply, she will just not open the message. She only reads it if she knows she can reply." Yunho explained, he knew you and your habits well enough.

"Well, did she seem different when you called her earlier? Or was she acting weird, out of the ordinary?" Seonghwa asked. Yunho didn't answer, thinking about the phone call conversation that he had with you. The conversation wasn't long but you didn't sound upset or different to him.

"No. She was fine. We even talked about our plans for tonight and she seemed excited." Yunho blinked.

"Is that important?" He followed up with a question.

"You know the whole thing with relationships passing the 'honeymoon phase'... When the initial puppy love goes away, relationship dynamics change." Wooyoung shrugged.

"Yah, Wooyoung ah. Don't put such thoughts in his head. I'm sure that's not happening, Yunho." Hongjoong scolded Wooyoung and assured Yunho.

"No... It's okay. My relationship with (y/n) is definitely still going strong. We love each other a lot." Yunho said confidently.

"I can atest to that. All the phone calls and texting between the two of them... yuck." Jongho cringed.

"It's called love, Jongho. When you fall in love, you'll be the same too." San slung his arm around the younger's neck. Jongho gave the older a flat look, jabbing his side until San let go of him.

"I'm sure (y/n) still loves you and appreciates everything you do for her." Mingi patted Yunho's shoulder. They did think that Yunho was always doing too much but at the same time, that was how Yunho showed you he loved you, through acts of service.

"Maybe I'll get her some flowers later when I pick her up from university, to cheer her up if she's upset." Yunho decided.

"Or maybe she's not upset and just busy with university classes." Yeosang said with a shrug.

"Whether she is upset or not, I can still buy her flowers. I don't need a reason to buy my girlfriend flowers." Yunho said, already making a mental note to drop by the florist later.

"You're such a good boyfriend, Yuyu ah." Wooyoung leaned his head on his hand with a sweet smile, making Yunho blush.

"Only (y/n) calls him yuyu now." Mingi nudged the smaller male.

"Why? It's cute, I like it." Wooyoung protested.

"Exactly because (y/n) is cute when calling him that, that's why he only lets her call him that. And she lets him call her 'tiny' in return." Hongjoong reasoned.

"Ah, stop." Yunho covered his cheeks with a shake of his head, having enough of his friends teasing him. 'Yuyu' and 'tiny' are exclusive nicknames that you and Yunho have for each other. It sounded normal when you two used them but hearing others say it made Yunho feel shy.

"Okay, let's stop teasing Yunho. We need to finish up our food and get back to work." Seonghwa said. Yunho let out a sigh of relief, grateful to Seonghwa for stepping in.

But the thought lingered in Yunho's head, was he overbearing and driving you away? Were you starting to lose feelings for him?

Finally, university was done for the day and the week. You let out a tired sigh as you walked towards the campus exit. It was time to enjoy the weekend.

"Tiny!" Yunho jogged over to you before you could reach the exit. You couldn't help but smile as you saw his face.

"Yuyu." You greeted him back as he hugged you tightly, leaning over your small frame. You giggled and wrapped your arms around him.

"You've worked hard. Good job." He patted your back.

"Thank you. You too." You replied. When he pulled away, he held out a bouquet of flowers to you. People passing by stared at the two of you, thinking Yunho was handsome and sweet for giving you flowers. You softened, not expecting flowers from him.

"What's this for? I didn't forget a special day, did I?" You asked with a giggle as you received the bouquet. There was a card but you decided to read that later.

"I just felt like buying you flowers." He smiled, stroking your cheek.

"Well, they're lovely. It's a nice surprise. Thank you, Yuyu." You tiptoed to kiss his cheek. He blushed but the bright smile never left his face.

"Let's go." He held your hand. The two of you walked to where Yunho's car was parked. He opened the door for you to slide into the passenger seat.

"I'll put your bag in the back." He offered.

"Thanks. I'll hold onto these." You grinned, holding the bouquet in your lap. Yunho chuckled but nodded, putting your binder and bag into the backseat before running to the driver's side.

"Oh yeah, I got you this too. But I think the ice has melted." He scratched his head in embarrassment as he pointed to the cups in the cup holder. It was your favourite mixed fruit soda from a cafe you and Yunho frequent. They were the only one that had your favourite fruit combination.

"You drove all the way to get it?"

"I thought you might like it. I know you've been having a tiring week." Yunho turned to you.

"Thank you, Yuyu. Really. But seeing you and being with you is more than enough to make me feel better." You smiled up at him. Yunho cupped your cheek and gave you a sweet kiss.

"So where are we going now?" You asked.

"Would you like to order in or cook? If we're cooking, we can go get ingredients. My fridge is empty." Yunho informed.

"Let's cook then." You said. Yunho began driving. He had this habit, one hand would be on the wheel and the other hand would be on you either holding your hand or on your thigh.

It was nothing suggestive, purely innocent. Yunho just wanted to always be in contact with you.

"What would you like to eat tonight?" You asked as Yunho pulled into the parking space of the grocery store. He tapped his chin, thinking about his food craving. Yunho liked a lot of foods but he tried to think of easy food so you wouldn't be too tired after cooking.

"What about kimchi fried rice?" He suggested. Your face fell at the simple suggestion. Yunho always liked you cooking different dishes for him. Why was he suggesting a dish even he could make?

"I can cook something else..." You mumbled.

"Sure. Why don't you decide, tiny? I'll eat anything you cook." He kissed the back of your hand.

"Alright." You walked with him, thinking about dishes. Yunho excitedly ran to get a cart from the side. You were about to start walking in first when he called out to you.

"Wait for me, tiny!" He caught up, laughing. He grasped your hand and you smiled softly, walking beside him.

You decided to cook some of Yunho's favourite dishes, crispy pork belly, fresh kimchi (geotjori), garlic rice and marinated strawberries for dessert.

"From the ingredients, I'm excited to see what you cook." Yunho smiled, helping you reach over the counter to receive the meat from the butcher. If he got the hint or realised that you were just cooking his favourites, he never gave it away. You continued pushing the cart while Yunho momentarily stepped away.

"I need my essentials. Plus, we need movie snacks, right?" He dropped the ramen packs and snacks into the cart. You laughed as you looked what he got.

"You forgot your turtle chips." You pointed out.

"Oh, right! Thanks, tiny." He ran back to the chip aisle. You went to the fresh fruit section to grab whatever else you needed.

"Strawberries?!" His eyes lit up at the sight of you putting the punnets into the cart.

"I'll make the marinated strawberries you like." You smiled.

"Then we need ice cream! Be right back!" And he ran off just like that, making you laugh. Yunho always got so excited when food was the topic of discussion.

"Let me do it." He helped you load the items onto the conveyor belt for the cashier. Even after everything was bagged up, Yunho did most of the heavy lifting. He only let you carry the eggs.

When you arrived at Yunho's home, he immediately ran to get you your home slippers. He even slid them onto your feet for you.

"Thanks, Yuyu." You shuffled to his kitchen and put the groceries away. You've been over so many times that you just knew where everything was. Yunho's house wasn't big but it was comfortable for the two of you.

"Let me clean up a little. Be right back." He grabbed a trash bag and went to his study where he usually worked and gamed. You started on dinner since the pork needed a while to bake.

"Tiny, you forgot your apron." Yunho smiled softly, grabbing the apron off the hook.

"Arms up." He said as he carefully slipped the fabric over your head and reached around you to tie is securely. But he didn't let go, letting his arms stay around your waist.

"What's wrong?" You tilted your head as you looked up at him.

"Nothing. I just like looking at you... Can I kiss you?" He asked. You burst out laughing.

"You don't have to ask." You scoffed. Yunho grinned and leaned down to give you a kiss. He didn't pull away entirely, moving just so he could lean down to bury his face into the crook of your neck. You laughed as his hair tickled your skin. His arms tightened around your waist slightly.

"Yuyu, you have to let me go if you want dinner." You chuckled.

"I'd rather starve then." He protested.

"Why don't you help me?" You offered. At the thought of helping you, Yunho nodded excitedly. Suddenly, he ran back into his study and came back out with an item.

"I've been waiting for this. I finally get to use the new apron I bought. See?" He unwrapped it to show you proudly.

"It's very nice, Yuyu."

"Isn't it?! I bought it to match you." He beamed, slipping it over his head. But before he could tie it, you stepped forward to tie it for him, just like he always does with you.

"Tell me what to do chef!" He saluted. Although Yunho wasn't the best cook, he tried his best. And just being with him made everything feel fun. It wasn't tiring or lonely, it felt like time stood still and it was just you and him existing together in your own world.

"Hmmm..." Yunho watched you tasted the strawberries and the marinade that they were going to sit in. He didn't even know that he was staring at you with a smile on his face.

"Wae?" You blinked when you noticed him staring at you. He shook his head with a hum.

"Want a taste?" You held out a strawberry piece on a spoon. Yunho gladly leaned in to take a bite with you cupping your hand at the bottom to catch any drips.

"How is it?" You looked at him expectantly.

"Amazing." Yunho gave a thumbs up. Everything you made, Yunho thought was amazing.

"They'll taste better after they sit for a while. Could you wrap the bowl up for me, please?" You requested. He took the bowl and covered it with plastic wrap to put into his fridge.

Yunho loved these moments with you, just you and him in your own space. The little noises you made or random humming as you moved about, the way you would scrunch your nose when you were disatisfied with the taste, the way your lips would curl to the side when you were thinking.

"Careful, Yuyu." You cautioned as you took the sizzling pork out. And placed it on a trivet.

"You be careful, tiny. That oil is scary." Yunho said back to you but kind of dodged at the end of the counter, the splattering oil freaking him out a little.

"Do you want to help me cut it?" You asked, taking out the tongs and the knife.

"But I don't want to do it wrong." Yunho pouted.

"There's no wrong way, Yunho. Don't worry, we're the only ones eating it anyway." You chuckled. Yunho took the knife and tongs from you but you stood beside him to guide him.

"Tell me if I'm doing a bad job, okay?" He mumbled as he held the pork down with the tongs and began to slice with the knife.

"You're doing great, Yuyu." You smiled. Yunho was literally perfect, there was no way that he would do a bad job of anything, that's why you tried to at least get to half his level. After cutting the meat, he helped you put them on the serving dish.

"Can I have a kiss as a reward for doing a good job?" He asked. You rolled your eyes but of course you complied, never getting tired of his kisses and affection.

"Let's eat." You scooped the rice into two bowls while Yunho placed the geotjori and accompaniments on the table.

"Wow, tiny. You've out done yourself yet again. You never fail to amaze me with what you do." He reached out to hold your hand.

"W-What are you talking about?" You scoffed shyly.

You and Yunho started eating. Honestly, only after meeting Yunho, then you knew why parents felt full just by watching their children eat. Watching Yunho eat and enjoy food made you feel full.

"So good." Yunho smiled with his full cheeks of food. You laughed, reaching out to wipe the sauce that got on his lip.

"I'm glad you like it." You ate a bite of your food.

"Like it? I love it. I love anything you cook." He melted. You shot him a weird look but you couldn't help the smile on your face. Yunho always knew what to say and how to act around you, he just knew you well. You loved the way he never shied away from expressing his happiness and love.

"Don't forget, there's still dessert later." You reminded.

"There's no way I would forget. Don't worry, I'll finish everything. There's no such thing as waste here." Yunho said proudly. He took some geotjori and placed it onto your rice.

"You're so worried whether I have enough to eat that you're not eating." Yunho pouted.

"I am~" You whined. Yunho held a bite out to you, wanting to feed you. Your pursed your lips shut, knowing he was doing this to deliberately tease you.

"Come on, be good tiny. Ah~" He cooed.

"Yunho... Stop..." You felt your cheeks heat up as he continued to make baby sounds

"Ah~" He coaxed. You knew that he wasn't going to give up so you opened your mouth to take a bite, chewing begrudgingly. Yunho burst out laughing at the stink eye you were shooting him.

"Aigoo, my tiny eats so well." Yunho pinched your cheek, shaking your head slightly as he cooed at you. You squinted your eyes at him while he patted your head. He still had that big grin on his face while you finished up your dinner.

While Yunho did the dishes, you took a quick shower and finished up the dessert, putting the ice cream and strawberries into bowls for you and Yunho.

"This is the best." Yunho said, taking a bite. The both of you sat on the couch, with you tucked under Yunho's arm securely. There was a movie playing but you and Yunho weren't paying attention.

"Thank you for cooking, baby. I don't know how I survived before meeting you 8 months ago." Yunho kissed the top of your head.

8 months ago... "They do everything to make you happy and impress you then once the puppy love dies, so does your relationship." Your friend's words rang in your ears.

"Tiny?" Yunho noticed how stiff you got. But you spaced out, so deep in your thoughts as tears flooded your vision.

"Tiny!" Yunho saw the first tear spill and put his bowl aside.

"(y/n), what's wrong?!" He panicked, turning you around to face him entirely. He took your bowl from your hands to put it on the coffee table and practically carried you onto his lap, letting your legs drape over his own thighs. As he hands came up to cup your cheeks, he searched your eyes worriedly.

"You're scaring me, tiny..." Yunho whispered. But you just couldn't stop the tears from continuously falling down your cheeks as soft sobs escaped you.

"Hug me?" You croaked. He didn't even hesitate, holding you against his chest.

"Shh, tiny..." Yunho stroked the back of your head as you cried .

"Please don't leave me... I promise I'll try harder." You cried, bunching the materials of his shirt in your fists, as if he was going to walk away from you right this instance.

"Leave you? Baby, why would I leave you?!" Yunho held your shoulders, he couldn't hide the shock he felt from your words.

"I'm worried you'd get sick of me after we've been together for a while." You sniffled.

"Wait, the boys were talking about this earlier. 'Honeymoon phase' and 'puppy love'. Is that what you're worried about?" Yunho clarified. You nodded in your head in confirmation. Yunho could held but soften, leaning forward to give you a lingering kiss.

"Tiny, you don't have to worri about that. With me, the only puppy love you're getting is me being a literal golden retriever and following you everywhere." Yunho rubbed your cheek with his thumb.

"It's just... you do everything for me. And I barely do anything for you. Won't you get tired of doing that?"

"I do those things for you because I want to do them. It's one of the ways I show you I love you. Plus, you cook for me and in my book, that surpasses everything else." Yunho scoffed.

"Honestly, I was worried I was being overbearing. And that I should give you more space." He confessed.

"Yuyu... never. You're never overbearing. I love you and appreciate everything you do for me. I don't want space, I don't want to be anymore further from you than I already am." You held his hand.

"I'm glad to hear that. Because I feel the same." Yunho lifted you up in his arms.

"Yunho!" You squealed, wrapping your arms around his neck. He walked into his room and put you on his bed, crawling into the space beside you. He held you close, his much larger frame enveloping your smaller one as your limbs tangled themselves together. Leaning down, he nuzzled his nose against your cheek.

"You're never too much. I'll gladly do anything for you like froth your milk for your lattes in the morning." Yunho chuckled.

"You just like playing with my automated frother..." You rolled your eyes.

You remembered when you showed Yunho the electric whisk. He was so excited and that ended up with you have so much milk foam in your coffee.

"True." He grinned.

"But i'm seriously, I'll always be right there beside you, okay? I'll come whenever you call, whenever you need me. I'm there." He stared into your eyes, brushing your hair away from your face.

"Me too." You placed your hand on his cheek as he smiled sweetly. He chuckled, peppering your face in kisses, making you scrunch your nose.

"You're stuck with me. I'm not gonna let you go so easily." He hugged you to emphasise his point.

"I'm very okay with that." You giggled.

"Good. Because you don't have a choice." He laughed.

[6ix9inewiturmom]

Show And Tell- Matthew Sturniolo

Summary: When matt takes your virginity and shows you how to make yourself feel better about not being so experienced in the sex world

Warnings: Smut, Inexperienced!sub!reader, Experienced!Dom!Matt, praising, cursing, use of Y/N, Oral (fem receiving), P in V, Unprotected sex (Safe sex is great sex, cause you don’t want that late text that I think I'm late text- Lil Wayne), TW! brief talk of emotionally absent parents!

A/N: i absolutely love writing sweet Matt, but what i love writing more is MATT THE MF MUNCHHHH!!

psa: DONT STEAL MY WORK!! THIS BELONGS TO ME MYSELF AND I!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Ever since Middle school Nick, Matt, Chris, and I have been inevitable. Their mother, Mary Lou, has always taken me in as her own, considering I was the youngest out of 5 in my family, and my parents had me later in life, as soon as I learned how to care for myself, they quit raising me and only came through in times they ‘needed’ to be parents. Mary Lou was the woman I called my mother. whenever they went on a family vacation I always went with them. To the mall? I went. She basically had Quadruplets. When the triplets moved to LA, we were all over 18, and I was more than ready to leave my parent's house even though I had pretty much moved in with them for how much I stayed over, so I moved with them. I offered to get an apartment close by, but all of them collectively agreed and even argued with me about it, so now we all live in the same house.

Today was pretty much a normal day in the house, very calm, no one was filming, and we just did our own things. Matt and I had no plans, Chris went out shopping with some friends, and Nick had meetings and then dinner plans with Tara for a collab idea which left Matt and I at the house.

“Cant believe that you and my mother BOTH collectively agreed to let me walk out of the house looking like that” Matt said laughing showing me a memory that popped up on his moms Facebook page.

“To be fair you were dead set on wearing that entire outfit and your mom and I both knew we couldn't talk you out of that” I said laughing back and throwing my hands up in defense.

“That's when I dated Cassie too, how gross,” he said giving himself the Ick.

“She was the town whore, what'd you expect,” I say giggling at my comment.

“You know I never asked, whatever happened to Jackson? I just recalled he spread some rumor about him taking your virginity, and a bunch of other stuff, and you came to the house crying and Mom was comforting you and you never spoke about that again” he looks over at me as my head hung low looking at my hands.

Jackson was a guy I ‘dated’ junior year of high school, he took me on one date, it was very nice and he seemed amazing, though I should've listened to Nick when he told me Jackson was no good. After our date instead of taking me home he insisted on talking more and drove to the park in the middle of the city. His intentions were not pure. Jackson tried every which way to get me in the backseat, I rejected many many times that night and made some excuse on how I was on my period and that immediately grossed him out. Come to find out, as soon as we got back to school he spread a rumor around the entire school that he had taken my virginity and told the school I was into weird kinks. I knew I couldn't go to my mother about that because she would have taken me directly to the health clinic to ‘check if I was still pure’ so I went to Mary Lou, i and made sure to tell her to tell the boys not to bring it up to me and try their best to shut it down.

“I uh thought i told you about what happened?” i lied and nervously laughed.

“Nope,” he said popping the ‘p’ “I'm pretty sure I would have remembered something that important to where my own mother had to come to me, Nick, and Chris, and tell us not to talk to you about it, plus I mean it's been 4 years if you don't wanna talk about it I understand,” he said reassuring me.

I've always felt comfortable with all 3 of them, and always had a special relationship with all of them, and trust them with my life. I never went to them about this because I was embarrassed I was a virgin, I wasn't gonna tell them I didn't lose my virginity, considering both Matt and Chris came to me about sex advice I didn't want them to look at me any different for not being experienced enough so I lied and told them that Jackson did take my virginity but I wasn't into the weirder stuff Jackson accused me of.

“Fuck” I mutter under my breath. “Okay so, I just wanna say one thing before I tell you what actually happened between Jackson and me” I look back at him with nerve piercing through my body.

“Y/N, you know you can tell me anything” Matt adjusts himself to face me.

“So don't judge me,” I start taking a deep breath. “So Jackson made up that entire rumor,” I take my bottom lip between my teeth.

“I’m extremely confused” he scratched the back of his head laughing.

“God this is embarrassing” I place my head in my hands “fuck it, so he didn't take my virginity at all, and obviously the kink thing was a lie” I look up at him who still has a puzzled look on his face.

“So if Jackson didn't take your virginity then who did? Cause you basically swore off dating after him” he raises his eye brows in confusion.

“No one, Matt, I'm a uh Virgin” I drop my head down in embarrassment fiddling with my fingers.

“No fucking way, you gave both Chris and me AMAZING sex advice, stop fucking with me Y/N/N” he said laughing.

“Matt I'm being for real,” I shoot him an awkward smile “and please the sex advice ain't nothing, I know what I would like so I kinda made an assumption and by the looks of it, I'm guessing it worked” I nervously laughed.

“Holy shit,” his eyes go wide “why haven't you, you know?”

“It's hard for me to trust people, especially with something like that,” I shrugged my shoulders “When I hit puberty, my mother gave me a ‘save yourself till marriage’ talk instead of informing me of my body she scared me from sex, but I had gone to your mom one day when you three were hanging with Nate and she actually gave me that kinda talk and more or less told me to always make sure I felt safe and in the hands of someone I trust, and Jackson did neither of those things” I continue to fiddle with my fingers.

“You trust me right?” he says curiously

“Matt don't be stupid, yes I do” I lightly giggle. “Why is that even a question?”

“ah fuck it, never mind” he brushes it off.

“No, no, I told you something that no one knows so come on speak up,” I lightly push his arm.

“I was gonna say I could teach you a couple things about sex but i ain't too sure you'd be down for that anyway” he shrugged his shoulders turning his body back towards the TV.

“What if I was down?” I look at him through my lashes.

His head jerks in my direction, “actually?” his eyes light up.

“Matt do you know how embarrassing it is to be an almost 21-year-old who's never had sex,” a soft giggle escaped my lips.

“Have you ever like, touched yourself before?” he said slightly cringing at his words.

I was a little taken aback by his curiosity “I mean yeah, once or twice” I shrugged my shoulders.

“Did you like ever finish from that?” he shifts his body back in my direction. “I know this sounds a bit invasive but I promise if you want to do this I have a reason for asking these questions” he placed his hand on my knee.

“No… it just um” I swallow the lump in my throat “I just couldn't..”

“So you've never experienced anything sexual?” the curiosity in his voice makes me feel safer and know he's not judging me and is actually caring enough to ask and not just crawling on top of me and getting down to it.

“Nope,” I say softly

He slowly nods “Do you want to learn?” his voice goes soft.

“H-how?” I stutter out.

“Obviously if you feel comfortable enough with it, I could be the one to show you, If you catch my drift” he sends me a reassuring smile.

“Y-you would take my virginity?” I ask nervously.

“Only if you want me to” his voice trails off

“What about Nick and Chris? God that would be awkward if they walked in or something, oh my god I don't want them to think any-” he cuts me off

“Woah slow down, it's okay, they won't be back till like 9, and it's 4 now, we'll be okay kid” he laughed rubbing soft circles with his thumb over my knee. “Do you want to do this?”

I nod softly. “No this is important to you, I want your verbal consent that this is okay” he moves closer to me.

“Yes, please, I want this, all of this,” I say softly adjusting my body closer to his.

He smiles leaning closer to my face and softly pressing his lips against mine. My eyes fall shut and I turn into jello as I feel the way his hand that was once on my knee moves up toward my hip. A small smile creeps upon both of our lips. I softly pull away.

“Can we not do this on the couch?” I say laughing a little

“Absolutely,” he stands up almost immediately and picks me up bridal style walking into his room and kicking the door open as I giggle like a kid in a candy store.

He carefully sets me down on his blue silk sheets crawls on top of me and presses his lips onto mine once again making a soft groan travel between our lips.

“Can I take this off?” he says softly playing with the hem of my shirt.

“Yes” I bite my bottom lip

He smiles down at me and pulls my shirt off leaving me in my bra. He hooks his finger under my bra strap rubbing his finger up and down just looking down at me. “You're so beautiful. I don't ever tell you much” his comment makes a soft pink shade appear on my cheeks.

He leans down again kissing me and pointing his tongue out for permission to enter, my mouth opens slightly as his tongue explores my mouth, and this time his hands start to grab at my covered breast. “You can take it off, Matt” I giggle between kisses.

He gave me no response but his left hand held my lower back and his right unclasped my bra letting it fall right off my shoulders. He pulled away from kissing me and looked down at my breast in awe. “God you're Fucking beautiful” he mutters.

His mouth begins leaving kisses down from my jawline to my collarbone and stopping at my breast looking up at me through his lashes almost asking for permission without asking. I shoot him a smile and nod and his tongue licks softly across my nipple sending shivers down my spine. He smirks to himself attaching his mouth to one of my nipples and slightly tugging at my other. He sucks and nips at my nipples taking them between his teeth every now and again. My breathing gets heavier at the sensitivity and my head falls back as a soft whimper falls from my mouth.

He lifts his head up and places himself between my legs to unbuckle my shorts, shimmy them down my legs, and throws them with the pile of clothes next to the bed. He admires my choice of underwear today, smirking as they're unironically his favorite color, purple, with a tiny little bow right up top. He hooks his finger at the top of them sliding back and forth before sliding them down my legs leaving me bare beneath him.

“such a pretty fucking pussy” he groans out. he leans his head down and spits down onto my aching pussy. using his thumb he slowly moves up and down.

“Holy fuck” I gasp out.

Matt chuckles and moves his body down where his head is now between my legs. His thumb is still slowly going up and down he begins kissing down my thighs on both sides. “I want you” he places another kiss on my thigh “to tell me” Another kiss “What feels good to you alright?” he places a kiss right above my clit.

“O-okay” I say nervously

“And please don't be afraid to tell me to stop” he gives me a reassuring smile.

I nod sending him the same warm smile. He starts to place a soft kiss on my clit before flattening his tongue on my pussy and licking a stripe up and groaning once the taste of me hits his tongue.

“Oh, Matt” My breathing hitches and I throw my head back in pleasure.

His tongue begins to flick up at a faster pace making moans spill out of my mouth, his eyes are fixated on me and how my body reacts to his mouth pleasuring me.

“Fuck you're so fucking good at this” My fingers run through his hair forcing his head deeper into me.

He moans into me sending vibrations through my body as my hips jerk up and my eyes roll back. His lips attach to my clit sucking on it a little causing a squeal to fall from my mouth.

“Fuck i-i I think I'm gonna cum” I stutter out as an unfamiliar knot forms in the pit of my stomach

“Mhm” he mutters before lifting his head “Let it go sweet girl” he lowers his head again taking my clit between his teeth and flicking upwards on it.

“Oh my FUCK” I scream out when that knot snapped a wave of euphoria pierced my body and my orgasm dripped out of me making Matt move his body to watch it happen.

He wiped his mouth using his arm smiling “you okay baby?” he chuckled.

“Fuck” I breathe out “If that's why people are sex addicts I see why god damn that was amazing” I smiled up at him.

“I'm not even done yet” he smirks lifting his shirt over his head and throwing it across the room.

“Are you 100% positive you want this?” he asks as he stands up removing his belt.

“This is the first decision I've ever made that I'm 100% positive I won't regret,” I say as I watch him remove his pants and free his cock with his tip red and throbbing for attention.

He climbs back and moves me farther up on the bed. “Fuck there's no way that's gonna fit in me, that's fucking massive,” I say as my eyes stare at his cock.

“It'll fit baby” he chuckles “shit I don't have a condom,” he says rummaging through his bedside table.

“I'm on birth control, you don't need one” I smile up at him.

“Are you sure?” he smirks.

“Yes Matt,” I smile batting my lashes up at him.

“Okay then” he brings his hand up to his mouth and spits in it before gliding his now wet hand to coat his aching cock. “I gonna go slow, inch by inch and you tell me when to move, and tell me if it hurts too much I'll stop immediately,” he says aligning his cock with my entrance.

“Okay,” I breathe out.

As his tip slowly enters me I hiss. “Are you okay?” he says with a concerned look on his face.

“I'm okay just hurts” I reply biting my lower lip.

He slowly enters another couple of inches. Watching how my face nuzzled up at the new feeling. Then he slides in another few inches. After a couple of minutes, he's fully bottomed out. “Look at that, you're doing so fucking amazing,” he says adjusting himself closer to my face and brushing loose strands out of my face.

“Y-you can move,” I say nodding slowly.

He smiles before slowly thrusting out and moving towards my hips as the pain I once felt turns into pleasure in a matter of seconds.

“Oh, matt fuck faster please” I plead gripping his biceps for support.

“God you're so fucking tight” his pace speeds up as he lowers his body and begins kissing my neck and groaning into me.

“S-so fucking big” I moan out.

He rolls his hips towards mine and slams them into me. His grunts become harsher. “Fuck” he growled in my ear. “I love the way you feel wrapped around me” he moans in my ear which is almost a whimper.

“Matt” I scream out as his cock finally and repeatedly kisses my G-spot.

“Someone close eh?” he lifts up sadistically grinning at me.

I nod vigorously as my legs begin twitching and shaking around his waist and that knot forms in my stomach for the second time tonight.

“Cum all over my fucking dick baby, I know you can do it,” he said as his thrusts become sloppy.

With just his words that knot snapped in my stomach and formed a white ring around the base of his cock as my cum coats his cock. With a couple more thrusts he nuzzles his head in my neck and paints my walls a shade of white. He slowly pulls out careful not to hurt me.

“Fuck you're amazing” I breath out coming down from my euphoric state.

“Yeah? You did fucking amazing,” he smiles down at me laying next to me and pulling me into a cuddled skin-to-skin hug.

“Thank you matt” I mutter into his chest.

“No problem sweetheart” he kissed the top of my head. “You know I'd do anything for you” he softly whispers making me smile and nuzzle into him more.

“Do you want me to run you a nice bath? Or you wanna go get food? What do you wanna do, cause we got about 2 hours till Nick and Chris come home” he pulls away looking at me.

“We can shower and I can cook for us” I smile at him.

“Perfect” he smiles at me and picks me up bridal style again to carry me to the bathroom.

The way he cared for me, I knew I made the right decision. Losing my virginity to the man I knew I could trust.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

A/N pt 2: TY TO THE PERSON WHO REQUESTED THIS!! BECAUSE THIS WAS VERY FUN TO WRITE!! anyways i hope you guys are having an amazing evening, afternoon, morning, or night!! and i love you guys!! 🩷🩷

[cottonlemonade]

Hello, can I get a large mocha latte for Ushijima?

Celebrating An Anniversary

word count: 791 || avg. reading time: 3 mins.

pairing: post-time skip husband!Ushijima x chubby!Reader

genre: fluff with some suggestiveness

warnings: spoilers, mdni, mild swearing

request: fluffy-spicy, celebrating an anniversary with husband Ushijima

“To a wonderful evening.“

Wakatoshi raised his glass. You beamed as you did the same and gently clinked it against his.

The champagne prickled on your tongue and you watched him cut a generous first bite off his steak to then carefully place it on the side of your plate.

“Thank you, honey.“

He smiled, looking satisfied as he began to cut a piece for himself.

“You‘re welcome, sweetheart. And please make sure to order dessert later. You will need your energy as I intend to make love to you often and thoroughly tonight.“

You choked on your next sip of the sparkling wine. The coughing made some other guests turn around in annoyance but you stared incredulously at your husband who, completely unfazed, poured you a glass of water and handed it across the table.

“Uhm, Toshi?”

“Yes, my love?”

Your cheeks were burning and you were glad for the cold water, the glass slightly trembling in your fingers.

“What- I mean. What?”

He furrowed his brow in confusion.

“I mean… you usually don’t uhm… announce something like that.”

“Oh.”, he shrugged and went back to his steak, “I wanted to try something different.”

“Different.”

He nodded and didn’t elaborate.

“So, I'm not complaining - and I will get that dessert later - but what brought this on?”

“I called Satori for advice and he said I should be more open with my intentions towards you. He said that… hm, one moment, sweetheart.”

You watched open mouthed as he reached into the breast pocket of his suit jacket that hung over the back of the chair and produced a neatly folded piece of paper. Opening it for reference as it seemed, he read, “Let her know she is desirable by flirting - such as: telling her she looks/smells nice, kissing her in public, letting her know that you can’t wait to be alone with her or - more advanced - let her know you want to sleep with her later that day.” He folded the note again and tucked it away.

Your cheeks were burning and the pasta you had been so eagerly anticipating a few minutes ago, still steamed expectantly but untouched on the plate before you.

Toshi had done all of these things today. Before you left for the restaurant he had complimented both how your dress fit beautifully around your chubby figure and your perfume, had caught you very off guard by kissing you deeply in the parking lot on your way to the door and now this.

“Uhm, could I see that paper for a second, please?“

“Of course.“

He reached back into the pocket and handed it to you.

Clearing your throat you opened it and were stunned by the amount of notes. At the very top were what seemed to be suggestions for date locations for your anniversary.

Toshi had circled “dinner at a fancy restaurant you know she likes“.

Underneath was a myriad of things to do after the date. Some of them sweet, like going for a stroll in the park, but the other 95 percent detailed things to do in the bedroom. All of them circled - some with extra notes next to it explaining what they meant exactly.

“I see.“, you croaked, returning the note. You felt very warm all of the sudden.

Voice shaking a little in your flustered state, you asked, “What brought this on?“

“Do you remember when I went out to have a drink with the team a few weeks ago?“

You nodded.

“At first we talked about volleyball and eventually Hoshiumi-kun moved the conversation to our spouses.“

You nodded again.

“At that point a group of strangers joined the table because nothing else was free. As we talked, they noted that Tobio and I didn't seem to have a lot to offer besides good looks and they wondered how we were even married, since we are so boring.“

You scoffed loudly.

“Oh, just point me in their direction, babe. It‘s on sight.“ How dare these pathetic losers! Your shoulders shook with anger.

“You are not boring, Toshi!“, you said firmly and he looked genuinely surprised at your sudden outburst, “You are loving and wonderful and dependable, you make me laugh and feel safe and if that‘s boring to those jerks then they can just go f- fly a kite!“ Suddenly remembering your surroundings you opted for milder words.

Toshi‘s large warm hand laid itself soothingly over your clenched fist next to your plate, rubbing his thumb gently over your skin.

“Thank you for saying that, sweetheart. I love you.“

“I love you, too.“

“Would you prefer if I‘d dismiss the list?“

“Well… maybe not all of it.“, you winked and he nodded, signaling over a waiter to order extra dessert.

a/n: thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to write something for him! Love him ^^ I hope you enjoyed it 🌟

[live-laugh-lenney]

You should so do a fic where the reader has a podcast (like saving grace) and everyone noticed how comparable she and Arthur seem he. He’s a guest (even though she’s like much more extroverted) would be fun🤞❤️

oh, this would be so cute :'))

if there was one thing yn felt comfortable doing, it was waffling.

she just loved to talk. about anything and everything, from what she had read on twitter to what she had heard about online to a brand new documentary that she had taken an interest in when flicking the channels on the television. delving deep into topics that had endless possibilities, spewing off facts that she'd read about online and putting her own thoughts forward in certain aspects that she found interesting and favourable to whoever she was with.

when she came up with the idea of hosting her very own podcast, in the middle of a housewarming party for one of her friends, she was excited to have a platform where she could let her own thoughts be freed yet she was also terrified it wouldn't take off and that she'd make it to a respectful ten episodes before she gave in and decided it wasn't something that the world needed.

when her first episode came out, she had asked james marriott to be her very first guest. one of her best friends, someone she had known for a while, someone who she felt comfortable around and gave her the space to speak freely without making her feel judged. allowing him to promote his new album as well as allowing them to discuss all kinds of musical knowledge from who their favourite bands were and who he would love to open for on a world tour.

and it took off.

earning herself over half a million views in the passing of one day, a lot of youtube subscribers who were offering their own suggestions on the different guests she could have and the more positivity she saw, the more she read, the more excited she was to continue.

she had herself a sweet studio; big beanbags instead of chairs, with a blanket draped over the back of each one and a decorative pillow that was there for added comfort and matched the colour scheme of the whole room, with shelves nailed to the wall full of relatable objects and images that fit her branding - images of her friends, her podcast name in neon lights and a few faux plants that hung low. it was just a simple setup but it felt homely and that was the vibe she had planned from the very beginning.

"good morning, good afternoon or good evening, depending on when you're checking in. i'm yn and welcome back to the one and only podcast on youtube dot com where we just sit and talk shit for an hour," she grins widely at the camera, cosying back into the beanbag beneath her and crossing her legs, hand holding the microphone to her lips, "today, we're joined the king of 90 day fiancé. it's mister arthur television."

"hello, hi."

he gives the camera a short wave and smiles widely, already having cosied himself down in a similar manner to the way yn was sitting in her beanbag, their shoes (both a sucker for comfort and choosing their air force 1's over any other trainer) kicked off aimlessly onto the rug in the middle of the room and left in a heap, his jacket draped over the back of his seat.

"thank you for having me," he looks in her direction, "this is definitely one of my favourite sets i've ever been on. it feels so homey and wholesome."

"i tried to base it on what my bedroom back home used to look like as a teenager," she giggles softly, looking over her shoulder and flicking on the orb lamp that was placed on a shelf above their heads for a bit of additional lighting to fit the ambience of the room, "i was such a tumblr girl growing up, i think it shows."

"i was gon'a say," he laughs and she rolls her eyes in his direction, "it feels very nice. very comforting. especially with the blankets."

"my nana knitted them for me," yn states, "just for this podcast. she's an avid listener, my number one fan, ."

"really?"

"no. i'm kidding," yn laughs softly and he looks across to her, "i don't think she really gets the whole podcast thing, to be honest. she's only just started to understand the whole youtube thing, bless her. she's a sweet soul and i love her but she's so innocent when it comes to all things technological."

"you should use that story more," arthur insists and adjusts himself in the seat as he felt himself sliding down into a slouch, "it adds more story to the setup. it's cute."

"i'll tell her you said that. she'll love it," yn giggles, 'but, anyway. you, arthur frederick, are one of my most requested guests to appear on my podcast."

arthur's eyes widened and he can feel the heat covering his cheeks as he looks across to her, microphone still held tight to his lips, hoping it hid the shy smile that grew on his lips.

"seriously. i had people practically spamming me on twitter to get you on here," she explains and looks at the camera, "you're a loved man, aren't you?"

"i guess i am," he admits shyly, "people are also asking me and isaac to get you on the bach and arthur podcast. close second to george."

"we'll have to make that happen," yn grins widely, "the viewers would love that crossover. chaos crew and little ol' me."

"i think you'd fit in perfectly," he says, "at least i'll have someone on there that appreciates my facts and interesting tidbits of information. it gets lost amongst them. they're not so intelligent when it comes to you and i."

she snorts and shakes her head, dropping her eyes down to her lap before she looks back up; he wasn't lying, truth be told. she was no stranger to being in a conversation with him, at parties and at events both of them were attending, that involved exchanged fact after fact after fact with each other, hours passing by as they discussed nature topics and the newest piece of information to do with outer space and all the theories coming from online.

with the hour closing in, she didn't want the conversations to end. and she knew, in the back of her mind, that she needed him back on her podcast for another episode because he understood her. and she understood him. and their talks flowed effortlessly with no need for extra encouragement from those around them in the room.

he was an interesting man and she wanted more.

both personally and for her podcast.

--

anyone else getting heart eye vibes from the two of them???

yn was in her element for this episode!!

arthur being on this podcast just made my day. we need more of the two of them!!!

the way there was no silence at all this entire episode. conversations flow between these two.

the two of them are the same person, i swear.

without a doubt, arthur is the male version of yn. that's adorable.

its like the universe copied and pasted their personalities into two people of the opposite genders. that's so cute!!

--

"the podcast episode was a hit thanks to you."

yn surprises him and made him jump as she approached him at the bar, his figure turning from where he was stood with his back to her so he could pull her in for a hug, and she grins up at him before her own arms wrapped around his waist. a sex on the beach cocktail held tight in her hand and she was careful not to spill it down the back of his shirt.

"i was wondering where you were," he says and lets go of her to pick up his beer that had been placed on the bartop, "when you texted me to say you were coming to chris' birthday drinks, i knew i had to come and find you when you arrived."

"looks like i beat you to it," she says and she takes a sip of her drink through the straw, "people loved the two of us together on there."

"yeah?"

she nods quickly.

"i'm pretty sure it was the best episode to date. figures wise," she says and he grins widely, looking over her shoulder and seeing a free table in the corner of the room, using his head to indicate for her to look at where he was looking, "i'm gon'a need you to feature again, for sure."

she turns on her heels and wiggles her way through the crowd, the feeling of his hand resting on the base of her back driving her insane as she set her drink down on the table and hopped up on the stool, watching as he did the same.

"i'm not keeping you from chris, am i?"

"no, he's about to hop on the karaoke with isaac," arthur cackles out loud and looks over his shoulder at where his two friends were arguing over the song book, "i'm too sober for that at the moment so I can't think of anything worse right now."

"you're not one of those party poopers, are you?"

"no," he shakes his head, "i just need to be almost blackout drunk in order to belt out my lungs really, really poorly."

"i think i need to get some shots in you then because i really need to see that tonight." xx

[strrykais]

die with a smile

a hwang hyunjin short story

week five

though hyunjin was no longer staying in the hospital, that did not stop him from seeing you. everyday after his online classes he would make his was to you for the two hours left in visitation, sometimes the nurses would allow him to stay a little longer than usual.

over the couple of days, you were tired. you kept telling him to not worry and he tried not to, but deep down he worried. he always would try to get something out the nurses or your doctor, but it was the same excuse of "only her and her guardian" can only know.

even if you were tired your smile was still so bright that it would always make him smile.

today you wanted to go for a walk around the yard, and hyunjin let you leaned against him as both you slowly made your way looking around the flower beds. you stop slowly crouching down to smell the roses.

"i know it's very basic, but i do think roses are one of my favorites." you say touching the rose so softly, almost scared to ruin the beauty.

"why is that?" hyunjin asks crouching down right beside you. his face watching the features of yours, and the shine in your eyes.

"because they can convey how you feel based on the color. you know if i wasnt in here, sick, i would own a flower shop. i think they are so beautiful, and can say a lot to someone you give them to." you say struggling to stand up. hyunjin quickly pops to his feet, giving you a hand to stand.

"i mean, when you get out of here you can totally open one up, ill even be your first customer." hyunjin says leading you back to your room.

"yeah, that would be nice." you say softly.

its the day of hyunjins appointment and he felt good, he was hoping for some good news, or even no news about his condition. so he can make his way faster to see you.

on the way to the hospital, hyunjin stops at a near by flower shop. he wanted to surprise you.

"hi can i help you young man?" the older shop lady asked. staring at him as he looks at the arraignments of flowers in vases.

"yeah i want to give someone some flowers, i would actually like some red roses if thats okay?" hyunjin could feel the blush of his cheeks and could the warmth of his ears.

the lady smiles with a nod, walking to the back. after a few minutes she comes out with the flowers wrapped up. "confessing to someone lucky?"

"yeah something like that." hyunjin says blushing, paying his bill and rushing out the door.

hyunjin was sitting with his doctor not exactly paying attention to what exactly is he saying. he just wanted to see you, he was so used to having you around that not having you was lonely.

"hyunjin your charts are good, it looks like the medication is helping. no new changes but that could be a good sign as well." hyunjin nods

"if thats all can i go." he says already trying to get out his chair.

"yeah you are more than welcome to go, but there is som-" the doctor was cut off by hyunjin rushing out the door, he was not gonna wait. if it was important he will find the doctor later.

with roses in his hand, hyunjin rushes down the hall passing familiar nurses who give him sad smiles. hyunjin couldn't put his finger on it but the air in the hall was cold, dark and empty.

hyunjin saw your door open, rushing to it, hyunjin peeks around to see an empty bed. no not just an empty bed, empty walls. the paintings you painted were always hung. the sheets on your bed were folded waiting for someone new to occupy them. hyunjin felt his heart race. where were you. you were here yesterday. you were fine. you had to be fine.

letting the flowers fall to the ground hyunjin runs straight to jisungs room, not bothering with knocking. he pushes himself right in.

the scene in front of him made his worse fears feel like a reality.

jisung was crying in the arms of minho, minho tear stained face looks up at him and before he could say anything. hyunjin begins shaking his head.

"no." he was breaking " no no no" the tears were coming out before he could even realize.

"SHE WAS FINE. WE WERE TALKING ABOUT ROSES YESTERDAY AND HER FLOWER SHOP... no no she fine" hyunjin was full on crying, he felt like his world was crashing down.

"i didn't even get to tell her how i felt." hyunjin says in a whisper.

hyunjin didnt even realize he was crying on jisungs shoulder, he continued to cry with both his friends trying to soothe him.

after a while, hyunjin finally made it out of jisungs room, eyes red, nose running. he couldn't pass your room, not with you not in it. so he went the long way around. hyunjin let his feet do the walking while his mind wandered.

hyunjin found himself stopped at a certain door. yall's secret hideout.

hyunjin walked in the only form of light coming from the halls outside. hyunjin slowly reaches out, turning on the light.

what he first saw was your painting, the painting you were painting when he first found out you were a patient. it was a vases of roses. not just red. pink, orange and purple buds fill the vase. it was beautiful. you never let him see what you were hiding behind that tapestry.

hyunjin felt his eyes begin to water, he looks down to see a fallen letter addressed to him.

my dearest, hyunjin.

i wanna apologize for not telling you at first, and maybe its too late. but i had stage four cancer, i was too far gone for the doctors to do anything so i guess that leaves me to where we are right now.

when we first met, i was due to die any day. but by some miracle i continued to live. i was living on borrowed time, but i so desperately wanted to use every second on you.

you reminded me of myself when i first learned about having cancer, except i was further along before we caught it. i wanted to be someone you looked up to, and not let cancer get in your way. i didn't have that, i had to learn that me being the way i was, was hurting people i cared most about.

i didnt want to be forgotten in the dreams of the hospital so i chose you to remember me when my time has come, and along the short time we had together i found myself falling for you. you were the one i couldn't tell, because i knew i wouldn't be able to tell you, our time was past due.

thank you hyunjin, because through that fake happiness you so graciously pointed out, you became my real source of happiness. i tried to fight for you, for us, but sadly, my prayers weren't heard.

this painting was for you, slowly the colors of the roses made their way onto the canvas and it's everything i wish i could tell you, if i was still around.

live long and live freely, and don't be afraid to try, because trying got me, you.

forever yours.

hyunjin fell to his knees, the loud sobs echoed throughout the cold hospital.

previous | masterlist

a/n : thank you so much for the love and support on die with a smile! i hope you enjoyed it they way i enjoyed writing it! please let me know your thoughts!

tags : @hannamoon143 @jellyleggz @tajannah-price1 @skzfelixlove @kkamismom12 @mafiulaputaama

[sopfiista]

FOUND FAMILY

I literally love this show and am low key obsessed. Then I thought about writing something cute abt Mob. NOTHING SEXUAL CUZ THAT BOY IS LIKE THIRTEEN

Mob didn’t have those special family friendships. Sure, he had his actual family, but he yearned for an actual friendship that made you comfortable with.

He guessed Reigen was one… but he was more like a teacher, not a family member.

There was you, of course, but Mob never really thought you liked him. You hung out with him a lot, but you were mech more popular and charismatic than him. You probably didn’t even see him as a close friend.

Today was like any other day after school. You had your little after school classes and he had his body-fitness club. Like usual, you would wait for him after your class by the exit, texting on your phone or chatting with a few friends.

Today you were by yourself, which made Mob feel a lot better. He liked it when it was only you and him.

You seemed to notice him before he could call out to you, looking up and smiling.

You shoved your phone into your pocket and jogged up to him.

“Hey mob!” You said, giving him your toothy grin, like usual.

“Hi…” he said, giving you a tiny smile.

“How was class?” You asked, making conversation.

“It was okay… I’m just a bit tired…” he sighed, flattening his messed up hair a bit. You laughed behind your hand.

“That club does that to ya,” you said, shrugging, “can I tell you about my club?”

Mob nodded. He liked your voice, so he let you talk.

“Well, my book club started a new book, which is really exciting!” You said, beaming at him, “I don’t remember the book… but it’s about some wizard boy or whatever… it’s really good though!”

You went on about the book, also informing him about some drama going on between your two friends and some other things.

A warm blanket of comfort washed over him as he listen to you talk, making sure to stay slow so the walk would finished later.

“- and yeah,” you sighed, “and that Tanaka girl is still asking me to ask you about your brother,”

Mob hummed, nodding. He had put his hands into his pockets, fingers gripped around his phone. He was a bit jealous of what she had said…

“But I told her no. Like straight up! You told me to stop being so nice a be a bit straightforward… so I did!” You laughed, shaking her head, “so thank you for the advice. If she comes up to you, you say no, okay?”

Mob hummed, nodding.

“Yeah…” he said, knowing he would do the complete opposite. He hated being rude to people and making them sad.

“Tell me about your day,” you said, turning to him.

Mob looked over at you, a bit shocked. “Uhm… well…” he said, thinking, “nothing has happened recently… I took off work today, somehow, but that’s about it.”

You hummed.

“Yeah… your boss has always seemed a bit shady to me…” you mumbled, “but, if you’re happy, then that’s all that matters!”

Mob stayed silent, feeling his chest bloom in happiness. He had been told that by a few people, but not many. Usually it was Reigen, who would say it half-heartedly.

But yours was genuine.

Mob just looked at you, standing still. You had stopped, asking if he was okay. He was. He was very okay.

He had found someone who never judged him. Someone who would defend him without him there. Someone he could trust completely.

He had finally found his family.

[willowser]

bakugou + strawberries ; 2.7k ੈ‧₊˚ for our meet fruit collab ! ‧₊˚✧ ₊˚

mina suggests speed-dating.

first as a joke — you think — after the two of you spend too many weekends in a row watching sappy rom-coms on her couch while crying into a bowl of trail mix, and then a second time, and then a third time, after you refuse.

in her last attempt, she pulls out the big ones: her upcoming birthday. it will be so fun!! she tells you, with her big eyes and bigger pout, looking at you as if you'd hung the stars by saying yes. it's a cheap shot, really, because she knows you or anyone would do pretty much anything when it comes to mina the birthday girl.

— and that's how you find yourself here, sitting in too nice of an outfit to be spending your allotted time listening to a man bash his ex-girlfriend.

you might have found him a bit cuter if he wasn't doing that, or if he showed even an ounce of interest in you whatsoever. instead, he's treating this like a therapy session, and you're not getting paid for it.

when the timer rings, you're more than thankful. irritated enough, even, to spin around the room in search of mina — who is happily watching on as two men grapple with each other for who gets to sit across from her next. you suppose being a top hero is good for that, finding someone who is willing to give you their all.

to yourself, you sigh quietly and turn back to the little bowl of strawberries in the center of the small table, the flutes of champagne on either side of it. mina's bottle, you noticed, is almost totally empty; your last date hadn't even looked at yours, nor did he seem to think to offer you a drink.

it's not that you're jealous. really. you wouldn't even say that you're interested in dating right now, finding your job at the agency to be too much of a whirlwind to balance, anyway. you love mina: she's your closest friend, your home away from home, your cheerleader and personal hero — but working for her is nothing short of a full-time job.

sometimes your bed is a little lonely, when she's not staying the night in it after another rom-com evening, but you really can't think that you'd like someone in it, anyway, much less a stranger. it's hard to explain where your time goes, who it goes with; having to share that with someone, you think, would take more emotional energy than you have right now.

and maybe it also sorta, kinda has to do with the fact that the one and only man you're thinking of outside of work — is the same man you see inside of it every single day.

the very thought of bakugou has your stomach turning, painfully. the image of him in the late afternoons with the sun glowing in his hair, the gentle look he spares you as you wait for the elevator, how he'd looked at you today, when you told him where you and mina were going; you don't know how anyone could make you feel the way he does, at least right now.

the seat across from you is taken up suddenly, then, and you look up into the eyes of someone that looks — nice. a little shy, a little nervous, as they introduce themselves. they decide to pour you a glass of champagne, and they even tell you, openly, voice shaking, how nice you look tonight.

you smile so hard that your cheeks hurt, much to your own surprise.

"i'm actually allergic to strawberries," they tell you with a laugh, gently pushing the bowl closer to you. "that would be a hell of a first date, wouldn't it?"

you agree. "definitely one to remember!"

"well, in that case—" they joke, suddenly leaning forward as if they're going to pull it back towards them, and it's so earnest and sweet that you feel your heartbeat in your throat a bit. "i sound like i'm kissing up to you, but—you have a really nice smile, also."

you have to sit back in your seat, fanning your face dramatically as you both laugh. "wow, i'm not used to someone—"

"time's up, extra."

you blink so hard that your eyes are crossed when you open them, and you look up at the man standing there, waiting for his turn, just as the timer dings and the room comes to life with a bustle. the person across from you only frowns, too timid to say anything in response before they're getting up and casting you a regretful glance. they're barely a foot away before the chair is taken, so aggressively that it scrapes against the floor and shakes the table.

you can't believe what you're seeing. you can't believe bakugou is sitting across from you, right now, ruining everything.

"what—are you doing?" you hiss, though your feelings — with a mind of their own — flutter like butterflies in your stomach at the sight of him.

the scowl he gives you is ugly, as always, but his face is smoother than you remember it being today; freshly shaven, maybe. the cologne he's wearing is strong, woodsy, potent enough that it dizzies you from across the table, that you can only imagine how sweet it smells soaking into the soft skin of his neck. even the shirt he's wearing, you notice, is a button down that you've never seen him in.

"the hell do you mean?" he growls, face pinched as he leans closer, so that his voice doesn't carry as it usually does. "'s'it look like i'm doin'? saving you from some sorry dumbass."

"bakugou," you grit, though the room quiets as everyone takes their seats again, and you have to swallow back your annoyance so you don't draw anymore attention to yourself.

you're not dumb enough to think he'd get away without some people fighting for his attention, too, the same way they did to mina, and — as irritated as you are, suddenly, at his appearance — you're not exactly keen on sharing him, either.

"they were very nice, thank you very much,"

"psh," he rolls his eyes, a muscle in his jaw jumping. "couldn't even look me in the eyes to tell me to fuck off—"

"maybe because they were worried you would blast them through the window—"

"and i would have—"

"oh!" you clench your hands into fists and squeeze your eyes shut, trying to will your anger back down. losing your cool isn't a good look, especially in a room of people that are trying to get to know you. "are you serious right now? why are you here?"

"you really wanna spend our five minutes doin' this?"

and there's something about the way he says it — our five minutes — that has your stomach turning in that horrible way it always does, whenever you bite into the softer parts of him. the look on his face is pensive, nervous if you thought that he was capable of being nervous. his shirt, his shaven cheeks, his alluring cologne; he's here, right now, on a date with you. pushed his way into it, even.

you straighten in your seat and sit back, dropping your eyes to the table, ashamed at the fire you've just thrown at him. "can you at least tell me why you're here in the first place?"

bakugou is silent for long enough that you can't stand not to take him in, how appealing he is to look at, how your heart sings when he looks back. one shake of his head has him sighing and then he's leaning back, too, staring only at the strawberries.

"this is her birthday thing, ain't it?"

"yeah," you murmur in agreement quietly, fiddling with your own fingers in your lap as your nerves harden into bitter disappointment. he's here for the same reasons you are, you tell yourself: for your friend, only.

distantly, you try to remind yourself that this nothing out of the ordinary. that you shouldn't be thinking of him this way, getting so hung-up on someone that's never expressed an interest in you to begin with. there have been a few late night conversations in the stairwell, that ran longer than they should have, that revealed more than they should have — but it doesn't make him yours. not in the way you want it to.

in an attempt to swallow down your own sourness, you reach for a strawberry, picking through them until you find the fattest one, and then bite it to the stem. a little stream of juice sprays out, dripping down over your bottom lip as you scramble for your napkin. you lick after it before patting at your face, spreading the sugar, the sweetness.

bakugou leans across the table so suddenly that you startle, mouth twisted like he's struggling to say what he's about to say. "alright, look—"

the timer rings, horribly, but his ruby stare never dims, never leaves yours and yours never leaves his, either, as if you're both suddenly trapped in a weird limbo of in-between; in-between the quiet moments, in-between the loudest ones, in-between everyone else, together.

and then mina notices.

"oh my god, blasty, you came!" she shouts, springing up from her seat to wave at you both from across the room. her earrings jingle loudly, bracelet beads knocking together as she leans too far to the left, champagne-drunk already. it snaps the moment between you and him, worry filling the gaps as you think about how you're going to get her out of here, once the night is over.

bakugou sinks a little further into his chair, as if it will hide him, before grumbling to himself. cheeks reddening, you realize; strawberry-kissed. he heaves a heavy sigh before digging his fingers into his eyes, deep enough that an ache develops in your own, and he opens his mouth to speak again when someone else approaches the table.

"okay, time to switcheroo!" he sings, grinning too cheerily at you, enough to make you laugh at his enthusiasm.

it darkens bakugou, considerably; "piss off," is all he says, scooting his chair further into the table as if to claim it. he barely gets another word out before the man is starting to protest, and the look he gives him then is awfully viscious: nostrils flared, looking up from beneath his long lashes and furrowed brow, as if this stranger had pissed in your champagne. "i said, fuck off, before i howitzer you through the—"

"okay!" you interrupt, reaching across the table with both hands to close one of bakugou's. his fingers are curled dangerously, and you swear you can see little sizzles of steam slipping between your linked fingers. "let's just—do an extra skip this time, okay? how about you just gives us this one, and you go to the next table?"

the man frowns — which is a bit flattering — but ultimately takes the lifeline you offer, trailing away without another word down to the next table. you can feel the couple on the other side watching you and bakugou now, a little open-mouthed, and your heart quickens at the worry that they're noticing him, that your new five minutes are going to be wasted, too.

—but his hand hasn't moved from yours and his eyes have returned, full to the brim with some emotion you can't read. if you had to guess, you'd say regret, maybe, but you aren't sure how to take that, and so you don't.

you should let him go, literally and figuratively, but the solidity of your logic is no match for the soft beat of butterfly wings in your gut.

"what are you doing?" you ask him again, softly, surely, because you want to hear the answer whatever it is. he either needs to deny you, here and now so you can move on — or he needs to acknowledge the confliction on his face, the soft intertwine of his fingers into yours.

bakugou looks at you now the way he does in the stairwell, the way he does when the sun is painting you warm, too. "i told you," he murmurs, "savin' you from some dumbass."

"but why do you even care?"

another heavy sigh falls from him and you can feel your glass-fragile heart breaking when his hand slips from yours, a little roughly. it surprises you when he grabs the champagne bottle from the center of the table and pours himself a small glass, downing it in one, bitter go before filling up your flute, too.

liquid confidence, maybe; his cheeks darken, noticeably, before he's running a rough hand over his face, still struggling to wash out the words.

"why the hell do you think?" he finally says, though his harsh question lacks the abrasive tone his voice usually has; instead it's gentler, more sincere, bakugou — katsuki — in his rawest form. "why d'you think i do—any of this shit?" one hand waves around to gesture to the span of the dining room, but you know he means more than that, much more. "you think i spend that much time after work just 'cause i have time to waste? jesus."

"i don't know," you say, earning a flat look. "why do you?"

"why do you?"

you take the glass from the center of the table and peer down into it, how it bubbles. maybe you're playing dumb and maybe that's what's really bothering him, but — someone like bakugou deals in absolutes, and you need him to do it now.

the struggle is clear, though, across his face, thickening how he swallows and turning down his lips that much more. you feel a bit bad in the silence, when the timer rings and the muscle in his cheek jumps again.

before anyone can even approach the table, he simply sticks his hand out, and the man beside you was definitely watching on, because he doesn't spare you a glance before going around.

and maybe, you think, decidedly, that's enough.

"because i don't want to go home yet," you tell him honestly, trying to ignore the blood rushing in your ears with his mouth twists and he starts to squirm at your truth. "because i'd rather spend the night with you in a stairwell, than anywhere else."

there's a ludicrous amount of tension that leaves his shoulders then, so much that you didn't notice it until it was gone, and he slumps back into his chair with pink ears, now. the sight makes you smile, widely, as if the sight is a confirmation.

maybe for him, it is.

"yeah, well," he grumbles, eyes dropping to the strawberries before darting away, as if he'd thought of something he shouldn't have. "that's what 'm sayin', too."

"no, you're not!" you laugh, nose crinkling when he side-eyes you with a frown. "you're not hardly saying anything!"

"i'm here, ain't i?" he argues, huffing like a bull. "makin' a damn idiot of myself just to stop you from—"

"—going home with some dumbass?"

"well, yeah!"

"so you want me to be going home with you, then?"

"yeah! no! i mean—" he scowls when you laugh again, lip pulling up over his teeth as if he means to bite into your softest parts, too. the thought is more thrilling that you're willing to admit — at least for now. "quit laughin'!"

but it's not just you; across the dining room, you realize mina's giggling, too, turned around in her seat, ignoring the chatty man that wouldn't shut up about his ex. when bakugou turns around to glare at her, she nearly tips out of her chair by throwing her head too far back, and when he moves to stand up like he needs to help her, all she does is wave at him to turn back around.

and he does, to you, cheeks flaring as he grabs the bottle of champagne again, pouring himself his own glass to glare into. he mutters out another quiet, "jesus" before slamming both his elbows on the table, rudely, and holding his glass up for — what you belatedly realize is — a cheers.

behind him, the afternoon sun has long since set, replaced now by nightfall and stars that shine through the floor-to-ceiling glass windows — but he glows regardless, and the look he gives you is just as warm.