#i hope we see him in the world soul saga at some point

[wp100]

wonder where khadgar's been :p

[askinkiskarma]

ᴋɪɴᴋᴛᴏʙᴇʀ ᴅᴀʏ ᴠ - ᴅᴀᴅᴅʏ ᴋɪɴᴋ

pairing: neteyam x avatar!reader (part of the cardigan saga)

➽ a/n: it's neteyam and atan's world, and we're just living in it! hi besties and welcome to day 5, aka the day that almost killed me bc writing daddy!neteyam is actually much harder to me than i thought it could be. but i wanted so much to give this day to them, since they are my forever favourite pair from my forever favourite work of mine.

you don't have to have read cardigan for this to make sense, although it helps. i hope you enjoy, i've seen a lot of you besties reading cardigan recently and it's nice to know you wouldn't have had to wait as long for this prompt as my og readers, who i've promised this to for far too long hahahhaa my bad.

finally, this will continue in another (or two) kinktober prompts, so enjoyyy ;) x

➽ words: 1.7k words

➽ warnings: it goes without saying, but all of these works (kinktober-related) are smut and therefore minors should NOT interact with them. other warnings include: anal fingering, p in v, pet names, hair pulling.

➽ taglist (x) ➽ kinktober masterlist (x)

➽ na'vi compendium: atan - light, ma 'itan - son, kalin - sweet to the taste

“Come on, ma ‘itan. You have to let go of him at some point, you know?” Letting go of your son was harder on Neteyam than either of you ever envisioned. Well, not really. In truth, he’s always been a born father - loving, caring and attentive, he has been the unofficial parent of three kids ever since he reached puberty, and yet, it’s never made him bitter or deterred. On the contrary, it seemed that the birth of your son, the sweet Kalin, only made him more enthusiastic to put everything he’s learnt about parenthood to good use with his own family. Still, there were times, like right now, where you wanted to remember what it was like to be alone with your mate, the love of your life, the man who you’ve gone trough hell and back with. Solitude was a scarce resource right now, with a babe barely over a year old, but you were lucky to have a village full of people who were more than ready and willing to help babysit, and some who were more excited about it than others - like Neytiri.

“I’ve wanted to have this little one all to myself for so long, we’re going to have so much fun!” Her little coos were adorable and once more you couldn’t help be forever grateful for the person who’s been a mum to you for years now, who loved you and has done so ever since you were born. Although so different, you couldn’t help see your own mother in her, and you were reminded to pay her and your dad a visit at the Tree of Souls. It’s been a while. 

But for now…

“We won’t be too long. Thank you for doing this, sa’nok.” 

“We might be… a little long. Isn’t that so, Atan?”

You chuckled at the quiet desperation in his voice, and, with a roll of your eyes, you clicked in the direction of the tent’s entrance, wordlessly willing him out. This was going to be fun…

It was still risky, coming to the places that used to mean so much to you once, that you had to forsake when you moved to the Metkayina, that you got back once more once you returned home, but you couldn’t help yourselves. Not when these places, this place, in particular, has been one where so many memories, all shared between you two, were made, not when it still brings goosebumps on the surface of your skin, the thought of all you’ve lived through here, from learning how to swim and climb to conceiving your little bundle of joy that was safely back home. You never realised how much being a mother would mean to you - although it was always clear how much being a father meant to Neteyam. You’ve loved him all your life, but somehow never more than when taking care of your son, then when he showered you in love and affection, when he acted like the dad and partner you always knew he would be. 

“I miss this place so much every time we don’t visit for a few days. It’s like after all these years, and all these memories… it’s part of me. It always will be. And even now, I feel like a teenager, obsessed with you, desperate to look into your eyes, excited beyond belief at every glance or touch you send my way.” 

You couldn’t believe how even despite knowing each other since birth, being there for each other every day of your lives, your heart still galloped in your chest any time he spoke, and he still had so much power over you, power to take your breath away with words… and actions.

“Whatever you say… daddy.”

Neteyam turned around almost robotically, alert and frantic as he struggled to make eye contact with you in the least amount of time possible. You chucked at his demeanour, almost predatory, tail perked and unmoving, eyes wide and pupils even more so, swallowing the beautiful yellow of his irises whole. 

“What did you just call me?” 

You smirked and curved an eyebrow in his direction, enjoying the tingly feel that came with doing so, the goosebumps peppered on your skin after being conditioned to expect him to react to it, to unleash on you demons and urges that only you could swallow, only you could help quench. 

“Fuck.” A second later he was by you, and even after a few years in this body, his reflexes still amazed you, still took you by surprise. You gulped at the intensity in his gaze, a gulp that got stuck in your throat as soon as his fingers found your neck, as soon as they wrapped around it and squeezed in just the right way so you felt euphoric, so it felt like the beginning to a night to remember. 

“Atan, you have no idea what you started. But I’ll show you. Let daddy show you.”

His sultry words made your legs clench together, a desperate if futile attempt to cease the dew gathering in your beaded loincloth and seeping past the fabric onto the soft skin of your inner thighs. 

“Turn around.” 

It never took any effort on your part to wholly and relentlessly obey your mate. He loved control and for him, only him, you loved to give it up - you loved it when he manhandled you, his strong, muscular physique perfect for such a task, made to do exactly what he was doing now, spinning you in place and pushing you gently, but forcefully by your shoulder and lower back until you were on the ground, kneeling and waiting. 

“I’m gonna need this perfect little body on all fours, Atan.”

The ground felt moist and tender beneath your hands and knees, and you were so aware of every move, every breath, every fleeting touch of his nimble fingers on your body, slowly making his way from your neck, down your spine until he reached your hips, that he gripped with both his large hands, before giving a praising, appreciative murmur at the sight before him. 

“So, so beautiful. Look at you, spread open for me, making a mess before I even touched you. Daddy’s little slut.”

You nearly snickered at how quickly he adopted and adapted to the nickname, how natural it was, rolling off his tongue, how somehow, every time he said it, you got impossibly wetter, almost panting with the desire to be filled up with his cock, with his cum. You moaned softly when you heard him spit into his hands, and could only imagine the mouthwatering sight unfolding before you as he pumped himself, before plunging into the depths of the desire that would overcome you both. When he guided his rock-hard erection to the plush of your ass, gliding it effortlessly in between your asscheeks, over and over, all you wanted to do was scream for more. It felt wondrous and dirty, and you wanted it all, wanted him everywhere, all at once, all the time. Like the mindreader he always was, he spoke before you had a chance to voice your unrealistic feverous dreams.

“Let’s start with two fingers and work our way up, how’s that sound?” You appreciated him for his thoughtfulness always, but especially now, always ready and dutiful in making sure you were prepared, that your body was capable of taking him, of taking it the way he ended up wanting to give it to you.

“Words, Atan.” 

“Sounds go-good. So good.” 

“That’s right.” 

He was taunting you now, slapping the tip of his cock on your clit, dragging it against your folds before sliding into you with ease, while plunging two fingers into your puckered hole.

“Fu-uck! Fuck! Argh!”

The feeling was beyond comprehension,  beyond your wildest fantasies. It was always this good, always this mind-blowing and yet, you have never gotten used to it, never gotten used to the amalgamation of sensations and how they’d all accumulate to a night of orgasm after orgasm, until you were passed out on his cock, too tired to even mutter a tired I love you.

His hand was soft as it trailed up your body until it reached your braided hair, that he took into his fisted hand. When he tugged on it, as he slammed back into you, you cried out, moaning garbled attempts at his name. Your head pulled backwards as he used your hair to establish a brutal, ruthless pace of both his hips and fingers, and soon enough, you could feel your first orgasm as it approached, thunderous and violent and ready to take over you. 

“I can’t wait to be a dad again, I can’t wait to see your swollen belly and know you have made me the happiest man in the world every day of my life so far and will continue to do so 'til the day I die. I can’t wait to hold your hand when you bring our baby girl into the world.”

“But not tonight, Atan. Tonight, I want to ruin you. I need to ruin you. I need to watch my cum drip out of your every perfect little hole. Do you understand?” 

A meek nod is all you managed, the sensation too overwhelming to allow for any coherent, cohesive expression, the cried-out iteration of “yes, daddy. Yes, fuck, y-yes!” only audible in your head as you screamed it with all your internalised might. 

“Good girl. Come for daddy. I want to hear you, Atan.”

His words were enough to push you over the edge, and you came, vision blinded by the high, mind numbed by the way every nerve in your body felt electrified, alight with the pleasure that didn’t seem to want to cease, not even as you squirted on his cock as he continued to pump into you, the overstimulation enough to make tears fall down your cheeks and onto the ground. 

You didn’t have time to catch your breath, no time to gather any thoughts before he leaned onto your back, whispering seductively in your ear. 

“Ready for round two? You didn’t think I was done with you yet, huh?” 

taglist: @pandoraslxna @sulieykte @blue-slxt @eywaeveng @neteyamsikran @elenamoncada-ibarra @spicymayyo @itsjazzsworld @daddysmurfslefttoenail @eyrina-avatar @iameatingmyhair @hadesbabygurl @linydoll @the-mourning-moon

(pls complete the form in the beginning of this post to be tagged)

[name-esfandiar]

Fantasy writer presentation

I started posting about the tolkien persian translations, but why I'm really here is to talk about my writing. I'll try to keep it short, but if it tickles your interest I'd love if we could follow each other :)

I'm a young french writer that's working on a universe since 6 years.

I'm truly into high fantasy and dark fantasy, although I write less of the second kind. I've got a number of inspirations, some less obvious than other like George RR Martin, Tolkien, Sanderson, even Lovecraft or french writers like Camus or Céline.

What deeply compels me to write is my fascination for the human character and its limits, delving into it as much as in an introspective manner as with tangible actions (e. g. fights that act as much as talking than does dialogues).

If your interest is stricken, you can continue to read to see in more detail what i write

This post is peculiar, in the futur I will talk more about my process, what i like and dislike, my philosophy, my goals, my inspirations, some analysis even ! I can't thank you enough for reading :)

My books

The universe I was talking about was at the start a ttrpg for my friends, but since then its has became a fully wrote novel of a high fantasy saga, the following up book that has been started and a new one that I'm currently writing, with the utmost desire of being published.

The Mirrored Path

The Mirrored Path is a high fantasy saga set in this said universe, where Blades rules over all. The four Blades, each sealing one of the Goddesses, hold a power than should've never came into mortal hands.

Three storylines are deeply intertwined.

Fansislas, a farmer, goes into the capital to address to the king of the Ances Holy-Kingdom the problems his city encounters, when at the same time a member of bourgeoisie, Gadolt, reveals himself be a Blade's holder… without the Goddess with it. Unfortunate pair, they will have to cross the continent in order to keep the secret and not be condemned to die, with only one goal : finding the Goddess linked to it in order to use it side by side with the Blade of the king against the Eimin Empire.

The smart and esteemed impress of the Eimin Empire, Alba, finds one of those Blades, and the Goddess linked. As her soul and memories merge with those of the Goddess, she fights as much now against Ances the Holy-Kingdom than a past one against her new memories. Between betrayals and various political games, she raise a host and swear to put an end to the Ances Holy-Kingdom.

On the other of the ocean, Alíyei, a wandering princess, two brothers, Belor and Toga, and a wandering prince, Shirvim — perfect in the eyes of Alíyei, symbole of all her weaknesses, pushing her to betray him to get rid of the pain — stride through the desert. She tries to raise a sell word company in view of the rising tension between the Ances Holy-Kingdom and the Eimin Empire, to defend her country against the possible war.

All are linked in a terrible fate, that they glimpse between dreams and visions, ignoring that the world is entering a new era.

The War's Song

Set in the same universe, 53 years before The Mirrored Path, this is a standalone book.

The story follows Aderon, king and Blade holder of the Ances Holy-Kingdom and his First Counsellor, Notora. Meeting for the first time in history another Blade holder, new players will emerge, a new tension stirred ; for Aderon is not the sole bearer of the divine power, the very reason the Crown holds its dominion.

Notora, seeing changes appear in her king, is troubled. It's her mission to avoid a war that he seems too inclined to declare, for any conflict between such weapons would be the end of any who does not bear them.

History will know this event as the one that stained the world by an unquenchable mark.

I hope you will like it or at least be interested, I'd love to follow and get to know more writers, fantasy or no ! If you're french, bonus points :)

I'll post about things more deep in the future as my philosophy about writing, my reasons of doing it, what I like and dislike, some analysis maybe and translations !

[mozart-the-meerkitten]

Hello there! I have been a fan of the Wingfeather saga series for 3 years, (and the animated series since they where aired on YouTube) and I found your fanfics on Ao3 about a year and a half ago. I just wanted to tell you that I think you are an amazing writer, and a really great Wingfeather fan :)

One thing I was wondering, what exactly was it that made Artham your favorite character? For me, it probably would've been his dynamic. Or maybe the way he was written. I'm honestly not sure lol

Hi and first of all THANK YOU SO MUCH. I’m so happy to hear you like my stories and think I’m a good Wingfeather fan. Just, just trust me when I say that means a lot to me, I always feel like I'm not doing enough, so thank you <3

Okay so I’ve been ruminating on this question for a while, because it deserves a good answer and I love my boy a lot. (also I just really appreciated the nice comments and wanted to keep staring at the ask for a while) I am going to attempt to answer it tonight though!

So, first, Artham is just very much the kind of character I like. Tragic backstory? mentally ill? loyal to an absolute fault? loves children? kind? incredible fighter? He’s all of these things and many more and these are traits I love a lot in characters.

Second, Andrew writes him really, really well. He feels so human and so real, like he’s an actual person I could be friends with (and hug). His struggles remind me of my own- he gets better and then slides backwards, he tries so hard to help the people he cares about but doesn’t always know how to do that. He wants so badly to be with his family and to be loved but doesn’t feel worthy of any of that. I love, love, LOVE that he doesn’t lose his mental illness after his transformation. I was so scared that it was just gonna disappear in book three AND THEN IT DIDN’T and I was so happy, because that’s something that happens a lot with characters in media these days- their trauma/mental illness just magically disappears and that’s not how real life works! But Artham doesn’t have that happen even though magic is involved and I love that.

Related to that second point is that I find him both relatable and encouraging. I relate to his struggles with anxiety, depression, trying to cope with past mistakes, blaming myself for things I can’t control or fix… and I find it comforting that the books show that as Sara puts it, “even the noblest soul can be broken”. We are all broken, we have all made mistakes and fallen, even those of us with noble hearts and the best of intentions, and we can come out of that. We can go on living and still find love and kindness and support from people. It’s both solidarity and a reminder that there’s some good in the world, and it’s worth fighting for.

Idk, I just draw a lot of hope from Artham and what happened to him- which sounds silly because he’s a fictional character, but human beings often process real life experiences through stories so- I keep repeating this phrase to myself, it’s kind of become my mantra, “don’t give up before you get your wings”. Because, in book 2, Artham is ready to give up, he DOES give up, and it is at that very moment that he sees Tink and all of a sudden he has a reason to live again and he FIGHTS for it, and it turns out that he was meant to be there all along to save Tink AND to be transformed and have his mind restored. And I try to remember that because I’m going through a lot of crap and I feel like giving up a lot, but remembering that maybe I’m right where I need to be, maybe if I just keep holding on a little longer I’ll get my wings- that something good will come from this- and that helps.

So, uh, yeah. I could probably go on but I think that covers most of it.

TLDR: Artham is a character I love a lot because I relate to him and I love the kind of character he is (loyal, kind, brave, and somehow so, so soft despite everything). I’m drawing a lot of hope from this fictional character and his story. He is the best boy <3

[doog20]

Waymond

So i have been rewatching Everything Everywhere All at Once, on repeat since i watched when it released, its become a sort of comfort movie. i can recite the lines from this movie 1:1 if that gives you an indecation of how much i have seen this. anyways thats besides the point, i wanted to chat about comic releaf and how this movie does it perfectly with Waymond.

by the way, pls bear with me, my writing style is more narrative based than anything else. think of this as a trip into my brain lol <3

life is hard, we all deal with it in different ways. some people deal with it dead on, and try to analyse it all, and decided things based on facts. but some, some very interesting souls, wholeheartedly reject this and seek wholeness in the fact that they dont need to see it all to understand it all. i myself probably fit somewhere in the middle, i feel very happy when i understand things and try my hardest to understand alot of things. but i find alot of safety in the idea that there are just some things that need to be joked about and not analysed at all.

When we meet Waymond he is in a bad place, his marriage is falling apart, his daughter and wife are feuding and to put a cherry on the top of this cake he is ablivious to this all, instead living life as if it was fine, its not, but he is still dancing and making costumers laugh.

Waymond fits into group 2, the people that dont need to know everything, everywhere all at once (see what i did there). BUT this must NOT be taken as these people not understanding the world or being somehow stupider bc they pick a different path. rather it should be taken as just another way to exist.

many comic releaf characters are only that, no 3 dymentionality, just there to cut the tension. this used to work well when movies were shorter and not as in demand. as we start to see things over and over they get boring, we all know this. the thing is though, we need comic releaf in every movie somewhere.

okay lets do an exercise, think of your favourite movie, now think of any scene in that movie serious or otherwise, i can take a shot in the dark and say that if you told a friend about this scene alone they wouldnt think much of it, bc they dont have context, they dont have a build up to any of this. now take a scene that has a moment of comic releaf, and tell this to your metaphorical friend about this scene, i can say with 90% confidence that they will for sure understand that scene better. what i am trying to say is that comic releaf makes things more palettable.

Waymond for almost the whole movie is kind of a joke... he isnt very serious and when he is its out of character for him, but come the 3rd act and its revealed that Waymond is doing all of this by choice, as the world just needs googly eyes every now and then.

this reveal hits so well on 3 levels. level 1 it informs the viewers more on Waymond and forces a reevaluation of him, level 2 it changes how Michelle Yeoh's character, Evelyn looks at he current situation and level 3 makes the comic releaf 3D!!! not only is he doing this to make it easier on himself but also on everyone else. this builds his character of just being a father and caring person, even with his costumers, he is just doing this to make them happier.

when i look at this movie a few things come to mind, 2 scenes the intro to the rocks where its just silence and text to read, the whole saga with the sausage fingers and Waymond as a character.

in closing, im very happy that The Daniels made this. this movie that was really funny, really insightful and really did give me my favourite character in movie history. I wish the them all the best and hope they keep knocking out BANGERS like this one

anyways thanks for reading, hope you have a good day :3

okay so that was really nice to write out, i havent been able to flex my writing muscles for a while, i am dyslexic and its just very energy consuming but very very fun to do when it comes together. its been real, doog signing off

[theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin]

Thoughts on the ship Rosalie/Bella?

While it’s a nice thought, sadly, I don’t think either Rosalie or Bella are what the other would ever seek in a partner.

Indeed, I think the other would be too close of a reminder to what they see in the worst of themselves. So, even in better circumstances, I don’t think they’d choose each other.

Let’s break that down.

What is Rosalie Looking For?

Rosalie’s past is one filled with brutal trauma, betrayal, and heartbreak. She has been violated by men in the worst of ways, betrayed by the man she thought would be her husband, and then has the surreal experience of being turned into something that, while alive, is not human.

She romanticizes the human life she could have had, clinging to it, never acknowledging that circumstances were such that she never would have had it.

Rosalie never was going to get that simple future of being a humble, good, simple man’s wife with beautiful children and a comfortable life. She was raised in society, uncommonly beautiful and charming, and was set to marry the wealthiest man she could. It might not have been Royce, she could have married a good man, but she would have married into this wealthy world and not ended up with someone like Emmett.

I think this is very telling.

For very understandable reasons, Rosalie has never confronted nor truly gotten over her trauma. Oh, she murdered her rapists and murderers, and put their deaths behind her, she married Emmett and has a (fairly) good relationship with him, but she hasn’t taken her full final steps to recovery.

I think this in part shows in her ending up with a guy like Emmett.

Emmett’s not bad, don’t get me wrong, but it’s very telling in what he loves of Rosalie and that Rosalie loves him for it.

He worships her beauty above all other things and is described as a very simple but pleasant and laidback guy. I think Rosalie is at the point where she wants to be worshipped, especially for the quality that was most valued in her human life, her beauty.

She wants to be with someone safe, someone who loves her, and that someone is definitely Emmett.

I think in the short run this works out very well for the pair of them and perhaps even in the long run. I think both could have chosen a better partner.

Rosalie is complicated, she’s not the shallow vain bitch Edward complains she is nor is she what Emmett seems to see her as. Emmett doesn’t really get his wife, or defend her all that much, he’s in love with her beautiful cheerleader persona. Rosalie, similarly, is in love with this man whose greatest attribute is his love of her. I’m sure there are moments she finds Emmett rather boorish and slow on the uptake.

What Do I Think Rosalie Needs?

To be honest, of all the characters where I raise my eyebrow at Meyer putting them with someone of the opposite gender, Rosalie’s one of the ones where they raise the highest.

Even Carlisle, when Rosalie drags in this man’s bleeding carcass, goes, “Oh, is this your cousin?” And has a “Him?!” moment when Rosalie explains this is her new husband.

I always would have expected, especially after her experiences, for Rosalie to be with a woman. That said, I do think her society’s prejudices and expectations would be a huge barrier for her and she’d have to do a lot of character growth before this would ever be possible. And I mean a lot of character growth, as in, Rosalie hasn’t reached this point even post Twilight saga.

Right, regardless of gender, I think Rosalie needs a partner who a) understands her b) does not value her looks c) accepts the good and the bad parts of her.

Like all of us, Rosalie is flawed. She’s a very impressive, down right intimidating, woman who has an iron clad will and gets what she wants. She has a deep love for her family and a great capacity for compassion. However, there are times when she’s the sixteen-year-old girl who has very much not escaped her society’s mindset. She fully advocates Bella Swan’s murder so the family won’t have to move, not realizing until Carlisle points it out that this is a heinous thing to do. Rosalie says vicious, racist, things to Jake likely never realizing exactly what it is she’s saying. She’s stubborn, proud, and as Edward put it a bit pig-headed.

Emmett tends to just go “Yeah, she’s a bitch, but she’s my bitch”. Which... great, thanks Emmett, that’s very helpful.

Bella Swan is Not That Person

Bella per the start of the series is a seventeen-year-old girl with cripplingly low self-esteem, huge parental issues, and a dangerous inclination towards depression.

Bella shows serious interest in women sexually (her relationship with Alice has some serious homoerotic undertones) but she’s also very intimidated by them. Rosalie, especially, makes Bella evaluate and feel worse about herself as she knows she will never be as beautiful as this teenage blonde goddess.

In other words, this Bella is not in a position to be the kind of person Rosalie needs. She’s too caught up in figuring out who she herself is, cares very much about Rosalie’s appearance and using it to compare against her own, and isn’t stable enough to be what Rosalie needs.

And by the end of canon... Well... Bella’s left the planet and will soon join Esme in being a hauntingly strange person entirely divorced from reality.

What if we’re in a slightly AU world?

Well, we’re banking on a lot of character development for Bella that I don’t believe can happen with Edward around. Either Bella shows interest in Edward or, well, he eats her. (No, seriously, this is canon, both Alice and Edward confirm as much.) 

And if the family packs up and leaves during New Moon and never comes back... Well, of all the people Bella might end up with after that, I think Rosalie might just be the least likely (not to mention Rosalie would not be down for hanging around Edward’s stupid human girlfriend).

What is Bella Looking For?

Bella’s looking for validation of her very self. She wants to be loved, more than that, she wants to be worth something.

Bella has such a low opinion of herself that, at this point in her life, she needs this feeling to come from elsewhere. She finds this in both Edward and Jacob.

And it doesn’t matter how scary they are (and both are, indeed, very scary towards her), it doesn’t matter what it is they value, just that they both seem to want her even though she’s a foolish, clumsy, pale, ugly, human, nobody, loser. 

That’s all Bella wants.

Edward’s a perfect storm in that he’s inhumanly perfect, beautiful beyond all comprehension, and completely obsessed with her. In Edward’s eyes, Bella is not just perfect, she’s fascinating.

And then, of course, she’s not and it utterly destroys her. 

Basically, Bella’s is a very sad life.

What Does Bella Need?

Bella needs time to grow up and find out who she is and how to value that.

Bella is your very typical teenage girl. She’s precocious, has a lot of issues growing up with her mom, but she has a lot of issues many teenage girls do have.

I think, before Bella can find a truly good partner, she needs to learn how to value herself.

This will be painful and take a lot of time. In New Moon, I think Jake actually sets her back as she uses him to find value in herself for her (essentially replacing Edward).

Only after Bella discovers who she is, reaffirms why she is important and worthy of love, can she find someone.

What does that person look like?

Well, it sure as fuck isn’t Vampire Patrick Bateman, otherwise known as Edward Cullen. Nor is it Jake Black who sexually assaults her, tells her to kiss him or he’ll kill himself, then tells her that her dying is pointless as it means he and Edward fought over nothing. 

It also isn’t Alice, who treats Bella a lot like she would a life-sized Barbie Doll rather than a friend and a human being.

I’m not sure who it is, to be honest.

Someone who recognizes who Bella is, certainly, the good and the bad. Someone who is able to... reconcile her with the world she truly lives in. Maybe, circumstances changing around a bit, it’s Carlisle Cullen? (Though that would certainly be a dumpster fire of divorce and despair with Edward and Esme) Maybe it’s Jasper (also a dumpster fire of divorce and despair with Edward and Alice)? 

I really have no idea here. Unlike Rosalie, I can’t even tell you what this person would need to be like.

What I do know is...

Rosalie is Not That Person

Just as Bella views Rosalie as a threat, as something to measure herself against and feel unworthy of in every way, Rosalie does the same.

Bella is a pretty human woman who captures Edward’s attention in a way she never can. Rosalie, at the time we start canon, for all her accomplishments and all she’s done is still insecure enough that she needs to be the prettiest woman in the room. 

Just as Bella’s not secure enough to be what Rosalie needs, Rosalie is not secure enough to be what Bella needs.

Rosalie also doesn’t see Bella for what she is. Rosalie sees, at first, a normal boring human teenager and dismisses her. She falls into the typical Cullen trap (for all but Carlisle) that they forget humans are people too. Later, Bella discounts Rosalie’s very earnest advice and Rosalie never forgives her for it. This is understandable, Rosalie lays her soul bare, but she forgets Bella’s a teenage girl and more can’t see what Bella herself is battling with.

Bella thinks being human is worthless because Bella thinks being Bella is worthless. Children and a human future mean nothing to her.

It would take a lot, A LOT, of character development for Rosalie to be someone that Bella needs in this situation and even then... Well, they’d have to deal with the horrifying shit show that is Edward. Because if Edward/Bella isn’t happening...

It’s lunch time.

TL;DR

I’d say pin your hopes on Alice/Bella, except that one’s not happening either for all that they do have their very homoerotic friendship.

[ariainstars]

Will Din Djarin and Grogu Have to Part?

Since this question has been discussed quite controversially in the fandom since the second season of The Mandalorian, here are my two cents about it. 

Luke and Anakin

A subject my husband and I can’t agree upon 😉 is the character of Luke Skywalker. I always liked him, while my husband finds him annoying. But consider: Luke’s hotheadedness, his naivety, his obstinacy, are perfectly normal for a young man of nineteen or twenty. Given A New Hope’s roots in classic Western, Luke is the typical greenhorn, who tries to man it up but doesn’t know how to do it yet. Luke is a normal adolescent with dreams and ambitions. Remember how we see him playing with a toy skyhopper at his uncle’s homestead? He obviously feels safe there. His aunt and uncle later even sacrifice their lives rather than revealing to the Imperial stormtroopers where R2D2 is, because they know that Luke went in search of the droid, and they don’t want them to find him. Luke is a good boy though raw and green. In the end, his story is a success because he chooses to use his powers to save the ones he cares about, even when it’s a father who, except for saving his life at the last moment, never did anything good for him.

Now compare him to Anakin Skywalker, his father, at the same age: many fans define young Anakin as a whiny, arrogant brat and they’re not so wrong with that. Anakin comes over as an irritating person, much more so than his son, because he is emotionally stunted, having spent the last ten years being told to stifle his emotions and not to allow any personal attachment. Which blatantly failed: we see right away that his bond with Padmé is still intact although they didn’t meet in the meantime, and we witness him getting mad with fury and hatred when his mother has to die in that cruel, meaningless way when he could have saved her had he arrived just a little sooner. Young Anakin is unbalanced and frustrated because by now he knows his enormous powers but is not allowed to use them in a way that actually makes sense to him. Anakin is a family man: his instinct is to protect. But at age nineteen, thanks to the uncompassionate mindset of the oh-so wise Jedi, he already is a ticking bomb.

Now to Our New Heroes…

While the first season was about Mando’s redemption and hero’s journey, the second one thematizes the development of the child. Until now he hardly wielded the Force and most of the time he’s just being cute and getting into trouble, but that’s not simply bothersome, nor is it unfitting for the narrative: it’s normal. Grogu is being a child at last, because he can, and he can because someone is looking after him and genuinely caring for him.

Look at him: the little cookie monster is having a blast. He’s meeting people and making friends. He’s enjoying life (including food). He can let go, because he knows that “daddy” has his back. Literally!

Which is why I don’t believe that Grogu will choose to join some Jedi or other: it would be pointless for his story. Grogu has the chance to be the child he could not be until now, and since he thankfully ages slowly, he’s taking that chance. Like with his predecessor Yoda, there is more to Grogu than meets the eye: he understands more than he lets on. He’s making experiences, and he’s learning from these experiences. Instinctively, he wants Mando because he wants belonging. My take is that he will learn how to have healthy attachments, and that if he is to be the future Yoda in some distant new tv show or new trilogy, he will be very different from this one in that he won’t discourage Force-sensitive children from learning how to love other people in a proper way. Also, Yoda lived mostly at the Jedi temple, which from the outside reminded of an ivory tower and indeed did shield the Jedi from seeing many of the ugly things happening outside. Grogu is travelling: he witnesses the injustices in the galaxy with his own eyes. 

One of the crucial messages of the Star Wars saga always was how wrong it is to separate families. Palpatine’s greatest villainy was making people who belonged together mistrust one another until they resorted to violence. What’s worse, he enjoyed it.

To remain in balance, children need to grow up serene and protected. Anakin, the Dark Father, was the most blatant example for this: his mere existence was a living proof for the Jedi’s failure. Terrified of his former padawan’s turn to the Dark Side, Obi-Wan set the seal on his fate right when Padmé was succeeding into making him go away with her. The Jedi was aware that Anakin was a husband and future father at this point, but the convictions of the Jedi had been so deeply ingrained into his mind since he was small that he believed them to be more important than Anakin’s role not as a Jedi, but as a human being. Still twenty years later, he tried to trick Anakin’s own son into killing him. Anakin’s soul was saved, though only by a hair’s breadth, due to his son’s stubborn compassion. Anakin had been willing to sacrifice everything to save his wife; Luke chose to rather give up his life than his integrity, which is why the moment when he throws his light sabre away before Palpatine is so significant, setting him apart from Anakin.

None of the surviving Jedi would have lifted a finger for Anakin: to them, he was a damned man. Which he was, but that was largely also due to the Jedi’s sins and not only his own. They never showed regret or assumed that they might have wronged him. The aim of both the prequel and sequel trilogy was not to excuse Darth Vader’s / Anakin Skywalker’s or Kylo Ren’s / Ben Solo’s terrible deeds, but to demonstrate that their fate could have been avoided; that they were not alone with their guilt but had been for a large part pushed into their role by their environment, instead of being, as the cliché runs, “mad guys who choose to be evil because they want power”, like e.g. in a James Bond movie. (Except of course for Palpatine, but even he got a second chance through Rey, equally powerful but much more well-meaning than him.)

Conclusions

The message of Star Wars is not about the all-powerful Jedi and the significance of their order: they are not some kind of superheroes who will return and save the galaxy. I daresay that who hopes to see Luke Skywalker, e.g. instructing Grogu, will be bitterly disappointed. If Luke would enter the narrative, the story would become about him, making the show’s set-up and title pointless. His story, the Hero’s Journey, was accomplished with Return of the Jedi, which is why George Lucas never wrote a continuation. Luke himself developed his capacities instinctively, both Obi-Wan and Yoda had little time to train him. (So much also for Rey being “a Mary Sue who knows how to wield her power without training”.) It obviously does not take years and years of learning at a Jedi temple to learn to wield one’s Force powers: it appears that what padawans are taught there, more than anything else, is how to control their feelings. Which is unrealistic on the long run, because every living being wishes for personal fulfilment and even the greatest Jedi can’t live solely for others.

Will the child’s Force abilities fade in time without training, the way Ahsoka said? They won’t. The show is set some 25 years after the fall of the Jedi Temple, and yet Grogu managed to make a mudhorn float in the air with his power. He was exhausted afterwards, but he managed. In another episode he healed Greef Karga from a mortal wound and he is the first Force-sensitive whom we ever saw with this capacity. In the next episode he rejected a fireball with his bare hands. The Force is strong with this one. He does not need a Jedi master to train him. What he needs is to develop a good judgement about what he should use his powers for, and when he should not. 

The saga as a whole always showed a clear structure where the puzzle pieces fit together, adding up to one final picture: life is not about power but about love and belonging. Power can win, but that victory is always short-lived. Who chooses power over compassion in the end will always lose and have to look back on a destroyed world where there are only losses and bitter memories.

Ever from the first episode, The Mandalorian lived from the dynamics between the gruff but kind bounty-hunter and the innocent yet powerful child. At its core, it is a father-son relationship: tear them apart and the whole story ceases to make sense. By the beginning of season 2 Din Djarin and Grogu have grown so close that you could hardly fit a sheet of paper between them. Their story is not about rebuilding the Jedi order, it is about healing together, overcoming loneliness and trauma, starting a new life together. 

Maybe they will be separated at the end of the second season, e.g. by Moff Gideon who wants the child for his despicable experiments: but if that happens, I can foretell what the next season will be about: 

Mando will move heaven and hell to get “his” child back under his protection. Because contrarily to both Luke and Anakin, he is a father, and a good and devoted one at that.

[coolfire333]

MAJOR deltarune chapter 2 spoilers below the cut!!! 

But here are my thoughts, I didn’t think to type this up as a live-reaction type thing until late in the game so some of this is typed up as I go but most will probably come after I’ve finished

Ok first off, I love the aesthetics of chapter 2 so much!! The first chapter was really good too (I am a sucker for card game aesthetics what can I say) but the music, the enemies, the atmosphere is just so fantastic in part 2.

Toby (and Temmie since I know she does a lot of the spritework and designing) and whoever else was working on this did such an excellent job

I also got stupidly excited over the fact that the original Starwalker joined our inventory and I about died when they started walking behind us. I love the little icon in the menu and it’s really Pissing me off that they couldn’t join the party for real. Original Starwalker appreciation post :)

ALSO unrelated to this area but guys try to go all the way to the bottom of the yellow car traffic puzzle. It’s hard but there is a Funny there, please trust me it’ll be worth it. 

You have to be careful when timing the lights (I think I stopped the red cars before the yellow) and try not to bump into anything so Kris doesn’t lose their speed when trying to get there.

Speaking of dudes who I love, Spamton is absolutely supreme, I seriously cannot get enough of this guy. I didn’t think to start this post until after I fought him so I don’t have any images but his theme music is awesome.  

I don’t care if he’s super sketchy and questionable I’m giving him all my kromer. Going to become a big shot. Also the menu outside the shop isn’t lying his potions really do poison you inside and outside of battle lol

I’m stuck doing his basement puzzle because I have no spatial awareness so I keep dying to the bullets on the teacup ride back up. I’m nervous because this situation is just reminding me of the Jevil fight, I hope whatever secret miniboss comes out of this has a little mercy on me. 

And I don’t fully remember but I think when you first talk to him about the Knight he mentions a “clown,” does he know Jevil? He seems like the kind of character who knows more about things than he should, much like Jevil or Seam. 

Also interesting is the fact that if you go back to the shopkeepers in the city, Kris seems to say something about Spamton to them and they either deny knowing him or say that they refuse to bring his name up ever again. Hm. Someone who’s done a lot more digging into this game can probably make a good theorypost about him but there’s weird stuff here

Also the Queen is so hilarious. God just look at these portraits, they laugh at you when the song in this room gets to the point where the Queen laughs, and I love that detail :)

I hate to make the homestuck comparison but she reminds me of a cross between Kanaya and Roxy and knowing Toby’s homestuck background I do wonder about that. Also more nice comparison to superstar saga but her theme song kinda gives me Cackletta vibes. She is great :)

Also I thought that maybe based on her design that she was supposed to be Lancer’s mom, like the Spade Queen or something, but Lancer didn’t make any comments to suggest that? It does make me wonder where the remaining queens and jacks are, if there are any. 

We see the rest of the kings locked in the basement of the palace (later in Ralsei’s house too), and when looking at Lancer in the overworld inventory it says he’s the jack of spades, so do the other kings have sons? Are there queens too? I’m really curious about this.

Later addition #1: Spamton neo battle?????? He can turn your soul yellow!! New soul mechanics holy crap :0

His earlier theme also reminded me of the songs in undertale associated with the ghosts/dummies, the fact that he has even more callbacks to Mettaton in his later battle is very interesting. This song really reminds of “Ghost Fight” from undertale too. ALSO I can hear the same melody from “The World Revolving” in one section of this song too........REALLY interesting.

Same line as in the Jevil battle too....hmmm :/

Also what is “the power of NEO”? Second time this has been mentioned in the ut/dr series, and iirc Mettaton neo only shows up in a no mercy run? Really really odd stuff happening here

And this is a new game over screen than the usual chapter 2 one! It also says “Please, don’t give up!” after this. I didn’t recognize the text’s voice either...and I feel like the music is slightly different? Not totally sure. If anyone else has thoughts on this let me know. I’m probably gonna be seeing this screen a lot though, Spamton’s hard lol but I still think he’s really cool

OH and after dying a lot (idk how many times lol) it says “Come on, that all you got!? Kris, get up...!” hm, still unsure who this voice is...maybe Ralsei? It’s high pitched but I’m not fully sure it’s high enough to be him speaking

Later addition #2: God that battle was unsettling. “Spamton begs to the audience. Spamton prays to the audience.” is such a haunting line. And the ending...man. Really creeps me out. 

I have the dealmaker glasses now though so that’s pretty sweet. I wore the mannequin with Kris thinking it might do something in battle with him but I still have no idea what it does unless the effect was really subtle. If someone knows what the mannequin does I’d love to hear it. Also I hope we get to see the optional bosses again, I really like Spamton and Jevil...bring them back :(

Later addition #3: WOAH ok sounds like Spamton was making weird deals with Gaster?? Maybe Jevil was too, Spamton does mention a “clown” in his neo fight and he seems pretty upset with the notion that he is a “clown” so maybe Gaster is the one making all sorts of weird alliances with the secret bosses?

Anyway, all the shopkeepers left to gather outside Spamton’s shop in the trash dump and they’re all talking about him, it’s actually sad to hear his backstory...but the last one mentions a phone in Spamton’s room being left off the hook, and when they listened to whoever was on the other end they say “There was nothing but garbage noise.” which is similar to the “It’s nothing but garbage noise.” text that shows up when you try using the phone in the dark world. HMMMMM. 

Later addition #4: 

ROUXLS KAARD!!!!

Also idk if I fully trust Ralsei (we don’t know much about him at all and when chapter 1 came out I read an analysis of him that compared him a lot to early-game Flowey so I’m suspicious of his kindness) but this boat ride was sweet.

Does Ralsei have a little crush on Kris?? I might have been reading into it too much, I’m bad at seeing this kind of thing so idk maybe he just wants to be their friend and feels all sweetly about that but he was very much complimenting Kris a lot and blushing a ton on this boat ride lol

OH MY GOD YES IT’S THE MACHINE TO THRASH MY OWN ASS (almost forgot I made it bi pride edition LOL)

Also actual RK battle heck yeah!!!!

Later addition #5: Berdly has a crush on Susie. Oh my god. I guess that’s kinda cute that he likes her since she was actually genuinely nice to him but oh my god no. I will say that even though I didn’t like Berdly at first, his speech about being the “smart kid” was very emotionally resonant, I really feel for him and Noelle, and he seems like he’s got a good heart. But dude maybe don’t go after Susie (and maybe talk a little less too haha)

Later addition #6:

DUDE this battle music!! This was a really cool battle omg

Ralsei is starting to concern me, idk I’m still kinda suspicious of whatever is going on

Later addition #7: I love how the town now looks omg

They’re all back!!! I love the music vendors :)

Later addition #8: Um so I got to the ending of chapter 2. Hm. I have to think about this for a while. 

But I really enjoyed this game!!! I might boot up another save file so I can fool around with it more, but this was such a blast! :)

[theloverofdragons]

kinda want to write a reverse soulallies au where the hero bonds with pandora and tomix bonds with aegis

• tomix sends the hero to the plane of elemental spirits to find a soulally when they come across pandora being chased, like in canon, but instead of being interrupted by aegis, they find her and help her out, scaring off whatever’s chasing her (perhaps other spirits??? tomix and aegis mention in canon that the other spirits would pick on her)

• the hero offers to escort her back to the safety of her domain, which she agrees to, and as they’re making their way back and talking, the hero mentions that they’re currently looking for a soulally; pandora, grateful for how they helped her, says she would be willing to be their soulally only...

• ...at which point uthuluc is accidentally released

• even though they can’t do much in their soul form, the hero still prepares to fight uthuluc to keep pandora and the other spirits safe, when aegis arrives and freezes it like in canon

• when he turns to find out who’s responsible, he’s rather surprised to see the hero standing next to pandora, and is caught up to speed on how the hero helped her and was willing to fight uthuluc, and how they’re looking for a soulally

• pandora tells aegis that she had offered as she wanted to help them like they helped her, before the situation with uthuluc, but only if the hero is willing to bond with her despite the risks

• the hero is willing, and aegis pretty much gives them his blessing, reasoning that it will be good for pandora to have someone else befriending and looking after her (and being a soulally means she’s less likely to venture out of her domain and accidentally cause trouble)

• the hero and pandora bond and the hero returns to ravenloss and tomix, who was getting a little worried with how long they were in the plane of elemental spirits and is, suffice to say, rather surprised to find out who the hero’s new soulally is

• so now he’s training the hero as a soulweaver - although under the rules of edelia, they’re technically a chaosweaver - who is bonded to the founder of the chaosweavers, who is the one who also released the seven corrupt spirits, who tomix is hunting

• the irony is not lost on him

• pandora and the dragon get on surprisingly well, finding common ground in that they’re both theoretically meant to be evil - the world destroyer and founder of the chaosweavers - but are bonded to the hero and working on the side of good

• tomix and the hero return to mystlyk museum to retrieve pandora’s cube, whereupon tomix meets pandora properly for the first time, and after some initial awkwardness, end up getting along well

• the hero returns to the surface and continues with their quest to get the elemental orbs before sepulchure, weaving with pandora by their side, remaining in her cube 

• then the final thirteenth happens, all the hero’s friends and allies are here as sepulchure makes his big push to obtain the orbs; the falconreach guardian tower and lady celestia are lost, the hero fights sepulchure and loses badly

• the doomknight is approaching the fallen hero, seemingly ready to strike the final blow, pandora is panicking for the safety of the hero, her bonded soulweaver, one of her only friends, and manifests in the material world...

• ...and seppy winds up tripping over his own feet

• after all, if your presence in the physical world causes misfortune, you might as well use it to your advantage where you can

• the rest of book one and book two play out as they do in canon, and when the hero is frozen by jaania, pandora retreats to her domain in the plane of elemental spirits to mourn with her only visitor being aegis

• she can’t break the hero out of the ice; the magic is too strong and she’d probably wind up making things worse, so she’ll trust the dragon to guard the crystal and will monitor from afar through their bond, ready to reunite with the hero when they break free, because they WILL break free no matter how long it takes

• during this time, tomix comes to the plane of elemental spirits to find a new soulally after aspar/envy disappears, where he comes across aegis, who has heard about his quest from pandora, and respects his commitment to righting his wrongs by completing his quest to banish the corrupt spirits, and the two bond

• the two of them will also visit pandora in her domain, to keep her company and to talk; aegis offers to try and break the hero out of the ice but, like in canon, he is unable to, so they have to wait

• of course, the hero is eventually freed from the ice and returns to ravenloss, reuniting with tomix, pandora and aegis, and are off again to build a ship to sail into the void and stop envy

• when heading to edelia, tomix hopes that the topic of which spirit the hero is bonded to doesn’t come up, what with the headmaster being bonded to baltael, and the possibility of oyva and her soulsmith being there, and an impromptu family reunion may not go too well 

• aegis’ scenes of being the lookout on the ship, making the map of the ynnungaap, etc. are the same only with tomix rather than the hero, who gets a twinge of sadness, wondering whether his bond with aspar was as real as his one with aegis

• as in canon, when the hero and tomix step foot on the island in the void, all of pandora’s memories come flooding back to her and she tells them the truth about aspar and how she believes it is her fault, so she will do her best to help them put an end to his evils

• after defeating green, red and blue, tomix synchronises with aegis and shoots off to confront envy, joined by the hero shortly afterwards, forcing envy out of his ‘human’ body

• again, the following scene plays out as in canon with envy taking over tomix’s body, forcing the hero to fight him and attempts full synchronisation, only to be interrupted by pandora who was able to temporarily ‘jump’ into tomix’s body

• she distracts envy with her speech about how despite his evils, she still loves him, allowing aegis to freeze him in place, before telling tomix that he knows what he has to do to end this, thanking him and aegis for being such good friends to her and the hero

• That Scene(tm) happens and everyone cries :(

• if there was ever a time that pandora wished that she had a human body again it was now, so she could hug the hero and comfort them as best she could as they both grieved (tomix and the hero told her it wasn’t her fault but there’s still some part of her that feels deeply guilty)

• now pandora has her memories back, on the hero’s request, she teaches them some chaosweaving in case their soulweaving training isn’t enough and they need to act fast in order to save people, as the technique doesn’t have to be used for evil, like how we see khvorost use it

• on that note, there’s a rather awkward scene when the hero meets khvorost and ruuma; he’s getting a little too carried away with bragging when the founder of chaosweaving herself appears

• book three continues with the occasional cameo from pandora

• with her memories and subsequently her fighting skills returned (think her attacks in the inn at the edge of time, with that hella cool scythe), she aids the hero in battle both through weaving and in physical form

• when the likes of caitiff’s cultists and the rose are trying to attack during a war but battalions keep getting lost or running across monsters that completely curb stomp them, a common denominator appears to be a certain spirit appearing in the material world before them

• speaking of caitiff, pandora vows to make life as hard for them as possible for hurting the hero so deeply, first by possessing serenity and then by corrupting the dragon; pandora will NOT lose another friend, time for the doom spirit to see precisely why she was considered the worst of her siblings

• when the hero, artix, nythera and the dragon are falling, pandora forms a cube around the hero to protect them when they land

• aside from khvorost, pandora probably doesn’t make that many cameos in book three’s main story (aside from maybe meeting kara) until probably the proclamation rifts

• as for the first weaver saga catching up with the main story, well, i guess we’ll have to wait and see, but something tells me she wouldn’t be too happy to see her father again...

• that being said, if secundus and pandora wound up having a fight, my money’s on pandora

[alyrae13]

Alright, time to explain my weeb ass! As promised, I’m gonna tell the reasons why I like each Gold Saint and why I see them as the way I do. Keep in mind, I’ll also may have to make this into two parts because of how long this would be in one single post, so please bare with me! Anyway, onward ho!!!

Libra Dohko

Starting off simple! Being a Libra myself, it’s easy to see that I would like this cool madafaka; He’s basically a better, more sensible version of Yoda. The reason I don’t feel very attracted to him is because I see him as the badass grandfather type, like the cool Chinese grandfather that could teach you how to kick ass while also being chill enough to unwind during tea time. 100% Dope Grandpa through and through.

Taurus Aldebaran

Now for the other one! Alde is a man who’s sweet as sugar cane yet as powerful as a raging bull. Despite his height, he’s a kind man when off the battle field and ready to fight for Athena when on said battle field. He’s not a character I’m attracted to because I see him as a strong yet sweet uncle figure who’s ready to stand alongside ya in both normal life and when fighting. He’s a tender giant of a man who supports those around him. Gentle Giant Uncle 100%.

Capricorn Shura

Now we go on to the tricky stuff. Shura, dear god do I love him. His character ideology is just so interesting due to the differences between the manga and anime. Wielder of the holy sword Excalibur, he could cut you to bits and think nothing of it. There’s also a possible angst hanging over him; He was the one sent to kill off Aiolos, knowing well how it would have affected little Aiolia. Imagine the amount of guilt he had for killing someone’s only family member? Even worse when you take the consideration of him realizing that he was willing to kill an innocent man without knowing about it, meaning he now knows he just tore a family apart and cause so much pain in vain. And please don’t get me even started on the Hades Saga and Soul of Gold. His character is just so great to me and I’m glad he was able to get on good terms with Aiolia in Soul of Gold. Plus, he’s a sexy Spanish man who’s super loyal, so why wouldn’t I love him?

Aquarius Camus

Camus, oh boy... Camus is someone who just gives me a whole array of emotions despite him not openly expressing them himself. On the surface, he is rather cold and distant due to not wanting to draw people into despair by showing exasperation, yet he’s still in control of his emotions rather than just suppressing them. His willing to fight for his ideals and for what he believes as correct (Soul of Gold anybody?), and although his way of teaching Hyoga is questionable at best, his only doing what he thinks will make Hyoga stronger as a saint. Despite being a man who appears uncaring and emotionless, he really isn’t. After all, we’re taking about the same man who one stated about hating people who mourn over the past yet also deeply cares for his pupil and about being true to his word to an old friend. Camus is a man who truly cares for those around him despite him appearing otherwise. He’s also a Frenchman, and who doesn’t love a beautiful French?

Gemini Saga and Kanon

Oh good grief this will be a long explanation. For the sake of respect and love for these two, I’ll be going over them individually because why not make this post into a full on essay?

Frist of all, Saga, poor Saga. Dear lord the amount of trauma this man had to go through is just heartbreaking. A man with an undying loyalty to Athena with an evil split personality... A more tragic version of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Not only was he forced to see his evil side kill Pope Shion and take over his identity, he had to see him try to kill baby Athena and send another saint to kill Aiolos; And he had to endure that fact for thirteen years. By the time he was finally free of his evil half, he was practically begging his beloved goddess to forgive him for all the hurt he caused. A powerful yet tragic man indeed. Then there is his relationship with Kanon (of who we’ll talk about in a moment), because it’s also a little sad. Kanon was definitely, a bit of a traitorous prick in the beginning and it was his imprisonment that led to Saga’s split personality in the first place. Yet you could still say that they at least cared for each other despite all the bullshit they must’ve gone through whilst growing up, because Saga was definitely happy in the Hades arc when he found his brother fighting for Athena.

Now for Kanon, fucking Kanon who despite starting out as an infidel of a man, then became a great character in the same vain as his brother Saga. Dude wanted to overthrow the Pope and kill baby Athena but ended up getting his butt locked in Cape Sounion. Now we know what happens there; Finds trident, get’s Poseidon half awakened, poses as the Sea Dragon and yada yada. It’s only when fighting Ikki does he end up changing because it’s then when Ikki told him the only reason he’s even alive is because of Athena’s Cosmo. So, plans in scrambles and now possibly gripped with an overwhelming sense of guilt, he goes over to Athena and without skipping a beat, becomes a shield against Poseidon‘s trident and begs Athena to forgive him before falling unconscious. And of course, we know about everything in Hades arc.

In the end, both men are equally cherished characters of mine and I won’t have it any other way. Also their handsome Greek men who need hugs and kisses and need to be told that they are loved and appreciated, so...

Cancer Deathmask

Oh Deathmask, you beautiful bastard you... Now Deathmask is more of an asshole than Kanon for reasons we all know at this point but I’m guessing his behavior could be explain simply due to the fact he is literally surrounded by death everyday. Like seriously, is it really a surprise that he’s like this when he’s constantly exposed to seeing the souls of the living fall right into practically hell? Nobody would be the same if they had to endure that, especially since most likely he started training to become a saint at a very early age. Now, this is when Soul of Gold comes into play, because god damn it how they wrote his character is just something. Firstly, he’s shown to be an gambling addict and an alcoholic, clearly unhealthy coping mechanisms for not being able to use his cloth and you know, being exposed to death at an early age and onwards for most of his life. Then we have Helena; Now, I’m not gonna lie, the whole ‘Changed better because of love’ trope is very much old at this point but it’s kinda ok because it shows us ‘Hey, even he has the opportunity to change and become a good man’. Deathmask, despite all the things he’s done against mankind, still has the potential to become an honorable Gold Saint and a decent human being; Plus his a sexy Italian who can rock the goatee look, so yay for the crab.

Pisces Aphrodite

Ah yes, the beloved fish boi. Honestly, I love his character simply because he breaks so many boundaries that it would be hard for me not to like him. He plays into the whole ‘appearances can be deceiving’ stick so well; He looks feminine yet his personally is quite the opposite (to some extent). His personality is something that’s interesting to me as well; Despite being so god damn beautiful, he doesn’t act narcissistic at all and doesn’t even care about having his appearance messed up in battle. HIs belief that power and strength are the most beautiful things in the world speaks fucking volumes to me and explains why he was willing to follow the False Pope’s orders. His character in Soul of Gold was just great as well! Like, to see his abilities and power being fully used to it’s full potential was simply badass and I doubt others won’t disagree with me on that one; He was definitely key in the story despite showing little of him. That’s way I love him so much; He’s a gorgeous Swede who can kick your ass and think little of it. He’s the type of man who will look damn good beating you up while shrugging off any damage to his figure like a frickin’ boss... He’s just that dope.

OK, that’s the first part of this really long post; Honestly this took me nearly an entire day to write, like, really. I had to take a break and ended up taking a nap before finishing this, it was that long. Hope many of you agree with my reasons for loving these characters so far and if not, that’s ok! Opinions are fine as long as no one gets hurt, so it’s fine if you don’t like them like I do! Anyway, I’m just gonna rest now because my fingers are killing me. Have a great day guys!

[queer-as-used-by-tolkien]

Storyline Study: Bangar and Almorra

This is a rewritten form of the juicy parts of this post that I foolishly left under a readmore. (This isn't all of it; there are some buried insights that didn't fit so well into the structure of this version.)

Inspired by @allergy-sufferer-emo-wandererr's Bangar-centric PMV of the song Rains of Castamere.

"And who are you," the proud lord said, "that I must bow so low?"

"Only a cat of a different coat. That's all the truth I know. In a coat of gold, or a coat of red, a lion still has claws. And mine are long and sharp, my lord, as long and sharp as yours."

And so he spoke... and so he spoke, that lord of Castamere. But now the rains weep o'er his halls, with no one there to hear. Yes, now the rains weep o'er his halls. And not a soul to hear.

This song is about a lord and an underling; it draws lines between ranks and classes. A very Bangar song, but there's a hint of Almorra in it, too - the gladium-turned-hero, estranged from her people first by custom, then by choice.

One of my favorite aspects of this story is how strikingly little we, the Commander, have to do with it. This story started before many of our Commanders were even born, such as how Almorra and Bangar met, what their relationship was like, whether Almorra's unnamed daughter is also Bangar's, and when they broke up; several parts of it occurred right in front of us without our realizing - your first Vigil mission addresses Ajax, and even a few key parts of it during Bound by Blood were only accidentally overheard by the Commander. And, of course, there is the fact that we would never even know anything if it weren't for our eavesdropping through Ryland's memories. We are simply not relevant. It's not our story.

I think this is appropriate. There are stories in Tyria we will never know in their entirety; this makes the world feel more real, that we have these untold stories reaching into the murky past, connecting us with history.

Back to the song; a lot of my insights are drawn from wondering if the song would fit them, and a few stumbles I made along the way. It drew out the similarities and differences in a very striking way.

First, I wondered if the song could be mostly about Almorra and less about Bangar, since the pmv felt... not exactly connected right. (No offense.)

In this incarnation, it would be about Almorra, a new gladium, being rejected by her culture (presumably, specifically Bangar) and going off to found the Vigil. Except that the song ends in loneliness; and despite Almorra's death and even Jhavi's line that no warrior should have to die alone, it just didn't feel like it fit properly.

Contrasted to the song, this made me realize that the stories of Almorra and Bangar are similar, but in a way that they contrasted each other as a sort of emphasis.

Almorra's story began with loneliness when she lost her warband, but then she grew - she founded the Vigil, she was an open-minded leader who was, ultimately, willing to join the Pact, and later be part of the extended Pact that killed Kralkatorrik. That's where her story was supposed to end; at the pinnacle of her victory - not just that she'd defeated Kralkatorrik, but also that she'd found new allies after the loss of her warband. And she proved that she wasn't just in it for revenge, she wasn't just a bitter fighter who was simply desperate to avenge her companions - she was a true warrior. She kept fighting. She was praised as a hero upon her return to Ascalon, but she brushed off the fakes who dumped her when she was alone (a brilliant lesson in itself about true friendship), and went to continue her life's work - and at the time? At that specific moment, she was going to bring life and hope to her soldiers - her people - telling them of Kralkatorrik's defeat. Almorra Soulkeeper is an awe-inspiring influence and role model, and it's a disgusting shame that Bangar did what he did. But that, I think, was a masterfully contrived symbol that Anet used to contrast their stories.

Bangar was an Imperator. He was a powerful fighter, a masterful influencer (first time I laid eyes on him I pegged him as a politician, and he did not disappoint), and the mentor of the best rising star of the Blood Legion. But his story is one of losing - he lost Rytlock who knows when, he lost Almorra at some point, he lost Ajax in the PS, and then we have the start of IBS when he took all who would, and went into the Shiverpeaks to hunt a dragon. There, he murdered Almorra, supposedly his fire and blood, which may have been what started Ryland's fall. And then, despite his claims of doing everything for the charr, he started a civil war that nearly wiped out the charr, turned a good chunk of them into Icebrood, and all for nothing - Jormag passed over him. To add insult to injury, he lost his last ally - Ryland. Bangar's story ends in a cage, locked in silence, with half of his interactions with other people being solely so that Aurene or the Commander (and even Crecia) could request an audience with Jormag, who has even taken his voice from him.

These stories are polar opposites. To illustrate Bangar's fall, he murders Almorra, the opposing story of success. Almorra achieved what she wanted with Kralkatorrik; Bangar failed utterly with Jormag. Almorra and Bangar's stories spiral together (I'm kind of picturing the spiral helix at the end of HoT), but they are separate and vastly different and both go in different directions. Despite their endings being similar - ending in loneliness - Bangar's story derives in part from his inability to keep Almorra with him after she becomes independent of him. IBS is the climax, the disaster, the desperation and failed hope, the resounding end to Bangar's story. But for Almorra, it was just an annoying epilogue. She'd already lived her story - without him - and emerged victorious.

These two stories are startling in the way they contrast and orbit each other. The Icebrood Saga starts when both are at the height of their power - Almorra has the Vigil and even all of the Pact behind her, she has the Commander, she even has the support of the charr for having killed Kralkatorrik. Bangar, a highly-respected Imperator, is a great uniter - he has brought the four Legions together and managed to have them cooperate peacefully in a celebration. Their positions are nearly equal. The tension arises when Almorra and Bangar still don't see eye-to-eye. There is a disconnect between their core values.

The song is about a lord and a subordinate (I imagine a lowly peasant). This is Bangar, highly respected and powerful, and Almorra, the exiled gladium. The song illustrates the lord's pride versus the peasant's declaration that "my claws are as long and sharp as yours" - or Bangar's pride versus Almorra's individuality, Bangar's army versus Almorra's influence. The song is remarkably simple and short; but the two actors in this story have weaved a dance of opposition and contrast - yin-yang, and light-and-dark.

It is a masterfully plotted echo, a pre-type, a sort of thematic foreshadowing of the opposing but twinned forces of Jormag and Primordus.

[niishiki]

There is no place like home

For the 1k celebration of @youbloodymadgenius

Characters: Ivar the Boneless, Ubbe, Hvitserk, Bjorn Ironside, Sigurd Snake in the Eye

Relationship: GEN

Warnings: Light Angst, Mild Hurt/Comfort

Ubbe was worried as he watched the thick snowflakes fall from the darkening sky that stretched above these strange lands. England was still as unfamiliar to him as it had been when the Great Heathen Army had first landed on the shores of Northumbria months ago. King Aelle’s death, their campaign against King Ecbert and his ilk, all that seemed so far away now. Ubbe had wanted to settle and so now he stood on the land that they had pried from the hands of their enemy and was overlooking the settlement that they had built on the ashes of the one their father and Lagertha had built a lifetime ago. This time, Ubbe Ragnarsson knew, it would be a success for the young prince Alfred was already a better and smarter leader than his father had ever been and his brother Aethelred was smart enough to heed his brother’s advice. 

Bjorn had left them shortly after their victory over Ecbert but he had returned this morning to see what had become of his brothers and their plans in this strange land - and, of course, to celebrate Yule with them. Their first Yule in this new land where they were not only the sons of Ragnar Lothbrok but able to make names for themselves, where they would create their own sagas. 

“Still no news of Ivar?” Bjorn’s voice would have startled him had he not already heard him approach, his heavy steps crunching on the snow. Ubbe sighed and his breath fogged in front of his face. It was bitterly cold out here and most people were in their houses already to escape into the warmth of their new homes. Regardless of the cold and the harsh winds, every night Ubbe would find himself standing on that hill that was overlooking his settlement - watching, waiting.

“No,” He replied quietly almost as if he hoped the wind would rip his words away. “Nothing. Hvitserk thinks he is dead.”

“What do  you think?”

“I think,” - He turned the words over and over in his head, tasting them on his tongue, and found them to be lacking. Still, he said them regardless -“I think that the chances of a cripple surviving out in the wilderness in a strange, and unfamiliar country where he has no friends or alleys and is all by his lonesome, are slim to nonexistent. I do not want it to be true. However, I would be a fool to claim that Ivar is anything but dead. I think, as much as I hate it, that Ivar is dead. He might have starved out there. He might have frozen to death. He might have been attacked by an animal. He might have hurt himself and could not find help. Or he might have been attacked by Saxons. Whatever happened to him, he has probably not survived his first months out there.”

Bjorn was silent for a while before he put his arm around Ubbe’s shoulders. There had been a time when Ubbe had looked up to his brother with nothing but admiration and thought that Bjorn always knew what the right thing to do was. He knew better now. Bjorn had left them behind without consideration for what would happen when he would leave and still Ubbe found it difficult to be mad at him. Maybe he would have done the same thing. They were all adults, after all. They were no longer Bjorn’s kid brothers, no longer that hoard of puppies that he needed to protect. 

“It has been his choice to leave,” Bjorn said after a while. “He has decided to leave because he could not deal with what he has done. It is not your fault, Ubbe. I know that it pains you greatly that Ivar is dead but you have no blame in that. You would not have been able to stop Ivar.”

“I know,” Ubbe muttered and wished that the words would reach his heart. Maybe then he would not find the need in him to come out here every night to look for his lost lamb. He had the feeling, however, that this was what his life would look like from now on. As long as he would not know what happened to his baby brother, he would find himself searching and restless. “I know … No one was ever able to stop Ivar the boneless.”

Bjorn patted him on the back at that. “How is Sigurd?” He then asked a little more light-hearted and forced his younger brother to turn his back to the settlement. Together the brothers walked down the hill. The longhouse was calling for them with the promise of warmth and good food. 

“He is getting better each day,” Ubbe replied with a smile. “But his recovery is slow. Much slower than he would like, of course. The last infection he caught almost brought him to his knees but I think the worst is behind him now.”

“None of us can claim to have much patience. It is not in our blood for our father was not very patient either.”

They reached the foot of the hill within minutes and walked through the settlement, greeting whatever soul was still out there with them, and finally walked into the longhouse. Tomorrow the big Yule celebration would take place but tonight it was only them, the remaining sons of Ragnar enjoying a night in peace all to themselves. Yet, as they later sat around the fire on pillows or propped against stools with bowls of delicious smelling stew in their hands and mead in their cups, none of them spoke, none of them could shake the feeling that something was not right. Sigurd ate like a bird since his injury. He sat propped against a column on a few pillows, a fur draped over his shoulders and his lap, his face pale and his eyes tired. The fever and the infection had almost taken his life even as Ivar’s ax had failed to do so.

Until now, even though it had been months, Sigurd had not yet talked about the incident or his little brother. He could not fool Ubbe, though. No, Ubbe knew that Sigurd thought as much about Ivar as he and Hvitserk did. He would catch him sometimes looking over his shoulder, expecting to see Ivar to throw some snarky comment at him for something he had said or to goad his little brother into a fight only to be disappointed when there was only thin air staring back at him. Ivar’s absence from their life was as loud as Ivar himself. Sigurd and Ivar’s relationship had always been rocky but Sigurd loved his little brother all the same - even though it had taken an ax to his chest and for his little brother to vanish for Sigurd to realize that. And now they all knew that it might be too late. 

“It is our first Yule away from Kattegat,” Hvitserk said after a while, his usually so open expression guarded and unreadable even for Ubbe. Hvitserk was not really the sentimental type of guy and yet he seemed overcome with great nostalgia. “Our first Yule without Mother and Father.”

“Our first Yule without Ivar,” Sigurd added quietly, his eyes lowered on the bowl in his hand. “It is strange … not having him here, is it not?”

“It is,” Bjorn agreed. “He would be starting fights with us right now over the food or the quality of the mead or he would ridicule our plans. I can not deny that I miss that. He kept us on our toes because he would pick apart every plan we made and thus, in turn, made them better.”

“To Ivar,” Ubbe said and raised his cup. “Wherever he is.”

“To Ivar!” His three remaining brothers chimed in. They emptied their cups and refilled them and finally, they began to eat. Yet, Ubbe already knew that tomorrow, he would be up on that hill again, looking for his lost brother and his brothers knew that too. They all had found their own way to cope with the loss of their youngest. Bjorn had committed his life to exploring the world, Hvitserk was keeping an eye on the children of their settlement even though Ubbe could tell that his war-hungry brother was getting restless, and Sigurd played his Oud for the people that wanted to listen to it, maybe hoping that one day he might just hear the voice of his little brother in the crowd telling him to shove it up his ass.

The settlement was silent and still and the moon stood high above the valley as Ubbe walked over to the open doors of the longhouse once again. Outside, the flurry had started to become worse. A snowstorm was sure to hit soon. He and his brothers had sat for hours around the cozy fire, eating and drinking and exchanging stories but things were different than they should be. It was time to lock the doors to the longhouse, to keep the snow and the cold outside so that he and his brothers might retreat to their beds. Tomorrow was a new day and the people of their settlement wanted to celebrate Yule. None of them shared the pain the brothers were feeling that night. 

Just as Ubbe shoved the first of the doors closed, he noticed a figure approaching through the snow. At first, he had not seen them but the closer they came, the clearer their dark silhouette stood against the white snow. The way the figure moved was strange, although it took Ubbe a second to notice that.

“What's wrong?” Hvitserk asked as he approached his older brother but Ubbe only pointed outside towards the figure that was clearly coming towards them. They were dressed in a cowl that was gently swaying in the wind, as far as he could tell and for a moment, Ubbe felt painfully reminded of the day Odin had come to him and his brothers to inform them of Ragnar’s death. The closer the figure came, however, the clearer Ubbe could see that they were limping quite badly, one leg dragging behind them as they were putting all their weight onto a thick knob. His heart stopped for just a single beat.

“Ivar” The word escaped him without thinking, so silently it was ripped from his lips by the harsh wind. He stepped outside without waiting for Hvitserk, not yet sure if the figure outside was nothing more than a drunk hallucination of sorts or actually there. Hvitserk did not stop him, though, as he walked into the snow and the flurry. As only three steps separated him from the figure, they stopped and brushed the hood off their head. He was met with bright blue eyes and a tuft of dark hair, a pale face, and a lopsided, though uncertain smile. Before one of his other brothers could say anything or call for his attention and not yet sure if what he saw was really there, Ubbe bridged the remaining distance and closed his arms around the figure of his brother.

Silence lay like a blanket over the five sons of Ragnar as they sat around the fire in the longhouse, reunited at last after seven long months. The sons of Ragnar were not known to be quiet characters but right now none of them knew the right words to say. As he looked at his youngest brother now, his lost little lamb, he saw once again how he had thrown his ax in a fit of rage at their brother Sigurd, saw Sigurd fall to the ground, saw Ivar’s face frozen in panic as he had realized what he had done. The same moment that had sundered their family for seven months was replaying over and over and over in his head without mercy.

“Where have you been?” Hvitserk asked after a while as he refilled his brother’s empty cup. Ivar’s black armor was in tatters by now after the months he had spent in the wilderness, his hair was longer and unkempt. Still no beard though, a proof of how young his brother truly was. 

“Everywhere … nowhere…” Ivar replied calmly and took a sip from the mead his older brother had just refilled so graciously. “I drifted through the land without knowing where to go, really.”

“How are you still alive?”

“Ah,” Ivar murmured, a small chuckle escaping him as Bjorn could no longer hold back the question that all of them really wanted to know the answer to for it seemed a miracle that Ivar was sitting with them now, alive and well. It was so miraculous, that Ubbe could barely keep his hands to himself and stop himself from touching Ivar just to make sure he was really there. “Father warned me that everyone would always underestimate me but I would not have thought my own kin would make that mistake too. I am much more capable than you think I am. I hunted when I was hungry. Sometimes I survived on plants and mushrooms and whatever I could steal. I avoided villages and towns, of course. A cripple like me … there is no way of knowing what they might have done to me. Most of the time I spent in the woods, exploring the land, thinking.”

“Thinking?” Bjorn asked, his voice raised several octaves as if the word itself was foreign to him. It spoke to Ivar’s exhaustion that he was not taking a jab on his brother for that. “About what?”

“The Gods … this land … the opportunities ahead, myself, and my actions, my family.” Ubbe grabbed the back of his brother’s neck just like he used to do without thinking too much about it. Ivar’s skin was cold to the touch and he needed rest and something warm to eat. “I won't lie … sometimes it was a pretty close call. I broke my leg a few months ago. I thought … I was sure that I had to cut it all off or die of infection. I was delirious from fever and sickness. I would have gone through with it too but I came across a priest who took me in and helped me.”

“Why did you leave?” Ubbe asked at last but this time he did not get an answer right away. Ivar bit down on his bottom lip instead and looked into his cup as if he would find the answer he was looking for on the bottom of it. So far he had avoided looking at Sigurd for the entire time they were sitting here. 

“I am glad you are alive, Sigurd.” Ivar surprised them all as he finally looked at his brother. “I didn't know if you would make it.”

“Is that why you left?” Bjorn asked with raised brows. “To escape the punishment for kin-slaying?”

“No!” The answer came out more forcefully than before. His voice had been soft and even until now. “I would have gladly taken the punishment! I am not a coward, Bjorn Ironside. I left because … I could not stand the thought of what I have done. I…” Again, he bit his bottom lip before looking back at Sigurd. “I never wanted to hurt you. I acted out of anger and … I am truly sorry, Sigurd. I did not have control over myself-”

“If that is-”

“I allowed for too long that my anger controlled me,” Ivar spat, cutting Bjorn off once more. “Because for all my life it served me well. All my life I never knew anything but anger but I never meant to hurt my own flesh and blood. I regretted it the moment the ax left my hand and if I could take it back I would - but that is not in my power. I realized that, if I would stay and if Sigurd would die, that you, my brothers, would have to render a judgment over me. The punishment for kin-slaying is death. Although I would have readily accepted it … I did not want any of my brothers to have to do it. I thought one dead brother was more than enough pain to be put upon my family. So, I decided to leave and free you from the burden. I would not have thought to survive for as long as I did. I thought that I should put my fate in the hands of the gods. I thought, if Sigurd would die, certainly the Gods would see to it that I would die too out there. But they did not. I survived and survived and survived until I heard about this settlement and my brothers playing farmers. For a long time, I did not know if I wanted to return.”

“And why did you?” Ubbe asked, at last, his voice soft as he squeezed Ivar’s neck carefully.

A small laugh escaped Ivar. “I fell into a frozen lake,” He huffed. “A fortnight ago. I was certain the ice would carry me but it did not. You know I cannot swim and I … I can admit that I am scared of the water. So, when I fell through the ice I was sure that this time there would be no way out, this time I would die. And yet, I did not. Somehow I managed to find my way back to the surface and I survived. As I lay there, cold and alone, above me only the stars, I decided that I had tempted the Gods enough and that, if even then they did not want my death, that they wanted me to return home - to my brothers, to make amends for what I did. The only thing I can hope for now is that my brothers will actually allow me back into their fold.”

Ubbe wanted to pull him into a hug and he could tell that Hvitserk thought the same thing but they both held back.

“That is not on us to decide,” Bjorn, always the leader, said. “You almost killed Sigurd. It is his decision to make if he wants to forgive you or if he wants you gone.”

Sigurd did not appear to be rushed to say something as he stared into the flames between himself and his little brother. Sigurd and Ivar’s relationship had always been fragile at the best of times but for months Sigurd had battled with the injury his brother had inflicted upon him and the resulting consequences. However, sometimes when Ubbe would talk to him he felt like being confined to his bed and being reliant on the help of his brothers for such a long time, had taught Sigurd a thing or two about Ivar’s plight. 

“If I would send him back out into the cold, Ubbe would never forgive me,” Sigurd then said, his eyes finally meeting Ivar’s. “I can see that he is lactating already now that his baby is back at his side, ready to suck on his teats.” Hvitserk barked out a laugh at that and Ubbe felt the heat rise in his cheek. Instead of pushing Ivar away from him, he pulled him closer and kissed the side of his head.

“Besides,” Sigurd then continued, the smirk still remaining on his face. “I am still alive and we can thank the Gods and Helga’s magnificent healing hands for that - but we can also thank the Gods that Ivar too is still alive. This Yule celebration marks the end of the year. We lost our father this year. We lost our mother this year. However, we were also victorious over the Saxons and took our revenge for the death of our father. We conquered land and we built something new. We opened the path for more of our people to follow us into this new land so that our people might thrive. I do not wish to end this year by casting my little brother out into the wilderness for him to die after all. I can admit that I have not been the best brother to you, Ivar.”

That took all of them by surprise, especially Ivar, who quickly looked away again. 

“I can admit that I have been jealous because Mother clung to you and cast me to the wayside. When Siggy died” - Bjorn stiffened beside them but he did not say anything - “I realized that it might as well have been me and she would not have noticed. But that was not your fault, Ivar. I should have seen that earlier and tried to be a better brother. You may have thrown an ax at me out of anger but I too have lashed out in anger at you and I hurt you just as deeply as your ax hurt me. As far as I am concerned, I would like to bury the hatchet so that we might just begin the new year as a united front once again.”

Ivar had never been particularly good at hiding his emotions and he was not even trying to now as he sat beside Ubbe, a tear rolling down his face before he clenched his jaw, squeezed his lips into a tight line, and gave a sharp nod. 

“Now, kiss and make up!”

With as much accuracy as he had applied throwing his ax so many months ago, Ivar now threw his cup, hitting Hvitserk right on the forehead. His brother fell back playfully against the ground, groaning in mock-injury and Ubbe watched, amazed how Ivar quickly crawled over to finish him. He watched them scuffle on the ground like children, before Hvitserk regained the upper hand and pressed a very wet, very audible smooch to his brother’s mouth before falling onto him and remaining there, pinning Ivar beneath him.

“I should not have returned,” Ivar groaned and, just like that, the spell that had hung over their heads, seemed broken.

“He is your problem now,” Sigurd shot back with a grin as he slowly managed to get off the floor to retreat to bed. It would be the first night in seven months that all of them would sleep in the same room again and it would be the first time in seven months that Ubbe too would finally find a peaceful slumber.

[invisibleinorange]

A Different Ending  1/?

Chapters: 1/? Fandom: Bridgerton Rating: M Warnings:  Only be forewarned that this is an AU from the Adrift saga but Colin actually died in this one, so if he’s mentioned he’s actually gone. Relationships: Benedict Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington, Colin Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington (past feelings),  Eloise Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington(besties),  Bridgerton Family Dynamics,  Daphne Bridgerton/Simon Hastings Characters:  Penelope Featherington, Eloise Bridgerton, Phillip Crane, Benedict Bridgerton, Daphne Bridgerton, Additional Tags:  Bridgerton, Penadict (do we have a ship name yet?)

Summary:  There were some requests for an alternate/Parallel word to "Bridgerton's Adrift" where Benedict and Penelope actually did get married. So this is the result of that peer pressure. Still not sure whether this will be a bunch of connected one shots or a full-blown fic project but here we go.

Anthony and Violet had gone above and beyond to help make sure that the church was immaculate. It was unseemly to be extravagant on moments of great spiritual weight but after everything they’d been through in recent months he felt they deserved a moment of happiness.  Despite anxiety he might have had about the gravity of the situation, he was happy.

It was hard to believe that his word could turn upside down in such a short amount of time. He’d gone from seeking this engagement as a means to honor his late brother to seeing the potential in the match.  He’d grown to respect and enjoy Penelope’s company more than he could say that he enjoyed most.

As he gazed around the church, it meant a lot to have his family there to support this choice.  It was nice to see everyone smiling, finding something to look forward to.  Time was marching forward and they were all moving on.  They were figuring out how to live in a world without Colin Bridgerton.  Perhaps, he had been a catalyst to this marriage but he was no longer the soul reason for it.

It felt surreal in a way.  Benedict had never quite been able to quite put a face to his future. It had always been a blur but it all seemed so clear now.  It was almost shocking how Penelope Featherington who had always disappeared into the background was front and center. She had captured his attention and now he was eager to help her reach her potential; A potential that so many other had failed to see.

They could reach their potential together.

As nervous as he was, he was excited to see her. He was eager to see what was going to be next because the last few months had been utterly unpredictable and he was quite happy with where he was in this given moment.

His pulse quickened at the sight of Anthony at the entrance, then there was envelope beside her brother. Anthony took her in his arm and led the way and he knew he was absolutely shook. His appreciation and affection toward the girl had been generally mentally based but in that moment, he appreciated the physical just as much.

His smile widened despite his nerves, meeting her eye as she crossed the distance of the church to him and when she was near he took her hands in his try to and still the shake.  He quietly leaned near playing it like he was brushing back a red curl but it was just an excuse to whisper in her ear.

“It’ll be okay,” he told her.

And it was.  It was going to be perfectly okay.

She squeezed his larger hands, focusing on him instead of the sea of eyes watching and undoubtedly waiting for him to come to his senses and run away.  That was the outcome Penelope saw in her nightmares; the whole Bridgerton family turning away from her. Sometimes she even saw Colin there as a ghost whispering in Benedict’s ear, laughing at the thought that she was worthy.

Benedict wasn’t running away though and as the Vicar read from the Common Book of Prayers she was grateful for it.   Admittedly, she did grow anxious as the Vicar reached the part where he had to ensure no one had a reason why the wedding should be stopped.

She chanced a glance back toward Eloise who gave her a reassuring nod.

When no objected, the Vicar continued and her focus moved back to her groom.  As the questioning moved from the audience to them, it was pretty clear that this was going to be one of the last moment’s they had in which they could turn back.  There were no secrets of the heart to be shared though.  There was nothing that hadn’t been shared or said. Benedict knew about Lady Whistledown. He knew how she’d felt about his brother. Those things hadn’t made him turn away from her though. They’d only brought them closer together.

“Benedict Bridgerton, wilt thou have this Woman to thy wedded Wife, to live together after God’s ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou love her, comfort her, honour, and keep her in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all other, keep thee only unto her, so long as ye both shall live?” the vicar asked as he moved from the gloom and doom, threats of burning in Hell to vows.

There was a pause and in that pause, Penelope was certain she forgot to breath.

“I will,” he said after a moment and she remembered again.

“Penelope Featherington, wilt thou have this Man to thy wedded Husband, to live together after God’s ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou obey him, and serve him, love, honour, and keep him in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all other, keep thee only unto him, so long as ye both shall live?”  the Vicar asked of her.

Penelope had thought long and hard about this and while she’d struggled to imagine saying these words to Benedict before, they were there now and she meant them.  She wasn’t one to enter into an obligation lightly.

“I will,” she said back.

There was then passing of hands.  Even though she’d been holding Benedict’s hand through the majority of it, she was required to let go long enough to let Anthony pass her to him and then there were more vows.  There were Words that she had to repeat and those that he had to repeat in order to make additional promises to each other. It all went off without a hitch and then Benedict was required to kneel and he did, presenting a new ring to her symbolic of their marriage.

The ceremony was becoming a bit tediously long at this point but they were still required to pray before declaring them wed and even then he had to give them a blessing.  By the time, they ceremony was complete and they were allowed to move to sign the Parrish register to masses were restless and moving around, ready to get to the events that would follow.

“I hope you’re famished and ready to eat after that,” Benedict said with a hint of a smile while he watched his new bride sign. “Daph’s created quite a spread at Hastings House.”

A late breakfast feast was the tradition but Penelope wasn’t sure she could eat a single bite.

“Once my stomach returns to itself I might be able to eat something,” she confessed.“I know what you mean,” he said with a laugh, extending an arm to her so that he might properly escort her toward an awaiting carriage and to the fete.  “You were a beautiful bride though and we never have to do that again. We can literally hide away from the vicar and his promises of Hell fire for the rest of our days. I'll protect you just like I promised.”

She accepted his open arm.  “The scary thing is that was apparently the easy part,”  she couldn’t help but tell him, keeping her voice low between them as they moved past people to try and get where they needed to go. They could socialize more there.  “The rest of it is supposed to be much harder.”

“At risk of offending my new wife, I assure you that you have nothing to be afraid about."

[izartn]

On the The Host romance:

A lil note: @into-september as you’re reading Twilight, and your last post made me realise this, I thought it better to write my own post and tag you! Hope you don’t mind.

The Host is the first novel of an “adult” science fiction trilogy by Stephanie Meyer which never was finished. Published in 2008, the same year as Breaking Dawn, I guess she preferred gaining the benefits of her vampire saga to keep on writing. 

For shame, because for me, The Host is much better at establishing worldbuilding, a concept and its protagonists + a romance (not that there isn’t anything cuestionable in it, but to my taste it’s better done than in Twilight). Here is the first paragraph of The Host wikipedia’s section on plot: 

A species of parasitic aliens called "Souls" have invaded Earth, deeming the humans too violent to deserve the planet. When a Soul is implanted into a host body, the consciousness of the original owner is erased, leaving their memories and knowledge. 

Wanderer, a Soul, is placed into the body of Melanie Stryder. However, Melanie's consciousness is still alive and begins to communicate with Wanderer mentally. Wanderer's assigned "Seeker" suggests that she could be placed into Melanie to retrieve the memories before disposing of the defective body, but Wanderer makes several attempts to deny her Seeker's wishes. As Wanderer starts to uncover some of Melanie's memories of her younger brother Jamie Stryder and her boyfriend Jared Howe, Melanie gets her to follow a series of landmarks throughout the Arizona desert to find her Uncle Jeb, hoping that Jared and Jamie are with him. By doing so, she would be denying the Seeker Melanie's memories and the humans they would lead her to.

Just. Read that and have the face to tell me it doesn’t sound more interesting than Twilight I dare you. Of course the books are different genres, although the focus is in the... more sentimental part in both. It’s just that The Host story is more unusual and the worldbuilding dreamy and subtly horrific. 

Well I said I was gonna talk about the romance right? Spoilers incoming!

 A bit of more context is necessary; in The Host, Melanie, the human Wanda (nickname of Wanderer) is possessing, is in love with the boyfriend mentioned in the sinopsis, Jared. Wanda being in the body of Melanie, feels things for him. We can divine for context this is sexual attraction plus having access to some of Melanie’s memories and noticing Jared is pretty ok as humans not possessed are left on Earth. 

Melanie reaction to this oscillates between “don’t you dare touch my boyfriend alien” and “well of course you fell for him, he’s pretty awesome” to “if I can’t it’s ok if you want to” when she’s feeling herself disappear at one point. Which is bullshit bc her conscience comes back when Wanda goes to tell Jared to kiss her bc she’s feeling Melanie disappear and when he gets near Wanda, Melanie usually mounts a whole circus in her head. It works. 

Well that’s one part of the romance. The other is Ian, a human in the settlement who is pretty level-headed and who starts talking to Wanda, as her guard first and then as her friend. No previous contact with Melanie, so he mets Wanda in Melanie’s body and isn’t excessively hostile or sad. Bc you know, an alien is in the body of you “niece, girlfriend, sister, etc” isn’t really conductive to good first impressions although that alien has come bearing the news that said person is still alive somewhere in their brain. 

(Also the whole human group is so hilariously based on those paranoid about the government/end-of-days usa people... And it works! LMAO) (The social dynamics are interesting in this book ok? basic but ingenious)

So Wanda falls slowly without noticing for Ian; Ian falls first and confesses and everything. I think their first kiss was a bit sketchy? But generally they good. 

The interesting thing is this: Melanie and so her body, is in love and attracted to Jared. Wanda, inhabiting Melanie’s body, starts realising that although Jared is pretty ok and all that, he’s really Melanie’s love; she doesn’t exactly like his more violent tendencies. 

(Really he’s more apocalypse survivor hardcore, but he really was a dick to her at the start, bc alien possessing girlfriend and all. Also gave her mixed signals, etc. Very american male which, eh. Melanie is also very apocalypse survivor hardcore; the two mesh well bc of that lmao) 

Well, as Stephanie Meyer is SM, and she has some weird ideas about romance the thing is, Wanda doesn’t feel sexually attracted to Ian. Bc all the hormones in her body are signaling only Jared. But she really is romantically attracted to Ian, and loves him. When they kiss, she likes it, but it’s not super passionate nor does it brings the same high that the few occasions Jared kissed her. To Ian’s credit he doesn’t really get it at the start, but then is immediately acepting of Wanda’s boundaries. I think he pushes a bit? But this SM so. Sigh. (I like to think in the hands of another author he wouldn’t do the sterotypical male thing but yah)

What I mean is that Stephanie Meyer, without intention, created an ace romance. Sure, it bc really weird biological alien science, but if you take it to mean Melanie is demi and only feels attracted to Jared, that makes her body reactions logical when Wanda also falls in love. She isn’t occupying the body wholly; there’s the host original presence; so she falls romantically but not physically. If I’m saying great idiotices please correct me under; I don’t have any background on sexology or biology. 

Sadly, Wanda is also super worried of not being able of correctly loving Ian, so. Negation of ace identity in one, two..., warning to folks sensible to it. 

And well, she ruins it when at the end when Wanda is put outside Melanie´s body into one who doesn’t have a human conscience. She explained the others how to take “souls” out of humans without killing any part, and how to take the “souls” to the space ships where they’ll be transported to other worlds. But sometimes the humans have passed so much time suppressed, or have been taken so young, that there isn’t a conscience-anyone to recover. 

The Host is very weird, bc this is a race of genocidal colonist aliens who are weird beautiful little ribbons of silver in their original form, who after abandoning their original world by possessing another race who invaded them realised they could live whatever lives they wanted possessing people without dying and just. Went for it. They are a supposedly all peace loving gents, who cured all poverty and illness by their superior technology and like, very comunist-anarchist society. Who abhor violence, but don’t see eliminating other people identity as violence. 

They are weird and amazing; when they realise having and raising children as humans costs so much, they start acting as parents to those humans without going to have a soul implanted on their kid, bc they love them as they are. A mess of contradictions, and Wanda is so interesting bc of this. 

Sadly, SM acted again, and made Wanda one of the rare females able of auto-destroying to create more fragments of herself (aka other souls). The rest of souls don’t have any gender and chose bodies as whatever sex they like most. Guess Wanda being an alien was fine, but not having an explicit gender was too much, lol. To be fair, she says she prefers female bodies, but doesn’t really mind. Good on Wanda. 

There’s a secondary romance too; the search of Ian’s brother, Kyle (who almost kills Wanda once) for his abducted girlfriend, Jodie. Results the soul inside her body, Sunny has all of Jodie’s memories of Kyle and is like, already in love with him. She lets herself be abducted, and when they explain they’re gonna get her out and why, is like, cries and begs, but accepts it bc is Jodie who Kyle loves. She hasn’t ever heard her like Wanda did Melanie, though, so when like a week or two pass and Jodie’s conscience remains dead Kyle consents (bc the other relatives of Jodie are soulified) to bring back Sunny. Wow. What a clusterfuck. They don’t date but there’s this weird vibe where Kyle has stopped hating all souls after Wanda’s mess and his encounter with Sunny, and Sunny herself is like; yay! I can live with humans and Kyle and I’ll keep trying to awake Jodie. And the two of them are described as inseparable? 

It’s more intriguing than Twilight; I wished there were more fics interested in exploring cool canon divergences and all. I didn’t dive in the problematiqueTM aspects of the book but come on, this is SM and you have reading comprehension. I just wanted to talk about how interesting is the intersection of sexuality in romance in Wanda’s case >-< Still better than Twilight but I guess the aesthetic of vamps surpases The Host. Which. Valid ok? Each to their own. 

[ariainstars]

Star Wars, the Last 20 Years or Can We Please Try to Stop the Blame Train?

I would like to touch a subject that’s starting to grate on my nerves a little.

Anyone here knows that I disliked The Rise of Skywalker heartily. And I’m not the only person here or elsewhere who tore it to shreds. But I am reading (again) over and over why and how JJ Abrams, Chris Terrio, Kathleen Kennedy and Co. made this mess. Instead of searching for culprits, this time I would like to point out a few things.

I. Star Wars Prequels

Jake Lloyd, Ahmed Best and Hayden Christensen had to endure awful harassment in their time: the audience largely vented their frustration on them because when the prequels hit theatres, they did not get the Star Wars they had wanted. Politics are a dry subject, and young Anakin and the Jedi Council were all too human to be liked by fans who expect coolness in a hero more than everything else; which is probably why Darth Maul is a huge favorite although we hardly learn anything about him and he says almost nothing. Ditto Obi-Wan although he is clearly not suited to train Anakin and it’s him who maims him and leaves him to burn in the lava. (Until I saw the film, I had always assumed Palpatine had tortured Anakin to push him to the Dark Side.) 

The prequels’ messages in general were not liked: the Jedi were not perfectly wise and cool wizards, the Old Republic was stagnant, Anakin was a hot-headed, frustrated young man desperate to save his wife and unborn children. The films do not want to excuse what he did; however they portray him not as a monster but as a human being who was under an almost unendurable pressure for years and years until he finally snapped.

These messages may not be “cool”, but they were realistic and most of all, humane. Portraying the Jedi as well as Anakin as powerful, flawless heroes and the old Republic as a just, prosperous and balanced place would have meant undermining a central theme of the original trilogy: the former generation could not have been all that powerful and wise, else the collapse of their world and the failure of their convictions would not have happened in the first place. It is a sore point, but still twenty years later Obi-Wan and Yoda denied that Vader was human and expected Luke to commit patricide. 

All of this goes to show that the Jedi’s moral standard was flawed and their attitude not rooted in compassion and pacifism the way they claimed. In the end, what they cared about was winning, no matter the cost. In this, they were no better than the Sith.

~~~more under the cut~~~

II. Star Wars Sequels

J.J. Abrams, Kathleen Kennedy, Bob Iger and company were the ones who introduced the Star Wars sequel trilogy and with it its themes, characters, setting etc. to us in the first place: I think we should give them credit where it’s due. Rian Johnson made a very beautiful second chapter with The Last Jedi, but he did pick up where the others had left. 

Kelly Marie Tran made experiences similar to Jake Lloyds or Hayden Christensen’s when The Last Jedi was hit theatres. She was disliked for not being “Star-Wars-y” enough, chubby and lively instead of wiry and spitfire, and also taking a lot of screen time while many fans were impatiently waiting for some grand scenes from Luke and / or Leia. 

That Episode VIII, the central and most important one, was called “The Last Jedi” cannot be overstated. Luke was literally alone with the heavy task of rebuilding a religious order that was gone and destroyed long before he even learned about it, and at the same time he had to patch together his own family and atone for his father’s sins. This is a crushing burden for anyone to carry. It was important both for Rey and for the audience to meet Luke to see that he was a good man, but still just a man.

When Luke spoke openly to Rey about the failure of the Jedi Order, it was the first time he ever spoke about it that we know of; this wisdom he obviously acquired only after his nephew’s fall to the Dark Side. Luke has understood that the ways of the Jedi were wrong; but he does not know a better alternative. Force users are still born all over the galaxy, and they have to learn to use their powers - only how? Again, Luke is not to blame. How is he to know, when the Jedi of the Old Republic had lost sight of Balance in the Force for so long that they didn’t know what it actually meant anymore? 

Same goes for Leia, the princess without a realm, who tried to rebuild the Republic after the galaxy had been terrorized by the Empire and devastated by war for many years. She assuredly did her best, but she was only human. That she failed her son is of course shocking, but after the horror she had to endure at the hands of her own father it is not surprising that she would be terrified of her son possibly going the same way. Ben, like Anakin, was crushed under a legacy and responsibility that was by far too heavy for him. The tragedy of his life and the disruption - and in the end, obliteration - of his family was another proof for the failure of the ways of the Jedi. 

All of these lessons until now were not learned from. But let’s be honest: how many of us come from dysfunctional families? If we do, was getting away from them enough to heal the wounds of the past? Did we find out what to give our children on their way in life, or did we fail them because we had not elaborated the past enough to make way for a better future? Such problems are very common, and to heal them is complicated and takes time. A “happy ending” e.g. in form of finding a new family is not enough, on the contrary, it can lead to wanting to leave the past behind, leaving wounds unhealed that will fester their way through our lives again, sooner or later. Star Wars always was an allegory of the human mind, even if deeply cloaked in symbolism. The saga also abundantly takes inspiration from the Bible, and I think it’s not coincidentally said there that the sins of the fathers are visited upon the children. 

As fans, we would have wanted to see films that cemented the Jedi as guardians of the galaxy, with the Skywalker family right at the center. Which in itself is impossible because Jedi are supposed to remain unattached, making the mere idea of a Jedi having a family absurd. If the prequels told us that the Jedi were flawed, the sequels tore down the myth of the Skywalker family. And both trilogies showed that you can’t be a Skywalker and / or a Jedi / Force user and have attachments and a happy family of your own at the same time. At least, not until now. 

 III. Film production

Many fans of old complained because the sequel trilogy implied that the “happy ending” of the original trilogy’s heroes had not been so happy after all and that after having made peace for the galaxy, they had failed to keep it that way. Other viewers however liked the new trilogy and new characters right away and began to root for them. But they, too, jumped on the blame train when the trilogy had ended: expectations were not met, and now director, producers, script writers, cutters etc. are faulted all over again.

The first person coming up with the idea of Han’s and Leia’s only child turning to the Dark Side was Lucas himself. It always was a main theme of the saga that war separates people who actually belong together, like family, couples or close friends; that is not played for mere drama, but because it emphasizes the absurdity of war.

We as the audience do not know how production went - it is very possible that Lucas approved the general storyline, and there is always a whole team on board. It is not easy to purchase such a large and immensely popular franchise; it was to be expected that if things went not the way the audience expected, the Disney studios would be blamed harshly for having “ruined Star Wars”. With the prequels, at least Lucas was still at the helm; it was conceded that maybe he had lost his magic touch with storytelling, but certainly not that he was trying deliberately to ruin his own creation. And the fans who could not praise the Disney studios enough after The Last Jedi came out, now blame them over and over.

The Disney studios have long-term politics to consider and contracts to observe, and we don’t know their contents. We have every right to be disappointed, but I think it’s not fair to blame one or a particular group of persons who are trying their best to satisfy as many viewers as possible. If they simply wanted to satisfy the average dudebro who sees nothing but clichés, two-dimensional characters and Good against Evil - then why did they allow The Last Jedi to be produced in the first place? The studios obviously are aware that there are fans out there who are ready to look deeper in the saga’s themes, who wish to see the Force coming to Balance, who value family, friendship and love over “victory at any cost”, and who do not place the Jedi on some kind of pedestal.

In a sense, The Rise of Skywalker seems like a bow before The Last Jedi: the weakest chapter of the saga followed one of its strongest. Maybe the authors were aware that equaling or even topping what Rian Johnson had created would be next to impossible, so they patched up the open threads of The Force Awakens together with some fan service hoping to be out of the business as quickly as possible.

In retrospect, the infamous podcast with Charles Soule might also be tell-tale: Soule obviously is not elbows-deep in the saga and largely ignores its subtext. Since his The Rise of Kylo Ren comics are quite well-made, I assume that the general storyline did not stem from his own creativity and that he only carried out what he had been advised to do. The production of the whole sequel trilogy may have happened in a similar way. I am not excusing the poor choices of The Rise of Skywalker; merely considering that one or a few persons cannot be blamed in a studio that has thousands of creative minds on board.

I am still hoping for the next trilogy to finally bring Balance to the galaxy, and also into the fandom. Rian Johnson had negotiated the rights for the next trilogy along with The Last Jedi; I assume it is very possible that there was a clause about intellectual property saying that only he would continue Episode VIII’s topics, nobody else. This would at least be an explanation, given the embarrassing, jumbled mess that Episode IX was.

The overall title of the saga assuredly never wanted to inspire the audience to start online wars attacking the studios or the actors or other fans out of the conviction of being entitled to blame someone else’s worldview. The saga’s message is compassion. Both George Lucas and the Disney studios are telling us their story; the idea and the rights do not belong to us. Harping on “whose fault” it allegedly is won’t bring us anywhere; what we can do is make the studios understand that we’re not too stupid not to understand the subtext, the symbolism and metaphysics of the saga beyond the action story. If they listened to the Last Jedi haters, in all fairness they are bound to listen to us, too. 😊

  IV. Will Ben’s story continue?

My husband already warned me years ago that Ben most probably wouldn’t survive, or at least not get a happy ending. As Kylo Ren he had already been the head of a criminal organization for six years at the start of The Force Awakens, but all of that perhaps could still have been condoned within the scope of war. It was the very personal and intentional act of patricide, the killing of an unarmed, forgiving man, who turned him into a damned person. And after the deed, Ben was aware of it. He knew there was no way out for him, he had gone too far.

Many members of the audience did not understand that Kylo / Ben is not an out-and-out villain and that this narrative ultimately was about his redemption. Bringing him back to the Resistance after the Exegol battle alive and by Rey’s side would not have been accepted; how was Rey to explain everything when she hardly understood it herself? How would the audience have reacted to the former head of a criminal organization, a patricide, suddenly standing out as a hero? Remember how in Return of the Jedi Luke asked Vader to come away with him. Now suppose Vader had complied? It would have seemed (and been) sheer madness. Nobody would have believed neither father nor son that the terror of the galaxy had had a sudden turn of heart. Nobody knew that he was Luke’s father; Luke himself did not know Anakin’s backstory; nobody knew what had transpired between Luke and Vader so far. Yes, Ben was young and healthy, but he still had terrorized the galaxy for years and killed his own father. He knew himself that he was damned and could not go back to normality, as Vader did.

Rey was coded as the heroine: narratively, the sequel trilogy was her story. Ben couldn’t become the hero, with or without her, at the very last moment. She usurped power like her grandfather in his time, the Skywalker family was obliterated the way the Jedi were, she takes over another mantle (Skywalker) the way Palpatine did (becoming the Emperor). Balance in the Force never was truly in the cards, it was only vaguely hinted at in The Last Jedi by the Force mosaic in the Ahch-To temple. Balance is a complex and difficult subject; it would have been extremely difficult to develop it in the sequel trilogy together with introducing the new characters and giving the old ones closure.

However: if Ben is brought back in the next trilogy, his sacrifice for Rey will have been his atonement. If his role this time is not that of the villain but of the hero, it would reverse Anakin’s path and make clear that he no longer is the same man. Vader was redeemed, not rehabilitated. His grandson might still have the chance to go that way.

- Luke had promised Rey a third lesson, and it happened. He also had promised Ben to “see him around”, which has not taken place yet.

- On Tatooine, Rey watches the twin suns setting, same as Luke before he met the other half of his soul (his twin sister) again.

- The studios had said that the sequels would be “very much like the prequels”; the prequels were a tragedy where the Dark Side (Palpatine) won that was followed by a fairy tale where the Light Side won.

- The Skywalker saga is closed, so if Ben comes back it would be justified by his being a Solo, i.e. the story of his own family and not his grandfather’s.

- Given the parallels with Beauty and the Beast, the Beast died before the broken spell brought him back, making him a wholly new person - his past identity, purged and redeemed.

- George Lucas repeatedly said that the prequels and the classics belong together as one narrative, with Anakin Skywalker at its center. First news of the next trilogy came up with The Last Jedi. Since there are strong parallels between Ben and his grandfather, we may assume that this six-chapter instalment will be his; Anakin also was left for dead but came back with a wholly different role and name.

- When Anakin was reborn as Darth Vader, he “rose” slowly from the ground, clad in his black armor. Ben fell to the ground abruptly and shed his black clothes, disappearing. This could be another clue. (It was also already speculated that Leia’s body dissolved exactly in this moment because she gave her life-force to her son for him to have another chance to live. Both Han and Luke had done what they could to atone for their remorse towards Ben; this might be her turn.)

- Much as I love Luke Skywalker, I can understand that Lucas did not see him as the saga’s protagonist. The overall arch is not so much about Luke’s heroism than about Anakin’s redemption and atonement. It is unusual because we expect the story’s “hero” to be the one who kills the Bad Guy; and indeed Anakin is, because he kills Palpatine in the end, the twist being that technically he is also a villain though not the archvillain.

- Ben had promised Anakin he would finish what he started. Anakin had been meant to bring Balance to the Force, and he had started a family. Until now, Ben did neither.

- If Ben and Rey are a dyad, i.e. one soul in two bodies, then Rey is in urgent need of her soulmate for her future tasks. She has her friends of course, but none of them gets her the way he did.

So, I still see reason to hope for a continuation, and, hopefully, satisfying conclusion of The Last Jedi’s themes.

  Film production: on a side note…

In the Nineties, Kirk Wise and Gary Trousdale were the directors both of Beauty and the Beast and Atlantis: two more different stories are hardly imaginable with regard to everything - drawing style, setting, characters, development, music etc. This outcome can’t have been only due to the director’s choices, there must have been a wholly different idea behind both films right from the beginning. Just saying.

[the-citrus-scale]

In Defense Of Edward Cullen

Twilight fans around the world are rejoicing because Midnight Sun, the unfinished retelling of the saga from vampire Edward Cullen’s perspective, finally has a release date. As we all begin to revisit one of our favorite stories in all of its forms, and as we wait for Edward’s opinion on the tumultuous events of his romance with human Bella Swan, I’m also reminded that Edward often gets a very bad rap from both fans and haters alike. While I’m not saying that all his behavior is defensible, I’d like to land on the side of him being more good than bad, and take this moment to point out that you cannot remove the fact that he is a vampire from the equation when putting his actions into context throughout the series.

Edward has been alone, at least in a romantic sense, for over 100 years by the time he meets Bella in Twilight. While he has a loving family, he has been living around their perfect pairings. When they go off for private time with each other, he’s left alone with his thoughts, and that’s not a great place for him to be. While Edward has mostly managed to ignore his vampiric urges when it comes to feeding on humans, he still thinks that he is inherently an evil monster with no soul. Think about how anxious you might feel if you’ve had a bad day or if you feel like you’ve failed at something, and multiply that by 100 years of no sleep, being mentally overwhelmed because you can read minds, and being left alone with your extremely dark thoughts. It’s no wonder he’s in a bad place when he meets Bella.

Additionally, Edward has no idea what to do in a romantic situation. He was human in the early 1900s, when courtship was very different, so he has no idea how to date from a modern perspective. And, of course, he’s thrown off by the fact that he’s a vampire and Bella is a human. His family’s partners were either turned by them or other members of the family before they were romantically involved, or met when they were already vampires. He has absolutely no frame of reference for a vampire/human relationship except that it’s a bad idea because vampires naturally want to eat humans. It’s fairly natural that he gets extremely awkward when trying to figure out how to interact with Bella. There is also another layer of difficulty added because Edward can’t read Bella’s mind. Most of his interactions with humans are informed by knowing their thoughts so he can react in the correct way, and he loses that advantage with Bella, which leads him to seek out other ways to learn more about her without just talking to her because he’s trying not to get her hopes up.

I’m not going to defend Edward for sneaking into Bella’s room and watching her sleep at night. That’s definitely weird, all right? The only reason fans forgive him for this is because we retroactively realize that he never meant her any harm, and didn’t cause any. Bella also forgives him for this particular behavior, giving him a sort of backwards consent to have watched her. Yes, it’s problematic, because that’s not really the way it works, but since nothing bad came of it, we gloss over it, and frankly, we’re going to continue to do so.

Most of the issues people have with Edward actually come after the whole watching Bella sleep thing. For the rest of Twilight, he’s on his best behavior, and goes to great lengths to protect Bella. Even in New Moon, he only leaves her because he’s trying to make things better for her. It’s really in Eclipse when all of the stuff people question starts. So let’s make a quick list and tackle these all at once. People don’t like that they feel like Edward keeps Bella away from her other friends, particularly Jacob. He doesn’t want her to be alone with Jacob or any of the werewolves, especially because he isn’t allowed to venture into their territory, so he can’t protect her while she’s there. They also feel that Edward coerces Bella into marrying him by denying her sex and the promise of him being the one to turn her into a vampire. And they have serious issues with him wanting to get rid of their baby when Bella discovers she’s pregnant in Breaking Dawn.

I get it. When you look at these actions out of context like this, they all seem bad. But when you add in all of the vampire and werewolf stuff, Edward’s actions make a lot more sense. First of all, Bella never really has friends in Forks. She has at least a month to make friends before she really gets wrapped up in the mystery of Edward and starts to fall in love with him, and it never really happens, despite the fact that there are many receptive candidates. Yes, later, Bella has to be careful of what she says because she can’t reveal Edward’s vampiric status to the world, but that is not what creates a barrier between Bella and other people. She never had friends in Phoenix either, so this is not a situation Edward creates. Jacob is really Bella’s closest friend besides the Cullens, especially after the events of New Moon. But even in terms of Jacob, Edward’s behavior isn’t unnecessarily controlling. Edward is worried that Jacob, or any of the other werewolves, will not be able to control themselves and hurt Bella, and his fear is not unfounded. Emily was scarred by Sam when he changed unexpectedly, and Sam loves Emily more than anything. He never wanted to hurt her, but he did anyway. And a werewolf doesn’t even have to be mad at someone to erupt. They can just be too emotional, and whoever happens to be standing next to them is going to bear the physical brunt of that emotion. Edward is jealous of Jacob, yes, but he trusts Bella. It’s just that he doesn’t want her to get hurt. Also, he is 100% on Bella’s side when Jacob kisses her against her will, and I think he should get a lot of credit for that.

Finally, we come to the issue of Edward and Bella’s half-vampire baby. When Edward realizes that Bella is pregnant, he is terrified, and rightfully so. Even Carlisle didn’t know that a vampire/human pregnancy was possible, and that’s saying something, since he has centuries of medical knowledge related to both the natural and supernatural. Edward is afraid that the baby will be an uncontrollable monster like an immortal child, because that’s the only example he has to go on. He can also eventually see the very real medical evidence that the baby is killing Bella. Once Edward realizes that the baby isn’t a monster, he is entirely on board with Bella waiting to give birth before she becomes a vampire, even though he’s still worried about her. If Bella were having a human baby, he never would have thought twice about her keeping it. The only reason he protested was because he had literally no idea what they were dealing with. His reaction is entirely fair.

Is Edward a perfect romantic hero? Of course he’s not. Honestly, most romantic heroes aren’t perfect. But I think he gets a worse reputation than he deserves. Maybe some will go easier on him after we hear in his take this upcoming August. Maybe not. Either way, I’m excited to experience his story all over again, because while it might not be perfect, it is perfectly happy.