#i hope someone else resonates with this rant

[alwaystochocolate]

Oh my gosh this is just. Such a useful thing to do for office life too.

Please. Stop asking where a file is on the cloud-based storage platform without looking it up first. You can run a search in sharepoint and Google drive; if you remember part of the title it'll come up faster than it took to ask! Also remember to like, use the filing system - naming conventions for folders are there for precisely this reason. Can't find by searching likely title keywords? Narrow down to likely folders and take a quick browse!

Not sure how to perform a function on excel, or do a thing on Monday.com? Look it up - there is usually documentation or a reddit thread or a bajillion youtube vids about how to do it.

Please stop asking what the password is for a shared online tool or platform - use a password manager in your browser or look it the gd up in the handover document.

Also please. Please just log in to the shared email and look up your own verification code instead of asking someone else to log in and tell you it. Listen. The password is in the handover notes/password manager that your org uses.

Yes! If you get stuck, then absolutely ask for help and mention what you've already tried. Don't fruitlessly look for a file for 15 minutes. But showing that you've taken initiative and then come to ask will make the people helping you a lot more inclined to do so again.

This also applies more generally to the "where is X" and "what do we do when Y" types of questions. Have a think first. Look it up. Try it yourself first. Turn it on and off again. Etc.

It's annoying to be interrupted endlessly with small questions that don't take much time individually, sure, but accumulate and also cause you to lose focus each time.

It's also annoying when you're treated like a convenient shortcut, or coworkers expect you to know everything, when all you're doing, a lot of the time, is searching something the godamn up. (Although I concede the pt, sometimes you get asked stuff so often/actually use the file paths & so you do have it memorised. But still. Make an effort, folks).

*Gets down from podium*

OK thanks.

It is incredibly important to train yourself to have your first instinct be to look something up.

Don't know how to do something? Look it up.

See a piece of news mentioned on social media? Look it up.

Not sure if something is making it to the broader public consciousness, either because you don't see it much or you see people saying nobody is talking about it? Look it up.

Don't know what a word means? Look it up.

It will make you a better reader and a better writer, but it will also just make you more equipped to cope with the world.

So often, I see people talking about something as though it is the first time anyone has ever acknowledged it, when I've been reading reports about it on the news for months or years. Or I see someone totally misinterpreting an argument because they clearly don't know what a word means--or, on the other hand, making an argument that doesn't make sense because they aren't using words the right way.

Look things up! Check the news (the real news, not random people on social media)! Do your research! You (and the world) will be better for it.

[wuiliburt]

guys i really miss the dsmp

i don't care if this is cringe or unrelatable but i kinda just need to get it out

like today i randomly got recommended a Technoblade compilation video and in it was some clips from the dsmp which sent me on a spiral to see what the members are up to now (there mostly inactive, get little views or have moved on with their lives) and watching those old clips made me really sad because i really miss being apart of a fanbase like that even though their was some weird stuff that kinda ruined it but still! also idgaf about what anyone says, it was an amazing time of life and i wish i could go back and re-experience it

[marsprincess889]

Astrology rant

I hope astro blogs and astro lovers read this

...

Hi guys I hope you're doing well🤍

These months(17 of them?) of running an astro blog have made me see a variety of opinions regarding a lot of things, mainly_ astrology.

I want to say that this is obviously social media and it's barely a solid, reliable place for sharing or getting info, but on the other side of this, the freedom of internet and, at least relative anonimity can produce truly remarkable insights/statements that you won't see anywhere else. You can never know how true or untrue someone can be unless you really read what they've written(or listen to what they've recorded) and take it in.

But it is still so rare for me to find a blog that shares most of my views. I mean, anyone with an access to internet can start an astrology blog. It's so easy to copy and paste articles on the internet and put them here. They can get thousands of notes and people will believe them and share that unverified info that's been distorted through copying and repetition, to others(which is a whole another, very sad story).

And on most days I just mind my business and work on myself, not wanting to even go close to that energy. I might politely comment on posts that seem false to me, just expressing my suspicions or opinions and asking for theirs in return, but to be very honest, I am tired of seeing the same faulty takes and overall approach. So here are some things that, to me, are just ???? so questionable to say the least(with added reasons):

1. Mixing Vedic and Western

In many ways.

Outer planets that are only used in Western? Sure, here are descriptions and "observations" of them in Vedic nakshatras.

Asteroids that Vedic does not look at? Here are explanations of them in nakshatras too. (But there's an exception that I talk about later)

Western composite and synastry aspects? Yeah here is their analysis based on Vedic charts.

And so many more.

It's not a question of whether their "formulas" mix or not, but a question of integrity and of what you follow.

2. Nakshatras in D9(navamsa) and other divisional charts (!)

Whyyyyyy. Just tell me why.

I don't think anyone who uses nakshatras in any divisional chart has really thought about it.

And before they make say to me something like "you should be open minded" or "people resonate with it"(people are complex and can resonate to many things but nakshatras in divisional charts are not the explanation behind that), they should just read my post on my pinned masterlist about that.

Like I'm this 🤏 close to launching an inquisition to just call out every blog who does this, because it's alarming how many people can defend an illogical point with such unwillingness to see the opposite take.

I feel strongly about this one and I kinda judge people who go with it.

There are no nakshatrs in D9 cause divisional signs are hypothetical, nakshatras are actual stars in the sky. Case closed.

3. Asteroid obsession

Look guys, I love asteroids as much as the next person, if not more. And it makes sense for astrology lovers to be really into asteroids, since astrology is mythological already and asteroids open up a whole variety of different mythological associations and, with them, the potential of embodying them.

But here's where most people can reach error: asteroids cannot be holding the same influence/power as other planets.

There are so many posts with lengthy descriptions of asteroid placements in signs, houses or them aspecting planets with sextiles, trines(those aspects don't matter in most cases when it comes to asteroids).

I think asteroids only ever really hold power if they are closely(4 degrees at most) conjunct or opposite big three or other important planets, and important planets/points are unique to each chart. Asteroid interpretation requires realness with yourself and others and, more importantly, common sense. And yeah, you can interpret them in nakshatras ONLY IF they are tightly conjunct an important planet and you have some examples.

I've seen a lot of obsession with asteroids such as Lilith, Aphrodite, Sirene, Groom, Briede.

Yeah online astrology can generate the need to compare yourself to others, which is silly, cause all charts are unique and have a unique beauty, and there's no such things as "more" or "less" unique anything.

4. Making stuff up

Ok here I'm talking about takes that are barely backed by valid examples.

Like when a blog attributes a theme or a pattern to a placement that has not a lot in common with its original association and/or is backed by examples that are not really viable.

Like when someone says: "Ashwini is associated with .......(insert some specific scenario/trope). Examples: *this actor*_ mars in Ashwini, *this actress*_ D9 ketu in Ashwini(are you for real...), *this person*_ their D393747838 Mercury in Ashwini, time unspecified so might be Bharani."

I know this sounds exaggerated(the last example obviously is) but I've really seen blogs where mars or venus or mercury(jupiter and saturn too) are used as exmaples for a nakshatra. And I've seen a whole blog that focuses on D60 ketu nakshatras a lot.

Now, I think that stems from a desire to associate specific feelings/vibes and themes that they are into with placements that they most likely have, in a way that feels original. But you can't just take vague feelings/suspicions and present them as logical observations or facts, it doesn't work like that😭

A lot of "vibes" or feelings that I had about nakshatras did turn out to be true, but I had to wait to find proof myself, and sometimes the observations can change a little after discovering solid examples and it makes it all clear.

5. Shallow Stereotyping

I know, astrology is built on "strerotypes", but to me they're more archetypes.

A lot of narrow stereotyping can come from more influential astrologers.

This is especially common in Vedic astrology and with people who follow Claire Nakti.

For example, with her, I love how she uses art and real life people as examples but she too can make mistakes. And she has, and if she discovers them, she adds them as disclaimers in her descriptions.

I think sometimes she can be narrow with her observations, which isn't necessarily bad, but when people see those as undisputably true and more important than their own or other astrologers' observations, then it is.

For example, she made 3 videos about Bharani but I still think she missed some important themes because she was stuck on providing more and more detail for the same point😭

Trusting influential astrologers blindly and quoting/paraphrasing them to prove their own points is a real epidemic.

Just fyi, crediting them while proving their point with your own examples is not the same.

So, anyone can make mistakes, and everyone should be open to changing their mind, but never without real examples and proof.

6. Style over substance

Possibly the biggest problem that is the root of most of other problems in this "community".

The reason why astrology became pop is because of simplifications and, more importantly, flashy images and words.

I've already made a post about how harmful I think the irresponsibility of sharing faulty astrological info is. I'm disturbed by all that manic energy around a thing that should be low-pressure but valid and educational.

I don't think astrology is meant to help you make desicions in a direct way, or to be used as the ultimate filter to judge others and look at the world. It's not the end-all be-all truth at all, not at all. But it is something that a lot of people take seriously and I just have little to no respect for blogs that use AI or don't care for logic or facts.

People here can argue and defend AI in astrology😭 they can irresponsibly make contradictory statements, have no verified observations of their own whatsoever and still act like the expert while interacting or posting.

That's all I wanna say about this right now.

...

Comment, reblog, message me, like even, whatever. I want to know what others think about any of this.

[zetomato]

Brand New One (rant)

I need to understand something so I really want people to answer and tell me because I know my viewpoint on the QSMP cannot physically be perfect and whole.

I haven’t watched any POV in a few days (Due to being sick af, lel) but I’m hearing more and more confusing things coming from this fandom. I’ll point out some of them and hope people will explain more points of view to clear up the extremely confusing situations. (While tagging this neg because I don't want this on main for peeps trying to chill)

Ok so we can all agree that it’s impossible to watch everyone’s POV. Just taking the more active streamers gives you over 9h/day to watch, taking into account that they often are live at the same time and you get already more than anyone should watch their screens in a day (I say that as a Graphic Designer, I keep watching screens, that’s my job). Add everyone else and you got easily over 20h/day. So yeah, for viewers, that’s intense. So it’s even more impossible for streamers since, well, they have to plan their streams and… stream.

Good.

So why are people mad at Philza for not knowing Tubbo lore that happened while he wasn’t on the server, some even when he was streaming something else? I know that there’s always that weird moment when something happens for the character you main and then you switch POV and the information doesn’t line up, but why is it expected? Getting super into a storyline is incredible, it’s nice, it’s saying how immersive someone’s RP and storytelling is, how much it resonates with you. But this is live RP, not a script. People will read tones wrong, mishear/misunderstand, make mistakes, talk at the wrong time, mess with friends, have the wrong timing. A bunch of weird stuff will happen.

None of them are doing this out of spite, hell, they are making a point to make sure everyone is included and supported and they have ways to talk to each other when there’s a problem. The ones I know of who do chat with others/in other’s chat are Phil, Tubbo, Cellbit and Etoiles. (there are way more, those are the ones I saw do it/heard say it)

Then there’s the question of doing a critique of the CC’s under the guise of “Oh it’s about the character!”

Yes, QSMP and RP servers in generals bring you HARD into a story to the point sometimes things are hard to differentiate. I’ve reread books and got confused about something before I realized that they were headcanon things I grabbed from fanfics and not canon book events. But some of y’all need to step back. I saw people doing critiques of someone’s laugh or gesture or playstyle under the “Q!” excuse. These are real people, y’all. A CC not reading the room, Tubbo talking loudly over Bagi because he didn’t notice the situation and adjusting when told, Philza not immediately getting that Tubbo’s death was his canon last one and then adjusting to follow the mood. There’s been dozens of those situations since the start of the server, there will be a dozen more.

The players can deal with those situations themselves, they are adults, but I’ve seen some people on here getting weird information and spreading even weirder gossip about a character being mean/rude/an ass when they’re sharing friendly banter or just, not immediately getting a joke or an important moment.

No, Tubbo was not planning on talking over Bagi, he had a lot to say and didn’t notice everything.

No, Phil was not ignoring Tubbo’s lore, he was unaware this death was canon and did not watch a stream while he was already streaming.

People are people. CCs play Characters and aren’t professional actors with scripts. They chill in each other's chats sometimes.

Can we now play nice and take a chill pill about streamers being mean and heartless?

[namgyunation]

Hey!☁️🫶🏻

Since you’ve been interested to write a Nam-gyu x reader fic, that takes place in the games, and you were open for some ideas, I’d love to share some thoughts with you! I though a lot before writing... Prepare yourself because it’s kinda long. So sorry in advance 😭

His character is so intense, so layered, and I think there’s so much potential for a dark, tension-filled story that explores his possessiveness, his downfall, and his unresolved feelings for the reader.

So here’s what I was thinking:

-The reader was Nam-gyu’s ex before the Games. She left him after he spiraled into drugs, lost all their money in crypto, and refused to change. He begged her to stay, but by then, she had already given up on him ( It’s up to you if you want a backstory for the reader and her financial struggles, I also have some ideas but I don’t want to exaggerate)

Now, months later, they unknowingly enter the Games separately. And when they see each other again it’s pure shock followed by bitterness, masked under arrogance (from my man Nam-gyu ofc).

But here’s the thing: the more she avoids him, the more obsessed he becomes. She left him once. She won’t leave him again.

Now here it’s up to you again because I have mixed feelings : Would he protect her? Would he punish her for walking away? Would he try to control her just to prove she still belongs to him? I don’t really know I want to hear your vision too.

- After the second challenge, another male player gets too close to the reader. Maybe the reader sees Nam-gyu in the first game but hides from him. They come face to face during the team selection for the second game. Thanos is doing his thing, asking female players to join. And after she turns around, he’s shocked realising it’s her. And here comes Dae-ho (because he was searching for the fifth player to join his team and I also love him so much ahaha) and the reader grabs Dae-ho, claiming he’s her teammate.

- Later that night, nam gyu corners her: "You think he can protect you? You think anyone here gives a fuck about you like I do?"

- There’s a fight, a push against the wall, lips too close but not touching - just raw, burning tension. (Maybe create the bathroom scene if you re comfortable. Smth smutty. But again up to you 🤭)

- Maybe he grabs her chin, forcing her to look at him. 🧎🏻‍♀️ (I fantasise too much about this guy, I have a problem)

- maybe a challenge forces them to work together (Mingle).

- maybe he gets hurt after the fight in the bathroom, and for the first time, she sees his mask slip.

"Why are you still trying to fix me?" "Because I don’t know how to stop."

I love to make myself suffer 💀.

I feel like Nam-gyu’s dynamic with the reader could be so intense, so addictive, so painful in all the best ways. He’s too far gone, but when it comes to her, she’s the only thing that makes him feel something real.

So this was my crazy rant, hope it helped 🥲 from these ideas you can choose what resonates with you. Let me know how you feel about this. Have a lovely daaaaay💗

omg ☁️ !!! this was such a treat to read LMAOO don't be sorry!!! i love hearing abt other people's ideas and soaking up long walls of text so bad <3 thank u for taking the time to type this up and share it with me :)))

prob gonna yap in response to ur thoughts + add in some of my own, so this is under a read more...

HEHE.... dae-ho mentioned!!!! although i never really talk about him, dae-ho is another one of my fav characters bc of my friend haha. i'll try to do him justice when i'm writing him!!!! he's so sweet :) i think i could see some fun scenarios transpiring between reader and nam-gyu with dae-ho thrown into the mix. dae-ho is so sweet, protective, and respectful towards jun-hee, i no doubt imagine it would be the same with anyone else. even though there's nothing romantic about him and reader's interactions with each other, just dae-ho being a genuinely nice, caring guy, it'd make for some good rage bait for someone resentful and insecure like nam-gyu LOLLL

now i'm sitting here pondering... because of how little we know (in canon) about nam-gyu, i'd say it's pretty up in the air as to how he'd react to seeing an ex in the games that he's on bad terms with, and it could honestly go any of the ways that you listed! i personally think because of how prideful and bitter he is, he wouldn't go up to her right away for sure or even want her to know that he saw her/cares, because that would be giving her the satisfaction of knowing he still loves her / wants her back, and the thought of someone seeing him in that state again would make him mad.

put in that situation, i could see him pretending to be indifferent and so focused on himself after they initially see each other in desperate hope that she'd either approach him first or think that he dgaf, has been doing great without her, and moved on (he hasn't). i think it'd be especially sensitive for him because this is a long separation, months, and logically, by now he shouldn't still be hung up on her, but ofc he is bc he's a loser.

probably has to force himself not to look for where she's sitting during the pentathlon (because that'd be a weak thing to do, and then she'd know he gaf...). his team goes before hers, they pass duhh, and then he once again has to pretend like he's not about to short circuit waiting for her team to come through alive (and ofc gi-hun's team is last!!!). once he sees her and knows she's fine he goes on to say the "oh how many roaches do u think are left," thing, trying to play off the fact that he wasn't about to lose his mind.

thennn, when night comes and she still hasn't come up to him :] i'll go onto the part that u requested where he confronts her! i'll see what i can do with that and try to stay true to ur request >:)

i think his general behavior towards her would be him desperately trying to play off how much he really cares, but when it comes down to it, he is worried about her and tries to protect her, though he tries to do it in a way that doesn't show just how much he gaf, and he resents himself for just how much he does care.

when i write i usually just make a loose outline and then free ball that shit from there, so i'll try to add in some fun stuff and other character interactions to pad out the story! i'll prob write up to the aftermath of gi-hun's plan, just bc i don't wanna speculate too much on what games come after orrr what nam-gyu's fate is in s3....😭😭

[thehallsofmandos]

Just ATTUNE already

It's days like this that I wish I weren't an HSP. I wish I were numbed out, blinkered, emotionally calloused and blissfully unaware like so many seem to be.

I am so fucking S I C K and tired of having to teach people how to hold space for me. And this applies bigtime to men, but not only to men by a long stretch.

I am not one to ordinarily complain about having to do emotional labour. I enjoy doing it, it feels like a strength of mine (though, of course, I'm not perfect at it), it makes me feel useful, it gives me opportunities to live up to my highest values. It's one of my favourite things in life - being there for people and just holding space for them to feel and express. But fuck me when I'm in distress and it's someone else's turn to attune to me. CRICKETS. I am sooooo over being people's emapthy coach at the times when I'm my most vulnerable. So incredibly, incredibly over it.

Ok... this rant is also over now. I hope this resonates with someone out there.

[lilithyvenus]

talk your shit! silencing yourself is active self harm - pick a card reading

hi bambinos ❤️ thank you for your support! it's bittersweet to know the mother wound reading resonated, but i'm comforted by knowing it was helpful. now that it's a wednesday, let's address how holding our tongues tells our inner children that what they have to say still doesn't matter. even anger needs to be voiced. my Black women and nbs, i'm talking to you especially here.

for people with marginalized identities, you speaking up is the very least you can do for your ancestors. i'm southern african; my grandmas were maids for white south africans just 60 years ago, and for their own safety, they had to silence and censor themselves. i have had to recognize this and if you can't do it for yourself, do it for the people whose compliance ensured your presence here, now. you better fuck shit up!

channeled songs

- mad by solange

- under the table by fiona apple

- fsu by fidlar

- eartha by jamila woods

- wannabe by the spice girls

today's pile selection is my collage art :3

group one

the song referenced in the collage you chose is starring role by marina.

your cards: two of pentacles + five of cups + queen of cups in reverse + queen of pentacles

you seem to be under the impression that there's a time limit to grief and healing, and there isn't. please, if you're not talking about it because you fear everyone is tired of you bringing it up, where will the burden you're carrying live besides in you? it will always feel like we're doing too much when we give ourselves time to dwell in our sorrow because we're socialized to prioritize productivity over health. you don't need other people to validate you to make the pain justifiable – you feel it and that's enough. by talking to someone patient, you will let yourself gradually let more light in. i stress that they have to be patient, because you don't need someone who makes you consider for a second that you revisiting the grief over and over is burdensome. for those of you who feel alone in this, please use the kokobot here. it isn't 100% effective, but it's knowing that there's someone else put there who doesn't need to know you to be warm and supportive of you. baby yourself too! what tf are they gonna do, unbaby you?

channeled media

heartaches by patsy cline

do it for her from steven universe

eternal sunshine of the spotless mind (2004)

the year of magical thinking by joan didion

wake up alone (the demo/original version) by amy winehouse

lonely comin' down by dolly parton

group two

the song referenced in the collage you chose is just the same but brand new by st vincent.

your cards: seven of pentacles + queen of pentacles in reverse + knight of pentacles in reverse + magician

you're allowed to be exasperated with the way things are going. did someone tell you you can't be pessimistic or it'll undo your manifestations? that is something people who already come from privilege say – of course you didn't have negative thoughts, bank of mum and dad is always on it! you're putting the physical work in but you aren't seeing the progress you like, and both that lack of physical progress and your annoyance are okay! please talk about it, rant and rave about it, but don't let yourself lose hope completely. you might be too focused on one aspect that isn't where you want it to be, but don't minimize what you've accomplished already. talk to your ancestors and guides. they are your relatives and they have your highest good in mind, they don't mind you ranting to them. in fact, outright ask them to show you how to shift your focus while they work in your favour. also, your words hold weight so you may as well affirm that your doubt doesn't chase away what is meant for you. also, idk who needs to hear this but sevdaliza has been making music for over ten years now and charli xcx for over fifteen, and they got their undeniable mainstream success last year. notably, both brown women embracing their outsider status. imagine if charli's legacy was boom clap.....

channeled media

there's gotta be something better than this from sweet charity

after the storm by kali uchis

fetch the bolt cutters + shameika by fiona apple

waiting for godot (if you can, watch a bootleg of the stage play)

rhode by sevdaliza

group three

the song referenced in the collage you chose is window seat by erykah badu. it's also inspired by the rock scene in everything everywhere all at once.

your cards: seven of pentacles + six of swords in reverse + knight of wands + strength

is someone dealing with a fuckboy? i hope they die. that's not a bit, i'm so serious. but in general, someone is playing in your face and there's only so much diplomacy you can practice when the other person can't respect you enough to at least let you know they can't deliver + give you what you need. would you do what they're doing to someone else, especially someone you claim to hold dearly? we often fall into the trap of projecting our morals onto other people, and we get hurt because unfortunately, some people have no home training. this person needs a tongue lashing and don't spare yourself. the relief you are going to feel after telling them about themselves is worth it. actually, it's what you deserve since they can't deliver or even own up to their failing you.

channeled media

stfu! by rina sawayama

gettin' in the way by jill scott

army of me (feat. skunk anansie) by bjork

bossy by kelis

these boots are made for walking by nancy sinatra

1, 2, 3 & tut tut tut by the tuts

[siriuslysatorusimping]

Hi, Kiko! I have two questions for you- 1.) I saw you mention that while you love how much Rinko has resonated with people, there's a big part of you that doesn't really want to share her- does that mean you would prefer if we didn't use her as a cosplay option when at conventions? I don't want to overstep by pulling that cosplay out if it makes you uncomfortable. 2.) Do you have advice for writing? In college, I studied English creative writing alongside psych and neuroscience and I used to write all the time. However, since starting grad school, I haven't been able to make as much time for it, but with life this year, I know it would be a great outlet. I have a fanfic idea that I want to execute, but I have never been able to finish a story and developing a schedule or a timeline for both the story and to write it is daunting. Any tips from a badass writer?? Much love to you, Kiko! I hope you're taking care and taking it easy on this Monday <3

Hi Rai!!

1) I am perfectly fine with you cosplaying! I love it!! When I said I don't want to share her, it's mainly the selfish part of me that doesn't want to share her with other writers. But they do say that imitation is the highest form of flattery, so if people want to write about Rinko, I would be honored because it's so cool that a character I created is getting that much love 🥺 I loved your cosplay, so please don't stop doing that if you want to cosplay her!!!!

Okay, for your second question, I RANTED so it's below the cut 🙃

2) The best advice I have is to write for you. If nothing else, just write for you. Write as if no one else will ever see it to begin with. It provides a level of freedom like no other.

Write when you have the time. If you're able, and you want to, set time aside each day to write anything. Don't force yourself to write something just to meet someone else's expectations. That's something that's helped me with what I've been writing lately, follow the inspiration fairies, but don't force them. Find what suits you, too. I use a variety of things. I use google docs, and I use a notebook. I like physically writing things, sometimes to help get the creative juices flowing.

I've found that chasing the rabbits, even briefly, can help unblock other things. I'd been at a wall for Physical Paradox lately, but after spending a day or so on Gokudō, I was finally able to crank a bit out for Physical Paradox last night! So, just write. Write what you want to write. Whatever you feel like writing! Not all ideas have to be what you go with in the end, but it helps to just get it out to make room for other ideas.

As for the timeline? I kinda fly by the seat of my pants for most of it 😂😂 For Another Level, it was a bit easier because there was a clear 'end' to get to: canon lol. I will say that even though I had that, where we ended up was so different from how I originally intended it. But having that little end goal in sight helped me keep going. Without it, I think I would have ended up losing sight along the way. So, I would recommend having a rough timeline. But even that can develop as you go! Have a rough ending figured out, but remember that you can deviate if the story ends up going that direction!

Fun fact: Another Level is actually only the second story I've ever finished 🙃

I'm hoping to add Physical Paradox to that someday as well, though 😊

Thank you for your questions and hopefully this made sense!! 😅

[iminthetunnels]

i read smthn so interesting on someone’s blog but it would be weird for me to reblog it. so i saved it as a draft. but i wanna rant abt it. i’m going to be all over the place and probably not make sense because it applies to me, and much so like everything else, my interpretations and assumptions and experiences in the situation all together.

when a man prioritizes a friendship relationship over a romantic relationship, i get bad feelings. not only do i feel as tho i take biblical words to heart and it resonates deeply within me, but a relationship with two people &god is focused on just that. and everything else will flow as a result. okay. so i do litwrally mean to put ur relationship first before anything, in order to maintain a partnership. this could be in business, family matters, child raising etc etc. without a strong family bond, what else can follow? and of course this is entirely from my perspective and experiences.

i never in my life thought to find love again. i couldn’t bear another anxiety ridden, sexually intense relationship where i didn’t truly find myself really loved, only desired when the time is right. and it disgusted me. i found faults in pursuing relationships, because no one listened, only lusted, only desired what i can bring to the table. which in a sense is normal. that’s fine, it’s a human desire to want someone commendable. i get that. i never thought to trust someone who i could pour my heart in both anger, disgust, just regular conversation, as well as love and commitment. i thought “i will do my best with my son and show him i choose him above all” which i do. which goes right back to my first paragraph. i think a relationship rooted in god, faithfulness, commitment, will overall be my end goal. it came so organically that i have hope once more. i promise u never have to settle, u never have to worry, u never have to feel that anxiety again when ur truly motivated and loved. and looked after truly. i also feel that, as a woman, in a society and country that does not value my work or love as a person, it can get very daunting and negative. i DO find myself resonating with other women who feel trapped by a male serving society. that’s not to say i hate being a mother, or i hate being a wife. i hate devoting my life. it goes right back to what so any WOMEN AND MEN FEEL, resentment for a subpar society. i refuse to make enemies with the opposite sex and blame them. it’s life making enemies with another race and blaming them. it gets us nowhere as a whole and unity should be our end goal. instead of fighting the common man, we should be standing up to oligarchs LMAOOOO lemme stop because i’ll sound rly crazy when i explain this next part. but it’s not me, you, or the next. that’s y i do stand for all. wont dismiss that certain ppl benefit from a society. but in that sentence on its own, they benefit from an established society. not one person

[marine-mayday]

This is just a rant, you can ignore if you want x

Basically, I had a really bad day yesterday bc of a really fucking stupid thing and instead of dealing with it like I should have, I went out on a walk in the middle of the night, in the rain, alone and didn’t tell anyone. I’ve just come back from a run and I feel so much better but also really idiotic bc I hate that I did something so ridiculous. And I’ve watched too many murder docs to actually think that was a good idea. Anyway, I’m now sitting on the bottom of my stairs and I was scrolling through instagram and I saw a quote about always being second choice and that really resonated. I am so scared of not being enough or being left and being alone for the rest of my life that I don’t actually let anyone in, despite how much I might convince myself I do. And part of that quote was about looking after yourself first, which, I have to be honest, quotes like this I’ve seen previously, I always thought were a little cringy (like this post, sorry) but I actually realised it was right and that I can’t keep putting my self worth on others bc that’s never going to end well and I have to figure out a way to be ok with being by myself or I’ll never be ok with being with others.

Anyway, this whole post is a little rant bc I didn’t want to tell anyone how much I’m struggling, which is not healthy bc I know they can help but I also want to be able to look after myself. Again, not incredibly healthy but we’ll see.

I just sort of wanted someone else to know how I’m feeling, or at least feel like someone else knows what I’m feeling. I know I’ll definitely slip back into the dark place but I’m hoping I’ll be able to get myself out a bit faster and it’ll take me longer to regress. Which again, lots of quotes about this and I didn’t realise how accurate they are.

But thanks to coming to my Ted talk on my life as a mentally ill undergrad psych student.

Peace x

[airabuhan]

anon asked: Hello!! Do you have any hcs about Aira's family? I have a random hc that Aira's family is actually quite rich (but not in business-oriented family way or noble family way) bcs Aira has been collecting idol merch even before becoming idol, sometimes even excessively, that his parents lecture him about it (taken from the trivia in Aira's wiki) and I think Idol merch is quite expensive (especially merch from the popular unit)? And Aira at mainstory is only 15-16 which looks quite young to be able to buy so many idol merch

i think that aira’s family would be quite normal compared to other people’s backgrounds? not notably rich or anything, just a regular middle-class household… maybe a little more on the wealthy side for aira to have the money to save up and purchase a lot of idol merch + being able to send their son to an idol academy (despite aira’s parents being against him wanting to become an idol too, they are still paying the tuition so…) but i’d just say aira has a very normal and typical family life which i think is important because of his relationship with other characters with not-so-typical family backgrounds (namely alkaloid, but also kohaku in a sense)

having aira as someone with a more normal background compared to the rest of alkaloid highlights his insecurities even more so, because the people he’s friends with stand out in such a way that aira feels like he doesn’t in comparison. he’s kind of insecure about standing out because of his appearance but in actuality, his life isn’t all that interesting because he’s simply just a massive idol fan and relatively mediocre in ability, nothing like the expectations people have of him. so i can’t really imagine aira having anything else but a regular family that loves him. in main story, there’s a scene where aira mentions how his family doesn’t really support his idol dreams, and wants him pursue a ‘proper’ career rather than trying to become an idol which is incredibly hard and risky for all sorts of reasons, and that scene resonates with me a lot… it shows that his family loves and cares about him, and because they do so, they want him to pursue something ‘safe’ even if it doesn’t particularly align with aira’s own hopes and dreams… and how despite that familial pressure, aira pushes through because he loves idols so much, he wants to become one even if he believes he isn’t anything special. it’s a small part of aira’s character that i really love although it’s not mentioned often because his family life isn’t really all that noteworthy… so i think him having a regular family background is actually pretty important to his character building! it’s also charming to me so hghhgh

sorry for the random rant about aira’s family background it’s actually a part of his character that means a lot to me… ahaha 

 his idol collection is pretty impressive though i must say, he’s so dedicated… imagine the years of saving and collecting he must’ve done… he should have the most impressive itabags ever [Smile or comment on the answer here](https://retrospring.net/@airabuhan/a/110849853848822904)

[balletomaneblog]

About your recent ask, I'm so rooting for Daria Ionova too! Since she graduated, I never understood why she got behind from the girls her year. She is so musical, has great acting, beautiful lines and amazing port de bras! I don't know if I'm overly reacting to this, but in my opinion, she would be a great Giselle, Aurora, Masha, Juliet, Nikiya, Maria from The Fountain of Bakhchsarai, and even Odette. It's crazy that she never performed Masha in The Nutcracker! And I can only imagine how great she would be in the Kingdom of Shades. I just wished the theater would invest more in her and other dancers who are good and can improve with the right opportunities.

Right now, the MT divides itself in four types of dancers: the favorites who get all the opportunities, even when not deserved; the principals that have the least performances; the reliable ones they don't promote, but they work like crazy; and those who rarely get an opportunity and when they do, they get stuck in dancing the same role over and over, or being in the corps. Anyways, sorry about the rant lol.

Never apologize for ranting to me lol !!! Especially about Daria Ionova, as I adore her!

We know Daria got unlucky with the group that she graduated with. 2018 was an insane year for female Vaganova graduates (Khoreva, Bulanova, Nuikina, Ionova, Lendvai, Voroshilova, etc). But Daria can more than hold her own so I don't think this is entirely the problem. She debuted some of her larger roles like Gulnare right before COVID, which meant she was slowed down just as she was getting momentum, and then an injury had her out for much of last season as well.

Thankfully she's been back for awhile and she's had some debuts this season as Shyrin's Friends in Legend of Love and in the Almeh pas de trois and the Pas d'Action trio in La Fille du Pharaon. However, it frustrates me to no end that these are all smaller debuts. Out of the roles you listed I would especially love to see her as Maria in Bakhchisarai and as Giselle! And I've said before she would be a perfect Sylphide and I'd also love to see her as Le Papillon in Carnaval. Not to mention that she's always cast as First Odalisque even with Gulnare in her rep. I wish she'd get another shot at that role too.

I'm always wishing for more roles for Daria and am hoping that she finishes this season with some more debuts!

To your other points, I completely agree with you. I love following the Mariinsky and at the same time the management sometimes makes me want to hit my head against the wall. There's so many talented dancers and so few who get a real shot. I especially resonated with what you said about the "reliable ones they don't promote, but they work like crazy" and will take this as my opportunity to rant about Osmolkina who more than fits this description. In any other company she would have been promoted to principal ages ago! She dances almost everything, has amazing technique, beautiful acting skills, and brings a unique presence to the theatre. And while she dances exclusively principal roles and has a larger workload than most of the principal dancers, she was never promoted and almost definitely won't be now that she's at the very end of her career. And of course there are plenty of lower ranking dancers who have it even worse.

Anyways . . . feel free to rant on my blog anytime! And it's always good to know that there's someone else out there wishing for more opportunities for Dasha!

[deafearsdiary]

My Fish,

I absolutely HATE the way our relationship ended, but I hate the fact that it ended at all even more. I've been trying to sort my thoughts and figure out why I was feeling the way I've been feeling about everything and I figured writing this letter was a good way to do it.

When we started talking, I wasn't expecting to click with you as quickly and as much as I did. And very quickly you became my escape, my safe haven. The thing with me, is that when I feel things, I feel them entirely. And I don't know how to mask my emotions or feelings. But sometimes, they can be taken the wrong way. You know that I'm so in love with love and I just want that fairytale love to take over my life, but I'm also quite obsessed with feeling good in general too. I don't always have to be in love, it's just my favorite thing to experience. You came during a time where feeling good barely happened for me, and then all of a sudden, because of you, I did. Everyday. (btmoA)

Don't get me wrong, my life still felt pretty shitty and incomplete, and a whole lot like WTF is going on seriously, but then it was like I started secretly walking around with a rainbow in my pocket. Sometimes, when I outwardly show how much I like someone, it gets taken as me being in love. It happens more often than not because I told you, I don't know how to dial it down, but I want you to know I wasn't expecting anything from you. (And a lot of it was just things that I had to get out of my system. Cause, it's like, you're hot, how can I not flirt with you?!) But I wasn't expecting for you to like me as much as I liked you. I wasn't expecting for you to want to keep our friendship as much as I did. I wasn't expecting you to fall in love with me and ask for my hand in marriage. But you didn't even have to do any of that and I still would've liked you just as much because you're you. I honestly wasn't even expecting you to stay, because all of my favorite people leave. But I was really hoping you would've.

I was hoping that you'd unexpectedly become this constant in my life that I wouldn't even dream of being without. I was hoping that you'd stay around so long that every memory I had was invaded by your existence. And I was willing to sacrifice some of the things I wanted most to keep you with me. Because you were the ease that my soul had been begging for for such a long time. It was nice because it wasn't exactly what I had been asking for, or expecting to get. But it was what I needed. With the type of person that I am, I get attached to what I really like very quickly, so when I lose it, I'm crushed. I never learn.

I understand how complicated our relationship was for you, but I didn't see it as that all of the time. I genuinely did think of it as two people that became (sort of) best friends very quickly. I considered you that (my best friend) because everything was so easy with you. I didn't overthink the things I'd want to say to you or the responses you'd have. I wasn't obsessing over any deep conversations, or even thought about my looks with you. It wasn't stuff I worried about. Instantly I felt comfortable with you, and at home: so I was free to be me and not feel judged. Our dynamic was *chef's kiss*. So I never meant to make you feel like you were in this super tough position. Maybe some stuff I did or said resonated with you that I wasn't aware of, and for that I'm deeply sorry.

Because since we stopped speaking, not a day goes by that I don't miss being on the phone for an excessive amount of time, talking about anything that comes to mind. Or cracking up at your many accents that were (finally) as decent as mine are. I miss having the option to get on the game with you, and listening to your unorganized rants. My heart breaks at the fact that you left so quickly, and I'd give an arm and a leg (someone else's, not mine) to have you back. xoxo

Yours

P.S. Every single day something happens that I wish I could tell you about.

[blushstarot]

PICK A CARD: your favorite character celebrates your birthday!

Anon request ^^

Pick whichever picture you feel more attracted to and skip to that pile.

kinda late, but I had a lot going on, sorry! (rant and poll at the end as always). Images credits.

Pile 1

four of cups (reversed), knight of pentacles, four of wands.

I feel this character you are thinking of is either male or just gives a lot of male energy, and that they are someone who is very responsable, gentle and reliable, which means, they probable organized the party, and if is a surprise one depends on you and what you would prefer. They might have issues expressing themselves, and how they feel about you, so they are trying to express their care and appreciation through organizing the party of your dreams, from what kind of cake and decorations you'll like, to the day, hour and location of the party, they see that everything is perfect for your special day. And judging by the four of wands as the last card, I would say that they did an excellent job at it, the party was a huge success and you felt like royalty the whole time.

Also, something important to add, is that with the four of cups in reverse, I feel that they didn't invite some people that you might consider important in your life out, since they are a little stubborn with their believes, probably the people you know that won't really vibe with them was left out.

**As in all the PACs, just take what resonates and leave what doesn't, this is for entertainment only, so have fun with it!

Pile 2

king of cups, four of wands, page of pentacles (reversed).

You're probably the one that suggested that you celebrate your birthday, and I'm seeing more of a small reunion than a party, maybe even just a having a meal with your favorite character. Now this is a little complicated, but probably things didn't work out as you had planned, at first everything was really good, you were having fun, they were having fun too, and everything was going smoothly… until it wasn't. Right now, I'm seeing two main scenarios: maybe you decided to have an after party someplace else and things got out of control there, which made you leave early or just ending and send everyone home; or you had a dinner reservation for after the reunion and didn't make it on time so you lost it. Any inconvenience that might of happened, I'm sure your favorite character tried really hard to make up for it, so you could still enjoy your day and be happy, but it's really on you how you take this inconvenience and if you pull through and still have a good time.

**As in all the PACs, just take what resonates and leave what doesn't, this is for entertainment only, so have fun with it!

Pile 3

temperance, nine of cups, six of swords (reversed).

I feel that you and your favorite character get along really well, too well some might say. And not necessarily in a romantic way (so no, I'm not saying you are dating this character) but more on a "we banter a lot and are always making jokes and just having a good time" kind of way. Your relationship is really harmonious so of course they are celebrating your birthday, and what better way to do it than granting your wishes that day. You want to go to a restaurant? They take you there and pay for your meal; you want x, y or z gift? they bought it for you; you just want to stay at your place and spend a good time with them? they bring snacks, helps you set up the place, and when you're done they are cleaning for you. And some of you might love this, but I'm seeing that for some of you that all this attentions is kind of making you uncomfortable, and feel overwhelmed; if that's the case, you can ask them to stop and they'll probably do, you won't hurt their feelings, just communicate with them.

**As in all the PACs, just take what resonates and leave what doesn't, this is for entertainment only, so have fun with it!

I hope you liked it! I'm really sorry for the delay in getting this reading out, I got a new keyboard and I had to get used to it since is in English and I'm not used to the key placements (and I had some personal problems but we're not getting into that). Anyway, I think I would be able to upload normally again, so hopefully new pacs are coming soon! For any updates I'll make a post so if you want you can follow me, or just check my master list (link below) every couple of weeks to see what's new.

Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think.

You can find more of my PACs on my master list, and if you have any suggestions on future PACs you want to see me do, you can send me an ask.

Bye byeee ✨

[gabrielpage]

𝖱𝗈𝖼𝗄 𝖱𝗂𝗈𝗍 𝖭𝗂𝗇𝖾𝗍𝗂𝖾𝗌.

sʜᴀᴋᴇᴅᴏᴡɴ, 1979. ᴄᴏᴏʟ ᴋɪᴅs ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛɪᴍᴇ! ★🎸

a song so sweet it gives me toothache everytime i hear it, and who better fits the bill for this tune than haewontu? pure, lovable, full of light, and always bringing joy wherever she goes.

★

will be dedicating the second song in the playlist to wonter. a song about self-empowerment and critiquing gender roles and expectations.. i think it suits her perfectly as i always see her as someone with so much independence. would never say this to her face but i admire her a lot. i hope this song resonates with her as much as it does with me.

★

i personally think this song is just suuuuper fun and goofy, and that is exactly ohusion’s vibes. always had such a blast with you, enjoyed all the laughter you bring into my life. stay exactly as you are, never change. ;)

★

while this song speaks to farewell and moving forward, please know that me dedicating this to you, leeseoc, isn’t about saying goodbye. not now, not ever. i just love this song a lot and i think the lyrics are beautiful. and i believe beautiful song like this deserves to be heard by someone equally beautiful (inside and outside).

★

teaesan, let’s make this one a theme song for all the wild adventures we have had over the years. this song screams teenage rebellion and not giving a damn, and that is exactly how i am when i’m with you. note to you: you will always have my back no matter what.

★

this person has been through so much yet every time life knocks him down, he somehow finds the strength to stand tall on both feet again. i don’t say it often enough, but i admire him so much for his perseverance. this one is for yeontjun, please know that you can always lean on me whenever you have a rough day.

★

chaewoy and taehyuuin, even though we haven’t talked much lately.. as i have been kinda neglecting the two of you (sorry for that, will make up to it soon!), please know that i cherish our friendship more than words can say. our bond, that’s the one thing we’ve got.

★

dedicating this to my human diary, heeseungp. it’s hard for me to put into words how grateful i am for his support through every up and down. thank you, for patiently listening to my repeated rants and never growing weary. you are the bestest friend anyone could ever ask for. we will always have each other’s backs, yeah?

★

the world seems less ordinary with Thursdaylads in it. everything just seems a little brighter, a little more exciting and special. crazy how much of an impact they have on me. incredibly grateful to have crossed paths with each and every one of them, though.. including our dear manager who keeps everything running smoothly, and always indulging herself in our silly, never ending banter. 🤍__🤍

★

i thought again and again over what song i should dedicate to this one person. over the years, i have associated him with lots of songs, but i want this one to be unlike anything else i have ever sent him. i believe the lyrics we’ve been through this such a long long time, just tryin’ to kill the pain. love is always coming, love is always going describe our dynamic so well that i decided to dedicate this one for him instead.. even though this is a song about the end of a relationship. BUT i have been listening this masterpiece a lot these past weeks, and i want yeonjunr to have a listen too!

[psychelis-new]

sometimes i dont know how we are expected to enjoy something in this economy or in modern society where people seem to only really care if its about a rich person or someone whos popular or pretty and attractive. for instance if celeb passes away its such a huge deal but if its one of us it doesnt matter so much cause we dont matter or only a few handful of people would miss us compared to a celeb. or that society is so much about what someone does and how much they make from it that i feel soulless like theres so many folk who say do something bc it make u money not bc it make u happy.

im really conflicted nowadays and i dont like the state my country is in, it doesnt care about it citizens but it care more about the royals than anyone else every tome w royal member breaths they get free press but any time someome normal does something it never gets the same reception. as i said i dont think it matters anymore who does or doesnt live a long life bc it only matters what they did as a person or how society is constantly about having a following or likes comments and subscribes or is it the fact that screens are being used everywhere?

honestly i think this is the worst version of society. i dont want to have to chase people only for them to barely give effort in return but thats what i feel like i have to do bc society has its cliques online and offline. i hope this rant makes some sense and thank you v much for letting me rant!

Hello dear :) Well, there's a lot here...

Despite I understand what you mean, it's also about statistics: famous people are known by far more people than "common" (let me use this adjective, even if it's not right) people, so it's obviously natural that more people can be aware of their existence and cry over one of them passing away compared to one person known only by 20-30 people or less: famous people have the chance to "keep in touch" with/be seen by many people at the same time through what they do, cause all they do has a resonance caused by the ability they have to move markets and create capitals as well (mostly because of "common" people being so invested in them, js). For this reasons their lives are under the lenses of the world: not that good in the end, as their privacy is basically non-existant; they're supposed to share everything about them, cause people wants to know everything about them and compare their lives to the ones of those famous people: if they go through lows, "common" people may feel better about themselves, or see famous as more "normal"; in the best case we just can get inspired by famous people (maybe they made a dream come true and so we hope to be able to do the same somehow). It's very tough cause it's not just about love, but they get also hated and envied far more easily and by far more people than "common" people: again it's about statistics.

The thing to keep in mind here imo is: it's not about quantity, but quality. One can be loved by the whole world but it doesn't mean everyone will remember them forever (and also, it depends on how and why they will: it's not always for something positive or good). Focus on you and your own personal relationships, on making them good enough so that even if just one person will care about and remember you, it will be more than enough cause it will be for the right reason. And that's what matters in the end (imo, ofc).

Life these days is easily influenced by fake lives we see online through social medias: all is buildt up so that it can look amazing (think photographs and AI as well). Many people (not just influencers) try to avoid sharing the "bad" part but only focus on the good and so the idea that everything must be perfect to be good and there's no way one can go through lows in life is something that is playing with the mind of many, making them think their lives are just terrible because they cannot make it good or make enough money (what is enough even? Everything costs more and more, so the fear of running out of money may make people fear living in poverty and need to make more money: no matter if they aren't happy as long as they're safe -it's about the root chakra yk-. For example esp. in the Southern area of my country, not having a secure job is unsafe for many elders, they may push their children to work in State's offices even if they don't want to, so that they will be sure they'll get paid all the months). All this is just adding a stress that is totally unnecessary: as you're noticing, not feeling supported in our choices by those in an "authority spot" (be it family or state letting us down more or less figuratively) is not going to help us find happiness or even wealth (what one can consider it made of). And seeing other making it (famous people for instance), may make us envious of them. Resentful even.

I don't think there's someone living the perfect life, we all go through bad stuff, it's just a matter of how we decide to deal with it and how much we share. Many pretend it's not real and try to forget about it by focusing on whatever else, and even on other people (=famous people) but it doesn't work in the end: fake positivity or avoiding negativity never solved any problem. But this is where famous people come in: seeing good/positive posts and being pushed to believe that something good can be (as it will), or even just being comforted by someone we admire can be of help for those going through a bad moment. On the other side, by showing the best side of stuff, some influencers (eg.) may try to convince us to interact with them also to know more about them or to see if their life are really better and how we can be like them... but they mostly do that to gain something. We're still talking about a job (social media in particular, but remember every famous person also generally gains from their appearances and image): followers and interactions of any type with an account, help them reach certain numbers in the algorythm of that specific social media, get viral or become famous/known enough so that they can start collaborations and gain more. And live (they try to make money as well as anyone else: ofc it depends what idea we have of how they make money and how much we know of it). This too has lows ofc, as everything, but we may not always know about them unless the person wants to share about it.

What I mean is: yes society has f-up rules and ideas, it's pretty much corrupted, but it's not famous people the real problem imo. Maybe "common" people just find in them a way to escape their reality (be it for the best or the worst, to send love or hate; maybe they just project, find comfort, avoidance... whatever other need they have unmet), as I was saying. Maybe they just find online (reels/tiktok in particular, fast and entertaining stuff for a life that goes fast and people's decreasing attention span caused by generally feeling low and not being able to keep up with that pace and ending up alone/left out ig) the entertainment they need to unwind and that they cannot find in their lives: they need to look outside, to not think about themselves. I think that until we look at what goes on outside instead of inside (whether it's to find validation or support or whatever else we need and were never given), there's not much that we can change in our lives. I am not demonzing famous people by any means (nor juding "common" people's behaviours): it's part of their job to be there and act as a trigger (at times) for others, but that's not always a pleasant job in the end: what I mean is, maybe we don't have to blame them for what is going on as their lives have pros but also many many cons we need to consider, understand and respect. In their place many people may not be able to deal with the stress and all and give up easily (don't wanna talk about the many famous people giving in to various addictions because of this).

But if you feel like because of society you need to act in a certain way to be accepted and you need to accept crumbs in your relationships, then that's wrong imo. You are free, don't let society cage you into unreasonable rules. You can make your own rules: you may feel alone at first, but you're not going to be forever. There are other people like you. You deserve much more than crumbs and you deserve to at least try to live the life you dream of living. Try to stop for a moment and realize what is this confusion you're experiencing really about. What do you see in the way famous people are treated and what you make it mean of you in comparison (despite I generally don't suggest to compare with others for this but ...yeah)? Do you feel not enough? Do you feel rejected? Underappreciated? Not seen? Idk... Do you really know what you want for yourself and how to get it? If not, start from the basic, see what you really want and need, and work to obtain it. Whatever goes on around you.

Not sure if I said all I wanted to say but I guess I touched the main points at least... Take care<3