#i hope he found peace
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I am once again sobbing over Fathom
#he did nothing wrong#he didnt deserve that#he loved darkstalker til the very end#him and indigo#dont get me started#he was too scarced of himself#i hope he found peace#fathom wof#wings of fire#darkstalker legends#indigo wof
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yall are so detached from reality and humanity omg
#people lost a loved one in a very tragic manner and all you care about is forming a correct statement like????? get a fucking grip and shut#the fuck up#like who do you think you are 😭#anyway#i hope he found peace#🙏🏻
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still thinking abt this pigeon i saw earlier today who got wet in the rain and wasn’t happy about it
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I remember being youngish, maybe preteen age, definitely before I realized I was a lesbian and my Mimi telling me a story about a family member (a cousin I think?) who was gay.
He liked to get drunk and go out and hook up with men. They ended up finding his body later. He had died of alcohol poisoning. I don't remember many of the details, just that she was using this as an example of why being gay is a self inflicted punishment likely to make you wind up dead.
She shook her head sadly as she was telling me about this. "If only he had looked to God instead."
It felt like stones in my stomach and I didn't know why.
"He just wanted somebody to love him," she had said.
He just wanted somebody to love him.
#she only ever mentioned him the one time but i think of him a lot#i hope he found peace#this was in georgia probably around the 80s mind you#i think about how much has changed since then and how much hasn't#so much is different but so much is still the same#my heart aches for every gay person who died just wanting to be loved by someone
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he was my north, my south, my east and west my working week and my sunday rest my midnight, my noon, my talk, my song i thought love would last forever: i was wrong
-w.h. auden
#liam payne#liampayneedit#rememberingliampayne#my posts#making this was actually really cathartic and helpful for me#going back through all those old vids trying to figure out what i wanted to gif#it was very sad but very happy and light at the same time#i've never been good with words but liam i'm going to be thinking about you for the rest of my life#i don't know if i believe in an afterlife but i hope there is one and i hope liam's found the peace he never could in life
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DAY 7: i miss my wife bonbon
#codacheetah#isat#loop isat#twohat spoilers#isat act 6 spoilers#SLIDING IN WITH 14 MINUTES TO THE CLOCK YEA BABY#this is like the dollar store version of what i had in my head but in my defense i was out all day. woopsiedoodle#its my personal postcanon headcanon that sif goes on like a several month 'i miss my dead wife' arc about loop bc he thinks they evaporated#into the either infinity war style after their fight. so theyre rlly sad and emo n shit about it but theyre like well. i hope loop is happy#at least. i hope they moved on and found peace :)#meanwhile loop does not know what moving on is they are clawing onto mortality with every last sap of their strength#always approximately 4 seconds from deciding to track down the party#but theyre scared so they spend all their time fuckin playing with birds and scaring kids or whatever#until one day siffrin's like stars i know they probably cant hear me but i miss them. and like does the handsign morosely#and then after several seconds loop picks up like ....hi stardust!!! wow you really didnt miss me that much huh!!!#siffrin voice: YOU'RE NOT FUCKING DEAD?!#anyways what heinous crime did the running one commit. leave your answers in the comments below#also. happy one week of this fucking guy!!!
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Small detour of what I usually post, but I absolutely wish (other) clown the best of luck during these confusing and almost hopeless times- nobody knows how to deal with such amount of attention in such short amount of time- a blessing and a curse to behold
#Seeing their posts absolutely shattered me#I may never be able to relate to how he’s going through rn but at least I can relate to the fear of living in absolute fear#the fear of unable to be yourself in your own home with creative and personal freedom#The fear of being terrified that the thing that gives you the most innocent happiness will be heavily demonized and threatened#The fear of getting caught doing something you love and being yourself with your found identity#The fear of destruction#I relate heavily to this and to feel you are going to be caught doing anything that isn’t a crime hurts#I wish him safety and love during these stressful days#He’s brought so much joy to my life that I must keep private irl too#Whatever he decides for the fandom I will fully support it#I will still continue posting of course unless he wishes otherwise#If he sees this (which I doubt) hey other clown lmao- you are loved and not alone#It may be scary but you are not alone- you will never be alone#There will always be people out there who love you and there will always be those who are not even worth giving time of day#The internet is both a blessing and a cruel cruel unforgiving place#I hope it doesn’t deter you from doing what you love and hold dear#I hope you have anyone you can be with online or in irl that can give you the comfort you need#You deserve peace and security#Do what you feel is best#Welcome home
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my thoughts on this hxh ABCD mess
Being a Togashi fan is such a roller-coaster of emotions. I think I went through all the stages of grief in only one day.
Half of me believes he's trolling.
To be honest, it's better to just take it with a light heart. Togashi is known for joking around about himself, his health and his own story. (I wasn't in the fandom at that moment, but I wonder how everyone reacted when he said everyone was going to die). I consider ending D to be so uncharacteristically him for so many reasons I could talk for hours about it. I find it ironic how he gave a stereotypical-shonen-like ending when he talked several times (even in this interview) about how he likes to surprise himself (and his readers) when he writes. Some other times he explained he likes to play with these shonen stereotypes and just do something different. I mean, he's been doing it since the beginning of his career.
And I'll be honest, ending D sounds like a mockery of shounen.
(And I feel a bit dumb taking this so seriously if he's joking.)
(Though, this also may be the case of "the boy who cried wolf" and he's actually saying the truth this time.)
The other half of me thinks he's being honest.
If he is actually giving us a back-up ending, I find it incredibly sad. Not only because of his health, but also because he felt pressured enough to give us an ending, no matter its form and no matter if it's an ending he doesn't even consider anymore. He shouldn't have been on that position.
It is important to take into account that this is not an ending he wants or even considers anymore, it is an ending we can take if he's not able to finish HunterXHunter. We need to realize there's a lot of circumstances we don't know about or may not be considering for him to give us this ending as an option at that moment. And what type of ending too.
I seriously want for him to be able to finish Hunter X Hunter the way he truly wants, not worrying about anything else. He's thinking about three plausible scenarios that may see the light of day or not. And no matter what he ends up choosing, he should choose whatever he wants. It's his story, no ours. And it may even be his last story (I know it's sad, I want him to keep on writing forever, but it's true). Honestly, a part of me wants him to choose the A scenario because that's where seems to be less drama, but actually I want him to choose the C scenario. Even if that ending is Gon married to a lizard with beautiful lizard-babies in the Dark Continent. And that's because that ending is what he would actually want to do with the story.
(I really am curious about it, though. I know I wouldn't be able to guess even in a million years, but I'm still curious. And I so want to read the whole interview and see the whole episode, since there were more questions about other things.)
For the shippers
I know this feels like a punch in the gut or something even worst. I felt it too. And it's totally valid to feel like we do and not agreeing with ending D. Even as a non-shipper because what do you mean, Gon did what?
Everyone who follows me knows I'm a proud Killugon and Leopika shipper. And I will keep on being one even if Hunter X Hunter transforms into Boruto and I have to see Grandpa Gon (the more I say it, the more it sounds like a joke).
Honestly, I always considered the gay ships were never going to be explicitly canon.(Kishimoto traumatized me). Not because of lack of material, but because there's a whole context and a lot of external circumstances we sometimes forget about (and Kishimoto traumatized me). There was a reason why Togashi couldn't make his queer manga in the 90s, which, I'm sorry, I don't consider it to be that long ago. And there is a reason why he can't explicitly say that characters like Pouf or Hisoka are gay (despite being totally obvious and them being villains).
I still find it admirable how Togashi included so many queer elements in his stories and got away with it. And he's a mangaka that does shonen. And not just any shonen, a battle manga in Shonen Jump. (He included a trans man in Level E and made him transition. The way Togashi explains some things about this character may be a bit problematic, but Togashi still did this). And those queer elements are still there and are still as canon as when he wrote it the first time. Pouf is as gay as he is dramatic. And Ging and Pariston still have that sexual tension (and I'm 100% sure they fucked or they are going to fuck in the near future or both). And Killua is still the queerest boy I've seen in the longest time.
Sometimes, I think there's a possibility of Killugon being canon. But only because of Togashi's history and tastes. He may feel a bit rebellious and just go with it, he's so unpredictable that I'm always expecting anything and everything from him (I mean, he did what he did with Hisoka and Illumi and so many other things). However, he's an introvert, I'm not sure if he actually wants the attention he would get if he actually goes with it. And that is something we should also respect. (I do think the most plausible option is Killugon to be as ambiguous as they are now.)
In relation to ending D, I don't think we should worry that much. At the end of the day, it is an ending he doesn't consider anymore. (At least we can sleep well knowing that the ending he wants to do doesn't have to do with Grandpa Gon). What's important is what he writes and does in the manga. That is what speaks louder than anything.
Though, I do think it's going to be a pain in the ass interacting with other fans. I'm not looking forward to it. (At least they are going to stop saying that Kurapika will die, I hope!). What I'm looking forward to is the new Killugon content in the fandom.
My personal take
Gon =/= Ging. I could say a lot about this, since one of the things I love the most about Hunter X Hunter is what he did with these two and Gon's arc, but I think this is clear enough.
So!
After saying all of this, I think the only thing we should consider as canon is the manga. If he doesn't write it, it didn't happen.
If he's saying the truth, he may be thinking about how to finish Hunter X Hunter sooner or later. Even though so many fans say that they want an ending, I feel like we are not ready. Not even for Gon marrying a lizard and having beautiful lizard-babies in the Dark Continent.
I hope I was coherent enough. I have no answers, only thoughts and thoughts! I feel like we can only speculate and ending D is so confusing because how did we even get there?
I may be going through all the stages of grief again tomorrow, but I wanted to share my thoughts (at least partially). I may erase it if I feel too uncomfortable, but yeah!
Conclusion: Let's just take it with a light heart and wait to see what happens! (I know it's hard).
#i hope this post doesnt grow old badly lmao#togashi is the only one who actually knows what he wants to do by the end of the day#everything can happen#i find it sadly hilarious how i was traumatized by kishimoto found peace with togashi's work and then savage option D appears lmao#hxh#togashi#hunter x hunter#hunterxhunter#hxh manga#yoshihiro togashi#killugon#justxtalking#btw my mom read ending D and didnt like it either lmao#the dudebros can take ending d if they want it I'll just have my leopika wedding with killugon enganged ending
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was feeling good and then i remembered altans last words were centered around finally getting his vengeance
#he makes me so#ARRSKGJSAGRAJHR#anyways#yes he deserved his vengeance#but i hope he found peace in the afterlife#altan trengsin#the poppy war
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august 6, 2007
My friend Sherry passed away on August 1, 2007, just a few days before I was to come visit her in the hospital. Never put off a visit to see an old friend.
I will not photograph our grief. I will not intrude on weeping faces. I will simply focus on the flowers, on our feet, on the dead grass, brown and ungentle in the afternoon drought.
#flickr#2007#flowers#wreath#funeral#rest in peace#memorial#found photography#old web#webcore#search term: mourning#i know i dont normally add text from the original upload but this affected me#my boyfriend is at the time of writing this in the hospital for something serious and he will probably be there when this posts#i just hope it doesnt end for him as it did for sherry
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it's not sinking in that today might be the last day in my house and town for many months to come
#like how do i even feel#on one hand im excited because like now that i finally agreed to dads stupid whims he technically will have to give in to things#ive been wanting since FOREVER like going to the gym#plus it's impossible to eat junk food when he's there he won't even let me kacchi maggi because maida hai bimar ho jayegi#and aadhe se zyada din toh pyaaz ye sab nahi kha sakte so it rules out any outside food#which is so good because like i just found out im pre diabetic lol#like borderline sugar like ab kuch nahi kiya toh seedha type 2 diabetes#so i need to eat healthy or ill literally die#i mean eventually but whatever being diagnosed with this in my 20s would kill me#also simply the fear of living with him is so much that i HAVE to study#and i want to now it's high time#but yeah want doesn't really work for me#i read a quote somewhere that 'goals' don't mean anything because winners and losers have the same goals#and i was like WOAH. like the person who gets an all india rank had the same goal as me: to pass the exam with good marks#but they succeeded and i didn't so it's isn't our goals that differentiate us#which ik is obvious but like still idk put things in perspective#anyway yeah that way my life MIGHT be fixed#but there's also living ALONE with my sociopathic FATHER who has more mood swings than me on pms#and being cut off frm the rest of civilisation and yk developed roads and buildings and ice cream shops#i guess it is mostly food ig :( which is good like the most junk food i can eat there is a burger from a nearby stall and that's pretty#much it they literally do not even have havmor or anything in walking distance forget scoop wali ice cream#but i like my bed and i like my ceiling with the stars and i like looking out of my window and knowing that the first ever crush of my life#lives right next to me and i like knowing that ill meet my bestfriend atleast once a month#i don't really love my mom or my brother tbh but idk maybe ill miss them it's weird ive never lived without them#i don't know i really hope that this is like a boot camp kota types experience rather than so much isolation that i sink deep into#depression. but then ive hit pretty shocking lows this year so hopefully i can handle it#my sister did say that when she lived alone with him for a month it was quite peaceful and okay because he usually gets more angry when mom#is around warna mostly he's fine#i don't know i don't know bhagwan ji please ab aur mushkil mat banana life bohot jhatke de chuke ho already ab pls#mujhe apni galtiyo ko sudharne ka mauka dena 🙏
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Cozy Aloth reading and enjoying some wine in the captain's cabin <3
Drawn on a whim on note taking app notability, colored on procreate! a little experiment in making digital look a little mixed media :D
#aloth corfiser#pillars of eternity#pillars of eternity deadfire#I miss him so bad it makes me look stupid#wanted to draw a cozy scene he deserves some peace and quiet and a good book and some good wine#been on a kick of wanting for stuff to look more traditional for some reason i just love the texture and feel#too broke rn to spend on real markers and stuff though#the note taking app thing was a fluke tho dahdjksh I found some good marker brushes lines for lining now I hope I can use soon!
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currently emotional over how rogue one-era cassian probably never thought that he personally had or could have or even deserved to have a future
#cassian andor#*ugly crying emoji*#yes he has hope but he's also devoted himself to the fight and at that point I honestly don't think he expects to survive it#he fights for others. for people he will never even know. excuse me while I weep#and then Jyn comes along and hits him completely unprepared#because if there was time and of there was the opportunity I think he would have started imagining a future for himself#and found his will to live again maybe#cuz look at that man and tell me he keeps going for anything other than the fight and the goal#he will sacrifice himself and he is more at peace with that than with surviving. with an *after*.#and the most heartbreaking thing is I think Jyn at the beginning of the movie is much the same#a part of her has given up and is surviving solely out of spite
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cant think about liebgott’s dad saying, “you messed my joey up,” to that vet that invited joe to an e reunion, and lieb never attending a single one. otherwise i will spiral……….
#thinking about that photo of him in holland i think it was where hes kinda just grinning at the camera#m1 slung across his back. him looking so small and skinny#him being described as filled with aggression#hope it worked out for you in the end lieb…………..i hope u found some peace…………..
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Thinking about if Anakin fully killed Frei. Like... they "fight" and he runs her through with his lightsaber but instead of being immediately horrified by his actions he moves on to the younglings and the rest of the story goes on as canon.
Except!!! Darth is constantly haunted by her Force Ghost.
Everything he does is constantly critiqued and gets snarky remarks.
Just imagining him force choking some empire goon or officer and he hears Frei behind him go, "That'll show 'em. Killing off your staff one by one. Great job Ani."
And he just drops them with an annoyed sigh then turns to glare at her.
And after the og trilogy? When he's redeemed and they're reunited as force ghosts. Hnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn. The first thing he does is kiss her cause even as a sith he couldn't help but miss and love her. And they spend eternity together in the afterlife.
#i like my new timeline better but i also love the idea of haunting dead naming darth vader#he's trying to give an important order or speech and she keeps interrupting and distracting him#Leia shows up in a new hope and Frei's like 'Wow! Isn't she JUST like Padme? you know? the senator you had an affair with?'#'man. i guess all it really takes is one time... well at least something good came out of it.'#'I'm still not impressed it happened though.'#And Vader is desperately trying not to tell her to shut up because no one knows she's there#except in the kenobi sho Obi-wan definitely saw her bitcjing at him#that's the first peace vader had was right after that first fight she went and hung around obi wan for a bit#and when he found her with him for the second fight he gets really jealous and is like conflicted about the whole thing#like 'nooooo! don't haunt anyone else! you're MY ghost gf!'#death by anyone's hand but his would never taste as sweet#prisma rambles#prisma self ships
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i found plur last night under my desk where he settled onto my lap for awhile before we both went to sleep on my bed. he passed away this evening and i just hope he finds his own little hiding spots to nap in the kitty afterlife. rest in peace love unity and respect my most handsomest man
#he looked like he was peavefully comfy in his little nook when i found him. it took a sec for me to realize he wasnt moving#he was sick and we all knew it but it doesnt make it easier#i miss his yowling and incessant need to creepily stare at you#but i also hope hes happy and comfy and at peace. i know hes had a rough few months
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