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#i hope everyone is doing well and are healthy (:
Note
Can you pretty please write something like the Nanami college au again?? It was so funnn <33 love your work!
Shibari Master
Tags: dom!nanami x fem!reader, college au, nsfw, mdni, bdsm relationship, fluff, mutual pining, slight angst, happy ending don't worry.
Synopsis: Nanami is the stoic, silent, strong type. He excels in each class he’s put in. He’s never one to cause trouble, but… there have been whispers around the university. “I hear he likes to tie girls up for fun…” “My friend says he’s a freak in bed and left marks all over her.” “Someone told me he has ropes in his dorm.” It seems like Kento has a secret.
An: You guys really seem to love the college au Nanami 😭 I don’t mind. I actually really love writing him. This isn't necessarily a sequel or part two, but I hope this is something that you were hoping for. This is another long one. Strap in.
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You were the type of person who really kept to themselves while in college. So many people told you that you would meet some lifelong friends and studying in university, but you didn’t really see the point. Everyone went their separate ways after college. There was no point in befriending anyone in there.
Well, Shoko’s the exception. She’s like a sickness that you just can’t fully get rid of. No matter how closed off you were, she just continued to tease and banter with you. You two often found yourselves sitting next to each other in class or in the dining hall.
Sure, you two had fun being absolute haters together. “Oh my god, yn. Look at what he’s wearing.” Shoko would whisper into your ear, referring to the guy in the hentai face hoodie that no man who gets pussy wears.
Shoko had friends. She was close with all sorts of people: the athletes, the quiet ones, anime nerds, trouble makers, everyone. She didn’t discriminate, which means she had a lot of gossip on everyone.
You were sat next to her in the dining hall as you leisurely munched on an apple. She was yapping about some people in drama club that got caught fucking in the auditorium, “a total orgy” was how she described it.
Your mind was elsewhere though. While you weren’t keen on making friends, you weren’t immune to crushes though. A man like Nanami was right up your alley. He was quiet, respectful, the hottest man you’ve ever seen and smart.
“Girl.” Shoko nudges your arm and furrows her eyebrows at you when you’re not giving her all your attention. “You are not ogling over Kento fucking Nanami right now, are you?” Goddamn her sense of social cues. You could get nothing over her.
“And if I am?” You ask, taking another bite from your apple before turning to face her with an almost challenging look.
“My little yn is finally coming out of her shell.” Shoko grinned up at you. She could never resist picking on you a little bit. “No, but seriously, I’ve heard some crazy things about him.”
“Like what?” You immediately ask with a puzzled expression. What kind of crazy things would Nanami get up to? He seems so strait laced. It’s hard to imagine him doing anything ‘crazy’.
“I heard he likes to tie up girls for fun.”
Oh shit.
Now, as a person who had unrestricted internet access as a kid and a recovering tumblr user, you knew what BDSM was. In fact, you were pretty well acquainted with the concept. Even as it was now more widely accepted after the movie Fifty Shades of Grey (which in your opinion, missed the mark on portraying a healthy BDSM relationship), BDSM still felt a little taboo. It was like a forbidden fruit to you, one that you thought about often.
“So? A man has a kink. Be so for real right now.” You respond as you glance back over at Nanami.
“No babes, it’s not just a kink. Like… I’ve heard that he didn’t touch them like that..”
“Oh…” You almost want to fucking pout upon hearing that.
“Oh yn, you freak.” Shoko laughs as she pokes your cheek. “You totally want him to tie you up.”
“I mean…” You give her a look which makes her laugh even harder.
“Stop.” She says while still laughing. “I heard it something called like shibari…”
*** *** ***
That night instead of researching for your upcoming term paper, you spent all night on the Shibari Reddit and reading up on different forums.
It was nearly three in the morning. Your fingers are scrolling on some sort of shibari blog, and you can’t help but feel almost jealous of these people. It was like an art and BDSM activity all in one. You wanted to do that.
You wanted Nanami to do that to you.
Your eyes are nearly half-lidded when you come across another blog. It was so late. You knew you should probably get some rest, but one more blog couldn’t hurt.
The knots were beautiful and intricate on the model’s skin. There was one photo where large veiny hands were cupping her cheeks as she was tied up. Damn. The master had nice hands.
You learned quickly that the ones who were being tied were called models, and the one who were doing the tying were called masters.
The next photo on the blog was even more erotic than the last. Another model tied up in pretty pink rope, and a tie was being held around her neck.
You’ve seen that tie before. It was unmistakable.
The only man who wears a yellow and black tie like that was Kento Nanami.
Heart pounding, you check the caption:
Knots done by KN
This was too much to be a coincidence, right?
You keep scrolling until you come across a text post instead of a picture.
Looking for models in the Kyoto area. College shibari master looking to teach.
Holy fuck. This had to be fate, right? You felt your stomach swirling with butterflies as you hovered over the message button. What are the odds that this isn’t Nanami?
Yn: Hi.. I saw where you were looking for models to teach.. I was wondering if I could get some info on that.. Sorry to bother you so late!!
Gods. You sounded like an absolute dork. You wanted to delete the message, but it was likely that the master already received it. What had you done?
*** *** ***
You could barely sleep last night, plagued with dreams of ropes and Nanami using his tie on your wrists or neck. You were lucky that you didn’t have a morning class today.
Drowsily sitting up, you reluctantly checked your phone. It was nearly noon since you had stayed up so late. Scrolling through your notifications, your heart nearly stopped when you saw a message from that blog last night.
KN: No need to apologize. Yes, I am looking to teach a new model. What kind of information would you like?
Ohmygod. Ohmygod. Ohmygod.
Yn: Thanks for getting back to me!! I was kinda wondering if you charge anything for a session..?
KN: No, I don’t charge anything. I go through a pretty extensive recruiting process with my models though.
Yn: What might that include..?
KN: First, I like to get to know them on a deeper level than just first name basis. I want to know what kind of understanding they have about shibari.
KN: Then, I request that the model provides me with some kind of proof that they’re in the right medical condition for shibari. It is a demanding art that does include some physical aspects. I want to know what your body can handle.
KN: After that, I try out practice knots on the model, making sure they’re absolutely comfortable every step of the way. I think of this as a trial run.
KN: Granted all goes well, I then draft up a beneficial agreement between the both of us.
Oh. This was so much more than you could’ve bargained for. You didn’t even expect for him to respond back, but he was talking about an agreement??
If this was Nanami, then you could feel yourself falling even more hopelessly for him. If this wasn’t Nanami, you were definitely reluctant to move forward.
Yn: An agreement..?
KN: Don’t let that word discourage you. I’m a man of rules and principles, that’s all. We’ll talk more if we get there.
If.
That word felt like a bee sting right in the gut. As delusional as it may sound, it felt like he was already discounting you without completely being rude.
You didn’t even know what you were thinking when you messaged this person on the internet. You weren’t even sure it was Nanami. The idea of shibari was appealing, tempting even, but you really didn’t want to just experience it with any type of person.
A message on your phone grabs your attention.
KN: May I take you out to coffee sometime, yn?
This was probably wrong, but it felt right. Something was pulling you to keep texting him.
Yn: I don’t normally meet strangers from the internet so quickly.
KN: Oh? We’re strangers? I would’ve at least considered us to be acquaintances.
Your eyes widen as you stare down at your phone. This might actually be Kento Nanami messaging you, and he offered to take you out to coffee. You were now aware of how hard your heart was pounding in your chest.
Yn: Is this Kento Nanami..?
KN: It is. Was it not obvious?
Yn: It definitely was. I think I was just nervous and didn’t want to get my hopes up.
KN: Get your hopes up? You were hoping for it to be me?
Yn: Is it weird if I was..?
KN: I would consider it to be cute rather than weird.
KN: About that coffee..?
*** *** ***
A pile of discarded clothes lay on your bed as you were trying on another outfit while Shoko watched you. You had hated everything you have tried on so far.
“What’s so great about Nanami anyways?” Shoko asks as she opens up your window and lights up a cigarette. You’ve begged her to stop smoking, but she adamantly refuses, stating “at least I’ll die happy”.
“He’s just… kind of mysterious, is he not?” You ask as you’re looking at yourself in a full length mirror. You were to meet him in about thirty minutes at a local coffee shop near the campus.
Your body is being hugged by mocha brown shirt and a brown plaid pleated skirt.
“Jesus, yn. Is he getting to know you or your ass?” Shoko jokes as she grins up at you with her cigarette tucked between her lips.
“Both if I’m lucky.” You wink at your friend who rolls her eyes playfully at you.
“And you’re one hundred percent sure you’re not into girls? What does Nanami have that I don’t?” Shoko’s no stranger to flirting with you. It was just her personality type. Though, if you were into girls, Shoko would definitely be your type.
“I’m sorry. When did you grow a dick?”
“You’re saying you wouldn’t suck my strap?” She playfully pouts and gives you a look that almost makes your heart skip a beat.
“For you, Sho? I just might.” You continue to banter with her as you grab your purse.
“You better go before I steal Nanami’s woman.” She looks away from you as she snuffs her cigarette against the outside brick.
“I’m not his woman.” You retort as you head towards the door.
“Yeah, yeah, I better be your maid of honor. I wanna wear a tux though.”
You laugh at your friend’s boldness and decide to hurry down to the coffee shop, not wanting to keep Nanami waiting. He seems like the type of guy to value punctuality.
As you arrive to the local shop, you marvel at how nice the shop looks. The walls are painted with a soft eggshell white, and it has accents of dark oak wood and black decorations. It’s decorated high and low with botanical plants
Nanami was sitting in the corner of the shop in a more private area of the shop. He seemed to already be sipping on a coffee of sorts. You feel your heart start to pound at the sight of him. He was wearing a black button-up shirt that hugged his muscular arms so deliciously thanks to his harness that he was also wearing. His beige slacks also fit his frame nicely. You might dare say, Nanami has a nice ass.
His hazel eyes lifted up from a book he was reading, and his lips so subtly quirked up into a smile as soon as he caught a glance of you. He stood up from his seat and pulled your chair out for you like the gentleman he was.
“You look lovely.” His deep voice made your head spin for a moment. Sure, you had heard him during class, but he sounded much more relaxed and less robotic.
“As do you.” You respond before realizing your blunder. “I mean, you look handsome-“ The words quickly fall from your mouth.
“Oh? I'm not lovely?" He asks, an edge a playfulness in his tone. You didn't know he had the capabilities for that.
"I- No- I meant. You are?"
"Relax. I don't bite." He takes a small sip from his coffee before lazily looking back up at you. "Unless you ask me to."
Heat floods your face, and you immediately cross your legs together, trying not to show your obvious likeness to that idea. "Good to know." You finally manage to say after a moment.
He gives you a kind, warm smile in response. "Do you want to order a coffee? Then, we can get to know each other more?" He asks in a reassuring tone. His presence is nerve racking, but he also provides almost a sense of comfort. He has things under control, and you just have to follow along.
"Sure." You agree, and he walks with you up to the counter to order a drink.
"Can I get a vanilla latte please?" You ask, and the barista types in your order before rambling off your total. You reach into your purse to retrieve your credit card, but Nanami subtly nudges you while handing the barista his card.
"I could've gotten that..." You quietly state, feeling guilty that he paid for you. Nanami shakes his head with a small scoff of amusement.
"I invited you out, yn. I wouldn't expect for someone to pay for something that I invited them out to." Nanami assures you before the barista hands you your latte. You make the mental note to get him back at a later date.
The both of you settle back in at your table.
"So, how did you find my blog?" He asks with a small, curious smile on his face.
"Well..." You start off, but your voice trails off. Not fancying the idea of telling him that you and Shoko had gossiped about him, you decide to bend the truth just a bit. "I've always been intrigued by the idea of BDSM, and I just kinda fell down a rabbit hole of shibari, which led me to your page."
"Oh really? What intrigued you the most about BDSM?" He cocks an eyebrow up at you, his smile never fading.
"Trust, mostly." You respond sheepishly.
Nanami couldn't have came up with a better answer himself. He shifted his position a bit, and he leaned into the table ever so slightly. "Trust... Is that what excites you?"
You feel your heart flutter in your chest as you gaze into his hazel eyes. "Yeah... being able to follow in someone's lead because I trust they're sense of judgment. That's what excites me."
"A woman after my own heart." He jokes kindly as he leans back into his seat. "So, no experiences with BDSM or shibari though? Just intrigue?"
"Yeah... just intrigue." You agree as you tug your bottom lip between your teeth.
"What all do you know about shibari?"
"Hm, I know the roles of master and model... I know there are different color ropes. It seems like a very emotional act..." He nods at what you're saying.
"It can be very emotional for both the model and the master. It's a huge test of vulnerability, trust, submission, and leadership. You know, Yn, if I ever have the honor of tying you, I will be holding your life in my hands."
You feel the heat rush to your face and between your legs from his words. There was something about giving him that level of control over you that drove you mad on the inside. You almost wanted to tell him that you wanted to skip to the trial run, but you knew that his process was what was best.
"I.. I know that... The honor...?" You softly question, causing for him to gently laugh.
"Yes, the honor. Never ever let a dom or master make you feel like your submission is anything less than a privilege. You don't owe me or anyone any part of you."
Jesus Christ. How was this man even real?
"Uh.. Noted... So, how did you find shibari..?" You hate how spacey you get when you're feeling nervous, but you don't want to fuck up and say the wrong thing.
"I always took pride in photography, so when I found photos of shibari, I knew that was something I wanted to capture. The leadership role was not always something I've been good at." He explains as he gaze drifts down towards his coffee. You're silently grateful that the coffee shop isn't too busy. They're also playing soft lo-fi tunes that drown out yours and Nanami's conversation.
"How long have you been a master?" You curiously ask, feeling a small pit in your stomach as you remember he has had other models.
"Well, I've been tying knots on people since I turned eighteen, but I'd say I really became a master at it when I turned twenty-one. That's also when I really started to take it more seriously. I use to just tie up whoever volunteered just so I could learn the knots on an actual human body. That got me into some shitty situations, so once I gained enough experience, I decided to do this little recruitment process."
"Is this just a hobby or..?"
"I see it as a lifestyle, one that I don't bother hiding."
"Then, what are you in Uni for?" You ask as you tilt your head to the side a bit, feeling confused as to why he was in college if he seemed to only have a passion in something he was already a master at.
He gives you another amused laugh. "Business." He replies.
"Why would you be in the business major?"
"I run my own business, darling. The pictures of shibari I take aren't free, with the exception of the ones I post to my blog to market it. I also photograph other things as well."
"Ohh..." You drawl as you feel a bit embarrassed for not considering that aspect. "So... how many models do you have...?" You reluctantly ask, unable to squash the growing pit in your stomach.
A small smile curls on Nanami's face as he looks at you with an unreadable expression. He seems to completely think through his response before he opens his mouth.
"I wouldn't necessarily say I have any models of my own." He answers, but that really only fills you with more questions instead of reassurance.
"So... that means...?" You ask, not daring to look up from your coffee mug. It was foolish to want a sense of monogamy from him at this early of a stage. You knew it was, but you still couldn't get behind the idea of him having multiple models.
"It means that..." The door to the cafe jingles, and Nanami's face immediately shifts to a more serious one. It's an expression that you're use to because it's the one he uses around campus. He looks unamused and almost annoyed.
"Nanamiiin!!!" A white-haired male drawled as he approached your table. You recognized him as another student from uni.
"Gojo." Kento greets in a flat tone as he eyes the male. Gojo seems to not take any offense to Nanami's tone, and he plops down on the bench seat right next to him.
"Are you on a date, Nanami?" Gojo teases as he eyes you then looks back at the blonde with a grin.
"What are you doing here, Gojo? You don't even like coffee." He says, completely ignoring the other's question.
"This cafe has a really good hot chocolate, you know. Also, am I not allowed to run into my best friend while he's in public with a pretty girl?" Gojo cuts his bright blue eyes towards you, beckoning for you to speak up.
"Oh, are you two friends?" You ask, unable to bear Gojo's omniscient stare.
"The closest." Gojo replies before draping his arm around Nanami's shoulder. Your date rolls his eyes and shrugs Gojo's arm off of him.
"Too close in my opinion." Nanami grumbles lowly.
"So cruel, Nanamin." Gojo pouts over at his friend who doesn't budge in the slightest. "Are you at least going to introduce me to your date?"
"No, leave."
"Nanamiiiin~!"
"My name's Yn." You interject their little spat as you hold out your hand towards Gojo's.
"Yn, what a pretty name for an even prettier girl." He says as he takes your hand and brings your palm up to his lips.
Before either of you could react, a strong hand grabs onto Gojo's wrist, preventing him from kissing your hand. "If you intend on keeping your hand and your dignity, I'd leave now."
Your eyes slightly widen as you watch the covert struggle between the two men. You can’t help but be hyper aware of your heart pounding in your chest. Was he being territorial… over you?
Satrou looks back over at Nanami with a smug grin before he releases your hand. He then drags Nanami’s hand up to his mouth and presses a small, polite kiss to his hand as if to piss the blonde off more. “You should bring her to the pool party next weekend, Nanamin.” He suggests with a grin.
Satoru then stands from his seat. “It was nice meeting you, yn. I hope to see you again soon.” He then promptly leaves the cafe - without even buying a hot chocolate.
Nanami takes a few moments to repress his anger back down. He takes a deep breath before speaking up. “I’m so sorry about him. He doesn’t understand boundaries at all. He didn’t make you feel uncomfortable, did he?”
“No, no, it’s alright! I’m okay.” You assure him with a reassuring smile.
He nods and returns a relieved smile before checking his watch and softly sighing. “I have to go… I would like to see you again.”
You can’t help the smile that creeps up on your face as you nod your head. “I’d like that too..”
“Do you have a free day before next weekend?” He asks before drinking the rest of his coffee. You had only just now noticed that he was drinking straight black coffee.
“Oh, uh, Wednesday afternoons are free.” You respond, feeling a flutter in your chest from the promise of seeing him again.
“Wednesday afternoon it is. How do you feel about coming to my dorm?”
His dorm? The one that’s rumored that he keeps ropes in? You can already feel your excitement bubbling up inside you.
“Your.. uh.. roommate will be there?” You ask, silently kicking yourself for how you stumbled over your words.
“Hm? No, no, I don’t have a roommate.” He assures with a small smile. “I paid the extra money. Considered it to be an investment towards my lifestyle since practicing shibari would be hard to do with a roommate.”
The new information only makes you feel more nervous and excited. For one, it was an extra thousand dollars to be roomed alone. That was no small “investment”. For two, this meant you were going to be alone with him in his room - with ropes.
“Oh.. uh, yeah, I’m okay with that.” You finally respond after a moment.
“Perfect.” He stands from his seat and looks down at you again. You have to crane your neck upward to look at his face. It’s your first time seeing him up close like this. He was tall, and his muscles and veins made you want to salivate all over the table. “See you then.” He mumbles before affectionately patting your head and leaving the cafe.
*** *** ***
The wait until Wednesday dragged on and on. You were so antsy to finally see Nanami again. You had filled your time gushing to a very skeptical Shoko and stalking his blog. He hadn’t posted anything new yet, which you decided to be a good thing. Maybe he didn’t really have any other models?
You politely knocked on his dorm door, triple checking that you went to the right one. He had texted you which one was his this morning.
The door open a moment later, and you were greeted to the sight of a cozy looking Nanami. He wasn’t in his normal attire - just a t-shirt that fit him way too tightly and a pair of grey sweatpants. Slut.
“Hi.” You greeted awkwardly, not knowing what to say.
“Hello.” He let out a puff of air in amusement to your candidness. “Come in.” He says as he moves out of your way. “Make yourself at home, please. I figured we could watch a movie today unless you wanted to do something else.”
Yeah, Nanami - do you. You silently thought to yourself.
“A movie sounds good.” You casually reply as you stroll into his dorm room. It was the average size of a dorm room, but since he didn’t have a roommate, it felt a lot larger. He had a couch where the other bed would go.
Taking in more detail, it was incredibly clean yet cozy. Your eyes drifted around his plain looking room. You don’t really know what you expected, but you assumed there would be some sort of hint to shibari.
That’s when your eyes find a coat hanger, but it wasn’t hanging up coats. Bundles of differently colored ropes hung from the hooks. He had every color of the rainbow and even some multi-colored ropes as well.
Biting your lip slightly, you wondered how the ropes would feel against your skin - if they’d be soft or rough. Would he be gentle or rough?
“I see you found my collection.” His voice slightly startles you, causing for you to flinch. A small chuckle of amusement escapes him from your skittish behavior.
“Oh- uh, yeah, sorry..” You apologize, not wanting for him to think you’re weird.
“Don’t be. I assumed you’d be curious. Want to touch one?” He offers as his hand slowly finds the small of your back, and he casually guides you over to the coat hanger in the corner of the room.
“I’m allowed?” You sheepishly ask.
“I wouldn’t have offered if you weren’t.” He calmly laughs as his hand grazes across a white rope. “This is called jute rope. It’s made for comfort and aesthetics.”
You nod your head and carefully reach out to brush your hand against the rope as if it was made of glass. The rope really was silky smooth. You almost wish your clothes were made out of the same material.
“I didn’t expect it to be so soft.” You muse quietly, allowing your hand to continue petting the rope.
“It’s made with comfort of models in mind. It won’t leave any rope burns or anything like that on their skin.” He explains, and his hand moves to a different rope. “This one on the other hand is hemp rope. It’s rougher, so it can sit more snugly against the skin. It’s great for tight knots and suspension.”
You follow his lead, carefully touching the next black hemp rope. It was rougher than the jute rope. “Suspension?” You quietly ask.
“That’s for experienced models and masters. It’s a whole different breed of shibari - one that requires a huge foundation of trust and understanding of each other’s bodies.” Nanami explains as he watches your facial expressions.
“Oh.. have you ever suspended someone before..?” You can’t help your curiosity when it comes to his experience level.
“Once, but it was sheerly for practice.” He calmly answers before moving his hand over to the soft pink rope next to it. You immediately recognize that rope from the pictures on his blog. “This one is made of cotton. It’s extremely soft and lightweight, great for beginners models.”
You reluctantly reach out and barely touch the pink one. It was incredibly soft, but you can’t help but think about the lucky girl posing in his pictures and how pretty she looked in his hands.
“You recognize this one, don’t you?” He asks, immediately noticing your withdrawal.
“Yeah.” You respond as you look away from him and the ropes. You knew you were being dramatic, but some part of you couldn’t help it.
It’s obvious to you that the girls he’s tied up in the past spread those rumors about him, telling everyone what he likes to do in his free time. You painted a narrative in your head that all the other girls he’s tied up in the past aren’t really into shibari. They probably just wanted to get in his pants. Okay, maybe that was an unfair assumption.
“Hey.” Nanami speaks up, and his hand gently cups your cheek, making you look up at him. “We can pick out your own rope, okay? I want you to be comfortable, and if using ropes that have been on other models makes you uncomfortable, I’ll buy a whole set just for you.”
It’s a heartfelt gesture - proving that he has your best interest in mind. It didn’t completely put an end to your bitter jealousy, but it helped.
“I don’t want you to spend that kind of money just because of my downfall.”
"Downfall-? No, darling, it's not a downfall, and please, there is nothing else in the world I'd rather buy than new shibari ropes. As soon as you can provide a doctor's note to me, I'd love to take you and pick out ropes for you together." Nanami's hand stays firm on your cheek, not allowing for you to look away from him. His voice sounds raw - he's being serious.
Something about him planning for the future makes you relax a bit. He's planning this stuff already as if you're spot in his lifestyle is already guaranteed.
Swallowing harshly, you slowly nod your head. "If it's something you'd like to do as well, I think it would help me feel a bit more comfortable."
"It is. I want this to be as fun for you as it will be for me." His voice drops an octave lower as his eyes rest upon you, practically drinking in the sight of you. Slowly dipping his head towards your ear and neck, he whispers, "You're going to look so pretty tied up. I'm excited to see what color you'll pick."
Oh.
You immediately press your thighs together, trying to subtly hide your arousal from his words. Gods, you were so easy. He didn't even have to do much to get you all worked up.
The two of you lounge on his couch, watching a movie that he has playing on his laptop. He has his arm comfortably placed around the back of the couch. Since you were watching on a laptop, you had to sit rather close to him.
The lingering scent of his cologne in the air made you feel feral, and you could feel his body heat radiating from his body. The movie was just a blur at this point as you were silently wishing he'd just wrap his arm around your shoulders and pull you closer.
You sneakily catch a glimpse of his face, and you notice his eyes are closed. His breathing is even and deep. He fell asleep next to you.
What an absolute cutie.
Carefully, you reach out to the coffee table and pause the movie. With no more background noise, you can hear the soft and subtle snores escaping from his mouth.
Deciding that it would be too weird for you to stay in his space while he's unconscious, you carefully try to stand. but two strong arms loop around your waist and pull you back down - right into his lap.
"Stay." He murmurs quietly. His voice was still breathy from sleep. "Please?"
You gaze up at him, and his eyes were still closed. He had his face nuzzled into your hair while holding onto you like you were a damn teddy bear. Refusal wasn't an option. Even in his sleep, Nanami was stronger than you.
"I'll stay." You whisper back to him, knowing good and well that he was fast asleep. Getting cozy in his lap, you allowed your eyes to slip close as well.
*** *** ***
He apologized profusely to you for falling asleep once you two woke up from your cozy nap. You reassured him that it was okay. You were grateful that he felt comfortable enough to fall asleep next to you, and it seemed like you both needed that nap.
In order to make it up to you, Nanami invited you to that pool party that Satoru mentioned at the cafe. If you had the guts to meet Satoru and still stick around, you may as well meet the rest of his friends.
Now it's Friday, the day before the pool party. You hadn't really heard from Nanami since he invited you, but he was active on his blog. That sick feeling clouded in your stomach upon seeing another model tied up in the white rope you were just touching on Wednesday.
Jealousy's a bitch.
Deciding that you really couldn't be upset, you weren't even technically one of his models. It was also very possible that Nanami was posting older pictures that he had taken before you had even messaged him.
You couldn't stand to sit on the sidelines for much longer. If you wanted to become one of his models, you needed to go down to the clinic and get a physical to prove to Nanami that you were in good health.
Surprisingly, it was easy to lie to the nurse and say that you need a physical to join the volleyball team. She didn't suspect a thing as she had you sit down on one of the cots and fill out a clipboard.
Since this was a university clinic, privacy was not it's strong suit. You could clearly see anyone who walked in through the doors, just as they could see you.
Answering all of the questions on the clipboard with 'no', you perk your head up as your hear voices speaking to the nurse.
Your heart fell into your stomach immediately as you take in the sight of Nanami guiding a girl into the clinic. What were the odds?
Feeling your heart pounding in your chest, you try to calm yourself. This could be just a funny coincidence.
"What seems to be going on today?" The nurse asks while looking between the girl and Nanami.
"She just needs to be checked out is all." Nanami's calm voice felt like a bullet. He was here, helping another girl get a physical, so she could be a model too.
All while he had been practically radio silent to you for the past couple of days.
Glancing over, his eyes caught yours. A smile immediately curled on his lips until he saw you crumpling up your paper from your clipboard.
"Nevermind. I'm good." You tell the nurse and Nanami as you chunk the piece of paper into the trash.
"Hey wait- yn-" Nanami tries as he tries to reach out to you, but you were already gone.
It's funny how he was suddenly flooding your phone.
KN: Yn, please, allow me to explain.
KN: I know you're upset with me. Let's just talk this out.
KN: Tell me what to do to make it better.
KN: Yn, please.
KN: Please. I'm sorry. It wasn't how it appeared.
The messages went on for the rest of the day. You ignored each one of them. You had placed him on some fucking pedestal just because he seemed quiet and 'not like other guys'. BLEH. He was exactly like other guys. He could just tie boy scout knots and say pretty assuring words. This is exactly the reason why you didn't care to make friends. Something will always come around and burst your bubble.
You finally gained enough courage to tell Shoko what happened the next day. She promptly came over to try to console you.
"Baby, he could've actually had an explanation." She oddly advocates for Nanami, even though you distinctly remember her asking what was so good about him when you first brought him up.
"No, he just wanted a way in, so he could lie and make me feel better." You say, telling yourself that fact as much as you were telling her.
"Are you still going to go to that pool party? I'll be there." She says as she rubs your hair gently, allowing the strands to flow through her fingers. "You can at least show him what he's missing."
The thought of going out anywhere sounded like torture and seeing him sounded even worse, but the thought of getting your mind off him did sound appealing. Plus, you did have a really cute bathing suit...
"You'll be there..?" You ask timidly.
"Of course." She assures you with a smile.
*** *** ***
Walking into the huge frat house, your arm is linked with Shoko's. She was wearing a pretty black one-piece bathing suit that she's wearing a black lace shawl to cover her body.
You were wearing a lilac bikini with a bathing skirt that tied around your hips.
It was dark out, but the back patio of the house was lit up by a cozy fire and string lights that wrapped around in trees and around the patio area. The massive underground pool was also lit up by pool lights that were underwater.
It wasn't necessarily crowded per say since it was so massive, but there were probably twenty or so people hanging around the pool and outdoor bar.
"Shokoooo!" A familiar white-haired guy shouted from inside the pool. The he was leaned back, so the water lapped at his chest and abs. He raised up a beer. "aaanndd... Nanami's girl. You made it."
Your face involuntarily grimaced from being referred to as 'Nanami's girl'. Had you not seen pictures of his new models and him taking that girl to get a physical, you probably would've blushed from the nickname.
"She's my girl tonight. Thank you." Shoko bantered with a small grin, and she gave your arm a reassuring squeeze.
Speaking of Nanami, you didn't see him anywhere. Did he decide not to come?
A tall brunette male with long hair and gauges stood beside Gojo in the pool, and he leaned over to whisper in his ear. Satoru's face shifted, and he nodded. "That's right." He said a bit too loudly before the brunette shushed him.
"Come on. Let's get in." Shoko urges you as she slips off her shawl and gets an over exaggerated whistle from Satoru. You then hear a "ow!". It was clear the brunette had elbowed him.
You really don't feel ready to be alone, so you follow her lead and slip the sheer lilac skirt that covered your hips, and you throw it on one of the nearby patio chairs.
Stepping into the water, it becomes clear to you that the pool is heated.
"How does the school even afford this?" You quietly mutter.
"The school?" The brunette laughs. "The school didn't afford this."
"This isn't a frat house..?" You quietly ask as you step deeper and deeper into the water.
"The Gojo-frat house." Satoru replies with a cheeky grin.
"It's called daddy's money." The brunette adds with his own grin.
"It's called Gojo money, Suguru." The white-haired male jabs the other in the side.
The patio door slides open behind you, and you look over your shoulder to see Nanami walking out with another tall brunette male, but this one had shorter hair. He also had tired eyes and a stoic face.
Your heart aches a bit as you share a glance with Nanami. He was wearing swimming trunks and a grey t-shirt that covered his chest. He looked at you with a hopeful glance, as he obviously looked like he wanted to say something.
"Hiromi, haven't seen you here in a while." Suguru comments as he takes a drink from a red solo cup.
"Yeah, law school is pretty unforgiving. I don't recommend." Hiromi says with a small smile as he sits down on the concrete next to the pool. He allows his legs to dangle inside the pool next to you. "I'm sorry. I don't recognize you from around." He says as his gaze falls upon you.
"Oh, uhm, I'm Yn. I don't normally come to these things." You awkwardly greet yourself as you look up at him. Maybe he'd be a good distraction.
"I'm Hiromi Higuruma. It's nice to meet you." He smiles as he sticks out his hand. You graciously take it, and he gives your hand a small squeeze.
Your eyes meet and for a moment. You're almost able to forget about Nanami. That is, until you see the blonde strip off his shirt out of your peripheral vision. You give him the satisfaction of glancing over at him.
Fuck him and his entirely too nice body.
He looked like an Olympian. His shoulders were nice and broad. His chest and abs were perfectly defined too. He slimmed up a bit towards the waist area, and his swim trunks were ever so slightly giving you a peek at his v-line.
"Show off." Hiromi laughs as Nanami sits on the other end of the pool. He then props his hands up on the concrete and allows his entire body to slip into the water.
You're almost completely mesmerized by him, until Hiromi speaks up.
"So, you don't come around these things too much?" He asks as he looks down at you while your lower half is submerged in water.
"No, I don't. I don't really enjoy the party scene." You reply sheepishly as you look back up at Hiromi.
"Me neither." He laughs leaning down towards you slightly. "I don't know why they continue to invite me to these things."
You share a small laugh with him, but a cold chill makes your body shiver. You can feel a pair of eyes boring holes into you. Risking a glance over in Nanami's direction, you see him staring straight into Higuruma's very soul.
Was he actually jealous?
"Do you want a tour?" Hiromi asks as he seems to not even notice Nanami's death glare.
"Uhhh..." You drawl as you glance back over at Shoko. She was currently chatting up a pretty girl at the other end of the pool. A small exhale of amusement leaves your nose. So much for being her girl tonight. "Sure. I'd like that." You respond to Hiromi. He carefully takes your hand and helps you out of the pool.
You two explore the massive frat house, and Hiromi tells you that he use to go to your school and live in the frat house with Satoru, Suguru, and a few other names you don't recognize. However, he left once he was accepted into law school.
"You know... no one would notice if we were gone for just a little while." Hiromi murmurs into your ear as he crowds you against a wall. "I could show you my old bedroom. I doubt Gojo had the decency to even fix it up after I left."
"Oh, I..."
"Hiromi." A deep voice calls from the other side of the hallway, startling you from responding. You glance over and see Nanami with a towel thrown over his bare shoulder.
"Kento." Hiromi responds with a half-smirk. "Have you met Yn?"
"Very much so. Satoru's calling for you outside." Nanami responds flatly as he stares Hiromi down. "I think it'd be wise of you to go see what he wants."
Hiromi lets out a slight sigh, and he moves back away from you and the wall. "Fine." He responds before brushing his hand against your cheek and walking away.
Left alone with Nanami, you have no where to go and hide. You can't avoid his questions anymore.
Stalking forward slowly, you feel your heart start to race with each step.
"You've been ignoring my texts..."
"I have." You respond dryly as you keep your eyes away from him.
The sound of his footsteps hitting the ground draw closer.
"That girl at the clinic wasn't my model. I don't have any models." His voice was lower than normal, hanging onto each word.
"The pictures on the blog? You going silent for a while?" You ask as you take a step back from him.
"I run a business of selling pictures of models practicing shibari as pieces of artwork. It's all completely consensual, usually girls come to me looking to make some money since I give them forty-five percent of all the money earned from the pictures. They're not my models though. I rarely ever see the same girls twice considering the amount of money I pay them." He explains as his footsteps gradually grow closer.
You take another step back, trying to comprehend what he was saying, and your back presses against the wall. Dead end.
"The girl at the clinic?"
"She passed out in front of me completely by sheer coincidence. I was just doing her a favor and not leaving her unconscious in the middle of a college campus."
He takes another step towards you until you can feel his body heat radiating from him. You're eye-level with his pectoral muscles as you can't bring yourself to look him in the eye right now.
"Yn." He says your name in such a demanding tone. You slowly drag your eyes upward and give him a guilty look. Your jealousy had gotten the better of you, and it almost cost you Nanami. You can feel your heartbeat in your throat as he carefully reaches up and cups your cheek. "I've wanted it to be you ever since I first saw you around campus."
"Wanted what to be me..?" You softly whisper as his giant hand encompasses your cheek and jaw. His thumb drags gentle circles on your skin, massaging your face.
"My model. My muse. Please, forgive me for not being immediately forthcoming as to what I do for a living. I'll stop it immediately if you ask me too. I'll do whatever you want.. just please.."
Your hands reach up and gather his jaw before you can even think twice, and you pull him downward to you. He immediately gets the memo and dips his head down, pressing his lips against yours firmly.
You respond immediately with a small whimper as he presses your back against the wall. The sounds of lips smacking together filled the hallway completely as Nanami drinks down every little noise you make.
His hands are gently groping at your thighs, massaging the soft, pillowy flesh beneath his fingers, and he lets out a quiet groan. Your hands trail upwards to his blonde hair, and your rake your fingers through his undercut.
Your bodies are pressed together, barely hidden by the fabric that was your bathing suits. Nanami trails his kisses down your jaw and neck, gently sucking and nipping at the skin. His hands firmly hold onto your thighs, and he lifts your feet off the ground, holding you up against the wall.
“I can’t get enough of you.” His voice mumbles between kisses.
“Nanami…” You softly gasp as he sucks a love bite into the crook of your neck.
“I thought I was going to kill him.” He goes on as he gently bites and kisses down your shoulder. You immediately know he’s talking about Hiromi.
“I couldn’t stand the way he looked at you.” Another bite. “I want to be the only one who looks at you like that.” Bite.
You’re pitifully trying to grind your hips up against Nanami’s growing bulge, desperate for friction. “Say you’re mine, and I’ll give you what you want.”
You feel your heart flutter at his offer. Nanami’s dirty secret wasn’t that he’s a shibari master. He would tell that to anyone proudly. His dirty secret is he’s as jealous and territorial as you.
“I’m yours.” Your voice is breathy as you lean your head back against the wall. “I’m yours. Please, Nanami.”
Oh, that whiny tone will be the death of him.
“That’s what I thought.” He lowly rumbled into your ear before he started to move his hips, practically dry humping you in the hallway. Anyone could walk in and see you two.
You were too enthralled by the feeling of his tip bumping and rubbing against your core. You could feel every outline thanks to both of you being in swimwear.
“Fuck.” He quietly growls as his hands start to move your body as well, practically using you as a toy for pleasure.
He leans over towards your shoulder, and he catches the tie of your bikini string between his teeth. All while he’s grinding against you, he unties one of your bikini strings using only his teeth.
The wet fabric immediately slides down, allowing him a peak at your breasts. He lifts you up a bit higher so he can kiss around your chest. Unfortunately for him, your top is still blocking what he’s aiming for.
“Take it off.” He demanded lowly, getting impatient.
Your hands immediately reach behind your back, and you pull a string that immediately frees your chest. Your top ends up on the ground.
“Good girl.” He rewards as he leans his head down and kisses all around the soft flesh of your breast. His tongue darts out, gently lapping at your nipple, causing you to shiver. A smile curls onto his lips. He loves your reactions.
“Nanami~” You impatiently whine again.
“So needy.” He clicks his tongue. “Tell me what you want, darling.”
“Please.. no I-“ You fumble over your words, feeling to shy that you want him to fuck you into next week.
“Use your words. Tell me.” He’s unrelenting.
“I want.. want you to fuckmeplease.” You quickly say, mushing all your words together.
“You can do better than that, dear. Try again.” It’s no wonder he’s a fucking dom.
“Please fuck me.” You finally whine out.
“Yeah? You want me to fuck you, right here?” He asks as he adjusts his arms. He cradles the back of your thighs with one arm as his other is busy pushing down his swimming trunks just enough.
“Yes.. please..”
“Right where any of our friends could come and see us?” He questions once more as he hooks his fingers into your bikini bottoms, and he pulls them to the side.
“Yes..” You whine as you glance down. Your skin runs cold as you see his length.
“So impatient.” He muses as he gently starts to rub the small bundle of nerves in tight circles, causing your body to shake lightly in anticipation. Your legs hook around his waist, and your arms stay around his shoulders.
“Hope you can be quiet, darling.” He taunts as he aligns himself with your hot wet entrance. He hums as he pushes in at a torturously slow pace. It feels like he’s splitting you in half, quite literally impaling you with his cock as he lowers you down onto it.
Your nails dig into his shoulders as you feel each inch of him push into you. Harsh jagged pants and small moans escape from you involuntarily.
“Or don’t. I wouldn’t mind them knowing how good I can make you feel.”
“F-fuck too big.. ngh~ I.. I can’t.”
“Shh. You can take it.” He hums as he presses soft kisses to your neck. “You’re my— hah.. good girl, aren’t you?”
“Y-yes!” You stifle a cry as your body hopelessly clings to him. He’s only halfway in, and you’re already so delirious.
“So warm and… ngh tight for me, hm?” He praises as he continues shoving himself inside of you. His self control is slowly withering away as your cunt grips him like a vice.
“Therree we go..” He purrs as he’s finally buried himself to the hilt. “Biiig stretch.”
“Sh-shut.. up.” You whimper out of embarrassment as you lean your head down into his shoulder.
“What did you just say?”
“N-noth-“
His hips pull back and snap inward forcefully, causing your back to thump against the wall. “Ah!”
“Say it again.” He demands.
“Shut up..” Your voice is barely a whisper, and Nanami laughs at you. He laughs.
“Oh darling.” He murmurs into your ear quietly. “I’d suggest you check your tone before you speak to me like that again.” He rams his cock into you once more, causing a small whisper-cry to fall from your mouth. “Or else everyone in this goddamn house will find out how much you love being fucked by me.” His hips start to move at a brutal pacing. Your back is flat against the wall as you’re physically knocked back with each thrust.
“I-I… ah~ … ‘m sorry.”
“I know you are.” He murmurs quietly into your ear. “Ngh.. fuck’s sake.. takin’ me so well.” He praises as his hands are dragging you in sync up and down his cock, impaling you harder.
Your walls squeeze around him so deliciously, and your pretty sounds falling from your mouth. Nanami doesn’t feel in control for the first time. Sure, he’s the dominant one in this situation, but his hips are moving completely on their own accord, rutting into you fervently. His cock can’t get enough of your warm spongy walls wrapping around him.
Glancing down, he can see a ring of white and clear slick gathering at the base of his cock. “Such a mess.” He mumbles as starts rolling his hips faster into you.
His thick tip gently kissed your cervix with each roll of the hips. Your body was trembling in his arms. “Na..fuck.. nanami~” You moan as your nails are digging into his shoulder blades, giving him scratched as trophies.
“That’s right, darling. Say my name.”
“Nanami~”
“Louder. Want .. mnnph.. want our friends to hear you.” His hips are rocking back and forth deliciously, rutting you into the wall like an untamed animal. His body was coated in a thin sheen of sweat, and his normally kept blonde hair was messily falling onto his forehead.
“Nanami!” You shout, obeying his demand.
“Good fucking girl.” He growls as he bounces your body up and down along his length.
“Sh-shit.. Nanami, I wanna… ah~ wan’ to cum please.” You ask for permission as soon as you feel the coiling heat in your stomach. Your body is so close.
“Go ahead, baby. Let me feel you.” He pants as he feels his orgasm nearing as well.
“Oh, fuck-“ You whimper as your body spasms on him. Your walls clenching around him impossibly tighter.
“Thaaat’s it.” He purrs as he pumps himself in and out of you gently, fucking you through your orgasm. “That’s a good girl, finishing on my cock like that. So pretty when you cum.”
Your poor fucked out cunt is so sensitive as he’s continually forcing his cock in and out between your soaked folds. Grunts and growls escape his mouth as his pacing is slower but purposeful.
“You ready for my- mmnph~ cum, baby? Where you want it, huh?” He asks as his legs are starting to tremble with each thrust. It’s taking every last inch of self control he has not to finish right then.
“I-inside.. please, don’t pull out.” You whine as your legs tighten around him more.
“Want it inside your pretty cunt? You wanna be filled with my cum? You sure you can handle that?”
“Yes, please.. fuck~ please, Nanami.”
“Come here.” A deep growl rumbles from his throat as he pushes into you as deep as your pussy will allow, and his cock twitches with each rope of cum his blows into you. You’re able to count at least six. “Ohhh~ fuck-!” He curses as his entire body stays tense for a few more moments.
Deep breaths fill the silence.
Your body is gently trembling in his arms as you’re both coming down from your highs. He presses a small kiss to your cheek. “Do you think you can stand..?”
“N-no..” You reply sheepishly.
“Okay darling, I’m gonna sit you down on the floor. I’ll be right back, okay? Just get your top on and wait for me.” He reassures before hissing as he pulls out of you. His seed immediately trickles down your thighs.
He gently sits your bottom down onto the ground, and he makes sure you’re okay before he pulls his swim trunks back up and walks out towards the back patio.
Your body will barely cooperate with you as you tie the lilac bikini top back to your chest. Your hands keep shaking and fucking up the knot.
From the patio, you hear loud cheers and claps coming from Satoru.
“Na-na-mi!” He chants to embarrass his friend. A few others in the pool chant along with him, loving the look of annoyance and underlying pride on his face.
Kento simply rolls his eyes with a small smile and grabs his clothes and your sheer skirt from the back patio. “Go for round two. Don’t be a pussy!” Satoru shouts obscenely, and Nanami flips him off as he walks back into the house with you.
He puts his shirt on you to cover you up and carries you back to his dorm bridal style.
“Sleep at mine tonight. We’ll get you some clothes tomorrow and go to the store.” He offers as he closes his door with his hip.
“The store?” You ask curiously, wondering why you two would need to go to the store. “I’m on birth control.” You inform, thinking he’s talking about getting a plan B.
“Well, that’s good to know, but I was talking about getting your ropes.” He responds with a soft smile as he gently sits you down on the couch. He then digs some clothes for you two to wear out of his dresser.
You had almost forgotten all about shibari after he had fucked you like that. Your eyes immediately glanced over towards his coat rack, and your eyebrows furrow as you realize it’s empty.
“What happened to your other ropes?” You quietly ask.
“Hm? I gave them to a beginner shibari master.” He says casually as he pulls his swimming trunks off. You politely try to look away, which earns a laugh out of him. “It’s not like you haven’t seen me before.” He muses.
“Not like this-!” You shout with a pout as your hands cover your eyes. “Why did you give them away?” You ask quietly.
Nanami pulls on some dry pajama pants, and he carefully walks up to you while you still have your eyes covered. His thumb gently brushes against your lips, causing you to flinch slightly.
“I don’t want you to feel reminded by other people when you’re in here with me. This is our space. We’ll have our own ropes just for me to tie you up with and no one else. You’re the only person for me, and I don’t want you to think that since I have other ropes, it means I’m tying up other people.” He quietly explains as he takes your hands away from your eyes.
“But your business..?” You quietly ask as your eyebrows knit together. The thought was so considerate and sweet, but you didn’t want to be the reason for his loss of income.
“Is not as important as you are. Besides, I photograph other things.”
“And… if you take pictures of me..?”
“My eyes only.” He grins before pressing a kiss into your cheek.
BONUS SCENE.
“How’s that, darling?” Nanami asks as he tightens the knot against your wrists. “You remember the safe word?”
“Feels good.” You softly hum as you allow for your eyes to close. “Yes, I remember the safe word.” The safe word was Malaysia. Nanami admires your expression. You were a complete natural at this. He started off small, only tying your wrists behind your back as you were on his knees.
The red jute rope looked so pretty as it pressed against your flesh. He took out his camera and snapped a picture of your hands bound together. Then a picture of your relaxed face.
“So beautiful.” He praises quietly.
Your eyes flutter open, looking up at him through your lashes. His breath hitches in his throat as he takes one more picture.
“Something feels wrong.” You murmur quietly, and Nanami’s face shifts to one of concern.
“What is it, baby? Too tight?” He asks as he immediately goes to look at your wrists, making sure that he didn’t accidentally bind you too tightly.
“No.. my mouth feels empty.”
Kento’s movement stops as he looks down at you. You give a coy smile back up at him.
“Oh, I see. Too empty?” He says as he leans back up, standing in front of you to where you’re eye-level with his belt.
“Uh huh..”
“You want me to fix that, baby?”
“Please.”
His hand buries into the hair on the top of your head, and he grabs onto it with one hand. His other hand unbuckled his belt and frees his already hard cock from the constraints of clothes.
Your mouth waters as he holds your head just far enough way to where you can see his cock but not touch it. Your wrists immediately pull against the restraints.
“Oh? Is this what you want, hm?” He asks as he slowly pulls your face forward.
“Y-yes..” You stutter, immediately feeling neediness pool between your thighs as you see a bead of precum gather on his reddening tip.
“Open up for me.”
Your mouth is immediately open as you look up at him.
“Ohh, good girl.” He purrs as he thrusts his hips forward, filling your mouth with cock.
You’ve never been happier (or fuller).
BONUS-BONUS SCENE!!
“This plan is absurd.” Hiromi gripes as he pinches the bridge of his nose.
“Look, they’re hopeless. What kind of friends would we be if we didn’t help them out?” Satoru asks with a grin.
“Okay, run it by me one more time.” Hiromi says with a small sigh. He should be studying for the bar right now, but his friends needed him.
“Shoko is going to bring Yn to the pool party. You try to get her alone, and I’ll send Nanami in there to get you to come outside. He’ll see her with you and be so overcome with jealousy that he’ll have to spill his feelings!” Satoru explains with big hand gestures.
“You meddle in everyone’s love lives too much.” Suguru shakes his head with a fond smile.
“Shoko started it! She was the one who went telling Yn that Nanami tied up girls, knowing damn well that would intrigue her.” Satoru deflects, causing Shoko to scoff.
“I was doing him a favor! He was clearly lovesick over her, and when she mentioned liking him too, I just gave her a little breadcrumb to make her more interested.” Shoko adamantly defended herself. “You were the one who followed them to the cafe after I told you not to!”
“I had to see it for myself if he was actually going to take her on a date and bring her around!”
“All of you should be charged with stalking and harassment.” Hiromi remarks as he shakes his head. “Remind me to never tell you guys if I have a crush or not.”
*** *** ***
Tags: @theuniversesnepobaby @lemonlimecrystal-blog @getoisinnocent @jjknanamin
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payidaresque · 1 day
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Do you believe in any feelings from Sauron for Galadriel? It seems that he is only chasing through the woods because she has rings and not because he wants her back :( I'm sorry to be negative, but this season is a disappointment and there is little hope for episode 8
Hey anon! First of, i completely understand your pov, it's normal that you feel this way since we didn't really get much of Haladriel interactions this season, and it might be extremely dissapointing, especially after everything we got in s1
HOWEVER. I feel a bit different
I might need to put this under the cut cause oh boy, do i have lots to talk about
I really do think Sauron has feelings for Galadriel. And it's not just because i want to believe that, but also because of what the creators are showing us this season?
I made several posts talking about Sauron's and Galadriel's feelings towards each other, and i really do think it's executed the way it is for a reason. And i mean, even Amazon themselves admitted Sauron is obsessed with her (Galadriel, not the rings)
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And while i believe that Sauron wants the rings because he's power hungry (totally expected from the evil incarnate), I also believe his vision of the world is not ideal without Galadriel in it. He really meant what he said on that raft: she binds him to the light, and there is no darkess without light and vice versa
throughout the entire season we saw that Galadriel never left Sauron's mind for a second: starting with his creepy interactions with Mirdania, and ending with him creating an illusion where everything connects to Galadriel, and him being completely devoured by this moment of peace and quiet, when he could just dispose of it the second he didn't need it anymore (sounds awful, but pretty much like he did with Mirdania). The dialogues, the visuals. the metaphorims of it all — it screams "i miss the times when we were together, and i want her with me".
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I really do believe that Sauron. in his sick and twisted way, is trying to build a kingdom, where he would rule with his Queen — just like he promised her on that raft. And if she refuses again… well, then all of Middle-Earth will pay the consequences for that i'm afraid
Even those little details where Sauron gets annoyed by EVERYONE touching him, speaks a lot to me. He hates being touched by everyone and can't even hide his disgust when that happens. With everyone, but again, not Galadriel. Galadriel is the only being on this earth, for who's touch he practically craves, which was proven multiple times with Mirdania, on whom he basically projected his true desires (creepy af, but Sauron is not exactly... a healthy individual lmao)
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Though i really don't think Sauron wants to "posess" Galadriel. He is smart enough to know that you can't "posess" someone like Galadriel — her spirit is simply too strong for that, and he can never fully "have" her, he would need to break her for that to happen, and i don't think he's willing to do that, at least not now — he is too drawn to her light and doesn't want it destoyed
I mean, even if we look at their finale battle
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Galadriel is going all in and is determined to destroy him at the cost of her own life. Sauron? He's just defensive. He doesn't want to hurt her (at least in the beginning), although he could do that in a blink. He will probably just try to convince her to talk (as weird as it looks, given the circumstances lmao), but Galadriel will refuse to listen (totally understandable)
Now, going back to the "posessing" point i made, i don't think Sauron wants that. In my opinion, the main factor why Sauron wants Galadriel with him is because she was the first, mind you in eons, one who showed him that he can be loved, and she loved him. she loved him as her friend, Halbrand, and she was the first one to show him what genuine affection is like. Which is also why i think he will use his Halbrand for in the finale: it's not only to convince her, but it's also to sort of tell her "look, that man u met on the raft? I'm still that person, I can be that person if you're with me, because you're my light"
So for me, this season was actually entirely centered around Haladriel — not in the amount of scenes together no, but in the whole... leitmotif of it. idk if that makes sense
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bixels · 9 months
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While I do think anon was rude, I do think it's pretty shitty to set up all this stuff you were going to add the au and then just drop it. It's disappointing. Definitely unfollowing.
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Bye.
#ask me#anon#once AGAIN.#I am not dropping anything#the au is not getting cancelled. more than likely i'm gonna take a break from it until i find motivation again#But I've been drawing the AU for half a fucking year#In that time I've only drawn 5 things that aren't mlp related#I'm getting tired and my last few posts didn't do as well as I'd hoped#And I'm not about to burn myself out on mlp au art even if I really do love making it#I'm still gonna make comics. I have a bunch of ideas.#Tulli and I still wanna do the limited run merch shop#Discord is still coming. Sunset is still coming. Sombra is still coming. I have so many ideas#But I need to do something else for my own sake. Did you know I was supposed to get the background 6 designs done by now#But I didn't because I'm TIRED#I've been keeping myself on a schedule to keep content pumping despite travel and school and family and I'm tired#what i'm getting isn't matching what i'm giving and that's nobody's fault. i'm not frustrated at anyone. a slump was bound to happen#drawing the au was fun until it become my Thing. Because when your Thing––your identity––starts to faulter#it can really make you freak out#And that's not healthy for the project or for myself. I need to find the fun again and I'm sure I will#I'm really appreciative of everyone's support in my inbox and replies it really does mean a lot especially given that about 2/3 of my#followers followed for mlp. But if you're gonna react to me saying “i'm gonna cool down on mlp art and draw my own stuff” with “i'm#disappointed in you." then Leave! I think it's good you're unfollowing#you are not obligated to stick by my side! But don't act like I'm doing you a disservice by turning my attention elsewhere#I didn't promise anyone anything and I definitely didn't say I'm breaking any promises.
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angelnumber27 · 3 months
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violently forcing myself to have better days
#everyone’s different and this isn’t true for everybody of course:#but a lot of the time we have more control over things than we can see in a difficult moment#like for example#a negative thought is inevitable and not something you can just stop. however you CAN decide from there how you let it effect you#it’s way easier said than done but you genuinely can be like hey I’m going to have a good day today#I like to set my intentions for the day and not allow my trauma nightmares to dictate how my whole day goes#but in order to do that I have to consciously decide that I deserve better and then create that for myself#does this make sense?#do things you know you enjoy/ things that make you feel better. take care of yourself. create little healthy routines to do each day#even if it’s just for 5 or 10 minutes#you have to act to make a genuine positive change in your life and circumstances#tried to say this as well as I could but I struggle w articulating exactly what I mean#like my thoughts are too complex to translate into words#anyways though I just wanted to add this- this post is not to make anybody feel bad whatsoever.#if you struggle with certain disorders and such it genuinely might be close to impossible for you to actually be able to have that control#and that’s okay. it doesn’t make you any less of a person and it is not your fault that you experience those difficulties#I just wanted to remind people that it is possible to control certain aspects of your life and it is possible to snap yourself out of it#I know I need to remember this as often as I can#that’s why I shared it#I hope this makes sense I do not know if it does lmao#(the tags)#my thoughts are so jumbled up. idk what other word to use lmao
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osamusriceballs · 11 months
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The Accident - Part VI
Atsumu x fem Reader
Warnings: None
Words: ~ 1,1 k
About: The flashback ends- but what will you do next?
Part I II -> Next Part
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"You're not getting married."
Osamu's sharp remark did not have the intended effect. Both of you were still clinging to each other, acting all lovey-dovey.
"Samuu, you don't understand. She's my soulmate. I love her." Osamu's eyes almost popped out of their sockets while he kept watching how you two clung to each other and smiled like idiots, your hand on his cheek after he had said these words.
"You don't even know her. And stop touching her like that in public."
Atsumu's hands started wandering on your back, his fingertips teasing the bare skin on your back much to your delight - but to Osamu's horror.
"I don't mind - but who are you?" You turned towards him, and he paused for a second. You were beautiful, that much was certain. Shiny eyes, glossy lips, and a dress that looked like it had been made for you - but he quickly discarded every thought about your looks when he knew that he needed to stop this nonsense.
"I'm Osamu Miya. His brother."
"Oh." Your eyes widened as you took in his appearance, probably only then realizing how similar he looked to the man whose lap you were currently sitting on.
"Samu, we gotta go. The barkeeper told us that there's a priest next to this club."
"You're not getting married."
No matter how many times he repeated the sentence, it seemed like Atsumu was unable to understand.
xxxxxx
"And then you convinced me to get your car to drive us home. Wouldn't stop bickerin' about how it's expensive and designer and about how it costs more than Onigiri Miya will ever make. I'll definitely kick your ass for that."
A muscle under Osamu's eye twitches when he mentions the comment, and you have to hold back a snort at this. He's kind of cute when he's angry.
"And then?"
"You were gone. Found ya at the church, but it was too late. You idiots already signed the contract."
You slowly step back until your knees reach the bed, and you heavily sink down on it. It feels like he's telling you a story right out of a movie, not something that has happened just a few hours ago, the whole thing still too absurd and unreal.
"Can we redeem it?" You look at Osamu, like he's the only one that can save you now, and he somehow actually is. You still have hope that you can get out of this without negatively impacting the rest of your life.
"I've talked to our lawyer. It's a waterproof contract. Very surprising because the church was more than just a bit shady. You're both bound for a year until ya can file for divorce." His words feel like a death sentence, and you find yourself at a loss for words. You gulp at his words, blinking a few times to suppress your tears. You're an idiot—an idiot for getting in a situation like this.
It's silent.
You don't dare to look at either of them, your gaze only focused on the phone in your hands, and every passing second makes you feel even more uncomfortable, until you can't stand the silence anymore.
"I'll get going."
You stiffly get on your feet, your movements robotic and lifeless while you make an attempt to leave, but you're quick to get stopped by Atsumu before you can even make more than getting up. "Wait- I- I don't even have yer number!"
"Oh." You pause, standing there for a few moments while you watch Atsumu getting closer to you, until there is not much space left between the two of you when he stands right in front of you. "Hey- are you okay?" Concern laces his voice while he looks down at you, and you manage to nod with a forced smile. "Peachy."
Osamu snorts at your comment and shakes his head, a movement that you barely see in the corner of your eyes. He probably feels guilty for the whole situation too, the dark cicles under his eyes similar to Atsumu's, certainly because he tried to find a solution for this and did not sleep at all during the night. "People who say 'peachy' are anything but fine."
"Hey, look at me." Atsumu ignores his brother's comment and brings his hand to your cheek. You're startled but allow him to turn your face upwards until your eyes lock. "I'm not letting ya go when ya can't even walk properly. You'll eat something, then you'll take a nice hot shower and get in some clean clothes and then I'll bring ya home. That alright with you?" There is something about the way he softly states the words that sends a comforting wave of warmth through your body, and you find yourself nodding and trusting him.
"Hmm. Good girl. Now just eat the rest of the fries while Samu gets ya some clothes. Right, Samu?" Atsumu breaks the eye contact with you to look sharply at Osamu, who only sighs and nods. "I saw a souvenir shop at the lobby. Better than nothin'." You now look at Atsumu's side-profile, admiring his sharp jaw line, unable to do something else but wondering if there is even one bad angle on this perfect man, while Osamu leaves the room with another deep sigh.
"Shouldn't I have given him some money?" You take a deep breath and wipe your hands on your dress, noticing how clammy they got. Probably a side-effect of the nervousness.
Atsumu snorts and returns his gaze to you, an amused smile on his lips. "That serves him right. He always brags about how much he makes with his stupid restaurant." Atsumu looks so similar to Osamu when he rolls his eyes; it's almost comical. "Don't tell him I said that, but he really makes the best food ever. I'll take ya there and show you."
You hum approvingly, feeling somewhat a tingle run down your spine at the prospect of him taking you out for dinner but try to ignore it. "C'mon. Eat the rest of the fries. I saw how ya inhaled them. You can have mine too." He grins, something that makes him seem absolutely adorable, and you find yourself smiling back at him, a warm feeling running through your body.
"I'm not hungry anymore. I'll take a shower then?" You questioningly raise your brows, and he nods. "Yeah, of course. When Samu comes back, I'll put the clothes in front of the bathroom."
Thank you," you raise your hand as if to pat his shoulder, but you halt the movement just before reaching him. You shouldn't touch him. Technically, you don't even know him. His gaze flickers to your hand, and he appears to consider taking it. However, he quickly steps to the side, giving you some space to move to the bathroom.
Without looking back at him, you close the bathroom door, take a deep breath, and glance at the phone in your hand. You scroll until you find the picture of a bright-haired person—
and decide to finally make a call.
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her-canine-teeth · 6 months
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bad astrology by flower face
#yellowjackets#jackieshauna#ITS DONE OMG ITS FINISHED#what do I do now. with my life (ranking)#also ive decided i am gonna do literary analysis. on all of em#literally i have NO idea if anyone cares. well. i do bc I care and tbh that's enough to me#<- guys look im living so healthy#anyways this was a blast#hope somebody has at least discovered flower face trhu me bc its one of my fav artists#mitos incredible life#mine art tag#also im sorry the like long scenes 3 and 4 arent on beat :/ i love that song but it has so long instrumental stuff and idk what to do there#ALSO!! i had it all planned out like at least half in my docs (like always)#and then in the middle i was like 'omg what if I only show jackie-after-the-argument and shauna-after-jackies-dead'#(excluding the argument and the flashbacks (they used to hear us thru the floor))#which was. restricting. very much#also meaning was changed (originally wanted jackie to have the line 'idc if ure not made for me' but the only scene i could think of was th#ure hungry for and that was the next scene already so.)#anyways this was originally gonna be lottienat before i started with The Shark In Your Water#bc I thiught it fit them SO well. (still do) but now I like have to get away from the jackieshauna thought and then ill do the lottienat#probably#omg also I want everyone (who has read this far. whoever would do that) to know i was running on like 25 screen#recordings and 3 jackieshauna scene packs form yt#that's why. I dknt have that many clips alright im not using like 10 scenes over n over on purpose#gotta go but im gonna make a wrap post thingy once im back slay#no actually I get like average 7 notes (<- that's a lie Idk bc I didnt count) but im proud of myself this is amazing#ive wanted to do smth similiar alr#but it was some album by alec benjamin and a different thing for every song (like a poem‚ a painting or a play)#but I lost motivation this is the first thing that i actually pulled though all the way I think#jackieshauna: The Shark In Your Water
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nilovalentine · 1 year
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I'm voting amane guilty but some ppl voting her guilty are being so mean about it it almost makes me wanna switch to the inno side ngl
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bibleofficial · 1 month
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guess who had fucking pesto w their most DARLING NUT THAT THEYRE FUCKING ALLERGIC TO
#stream#‘i was like what the fuck is in this ?’ ‘this is the only thing in this ? it’s supposed to be normal pesto basil ?’ NOPE#ITS FUCKING CASHEWS AND PESTO#IM GOING TO KILL MYSELF#literally i was hitting my#just used the fucking epipen if i vomit i vomit but i would rather not#inhaler like is this why my throat is closing up ??? like NO ???? bc then i was sweating like ok … i see what’s happening#maybe i’ll just take like a few benadryl i’ll see if im allowed to do that#I FOUND 3 BLESS#so i’ve taken 3 benadryl + the epipen i should probably just take another allegra bc im only taking 120mg here#i’m determined to not vomit#it’s so fucking annoying#I HATE MY LIFEEEEEEEEEEEE#I WAS JUST TRYING TO BE HEALTHY FOR ONCE#I HATE EVERYONE WHO EATS CASHEWS WHY DO YALL PUT IT IN FUCKING EVERYTHING WHO ASKED FOR THIS#everyday i pray we get cricket protein like pls anyone just put crickets into thinks im BEGGING#unrelated but#i’m#strongly considering getting several boxes of crickets from the pet store then just releasing them here on my accom bc i hate them#so much#like i’m fully not even going to tell them abt the mouse that fucking broke into my cupboard like i saw it today she has shit EVERYWHERE &#am sayin good for her bc yall know damn well that i did not fucking vacuum those lentils or nothing up she deserves a snack bc i even saw#her lil tail on the side of my window earlier like she’s so damn cute i know ur there sweetheart ❤️❤️❤️❤️#i hope she never dies
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your tags on parenting make me super emotional <3 that's exactly the kind of parent I want to be one day
Thanks! I feel the same way honestly. I have a lot of opinions about parenting and I can't say that I will be the perfect parent because that doesn't exist. I can't even say that my hypothetical future kid/kids will be perfect because children don't grow in a vacuum. I can only control what I do and say and try to be the best version of myself and hope for the best.
#i often hear people say that involved parenting is too difficult to be realistic or that modeling behavior is too hard#and yeah. yeah it is. it is one of the most difficult things a person can do. but who the fuck has a kid thinking it'll be easy?#kids are hard work and commitment. they should never be something done on a whim. you should never half ass raising a kid#and not to say that people should be perfect all the time or that people shouldn't have 'me' time#its just that i genuinely don't understand people who shove their kid into as many activities as possible to get away from them#or put all their hopes and dreams and expectations on them. if it's so easy and attainable to live up to your expectations as a parent#then do it first. you want your kid to have straight A's? great. show me your report card at that age#im just... kids are just people. and they just want to hang out with their parents and receive love and attention#and anyway ive lost my point im just very passionate about this topic#very passionate#when im older and financially stable I want to foster teenagers i think. i want to be there for them and model healthy adult behavior#and help them make that transition. i want to be that person for them. because everyone needs help and love and family#and honestly? my parents fostered kids my entire life. THEY MODELED THAT BEHAVIOR#i understand that family is not a given. i understand that family is above all else forged. and that applies to everyone#not just found family or fostering. if you don't know your bio child then can you really call yourself family?#family is *forged* regardless of the context. and if it isn't? if you skip that step with your bio kids? well thats a major fucking issue#anyway nothing but respect for my parents who bought groceries for my foster sister when she was out of care. FOR MONTHS#nothing but respect for my parents who took me with them to give my foster sister their old stroller when she needed it#nothing but respect for my parents who take in my old foster brother every weekend to 'babysit' because they know he isnt in a loving house#nothing but respect for my parents who adopted my siblings without a word when they asked#honestly they are why i am who i am today. i was a kid with adhd and learning disabilities who hated school#and now I'm an honors student and getting my doctorate. because they did the academia with me#and im not saying they did my schoolwork. im saying that they assigned books to read over the summer and we would read them as a family#and we would discuss the literary concepts and themes together as a family. i love dissecting media! and thats because of my parents!#it was a family activity! same goes for science and art and music#and coding and history ect ect#anyway im going off on a tangent but basically what im saying is that my parents didn't ship me off to camp every summer#we just did things as a family together. i remember the time and bonding with them. and i modeled that behavior#and not to brag but i think I turned out alright#anyway tangent over!
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cuteniaarts · 6 months
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Fanny, my sweet, beautiful girl
17.11.2012 – 14.04.2019
#my art#artists on tumblr#I cannot accept that it has been 5 years already#I know covid messed with everyone’s sense of time but it simultaneously feels so much longer and so much shorter than that#exactly five years ago I was holding onto my mom for dear life and sobbing as we watched lilo and stitch together#not the best movie to watch when you’ve just lost your first ever pet you know#and then I cried myself to sleep at the next morning we never mentioned her again#I know it’s because it was way too painful for everyone involved. but I do wish I was allowed to process that grief properly#instead of bottling it up and pretending everything was okay until I was reminded of her#feeling like my heart was being shattered over and over again every single time#well anyway. enough of that. I’ve allowed myself a nice long cry today and got most of it out of my system#and once I was feeling okay I decided to draw her#and I can count the number of times I’ve drawn animals on one hand so.. I’m not too sure about the result#but it felt like to commemorate her in some way.#so yeah. here she is. my dear girl. the best dog in existence. she was always so affectionate and kind#which I didn’t always appreciate bc of how young I was. when you’re a kid it feels like pets will live forever#never barked. never bit anyone. her only crime was chewing on my mlp and lps toys that I left out on the floor#but I’m grateful she did that. it taught me not to leave my toys lying around and to clean up after myself#she really was taken from me way too soon. ideally she could still be alive right now. but I’ve been down the road of guilt and regret#there was nothing I could do. I was a child. I can only hope that she knew she was loved right until the very end#even if I didn’t know how to show it properly. and great. now I’m tearing up again#I suppose it’s unavoidable. April 12th will always be a melancholy day. and maybe that’s not such a bad thing#it’s good to have a day when I can freely remember her and cry if I need to. it’s healthy. it’s better than crying every day#she never liked it much when I cried. always tried to comfort me. that’s the kind of dog she was. I miss her so much#when I move apartments and get a dog of my own I’m getting a spaniel. just like she was#well. maybe a different colour so I don’t end up sobbing every time I look at it. but spaniels really are the perfect breed#I mean. cavaliers especially were bred for love and warmth. that’s just what I need. it will be nice to have someone waiting for me at home#and while I don’t necessarily believe in the afterlife… I do hope that Fanny’s watching over me#spiritually comforting me when I feel all alone in the world. it’s a nice thought for sure#and hopefully she won’t mind me getting another spaniel too much. it will be done in her honour after all. to make up for my past mistakes
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actual photo of me, mirrored:
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but fr tho my cervical issues are so fucking annoying. they got better after i started wearing braces and fixing my overbite. at least, the nerve area around my ear doesn't get pinched in a way my whole arm gets numb anymore, that's a major progress finally i can play vidya whole day again but other than that, i can literally show this screenshot when asked "how are you doing?" in regards to my neck pain. literally shows every area on my face that is numb, inflamed, tickles, itches, contracts, and hurts all the time. it's so annoying and what i hate about it the most is how it affects my hearing and probably also contributes to the brain fog in one way or another idk high chances that my arteries got pinched too and my brain literally doesn't get enough oxygen, but i still haven't done tests to confirm that
on top of that, a dumb habit that i should cease for good is sitting on my legs up to 10 hours a day because it got to the point that i fucked them up so bad, i ended up constantly pulling them in my sleep and waking up from the pain worse than when i had my bone tissue drilled through with minimal anesthesia. like holy shit i used to be scared of dentists because i considered pain from getting my teeth drilled through the worst, but nope it's not, it's so fucking far from what a stiff body with a lifestyle like mine can go through
on the brighter side, daily yoga seems to be cancelling two decades of my dumbfuckery pretty quickly. more so, i manage to reach spots that i couldn't reach ever in my life before. this actually really excites me, because it shatters the concept of being "too late" for changing things that one was supposed to take care of earlier. i also have been approaching my whole life from a different, more philosophical perspective for last few years and every hardship i go through seems like a challenge these days.
i don't think i'm truly suffering like i used to anymore, at all. i may seem like i do, every time i rant or vent, because on a surface level it looks the same as before. but to me, a really thick, miserable layer of suffering that used to make me feel like i'm poisoned, imprisoned in this existence, locked in my body, forsaken and ultimately defeated, for long years and decades, is gone. venting doesn't make me feel worse, quite the other way round; it makes me feel like i'm embracing hardships, processing them, rather than avoiding, denying, and running away from them. funny how therapy and psychiatry was taking healing away from me this whole time, heh. instead i found it in places that psych-simps told will ruin me. but that's a story for some other day i guess.
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berryblu-soda · 1 year
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call my kalanchoe theseus´ ship, the way it doesnt have a single one of the leaves it had when i first got it *tiny sob*
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primoredial-jade · 2 years
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wow i really love kaeya
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h34dnull-moved · 2 years
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kieran is either 6'5 or 5'3 in my head no in between
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dandyshucks · 2 months
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havent said it for a while bc I've been so busy but just know. I am thinking about that guy (guz) every day. and i love him SOOO much dhfjdkdl
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honeyed-disgraceful · 6 months
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My grief at this point is just anger because I'm in a cage made for me by others and I either kill myself or keep going. But people need me so I'm gonna be fucking angry about it. Then one day I Will kill myself
#i fucking hate this family and their inherent need of me#i fucking hate all the trauma and health issues they caused me#everyone had a hand in my undoing here and i am pissed about it.#imagine i had a healthy relationship with literally anything instead of having to cope like a little bitch#because NO MATTER how much i help and no matter how much i fucking do#they still have the same self awareness and ability to change as a fucking floor tile.#i am the only fucking person here doing anything to try and remove the fucking dysfunctionality piece by fucking piece all on my own#and i hate all of them for making me fo it#every day i am more angry at them for not changing their toxic behaviour ingrained in them#and every day i am pissed at myself for having pity and hope and help to fucking give#i should become like my brother. i should take from them and leave them for dead. especially my brother. every day i hope he perishes#at his own fucking hand#he is the catalyst of all problems right now and ngl i am fucking tired of him#every single day he does his best to worsen everything for everyone#and no this is not a 'omg they were mean to me' rant#this is 'fuck they are dependent on me financially emotionally and physically and im forced to help because#even though they have never helped me with anything and beaten me down in a hole; i still have my own morals that i cannot seem to let go of#type thing.#i would be so well off if i didnt have to deal with this fucking bullshit#every single day i regret not killing myself at 19 actually#because now i have not only my burdens that THEY put over my head but also theirs because they cannot fucking regulate themselves. adults.#i am bone deep tired#i am 24 in 2 days and i just wish i was 3m under dirt.#misc
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