#i honestly feel so tempted to hurt myself

[pixie-skull]

I am so tired of trying and trying. I am not going to do anything, yet if want to talk to me, not going to stop you.

[gay-dorito-dust]

ok what if reader is also a vigilante?

reader and Jason met in their civilian identities, and after a while they start dating. but like, neither of them tells the other one about their vigilante identities? and then something random happens and they both find out in a funny way?

(alsooo can I be 🐈‍⬛? :3)

Idk if this is considered ‘funny’ but I tired, oh and Yes, you may be 🐈‍⬛ anon. 🦦

When you first met Jason in the cosy book store, you were far too concerned with keeping your stint as a vigilante as close to a secret as possible, so much so that the mere aspect of dating wasn’t something you contemplated on a day to day basis; Never less dating a civilian when you’re fighting street level thugs. However you couldn’t help but get lost in the beauty of his smile, his eyes and the way he ran his hand through his hair.

All you were aware in that moment was that Jason is just perfection in a six foot something frame. He was just that beautiful that you couldn’t find yourself looking away from him, ever; It had to be illegal to be that beautiful.

When Jason first met you in the cosy book store, trying to reach for a book that was just out of reach, he was far too concerned about the new vigilante that had taken to the street of Gotham. Nightshade was their name and they obviously had natural talent but were still sloppy in some areas, but they showed enough promise in their debut outing to be apart of the Outlaws. Dating was the last thing he needed honestly, despite affection, loyalty and love were something he deeply longer for more so then anything, however he felt a little tempted by the idea when you gave him a look of gratitude as he handed you the book was enough to set him alight.

‘Jason.’ He blurted.

‘Come again?’ You asked.

‘My name. It’s Jason.’ He clarified, internally cursing himself for making himself looking like a right idiot in front of you, but you just had that effect on him and it hadn’t even been ten minutes upon meeting you. Was he really that depraved? He asked himself as in that very moment you decided to smile at him, which gave him his answer that yes, he was indeed that depraved for a genuine connection. ‘Well it’s nice to meet you Jason. I’m y/n.’ You greeted, finding Jason absolutely endearing and insufferably cute. ‘Do you often help people with books or is it just a one time thing?’ You then asked, holding the book close to your chest, biting the inside of your cheek.

‘I don’t come here as often as I promised myself I would, so consider this as a rare occurrence.’ Jason shrugged, leaning against the shelf. ‘So do you come here often or are you a fellow procrastinator?’ You chuckled and Jason has to pat himself on the back for that one. He managed to make you laugh and god did it sound ethereal. ‘I’m kinda a fellow procrastinator but that’s because I’ve been busy with life and such.’ You told him, not wanting to admit to everything to a conventionally attractive man you’ve just met at a small, run down book store just yet; You didn’t want to fuck this up for yourself.

‘Oh yeah? Then maybe if you come here more often, I’ll have more of a reason to stop by other than the books.’ Jason said and you felt your smile even wider and tighten your grip on the book, casting your eyes to the floor. Curse this beautiful man for making you feel like a silly little schoolgirl either way a crush, it was both embarrassing as it was all consuming. ‘Sounds like you’re asking me on a date, mr Jason.’

Jason shrugs. ‘Maybe I am, maybe I’m not. I mean is it wrong for me to want to get to know you better?’

‘I guess it wouldn’t hurt.’ You admitted.

‘So it’s a date?’ Jason asked, anticipating your answer.

‘Yeah. It’s a date.’ You replied, feeling a warmth flood through your body, followed by a feeling of nervousness simultaneously it was hard to figure out which feeling you should focus on.

Several book store dates, skirting your obvious feelings for one another and moving into his apartment later, you and Jason were officially a couple: and a happy one at that. And yet despite sharing everything to one another, every deep secret you’ve ever kept in your entire life and yet the one secret neither of you chose to disclose was your vigilante identities, and for simple and justifiable reasons on both your parts; You didn’t want Jason to be brought into the crossfire as a casualty and Jason didn’t want you to get hurt because of the dangerous people he wronged as RedHood. You’ve both hated yourselves for keeping a tight lid on your vigilantism but you knew it was for the betterment of the other, after all ignorance was indeed -on some occasions- bliss.

However on this very night, everything you and Jason have ever hidden from the other had decided to come to light but not in a way that’d either of you were expecting.

You and Jason were cuddled up on the couch and enjoying a peaceful evening in together, seeing as for a week straight both of you have had your hands full with capturing and clearing the streets of Gotham of thugs, goons and drug dealers, and actually getting the golden opportunity to act like an ordinary couple and shower the other in the love and affection that you’ve both been aching for the entire week.

‘You need to get some better sleep Jaybirdie, I can see dark bags starting to form under your eyes.’ You mutter softly as you run your calloused thumbs under his eyes, naturally concerned for his health and well-being. ‘Are you saying that I’m not that appealing to look at anymore because I’m developing eye bags? How shallow of you babe.’ Jason joked as he moved his face from your hands and looking away from you with a pout on his lips.

You laughed, reaching to hold his face in your hands again and gently made him look at you. ‘Stop being dramatic my little Jay bird, I think you make eyes bags work for you but I just don’t like the idea of you staying up longer than you should.’ You said as you kissed his lips and then under his eyes, feeling him hum in content as he dragged you into him tightly. ‘I appreciate the compliment babe.’ He said as he pressed a kiss to your head, closing his eyes as he breathed you in deeply. ‘I’m sorry we haven’t had enough time with each other lately.’

You burrowed yourself deeper into him, hands clutching at his shirt. ‘it’s okay Jason and besides I should sorry too because there’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you for a while now. I hope you don’t hate me afterwards.’ You admit, scared that this might break your beautiful relationship with the sweetest man you’ve ever met, who had been nothing but unquestionably loyal to you through and through. ‘You could do no wrong pretty baby,’ Jason cooed, ‘but since we’re sharing things, I have something that I’ve been keeping from you also sweetheart.’ Jason said as he feared that he’d only be scaring you away afterwards and he can only hope that you’d stay and hear him out.

‘No, Jason you don’t-‘ you were cut off by the sound of two emergency alerts going off from your shared bedroom and before leaping off of Jason’s lap, much to his displeasure and worry, and rushed towards the bedroom with Jason hot on your heels going on about something you couldn’t quite make out over the noise of the emergency alerts. It was rare that it goes off and when it does, it’s when someone like scarecrow or Joker has made a reemergence to the public and when they do, nothin good ever comes to pass.

Within the depths of your shared closet in your bedroom were two equal sized duffel bags. Inside these duffel bags held everything to do with your vigilante personas that you and Jason had hastily shoved inside, and all before you officially moved into his apartment too. You never touched his out of respect for him and he never touched yours out of respect also, you both knew which one belong to who as they also sat just beneath your own civilians clothes, that and the fact that Jason’s duffel bag was a lot more beat up and rugged compared to yours which only had slight wears and tears; but other then that it was relatively a new bag.

Right of this moment however you didn’t stop to think about which bag you’ve picked up because before you knew it you had locked yourself within the bathroom, just about ready to change into your attire, when you were face to face with a familiar red helmet causing you to freeze in place. While you were trying to grasp the idea that your beautiful, beautiful Jason was the ruthless RedHood, a knock on the bathroom door broke you from your thoughts, and you automatically knew that Jason saw your vigilante attire and was feeling a similar sort of confusion towards you as you were about him. You placed the red helmet back into the duffle bag, zipped it shut before unlocking and opening the door wide enough for Jason to hold out your duffel bag towards you.

‘I believe this is yours sweetheart.’ He said awkwardly.

‘Thank you Jaybirdie.’ You mutter as you took the bag off of him, placing it down on the toilet seat as you picked up his duffel bag and handed it to him through the gap in the doorway. ‘I believe this belongs to you.’

‘Thank you sweetheart.’ Jason replied as he took the bag off of your hands as an uncomfortable air of silence followed as you both stood on either sides of the door, not knowing how to properly address the situation. Until… ‘I knew I recognise that ass in spandex anywhere.’

‘JASON!’ You exclaimed, face becoming flushed.

‘What? It’s true you’ve got a distinctly shaped ass! So of course I’m going to recognise it!’ Jason replied, throwing his hands up in the air.

‘So you’ve admitted to staring at my ass like a perv?’ You asked, crossing your arms over your chest.

Jason pushed the bathroom door open fully to get closer to you and hold your face in his hands. ‘Don’t start acting like you haven’t stared at my ass like a perv, perv.’ He says with a chuckle upon seeing the expression upon your face, pressing kisses from your forehead and all the way down to the tip of your nose. ‘I thought you wouldn’t notice.’ You murmur softly, making Jason laugh as he lead you out of the bathroom and into the bedroom, where he then sat you down on the end of the bed and held your hand.

‘Well unfortunately for you, I do notice and I can’t say I don’t like the attention that I’d get for my charming parent.’ Jason says as he kisses the back of your hand. ‘You’re not mad that I’m a vigilante and have been keeping it from you all this time?’ You asked, running your thumb over his hand. ‘No because it would be quite hypocritical if I did because I’ve been keeping the same secret hidden from you also. Would you be mad at me being RedHood?’ Jason asked and you immeditly replied ‘no because I know you did so to keep me safe.’

‘Ans I know that you didn’t tell me for the exact same reason.’ Jason butted in. ‘Now that we know however, this just means that we’re even more of a kick ass couple because we literally kick ass every night and I couldn’t be more prouder of you baby.’ He add as he presses kisses to your face, making you chuckle before pulling away. ‘But that doesn’t mean I won’t stop worry about my baby. So expect a whole lot of team ups in the future okay chipmunk?’ You pressed a kiss to his cheek before stealing one from his lips as you stood up from the bed, tugging at his arm. ‘Why don’t we start teaming up now? RedHood and Nightshade, they’ll never see us coming by a long shot!’ You said and Jason couldn’t help but smile at your excitement as he then stood up, groaning dramatically. ‘Alright, alright, quick pulling my arm and get changed so we can go catch us some bad guys.’

You beamed brightly as you stole another kiss from his lips. ‘I love you Jaybirdie.’

‘The things I do for you buttercup.’ Jason spoke against your lips as he kisses you again.

[beastofburdenxo]

Arrangements

Tommy and his new "business deal" officially meet.

No smut. Requested by @koalamysterio

Age gap relationship. She's early 20s, and he's pushing 40.

Tommy walks in the empty Garrison. He figures it would be best to meet you before the wedding to soothe your fears. You are young and pretty, and your family used you as a pawn in their latest business deal with the Shelby's. In return for helping them out, Tommy gets you for himself.

The bell rings above the door, signaling his arrival. You try and duck behind the bar to hide from him. You've heard rumors about what he does, and you're afraid of him. Tommy sits calmly at the bar, like any normal day. "Please come out, love." He lights his cigarette. "I won't hurt you. Please let me see you." You timidly peak out from behind the bar, fear evident in your eyes. "There she is. Have any drink you like love. All of this will soon be yours."

You gain a bit of bravery and fully stand. "I don't want any of it." This makes Tommy chuckle. "I know. Honestly, this whole arrangement thing is new to me too. I surprised myself and my family by agreeing to it." You look anywhere but at him. "So why did you?" You wait for his answer. "I can see that they are not the best people. You are not like them, I can see it in your eyes. I figure getting a sweet thing like you away from them and into my arms would soften the blow of their eventual betrayal."

"So I'm just supposed to be your pain killer? Your arm candy? I literally have met you one time, Tommy! This isn't fair!" You freeze at your tone towards Tommy, afraid he'll come over the bar at you. "I know it's not, love. But your life will be better now. You may be getting married to me, but you still have free will. Anything you want is yours. The Shelby name will open so many doors for you. Your family will no longer have a say in what you do once you are mine. I have no desire to hinder you and keep you locked in a big house all day."

Being locked in a big house is all you know, so this is very tempting. The trips, the shopping, no more being a personal maid to your overbearing family. You may come from money, but your family acts like you are just the help. there is just one more hurdle. "Will I have to sleep with you?" You whisper, cheeks turning red. Tommy raises his eyebrow at this. "Well, would you like to? You'll be my wife, after all." You look down at the floor in embarrassment. Tommy picks up on this immediately. "I will never force you love. Never. Hell, you can have your own room for awhile if that makes you feel better. On a different floor even. I know of your innocence, and I want you to know that nothing will happen without your say so. I'm not an animal. We can just be roommates and get to know each other a bit, yeah? Would that be okay?"

You meet his eyes for the first time today. There is no malice in them, just slight concern at what you thought he would do to you. "You promise Tommy?" He reaches over and grabs your delicate hand. "I promise sweetheart. I will only touch you when you are ready for me to. I may be an older man, but I'm not like your father. I will take such good care of you. Now, I will have to kiss you at the wedding." This causes a slight smile to form on your face. "But after that, nothing else until you say. I promise."

Your fears are slightly eased. You just don't know how to feel about having your first kiss ever in front of a bunch of people. "Well, I've got to go, sweetheart. I'll see you at the wedding Mrs Shelby?" Your heart races at hearing your new title."I'll see you there, Tommy. "

[dipperscavern]

Dunno if im doing this right lol but can I have a Spell Casting with Jon and the prompt 'always turning their head when your name is mentioned' in the sort of way that the reader does dumb shit and Jon knows that she would have done something stupid. Also, if It's not too much to ask can the reader be a Bolton who betrayed her brother and helped Sansa escape (no one ever writes this trope and I'm half tempted to write it myself lol)

Also, congrats on 1k!!! Honestly, your writings the best and you deserve way more. Loves you Dippy <33

absoloutely, thank you for the ask!! love u more <33

3. always turning their head if your name is mentioned

ʚ‎‏ ͜ ̩͙ ︵ ̩͙ ୨ ♡ ୧ ̩͙ ‏︵ ̩͙ ͜ ɞ

it was a surreal feeling, being back in winterfell.

not just for jon, but for you, sansa, and theon. the place you had fought so hard to escape, and here you were, barely a week later.

some had doubts about whether you could be trusted, but sansa was steadfast in her assurance of your loyalty — without you, she would’ve never survived. even with the princesses advocation, for a while, all people could see when they looked at you was your last name.

no matter peoples prejudice, you had quickly asserted yourself as nothing like your brother. you were light-hearted and fun — always getting yourself into trouble, yet somehow usually managing to weasel your way out of consequences. if anything was happening, you could be found in the very center of it, and that’s one of the (many) things that jon grew to love about you.

even with your differences, you and jon just fit. normally regarded as stoic and brooding, jon found that the smiles came easier around you. you had that cheeriness that reminded jon of sam, except he didn’t find himself near as taken with sam as he was with you. he’s not quite sure how you weaseled your way into his heart, but you have, and there you stay.

even with the mother of dragons arriving to winterfell, and the impending threat of white-walkers bringing eternal darkness, somehow, you’re the same as you’ve always been. to everyone, it’s a welcome relief among all the gloom that’s surrounded winterfells usually-warm feeling atmosphere.

“Where’s Bolton?”

jon pauses his inspection of the dragon-glass daggers, and his head turns in the direction of the voice that spoke your name. he spots the most peculiar conversation he’s seen yet, where sandor clegane and dolorous edd are stood facing one another.

edd looks around for a moment, before returning his gaze to sandor. “In the dirt, haven’t you heard?”

“Not the bastard, you idiot — the girl.” before jon could ask why sandor clegane could possibly be looking for you, his question is answered. “I heard her and the ginger are arm wrestling.”

arm wrestling? you and tormund?

jon thinks he may have misheard, but he’s proven wrong when a look of recognition adorns edds face. “Ah, the hot one.” he says. “In the entrance hall.”

edd juts his head in the direction towards the castle, and sandor looks that way, before giving edd a brief nod and walking off. he notices jon looking, and only widens his eyes a bit, before making his way towards jon.

“Arm wrestling?”

jon must sound as in disbelief as he is, and edd only raises his brows, shrugging. “He proclaimed his unyielding strength, and she’s got a point to prove.” he says, and catches the look on jon’s face that tells him that he doesn’t approcr. “So what? It’s only the end of the world.”

jon only sighs, shaking his head, before walking off in sandors direction.

no, he didn’t mind you having fun — quite the contrary. you (safely) having fun was jon’s favorite activity to watch. but sometimes, tormund can overstep. he means well, truly, but him not remembering to be careful and accidentally hurting you is a situation that’s completely plausible. and jon can’t stand the idea of you being hurt. he picks up his pace, walking briskly toward the castle.

as edd watches jon leave, he looks to gendry, widening his eyes in a shared look.

ʚ‎‏ ͜ ̩͙ ︵ ̩͙ ୨ ♡ ୧ ̩͙ ‏︵ ̩͙ ͜ ɞ

[hwanghyunjinenthusiast]

Ease

AN: Yes, I caved. I was tempted to write about Seonghwa instead, but I realised I haven't written anything for San yet, so here we are. What can I say, I am a weakling for men with children. Shoutout to Troye Sivan for the title.

Synopsis: After a particularly rough day with months of working on your latest book finally coming to an end, your husband reminds you that's he'll always be there for you. In every way he can be.

General tags: Choi San x Fem! Reader, Reader and San are married with a daughter, Writer! Reader, Househusband! San, hurt and comfort elements, fluff and mentions of alcohol and alcohol consumption.

Smut tags: Switchy tendencies from both Reader and San, nipple play (f. and m. receiving), dirty talk, oral sex (f. receiving), fingering (f. receiving), unprotected piv sex, elements of objectification (m. receiving), not a breeding kink but, San gets off (like a lot) cumming inside of Reader and creampie.

Word count: 5738

I will block you if you are a minor and have no easily visible indication of your age on your blog if you interact with me in any way.

Your apartment is silent for the most part when you slip in. You can faintly hear San in the kitchen, but there's no signs of your daughter's signature laugh and nonstop rambling filling the space of your home. The quiet reminds of you of a time that seems as though it was a lifetime ago when it was just San and you. The nostalgia causes a smile to rise to your lips as you place your bag down on the couch and journey your way into the kitchen.

Affection bubbles inside of you as San hums a tune you don't recognise while he cooks. You have no idea what he's making but, the scent invades your nostrils and your stomach growls. Not loud enough to alert him but, loud enough that you remember that the last thing you consumed was an iced coffee during lunch with your editor. Your nerves too fried to even think about eating. The meeting why you've come home so late that your daughter isn't even up to welcome you home.

You try your best to ignore the way that twists your stomach.

Perhaps it's the sheer exhaustion of the day, or the guilt, or just that you simply love your husband that prompts you to walk towards him and wrap your arms around his waist. You laugh into his shoulder when he jumps slightly, nearly dropping the pepper in his shock.

"Jesus, you scared me," he huffs, but there's no real bite in his voice. One of his hands reaching down to give your own a squeeze.

"You were too focused on your cooking I guess," you respond, feeling lighter than you have in months.

"In my defence, this is a great pasta," he retorts, and you can hear the grin in his voice. He lowers the heat before turning in your embrace. You don't know if you'll ever grow indifferent to just how stunning your husband. His dimples poking through as he smiles at you and his arms wrap around your waist.

"How'd it go?" He asks, giving you his undivided attention, and you'll never quite understand how you convinced this man to fall in love with you, marry you, and have a child with you.

You groan a little dramatically, resting your head against his shoulder. His chest vibrates with his soft chuckles, but he waits for you to respond nonetheless, "A lot better than I was expecting. Hongjoong said he was impressed with the first draft and he probably won't have to edit much. Which is great news but, fuck me that was one of the most tense meetings of my life."

"Why's that baby?" He asks, his thumbs rubbing soothing circles into your skin.

"I don't think I've poured this much of myself into a book ever, Sannie. God, I'm sure you know that better than anyone. I honestly don't know how I would've reacted if he didn't like it. I think I would've just broken down," you half joke.

He hums, choosing his words carefully before speaking, "I think sometimes it's easy to forget how talented you are because no one reads your work more than you. Even Hongjoong," he says with an uptick of his lips, "You're right that no one knows how much you worked on this draft more than me. Which is why I was confident it'd be received well," he says, leaning his forehead against yours.

"I'm so proud of you. I always will be."

Tears spring to your eyes completely unbidden. You clutch onto him tighter, your body seemingly determined to meld itself as close to his as possible. San, for his part, doesn't seem to mind. Holding you to his solid form just as closely.

"I love you," you whisper into him. Honestly, you don't expect him to hear you so his, "I love you too," and kiss to your forehead catch you off-guard. Fortunately his next frantic mutter of 'shit' helps to diffuse the tension. Before you can ask what's wrong, he turns away from you once more to stir the pasta. Tension leaving his shoulders when it appears to not have burned.

You take that opportunity to lift yourself up onto the counter and observe his broad back once more. "I'm surprised our little energiser bunny isn't here," you start. You know you're home later than usual but, she's typically still up by now.

He laughs at that, the sound filling the kitchen wonderfully and setting butterflies alight in your stomach, "She's come down with a bit of a cold," the news makes you frown, your grip on the counter growing harsher, "It's nothing too bad but, she has been sleeping earlier over the past few days."

God, how could you miss that? Sometimes, it still leaves you stunned that she's already two. How much more of her life are you going to miss?

"Don't do that."

Your eyes fly up to meet the back of San's head. He seems satisfied with the dish, turning off the stove and setting the pot on one of the cool plates.

"I can hear you beating yourself up from here," he says, turning to you, and it takes a tremendous amount of effort not to shy away from the knowing look on his face. "You're a great mother. I know that, and so does she. Just because you didn't catch that she caught a cold like what, three days ago? Doesn't mean anything."

The guilt still remains but, it's significantly less than it was moments ago. You'll never understand how he does that.

"Now come on, I made this kick ass pasta, and I know you're really hungry right now," he says with a smile. "Grab one of your favourite bottles. I think we've earned it."

San was right. His pasta is delicious. Which shouldn't surprise you, but when you take your first forkful, you're still left stunned. You don't remember the last time you drank something that wasn't water, coffee, or an energy drink, so the wine is a welcome change of pace. The liquid warming your blood and your face and helping you feel more relaxed than you have in ages.

San being the main reason you feel so at ease. It really has been longer than you care to think about since the two of you have had the time to just be with one another. No looming thoughts of work or cleaning or nap times. Just the two of you basking in one another's presence.

"I think I'm going to take a bath before bed," you say once the two of you start clearing your plates and glasses, the wine still lingering pleasantly in your system, "Do you want to join me?"

The look he gives you sends lightning down your spine, straight to the apex of your thighs, "Is this your way of coming onto me?" He even has the nerve to shoot you a lopsided grin over one of his stupidly broad shoulders.

"I'm not not coming onto you but, I was just offering, if you want to."

He laughs at that, "Fair enough. I think I'm going to finish cleaning up here. Feel free to go on ahead, you've more than earned it."

"I can help you, if you'd like."

San waves you off, "I've got this. Now shoo. Go soak to your heart's content with all of your fancy soaps and fragrances."

You hesitate momentarily but, San shoots you a look that leaves little room for argument. With that you, you trudge your way down the hall towards your bedroom. However, you pass your daughter's room on the way there and are unable to push down that suddenly visceral urge to see her. So, ever so slightly and as quietly as humanly possible, you take a peak.

San was right, she's out like a light. Her soft inhales and exhales and little snores filling the space of her bedroom while she clutches onto her favourite blanket. You can hear the nasally quality to her breathing, and that makes you frown, but she's resting now, and that's all you can really ask for at the moment. Just as silently, you shut her door once more. The lightness that comes with just seeing her washing over you.

With that, you continue on your way to your bedroom, smiling at your neatly made bed before stripping out of your 'work clothes.' Which feels absurd to say since your typical work attire consisted of a hoodie and sweats but, you did have an array of more official attire specifically for meetings with Hongjoong, new releases and book signings. A quiet laugh leaves you when you remember that San confessed he thinks you look hot in them once. If you didn't feel little better than a log right now, you'd fuck him while wearing them again.

Shaking those memories from your mind, you drop your clothes into the laundry hamper. You yawn a little as you walk towards the bathroom. Honestly, a warm bath before crawling into your sheets and coiling yourself around San sounds like a dream right now. Despite his dramatics, you opt for a much simpler vanilla scented bath bomb to dissolve into your water this time around. Your eyes fluttering shut, and a moan echoing throughout the bathroom when you sink into the water. The warm temperature practically making you melt as you sink lower and lower.

You might just fall asleep right here.

However, the grime of your day is still on your skin, so you grab your washcloth and begin scrubbing it away. Humming a tone you're not quite sure where you heard as you go. You're too engrossed, and your mind is a little too hazy to notice San slip into the bathroom. He simply watches you for a few moments. Taking in the way the droplets of water run down your shoulders and your melodic voice caresses his ears.

"Need any help with that?"

Embarrassment causes your face to prickle with warmth when the water around you splashes at your startled jump. San at least has the decency to stifle his laughter as he walks over to you. Look far too amused for your liking.

"Jesus San, you scared me. Give a woman a warning," you say, melting into his touch when his strong hands ease themselves onto your shoulders.

"I'm sorry, baby," he doesn't sound all that sorry, and the laughter in his voice is yet to dissipate. Any complaints you have die on your tongue when he begins to knead the stiff muscles of your shoulder. Your eyes fluttering shut and soft moans of appreciation filling the bathroom as he works every knot and ache he can get his hands on.

Stupid hot man with his pretty hands that know how to turn you into a puddle.

"I already washed up earlier but, I thought you'd appreciate a massage," he mutters quietly, drinking in the way you dissolve under his hands. All your brain can manage is a hum in appreciation and acknowledgement of his words. He smiles at that at least he knows he's doing a good job.

You're not sure how much time passes before you're blinking your eyes awake. Your fingers have turned pruney, and your upper back feels tender and looser than it has in months. It's past time to get out of the bath, you think.

"Sannie, I think I'm ready to get out now. Thank you for the massage," you mutter, grabbing his hand and kissing his palm before draining the bathtub and stepping out.

"You're welcome," San responds a little dazed and, acting as though he hasn't seen you in the nude thousands of times at this point. It does wonders for your self-esteem, however.

You suppress a laugh as you wrap your towel around your body, and the trance he was in comes to an end.

"Let's go to bed."

You opt for one of San's older, majorly oversized shirts as your choice of sleepwear for the night. It brings you back to the earlier months of your relationship when he first shyly said you could keep it. He still wore it on occasion, so his scent still lingers on it just the way you love.

For all your teasing at his expense in the bathroom, you find yourself with your tongue tied when your eyes land on his bare torso. His bottom half is not much better since he's wearing boxers that cling to his thighs in a way that causes you to swallow. Hard.

If this is his way of attempting to seduce you, it's working. Maybe a little too well.

Magically, your legs remember how to work, and you manage to walk to your bed without tripping over yourself. If San notices your odd behaviour, he doesn't say much, choosing instead wrap you up in his arms as soon as you're within reach.

Your skin burns everywhere he touches. His fingers drawing nonsensical patterns over your thigh that he's strawn over himself. Your arm naturally drapping over his broad chest. You're surrounded by him and, suddenly you wonder why sleep was on your mind in the slightest.

"It was nice getting to spend some one on one time with you," he says, his eyes swallowing you whole when he sets them on you. You'll never understand how he manages to lace the most mundane comments with so much intensity.

"Mmm, I've missed it too," you confess, and it's true. Between the chaotic nature of both of your jobs and a child to raise, you two rarely have nights such as tonight for yourselves. Perhaps it's fondness or a simple want to that drives you to press a delicate kiss to his jaw.

Your insides twist themselves into knots when San's eyes turn heavy, he searches your face for something before speaking, "Are you tired?"

His intent couldn't be more clear if he literally spelled it out for you.

"No."

His hand drifts from your thigh to cup your face. His thumb dragging itself along your bottom lip and the temptation to take it into your mouth is visceral. However, you choose to see what he does instead with baited breath. His eyes follow the trail of his thumb as though it's the most significant sight in the world. You may just lose your mind if he doesn't just kiss you.

Fortunately for you, San doesn't keep you waiting for long. He kisses you slowly, a far cry from the months of hurried, frenzied kisses before either of you have to start your day or your daughter wakes up from one of her naps. Hands snaking between thighs to make sure you're wet and he's hard enough because quickies are the majority of what you've had the time and energy for.

Tonight, however, San kisses you as though you two have all of the time in the world. His thumb tracing your jaw as his tongue licks its way into your mouth. He even has the audacity to laugh when you whimper into him because of the intrusion. His laughter doesn't last, however, a strangled groan leaving him when you lightly nip his bottom lip.

A startled gasp flies from you when he rolls you on your back. His eyes are lidded and dark with barely restrained want as he looks down at you. This time, the way he kisses you is decidedly less tender. He doesn't hesitate to practically shove his tongue down your throat.

His muscular arms cage you in and, it's difficult to tell who moans louder when his half hard cock presses against your bare pussy. "You're not wearing anything?" He mutters against your jaw, sloppily kissing any skin he can as he slowly grinds against you. It's not easy to find your words with how all encompassing he is. Your nails biting into his shoulders. God, when did he get so jacked?

"No," you moan out finally when his teeth trace your pulse point and he brushes your clit, "I'm not." Some kissing and grinding and, you can already feel yourself getting wet. It really has been longer than you care to think about.

"Oh, you wanted this then," he breathes, one of his hands dragging up your body. His hand cups one of your breasts over his shirt, his thumb dragging circles over your nipple that pokes through the fabric, and that prompts your hips to jolt up into him. A drawn out whimper of his name ringing out through your bedroom, "You could've just said so, baby. I'd happily fuck you."

Between his ministrations, words and the petname, your walls clench hard around nothing. "San," is all your brain can supply at the moment. Your back arching when he playfully pinches your nipple between his fingers.

"Poor baby," he coos into your throat between licks and kisses, "Already so worked up. Don't worry, I'll take care of you." You don't have the presence of mind to bite back a whine when he separates himself from you. The amused smirk that spreads on his face twists the knife of arousal deeply embedded in your gut. He doesn't stay away from you for long. His hands impatiently tugging your sleeping shirt over your head and, tossing it somewhere on your bedroom floor.

You rarely feel shy with San. You've never had a reason to but, sometimes, when his face softens and he looks at you like he can't quite believe you're real and naked in front of him like he is now, the urge to cover your face does crop up.

"You're so beautiful," he whispers so quietly that you almost think he didn't mean to verbalise that particular thought. His kisses along your collarbone are featherlight, barely there as he trails his way down to your breasts. Your fingers weave themselves in his hair, and your breathing grows increasingly laboured when he kisses the tops of them. His eyes find yours through the locks of his hair when he licks at your nipple slowly.

Yours nearly flutter shut. Your body instinctively pressing into him to feel more. To feel as much as you possibly can. You tug on his hair harsher than you intend to when he finally envelopes it in his warm, wet mouth. His appreciative groan going straight to your clit. No matter how many times you've been with each other, San is ever the starved man. He sucks and licks and fondled as though he might die if he doesn't have as much of you as he can. For your part, all you can do is squirm and writhe, ever tug adding to the slick smearing your inner thighs.

He leaves your breast with a pop that is louder than strictly necessary. His eyes almost appear black when the search for yours again. The glazed quality to them makes you want to rub your thighs together but, he's firmly slotted between them. He holds your gaze as he kisses down your torso. Your breath hitching when he kisses just above your swollen clit.

"You smell so good," he moans and, you finally noticing him rutting against the mattress. God, if you weren't already beyond worked up. That thought is swiftly knocked out of your when when he does take his first lick of you. It's slow and drawn out. Starting from your dribbling entrance and ending at your clit. You never stood a chance.

Something broken and animalistic bubbles out of San's chest then. His hold on your thighs firm. Keeping you exactly where and how he wants you so you can't squirm away from him. A pitchy keen echoes throughout your bedroom when he fully wraps his lips around your clit. Years of experience making him an expert at pushing you to the the edge of your sanity in a matter of mintures. You're not quite sure what to do with your hands. They're restless. Not sure whether you want to claw at the sheets or play with your breasts but, you eventually settle on familiar territory. Electing to wind them in his dark locks once again.

They tug especially hard when his fingers toy with your weeping entrance. Collecting your arousal in his fingertips and swallowly thrusting into you. You both know that's not nearly enough for you and you whine brokenly, tugging on his hair harder. Prompting a moan from him and the vibrations sending shudders from the top of your spine to your extremities.

"San please," you finally cry out, bucking your hips into his face, "Your fingers. Please, please-"

You nearly choke on your spit when he complies. Pushing two fingers into gradually until he's knuckles deep inside of you. You're beyond wet so the stretch is minimal, but there's still enough of one to prompt some whimpers from you. He distracts with that stupidly skillful mouth of his. Drawing patterns on your clit with his tongue he knows will render you devoid of thought.

Your body jerks harshly when he moves his fingers. The first curls of them inside of you are so, so good. However, when San finds the part of your walls that makes it feel as though your vision goes white for a second, that's when it's truly all over for you. He's ruthless. Rubbing against over and over and over again as his mouth does not relent in the slightest on your poor clit. Licking and sucking with one clear-cut goal in mind. If you somehow had the strength to keep your eyes open, you'd notice his eyes watching you intently. Drinking in every pinch of your brows and the way your pretty mouth is stuck in a permanent O. The ache in his jaw is nothing compared to any of that.

San is rewarded for his unrelenting consistently when your grip in his hair grows even harsher, to the point where it starts to sting but, he couldn't care less because you're cumming on his face and around his fingers. One of his hands shoots up to, unfortunately, cover your mouth because you were getting loud. He doesn't want to risk waking up your daughter, but he continues to lap at you and finger you through your release, albeit less intensely.

"San," you whine weakly against his hand when your consciousness trickles back into your body. Lightly tugging his face away from him. He whines but, otherwise doesn't put up much of a fight. Removing his hand from your mouth, he gradually removing his fingers from your walls and parting from your pussy with one final kiss.

Sometimes, in the private parts of your mind, you wonder if he'd ever let you take a picture of him like this. Eyes completely glassy with your wetness smeared across his nose, lips and chin, and a pretty flush colouring his tan skin. Without much of a second thought, you tug him towards you. The taste of yourself on his lips is a little salty, but it's not unpleasant. Maybe it's a little narcissistic to admit, but it kind of adds fuel to the fire in your core. San kisses you back fiercely as though his jaw hadn't been working for who knows how long. His erection is scorching and heavy against your thigh as he grinds against you shallowly.

Considering how distracted he is, it's easy to roll him onto his back. He blinks up at you in surprise and he just looks so cute you have to kiss him. So you do. Pressing kisses along his jaw as your fingernails drag along his muscular torso. You really don't know when he got this muscular or, how he even had the time to but, you're not complaining.

"You're so beautiful, Sannie," you whisper in his ear. Biting back a giggle when he flushes a deeper shade of pink and squirms underneath you, "Thank you," he mutters, but it's barely loud enough for you to hear. You manage somehow anyway.

The muscles in his abdomen jump when your fingers ghost over them. Now it's your turn to toy with him. Snapping the waistband of his boxers and delighting in the way it makes him grow more and more restless.

"Please touch me," he begs, and when he looks at you with his pretty, brown eyes and the pout he knows you're a weakling against, how could you ever say no?

You shuffle lower and drag his boxers off of him, he lifts his hips to help you along the way and his cock smacks against toned abdomen. Your walls instinctively clench hard at the sight of his cock, glistening with pre-cum that's streaked his stomach, before you even unceremoniously dispose of his boxers.

You straddle him. Leaning down to press a kiss to his lips again which he readily accepts, his hands gripping your hips hard enough that you wouldn't be surprised if his fingerprints were burned into your skin. The moan he let's out against your lips when your wet slit glides along his cock worsens the emptiness you feel but, it's always so enjoyable watching him lose his composure. Your nails dig into his shoulders with ever brush and bump against your clit, your hips picking their pace as you chase your own pleasure.

"Fuck," he groans out gutturally, "Stop teasing please."

"Well, what do you want, baby?" You ask with a faux confused tilt of your head, dragging your teeth along his neck as you continue to cover him in your arousal. You know you're probably going to pay for this later but, you'll have your fun for now.

"Fuck me, please" Well, when he asks so cutely, how could you ever deny him?

You pull away from him and grip him in your hand. He's even hotter in your palm, and his weight makes saliva pool in your mouth, but that can wait for another time. He's already more than slick enough for you so you decide to end both of your respective miseries and slowly sink down onto him.

It's been a week, maybe, since the last time you felt him inside of you, so the stretch this time does take you some adjusting. He's so thick, and even after so long, sometimes you need to take a second. San is patient as ever, even though his cock twitches with ever centimetre you manage to sink down on. That and the way his hold on your grows more desperate are the only indicators of his restraint, but he watches your face and body like a hawk. Making sure it's not too much for you.

You unintentionally claw at his abs when your ass final comes to rest on his firm thighs. Honestly, your body is still reeling from your orgasm and your thighs feel closer to jello, but you want to ride him for as long as you can. You crack your eyes open when the overwhelming sensation of him being sheathed inside of you mostly subsides, and the sight San creates reminds you why you wanted to do this in this first place.

His eyes already look so fucked out, he's barely keeping them open. However, they're open nonetheless, and his gaze is laser focused between your thighs. Utterly enraptured with watching himself completely inside of you. And his face contorts beautifully when you rise up before slowly sinking back down onto him.

His hands drift from your hips to hold onto your thighs when you find your rhythm. You can already feel the fatigue beginning to settle into your thighs with every bounce on his cock but, watching the way his brows pinch in pleasure and his moans caress your ears is enough to motivate you to keep going.

His can't seem to decide where to focus. They alternate between watching your face and the mirade of expressions that flit across it, watching the way your breasts bounce in time with your rhythm on him and watching the way his cock splits you open over and over again. Glistening with your wetness that trickles down him onto the sheets beneath the two of you.

Despite the tiredness creeping up on you, San feels good. Great, even, like he always does. One of the best parts of riding him is that you've mastered angling yourself just right that every brush of his cock sends your nerves alight. You thought maybe it would be too soon but, one of your hands leaves his abs to rub frantic circles into your clit. It's so difficult to focus on maintaining the pace you set, but you try. Despite your mind being hazy and desperate for the chance to cum again. Cum around him this time.

San doesn't complain in the slightest. In fact, based on the whines that hit your eardrums, the way his hands help you continue bouncing on him as best as you can and his cock twitches incessantly, he's happy to watch you and let you use him to cum again.

"Are you going to cum again for me, baby?" He breathes, focusing his attention fully on the apex of your thighs this time around. Shallowly thrusting up into you and taking in the way your fingers frantically rub your clit to bring yourself over the edge. He steadies himself when all you can respond with are nods and whimpers. Your eyes shut tightly as you focus on nothing but, your release.

"You're so fucking hot," he groans, "Using me to get yourself off. Please cum for me, baby. I want to watch you."

His words slam into you like a runaway train, and so does your oragsm. You couldn't maintain your pace on him even if you tried. Your thighs shake violently around him and the shudders spread throughout your entire body, your extremities curling into themselves. You try your best not to dig your nails into his skin too harshly but, your mind isn't all that there with you right now. Your walls clamping down like a vice around him so tightly that he can't thrust into you all that much.

Typically, San would happily let you ride out your climax. Waiting patiently, well as patiently as he can manage, for you to gather some semblance of your bearings. However, a man can only handle so much. He's just as worn thin by your lack of intimacy as you are. He knows it's no one's fault, the responsibilities of being adults and parents have just taken priority but, it hasn't been easy for him either. Feeling and drinking in the sight of you cumming for him drives him to roll you onto your back. Your hazy eyes blink up at him as you attempt to piece together what's happening.

"Do you need a minute?" He asks, well, more like pants, into your ear. He's still slotted firmly inside of and his body practically shakes with how much he's holding himself back from pumping you full of his cum right now. Your higher order functions gradually come back to you, and you wrap your arms around him, pulling him closer to you before responding, "Hm, no. I'm okay."

That's seemingly all San needs because he hooks your legs over his elbows and starts to move. Given how long he's been holding out for, it's no surprise that his thrusts are merciless from the offset. The obscene sounds of skin slapping against skin and his heavy balls smacking your ass and, your intertwined moans ring out through your bedroom once again.

He looks so gorgeous with the way his hair sticks to his sweat forehead and his face is blissed out beyond belief. The slight burn in your thighs from the way he has you folded is worth it both because of how much he's enjoying himself and how deeply it pushes him. You doubt you can cum again so soon but, your weakly spasming walls still milk him for everything he's worth.

Based on the way his breathing increases and his grip on you is well beyond bruising coupled with his increasing moans and his precise thrusts morph into sloppy ones, he's close. The thought forces a whimper from you and your pussy clenches around him harder, "Are you going to cum for me, Sannie?" You moan directly into his ear. Your hands caressing his firm pecs and admiring them momentarily before circling his nipples. If your pussy wasn't being abused by him you'd giggle at the way he jolts, his hips jerking into you with every brush. A keen greeting your ears when you tug on them a little harder.

"I- I'm-" his words, or lack thereof, come out in a jumbled, throaty mess.

"Please? I want it so badly, baby," which isn't untrue, but you know the effect these words have on you like no other, "You're going to cum inside me, right?"

In the mess of words that you're able to register you can make out some mixture of your name, 'fuck', 'please' and 'yes' but, everything else is swallowed by his noises of pleasure as his cock throbs inside of you and ropes of his cum paint your waiting walls white. You don't think you'll ever tire of that feeling. Him pressed so close to and his lips brushing against your skin with every desperate noise that leaves his mouth while he rides out his release.

"San," you wheeze out, "San, baby, as much as I love you my thighs hurt."

"Oh shit, I'm so sorry," he says, unhooking your legs from his arms, and your muscles feel significantly less strained. You know the two of you need to start cleaning up, his cum is already starting to trickle out of you, and you definitely need to pee at some point, but you're far too comfortable and relaxed to find the desire to move a millimetre right now.

"I missed this," he mutters into your shoulder, pressing sporadic kisses to whatever skin he has access to.

"I missed this too," you whisper in response, if you speak any louder part of you is worried this'll be ruined. You pull him a little tighter to you, toying with the ends of his hair.

"If I'm being honest, I'm glad you're finished with your book for many reasons," you can hear the mischievous grin in his voice clear as day, "one of them being that I can now properly fuck my wife."

"You're so ridiculous," you laugh, but you don't disagree with his sentiment.

Reblogs are greatly appreciated.

Do not repost, edit, copy and/or translate my work. I do not give you my permission to do so, nor will you ever receive it.

[2smolbeans]

so because i wanted to hurt myself I read through a bunch of obey me replaced AU. And I kind of had a small realization. The mc. Are they not a ticking time bomb? Like literally because of everything that happened? Anyway I might be writing something with that premise and it turned into a Barbatos shipfic somehow.

Honestly, with all the replaced me aus I've read but also with the thought Mc is interacting with the most devious, influential, and dangerous sins since creation - yeah, Mc is a ticking time bomb.

Like, y'know the saying where once you start bad habits or go into crime, you build a path for yourself? It's exactly like that. I know, weird analogy, but here me out: (I'm gonna go on a ramble based on biblical terms)

Sin is already tempting. We are born into sin no matter what whether it is in our human nature or society. And once you go down that path of sin and the supernatural, it always comes back to haunt you no matter how hard you try to avoid it. Because sin is everywhere, and it's why people will turn to the Lord or good morals to avoid that sin. Now imagine being in an environment where sin is now face to face with you, talking to you with its strong presence, and you- talk to it back, interacting with the spiritual world. It's not something you can go back from, it's one of those things that will stick with you.

Now, if Mc didn't build a relationship with the seven deadly sins or didn't get close with them.. They wouldn't be a ticking time bomb. They could go back to earth without any of the brothers looking for them and return to a life of normalcy.

But because Mc built a very strong relationship, to the point they have the mark of the beast amongst other pacts and supernatural bindings with these demons.. It is a ticking time bomb. And it's even worse when in the replaced au, Mc gets used and tossed aside like tissue paper.

And because of what's happening to them.. Being treated like a servant, like a nobody, after being coddled by the highest of beings while seeing another person now getting that treatment.. While being in an unsupportive environment like hell. Yeah, it's only a matter of time Mc does something unforgiveable or loses their mind.

I don't know how to convey or explain this really well, but I feel like the brothers presence itself does something to peoples minds. When you're around something that is negative and influential, it can mess with you and not make you think straight. Also, if there are demons that mess with your sanity, if you look at them or mention their name- wouldn't the brothers who are the first fallen angels be under that category?

Maybe that's why they always have their human form and even when they are in their demon form.. It's not their true form because if Mc were to see it- they'd die or lose sanity.. It's kind of like seeing God's true form or Cthulhu.

I don't know, but those are my thoughts based on that! Also, good luck with the writing!! To have a realilty time demon like Barbatos with Mc with that premise sounds interesting!

.

.

[lucy90712]

Road to recovery- part 8

Masterlist

Part of me was hoping that the hate would slow down a bit but of course it didn't. Every time I checked any form of social media all I saw was people posting about how much they didn't like me and assuming that I'm only friends with Pablo to gain something. I thought I'd be able to handle the comments but I just can't there has been so many more than I thought there would be and people have said such hurtful things about my appearance and my character. Pablo keeps apologising and asking if I'm ok and I just keep telling him I'm fine which is a bit of a lie but I can tell he already feels bad enough I don't want to make him feel worse by telling him how I really feel. The worst part about it is that everyone seems to be drawing attention to the things I was already insecure about which hasn't helped my mental state at all.

Today though I have a chance to cheer myself up a bit as I have a big check up with my doctor to see how my recovery is progressing. I think it's going pretty good so hopefully he agrees and says something positive as that would really lift my spirits. I've been nervous about the appointment today as well which has really made the last few days even more challenging on my mental health but I'm trying to stay positive as I know wallowing in sadness and anxiety won't do me any good. 

Alonso came to pick me up a bit before my appointment; when I got in the car I expected him to tease me about everything that happened with the game this weekend but he didn't instead he asked if I was ok. I was going to lie to him too but because he's my brother he knows exactly when I'm lying so I had to tell him the truth. It was kind of nice to get all of my feelings off my chest and Alonso was really supportive and gave me some good advice. He's been through things like this before with getting hate for his performances out on track so he told me to just delete the apps off my phone for a bit that way I'm not tempted to look at what people are saying. In fact he stole my phone and did it for me as I think he knew I probably wouldn't do it myself. 

Once I had my phone back I went into the hospital on my own leaving Alonso to wait in the car for me. The wait for my appointment wasn't long at all and then I went in and was immediately taken for some new scans to see how everything was healing. After scans I was subjected to a load of tests on my range of movement, how much weight I could put on my leg and how much pain I was in. The testing was rigorous and honestly quite exhausting as it's been a long time since I've done this much movement with my knee but for the most part it felt good. After I had done everything the doctor left for a while to review it all and look at my scans which left me just staring at the wall hoping to hear good news. Just as I was daydreaming the door opened again and the doctor came back in, his expression was impossible to read which for some reason filled me with a few more nerves.

"Ok Lola things aren't progressing as we would like them too internally you aren't healing as quick as we thought you would and your movement isn't at the range we would expect it to be" he said 

"What does that mean?" I asked holding back tears 

"For now it doesn't mean too much this can happen as we can't always accurately predict how quickly people will recover but we will set another one of these appointments in a few weeks and if we aren't seeing improvement you may need a second surgery so that we can see what's going on" the doctor explained 

"Ok" was all I could manage to say 

"I know this isn't what you wanted to hear but don't let it discourage you if you keep working hard you won't need the surgery" he said 

We scheduled my next appointment and that was as long as I could hold it together. All of my emotions that I'd been holding onto for the last few days came out all at once, as soon as I left the hospital doors I burst into tears and I couldn't do anything to stop them. I made my way back to where Alonso parked but before I could get into the car Alonso had got out and wrapped me in his arms. He tried to get me to stop crying and tell him what was wrong but I just couldn't he tried everything to help me all of which had worked before but today nothing could stop me. Eventually he gave up and let me get in the car so we could go home because right now all I want is to just go home and get to grips with my emotions as I clearly have a lot to process. 

As much as my eyes were filled with tears I could tell that Alonso didn't take the turn to take me back to my place which meant he was going to take me somewhere in hopes of cheering me up. I really didn't want to go wherever it was he was planning to go but I was sobbing too much to tell him to take me home. We went a bit further before the car stopped and I looked round a bit as at first I didn't recognise where we were but then I saw Pablo's house and realised we were just down the street. I should've known Alonso was going to bring me here but this is the last place I want to be I don't want Pablo to see me like this. I knew we said we would help each other out but I know for a fact Pablo is doing better and I know he's in a better place mentally and I don't want to ruin that by projecting my problems onto him that wouldn't be fair. 

Alonso had to practically drag me out of the car and down the road which was rather easy for him as I'm not strong enough to put up too much of a fight. We walked down the street to Pablo's house where Alonso left me to ring the doorbell, part of me was hoping that he wouldn't be in even though he said he had no plans today. Of course after just a few seconds the door opened and I locked eyes with Pablo who straight away rushed over as quick as he could and wrapped me up in his arms. I wanted to stop crying but for some reason I only cried more once I was in Pablo's arms it was like he made me feel safe enough to truly let all of my feelings out. Pablo said a few words to my brother before taking me inside and allowing him to leave. 

Pablo took me to the sofa and allowed me to settle into his embrace with my head buried in his chest so he couldn't see my tear stained and probably red and puffy face. His hand was gently stroking my back trying to calm me down while he whispered comforting words in my ears. It wasn't anything special what he was doing but hearing his words and feeling his hands on me did wonders in helping calm my emotions which I didn't have any control over. As my tears began to slow down Pablo kept rubbing my back and he even wiped some of the tears from my face that he could reach as I was still hiding most of my face. I never would've thought he would be so good at comforting me I mean he's always so hyper and full of energy I never imagined that he'd be any good at keeping calm and radiating that onto others but clearly he is. Once I had completely stopped crying and my breathing was getting back to normal Pablo put a hand under my chin and got me to look at him.

"Can you tell me what's wrong I hate seeing you so upset and I want to help" he said 

"The doctor said my knee isn't healing properly and I might need another surgery if things don't get better" I said still sniffling slightly 

"I'm sorry that sounds awful but that's not the only thing on your mind is it" he probed further 

"No that's it" I lied 

"Don't lie to me please just tell me what's wrong I'll do whatever I can to help and I won't judge you you know that" he said 

Damn why doesn't he have to be able to read me like a book.

"Ok I've been getting a lot of hate since we were seen together at the game and it's been getting to me a bit I thought I could handle it as I'm used to criticism but I can't some people are just so mean" I admitted letting a few more tears fall 

"I knew it was getting to you people on social media are assholes because they don't feel the consequences of what they say but none of what they say is true" he said 

"But they keep talking about how I must be using you or how I don't deserve to even be friends with you which that part is kind of true" I rambled 

"No it's not true I can't even imagine what my life would be like without you I love spending time with you just because you aren't famous doesn't mean you don't deserve to be friends with me and despite what they say I know you aren't using me I know you would never do that" he said 

"And before you say anything all of the things they say about your appearance aren't true either you are beautiful inside and out and they are just jealous" he added 

Hearing him say that put a smile on my face. Pablo has never really complimented me before he's told me my outfit was cool a few times but he's never called me beautiful so hearing it made me feel a lot better about myself. He must've noticed that I was finally smiling again as he told me I looked pretty when I smiled which only made my cheeks heat up but luckily my face was already red from crying so Pablo probably wouldn't have noticed. Although I kind of wish he knew how he made me feel because as time goes on it's getting harder and harder to hide my true feelings from him. 

Pablo's POV

The pain in her eyes just shattered my heart. She's been my rock throughout every step of the way so far so to see her breakdown right in front of me really hurt. This whole time she's been the strong one never letting anything get to her but finally it's caught up with her and part of it's my fault because we got seen together at the game and now people are tearing her apart and one person can only handle so much. I feel so awful that I'm part of the reason she's so upset but knowing that I can be there for her and calm her down makes me feel a bit better. When she arrived she was hysterical and her brother told me he couldn't get a word out of her so he wanted me to try so that's what I did. I'm not very good at keeping myself calm at times let alone other people but I tried my best and after a while of just rubbing her back and whispering to her she calmed down. It felt good to be the one to help her because she's done so much for me that anything I can do to even remotely repay that I'll do in a heartbeat.

Hearing the way she criticised herself as well it pained me. She's the most beautiful and kind person I've ever met so to hear her say that she thought she didn't deserve to be friends with me hurt but what hurt more was to see that those horrible people got to her and made her feel insecure in herself. Throughout the time we've known each other I've always wanted to tell her just how beautiful she is but I've refrained as I know once I open the flood gates there's no going back. Once I start complimenting her I'm scared that I'll let my feelings show but today she needed it so I knew I had to take the risk. Seeing the smile that my compliments gave her made the risk feel worth it though as I'd do anything to keep her smiling 24/7.

Looking into her eyes as she smiled and blushed at my words made me feel some type of way. I've felt something for her since we first met and I've kept those feelings repressed until now but I don't know if I can do it any longer. She's just the most perfect girl I've ever met and I don't want to lose her whether that be to another guy or to the fear of what us being friends might mean for her. I have to tell her how I feel in hopes that as long as she feels the same way it gives her a reason to stick around even when things are tough like they are right now. As scary as it is I have to take the risk. 

[i-hug-exploder-shanks]

ficlet request: drifter telling a bar story from when he ran the end of the world bar at the bottom of felwinter peak - include as much gratuitous felwinter as you like - bonus points if he's telling the story to eris <3

This one got a little away from me. I rewrote it three times and just couldn't figure out what I wanted to do for it. I hope you enjoy anyway!

Sliding a filled glass down the counter Drifter leaned forward with a grin, surprised but not upset to see Eris had dropped by the Ether Tank. It was late and very few others were there at that hour but Saint-14 was sitting in a booth in a corner with his Warlock curled against him. Osiris looked like he had already had three drinks too many but Drifter wasn't about to tell him how to live his life.

He wasn't surprised given the date, he had been thinking of getting a little sloshed himself.

"Everyone has been rather morose today. Usually that's my job." Eris hummed making him laugh.

"Reading my mind? Its a good day to be sad on sunshine. It was years ago today that the Iron Lords failed their raid for SIVA." He hummed and she sipped the drink he had given her.

"I know the tale from Shaxx but had not known them myself. They were your friends?" She asked and he snorted.

"As much as you could be friends with someone like Lord Felwinter I suppose. He helped me take care of a few... Issues. I helped run the bar at the foot of his mountain and keep the Lords up top in touch with the lowly vassals below." He admitted starting to clean a class just to have something to do with his hands as he spoke.

"That's how I met the great phoenix Osiris too. Although he was less of a phoenix and more of a time bomb back then. Lit the place on fire quite a few times." He admitted.

"It happened twice! Twice! And the second time was your own fault!" Osiris cut in glaring at him and Drifter grinned.

"You're tempting a third tonight birdy. No Felwinter here to put out the flames either." He said and Osiris made to stand but Saint stopped him with a hand on his shoulder.

"We do not need a fight. I am here and can stop any flame that would spark up but Osiris is no longer a student either. He is much better versed in his light." He said and Drifter shrugged.

"If you say so. I have to admit the first time was a bit of a shock. I had heard of his visions but didn't realize how violent they were." He admitted and Osiris sighed rubbing his face tiredly before looking at Eris.

"I used to go into such deep traces that I lost control of my body and light. It's why I was seeking help from the Iron Lords in the first place. It's one thing to randomly combust out in the desert and another to do so in a dense wood or worse an occupied home. I knew I needed to master my abilities or they'd hurt more than just myself. Felwinter was a diligent teacher and a dear friend." He said seriously.

"He means that in the same way he and Saint are dear friends nowadays. The first time he lit the bar on fire might have been an accident because of a vision but the second time was because he drank half my store and started going on about wanting Lord Felwinter to step on him." Drifter laughed and Osiris groaned hiding his face in Saint's chest.

Eris hid her own smirk in her drink. "You had a thing for your teacher?" She asked honestly intrigued by the interplay. She also noted that Saint didn't seem surprised or bothered by the knowledge at all.

"You have not met Lord Felwinter. He was very charming. I had tea with him once when on his Peak bringing a request from my father. I think the reason so many people were so mad at him all the time was because of how tight his pants were and how he showed no interest in being helped out of them at all." Saint said shaking his head as Osiris actually laughed.

"That's not true. He just didn't feel urges for it like you or I. Warlord Shaxx certainly earned his interest and I certainly had to wash enough laundry while there to know he had to been doing something." Osiris said abd Eris tilted her head slightly.

"I thought that something would have been you? Didn't you admit to wanting him to step on you?" She asked looking back to Drifter who was smirking.

"There were huge pots around on which Iron Lords were with who. I was running them or I would have put my money in on Osiris and Felwinter being a set until Shaxx was dragged along. Then I wasn't so sure. But the way he reacted to Osiris' incident sealed the deal for me that they were something." He admitted.

Osiris looked at his empty glass and sighed. "Felwinter and I were partners at the time, yes but it wasn't exclusive. We both saw other people as well. However it was nice to have someone I could trust. I... I believed at the time he trusted me as well." He said and Saint pulled him against his side more tightly in a slight hug.

"He lied to everyone about Rasputin and it was clear he did so for your safety. I am certain he feared that telling you would bring you harm. I can not say I would do differently if I had been in his position. Having the Warmind as a father... Ha! Explains why he hit like a warsat! He was strong for a warlock. You are all so small with such little arms! You usually need your magics to get the better of a Titan but I saw him once punch Saladin's head right off! I think he was taking lessons from Shaxx." Saint laughed.

Eris finished her own drink and looked at Osiris finally deciding to be brave and ask her own question.

"Did you... See it?" She asked. The hive had their own forms of peering into the future and she trusted the divination she performed through it.

"Site 6? Yes. Many times. But not in enough detail to be certain. Still... I had my doubts. I confronted him about it and we argued. I told him even if I was wrong, if he left I would not be waiting for him when he returned. I understood the draw of SIVA but it just sounded too good to be true. Saint had offered me accommodations here in the city so I took him up on the offer. I only returned to the temple once to help Saladin lock everything up. I regret that the last of our time together was an argument but I don't regret my choice. Especially knowing that he knew about Rasputin." He admitted before they all sat in silence for a moment.

"You should take a bottle up to Shaxx for me when you head back to the tower. I would but.. well... The big guy kinda scares me." Drifter said holding out a bottle as Saint helped Osiris from their booth, the warlock wobbling a little.

"Shaxx is harmless as a kitten... If the kitten was a mountain lion kitten that could spit fire from it's mouth." Saint said cheerfully.

"We will do that. Good night Drifter. Good night Eris." Osiris said accepting the bottle and walking out arm and arm with his partner.

Eris finally turned back to Drifter and leaned her head on her palm. "Any other fun stories about the Iron Lords?" She asked and he grinned.

"For you sister? I have histories." He agreed and poured her another drink.

[angelsanarchy]

Alkaline: Euronymous x Y/N Series CH 22

Tagging: @ophelialaufey@madamemaximoff06@forever-not-gonna-sink@ajmiila02@liquidsmoothdomme@shady-the-simp @auggiethecreator @tempt-ress @blacksoul-27

Oystein was having a slow day. He was exhausted and annoyed but the moment the bell on the door sounded, he was ready to send Varg's groupies out of the door.

"If you're looking for Varg he's not-" Oystein looked up from the magazine he was reading and there she was. Y/n stood sheepishly, hands in her pockets and a nervous smile on her lips.

"Oh..hey...hey how- how are you?" Oystein stuttered as she approached the counter.

"I'm alright. I wanted to come by and thank you for the flowers...and food. It was really sweet and you didn't have to-

"Y/n...come on." Oystein shook his head letting her know that even if she despised him, he would have sent something.

"Your parents actually came by a few times. Your mom said you wanted to come by but you didn't want to upset me..." Oystein watch her fidget with her hands and could tell she was uncomfortable.

"Come to my office, we can talk for a minute." He extended his arm towards the door but she hesitated.

"Trust me, it's okay." Oystein added. She walked into his office and noticed the picture was gone and nowhere to be seen. She felt a small sense of ease as she sat in the chair in front of his desk and he pulled his chair to sit opposite her.

"Can you give this to your parents for me? It's a thank you from my family and I don't want to forget to give it to you." She handed the card to him and he took it.

"Yeah I'll get it to them." He nodded.

"I see you shaved your mustache." She gestures to his face and he smiles.

"Yeah well, I got some less than stellar reviews on it so I figured it had to go." Oystein gave a smile smirk and she nodded her head.

"Hey, I know this is super late and I don't deserve your consideration or forgiveness but I wanted you to know how insanely sorry I am for...everything. How I treat you, the things I did and said, how I was about Pelle...I didn't know about your brother but that's not an excuse for how I handled Pelle's death." Oystein spoke sincerely and Y/n could feel herself allowing his words to sink in.

"Honestly, you're probably the only person who knows what's going through my head right now. Finding Pelle like that...finding my brother...you feel gutted. Completely and utterly hollowed." Oystein carefully reached out and took her hand.

"Don't let that be what you hold of him. I've been fighting that in my fucked up brain since it happened. Remember your brother the way you loved him." Y/n nodded in agreeance.

"My aunt told me you called during Shiva." She sniffled and he rubbed his thumb under her eye to catch the tears.

"I wanted to be there for you so badly but I knew I had fucked things up so royally, I didn't want to make it worse. I didn't want you to feel like I was somehow rubbing it in or trying to cause you pain. I just...I want to fucking hug you so bad." Oystein explained. It hurt him to see her this hurt.

"I want that. I want to be able to feel safe and comforted in your arms but I can't ask you to be two people Oystein. I can't accept the way you portray yourself, I can't handle everything that comes with Euronymous." She explained sadly.

"You know who I am. I don't want to pretend losing Pelle didn't hurt anymore. I don't want to sit around and watch something that I created out of love turn into something that I hate. I've been pretending to be this shell of a human for so long trying to protect myself from my own pain that I forgot what it felt like to hear this music and truly connect. You were right, music doesn't have to be one thing. It can be universal." She smiled listening to Oystein talk. This was the guy she fell for. This is the one she missed terribly and wanted to spend every moment with. She never thought she would see him again but here her was.

"I can't believe you shaved it off. It truly was hideous though." She let got of his hand and ran her thumb over his upper lip.

"Yeah it didn't feel like me. This feels more my speed." He nodded knowing she was happy he had gotten rid of it.

"You also need to dye your roots." She ruffled his hair making him laugh out loud for what seemed like the first time in a long time.

"Well maybe you can come by my new place and help me with that." Oystein said it casually and Y/n bit her bottom lip.

"No bad behavior, just having a beer and dying my hair. Nothing crazy, I promise." Oystein held his hand up and she rolled her eyes.

"As if anything with you has ever been sane." She said checking her watch.

"I've got to get to work. Hammeed has been really cool about me being off so long, I don't want to be late." She stood up and Oystein walked her to the door.

"Oh hey I want you to have this." Oystein ran to his desk and tore a piece of paper off the notepad before writing his number on it.

"This is my number now. No roommates so if I don't answer, I'm probably here...you have the number here so..." She took it and looked at it as they walked out of the office.

"Oh look who it is. You know face fucking on company time reflects badly on the label. You should really stay focused on getting my record figured out." Varg said turning his nose up at Y/n.

"Are you friends with this guy now? I thought he was like stalking you guys?" Y/n asked not even bothering to speak to Varg.

"I'd watch my mouth if I were you. I follow no one. Clearly you need to catch up or fuck off." Varg stepped closer to Y/n and Oystein slid his body in front of her.

"Kristian, isn't it? You should really put something in place of your Scorpions patch. Your jacket looks a little naked." She laughed.

"It's Varg, Cunt."

"No one cares, Clown." Y/n didn't hesitate to fire back at Varg and Oystein was baffled at her bravery. He admired so many things about Y/n but one of his favorite things about her is that she didn't fear anything or anyone.

She put her hand on Oystein's back and squeezed his forearm with her other hand.

"I'll call you." She said sweetly. He gave her a nod and watched her walk towards the door.

"Oh good luck with the patch search, Larg!" She called out and before Varg could correct her, she shut the door in his face. He was fuming looking at Oystein before storming back down to join the others in the circle common area. Oystein couldn't help but feel like he got a little piece of himself back again.

[kermitmentality]

i’m so done honestly

i can feel that i am so close to getting bad again. i was weighed at the doctor yesterday and i think i’m at an all time high (altho i was wearing heavy clothing)

and i knew i gained some bc i told myself to not stress abt food and focus on exams but like. wow. i’m stressed now

today i monitored my eating more which is good. tomorrow morning i’ll work out.

but anyways i’ve been so tempted recently to hurt myse1f and i just feel like crying, i don’t want to talk to people some times, like more than normal. idk it’s been hard. i’m having weird and triggering dreams. i dislike how the school year will end and i’m embarrassed. i want to talk to someone about this but i can’t. i want my ed to spiral too but it won’t solve anything. i’m just done.

[littlesislovesyou]

The goal is ALWAYS to make you as feral as you make me feel, yes~ 😈 I'd love to see you squirming your thighs together in anticipation of what's to come as well knowing I'll be here to keep you safe! 💕

Maybe I need to put tape right over your lil cunt and write right above or on both sides of your thighs, "OFF LIMITS" As well as it being said in the ground rules. Your tight lil pussy is all mine and mine alone~ But they can have the rest. I think them ignoring your cunny and taking out their frustrations on the rest of your lewd body would just make you hornier anyway~ 🖤

Hey not everything has to be lewd. Or rather. It can be lewd mixed with affection too 🤭🔪perhaps I am both just as touch starved sexually and intimately that I want a bit of both always at all times lol. Like wanting to cuddle and hold you tight and then suddenly using your cunny in your sleep while covering you in hickies and kisses all over your body and holding your hand...having you sit on my face and kissing your pussy and making you cum all over my face while you cling to me tightly and then kissing you on the lips after~

Fuuuuck I do. This was a fact I suppressed even with past partners but I loveeee it. Wanting to get rough and the reaction to me getting a bit rougher...whining and crying and begging me to stop...(cnc) you relit that fire in me and I can't remove this from my brain's surface EVER again.

Mhm? I'll collar and leash you and carve my initials into you so everyone knows you're my pretty little fuckdoll. I own you, this pretty little pussy in between your legs? It's mine isn't it sweetheart? Giving it to me whenever I want with no hesitation and flashing me it constantly~ You fucking slut...you have no idea how much I want to pin you against the wall and remind you constantly who that pussy belongs to baby.

I hope everytime you see a dirty Tumblr post you think of us and I'll peruse your likes to know and think the exact same thing 💓

You are absolutely an irresistible, beautiful woman. Too much CHA (charisma) Pretty and tempting and flirty. Practically unstoppable until put in your place (being dominated and skullfucked until your brains empty and you're nothing but a bimbo fuckdoll) but my point still stands 😳 🤤

God kicking my feet to this one honestly<3333

I won’t, you know, be touching myself to the thought of that in a minute or anything like that 🥺🫣 ahhh just the thought of you taping it shut to everyone else because it’s just yours to use<3333 just your pretty cunny💕💕

Ah you know me so well already<3 I’d be dropping by the time the night was over, you’d easily be able to slide your cock inside of me after they were done💕☺️ just like you said in the previous ask;’) and actually I really love that🖤 it’s part of why I’m so addicted to your asks, you just as a whole make it a great experience, and I don’t want you to have to worry about going to far with them🫶🖤 you probably couldn’t say anything to me that would make me uncomfortable, but also just the fact you do that is so incredibly hottt, just adding that little hint of sweetness into it🩷

Also I completely understand why🖤 I’m in the same boat unfortunately, it’s half the reason I started the blog in the first place, but ahhh, god;’) I am honestly getting so wet right now<33 stop ah, just the idea of us cuddling naked and I’m sleeping next to you, and it would be just so easy for you to slip inside of me~ that you can’t resist it, leaving marks and kisses everywhere<3

I would absolutely sit on your face too;���) 💕💕 id like to see your face or your mask all wet from my cum honestly<3 just grinding my soft pussy against your face💕💕🫣

Ahh honestly I’m so glad I’ve been able to ignite that inside of you again;’) you seem to have a real passion for it hm 💕 I would just beg you so prettily to stop hurting me, and I bet you would absolutely love that~

Ah if anything I’m worse because it just turns me on, the thought of you getting hard and downright feral because I’m crying and begging you~💕 like I’ve said before it’s just such a primal feeling<3

Also stop it rn 😳💕💕💕 my pussy is gonna fall in love with you if you don’t<3333 god you know just what to say<3

Ahhhh 🫣 at least give me a pretty collar<3 put my name and yours on the back in case I get lost;’) also question is which part of me are you carving your initials into?🫶☺️ so many choices~

I wouldn’t mind being your pretty fuck doll🥺💕

Also you should;’)🖤🖤 you’re on my mind quite a bit when I see those posts 💕

[clangenrising]

AUGH I WAS PLAYING DND WHEN THE GOLDENSCORCH THING WAS POSTED AND I FINALLT FINISHED READING IT AND AHSHQJDNABAKDBABQKDBWBW SO MANY THOUGHTS

I’m very happy Scorch gave Goldie a list of boundaries, honestly she deserves to have a partner who will actually listen to those and not cross any lines

Them planning Razor’s death- PLEASE- please kill him. String him up to a tree and let everyone have a hit like a stinky terrible good for nothing piñata

Songdust is still MIA, which makes me both worried and excited. Excited cause I’m enthralled to see what’s planned for her and worried cause I don’t want her to die or get hurt (emotionally or physically). Leave the old woman alone

I know Goldie is bi (I believe you confirmed that in a Pride month post), but honestly her thoughts on why she hadn’t found a serious mate and- wouldn’t even do the more physical aspects of a relationship unless the other wanted gave me demi/ace vibes. I know a person can be bisexual and take things slow, no added labels needed- so apologies if that assumption came across as mean or anything

Tempted to see what Oddstripe has to say about the stretch beyond the border. I feel like we’ll see more of that (REDLEAF REDLEAF REDLEAF)

I’m just happy for GoldenScorch- they’re my girls and I love them. I shake them affectionately and then pat their heads. Both of them deserve good things

I love all of these thoughts!! It makes me so happy to see you guys care so much about the story.

As far as Goldie's sexuality, it was Scorch who was confirmed Bi in the pride art last year but she was mentiomed to have had a crush on Russetfrond when they were apprentices. Still, I do think reading her as Demi is a supported reading. Goldie is the most self-inserty of the cats and I would consider myself Demi or something (orientation can be confusing guys) so I think that attitude kind of bled over into her character ^w^

[medig]

"What's happening to me, I can't move my arms and legs!"

"Don't worry, we've just temporarily, mostly, paralyzed them for the duration of the experiment, for your own safety. Your ability to move will return in a couple of hours, and as you can probably tell, you will not be numb or lose any ability to feel sensations"

"If I can't move then why are you strapping me down?"

"Extra precaution, in case of any completely involuntary movements"

"What is all of this equipment for?"

"I'm going to be using all of these devices to stimulate the skin of your feet - your soles, your toes - and measure the strength of your reactions"

"Is.. it going to hurt?"

"Mostly no. But how ticklish would you say your feet are, on a scale of one to ten?”

“Oh I don’t know, maybe 7 or 8?”

(stroking her left sole) “Only 8?”

“Ah! No! I mean ten! Eleven!”

“I see. Well it is not going to hurt much but it is going to tickle. A lot. All of your secret tickle spots that nobody knows about will be discovered, and fully explored. It’s going to get intense”

"Okay, this is just getting too weird, I don't want to do this anymore!"

"I'm sorry, but you signed a legally binding contract"

"Look, I have money! I mean, my parents have money! I can pull some strings, get you whatever you want!"

"Ok, first thing, princess, I happen to know your parents have cut you off, why else would you volunteer for something like this? Secondly, what I want, is to do my job, which luckily for me happens to be to tickle your soft, pampered feet"

“Ugh you’re enjoying this a lot aren’t you?”

“Very much! Looking forward to it if I do say so myself”

"Well.. i can do other stuff. Can't we just fuck? I'll suck your cock! I'm good at it! Just leave my poor feet out of it!”

"That's a very intriguing offer, and honestly tempting, but we don't have time for that right now. Right now it’s time to tickle your helpless little bare feet until you scream.”

[pigeonwhumps]

Aftermath

Immortal Cannon Fodder masterlist

Taglist: @extrabitterbrain @wolfeyedwitch @painful-pooch @i-eat-worlds @a-funeral-romance @whumpinggrounds

Direct sequel to A Late Night Discovery by @i-eat-worlds, a crossover with their series Alex and Friends in which Joseph, their medic, finds Phoenix injured.

In this sequel, Aaron discovers more worrying things, and tries to take care of them.

2.7k

CWs: immortal whumpee, hero whump, abuse, mentioned child abuse, medical whump (past and current), painful wound care, being kicked out, team whump, fear of punishment, whumpee believing they're undeserving, low self-esteem, exhaustion, starvation, outcast whumpee

"You said you'd come to me if you were injured."

Phoenix cringes away from Aaron's disappointment. "I'm sorry, sir. I thought that, um, I could deal with it myself. It's not even bad."

"Hey. I'm not mad. But you've got a decent-sized gash on your side and you were going to attempt to treat it yourself. I suspect not too well either. Let me decide how bad your injuries are in future, alright?"

Phoenix nods. "What, um, what happens now? Am I free to go? It's really not that bad. It'll heal. I've had worse and, um, not gone to medbay."

"I don't want you heading back to your flat yet, not when there's a very real chance your teammates will make your injury worse. I estimate you'll be mostly healed by the end of my shift, and then you can go. Is that alright?"

Phoenix nods. It's unnecessary, but then so is a lot of what Aaron does for them. And Joseph too, apparently.

It's weird. They don't understand why Joseph's helping, he barely even knows them. But it makes them feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

"Thank you." Aaron squeezes their shoulder. "I'd better get back to work now. Please don't leave before I get back."

After Aaron's left, Phoenix curls up on the bed. The main problem with him visiting them when he's not busy is going to be fooling him into thinking they have somewhere to go. That won't be the case for months, if ever.

They spend most of the hours that Aaron's gone trying to think of an excuse to get them off their back so they can return to their hiding place in the corner of the supply cupboard. But it's... well. They have no idea what to say that would be convincing.

But if they don't... they've fucked up. They know they have. Indigo and Segun kicked them out, and they must've had a reason for it, even if they weren't exactly clear with Phoenix (and even if it is only temporarily). And now Aaron will be angry about it, and they don't think they can stand that.

They're starting to feel rather hungry. Maybe they can have a snack after Aaron discharges them. That's sort of the same way as their flat.

Well. It can be.

They could just leave now. They're tempted. But they promised Aaron they'd stay, and they can't break a promise. That would be worse.

Aaron returns several hours later, clean bandage in hand. He smiles tightly as he enters the treatment area.

"Okay Phoenix. I'm going to check your injury and then rebandage it. It might hurt a bit. Is that okay?"

"Yes, sir."

Aaron winces as they bend down beside them. "No need for all the sirs." Gently, oh so gently, they unwind the bandage around Phoenix's waist. Honestly, it's too gently, they don't deserve it. They don't understand why Aaron is being so, so gentle.

"It doesn't look too bad, it's starting to close. I'm going to touch it quickly to check for infection." Aaron's as good as his word, touching for a few seconds at most. "It doesn't feel hot, that's good. I think you're safe. Let me just rebandage it. Hold onto the bed if you need to."

Phoenix doesn't think they'll need to at first, it's not like it's that bad, they're hurt all the time without professional medical care, but the bandage pressing down hurts and they end up with the pillow in a white-knuckled grip.

Maybe it hurts more if they're professionals.

He's so gentle, but it still hurts. But then, the pain is only what they deserve, after all.

"There you go, kid. It should be finished healing sometime tomorrow. Are you in pain?"

Phoenix swallows. The honest answer is yes, but they deserve it. Aaron will try to give them painkillers if they say yes, and they don't need them. Those can go to other heroes who need them, who deserve them, because they certainly don't.

"I, um, don't need painkillers. I'm okay, really. Other, um, heroes deserve them more."

"That wasn't what I asked. But it still answers my question." He heads across the room and pops a couple of painkillers, handing them to Phoenix with a glass of water. "I want to make it absolutely clear, Phoenix. You deserve painkillers just as much as anyone else here, and anyone telling you otherwise is just manipulating you. We have plenty of medicine, we're not running short, and even if we were, that doesn't mean you wouldn't deserve them. Alright?"

Phoenix nods. They don't believe them, but they don't want to know what'll happen if they disagree.

Aaron nods. "Alright. Alright." He strokes their hair gently and they close their eyes involuntarily. They're so tired. Sleeping in a storage cupboard isn't exactly conducive to good rest.

"You're free to go now, if you like. There's no rush, but so long as you come back in the morning for a check-up I'll discharge you."

"Yes please." Phoenix hops off the table, overbalancing slightly and catching themself on Aaron's arm. It doesn't matter. If they leave now, alone, before Aaron has a chance to change their mind, maybe they can get to their cupboard without them finding out.

"Woah. Are you sure you're okay to go back on your own? You don't need me to walk you?"

Phoenix nods. "I'm fine. Thank you."

And they take the packet of painkillers that Aaron presses into their hand and walk out of the treatment area.

_

Aaron frowns after Phoenix as they exit the treatment area. They don't look well. The bags under their eyes are even more pronounced than normal, and that's saying something. And they look scared. They're stumbling into things, like they're going to collapse.

Aaron doesn't trust that they'll make it back to their flat alone.

He shouldn't, it's probably breaking their trust in some way, but he follows. And that... that isn't the direction of their flat.

He's not going to say anything. Not even going to approach, just keep an eye. But then Phoenix stumbles, and staggers, and trips into the wall, starting to slide down.

And Aaron runs. Fuck, no. They're not letting Phoenix hurt themself more.

They put an arm around their waist, lifting them upright. They'd rather carry them but they were so adamant about not wanting to be accompanied earlier, the least they can do is attempt to accommodate their wishes.

"Hey, hey. Easy. You're okay."

Phoenix shakes their head frantically. "No, no, please, I'm sorry. Just let me go, please, I didn't, um, mean to be an inconvenience, I'm sorry, don't, um, don't hurt me, don't punish me, I know I deserve it but please."

"Woah. Easy Phoenix. I'm not going to hurt you. Aside from anything else, it'd be a waste of my efforts in healing you, hmm? Come on, take a deep breath. That's it. I'll walk you back to your flat, yeah? Are you okay to do that?"

Phoenix sniffs. "I– I– I can't– I'm not allowed– please just– I don't–"

Their voice cracks and they break off, bursting into hoarse, racking sobs.

"Please."

They flinch as Aaron touches their shoulder, and he squeezes it once before letting go.

"What can't you do, Phoenix?"

"I can't– I'm not 'llowed– Indigo 'n' Segun kicked me out. 'Cos 'm useless and only Abbie's apprentice and they don't need to waste resources on me. Please, don't be angry, I'm sorry."

Aaron swallows down the instinctual rush of hot fury at that statement. "I would never be angry about that. Not at you, at any rate. It's not your fault they're unwilling to fulfill anything more than the exact wording of their contractual obligations. Hmm? Where are you staying at the moment?"

Phoenix eyes him warily, like they don't believe a word of it, and he tries not to feel hurt. This isn't about him.

"Storage– storage cupboard," they whisper. Aaron shakes their head.

"That won't do, especially now you're injured. Want to come stay with me instead?"

"I, um, don't deserve that."

Aaron raises an eyebrow. "You can't heal in a space as small as the cupboards you must be using."

"Can. Have. Lemme go."

"Let me take care of you."

"Don't need that. Can't pay you back for it. I'll mess up. Don't wanna... please."

"You don't need to pay. I'm just trying to help my friend. You. I mean, you can do some chores if you really want to, but it's not compulsory."

"Flatmates? Don't wanna make people angry."

"I don't have any. Medics have studio flats. Which you know, you've visited before. Let me help you. Please. I'll worry for ages if I don't."

"Shouldn't. 'm not worth it."

"Hey. I decide who's worth worrying about."

And he doesn't know why. Maybe it's the emotional side in him. Maybe it's the way they get so tearful, so disbelieving, whenever anyone's kind. How could anybody not want to comfort them?

"Can I give you a hug?"

Phoenix nods, looking startled. Aaron puts their arms around them properly, carefully, one wrapped fairly tightly around their shoulder. And Phoenix...

Phoenix crumbles. Leaning against their chest, head pressed against them, sobbing their heart out as they grip his scrubs like their life depends on it.

Maybe it does. Aaron wouldn't put anything past their team.

"Hey. Shh, you're okay, it's okay, you're safe. I won't let anyone hurt you. Just let it out, that's it, there you go, kid."

A nurse turns the corner into the corridor, immediately retracing her steps when she sees them. Aaron's grateful. Phoenix needs their privacy, even if it's hard to get here.

"Sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." They murmur it like a desperate litany, a prayer, and in response Aaron hugs them tighter.

"Let me help you. Please."

Phoenix looks up, confusion creasing their face. "You're, um, not going to give up, are you?"

"No. I'm not leaving you in a supply cupboard. Or anywhere else that you won't be taken care of. I'm off shift now, so I can do that."

"O-okay then, I guess. Where, um, where are you taking me?"

"To my flat. If that's okay. Can you walk?"

Phoenix nods and clears their throat, putting one foot down properly on the ground, preparing to stand.

And promptly starts to slide back down.

"And that's a no. Arms around my neck, there you go. When did you last eat a proper meal, kid? You're getting towards skin and bones."

"I, um, I had some biscuits yesterday. They were good biscuits! I had nowhere to get proper food from anyway!" they add defensively. Aaron tucks a lock of hair behind their ear, stifling a sigh.

"Cafeteria?"

Phoenix blinks up at them. "We have one of those?"

"Well, yes. Did no-one give you a tour?"

"Abbie said I didn't need one. That everything I could need was in the flat, and if I thought I needed anything else either I wasn't looking hard enough or I didn't need it. And it hurt when I asked for unnecessary things." Phoenix tucks their head in the crook of their neck. "'m sorry."

"Nothing to apologise for." Aaron doesn't know why they're surprised by anything Abbie and her team do anymore. Not giving Phoenix a chance to meet other heroes is the perfect way to keep them isolated and abuse them with no fuss or suspicion. And yet. "Once you're healed, fed and rested, I'm giving you a tour. You live here, you should see everything. Alright?"

Phoenix nods, already half-asleep. They must be exhausted.

"Good."

Aaron lifts them more steadily into his arms. "Where are your belongings? So I can fetch them after we've got you settled down."

"You, um, you don't have to do that. I'm fine."

"I know I don't. But I'm going to."

"Supply cupboard 14," they murmur.

"Thank you. You're not fine, though."

Phoenix makes a noise of disagreement and grips Aaron tighter as they pass a doorway. Aaron rubs their back, and it's not far before they reach his room. It's a struggle to unlock his door, and to be honest Phoenix's confused attempts at helping only make it worse, but eventually he makes it through, placing them on the bed. He gets some pyjamas out of the basket and folds them next to them.

"You don't have to change, but if you want to, there's some clothes here. I know you, you won't get any out yourself. Use the bathroom if you want too. I'll be back soon, okay?"

"Okay."

Aaron gives them a tight smile and heads back out to the medical corridors, trying to compose themself as they go. The worst part of all this is Phoenix's complete obliviousness to anything being wrong. And why would they think it was? Their whole life they've been abused, why would they think its continuation wasn't normal?

But they shouldn't, and he hates it.

They don't have many belongings, just a small rucksack which presumably isn't everything (and worrying bloody smudges on some of the shelving that he tries his best to ignore), and Aaron slings it onto their back, avoiding the no-doubt-curious doctors and nurses. Best fetch a snack while they're out too. A sandwich or cereal bar will do.

He pushes the door to his room open as silently as possible and heaves a quiet sigh. Phoenix, predictably, is on the floor, curled around their stomach. They haven't changed, or washed, or done anything except move somewhere very uncomfortable.

"Why?"

Phoenix flinches. "I, um, I don't want to make your flat dirty. I can use a bucket, I don't mind, really."

"Well I do. This was going to wait until your birthday, but I guess..." Aaron rummages around in a drawer and pulls out a folded green rough-ish fabric, with something like ears at the top. "Happy early birthday."

Phoenix frowns at it, visibly confused, and unfolds it like it's the most precious thing they've ever received.

"Is this... is it, um, is it a Yoda bath robe?" they ask quietly, astonished.

"Baby Yoda I think, technically."

"Grogu," corrects Phoenix absently, and Aaron feels a little relief that at least they feel relaxed enough to do that. "I've always wanted... thank you."

"That's okay. I bet you'll look adorable in it." He ruffles Phoenix's hair, and they pout. "Now. You have a wash, I'll help with the bandages, and then I've brought you something to eat. I know you're exhausted, but you'll pass out from hunger if you're not careful. And you're not sleeping on the floor."

"Can I, um, sleep on the sofa?"

"No," says Aaron flatly. "You're taking the bed."

"But, um, but I'll make your flat dirty. I'm not too bad, I can sleep on the sofa. Let me, um, sleep on the sofa."

"Not with those injuries, and that exhaustion."

"But, but once, um, I'm healed, I, um, I can?" they ask hopefully.

"Yep," lies Aaron. It's always polite to let the guest sleep on the bed, after all, especially when they've spent their life being abused by those who should be helping them. "But take the bed tonight."

"Where will you sleep though?"

Aaron shrugs. "The sofa. Or I can share the bed, it is massive after all. And you'd better sleep as much as you need to."

"Oh."

Phoenix doesn't seem to know what to say to that, as Aaron helps them to the bathroom. He's already planning. When they wake up, they'll take them on a tour. Most of the medical staff know Phoenix. Have guessed some of what's happening. They won't mind swapping a shift with him.

Some will, but they'll just have to deal. Aaron is going to take Phoenix on a tour as soon as they feel up to it, whatever anyone else thinks.

That ends up being two days later, after they've slept for close to 24 hours straight, and then rested reluctantly for another day. Aaron only just resists shaking them to ensure they're still alive.

They will be, though. They always are.

[thegamingcatmom]

Hi, it is me <3 I love the Tanya content but I am thirsty for some Irina stuff (can't help myself I have my fav sister :p)

I was wondering a few things bc I wanna know everything but I will settle for this:

How far Irina would go for you? And how affectionate is her? (Like does she like to cuddle, is she a touchy person? Idk all the sappy stuff, gimme gimme!)

Thank you ❤️❤️

Hellaw. 🫶🫶

(And that´s absolutely valid. ❤️)

How far Irina would go for you?

...

Stare at it all you want, it´s not gonna stop anytime soon.

I think the easier question here would be: How far wouldn´t she go?

It´s easy because the answer is simple: It doesn´t exist. The answer, I mean.

I don´t think words could express the love she feels, the things she´d do for you. Her love is timeless and all-encompassing. Tanya might have fallen first, but Irina fell the hardest. You know I consider her the most maternal of them, and you also know a mother´s love is considered the strongest of em all? Mix that with her undying love as your mate and you might be halfway there. Honestly.

When Irina loves, it´s with everything she´s got. She´s a romantic through and through, and although she might not be able to enjoy human things the way you do, that won´t stop her from going all out on it, regardless.

It doesn´t matter where you two are or what you´re doing - as long as she´s with you, it couldn´t be more perfect.

Irina the Romantic

She´s gonna arrange candle light dinners at your favorite spot high up in the mountains near a cliff that overlooks the whole of Denali national park. This is also where you shared your very first kiss.

Ye, all the way up there.

There´s trees surrounding the spot, which she´s decorated with fairy lights. She´s got patio heaters set up all around to make sure her little human mate will be all nice and cozy at all times - she ain´t taking any chances with accidently getting you sick. Then, she´ll serve you your favorite food, tell you stories about the old days or her further plans for the two of you, or just silly things to make you laugh. If you´re not busy holding your cutlery, she´ll be the one to occupy that space. With her own hand. Fitting like a puzzle piece.

She wants you to have the time of your life. <3

Irina the Caretaker

You´re feeling unwell or just having a really shitty day in general? Say no more-

She´s gonna run the two of you the best of baths, setting up candles all around - your favorite fragrance, ofc. There´s so much foam, it makes you feel like you´re floating on cloud nine. Depending on your well-being, she´ll have some snacks prepared for you as well - chocolate, fruit, crackers. You name it, you shall receive it. Ofc she´s got meds and the softest of tissues ready as well, should you require anything. She´s put on some nice music in the background, so soothing you almost fall asleep. However, she knows how much you love her singing voice. If that is what you wish, she´ll sing you the sweetest of lullabies.

She´s gonna be so very affectionate with you as well. Massaging those stiff shoulders, kissing along every inch she can reach, running her hands through your hair. She´s gonna take a bath sponge and run it along your arms, your back, down your belly, along your legs - so tender in her care for you. Ofc she´s also gonna wash your hair for you, she knows how much you enjoy that - mewling and purring for her like a kitten. ;3

She´ll do anything to make her babygirl feel better. <3

Irina the Protector

I mean-

I think that look says it all.

No matter if it´s some random ass person or the family - she´ll protect you and your honor at all costs. People get snappy with you, or downright hurt you with their words? She´s gonna rip into them (with words, ofc....she´s tempted, though), and she´s gonna make them regret they´ve opened their foul mouths in the first place. At some point, she´ll probs switch to Slovak in all her rage, not even realizing ppl don´t understand a word she says, lol. (She´s adorable.)

If all talking doesn´t help, she´ll simply throw them the deathliest of stares. That always works.

Okay, but what if it´s not just words anymore? What if someone actually put their hands on you?

Oh, oh boy, holy-

Dead. Or well on their way there, at least. Usually, she´s not one for drawing out the inevitable, but in this case she´ll make an exception. She´ll thoroughly enjoy making them suffer, just as they did you. She´ll enjoy every scream and whimper, until all that´s left is sweet, sweet silence.

She´ll make sure you´re far away first, though. Not because she thinks you might despise or fear her, but because she doesn´t wish to expose you to any sort of violent display. Not if she can help it. She doesn´t wish for you to suffer night terrors, and she also knows the view might be a bit too much for your sensitive stomach to handle.

However, you might just be able to convince her to show mercy...perhaps. If you ask nicely. Very nicely. >;3

I´m sorry for the late reply, but I hope this makes up for the wait a lil bit. <33

Thanks a lot for your ask. ❤️❤️

[yandere-sins]

Good Afternoon! If seen your spiels and tales for a while now and may I just say I adore it all, you’re quite talented in your work and you should be proud of yourself! I aspire to write as well and I’m wondering if you have some tips for the long run?

Hey!

Here are my latest posts with links to the ones where I actually went a bit more into details about what I recommend doing.

For the blog

For writing

Honestly, not much has changed, at least for me. It would be interesting to find out whether the tagging rules truly are still the same from the past but from recent experience I can tell you that posting regularly is the key to building a following. But at the same time I know now, more than ever, it's just not doable under normal life circumstances unless you find a rhythm to write and use the queue to schedule your posts.

If you want to write yandere stories specifically, personally, for me it's very important to be balanced. Like a super strong yandere is always cool, but it's cooler if they are so delusional that they will end up hurting their darling with their strength. Or a manipulative yandere is fun and tricky, but if it turns out they are deadly afraid of being left alone and are a bit pathetic about it, that's yummy! Also, depending on the darling, the yan's personality might change as well. I guess what I want to say, balance out the parts of the story to keep it more "realistic" and less Mary-Sue-Behavior. Not always possible or necessary because an OP yan has its benefits in certain situations, but it makes for a good story if there are some flaws in everything.

Also use the tropes. As harsh as it is, no idea of yours will ever be completely original. But I love retellings of ideas! And so do others! I don't care how many more times I read the same "chased by a monster only to be pinned down to the dirty ground" I will literally inhale these stories!!!! I love them!!! And you will put new words and new spins to it, so it will never feel dull!! So yeah, absolutely nothing wrong to lean into tropes and cliches. It might even be very beneficial for bringing your writing closer to people.

For warnings, I'd say, depending on if you do requests or your own work, always warn everything you find problematic in your own works before the story starts and add warnings if someone asks for them. For request, do the same if you derail from the original request too much to not warn (like, have sexual acts/gore/etc. suddenly even though it wasn't specifically requested). I'm not a fan of warning if the request is very clearly what the story will be, but do as you are comfortable. It's your blog. In the end, no one can tell you what to do, but of course don't be mean about it.

Doing requests is fine, but doing your own ideas is also fine. Of course, starting out with only your original ideas can be hard if you don't have a community built already, but you can always mix fanworks with OG writing. I know it's tempting to say "others do it too and they manage to just write their own things" or "I don't want to write for fandoms" but it will be very hard if you do. It's just the truth, tumblr isn't for original content in writing, it has always been for fandoms and blogging and art. It got better over the years but it still is.

Following up with this is: don't compare yourself to other writers/artists on here please, honestly, if you keep finding yourself discouraged by how much more likes and interactions they get, you should unfollow them. It's harsh. I love the stories and the writers of some blogs here, but I had to prioritize myself. Sometimes I sneak back to check out what I missed, but it will still get whiplash and compare myself.

In the same notion: If someone is mean or an idiot in your asks just block them and move on. Drama can entice people to interact with you, but it's not the kind of interactions you want constantly. And it honestly ruins you vibes if your blog becomes dramacentral. It's okay to speak out sometimes and make it clear that you don't want certain kinds of interactions, but feeding the trolls will only end in more and more and soon you feel bad and your followers feel bad, while the trolls are thriving. 9/10 cases it's just not worth it. Block and if it was a crossed boundary, let your people know afterwards unrelated to an ask.

And most importantly: pease just have fun. Put your ideas out there for the sole reason that no one will ever put them into your words the way you would. Of course it's impossible to ignore likes and interactions because it really does fuel the motivation. But I wish you two that you can create because it makes you happy. The rest will follow.