#i haven’t made one of these in a looooooong time

[ritelli-main]

I've always wanted to formally introduce myself. Hi, my name is Ritelli and I am a huge nerd.

If you haven't had enough of me yet you can also find me here: Instagram, Bluesky, Ko-fi (you can also find my commission sheets there)

[froggy-demon]

Oh, Deer - Part One

A/N: This is going to be a looooooong fic, slow burn AlastorxOC, this is just what I have so far. I haven’t liked how OOC Alastor has been written, so hopefully you enjoy :) Part one has one trigger warning: drugs + date r@pe drugs.

Fic Summary Part One: Lilly meets Angel Dust and after a few close encounters is recruited by him to move into the Hazbin Hotel.

Part Two

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“LILLY!” My head snapped around at the sound of Velvette’s voice calling my name from across the studio. I flashed a “sorry” look to the  background actor I was attempting to get the measurements of and went to Velvette’s side. 

“Yes Ma’am?” I asked, standing stiffly, anticipating whatever she needed done that would be too boring or annoying for her to do herself.

“I need that fucking idiot off of my set. Now.” She hissed, jabbing a finger out at the offending party. There was only one person Velvette let boil her blood like that, and I didn’t want to deal with them either.

“Yes Ma’am.”

She mumbled to herself, something about cry babies and professionalism and staying the hell away from her as she stomped off to yell at another assistant. I turned my head to fully size up the situation, across the large expanse of the studio sat Valentino on an over stuffed couch with a hand gripping the upper arm of a studio aid who looked like he did not want to be there. Valentino always has a knack for running anything that isn’t his production off course. I held my clip board a little tighter as I made my way over to him. It was always odd to deal with Valentino, if he is causing big disruptions Velvette will call in the big guns, Vox, but for minor disturbances she seems to have no problem making me try to deal with it. Valentino being bored and taking that out on our crew did not qualify as a Vox problem. The clicking of my kitten heals against the floor stopped as I found myself standing in front of Valentino now, though he had not looked up from his hostage. The studio aid had a nervous smile on as Valentino had not let up his grip on the demon at all and as ranting on about ‘loyalty’ and ‘being respectful’. As intimidating as an angry overlord may be, I am far more scared of an angry Velvette than Valentino. 

“Mr. Valentino, may I steal back my aid? I’m afraid he is imminently needed on set.” I said coolly, it’s best to not give him any emotion he can twist just to get a rise out of you. 

“But then who will keep me company? Plus we are having such a good of a time, get someone else to do his job!” Valentino snarled, looking up at me over his sunglasses.

“Allow me to double check sir.” I replied, rolling my eyes mentally. I made a show of looking at my clip board, tapping my fingers on it, flipping between pages and then sighed. “Mr. Valentino, sir, I’m so sorry it would appear that no one else can cover for him. Maybe I can find someone else to keep you company.” He gave a dramatic sigh and released the poor sinner who quickly got up and scurried away. 

“You can keep me company then since you’re clearly not busy today.” He said as he lit a cigarette and flashed me a toothy smile. Right, not busy, sure. I smoothed out my skirt a little, I knew I didn’t want much alone time with Valentino, but I also still needed to actually get him out of the studio and preferably with something to keep him out. 

“Ms. Velvette has asked me to escort you to your suite, or studio” Or anywhere, but here. I stated plainly, he frowned. 

“So that bitch just sent you to get rid of me? Fuck her! I can do whatever I want, I can go wherever I want, she cannot tell me what to do!” Valentino jumped to his feet and picked a vase up off the table and before I could protest, threw it at the wall in frustration. Standing he was more menacing, it felt as though he was nearly double my height now. He adjusted his large fur coat as he took some deep breaths, if I wasn’t obligated to follow the instructions given to me I would have been anywhere but here at this point. I did not want to be the next assistant he quite literally tore into to vent his anger with Velvette. Despite my anxiety, I stayed poised. 

“And, Sir, where is it that you would like to go?” I ask keeping my tone level. Instead of replying he starts furiously texting on his phone. Satan help the soul in the other end. After a few moments he seemed to give up the texting route as he shoved the phone back into his pocket. He looked back at me now and I attempted to not make eye contact, but also not look like I was trying to not make eye contact. 

“My suite. He should be there soon.” Valentino huffed and I nodded in response, allowing him to lead the way to an elevator that would presumably take us there. He looked back at me and as we reached the elevator placed a hand on the small of my back, a shiver ran up my spine. 

“You know Doll, I know you work for Velvette and everything, but this goody-two-shows, all-serious-business thing you have going on is quite…” he took a drag of his cigarette and then blew the smoke into my face. “...Profitable, if you’re ever looking to be bought out.” He flashed me another wide grin, like it was some great opportunity he was offering me to be a porn star instead of a wardrobe assistant. 

“I believe this is your floor, Sir.” I responded, avoiding the topic altogether as the elevator came to a stop. The doors opened straight to Valentino’s suite, it was massive as well of course, but laying on the largest couch in the room was a white spider demon who looked up at Valentino though his eyelashes and flashed a cheesy smile. 

“I didn’t realize you were bringing company, Val.” he teased and sat up. Valentino seemed very pleased to see him and strides across the room to meet him. 

“I was just ensuring Mr. Valentino got where he was going.” I turned to Valentino a bit, though he could no longer care less that I was here. “Thank you, Sir.” I added and stepped back into the elevator to return to work as moans start to fill the room. As soon as the elevator is back to Velvette’s studio I saw her with a line of models in front of her as she tore apart everything wrong with their hair, makeup, and outfits. Without casting a look my way she calls out, “LILLY! It’s about damn time, fucking hell!” And began listing off all of the things she had thought to tell me to do in the last 15 minutes. And so the day dragged on and on and on. 

By the end of my day I am exhausted and I have the choice between going back to my shitty apartment with my roommate who I honestly think is trying to poison me, or go out and drink that worry away. While my feet are tired of these shoes and I know my hair has seen better days, I’ll take alcohol poisoning over regular poisoning any day. I let my hair down and walk myself to a near by bar that I like, they have the best espresso martini on this side of hell by far. I sit at the bar and order exactly that when I catch a familiar shape out of the corner of my eye, it’s that spider demon that was with Val, small ring of hell I guess. He is sat laughing with a group of demons, I don’t give them much thought though because I hear a friendly voice come up behind me. 

“Lilly, sweetheart, fancy seeing you here!” I swiveled around to be face to face with a long time friend, Cherri. She flashed that trademark smile and I knew she was hatching some kind of an idea.

“Hey Cherri, didn’t expect to see you over on this side of hell, you usually prefer to kick it over in Pentagram City, what brings you out?” I offer her the seat next to me and she hops up crossing one leg over the other. She quickly flags the bartender and orders a double shot of tequila. 

“Oh just dropping in on an old mate of mine, have I ever introduced you two? You know HE knows how to party with me, maybe you could learn a thing or two Little Miss Lightweight!” She jokingly elbowed me in the side and I smiled and swatted her away. Cherri threw back her shot and ordered two more doubles, sliding one over to me “Join us?” Cherri got this glint in her eye and I knew that she had made up her mind: I was joining them. 

“You know I can’t keep up with you, not after dealing with Velvette all day and god the tantrum Valentino threw today-“ Cherri grabbed my shoulder and for a moment gave me a very serious sober look, she glanced around and then looked me in the eye again and very carefully told me, “look, absolutely no Valentino talk tonight, okay?” I nodded yes, a little taken aback. Cherri had never stopped me from ranting about work before, but I trust her judgment if it’s that serious. I downed my shot and grabbed my martini, Cherri already have three more doubles in her hands as she hopped down and sauntered over to the exact demon I had noticed a few minutes ago. I suppressed a smile, they looked like they went together. Cherri shooed away the demons at the table with him and he quirked an eyebrow up at me. 

“Aye, haven’t I seen you recently?” He asked as I slid in the booth next to Cherri, she passed out the shots. 

“Angie, this is Lilly. Lills, this is Angle Dust.” Cherri introduced us and Angel stuck out a free hand to shake mine which I accepted. I don’t love mixing work and fun. I don’t know about having a night out with someone else who works for the Vs…but if Cherri knows him he can’t be too bad, right? 

“I believe, we briefly met this afternoon, but let’s leave the work stuff at work.” I said and gave a small smile, taking my next shot.

“I cannot agree more!” Angel said and Cherri laughed. She pulled out 3 small bags with a couple of pills each and held them up for Angel. 

“I hope you don’t think we’re just taking shots all night!” She sang giving one to each of us. 

“You know,” Angel said, popping it in his mouth and washing it down with his tequila, “Val said you were a tight ass, what the fuck does he know!” Angle and Cherri laughed and I sipped my martini as the music playing blared in the background, seemingly getting louder. Tonight might actually not suck. 

And then I woke up. 

I rubbed my eyes awake, trying to take stock of myself and my surroundings, and retracing my steps. Cherri is next to me in bed, okay that’s a start. Is it my bed? Yes. Okay even better. Angel was nowhere to be seen though. Do I remember him leaving? Hell I don’t even remember leaving the bar myself. But I don’t feel horrific so, things could be worse. What time is it? 6am, perfect just in time for work, ugh. 

“Cherri-berry, I have to go to work,” I gently shook her to wake her up, brushing the hair out of her face. “I have to get dressed, if my roommate offers you ANYTHING do not take it, it is poison.” She groans to confirm she heard me and I set off to get my ass out the door on time. I rip off yesterday’s outfit and replace it with a black sleeveless dress with a high slit, run a brush through my hair, brush my teeth and gently shoo a groggy Cherri out the door while refusing the coffee being offered by my roommate. 

It felt like I had been through this day at work a million times. Sometimes all the little problems in productions and costuming just run together, it becomes mind numbing to distinguish between 666 News, whatever newest sitcom we’re running, daytime talk shows, and whatever trash Vox is pushing to melt the brains of sinners. While trying to track down the extra mannequins needed for the next lineup I was pleasantly surprised to see a white tuff of hair attached to some very long legs rounding the corner down the hall ahead of me, maybe he had a better idea of how last night went, or I could at least say it was nice to properly meet him while it’s just the two of us. 

“Angel Dust!” I called out and walked a little faster to catch up to him. “Hello! I just wanted to say-“ I stopped as soon as I rounded the corner, Angel wasn’t alone, Valentino was with him. Val had one arm wrapped around Angel’s shoulders and I think Valentino is one of the few demons that can manage to make Angle actually look small. They had stopped walking, Angle was still staring a head, unmoving, but Valentino was looking at me with an anger I couldn’t explain. A shiver run down my back and I found myself standing very still, I tried to remember not to show emotion, but it’s different when you’re caught by surprise. I didn’t want to be the first one to speak, but I also knew I shouldn’t leave until the silence was broken. 

“Aw c’mon Val, she must be a fan of mine.” He turned around and gave me that same toothy grin as yesterday with a hand on his hip and another twirling a stand of hair. “Tell me, Doll, what’s your favorite video of mine?” He teased. Val did not seem pleased yet though. 

“Aren’t you that bitch from yesterday? Unless you changed your mind about working for me, fuck off.” He growled, and Angel gave me a look that said that’s the best out I’m going to get. 

“Yes Sir, thank you.” I said with a slightly bowed head, I nodded to Angel and promptly turned around to find my way to anywhere but here. Note to self, try not to make an overlord your enemy. I trekked on to find my mannequins for Velvette and got on with my day.

I wanted to go home and curl up in bed, but if I did that I would only think about how utterly stupid I had been today with Angel and Valentino. Not only could I barely keep my cool, it was ridiculous to even try to say hi to Angel at work in the first place. Nope, I did not want to wallow in my own self pity and hatred at home all night. So I went out, hoping to find some club to lazily move though and let someone buy me one too many drinks until all the sudden it’s tomorrow and I can repeat the whole damn cycle again. I walked a few blocks before I finally found somewhere that looked right, Nightmare Nightclub, and once I was in I made my way up to the bar. I tried to flag the bartender, but she was quite busy. 

“You have such lovely hair, has anyone ever told you that?” I felt an arm snake around my waist as he said it, but I didn’t know that voice. I turned my head to see whoever this stranger is and was met with the sight of a red hell-borne with blue horns just a few inches longer than his hair, and a wide smirk. He wasn’t bad looking, but the night was juuust starting. 

“Y’know I don’t think they have,” I spun around in place so I was at least facing him as he held onto me. “You can tell me just what else looks lovely on me if you can get the bartender to put a drink in my hand.” I smiled and he seemed eager to take on the challenge, puffing up his chest and going to get the bartender’s attention. While he’s busy I scan the room, it’s mostly dance floor that’s hard to see too much though with the mass of people mixing with the low and colorful lights, then booths lining the wall for any interested in a less public place to talk. If it wasn’t proving so hard to get a drink myself I might have walked off in that moment, but I needed something to distract myself. 

“You didn’t say what to get so I figured we’d start off with something quick, a whiskey neat for the lady, and for me” he chuckled as he handed one of of the glasses, not my drink of choice, but that’s what I get I suppose. I knocked it back and set the glass back down on the bar just a step away. 

“Thank you, that’s the least horrible tasting whiskey I’ve ever had!” I smiled a little at my own joke as he drank his and set down his own glass. The demon placed his hands on my hips from behind me, I became suddenly aware of the sharp nails at the end of fingers, more like claws than hands.

“Why don’t you join me at our booth? I know some people who I think would like meeting you.” He said into my ear. Normally I’m more hesitant, but I let him walk me over to a booth far from the entrance and the dance floor, but at least it was a little quieter over here. When we got there there were 4 other similar looking demon men sitting there. “Gentlemen I’ve found a lady willing to keep us company, don’t scare her away.” He teased his friends as we sat down, one of them motioned to a passing waitress and she nodded, assumingely for drinks. “I’m so rude though, what was your name?” he asked me as the other man beside me put his arm over my shoulders and the original demon’s arm found its way back to my waist.

“Lillian, but please, I prefer Lilly, and you?” I asked him and then glanced at the others around the table. The waitress brought over a tray of drinks and some shots for the table and began setting them down. 

“Sebastian, these are just my friends that I’m out with tonight.” He slid a cocktail in front of me, “Another drink? Maybe this one will be a bit better than ‘least horrible’." He watched me try my drink and admittedly it was pretty good, some fruity mix. "Let me know when you want another, you're drinking on me tonight sweet stuff." That, I don't mind. He sipped his whiskey and began to fiddle with the hem of the slit on my dress.

I knew his game, get a couple drinks in me and then ditch his buddies so we can sneak off somewhere, that was also my game tonight. Still it's early, I should pace myself this drink must be pretty strong because I felt a little lightheaded already. I realized I needed to know how to make small talk, neither in life nor afterlife has that been my strong suit. "So, Sebastian, when you aren't buying overpriced drinks for girls what are you up to?" I teased, drinking some more.

He seems to think about it for a moment, maybe not everyone wants to talk about their job, or they don't have one to talk about. "Oh nothing too fun, I'd rather hear about you, I think this lot is tired of hearing me bitch about all the stupid fucks at work." He said earning a couple of laughs from the other demons. I glanced around the table and Sebastian pressed his claws into my side a little, not enough to hurt, but enough to say we wanted a response. He scooted my drink closer to me again, encouraging more. I finished what was left of my drink and more was ordered.

"I don't have time to get up to anything very interesting. I work for 666 News and the rest of the TV studio in wardrobe, or really as a task rabbit for whatever Velvette tells me to do." I say and the waitress brings over another round. Sebastian drums his fingers on me and flashes me another smile. There was a bit of ringing in my ears, maybe the music was too loud for me, but it felt far away.

"Well there are worst way to spend your days here I suppose, they haven't killed you yet so you can't be too shit at the job either!" He says and grabs my second drink from the demon with his arm over my shoulder and gives it to me. "You out here all alone tonight?"

I had to give it to him he was at least charming, scary, but charming. "Well-" I took a sip of my drink, but watched as Sebastian’s face fell into a scowl as he looked out of the booth before I could finish answer. My eyes went to meet what he was looking at, but my ears found it first. 

“There you are tuts! You promised to let me know if you were running off!” It was Angel, but why was Angel here? He looked at the demon with his arm firmly holding my waist, his eyes lacked their usual carefree spirit. “We were just headed out.” Angle Dust reached across the table to grab my wrist, but the two demons had a better grip on me and I was beginning to feel dizzy between my head and the lights. 

I blinked a couple of times trying to make sense of the situation.“Angel, yeah, we wanted some air. I want some air.” I looked back down at my drink and Angel slid it away from me with another arm. He leaned in close to Sebastian and whispered something I couldn’t hear. Sebastian begrudgingly released his grip on me and after a look his colleague did the same and Angel practically yanked me out of the booth. He kept one pair of hands on my shoulders leading me to the door and used the other set to keep people out of our way. 

“You got some self destructive tendencies babe I can tell yah that.” He chirped. I still didn’t feel any better than I had sitting down inside. 

“What can I say, I’m here for a reason.” But I felt far away, and really I was glad Angel was there. We made it outside and I think it is the only time I have been happy to breathe in the ‘fresh’ hell air. 

“Listen I may not know you well, or really even at all, but” he looked away from me, fiddling with his gloves a little. “you gotta be careful going out like that. I’ve seen that scenario play out a hundred times and let me tell yah, 5:1 is not a good ratio. I’ve seen that video babe, hell I’ve made that video. I wouldn’t recommend it.” Angel had one hand on my shoulder and I suddenly felt my face get warm with embarrassment and shame, but I could focus on his words less and less. “You gotta be aware, that guy he-“ 

I'm starting to think he put something in my drink.

I remember being outside and the club had been so hot that the regular air almost stung my skin like the cold. I remember standing up trying to listen to Angel, god he was saying something important too I really wanted to listen. And I remember that feeling of falling, like when you nearly fall asleep and your brain goes into free fall mode. For a second there isn’t really an up or down or left and right, just the air you’re moving through. Luckily I don’t actually remember hitting the ground, judging by my headache though I’d guess it was pretty hard. 

I open my eyes, but this time I’m not back in my room. Is this Angel’s place? It’s…nicer than I imagined. And bigger? I sit up from the couch that I’d been laid on, holding my head with one hand. Hopefully I only bumped the back of my head, Velvette would be pissed if I scratched up my face. Looking around the room, I’m in a library maybe more so a study. It’s me, the couch, a warm fireplace and whole walls of books. Interesting, Angel didn’t strike me as much of a reader. I swing my legs over the side of the couch getting ready to stand up, but my whole body begs me to stay down. I groan as my feet meet the cool floor. 

“Did I hear signs of life?” Thank goodness, Angel. He walked in and leaned down towards me, grabbing my face to make sure I looked alright. I grunted when he lifted my head back and he sighed. “Well you look alright, but you sound like you don’t feel great, huh?” He had this little ‘I-Told-You-So’ look and to be fair he was right. 

“Goodmorning to you too.” I pushed him back and stood up, stretching out the aches on my arms. “Is this your place?” I ask him rubbing the sleep from my eyes. He looks back to the open doorway and then closes the door, as if someone is listening. 

“Yes, and no, mostly no, but I live here!” He said excitedly. He sat me back down and paced in front of me. “So the hotel you see, which we’re in, let’s you stay for free so long as you are ‘working towards redemption’ or whatever!” He explained, using air quotes. Yeah that sounds too good to be true to me. I may be fresh, but it’s not my first day in hell. 

“Yeah and which overlord sold you THAT bullshit?” I crossed my arms, skeptical. Angel furrowed his brow and shook his head. 

“No overlord, it’s run by Charlie Morningstar, I don’t know if you’ve ever heard of her. She’s just the Princess of Hell!” That caught my attention. What does the princess care though? “She might be the only actually nice person in all of hell. The rest of the staff is slightly more rough, but not bad.” He sounded like he was building up to something, but how much bigger does ‘You crashed at the Princess of Hell’s place’ does it get? 

“Well I’m glad you’ve got a cool situation going with them, and thank you for looking out for me. You didn’t have to do that, especially since I pissed off Valentino.” Angel looked away from me at that, staring into the fire for a moment. 

“It’s no big deal.” He turned back to me with a wide smile. “My point was though, I was completely under Val’s thumb ‘til I moved in here. You seem to me to be under someone’s thumb too, I’m sure they’d be happy to have yah if you wanted to stay here.” He seemed surprisingly earnest. I mean I pay practically every penny I make to live in a rat infested apartment with someone who I’m pretty sure is trying to kill me, so at worst someone tries to kill me for free right? 

“I don’t know maybe-“

“DID I HEAR A YES?!!” The door flung open and a very smiley blonde stood in the middle, sporting a deep red suit, squealing with excitement. To the side was another demon with long grey hair, missing an eye, but she was focused on the blonde more so than me. 

Angel huffed and tried to shoo the two girls away “NO you did not, you are going to freak her out and scare her away, fuck off!” The Blonde bypassed him and strutted up to me on the couch and held out a hand for me to shake. 

“Pleased to meet you! I’m Charlie! This is my hotel, oh and that’s Vaggie, and you know Angel, and I’ll introduce you to everyone else in a moment, and I can give you the full tour, and we’ll find you a room! I’m so excited!” She grabbed my hands, positively giddy. Can you say no to the Princess of Hell? Would Lucifer swoop in and exterminate me himself? I glanced at the annoyed looking Angel who was staring down Charlie and I smiled.

“I’d love that, thank you.” I replied and she pulled me in for a bear hug, not my thing. She stood back up and smoothed out her suit and I stood too. The other girl, Vaggie it would seem, stepped further into the room and smiled, though it did not seem to come as naturally to her as it did Charlie. I forced myself to stand up and tried to smooth out my hair.

“We’re happy to have you, Angel said it’s Lilly right?” Vaggie asked and held Charlie’s free hand as Charlie had linked our arms. 

“Yes, I’m…happy to be here.” Angel gave me four thumbs up and Charlie lead us out of the room. She excitedly explained her plan, to teach sinners how to be better and get them to heaven in order to avoid extermination by ascending instead. We reached the foyer which lead to most of the main level rooms, and where it looked like she had gathered the rest of the hotel staff. 

“Lilly this is Niffty, our maid-“

“Reporting for duty!” And then she flung a dagger at a nearby roach with a menacing laugh.  

“Husk, the bartender-“

“Nice to meet you.” He did not look up from the glass he was cleaning and inspecting, but it was more than nothing. 

“And, uh-“

I felt a hand land on my shoulder and heard someone clear their throat directly behind me. “I’m Alastor, charmed to meet you!” His voice sounded like it came from somewhere entirely detached from his body, as if it was being filtered in some way. I flinched at the surprise contact and looked up at the demon responsible. 

He had the widest toothy grin I’d ever seen, but the smile didn’t reach his eyes, they carried a sinister look that felt like he was seeing every weak point of mine in that moment. His suit was similar to Charlie’s, though more refined. Really her suit was a less nice version of his. He took a step away, removing his hand and stood by Charlie’s side, smile never faltering. I knew that name, that voice was familiar, why can’t I place it?

“-The Hotel’s manager!” 

“Alastor is an overlord," Angel whispered in my ear "but he just got back from being missing, I can’t figure out his deal, but I thiink I’m wearing tall dark and handsome there down.” Angel threw a wink to Alastor. Of course, that voice. Who could forget his broadcasts, not that long ago it felt like. I can’t believe here he is just standing here, playing with the Princess of Hell. What the fuck is this place?

“Please to meet you all, I’m Lilly, thank you for letting me stay here.” I said keeping my even tone that I usually save for work. I don’t want to come off cold, but also I also can’t immediately be a target here. I mumbled chorus of ‘Hello’ and ‘whatever’ comes from the staff. 

“Okay babe, I think she gets the idea, let’s try not to overwhelm new guests.” Vaggie says to Charlie, giving her hand a squeeze. Charlie gives her a soft smile and then turns back to me. 

“Ooookayyy! You are welcome to find a room that can be yours and explore the place. If you get lost we are never too far away!” Charlie said and then Vaggie and her set off back to whatever they had been doing before I woke up. Husk sighed in relief and went back to straightening his bar, pouring himself a drink. Niffty scurried off presumably to stab more bugs. I turned to Angel, who I guess at this point is my new friend, and he seemed to know what I was thinking. 

“Yes there is a super fucking cute room across the hall from mine that you should take, I’ll show you the way!” Angel lead me up the grand staircase and we made our way up to the 6th floor. 

It was a lot to take in. Getting roofied, and now I live in Rainbow Hotel with Princess Sparkles and an incredibly murderous deer demon? Cool, that’s totally normal. 

“Angel, can I ask-“ I paused to wait for his confirmation. “-should I never say hello if I see you at work? Valentino seems particularly.. territorial over you. And frankly he is fucking intimidating as shit on his best days.”  I look at my feet as we walk down the hall and Angel doesn’t respond for a moment. 

“Yeah, it’s fucking stupid, but Val has a short temper so I tend to avoid it the best I can. That’s probably the only fucking thing that would make him happy, if he was the only demon in all of hell who got to talk to me.” Angel was pissed off, and he had every right to be. He took a couple deep breathes and smoothed his hair. “So that should work, don’t worry though, babe, that’s just work. Here are our rooms!” Angel beamed with pride at his bedroom door, it was decorated though mostly it looked like with notes from Charlie. He walked over to a blank door just a step across the hall for his long legs. “This one is yours!”

We walked in and it was more than my apartment was that’s for sure. Nothing fancy, a bed with white duvet and pillows, a dresser, and a desk with a lamp, but it was still more than enough. For the first time since arriving in hell I almost actually felt lucky. “Oh it’s perfect! This bed is twice the size of mine back home!” I flopped onto the bed and dust rose up around me, causing a coughing fit. “Okay maybe it needs a clean before it’s perfect perfect.” We both laughed and he walked towards the door. 

“Try to get some more sleep tonight, we’ll worry about how shit it looks tomorrow!” And he went back to his room across the hall. I tried to lay down, but my mind was racing and even though I knew I was alone it felt like I was being watched by an unseen party. I huffed and dragged myself back downstairs, to the bar, what are the odds Husk is still there? If he isn’t is it totally against the rules to get a drink myself? Luckily he was there and he rolled his eyes when he saw me.

“Haven’t you had enough tonight, given you were literally drugged just a few hours ago?” He asked dryly, folding his arms over his chest. I sat down on a barstool in front of him and waved off his question. 

“Oh please, I had one little sip that just put my out of it for a little bit. I’m fine now and looking for something to occupy my mind. Can I please have a drink, Sir?” I smiled unconvincingly, batting my eyelashes at him sarcastically. 

“Ah whatever.” he huffed and began mixing something up for me. I kicked my feet a little in the air as I waited. Why does he work here anyway? Clearly he doesn’t seem to like it. Husk sat the drink in front of me on the bar and I happily took a sip, admittedly this mystery concoction was pretty good. “Anything else you need from me tonight?” 

“Hmm, a vodka double shot to-go should have me set for the night.” He grabbed a second glass and poured exactly that for me. I traced the rim of my glass with one finger and decided to ask one last thing. “Hey I know it’s my first night and all, but…do you ever get the feeling someone is watching you around here?” 

Husk looked side to side and then nodded “it’s because you are. Alastor, he can move through shadows. He could be watching and listening from any dark spot here.” Then he raised his voice just a little. “Which is why I only say the mean things about you in my head!” Clearly directed to an eavesdropping Alastor. 

A chuckle came from the corner and out stepped the Radio Demon himself and his grand smile. “So you caught me! It’s always good to know who exactly you’re getting into bed with y’know! Or in this case in a hotel with!” He quipped, leaning on his cane. Husk wasn't kidding. Of all the rumors and stories I've heard about the Radio Demon shadow walking was not one of them, you would think that would be good to know.

“Well, Mr. Alastor, Sir, do you mind at least leaving me be while I try to sleep in my own room?” I asked allowing a hint of sarcasm to drip into my voice, making him laugh. He walked over to me and leaned down slightly so we were eye level. 

“I’m afraid I am not in the business of making promises that I cannot keep my dear!” He sounded cheerful still but I knew he was dead serious. “Also, ‘Mr. Alastor’ is so formal, we’re all friends here! Please, just call me Alastor, but you can keep the ‘Sir’ if you really want.” Husk rolled his eyes at the ‘all friends’ part, but I am still not going out of my way to anger an overlord, even one who did drop off the map for seven years.

“Oh, of course, yes, Sir. Just Alastor it is then.” I replied with a smile. I finished my cocktail and picked up my double shot, hopping down from my seat which put some needed space between me and Alastor. “Thanks for the company, but I think I should try to get a couple more hours of sleep tonight. I attempted to turn and walk away but Alastor appeared directly in front of me, blocking my path. 

“It might be best if I escort you up to your room, wouldn’t want you getting lost or anything happening to our new guest on your way there!” Alastor insisted, looking me in the eye. This wasn’t a request. I suppose it is natural he would feel a little protective of the hotel if he really does care about this, I’m some stranger who is moving in I wouldn’t trust me either. 

“Of course.” I say. He turns around and starts leading the way, humming to himself. We walk in silence to the elevator, the exhaustion of the night starts to set in and my headache comes back, I drink my to-go booze hoping to hell it will help. Once we’re in the elevator I lean against the wall a bit, Alastor raises an eyebrow at me. 

“Tired now are we? Not sure that liqueur is helping any.” He chuckled, eying me. I pushed myself up off the wall and stood up straight, smoothing out my dress.

“It’s been a long day, and an even longer night. I’m very much looking forward to a couple hours of actual rest.” I responded, watching the numbers tick up to the sixth floor. 

“Very well, sleep tight.” He told me with a gentle push to the opening elevator doors. I looked back into the elevator, but he was gone into the shadows. I just went to my room, tried to floof off as much dust as possible from the bed and got a good few hours of sleep, it felt like the first time in a hundred years I had gotten proper sleep. 

part two

[pewpewkachuuboo]

A little huskerdust drabble because I haven’t written in a looooooong time and this show makes me want to jump back in.

Only warning is language!

—

Angel Dust looked tired. His white fur was disheveled and matted in some places, the eyeliner he had worked so hard to make perfect and even that morning was smudged and runny, and his favorite pink jacket that was currently hanging on his shoulders as he walked onto the balcony of the hotel was tattered at the bottom and covered in different kinds of unidentifiable stains.

The rails of the balcony overlooking the promenade leading up to Hazbin Hotel were surprisingly and welcomingly cooling against Angel Dust’s forearms as he leaned against them. His top hands were haphazardly trying to work a bright pink zippo lighter while the other two hands and arms he had extended moved to bring his jacket more snugly against his shoulders to avoid the chill of the wind. An unlit cigarette sat between his lips as uncharacteristically as the strange chill that seemed to be lingering in the air of Pentagram City.

After a few more clicks of the lighter, Angel furrowed his eyebrows and cursed under his breath before throwing the useless item on the ground and taking the cigarette from his mouth, “Fuggin’ bullshit, man. I just need a smoke.”

He stared at the thinly rolled cigarette between his fingers for a moment before twirling it in irritation, “I can’t get one fuggin’ thing ta go my way - of fuggin’ course this motha fucka won’t light ta give me SOMETHING.”

“Does your accent get thicker when you get irritated?”

The gravely voice that Husker spoke with made Angel shiver, something he attempted to hide with a dramatic drop of his chin and an exasperated sigh, “What fuggin’ accent? I ain’t got no accent.”

Husker’s chuckle was just as deep as his speaking voice and Angel wished like hell it didn’t make his toes curl like that when he heard it - especially not right now. One of his favorite pass times was to fuck with Husk, and usually he’d try to come onto the demon to get a rise out of him, but he was too irritated and impatient to bother with him in this moment, “Ya need sumthin? Cus I’m not really in the mood ta play today, kitty cat.”

Husker’s paw lifted the discarded zippo from earlier into Angel’s peripheral vision and lit it with ease, his eyebrows raised in concern, “I figured when you didn’t stop at the bar that today was rougher than usual.”

Angel’s first instinct boiled with anger in his stomach - how dare this lighter just work out of nowhere for Husker and how dare Husker try to sound so casual in this moment - but he let the feeling simmer in favor of lighting his cigarette before taking a long drag and releasing the inhaled smoke with a deep sigh, “Ya looked busy with tall, dark, and creepy and I wasn’t going to sit down and listen to ya get bossed around after being around Valentino all fuggin’ day.”

Husker leaned against the railing beside Angel, his black fur tussling in the wind as he looked thoughtfully at the front gate to the hotel, “That bad, huh?”

Angel snorted before taking another drag from the cigarette.

“Can I help, somehow?” Angel Dust peered over to be met with those glowing, golden eyes of his that made Angel’s stomach tie itself in knots when he recognized the pure concern.

But he couldn’t let someone be nice to him because he didn’t deserve it, “Ya can fuck off.” He looked away after uttering the words coldly, trying to avoid feeling guilty for pushing someone away again.

He could feel the heat of Husk’s paw hesitating over his hand for a fleeting moment and then Husk cleared his throat, “No sexy requests? That’s not like you.”

Angel grunted in irritation, moving his hand to his head to rub his temple, “Ya not bein cute, Husk. Get lost.”

The silence hung between them heavily like a thick cloud of smoke. After a few beats, Husk held up his paws in defeat, “Alright, alright. But if you need a drink later, Alastor is gone for the night on errands and so I can keep it open a little bit later just for you if you’d like.”

Angel took another drag of his cigarette and waited in silence until he heard Husk make his way to the door, “Gimme a few hours - I need ta clean up.” He flicked the cigarette over the balcony and turned on his foot to follow Husk back inside.

Husk gave a lop sided smile, his fangs showing slightly, “I’ll have your drink ready.”

Angel waited for Husk to walk ahead of him to let a small smile creep onto his face, “Keep that energy up and I’ll tip you extra good tonight.”

Husk let out that laugh that made Angel’s limbs vibrate and walked away.

Maybe this day could end better than it started, at least.

[sohotthateveryonedied]

I’ve just seen a bunch of rants about people writing batfam that haven’t read the comics and getting stuff wrong and making them too nice to each other and stuff like that and I’m new to the fandom and haven’t written in a looooooong time so it made me anxious :/

Thank you for your words!!

-where did Tim live anon

the way i see it, comics have existed for decades and one person cannot possibly be expected to go through and read every single one. so if you want to botch a small detail or two, who cares? it's fanfiction. it's not real anyway

[zafirosreverie]

if you’re still taking requests could i request #8 or #9 with carla? 🥰

#9 is here ^ - ^ so i did #8 for you! I also combined it with this:

Hope you like it!

Grumpy prompt (closed)

Drinking night, crazy night (Carla x Fem!Reader)

a/n: this is looooooong. Sorry for that 😅

Warnings: Smut, alcohol mentions, Carla's dirty mouth. Dom!Carla...i think.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

You sighed and settled back in your seat, trying to be subtle enough not to attract Gwendolyn's attention and avoid her scolding. God, you hated these things, you hated being here. But what else could you do? You knew that if you had gone to Amy Mitchell's house, Gwendolyn would find out and she could do something terrible to your daughter. You would not allow the witch to get near your precious girl.

So here you were, in the middle of a huge house, surrounded by other moms who definitely didn't want to be here either, praying that the blonde woman in front of you would shut up soon.

"Y/N, Look at this" Cassandra, a mother whose son was in the same group as your daughter, whispered next to you.

You glanced at Gwendolyn quickly before looking at Cassandra's cell phone screen. It was a message from Janice.

Come to Amy's. We have shitty wine.

Followed by a selfie where the woman appeared, surrounded by other 3. They seemed happy and drunk. Lucky them.

"Let’s go" Cassandra whispered to you

"Are you crazy? If Gwendolyn finds out-"

"She won't" she interrupted you "besides, she can't do anything against everyone"

You frowned in confusion and looked around you. You noticed several moms silently slipping away. You smiled to yourself and turned back to Cassandra.

"We better go now that we can" she winked at you

There was no way you would directly face the blonde. Not if you could help it. You took your bag and smiled.

"Right behind you" you said.

You two held back your laughter as you sneaked out of the place. Whatever was going on at Amy Mitchell's house, it had to be so much better than this.

__________________

You were surprised when you arrived at the place. There were too many people here!! How many moms had sneaked out of Gwendolyn's house before you?! Too many in your opinion. How the hell had the blonde not noticed? You didn’t know or care.

Anyway, you were too busy dancing and screaming with the rest of the moms to care about those things. Tomorrow maybe you would, but right now, to hell with everything.

You heard someone yell loudly behind you and saw a row of moms taking a shot as a wild-haired woman yelled at them one by one.

"Drink!"

It looked fun.

___________________

Your head was starting to spin, but you were still sane enough to know what was going on around you. You watched from a few meters as the wild-haired woman laughed with two other women, kissing one of them and then making them kiss each other.

Pretty wild in your opinion. You liked it.

The more you looked at the woman, the more you tried to remember her. You were sure you ran into her a couple of times in the school parking lot, but her name escaped you.

Carolina? Carmen? Carola?

Something like that.

You turned around when you felt a hand on your forearm and Cassandra dragged you into the living room to dance. You missed the amused look that the blue-eyed woman gave you.

_____________________

You grunted when an elbow hit your rib. This is why you didn't go out to parties!...And because you had a daughter to take care of, but that wasn't the point.

You worked your way through the other moms and sighed when you walked back into the hall. You couldn't tell it was fresh air, but at least there weren't that many people here.

You leaned against the wall and closed your eyes for a moment, until you felt someone looking at you. You straightened up and looked next to you to find a pair of incredibly blue eyes looking at you.

The woman looked you up and down without shame, running her eyes all over your body. She took her time on your legs and you mentally thanked whatever god was listening for enlightening you and making you wear that dress.

She didn't say anything to you, but she had a funny smile on her lips. Shit, she was beautiful, you weren't going to deny it. And the image of her kissing that other mom hadn't left your head in the last hour.

"You like what you see?" you asked with a raised eyebrow.

Normally you would have blushed, but you blamed alcohol for your actions. Also, you weren't really expecting an answer.

Oh, but you got one.

The woman smiled at you and approached you with a confident stride, trapping you between her and the wall. You swallowed audibly. She smelled like she had a few too many drinks, but you guessed you weren't exactly better.

"That was my question" she told you "You haven't stopped looking at me since you arrived"

You frowned in confusion. What was she talking about? You didn't even know her name or who she was? Why would you -...but you did...

You looked at her when you walked into the house, when she had made all those moms drink a shot, when she had danced in the living room, when she had laughed with those women and kissed them. You had been looking at her all night. Shit.

"I'm sorry" you mumbled, smiling at yourself. Your confidence disappeared little by little "I didn't mean to be rude"

"You weren't" she told you. Her face was too close to yours and there was no indication that she planned to walk away "But I'm going to ask you for a favor."

"Of course" you nodded and smiled.

"That!" she growled she, making you jump a little "Please, stop smiling at me like that. I'm not sure what will happen if you keep doing that."

You blinked in surprise. Have you been smiling at her too? Hell, you really had to stop drinking. And yet you found her frown too cute.

"Why?" you said, smirking at her "does it make you nervous?"

You teased a bit and ran your tongue across your lower lip to moisten it. The woman in front of you grunted again and suddenly your back hit the wall hard. You didn't have time to react by the time her lips were pressed against yours. It was a hot, demanding and desperate kiss. You loved it.

You wrapped your arms around her neck and pulled her closer to you, returning the affection and pushing your tongue into her mouth. You could taste the alcohol in her tongue and something that was purely her.

You moaned against her mouth when you felt her hand climb up your thigh, lifting your dress little by little. Unfortunately, you weren't drunk enough to do it...not here.

"Wait" you said with a broken voice "we can't do this here"

"Come with me" she ordered, taking your hand and pulling you.

She led you upstairs, saying nothing. You were sure this wasn't her house, but that didn't seem to matter to her.

____________________

Well, at least she had the decency not to take you to her friend's bed.

You grunted when your back hit something. Maybe the wall, maybe a shelf, you weren't sure. It was hard to tell when everything in this damn closet was so dark.

"Are you sure your friend won't mind?" you asked, suddenly feeling nervous

"She won't find out" she assured you "Now strip" she said harshly.

"I don't even know your name" you said, trying to sound more confident than you were, but god, that tone had made your legs shake.

"Carla" she said simply "Now strip, I'm not going to repeat it again, Y/N"

Carla! That was the name that had escaped you all night. You were going to ask how she knew your name, but then you remembered that your kids went to the same school, damn it.

So you did what she told you and took your dress off quickly. Carla made a noise of satisfaction and you felt a hand caress your leg. The woman suddenly dug her nails into your inner thigh, making you gasp.

"Shut up" she growled "I haven't even started on you, save it for later"

You swallowed when you felt her press against you and one of her hands went down to holy ground. You bit your lip hard when one of her fingers caressed your already wet slit.

"My, my...You're so ready for me" she teased "No wonder you looked at me all night...you should have come to me earlier, honey, instead of showing your legs all over the house. trying to tempt me "

"I wasn't-" you tried to say, but she slammed her finger into you, making you scream.

"You were" she told you, nibbling on your lobe "but don't worry, you'll have what you want...you won't be able to walk after I'm done with you"

You had no doubt about that.

_______________

Your head hit the wall behind you, but you didn't care. You were too busy chasing the orgasm that she had been denied you times already.

"Please" you moaned "Please, please, please"

Carla smiled against your neck and moved her hand so that the three fingers that were inside you dug deeper. But the pleasure only lasted a few seconds because she yanked them out, just when you were almost there.

You grunted in pain and frustration. Your eyes stung with unshed tears. The older woman just laughed.

"Please" you sobbed "let me come, I need to come"

"Then you will have to work for it" she told you "On your knees, now"

You opened your eyes, but you could barely see her figure in front of you. Your legs were shaking, but you did as she commanded and knelt in front of her, groaning a little when your heel brushed against your center.

Carla quickly took off her pants and underwear, separating her legs right in front of you. She didn't have to tell you what to do, because the mere scent from her center drew you like a moth to the light.

The woman gasped a little as your hot tongue tentatively licked her slit and her fingers tangled in your hair to keep you in place. For a moment you were tempted to return her favor and play with her a bit, but she must have read your thoughts because she immediately reprimanded you.

"Don't even think about it princess" she growled "If you want to cum tonight you better start working"

She tugged on your hair tightly and that was enough to send an electric current to your already sore, wet core. So you got to work quickly.

Carla moaned as your tongue slipped in and out of her. Sometimes, you would suck hard on her tangle of nerves, making her jump a little. Little by little, you got braver and then your fingers entered the game.

You smiled against her when she moaned loudly as you shoved two fingers into her.

"Fuck" she growled "Don't you dare stop" she threatened

And you didn't. You continued your rhythm for a few more minutes, until you felt her tighten around your fingers and you knew she was close. You sucked hard on her center while twisting your fingers inside her and that was it.

Carla screamed loudly as waves of pleasure washed over her. Happily you helped her work it out. Her hand never left your head, though, and you found yourself cleaning up the mess that was coming out of her pussy.

"Good girl" she gasped when she calmed down a bit.

"Can I come now?" you asked.

"Stand up" she ordered and you happily obeyed

Carla pushed you against the wall again and kissed you fiercely, tasting herself in your mouth. Her fingers quickly found their way to your center again.

"I think you deserve a reward for being so good" she said and you trembled with excitement when she started pumping her fingers inside you.

You begged that this time she would let you finish.

_________________

You hurried out of the house, grateful to the one upstairs for the fact that most of the women were drunk and no one would see what a reeling mess you were.

You sighed when you got into your car and took a moment to recover. Your legs were weak and it hurt to sit. But you didn't regret it in the least. The best sex you've had in years since your divorce and it had been with a half-drunk mother from your daughter's school.

You laughed at it. That night, you couldn't help but dream with a pair of blue eyes.

__________________

"I made-out with so many women tonight" Carla said.

"I know" Amy laughed

Except no. The woman didn’t know what her friend had done in one of her closets and Carla intended to keep it that way. She couldn't help but think about the way you were walking when you left the house, anyone could see that you were in pain and that made her feel incredibly proud.

_________________

"Good morning" you greeted the woman after your daughter said goodbye and ran to school.

"Hey! What's up, pretty lady?" Carla smiled and walked towards you.

You blushed a little. You didn't expect her to get close to you, you just wanted to be nice. The truth is that you hadn’t been able to get her out of your mind all week, neither her nor her evil fingers.

"What are you going to do today?" she asked

"Oh...well...I don't have work today, so cleaning the house I guess" you said nervously.

"Do you mind if I go with you?" she said "Those two idiots over there plan to go to a sewing class and there is no way in the universe that you will see me there alive"

She pointed to Amy and Kiki talking a few meters behind. You laughed a bit and felt as if the air around you was no longer so thick.

"You can come" you said "But I don't know if you want to help me clean up"

"Oh no" she smiled at you "I was actually thinking of making more mess. I think we both deserve a second round, no alcohol and in bed" she winked at you.

You have never dragged someone into your car so quickly in your life.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

KH’s tags: @midnight-lestrange @emilyprentissslut @mochiadria

[danny-chase]

@karrya

“I couldn’t tell from your OP if you hate Jason or not. So I was scrolling through your blog, reading a lot of relatable batfam stuff, but still struggling to figure out your exact tone for Jason. In some posts it sounds like you’re cool with him, others you dislike him. So what exactly are your thoughts on Jason’s character? Does it depend on the comic/series?”

This is going to get way too long so I’ll add a cut to this one.

Right so my opinions on Jason are informed both by comics and fandom so I’ll do my best to separate them here. My opinions are subject to change, and quite frankly they change a lot, this is doing its best to be a comprehensive list of my current opinions. Be warned this is a literal essay on Jason Todd.

1) Canon - Robin Jason

Right so let’s start with the very beginning, Jason as a copy paste of Dick Grayson with strawberry blond hair. He was a cutie. I thought the blond hair was very funny. I adore the panel where Dick is like “i wanna adopt him” and Bruce is like “no me first”. 

Next up I read his appearances in The New Titans (or NTT - can’t remember which one he was in). They were pretty fun, he was a funky little guy and it was fun to see him interact with Dick’s friends (they’re all like please lead us and Jason is like... I’m 12, please get your crap together). These comics have Dick giving Jason his number and old costume and thanking him after the Brother Blood fiasco (I have no idea how much you know about NTT/NT, but Dick spent a looooooong time brainwashed and Jason helped save him and Raven).  

From here I read Death in the Family (I haven’t read any of the stories leading up to it though). Firstly I can’t believe he just up and flew to another continent by himself, like bruh, I’m in college I was so scared to like move to another place and live on my own during my summer internship I don’t know how the little guy did it. He is a bit impulsive in this arc - and I think that’s forgotten by a lot of the fandom - they retconned Jason’s character before his death to be impulsive/brash. Yes it’s 100% Sheilas and Jokers fault, and both Bruce and Jason make bad decisions. One bad decision shouldn’t condemn you to death - and I think it would be interesting if DC explored this idea more (instead of making it only about brash and impulsive Jason - that’s boring and victim blamey) that dying was an extremely disproportionate response. 

Think it of it this way, consider Jason found out his mother was alive, and telling no one, got on the plane, but then the plane crashed. It’s not Jason’s fault that the plane crashed, but Jason made the decision to get on the plane, and Bruce didn’t realize it. Unfortunately DC pretty much is incapable of nuance and hasn’t really handed the situation in a way I like.

2) Canon - Aftermath of death in the family

Jason is not brought up much in canon post Death in the Family, but the times he’s brought up it’s really interesting - as long as it doesn’t fall into the victim blaming mentality. 

First - an arc I like - Dick handling the fallout of Jason’s death. So in The New Titans, Dick returns from being on an off world mission with the Titans and Danny - a newer member had been looking through files and noticed Jason died. He tells Dick that Jason dies (very rudely). He confronts Bruce, and in an incredibly raw scene, is punched by Bruce and kicked out of the Manor (and unfairly blamed for Jason’s death). Dick’s upset to the point of going to therapy and actually fires Danny from the team because he can’t be responsible for someone Jason’s age.  He feels guilty about not being there for Jason, but overcomes this guilt in a Secret Files issue - he knows there was nothing he could have done. 

Later on the only times I can recall Jason being brought up with Dick are once in a fight between Tim and Dick where Dick says something along the lines of “You never have to worry about your safety with Bruce and I” and Tim responds with “Jason Todd”. The moment is kind of heart wrenching because you can see Dick just look so utterly devastated - you can tell how much he misses Jason. The other time is Last Laugh where Dick kills the Joker  (you can watch him snap in real time when joker invokes Jason’s name) and afterwards while beating himself up over the incident, he’s found looking at a bunch of photographs, one of which is labelled “Me and Jason”. There’s another time he’s passed out and hallucinates/dreams Jason who talks to him in a dreamscape, but I don’t rember details.

In Dick’s reaction to Jason’s death, you don’t see any (or maybe there is and I haven’t read the comic) of the victim blaming. It’s Dick’s stories so it’s mostly focused on Dick’s reactions rather than saying much about Jason. Dick takes responsibility (maybe a bit too much though) - he recognizes that he gave Jason his old costume - his seal of approval, and accepts his part of the blame. It’s a story about losing a loved one and never being able to properly say goodbye and dealing with the thoughts of “what if I had done something different” as well as having to deal with his grieving father not handling things well (i’m being generous with the phrasing). 

Now Bruce’s arc is different and it’s interesting to compare the two. Bruce starts working himself to death and becoming reckless after Jason dies. He doesn’t talk about it and has to be stopped by Dick and Tim from going down a self destructive path. What I think is really interesting is that Bruce was willing to take Tim in after Jason died. Because logically it just doesn’t make sense - and Bruce is grieving so it doesn’t have to be logical, but it’s interesting all the same. Why would Bruce take in another kid after Jason? This is something I wished was explored more.

There’s also the claim of “Bruce was only a bad dad after Jason died” which depending on the canon you use is or isn’t true. Robin Year One and Teen Titans Year One and Titans 1999 show him not being a great dad to Dick, but I do think it’s interesting to see how Bruce’s parenting was impacted after Jason died.

Bruce brings Jason up to Cass once as a reason for not letting her go out, and it’s very clear he sees Jason’s death as his failure (and naturally DC leans it into Jason being reckless/impulsive which is disappointing). Tim hallucinates Jason at one point who victim blames himself during the dream sequence. I see Cass’s relationship with dead!Jason more interesting because it shows the disparity between how much Bruce values Cass’s life with the amount Cass values her own life.

Opinions of Jason based on this era - overall it’s very interesting to see how different characters respond to his death, and when he’s brought up it’s generally pretty interesting to see how characters react. This can fall into victim blaming territory which isn’t great but it does tend to pique my curiosity about Jason’s early days and what things would have been like had he never died. I don’t like some of the retcons made during this era with Jason being shown occasionally in flashbacks.

3) Canon - UTRH, PreNew 52

The villain Jason era. Under the Red Hood was pretty meh in my opinion, and I would have liked him to have been revealed as the true identity of Hush instead. I guess I just like Hush as a story better, and it was kind of anticlimactic to see him be revealed in UTRH after the Hush tease. 

I read the one Titans Tower issue and was kind of underwhelmed. But Jason dressing up as Robin was pretty iconic and he made for a pretty terrifying and ruthless villain here. 

I read the Brother’s in Blood arc and Jason as a villain in that was pretty weird/funny. This is tentacle jason so like... idk what anyone expects me to say about it. I thought it was hilarious and a funny arc. His dynamic with Dick is also kind of funny (i don’t like Dick’s characterization in the 1 year later comics though), but it’s really funny that Jason dressed up as Nightwing and ran around killing people to fuck with Dick. And then kept calling him Dickie and harrassed him. In conclusion I think this jason was funny, I kind of wish there was more because I thought the arc was hilarious.

Battle for the Cowl Jason - this Jason was a terrifyingly competent villain capable of hacking his way past the batfamily’s sensors and invading the batcave. He was also ruthless, nearly killing both Damian and Tim. He even sprayed Dick with fear gas during their fight and fell off a bridge afterwards to make a point. His costume was on point imo, while most people take this entire thing as not being in character for Jason, I actually despite all odds like him in this comic. He was dramatic. Unapologetically evil. Incredibly deadly. He seemed like he was being set up as a villain on Dick’s level and I was interested in seeing how this would be resolved.

Batman and Robin 2009 Jason. Ah. How Battle of the Cowl Jason was resolved. I liked the red hair coming back (yes i know i’m weird) but I thought him dying his hair as a child was a fun bit of backstory drama. He had pimples which was eh? Condom head costume was... sigh. I wish he kept the scary batman suit. It seemed like he was kind of there to laugh at. Also him having a child sidekick and then calling Dick out for having a child sidekick was... LMAO. Anyways this Jason ends up in Arkham after Arkham was renovated into being like... actually kind of nice and I wish canon had expanded on that more, because it would have been interesting seeing Jason in therapy sessions (and maybe Dick, Tim, and Damian visiting) but instead he just switched to Black Gate because Bruce is dumb and ended up killing 80 people. Thanks DC.

So anyways. I liked Jason as a villain most of the time. I thought he made an interesting character as a villain, I don’t think he had a moral code, I think he was just selfish and angry and honestly? I liked him like that. He was dramatic - you knew he could put up a good fight, and he could keep pace as he was on the same level or above the heroes he was fighting. He was unpredictable - kept you guessing, and you could never be quite sure how the fight would end. Unfortunately his character was no where near consistent, with morrison’s Jason being (unsurprisingly) particularly bad.

4) Canon - New52

I read RHATO 2011. I hated it. There was no plot. Jason was a generic sad boi that I really didn’t care about. And it destroyed two characters that I like: Roy and Kory (Titans 2008 had started the job but ohhh boy did RHATO finish it). I hate the retcons made to Roy’s character - I hate that Kory’s only there to be a sex object, and it makes me resentful of Jason as a character that the others were used to prop him up.

Jason was also just... generic in this. Like he reminds me of every angsty boy I knew/know in high school/college. The entire series fell flat for me and turned me off of Jason content for a bit - hence why I haven’t read Rebirth RHATO.

I have read Robin War, Batman Eternal, and Batman and Robin Eternal, all of which include Jason. Robin War and Batman and Robin Eternal were both bad imo, the characterizations were flat and for some reason Tim and Jason are besties for no reason, with no build up. Iirc Batman Eternal has Barbara retconned into telling Jason something like “you’ll never be Dick Grayson” or something and I think this storyline of people being retconned into hating baby jason for being rash and impuslive is dumb af and lessens the tragedy of his death and makes characters I like seem shitty for no reason. Hence, I didn’t like Jason in any of these, or at the best, was indifferent.

5) Canon - Now (Robins, Robin, Urban Legends)

I think it’s dumb. I think Jason being the most emotional one in this way is dumb. I think him giving up guns is boring. I think him hugging Damian was fanservicy and literally just made Jason look stupid. I think current Jason is stupid. It seems like the Robins in general are suffering from standing too close to the kid genius that is Tim Drake (which i think is stupid) and losing all their brain cells. Everything I’ve seen Jason in recently has been one dimensional and boring and it’s kind of neat that Jason’s utopia is everyone being together and happy but I don’t want to see that become a reality in comics because I like messy Batfamily drama. I thought the plotline where he adopted Tyler for a bit had potential (especially in making Jason reflect on his morals) but I never finished it because I lost track of it amongst all the comics coming out. 

WFA Jason full-body tackled a 9 year old for a cookie and I can respect that. 

6) Fanon

I’ll state right now that horny/hot Jason art doesn’t pique my interest. I don’t think he’s hot. I don’t really think men are hot (ironic, I know, considering I’m a Dick Grayson fan). That part of the fandom doesn’t interest me.

The pit mad headcanon - I hate it. It often comes off as people being like I want to justify everything Jason’s done, therefore he was “pit mad”. This post sums up why I don’t like it. 

Feminist Jason. I don’t like it. It comes across as “extrajudicial murder is feminist, actually” and I just don’t know where it comes from (and every single time it boils down to he reads Jane Austen like I get it)? It seems like part of the fandom wants Jason to be super progressive, while keeping his murdering criminals way of thinking and just like no??? Murdering people who’ve committed crimes (even the “worst crimes”, yes) is not progressive and tbh it worries me that some people think this way. It also sometimes comes off as, Jason must be feminist/progressive because he grew up poor in a bad part of town and was homeless. And that’s just not how people work? His world view would be impacted by his childhood, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that he would grow up to be progressive.

The “Jason’s moral code is justifiable” arguments don’t sit right with me because it sounds like Punisher rhetoric, and it sounds like y’all condone murder sometimes and that ain’t it. Nope it doesn’t make it better if its only “drug dealers, abusers, and rapists” Jason is human, fallible, and has not only targeted these groups in canon (he tried to kill tim and damian remember?). Besides that I kind of like... believe in human rights, and yes those rights apply to criminals. But y’all can call me out as an idealist, and I’ll just call you brainwashed by crime and punishment rhetoric.

Jason as part of the batfam. His relationship with Dick (WHEN NOT INCEST) is the most interesting to me, and the relationship I think has the most potential - Dick’s killed the joker which is something Bruce never did, and Dick and Jason were chill when Jason was younger which could be fun (sometimes I dream of an AU where Dick adopted Jason and co-raised him with the Titans). But mostly fanon seems interested in portraying Dick as a bad big brother to Jason and I’m not interested - why would I read stuff that trashes one of my faves without any basis in canon? I find the stuff with Tim kind of boring because I’m not really interested in Tim and I’m petty so I resent the New52 for making Tim and Jason close at the expense of Dick and Tim’s relationship. I also am not interested because half the time it’s just Tim fans trashing Dick with no basis in canon or demonizing Damian for trying to kill Tim despite Jason who tried 4 times to kill Tim being completely forgiven. Anytime I’ve seen Cass in a fic with Jason, she’s so ooc it hurts because imo her Batgirl run is soooo much better - not just better than Jason’s but better than like every comic I’ve read. I’ve seen some people ship Steph and Jason and i’m really not interested. I’m also not interested in Jason in relation to Damian because it comes off as weird seeing as they don’t really have a relationship in canon/Damian’s not really a fan of Jason. Duke deserves more content and could potentially have some fun interactions with Jason but I don’t know if I trust people to write Duke after seeing how Cass gets written when Jason’s around. Barbara and Jason I think also has potential as an interesting relationship, but i do not give one crap about able bodied Babs, or Jasonbabs 

My own fanon Jason Todd that I’ve included in some of my writing is generally just me having no idea wtf to do with him and working off of some of the better fics I’ve seen him appear in. He’s kind of frustrating for me to write because I have almost nothing but fanon to work off of, and I genuinely don’t really know how he would react in a lot of circumstances. I might start writing him as a villain eventually, because despite everything, I’ve kinda warmed up to villainous Jason. 

TL;DR

A lot of my dislike of Jason boils down to - he literally sucks the personality of everyone. It seems like writers tend to make the characters he’s with less interesting to prop up Jason and those happen to be characters that I like. Another petty dislike it seems like writers are just trying to make him Dick Grayson 2.0 and I like Dick Grayson, I like DickRoy, I like Dick and Tim’s relationship, and it seems like DC just gave Jason connections with these characters without any build up, and took them away from Dick for no reason.

What I like about Jason is his time as Robin and his time as a villain. I might just have bad tastes (true statement) but I thought he was more fun as a villain - he was someone that knew all their methods and how they think which made him a unique opponent. There was the dramatic irony of Jason not knowing the Joker was killed (somewhat over him). There was Jason being the most dramatic villain ever to the point of dressing up in the Robin, Nightwing, and Batman costumes to make a point. To the point of falling off a bridge to make a point! He was so dramatic and the family drama was juicy and I was so there for the tea.

[findingjoynweirdstuff]

A comprehensive guide for whose streams to watch for Dream SMP plot if you’re overwhelmed

By now everyone’s probably figured out that there is a LOT of content out there on Twitch about the Dream SMP, and if you’re new to the fanbase it’s probably super overwhelming to figure out how to keep up with it all. 

So I’ve decided to make a guide of who streams, and who usually has “plot stuff” to keep up with, vs. more chill vibes, since it may be helpful to some people? Maybe??

More under the cut: 

I wanna be clear, this is all based on my personal gathering of it, and even if you’re only invested in the “plot stuff,” so to speak, I’d still highly recommend giving the more Chill Vibes-focused streamers a try if you have the time! This is mostly for people who are getting started and don’t know who to follow along with, or where all of this plot stuff is even coming from, anyway. I’m probably missing a lot too, since I can’t keep up with everything either (honestly, who could)

So, let’s get to it! And I wanna reiterate, I am NOT saying “more plot stuff” = better. This is not some sort of tier list. Just a guide. Also I am probably forgetting people, so I apologize in advance! I just hope this helps somebody.

First off: Almost Always Plot Stuff

- Wilbur: The dude’s first stream on the SMP was the start of L’manberg. What more can I say? He doesn’t really do grinding for items streams or building streams, and he keeps them very short. The streams are quite rare because of this. If you only keep up with Wilbur and no one else, though, you may end up missing some important events like the Battle of the Lake and the Pet War. 

A lot of Plot Stuff, and when not, Hijinks 

- Tommy: Yeah, everyone considers him the “main character” at this point. It kinda goes without saying

- Quackity: If you wanna see the “villain’s POV” of the whole Schlatt plot, so to speak. Even now that he’s on Pogtopia’s side, he still has streams with Dream and Schlatt, so you’re still getting that perspective on things. Also did the whole cartel thing with Tommy, and was of course running for president as well. 

Sometimes Plot Stuff (and a lot of fun)

- Fundy: Watch the Pet War!! Drama and heartbreak!! Fundy’s big into pranks. He also did the whole secret diary thing. And sometimes those pranks become very plot-relevant, such as the Pogtopia Buttons. Always a joy! He’s very underappreciated. Currently involved with the Dreamon plot

- Tubbo: Sometimes he gets up to hijinks with Tommy, other times he does building, like his current project to Drain the Ocean. And of course, when the big Plot Days come around, he plays a big part. Currently involved with the Dreamon plot

- Ironically, Karl?? Sure he hasn’t gotten himself into any animatics, but Wilbur was straight up about to blow up Manberg on his stream. Plus him and Sapnap/him and Quackity make for iconic duos. A lot of musical fun! Seriously, if you want a canon Dream SMP Musical, this is the closest you’ll get.

- Technoblade: A lot of grinding for weapons of course, but also there for the Big Days. Whenever he uploads once in a blue moon, a puppy angel gets its wings

- Niki: Also there for the big days! I haven’t been keeping up with her streams as much but she also seems to be building a secret city, from what I’ve heard?

Building/grinding and Chill Vibes

- Eret: L’manberg’s primary builder, king of the Dream SMP faction, currently working on a badass museum. Very LGBT friendly, honestly just a nice and chill time

- Ponk: Ponk always has a cool project going on. Underrated builds, one of the OG Eight. The burning of his Lemon Tree was an event that led to the start of the original Disc War. Will the Lemon Trees ever be truly safe? Only time will tell

- HBomb: Made the Leap of Faith, just a nice guy all around, terrorized Fundy and Quackity with a maid outfit

- Awesamdude: Redstone skills off the charts. Seriously wtf. Helping Tubbo drain the ocean. If you’re wondering about the Badlands as well, that’s Sam, Bad and Antfrost. One of the OG Eight who made a recent return to the server after a looooooong absence. He streams now!

- Antfrost: Currently working on an animal sanctuary, I believe? Part of the Badlands. His very first stream was for Taco Bell. Good times, good times.

- Badboyhalo: Makes some very cute statues. A great muffin! Part of the Badlands. One of the OG Eight.

- Purpled: Very recently returned, working on a new base I think? Preparing for war

- Thunder1408: Also very recently returned, so I’m not sure yet. Way back when, though, he was working on that giant floating Tesco’s in the sky above Purpled’s Walmart. Very underrated! 

- Punz: Doesn’t stream as much on the SMP these days, but has recently been trying to get a trident. I’m not sure if he ever found one? Someone remind me. Also was involved in the Pet War! RIP Beenis

The Dream Team (I just made them their own category since they’re difficult to place)

- Dream: Did that one stream where he remodeled the house? Usually doesn’t stream on the SMP much anymore.  Mostly just shows up in other people’s streams, usually to be mysterious and cryptic

- George: He sleeps

- Sapnap: Building a new secret base, did karaoke with Karl, also involved in the Dreamon plot and the Battle of the Lake (but didn’t stream that) and was everyone’s favorite pet-killer during the Pet War. Him and Fundy have some history. Also, recently stole Tommy’s horse?? So they’re going to have to address that at some point, probably.

Bonus:

- Phil: Not even in the SMP but still manages to RP somehow?? If you’re not following him already you absolutely should

And that’s it for now! I hope this was vaguely helpful? At all? And again, I’m almost certainly missing things because it’s just so much to keep track of

Hope you enjoyed!

[lavender-lotion]

Fanfic Writer Asks

I was tagged by @asarcasticwitch - thank you so much!

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

737, which is an ugly number :(

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

1,890,054 words, which ... AH I might actually get to 2mil by the end of the year!

3) How many fandoms have you written for, and what are they?

thank you, ao3 dashboard for this handy list:

Teen Wolf (TV) (377)

X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies) (187)

Marvel Cinematic Universe (93)

Glee (29)

Young Justice (Cartoon) (11)

Kingsman (Movies) (9)

Original Work (9)

The Avengers (Marvel Movies) (8)

Criminal Minds (US TV) (7)

Thor (Movies) (6)

Deadpool (Movieverse) (5)

Weird City (TV) (5)

X-Men (Original Timeline Movies) (4)

Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters (Anime & Manga) (4)

Ragnarok (TV 2020) (4)

Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies) (3)

Teen Wolf (TV) RPF (3)

Iron Man (Movies) (3)

The House in the Cerulean Sea - T. J. Klune (2)

Venom (Marvel Movies) (1)

Stranger Things (TV 2016) (1)

Captain America (Movies) (1)

Fate: The Winx Saga (TV) (1)

Power Rangers Ninja Storm (1)

X-Men - All Media Types (1)

Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan (1)

Riverdale (TV 2017) (1)

X-Men Evolution (1)

Push (2009) (1)

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

With You, I Belong

Mates and Marriage Proposals

The Perceptions of You and I

(baby) maybe that matters more

Breathing You In

5) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

ughh so, fair warning, I have a lot of works. I definitely do not remember all of them, however I do have four works tagged as Unhappy Ending and then another nine works tagged Ambiguous/Open Ending, which is way more than I’d thought I had! 

however, there is one fic that stands out in mind when I think about which of my works has the angstiest ending! Heed the tags :)

And Now?

Teen And Up Audiences | Major Character Death | M/M | Teen Wolf (TV) | Chris Argent/Peter Hale/Stiles Stilinski | Chris Argent, Peter Hale, Stiles Stilinski | Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Canonical Character Death, Peter Hale Dies, Unhappy Ending

Stiles Stilinski finds out who his soul mates are by setting one on fire.

6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

ughhhhhhhh I truly do not know??? 

7) Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I don’t write many crossovers at all! I have some mcu/teen wolf cross overs, I have a teen wolf/glee cross over plotted (that i’ll probably never write), but my strangest is probably this teen wolf/x-men cross over!

what-ifs (don’t fuckin’ matter to no one)

Teen And Up Audiences | No Archive Warnings Apply | M/M | X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies)Teen Wolf (TV) | Logan (X-Men)/Sheriff Stilinski | Logan (X-Men), Sheriff Stilinski, Stiles Stilinski | Memory Loss, Telepathy, Mentions of War, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Child Neglect, Grief/Mourning, Telepath Stiles Stilinski, Telekinetic Stiles Stilinski, Nightmares, Cuddling & Snuggling

There’s somethin’ there. Somethin’ that has him sleeping curled up on his side with a pillow tucked to his chest, somethin’ that has him splittin’ up his food ‘fore he eats ‘cause he don’t need as much as a baseline. Has him turnin’ to tell someone shit that ain’t there. There’s just...there’s just somethin’ there that’s missin’ and it shouldn’t be missin’.

8) Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

sometimes! I don’t write a lot of smut because I actively dislike writing it, but the smut I do write is super super soft and sappy and full of emotions lol

9) Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I respond to almost all of my comments! comments i won’t respond to: negative comments, unsolicited criticism, comments that aren’t relevant to the fic itself, comments simply asking for more 

I love love love responding to comments! I love every single comment that I get and I want to show how much I appreciate getting them, and personally I think responding to comments is the only way to do that! everyone has different comment philosophies, but for me, if someone is taking the time to comment on my fic like I so badly want them to, I think it’s important to respond to show my appreciation! 

10) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

aha YEAH I DO. this past weekend I actually got a number of shitty comments and had to file two ao3 abuse reports for harrasment (: I love it

I am no stranger to hate comments. I write copious amounts of age difference fic. I write copious amounts of incest. I am not going to apologize nor am I going to feel bad for enjoying either.

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

ughhh I sure as heck hope not! 

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! I have a number of them :) I always always do my best to make sure it’s linked to the original fic, AND that I add a tag noting that there’s a translation!

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have made a few attempts! the only successful attempt is there's nothing i wouldn't do to make you feel my love which is a collaboration with @flightinflame, not quite a co-write!

14) What’s your all-time favorite ship?

I am unable to answer this lol I don’t have an all-time favourite. mutli-shipping forever.

15) What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

god okay this is such a good question! imma ramble about a few so bear with me here! (i may have 700 posted works but I also have a few hundreds wips & ideas floating around in my gdrive, too)

gone & past - this is a starrish wip i’d started in 2017. I ended up deleting it from ao3 to rewrite it and never got there, but I have about 20k of content! I built my home, inside of you - thorki human au with college jock thor and high school dancer loki. i’ve got a start and nothing else Sheriff Stilinski Gets Some Sweet Sweet Lovin’ - massive wip where... well, the sheriff fucks his way through the entire pack. I want to write it but. trans allison au - this is an au where allison is trans and that changes the entire season 1 canon. it features stallison, petopher, and a looooooong ass outline that will never exist beyond my wips You Fill My Heart (With Such a Gentle Love) - this is a stetopher a/b/o au with pregnant omega stiles and alpha pair petopher falling in love. it started as a labour of love to someone I no longer have in my life. I have about 30k, a full outline, but idk. makes me sad to think about it they slipped briskly into an intimacy from which they never recovered - this is my big x-men first class rewrite that I honestly don’t think i’ll ever finish. I have a few thousand words, a full outline, but no love lost for cherik so. doubtful Physiotherapy (I'll Be Your Baby) - this was a fic I was SO excited about, and then it kinda flopped and stayed a wip because I didn’t have a plan or the motivation to finish it. it’s a winterspider human au with amputee bucky and science twink peter that I adore the premise of but who knows breathing you in chapter 2 - I have a massive second chapter planned for this fic but the first did so good so fast I am way too intimidated to write more in case everyone hates it lmao

there are more arjgoirjeg there are so many more but these are the bigger ones I can think of right now!

16) What are your writing strengths?

ughhhhh I hate answering this because I have, like, seriously bad imposter syndrome around my writing BUT I do think i’m able to weave poignant backstory into narration & i write strong, distinctive narrative voices!

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

literally I can’t write settings at all. I don’t know how people vividly describe settings but I absolutely cannot do that and it’s one of the reasons I haven’t delved into original fiction. I need to write the town my characters live in?? fuck that imma just use a location we’ve seen on screen & let readers fill in the blanks lmao

I am also shit at long fic. I don’t have the mind for long and interesting plots, and I don’t have the focus to write long fic (which is why every long fic i’ve ever posted has taken me literal years to complete smh).

18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I like it! both as a reader and as a writer. as a writer, I generally only use a few words, or small sentences that can be understood by context, and I generally don’t 

19) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

the last thing I wrote and posted was this one:

Languish

Teen And Up Audiences | No Archive Warnings Apply | M/M | X-Men (Original Timeline Movies) | John Allerdyce/Bobby Drake | Bobby Drake, John Allerdyce, X-Men (Team) | Not Canon Compliant, Future Fic, Established Relationship, Summer, Teasing, Fluff

It was a really, really hot Saturday, and most of the school was outback, enjoying the sun, not caring about the heat, and having the time of their life.

Everyone but Bobby, of course, who was melting away.

“I just want to remind everyone that I make ice. I am the Ice Man. I am not built for the heat and soon enough I’m going to melt away into nothing.”

20) What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

this is another impossible question! I have a few I really enjoy, but I really don’t think I have a favourite that stands out above the rest!

i’m tagging: @4magicandmayhem @insertmeaningfulusername @midrashic @wynnefic @ikeracity @stronglyobsessed @elledelajoie @wolfnprey​ & anyone else who sees it and wants to do it! seriously! go ahead :)

blank questions below the read more!

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

3) How many fandoms have you written for, and what are they?

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

5) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

7) Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve written?

8) Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

9) Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

10) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

14) What’s your all-time favorite ship?

15) What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

16) What are your writing strengths?

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

19) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

20) What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

[yeaahishowedupatyourparty]

familia - soraya’s first album (unreleased) 

this would be her first album since leaving fifth harmony which, in my opinion, makes so much more sense than using ‘camila’ because it’s just more personal to her roots and everything. before this album, she’s dated julian, harvey and dallas & has been flirting on and off with nate and lucas. she also had a rocky friendship (which is on the mend) with hensley & christelle.

1. familia

the intro track, no specific meaning.

2. celia

written in spanish but it’s basically about the infatuation that comes at the beginning of a relationship and the power you feel when someone would give you everything. it’s probably an earlier one written about julian for sure.

3. psychofreak (ft.charleigh)

her experience in st judes and being in fifth harmony, basically the dark side of fame and how she’s felt growing up in st judes. she’s twenty now, so she’s been in the academy for two years and has had her fair share of hate and abuse :’) definitely the darkest song she’s ever released.

4. bam bam

about her finding her confidence again after not feeling good enough for so long...and also kind of finding her self-worth and not being bitter towards any of her exes, even though all three relationships were kind of messy. i feel like line 1 would be @ harvey (ocean x obx reference - we can pretend the song was released when it was out LOL), line 2 would be julian’s (the settling down reference) and then line 3 would be dallas’s (being kids at the start but being grown ups now)

5.la buena vida

about julian. pre-revamp, him getting SO caught up in work became a problem in their relationship and i imagine it would still be the case now because he never did anything like cheat or be awful to her. it’s a song about naturally falling apart but (fairly or unfairly) blaming the other person. 

6. quiet

nate. he was her first hook-up/fwb after a looooooong time of being on her own and he definitely made her feel wanted again and reintroduced her to putting herself back out there, even if it wasn’t that serious.

7. boy’s don’t cry

harvey!! they broke up because he was in a bad place after janey but never actually let her in, even though she kind of knew that was the case. i doubt soraya would’ve felt entitled to ask him about it but the song is kind of what she wishes she said because it might’ve all gone differently. 

8. hasta los dientes

in spanish because I feeel like this song was in progress for a long time, plus it’s her swallowing her pride and she’s banking on people being too lazy to translate LOL but it’s about her jealousy for dallas liking other girls like ruby and gisele so much.

9. no doubt

part two to hasta los dientes. it’s in english and I think she added it to the album when she stopped giving a fuck, and also when it was more or less confirmed that he was interested in other girls. ALSO, it’s about how the paranoia from her thing with dallas effected her future ones (she always had a suspicion there was something with madison and julian)

10. don’t go yet 

having fwb in general but I feel like the flirtationship she has with lucas because it’s genuinely exciting and she definitely has a bit of a crush on him right now, but they haven’t actually done A LOT. it’s more what she imagines :’) without trying to sound too crazy.

11. lola

a song about valentina and everything she sacrificed to make sure soraya’s life was as good as it could be, i feel like this song will be so much more effective when we do the parents au because valentina is such a dedicated/hard-working character hjkfl

12. everyone at this party

ALL THREE OF HER EXES AGAIN AND THE SONG CAN BE SPLIT PERFECTLY: VERSE ONE IS JULIAN, VERSE TWO IS DALLAS, VERSE THREE IS HARVEY. THE CHORUS IS ALL OF THEM. 

[eleanorbloom]

Hi! I'm curious about The Luckiest Ones, Witness and the Aurora Ideas. 👀

Kalyy thanks for asking!

The Luckiest Ones it's the wedding fic. I have outlined some things, but I know I'll only be able to properly writing it once I've finished the proposal fic (even if I already posted the headcanon lol, that's how my brain works.)

Anyway, here some snippets of the wedding vows, I don't know if they'll make the cut, but that what I was inspired to write many months ago:

Bryce: For ten years, and maybe my whole life, there was no one in the world that could say they know me well, but all that changed after you. Everything changed after you. The way I see myself, the way I see others, the way I see our profession and the people. The way I see love. Because you made me see it in another light, and since then you’ve shown me so many lights and shades, and everyone of them are beautiful by your side.

Eleanor: One of the things I admire the most about you, is your ability to bring out the best in people. As someone who is so self assured and always shows the best of yourself, having that capacity to bring that out from others inusual. And you did it with me since the first day. You barely know me, but you pushed me to be better, to learn from my mistakes. And since that day you haven’t done anything but push me to be better. A better doctor, a better friend, a better girlfriend, fiancée, daughter, sister. You trusted in me before I learned to trust myself. You loved me before I even took a huge step in loving myself the way I deserved. Is constant learning with you...

Aurora ideas are just ideas that pop in my mind to write about her and Rosalía. I have a NSFW idea about their first time. Is a couple weeks after they start dating, both had free day, Rosalía returns from work one morning after a long shift, takes a shower and goes to sleep with Aurora, they have breakfast, things heat up and they made love for the first time.

I have another idea about coming out to friends, Aurora and Rosalía tell ther friends they're together over dinner.

Witness is a fic I tried to write for OHHFs Surgery Week Event, about the ending but never had the inspo to finish it. It's Eleanor & Bryce (OH canon, not WYR canon) relationship through the eyes of a nurse, Sarah.

Sarah has seen them blossom since their very first day.

A rare thing.

It usually takes a couple of weeks to see the first couple of residents put in evidence their attraction for one another. There’s no time for anything else but patients and work when you work in a hospital.

But they... They hadn’t met a day and they were already crazy for each other.

Sarah heard the gasp the moment Zaid Mirani opened the door of a supply closet while she was checking on a chart in the hallway. For a moment, she thought it was just another intern crying on their very first day but then, as she looked inside the room, she found two brand new interns tangled in a very heated kiss.

She didn’t get who they were. It was dark and Mirani was blocking most of the entry. So she stayed a few feet from the door and waited, just to see who they were. Later that day she’d find out it was Bryce Lahela and Eleanor Bloom. Two names she wouldn't forget. Not because somehow she started keeping tabs on them, but because there was something about them that awoke her curiosity. It's like for some reason you want to see some people shine.

And she wanted to see them shine. Individually and together.

ahh I wish I had the inspo and patience to finish all these wips, but my brain is still burnt out and it's a medium capacity to write in english so they'll have to wait a looooooong way before they see the light lol

[sadaveniren]

oooh, what are you doing for big bang? 😍 (if you're ready to share that yet of course.. i'm just very excited already!!)

Haha I’m finishing a fic I had to abandon back in 2019 because morning sickness kicked my ass. I had it all plotted and planned but I couldn’t look at a computer screen for two months which really cut down my ability to write. I coulda swore I had posted a snip of it back in 2019 when I had hopes and dreams of finishing it on time but fuck if I can find it.

I’ll throw a looooooong snip under the cut for people interested

The kitchen was a mess when the doorbell rang. Harry’s hands were covered in flour from kneading dough, and Finley’s were covered in the sauce they’d made to marinate the chicken. The idea had been to make a chicken pot pie but Finley had found a recipe and Harry was horrible at telling his daughter no so here they were, making pie dough from scratch and marinating chicken before they put it into the pie. The two of them looked at each other as the doorbell rang again and Harry sighed.

“Just a minute,” he called, as he went to wash his hands quickly. “Hands,” he said to Finley as he left the kitchen to go to the door of the flat.

A smiling man about his age greeted him. Harry had a moment where he thought he looked kind of like David Beckham but that couldn’t be right. He blinked a couple times, looking the man over. “May I help you?”

The man stuck his hand out. “Hello Mr. Styles, my name is Liam Malik. May I come in?”

Harry looked at his hand and then up at the man again. There was nothing particularly dangerous seeming about the man; he had a slight air of authority but nothing like a police officer or someone like that. “I’m sorry. Who are you?” Harry heard Finley in the kitchen and he stepped forward a bit, closing the door so he and Liam Malik were away from her.

Liam Malik did not look bothered at all, he just continued to smile, his eyes crinkling a bit. “I’m a professor. I teach at a school in Scotland called Hogwarts. We are a school for <i>gifted</i> children.”

Harry narrowed his eyes. “I’m sorry, but my daughter is already enrolled in a school, and we quite like the accelerated track she’s on.”

“No, not-“ Liam Malik seemed to falter for the first time. “May we please step inside? I promise I just want to offer you and Finley an opportunity to help her grow to her best abilities.”

“Like I said, I think we have everything set up quite well, so no. I don’t think-“

Liam Malik huffed. “Have you ever noticed anything different about your daughter? Or your house in the last couple years? Months?” He looked through his pockets, pulling out a phone that he started to tap through. “February 1st maybe? Or, back at Christmas, well that’s always an exciting time of year so that’s no surprise. A surge that was only in one place?”

Harry narrowed his eyes, even as his mind ticked back to his birthday – the candles that kept relighting on his cake even though he knew they weren’t trick candles – and Christmas, when the tree caught on fire, and then suddenly, overnight, regrew. Liam Malik was giving him a patient look. “How do you?”

“May I please come in and speak to you and Finley about our school?”

Harry’s hand turned the door knob and he nodded. His throat felt heavy. “Yeah. Sure.” Liam Malik smiled as he took the offer, stepping into the house. Harry could see the edge of Finley around the corner and he sighed. “Finn, you don’t need to eavesdrop. You are a part of this as well.”

Finley didn’t need to be told twice as she scurried into the room, and Harry noticed her hands were dry. She looked at Liam, and then Harry, a sly smile coming across her face. “Mum, is this-?”

Harry held up a hand. “Stop. No.” Finley just shrugged. Harry didn’t know where she got these romantic ideas that one day her dad would just magically appear (a lie, he did, he knew the romantic dramas they watched together filled her imagination) but this was not the time. “This is Mr. Malik. He’s from a school for gifted students.”

Liam smiled, looking at a seat. “Hello, Finley. Like your mum said I’m a professor at Hogwarts. School of Witchcraft and Wizardy.”

“I’m sorry – what?” Harry said, snapping his head up.

Liam looked unbothered, his eyes were on Finley as he pulled out an envelope from his pocket. “This is for you,” he said, handing it to Finley.

She took the envelope carefully and looked it over. “Looks rather old. Haven’t seen a stamp like this in ages.”

Liam just laughed. “Yeah, there are some things I don’t appreciate about wizarding society and the fact they are about one hundred fifty years behind the times is definitely up there.”

“Are you a witch then?” Finley asked. “Am <i>I</i> one? Wait? Was my dad one?”

Liam looked at Harry who shrugged. “Probably not, I imagine. A lot of times witches and wizards are born to non-magical homes – muggles we call them. They’re called muggleborn. I’m a muggleborn actually. Neither of my parents are magical, and my sister isn’t either.”

Harry held up a hand. “Wait, wait. She can’t- this can’t-?”

Liam gave him a steady look, one that seemed to convey his earlier words, about the <i>different</i> things happening. “I can show you if you need. Something small.”

Finley lit up, staring at him. “Yes! Please!”

Harry watched as Liam pulled out a… stick. It was dark brown with a couple of knots in it. He gave it a quick, controlled swish, as he pointed to the picture on the table. Right before Harry’s eyes it began to levitate, rising up and up. He gasped, covering his mouth. “Oh my god.”

The picture went back down as gently as it rose.

Liam was smiling. “You can see why I wanted to speak with you in here then?”

“I’m gonna pass out,” Harry whispered.

[darlingdreames]

I know others have gotten that stupid question when someone finds out that you like The Beatles they ask, “Oh yeah? Name five Beatles songs that weren’t big hits.” The other day I told someone that my favorite Beatle is Paul McCartney and they said, “Ok, name five songs from McCartney’s solo career.” Laaaaaawd I have nothing to prove to anyone, but it always grinds my gears when people assume I’m only wearing a Beatles t-shirt for aesthetics, or I only love Paul for his looks. Bitch please.

So I compiled this list of songs that I first tried to narrow down to ten and quickly realized I couldn’t even narrow it down to twenty, lol. My favorite Paul McCartney songs post Beatles era are listed below with links to YouTube to hear each song. I left out anything he did as a collaboration just because this list is hella long already. Please feel free to add your favs as well!

~

36. Calico Skies

- I love the simplicity of this song. Paul’s finger picking on the guitar vaguely reminds me of the style of Blackbird.

 35. Put It There

- This song has a soft, sweet melody that always gets stuck in my head.

 34. The World Tonight

- “I go back so far, I’m in front of me.” Sometimes Paul’s lyrics are awesomesauce, lol.

 33. Call Me Back Again

- I love how this song kinda goes back to his roots. Very oldies, very bluesy. Lots of wailing Paul and great guitar licks.

 32. This One

- Might be a song for John if you squint sideways and upside down. Another one that’s a definite earworm.

 30./31. Venus and Mars/Rock Show

- I’m sort of cheating but these two songs def go together. Venus and Mars is very melodic and draws you in, jumping right into the rocker that is aptly named Rock Show. A great way to kick off the V&M album.

 29. C Moon

- This tune is very sentimental to my sister and me. As kids we’d run around the house singing it at the top of our lungs. Also, the beginning when Paul misses the intro and just keeps the gaff in the song makes it that much better, lol.

 28. Somedays

- A quiet song, Paul’s more thoughtful, reflective side. The dueling acoustic guitars and harp are especially lovely.

 27. Big Barn Bed

- I used to skip over this song because I thought it made no sense. Then one day it hit me how much fun it is. And now I wanna keep on sleeping in a big barn bed too, haha.

 26. With a Little Luck

- One of those uplifting, positive tracks that Paul is so freaking good at creating.

 25. Young Boy

- Just the way Paul sings “looooooong” and “strooooong” at the end of a couple of the lyrics. And the guitar solo kicks ass too.

 24. Goodnight Tonight

- Ooh boy, where to start with this song? First and foremost, that BASSLINE. Perhaps it’s a disco-ish dance number that meets electronica? I don’t even know. John said he didn’t like this song but he loved Paul’s bass playing on it, so there you go, lol.

 23. Nineteen-Hundred and Eighty-Five

- This one is very upbeat, but the slowed down intermission with the “ooohs” is what makes it interesting to me. It also includes some amazing piano playing.

 22. Hi, Hi, Hi

- I prefer the live version of this song, but it’s tons of fun no matter what.

 21. Junk

- A very soft tune that would have fit perfectly on The White Album. Very stripped back and almost sad.

 20. Off the Ground

- Paul at his very best at creating melodies that are catchy and fun and don’t delve too deep. “I need lovin’, you need lovin’ too.” And you can’t forget the hand claps and la la las! Good luck getting this song out of your head.

 19. Live and Let Die

- I’d be surprised if you haven’t heard this song sometime in your life. It’s one of those songs where you hear it and go, “Wait, I know this song. This is Paul McCartney?!” He be James Bond like that, heehee.

 18. Dear Boy

- I’ve heard this song is about Linda’s ex. Some think it’s about John. Either way, it’s a catchy little tune.

 17. Take It Away

- This is a great song even before you realize how amazeballs Paul’s bass playing is on it.

 16. Monkberry Moon Delight

- Y’all, WHAT EVEN IS THIS SONG?! I don’t know, but it’s so freaking FUN! Paul’s poor voice though. I feel like he probably couldn’t talk for a week after laying down the vocal track, lol.

 15. Too Much Rain

- Ugh, this song is so beautiful and so sad at the same time. Paul trying to be optimistic as always.

 14. Dear Friend

- Is this a song about John too? Maybe. Probably. A haunting melody with a solitary piano for most of it, with a heavy feeling of regret, at least imo.

 13. Band on the Run

- Here you get three songs in one, not unlike the Abbey Road medley but completely different as well. Paul knows how to kick off an album, that’s for sure!

 12. Maybe I’m Amazed

- I prefer the live version of this song too, but it kicks you in the gut no matter what. Paul loved Linda so much, and he lets everyone know it.

 11. Tug of War

- Ok, I don’t know if this song is about John. It could be. It sounds like Paul’s talking about something…more. “In another world we could stand on top of the mountain with our flag unfurled.” “We will be dancing to the beat played on a different drum.” What is Paul trying to say exactly? Many have debated the lyrics to no end. You decide.

 10. Too Many People

- This is FOR SURE about John, and the breakup of the Beatles. And it started a song war between John and Paul that would go on for years. But it’s also a bop, lol.

 9. Here Today

- This is Paul speaking to John after John’s death. And it’s completely heartbreaking. I have to be in a certain mindset to listen to this one.

 8. Hope of Deliverance

- If this song doesn’t get your foot tapping and your head bopping, idk you might want to check your pulse.

 7. Silly Love Songs

- DAT BASS THO. For real, this song is built around Paul’s bassline and it’s amazing! Also, this was Paul basically giving John the finger for making fun of his “granny shit” and “silly love songs.”

 6. Jet

- This is one that I crank up in my car and it may or may not make me drive a little faster, lol. I love it so much.

 5. Little Lamb Dragonfly

- A two for one! Both songs are lovely, but I particularly love the dragonfly lyrics and melody. (Yes, this song is possibly about John as well (“how did two rights make a wrong?”), but it’s debatable.) Listening to it once usually isn’t enough for me.

4. Little Willow

- Whew, this one makes me emotional. The guitar, the lyrics, the piano, Paul’s voice – all so soothing and unbelievably soft and achy. It breaks my heart in the sweetest way.

 3. Mull Of Kintyre

- Arguably the biggest hit of Paul’s solo career, it’s like the Hey Jude of its own time. And it has freaking BAGPIPES, lol. This is one of those songs that you’ve heard before, but you don’t know where and you don’t know how, you just have. It will stick with you for a long time.

 2. Let Me Roll It

- This song. THIS SONG. Ughhhhhhhh. So sexy I can’t even begin to explain. You just have to listen and let it take you there. Another one where the bassline makes you want to weep. Tingles. Tingles everywhere.

 1. Wanderlust

- This will forever be my favorite solo Paul McCartney song. Completely underrated and simply magical. George Martin has said that this is Paul’s greatest vocal performance and I wholly agree. His voice is so pure and melodic, I sometimes get emotional listening to it. The song as a whole just checks all the boxes of what I most love about a Paul McCartney song – beautiful, melodious and timeless. There’s that old jokey saying, “If this ain’t played at my funeral, I ain’t going.” Yeah, this is that song for me.

[alatismeni-theitsa]

Thanks for bringing the racebending to my attention. I never considered that it was harmful towards the origin culture. I considered that it was kind of strong to claim that sort of race thing in a way, but maybe that comes from the more.. christianity? view of where there isnt a direct way that God looks, except any way the person perceives. That's probably what I thought, too, until just now reading your answer to someone else. So.. it's not okay? 1/?

I honestly want to understand as my perspective on this now changes. It makes total sense why it would be entitled of someone to do such a thing, and how it's inconsiderate of the actual origin culture that the deities come from now that I'm thinking about it in this way. So again thank you for bringing this up and answering that other anon. I have some things to revise in my head on this, as I honor Apollo and Hermes, I want to make sure that I get accurate and do my research.

I really enjoy being able to read your experiences and I think it's important as, someone outside the culture, gets to experience and understand more to be as accurate and non... whats the word... inappropriate with representing such a thing, I guess I can say. If that makes sense.__________________________________________________________

Thank you for sending a message and for listening to the opinion of Greek people. (I am not the only one with that opinion, many of my 500 followers also share the same ideas.) Anyways prepare yourself for a looooooong analysis! So, get under comfy blankets and take your tea/coffee next to you!

To begin with, there are Greeks that don’t mind but those are usually Greeks who have close contact with the American way of thinking through social media. Or some that don’t care because the approach our mythology in a kinda superficial way? I am not saying this to offend any Greeks who don’t mind the racebending. Every Greek has the right to have a relationship with their culture according to their own standards. Those people who think racebending is ok are usually no less patriots than the ones who do. However, those who don’t mind the race bending are extremely rare to find. 

If I go to my 50 y/o aunt and announce to her that foreigners depict Demeter as Black she is gonna lose her mind. I have also asked the opinion of Greeks who are not into social media or groups where Greek mythology is discussed by foreigners. When they were informed of the racebending the first thing they said was “but... why??” and they couldn’t fathom how this could help anyone. The second thing they say is “But the Gods are white!” explaining that our ancestor have depicted them as Caucasian for centuries and we, as Greeks, know no other depiction of them.

I assure you, it has nothing to do with white superiority - which is a myth anyways. Greeks can be perfectly racist to people who are pastry white :P If you racebended the gods into any other race, we would still have a problem. It’s all a matter of respecting iconography and tradition. It would be ignorant of even us Greeks to change the depiction of the gods when our ancestors were very clear in their art about their race. It was also clear in antiquity that the gods had bodies. I am in another computer and I cannot access my files, but I had a file for a philosopher who tried to argue against the public opinion that the gods didn’t have bodies. But the majority of ancient Greeks believed that the gods had a physical presence.

Also, race matters for Greeks as it does for most of other cultures. You expect Nigerian deities to look like the average Nigerian, yes? Because they were created by a homogenous Black population. You think the same for Indian and Chinese deities, yes? It makes sense for deities and public figures from a certain culture to look like the people of that culture. I think it’s common sense. Turning an old Nigerian deity into a Chinese, would’t represent the Nigerian people any more. For similar reasons, we don’t want our important heritage figures changed. (In case a warrior was described as Black African in our ancient texts, then of course we wouldn’t have a problem with keeping that figure Black).

You are correct when saying that the race bending comes from a Christian point of view. I think many hellenic polytheists/pagans/wiccans haven't managed to escape the Christian logic. In Christianity we have accepted for many centuries that saints and important figures would be viewed with different races, so people can come closer to them. For example, there is a Chinese, Native American, Mexican (different tribes), Black Jesus etc. Most of the times they are also dressed in the traditional regalia of the respective culture. It's a thing for the last 200 years at least. 

Even Greeks depicted Jesus kinda white (he has an olive skin complexionand brown hair, which is closer to the Greek standards). And this happened since the Byzantine Empire. We even call the Virgin Mary "Mother of all Greeks" (apparently Mary has a particular interest in our nation xD) We have made her into a Greek mum. But we kinda have the freedom to do this because Christianity is an international religion which is alive for the last 2.000 years, so these changes come organically.

On the contrary, almost nobody has worshipped the Greek gods since 500 AC. The religion was been dead for almost 2.000 years, until Western classicists made it a popular. Now people who have no actual contact with the Greek culture start worshiping those gods. Don’t get me wrong, I believe any foreigner can worship the Greek gods! The thing is that most of the foreign worshippers don’t see the Greek gods as part of the culture that created them, because of the Americanization of the gods in the media and the complete stripping of the Greek elements from them.

But gods are still part of the Greeks’ heritage. Many ancient traditions and myths have kept from the ancient years, we have the names of gods and the gods are still used as symbols here. Our culture hasn’t died, as many westerners (perhaps subconciously) believe. It is alive and evolving, despite foreigners usually ignoring us. So, the ideas about our ancient religion have been involving with us, becoming part of our national identity in a unique way. 

After 2.000 years of the religion’s “death”, foreigners become enamored with Greece again. But not our Greece. They become enamored with a part of our culture that hasn’t existed in millenia. They study the culture only till the Roman years and then they skip 2.000 years of evolving cultural identity and go straight to the 21st century western (west Europe/America) ideals and societies.

You can only imagine how it seems to us Greeks, when foreigners suddenly remember us again and, on top of that, they don’t become part of our culture but they insist that a part of our culture (in its ancient form) becomes tailored to their own standards. And now foreigners ingore our own point of view, because, as they have done the last 2.000 years, they keep on ignoring us :P (I mean they as a people, greatly generalizing here). Please see that post for how disconnected a Greek feels about the modern Greek religion, and the analysis that comes with it. (Link)

Similarly, imagine if suddenly the Nigerian culture became a trend in Greece and now some Greeks become interesting in the old (almost dead to Nigeria) worship of Orishas. And now they want to depict the Orishas as White, because they, themselves are white and maybe white deities reflect better the racial situation in Greece. Wouldn’t that be disrespectful, though? Not only because the Black becomes White, but because we would take an inactive worship from the Nigerians and add our own politics to it.

Our situation is also kind of special because for the last centuries every country that has become interested in our culture has abused it. They have stolen antiquities from us and northwestern Europe but also in the US have no problem having those stolen artifacts and displaying them. There is a tradition of foreigners claiming to “love” Greece but they are really in love with our ancient aesthetic and they don’t give a shit about the Greeks who preserve the culture and even die to protect their antiquities. 

So we are used to this kind of treatment and it hurts extra when it’s happening again. But we are also desensitized. For some reason a person can be dressed as a Greek deity for Halloween and we won’t bat an eye. At the same time, I see people from other cultures defending the importance of their figures, when foreigners dress up as them for fun. 

I don’t understand how we consider this disrespectful for any other culture but if it’s the Greek we don’t care. Why could this be? Perhaps because many Greeks have come to see their own culture as public property. Perhaps because it is what the prominent international media tells us and maybe because we are used to selling our culture for profit (we are a tourist country) and we only see it as merchandise. 

Let me add I am not only fascinated by my own cultures but also cultures around the world. It makes no sense to me that people want Gods of color and their only solution is to make the Greek gods Black. Have we forgotten the numerous rich cultures of Asia and Africa?? There are a ton of deities there who, if you want to draw Afrocentric art for example, will be great inspiration! It reminds me of a publishing house which put POC in the covers of western classic books (thus kinda turning the white main characters into POC only in the cover) while not promoting books from POC or books featuring POC. I think it’s counterproductive.

I think that’s all I have to say for now! Feel free to ask more questions if I haven’t covered you! And if you have more thoughts you can drop them in my ask box.

Also, one question for you before you leave. You mentioned “I considered that it was kind of strong to claim that sort of race thing in a way”. Can you explain to me why? I would like to understand better people who think this way. Then maybe I could explain more effectively to them that their race bending practice isn’t as helpful as they think it is.

P.S. Even saying “races” of people exist is considered deeply racist in Greece (and Europe). I mention that as potential food of thought. For us there are only hues of skin colors, not races, so our social politics are different. 

[hadtochangemyurlquick]

what’s your favorite thing you’ve ever written?

so i like this one shot about adora and angella’s relationship in my spop series i haven’t updated in 18 yrs you might have to read the whole series for context so....

i love the apple butter au i wrote but i think i wanna do a run through of edits with it just to give it a looksy

and there’s a scene in the ranch au which maybe isn’t my best? writing, like it’s good but it articulates a message i haven’t seen articulated much but unfortunately the scene isn’t for a looooooong time so :(

but my absolute favorite thing I ever wrote, not best bc i know i’ve written better since, is a poem i wrote for my friend last march. it’s a little bit of an angsty high school poem so strap in. again: it’s not my best. i’ve written better, but it is my favorite.

All along there were two of us. Just me and you. We had known it all along: on that grassy hill, in the alcove of our silence. But we had lived cut away for so long it was hard to hold as easy in our arms as we do now.

We are hollow— You and I— reflections of each other and the satellites, and the last of our wonder. We are the last people on this hollow planet and we are suffocating one another.

Years from now, you know, we’ll find it. Whatever it was that made us you and I Whatever led us to those bricks and that pavement and that place— that place that we live— cut away and hollow and suffocating.

There are just two of us and we are fragile, tepid beings, empty as the sky was that night freezing off our wishful thinking.

[jeongyunhoed]

Just One Afternoon

Wooyoung/OC

I felt the “Just One” oneshots needed a third for some reason. Anyway, if you enjoyed Just One Night and Just One Day, here’s the third and last part set two more years later. As per usual, this is one looooooong conversation. Enjoy. 

Wooyoung was standing in front of a full-length mirror, checking and double-checking his tuxedo in case there were creases that needed to be smoothed out. There he was, in a swanky waiting area in a hotel, the rest of his things in the corner, all ready for him to pick up once he left the place. He noticed some bits of confetti and rice still in his hair and he smiled to himself as he patted it out, the grains and the tiny pieces of paper falling off and onto the carpeted floor, reminding him once again of the biggest moment in his life that only occurred a few hours ago. The reminder of that moment made him look down on the gold band that was on his ring finger of his left hand. 

After 4 years of dating and several months of getting engaged, Wooyoung and Jea got married. It was a very small ceremony, only filled with the people they held dear: Immediate family and their closest friends. Some tears of happiness were shed as the two of them said their vows, promising to stick together through thick and thin, no matter how many fights they’ve had (and they’ve had a lot), and no matter what kind of challenges await them. Everyone else were also left teary-eyed at their vows, but swooned at the giggly kisses they shared once they were declared husband and wife. 

“Are you ready?” He called out to her. 

“Yes!” Jea appeared, in a shorter version of her dress this time with the bits of her wedding gown carefully stored back into the box it came in. “Are you ready?” 

“Yeah, the party’s over, everyone’s headed for home, but we’re staying here, aren’t we?” Wooyoung was beaming as he approached her. 

Jea was smiling just as wide. “Yeah,” She wrapped her arms around him. “It’s just us left, but I don’t feel like going upstairs yet” 

“Why not?” He kissed her cheek. 

“I don’t know, I guess I just want to savor being down here, somehow I have this feeling that once we step out of his ballroom, it’ll all be different again,” She shrugged. 

“It’s a good kind of different” He pressed his lips onto her forehead. “There’s also the honeymoon, and the rest of this weekend to ourselves” He mumbled against her skin. “Not leaving the suite until we need to check out?” She could feel him smirk. 

“Or maybe walk along the poolside and just spend time together, like how we always do? Or whenever you get back from work at the studio?” Jea suggested, leaning up to kiss him. Wooyoung ultimately decided to leave his crew and teach dance at the studio they frequented instead. He had his worries about whether or not he would enjoy it, but he was pleasantly surprised after the first few days, realizing how he felt the same happiness being able to teach other people and kids as when he was dancing with his crew, and dare he even admit it, maybe even happier. It might have been because he knew he got to come home to Jea everyday, or getting to dance for hours without having to leave or even push himself further to worsen his injury. 

“That too, you want to go for a walk? We should have the bellhop bring our bags upstairs” He said, and she nodded, the two of them linked together as they left the room. 

~ 

“Was I a nightmare for a bride-to-be?” Jea suddenly asked him as they were by the pool that afternoon. The orange and yellow glow from the sun in the horizon cast an orange tint over the place “I wasn’t, right? Or was I?” 

“You were a nightmare because you didn’t like the wedding topper I picked out” Wooyoung teased. “And you made me cancel a few classes because of wine tastings and food and the cake, and I usually enjoy all of those!” He chuckled. 

“The wedding topper you picked had the bride and groom dancing, when they could’ve just stood still, it’s more timeless that way” Jea argued, laughing as well upon remembering. “Don’t you want our kids to have that topper when they get married?” 

“Of course I would, but that makes it a fun wedding cake topper, if they just stood still, it’s too ordinary” Wooyoung squeezed her hand as they sat down on the chairs. 

“Your mom talked to me before the wedding,” Jea smiled. “She wished me good luck because I now have to deal with you forever” 

Wooyoung laughed out loud. “She did? Ah, my mom, she’s the best.” 

“Your dad said the same thing to me as well” Jea added with a laugh. 

It made him laugh even more. “Ah, my parents are the best. Remember how nervous you were when I finally brought you to them? You were dreading having to meet them but then when we all met, I didn’t want to say I told you so, but I told you so” Wooyoung teased. “I mean, I guess it’s because my older brother already got married that they’re a lot more relaxed when it comes to me and my younger brother.” 

“You were just as fidgety when I had to introduce you to my parents!” Jea playfully slapped his arm. “You had this awkward smile that I can’t believe I saw” She shook her head. “They wondered if you were okay or if you liked the food or if you were just trying to be nice” She laughed. 

“Your dad is a good cook! I really liked the food! As long as it’s edible, it’s good enough for me” Wooyoung tried to poke her side in an attempt to tickle her. “Now I know where you got your looks from, though” A grin spread across his face. 

“I hope you mean that as a good thing” Jea raised a brow at him, making him chuckle and try to poke her side again. 

“Of course I meant it in a good way, didn’t I tell you that you’ll always be the pretty girl I met on the train? Did you not listen to my vows earlier?” He teased, pretending to be hurt. 

“Of course I heard you! It wasn’t like I was crying because I got hungry or something” Jea gave him a look, shaking her head. Her expression softened, and she took a moment to study his face again, from the mole under his eye, to the crinkles in his eyes when he smiled or laughed, and the way his lips curved whenever he smiled. It was a face she always looked forward to seeing every morning, afternoon, and night. She looked down at their hands and the rings on their fingers, promising that they would be together forever, with that promise made permanent. “I love you” She said softly. 

Wooyoung felt the same way when he looked back at her. “I love you too. Let’s go to the cafe, some coffee would be nice” He said, tugging on her arm as he stood up. 

~ 

Some of the servers and staff inside the hotel cafe looked at them fondly as they stepped inside the plush interior, sitting down at a corner seat. They didn’t care where they were seated, yet the staff pointed them towards the plush couch near the window that had a view of the city. The server for one, asked them if they got married and they said yes, and they offered to let them look through a selection of wine or liquor that went perfectly with the cake they were having. 

“Do you think we’ll become those annoying couples that get lovey-dovey even if we’re with friends?” Jea suddenly asked, putting the menu down. 

“We kind of are, but we haven’t been out with friends that much anyway, at least out with friends together” Wooyoung replied. “Do you think we’ll be like that?” 

“I have a feeling we will,” Jea teased. “But I guess its a good thing we haven’t gone out with friends together. I wouldn’t want to annoy people, and I already annoy you.” 

He chuckled. “Yeah, and I better be the only one who gets annoyed with you” He teased back. 

“That’s an odd threat, Mr. Jung” She grinned. 

“It’s a mutual threat, Mrs. Jung. We better be the only people that annoy each other.” 

“Deal,” Jea held out her hand and he shook it, sticking his pinky out next, which she linked with hers. She watched him look back at the menu for the dessert he wanted to try. “I’ve always wanted to travel around a faraway place by train.” 

“No you don’t, you just want to solve a murder that happens on that train” Wooyoung teased. 

“That too. Plot twist, everyone did it, they all hated him, they all had a grudge against him somehow” Jea chuckled. 

“You’d be a suspect too” He put down the menu and reached out for her hand to hold, lacing their fingers together. 

“I wouldn’t, I’d be the one solving the murder,” She shook her head. 

“You’d be a suspect of stealing my heart, that is” He winked, making her cringe. “You’d be the detective solving the murder, while I’m your charming, handsome, and ridiculously hot husband who’s helping you by trying to blend in and observe everyone else while you’re asking questions” 

Jea snorted. “I don’t know, but would everyone on that train think you’re ridiculously hot, though?” She teased. 

“Of course they would! Why wouldn’t they when I look like this?” He pushed his hair back and tried to do a sexy pose. Jea nearly cackled in her seat. 

“Your confidence is something else, but I love you for it” She grinned, sitting back when the server returned with their drinks and her dessert, a creme brulee. Jea handed him another spoon. “Crack the sugar with me.”

A giggle escaped his lips as he took the other spoon, the two of them cracking into the caramelized dessert and dipping their spoons into the custard underneath. 

~ 

Night had fallen, and they paid and left the cafe, walking down the hall and to the direction of the elevators. “Will you be able to put up with me for years to come?” Wooyoung asked. 

“Mhmm” Jea nodded. 

“Even if I get carried away while playing games?” He grinned. 

“Yeah, even then, even if I have to put on earplugs whenever I’m asleep and you’re yelling at your computer monitor” Jea squeezed his hand. 

“Good. Just trying to make sure” He teased as they stopped and pressed the elevator button. 

“Will you be able to put up with me for years to come? Even if I get cranky in the morning and all of those things you get annoyed at me for?” Jea turned the question back to him. 

Wooyoung turned to her with the biggest smile on his face and kissed her. “I look forward to it.” 

[clockworkswans]

thoughts on mots:7?? *eyes emoji*

aaaaaaah it feels like SO LONG since we’ve had music, even though we get so much content!  i feel so spoilt lmao.

think i’m gonna skip the tracks from persona, they’re all legends but i’ll end up making this ten pages long otherwise!

under the cut cause it’s looooooong, oops.

interlude shadow - this had some serious challenge coming after its god-tier predecessor, seesaw, ngl, but WOW. yoongi’s solo songs have such a unique style despite being different genres/moods and his lyrics are always what i especially look forward to diving into and shadow was no different! a lot of people say this too but the autotune works SO WELL for him and the way he plays with the rhythms in shadow is amazing. and that last section?? EXPLOSIVE. that’s gonna slay on tour oh my god.

black swan - i wish i’d made notes when it first came out but it took me a while to get used to this sound because it was so interesting and haunting. the topics in this song are so relatable and frightening tbh, it’s something i feel a lot recently, that fear of losing passion for your hobbies and job, etc, and surrendering to the darker emotions of giving up on those dreams (wow, dark, CHILL). after seeing the first performance of it as well!! omg!! some of their absolute BEST choreo yet, easily.

filter - mr. park. JIMIN. I was not prepared for this song and it’s so sexy and smooth and i want to scream thinking about choreo for this on tour, wtf man. this song was my jam right away!! the latin vibes!! rumba/salsa in a club at 2am vibes!! also idk if this is misreading the lyrics but i love the lowkey dark/seductive undertone of making anyone fall in love with you/celeb perception, etc. (probably reading way too much into it lol but still, loved the lyrics). But yes, WOW. Can he let me choreo pls?? i want him to have a CHAIR and a suit and tie and to absolutely destrOY us.

my time - before i go into this, i wanna say how much i loved the vocal line doing completely different stuff and defying all my expectations. the mood of this song is so unique and the slow rhythm with his just…absolutely gorgeous emotive voice makes it so refreshing. Also!! something i found really cool is jungkook doing stuff that’s more complex in emotion and a bit sadder/darker? he’s always had the happy golden perfect boyTM vibe and that’s cute af but also this song lets him be a bit confusing and mature and lost for once. This song hit me quite personally too because the lyrics about time and distance hit close to home as i have friends and loved ones moving out of my life and i just wanna feel not so stuck. I can’t WAIT to see what kind of staging he’ll do for this?? it could be anything lol, i really can’t guess.

louder than bombs - legit EVERYTHING i wanted from a troye/bts collaboration project oh my god. The music and build-up for this song is so bittersweet and haunting, the VOCALS oh my god?? truly stole my breath, wow. the rap line verses had some seriously hard-hitting lyrics too, the lower ranges of namjoon and yoongi made my heart STOP. (something i’ve always loved with bts is the way they play with flow through members taking different parts, which sounds so obvious lol, it’s what you do with a group, but i always love the way bts uses their members’ tones/styles to create a great mix in a song). I feel like this song truly sets up the recurring theme of acknowledging and embracing the good and bad, the wholeness of it is really vulnerable and - pun intended - explosive! it reminds me of the ‘sing louder to drown out the pain’ kind of mindset. sometimes you just gotta sing louder and sadder and ache.

ON - i actually don’t have much to say on this one because it’s just SO BTS and perfect for a title track and will absolutely GO OFF live. also the choreo is hard as hell lmao GOOD LUCK PEOPLE TRYING TO LEARN IT. also i’m gonna say it alongside everyone else but…JUNGKOOK’S HOLY BRIDGE!!!!!!!!!!!

Ugh! - *aroused and scared.* this beat!!!! slaps!!! rapline songs can never fail tbh, also….i think i already love this more than outro: tear and we haven’t even had a performance lol. I don’t have any coherent thoughts to add other than HOLYYY SHIIIIT. This will be so fierce live??? i’m gonna get whiplash headbanging probably. also…can they PLEASE do choreo for that last bit??? please. please.

zero o’clock - lol some songs just make you ugly sob and then you read the lyrics and ABSOLUTELY SOB. this little asshole right here came for my entire heart. it’s pretty spot on for how i feel right now: just get through the day and wait for the next and try and be a bit happier. the bittersweet, hopeful tone is so lovely and really touching. it’s heartbreaking ngl, but in a healing, therapeutic way. it’s so soft and mellow without being too air-y which is pretty hard to get right tbh.

inner child - my favourite vocal line solo!!! i’m always so in love with taehyung’s solo songs tbh, his voice and songs are always my cup of tea, thank you for being a true hopeless romantic sir. this song is SO end-of-indie-movie and i’m completely hooked on it already, i walk to work and keep looping it and it makes me smile and tear up just thinking about hearing it live already. I love how it’s a love letter to his younger self, comforting, sad and so full of heart and acceptance. We all find it hard to look back but to have a song that says it’s okay to be proud of every version of yourself and your growth is AMAZING. i haven’t stopped thinking of the ‘we gonna change’ and i’ll give you my world’ lines. truly magical.

friends - shut up this is the SWEETEST SONG EVER. so my best friend is finally moving away from the hometown we’ve shared for 11 years and i am very vulnerable about it right now, so this coming out when it did?? a bit of an attack lol. but it really made me smile and be SO GRATEFUL to her, and to everyone else in my life and the bonds i have around me. jimin and tae’s friendship is the sweetest thing and to have them release a platonic love song??? to sing on tour together?? after growing up and becoming legends together? wow. talk about bff goals. the adorable details in the lyrics make it so personal and genuine, and the crowd-chanting bits in the chorus are gonna sound awesome live. also not to get sappy and cheesy but this also makes me think of all the friends people have made in this fandom and community and how we’re all enjoying this awesome thing together? love that, man.

moon - THAT’S THE LOML, KIM SEOKJIN, SLAYING AGAIN. awake and epiphany were both so epic and emotional in the traditional ballad genre, so hearing this was just?? SO COOL. it’s so happy and sweet and shows off his high range effortlessly. this has such an addictive melody, i kept humming it at work today and driving myself nuts lmao. it makes me think of summer days and hanging out with friends or on your own in the sun, reading. i also love how he expanded on ‘beauty’ as it’s always a word thrown at him lol, but he made it so innocent and lovely, like idk if he’s fed up of everyone yelling handsome at him and embarrassing him lmao but it was so wholesome of him to then turn around and make a song about appreciating subtle beauty and the bonds between army and bts (god i’m LAME, blame this album).

respect - this song’s such a VIBE. love the founders of bts doing a song together, god, just bros being bros and jamming together?? WE LOVE TO SEE IT. I didn’t realise how much i’d love this duo together but it’s so natural and you can see how much they love writing and working together. the lyrics are so fun and snarky and the throwback old-school bts vibe is PERFECT. it’s that clever thing they do of re-visiting older works and combining it with your present self to make something familiar yet different. so so cool.

we are bulletproof: eternal - omg so the first line of this i started laughing so hard because i was SO SURE it would be a Concert Jam™. then i sobered up pretty quickly and cue the tears and emotions lmao. This song gives me heartbeat/sea/mikrokosmos energy, it falls in that ‘epic emotional singalong’ genre they do beautifully. you bet your ass i’m gonna be bawling at this on the tour. i lost it crying in that last bridge when they say ‘why are you still walking with us’, it just hit me that wow, i’ve been a part of this journey and tbh, it’s gonna stay with me for life. the emotions packed into this song are overwhelming af whilst still being a celebration of the 7 years bts have been together, and the individual achievements too, of them and also armys? idk it feels very collective ‘us’ vibe and it’s beautiful. 

outro: ego - READY, SET AND BEGIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MAP OF THE SOUL MAP OF THE AAAAAAAAAAAL THAT’S MY EGOOOOOOOOOO. Oh my god, this song just slays everything tbh. When it came out i could not stop repeating it for the entire week and i’m still so in love with it. By far one of my favourite solos of the album! it’s so colourful, clever and A DANCE BOP. It’s everything about why i bias jhope and his style is freaking awesome. 

okay wow, all done!!!!!