#i have to take these meds again
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Tim: my stomach hurts
Jason: Do you want a ginger ale?
Tim: I don't- I don't think I can, I- I don't think I'm responsible enough
Jason: You're not responsible enough to drink a ginger ale?
Tim: Yeah. I can barely drink water you want me to drink bubbles!?
#batman#dc#jason todd#tim drake#im having a bad reaction to medication rn and this cinversation happened#Tim so woild do somethinf like this. i assume. So not taking these meds again wtffff
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12 year old tim realizing robinās not coming back to gotham and deciding that itās Batmanās fault so he has to ruin the little bit of sanity and peace of mind Bruce has managed (read: struggled) to keep in his grasp:
#tim drake#dick grayson#robin#dc robin#bruce wayne#batman#tim drake is a menace#tim drake was and still is a die hard Robin fan before anything else#so he 100% thinks Damianās funny when heās not the one being targeted#thereās mission reports with comments in the margin like ānice šš¾ do it againā and ā650000000/10 šā and Bruce hates it sm#it starts with a mild explosion and psychological fuckery and ends with a prank war with city wide structural damage#Bruce sees Tim and Damian getting along and starts sobbing in the batcave#It was 12 year old Tim Drake and his 67 alt twitter accs against the world (Batman) when dick left#For the two years dick refused to stay in Gotham I promise you batmanās anonymous tip line was just 325 ruthless insults from tim everyday#Imagine bruce trying to figure out which of his rogues keeps photoshopping terrible .5s of Batman then mailing it to the gcpd#just to find out itās some fucking middle schooler with a bowlcut from bristol#Tim drake is unhinged and petty#Like it gets so bad that gothamites (even the rogues) have picked a side in this mostly one sided beef between a middle schooler and batman#I want internet beef between a middle schooler and a 29 year old med school dropout bruce āI am the nightā wayne#Bruce is foaming at the mouth whenever someone opens Twitter next to him#and batman is breaking your clavicle if you mention twitter in his hearing range š#Batman showing up at Timās windowsill: take down all your accounts rn and im calling your parents š”š¦#Tim pulling out a ouija board: letās see if your parents answer before mine š¤Ø#I made yj on the sims so they could fight the jl and I was like middle school!tim drake w/ a twitter acc???
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pov your boyfriend asks if you're really not going to stay the night :(
#river dipping#theodore doe#echthroi#ts4#ts4 edit#ts4 screenshots#stayed up last night playing with him and matthias in his little apartment and took some posed screenshots so i'll probably edit a few more#this one is fun bc the pose is definitely not meant for someone with his frame but i think it's sexy so. his imaginary b cups <3#btw if any of you have pillowfort :) new mattodore pic dropped on there <3#i've been pretty busy since saturday because i'm taking care of a cat with a fractured ulna at the moment#and she's on meds that upset her stomach until the 28th :(#so i'm still not done backing up my old mattodore lore posts to google docs and i also haven't really been online#tho! tbf! that's also bc i separated my personal blog from this account#so i spend most of my time logged into there and logging in and out is a chore to me jkngdhkjns#i might follow some mutuals over there bc of that tho so if you see me again. waves. hi
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oh boy 4:30 am! time to post baby rex
#generator rex#caesar salazar#rex salazar#van kleiss#my art#i was gonna draw some other stuff but im lazy#but i guess more than im lazy my meds fuuucked me up#i have to assume that ill be normal again within a few days/weeks if i stop taking it#anyways can you guys just pretend i drew my violeta and rafael and rylander and abuela ideas as well. peas and love
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I mean, it must be wild being a random regular shinigami in Seretei.
"What? A human teenager broke into Seretei and has been kicking seated officers' asses left and right and is actually winning??"
"Sir, did that boy just, I don't know, FLY to get to Sokyoku and faced off against all vice captains and captains??"
"Did you just say he's been shinigami for mere months, and he's managed to use bankai? I've been shinigami for like 100 years and haven't even come close!"
"I'm sorry. Did you hear what he said while battling against Captain Kuchiki? He became THAT strong and gained bankai for HER sake???"
Just saying, think about what kind of stories must have spread throughout soul society at that time?
I don't care if y'all say they're just friends. After all THAT, some elaborate star-crossed lovers, "prince" rescuing the "princess" sort of fairy tale, would definitely have spread throughout soul society.
Also, consider Fade to Black events...
"Oh, that whole mess was because of someone obsessing over Kuchuki Rukia. AGAIN."
"Yeah, that human shinigami boy came rushing to her rescue, was even willing to go against the officers just to get to her, and was at the forefront of the battle against this entity threatening the entire Seretei, YET AGAIN. Why am I not surprised?"
...If anything, though, after SS arc, regular shinigamis would have probably started questioning how powerful the captains are if one unhinged teenager on a mission managed to best most of them. Just sayingggg.
#just watched fade to black#and sir let me tell you someone should start counting the amount of times ichigo screams out rukia#also if I have been tasked to clean up that mess after the whole fight I would be like damn it's that rukia again#okay grandma time to take your meds and take a nap#ichiruki#bleach#rukia kuchiki#ichigo kurosaki#oh no i'm back to my old bullshit again
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Without going into detail I had a medical emergency earlier this week that saw me wind up in hospital for a brief stint. I'm OK, I've got another lifelong condition to manage but it's mainly pain-related and that means it's management through outpatient neurology for me.
TL;DR it sucks, but it won't kill me so I don't want to dwell on it.
I just want to shout out to my beautiful cat who slept beside me for twelve hours straight after I got home and was nice to the paramedics when they were doing their job. She makes even the worst situations bearable. Love her, here's an artist's impression I commissioned:
While I still have a lot of plans for working on my Wedding Peach site, this new complication may slow me down a bit. I'll keep on keeping on though, you know me. Thanks for your patience.
#personal#my insurance should cover the ambulance#but all these things#like seeing specialists#and getting new meds#while i've had to take several days off work#it's ridiculous how small the safety net in this country is now#i don't qualify for any kind of support because of how they decide whether a condition is stable or not - if not stable no support#i'm not going to vent about all this now#i try to keep this blog a positive space#but damn is it frustrating#at least I have a PERFECT CAT who is BEAUTIFUL#she is even sleeping beside me again RIGHT NOW
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adhd is when you shoot for the moon but you forgot the rocket fuel and by the time you realize it everyones already on the moon and then you panic and crash into the sun and it explodes
#my meds stopped working and i didnt know thats something that can fucking happen apparently???#like i knew eventually my body can get used to medicine that the effect kind of dulls but for some reason this time around i thought#that my body just decided to become lazier since the meds were already working anyway. cuz thats the thing as soon as smth is made#easier for me even if its the thing thats supposed to make the disability less disabling i get too relaxed and end up fucking up anyway#so i assumed my fucking cells worked the same way LMAO. they still technically work like i can feel my energy spike when it kicks in#but everything else like focus and memory went down and i thought oh so its just a me problem then. my habits are getting worse#even though ive been doing everything the same like setting reminders checking my schedule. hell ive been setting MORE reminders#to make up for the memory thing and i didnt even realize i just knew i had to compensate since it feels like my memory is getting#worse again. and i only figured this out bc my brother showed me an icecreamsandwich video with him talking about the EXACT FUCKING#THING IM GOING THRU WORD FOR WORD#i have to bring this up with my doctor next week so maybe i have to take different meds. i wonder if this will be a recurring thing#i guess one thing that hasnt changed is that im still slow as hell and stuff only comes to me 5 hours after the fact#its 6 in the morning and i only JUST realized that the word froyo is probably short for frozen yogurt#yapping#adhd
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big dog little dog energy. uh anyway.
[id: two drawings of conor garland & nikita zadorov as furries (a russel terrier & a great dane) referencing the video of them shoving each other at practice. text reads "lil' push!" & "BIG SHOVE!" end id.]
#vancouver canucks#conor garland#nikita zadorov#hockey art#niksartstuffs#sorry for drawing real life nhl players as furries. it might happen again (depends on how embarrassed by this i am in the morning.)#i'd love to say its just cos i wanna practice w/ reference for my hockey furries but thats not the truth...#the truth is that conor garland is like some sort of terrier to me. what a special little guy. they may have lost yesterday but!#the garly girlies got a goal. that. matters. š„š„š„#anyway im like. actually feverish rn lol š¤ i need to take some meds and lie down haha myb that has smth to do with. this lapse of judgement#furry art#hockeyposting
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Itās disability pride month, and if you are disabled in the U.S. from Long Covid I want you to know that youāre not alone, and youāre valid in whatever you feel. Whether thatās sorrow at your new problems or rage at society for failing you, you are valid, and it is truly messed up that society is continuing to fail you.
#disability#trauma#chronic illness#long COVID#COVID#Tbh Iām not sure if I have long covid or not but I keep swinging between despair and fury#The brain fog SUCKS#I might have always had it but it feels especially bad now?#And I have all kinds of respiratory problems that got exacerbated#And possibly chronic fatigue but itās unclear#And Iām one of the lucky ones!!!#I can still exercise without needing three days of bed rest after!#I was so RELIEVED when it turned out I could do that#I did like. Three weeks of breathing rehab to make sure#Not sure if it helped but now Iām not getting post-exertional backlash nearly as much anymore#And I didnāt lose my sense of smell or get my taste messed up#And I donāt need a respirator just an inhaler and some allergy meds and to take frequent breaks#And like. I know so many people have it worse#And that suuuuucks#But EVEN THIS makes me want to scream and rail half the time#Update as of Sept 2024 ā this is no longer true#Got Covid again and now I canāt exercise without being too tired to move for three days#š#Probably will die mad about this actually#I had SUCH a good time working out one night#But then the next morning#Nope#head-to-toe muscle pain#couldnāt do any chores#Couldnāt even feed myself
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#fancy has made some strides with the babies and will now accept some affection#but she has also Changed and is much less confident and bright#and i noticed today that she has lost weight#so she's going to the vet when we can get her in on a Saturday#and hopefully there's nothing wrong#but if she can't pick up the threads of who she was#i#I don't know if we should keep the babies because it's having such an effect on her#she's never been anxious or nervous#meds help but also make her sleepy#she just isn't as engaged and spends a lot of time in her spots and not roaming#i know they're just rambunctious because they're young and have bad boundaries and maybe it will improve#but im so worried#to take them and then give them up again when they are so sweet and funny#i just#I don't know what to do#and my boyfriend is still really struggling with grief#im so tired#i just want it all to be good again#I want everything to go back to when everyone was healthy#they make me laugh and smile and they are beautiful to look at and I'm so lucky we found them but if they don't fit#we have to make a choice and it absolutely sucks#i hate this year so much
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a dood before i pass out
#wip#im sick again and i mainly did art to remember to stay up and take my meds lol#otherwise i would have been asleep all day
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can sm tell me to take my meds in like. an hour.... thanks
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a friendly giant tries to gently approach tiny me but they donāt know i accidentally lapsed on my antidepressants for a week and i just start biting the shit out of their hand the second its in reach like fucking shredding that thing im like a two inch bundle of knives and claws and i know a rage only held by people who realize theyāre acting unmedicated but cannot restrain it. bc of the being unmedicated. get bit idiot.
#im not tagging this lmfao#im okay!! i will be okay. when i had that cvs flare a week or two ago i couldnt take my meds the whole time#and i am back on my meds!!!!!!! HOWEVER. THEY HAVENT KICKED IN YET#its so fast to detox from these bitches but it takes a month or two of taking them to feel the full effect#so like. i know ill be okay! but my brain is a bag of cats rn. idk how i used to live like this. just rawdogging life#girl the mental illness is mental illnessing#also like. my brain meds help my fibro. so ive been exhausted and my joint pains been soooo way worse#and im having weird back pain that could be the fibro or could be the kidney stones coming back!!#again i am okay and medicated and talking w my doctors. ill be fine#BUT ALSO GOTDAM. WHAT A TIME IN MY BODY RN.
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I dont think some people understand how truly awful and hellish withdrawals from some psych medications are.
#I feel like many many people see it as an overreaction when in reality someone actually feels like they are dying from wds#resent the fact that SO many doctors just prescribe shit all over the place nonstop without explaining the full risks n side effects#itās scary as fuck honestly#I cannot tell yāall how many meds I have been put on that made me feel worse#or how many times Iāve ran out and not been able to pay for the shit#resulting in an absolute living fucking hell that does not let up until taking the substance again#meds are tricky.. itās hard to have a definitive opinion in either direction (anti vs pro medication) because each individual is unique#sometimes meds save peopleās lives#sometimes they make people suicidal#sometimes they cause complications that literally kill people#sometimes theyāre exactly what someone needed to be okay#you just canāt generalize and say statements like ALL MEDS ARE BAD because that simply isnāt true#and you canāt assume everyoneās body/mind will react to a certain medication the same way yours did#oops#accidentally did a tag rant#rant#medical#psychiatry#medication#withdrawal#withdrawals#mental illness#mental health#psych meds#psych medications#medications#prescription medication#prescription medications#american healthcare#healthcare
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I feel like absolute garbage today so no new art (sorry to the peeps whose commissions i promised to do today) but here is an update on this thing. Amputated part of its waist which is good, glued its legs on back to front which is. Unfortunate.
#n3783457#my art#combination bad headache and fucked up my meds so ive been been seconds from throwing up for two hours straight#bleh#going to lay down and see if not having a cat stomping on my stomach helps the nausea#been taking my meds again like a good person for like six days but the very physical anxiety symptom that used to drive me to alcoholism is#still here. anyway. that's two years worth of oversharing for the art account. good night.#someone put what i think is a homestuck tag on this already and i consider that an act of aggression#go back to misidentifying my original art as welcome to nightvale or magnus archives if you must but homestuck?
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You know, when I kept getting asked "so you didn't ever have severe pains before now?" in the hospital and I kept replying "I have a high pain tolerance" I meant it. However, there is only so much pain my tiny 4'9" body can hold... (aka I am sweating and in agony bc I'm getting told to use LESS severe pain meds so I don't rely on them too much and it is AWFUL)
#moe talks a lot#i was shaking earlier and despite the fact i sound like im gonna cry#and the fact that my mom can pick out im about to cry from pain bc im trying to take less pain meds#LIKE MY MOM IS INSTRUCTING ME TO DO#shes like well why arent you taking any pain meds#BECAUSE THERE ARE TWO AVAILABLE OPTIONS AND ON A SIX HOUR TIMER#i cant take both at once or else what happens to me if i hurt before the six hours is up#i have to manage them in a way that allows me to benefit from both and being told im doing it wrong#after being told well its your fault it got so bad because you never complained about pain before#YEAH NO JOKE? REALLY? I NEVER DID? because everyone acts like im too young to feel that kinda pain#oh youre hurting? just wait until youre older#and its currently agony to breathe again but that i guess is also my fault bc im trying to use pain meds#holy moly i just want to not get dizzy standing up cause wow dang#sure would be nice if the multiple incisions in my stomach didnt THROB every time i sneezed or coughed or cleared my throat#but since i didnt use much pain meds before because i would be mocked for being too much of a baby its like#welp damn now i could really use some and im being called out for being too reliant#anyway time to sleep more because that means im not noticing my pain#im literally smaller than most children and so i do understand my body size makes people worried about the medication intake#but can i please just go a day without being asked how much im taking or when i last took it or if im gonna cry#anyway sorry for the excessive rant today never really had surgery or anything so this is brand spankin new suffering
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